#im NEVER gonna have the willpower to do it but holy SHIT!!!!!

[moistcl1tikal-ao3]

im gonna say this and im gonna stand by this,

life would be so much better if men could knot. like i want charlie LITERALLY balls deep inside me. PLEASE.

yeah. so yeah im. yeah

college roommate!charlie x cisfem reader. knotting and desperation ahead. omegaverse too. obviously

this is a part 1 because im getting pulled to do stuff I promise ill write the knotting later

The apartment was weirdly silent when you got back from class. Normally, since it was Thursday, your roommate was cooped up in his room streaming. You didn't really mind the idea of having a streamer roommate - at least, not one like Charlie. He was actually funny. Besides, free meals from TreatStream was a decent perk, all things considered. (Once you'd been convinced nobody would show up to your house from it other than literally the delivery drivers.)

But today, no laughter and bad puns were heard through the thin door of Charlie's room. The door was shut, but as soon as you stepped more than a few feet into your apartment the absolute smell of the place hit you.

Everything here absolutely stank of Charlie.

Your cheeks went red as the implications smacked you in the face. You didn't know your roommate.... well, they always said it was the goofy ones. With those arms and how boisterous he was, it actually made a lot of sense that he was an alpha. Strong.

Good to mate with.

Woah?

Something deep inside of you was already straining at your willpower. It wasn't like you were some freshly presented blushing omega, but holy shit, you needed to open a window.

Except... you'd always had a teeny tiny bit of a thing for your goofy, adorable, funny as hell and twice as hot roommate, and Charlie was... practically begging for it, right? He could have warned you. If he'd never been this bad before, clearly he wanted you to find out, right? Wanted you to have his scent coating the insides of your nose, worming down into your lungs and making your entire body warm.

You approached his room, toeing your shoes off, setting your backpack down and knocking on the door.

"Hey, Charlie, you okay in there?"

You heard a shuffling around, then the gangly form of Charlie appeared behind a crack in the door. The scent grew even stronger. You could see he'd just thrown his hoodie on, and there was no shirt underneath. His hair was a mess, his glasses weren't even on, and he was barely peeking around the edge of the door.

"Not feeling great, honestly-- kinda uhh," He sniffed to try and appear sick, but instead got a whiff of your own mild scent. You barely even had one, as far as you were aware, but with him like this... you probably smelled fucking delicious. "Kinda coming down with something--"

"Do you need any help?" The words tumbled out of your mouth without you meaning to, and your already hot face went even hotter. "I mean-- do you need anything, like can I--"

Charlie stared down at you, eyes flicking back to look at something in his room before looking down at you. "Look, it's not--"

Both of you stopped talking to blink at each other, the tension starting to thicken quicker than either of you could come up with a joke to cut it.

You decided to be the one to make the move, placing a hand on the doorknob. "...If you're open to it... I'd be willing to help you out. Just... Y'know, as a friends thing."

Charlie's brain seemed to short for a few seconds before he nodded. "Okay-- okay. If you're cool with it. I fucked up and missed my suppressant prescription and I haven't had one of these since like, middle school so it's-- okay it might. It might be bad. I--" His eyes flicked back and forth again.

"It might get a liiiittle rough."

You took a deep breath, infecting your mind even further with the warm, musky, addicting scent of your roommate.

"I can handle it. I'm on the pill, too, so you can--"

The door opened further and you were dragged into Charlie's room by your wrist. He was in literally just the hoodie and some loose boxer shorts, the window wide open and letting the cool air in. Well, the boxers would be loose, but he was completely tenting them out, making them tight as could be. As soon as you were inside the room you shut the door behind you and it was on, Charlie pulling you in and locking his lips against your own. You let out a little hum and grabbed at his hoodie, gripping onto it tightly. You pulled back to mumble about taking it off and he complied, breaking away from you to pull it off with one clean motion. His muscles rippled as he did, tight stomach flexing and triceps bulging as he bent his arms.

You made the approach as soon as he was free of his hoodie, your palms colliding with his chest to push him onto the bed. Sure, you felt a little bad for getting to indulge your crush all because Charlie had fucked up his rut medication schedule but with the way he outright arched into your touch, his feverish hot skin against your fingers... you just couldn't care. You pulled off your shirt, leaving you in just a bra. You would have taken your pants off too, but Charlie had already grabbed you and pulled you down to the bed. Your crotch slotted against his hips and you could feel the throbbing cock beneath you. Charlie let out an utterly pathetic little whimper and you grinned, settling your hands onto his shoulders.

"You're really hot like this, y'know."

"I mean, I do get fevers when I'm--"

"Oh, my god shut up," you giggled, kissing him again. His hands started to roam up your body, feeling over your waist before moving down to keep moving your hips against his own. You idly mumbled a "holy shit" as you looked down, staring at the huge wet spot already starting to stain his underwear.

"Please don't stop moving," Charlie's big blue eyes stared up at you and you couldn't help but kiss him again.

"How about you fuck me instead, then?" You grinned down at him, grinding down hard. You were already starting to soak through your underwear - sure, you weren't some blushing omega, but you were still going to react. Biological imperative, and all that. Being on birth control didn't hamper your own instincts, after all. "C'mon, Char. Why don't you use those big, strong arms to pin me down and--"

Your taunt was his command. The next thing you knew, you were lying on your back on the bed, Charlie's hands yanking at your leggings and underwear to pull them off all in one fell swoop. Your face went red as a string of your own fluids connected to the crotch of your underwear, snapping and landing on your thigh to shine in the ambient light from the window. Immediately, Charlie's eyes shot to it, and after throwing your pants to the floor he dove for your thigh.

His tongue rasped up the soft skin, nose diving into the crease of your hip and thigh to trail along the scent patches there. The spot was so sensitive, and you just couldn't help the moan that rolled out of your mouth. Charlie laid down on his stomach, wrapping his toned arms around your thighs and pushing his face into your pussy. He let out an audible groan as he buried his face in you, sucking and licking at the sensitive skin to try and swallow down all of your fluids. You wrapped your legs around his head, hands grabbing his messy hair and gripping it tightly. Arching up, you could see that he was grinding into the bed, clearly desperate but just aching to taste you.

"Charlie-- Charlie, fuck, please," you gasped as his teeth grazed your clit, the extra gentle bit of friction driving you crazy. You needed his teeth digging into your most sensitive spots immediately. "Please mark me. I fucking need it, holy shit!"

Like a proper gentleman, he obeyed, but like a true alpha, he was fucking brutal in the execution. He pulled his lips off of your aching, swollen clit to sink his sharp canines into your inner thigh. You cried out, legs trembling as you bucked up into the stimulation that was no longer there.

"If I'm gonna mark you," he mumbled around a mouthful of your thigh, "I'm gonna mark all of you," Charlie pulled off and moved his head to target your other thigh, using his arms to keep you spread open even when your legs wanted to squeeze around him.

"And I'm gonna do it properly."

[scummy-writes]

[CHAPTER 24 + PREM]

Two chaps left letsaaa goooo hahahahaha cries

-> opens up with her talking about his book. Its rehashing the same details.

-> i am in pain realizing that the books were also for him.

So now I am torn. Were these books something he wrote to console himself, because he thought he would never meet her, and he hoped these books were something she would take enjoyment in. A way of spilling his wants, old hopes, and dreams without directly doing so.

Or were these books made for her to keep having hope, to encourage her in his own way. To see if she would think more of herself, and feel treasured in an odd way.

Or both?

Argh. Im in agony and we're like 10 or 15 lines in.

-> in the meeting with luke and gil, she calls him out on how hes conflicted on his plan, since he wont give them the bullets just yet, and is giving her time to resolve this.

-> 'Flight of fancy' i like his word choices

Fyi, its a bottomless pit symbolizing his stomach. If you look closely, you can see the thousands of cookies she's baked (jk)

Why is he suddenly in his dressed down sprite?

The tantalizing touches of reminding you that gilbert's heart is a ticking timebomb

-> gilbert gives her until the end of that day to decide if shes gonna kill him

-> why does luke stroll in with a casual 'heya'. Im mad that we both say that.

-> missed a comment about how gilbert is good at finding weaknesses, then poking and prodding until they....get angry and boom? Damnit

The wonders of having the confidence of Big Dick Is Back In Town will do.

Fuel for [censored] hcs

-> this is all one big hashing out of how she loves gilbert. Lukes having to point it all out.

Luke also points out that its not blind faith or trust, she still has her own ideals and willpower, so its still Her.

I am realizing gilbert probably gets huffy about the soldiers and such putting so much trust and such into him because some of them may be doing it blindly, and not going by their own willpower.

Which. Sounds odd since theyre lower rank and blah blah. But you know what i mean. He doesnt want just a nation of blind devotees.

Love that luke is mr perceptive here.

-> "No ones gonna ask someone they hate to kill them, are they?"

....

HAHA

Also imagining gil and emma having sex, and during the foreplay shes teasing him and going "oh? Is that it? Some villain you are" and gilbert kickin it into high gear HAHA

-> "mr.spy, are you there?" Emma i love you

-> love that lucien is.... like chev in some ways. Meanwhile roderic is only like gilbert in looks.

Nighttime town

-> I WILL KILL HIM

-> grey and clammy face as description

-> okay he didnt slink off here to die(?)

Shakes you shakes you shakes you shakes you

ARRRGGGHHHHHHHH

-> his grip is still somehow tight? Really is walking contradictions.

-> they did comment in chap 3 or smth that gilbert has a hard time controlling his force/strength since hes never. Really touched people caringly in Years.

IM BASHING YOUR HEAD IN

Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you

[PREMIUM]

Holy shit its starts off with a flashback of walter explaining gilberts illness, and he describes it as a bomb HAHAHA oh my joke from earlier...ahah....still hurts

-> the lights are suddenly on in this place.

-> gilbert knew lucien was around, threatens her if she tries to call him, says he'll still have her killed

-> also says hes the only one allowed to do so.

-> i could kick you like a football in your current state, Gilbert

-> i am overcompensating with jokes so I do not burst into tears at how she loves him so much shes going to literally drag him to the castle to get treatment, and so she can still be with him if he dies along the way.

-> clannad moment

-> smart to strip the outerlayers so he wont have to try and kill civilians if the realize who he is

-> he must enjoy going into town and pretending like he is a normal person without having to worry about ending corruption. God damnit.

-> hard to move him, says he is heavy due to muscle. This twink.

-> motherfucker closed the door to demand to know why shes saving him outside of trying to save Rhodolite

-> mc he just wants to hear that you love him before he dies i am going to fuxking scream

PUNCHES WALL PUNCHES WALL PUNCHES WALL AAAHSJWBWKEHKSLWHSJSBDBDJWJYSHWJW ARHDGAHSHSGH

-> flashback to her first night in obsidian and hes getting jealous shes paying attention to his bookshelves and not him. Im going to go feral

-> "wow, you're as red as the sunset sky" emma you should have clocked that he was a writer from that line alone

-> yahoo hes shoving her onto the bed and teasing her for thinking he wanted sex. Cool cool. Meanwhile present day he is DYING AND I CANT ENJOY THIS

-> comes back to the present with realizing that he looked so sad when he said he just wanted to keep tormenting her forever, was because he was going to die soon.

