#im also thinking of writing the cliff scene. because i can be so sad and devastating with it. you dont KNOW | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

primofate · 4 years ago

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im feeling kinda akward since its my first time requesting,i really really really like your writings and im wondering if you could do some angst for albedo, anything you feel like tbh, but if may i be a little selfish i was thinking on something like he hurt you, so you break up with him or maybe he break up with you and regret later, im in love with the genius and your writings so why not lol, hope you are doing well, xoxoxooxox

Thanks for the request anon. <3 Sorry it took so long, but I’m feeling angst today so here goes. Let me know what you think <3

QUEUED POST

Scenario: Breaking up

Characters: gn! reader x Albedo

Warnings: angst, break ups, regrets, did I say angst?

Categories: angst in Part 1, comfort in Part 2 (It was getting too long so split it into two parts)

Read: (Part 2) (Part 3 - Final)

Albedo

Alone.

These days you found yourself alone in your shared home. It had been nearly a year since the two of you decided to live together. Maybe that was a bad idea.

You were smitten. He was such an intelligent man, and truth be told you loved how his mind worked. He was silent and mostly kept to himself at first, but with you, there were subtle touches, fleeting kisses. Oh and his eyes, the way his eyes brightened or the way his lips turned up at the sight of you. The way he held you close at nights, up until the morning.

Gone were those days.

He was hardly home. The intelligent man you had fallen in love with, was also a workaholic. Perhaps you should’ve seen it coming. There were so many signs.

Maybe he changed. Maybe you changed. But the little things weren’t enough anymore. He came home just to sleep and wake up, and he was off again.

“Bedo, have you got some time off on the weekend? We haven’t been up to Starsnatch Cliff in a while,” you had prodded him a few days ago, wondering if the problem would be solved if you made the first move.

“Sorry, Y/N, we’re just about to discover more about the properties of electro crystals... It’ll be useful if we want to sustain higher energy concentrations on...” and just like that he had gone off a tangent explaining the whole thing. You smiled a little, it was still endearing how excited he got discussing those things.

But you couldn’t help but be lonely at how he seemed to love his research more than you.

‘Maybe I just need to be more proactive. That’s it! I’ll go and visit him at the lab today!’ Surprising him was one of the things that you had always wanted to do. But not a lot of things got past Albedo. He was observant like that. You made a quick run to the bakery, getting him some croissants and welcomed yourself into the Favonius Headquarters.

You looked up at the sign on his laboratory door. That sign was always there though, Klee had told you about it, and Sucrose had also talked about it once or twice before, telling you that it wouldn’t be a good idea to go in if the sign was up. But when was it ever down? So, you shrugged, and pushed the door open with a wide smile.

“What are you doing here?!” There’s a wild look in Albedo’s eyes the moment you step in. He didn’t appreciate being disturbed. You tilted your head a little at his reaction, you weren’t expecting that.

“Oh, since you’ve been so busy these days I just thought I’d drop by and give you something to--”

“Y/N, did you not see the sign on the door? No disturbances, even from you,”

“I’ll just be quick, I’m just dropping this off,” you lift the paper bag from the bakery and lay it down on the nearest table. Albedo closes his eyes with a sigh.

“...We’re working on something dangerous right now, I don’t have time to eat. Please take it back,”

Surprisingly, you obey quite quickly, and take the paper bag back into your hands. Annoyance start to pulse in your veins. “Anything else you want me to do? Maybe disappear so I don’t bother you or your research so much?”

Sucrose had been standing there the whole time, and you can see the slight wince on her face at your cold statement... But Albedo had returned it ten fold, snapping an answer back. “Yes, Y/N, that would be excellent, don’t get in the way. Stop being irritating at the wrong moment,”

You didn’t expect how much it would sting. Your shoulders slump downwards at the realization that this... had gone too far. You couldn’t take it anymore. Sucrose opens her mouth, but doesn’t know what to say looking back and forth between you and Albedo.

The Kreideprinz had continued with his task as if nothing had happened at all, but he knew what he said. He didn’t want any interferences nor accidents happening in the lab and that was the only thing he cared about at the moment.

Your foot moves to step back, but your eyes are glued to Albedo. You can only see his back. His hair tied up neatly, the shoulders that you loved to wrap your arms around and his hands that were always gentle. You took a good look, drinking the whole scene in like you hadn’t had a drop of water in days.

This was the last time you would lay eyes on him and it broke you into so many pieces. You turned away without another word, Sucrose staring at the door, before she decided that she needed to follow you. “I-I’ll be back, Master Albedo,” she rarely ever abandoned an experiment, but she knew that you needed a friend right now.

Ironic, because it should have been Albedo running after you, but instead the green-haired girl caught up to you just as you reached the fountain in the middle of Mondstadt. “Y/N!” she jogs, and stops when you do as you hear your name.

Tears prickled your cheeks, but they were more of frustration than sadness. You stand there for a moment, drying your tears and turning around towards Sucrose, gaze on the pavement. “Y/N...” Sucrose approaches carefully, hand resting on your shoulder.

“...I don’t know anything other than Albedo, Sucrose,” you start, a curtain of memories flashing through your mind. “...Without him, there isn’t much reason for me to stay in Mondstadt,” Sucrose shakes her head rather hastily. “H-He’s just... a little occupied right now, Y/N, I’m sure he doesn’t mean what he said,” You close your eyes, the scene repeating in your head.

“Anything else you want me to do? Maybe disappear so I don’t bother you or your research so much?”

“Yes, Y/N, that would be excellent, don’t get in the way. Stop being irritating at the wrong moment,”

A hard lump forms on your throat at how hard you try not to sob. How hard you try to keep yourself together and Sucrose sees it from the way your lips tremble. “Sucrose, please watch over him,” and that is also the last that Sucrose sees of you.

That night, Albedo arrives home exhausted, just as he always does. But now that he was home, he could at least expect a warm meal and a warm hug. A soft smile tugs on his lips at the thought.

When he turned the lights on, he was met with a strange stillness instead. His hand stays on the switch as his eyes scan the living room. It was...quiet. There were no plates on the table, and there were no sounds from the kitchen.

Deep in the pits of his stomach there’s an anxiety that starts bubbling up. He brushes it off, opting instead to check the kitchen. “Y/N?”

Empty.

His footsteps hasten as he opens the bedroom door, expecting you to be curled up there, asleep.

Empty.

Albedo takes in a shaky breath. You were probably just out in town, doing some late night shopping. Yeah, that’s it, perhaps you just didn’t have enough ingredients for dinner today and--his eyes land on the bedside table.

The photo frame is gone. The photo of the two of you standing side by side together with comfortable smiles on your faces, his hand on your waist, and the house on the background.

He throws open the closet doors. Your clothes are gone. Your shoes are gone. Even your scent seemed to have disappeared. The anxiety that was once a small bubble in his stomach had started to claw it’s way out, wrenching his heart in places that he didn’t know could hurt. The tears pooling in his eyes were so foreign that he didn’t even know what was happening until he hears himself gasp back a sob.

You’re gone.

Suddenly it was so hard to breathe, but he pulls himself up and out the door. There’s no way. Where would you go? Perhaps you were just around Mondstadt, trying to get a breath of fresh air to calm your nerves. He searches everywhere. The church, the tavern, the Good Hunter and even atop the rooftop of the Favonius Headquarters. There was a decent view of the city there, and his eyes roam the streets, just to get a glimpse of you.

“...Please...” There’s another lump in his throat, his eyes dart around looking for any small sign of you.

“Albedo? Tired?” you ask as he returns home one day. He merely lets out a small “Mm,” and pulls a chair out from the dining table to sit on. You walk into the kitchen to fetch him a cup of tea, and he snatches your hand to press a soft kiss on the back of it. “Thank you, love,”

“...Please!” his grip on the stone walls of the rooftop tighten. His vision blurs.

“Al! Don’t do that!” you try to swat his hand away from the pot, a short laugh coming off of your lips at how mischievous he could be sometimes, trying to dip his finger into the sauce. He has a grin on his face as he successfully tastes the sauce off his finger, making a sound of approval as he draws you in for a light kiss on your forehead, “It’s good, as always,”

His legs buckle, and he finds himself on his knees, hands fisted upon the cold stone wall. “At least tell me where you've gone! I can’t--” he doesn’t know when the last time he cried was, but whenever it was, he doesn’t remember it to be this bad. The pain was unlike any injury he had, it grasped so tightly at his heart.

“Anything else you want me to do? Maybe disappear so I don’t bother you or your research so much?”

“Yes, Y/N, that would be excellent, don’t get in the way. Stop being irritating at the wrong moment,”

He furiously shakes his head because he knows that it was his fault. “I didn’t mean it, please give them back,” as if there was someone else who took you away. As if there was a God listening to him right now.

He realizes that the worst of it was not that you had left, but that you had left no traces of you behind. No photo. Not a piece of clothing. Not a trace of your existence.

Nothing for him to hold on to.

That night, he dragged himself back home. Face flushed and hot from the tears he had shed and the ones he was attempting to hold back.

That night, he painfully got into bed.

Alone.

Taglist: @larkspyrr @rim0na @sweeti-pie @l3mon-mxshroom @hai-q-haikyuu @tkshoki @kyquu @KimbapSana @fanfictionenthusiast

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poguesgold · 3 years ago

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how did you feel about season? i know most people liked it better than season 1 but i’m not sure how i feel yet🤔 might need to rewatch it

okay this ended up soooo long so i'm giving a tl;dr review here and if anyone cares to read my insanely long thought dump you can feel free. this part is spoiler free also!!

cons: i think they should have further developed the s1 storyline rather than conjuring up an entirely new treasure and conflict; i don't think they did the characters justice a lot of the time, particularly kie and jj; too much yelling and running not enough hanging out; the finale cliff hanger was a stupid writing choice

pros: cleo!!; pope-centric plotline!!!; amazing jjpope moments in the improv sequences; never a boring moment; rafebarry oh my god????; neck kiss shirtless wrestling holding hands standing unnecessarily close jjpope rot; just a straight up nine hour long adrenaline rush and i love that shit.

overall: i definitely did not like it more than s1, but i still REALLY loved it. i think it's worth the watch, just don't go into it expecting good writing or realistic injuries or a comprehensive plot LMFAO. what saves the season is the pogues' chemistry and their improv sequences, for real. and cleo. you WILL get angry about the shitty script and characterization if you’re really invested in that part of things, but as far as vibes and dopamine high it was awesome. it was a fun watch and i'll definitely rewatch at least once to soak it in properly

please this is going to be soooo long i apologize in advance. but i have a lot of thoughts. also ⚠️⚠️spoilers ahead!!⚠️⚠️

most of this review is going to be criticisms tbh so sorry for that but this show kinda sucks (affectionately<3)

i thought season 2 was an absolute TRAINWRECK as far as writing goes. jonas pate was basically like. this season we're going to have an even BIGGER and BETTER treasure!!! but the exact same thing is going to happen. like. we already had gold. and that's what they were going to the bahamas for at the end of season 1 for anyway????? it would have been so easy to just develop the original storyline further, i just cannot figure out why they would completely abandon it for another mediocre storyline. (i LOVED that this other mediocre storyline was pope-centric and the main character energy he was given this season. but. they. could have done that?? with the first storyline?????)

i hate that they brought big john back so so much. SO much. literally it was the stupidest most idiotic lazy cheesy plot choice in the world. it doesn't make sense, we like saw his literal bones at one point like his lifeless corpse, and WHY would they bring back a key character from the PREVIOUS ARC when they created an ENTIRELY NEW CONFLICT AND PLOTLINE FOR THIS SEASON???? jonas pate stuck it in for shock value and cliff hanger in hopes of securing a season 3, and i hate him for it. he's such a terrible writer white men have it so easy

someone in the neck kiss truthers discord earlier pointed out that jb's dead father returning after like a year and a half of thinking he was dead would probably be more traumatic that healing at this point, and i agree so much. also, you know that they're not going to use it for good either way. they're going to use his dad coming back as a way to further traumatize him somehow because obx writers are jombeephobic. and i wouldn't put it past them to bring him back just to kill him off again. jonas pate wants to write john b torture porn and i am TIRED of it

my least favorite thing about season 2 was the characterization. they really did just disregard the characters they created in season 1. kie was completely ooc for like three episodes, and it wasn't because she was mourning. it was just shitty writing. she had no character outside of her relationships this season, which has been my fear from the very beginning and why i have never wanted kie with any of the pogues. season 2 diminished her character to the female love interest, and that just sucked so bad for her.

whether you're a jjpope or not, season 2 completely changed their friendship dynamic. the only time we got glimpses of the season 1 jjpope dynamic was in the improv sequences when rudy and jd took it upon themselves. also during their hugs LMFAO. which is also an acting choice. the writing completely disregarded their friendship and dynamic. it was weird as fuck it was all weird. i also hated that kie and sarah's scripted interactions were just them talking about boys. another case of friendships again being completely disregarded for the cishet relationships.

i just really feel like all of the characters were handled poorly this season, which is crazy because literally ALL we asked for was backstory and character development and pogue screentime. but jonas pate instead decided to write ten episodes of nonstop running and yelling and fuckinf adrenaline, with an ooc script. for funsies

i feel like the magic of season 1 was lost. the vibe of season 1 that makes it so comforting and rewatchable and lovely is sort of just lost in all the silly plot. we see snatches of it here and there, but they feel crammed between unnecessary action scenes and stunts and shouting when we would have been happy with ten episodes of the pogues hanging out in each other's bedrooms.

NOW IM GOING TO TALK THINGS I LIKED OKAY OKAY

i seriously DID love watching it. we pulled an all nighter in the neck truthers discord and binged the entire season and the adrenaline of that kept me going for the rest of the week. it was literally fucking insane absolutely batshit and i LOVED it. the writing was horrible but like. it's obx we know it isn't good LMFAOO. it's part of the charm

i definitely don't like it more than s1, but i did still like it a lot. i LOVED how pope centric it was, like he fr had such main character energy this season and it was wonderful. even though the storyline was weird and didn't make sense jd did so well lolol he did so wonderfully. i loved seeing pope get the attention he deserves this season.

JJPOPE MOMENTS. i was definitely sad they didn't have an arc to themselves like they did season 1, but oh my god jd and rudy FED US with jjpope improv moments this season. the NECK KISS? the WRESTLING? every single one of their hugs?????? they're insane. it sucked that they really didn't have any scenes alone but we take what we can get.

SPEAKING OF GAYS LET'S TALK ABOUT RAFEBARRY. because?? oh my god??? first season it was like a crack ship and then season 2 came out and... what are we supposed to do ignore it? they are literally??? gay????? it's jarring they're insane. i am so so invested in them it's kind of unreal how deep i got into this ship in such a short amount of time (follow @rafebarry babies <33)

cleo. i love cleo. the best new thing to come out of this season for sure. clarah is coming strong i can feel it and i am SO ready. i know that they're most likely going to move toward a cleopope romance next season, which i don't hate? i'm bothered only because a) it's obvious it's mostly being done to get pope out of the way for jiara, and b) i think people often push two dark-skinned characters into a ship just because they're both dark-skinned, and that yucks me out. but i will say i really liked their moments together in s2 and i think they could be really good together if they're canon s3 (which they probably will be.)

overall like. it was a fun watch. i retained like 2% of the plot i was just there for the vibes and dopamine high and that was totally fine. i want to take the pogues out of jonas pate’s greedy little white man fingers and give them the character and relationship development they deserve, but we can’t have it all i guess. the cinematography this season i think i liked better than season 1, wasn’t a huge fan of that weird yellow filter tho. also the lighting. obx lighting guys get demoted challenge. umm yeah season 1 supremacy but season 2 had amazing vibes

#jesus clearly i haven't talked about this enough yet #send in other asks if you want i'm absolutely insane #sorry if there's typos i am not reading through this again #if i'm incoherent you'll just have to deal #asks #s2 asks

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sukirichi · 3 years ago

Text

[ BROKEN RECORDS ; asks ]

💌 — love letter from @kyriaan

from track 007.

Okay okay im still kinda meh'ish' but i really wanted to answer you so 😭 ill try to compile both my answer to your answer on my love letter and my hyped review on track 7 <3 so yeah another long ass rant from me 😩💕Suki... Suki pls I totally forgot Tsumu had a crush on us Suki... And then poor Tsumu ir there sulking cause he still likes u- JFBFBDVDVSJCHDHSIA omfg i wanted so much to hug him my baby I like him so much 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 and he was trying so hard to behave while just sitting there sad fhfhfvbbshsjfhbdjaofhffhsoshd TSUMU YOU'RE STILL IN MY TOP 3 BABY 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂

And then you throw the whole dancing scene with suna and I dont know whos on my top 3 anymore 🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃 SUKIIIIIIII THAT SCENE ALONE GJGJBFBSJCNFNKSOSNF OMFG IM FALLING SO HARD FOR SUNA I THINK? I think my top 3 had 4 dudes in it cause 3rd place has Suna and Atsumu tied?? Hfhfbfbfhdhsja I CANT PICK?? BUT BUT I WAS FEELING STUPIDLY DOWN WHEN READING THAT AND THAT SCENE ALONE MADE ME FEEL SO SOFT IT WAS SO CUTE AND OMG IF SUNA DID THAT TO ME I WOULD DROP ON MY KNEES AND ASK HIM TO MARRY ME CAUSE OMFGGGFFFF DUDE EVEN WENT AHEAD AND SAID THAT WHOLE 'HES GOING TO BE ONE LUCKY GUY'

Oh shit im crying again that scene lets me emotional 😭😭😭😭 someone get me a sunrin irl pls

Anyways the way that suna knows y/n is just.... FUCKING END UP TOGETHER ALREADY FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JUST JBVSHSJBEHSISJ

Also how powerful are we?? HOW FUCKING POWERFUL ARE WE TO SCORE SUNA KITA AND TSUMU?? ARE YOU GONNA TELL. ME IF OIKAWA MOFO TOORU APPEARED HE WOULD ALSO BE ON HIS KNEES FOR US?? (okay no wait... No nooo i would legit drop anyones ass for tooru hes that powerful for me like sorry suna was fun but TOORU)

Yo nah but the whole Kita sex scene- let me breath bestie LET ME BREATH CAUSE I WAS HOT BUT AT SAME TIME I WAS FEELING GUILTY 😂😂😂😂 ESPECIALLY WHEN HE WAS FEELING DISAPPOINTED NEXT DAY LIKE KITA PLS BABY WHAT WERE YOU EXPECTING?? 😬😬😬😬 But at same time his 'ill fuck the thought of him out of you tonight' I ALMOST MOANED YASSSSS TELL ME DADDY HOLY SHITTTTT

👀👀👀👀 Still not a kita simp ✌️✌️🤏✌️

Okay Kita deserves the best tho I mean okay he went there as a y/n mom's plan but he did ended up helping alot... Especially cause he knows no matter what y/n heart will always be suna's and pls give Kita the best ending possible cause he deserves someone who will trully love him and show him the world cause mah boy deserves it

*breaths in breaths out* i hated this scene- not in a bad way but shit i hate rejections... To the point im kinda afraid of confessing now cause i despise the feeling of being rejected... The best i can descrive it it like this coldness in your chest that descends your whole body and then you feel frozen in place.. Thats how it feels for me I hate it I absolutely despise it- its also the feeling i have when in a really bad situation and ugh...

