#ikemen sengoku fruitverse

[leonscape]

A Pear of Lovers

Mitsunari x Pear, a crack fic

It's quite the wholesome relationship so please enjoy :)

@drewadoodle

Word Count: 508

After force feeding Mitsunari like a baby bird, Hideyoshi finally managed to pull Mitsunari out of his trance. Mitsunari got sucked into his reading and he didn’t realize the sun had already set and the moon was rising in the sky.

“You have to start taking care of yourself,” Hideyoshi scolded.

“My apologies, I got distracted.” He bowed deeply.

“No need to apologize. Just get some rest,” Hideyoshi sighed, “I appreciate your hard work.”

The next day, Mitsunari gave his report to Hideyoshi. Although he was pleased with his work, Hideyoshi wasn’t too happy about the dark circles under Mitsunari’s eyes. After they concluded their official business, Hideyoshi gave Mitsunari a special gift.

“Oh! My lord, you don’t need to give me anything,” Mitsunari politely refused.

“Just take this and enjoy it, okay?” Hideyoshi pushed a basket of fresh fruits towards Mitsunari.

“Oh, okay. Thank you, Lord Hideyoshi.” He accepted the basket.

Later that day, Mitsunari decided to try the fruits. It was a great assortment, lots of variety, and quite refreshing.

But there was only one that stole his heart. The pear. It was the juiciest fruit he’s ever eaten. The skin was firm and the flesh was supple. It was sweet, but not overbearing. Mitsunari was refreshed and ready to get to work.

His lovely pear sat beside him as he read. It was hard for him to get lost in his reading. Instead, his eyes would always drift over to the pear. Everytime his gaze landed on the pear, he would smile and giggle.

“Lady Pear, you’re so amazing,” Mitsunari complimented. He loved Lady Pear’s company.

Hideyoshi opened the door to Mitsunari’s room to check on him. But he was utterly shocked when Mitsunari’s eyes left the book. “Uh, Mitsunari? I was just checking on you, I didn’t mean to barge in or anything,” Hideyoshi said.

“Oh it’s okay. I appreciate you coming to check on me,” he said.

Hideyoshi saw the emptied basket next to him and he got excited. “Oh! Did you enjoy the fruits?”

“Yes, they were quite tasty,” Mitsunari replied. His gaze drifted back to his pear once more.

“Good! That’s great!” Hideyoshi saw the pear next to him. “Uh, do you not like pears?”

“What? Oh no, I love pears,” Mitsunari said. He picked Lady Pear up and cuddled her.

Hideyoshi’s smile faded as the scene unfolded. Mitsunari happily sighed as he nuzzled and tenderly gazed at Lady Pear. “Um, what- what are you doing with that pear?” he asked nervously.

“Pears are so lovely,” Mitsunari said. “They smell so sweet and they’re so… juicy! Even the shape is attractive too, right? And this brown color is great, right?” He did his best to describe and compliment Lady Pear.

“Huh?” The sheer confusion on Hideyoshi’s face went unnoticed as Mitsunari only looked at Lady Pear. “No… No, this can’t be happening…”

The room spun as Hideyoshi came to the realization that Mitsunari had fallen in love with a pear. Hideyoshi’s jaw dropped; he accidentally made his worst nightmare come true.

[leonscape]

Coconut Companion

Masamune x Coconut, a crack fic

The Fruitverse is growing. Now introducing the cocomune ship @drewadoodle

Word Count: 459

Masamune was in the kitchen, cooking up something new. He joyfully hummed as he whisked the ingredients together. Masamune wasn’t the type to shy away from experimenting, so here he was, mixing the coconut milk in with the rice flour. The old merchant that had sold the coconuts to him gave him detailed instructions on how to open and extract all the coconut products.

And it was then that Masamune had fallen in love. He loved the possibilities of all the new yummy dishes he could make with this new ingredient. After carefully husking and cracking the coconuts, he had fresh supplies of coconut water and coconut meat. Finely chopping the meat, blending it with the coconut water, then straining it gave him the sweetest coconut milk, just like the merchant said. 

It wasn’t long before Masamune’s new coconut mochi was born. He stuffed it with white bean paste, which was mixed with a bit of coconut flakes. One taste, and Masamune fell even more in love with the precious coconut.

The coconut water was helpful with hydration, coconut milk was amazing in all kinds of sweet treats, and with further processing, the coconut oil helped with dry skin especially during the harsh winter. 

In Masamune’s eyes, his lovely coconut was perfect in every way. Eventually, he began to carry a coconut everywhere he went. Sometimes he would draw on his coconut, either a small little doodle or a face. He always doted on his companion and showed his love and affection. 

Of course Mamayoshi had to intervene based on growing concerns. The coconut was always at war council and he even brought it to actual battles of war. “Um, Masamune, do you really need to bring your coconut companion to these meetings?” Hideyoshi questioned.

“Of course I do,” Masamune answered.

Mitsuhide chuckled with a pineapple in hand, “He’s grown fond of a coconut, so let him be. Never wanting to part is normal.”

“But he does… weird things to it,” Hideyoshi said. 

The coconut innocently rested on Masamune’s lap and he gently caressed the coconut. Mitsuhide snickered, “My, my, you’ve got a dirty mind, Hideyoshi.”

“What? No I don’t! I was just trying to say that it’s a bit too distracting. I mean we already allowed you to bring your pineapple to the meetings, but we can’t have more distractions here,” Hideyoshi explained. 