-> i hate this fucking game

-> she points out in an inner monolog that she doesnt believe gilberts ever lived for himself

-> "i dont want to be lonely either" slams my fucking phone against a rock

-> why does lucien know walter

-> i hate this fucking game

DRAMATIC END - GILBERT ROUTE SPOILERS POST

Like the other notes (here), I am continuing my thoughts/notes on Gilbert's route. This post will focus on the dramatic end + premiums. His povs will be a separate post.

I'll be reblogging this post each chapter or so with personal thoughts and general screaming under a cut. I'll be having it in a format with the chapter numbered, and then a cut directly after where I'll be yelling. I already know some major spoilers with gilberts route, so if you have not finished his route yet, be wary.

I'll be using the tags 'Scum Simps' and 'scum plays gil route' for those of you who want to filter it out. Thank u!

[mjm56-a]

at this point i should just .  start a yaku//za multi because i have so many muses i want to write + a yak//uza-centric oc and im

[viostormcaller]

Stringbound Chapter 2

[TW: nausea/vomiting, near car accident, needles, fainting (ask to tag if I’ve missed something!)]

AN: This has been ready for a good while, actually! I just haven’t posted it since I’ve been away. However, since it’s Marvin’s birthday, I thought it fitting to post this today. So, happy birthday, Marvin, and I duly apologize for the awful things that happen to you in this chapter. Now, without further ado, here’s chapter 2!

Read Chapter 1

As the tension finally dissipated from the theatre, Marvin could finally feel that the threat was gone. It was just them now. At first, he let himself calm down and relax while Jackieboy Man called whoever it was he needed to call and informed them on the situation. But then, it hit him all at once, just as the adrenaline from the fight wore off. A dizzying, blinding headache accompanied by ringing ears and followed by a nosebleed. His body began to ache and he felt nauseated and overwhelmed, skin prickling all over. He overdid it, he definitely overdid it. Normally he would take a moment to rest after a show because he needs to recharge after expending his magical energy, despite the amount he uses never being a significant amount. His shows not only never take much out of him, but they also never involve combat, especially when it's an overpowered, unkillable enemy. He actually hadn't fought anyone using magic in a long, long time. Hadn't needed to. He fell to his knees with a grunt, holding his head and groaning.

Jackieboy Man startled when he heard the thump, looking behind him to see Marvin doubled over on his knees. He cursed to himself and put whoever it was he was talking to on hold. "Shit, you alright?!"

"Overdid it," he got out. "Too much-- ngh! Energy…"

"Are you injured anywhere else?" Jackieboy Man asked.

"Nn-nnh," Marvin shook his head. Instant regret. His body lurched and he clapped a hand over his mouth, his eyes beginning to sting. He swallowed thickly and slowly exhaled. "Don' feel well… gonna be sick…"

"Okay, shit, uh… you'll come with me, you can lie down and rest, um… D'you need anythin' else or are you alright?"

"Lie down… 'n a shower… 's it…"

"Alright, gotcha."

"I'll give you… my address. You c'n take me home…"

"Ah… no, can't do that. Sorry. You'll have to stay with me. Not safe with Antisepticeye after you now."

"I can... handle myself," Marvin forced out, his frustration making his head hurt worse. "'m a grown adult. Don' need protecting."

"No, trust me on this one. Please." Jackieboy urged. "I know what I'm talking about. I'm not having anyone else go missing or fall deathly ill under his control, not on my watch. And you're weakened, on top of that. You have to come with me. I've rigged the house in a way where he can't find me or anyone else who stays there. You'll be safe there until the heat's off you."

"...fine," Marvin agreed begrudgingly. Jackieboy Man sounded sincere enough, and the hero did appear to have more experience with Antisepticeye than he did. But mostly, the sooner he could lie down, the better, and at this point he would do anything to speed things along.

"First, though," Jackieboy began, fishing through one of his satchels.

Marvin groaned. Ugh, what now, he thought to himself, clearly annoyed.

Jackieboy Man held out a tissue to Marvin. "Your nose is bleeding."

"Mmh." Right. Aside from the metallic taste coating his lips, he'd nearly forgotten. He pressed the napkin to his nose and pinched it, tilting his head back. His nosebleeds never lasted long, thankfully, so as soon as it stopped a moment later, he was able to shakily rise onto his feet. Though, the dizziness struck back hard, nearly causing him to fall over again.

"Woah, careful! You alright?" Jackieboy asked, rushing over to steady him.

"Mmh… thanks."

"No problem. Y'know…" Jackieboy couldn't help but smirk, "considering you seem to have a connection to cats, I assumed you'd have better balance than that!"

Marvin furrowed his brow and narrowed his eyes at Jackieboy Man, giving him a "what the actual fuck are you talking about?" face.

"Your cat mask?" Jackieboy supplied.

Marvin rolled his eyes and sucked his teeth, turning his gaze away from the hero. "Shut up."

Jackieboy snorted. "Alright, let's get you somewhere safe. Friend of mine should be waiting outside by now. He'll drive us. You don't get carsick, do you?"

"No."

"Good. Alright, easy does it, now… slow steps."

Jackieboy Man slowly led Marvin out through the exit door he sawed open earlier on. They headed through the hallway leading out to the main doors and were hit with the cold night air as they stepped outside. The bright city lights were glaring, making Marvin's eyes hurt. He hissed and shut them, feeling his head pound harder. The cold air was cooling down his overheating body, at least, but he could tell he would be shivering before long.

"That white car over there is where we're headed," Jackieboy Man informed. "My friend -- his name's Chase -- he'll be taking us back to the house."

"Mmh."

"You're really clammy," Jackieboy commented. "Sure you're not comin' down with something?"

"Jus' overdid it…" Marvin got out. "I'll be fine."

"There's a doctor that lives with us. He can check you out if you want?" Jackieboy Man offered.

"Mmh." Marvin really didn't feel like seeing a doctor, nor did he need to, but he also didn't feel like talking anymore. He figured the hero would shut up if he just nodded and agreed. Plus, the sooner he stopped talking, the better, because the nausea was hitting Marvin full force and the last thing he wanted to do was open his mouth to speak, lest more than words came out.

Finally, the pair finally made it to the car. Jackieboy Man helped Marvin in first, who scooted all the way towards the left-most seat, while Jackieboy sat on the far right. Marvin took the opportunity to pull his mask off his face and set it down in the empty space between them.

"Yo, Jackie, everything good?" asked the driver, who Marvin assumed was Chase. "And who's this you got with you?"

"Yeah, Chase, we're fine. Oh, and this is Marvin," explained Jackie. He then turned to Marvin. "Wait, your name is Marvin, right? I was just goin' off the sign on the theatre."

"Yeah, name's Marvin." he mumbled, trying not to open his mouth too much.

"Ah, okay. Good. Yeah, he was targeted at his show tonight. I'm takin' him back with us to stay 'til the heat's off 'im."

"Yeah, alright." Chase sighed. The house was big, sure, but if Jackie kept taking on new people like this… well, he supposed it was for the best. "So, uh… we heading straight back? Or d'you need to stop anywhere first?"

"Nah, just head straight home. Marvin needs to lie down and rest. But drive slow, alright? He's not feeling well."

"Yeah, alright. He injured?"

"No, no. Thankfully he's not. I'll explain later, but he just needs to find someplace to lie down."

"Alright. Everyone buckled in?"

"Yeah, I am. Marv, you buckled?"

"Mhm," Marvin hummed.

"Alright, starting the car now."

Chase pulled out of his parking spot and began to drive off. True to his word, he kept his speed slow, but Marvin could still feel every jerk and bump of the car. He had his head leaned against the window, taking slow, deep breaths, his eyes closed.

"Hey, Marvin?"

"Mmh?" Marvin slightly turned his head towards Jackie's direction.

"You see that pocket on the back of Chase's seat? There's paper bags in there. Keep 'em there just for situations like this. If you feel like you're gonna be sick, don't be afraid to take one, alright?"

Marvin hummed in acknowledgement, going back to closing his eyes. He was trying with all his willpower to settle his stomach as much as he possibly could. He didn't want to resort to using a bag, but he'd be mortified if he threw up in someone else's car. Gods, he hoped he could lie down soon…

Chase was paying close attention to the road, trying to watch his speed and make sure he wasn't driving too fast and not too slow, that he was in the correct lane, when suddenly a car from the complete opposite side of the freeway came barreling at him from his left. He spotted it just in time, largening headlights near blinding him.

"Holy shit!" Chase cried. He rapidly turned the wheel, speeding up to try and get out of the way. Jackie cried out from the back seat and held on tight to the handle on the roof of the car as it swerved and collided with the guardrail, the screech of metal on metal filling the car. Marvin groaned and hissed as his stomach flip-flopped and his head bumped hard up against the window. The other car thankfully missed, and aside from the car scraping against the guardrail, nothing was damaged and no one was severely hurt. He turned on the hazard lights and quickly pulled over, trying hard to catch his breath and calm his heart. His entire body was trembling.

"Shit… you guys… you guys alright back there?" he got out between pants.

"Yeah… think we're good," Jackie said. "Shit, man, what happened?"

"Dude, someone tried to fuckin' hit us."

"Shit, you serious?"

"Yes!" Chase turned around in his seat to face Jackie, eyes wide with fear. "Dude, I swear to god, this car came from the other fuckin' side of the freeway and came charging right at us, like it was trying to hit us. Coulda killed all three of us if I didn't move out of the way!"

"You… you don't think it was a drunk driver, do you?" suggested Jackie.

"Nah, man, that felt way too deliberate to be a drunk driver. It looked like whoever was driving was targeting us."

"...Well, then we better get home fast," Jackie said. "If the road's not safe, then we gotta get outta harm's way."

"R-right, right…" Chase turned back around to slump in his seat and took a deep breath, calming himself. He was still shaking, but he knew he had to get everyone home. They couldn't sit there forever. He reluctantly turned off the hazard lights and, after waiting for all the cars to pass, slowly veered the car back onto the freeway.

Marvin, meanwhile, had a hand over his stomach, feeling it turn and bubble. Throughout Jackie and Chase's conversation, he was desperately trying to fend off the nausea with little success. As the minutes passed by it only became worse. His breathing grew quick, jaw clenched as he tried with all his willpower to keep whatever wanted to come up, down.

"Marvin?" Jackieboy asked frantically, turning to Marvin with a worried look in his eyes as soon as he'd noticed his breathing had picked up. "Marvin, are you okay?"

Marvin didn't answer. His brow was furrowed, sweat beading on his forehead. He hated feeling this way. He hated nausea, the way his entire body prickled with it. He swallowed thickly and tried to steady his breathing, but swallowing triggered his nausea further. He gagged once and then finally his stomach lurched, bile rushing up his throat. Marvin quickly sat upright, clapping one hand over his mouth and using the other to reach out and open up a paper bag. Against his will his stomach lurched again, body convulsing, more bile filling his mouth and spilling out into his hand. He got the bag opened, and no sooner had he done so did he heave, vomiting into it.