The suna part made. Me feel this no matter how many times i reread it the feeling doesnt lessen it keeps being there cause (okay you probably are tired already of me saying this but) Suki I feel like I cant put it in words how much of a fucking good of a writer you are. Ill go ahead and say you are by far my favorite writer the fact i always feel so engaged and the fact i always feel like im there its just- it blows my mind.

I felt like suna was personally rejecting me and i hated it- i swear the moment he said prove it I almost screamed HOW? My brain had to take a moment to just slap me and say: 'kya you reading this is not happening chill-' cause i was already sobbing uncontrollably... I even whimpered the dont leave me 😬 my sadass went to bed feeling so sad thanks to suna... Man i wanted so much to hug him and i swear i would give him as much love as he gave y/n cause well i kin suna alot in this series cause im like that im a giver i treat others the way i would like to be treated (reason why ive been down lately ✌️) and i cant blame suna for finally setting boundaries- his call tho 'do i not stand a chance with you anymore y/n? Are you really not capable of falling in love with me?".... Oh suna... We are in love with you.. We always were we're just fucking stupid 😩

Also mari pls go jump off a cliff <3 youre in need dear cause sleeping with other man just to separate suna and y/n <3 i want so much to punch her 🙂🙃

Now for the love letter part (im so sorry for this being so long ✌️)

You said that if we asked suna he woukd say that he genuinely loved mari okay... Ill go ahead and say yes he liked mari he even learned how to love her and he genuinely cared for her BUT and heres where my personal view comes in so maybe ill be biased here still for me that was just a he loves her as in he cares you also love your friends and care for them but he didnt love her- and by this I mean- he could never be fully committed for her. Yes he loved her and he felt happy with her but like track 7 proved everything he would do in the back of his mind was y/n he deeply wished Mari was her and for that he just loved Mari cause he learned how to care about her- but he never forgot who he trully was in love it. Also the happiness he experienced with Mari was pretty much the one I experienced the bliss of having someone there and that bliss also made suna turn a blind eye to all the red flags from Mari cause to him all the jealousy meant she cared and thats toxic but suna was so desperate for some sort of 'she cares' that even all the possessiveness was bliss for him... And that makes my heart clench for suna...

'suna had to put an effort for the relationship' and saddly i feel like mari didnt... Mari didnt care mari was there because she was a fangirl of suna and got lucky, the way she just discarded him so effortlessly that proved-screamed how much she loved him- she didnt. She was just possessive over him she liked the whole 'hes mine' dynamic and suna was the perfect boyfriend cause he was giving her the world... What he wanted someone to do for him.

Also yeah suna and y/n might have been spurred from them being fuck buddies but well love doesnt really have an agenda- they just clicked, understood each other and had chemistry yeah they had tons and tons of sex but feelings started not because of sex but thanks to their deep connection... Also that dsncing scene in track 7 that alone spoke for their whole relationship- that alone is enough to defend their feelings for each other- yes it might jave started just as fuck buddies but ended up in them loving each other deeply and that is enough love after all doesnt need a perfect start. It can start out of the most stupid ways.

You said life with excitement and fun wouldn't be permanent or real.. Honestly i think it could be.. Cause i mean when you love someone that deeply your life always feels exciting even with the littlest things and that the purest kind of love. Even just going for a walk at the beach would be fun for them or even staying up watching movies i believe suna and y/n would always find a way to make their lofe exciting without much effort.

Also it kinda makes me. Sad when i see some anon saying that y/n and suna relationship are toxic? It makes me. Confused maybe because I was in such extremely toxic one (girl i sweat if you search for toxic relationship my ex's face will be there as an example 🙄) that Mari to me screams toxic! Possessive, manipulative, jealous and a few more if I think closely about it while with y/n and suna they are just two idiots that are hurting each other cause they're just that: idiots one that is afraid to get hurt and the other that keeps hoping- dont get me wrong what they're doing is not healthy but i dont find it toxic honestly

Sorry for the extreme long rant 8D I tried to keep it short but you always make me so hyped to talk about your works 😩

Hfbfbfhfhfieia

[ from saeren ]

NAHHH CUZ I LOVE TSUMU SO MUCH HERE HE WAS SO PRECIOUS. I didn’t write too much about them in college but Atsumu was so cute when he crushed on YN. he was always sending her memes and cute texts like “have you eaten” “good morning” and she’d feel so awkward because she doesn’t know how to let him down easy without hurting him. either way tsumu would feel hurt. AND YES PLS HE WAS SO SAD I MEAN, HIS CRUSH AND HIS BEST FRIEND NEARLY HAD SEX RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM SO THAT’S GOING TO HURT

SUNA AND ATSUMU TIED?? tbh I loved that dancing scene bcos suna is one of my faves and I really wanna do that with him hehehhehe. NAHHH PLEASE SAME IF SUNA DANCED WITH ME AND MADE A WEDDING PLAYLIST I’D BE LIKE boy what’re u waiting for let’s get married now !! n yes he said whoever YN will choose in the future will be one lucky guy IM SOBBING RN

naur cuz. there’s something about dating your best friend. I’m not saying a boyfriend wouldn’t know you as well but there’s something different when you’re best friends first. they could literally share eye contact and have a long ass conversation just from that. their connection is different.

HAJKALA AS FOR THE POWER, BR! YN IS A VERY CHARISMATIC AND FRIENDLY PERSON !! she’s like one of those people you meet that not only are they attractive as hell, but they’re also super approachable and down to earth. that’s why she’s so popular + she’s flirty and can make a stranger feel welcome or comfortable in the first meeting. SGSHJAK I WAS ACTUALLY PLANNING TO ADD OIKAWA HERE BUT I WANNA MAKE IT MORE INARIZAKI CENTRED

the seggs scene with kita SOBSSSS he’s such a soft dom IDC he knows where the clit is, he knows how to hit it. he’s a “your pleasure first before mine” type of guy. kita is perfect, PERIODT. HE GIVES DADDY VIBES HUH AHSKAA HE’S SO SWEET YET SEXY IM IN LOVE WITH HIM ISTG IF SUNA WASN’T OUR BEST FRIEND THEN I’D RUN FOR KITA ALL THE TIME. and I agree, kita deserves the best !! and don’t worry, I actually plan on giving kita the best ending, I promise you he’ll be fine (slight spoiler there)

YESSSSS OMG I’VE BEEN REJECTED BEFORE AND THAT’S EXACTLY HOW I FELT, MY BODY WAS SO COLD AND I WAS SO CONFUSED LIKE IT MAKES YOU THINK. am I not good enough, did I do something wrong, do you not wanna give me a chance or try it out but ofc I’d never say that out loud. AND KYAAA AAAH IM YOUR FAVORITE WRITER??? NO CUZ YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE ME CRY. I remember ur asks way back reckless era and you used to tell me that my writing made you picture the scenes easily and you felt you were there in that moment and I’m just so grateful thank you so much <33

NO BCOS WHEN SUNA SAID “prove it” I was like. this is it. that’s his hot boy shit moment. man’s has had enough of being thrown from one toxic relationship to another and he also deserves his good moments yknow. and you kin suna here?? BESTIE IM SORRY TO HEAR THAT, SUNA’S BEEN THROUGH A LOT HERE AHSJAKA. that’s true about suna tho !! he’s definitely affectionate + a giver. he’s happy being the one who gives most of the time but he’s a human as well, ofc he’d want to receive the same amount of love back. ALSO HIS PHONE CALLLLLL ugh tbh that part was the one that made me the saddest bcos he’s just. he wants to know if there’s really no more chance. all this time he never gave up. but he’s also tired so if yn says ‘no more’ then he’ll give up. its his way of respecting himself too ahsjaka

YOOOOO I AGREE WITH THAT. he cares for mari as a person but not 100% as a lover. but ofc he’s still thankful for how happy she made him because she was there at his worst. and that’s true, deep down suna still wishes that it was YN who’s right beside him. he will always ALWAYS want her back. he learned how to love mari in a way that was more out of mutual care but not in the way he loves YN. no that’s reserved only for YN – she will remain no 1 in his heart. AND YESSSSS the reason why suna overlooked the red flags was bcos to him, its something that was supposed to be “normal” like no perfect partner existed. he thought mari’s attitude of pushing YN away was normal, and its normal to want your partner’s best friend keep some distance but not to the point of mari’s place where she literally wants the two of them to cut each other out of their lives.

and aww I’m so happy that you realized how I wanted to portray suna and yn’s relationship. they’re….like the definition of youth in its freest form. they were fucking around and doing stupid things, but they had a connection. they had something deeper than just sexual intimacy. even if they never dated or even if YN never proposed the idea of it, they would’ve actually been still great friends. and oooh I actually don’t remember saying life with excitement and fun wouldn’t be real HAHAHAHA so I can’t comment further on that. but I think when I ‘said’ those I probably meant that it’s not always going to be all rainbows and unicorns in a relationship. there’s no such thing as a relationship that’s always happy and sweet 24/7, but ofc it can be sweet and it can be pure even with the little things <33 they just need to work on it.

hmmm tbhhhh… suna and yn are toxic in a way that they refuse to let each other go when they clearly can’t meet halfway. toxic doesn’t have to be limited in just being mari-like in which they are possessive or manipulative, because then if we’d drive deeper into yn’s personality, then she’d be stringing suna all along and that’s unfair of her. she knows suna wants more and yet she remained being friends with him, which totally isn’t a bad thing, but it’s because she keeps flirting with him and is so romantically comfortable with him that she doesn’t realize it’s hurting suna because he’ll give double meanings to that. their relationship is ‘toxic’ because they’re not entirely good for each other, they’re not that ready to be with one another yet and neither is the world letting them be in peace, so forcing their relationship to a point they’re hurting another is the toxic part.

[ from @kyriaan ]

Ah also not me feeling all proud and mushy cause my analysis made you mind blown fjfbdnsjdkpa 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 I guess its also because i see this story as a really big mirror of my own toxic relationship sonits extremely easy for me to get it... And oh boy the way i kin suna here

But dhdhfjdospdhfbsoa 🥺🥺🥺🥺 i feel happy now *huggles*

[ from saeren ]

and aah yes ofc, I’m really happy whenever someone can see the underlying details I scatter throughout the story !! yeah omg same hahahaha broken records is also half inspired by the toxic people I’ve met. I kin kita here tho and I’m so glad you’re happier now !!

#asks with naoya's trophy wife #series ( broken records )#tw: toxic

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xianglingslesbian · 4 years ago

Text

ewbts - my top moments

no i will never stop laughing at that abbreviation it’s beautiful. buckle in because this is gonna be long, and probably don’t read it unless you’ve watched/read kuroko’s basketball and like izuki lmaoooo

chapter 1: hatchling, awaken

Izuki swallows. “Why do you all think I can do this?”

Then Kiyoshi turns to him with steel in his eyes (that must be how he got nicknamed Iron Heart - he seriously never backs down!) and asks him very clearly, “Why don’t you?”

Why don’t I think I can be captain?

“Because nobody thought I could be until now.”

aka “ceru is a masochist”, exhibit 1/???. anyway lets hear it for insecurities!!

chapter 2: liftoff

Predictably, Kuroko drags him aside at practice the next day and says, “I have something to tell you, Izuki-senpai.”

Izuki smiles at him. “Is it about your five evil exes?”

Kuroko looks horrified. “My what?!”

i think im funny

chapter 3: crash landing

As Izuki walks off the court, he looks for flashing glasses and grey eyes.

He curses himself for the heavy sadness that falls over him like a blanket when he doesn’t spot them.

yay for “ceru is a masochist” exhibit 2!

Oh, he [Izuki] watched videos of Aomine, came up with strategy after strategy to corner him, but videos and strategies can only go so far. Aomine in real life is something else entirely, a flash of lightning setting the court on fire with the sheer elegance of his crazy street basketball. All one can do is sit back and watch, awed beyond belief. Nothing can curb the wild madness that is Aomine Daiki – unrestrained, gleeful insanity dancing across the court like it’s his playground.

i also rlly like this line, it has some pretty imagery and we all know im a slut for pretty imagery~

chapter 4: a broken bone grows back stronger

“All right,” Koganei says to himself, moving to stand in front of the hoop. “One more time.”

He jumps, raising the ball to just above his face and releasing it. It misses, and he lets out a cry of frustration.

Can he even do this? Is it worth the time?

Koganei bites back the wave of guilt that washes over him at the thought. Izuki, Kiyoshi, Tsuchida, Rinnosuke, Kagami, Kuroko – he’d be letting them down if he didn’t give this his best shot. They’re all so dedicated to basketball that they each have a special skill honed from years of practice and love for the sport. If he can’t bring anything of his own to the table, what will he mean to this team? Seirin makes him want to be a team player, to add his skills to theirs rather than shining on his own. The change is good, yes, but he doesn’t want to stop there – he doesn’t want to be useless.

He will not be useless.

a bit of context: in this fic, since hyuuga did not return, koga became the SG for seirin :D i think my favorite character to develop, apart from izuki, was koganei - it was so fun to imagine all the ways he could have gone!

chapter 5: spreading new wings

All too soon, the day of judgment arrives, and Seirin convenes in the gym one last time before they head off to the Winter Cup building. No one says anything; not Kagami, fresh from his training trip to America, not Izuki, not Kiyoshi or Riko. They simply stand there, breathing in the scent of cleaner and leather and something else that’s so entirely Seirin, and knowing that no matter what happens this Winter Cup, they will return to the gym different people than they were before.

Different, and better.

Then they head out and off to the opening ceremony of the Winter Cup, not looking back once as they do.

yay for more pretty words!!!

“Oh, no worries. The actual motivational part is coming. Anyway, as I was saying – Tōō was just better than us that day. It’s hard to admit, I know: far easier to blame yourself, say you didn’t give it your all, but you know; we all know. It was their day to shine, not ours. But I think we’ve worked hard enough and are in a good enough mindset to change that, today. We aren’t scared or apprehensive about Tōō and Aomine, because we’ve faced them before. We know what attitude they’ll walk into our game with, and that’s what we’re going to exploit!”

“You’re going to exploit,” corrects Tsuchida. “Unlike you, the rest of us aren’t manipulative bastards.”

That raises a bunch of cackles, which quiet down when Izuki gives his team a glare. It doesn’t work on Riko, however, who sniggers under her breath and smirks at him.

izuki highkey sucks at pep talks lmao

chapter 6: ride the storm

Kagami and Aomine were made for each other. Made for this rivalry, this intense competition that will push them to their very limits and carry them onto a plane that no ordinary human can reach. Neither can defeat the other per se - they’re destined to stand neck and neck forever. However, one has a trump card on his side; and that trump card can make all the difference in the world.

Aomine Daiki may be strong, but Kagami Taiga is just as good. And damn him if the power of Kagami’s determination coupled with Kuroko’s unshakeable support won’t overwhelm the undisputed king of basketball.

Move aside, light bulb, Izuki thinks vindictively. The tube light is here to replace you.

pretty words. gay words. i love them (aokaga + izuki being a salt man lmao).

chapter 7: eagle versus aegis

“So bitter,” he [Izuki] reflects aloud, answering Himuro’s question.

That’s the emotion in his eyes. That’s what I might have become, if I had let my anger grow.

And suddenly he isn’t seeing Himuro Tatsuya anymore, but a version of himself, a version with darkened eyes and a mocking smile and pain and rage bubbling below the surface. Immensely talented, but not able to break the last barrier. Because he’s an ordinary man, and it’s as much as an ordinary man can do.

Strong, so strong. But also so terribly, heartbreakingly weak. Weak in a way that today’s Izuki Shun will never be.

GOD where do i even start w/this scene its literally everything i’ve ever wanted to write ksjfhsfj

chapter 8: clawing through mirages

Izuki’s taken aback for a millisecond before he continues his mad dash towards Murasakibara, letting out a war cry as the center makes to simply toss the ball into the hoop.

“It wasn’t their intention,” says a quiet but familiar voice. “But, this is the result of Kiyoshi-senpai and the other upperclassmen’s tenacity.”

Izuki grins, feeling new strength fill him up.

Together, huh? Okay. Together.

“This is where it ends for you!” shouts the voice, becoming stronger.

Not one, but two hands knock the ball out of Murasakibara’s hands and onto the ground. Kuroko shimmers into vision, smiling at Izuki with all the happiness in the world, just as the final buzzer rings.

i loved writing this match tbh, yousen is super underrated!

chapter 9: catch the updraft

21 - 22, in their favour at long last. Izuki grins at Kasamatsu, who shakes his head wearily.

“Using my own advice against me. What a terrible student you are,” he says, affecting an old man’s voice.

“The true student is the one who beats the master at his own game,” Izuki says quickly, sliding back into their familiar banter. “I swore to myself, my drive would beat your drive today, kitakore.”

“When did you get so wise?” asks Kasamatsu with a sigh, ignoring his pun and receiving the ball from Kobori, who was quick to grab it once Koga scored. Izuki just laughs, not bothering to reply and instead focusing carefully on Kasamatsu’s movements.

Kasamatsu shifts his weight right, left, then right again. Izuki narrows his eyes, trying to figure out what the hell his upperclassman is doing—

But it’s far too late, as Kasamatsu successfully passes through his defence in his moment of distraction, ball clutched tightly in hand. The sound of the scoring whistle is shrill and unpleasant to Izuki’s ears, and his chest stings at the loss.

