#ik i dont post for a while and then i come out swinging
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phagodyke Ā· 5 months ago
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woke up feeling ruffff but took my meds and went back to bed for a while n I feel a bit better
#only slept 4 hrs yesterday so was rly hoping to get a solid nights sleep today bc i probably won't tonight....#but i didnt sigh. but my options are either to plough thru w today and make myself do this even tho i dont rly feel like it#or cancel plans and stay in and mope which will inevitably turn into self harm so rly the latter is a non option lmao#its all okay ill get into the swing of things n have a good time once im thereee#and i always knew i was gonna feel a bit like this like its an open wound for me i just need to be careful not to touch it#bc how i feel isnt based in reality its just insecurity n vulnerability n ik it can take months to fully recover from a previous episode#and part of the recovery process needs to involve facing potentially triggering situations instead of avoiding them#bc otherwise ill get increasingly worse bc its not possible to always avoid and ill be defenceless again when it does happen again etc#like its part of rebuilding my sense of self n confidence n hopefully i can eventually start to trust other ppl again n lower my guard#bc it sucks being contorted into this defensive pose all the time and i would like to allow myself to feel genuine connection w others !!#and to stop instinctively flinching and waiting for the hit im tired of my mind telling me ppl r lying + trying to hurt me when theyre not#im being a bit dramatic like i am doing a LOT better than i was a few weeks ago. n i def can handle this one#and the risk of triggering myself is much much lower anyway in this specific situation. so long as theyre not hiding shit from me again#i can think of several ways that risk could skyrocket n unexpectedly spiral out of my control n it makes it hard to breathe just imagining#but i need to believe that it wont. so if-no WHEN it doesnt then next time ill have proof that i can navigate it n i wont feel so anxious#it makes me laugh how stupid this is from an outside perspective. my brain causes me so much weird n 100% unnecessary distress#but its the only brain ive got n will always have so i need to work with it!!#anyway all that aside i genuinely am rly looking forward to this afternoon!! ive rly wanted to start doing more nice things for myself#n the fact it coincides w missing smth that could incite my rsd is kind of for the best even if it is making me anxious#i cant let my life revolve around anticipating how ppl might upset me n basing my decisions off minimising that damage#n while it would be nice to have company.. well ik its just as fun going alone bc ive done it before! n i need a reminder of that#ah im gonna turn myself in circles if i think much more. i dont need to justify anything#i hope they have a nice time and i hope i have a nice time and i hope that eventually someday we can have a nice time together instead#of separately. and i hope that someday ill feel included and wanted by other ppl and wont be posting on tumblr every time this happens LOL#this comes across like im saying i need to learn how to enjoy my own company or whatever but i prommy i already do..#what i actually need to learn is how to trust n enjoy the company of ppl i care abt without constantly being scared theyll hurt me....#but thats not happening today cuz i got other plans woooo OKAYY im gonna stop ruminating and get some chores done sjdkfh#.vent#<- well not rly a vent bc its not like im channelling feelings here im just rambling bc i have a lot on my mind. but still#this is prolly incoherent i keep putting my phone down and doing other things and then adding another thought LOL
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hesthekingofsomewhere Ā· 5 years ago
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ppl really just be out here hating women for being people huh?
if you have opinions or care about anything youre crazy, and if you dont youre boring and have no personality.
ik ppl are going to fight me on this but like, just think about how we talk about women-
"i asked her where she wanted to eat and she didn't know! God, I can't make all the decisions/women can't make up their minds/whatever"
"She wanted to eat at _______! that place is so ______, she's so controlling/picky/stubborn!"
hmmm its almost like anytime women voice their opinions theyre critisized and you only want to hear them agree with your opinions.
and on top of that- women being passionate about something and having opinions on a topic- the other reaction is "oh thats cute", a total mitigation of the woman's opinions.
Its a losing battle, either youre crazy or youre boring- people dont like it when you agree with everything they say but they also dont like it when you have youre own opinions.
its all just an excuse to hate women huh?