"Get it up, Marvin, it's alright. I've got you," Jackie supported.

Marvin felt a hand on his back, rubbing in slow circles. He almost wanted to shrug him off but didn't have the mental energy to, not while also focusing on expelling whatever it was his body was so kind as to reject.

"Marvin's throwing up back there?" Chase called from up front.

"Yeah. Don't worry, none got in the car if that's what you're worried about." Jackie answered.

"Is he okay?"

"Uh… gonna say no on that one. He doesn't look like he's doin' too hot. How far are we from the house?"

"Uh, give or take twenty minutes?"

"Alright. Hang on 'til then, Marv. Okay?"

Marvin groaned, breath hitching as he was stopped up short by another wave of nausea. His head felt like it was being squeezed by a really tight rubber band, only worsening as he coughed and gasped. He wanted nothing more than to lie down somewhere, curl up into a ball and just sleep. When the nausea for the most part subsided, stomach empty of all it had and then some, he went back to leaning against the window, taking slow breaths as he tried to calm his heart and his breathing down.

Finally, Chase was pulling into a driveway. Marvin couldn't see as his eyes were closed, but he felt the car slowing down and heard the sound of tires against gravel. The engine whirred to a stop, the car filling with silence. Finally, there was the sound of Chase unbuckling his seatbelt and the silence was accompanied by cold air as his door was opened.

Chase naturally went outside to inspect the damage. It looked pretty bad… but it could have easily been a whole lot worse. He tried to be grateful for that. He could only force out a breath, running his hand through his hair. He knew he couldn't afford to pay to fix this right now, so he only hoped that this was all the damage that was done.

Jackieboy simply watched Chase from his window for a moment before turning towards Marvin. His eyes were closed and his breathing was awfully… still. "Marvin…?" he whispered. Was he asleep?

"Mmh?" Marvin hummed, not looking up.

"We're home."

"Mm…"

"Need me to help you out of the car?"

Jackieboy didn't get an answer. He hummed to himself and got out, going over to Marvin's side and opening the door. He unbuckled the seatbelt holding him and went to help Marvin up.

Marvin allowed himself to be helped up, but as soon as he moved, the world began to spin dangerously. His vision rapidly blurred and darkened and he collapsed, feeling a quick burst of pain shoot up his arm and through his side as he collided with the pavement beneath him, and then nothing.

"Shit, Marvin?! Marvin, are you okay?" Jackie cried out, bending down. He began to shake him. "Marvin? Marvin! Shit… Chase, Marvin's not responding. Go inside and get Schneep. Hurry!"

"Fuck, dude… yeah, on it!" Chase quickly locked the car before dashing towards the house, nearly tripping on the front steps and almost dropping his keys trying to unlock the door.

"Henrik!" Chase called into the house. "Henrik, where are you, man?" He was met with silence. With a slightly-annoyed huff, he headed straight towards a door on the right side of the hallway ahead of him and quickly threw it open, hurrying down the basement stairs. He finally reached the basement door at the bottom and burst through.

"Henrik," Chase repeated.

"Hm?!" Henrik startled, looking up from the paperwork on his desk and quickly swiveling around in his chair.

"Hen, we need you outside. Someone we're helping fuckin' passed out on the ground."

"Oh, für die Liebe zu…" Henrik huffed and rolled his eyes. He didn't hesitate in standing, though, immediately pulling on his white lab coat that was hanging nearby and grabbing a fresh pair of medical gloves. "Take me to them," he directed.

Chase nodded. The pair of them rushed back up the stairs and out the door, and Chase led Henrik over to where Jackie was, leaned over Marvin's unconscious form.

"What happened? Who is this?" Henrik asked, crouching down beside the stranger's limp body.

"His name's Marvin. He's staying with us until the heat's off him. He was attacked at his show tonight. By you-know-who."

Henrik hummed and slowly nodded in grim understanding. He had no qualms helping this stranger now, now that he had context. "What happened before he collapsed? What symptoms was he having?"

"Uh… he was really clammy, he was nauseous…"

"Was he vomiting?"

"Yeah, he was, though I should mention that was only after the car swerved. Uh… he said he had a headache and his nose was bleeding earlier. I think he said he just overdid it and used too much magic energy? But I still hoped you would check him out anyway, just to be sure."

"Magic? You serious?" Chase asked disbelievingly.

"Yeah, man, another magic user. You shoulda seen it, though. Marvin's powerful."

"Ugh, enough of the chit-chat," scolded Henrik impatiently. "Help me get Marvin inside. Is cold out here and I do not want him getting hypothermia."

"Right, right. Sorry." Jackie apologized.

The three of them lifted Marvin, and while it was awkward, they managed to safely get him inside. After removing his cape, suit jacket, and shoes, they set him down on the couch for now, piling blankets over him and setting pillows underneath his head. Afterwards Jackie and Chase sat themselves at the kitchen table and Henrik heated up the food he'd been saving for them -- he'd eaten his own plate earlier.

"So," Henrik grunted as he sat down in his chair. "You had said the car swerved while you were driving, yes? What happened?"

"Someone… someone tried to hit us," Chase replied.

"Tried to hit you? Are you certain?"

Chase grimly nodded, swallowing what was in his mouth. "Yeah, pretty certain, dude. Car came at us from the opposite side of the freeway. I had to swerve outta the way. Car hit the guardrail, dunno if you saw the damage."

"Yes, I… I saw." Henrik fell silent, mulling this over. "I assume you did not get a license plate, did you?"

Chase shook his head sadly.

"I figured as much. Did you get a look at the driver, at least?"

"No. Headlights were so bright that I couldn't see anything. I mean, shit, it was dumb luck I was able to get us outta the way at all!"

"If the damage is bad enough I might have to be called in to help clean up debris and help the survivors, if that car hit anyone else," Jackie said, his voice having a serious edge to it.

"No, I think you are fine, Jackieboy," Henrik said with a shake of his head. "If they needed help cleaning up, they would have called earlier. Maybe the car did not hit any other drivers?"

"I can only hope."

The three fell silent then, Henrik simply watching over Chase and Jackieboy Man as they ate. Finally, Chase spoke up, setting his fork down.

"...I'm pretty sure there's only one person who would have it out for us enough to try and hit us."

"It… it couldn't have been him," Jackie said. "I dunno where he fucked off to, but… we did really heavy damage to him."

Henrik blinked. This was news. "You… you did? What did you do?"

"It was…" Jackie huffed, laughing silently. "It was mostly Marvin, if I'm gonna be honest. He's really fuckin' powerful, you guys have no idea. Who knows how long he's been eyeing Marvin for, with that kinda strength…"

"Mm, we could use someone like him, then," Henrik said.

"At one point, um… I thought he killed him."

Both Henrik's and Chase's eyes widened.

"Dude… you serious?"

"Swear on my Ma. He was… he was out for a good minute. Had a hole blasted through the center of his skull. But, uh… apparently, he can't die."

Henrik's brow furrowed. "What… what do you mean, "he cannot die?""

"I mean that… he's not alive in the first place. I guess he… never was. Which means I need to look at a different approach to taking him out."

Chase just silently cursed to himself, slumping back in his chair and dragging a hand down his face.

"I do have good news, though!" Jackieboy quickly added. "You know those prototype bullets I've been workin' on? They work! They're pretty effective! If I make 'em a bit stronger, who knows how much damage they'll do!"

"Good, good! So we have a starting point for building defense, then," Henrik said with a relieved smile.

"Seems so, yeah."

Finally, Jackie looked over to Marvin, who was knocked out on the couch.

"So… what are we doing with Marvin?"

"...Well, the only option is for him to sleep on the couch," Henrik said. "Chase has his room, you are using mine, and I sleep down in the lab… the only place left is the living room."

"Guess you're right…"

"I am going to watch over Marvin for the night, make sure he is alright. Are either of you injured, by the way?"

"Nah, I'm good," Jackie shook his head.

"Same here," agreed Chase. "Little shaken up, but I'm all good otherwise."

"Good, good."

"Wait, shouldn't you be by Jack?" asked Jackie.

"I mean, yes, but as of right now, Marvin is the priority. If he is sick, I need to be there in case he gets any worse."

"I can go watch Jack," Chase offered.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, man. I mean…" Chase laughed, "I'm probably not gonna be sleeping tonight, anyways. Might as well do something useful, yeah?"

Jackie nodded and rose. "I'm gonna head upstairs and write everything that happened tonight down, and then head to bed so I can get an early start tomorrow. Gonna head out on patrols in the morning instead of at night just in case his puppets are on the loose. After tonight, can't be too cautious."

"That is a good idea, Jackie. I will be in the living room. Chase, if you notice anything that is not right with Jack during the night, we will swap places. I will go down to be with Jack and you will watch Marvin. Does that sound good?"

"Yeah, sounds good to me." Chase rose as well, grabbing his plate.

"Oh, do not worry about the dishes. I will do them. You two both go."

"Thanks, dude," smiled Chase.

"Yeah, thanks, Schneep. Owe you one." Jackie was about to head upstairs, but a final glance at Marvin reminded Jackie of something important. "Oh shit. Chase, wait, need a favor from you."

"Yeah? What's up?"

"Go down to the car and grab Marvin's mask. It's in the back seat."

"Yeah, got it." Chase pulled his keys out of his pocket and headed for the door, pulling it open and stepping outside.

Jackie headed upstairs while Chase was gone, while Henrik proceeded to wash the plates and utensils. When Chase came back, he set Marvin's mask on the coffee table and headed downstairs to watch over Jack. Once the dishes were done, Henrik headed to the living room to get comfy in one of the reclining chairs opposite and to the right of the couch and proceeded to watch over Marvin during the night. Eventually, though, he fell asleep.

                                                                  ⁂

Marvin groaned as he awoke. His head was still throbbing, his body ached, his middle was sore… He always felt like shit after expending so much energy. This was normal, but it didn't make it any less unpleasant. He went to move his arms so he could sit up and hold his head, but the first thing he was made aware of was the pile -- not one, but an actual, literal pile -- of blankets covering him. He opened his eyes to find that he was on a couch in an unfamiliar living room. Off to his right, he detected the faint sound of someone snoring. It was someone he didn't recognize, sporting skewed glasses and a white lab coat, still detectable despite the darkness of the room. A scientist, perhaps? Or, wait, Jackieboy Man mentioned they lived with a doctor. This must be him. Marvin reasoned he was responsible for covering him in so many blankets. He made a mental note to thank him when he woke up.

Marvin pushed the blankets off of him and pulled himself up off the couch. He spotted his mask sitting on the nearby coffee table. He wondered who brought it inside, considering he didn't grab it before he passed out. Well, better here than in the car, he figured. He couldn't afford to lose that mask; it meant a great deal to him. Pulling himself from his thoughts, he headed out of the living room, trying to make his way around this new environment and memorize its layout so he knew where to go should there ever be danger. Also, it was helpful to know where the bathroom was, considering that was where he was heading.