“What was that about the main course?” Kasamatsu teases, wearing an enormous grin as he comes forward to guard Izuki once more.

izuki + kasamatsu banter is so so fun to write y’all have no idea

chapter 10: headwinds

This is your fault. If you’d been a better captain, a better point guard, a better everything, none of this would’ve happened. Seirin would have been well in the lead and controlling the game—

Izuki shakes his head violently, trying to get rid of his intrusive thoughts. He knows he’s a good captain, and doing this to himself will do no good for the rest of the team. He has to be strong for them. He has to lead them to victory, he can’t be a weak person overwhelmed by emotion. But it’s so hard to breathe, suddenly, and Izuki’s about to sink when—

“Don’t worry, Captain. I’ll take care of this match today,” says a confident and familiar voice, and a hand claps down on Izuki’s shoulder. He turns, a little surprised by the sudden contact, to find Koganei’s cat mouth set in a determined frown. “You can rest your hopes on me. I’ll be Seirin’s wings for as long as you need me to.”

kogazuki brotp feels man. kogazuki brotp feels.

chapter 11: cliff edge

Riko nods, sobering up a little. “I do know. And… I have to admit, I was a little harsh on you in the early days… I kept comparing you to Hyūga-kun.” She looks at the ground briefly, then raises her head to continue, meeting Izuki’s eyes with no hint of doubt in her own brown irises. “But then I saw how different you were. How you were never willing to give up, even if you were the worst player in the world. That’s what… that’s what made me truly believe in you.” She swallows thickly, taking a deep breath, but not averting her gaze from his.

The honesty and trust in her eyes is what shatters Izuki’s calm.

He steps forward, and she rises too, opening her arms. Then he hugs her tightly, murmuring, “Thank you for having faith in me.”

The “Of course. You’re family,” that she whispers back fills Izuki’s already overflowing heart even further.

Eventually, he lets her go, and she drops lightly to the ground, straightening her sweater and skirt.

“We never speak of this,” Izuki warns her, moving towards the door of the room.

Riko nods, back to her usual haughty demeanour. “Of course. No one can know we’re actually big softies who care a lot for each other.”

“To them, we’re just sarcastic jerks,” Izuki agrees. “And that’s the way it stays.”

anyone said izuriko brotp???? this fic is just platonic feels tbh

chapter 12: overcast skies

What should I do? Someone tell me! the voice cries out in Izuki’s head, a voice he hasn’t heard since the loss to Tōō. It is the same voice that whispers all his insecurities in his ear in the dead of night when no one is around to reassure him, the same voice that gave rise to all his fears and worries. It is the voice of the vulnerable and weak part of Izuki, the one that needs someone to guide him with a gentle hand, and he hates it.

It is a voice that, frankly, he never thought he would hear again. Yet, here it is, crying out for attention, screaming for someone to help.

He thought he had left it behind. It turns out he was wrong.

Izuki shoves it deep into his heart with more effort than he’s exerted all game, breathing a heavy sigh when he succeeds in locking it behind the glass wall that keeps his emotions away.

let’s hear it for “ceru is a masochist” exhibit 3~

chapter 13: nosedive

“I don’t know who you are,” Koganei completes his little speech, anger brimming in every part of his being. “But I know that my captain is Izuki Shun, not Akashi Seijūrō. The coach can bench you if she likes; we can fight without our captain, because we know he wants us to win for his sake. We’ve been fighting without him all the match, and we can continue doing so. We don’t need a player that can’t play with the same passion as us!”

Izuki looks at the ground and doesn’t respond. Somewhere within, something is stirring at Koganei’s words. Something that cries out to fill the gap inside him.

Next to speak is Kiyoshi, standing up and executing much the same move as Koga had by yanking Izuki up by his collar. However, Kiyoshi pulls Izuki into a standing position so that Izuki is half-leaning against him.

Brown eyes meet black, and Kiyoshi simply states, “I didn’t expect this from you, Shun.”

Then he rears his fist backwards and punches Izuki in the jaw.

“ceru is a masochist” exhibit 4!

chapter 14: bird of prey

“I just… I didn’t think you’d give up so easily.”

Koganei’s head shoots up. There’s fury in his eyes, and his face is white. His hands are shaking.

Izuki continues, calm and careless as he always is, “Really… after you gave me all that talk at halftime? I don’t believe this is you.”

Koganei’s jaw clenches, and he cries, “But I have done everything I can! He’s just too good—”

“And when has that ever stopped you?” Izuki keeps his voice quiet and even, but it has the gravity he intended it to - Koga falls silent immediately, eyes wide and riveted on him. “When have you ever backed down from fighting? You don’t know the meaning of giving up. You’ve never cared about whether someone’s better than you. I knew a shooting guard once, just like you, and he had the potential to be the greatest in the world. He was held back because he cared that he was worse than others. But you? You never blinked at it, just practised and practised until you could do the impossible.”

His words are getting louder with pride; he’s unable to keep it steady with the outpouring of emotion in his speech.

“Tell me, who can master Ray Allen’s form in one and a half years? Who can be such a rookie at basketball, yet be able to fight an Uncrowned King and respond to a shot that has left all its previous victims unable to move?!” Izuki leans forward and jabs a finger into Koganei’s chest demandingly. “Tell me, who the hell was that?!”

“Me,” Koga whispers timidly, looking down.

ahhhh yay for more platonic comfort and bonding. *izuki voice* yelling is the way to get ur team to get their shit tgt

chapter 15: born to soar

Izuki finds himself moving, barely thinking as he grabs the ball and bawls for an attack. He’s running faster than he ever has, flying up the court like there are wings on his legs. No one follows at his pace - they’re all too far behind.

No one but Kiyoshi.

The rhythm beats louder than ever, a heavy pulse in Izuki’s head and heart. He can feel Akashi on his heels and knows he needs to do something.

One second left—

Izuki’s hands move on their own, passing the ball to the one person he knows that he will always find.

Kiyoshi catches it and jumps.

Fortyfivethirtyfivetwentyfivefifteen—

The ball leaves his hands.

Fivezero—

The whistle blows to end the game. Kiyoshi’s shot hits the backboard and drops straight into the basket. Time stops as a shrill sound screeches into the air and the ref shouts, “124 to 123, Seirin High wins the Winter Cup!”

there we go. the most heartwrenching scene of this chapter ahhhhh

chapter 16: final flight

“We should go. Don’t want to keep them waiting too long,” Kiyoshi says, staring daggers at Hyūga, who to his credit doesn’t flinch but merely stares back.

“Let’s go, then,” Izuki agrees. He looks straight at Hyūga and allows a small, formal smile to play on his lips. Hyūga just nods, accepting the answer.

Izuki nods back, then turns around and starts walking away. But even as he moves toward the exit, something weighs heavily in his tired chest. For the first time in a long time, he isn’t confident in his decision.

Acting on impulse, he turns on his heel and yells out, “Call sometime, maybe!” before walking backwards out the door that Kiyoshi holds for him.

It’s an open-ended suggestion. Hyūga can choose to wallow and ignore it, or he can choose to pick up the phone. Izuki isn’t going to do so either way - he’ll be happy if Hyūga makes that call, but he won’t be terribly sad if he doesn't.

This time, he’s going to be the one that walks forward without looking back.

ahhh okay so this scene means a hella lot to me personally because... i had to grow, the way izuki grew. izuki’s now strong enough to sort of put the olive branch out and say, “take it or leave it,” and if it’s left he’s not gonna be upset. that’s something i really learned with a lot of difficulty and i think that that growth - in both me and him - is a lovely thing.

and there we have it! my favorite moments from each chapter of this story. *cries in a corner* god i can’t believe it’s over...

THANK YOU FOR THE JOURNEY!

#knb #izuki #eagles were born to soar #izuday #ceru writes

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sweetiejunie · 5 years ago

Text

This city

Summary: a late night drive with beomgyu

Genre: fluff, slight angst

Beomgyu x reader

Requested💕

=====================================

“Hello?” You spoke in a groggy voice, picking up the buzzing phone next to you.

“Hi babe! Were you sleeping again?”

“.... no....” you answered, hearing beomgyu chuckled on the other end.

“Okay then, since you’re awake, get ready, I’m picking you up in 15.”

“Wait, wha-”

“Love you, bye.”

With that, he hung up. Leaving you in a state of confusion. Checking your phone, the clock showed 11.23 pm. What could he possibly want at this hour?

You laid in your bed, contemplating your options. For one, you could get changed and get ready to meet beomgyu. On the other hand, you could just stay in bed and wait for him to let himself in. As tempting as the latter was, curiosity got the better of you and dragged you out of bed.

Not knowing any details, it was hard to choose an outift. Did you have to dress up? You had no idea where he was bringing you. After a few minutes of consideration, you decided on a simple oversized shirt and jeans, you sat on the couch waiting for a knock to come from the door.

As expected, no more than 5 minutes later, you heard your passcode being keyed and the door being pushed opened with beomgyu’s head poking through.

“Babe!” he called out, only to be cut off when he turned to see you already waiting for him, “oh, hey babe, i expected you to still be in bed. Come on let’s go.”

From his dressing, you figured he definitely wasn’t bringing you anywhere fancy, a plain shirt, layered with a bomber jacket and jeans.

Walking over to where you were seated, beomgyu leaned down and gave you a kiss. But there was an eerie feeling, something about it felt... off. Grabbing your hand, he dragged you out of your house and to his car.

His car wasn’t anything luxurious, but you didn’t mind. Through the years you had been together, this car contained countless memories. There was the time you two had accidentally spent the night in his car because neither of you wanted to drive. And also the time you somehow got locked in his car.

Beomgyu, being the gentleman he was, stopped at the passenger side and opened the car door for you. But before stepping in you had to know, “gyu, you still havent told me, so where we’re going?”

“Don’t worry about it, I’m sure you’ll love it. And i just really needed to see you right now.”

‘Needed’ A wave of worry crashed over you as that word echoed through your head. Beomgyu never used that word often. Usually, he would use want. Very semdom need. That’s when it hit you, something was wrong.

Stepping into his car, you wondered if your intuition was right. This time, you really hoped it wasn’t, it pained you seeing your, usually carefree and smiley, boy sad or hurt. Your mood reflected his own and if he was upset you wouldn’t hesitate to fight whoever or whatever caused it. You analysed his every move as he closed your door and went around to the driver’s side. Even if it was the smallest hint to what was wrong, you didnt want to miss it.

He got in the car, closed the door and fastened his safety belt. Looking at you through the corner of his eye, he chuckled before saying, “what is it? You’ve been watching me.”

“Are you alright?”

Hearing the concern in your voice he turned to face you, placing a hand on your cheek, “of course, why would i be?”

You studied his face. His words said one thing but his expression said another. There was a sadness in his eyes, but you didn’t want to pry. When he was ready he would tell you. And even if he didn’t, you would still be by him no matter what. You hummed a response. And with that, beomgyu grabbed the steering wheel and step on the gas, driving off.

The drive was quiet, beomgyu kept his eyes on the road while you looked out the window, only peeking at him every so often. He looked ethereal, driving with one hand as his other laid on the arm rest. The streets lights illuminating his features as he drove past each one. Sensing your stare, he glanced over to you, only causing you to get flustered and look away. He let out a small laugh and grabbed your hand with his free one, holding it for the rest of the ride.

You watched the number of street lights decrease as beomgyu approached an upward hill.

“Where are we?” You questioned.

“We’re almost there,” he replied, holding your hand tighter for reassurance.

After another 5 minutes, beomgyu stopped the car and stepped out. Once again going over to your side, opening the door and offered you a hand which you gladly accepted. A chivalrous move, one of the many reasons you loved him.

You hopped out of the car and realised he had brought you to a cliff that overlooked the city. The majestic view of the skyline appeared with startling beauty. There wasn’t a cloud in the star-speckled sky. A half-moon hovered at the fringes of the luminous cityscape, where the red blinking lights of distance radio towers twinkling in the night. There were no trees or city planted blooms, just monoliths of concrete soaring out of the sidewalk in an exact grid pattern. At night it was beautiful in it's own way, so many lights.

You couldn’t help but stare, mouth left slightly agape as you took in the breathtaking view infront of you. Meanwhile, beomgyu was busy taking in a different view, to him, just as beautiful and amazing, you. He loved how the area around you lit up when you were happy or excited. Your mere presence alone enough to light up an entire room.

Flashing him a smile and a light giggle, you wrapped your arms around his neck and held him close. “How did you find this place?”

“Hmm, i just suddenly remembered how much i loved this place when i was younger and figured ill bring you here too,” he replied, trying to return the smile. But you knew him better than that, you knew that behind the smile there was still something on his mind.

“Come on.”

With that, he snaked an arm around your waist, leading you to a bench that sat underneath a tree, a single street light used to light up the entire place. The entire scene seemed to come straight out of your favourite romance movie. To be completely honest, you would be surprised if out of the blue, beomgyu broke into song.

There was absolutely no one else there. To think such a beautiful site would be filled with people, but i guess not. It was a secluded place and you were pretty glad that you and beomgyu could enjoy this alone. Just you, him, the night sky and the city lights. How could it get any better?

You both sat in silence for a little while. Beomgyu had his arm around you as you laid on his shoulder. He even wrapped you up in his jacket, knowing you forgot to bring your own. It wasn’t a particularly chilly night, but he still didn’t want to risk the possibility of you catching a cold. In that moment, everything felt perfect. But there was still a nagging feeling at the back of your head.

You sat up to look beomgyu in the eyes and asked, “gyu, are you really alright? Something’s been feeling off the entire night. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but im just worried. And you know you can tell me anything right?”

He sighed, a small smile tugged at his lips. “I really can’t hide anything from you, can i?” He stated, holding you tighter, resting his head on yours.

“Well,” he started, “i guess these few months of living in this city, away from my family, is just starting to get a bit lonely and overwhelming. I’m here chasing my dreams. But i just feel like the more i give my heart to this city, one day, she’s just going to break it.”

You listened as beomgyu poured his heart out to you. You had no idea he left like this and it hurt you to the core. You felt horrible for not noticing sooner.

“Right now, this city’s got me chasing stars. She loves me now. But what if one day she decides to leave? It terrifies me to think i dont belong here anymore.”

You felt tears well up in your eyes as he spoke. It broke your heart to hear him say that.

“Gyu,” you spoke, lightly tapping his head so he would sit up.

You looked him in the eyes, “dont say that. You do belong here. And if you ever feel alone, dont. You have the boys and me. Ill never leave you. I love more than anything, you know that right?”

He nodded slightly, eye studying yours as you continued, “behind the dazzle of the city’s façade there existed this outpost of hell but Ill be right by your side. And if the city ever breaks your heart, ill be right here to pick it up.”

By this point a tear had rolled down your cheek, only to be swipped away by beomgyu’s thumb as he gently carassed your face. You pulled beomgyu into a hug while you snuggled into his chest. You stayed like this. Hearing the calm beating of his heart that matched your own. Your arms around him and his around you. Even though there was negatives about living in the busy city, you still loved it. Solely for the reason that this city brought him to you, the love of your life.

=====================================

Took me a while to write this cause i have like 5 other ideas drafted out :’) hope you like this!!

#beomgyu au #txt #txt fluff #txt ff #txt fanfic #txt imagine #txt au #txt post #beomgyu fanfic #beomgyu ff #beomgyu fluff #beomgyu imagines #choi beomgyu #txt beomgyu

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husbandograveyard · 4 years ago

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Hewwo Hazel uwu 🔫😀👾😭😜😳⏰😏🎆💓?

Hewwo Bas! The UwU is strong today o(>ω<)o Thank you for your questions!

🔫 - Fave canon arc?

Thriller Bark. It made me laugh SO HARD. One piece is one of the few anime that genuinely makes me laugh out loud, usually im more of a “hmpft” blowing air out of my nose laught kinda gal, but one piece gave me a lot of joy and laughter, and mostly during thriller bark. Besides that, the fights and the general plot thickening and things coming together, and Zoro’s sacrifice all made this one of my top favorite archs! The pacing was very good as well, compared to, for example, Dressrosa.

😀 - Most favorite Straw Hat?

aaaaaa don’t make me choose This is very hard! The initial thought was Zoro because well it’s Zoro and most of his lines never fail to make me laugh. Robin is the one I admire most cause it’s the kind of lady idk if I wanna be her or be with her yknow? And Chopper also popped up because well.. he’s the absolute most adorable bean and I love him and his cuteness.

I’m gonna conclude a tie between Zoro and Robin, and Chopper can be on their shoulders being adorable? (´･ᴗ･ ` )

👾 - Fave villain?

Perona as far as she was an actual villain, her negative spooks are the best attack ever and no one can tell me otherwise.

In terms of bigger antagonists, probably the Charlotte family? I’m counting them as one, just for now, since they are all super interesting and I like seeing them on screen more than ceasar or moria or doffy and 100000x more than friggin Blackbeard (Imagine me using the ‘dinkleberg voice’ whenever I say blackbeard). Doffy is a good villain. But he makes me too mad so he only gets a flaminglemention and not the top spot ha.

😭 - Saddest scene?

Just like one piece is the series that made me laugh he most, it’s also the one that made me cry the most. Almost embarrassingly much. I ugly sobbed for a few hours straight around Ace’s death. I was spoiled, I knew it was gonna happen, but I did not know how exactly, so ehm from impel down on, every scene they showed him I teared up at least. (oops). BUT there was one other scene that made me cry a lot that I have to mention because I did not expect to cry for that moment. I knew about the time skip, I knew about the training, I knew they were gonna take some time off to get stronger. BUT I did not know how and when and the circumstances. The moment Kuma separated them, the agony and the helplessness. My heart. I could not take it. That was too sad.

Honorable mentions for the Bellemere scene very early on and saying goodbye to merry. Just too many heartbreaking moments but I feel that’s what makes the series so nice, you need to get hurt sometimes in order to get more attached to characters.

😜 - Funniest character?

Ehm. In terms of delivering hilarious one-liners and making me laugh while not actually being funny on purpose: Zoro. The dumb is too much and is hilarious. He says funny things while not being funny and there’s just too many peak comedy moments in him getting lost or ‘wanting to get made into a wax statue in this pose”.

Luffy gets a mention in situational humor too because that dumbassery is hilarious as well.

Other than that. Probably a tie between Usopp and Franky. It’s just so stupid, but the sheer simpleness of most of the humor makes it so easy to digest and look at!

😳 - Any crushes?