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not-me-simping-for-blasty Ā· 4 years ago
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Hey bb! <3
Youā€™ve quickly became my favorite bakugo writer, how you write him just feels so real to me. every time I see you post something new I get so happy!
Iā€™m seeing ya write a lot about blasty with crushes and or S/Oā€™s but not really about how he gets into a relationship so I propose to you how do you think he would realize his feelings and act upon them? If he even would lol heā€™s so stubborn and awkward with feelings I swear.
Anywho I love you and Iā€™m glad your blog is getting the attention it deserves!!
hmmm hmm hmm tysm @kits-mania for the ask, this is a good one!! also ahaha i wrote this with tiny baby UA bakugou in mind bc his comedic potential is seriously limitlessĀ 
--/--
-ok, to start, so basically, heā€™s a mess. an absolute mess.Ā 
-yes, yes, ik, weā€™d all love for him to be like, cool and smooth and suave and spit crazy game but heā€™s just not that guy. heā€™s a snarling animal at the best of times and an outright asshole every other second of the day.
-(honestly, if u asked me, the only confession you could ever get that would somehow be more disastrous than bakugouā€™s would be if u got one from tamaki. and even then, tamaki is a sweetheart so u would 100% be much more forgiving)
-but thatā€™s not the point, what is the point is that bakugou would just be so weird around u and thatā€™sĀ how he recognizes his feelings
-lmao like heā€™ll be so ridiculous with his mood swings,,, very yelling at you for breathing one second, bc even that somehow flusters him, n then the next second heā€™s recommending an extensive list of personalized training exercises (that he devised) for you and telling you to shut up if you try to thank him for it
-and heā€™ll do those things almost without thinking about it. like, heā€™s already impulsive, we been knew, but for this?? pls he absolutely cannot control himself. heā€™ll just keep accidentally doing nice things, that heā€™d neverĀ do for somebody else, and he knows this. but then he also feels like heā€™s gotta act like a dick to cover the strangeness up
-and after being rude, to save face, bakugouā€™ll be in his head totallyĀ ā€œman, iā€™m the bestĀ at this. i bet they donā€™t even know i fuckinā€™ like them!ā€ n like, yeah, heā€™s right, you 100% donā€™t, but everyone else around him does.
-very obvious to his friends how quiet he is when you come up. like, heā€™ll say shit about everyone at any given time, but when you come up in conversation?? absolute crickets from him. (this is bc bakugou wants to keep his mouth shut, to avoid suspicion obvi, but in doing so he almost doesnā€™t seem like an asshole. n when bakugou isnā€™t acting like a dick thatā€™s when you know somethings up)
-so, those two things combined,,, the mood fluctuation and uncharacteristic behavior make it pretty clear to himself that heā€™s got a crush. now, donā€™t get me wrong, heā€™s gonna be cluelessĀ on how to do anything about it, but bakugouā€™s not dumb. heā€™ll realize his feelings pretty quickly after they form
-now, for the acting upon his feelings part- whew boy.Ā  talk about an embarrassing turnout
-basically, heā€™s not gonna do shit at first. heā€™ll recognize his feelings and he doesnā€™t want to be a wimp about them, but he also kinda just wants them to go away. so heā€™ll wait it out. bc itā€™s embarrassing.
-but if that doesnā€™t work, and he really does just have one hell of a crush,,, then all heā€™ll be able to do, at first, is work up the courage to finally not be an asshole,,, using little gestures that include but are not limited to:
1.) offering you a pencil when you lose yours. alright, alright, ik, very small, but this is bakugou alright?? mans doesnā€™t give upĀ anythingĀ unless somebody tries to kill him for it and somehow manages to succeed
2.) letā€™s u copy off his school work/homework etc. obvi not all the time, but if ur in class, at the very end of a test, n he sees you looking over, bakugou will just sit there. he wonā€™t put his arm over his work. not like he would if it was anyone else but you
3.) when you ask him things, heā€™ll answer. and thereā€™s a pretty good chance he wonā€™t tell u to fuck off at the end (what a miracle)
4.) will probably try his best to avoid exploding/hitting your face during training exercises. now ofc, if u get paired up with him for sparring, rip say ur prayers, bc he will by noĀ means go easy. bakugou doesnā€™t even know the meaning of going easy. but he will keep his punches and burns away from ur face. probably also tries his best to only explode you thru the fabric of ur costume. so you donā€™t end up with burns (what a gentleman. not.)