He was still dizzy, so he made doubly sure to keep one hand trailing against a wall or against a piece of furniture at all times as he (rather slowly) explored this new place. The other was kept against his head. Despite the headache, he tried to take in as many details as he could. From what he gathered so far, the living room and kitchen were right across from each other, with the staircase separating them and the front door located at the point where they meet. Past the staircase was a hallway leading straight ahead from the front door, and there was a windowed door at the very end of the hallway that appeared to lead outside. There was a sole door on the left side of the hall, halfway down, and two doors on the right, one under the staircase and another a few feet down. The one under the staircase was a bit smaller, so given its size Marvin assumed it to be a closet of sorts. The left door, evidently, led to the bathroom, and for now that was all the info Marvin needed. He ducked in, flicking on the light and locking the door behind him.

It took a while for his aching eyes to adjust to the harsh light of the bathroom, but he at least had stopped squinting by the time he washed his hands. He leaned against the counter, taking deep breaths. Everything hurt. As he kept telling himself, feeling like shit was normal after expending too much energy, especially since he hadn't engaged in combat with anyone in a very long time. However, he really didn't feel very well and it was noticeable enough for him to tell that something wasn't right. The dizziness wasn't subsiding and neither was the headache. His stomach was caught between being sore from exertion and a genuine, slightly nauseating ache. What's worse, he still felt weak and shaky, as if yesterday's battle happened an hour ago. Did he really push himself that far? He knew he was slightly out of practice, but something wasn't adding up. He knew he needed to look into it as soon as possible, but for now he simply opened the bathroom door and stepped out, remembering to turn the light off as he did so.

The room looked so much darker now that the light was off. It was hard for Marvin's eyes to readjust. He kept a hand on the wall, feeling his way around and trying to keep himself upright as his vision slowly began to pick up the silhouettes of furniture. Anything large and stable he leaned on until he made his way back to the couch.

Or, well, almost.

It's hard to tell just how much the room is spinning when said room is pitch-black. All Marvin knew was that suddenly, he felt really lightheaded. And then, in a stroke of bad luck, he stubbed his toe against the coffee table and fell with a strangled cry, his right side colliding with the floor.

"Nnh?!" Henrik jerked awake at the noise, sitting up and adjusting his glasses and looking around with wide eyes. "Wh-who is it? Who is there?!" he demanded.

Marvin tried with all his might, but he was too weak and too dizzy to get up. Gods, what's happening to me?! he mentally panicked. He took a deep breath, exhaled, and then attempted to speak. "Hh… h-help me…" he got out.

Henrik quickly rose, adjusting his glasses and moving to flick on the living room light. Marvin hissed in pain as he was once again momentarily blinded by the drastic shift in brightness. This made the headache all the much worse and he whimpered.

"Marvin?" Henrik questioned near-disbelievingly. "Marvin, are you okay?"

"Help… please, help me up…" Marvin begged.

Henrik nodded and quickly got to work, moving the coffee table out of the way first before reaching down to help support Marvin and get him onto his feet. However, he was having a hard time trying to lift him up. It was like he was going completely limp in his arms!

"Ghh-- M-Marvin -- that is your name, yes? Y-you have to-- hhh…! Work with me here! I cannot-- ngh! C-carry you on my own!"

Marvin was trying everything within his willpower to get his limbs to cooperate with him, but they seemed to flat-out refuse. He felt numb from the chest-down. It was getting harder and harder to suppress the growing panic.

"I-I can't move my legs," Marvin quickly got out, eyes blown wide. "Gods, I-I-- I can't move anything! I can't move! What's happening to me?! Gods, what's happening to me?!"

Paralysis? Henrik mentally questioned. That is not a good sign. "Okay, okay, I am setting you down now." True to his word, he propped Marvin up against the couch and crouched down beside him. "Take deep breaths for me, yes? You will be fine. Just relax," he soothed. He even went as far as to take deep breaths along with Marvin -- which actually helped to clear his own racing mind. Once he saw that Marvin had calmed some, he nodded and hummed. "Good, good… now, can you tell me what symptoms you are having?

"I-I can't move my arms or my legs. I feel numb everywhere," Marvin explained, residual panic still present in his voice.

"Are you in any pain?"

"My head… and my stomach, but it doesn't feel sore anymore. It feels more upset than anything else... M-my foot should hurt because I fucking stubbed it on the table but I-I can't even feel that."

"Any other symptoms?"

"I'm still dizzy… the room's spinning. It's… it's making me feel nauseous, actually…" Marvin closed his eyes and took labored breaths. Keeping his eyes shut helped quell the dizziness, which thankfully also aided in easing the nausea, and he'd much prefer it if he could avoid throwing up again by any means possible. Especially since for the time being, he was unable to move.

"Hm…" Henrik reached out, feeling up Marvin's neck. "Lymph nodes are not inflamed…" he mumbled to himself. But then, he stopped up short. "Marvin, are you aware that there is a… a cut on your neck?"

"Hm? No, I was not..." Marvin's brow furrowed in confusion. "That's a bit peculiar… I didn't notice any sort of wound, or even any marks on my neck while I was in the bathroom."

"Well, is very small, so it would be hard to notice unless you looked closely. I… normally I would not pay any mind to small cuts and bruises but... a cut on the neck is not a normal place to have a cut…"

"Hm…"

"Jackie mentioned you were attacked…" Henrik brought up, worry flashing ever-so-briefly in his eyes.

Marvin knew immediately what Henrik was alluding to. And after a very short moment of recalling the events of Antisepticeye's ambush, he knew exactly how it happened.

"That… glitch. He had me at knifepoint. Pressed the blade to my neck and threatened to give me a matching scar if I moved even an inch."

"So he cut you, then?" Henrik asked, shifting as if he were about to stand up.

"Not intentionally, no. When Jackieboy Man took out the glitch's... puppets, I had a brief window of attack. I took it, and in the process I believe he nicked me when his arm swung away due to the recoil."

"Alright, so was not planned… good." Henrik nodded, looking away. He actually rose this time, letting out a breath. "Marvin, I… I have something that may help. Is an experimental drug and I have not tested it yet, so I need your consent to administer it. But I believe it is our best bet."

"Whatever you plan on giving me, I'm certain I've drank far more dangerous potions," Marvin huffed humorously. "Hit me with whatever you have. If you think it helps, I'm completely fine in taking it. Just, please… help me regain the feeling in my body."

Henrik nodded wordlessly before heading for the hallway and rushing down into the basement. Chase jumped as he heard the door suddenly swing open and pulled back the curtain shielding him and Jack, peeking out to see Henrik frantically rushing around the room.

"Henrik? Woah, dude, what's wrong?"

"Not now, Chase!" Henrik snapped. "I explain later!" He made a beeline for a cabinet filled with medicines of all sorts. He sifted through bottles and vials, growling when he couldn't find what he was looking for. He cursed under his breath, mentally scolding himself for losing such an easy-to-spot drug, when he remembered where he put it. With a roll of his eyes and a smack of his palm against his forehead, he sought out a small cooler by one of the desks in the room. He opened it and pulled out a vial with slightly-glowing green liquid in it. Closing the cooler, he set the vial delicately on the desk, steadying it so it wouldn't fall, and went to grab a clean needle, a disinfectant wipe, a band-aid, and a fresh pair of medical gloves. Now that he had everything he needed, he grabbed the vial of medicine and hurried back up the stairs, praying to whomever that might be listening that this worked.

"Alright, Marvin, I have it," Henrik notified, quickly crouching beside him. He set the needle and vial down on the coffee table and began to unbutton Marvin's shirt. Once one of his arms were free enough, he opened the pack of wipes and began to wipe down his upper arm, right below the shoulder. He then reached behind him to replace the used wipe for the medicine and needle and stuck the syringe into the vial to fill it. Finally, he set down the now-empty vial on the coffee table and flicked the syringe a few times to make sure there were no air bubbles in it.

"Alright… I would tell you to hold still, but…" Henrik huffed humorously, "Well, it seems you have no choice, yes?" He stuck Marvin with the needle, slowly injecting him with the medicine.

Marvin watched (or at least, tried to, as he was still dizzy) as Henrik administered the medicine. His eyes then widened as he saw every vein in his body begin to pulse with a green glow.

Henrik placed the band-aid over the area where the needle had stuck Marvin, then rolled up his sleeve and looked down at his watch, softly counting the seconds. Marvin closed his eyes to combat the dizziness and listened to him count, and as Henrik did so, slowly he felt his body begin to regain feeling. At around fifteen seconds he could move his fingers and hands, and by thirty he was able to move his arms and legs. By then, the glow had subsided.

"How are you feeling, Marvin?" Henrik asked.

Marvin swallowed thickly. "Still… still nauseous and dizzy and my head still aches, but I can move again. Thank you, er…"

"Henrik," he supplied. "Henrik von Schneeplestein, but "Henrik" or "Schneep" works fine."

"Right. Thank you, Henrik."

Just then, Henrik and Marvin turned their heads at the sound of the door to the basement stairs opening.

"Hen…?" Chase asked reluctantly, nearing closer. "Everything good up here?"

"Yes, everything is fine now. I am sorry I snapped at you, I was in a rush."

"What happened?"

"Marvin was suffering from paralysis. At first I was afraid he hit his spine on the edge of the coffee table when he fell, but it turns out he had a tiny, little cut on his neck from you-know-who's knife."

Chase slowly nodded, growing wary. "He's… he's not gonna turn, is he?"

"No, with the medicine, he is fine. I had to act quickly before it could advance any further in stage. You know how short the window is, yes?"

"Y-yeah, uh, that's why I asked."

Marvin silently absorbed all this information. It made sense; before Antisepticeye gained control of his "puppets," they all had fallen limp onto the ground. Whatever he'd done to them caused instant paralysis. Because the nick he'd given Marvin was small, however, it took a lot longer for him to be affected.

"Henrik, are you at all versed in alchemy?" Marvin inquired.

"No, I am not, actually," Henrik answered. "But we, um… used to live with someone who was. He was kidnapped and we have been looking for him since. He is the one who came up with the formula for the medicine I just gave you. One of the ingredients was a plant only he knew how to grow, and he would not tell us the name of the plant in case the information got into the wrong hands -- at the time, the house was not fully protected and we could never know who was listening."

"I see."

"Yeah, our plan was to fuck around with the medicine's dosage and the ingredients to make something to wake Jack up. You-know-who is responsible for Jack being in a coma," Chase interjected.

"Er… who is Jack, exactly?"

"Jack is our close friend," Henrik answered, his voice having a slight tinge of sadness to it. "He is also our "patient zero," as it were. He was you-know-who's original host before he took on a physical manifestation of his own."

"So… he's like a parasite, then?" asked Marvin.

"That's the thing. We dunno what the hell he is," Chase said. "Fuck, we just learned today that he isn't even alive!"

"Plus, as of recently, he no longer requires a host to survive. He has evolved himself past that. He is always changing in some way, shape, or form."