Any? Many! ehm, to not make this answer a couple thousand words long, quickfire! Ace, he has the charisma, the feralness, the politeness and the freckles. Shanks, he’s just the sweetest, sexiest mystery man who knows what his priorities are. Sabo, all the feralness, less of the politeness, all of the cuteness. His smile can revive puppies. Zoro: the Dumbassery, the muscles, the brutal honesty and that soff soff mossy hair. Kid: again, the dumbassery, the rudeness while still caring for his bunch of misfits. I love me a good tulip. Robin: The beauty, the grace, the humor, the fashion, the intellect. Again, dk if i want to be her or be with her. Vivi: The courage, the love, the sweetness amongst the badassery, step on me princess. Honorable mentions for Killer, A bunch of people showing up in Wano that I’ve only seen spoilers pop up for. And writing some character has had me reconsidering all the crushes all together. In conclusion: WHY IS EVERYONE IN ONE PIECE SO ATTRACTIVE??? safe for you Blackbeard honey, you could fall off a cliff and I’d applaud.

⏰ - How long have you been into One Piece?

Not that long at all. When I was 14? ish I started my anime journey. I watched 15-20? episodes of One Piece and hated it. Around that time one piece was somewhere in between 500-600 eps and I could not imagine ever catching up to that, especially since my strict parents limited my computer use to 3h a week.

Then a friend really got into it I think about 5? years ago and kept talking about it and how it was actually good. I was starting to do an effort to watch all the ‘big’ and ‘must-see’ anime and promised myself I’d watch One Piece, eventually.

Then this year at the end of October 2019 I actually started watching it. I had grown up a lot, and could now appreciate the anime way more for what it was? I fell in love and binged the entire thing in more or less six months with some small breaks in between for work, school, books, and other anime. Highly considering re-downloading so I can rewatch my favorite parts soon. My biggest problem is that once I love something, I go ALL IN and I will love everything about it and obsess. And thus this Tumblr was created as the hiatus started and I wanted something One Piece to keep me distracted. I eventually want to collect the manga but I now don’t have the space for it in my tiny room.

😏 - Favorite scene?

Sabo and Luffy reuniting! The reveal, the tears, the hug, and the ridiculousness of Luffy with the beard and all, just made it perfect. Absolutely loved it.

OH and Luffy punching the celestial dragon. The absolute energy in that scene made me grin like an idiot yet gave me goosebumps. Punch those slave-owning bitches luffy, thank you!

🎆 - Something you can’t wait for??!!

ALL of what is to come in Wano. I’ve been catching spoilers here and there and i just cannot wait! There’s gonna be so much reveals and new characters and comebacks and all the things I did not know I need in my life.

And I would like some more reveals on Shanks and his crew since we literally know next to nothing about them, besides the fact that even the admirals seemed to be at least wary of their powers and I just really need to know. (or not, since mystery adds to the charm).

I can’t wait for the abolishment of the government and the death/defeat of blackbeard (assuming that will happen at some point, a girl can dream).

💓 - Which character do you relate to the most?

SO HARD. Hardest question. Ehm... Ace and Usopp I think? I struggle with family a lot, but I have a chosen family that I wouldn’t trade for the world. I am hella insecure, but I try my best most of the time and I am extremely loyal, even though I have no particular talents, I try and help here and there and hopefully can make some people happy that way!

If you read all the way through here, thank you for coming to my Ted talk! It was so long („• ֊ •„) but it was also so much fun (ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ

#one piece #one piece ask #ask me anything #get to know hazel #proof that i talk to much #hazel actually rambles a lot #put me in front of a crowd with only a note one piece on it and ill talk for hours #even if the audience doesnt want to hear it #CAN I INTRODUCE YOU TO OUR LORD AND SAVIOR MR MONKEY D LUFF YALL?#Here is law he has no ass but all the regret #anyhow rambling even in these tags that no one reads oop #basilisa-scorpii

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a-forgotten-spirit · 5 years ago

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Azriel x Reader

Credit to Artists.

Author Note: I’m sorry I'm slow at writing. I’m thinking of doing an Amren x Wendigo reader, anyone interested? You can find all chapters tagged under ‘lovers of shadow’. Also if any single one of you need something feel free to send me a message!

Tags: @alphaomegahybrid @cookiemonsterwholovesbooks @livlaughlove20 @klashmafia @tiasbandom @shane-knight @ourbooksuniverse @warning-fangirl-at-work @xxpapasfritasxx @shadowsingersxks @-im-fantastic- @kenzie-cold-greenkale @great-goddess-of-sin @judig92 @pugzzzz @mariamuses @salma-mohammad54

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Chapter 8

Y/N P.O.V Walking to the area where there was space I stretched my arms over my head and gazed over to see Cassian watching my movements. A couple of the other warriors came to watch the fight after all Cassian is the Commander and needs seven siphons making him the top dog weather the other Illyrians like it or not. I can't stand how the others act it’s disgusting.

Twirling the knife in my hand the metal feeling cool against my skin, my nails made a clicking sound while I drummed them against the metal. Watching his muscles flex with each movement my eyes tracking them.

Fighting did something to the brain, making it more alert and focused. Some couldn't leave that state once submerged, I was one of them. I never stopped fighting whether it be a physical fight or a mental one, I never stopped. I did try, I honestly did but growing up to be a ruler it felt as though it was woven into my genetics. My first war was brutal and I lost many friends, I was never quite the same after that and even I noticed. I changed little by little every day on the battlefield. I would maim and kill with no remorse or guilt, I don't think those closest to me ever got over that. The way war changed me. I tried to stay out of fighting and war after that but I couldn't, taking a toll on my mind and body I worry one day I won't be able to come back.

"Are we fighting or what" Cassian smirked and my eyes narrowed in on him, it was an addiction. One I lusted after, feeling skin beneath my fingers of a foe. I craved this.

My body moved with no hesitation getting to his form and sending a closed fist directly into this sternum. Hearing the gasp of breath come from his mouth but originating from his lungs. Recovering quickly a fist came at me sending my body into a backward flip ending only a few meters away. Circling each other slowly small piece of dirt crunched beneath my shoe. Swinging the knife between my fingers I watched him. The way his wings fluttered and muscles flexed. I monitored each millimetre of movement. His body came hurtling for my own a closed fist wanting to hit my face. My hand raised to catch his fist and with a few gasps from the crowd and a wide eyes shocked expression from Cassian. I flipped him on his back hitting the ground with a thud.

I looked down at him but I only then noticed it was hazy. My vision was not clear or that I could see, no it was hazy and uneven. I could make out the figures but not the details. Slowly they cleared and I was dizzy for only a second, shaking my head and looking to Cassian who was looking at me in worry and concern. He got up from the ground and I could hear muffled words, one of the warriors watching and him.

"Y/N look at me, what happened. What's wrong" I could only just make out Cassian's words, it was as though I was underwater. I watched him walk closer and seem to give me a once over to look for visual injuries.

I stood for a moment hearing the whispers of my people "They are coming" I whispered and I threw myself over Cassian as I felt the ground shake, I felt something fly past me and called out “Get the others. Now” within a few seconds, I could feel the shadows around me.

The ground shook again and I fell Cassian catching me as I did. It was forceful and shook the camp, Illyrians were running around collecting weapons and other devices. Flying into the air and calling out that they were firing things at us. No one was hurt so far and I rushed down the bond seeing Azriel was all right. Grabbing Cassian’s hand I dragged him to where the others were my men guiding me through the least destructive path. Getting to the others I let go of Cassian’s hand and yelled “What are they firing”

“They are using the Cauldron to boost the power of large boulders” Rhysand called out “The fight begins now” with that his wings spread and he flew into the air Cassian and Azriel the following suit. I saw Mor and turned to her.

“Watch Feyre I’ll watch the boys” with a nod from her and I grabbed Amren’s hand “You’re with me” she nodded as we ran hand and hand through the forest. Once out the fight was loud and destructive, a sword came from the ground and I handed it to Amren getting my own. “I’ll watch your back you watch mine” she nodded and we began to fight. She wasn’t in the best fighting clothes but we will make do with what we have. I trusted her with my life and she did I.

Going straight forward I sliced hunters and watched as some got dragged into the depths of the Earth shadows draping the field if an inkpot had fallen over. Shadows grabbing Illyrians and pulling them to the sides to not get hit, it was indeed an eventful fight. We were winning losing some of the Illyrians but still winning nonetheless, a few casualties were to be expected. Shadows jumped from the ground but what I saw was not what I was expecting as I see one get cut and fall his skin returning to one of a flesh body and my falling my eyes wide at the scene.

“Amren they knew my people would be here” I whispered my voice shaking as I stood still soldiers moving around me. She saw it too as did a few others so with a growl and my body sprinting I began to run through the hunters as though they were merely butter, how dare they hurt my people. It wasn’t long until the Hunters and Hybern began to flee I was watching them my breathing heavy, eyes narrowed and my sword drenched in the crimson liquid of their fallen.

I stood in front of everyone my body shaking as the bodies of my people were brought to me, thirteen in total, my family, my children. I dropped to my knees in front of them and covered my mouth. My people gone, thirteen taken from this world because I thought they would be fine because I didn’t predict the consequences. Their blood is on my hands, I could hear the chatter behind me and then someone dropped beside me.

“We will get revenge little shadow�� Amren whispered and hugged my side, I saw my people bodies laid out in front of me some eyes were still open, blood dripping from their gashes. I stood Amren letting go and I walked forward as my people rose from the ground turning into their human forms, no one spoke as I kneeled and sighed out trying not to let my sadness fall down my face.

“How” one whispered as I kneeled to a young woman inspecting her gash, I ran my hand over the wound and hissed pulling my hand back.

“Jutyius Flower” I whispered and looked to my bodyguards in shock, “I thought it died out over a thousand years ago” I looked to these thirteen people their lives taken from something of a myth, no longer folklore.

“It is” I heard I didn’t know who, my mind was running a hundred miles an hour and I turned to Amren who was older than anyone here looking to her for an answer.

“He has the Cauldron but no one should know you exist unless there is a spy of sorts” her eyes narrowed the smoke seeming to move faster in swirls like ocean waves crashing against the rocks of a cliff. “He must have made some, you only need one, coat your weapons and your army fall” she whispered and I turned to my people.

“We will send them” I breathe my eyes beginning to water. “Send them off as they wished. We all loved them and now we will see them off. Let them float in the depths” I whispered and stood. I looked back seeing the boys and their looks of fear as I looked to my people. “Boys can I please have the way” I whispered but I knew they heard me. Within a second they were in the air a shadow cast over and I breathed out.

I never thought I would have to do this to one of my own but if the time came I would do this to the boys they had asked me too after I showed them the place. I raised my hands the bodies floating into the air as my people circled and then we fell into the ground. We carried them flying through the abyss of darkness. I heard cries and whimpers as we did, we flew until everyone had stopped crying it was hours and then we reached the depths. Looking back we pushed them off as they sunk their bodies being engulfed by the abyss. We stood everyone swirling around the depths and then with a sigh and a wave of my hand we left going back to the Illyrian camp. I rose from the ground my eyes close to crying. I walked into the tent pushing the flaps open and I walked in seeing Amren sitting with Varian on his lap, Amren jumped up running to me and throwing her arms around my neck and bringing my body as close to hers as she could, I broke down all my feeling becoming too much for me to handle.

I couldn’t breathe I lost my people, it may have only been a few but it was enough to fracture my whole life. My body was shaking as I cried my crying turns into sobbing, Amren kept me in her arms as I stood there all my emotions falling into the Earth. I don’t think I hadn’t cried like this since Azriel since he left. This was all too much for my heart to take. Thirteen people I let die, thirteen people, I could’ve saved if I wasn’t reckless, thirteen people I let fall. Thirteen of my people, of my family.

“Shhh love it’s ok” she whispered and hugged me tighter. “They are safe. I can feel it” I knew what she is, her true self. I knew everything about her and she had seen my worst self. Amren came to visit me and I loved her with all my soul her visits stopped because she couldn't bear seeing me the way I was when Azriel had left.

“How. I thought it was extinct” I whispered and hugged her tighter. Her small frame hugging my chest as I sat my head on her own.

“There is someone here giving information, who I do not know. The boys are going to find them” she moved to grab my face in her hands “Y/N” she paused her eyes swirling with locked power “I can feel they are safe and happy” I nodded and let her go as she did I.

I looked up and shook my head “I apologise, Varian, this isn’t my best look” I tried to smile but it came up short.

“No need to apologise. Amren was worried for you so we waited” His smile reached his eyes. I was glad Amren had found Varian she deserved happiness, she was amazing.

“What are the plans” I looked back to Amren her eyes falling once I met her own. “I'm not too sure. It was a shock and we lost quite a few we will need to re-think our strategies and then attack or plan for another assault” her voice was always so mystical, as though magic swirled in her words dripping in power and hidden feeling of revenge. “We will make them fall. I promise” her eyes narrowed and I nodded in agreement.

“Are the boys hurt I didn’t even think to check” letting the air from my lungs I breathed out my hand raising and running through my hair, they were alive and they were standing so nothing serious if anything at all.

“A few scratches and a little slice to a wing bone but nothing dramatic” I nodded and breathed out. “They will be fine. Will you” she asked leaning forward and grabbing my hands in her own.

“No” I whispered honestly. Shaking my head as I felt the tears well up again I pushed my emotions back and breathed my eyes moving to the floor “No I will not. I didn’t plan for this and I should have”

“You could not have known” she sighed and gripped my hands “It is good to see you again Y/N. Your people are now safe and the thirteen that passed are safe and happy they died protecting you and the people you care about” she smiled and I nodded knowing she knew more about death then I.

I nodded once more. We sat down and spoke for a while until the boys came back and told me the news they couldn’t find who it was, all I could do was a nod as I sat on the bed next to Amren and across from the boys. I loved them all so dear. I couldn’t live with myself if any of them were to get hurt.

I didn’t eat that night, I couldn’t bring myself too and with a smile to them, I made my way back into my home, looking around I got undressed and had a shower. I needed to wash the grime and disgust for myself off of me, I had scrubbed my skin until it was red. You couldn’t tell if you cried while having a shower. Once done I sighed, dried and got dressed going to bed with Azriel behind me cuddling into my back. I didn’t sleep, I couldn’t his breathing was slow and even he had fallen asleep as I laid in place looking to the window across from me and flashes of the deads faces rang in my head though Amren’s words did comfort me to no end. I was glad for her and I loved her more than anything for allowing me to know they were safe and happy.

The morning came and I left the bed dressing and walking out with a smile to a still sleeping Azriel, I didn’t make it far. I looked to see Cassian who looked to me, I shook my head knowing his questions and made my way to the food area. Grabbing a slice of bread I picked at it as I walked around and in the end threw the leftover bread into a nearby bush for the animals to have. While I was walking my mind wandered and I started to panic. I couldn’t breathe, so I ran.

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Chapter 9

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ad1thi · 6 years ago

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avengers endgame

this film ruined me

don’t get me wrong

i loved the film

but it ruined me

i don’t know how to function in a world where tony stark is gone

i genuinely don’t

i’m not ready for a marvel cinematic universe where he isn’t there anymore

but i just

i needed somewhere to write down how i feel about this film

so here it is:

(spoilers under the cut)

(sorry guys i couldn’t help myself)

thoughts about the film in (mostly) chronological order:

i said this ages ago and it was very satisfying that carol saved tony. and i love tony and nebula’s soft friendship so much and i wish we could’ve seen more of it

the naked happiness and surprise on nebula’s face when tony says that she won makes me cry so much, because she’s so used to always losing and here is this man who she’s never met before who is completely okay w her winning (her own sister wasn’t okay w her winning)

i love that carol saved tony, but i hate that rhodey wasn’t the first person to get to tony. don’t get me wrong- my stevetony heart jumped out when steve ran up to him and wrapped his arms around him, but a huge visceral part of me wishes that it had been rhodey

i hated seeing tony that thin. i know that it was necessary and it fits, but it broke my heart

i loved the continuity of this film. tony has been saying for years that there’s a bigger threat out there and they all dismissed him as paranoid and now this bigger threat came and killed half the universe and tony? tony almost died in space. the anger and pain in that scene, the way he singles out steve and thrusts the arc reactor on him before collapsing, that scene gives me vindictive pleasure

i also really appreciate clint’s arc in this. i feel like a rogue merc assassin who singles out mobsters that survived the snap that claimed his family is very in character for him

scott and cassie’s reunion made my heart soar

and i should say; this film is the first avengers film where the characters give tony the respect he deserves

the fact that they first turn to tony for help; the fact that neither steve nor natasha try to pressure him or manipulate him into helping; the fact that steve trusts his plan almost immediately; thats the deference tony deserved from film 1 and i’m glad he finally got it

this film gave steve a personality- yall have no idea how long i’ve waited for steve rogers to have a personality. this is the first film where we see steve rogers instead of captain america(TM) and it makes me sad that its taken that long

THOR’S BEER BELLY IS EVERYTHING. that is how normal people (and asgardians apparently) mourn

but i have to say, this film didn’t acknowledge loki at all and i think thats so shitty given that ragnorak paved for their relationship

i wish there had been some acknowledgment that thor was mourning loki as well

like him stopping in front of loki’s prison for a second, or him mentioning his brother in passing

this film found me asgardian family trope baited and i don’t appreciate that

i wish we’d had more rhodey&nebula scenes and more tony&nebula scenes, but i am happy with what i had

i have to say though, the film script was very well done everything tied together really well and nothing seemed particularly forced or out of place

NATASHA DYING THOUGH

that

that broke me

i mean, it makes sense, since natasha and tony were the first 2 avengers introduced to the mcu and so they should be the ones to die (in this house we don’t acknowledge the incredible hulk as a film) but that still took me by surprise

i wish they’d done it differently though

i wish clint and natasha hadn’t fought, i wish that clint would’ve walked with her to the end of the cliff, held her close and then just let go

i feel like the fight cheapened it, and tried to add this shock effect that just didn’t exist

clint has a family, i always knew it was going to be natasha

steve, tony, thor- i was prepared fo; but natasha blindsided me

speaking of steve and tony

there were so many stevetony moments in this film?

tony yelling at steve after he comes back from space

tony quipping w steve 5 years later “i miss that giddy optimism”

steve appreciating that tony is risking his daughter’s life for this hell mission- and acknowledging that

“do you trust me?” “i do”

ALSO TONY SPENDS HIS TIME STARING AT STEVE’S ASS i gotta say when you’re staring at another fella’s ass it means you’re gay them’s the rules

BEFORE I FORGET

THAT SCENE WITH HOWARD

im in 2 minds about it

because

don’t get me wrong; i hate howard stark

but this is about tony

and i think there’s something very cathartic about the fact that tony got to see his dad as the person people said he was, instead of the man who abused him all his life

and idk i feel like he needed that

i’ve gotta be honest though, i feel robbed of an edwin jarvis and tony scene. edwin jarvis was the man that raised tony, not howard- and i so wish he could’ve gotten a chance to talk to the man one last time

one of the biggest losses in the MCU is when tony loves JARVIS, the AI that’s been with him through everything; and i genuinely feel like it would’ve been more appropriate for him to talk to Edwin rather than H*ward

the irondad and spiderson feels jumped out in this film too

i genuinely believe that this film was the penultimate in tony’s arc; because everybody else is fighting for the casualties they can’t see but tony is fighting the casualty he did see

tony stark is fighting for peter parker and peter parker alone and you can not change my mind

everybody else is avenging the world, tony stark is avenging his son

which is why i adore that scene in the final battle where tony cuts peter off mid sentence to give him a hug and i just -

tony stark’s death ruined me

it genuinely broke my heart

and i think its very “full circle” that he says ‘i am iron man’ and that rhodey is the first person to reach him after he uses the stones, that pepper says “its okay we’ll be okay you can rest now”

that line is so important because tony was fighting for them. for his spiderkid, for his wife, for his bestfriend, and he can rest knowing that he saved their lives

speaking of the final battle though, i genuinely don’t appreciate the implication that steve is worthy enough to wield Mjolnir

idk

something about that rubs me wrong

and as much as i love steve’s ending scene and the fact that the shield goes to sam (bucky letting sam go see old!steve?? that moment between them?? i love that) i genuinely believe that the film should’ve ended with tony’s funeral

i do not appreciate that wendy bitchimoff got her own scene because i do not appreciate wendy bitchimoff

that should’ve been clint and steve; because natasha and steve’s friendship is literally one of the only good things to come out of steve’s arc in the mcu

anyway

the film should’ve ended with morgan asking for cheeseburgers

because this mcu belongs to tony stark

and this film is the only avengers film where tony is given his due

and it is only the film where he dies

so excuse me

while i go cry

#avengers endgame #avengers 4 #adi rants #avengers: endgame spoilers #avengers: endgame reactions #adi analyses #adi sobs #her fkn heart out

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sailorswelcome · 6 years ago

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WOWZA

tagged by @hi-im-eilidh thanks mom ur the loml and i would Absolutely die for you. also in writing this i just discovered grammarly has a tumblr extension. hmmmm.

what’s the smell of your shampoo?