“Why are you so concerned? This doesn’t provide any distractions, right Lord Nobunaga?” Mitsuhide asked.

“No, do as you wish. But first I would like to finish this meeting,” Nobunaga answered. 

And so they continued without further interruption. After they concluded the meeting, Masamune took his coconut back to his room for some alone time. He cherished the coconut, cleaning it and cuddling it after.

[leonscape]

Mitsuhide's Pineapples

Mitsuhide x Pineapple; a crack fic that's not historically accurate because back in the Sengoku era, they didn't have pineapples yet T_T

I don't know what this is but enjoy.

Word Count: 483

Mitsuhide tenderly gazed at the pineapple. He hugged the pineapple, cradling it in his chest. The pineapple’s skin was rough and prickly, but Mitsuhide didn’t mind at all. Its sweet scent wafted in the air as the pineapple had ripened over the course of the week. He cherished every moment with his pineapple for his joy was not something permanent. 

Kyubei’s voice interrupted Mitsuhide, “My lord, you have visitors.”

“Is it important?” Mitsuhide asked. 

“Yes, quite urgent,” Kyubei replied.

“All right, then.” Mitsuhide put his beloved pineapple aside. Hideyoshi, Mitsunari, Nobunaga, Masamune, and even Ieyasu entered the room. “My, I didn’t expect such a large audience so suddenly.”

“Mitsuhide we came to talk,” Hideyoshi put on his stern parent voice.

“About what?” Mitsuhide chuckled.

“You’ve been really obsessed with pineapples, and we’re just here to make sure you haven’t stuck anything in a place where it doesn’t belong,” a shameless Masamune blatantly said. Hideyoshi delivered a swift slap to the back of Masamune’s head and he winced at the unexpected attack,”Ow, that kinda hurt.”

“I wouldn’t have put it like that, but we’re worried about you,” Hideyoshi said. Mitsunari looked confused. His gaze traveled between Mitsuhide and the pineapple.

“This is getting weird,” Ieyasu mumbled. 

“Mitsuhide,” Nobunaga spoke, his tone commanding and firm, ” you must relinquish that pineapple.” He pointed to the harmless pineapple next to Mitsuhide. 

“What is the meaning of this?” Mitsuhide questioned.

“An intervention,” Ieyasu replied. “Your pineapple obsession is getting out of hand.”

“Yeah, you’re wasting food,” Masamune chimed in. 

Mitsuhide held his pineapple close. He shook his head as he softly sighed, “You wouldn’t get it. The connection that my lovely pineapple and I share is something none of you could understand. He was getting emotional, not like the usual quick-witted and calculating kitsune he was best known as. 

Mitsunari spoke up, “Well, if you really love that pineapple, then I’m happy for you, Lord Mitsuhide.” His smile was bright and angelic, truly accepting of Mitsuhide and his pineapple lover.

“Huh?!” Ieyasu exclaimed. 

“As long as Lord Mistuhide is happy, we shouldn’t interfere with his happiness,” Mitsunari said. 

“Well… you do have a point,” Hideyoshi agreed after giving it some thought. “But it would be preferable if he wasn’t hoarding pineapples and wasting them because he refuses to eat his lover.” There were a bunch of pineapples gathered in the corner, like a little pineapple family.

“How about we make something with all these pineapples before they go bad?” Masamune suggested. 

“You will not lay a finger on my precious pineapples,” Mitsuhide refused. 

“Mitsuhide, surrender your pineapples,” Nobunaga commanded. Mitsuhide frowned in response. 

“Come on, Mitsuhide, give them up,” Hideyoshi encouraged. 

Eventually, Mitsuhide gave his pineapples to Masamune. Chef Masamune turned his pineapples into desserts, glazes for some meat dishes, and garnish for others. They had a pineapple feast as Mitsuhide mourned the loss of his pineapple. 

Fun fact: pineapples were brought to Japan from Taiwan in the 1920's and they were planted in Okinawa and pineapples became a major crop for Okinawa.

[leonscape]

The Passion of Two Lovers

Keiji x Passion Fruit; a crack fic

I know that most people probably know the passion fruit as purple but here I'm using the yellow one because it's the one I grew up with.

Word Count: 640

@drewadoodle

Nobody knows where Keiji gets his fruits from. They appear in crates and he gives them out to soldiers. They're sour, a refreshing boost of energy. The tanginess spreads on your tongue and the muscles in your face respond by scrunching and twisting. It’s the perfect fruit for the wild child Keiji Maeda. The passion fruit. The seeds inside are edible, adding a nice crunch among the tart flesh.

Keiji ate some fruit and gave some to his pet pig, Jisei. They sat in the shade of a tree as the wind gently blew through the area. It was days like these that made the passion fruit taste even sweeter. He scooped everything out of the rind with a spoon and slurped them up like soup. 

“Ah, I guess I was lucky today. This one happens to be very sweet,” Keiji sighed in satisfaction. Jisei oinked in agreement. “Well, I should probably get back,” Keiji said to Jisei and the pig oinked once more. He picked up his little crate of the lovely passion fruits and went on his way.

Keiji plastered a smile on his face before entering the training hall. “All right boys, let’s do our best!” 

His voice was full of boisterous energy and packed a punch. All the soldiers responded with the same amount of energy and they all echoed in the training hall, ready to train their hardest. He set the crate down in an unused quiet corner, a safe place for the precious fruits. 