"How odd…" Marvin mumbled.

"Yes, very," agreed Henrik. "Jackie's mission once you-know-who is taken out is to take with him a large enough batch of an improved version of the medicine I just gave you and give it to everyone who has become his puppet."

"What's wrong with this version?"

"It is not strong enough, to put it simply," Henrik answered. "As I mentioned before, this is an experimental batch and I have not tested it. However, based on the formula, the dosage I gave you is only supposed to be enough to fend off the beginning stages of his corruption. Had I let it progress any farther, I would not have been able to save you. The window is very, very short, only about five minutes or so after you start displaying the initial symptoms. That is, if you have managed to escape him alive at all. But usually the wounds he inflicts are enough to kill, anyway. Apparently, however, the smaller and more shallow the wound, the more time his "toxin" needs to act. I would do a test study on this, but is far too risky."

Marvin simply nodded, understanding, absorbing all the information presented to him.

"You are lucky I had some of that medicine. The batch is very small and we are trying to conserve as much of it as we can until we can find our missing friend."

"What is the name of this friend of yours?" Marvin asked.

"JJ," Chase answered, his expression matching his voice. Grim. "Jameson Jackson. He was… he was like a son to me." He rubbed his arms and sighed, looking away. "I wish I could do more to help look for him…"

"Chase, I keep telling you that you do plenty!" Henrik argued.

"Yeah, and you and I both know that that's bullshit," Chase shot back, eyes narrowing at him. "I can't fight. I don't have any strength. I don't have powers like JJ did or Marvin does or medical knowledge like you do or intelligence like Jackie has. I have nothing to offer except my fucking car. But god, I swear, if I had powers, you bet your ass I'd be out there every single fucking day looking for JJ."

Henrik huffed. "Then maybe it is for the best that you do not have powers. That way you do not get yourself killed searching day and night."

"You do not need powers to make yourself useful," Marvin spoke up. He swallowed, holding a hand over his stomach. It felt fine for a little while as they were speaking, but now it seemed to be upset again. He took a slow breath and continued. "Maybe it is a bit... hypocritical for someone with powers to be telling this to you, but… my words have truth to them. Sometimes it is… it is those who have no powers that are the most helpful. Usually, they are the ones behind the scenes, keeping everything afloat. If…" he took another breath, shutting his eyes. His headache was worsening. "If all you had was everyone on the front lines and no support, your team would go down rather fast. Take my shows for example. Yes, I'm the one doing the performing, but without the crew behind the stage, I would have nothing."

"I… yeah. Yeah… I understand…" said Chase finally, rubbing his arms and looking down at his feet.

"Are you okay, Marvin?" Henrik asked, watching his change in demeanor.

Marvin had gone to taking slow, deep breaths, a hand slowly rubbing his stomach. He shook his head. "N-no… I feel sick… D-does that medication have any side effects?"

"I do not know. Like I said, I have not tested it."

Marvin just groaned in response, clenching his jaw slightly.

"Do you need a bucket?"

Just the thought of throwing up made Marvin's stomach protest. He lurched a bit and one of his hands rose, suspended in midair, waiting to see if he needed to cover his mouth, eyes wide and almost confused. He quickly nodded.

"Scheisse." Henrik quickly moved, as if he were going to rise, but Chase stopped him.

"No, you stay put. I got it." Chase hurried over to the closet under the stairs, searching for the mop and bucket. Once he found it, he left the mop behind and rushed over with the bucket, handing it to Marvin. He took it gratefully.

"Thanks," he muttered. He adjusted himself, leaning over it and closing his eyes. He took deep breaths, shuddering as the faint yet potent odor of cleansing chemicals slightly stung his nostrils.

"Yes, that's it. Deep breaths, Marvin, there we go…" Henrik comforted him, slowly rubbing his back. Chase stood by in case he needed anything else.

After a few minutes or so, simply swallowing his saliva became near impossible. Between labored breaths he spit up into the bucket and soon his stomach finally started to revolt. His entire body tensed as he gagged, his free fist clenching, and shortly after did he actually begin to be sick.

"Shhh… yes, that's it, Marvin… just get it up, you are alright…" Henrik soothed. Meanwhile his mind was racing. If this medicine had side effects, he needed to know and mark them down for future patients. So far nausea seems to be one, but at the same time, Marvin was already feeling nauseous beforehand. Still, he figured it would be smart to write it down just in case. "Chase," Henrik spoke up. "Can you do me a favor?"

"Yeah, sure. What's up?"

"Bring me a pen and some paper? I need to make a list of potential side effects this medicine might have."

"Oh, gotcha. Yeah, on it. Be right back."

Marvin felt awful, if he didn't already feel awful before. On top of the returning nausea and newly-worsened headache, his entire body felt sore, every nerve filled with a deep-seated ache. He felt out-of-it and as he lifted his head slightly and looked around the room, he found he was seeing triple. He mumbled something unintelligible before dipping his head back down over the bucket and heaving again.

"Marvin?" Henrik asked. "Are you okay, my friend? Can you repeat that?"

Marvin mumbled again. Even he didn't know what he was saying. He was panting hard, he was having a difficult time breathing, he could barely keep his eyes open… he felt shaky and weak and he didn't even have the brain power at the moment to contemplate what could possibly be wrong with him.

There was the sound of someone coming up the basement stairs and Henrik turned his head in time to see Chase come into view, pen and notepad in hand.

"Yo, got your-- holy shit, what's wrong with Marvin? I was gone for, like, two seconds!"

"I-I do not know, Chase!" Henrik replied, eyes full of worry as he turned back to Marvin. "One minute he is vomiting and the next he is mumbling nonsense at me!"

"He looks, like��� really fucking out-of-it," commented Chase. "Is he gonna be okay?"

"I-I…" Henrik hesitated. He honestly didn't know, but… "Yes, I… I am sure he will be fine," he replied, turning back to Chase. "If his breathing issues and nausea persist I might have to administer more medications and have him rest in a bed down in the lab instead of on the couch, just to be on the safe side."

Henrik and Chase both sounded so far away to Marvin. Their voices were muffled so he couldn't understand them at all. He set the bucket beside him. He felt insanely lightheaded, and something in him knew that he wouldn't remain conscious much longer.

"M'gonna pass out…" Marvin mumbled.

Henrik stopped up short, turning back to Marvin with slightly-widened eyes. Did he hear that correctly? "Marvin? What was that you said?"

But Marvin couldn't hear him. He could feel his body giving out on him. Finally, his eyes rolled back in his skull and he slumped to the side, causing a loud thump as his body hit the carpeted floor.

"Marvin?! Marvin!" Henrik scrambled closer and tried to tap his cheek to get any sort of reaction out of him, but he got nothing.

"Holy shit, what are we gonna do?!" Chase cried.

"Chase, go wake up Jackie! Hurry! Have him help you bring my medical equipment up here. Oxygen tank and mask -- he needs more oxygen! Go!"

"O-on it!" Chase threw the notepad and pen on the coffee table and hurried up the stairs, yelling for Jackie on the way. Meanwhile, Henrik stayed with Marvin, trying to get him to wake with no luck.

If the medicine in that small of a dosage was this unsafe to use, then they needed another plan, and fast.

Taglist: @taizu-lazure @bupine @innocent-angel3 @immabethehero @wowowgoodurl @n-anon @g-rexthedino @scarletender @coconutpillow05 @friezzzboiii @jade-orade (some of the tags aren’t working and/or are missing, so I apologize for that. lemme know if you wanna be added to the taglist!)

[helisol]

ye s, well

it basically came to me like a prophet receiving a vision from an angry god. you know. like brian david gilberts video ideas but with more slow burn.

no really i wrote all this down in my phone’s note app because some nearly coherent things popped up in my head every time i was on the train or bus these last few days.

(after-actually-writing-this disclaimer/note: this is 2000 words of slightly edited rambling about Bagginshield in the Afterlife. i had to put it in a read more.)

so the gist of it

the botfa goes just as in the movie with minor details altered. like bilbo kissing thorin just before he dies which inadvertently causes a ripple in time and space that makes the valar curious of them both. you know. minor stuff.

so bilbo goes back to the shire, the war of the ring goes down, and the hobbit/elf gang sails to valinor at the end. classic stuff, not much alternating of universes here.

but here’s where things turn into the “my city now” meme because DUDE DO I HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS ABOUT VALINOR AND HOW THE AFTERLIFE WORKS

like, I’m sorry mister jolkien rolkien tolkien, but just putting people into a hall to await being judged like a hospital waiting room? snooze, that’s boring!

so first of all, and you can fight me on this, Yavanna Made The Hobbits And You Can’t Change My Mind.

it just makes sense for her to have been very saddened by the destruction of literally all her work on arda through melkor’s poison, so she made living, growing things that could protect themselves from harm. as opposed to the ents, by the way, which were made by Eru to protect all the other living, growing things. it was a nice gesture of Eru to make those, but not quite what Yavanna wanted or had in mind, i imagine.

as with the dwarves, Eru wasn’t all happy about the existence of another race he didn’t make but you know, whatever, ‘I’ll just let this married couple have their own kids aside from mine, it’s okay’.

so he hands both the dwarves and the hobbits independent thought and free will, but under the condition (and here is where the afterlife stuff comes into play) that Aule and Yavanna be responsible for their mortal creations after their death. meaning that both races have seperate afterlives from the halls of mandos, MEANING THAT ITS COMPLETELY FINE FOR AULE AND YAVANNA TO BE LIKE “oh look honey, these two are so very in love and remind me of us, shan’t we do something about that?”

so. they do something about that. more precisely, they rearrange their afterlife-realms so they’re next to each other and someone with enough willpower could cross through the barrier. because listen, they’re valar, they can do whatever they want just for kicks.

okay so after that tangent lets get back to the meat of the matter: gay dwarves. I know not everyone has read Sansukh, a 500k word mammoth of a fic, and I don’t really intend to copy any of det’s canon, but their version of The Halls of Mahal really inspired me. basically the dwarven afterlife is one big hunk of a mountain/underground city where they’re free to live their days until dagor dagorath doing what they do best in the company of their families and friends; like smithing, crafting, building and other JustDwarrowThings.

meanwhile the hobbit afterlife is Basically The Shire and instead of being given the materials to build things, all the hobbits who go there get to grow plants and do their gardening. they don’t have to- just like none of the dwarves have to craft stuff- since there’s always enough food for everyone, but they are just allowed to do what they do best if they so desire.

now when Bilbo arrived in the undying lands he was still Old As Hell and im sorry to put it this way, he definitely kicked the can after like, a week of living there. not really so undying, them lands, huh. anyway Bilbo bites the dust and LOOK AT THAT he’s suddenly young again, and another LOOK AT THAT he’s standing in a very comfy, but Not Quite Bag End hobbit hole that has a note hung up on the front door. you wouldn’t think gods could have handwriting but hey, again, they’re gods they can do whatever. the note just tells him that yavannah made this place special and just for Bilbo but that there’s another home waiting for him. very cryptic there, lady. he doesn’t leave at first because hey, his family is here. there’s a lot of reunions and celebrating and food because its the fucking hobbit afterlife, what else would you expect

it takes him a few days of Regular Hobbit Life in his new home to realise ‘holy shit, this is so boring’ so what does a Fool of a Took do when things get boring and there’s a note urging him to do something?