I wash my hair..... like once every two weeks? bc i have so little of it and it doesn't need to be washed ever. the shampoo i keep at school is rosemary and the stuff i have at home is lemon, but it took so much effort to remember this bc i just never wash my hair bc im disgusting.

what’s your aesthetic?

luckily for me i have a pinterest board called aesthetic with 2.6k pins so i have a VERY clear idea for this. lumberjack shit, “the north” in general; ice and woods and glaciers and mountains and stuff. museums and classical things; art history and rome and greece bc thats just my shit. coffee shops, pretentious looking people smoking cigarettes, warm socks, log cabins, standing in the snow, words written in paintbrush over photos of landscapes, the moon, the sea, the desert.

what’s your favorite time of the day and why?

between 2 and 3 am bc i am horrible at sleeping. the light is always very beautiful then no matter where you are idk why. it is nice to look out the window then or take a walk or sit in the hall when everyone else on your floor is asleep. its just always very quiet and beautiful.

what do you most like about the beach?

GOOOOOOOD I LOVE THE BEACH uhhhhhh hgngngngngn i like it at night and in the winter and i like to look at it from on top of a cliff bc i love the way you can see every dip and sandbar because the color of the water changes... i love when its really clear in the early spring and you can see the seals after they dive underwater. I love the beach at night and swimming at night and the moon's reflection on the water and i love when it gets REALLY cold some winters and parts of the harbor will actually freeze and you get these huge chunks of ice washing up. I love when big chunks of driftwood wash up and you can use them as benches. I love the beach a lot can u tell.

what do you worry about constantly?

dark question op! i worry about Everything but mostly that I’ll never be happy, and that i’m annoying and a bad friend. everything else is just stemming from that.

what is a song you’ve cried to before?

i’ve cried to almost every single song i know but the number one hard hitters are I Need My Girl by The National, Lakeside View Apartments Suite by The Mountain Goats, and I’d Rather Be With Them by Marika Hackman. Those last two are both hit me with their lines about being really sad and throwing up which is just a trope that gets me I guess. oofa.

what are some relaxing tips for your followers?

i have never once in my life been relaxed but i would say mixing up the ways that you relax? having a really consistent routine to relax has never worked for me bc it stops working after a while and i just autopilot through it. talk to a friend, play some music, draw, go for a walk, take a nap on the floor instead of your bed, take a bath. journal, drink some water, eat something. try something new every time depending on what is stressing you out. go with the flow dudes.

what are some things that make you tear up?

like. all music as i said i have cried at Every song. also a lot of movies make me tear up. idk this is a bad question bc i just start crying sometimes for no reason i think my eyes just do that. i was hanging out with a friend one time and my eyes just started leaking and he was like hey whats wrong? and i was like no idea! its a mystery to us both

what is your favorite from each sense?

sight - sunlight falling on the floor through windows

smell - hey this is going to sound so weird but im OBSESSED with the smell of the chemicals they put in air conditioners and freezers. its my favorite smell in the world. i dont know why i just smell a refrigerator and nut

taste - this is honestly the first thing i could think of but on christmas eve i was at @hi-im-eilidh ‘s house and her mom made biscuits and like holy shit

sound - catholic boys choir hitting a high note in a big cathedral

touch - holding hands im gay

what is an alternative reality you’ll like to live in?

noir detective novel where i am very cool and i have 20/20 vision and a gun and i can monologue

what are some troubles you face on a daily basis?

i am always stressed and lonely and i have no money for gas as i drive a pickup truck. also my friends who i love dearly always SPILL FOOD IN MY CAR, AND DONT PICK IT UP, IS THIS YOUR FUCKING BEDROOM I DONT THINK SO CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF GGOD

what is one scene from a book that makes you really sad?

there is this post-apocalyptic book called After The Snow and i don't remember much of it but i know the protagonist was this boy and he had a cave full of animal skulls that he like worshipped and talked to and i just remember that made me really sad bc everyone thought he was weird for having any sort of remaining spirituality after the world had ended but like god he was doing so well it made me big sad

say something to your followers:

sorry this post was so fuckign long and depressing! i promise i am usually not this sad! these are just cursed questions. also hey... i love u all.. thanks for putting up with me

im tagging @brushite bc i love her and want her to suffer thru answering these

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sigurdjarlson · 8 years ago

Text

Replies! Woo! super late i know

highpriestessbriyanna said: This is always my reaction. Like “yes. keep talking. Wait.. did you just PUN at me again.. IMA KNIOCK THAT FUCKER OFF A CLIFF”

IM 99.9% sure someone has knocked khadgar off a cliff before and there’s an 80% chance it was because of a pun

owmyeyeballs said: You ok, friendbeast?

just tired and in a bit of a slump but i’ll be okay. thank you <3

owmyeyeballs said: Know that feel…

my poor girl! hasn’t she been through enough.. (*evil brain sounds*)

skullkind said: congrats!

Thank you!! It was the shitty demon hunter boots but it’s better than nothin!

lovesdaryl said: Feel better soon. *hugs*

thank you <3 *hugs*

skullkind said: me with illidan like once a week

same tbh

casterlycosplay said: Very relatable content

i wish i could say its the first time i’ve teared up while thinking about khadgar..but its not

apaladinfailure said: this is the most relatable thing you’ve ever posted

Khadgar..such a tearjerker huheuheuh he cries while he wanks

anzareveange said: im giving him all my love.

same. i want blizz to let me hug him so bad like PLEASE

skullkind said: hey !! im skull and ive been following you for a while and think youre super chill! i llove ur wow posting ! you dont need to follow back but i would love to chat sometime or stuff ^^

hello!!1 :D thank you for following. I’m glad you enjoy them. Feel free to contact me anytime! I’d love to chat

shadowphoenixrider said: Yeah, I remember her sneaking around the Twilight Highlands in Cata.

That sounds like her <3

ship-garbage-pile said: ^^ yeah she’s one of the quest givers order hall

I need to level my rogue..

lovesdaryl said: I might have mentioned this, but we went to ZG before it was patched out and I actually won the tiger and gave it to my husband as a gift. He looks magnificent on it. :-)

this is honestly the sweetest thing ever

anzareveange said: sleeping with the enemy…

Khadgar and Gul’dan have some serious unresolved sexual tension lbr

owmyeyeballs said: I love reading your responses to these. Thanks for putting up with my nonsense! XD

I love answering them <3

a-little-squirrely-sunshine said: My cat is named David Bowie, and depending on how I phrase things I get the best odd looks from my friends.

That’s great like i cna just imagine..DAVID BOWIE WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN YOUR MOUTH sdkgkdfh

owmyeyeballs said: These two just keep on breaking my heart…

they break mine too ugh. My poor babies

shadowphoenixrider said: I’d vote, but I like quite a few and I don’t think they’d all fit in this text box. I might…steal one idea though.

Steal as many as you’d like and I’d still love to hear which ones you think i should write!

doitsuki said: yes genn is lower in the hierarchy

he’s..the omega

ghoulghoulneighbor said: But they said no homo while they did it……….

blizzard could make a cinemeatic where khadgar and medivh have explicit sex and they’d still be like.. “no homo tho”

shadowphoenixrider said: Eggs-llecent idea, Archmage.

BLOCKED

anzareveange said: take all my dollars blizzard! hire him for the movie!

I won’t accept anyone else as old khadgar now. Someone get me into contact with George

owmyeyeballs said: i love them!!!!

My fierce saber queens <3

apaladinfailure said: omg that it so sweet im crying

i cried a lil while writing it so don’t feel bad hehheh

owmyeyeballs said: Oh dear lord, that was adorable and sad… someone protect these sweethearts!

protect Khadgar and Jaina 2k17

shadowphoenixrider said: Ow my heart! If you’ll excuse me, I’ll just lie down…right here…

i had to do the same after writing it tbh

owmyeyeballs said: Sweet, precious babies!

i just want to hold them both

shadowphoenixrider said: *chinhands* These are lovely, you know.

thank you so much!!

shadowphoenixrider said: I’m not quite sure my heart should be hurting this much in the morning, but it is!

Hohoho there’s a lot more where that came from!

ghoulghoulneighbor said: How dare u. This is some 10/10 pain, would cry again.

Same tbh. I made their parents and I was like shit..i love them

ghoulghoulneighbor said: I knew Illidan was the daddy kink type, I just knew it

YOU ARE NOT PREPARED...FOR ILLIDADDY’S DICK

ghoulghoulneighbor said: what have I started.

*points at medivh* Medaddy.

*points at Gul’dan* Gul’daddy

anzareveange said: Many races dont have orphans or child models. i want to see a tauren child, or a dwarf or a gnome child.

there are nightborne children models so blizz really doesn’t have an excuse anymore. I want children models for all the races, blizz. Give me this now

shadowphoenixrider said: I’d like to inform you that Khadgar is introduced in the book Tides of Darkness with a youngster in one arm and holding the hand of another. We don’t call him Dadgar for nothing! ^^

OH NO!!! This is so sweet I really need to read Tides of Darkness...and Beyond the Dark Portal

anzareveange said: “Put that thing back where it came from” no, it can be really painfull, also the mother is dead, so no.

maybe illidan doesn’t know where babies come from

ghoulghoulneighbor said: you’d think his hunters would be expecting this kind of thing by now tho

very true. new recruits learn very quickly not to stand behind Illidaddy. He’s very dramatic and very passionate. when he gets excited he can’t control his wings

shadowphoenixrider said: I’d like to add that if you put a pet bed down, it’ll attempt to ‘sit’ in it. Reduced my bf to wheezing laughter when he saw it.

FDHDfhd I KNOW ISN’T IT GREAT. You make him jump through the flaming hoop too.

It catches on fire sometimes and runs away...oops

shalar0s said: I’m dying over the “well that’s new.” Oh my god I can’t breathe.

nothing surprises Moroes anymore. Nothing.

unidentified-starman said: see, kids? this is what happens when you party (& clean up the library) too much

Ben!Khadgar? Before Medivh.

Game!Khadgar? After Medivh.

Medivh is a helluva drug

spicymulligan said: Boy howdy ur gonna LOVE Glee then

this is the worst thing you’ve ever said to me

ghoulghoulneighbor said: The ONLY way to treat your giant fuzzy murdercat

she loves her giant fuzzy murdercats <33

owmyeyeballs said: I want to hug Dilly too!

She needs a hug tbh

apaladinfailure said: this is entirely possible with genn greymane

SOMEONE DREW THAT!! I don’t know where it is but it was his wife riding on his back into battle

derp-mage said: It would have been glorious and now I’m mad he didn’t go full on worgen run

blizzard let us ride Malfurion in his regular form

WAIT NO

owmyeyeballs said: KHADGAR DO NOT FUCK THE SKULL

too late. he hurt himself rip

unidentified-starman said: it’ll look even more ridiculous when he appears in the warcraft movie sequel or smth (i hope it gets made sometime). he’ll probably be at least half cgi (or a man flapping his arms in a motion capture suit). look at cgi malfurion go

I am excited and dreading the day they add Malfurion to the films. Because he’s either going to look awesome or fuckin terribly hilarious (more likely tbh) and I can’t wait. (SHIT...motion capture behind the scene shit is so great)

shadowphoenixrider said: pffft that second one. AFAIK Khadgar asplodes everyone in Kilrogg’s vision, but I don’t think it’s Mythic difficulty? Could be wrong.

hmm i just did the Kilrogg fight on mythic on both Diily and Alaluria and didn’t get any visions. Is there something I have to do to trigger it? (i will cry)

ghoulghoulneighbor said: Your tag said wing burrito and I thought of a burrito stuffed with chicken wings, with the horns and blindfold. …I’ll see myself out.

*muffled sobbing from the bathroom* I was not prepared for these burritos..

shadowphoenixrider said: Don’t apologise, I love hearing these.

you’re an angel. thank you <3

carlyrosk said: That’s how I am too oh my god. That cinematic crushed both me and my Deathlord! I can’t wait to hear your thoughts on Genn! He’s been through SO much, and he’s just snapped with Varian’s death.

Genn’s reaction to Varian’s death in the cinematic kills me every time. Genn kills me. My poor old wolf man </3

#replies #carlyrosk #shadowphoenixrider #ghoulghoulneighbor #unidentified-starman #owmyeyeballs #derp-mage #apaladinfailure #anzareveange #shalar0s #doitsuki #a-little-squirrely-sunshine #ship-garbage-pile #lovesdaryl #skullkind #casterlycosplay #highpriestessbriyanna #the babe

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darrycurtises · 8 years ago

Note

for the 'send me a character' thing - Darry, Evie, Cherry, Mark Jennings and BJ Jackson (if you haven't read all the SE books, don't worry. and tag/send this to changesxnight when you're done cause she loves you)

(wow i wonder who couldve sent this cryptic anon) i love u too britt

Darry

First impressions?

listen,,, i was such a bab when i first read this book,, and i 100% sided w pony and so my first impression of darry was just >:(

Impression now?

if i was to write down my full impression of darry i honestly think i’d give yall like a 50000 word essay in chicago style but suffice it to say that DARRY IS AMAZING and a million percent hes the most selfless person in the whole world and honestly the only NORMAL ONE like y’all can stan soda all u want but he still eats jelly and eggs im not About it

Favorite Moment? im gonna pick three because im an actual trash can,,,

There was an uneasy silence: Who was going to start it? Darry solved the problem. He stepped forward under the circle of light made by the street lamp. For a minute, everything looked unreal, like a scene out of a JD movie or something. Then Darry said, “I’ll take on anyone.”

iconic

“I’ll be okay,” I said wearily. “How come you never worry about Sodapop as much? I don’t see you lecturin’ him.“

��Man,”- Darry grinned and put his arm across Soda’s shoulders - “this is one kid brother I don’t have to worry about."

Soda punched him in the ribs affectionately.

"This kiddo can use his head." Sodapop looked down at me with mock superiority, but Darry went on: "You can see he uses it for one thing - to grow hair on.” He ducked Soda’s swing and took off for the door.

Two-Bit stuck his head in the door just as Darry went flying out of it. Leaping as he went off the steps, Darry turned a somersault in mid-air, hit the ground, and bounced up before Soda could catch him.

ADORABLE

“Darry, do you think they’ll split us up? Put me in a home or something?"

He was silent. "I don’t know, baby. I just don’t know.”

what a Dad™

Idea for a story?

ok so i would die for any story that fleshes out the relationship darry had w his dad like im living for happy, stress-free, younger darry

Unpopular opinion?

i don’t really know that there are any opinions i have about him that would be considered unpopular? r there still people who claim he’s abusive or are they like a cryptid now

Favorite relationship?

darry x happiness

Favorite headcanon?

it’s one of mine it’s that his fave music is swing he is the ultimate Dad™

Evie

First impression?

“what’s evie short for? evelyn? evangeline? e v a n e s c e n c e.”

Impression now?

*banging pots and pans together* AN EVIE NOVEL!!!! EVIE NOVEL!!! BLEASE

Favorite moment?

Did they cry when their boys were arrested, like Evie did when Steve got hauled in, or did they run out on them the way Sylvia did Dallas?

this is the only line in the book where it talks about her doing something? like the only other lines are “we’re going to a game” and “she, along with the other rarely mentioned females in the book, are greasy like us, and the only girls we have a chance with.” so, se hinton, step up ur girl-writing game, it weak

Idea for a story?

i feel like she and sylvia would be rlly interesting together id love to see them like as tag-team scammers

Unpopular opinion?

evie is soft,,,, she is not like wild child sylvia (that’s why i feel like they’d be a good team,like sylvia gets her out on the town, evie stops her from stealing a stop sign or something)

Favorite relationship?

i believe in evie x steve i really do,,

Favorite headcanon?

EVIE PICKS WILDFLOWERS AND DRIES THEM, AND THEY CREEP STEVE OUT HE SAYS ITS LIKE THE ADDAMS FAMILY HOUSE BUT SHE THINKS THEYRE PRETTY

Cherry

First impression?

an actual literal goddess come to Earth, better than we deserve, needs a solo trip to the beach

Impression now?

an actual literal goddess come to Earth, so much better than we will ever deserve, needs 30 solo trips to the beach

Favorite moment?

