#im 2 lazy 4 thsi | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

smileymoth · 2 months ago

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venting more cuz im sick asf of being the way i am lolz . Every trigger warning ever probably

Its like soooo hard for me to describe how bad thsi shit makes me feèl like i KNOW i can do it i CAN DO SCHOOLWORK i just feel like im mega lazy and not putting in enough effort so i always feel like i need to hurt myself so so much to feel like my struggle is like worth it. Like i keep fantasizing abt hurting myself realllll bad but its like okaayyy it wont like. fix anything? Youll still have to do it?? So like get a grip and just do it. But i on god feel like i cant? I cant? I feel like i cant??? I feel like i need so much help but i cant keep asking for help all the timr bc i need to vocaalize my own thoughts bc thats how the real world works how am i meant to get a job if i cant express my ideas. How have i become so degenerated in my creative ideas over the past 4 years. My god. Probably got to do with not having had a psychologist for 2 years and only seeinf my psychiatrist once in a blue moon (ITS BEEN A YEAR SINCE IVE SEEN THE FUCKER SOON) and my dad died but im over it now. Idk why im so depressed. Why am i so fucking pathetic man. Like get a grip. Literally. Makes me wanna kms how saamatu i am. I constantly fantasize abt hurting mydelf so bad just to show how much im hurting (eewwww i sound so emo) but again. Wont fix anything. And id hide it anyway. But by god i want to. So bad. Everybody has it hard and im not special so i need to suck it up and do it. I cant do this school shit. I also probably cant do a job. Nor anything. I rly should just kill myself unless i wanna become a 30 year old basememnt dweller who still lives with her mom. I neeeeeeed to kill myself theres nothing out there for me. Not skinny enough not smart enough not skilled enough im just mid. Id rather work at rimi but by god i want to be something and not just some random person. But thats a skill issue. The worst part is tjat i believe i can be someone that actually matters. I need to kill myselfffffff. Anyway fucking. Goodnight its too late ill do those stupid moodboards and personas tomorrow when i dont want to kill myself over school (mission impossible)

#moth post #vent

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hunandonly · 8 years ago

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hello tumblr user hunandonly,, you told me to ask you this so pls explain,, how on earth is hunh*n better than god's gift to earth, xiuhan ???? bc honestly, sounds phaké.

noah fence but: hunhan by elaine! and @whatiskanye @xin-squared and @stunningsoo okay!!!so as you know me, being the only hunhan shipper in the gc, struggles and faces oppression 24/7 but heres my essay about why i love them so muhc!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i also wrote a rant before abotu where hunhan is now, and its here in case you want 2 7read it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I LOVE HUNHAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!THATS IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hunhan started at the very beginning, so mama era, the most iconic interview of all time was probably the one in which the k members were asked to describe specific m members, and sehun very willingly chose to describe luhan. he explained there about the two and how close they were, describing their bubble tea dates and how they enjoyed going out together. the words were enforced by kyungsoo, who said that the two were always together!!!!!!!!!nice

this was followed by the second huge interview of sehuns wishes to luhan, who was in china at the time. this also was when we found out about sehuns nickname to luhan, which was “xiao lu” which transllates 2 little dear. sehun continues wishing him good luck and tellls him that “[HE] LOVES [HIM] ALWAYS”!!!!!!!!!!!!!!FycjDKHFIkjc FUKCfhjCKFUkc

continuing on w exo’s disney trip, the two were pretty much inseprable, containing the iconic moment of luhan jumping over a pole so that he didnt have 2 let go of sehuns hand nice

moving on to WOLF ERA!!!!!!!!!!!!!THE BEST FUCKifn Era in the WHOE FUCKIGN WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!the reason why heather says im living in 2013!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!i wold DIE 4 WOLF ERA@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wolf era was the era that really shovved hunhan along!!!!!the iconic moment in which sehun is leanign towarsd luhan and luhan is shy makes my heART HURT,,,,,this is the era in which the two have the spot together in the front at the end. the two were really close this era im just goijng to cry for another five hujndred fuckign hours i have so many emotions and so little time im just going to say that they loved each other very much thtis era this era = highlight of my life