Everyone gave their best efforts into their practice. By the end, everyone was exhausted. Some were sprawled on the floor, others leaned against the wall, and the ones out of their minds were still standing, sparring against each other.

Keiji retrieved his fruits and shared them with the others. One soldier spoke up, “But isn’t this your favorite fruit? Are you sure you want to share it with us?” 

“Of course! Why else would I bring this here?” Keiji said in his loud, cheerful voice. It was a bonding moment for all the soldiers as they shared the fruit. Secretly, Keiji threw longing glances at the passion fruits. He wished he could be alone with his beloved fruit, but it would look too suspicious if he had that many passion fruit in his room. It was too much for one person and their pet pig to eat by themselves. 

There was a sudden commotion as the soldiers stood up for a respectful greeting of a commander. Hideyoshi. He entered the room and Keiji inwardly sighed in annoyance. 

“Keiji, I was just coming to check on you. But why is everyone eating these fruits?” Hideyoshi questioned. 

“I had a whole load of them so I decided to share some with everyone! Isn’t this great?” Keiji said. He looked around, watching everyone enjoy the passion fruit. Hideyoshi looked traumatized as he observed everyone. 

“Um, well I suppose it’s okay. There’s no conflict and everyone is getting along,” Hideyoshi said. “But why do you have this much fruit in the first place?”

“Someone gave it to me for free,” Keiji said, trying to get rid of Hideyoshi’s suspicions. But he narrowed his eyes like a mother glaring at their suspicious teenager. 

“If you say so,” Hideyoshi said. “Well, anyway, don’t forget that we have council this afternoon. Nobunaga expects you to be on time.” 

“Don’t worry, I’ll be on time,” Keiji said. 

Hideyoshi mumbled something incoherent under his breath before walking away. Keiji picked up a passion fruit and softly brushed his thumb over the bright yellow skin. While no one was looking, he allowed himself to frown just a bit. Hiding his passion for his favorite fruit was harder than he thought.

[leonscape]

In a Bit of a Pickle...d Plum

Kenshin x Pickled Plums (wow this is such a shocking pair); A crack fic (a woefully uninspired fic)

Kasugayama runs out of pickles and Kenshin gets extra stabby when he doesn't have his beloved plums to enjoy with his drink.

Word Count: 917 @drewadoodle

Kasugayama was bustling with energy as the warlords and vassals celebrated with a banquet. Shingen was enjoying his drink with Yukimura and Yoshimoto while Kanetsugu kept Kenshin company and Sasuke tried to go unnoticed.

But Kenshin wouldn’t let Sasuke escape. Kenshin’s stash of pickled plums were running low so he asked Sasuke to get him more. 

“My lord, I regret to inform you that there are no more pickled plums available,” Sasuke told him. Everyone in attendance went silent when the news reached their ears. It was so quiet that the crickets outside were the loudest things in the area. 

“What do you mean there’s no more pickled plums?” Kenshin narrowed his eyes. 

“There are no pickled plums ready for consumption,” Sasuke told him. Kenshin’s hand went to his sword.

“I will get some for you, my lord,” Kanetsugu spoke up. He stood up, bowed and left the room. Kenshin’s hand moved away from his sword.

By the time Kanetsugu got back, it was late into the night and most of the vessels and warlords had already gone home. Kenshin was still sitting there, sipping sake, moping. Sasuke’s expressionless face looked more traumatized than usual. Yukimura looked sick while Yoshimoto seemed interested in something else and Shingen was sitting there dozing off. 

“These are the last batch of pickled plums,” Kanetsugu said as he presented it to Kenshin.

Kenshin looked very pleased. “Perfect. I can enjoy my last cup of sake.”

The next day, Kenshin called an emergency meeting. Yukimura, Shingen, Yoshimoto, Sasuke, and Kanetsugu gathered around when Kenshin announced, “We will get pickled plums from somewhere else.”

Kanetsugu volunteered himself without hesitation. Yukimura complained, and Shingen was rambling about how he could get his spies to acquire pickled plums. Yoshimoto didn’t seem to be too interested in the pickled plum operation as he was distracted by something else. “Sasuke, go with him,” Kenshin commanded. Sasuke obeyed, bowing his head without protest. 

And so, Kanetsugu and Sasuke set out for Azuchi; they agreed on going to Azuchi because they could gather information while getting pickled plums. 

“Should we split up the work?” Sasuke asked. “You get the plums and I’ll get some info?” Kanetsugu agreed and the two went their separate ways. 

Kanetsugu wandered around the streets of Azuchi, on the lookout for pickled plums. Instead of finding pickled plums, he bumped into a pig on the street. The pig had a little passion fruit in its mouth and Kanetsugu knew exactly who the pig belonged to. And there was the pig’s owner, running to catch up. “Yo Kanetsugu, fancy meeting you here,” Keiji greeted him. His smile was big and bright as he scooped up the pig into his arms.

“Keep your voice down,” he told Keiji. “I’m here to collect merchandise.”

“What kind of merchandise?” Keiji raised a brow. 

“Pickled plums,” he answered. 

Keiji burst into boisterous laughter, “I thought it was more serious than that.”

“It’s very serious. My lord requires a wealthy supply of pickled plums.”

“Come, I’ll show you a good place for those plums,” Keiji said. 