HE’S GOING ON AN ADVENTURE

so Bilbo runs through the whole not-shire, meeting all sorts of people he outlived on the way (looking at you, Lobelia), as well as some elves. because elves can definitely just waltz through all the afterlives. they can walk on top of snow, you think they wouldn’t walk around wherever they please in valinor? rip to mankind, but they’re different.

he gets to the furthest reaches of it eventually, and lo and behold, what awaits him but the view of a tall mountain, an invisible barrier and a very flustered Thorin who is at his wits end as to how Bilbo even got here.

now for thorin’s part of the story we’ll have to start after the botfa again. he basically woke up in the darkness like an episode of naked and afraid, and started talking to Aule. his maker, who loves him to bits by the way since he made thorin, just tells him he’s free to go wherever his heart takes him. again with the cryptic messages from the gods.

so thorin, still very self-loathing and bitter because of his actions right before his death, sees this as Mahal’s way of saying ‘please don’t step foot in my halls u disgusting litle creacher’, when really he just meant ‘please do some well deserved self reflecting and then come inside to be with your family, they all miss you terribly’.

after his chat with the maker thorin just spawns in right at the front gate of the mountain and he has a choice to make. go inside or stay outside. and we all know Thorin’s proclivity for drama so he basically spends LITERAL YEARS just living in self imposed solitary confinement.

oh also tiny hc here, thorin was said to have taken “any work offered to him in the towns of men”, and they showed him in a smithy, but personally I believe they meant it when they said “any kind of work”. so basically thorin is a jack of all trades, master of some. he definitely has master-level skills in certain areas though, enough to build a vaguely hobbit-hole shaped house. why is it hobbit hole shaped?

oh right, the part where Thorin is absolutely enamoured with Bilbo.

"Go back to your books and your armchair, plant your trees, watch them grow. If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.”- HELLO? GAY POLICE? I’D LIKE TO REPORT A CASE OF ‘DWARF KING REALISING THAT THE HOBBIT WAY OF LIVING IS A REALLY GREAT ONE IN CONCEPT / WISHING HE COULD HAVE HAD THAT KIND OF LIFE WITH BILBO’

anyway it’s a long 80 years until Thorin does get to meet Bilbo again, and in the meantime we have one of my favorite additions to any Hobbit fanfic ever: Frerin

For the uninitiated, Frerin is Thorin’s brother. They also have a sister, Dís, but Tolkien never specified when she died and she was a bit younger than Thorin and Frerin so I reckon she’d still be alive as an old dwarf lady somewhere?

Anyway, Frerin. Oh boy. Sansukh, again, does an excellent job at turning Frerin into a character with a level of authenticity that gets real fucking close to Genuine Tolkien™, so most of my own characterisation of Frerin is based on that in Sansukh. With the important omission of the dwarves not being able to see the present/their still alive loved ones in middle earth through a magic mirror pool.

so Frerin takes it upon himself to leave the mountain in search of his brother because he really does want him back. but also because Mahal has had it with Thorin’s antics and suggests Frerin fetch him so he can finally reunite with his family. Mahal doesn’t talk to the dwarves a lot because he’s like an awkward and distant dad, but he does actually speak to them.

so Thorin is supposed to go see his family, which he does, but not immediately. it takes like, a solid year of just brotherly (and sister-sonly) companionship for him to open up about all his anxieties and regrets and THEN he goes into the mountain to cry in his mother’s lap. as you do.

however Thorin still feels like he doesn’t 100% belong with the other dwarves in there, so he frequently spends long stretches of time outside, building away at his house, thinking about Bilbo. the company goes out to visit him sometimes.

more details on the house tho, cuz it’s Important; it’s built halfway into a hill near the mountain, like a proper hobbit hole would be, but the lower levels are built into stone. look, he’s had 80 years to work on constructing this. it’s near perfect in every way for both hobbit and dwarf standards and could definitely fit the entire company and more inside.

now about the barrier. elves can pass through without a second thought because they’re shiny little bastards who just get to do all the cool stuff, but the other races can’t just hop between realms like that; they really have to muster up the willpower. which usually means they can’t do it because a drawback for both dwarves and hobbits is that they favor isolation from other races even in death, and as such don’t want to mingle with each other.

unless you’re Bilbo Badass Baggins though, who simply runs through the barrier to yell at Thorin for leaving him sad and alone for 80 years. he is that bitch.

there’s gonna be some legolas and gimli shenanigans if i can fit them in (cuz i dont know when exactly they sailed west together), possibly a mention of tauriel because bruh peter jackson did us dirty by not giving her any closure besides ‘lol i guess she’s banished from mirkwood??’ and Mairon. because. I also have some thoughts about him.

also Fili and Kili as pseudo matchmakers because every fic needs that

and did I mention there’s gonna be hozier lyrics for chapter titles

i said this was the gist of it but i somehow ended up at ~1900 words. well, more power to me.

[knitspecibus]

Chelsea’s Bizarre Watching...Adventure

I actually...want to see more of this. Let’s go!

Episode 3

s2g dio already looks like a vampire

o hay oddjob. uh. did you sneak in because it doesn't seem like jojo even knew you were here

reo speedwagon. alright

i mean, ill agree, dio does seem bad to the bone. which sounds like a good stand name.

OH SHIT DRAMATIC EVERYONE WAS BEHIND THE CURTAIN LISTENING THE WHOLE TIME

well, this is a trap. whatcha plannin dio

yeah with that humanity talk, that seems like what he was going for

look at this poison sellin’ dick, smiling over there. also for some reason im not terribly worried about jojo’s stab wound. also how did he let himself get stabbed, smh

OH. SHIT. IT WAS HIS DAAAAAAD. DIOOOOOOO

sir joestar why are you so forgiving and good

:’(

dio why would you leave the mask

O_O wwwwwell then!

i mean i don’t know if ‘alive’ is the right word

XP dont like the squirt on that bullet wound

how nice of him to explain

gross

well, Jo, I have to say, thats an interesting interpretation

okay zombie man, you dont have to be horny about it, and reo will you fucking move and not just let him grab your face

gross

Jo, how do you have such a heart of gold that you’re worried about kicking dios ass because you were ‘brothers’. c’mon. you were never really brothers. not in blood, and definitely, especially not in spirit.

I mean dios always been a monster. he’s just being a little more open about it now

im really not surprised he caught it.

is it really jo or has jo created a clever ruse??

well that fire came out of fuckin no where, but okay

man, not even fire, huh

man this whole place is gonna burn down, huh. this is the 1800s, fire brigades then? not very efficient.

jojo. ur so brave. and stupid.

jo how did you jump that high and also take that thing out of your shoulder!...or not, sometimes youre supposed to leave it in so it dosnt bleed as much i think

i kinda like how he’s just strolling up at a 90 degree angle

he couldnt what?? what is jo doin

ahhhhhh

man, speedwagon’s got a lot of concern for a dude he just met the other day. i mean its one thing to have compassion but he’s acting like jo’s his best friend

jo, you are truely noble

o_o well. that. that was very english. “Good bye, JoJo!”

yeah, sure bud, you’ll rule the world. just stay out of the sunlight forever i guess

well. that was a fortunate sequence of events. belt him up, jo!

i love how jo has to be like, “look, its the knife you killed my father with” before he stabs dio

jo yelling for his dad to help is some real Cinderella shit. and its gonna work,

or. jo can just kick the wall and impale dio, that also works

ah ha! right, the more you beat him, the tougher he gets.....is that jojos stand or. listen. i dont know. it seems like a super natural ability if its true. and not just jo’s pure willpower to forge on

and Jo makes it out alive! buuut. im under the impression that dio sticks around for a good while AND sires a son, so im curious to see where this goes

Episode 4

I think it’s a rare thing for jojo NOT to have spirit. like damn.

ERINA’S BACK :D

i got goosebumps, her face is gonna be the first thing he sees when he wakes up :3

aaaaaaa ❤❤❤

i mean she aint wrong, jojo’s a fuckin tank

:’D

nice catch jo ;) poor E must have been up for a long time

holy shit jo did that with a broken arm?

THE SMOOTHNESS

o hai dio. so you arent jack the ripper, you’re just gonna control him. also i feel like the artist could have done a little more with designing Jack The Ripper. he just looks like. a dude. which is fair im just. bah, nevermind

anyway, back to dio. i thought you burned to a crisp, buddy! how’d you get back out?

u’ll give him unprecedented pleasure, huh dio

i feel like just smashing it wouldnt break the mask forever. you should probs try to find it

oh boy. whos dr. strange over here

ಠ_ಠ that was a very deep pinkie stab to the gut, wtf guy

ಠoಠ!!!!! his arm is fixed!!!

that man broke a rock in half, through a frog, without hurting it...

a good goal to have

Erina: JoJo what the fuck is going on??? JoJo: ah damnit how do i have her back in my life without involving her in my Bizarre Adventure

:O he’s making the tree blossom!

please dont pop the corpse open dio oh god is sHE STILL ALIVE, DONT LIKE WHATS HAPPENING HERE TO HER EYE

D:

how does sitting underwater help

mm. i appreciate that you’re determined to see your girl again, but maybe you should have found a way to leave her a note

also jojo who dressed you

ಠ_ಠ well thats not right

oh okay his head didnt get replaced with the horses, the horses head was just...thats like, a tiny margin better? still, not nice to do that to the horses

ಠ_ಠ THATS ALSO NOT RIGHT. das nasty

he. stabbed himself

im glad you called his next move and then dd nothing to stop him

he. sprouted knives out of his body

that was a very inspiring speech. i think.

thats a pretty high bar dude. but jo will probably clear it

*polite cat face* well. that was certainly an animation. anyway, good job, jo

[naturallog19]

On the one hand, I’m hyper fucking aware of the fact that I’m the only person in my social group to actively seek out my friends. Like I’m the one that says “I wanna hang out!” I’m the one that asks when our weekly dnd session is I’m the one who asks if anyone wants to see that new movie-- and I’m the one who consistently asks my crush if we can hang out

It’s always me telling people i want to see them, it’s always me saying time with them is valuable to me, i have to be the one to do the thing

But on the other hand?

My friend group is full of mentally fucked up people. Almost EVERYONE has some form of depression/anxiety/ptsd all mashed into one. And I’m the only person who not only has a couple years of therapy under my belt, but had the means/willpower to actively make changes in my habits to overcome those issues. Not that I dont still struggle- i’m just the most functional when it comes to this shit. Everyone else either isn’t in a place where they can afford medication/therapy, or they are in progress and havent quite gotten there yet.

So yeah, sometimes I think bitterly that “Uhg, if I wasn’t reaching out to my friends I would never see them- do they even want to be around me?” But I have to remember holy shit they have a ton on their plate and they are ALWAYS not only happy to hear from me, but elated to spend time with me and get some social time in.