5.) if you drop something on the ground in front of him, and heā€™s closer to it then you are, heā€™ll pick it up for u. u know, like a normal person for once.
-okay so as u can see, those things, which are very big for bakugou, are tiny. so tiny. and no other person is going to see those regular-human gestures as romantic interest bc why would they???Ā 
-see what i mean by embarrassing?? pls i love him but come onĀ man
-but anyway, heā€™ll do that for a while. like probably up to a full month tbh
-and the entire time heā€™ll just be pissed bc ur not getting it. so heā€™ll keep doing those little things more often in the hopes that youā€™ll finally understand, but ofc u dont
(sidenote: bakugou having a crush is rlly funny to me bc if any of the bakusquad asked you what you thought about him all uā€™d have to say isĀ ā€œidk? normal? heā€™s whatever?? what is this question about?ā€ bc his gestures are so small. so small that they just read like normal person behavior, and thus you have no significant opinion about him. and thatā€™s just v comedic to me bc the absolute shock on their faces when u say that? pls theyā€™re likeĀ ā€œY/N we cannot deal with either of you anymore. bakugou is not normalĀ to people??? obviously he likes you!! why do you not get it?!!!ā€)
-but n e wayz, yeah heā€™ll continue with the little shit for a while and then just impulse confess
-pls bakugou is 0-100 or not at all,, so heā€™ll be completely content in his weird behavior until one day heā€™s just fed tf up with you.
-like ur walking around with a nice outfit and your hair done up,, just 100% living normally, but for whatever reason the sight of you that dayĀ accostsĀ him. just pisses him off bc he likes you, a lot, and itā€™s embarrassing
-so he just impulse confesses right there in the heat of his anger. veryĀ ā€œjesus fuck, you really went ahead and did it now, idiot. you really fuckinā€™ piss me off. iā€™ve been busting my ass for weeksĀ now, beinā€™ fuckinā€™ niceĀ as shit to you, and youā€™ve got nothing to say? just gonna walk around like that, on purpose, and keep fuckinā€™ quiet?ā€
- n you justĀ ā€œ....?ā€Ā 
-and heā€™ll roll his eyes and huff and probably clench his hands into fists andĀ ā€œi like you. dumbass. fuckinā€™ obviously.ā€Ā 
- and suddenly you justĀ ā€œoh.ā€ bc now itā€™s very clear to you how much of a relatively ?pleasant? person he is around you and how much that contrasts with the absolute assholeĀ he is to everyone else
-pls ik everybody says heā€™s a pomeranian but like, no, seriously he is. heā€™ll pick one person to like and act normal around,, but to everyone else?? pls guard ur ankles he will bite tf out of themĀ 
so, in conclusion, bakugou with a crush is an embarrassing but oddly endearing affair. very much a guy who fumbles all the way to the finish line, but he doesnā€™t give up. not ever, and especially not when u piss him off sm (read: flusterĀ him sm) just by being yourselfĀ 
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elysianslove Ā· 4 years ago
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hey hey hey pretty bestie! I MISS TALKING TO U SO MUCH!! šŸ˜” ive been having weird mood-swings these days (turns out to be a sign that my period is coming, which is today ā€” so today is officially my first day of not fasting during ramadan) and (again) my uni life has been pretty stressing too ,, so uh those are p much my excuses in why i havent talked to you šŸ„ŗ or to put it more simply, i just didnt have anything interesting enough to share w u which why i kept on postponing our interaction, im sorry love šŸ˜žšŸ’”