Meanwhile in Echigo, in the depths of Kasugayama castle, Kenshin visited his personal stash of pickled plums. They were still in the process of fermentation, so they quietly sat, untouched and undisturbed. Kenshin’s lips spread into a smile that was full of endearment. “Ferment well, my little plums,” he told them as if he was tucking his children in. He closed the door and left them alone. His face immediately fell into a frown when he was reminded of the fact that they still had a few months left before they could be enjoyed. 

Everyone made sure to stay out of Kenshin’s broody mood. However, Yukimura unfortunately couldn’t escape it. 

He was dodging attacks left and right while Kenshin never broke a sweat. Shingen was watching the whole thing unfold in front of him. He shook his head and sighed, “Kenshin, I think he’s had enough.” 

“But we just got started,” Kenshin replied. 

“We started an hour ago?!” Yukimura shouted. 

“That was just the warm up,” Kenshin said. 

Yukimura groaned as he defended himself. “I hope they come back soon with those plums because I can’t do this every single day!” 

Kanetsugu was hoarding plums. He and Sasuke met up and Keiji sent them back on their way to Echigo. 

“Did you buy their entire stock?” Sasuke asked. 

“Yes,” Kanetsugu responded. 

“Oh.” Sasuke went quiet as he made some mental calculations. “We’ll have to stop frequently to let the horses rest from all that weight.” Kanetsugu just grunted in understanding and silence fell upon them. 

When they reached Kasugayama Castle, the two dismounted and immediately took the horses to rest before reporting back to Kenshin. Kanetsugu showed Kenshin the goods and a genuine expression of happiness graced his face. “Well done,” Kenshin praised. “We shall have a banquet to celebrate.”

“Oh dear,” Sasuke mumbled.

That night, Kenshin enjoyed his sake with his beloved plums; he was surrounded by jars of plums. The smile on his face was so bright that it was almost creepy. Simply going near the plums would earn a death glare from Kenshin too. But even though Kenshin was feeling extra possessive over his plums, the night ended without incident. 

“Sasuke,” he called out, “help me take these plums to my room.” He was slightly tipsy as he transported his plums. Sasuke sighed and assisted him. When they finished, Sasuke tucked Kenshin into bed and bid him and his plums good night.

[leonscape]

pls help us decide the next suitor that will be flirting with fruit

[leonscape]

Lychee Lover

Kanetsugu x Lychee; A crack fic

There's nothing wrong with having a comfort fruit <3 anyways have this low quality fic i just mashed together. also i really couldn't think of a clever title so yeah im sorry. also x2 i love lychee too (not really artificial flavor but the actual fruit itself)

Word Count: 644

@drewadoodle

Kenshin sent Kanetsugu and Sasuke on a mission. It was only a short trip to a neighboring daimyo for his birthday. He was friendly, honest, and loyal but he was also getting older. Still, maintaining relations is important and Kanetsugu took his work very seriously. They were prepared with gifts; the best sake, some fresh fruits of the season, and other fine products of Echigo. 

The elderly daimyo warmly welcomed them into his home. It was rare to live up to an old age and so of course it was a joyous occasion that needed to be celebrated. 

The old man preferred to share his gifts and enjoy them with others. And there was much to share. There were things from other provinces as well as things from overseas. And that’s where he saw it. But it was just by chance; a fruit he’s never seen before. The rough and unwelcoming skin of the fruit protected the supple flesh. But it didn’t bother him when he ran his fingers against the pointy texture of the fruit’s vermillion outer layer. It wasn’t like anything he’s experienced. The pale fruit on the inside was juicy and some were sweet while others were sour. 

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. At first he thought nothing of it. It was just a fruit after all. But Kanetsugu couldn’t stop himself. Maybe he didn’t want to stop himself. He yearned for his beloved fruit everyday. He always set a limit for how much time he could enjoy them. But his discipline was waning. In all its glory, the lychee rested in bunches at his side as he read next to the soft yellow glow of the lamp. Sometimes he would read out loud to the lychee. Other times he would enjoy the silence and softly smile at them. 

“What is the meaning of this?” Kenshin asked. His mismatched eyes widened at the sight of the fruit in Kanetsugu’s room. 

“My lord.” Kanetsugu politely bowed. “This is my favorite fruit.”

Kenshin narrowed his eyes. He wasn’t doing anything out of the ordinary. Kanetsugu’s books were open and he was reading like usual. He hadn’t been acting differently, nor had he been slacking off. “We’ll be gathering for council early today,” he told Kanetsugu. He nodded and Kenshin left. 

There was no room for Kenshin to judge or tell him he couldn’t, not with his large stash of his favorite pickled plums. But that didn’t mean he was safe from judgment. People whispered all kinds of nasty things, but that didn’t stop Kanetsugu from enjoying his favorite fruit. 

August came and Kanetsugu would celebrate another birthday. He didn’t expect it to be special or celebrated. But Kenshin demanded he attend his own birthday celebration. Reluctantly, Kanetsugu agreed. Sasuke escorted the birthday boy to the main hall and they surprised him with a nice celebration feast. Kanetsugu wasn’t particularly interested in the festivities. Sasuke had insisted on getting gifts for Kanetsugu, and so the gift exchange proceeded. Yoshimoto gifted him a fruit, one that he’s never had an interest in. Shingen got him a new kimono and Yukimura got him a pair of sandals to match. Sasuke got him some books, but it was Kenshin’s gift that pleased him the most. 