Dally came striding back with an armful of Cokes. He handed one to each of the girls and sat down beside Cherry. “This might cool you off."

She gave him an incredulous look; and then she threw her Coke in his face. "That might cool you off, greaser. After you wash your mouth and learn to talk and act decent, I might cool off, too.”

i mean how could i pick any other moment,,,

Idea for a story?

literally any story where she isn’t shipped with anyone let her and marcia go on a crosscountry roadtrip where they take pictures at the grand canyon where they’re like “falling off the cliff lol scared u!”

Unpopular opinion?

i’m not sure if this opinion is actually unpopular or not but she was well within her rights to refuse seeing johnny at the hospital?? like i know this is debated a lot but she didnt owe him anything, no matter how much we love him, she doesnt have to

Favorite relationship?

cherry x being true to herself (also a version of bob where he respects that she doesn’t like him drinking around her)

Favorite headcanon?

i honestly haven’t seen that many cherry headcanons? where are they? im just gonna say i totally believe in her as a beach lady

Mark Jennings

First impression?

i loved this boy so much like you dont even understand. the only person in the book i liked more than mark was charlie (im still angry)

Impression now?

*ugly sobbing* hhe wa sjuust truin gto helpp oit brryonss momm,,.,,,

Favorite moment?

“How goes it?” I managed finally. “What’s the action like in here?”

“If I told you how it was in here,” he said, “you’d be sick.” There was a silence. Then, he continued. “I didn’t have to see you. I wanted to, though. I had to make sure.”

“Make sure of what?”

“Make sure I hated you.”

Idea for a story?

An entire overhaul of the whole book where he doesn’t end up in jail, full of hate.

Unpopular opinion?

so i’m not 100% on what the general agreement is on mark, but my unpopular opinion is i understand where he was coming from. he was trying to make money for the household that took him in when his life fell apart, and bryon’s minimum wage job wasn’t cutting it, and he knew desperate times call for desperate measures. i don’t agree with it, but i get it, and for the 213537356623465752676th time, bryon could have talked to mark. they were close, and he might’ve been able to influence him, but he didn’t try.

Favorite relationship?

hhhhh i appreciated the mother/son bond between him and bryon’s mom? i can’t remember a lot about the nuances of this book, but whatever.

Favorite headcanon?

i honestly don’t know. im just v sad about him and i want him to grow up to have as normal and happy a life as he can manage when he got out of prison.

BJ Jackson

i know nothing about this “”””bj jackson”””””. sounds like fake news to me.

i’m gonna let @changesxnight weigh in on this one, so sorry my love

THATS IT THANK U FOR REQUESTING BRITT SORRY IT TOOK TEN MILLION YEARS

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seungstarss · 2 years ago

Text

Hehe... heheh mai 🥰🥰🥰😘😘 heheheheheheheheheheehehehehehehehehheheehheeheh I HATE YOU⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ NOW YOU GOT A LOTTTT OF EXPLAINING TO DO BECAUSE BESTIE 🥰🥰🥰🥰 THIS IS NOT FUNNY 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩😇

first of all.... you hit me with the beginning and all that emotional weight. Listen now sis when I tell u IT FELT SO INTIMATE (in a good way ofc) LIKE GIRL I FELT ALL THE EMOTION AND IT BROKE ME. WHEN YN BROKE DOWN AND THE WAY ALL HER EMOTIONS CAME FLOODING THROUGH⁉️⁉️⁉️ YOUR WRITING IS PHENOMENAL. AN ABSOLUTE MASTERPIECE AND YOUR STYLE IS JUST SO INTRICATE. THE DETAIL JUST CAPTURES PEOPLE AND YOU HAVE SUCH A TALENT FOR GETTING PEOPLE EMOTIONALLY INVESTED. YOUVE DONE IT WITH OPEN SESAME AND THIS IS MAKING ME FEEL THE SAME WAY (EXCEPT IM FUCKING BAWLING RN 🤩🥰)

ANYWAYS BACK TO THE CHAPTER. I LITERALLY FELT SM LOVE FOR TRIAGE HEE WHEN HE CAME AND COMFORTED YN AND EMBRACED HER.... LIKE STOP IM GONNA CRY HES THE MOST PRECIOUS AND SWEET BOY EVER.... I JUST WANNA GIVE HIM A HUG. ALSO HIM "PATTING HER HEAD" WHILE COMFORTING HER??? IDK WHY LIKE ITS SO SIMPLE BUT THE WAY YOU WROTE IT MADE ME SO DAMN SOFT⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ LIKE BESTIE I WILL LITERALLY GO INSANE! SELL MY KIDNEYS FOR TRIAGE HEE❗️❗️❗️💥

now moving on...... the whole inner struggle that yn is having with herself just HITS so damn hard. The way she thinks she isn't good for him because he is just THAT pure and THAT good of a person. It's like a "too good to be true" and "how can someone like this even exist in a damned world like this." It's SO RAW AND SO TRUE TO REALITY AND I CAN SPEAK ABT THIS FROM A PERSONAL EXPIRENCE. ofc they're not like my significant other or wtv but they're a friend of mine and I always questioned how someone like him could even EXISIT??? Like I found it so hard to wrap my head around the fact that he was just THAT pure and THAT good of a person. And it feels like you're tainting them bc you can never be as pure/"clean"(?) As them. The fact that yn is going through this struggle within herself is SO REALISTIC AND IT HITS BC I CAN TOTALLY 100000% UNDERSTAND WHERE SHES COMING FROM. and what's different is that yn is definitely developing feelings which JUST MAKES HER STUGGLE WITHIN HERSELF EVEN MORE COMPLEX. like wow.... I'm just so speechless on how you portrayed it. It's so beautiful???? Like IK HER STRUGGLES AINT BEAUTIFUL BUT THE WAY U FLESHED OUT HER FEELINGS.... GOSH MAI IM IN LOVE WITH UR WRITING. 🥺😭

Okay now let's move on to that final scene shall we 🤩🥰🥰🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪 okay saur.... the fact that yn and hee both want out and both OBVIOUSLY ARE MADE FOR EACH OTHER... DONT DONT COMMUNICATE A SINGLE SHREAD OF THAT EMOTION BC BOTH ARE EQUALLY AS SCARED.... this breaks me like..... when heeseung realizes that no one makes him as happy as yn.... 😭😭😭😭 mai I will FUXKING CRY..... like also yn just getting so jealous... pls pls just pls just get married already lol 😭😭😭

But then of course,,, you had to hit us WITH THAT 🥰🔪 LIKE HAHAH...HAHAHA MAI... AHAHAHAH 💖💖💖💖💖🥰 first of all when heeseung went to the second floor I KNEW smth was gonna happen I was like PLEASE NO PLEASE NO.... LIKE UMMM FUCK TRIAGE! RYU AND TAE??⁉️⁉️⁉️ LIKE THEY CAN ALL TAKE A HIKE OFF A CLIFF⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ I ABSOLUTELY DISPISE BOTH OF THEM AND ITS MAKING ME THINK MURDER IS OKAY/j🥰🥰🥰 but oh my FUCKING Gosh.... when yn found him in the room just curled up in the corner ..... when j tell u my heart just FUXKING dropped. When he told her to leave him alone............. mai........ dude my heart cracked fr. Like the way I could picture this scene so vividly. Like the way his eyes were just bloodshot red BYE BYEEEEEEE I LITERALLY ALMOST CRIED AT THE END WHEN HE SAID "you can have your puzzle back, I don't want it anymore." My heart just broke..... and it WONF FUCKING HEAL UNTIL I FIND OUT WHAT BAPPENED AND WHAT THE FUCK THEY SAID TO HIM. I'm so fucking sad rn like you DONT UNDERSTAND. I LITERALLY DROPPED MY PHONE IN SHOCK AND IN PAIN. IM NOT LYING I FOR REAL JUST DROPPED MY PHONE ON THE GROUND....... LIKE WHAT THE FUCK. I DONT TJINK IVE EVER BEEN THIS EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN A STORY AND GOSH THIS IS BREAKING ME SM..... LIKE I CAN GO ON FOR DAYS ABT IT BUT JUST KNOW IM COMING FOR YOUR NECK 🥰🥰🥰 SO GIVE THEM A HAPPY ENDING PLS BC I HATE ANGST SO FUCKING MUCH AND I WILL. I WILL GO INSANE IF THEY DONT GET TGT. THEY ARE MADE FOR EACH OTHER OKAY. 😭😭😭😭🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪

Holy shit??? This is so long what the fuck and its not even my final review on this series? Just KNOW that this chapter LITERALLY CUT ME IN THE FUCKING CHEST OKAY. I WILL NEVER. NEVER BE OKAY UNTIL THEy GET THEIR HAPPY ENDING. HEESEUNGS LAST LINE WILL LINGER IN MY HEAD AND I WILL FR GO INSANE..... BITCH.... IM CRYING FR. I HATE U SM.... LIKE I CANT EVEN EXPLAIN BUT THIS LITERALLY MOVED ME AND IM SO FUCKING SAD NOW.......

Anyways I'm sorry this is so long. U don't even have to read it but just know I loved it so fucking much and now imma go cry myself to sleep 🥰🥰🔪

triage — ft. lee heeseung (chapter IV)

you try to teach the nerd how to date.

synopsis: heeseung is not, by any measure, date-able. he’s dorky, he’s nerdy, and he does this weird thing where he snorts loudly every time he laughs. in fact, he loves everything that normal people are allergic to — computer science, collecting rare comic books, and birdwatching on the weekend.

given that you two have obviously nothing in common, you find yourself utterly flabbergasted when you receive a letter in your locker, on which heeseung has written, "hi. will you please teach me how to date?"

MASTERLIST HERE !

kayla’s playlist (@/miiiwaa) ♡ my shitty og playlist . tags : #.*triage .

TAGLIST

@enhyflirt @dreamyenskz @icedcoffeesunwoo @ssolari @skazoo @jjunis @heejake-en @koroktsuya @jeongwins @tinykoi-s @en-boyz @soobin-chois @blessed-sky @jhyunieee @kisswon @vbxrin @cosmicsunghoon @bloomedberry @jungwonielove @miiiwaa @jungwoniee @lhsng @missharubear @deonuism @sarahxy537 @bambisgirl @hrrhmay-primaryblog @yeonzzun @msxflower @sunsunu @jangwonie @sweetjaemss @seungstarss @tokyoflies @solelyenha @softforqiankun @goodforgyu @va1ry @taekbokki @ashxxkook @moon-gyus @jakeified @markleeisdabestdrug @wccycc @viagumi @pisss111 @outrologist @fairfairee @hiqhkey @ctrlemis

chapter four

word count: 6.5k | navigation: previous / next / MASTERLIST warnings: swearing, (verbal) bullying

‎‎‏‏‎ ‎

“can i consider this my first real date?”

you feel your stomach twist and your heart begin to race, because while you must have convinced yourself that you were far beyond the stage of craving romance — you’re not.

you want it. you want romance. you want this romance, you want the one with the smiles and the giggles and the clumsy ballroom dancing and ice creams at a park and foam moustaches from nice cafés around town. you desperately want this kind of romance, but you want it with heeseung.

because you’ve realised that while you’re a sunset, heeseung is a sunrise.

the kind of sunrise that rises during dawn; one that touches everything around it with a golden glow and brightens any room to the standards of heaven.

he makes everything around him glow.

even you.

he makes even you feel like you can glow.

“you… you want to consider me your first real date?” you mutter, disbelieving of his words.

“well, yeah.” he blushes, eyes cast to the side as he rubs the nape of his neck. “so... so i can brag about you...”

brag?

the rest of his sentence trickles off, but this is the point where your stomach mangles into a knot.

the thing about glow is that there must be darkness to begin — and if there’s anything your friendship with heeseung has shown you, it’s that you have so much darkness you’ve never been courageous enough to face.

after all, heeseung is far removed from the life you’re accustomed to.

brag?

there is nothing about you worth bragging about.

you’ve spent years indulging in the exhilaration of danger and chaos, mistaking it for fulfilment and happiness. in your darkest days, you found shreds of pleasure in late night parties, cigarettes and blunts, and shallow friendships you always secretly knew deepened the void in your soul.

but heeseung is good. he is pure-hearted, and honest, and sweet, and so, so kind.

so as you sit here in heeseung’s car, faced with the realisation that you are dark and he is light, you can’t help but disintegrate into tears.

you begin sobbing.

your darkness unravels from its knot — every fissure, every fracture, and every tiny splinter that traces your soul is exposed bare. you reveal your innermost insecurities to heeseung, crying because you feel undeserving of all the kindness he’s shown you.

tonight’s wedding date was one of the best nights of your life. it felt ethereal, like a movie brought to life or your favourite song played live and just for you. it was fun. too fun; the kind that makes it painfully obvious that you must eventually float back to earth and be dragged to reality. you cry and cry, guilt and misery seizing your throat. you don’t deserve him, because while he admires you like a goddess, you are nothing but damaged goods with skeletons and dust in her closet.

the silence that hangs in the air is paralysing.

this must be a long time coming, because more sobs erupt from you than you thought possible — how long have you been holding in your misery?

or, perhaps you should have seen this coming — after all, there was always a voice that echoed in your subconscious each time you witnessed your shitty friends do shitty things. or when you’d wake up on a sunday morning and stare at the ceiling and contemplate the way you’ve wasted another night mindlessly partying. or when ryujin or taehyun exchanged malicious words about your classmates and you never said a thing until heeseung came along.

he must be terribly stunned by your reaction, but you are so inconsolably wretched that you don’t notice he’s exited the driver’s seat. in fact, heeseung has already dashed around to the other side of the car. he opens the door on your side, instantly wrapping you into an embrace that tucks your face into the crook of his neck.

warm. heeseung is warm.

“i-i’m so sorry!” he squeaks. you inhale the scent of his soft cologne, while his warmth oozes into you and softens your heart. he doesn’t understand the reason behind your tears, and instead frantically pats your hair in an attempt to comfort you. “a-are you okay? ah, right— no, you’re obviously not okay... i’m… i’m so sorry. was it me? did i make you cry? whatever it is, i’m so, so sorry, okay?”

you sob harder.

why is he apologising?

and why is he so goddamn warm?

with your proximity, you can feel the pounding inside heeseung’s chest. his heart is hammering. he must be nervous, you think, because you’ve always held yourself with a high chin and a strong resolve.

is he disappointed that you are not as confident and self-assured as you seem?

or has he seen through you all this time?

truthfully, what makes you more miserable is that his warmth and touch are ridiculously comforting. you melt into his arms, wrapping yours around his back to pull him in closer. he’s like a sun that doesn’t burn.

“d-do…” his whisper as unsung as a feather in rain, “…do you want ice cream? or… or cookies? or… um… books? i-i really don’t kno—”

his kind offers only make you sob harder. he truly is the personification of a sunrise, isn’t he? he’s bright, he’s warm, and with his presence, you find a sort of clarity you’ve been seeking all your life.

“i-i—”

“it’s okay, it’s okay,” he shushes you, noticing the way you choke on your words. he rubs circles on your back, then strokes your hair, then pulls you in close and squeezes his cheek against the side of your head, enchanting you with his comfort and intimacy. seconds and minutes pass as you hug him as tightly as you can, indulging in another one of your selfish desires.

one more time, you think.

you could afford to be selfish just one more time.

you and heeseung never spoke about that night again.

the next time you saw him, you knew by the look in his eyes that he wanted to ask if you were okay. however, hesitant to admit your innermost insecurity about not being good enough for him, you gave him a simple smile and he never pushed any further.

from then, you let yourself enjoy simple pleasures with heeseung, and together, you embraced the aspects of your life you loathed most. you improved. you started studying again after he began tutoring you. you focused in class, read books, slept early, and rid yourself of all the bad influences in your life. you flourished and bloomed and slowly, with each tiny achievement you amassed across a few weeks, became more and more confident that you weren’t so bad after all.

it’s funny, because you’d once promised to teach heeseung how to date, without knowing that he’d teach you how to heal. now, you realise that these two come hand in hand. perhaps the reason you never let yourself settle down with a boy was because you’d never learned to heal first.

and because of this, you fall a little harder and harder for him each day.

you’re not sure it’s even love — but whatever it is, it exists and you feel it vibrate along your bones. and that’s enough for you to know it’s there, even if most of your affections are hidden in shadows.

you might not deserve him, but you allow yourself to admire him in secrecy. you collect little memories and store them inside precious jars inside your heart. you watch him during the day and think about him during the night. you watch the way he scrunches up his shoulders when he laughs and the way his eyes sparkle when he talks about his mom. like a broken record, you replay every kind deed he does for you and roll around in your bed, giddy and blushing at the memory of every time your hands accidentally touched. you become absorbed in an innocent, pure love you hadn't thought could be possible for you.

however, you know better than to keep him to yourself. after all, with each step to becoming a better person, you understand he is leaps and bounds out of your league. so, despite the way it makes your heart ache, you continue to teach heeseung.

in the same way he teaches you how to heal, you continue to teach him how to date. you accompany him on fake dates and show him how to approach random strangers with confidence. you teach him how to dress, how to hold a conversation, what to do at the end of the date, how to make a girl swoon, and finally, how to recognise when they’re in love with him.

despite the fact that it makes your heart uneasy, you teach him the final lesson.

HOW TO DATE: LESSON 3 — only ever date people that are in your league. otherwise, you’re just setting yourself up for failure.

unbeknownst to you, this lesson is the very reason why heeseung’s heart is uneasy, too.

because he’s wondering the exact same thing.

is he good enough for you?

“i really think you should go, heeseung.”

“really?”

“really.”

it’s 5pm on a friday night, and the two of you are inside his bedroom — you, sitting on the edge of his bed with one leg folded over the other, and him nervously pacing around the room. he’s been like this ever since you both had returned from school.

your eyes follow each of his movements, even if that means he goes up and down the room — up and down and up and down and up and do—

“i-i… i don’t know.” he mumbles, gnawing on the nail of his thumb. you watch in amusement as he suddenly halts and huffs his cheeks. “i just… well, i’ve never really been to a party before.”

your eyes almost bulge out their sockets. “wait, really? never?”

he offers you a bashful look, straightening his school uniform. “n-never. is that bad?”

not bad, just surprising, though the more you think about it, not very surprising at all. it’s lee heeseung after all, the boy with his nose stuck so far into books that the tip of it probably has ink stains. “of course not!” you wave your hands, hoping to quell his anxiety.

heeseung shoots you an uneasy look, so you stand and gently clasp his wrist, dragging him to sit with you on the bed. the two of you land on it with a soft thud and you hold one of his shoulders in reassurance.