i hope ur doing just fine these past days since this week is the last week of ramadan ,, talking ab the last week of ramadan im not quite sure on how i should feel ab it ,, im quite sad bc im not allowed to fast during this last week of ramadan and theres a possibility that i couldnt participate in ied prayer too but im also happy that ied is around the corner šŸ¤” but anw i hope ur last week of ramadan filled with nothing but happiness and blessings ah and also good health bc thats what matter the most <3
I ALMOST FORGOT ur latest work ab hq boysā€™ love tropes are super lovely & refreshing <3 ive reread it a couple times ā€” it helped me stay sane during my critical days ā€” so thank u btw šŸ˜© as much as enemies to lovers tropes are always thrilling and exciting, my fave would remain the friends to lovers one bc the love subtlety is just uh beautiful. i always imagine this kind of trope grows such delicate and slow-burning feelings/emotions between two ppl ā€” how slowly but surely both ur hard ass defensive walls start to crumble and fall together in such security and tranquility that have been developed through times (ok disclaimer im not trying to sound poetic or stuff i just feel like those words are the closest to describe how i feel ab it and its understandable if u find it confusing lol šŸ˜Ŗ) . and thats also why i used to like hajime so much bc the trope suits him v well ā€” i mean i still do love that man but uh matsukawa issei came to my life and i think mattsun also suits the friends to lovers trope just as well plus compared to iwa, my personalities and mattsunā€™s simply complement each other better. but beside that, i adore the soft only for their lover one too esp featuring my love, miya osamu šŸ„ŗšŸ¤ššŸ» i dont quite understand myself on why softie samu hits different to me than other softie hq characters and it also has been one of my fave fic to read <33 im looking forward to the part 2 šŸ¤©ā€¼ļø
last thing, i wanna share my mini brainrot (hope u dont mind šŸ˜™) -> bc im currently on my period i kept thinking ab mattsun, whos a bad cook (to be fair, he barely attempts in making a decent one since ur the one whos in charge for food) ā€” except for making u ur fave soup. he kept on trying to master that specific soup that helps to warm up ur tummy bc he thinks its the least thing he could do to make u feel better during ur period. sometimes when ur period cramps are really bad he would pull you on his lap and your head rest on his shoulder while he quietly blowing on the soup in the spoon before taking it into your mouth. he would tease u once in a while tho ā€” i mean it isnt mattsun without his initial teasings but this time the teasings are followed by forehead kisses and he would keep asking u if ur feeling better UGH *sobbing* *falling in love over and over again*
ā€” šŸ¬
HI BESTIE, I MISS U TOO!! aw baby :( itā€™s okay :( the hardest days to fast are always the last days anyways, so maybe itā€™s a sign!! i remember it happened to me before, you get a pre-eid šŸ’€ but anyways donā€™t be too hard on yourself for not interacting itā€™s okay!! ik u have a life outside tumblr of course, so donā€™t worry about it at all <3 just glad to have you back <3 and thank you so much for those words šŸ„ŗ i hope your last days of ramadan are filled with blessings too, and itā€™s alright if you canā€™t fast or pray, you can still do so many other things !!