It was a small little sapling. A lychee tree sapling. Of course he was grateful for all of his presents, but it was the sapling that stole his heart. 

He took care of it everyday, watering and nurturing the plant. When the sapling outgrew the pot it was in, Kanetsugu planted it in the ground. He hoped that it would be able to provide something for the people who come across the tree in the future. But for now, he took comfort in the simple shade of the tree. It wasn’t much, but it was a safe and relaxing place.

[leonscape]

Ikemen Sengoku Fruitverse Masterlist

We love fruits. @ikefruits

Mitsuhide's Pineapples Coconut Companion (Masamune) A Pear of Lovers (Mitsunari) The Passion of Two Lovers (Keiji) In a Bit of a Pickle...d Plum (Kenshin)

[leonscape]

i can't find the poll from last time

[leonscape]

🎧 A WIP for WIP Wednesday, let me hear it! 🎧

hello wip anon long time no see 😸 how are you doing?

here’s what i got: the next installment of the ikesen fruitverse

Keiji ate some fruit and even gave some to his pet pig, Jisei. They sat in the shade of a tree as the wind gently blew through the area. It was days like these that made his beloved fruit taste even sweeter. He scooped everything out of the rind with a spoon and slurped them up like soup.

anyways yeah that’s all i have tbh i haven’t been working on much else.

[leonscape]

Welcome to my Blog!

I go by Sui, she/her, 21. This blog shall be 18+ however I’d still like it to remain more on the SFW side. I’m really just awkward with those types of things. I also interact with NSFW blogs, so just to be safe, minors please do not interact. 

I play mostly Ikemen Series; Ikemen Sengoku, Ikemen Revolution, Ikemen Vampire, and Ikemen Prince.

What I'm currently working on: Ikemen Prince AU Series Masterlist

About: The noble beasts of Rhodolite are turned human after they experience their very own once-in-a-lifetime love. After years of pain and hardships, their souls have come to experience the purity of true love. (Each prince has their own love interest, all with their own background and stories!)

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Ikemen Sengoku Fruitverse Masterlist -> Suitors x Fruits; crack fics

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Writer's Block (Reader x Comte); suggestive

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My Suitor Ranking List

My Suitor Ranking List update 1

A list of asexual characters (hc's)

[limonzu]

Yes... this is what I need... something quick and Goofy but wholesome to doodle.....

A Pear of Lovers

Mitsunari x Pear, a crack fic

It's quite the wholesome relationship so please enjoy :)

@drewadoodle

Word Count: 508

After force feeding Mitsunari like a baby bird, Hideyoshi finally managed to pull Mitsunari out of his trance. Mitsunari got sucked into his reading and he didn’t realize the sun had already set and the moon was rising in the sky.

“You have to start taking care of yourself,” Hideyoshi scolded.

“My apologies, I got distracted.” He bowed deeply.

“No need to apologize. Just get some rest,” Hideyoshi sighed, “I appreciate your hard work.”

The next day, Mitsunari gave his report to Hideyoshi. Although he was pleased with his work, Hideyoshi wasn’t too happy about the dark circles under Mitsunari’s eyes. After they concluded their official business, Hideyoshi gave Mitsunari a special gift.

“Oh! My lord, you don’t need to give me anything,” Mitsunari politely refused.

“Just take this and enjoy it, okay?” Hideyoshi pushed a basket of fresh fruits towards Mitsunari.

“Oh, okay. Thank you, Lord Hideyoshi.” He accepted the basket.

Later that day, Mitsunari decided to try the fruits. It was a great assortment, lots of variety, and quite refreshing.

But there was only one that stole his heart. The pear. It was the juiciest fruit he’s ever eaten. The skin was firm and the flesh was supple. It was sweet, but not overbearing. Mitsunari was refreshed and ready to get to work.

His lovely pear sat beside him as he read. It was hard for him to get lost in his reading. Instead, his eyes would always drift over to the pear. Everytime his gaze landed on the pear, he would smile and giggle.

“Lady Pear, you’re so amazing,” Mitsunari complimented. He loved Lady Pear’s company.

Hideyoshi opened the door to Mitsunari’s room to check on him. But he was utterly shocked when Mitsunari’s eyes left the book. “Uh, Mitsunari? I was just checking on you, I didn’t mean to barge in or anything,” Hideyoshi said.

“Oh it’s okay. I appreciate you coming to check on me,” he said.

Hideyoshi saw the emptied basket next to him and he got excited. “Oh! Did you enjoy the fruits?”

“Yes, they were quite tasty,” Mitsunari replied. His gaze drifted back to his pear once more.

“Good! That’s great!” Hideyoshi saw the pear next to him. “Uh, do you not like pears?”

“What? Oh no, I love pears,” Mitsunari said. He picked Lady Pear up and cuddled her.

Hideyoshi’s smile faded as the scene unfolded. Mitsunari happily sighed as he nuzzled and tenderly gazed at Lady Pear. “Um, what- what are you doing with that pear?” he asked nervously.

“Pears are so lovely,” Mitsunari said. “They smell so sweet and they’re so… juicy! Even the shape is attractive too, right? And this brown color is great, right?” He did his best to describe and compliment Lady Pear.