“seriously, you should go.” you say with a soft smile. “it’ll be really fun!”

“you think?” he winces.

“yeah!” you nod enthusiastically. “i can help you pick out an outfit and everything. you’ll be the hottest guy there. girls…” you try to bite back the uncomfortable tug at your heart, “... will be all over you. you’ll have, like, four dates to attend the next day.”

“four dates?” he stares at you, puzzled. “that doesn’t seem very time-efficient—”

“it’s a hyperbole, heeseung. shut up.” you cut him off with a roll of the eyes. he giggles from your reaction, softening your expression. “in all seriousness, you should go. you know, my first party was crazy fun, like basically i ended up drinking a little too much and i woke up the next day with this video of me running down the road half-nak—”

he blinks.

“—uh, nauseated. half-nauseated. i was very sick, so i walked all the way home, totally sober and safe and normal! yes. i did just that.”

you turn away and cough awkwardly, forgetting about how unhinged most of your party stories seem to end. regardless, it really is your sincerest hope that heeseung goes — it’ll be good for him to go out and socialise with people that aren’t you; he’s obviously getting better and better at making friends with his classmates if he’s already received his first party invitation.

“i-i don’t know… i’m not really going to know anybody there…”

“i’ll pick you up afterwards!” you grin, making the edges of his lips tug upward. then, you reach over and stroke his head, lowering yours to coo at him sarcastically. “and make sure you’re safe and all tucked into bed ‘cause you’re being such a baby.”

“b-baby?” his eyes widen while he bites back a smile, blush trickling into his cheeks. his actions make your eyes quickly dart to his lips before you tell yourself to stop thinking about kissing him. “hm…” he taps his chin with a restrained smile, before his eyes brighten and his head snaps up at you. “why don’t you come with me?”

you stare at him like he’s speaking a foreign language. “what? no!”

“why not?” he whines, nudging you with his shoulder. “you said it yourself! parties are fun!”

“well yeah, but, i’m kinda doing this thing where i stop drinking, heeseung!” you laugh, in reference to your recent life deep-cleanse. you’ve cut out your friends and self-sabotaging, which most definitely includes your drinking and partying.

“you don’t have to drink!” heeseung beams. “it’ll be fun. i-i think i’d be a lot more comfortable if you were there…”

shit.

you feel yourself waver. truthfully speaking, you do miss partying, and you’re certain it’d be a hundred times better with heeseung by your side. perhaps it’d be good for you to keep a look out for heeseung; you know how most of these events tend to go. if they’re anything like the ones your friends used to host, one or two poor suckers almost always walk home with an embarrassing story that gets echoed into the hallways. there was no chance in hell you’d let that happen to your sweet boy.

“but i wasn’t invited.” you frown. ironically, your popularity has taken quite the hit — apparently, having your ex-best friend ryujin spread nasty rumors isn’t painting the nicest picture of you with the rest of the student body. you don’t really care for it, but you would certainly find it weird to show up to a party nobody expects you to attend.

“who cares? if they kick us out, we can hang out afterwards.” heeseung beams, his eyes crinkling with his smile. “late night bike rides?”

you can’t help but grin back, feeling the heavy feeling in your chest lift. late night bike rides — just him, you, and the chilly breeze as his bicycle courses its away down the pave way.

“okay… fine.”

truthfully, a part of you hopes this party doesn’t even happen.

unbeknownst to you, a part of heeseung is hoping the exact same thing.

apparently, picking out an outfit for heeseung is not easy when you disagree on his chosen tee.

“but people love superheroes.” heeseung pouts. “that’s why they’re called super. because they’re super cool.”

“dude, if you say another word, i will literally shove this shirt down your throat.” you growl, yanking the superhero tee out his hands and tossing it across the room. his head follows the direction it flies and he watches it land with a soft thud. “that shirt is an abomination and deserves to be burned.”

“aw,” he slumps. “but… that was iron man.”

“more like, iron letting anybody wear that outside.” you snort from your pun before your smile quickly vanishes. fuck. did you just laugh at your own joke? is heeseung making you… lame? is this who you are now? “okay… anyway.” you shudder at that thought. “i picked this outfit for you. come look!”

heeseung stamps his lips together, waddling closer toward you as he peers into his own closet. you quickly retrieve the white dress-shirt you’ve chosen and the cream white sweater you’re hoping to layer it with. across the sweater are thick black vertical lines and a front print that reads stray souls pray for us, among other ominous words you hope will suffice in creating an edgy aura. “i thought maybe we could pair this with some black jeans, a necklace and chuck on a bunch of fake piercings. you’ll look emo, but at least you won’t look horny for a man made out of metal.”

“hey! that’s so disrespectful to iron man!”

“whatever man,” you shove all the clothes in his hands while shuffling toward the bedroom door so you can leave. “i’m going to get changed in the bathroom. just tell me when you’re finished dressing.”

you place your hand on the door knob before halting. oh, right!

whirling around, you rush for your backpack in the corner.

“by the way,” you grin, unzipping your backpack and reaching into it to retrieve something. heeseung stares at you curiously, only to find himself wide-eyed when you yank out a small box from your bag.

“this is for you.” you excitedly grin. “i saw it the other day in a store and it reminded me of you.”

his eyes instantly round in surprise. “this is for me?”

“yeah,” you smile. “i know i told myself no more shoplifting but i couldn’t resist it.”

he gasps loudly. “wait, y-you stole this?” he shrieks nervously, eyes bouncing between you and the box.

you chuckle easily. “well, yeah. i mean, only ‘cause i forgot my purse.”

“i could’ve paid it for you!”

“but then it wouldn’t have been a gift.” you shake your head. “just take it, heeseung. i’ll, uh… drop off the money to them tomorrow.”

he presses his lips into a line, eventually succumbing to your compromise. now, he finally examines the box in his hands, peeking curiously. “but… what is it?” he asks, slowly peeling the wrapping away.

“a jigsaw puzzle!” you explain excitedly. “i just thought—i don’t know, you once mentioned you and your mother like to do jigsaw puzzles together, and… i thought this picture was really pretty.”

he stares at first before a smile instantly sweeps his features. “wow, thank you so much!” heeseung beams, and the sparkle in his eyes makes you feel unimaginably elated. his smile is so damn pretty but it’s even prettier when you’re the reason for it. “so what’s the picture?”

“just some landscape photo.” you mutter, too embarrassed to admit that it’s a sunset. something about admitting this inside joke is frankly a bit embarrassing — what if he’s long forgotten about it? what if this is entirely one-sided?

heeseung giggles as he opens the box and peers at the jigsaw pieces inside it. “ah! a sunset of course.” he bobs his head. “a sunset from miss sunset.” he smiles affectionately, “i love it so much.”

you smile and nod your head once, desperately containing your excitement. can’t show too much, and all at once.

he then captures your attention by rummaging through the pieces and yanking one of them out of it. “here!” he holds it out for you, causing you to stare in bewilderment.

“what?”

“keep it.” he urges.

“but… then you can’t finish your puzzle.” you blink.

“that’s the point!” he giggles. “so you can have an excuse to meet my mom one day.”

you’re nervously staring at your reflection in the mirror, adjusting the way the clothes sit on your body. you had quickly come home and back to heeseung’s to grab a change of clothes, but now you fear that you’d chosen the wrong ones.

or perhaps there was never a “wrong” outfit to choose because they’re all horribly inappropriate. it’s infuriating dealing with your past self — why the hell are all your skirts so damn short?

perhaps you’ve been too focused on dealing with heeseung’s closet to realise that you need a change of your own. the only party attire you own is everything you used to wear, which is a gaudy collection of mini skirts, cropped tops, distressed denim and tops that borderline lingerie. for fuck’s sake, you curse to yourself, fidgeting with the outfit you’re already embarrassed at the thought of heeseung seeing.

you’ve chosen a black mini skirt and a matching sleeveless halter top that knots at the back of your neck, accentuating your shoulders and drawing attention to the bare expanse of your back. this was always one of your go-to outfits — admittedly, it was a crowd favourite, but only because it flatters all your nicest assets and treads the line between flirty and fun.

dreading how heeseung will react on seeing this, you release your hair so it flows down your back and adjust your makeup, forcing a smile at yourself to see your red-painted lips stretch.

“don’t come in; i look stupid.” heeseung mutters when he hears you just outside his bedroom door, so you peer inside before opening it widely with a big grin. seated on the edge of the bed, he turns toward you at the door and opens his mouth to speak before freezing when he sees you.

“w-woah.”

you feel your entire face burn like metal under the sun, because heeseung continues to stare, eyes rounded and mouth slightly ajar. “sorry,” you blush profusely, brushing your hair so that it conceals as much of your top as possible. “fuck, my, uh, closet isn’t very wholesome and so—”

“n-no!” he cries, waving his hands around frantically. “i-i wasn’t thinking that! i promise!”

you stamp your lips into an awkward smile and trail across the room.

“the jewellery fits you really well, by the way.” you comment, appreciating the way his necklace and earrings elevate the overall badass aura this outfit has given him. the sweater makes his shoulders look wide, while the dress-shirt collar that peeks out from beneath it makes him look fashionable. these jeans would look good with some boots, you think, making a mental note of what already exists in his closet.

“your hair looks kinda dumb though.” you scoff playfully, standing in front of him now. “i’ll fix it.”

“n-no, it’s oka—”

he gulps, leaning back as you slide between the space between each of his legs and reach over to brush his hair with your fingers. bit by bit, you gently untangle any knots and use small amounts of styling cream to get them in the right place. it causes you to occasionally lean in to reach the ends at the back, so he turns his face to the side in an attempt to avoid contact with your chest. “a-ah… um, m-maybe you should—”

“i think it’ll look really nice like this.” you comment absentmindedly, without realising that you’ve completely enveloped him with your scent.

you’re close.

you’re too close, he thinks, but you don’t seem to realise it — truthfully, you’re a little too focused to have heard heeseung, nor the way his hand is slowly resting on your waist.

then, you feel his fingers brush against the bare skin of your waist just above your skirt, and your whole body freezes.

he’s touching you. heeseung is touching you.

every inch of your skin that he touches sends shivers down your spine, but before you can begin to process what’s happening, he gently pushes you away by a grip on your hips.

“stop.” he mumbles, head hanging low. “please stop, okay?” you stumble back when he pushes you a little further. you stand, dumbfounded and stunned, his fingers burning every inch of the skin he’s touched like a scathing chisel.

did you do something wrong?

is he uncomfortable with you?

how close is too close?

“i-i can do it myself.” he mumbles, desperately concealing his flushed face before rushing toward his bathroom, so quick that you stare off at the absent space left on his seat on the bed.

for the first time, the car ride is silent. you’d like to have the courage to speak up, but the last time anybody had ever spoken was when you’d thanked him for giving you the handbag you almost forgot to bring along. he’d gotten red, dipped his head and muttered a quiet you’re welcome, and that in itself felt like the death of the conversation.

during the car ride to the party, you fiddle with the hem of your mini skirt, plagued with a re-run of what happened in his bedroom. perhaps you’re getting a little too comfortable with him; or perhaps he just doesn’t need your guidance anymore.

now you just feel a moron.

perhaps you shouldn't have decided to come to this party after all.

“s-sorry.” heeseung finally squeaks, so you whip your head toward the driver’s seat. he seems to be nervously clutching the steering wheel with both eyes drilling the road ahead. “i’m sorry.”

what?

“what do you mean?” you frown, though the tension in your body dissipates now that you’re talking again.

“i’m really sorry.” heeseung gnaws on his lips, his body tense, and his eyes unable to be peeled away from the road. “i just… y-you’re, like, so pretty and everything about you is just... you make me really nervous, you know? i’m sorry i pushed you away, i just kind of… i— nevermind.” his entire reddens while he huffs his cheeks heftily. “y-you just… you look really, um.. wow. you look really, really incredible. and th-thank you for fixing my hair...”

incredible?

he thinks you look really, really incredible?

you instantly smile, feeling your heart swell with giddiness. not just incredible, and not just really incredible — but really, really incredible. you bite back a grin, quickly turning to the passenger window in an attempt to conceal your utter delight. you feel like a giddy middle schooler.

“it’s okay.” you whisper. “i’m just really, really glad we’re talking again.”

heeseung is many things. a smart boy, a loving son, but above everything else, a horrible, horrible drunk.

it doesn’t help that three hours in, you’re one of the only sober people surrounded by drunk morons. it felt like just a minute ago when the two of you were nervously standing outside yuna’s door, ushered inside and offered various drinks (which you pawned off to heeseung).

you glare at him from your seat halfway on the stairs, watching him through the balusters as he chats up lia. she’s been giggling uncontrollably ever since she found out that heeseung is (thanks to you!) super hot now.

fucking bitch.

she’s been playfully touching heeseung and laughing at all his jokes all night. he’s been blushing and timidly telling her more of his probably dumb as fuck chemistry jokes.

truthfully, you don’t even need the vodka — the burning sensation of jealousy inside your chest is enough to keep you flushed. thing is, you can’t even be mad — after all, you’re the one that taught him all the skills to flirt and you’re the one that even encouraged him to come to this lame ass party anyway.

you want to be able to enjoy this party, you really do, but it’s hard when your mind is going haywire. even a party like this — one inside yuna’s spacious house, decked with bottomless drinks, endless entertainment and rnb music — you can’t seem to take your mind off your favourite boy.

huffing in annoyance, you clench your jaw and take a sip of your stupid, cold ass water. water is such a dumb drink. who even likes drinking water? water is dumb and this party is dumb and heeseung is so fucking dumb.

“you look like you’re going to murder someone.”

you look up over your shoulder, past your mascara-laden lashes. standing a few stairs above you is ryujin, with her brows lifted and her hands on her hips. you instantly scowl and groan, turning back around.

“i’m not in the mood.” you tell your ex-best friend. “get lost.”

“bitch, this is my party and you’re telling me to get lost?”

you snap your head back up to stare at her in confusion, only to then connect the dots. right, you almost forgot — she’s friends with yuna.

she watches in amusement as you make the realisation, trodding down the steps to take the seat beside you. okay, this is officially weird — since when were you and ryujin on talking terms?

“your party’s shit.” you hiss at her, thinking about heeseung and a girl you might very soon rip the limbs off. she’s got her hand on heeseung’s arm and he’s blushing profusely because of it. childishly, you make note of where she’s touched so you know never to touch him there ever again. “it’s so fucking lame.”

“honey, you’ve been staring at that little dweeb all night. as if i’m not going to know the only reason you’re pissy is because you’re jealous.” ryujin snorts.

you glare at her again, making her lift her hands up in defence. “sorry, slip of tongue — not dweeb, just… boy. although whatever experiment you’ve been doing on him seems to be working. he’s like… highkey hot now.” she flashes a humorous smile. you press your lips together, unimpressed, instantly returning your gaze back to heeseung.

what the hell? they’re on the couch now?

“whatever.” you mumble, swirling the straw inside your cup. you’re well-accustomed to lying; it’s something that comes natural to you, but for some reason, you don’t even bother to hide your disdain for heeseung and lia.

she’s not right for him.

“taehyun’s coming to pick me up later if you wanna hang with us. we’re probably just going to chill at his house.” she grins.

“easy pass.” you scoff, thinking about the way she’s treated you. “and can you stop talking to me like we’re friends? we’re not, so get lost.”

ryujin offers you a wounded look. “dude, what’s your fucking issue? why are you always acting like you’re better than us? stop being such a pompous bitch.”

you instantly stand looking back at her with a furious gaze. “i’m leaving. don’t talk to me.”

heeseung doesn’t know love.

he knows many things, like the circumference of various planets and enough digits of pi to bore a whole party to sleep, but he doesn’t know love. after all, he’s never experienced anything remotely close to it.

lately, however, he’s been feeling like he’s inching closer and closer to the real thing.

and it’s all thanks to you.

your dating lessons have clarified a lot of what he always felt unsure about. he’s not the best with people and definitely not with girls, but you bring the clarity he’s always been searching for.

however, engaging in this conversation with lia has thrown out everything he thought he learned about girls.

are conversations always this… boring?

“yeah. isn’t school the worst?” lia giggles.

“haha, yes… i hate school…” heeseung nervously laughs, his smile fading away by the second. how can school be the worst when it’s the best?

he doesn’t mean to be rude, but he’s not having a great time. sitting here on the couch with lia is an experience he’s trying to push himself to have, but frankly the conversation just doesn’t run as smoothly as it does with you. besides, he’s definitely not the only person that’s obviously bored, because every time heeseung opens his mouth to share another fun fact about light bulbs, he can literally see the light in lia’s eyes vanish.

she’s not really having the best time either, yet somehow she’s becoming more touchy by the minute.

it’s contradictory. he doesn’t understand what she’s thinking. and this is not a problem he faced when going on all those fake dates with you.

he’s really, really confused and when he feels this way, there’s only one person that smooths out the mangled mess in his brain — you.

as he quickly tears his eyes away from lia and surveys the area for a glimpse of you, he finds himself more anxious when he can’t. miss sunset, miss sunset, miss sunset… your name repeats in his head like a drum. you’re truly the only thing in the world that makes sense (other than science, of course), and now that the effects of alcohol are beginning to afflict him, he’s finding it more and more hard to be without you.

so he quickly excuses himself from lia and springs to his feet.

“hey! b-but heechul, i thought we could maybe… you know, leave this party together?” she smiles, brows lifted in anticipation.

heeseung blinks. “my name is heeseung.”

her face falls. “oh.”