ANYWAYS GANGGGG F2L SUPREMACYYY ,,, everyone interacting w that post is saying the same thing iā€™m so glad we all think alike like that. but yes so true just the pining and the angst and the desperation and wanting and longing from afar itā€™s just <3333 and oh my god now rhat i think about it f2l with issei would be so good cause,,, itā€™s so easy to be friends with him, and heā€™ll always be flirty, always tread the line between friendship and more and itā€™s just so blurry and confusing with him that itā€™s all the more angsty ugh <333 like if he flirts and you joke back but then heā€™s like ā€œno im seriousā€ and youā€™re just so taken aback. the potential with matsukawa issei and this trope oh my god. and i getchuuu, soft for your lover is only valid w miya osamu idccc
please all my anons are in sync rn w their periods šŸ˜³ wait for me šŸ˜” but havsjdjd mattsun on your period would be the perfect balance between teasing and fun, and kind and comforting. like heā€™s gonna make you feel all relaxed and safe and calm by lightly teasing and joking with you with his warm hand on your tummy easing the pain :( probably tickles you if youā€™re ticklish tho šŸ’”šŸ’”šŸ’”
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bloojayoolie Ā· 7 years ago
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Af, Anime, and Apparently: , Okay Ibl, story ame when I wss younger, had this Irish friend who pred our school when w as like 17, Dude ded recently nd hereäøthe ballad of the merveeus bsstard be average as fuck 17 year old Bribong Some foreign guy has just joined, his family just moved here city called Dery in Mgved here with his dad and his lite sister, his mum died when he was younger He gets put in my class and ends up stting nest to me This is howl met Eigh-Beers Mgee the all him Call him a hippo because of his fucking industrial size frant teeth and his big flucking lps Greg uses his adism to get out of doing and saying whatever the fuck he wants noing EB wth she lke Greg has his desk very paricularly arranged, pens on one side in a straight ine pencis on the other Dude is OCD as fuck with his pencilcase and shit Goes nuts i anything gets moved, so this desk is sightly apart from everyone elses We all get in shit twe fuck with him an purpose, We ought to know better The sutistic hippo keeps trying to get a reaction out of EB the whole class All af a sudden EB just casualy raises a foot and pushes the Hppo's desk right the fuck over Teacher hurries oer and trying to explan to EB atma Gregs autism while Greg teaks the tack G in his chair, breathing reawy ss thoug gh nong bd sheerč¾tstie resentment EB looks at Greg and betsthe teacher "Oh sorry, wedant have Wid bump with more nenhinbeland' h on EB's third day at our school He's a pretty cool guyikes the ģ‘ˆme vidya and movies as me and is a big fan of Rugby, was captan of his team back iieland ell hem the school has s rughy searn he says EB goes to check it out, starts off on the lower team because hes think theyire ston of kind of fast runners gets recks fucking everyone that next hal f hel take him Jumps on him, grabs him by the neck to pull him down and iterally rolls on him ike a fucking rolling pn -EB didniteven have the bal What the fook you playin at son I didnt even have the ball, do you even know how to fookin play the game lad EB grins You know over in Ireland you have to be fit to play sports, the fatties get leit on the sideline EB grabs his amn and tosses him to the ground dude twists his anke or something and starts twitching and squeaking lke a baby elephant with parkinsons EB gets put on top team Anonymous (D wHTHOgC) 03 19/14(Wedj20 28 25 UTC-5 No 538041137 Reple 41T months without inc dont give long as youre cool to him dents aside from a few close cals with Greg the Mildly Autistic Hppo e pretty close Apparently ć…² Ireland they don't have gangs they have paramitanes fighting between whether Northern lreland ts Britsh or hsh >He plays 4down a kal, bd ican tell some shit mu have Pagpened because he always changes the subject when gets closĀ·tohame Edgy fapgot Luke comes back to school Luke hangs around with a pack of riggers who are all apparenty in a gang, he les to pretend he's part of this "gang" and carries this fucking Stanky e around that he panted red and bue for some reason aOne day at lunch Like corries up to EBied o ofnotere starts askrig his datisalcoholc