“Huh?” The sheer confusion on Hideyoshi’s face went unnoticed as Mitsunari only looked at Lady Pear. “No… No, this can’t be happening…”

The room spun as Hideyoshi came to the realization that Mitsunari had fallen in love with a pear. Hideyoshi’s jaw dropped; he accidentally made his worst nightmare come true.

[limonzu]

Masanut OTP

Also, I actually saw this fic a while back and sometime later got obsessed with my sen OCs having an obscene amount of coconuts (their mother bought them in bulk and gave them a bunch when they visited Honnoji for their regular wormhole inspection)

Soooo... bonus OC coconut producers?

For reference:

Duke/Kyousuke: Crushes the coconut (and the water goes down through a strainer that collects it) -> Ayumi separates the shell and collects then chops the coconut meat -> Sachiko cooks the meat -> Noboru strains it to separate milk from oil

Coconut Companion

Masamune x Coconut, a crack fic

The Fruitverse is growing. Now introducing the cocomune ship @drewadoodle

Word Count: 459

Masamune was in the kitchen, cooking up something new. He joyfully hummed as he whisked the ingredients together. Masamune wasn’t the type to shy away from experimenting, so here he was, mixing the coconut milk in with the rice flour. The old merchant that had sold the coconuts to him gave him detailed instructions on how to open and extract all the coconut products.

And it was then that Masamune had fallen in love. He loved the possibilities of all the new yummy dishes he could make with this new ingredient. After carefully husking and cracking the coconuts, he had fresh supplies of coconut water and coconut meat. Finely chopping the meat, blending it with the coconut water, then straining it gave him the sweetest coconut milk, just like the merchant said. 

It wasn’t long before Masamune’s new coconut mochi was born. He stuffed it with white bean paste, which was mixed with a bit of coconut flakes. One taste, and Masamune fell even more in love with the precious coconut.

The coconut water was helpful with hydration, coconut milk was amazing in all kinds of sweet treats, and with further processing, the coconut oil helped with dry skin especially during the harsh winter. 

In Masamune’s eyes, his lovely coconut was perfect in every way. Eventually, he began to carry a coconut everywhere he went. Sometimes he would draw on his coconut, either a small little doodle or a face. He always doted on his companion and showed his love and affection. 

Of course Mamayoshi had to intervene based on growing concerns. The coconut was always at war council and he even brought it to actual battles of war. “Um, Masamune, do you really need to bring your coconut companion to these meetings?” Hideyoshi questioned.

“Of course I do,” Masamune answered.

Mitsuhide chuckled with a pineapple in hand, “He’s grown fond of a coconut, so let him be. Never wanting to part is normal.”

“But he does… weird things to it,” Hideyoshi said. 

The coconut innocently rested on Masamune’s lap and he gently caressed the coconut. Mitsuhide snickered, “My, my, you’ve got a dirty mind, Hideyoshi.”

“What? No I don’t! I was just trying to say that it’s a bit too distracting. I mean we already allowed you to bring your pineapple to the meetings, but we can’t have more distractions here,” Hideyoshi explained. 

“Why are you so concerned? This doesn’t provide any distractions, right Lord Nobunaga?” Mitsuhide asked.

“No, do as you wish. But first I would like to finish this meeting,” Nobunaga answered. 

And so they continued without further interruption. After they concluded the meeting, Masamune took his coconut back to his room for some alone time. He cherished the coconut, cleaning it and cuddling it after.

[limonzu]

It's time to go back to my roots and start doodling other people's stuff

Mitsuhide's Pineapples

Mitsuhide x Pineapple; a crack fic that's not historically accurate because back in the Sengoku era, they didn't have pineapples yet T_T

I don't know what this is but enjoy.

Word Count: 483

Mitsuhide tenderly gazed at the pineapple. He hugged the pineapple, cradling it in his chest. The pineapple’s skin was rough and prickly, but Mitsuhide didn’t mind at all. Its sweet scent wafted in the air as the pineapple had ripened over the course of the week. He cherished every moment with his pineapple for his joy was not something permanent. 

Kyubei’s voice interrupted Mitsuhide, “My lord, you have visitors.”

“Is it important?” Mitsuhide asked. 

“Yes, quite urgent,” Kyubei replied.

“All right, then.” Mitsuhide put his beloved pineapple aside. Hideyoshi, Mitsunari, Nobunaga, Masamune, and even Ieyasu entered the room. “My, I didn’t expect such a large audience so suddenly.”

“Mitsuhide we came to talk,” Hideyoshi put on his stern parent voice.

“About what?” Mitsuhide chuckled.

“You’ve been really obsessed with pineapples, and we’re just here to make sure you haven’t stuck anything in a place where it doesn’t belong,” a shameless Masamune blatantly said. Hideyoshi delivered a swift slap to the back of Masamune’s head and he winced at the unexpected attack,”Ow, that kinda hurt.”

“I wouldn’t have put it like that, but we’re worried about you,” Hideyoshi said. Mitsunari looked confused. His gaze traveled between Mitsuhide and the pineapple.

“This is getting weird,” Ieyasu mumbled. 

“Mitsuhide,” Nobunaga spoke, his tone commanding and firm, ” you must relinquish that pineapple.” He pointed to the harmless pineapple next to Mitsuhide. 

“What is the meaning of this?” Mitsuhide questioned.

“An intervention,” Ieyasu replied. “Your pineapple obsession is getting out of hand.”

“Yeah, you’re wasting food,” Masamune chimed in. 