growl era and overdose era were both messy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is when taohun and xiuhan came along!!!!!!!!1 and this was also when the first sm priduced hunhan photo came out, and when luhan left exo@!!!! ncie pLEASE READ THE LINK stated abocve it covers lhunhan through the lost planet to today thanks its really loign and im not goign 2 type it out but i can summarie=ze it w the words cartier and tears pls read it thanks

other key hunhan parts include the little things the two members share!!! luhan has this thing with sehuns chin that he does, which is tapping the bottom slightly. sehun squirms at this but always manages to smile in the end. after luhan left, it is seen that jongin does this to sehun in times when sehuns crying or feeling really down! my friend wrote another analysis in case you want to read that about luhan’s feelings fro sehuns chin

another key hunhan thing is their nicknames. luhan calls sehun sehunnie much like the other members, but sehun calls luhan xiao lu, and hes stillthe only membet r to do so. the rest either call him lu, luhan-hyung, or luhan-ge, ge and hyung both words to use at htee end of names to repect someone older than you

luhan also treats sehun out to bubble tea dates, sehuns favorite flavor being chocolate, and luhans taro. but get this!!!!!!lLUHAN dOESNT LIKE TEA, or tea in general. he prefers coffee(iced americano 2 be eggzact), but luhan brings sehun out every time, the only one willign to be with him, the other members refusing

sehun alsao gets really jealous when other members spend 2 mcuh time with luhan. one time he ignored the stnading pattern so he could stand with luhan, and when mmebers are being too close he gets in between them and turns luhan the other way. when other memebrs are talking with luhan, he looks down and doesnt involve himself in the conversation. i have a masterpost u wanna see it

other little things!!!!!!!!!! if youve watched weekly idol you also know how hunhan shares a daddy kink!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! nice sehun calls luhan son and im goign 2 shut up now b4 angry fans come!!!!!!!!!!!!

sehun also openly tells luhan that he loves him a lot…..and by a lot i mean a lot a lto!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! watch this link 2 be saved of sehun telling luhan he loves him in chinese durin thee intermission of happy camp while im talkign about chinese and sehun SEHUN LEarNED CHINese 2 COMmuNTIcate WITH lUhaN bETTER when WILl uR ufCKIGN faVES evER!!!!!!!! yixing says that hes not the one teaching sehun chiense????????????????/so

WHILE im at it luhan sang lost stars 4 sehun,,,sehun mentioned that lost stars was one of his favortie songs in an interview, and jongin(??) agreed that it was a ncie song, adn a few days later, at luhans first solo concert, luhan sand lost stars………im really

idk i just find hunhan so beautiful and pure and sweet and loving that i really cant do anything about it ;(((((((((((((((((((((how can u even ship x*uhan?????????????????? change ur ways hunhan is the purest thing ever and the best hte cutest the most pure they jsut love each other so much and i have big hopes 4 them

#if u want a ficrec i can help u @sam #this is a lot shorter tahn i expected #ilu ren but this thing w u and xiuhan gotta stop #im 2 lazy 4 thsi #hunhan #so lucky to be your love #sehun #luhan #im gign 2 cry #rant time

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nnorsae · 7 years ago

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Tagged by @dee-the-witch thank you so much! i rarely do these but eh i’mma do my best ^^

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag people

THE LAST:

1. Drink: Milk 2. Phone call: i think it was mom? maybe my dad? 3. Text message: yeah, my friend ^^ 4. Song you listened to: imagine dragons - thunder 5. Time you cried: haaa just a while ago

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: i never dated anyone 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: nah i also never kissed someone 8. Been cheated on: no. 9. Lost someone special: dissociated. our relationship got lost in the mist. 10. Been depressed: oh well i’ve been falling in and out of it, but i’m trying really hard to recover. 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: i never even tho im okay with drinking

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12-14. all shades of green, blue and red

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: a lot of them and i love them all!!! 16. Fallen out of love: it all got lost in the mist. 17. Laughed until you cried: oh, long time ago. didn’t had anyone to laugh with. 18. Found out someone was talking about you: haa i mean i hope no one does, because i get really tense or nervous when i hear my name in another ppl conversations (usually i await mocking) 19. Met someone who changed you: i got closer to such person. but did not meet them, i think i knew them for like a year or so? 20. Found out who your friends are: kinda? i mean i like getting to know a person better (even for the worst) 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: um no

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them i think 23. Do you have any pets: i do have an smol angry birb, an playful smol angry cat and two dogs who want to eat each other alive 24. Do you want to change your name: i dunno lol i got used to it? like that’s just how ppl call me. i would badly get used to a new name tho. 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: oh i dunno fell deeper into depression? we had a party, it wasn’t the best but i still at least got my apple cake! 26. What time did you wake up: about 5 am and then slept for another hour

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: i was on tumblr still and probably studying or something like that? maybe procrastinating?