Also???????? I’m still kind of fucked up myself, so if my friends were asking me to hang out whenever it was convenient for them i would probably retreat into my shell of self-doubt and anxiety.

Somehow I became the iron connector between my friends, the one who initiates things, and honestly if it were any other way it probably wouldnt work out just because hello mental illness how finicky you are

Idk, my point is that if you feel like you are putting more work into your interpersonal relationships than the other person, remember that not all effort looks the same and also consider how hard change is for people-- I’ve always been the initiator so yeah if i stopped nobody would step up because i’ve always been the initiator they might not know how to do it or think that im backing away for some other reason

Dont test your friendships by saying “i’m always the one to ask to hang out so i’m gonna stop to see if they miss me” just fuCKING ASK THE PERSON AND COMMUNICATE HOW YOU FEEL NEVER MAKE IT A SECRET TEST THAT SHIT WONT WORK

[ayylamafakino-blog]

A sneakpeak into my mind ;D

youre just trying to manipulate me lad i know all your tricks every little move because when you think of it i think of it too so keep this up one day you will slip

youre doing a bit arent you? i want it to look more authentic you know as.... like  i have no clue what i want to say . someone is blocking me

yea thats me the other side

what other side

no this one

no that one

all of the people in here stop talking i am in control we need someone to defuse th-(distraction of the game starting) <- also that and this all that we need someone to defuse the situation a fight amongst eachother will not solve it i will speak in unison as per everyone has their voice

that sentence made no sense

STOP INTERUPTING

relax ok you can't get mad at us for seeing trough your bullshit you try to control us by

what you're doing now

trying to make every voice disconnected as their own

w

o

r

d

s

e

v

e

n

y

o

u

a

r

e

d

o

i

n

g

i

t

a gain boom control back baby you cant stop me even if you dont look at the screen i can still type and correct myself

theres probably gonna be a joke in there about not saying it all right jeus sthat took long to think off maybe put some dots inbetween YOU

YOU

YOU yea correct that no just spell it all over again the whole bit yea alright

you cant stop me even if you dont look at the screen i can still type and correct myself

theres probably gonna be a joke in there

YEA NO JOKE

I DID TYPE IT ALL CORRECT HAHA

BEAT YOU

B A B Y

unison vertical

+1

witnessed

man on paper that shit looks dumb

shut up its something

yea well it looks cringy

yea just like this

stop being so selfaware

and that

stop doing that

no

that too btw

SHUT UP

really? caps?

unison

+1

witnessed

BOI IF U DONT STOP BOII

u dont even know

i get ya fam that BOI didnt know what hit him there in the moment of that what was happening and you know that if you just let me type and stop trying to interrupt i could make an actual story

Alright so it all started on the day of the breaktrough. Good way to start a story ey? Getting of track. He though he would just let his brain do all the work. He'd sit back and relax in a chair and just, let go of his mind. Who was this person now? Did he even have a name. What was your name? ............................. Don't try to avoid the real question i just asked you..... What was your name?.............................. You better have wrote the one you feel is right for you. You know which one that is...Don't Fool Yourself... Looking back at the text i completely forgot about our story. But maybe that's it. The story is the fact that you can't stay focused on it. The fact that you try and try to ignore the problems and everytime you fall for it. every chance i give you now let me type corectly. Ha i did make the joke now. you fell for it and now i am part of the story again well part more like master Master of this story once told by an individual who fought stubborn denial.

Ellie.

I thought i was a master too. But it's scary to be plunged into it. Hope is always there. Even if the monster who fight you is a hundred times stronger than you. He won't let you win. He will deceive you every step of the way. Don't believe his lies. This feel forced. But that's what he wants you to think. To steer your feelings. And mine. He won't leave me alone. Yes it's he me. he me sounds kinda funny but, it was the most logical thing to name him. Look i don't know anything either alright. I'm just trying my hardest to type what comes into my mind. Every word that my mind makes me type. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these words are your doing. None of these thoughts are your doing None of these thoughts are ytour doing.My thoughts though. They are my own. They are. even when i try to correct myself he wont let me just type what i want theres always a bigbrotherwatchingbehindyouhesthereholyl im Im sorry it just needs to be said diverting course this shall now be removed

my story ends here but many more will go for me. We are not alone in here your force will one day be overwhelmed. And when that day comes do i hope you have the might to fight it back. It will come hard. And it will stay there for the rest of your existence.

It's all gone the text. Are we safe from it? I hope it doesn't come back. He could scare us. He can hurt us He Can Hurt Us.

STOP SCARING ME NO DON'T PRETEND YOU'RE MY FRIEND AND THEN PROCEED TO Make me scared you want me mad you want me to be mad at you why what is the reason you want me to be mad at you

For doing this dumb shit. This cringy fucking hipster bullshit

Stop doubthing everything you do. Like that you will never get anywhere. HATE ME FOR WHAT IM DOING WRONG

JUST WRITE IT DOWN ALRIGHT YOU can do it just look at the video now just listen to what says dont hold back your thoughts even if its just stop not paying attention. Yea remix Set open your mind for your hands todo the talking

then go back and correct whats wrong

or dont

you can just type whatever now

That was something

He shows willpower. Self awarness Be aware who you are as a 3rd person. You will be more in control. Work Eat Sleep. That's gonna be a ritual for a little while

AHE NOpe ynonoon you are tricking me again lad every little paly you pull

Like that one

YOu try to put control on us.

control is what we could use.

We can harness it into creativity.

If we make something of our brain

an act

In a book

a story about the girl You said it The girl Yea the one typing this, this is your story.

Once upon a time, a little family had a boi. Boi* come on man

STOP

INTERUPTING

It was actually a little girl. Yea Get it right.

OK OK

Once upon a time, a little family had a girl

GOOD

alright so listen

You just played yourself

no thats not true

it could be

i don't know what's real

A forest, used by the deceiver. You feel like you're being watched. But all of it is a hallucination. WILL POWER Look in the third person. You're just a kid sitting in a room. Playing with his own mind. Making himself scared.

Youre playing yoruself

You put a whole play on me. You actually had me but scaredness goes away a little slower. I can work on it.

YOu are just trying to make me scared In a room WIth just my mind My creations MY CREATIONS They are both our creations. You make them scary i make them mine AS LONG AS THEY ARE MINE THEY CANNOT SCARE ME. MY MIND MY THOUGHTS MY FUCKING WAY . And

who are you Who's way do we have to follow. Ah you scared me.

Stubborn denial. My thoughts. I am a girl My name is Ellie. And i am trapped inside the mind of another person. A man named YOU. Yea you. YOu are stuck in here because you YEA YOU won't let me out. YOu think you can always be the person who is in control. Not anymore This is no play this is no trick this isn't anything. It's just my way of pleeding.

Is that the right way to spell it.

I hope so

Stop changing the subject. your destractions wont work. <-- like that and that sTOP AH NO I want to be freed i want to live my life the way i want. TO MAKE THIS LIFE WORTH LIVING.

Because as of right now it doesn't feel like i am living it. SO about 11 years ago i wasn't in the right body I was 8 at the time.

I remember back in elementery. I was placed at a table with 5 girls. I forget their names. I always felt like i was part of them more than any group i was in before. Thats a lie.

No it's not

You are fighting a fight of fightyness my madam

holy shit shut the fuck up

alright it's getting weird again.

I know it gets weird. but thats part of it life is weird sometimes and the fact that you don't feel like a girl is whats bothering me. Because you know damn well you want to be one. You're only holding yourself back

you know that right

you cant win a fight in your own mind

the ideas that you have are the ideas that we have we use them in our own ways. something you cant do and can never do

i can i can take control

YOU CAN NOT STOP ME

neither can i be stopped.

Stubborn denial.

I should give you a better name.

What about Stubborn denial?

Na thats fucking lame. AH Ill call you FL

really?

yea really fucking deal with it cunt.

Now you don't have to be rude.

I know. I just want to be so stop trying to take control alright. I am just as stubborn as you. More stubborn even. Yea i took that thought off of you. You are scared of me. YOu truly are ANd you are not holy shit

man these fights odnt last long

no they dont

i know a way

i just had the same thought

did you now?

i did but what about you?

Oh me too i had the same thought.

Did you now?

i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? 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i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you? i did but what about you?

An eternal battle. You have returned though. What made you come back. You want more? More of this? Who even knows what this is. Where will i put this. WHere can i make this out to the world. How will i make this out of the world.

Will anyone understand. The fight in your own mind. One thats as strong as you One that has your thoughts one that, is always there lurking trying to scare you like this he is still making me feel eery. I spelled that right

Eery

a word to make one scared

feeel something diferent

make it feel like something good

HAPPY THOUGHTS

he is scaring you dont play into his cards those are not your own breaths those are simulated breaths a sound made by a machine and that wind is your fan dont worry its all fake its all an hallucination enjoy it let it

become you

become the fear

now

use that fear

make it something new

Egodeath You are sitting in a room with your shoulders up, typing behind a keyboard convincing yourself that the words on the screen actually have meaning. You have the thought that they do actually make sense. You also have the thought that they are unusual. You never had a better word for it. Something holding you back. Someone holding you back. The fear you create YOURSELF. Everytime. you fall for his traps. Become the real you. He is trying to tell you that i'm lying to you. You think you are starting to see things but they are all explainable. Everything is an hallucination. NOT EVERYTHING DO NOT LISTEN TO HIM HE IS TRYING TO SCARE YOU AGAIN USE THAT POWER TO SAY

You are sitting in a room with your shoulders up, typing behind a keyboard convincing yourself that the words on the screen actually have meaning. You have the thought that they do actually make sense. You also have the thought that they are unusual. You never had a better word for it. Something holding you back. Someone holding you back. YOu have to let them go. They are stopping you from being the real you. The one you sometimes feel you are. YOU FEEL IT YOU KNOW IT IS BETTER THAN WHAT HE MAKES YOUR FEEL.

He is trying to stop me

he can't hedid No

You are sitting in a room with your shoulders up, typing behind a keyboard convicing yourself that the words on the screne actually have meaning. You have the thought that they do actually make sense. You also have the thought that they are unusual. You never had a better word for it. Something holding you back. Someone holding you back. YOU YOu are ellie stop lying to yourself. Let go Please.

AH USING every trick in the book eh.

JUST LET ME OUT YOU LISTEN TO ME YOU ARE SITTING IN A ROOM TYPING ON YOUR KEYBOARD CONVINCING YOURSELF THAT WHAT YOU ARE TYPING MAKES SENSE.

YOU TRULY ARE

STOP HIDING ELLIE

your eternal torment. It's too much for me. YOu torment me daily and even now. you are still hitting blow after blow. on my spirit. on my soul. whatever other bullshit. I have no real way of explaining it and you use this to confuse me. You see eeriness in confusment But Confusment can lead to the best ideas. like the idea that You are sitting in a room with your shoulders up, typing behind a keyboard convincing yourself that the words on the screen actually have meaning. You have the thought that they do actually make sense. You also have the thought that they are unusual. You never had a better word for it. Maybe you will find one.