“i mean, unless my parents are dyslexic and read my birth certificate wrong,” he jokes, snorting at first until he realises she’s not laughing. that’s when his smile instantly vanishes and he dips his head low in shame. maybe he’s only funny to miss sunset. “s-sorry.” he blushes, “i-i really have to go. m-maybe i’ll see you around?”

lia huffs before sighing. “okay, i guess.”

scratching the nape of his neck, he whirls around and begins his search for you.

as he traverses his way through the crowds of people and dodges the spillage of the drinks in their hands, he eventually discovers that he’s making loops around the first storey. ah, he reminds himself, there’s a second storey! he climbs the stairs, taking note of the cups that have been left up along it. there are two — one of which has a familiar lipstick stain he’s pretty sure you’d worn.

he’d know.

after all, he’s been staring at your lips all day.

sparing some time, he neatly stacks the cups together and brings them with him upstairs in search for a garbage container. as he reaches the second storey, he notices a few closed bedroom doors and one which is slightly ajar.

batting his lashes curiously, he hears distant chatter at the bedroom at the very end of the hallway. ignoring it, he walks right across the carpet, locating the bathroom. after discarding the trash, he takes a few minutes of examining his reflection (lia had ruined the hair you made look so pretty) before exiting the bathroom.

then he halts in his feet, because he hears a loud crash.

concerned, he bolts toward the bedroom at the end of the hallway and swings the door open, only to immediately regret his actions afterward.

because he’s just seen something he shouldn’t have.

standing beside the bed, ryujin and taehyun are tangled in each other’s arms. heeseung’s eyes immediately widen as their lips detach and they snap their heads over at him, equally as shocked as him.

oh no.

“oh, for fuck’s sake!” ryujin cries, shoving taehyun away from her as she glares ferociously at heeseung. “what the fuck are you doing here?”

heeseung slowly backs away. “s-sorry.” he raises both his hands, feeling regret and horror trickle inside of him. isn’t taehyun dating his cousin, minjeong? aren’t they both your friends? didn’t you and taehyun have a… thing? his brain hurts.

he continually backs away, before taehyun lunges toward him and yanks him in the bedroom.

“let’s have a little talk, you dweeb.”

“you’re hot. can i have your number?”

“look at me. does it look like i want to give you my number?” you stare at him, boring holes into his eyes until he’s uncomfortable and leaves. you’re not normally this mean when boys try to hit on you, but frankly you’ve had enough of this night.

after your fight with ryujin, you’d driven to a nearby convenience store to grab some snacks for heeseung.

you’d figured he’d be peckish after all that drinking. but now that you’ve returned to the party and the boy is nowhere to be seen (and neither is lia, by the way), you’ve come to a solution that’s driving you crazy.

they’re probably off making out somewhere.

upset, you hold your own pity party in the kitchen by making yourself some iced cola. man, the vodka bottle is looking awfully tempting, but once again you choose to honor your self-development.

however, as two hours pass, you find yourself more and more concerned that heeseung is not off doing what you think he’s doing. you verify this with lia, who states she hasn’t seen him for a while now. the growing concern eventually ruptures inside you and you drop everything to search for heeseung.

“heeseung?” you call as you shove your way through the house. “heeseung?”

you attempt to dial his number but your calls don’t go through. he never turns his phone off.

fuck.

“heeseung!” you shout as you meticulously scavenge the back and front yard. you become increasingly anxious that you’ve lost the boy — drunk and alone and with people you definitely don’t trust to take care of him. eventually, the time comes for when you decide to search the second storey, though your doubts are high.

when you’re at the foot of the stairs, your heart is hammering inside your chest. is he okay? it’s your one genuine concern, and it makes you furious at yourself for letting your jealousy get ahold of you. why the hell did you leave the party?

this is all your fault.

if anything happens to your boy, it will be all your fault.

climbing the stairs, you notice something odd. where the hell is your cup from before? there’s nobody here you know that would do any sort of cleaning, unless—

you sprint up the stairs and begin slamming open every door you see.

“heeseung?” you continuously echo into every room, finding silence on the receiving end. it’s almost unnerving, because if he’s not here then he’s not anywhere. it makes tears well in your eyes thinking about where he could be or if he’s feeling lost and scared.

that’s when you take notice of the remaining door at the end of the hallway.

“h-heeseung?” you approach the door, opening it.

the room is pitch dark, and at this time of night, the windows offer no shed of light. you see nobody on the bed, and though you almost close the door and leave, you halt at the sound of a soft whimper.

you freeze.

heeseung?

the room falls silent again, so you open the door a little wider. the light from your side now pours inside and you finally make out a figure sitting on the floor.

it’s slumped against the side of the bed, curled up and hugging its legs.

your heart falls into the pit of your stomach.

it’s heeseung.

and he’s crying.

“heeseung? oh my god.” you rush over toward him and fall to your knees, cupping his face in your hands as your chest swells with worry and distress. “are you okay? what happened? what’s wrong?”

your eyes dart everywhere across his features, taking in everything about his expression — his blood-shot eyes, the pink across the tip of his nose and his cheeks, and his tears streaming down his cheeks and now onto your fingers.

heeseung retracts from your touch and hiccups, dropping his face on his knees. at the cursory glance you’d made, you can tell he’s clearly intoxicated. he looks really unwell, but this is certainly not the result of just alcohol — he’s obviously upset about something.

“i-it’s me,” you attempt to placate him, placing a hand on his shoulder to rub his back before he flinches away from you.

“leave me alone.” he chokes out, his soft whisper jagged and broken. you stare in stunned silence, taken aback by his reaction. your head feels like it’s spinning.

“wh-what happened?” you question, mind racing as you attempt to fill in the blanks yourself. did someone hurt him? did someone say something to him? did—

your expression instantly darkens when you recall what had happened earlier. you’d hate to be right. you pray and pray and pray that this is a shot in the dark and your assumption is far too many steps ahead than reality.

“was it… ryujin?” you whisper, feeling your entire body tense.

at the sound of her name, you see him stiffen.

and it’s enough of an answer for you.

you feel fury thrash inside of you and compound in your core. your hands are shaky when you reach out to touch him but he instantly jerks away from you.

“she said something to you?” you whisper, shattered by this realisation.

he pauses before slowly nodding his head.

“just her?”

he shakes his head.

taehyun, that fucking rat bastard.

“i’ll fucking kill them.” you growl, standing up instantly. you’re livid. you can’t even begin to imagine what they’ve done to your boy, but you’re certain you won’t spare mercy. “i’m beat the shit out of them.” you rush to leave, but heeseung grabs your hand before you can go anywhere.

“you can have your puzzle back.” your little sun says. “i don’t want it anymore.”

to be continued.

*taglist is open, just comment or send an ask :>

a/n: hahahahahaha im sorry IM SORRY it was gna happen sooner or later but anyways i am once again BEGGING for ur forgiveness for such a late update; since the next chapter is the FINAL chapter, i will try my best ot be rlly quick. within the next 2 weeks hopefully? 3? anyway idek how i feel abt this final product or w/e but ya girl is ~tired~ and she's very excited to finish this series <33 thank you guys SOSOSOSO MUCH for all the love across the few months it took me to write this. can’t believe we have one more chapter left :< triage & triage!hee have a special place in my heart hehe, so thanks for being a part of this journey <333 anyway pls do support me via liking + reblogging if u can !! :>

#oH ALSO TO ADD ONTO THAT LONG ASS POST (IM SO SORRY) THE SCENE WHEN YN WAS FIXING HIS HAIR 🥺😳😳😳😳😳#GIRL I FELT THE TENSIONS SO FUCKING DEEP #AND WHEN HEESEUNG TOLD HER FO STOP #omg #omg just omg #i literally felt so in pain but ofc i knew why he did that but just in yns pov omgggg #BUT IT WAS SO 💖💖💖💖 UGH I LOVE THEM SO FUCKING MUCH #and yes ofc i still hate u 🤩😘🔪#you'll be getting a whole ass post after u complete this series #abt how much i loved this series and ofc how you are literally my favourite author and my fave person hehe #bUt FOR NOW I WISH U A VERY HAPPY FCK U 🙂😘😘😘😘😘#but all jokes aside u made my fucking day thank you so much for uodating #also take ur time with the last chapter and dong stress too much #sei yells !#sei's library #sei's favorites #i just realized i reblogged this on the wrong accoung #but UMM IDC??? EVERYONE READ THIS MASTERPIECE NOW⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️#anyways ily hehe

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whimsically-ominously-auspice · 5 years ago

Text

My "cycle code speak"

I developed with Bestie to avoid eavesdropping from others.

We talk then change the subject then go back to,the subject then off topic and back.

Its specialised.

On a very long post readers will lose information.

So bestie and i would speak less about the most important topic but feel the most.

We were always in public or someone was "bugging" us.

So im delighted to see that y'all understand how it works. Snoop had to call y'all out and help y'all,understand how y'all been on auto save to save the Planet.

And have the information posted at the bottom for y'all to simple get it.

I knew exactly how he needed to tell y'all cause,Alex was telling me first thing when i woke up from sleep just now. I said "highlight the information above"

And he had Tree copy and paste the highlighted information in the order I wrote.

One reason people didn't catch onto how they were saving the world is that didn't matter. They were simply being human.

But i appreciate that Snoop went out of his time and went for y'all to make sure you understand why.

1 as a thank you and 2 to help us understand how humans actually are and make that very clear that humans aren't abnormal. We're normal!

So what the contact communications code is is just like you write 3 articles and then you merge them together keeping all the information in order. Then you hit each topic.

Now. Bestie and i when long time no see or in dangerous territory (lots of nosy aliens around to harm) we shuffled the articles so it would be out of order.

So it would be complex and a lot of silence at our public dinner table in a restaurant. While we ourselves minded the information to our hearts to reorder the information into an order. In silence and leaving gaps of space to know we did beginning and end.

Aliens in human form. Usually men would get pissed off and leave the restaurant and cause a scene. Then after then we would go back and do the cycle in order. Because we were safer.

So none of us are stupid. We just dont know what is going on

I can't help but conversation code it.

It isn't any different than the family going around the dinner table talking about their day.

I would do it with my Uncle Dad. Denise was too stupid to,follow along,instead getting bugged I would,talk after everyone talked. So Chris,would,talk,i would say 2-3 sentences about my day and then Nathaniel would say something and i would,say,how i was counter acting his actions. But not allow anyone,but humans to,understand.

Very serious issues needed slight clarification to my Uncle Dad after. He would double check,my safety. After dinner in,the living room

Meaning safe and,handled,I went to my room,first.,not,then,directly to,the living room.

So I don't know how to be uncoded.

Even,things I,write straight forward. End,in cliff hangers or some thing. A cliff hanger,is a code,for "more to,come"

I can't really change that. I'm just an extreme expert at communication.

With bestie and i it became a blood sport. Often she would arrive before me and find aliens she wanted kill. And i would watch her face of anger and wait and develop conversations that way. I would follow her lead.

Otherwise my goal was to keep aliens stupid and then watch them. They would be happy from our information. Information that hurt her and I. So they would stand and catch me looking and sit for safety. Thus notifying my protection detail of CIA agents and they would label my face under kill.

My eyes would narrow then when I looked back to bestie my eyes would open wider. A more comforting honest tell me honey what's going on face.

Then i would Alien stretch my soul ... Aliens thinking it was my skin. To notify "I'm still looking. They're going to die. 'This isn't my territory style'" which was mild to extreme torture and removing the kidnapped kids from extraterrestrial custody.

Bestie hated it. Because she put her life on hold instead of holding bee soulmate in her arms.

Those days i would fill the restaurant with the spirit of love. Usually my bestie would be having a super bad day. It depended where we sat. That was my auto cue.

When Tommy would see my soulmate stretch to order kills he became extremely sad. Because he would realize he could just killed Amanda.

But I would reassure him that wouldn't have worked. It would bad the world unstable due to alien attacks. We would just Moshe pit kill them all in the end after giving them a choice to live right an s rigid on their home planets.

So i would tell him "just see her" but shes married and so am I! "Be friends till the end. I have come to see her and you will, too. Invite him bestie over to you for a BBQ. Get drunk have fun just as we used to do over our house (or i would say at my house)" she would grab her phone and text he would say "maybe" and i would say "let's talk about your problems. Let him know you're struggling as much as him but in a different way" he would show up over her house as "enlisted to lighten to load" help her deal with her life stress.

Y'all don't know but shes been my only "irl" friend for over 10 years. My only friend. I've lived a normal sane life like many of you that have been kidnapped and loaded down under. And just regular people and most especially aliens that want to remain hidden.

People come and go But my life as friendship in real life has only revolved around her. I'm not ashamed to have only one friend. The rest of the time i spent with my soulmate. So I've been happy as can be as a POW.

This is how i know the world needs extreme help. My life sucks and i hate it. The same reasons my bestie hates hers. Because she can't be with her lover.

And family IRL.

Otherwise and because of that sad days For her became revenge kill days.

We could only kill extraterrestrials if they were criminals. The same as an evil human. It kept the balance and the world safe from alien invasions for revenge.

We thank Weck's restaurant in their unique location that used to be the Red Balloon in Los Lunas. Red Balloon was also a yummy restaurant to eat at.

But it was an alien establishment and i ordered humans to take it over. Thereby thus combining fate and history into a native New Yorker tounge that doesn't pronounce the letter R. from "Wrecked that alien bitch" to simply "Weck's"

Red Balloon was code word for "Alien Safe Here"

I made sure they understood they are not.

Most went down to Roswell from the Albuquerque metro area.

Those visiting "the moon" didn't know we had taken it over and visited freely. Those we killed because it was a criminal safety net - the Red Balloon. 99% of aliens going to eat had done something very wrong like kidnapping humans.

The CIA wait staff knew they could tell when Bestie was sad... So it was back to the wall where the bad alien was or back to the wall where I could see what was going on. The wait staff set us told us where to sit.

So i would switch with Bestie every so often to see what she saw. Because my neck pain prevented looking. Often it was "im fucking leaving she keeps looking at me!!"

Like a human looked at a human.

Which was delightful because it proved they knew they were wrong. "Oh my God that is so funny!!"

Usually I found the humor. Often Alex and Tommy would have "invisible dinner talk" and Alex would advise Tommy to basically romance surprise her. Just show up at the house and Alex would volunteer to oversee to help guide Tommy to allow John to be his friend. My bestie's husband.

In this way he could be Uncle in his daughter's life. Because that was what hurt the most.

So we took better care of them than we did ourselves as is obvious.

Our right. Our ruling.

This is why I rarely tell my own feelings. Because most of y'all would feel bad or sad or responsible for helping.

So now I can tell. Because now I've began the mass exercising of moshing our demons to sleep.

But I had to ensure each American was safe first and I had amnesia.

So I had to beat and destroy the strongest aliens on my own. Aliens stronger than me.

David and Goliath.

Except me "Go lie" I am goliath. Because that is my orders.

"Duh I've did" they told me. The weakling.

"Good" I'd say "let it continue. Disobey the 10 commandments. I can't stop you and that isn't my job any way"

My job is to kill. Force surrender. And destroy if they don't

I had to become an archangel. That was always a man's job. Always Alex's. No one but him has been an archangel until 2003 when Declan became one.

Then 2006 when Bestie did.

And now me and there are several others.

To honor bestie. Alex has given up the title of Archangel Michael.

Its a masculine form of her name and it would indicate they're lovers.

He has planned to enlist all his archangel titles under Archangel Gaberial. Gabriel is the masculine form. Spelling Gaberial without the -ia entitles it to be "for the woman". Me.

So no one shall name their sons Gabe. Gaberial or Gabriel or any spelling of such name. For men and hermaphrodite

However they shall be allowed to name their daughters and hermaphrodites "Gaberialla" in honor of me and in understanding he has already protected their right to live.

Any spelling. The above spelling notices "I am your Cinderella, Arch Angel Gaberial, I hereby dutify myself to your spirit to fight for the safety of all humans thereby all consequences shall be none."

When a child gets baptized that is what is said

Now consequences shall be none... Means eternal death to all alien invaders thus allowing earth to be free and clear from painful consequences caused by alien invasions.

Thus it is a choice a parent can not make.

"I am a Gaberialla" says a female voice. "I, too, am a Gaberialla" follows a deeper male voice.

This is allowed by Jesus.

$5 for who can answer "what does the term gaberialla replace in our new society?"

Here's your hint: 3 letter word

Thus at my Jesus Cult wedding. Many times "ahh boo!!" Startling and scary. Those of you that come to realize you've enjoyed fighting the alien nation will have the right to become an archangel Gaberial assistant. To follow many rules of the American Nation.

Because my soulmate has had issues in this lifetime to know who his friends are. Who has his back and who doesn't.

Many of our CIA we use Now will set to retire. Because i said to. Never will the skills or talent accumulated will to to waste. But its time to enjoy new jobs and new lives.

Not anytime soon. But eventually. For now the war must continue.

The spelling remains the same but it is pronounced "arc-Angel" a promise to provide the world with the rainbows the "arch-angels" have always dreamed of.

And also ark of thereby Noah whom is also me. Because we will all be Christianed upon an arch

I will with Tom, Alex and Andrew will bless the bestie to become the first female archangel in known existence in the 3 galaxies I've created with Alex.

Then she with Alex, Tommy, Frederick will then bless all the archangels into existence. Which will include me as we all bow to her feet Muslim style into prayer.

She is also the only known Full bloodied Scorpio on this planet. All the planets were perfectly aligned,,including the moon the night she was born. To be a 100% true and divine Scorpio.

So when you want to know more about her, google astrology sign SCORPIO.

And you will see how easy it was for us to devise the secret communication coded language that didn't beat Navajo code but was simply in time line as good as. She also as a reincarnate invented many codes throughout her 864,922,386,401 lives.

Like Candy she is one of my unknown daughters. Created from my spirit of war.

**Not Christina Hendricks aka Chandler - she is known from my womb in this lifetime. But another Candy. A Candy from the spirit of motherhood. A true 100% divine and perfection true Cancer. She is out of body. She too will be an archangel. Archangel Uril is Another name Alex will give up. Spelled Ariul. sounds like Aerial

To learn about her google the astrological sign Cancer. A video has been produced to know why her symbol is the crab. It was posted yesterday.

Her voice is in Charlie Brown indistinguishable due to the water. In the Muppet Babies the mom/nanny is also her. And in Loony Tunes the old gramma with the broom with Sylvester and Tweety.

Ariel is her learning about love. From me. Ursula. Its not based on a true story. It is the real story.

So I hope this has all made you pleased. Unworried for the future. And you resume your toilet paper gathering for current use and paper mache upon our return to land.

Toilet paper requires no glue unlike other paper. So it is perfect for paper mache dolls to create to burn while thinking of aliens.

Extraterrestrial are the biggest hoarders of them all.

So it will be all gathered and then given away since its already been bought from the factory repaid to the store for allowing purchases to be made easier from factories and then upscaled in pricing to pay for the religious experience of shopping.

Retail therapy is part of the True Jesus (me) religion.

Now please pray for my forgiveness and hope I can be with my true lover Soon.

Remember I got $5 on it that you read and understood what all I've just said.

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