28. Name something you can’t wait for: well my trip to Opava w my choir

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: she just went to sleep 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: lol get my life together? i mean everything always goes wrong but thats cuz my laziness and everything so i guess stop being so lazy. 31. What are you listening to right now: i’m letting phone do it’s own thing but right now? imagine dragons - gold 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: m classmate i don’t talk to him tho he’s kinda weird 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: right now? myself probably. pull yourself together boy 34. Most visited website:well this hellsite, bakaláři cause i don’t know what’s happening and? ?? uhhhh google search 35. Mole/s: i have like quite lot of em but like everywhere on my body 36. Mark/s: i mean my legs still have my cut marks, my both ankles have mark after being stitched n stuff, i have an mark after stitch on my head (sliced it thank to glass table) else just bruises and cat scratches 37. Childhood dream: i. always. wanted. something. fairytailey!!!! i love princess or like kingdoms and empires kind of fantasy plus elves or like with different creatures from the forest? i always played the mage/hunter princess as a kid so yeah? something like that would be nice. 38. Hair color: dirt blonde with like one very blond bang its not that visible unless on direct light 39. Long or short hair: short hairrr 40. Do you have a crush on someone: its occasional. like i try to keep my distance because i almost always fall in love who just slightly shows some care about me? like okay not always but if we’re really good friends i just can’t help it... ts could so something bout this too 41. What do you like about yourself?: the only thing thats i feel is very me. my stubborness. when i am sure of something you can’t change my mind. it happens rarely but i still possess this weird trait and it’s kinda nice to be determined for once in a while? i mean i also want to prove ppl wrong especially when they say something mean and i don’t have my depression episode... like calmly laugh it off and then do what they fucking think you can’t cause fuck em. they didn’t see it doesn’t matter. you did it. you know you’re able to do it and you’ve proven yourself worthy. 42. Piercings: i have ear piercings but i almost never wear earrings so they’re pretty useless. 43. Blood type: B+ i think. 44. Nickname: Kilda (based off my last name? surrname? what the hell is příjmení in english) and Smartie (im smart when im not in school and it sucks) 45. Relationship status: im like very unexperienced and also single. probably forever. 46. Zodiac: im libra but somehow i relate more to taurus 47. Pronouns: nonbinary (but got used to calling she/her. i see myself more masculine but like not that it matters that much it would be kinda confusing) 48. Favorite TV Show(s): I don’t watch TV? But i guess Friends, since it’s the only show i was able to see few episodes off 50. Right or left hand: im right handed but sometimes i suck at right so i use left!!! 51. Surgery: never had one 52. Hair dyed in different color: i wish. i want to bleach my hair. like not completely white but like to make it more blonde i guess. not like yellow blonde but more like platinum blonde? soft blonde. i dunno how to explain it 53. Sport: i like ball sports except for basketball. i swim and snorchel tho 55. Vacation: i always wanted to go to norway and iceland. i have to someday. 56. Pair of trainers: dark blue vans my best friends

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: i really like pizza 58. Drinking: coffee, milk or water 59. I’m about to: sleep 61. Waiting for: something to open my eyes 62. Want: just a really good friend? i feel like i need to hug someone 63. Get married: my parents want me to, but honestly? i’ll see how it turns out because i kinda don’t want things to happen as my parents want so yeah i’ll see how things turns out 64. Career: i wanted to be like an illustrator/writer but like not even half sure dude

WHICH IS BETTER

65. Hugs or kisses: i never been kissed but hugs are nice 66. Lips or eyes: eyes 67. Shorter or taller: i have no preference 68. Older or younger: older 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: wtf 71. Sensitive or loud: i kinda like both?? theyre so precious 72. Hook up or relationship: listen i cant get it on with a hook up i literally hate hook ups because i suffer from something called not being attracted to someone unless i know them well?? 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: depends. I’m usually hesitant tho.