Mitsuhide held his pineapple close. He shook his head as he softly sighed, “You wouldn’t get it. The connection that my lovely pineapple and I share is something none of you could understand. He was getting emotional, not like the usual quick-witted and calculating kitsune he was best known as. 

Mitsunari spoke up, “Well, if you really love that pineapple, then I’m happy for you, Lord Mitsuhide.” His smile was bright and angelic, truly accepting of Mitsuhide and his pineapple lover.

“Huh?!” Ieyasu exclaimed. 

“As long as Lord Mistuhide is happy, we shouldn’t interfere with his happiness,” Mitsunari said. 

“Well… you do have a point,” Hideyoshi agreed after giving it some thought. “But it would be preferable if he wasn’t hoarding pineapples and wasting them because he refuses to eat his lover.” There were a bunch of pineapples gathered in the corner, like a little pineapple family.

“How about we make something with all these pineapples before they go bad?” Masamune suggested. 

“You will not lay a finger on my precious pineapples,” Mitsuhide refused. 

“Mitsuhide, surrender your pineapples,” Nobunaga commanded. Mitsuhide frowned in response. 

“Come on, Mitsuhide, give them up,” Hideyoshi encouraged. 

Eventually, Mitsuhide gave his pineapples to Masamune. Chef Masamune turned his pineapples into desserts, glazes for some meat dishes, and garnish for others. They had a pineapple feast as Mitsuhide mourned the loss of his pineapple. 

Fun fact: pineapples were brought to Japan from Taiwan in the 1920's and they were planted in Okinawa and pineapples became a major crop for Okinawa.

[limonzu]

The magical passion fruit.....

I've never had one and their innards make me uncomfortable to look at

So I had to add Jisei to save myself.

After all, Jisei and I... we are not so different...

^from Jisei's POV story

The Passion of Two Lovers

Keiji x Passion Fruit; a crack fic

I know that most people probably know the passion fruit as purple but here I'm using the yellow one because it's the one I grew up with.

Word Count: 640

@drewadoodle

Nobody knows where Keiji gets his fruits from. They appear in crates and he gives them out to soldiers. They're sour, a refreshing boost of energy. The tanginess spreads on your tongue and the muscles in your face respond by scrunching and twisting. It’s the perfect fruit for the wild child Keiji Maeda. The passion fruit. The seeds inside are edible, adding a nice crunch among the tart flesh.

Keiji ate some fruit and gave some to his pet pig, Jisei. They sat in the shade of a tree as the wind gently blew through the area. It was days like these that made the passion fruit taste even sweeter. He scooped everything out of the rind with a spoon and slurped them up like soup. 

“Ah, I guess I was lucky today. This one happens to be very sweet,” Keiji sighed in satisfaction. Jisei oinked in agreement. “Well, I should probably get back,” Keiji said to Jisei and the pig oinked once more. He picked up his little crate of the lovely passion fruits and went on his way.

Keiji plastered a smile on his face before entering the training hall. “All right boys, let’s do our best!” 

His voice was full of boisterous energy and packed a punch. All the soldiers responded with the same amount of energy and they all echoed in the training hall, ready to train their hardest. He set the crate down in an unused quiet corner, a safe place for the precious fruits. 

Everyone gave their best efforts into their practice. By the end, everyone was exhausted. Some were sprawled on the floor, others leaned against the wall, and the ones out of their minds were still standing, sparring against each other.

Keiji retrieved his fruits and shared them with the others. One soldier spoke up, “But isn’t this your favorite fruit? Are you sure you want to share it with us?” 

“Of course! Why else would I bring this here?” Keiji said in his loud, cheerful voice. It was a bonding moment for all the soldiers as they shared the fruit. Secretly, Keiji threw longing glances at the passion fruits. He wished he could be alone with his beloved fruit, but it would look too suspicious if he had that many passion fruit in his room. It was too much for one person and their pet pig to eat by themselves. 

There was a sudden commotion as the soldiers stood up for a respectful greeting of a commander. Hideyoshi. He entered the room and Keiji inwardly sighed in annoyance. 

“Keiji, I was just coming to check on you. But why is everyone eating these fruits?” Hideyoshi questioned. 

“I had a whole load of them so I decided to share some with everyone! Isn’t this great?” Keiji said. He looked around, watching everyone enjoy the passion fruit. Hideyoshi looked traumatized as he observed everyone. 

“Um, well I suppose it’s okay. There’s no conflict and everyone is getting along,” Hideyoshi said. “But why do you have this much fruit in the first place?”

“Someone gave it to me for free,” Keiji said, trying to get rid of Hideyoshi’s suspicions. But he narrowed his eyes like a mother glaring at their suspicious teenager. 

“If you say so,” Hideyoshi said. “Well, anyway, don’t forget that we have council this afternoon. Nobunaga expects you to be on time.” 

“Don’t worry, I’ll be on time,” Keiji said. 

Hideyoshi mumbled something incoherent under his breath before walking away. Keiji picked up a passion fruit and softly brushed his thumb over the bright yellow skin. While no one was looking, he allowed himself to frown just a bit. Hiding his passion for his favorite fruit was harder than he thought.

[limonzu]

I had a pickled plum once

Don't think Kenshin would approve of my reaction to it

Bonus Yoshimoto the whole time

In a Bit of a Pickle...d Plum

Kenshin x Pickled Plums (wow this is such a shocking pair); A crack fic (a woefully uninspired fic)

Kasugayama runs out of pickles and Kenshin gets extra stabby when he doesn't have his beloved plums to enjoy with his drink.