Nope aound Tm guessin your mam had a far lew belore you were born though mate Well tuck Ind wanna sift speI had to sht out a dat bastardlke yourset. Jog on ćƒ³"You win t)4ck with the wrong person t y inst, boy?" EB starts laughing, IHeraly loses his sht at the ste of this Itle fagpot in a trenchc oat with a stanley knfe and actualy presses EB grabs his wrist, takes the fabled blade from the hands of the chosen one tosses t over a fence and punches him straight in the face We're out geting beer, Tm with a 7/10 GT that Ive had a crush on for tucking months Her and EB get along realy wel, athough I sort of think she only hung out with us because EB did That right when we're all drunk, me and QT end up fucking Leaving out my side because this is the ballad of Eght Beer, not me Spend ages taking with QT,estabĒshthat shĆØ apparenty seat, ikes me back EB heads up to bed, I stay down with the other guys to watch TV, QT was askeep when 1 came down QT comes running do wwith a towel round her, soaking wet, and rung out the ont door Apparently EB sleeps naked, not surpnised since Ive found him naked before after a night of drinking Says she came on to himeven ater all he shit she said aLaughģˆØ and says he took aprt to bed with hm,awas cn e tablo and when she ed onwth him he lossed all over her Threw her clothes out the wendow into the rain and told her to go and fetch Two weeks later he takes me to a pub and hooks me up with a 910 Anonymous (TDwHT HOC) 03/1914(Wed 20.43 59 UTC-5 No 538044014 Raps.4380408044772 332420 EB and me are total bros after being fnends for a few years ź°€%aving hm as a best friend is Ike havngtose nasty trainers as a kid Shit get pretty he avy >Him and Eę±Øwere close, mostly because EB would buy him vidya and act super interested in the anime sht he lied because nobody else other than me would loses his har chermo aGotovst him, EBisgung me there >He thinks rs awesome get our photo taken together witout any har EB lets him draw all kinds of dumb sh on his bad head, lets him draw a dumb moustache on him o Spend ages just dicking a >Son of a bitch luke who R is, Dukey the Rookie is across the bar in the same tucking trenchcoat he wore back at school >EB says hi chats away to him lbe nothing ever happened >We head home and EB spend the night sitting up with me playing Batlefront on my old P52 and drinking, just trying to cheer me up me every time Sorry for that 2sad4me post, but iti make sense later Anonymous (IO woitth%) 05/19/14(Wed)20 52 46 UTC-5 No 530045357 Reeses ģ”Œ38amsrme esaaa Lving together in a let with some chick and her boyfriend The one song I remember is "Uncle Tommy by The Rumjacks, because it played when sht went down EB told them that he "ain't lookin any trouble lads, have a beer and forget that tripe for the night aye? 4 of them jump on him, start beating the shit out of him -l tackle one of them to try help him, get the fuck beaten out of me but fuck that it's goddamn E8 in there EB broke the dudes fucking am He gets up, bleeding out of every pore in his beaunful iwish body Bouncing around with his fists up, Ieraly looks ike he could fly around the room he's bouncing that much The skinheads keep going for him but back off every time aher he swings, it looks lke he could knock a building down with that sh Babbling some incoherent shit in lrish rage, nobody understands the words but everyone understands the meaning pack up there sht ike a scene from a fucking move Eight tucking beersl You splied eight of me fucking beers you hairless tuckin mongrels Eight beers lad, eight fucking beers What's the fucking craic there lke Anonymous (D: wHTiHOgC) 031914(Wed]21:6 02 UTC-5 No. 538047326 EB sgoing back to Ireland to vist his nan, she's real sick źø°we lar dr, Befast-thritrs the captal of the oth but not of Ireland ckhow t wori ed EB never eaty expla edit, 5ad you wont understand the bullsh politics unless you grew up there go 1o vist his nan with EB' Sweetest tucking old lady ever, says that EB was always a rough lad but awk he'd never hurt a sour greedy fucker This woman is clearly the most infuenial famly member in the Eight Beer famly EE shows me round Derry, tels me about how 5pIt relgusy and shows methes bg ass wall cood place Takes me to Belast agan and shows methe pace wherethe ttanc was bu -we end up going to place caled The Crown Bar Ger pretty drunk, or Tpped as EB calls it Walked around