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a Stranger: never tahnks 75. Drank hard liquor: i though it was a water ok i didnt knew my granny wanted to drink some hard alcohol in a water glass 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: i broke em? but never lost em 77. Turned someone down: yeah i did. i feel bad but it’s like long time ago. 78. Sex on the first date: wtf ppl 79. Broken someone’s heart: i hope i didn’t 80. Had your heart broken: yeah... 81. Been arrested: broke the law few times but they never caught me 82. Cried when someone died: yeah.... 83. Fallen for a friend: OH BOY I FEEL PERSONALLY ATTACKED RIGHT NOW (yes i did and like i guess they didnt know and still i wouldnt even confess to them so it wouldn’t really matter)

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. Yourself: im trying my best to 85. Miracles: hell yeah 86. Love at first sight: no? 87. Santa Claus: that fat man can go back where he came from 88. Kiss on the first date: i mean if they want to?? it would be really akward tho jesus christ...

OTHER:

90. Current best friend name: I don’t have one, sadly. 91. Eye colour: Light green but people usually say it’s blue or grey 92. Favourite movie: i dunno man i like horror movies but i don’t have my favorite

Everyone who wants to do thsi feel free to do it!! i can’t think of ppl who i would tag @chibipu maybe?? only if you want to tho

#personal #tagged

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tetroxy · 8 years ago

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glitchingdj started following you

hi!!! im roxy strilonde tho (msotly bc im waaayy 2 lazy 4 a propr nicknme) ppl call me oxy im workin asa chef lateatnight att thsi restaurnt 4 now till i finlly get thsi genetics lab a total BABE deisgned 4 me built i own lik lmao 6 cats n an espurr i paint inmy free tim an seem 2 bake 2 much latly

wasup whor u???