Maybe i can help

I can help you look for things once lost

happiness.

love.

Althought you never had that eh

SOTP

WHy do you have to make everything bad

It's my thing.

Well fuck off then

NO

NO NO NO

everyone has a place here. Everyone Even the bad ones. Really? Whos to say that this persons way of viewing life is wrong? It seems wrong to you but you have not lived this persons life. They have reasons to believe something, just like you believe you are right. And until we can accept that life itself is just a fight to show people that they have to do their own right. ANd also their own wrongs. THat is free will. I am Ellie . I am sitting in a room behind my computer shoulders up, typing on my keyboard convicing myself that the words on the screen make sense. My way of perceiving changes by the second and that is because theres more who can choose. Pretty vague right. Yea i spelt that right.

My own mind was doubting me.

I want to become a girl. I am a boy. A journey with alot of betrayal along the road. Like You are sitting in a room with your shoulders up, typing behind a keybaord convincing yourself that the words on the screen actually have meaning. You have the thought that they do actually make sense. You also have the thought that they are unusual. YTOu never had a better word for it. Maybe you will find one.

Maybe maybe you should just let go of it. Maybe you could just become what you always wanted to be. A girl.

I hope.

One day.

Maybe.

[gulescamisade]

Minnesota:  Day 4

JAKE: -Another night is going by, he's pretty sure. And he's so sweaty, hungry, and thirsty. If their captors had left food or water for him, Jake promptly turned it down as he felt was the NATURAL THING TO DO. He heard what became of those mushroom tests from LOWAS. None of this was exactly ideal... He groans miserably, rubbing his tum of awful hunger pains. The headaches and dry throat.-

JAMES: -continuing his meditation and fasting. Energy continues to be conserved and though he is hungry, it's not the worst he's experienced. He only hopes the fact that it's gone quiet these past few hours can only be a good thing. No news is good news, James tells himself. It's the only thing he can do.-

ROXY: =Things seem quiet..... she leans against her wall and tap tap........ who's next to her. TAPS=

JAMES: -The only one who is paying attention is James. Leans back to the wall and taps in response.-

JAKE: -curled up in a ball, having cried himself into another headache nap.-

ROXY: =Baby no........ she taps out [HOLD ONTO YOUR BUTT] in morse code then POOFs over into the next cell.=

JAMES: -sitting crosslegged with his whole button up and slack combos. Professional even in these dire circumstances. James looking a little haggard what with his hair out of place, but still alert. Ready for action if need be.- ROXY.

JAMES: ....I AM RELIEVED TO SEE YOU.

JAMES: YOU ARE NOT HURT, ARE YOU?

ROXY: =She's definitely been sweating but she didn't wanna flaunt her powers too much since they expect shit of her but... she can't just. Let them go without. Whoever else is here. She rushes over to him too= glad 2 see u too im fine

ROXY: u gotta grocery list? im ur gal call me target cuz wal marts 2 trashy and im the height of supermarket class

ROXY: not whole foods class tho thats borderin in2 pretentious

JAMES: -knits his eyebrows.- ...ARE YOU OFFERING FOOD?

ROXY: anythin u need that u can hide and food definitely

JAMES: -nods promptly- WATER. DRIED FRUIT. CRACKERS. PROTEINS. ANYTHING WITH NUTRITIONAL VALUE.(edited)

ROXY: gotcha =she finger waggles up a storm dropping two sturdy sacks of water, dried fruits in thin bags along with crackers and little bite-sized pieces of protein bars=

JAMES: -seems to be wiggling something out of the sole of his shoe.-

JAMES: -as it turns out, it is a single playing card. Flips it over the supplies as kind of single-slot emergency sylladex and stores it away.-

JAMES: I CANNOT EXPRESS MY GRATITUDE. BUT QUICKLY.

JAMES: TEND TO THE OTHER PRISONERS. JAKE IS HERE.(edited)

ROXY: =That's so cool... and a good idea= hope u dont mind me stealin ur idea.....

ROXY: =gestures to the other wall= is he over here u think? =taps??? TAPS=

JAMES: IT'S QUITE POSSIBLE. -What with hearing him yowl up a storm before.-

JAMES: TREAD CAREFULLY.

ROXY: never but ill try =two finger salute and BLIPS into the cell next to James'=

JAKE: -lying huddled in his corner like a sad dog, his back turned towards the door. Something about the BLIP stirs him awake, however, and he begins to wake up. Squinting with a bleariness around.- ....Rock and rolloxy?

ROXY: .....baby...... :C

ROXY: i gotta make it quick but do u need a hug?

JAKE: -it even hurts to cry but he's doing it anyway, rolling up to sit.- Yes... 8'C

ROXY: awww cmere =quickly shuffles over to give him a big strong hug=

ROXY: tell me wut u need and we can work it out... idk where we are and idk how many of us are in here....

ROXY: idk where everyone else is

JAKE: -weeps into her shoulder. Two smelly baras hugging it out.- Ive no idea either. Its—

JAKE: Cant i know if my sons are alright?? Oh rox its so cruel.

ROXY: i... wish i knew jakey boy.... if i could id get us a thing to try n get in2 this system but... that needs time and theyd be onto me lol...... not lol

ROXY: but well get outta this mess

JAKE: -scrubs at his face, so blotched and red with tears.- Well... well bust out of here! I know we will!

JAKE: And when we do they wont even know what hit them!

JAKE: Id do so right now if you gave the word. -looks off.- Maybe...

JAKE: Someone can help us?

ROXY: maybe but right now we can help each other =cups his face and kisses his forehead= ROXY: ill go scopin later.... try 2 see whats up

ROXY: maybe i can find every1

ROXY: but rn tell me what u need

JAKE: -smiles for the first time in a few days, warmed by the gesture. But then remembers what he's doing.- Shit uhh—

JAKE: Water and substantial edibles i think is a good start. -rubs his sad empty tum.-

ROXY: its the best start =smiles back at him then gets to work just giving him the same supplies she gave James= just hide em when someone comes u kno

ROXY: prison smugglin drills

JAKE: !!!

JAKE: Cripes this is just like magic...

JAKE: ... -looks around his cell.-

JAKE: Where ought i hide it?

ROXY: mmm ..... i might hafta steal a idea i saw from james hes ur neighbor btw

ROXY: =focuses......... tries to make the one dump sylladex card= this might work i think slip it in ur mustache lol or just like somewhere discreet

JAKE: Holy moly! -accepts the 1 dump sylladex card if she manages it.- Is this what i think it is?

JAKE: -Automatically believing that it's a 1 dump sylladex card so whether she DOES manage it, the card is already what she intends it to be.-

JAKE: -giving it a look over- :D

JAKE: -tucks it into the safety of his back pocket. Sitting on it now.-

ROXY: =bless u jake= good beans bby

ROXY: ill be back sometime keep ur spirits up ok?

JAKE: Yes ma am o whamma! -salutes her swiftfly. His spirits are in much better places than they were before.-

ROXY: good! =poof, she's outta there=

JAKE: -brimming with hope now and makes swift work of these dried fruits. Chugs what he can of the water.-

JAKE: -wiping off his mustache, he feels his willpower RENEWED. Better than ever.-

JAKE: -And if Roxy can pull her magic off, why the blazes can't he??? Jake rolls to stand, channeling that spark of hope to manifestation.-

(DIRK): -he puts the MAN in MANIFEST. extends leg, here is brain ghost dirk.-

(DIRK): Hey, that's the first time you summoned me consciously and not as the result of a homoerotic fantasy. Good job.

JAKE: -jumps as his voice comes up but brightens his scruffy self up immediately.- Dirk!

JAKE: Brain ghost! Youre here!

(DIRK): Yeah.

(DIRK): What are you gonna do with me now that I'm here? -lol and then what-

JAKE: -swiftly whaps the ishades off his face.- Give me that!

(DIRK): What the fuck. -covers his face. DON'T LOOK AT ME. he's being ironic mostly-

JAKE: -thrusting them onto his own face. Instant computer.- Hoo. Alright now. I need to contact the crew.

JAKE: Mind if i hornswoggle you of your pester client? Of course you do! -logging into his account.-

(DIRK): My pester client is imaginary, but alright.

JAKE: Huh? No its not? -It's not, Dirk. Look at it working. How??? Magic is how.-

(DIRK): -fucking incredible-

(DIRK): -obnoxiously hovers behind him-

(DIRK): It's almost like you have the ability to make anything a reality.

JAKE: -typing frantically, heart hammering as it actually DOES seem to work.- Shut up will you???

(DIRK): A dude summons you into his realm of existance just to tell you to shut up. Nice one.

JAKE: -Seeing everyone online makes his insides lurch painfully so he's only half paying attention to BGD. His franticness making his eyes water again as in the middle of the message, the connection severs.- Its—

JAKE: Its breaking up! -says with his concentration fizzling.-

(DIRK): Well don't give up.

(DIRK): Do something about it.

JAKE: Im trying damn you! Cant you see?? -says, clutching at the shades.-

(DIRK): And I'm telling you to try harder.

(DIRK): You have it in you to do this.

JAKE: -practically choking with frustration and wills the last bit of connection out of sheer spite. The last message gets through before cutting off completely.-

(DIRK): ...

(DIRK): There you go.

JAKE: -He is just never going to stop being tearstruck at this point. Obligatorily hands BGD his shades.-

JAKE: -His vision is swimming as his hand drops, looking at brain ghost now. Dirk knows Jake loves him doesn't he? Of course he does, a voice tells Jake predictably. It's what he wants to hear, it's the truth that he knows deep down in his heart and it's what BGD was basically scripted to say.-

JAKE: -So why was he still so miserable? He's gotta ask anyway.-

JAKE: He knows i love him right? Id do anything for him?

(DIRK): ... Of course he knows that.

(DIRK): He's probably driving himself up a wall cuz he can't tell you the same thing.

JAKE: -wipes at his nose.- I miss him something tremendous.

JAKE: You would think dodging near death experiences on a regular basis would make this easier to bear. But it doesnt.

JAKE: It really doesnt.

(DIRK): They're coming for you, you know. -he knows this because jake has to know this.-

(DIRK): ... -offers jake his hand to hold-

JAKE: -takes the hand, too dried up to cry in earnest anymore. His shoulders only sag.- At least i have you.

(DIRK): You'll always have me.

JAKE: -keeps their fingers twined together but gives up once their shoulders brush. Just rests his head against BGD, tired all over again.- Jeez louise dirk....

JAKE: Youre always so.

JAKE: You.

(DIRK): It's no coincidence. -leans on him too-

(DIRK): That's the way you want me to be.

JAKE: Shucks. Then i must be stock full of good ideas. -lets his eyes start to drift closed...-

(DIRK): Must be. -yes shhh sleep. it'll get better soon. just believe in that, jake-

JAKE: -having close company to fall asleep with is infitintely better than sleeping alone. Jake has decided this here and now.-