Belfast for a bt, he tells me about the history of some stuf Ā»Spend a few nights there, have a fucking blast but decide to head home don't wanna be an inrusion on the whole nan stustion Lad you're practicaly a part of the famly Anonymous D wH7HOQC) 03/19/14Wd21 18 48 UTC-5 No 538040230 Getting close to the end now Shits hard to wrte, I miss hat fucker Life is prety uneventful for a wle pparentty some Kiddy Fiddler called Wilm Whight fucked EB when totally agan family home a load of sht, fucks 2EB spends all nut there next to her, nearly gets wolent when staff ask harto leave so doctors can sort some ė‹ø官out calm him down and we wat r, hosptzd for brig bme B's Sister gets beter, but is pretty fucked for life Never taks never leaves the house she's pretty much a goddarmn vegetable EB spends all of his time off work with her, never comes out anymore, just sts in with her. We sometimes come ound and drink with him but he refuses to leave the house -One night while he's sieeping, EB's fucked up sister C's faul, that's pretty much the main subject of t. I don't get why she'd need to say that but whabever Tels me he waan't that close with his family back home his dad is fucked up with grief and everythings just a mess ie doesn't want to go home because he has nothng there other than remnders, but doesn't want to stay here because of what has pened Does his best to be the usual bi9dck coolguy that he always was, puts on a brave face but f you c h him on his own he's luckn9 merable ite gets in ź°  few fights when we're ot dmkrg ry one who gnestmamy 5hvt gets m edistety fucking amidated none ofths ads everyone on" that he used to do s fighting back tears already guessed, but he starts teling me about how he blames himseffor what ź±°had pened to his sis have tucking known better >Lterally carrot change his mid anthis shit, looks like he has himse#1uly convinced th this is his taut we talk about old imes laugh a be things actualy seem back to normal for whie Ainight mabe. Let's have one for old tme's sake, ae? Hie eventualily leaves, but before he goes he tells me that 'You've been a good mate from day one mate. Honestly out on a limb rd do fuckin' anything for ya Take t easy lad speti ong tme EB doesn't reply to teats or Cutign place doeant answer B tucking hung himsel is fanly tatoo many things that I don't need thanked every tme fucker
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survivormuxloe Ā· 6 years ago
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Episode #12:Ā ā€œif they were smart, they would take me out tonight.ā€ - David
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Man, things are not looking good at all for me and my alliance, LOL, sweet lord. Jones was blindsided at tribal, and now if I don't win out these immunity challenges, I'm definitely gonna go home.
Winning 2 in a row is a feat in itself, now I'm going for 3. With a time of 7:58, I feel pretty good about it. The key is to not get ahead of yourself and take your time. People go too damn fast in these endurance challenges and manage to mess up, I'm hoping that's the case again this time, LOL.
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so...! POST TRIBAL JONES WENT HOME 4-3-1 HALLELUYAH LOLLL LIKE THE GODFATHER IS GONE!!! rhys legit gave me tobi and ryan a fucking heart attack bc if he selfed it would have been 3-3-1-1 and ryan was gonna use his idol on tobi.. i have to laugh lol but ya like uhm.
its rly weird to be in this position. where i feel insanely comfortable. iā€™m the only person left with 0 votes to my name, me and tobi are the only people to vote 100% in majority throughout this game. :))
and itā€™s even better bc.. tobi and ryan both think iā€™m their #1ā€™s. and i can act the fool bc iā€™m the ONLY canute left vs 3 mercia 2.0 and 3 sweyn 2.0 hehe...
its super weird i dont usually have good positioning but i feel as if the only way iā€™ll ever leave is an idol play which i think me and ryan have the only ones :)
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I BEAT THE CURSE OF EIGHT. But Jones got voted out. So itā€™s a win/lose situation. She was determined on helping me get past eighth and itā€™s upsetting. But I gotta keep moving forward and do my best. Block Party was very tedious and I donā€™t know whatā€™s considered a ā€œgood scoreā€ for this challenge but I completed it in 7 minutes which I think is pretty good.