Word Count: 917 @drewadoodle

Kasugayama was bustling with energy as the warlords and vassals celebrated with a banquet. Shingen was enjoying his drink with Yukimura and Yoshimoto while Kanetsugu kept Kenshin company and Sasuke tried to go unnoticed.

But Kenshin wouldn’t let Sasuke escape. Kenshin’s stash of pickled plums were running low so he asked Sasuke to get him more. 

“My lord, I regret to inform you that there are no more pickled plums available,” Sasuke told him. Everyone in attendance went silent when the news reached their ears. It was so quiet that the crickets outside were the loudest things in the area. 

“What do you mean there’s no more pickled plums?” Kenshin narrowed his eyes. 

“There are no pickled plums ready for consumption,” Sasuke told him. Kenshin’s hand went to his sword.

“I will get some for you, my lord,” Kanetsugu spoke up. He stood up, bowed and left the room. Kenshin’s hand moved away from his sword.

By the time Kanetsugu got back, it was late into the night and most of the vessels and warlords had already gone home. Kenshin was still sitting there, sipping sake, moping. Sasuke’s expressionless face looked more traumatized than usual. Yukimura looked sick while Yoshimoto seemed interested in something else and Shingen was sitting there dozing off. 

“These are the last batch of pickled plums,” Kanetsugu said as he presented it to Kenshin.

Kenshin looked very pleased. “Perfect. I can enjoy my last cup of sake.”

The next day, Kenshin called an emergency meeting. Yukimura, Shingen, Yoshimoto, Sasuke, and Kanetsugu gathered around when Kenshin announced, “We will get pickled plums from somewhere else.”

Kanetsugu volunteered himself without hesitation. Yukimura complained, and Shingen was rambling about how he could get his spies to acquire pickled plums. Yoshimoto didn’t seem to be too interested in the pickled plum operation as he was distracted by something else. “Sasuke, go with him,” Kenshin commanded. Sasuke obeyed, bowing his head without protest. 

And so, Kanetsugu and Sasuke set out for Azuchi; they agreed on going to Azuchi because they could gather information while getting pickled plums. 

“Should we split up the work?” Sasuke asked. “You get the plums and I’ll get some info?” Kanetsugu agreed and the two went their separate ways. 

Kanetsugu wandered around the streets of Azuchi, on the lookout for pickled plums. Instead of finding pickled plums, he bumped into a pig on the street. The pig had a little passion fruit in its mouth and Kanetsugu knew exactly who the pig belonged to. And there was the pig’s owner, running to catch up. “Yo Kanetsugu, fancy meeting you here,” Keiji greeted him. His smile was big and bright as he scooped up the pig into his arms.

“Keep your voice down,” he told Keiji. “I’m here to collect merchandise.”

“What kind of merchandise?” Keiji raised a brow. 

“Pickled plums,” he answered. 

Keiji burst into boisterous laughter, “I thought it was more serious than that.”

“It’s very serious. My lord requires a wealthy supply of pickled plums.”

“Come, I’ll show you a good place for those plums,” Keiji said. 

Meanwhile in Echigo, in the depths of Kasugayama castle, Kenshin visited his personal stash of pickled plums. They were still in the process of fermentation, so they quietly sat, untouched and undisturbed. Kenshin’s lips spread into a smile that was full of endearment. “Ferment well, my little plums,” he told them as if he was tucking his children in. He closed the door and left them alone. His face immediately fell into a frown when he was reminded of the fact that they still had a few months left before they could be enjoyed. 

Everyone made sure to stay out of Kenshin’s broody mood. However, Yukimura unfortunately couldn’t escape it. 

He was dodging attacks left and right while Kenshin never broke a sweat. Shingen was watching the whole thing unfold in front of him. He shook his head and sighed, “Kenshin, I think he’s had enough.” 

“But we just got started,” Kenshin replied. 

“We started an hour ago?!” Yukimura shouted. 

“That was just the warm up,” Kenshin said. 

Yukimura groaned as he defended himself. “I hope they come back soon with those plums because I can’t do this every single day!” 

Kanetsugu was hoarding plums. He and Sasuke met up and Keiji sent them back on their way to Echigo. 

“Did you buy their entire stock?” Sasuke asked. 

“Yes,” Kanetsugu responded. 

“Oh.” Sasuke went quiet as he made some mental calculations. “We’ll have to stop frequently to let the horses rest from all that weight.” Kanetsugu just grunted in understanding and silence fell upon them. 

When they reached Kasugayama Castle, the two dismounted and immediately took the horses to rest before reporting back to Kenshin. Kanetsugu showed Kenshin the goods and a genuine expression of happiness graced his face. “Well done,” Kenshin praised. “We shall have a banquet to celebrate.”

“Oh dear,” Sasuke mumbled.

That night, Kenshin enjoyed his sake with his beloved plums; he was surrounded by jars of plums. The smile on his face was so bright that it was almost creepy. Simply going near the plums would earn a death glare from Kenshin too. But even though Kenshin was feeling extra possessive over his plums, the night ended without incident. 

“Sasuke,” he called out, “help me take these plums to my room.” He was slightly tipsy as he transported his plums. Sasuke sighed and assisted him. When they finished, Sasuke tucked Kenshin into bed and bid him and his plums good night.