#ic

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goodgodno · 8 years ago

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1. What’s your middle name, and do you like it? - not telling, and no 2. are you artistic? -i guess 3. Have you had your first kiss? -Ofc not im aidan fucking casey (anyone hmu im lonely) 4. What is your life goal? -to influence people 5. Do you have any experiences with a famous person? -i once tweeted at casey neistat and he didnt respond 6. Do you play any sports? -not any more 7. What’s your worst fear? -failure 8. Who’s your biggest inspiration? -probably casey neistat 9. Do you have any cool talents? -i can freak people out by looking at them 10. are you a morning person? -yeah if im not woken up early 11. How do you feel about pet names? -the closest i get to that is calling someone B 12. Do you like to read? -yeah but i dont read as much as id like to 13. Name a list of shows that have changed your life.- does casey neistats vlog count? (Ill shut up with the casey neistat) 14. Do you care about your follower count?- i do on my rinsta, but it bothers me that people feel validated based off of numbers like that (likes etc) 15. What’s the best dream you’ve had? -i dont remember my dreams- the weirdest dream i had was that everyone i knew was trans 16. Have you ever kissed someone of your same gender? -by accident once (does that count?) 17. Do you have any pets?- I have a kitten named Rocket and a full grown cat named Oreo (who is dying of multiple cases of cancer) 18. Are you religious? - Im pretty agnostic, and the catholic church disgusts me 19. Are you a people person?- definitely 20. Are you considered popular?- i try not to think in terms like that, but i guess i have a lot of friends? 21. What is one of your bad habits?- procrastination 22. What’s something that makes you feel vulnerable?- depression 23. What would you name your children? - ill name one of em’ Casey to fuck with them 24. Who’s your celebrity crush? - Emma Watson? 25. What’s your best subject?- Best- French, Favorite- Art 26. Dogs or cats? Doggos 27. most used social media besides tumblr?- Snapchat/INstagram 28. best friends name? I dont categorize people as best friends, but matt and sara are my oldest friends 29. who does your main family consist of? mostly my grandmother and grandfather tbh 30. Chocolate or sugar? SUGAR 31. have you ever been on a date? no 32. Do you like roller coasters? n0 33. Can you swim? n.O 34. What would you do in the event of an apocalypse? hide in a school with a weapon 35. Have you struggled with any kind of mental disorder? self-diagnosed depression? (dont worry i too am rolling my eyes) 36. Are your parents together? barely 37. What’s your favorite color? anything 38. What country are you from/do you live in? ‘MURCA (fuck yeah) 39. Favorite singer? whatever’s on 40. Do you see yourself being famous some day? i wish 41. Do you like dresses? no 42. Favorite song right now? All Night- Parov Stelar 43. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? im fine with it ironically, or as a joke, but if people are talking about it literallt shit gets weird 44. How old were you when you first got your period? did you just assume my gender? 45. Have you ever shot a gun? yep 46. Have you ever done yoga? nope 47. Are you a horror girl? did you just assume my gender? 48. Are you good at giving advice? i like to think that I am, but like i dont take my own advice 49. Tell us a story about your childhood. no fuck off 50. How are you doing today? meh 51. Were you a cute kid? i was thicc af 52. Can you dance? when nobody is looking im good 53. Is there anything you do that you can’t remember ever not doing? twirling pens 54. Have you ever dyed your hair? yea and im still recoiling from all of the people that called me a fag 55. What color are your eyes? BLUE 56. What’s your favorite animal? squirrels? 57. Have you ever made a huge fool of yourself? hell yeah man i do it like 3x a day 58. Do you have a good relationship with your parents? not really 59. Do you have good friends? most of them are 8/8 m8 60. Are you close with anyone of the lgbtq+ group? sure 61. What’s your favorite class? Studio Art? I put the most effort into it, and its where i get my lowest grades 62. List all the tv shows you are watching. not watching any atm 63. Are you organized? I try to be but i evenually get lazy and shit collapses 64. What was the last movie you saw? Opinion? Inside Out- I’m still super sh00k 65. Which tv character do you relate to most?- bob ross i guess i dont watch that much tv 68. What are some things that stand between you and complete happiness?- reality 69. If you received enough money to never need to work again, what would you spend your time doing?- I’d like to think I’d do something super cool and revolutionary but to be real id probably buy a lot of expensive shit and never do anything 70. What would you change about your life if you knew you would never die? I’d be a little less afraid of failure, because I’d have more chances 71. What would you do differently if you knew that no one was judging you? I’d dye my hair and shit 72. If you could start over, what would you do differently?- a lot of shit that I wont write here 73. Would you break the law to save a loved one?- depends on the law/ who 74. When was the last time you traveled somewhere new?- I went to The Grand Canyon last summer 75. When you think of your home, what immediately comes to mind?- I think of my grandmother’s house 76. What have you done to pursue your dreams lately? How about today?- I’m stuck in thsi existential gridlock where i know what i want to be but i dont know what to do next 77. What did you want to be when you were a kid?- happy 78. If you dropped everything to pursue your dreams, what would you be risking?- most of the safety and stability of everything around me 79.When did you not speak up, when you know you really should have?- no idea; i push that shit out of my head 80. Describe the next five years of your life, and your plans, in a single sentence.- highschool, then college. 81. What would happen if you never wasted another minute of your life, what would that look like?- I wouldnt sleep, and that would be pretty shit 82. If you could live forever, how would you spend eternity?- trying to kill myself (I dont want to live forever) 83. How would you spend a billion dollars? on myself 84. If you could time travel, would you go to the past or the future? past, but id want to go back 85. What motivates you to succeed?- nothing, and thats my problem 86. What dream that you’ve had has resonated with you the most? idk yet 87. Would you rather live in the city or the woods? Why? City- i need to be around lots of people 88. Do you believe in life after death? No 89. What teacher inspired you the most? How did they? So far, i guess Andrea Lee 90. What’s your fondest childhood memory? Gramma R’s house 91. If you could have dinner with any one person, living or dead, who would they be and why? My grampa dave, he seemed like a cool guy 92. What would you have to see to cry tears of joy? Idk 93. What is the hardest lesson you had to learn in life? Idk 94. What do you think happens after we die? We get buried/cremated 95. What would you do if you would be invisible? Walk around naked 96. What’s something you can’t do no matter how hard you try? Avoid awkwardness 97. Would you want to choose the sex and appearance of your offspring? Yeah i guess 98. How did your first crush develop? We were friends for a while and i guess it just evolved from there 99. Is there a feeling you are trying to ignore? What is it? Idk man 100. Do you live or do you just exist? You live

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