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so im just gunna be a psychic and hope this comes into fruitation or whatever the word is...
OK SO THIS VOTE GET OUT DAVID.. easy 4-3 lol
next vote.. bait tobi mo and ahrre into voting ryan, tell ryan to idol, we pref get ahrre out if possible..
then i PREF WIN F5 IMMUNITY AND BAIT all of them into votign tobi and i idol tobi... but if i dont win immunity im gunna prob use it on myself and be a selfish cunt lol
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Just kidding it took me 11 minutes I donā€™t think Iā€™m winning this
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So last tribal was interesting. In theory my plan didnt change anything, however it couldve stopped a tie vote. Jones was close to Ahrre and Mo (maybe David?!). So she couldve easily chose to vote Ryan and sway them on board. My plan stopped this happening as she had no idea they were voting for Tobi.
Now I feel like I am still in a power position. I am inbetween Tobi, Ryan, Scott and Mo, Ahrre and David. I have to assess my options. I did lie to Mo, and Ahrre. So they may want to make a move against me. Where as Tobi, Scott and Ryan are the more safe trio but also more dangerous in that I wouldnt be able to beat one of them in the end.
Someone has idols too. So ANYTHING could happen. I need them to get burnt out soon. I CANT have a possibility of 4 IDOLS at final 5. Dani, Felix and Jones were all blindsided, so there may be a chance some idols laid there. However the merge one is likely still here. It was gone before jones left, and might be gone still. Meaning the idol is with someone else or wasnt re hidden.
My main goal in this round is to keep votes off me, get an idol possibly used and stay low. I didnt make a massivly obvious move, so my visiablity may still be low. I dont need a huge threat level, it makes getting to the end 100x harder.
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Tobi snapped in immunity and tg he did bc David is finally vulnerable again <3 honestly it should be an easy vote considering ik our 4 wants David out bc he's so strong, and I doubt anyone else has an idol since me and Scott have 2.... so wigggg smooth sailing? i ain't gonna settle into comfortability tho bc that's never good
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Ok so now I need to think about my end game. The only two people Iā€™m not comfortable sitting next to FTC are Ryan and David. Ryan has been swerving eliminations and has gotten rid of several big threats. David is a comp beast and is also responsible for some big moves. So now you might be thinking, Mo? Whatā€™re you going to do? Lemme tell ya Barb. So my plan AT the moment. Is 7. David 6. Ahrre or Rhys 5. Ahrre or Rhys 4. Ryan And then final three will be Scott, Tobi and myself.
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Winning immunity at this stage feels sooooooo damn good like especially for this round, this is the first time david has been open on the table after his immunity... and i feel like this is the round where advantages from the other side will be played and im glad im not vulnerable to whatever shit they throw at us... so like from a gameplay standpoint, me and scott have one of the best games currently (i think) with scott edging me slightly since he hasnt got any votes yet, but we're working together really well and like i feel like i can talk game to him really well... so the plan is that we take out david this round, we round up mo (idk about ahrre) for next vote and blindside ryan, and then from there we take out ahrre, and then me and him are in f4 with two goats. He wants to go to f3 with me while taking one goat (or so he says he does) but im gonna start making moves on scott at f4, if i can take out scott at f4 that leaves me a huge opening to take the game all the way till the end... but maybe i'm thinking too far ahead
Lowkey tho like... I kinda want ahrre out over david at this point... i feel like ahrre has built some sort of barrier in our relationship for no reason. like i've shown huuuge interest in working with him in the past, but he's just gone against me and even voted me last tribal in SPITE of me??? like??? everything he's done has landed him in the minority LMFAOOOOOOO LIKE get your head out of your ass and realize that i actually want to work with you!!! and like to get ryan out at f6 we're gonna need numbers and im not sure how comfortable i am with depending on mo to flip with us, the problem with telling ahrre is that hes soooo unpredictable like, he might just go and tell ryan everything me and scott are doing and then bam there goes everything... i understand wanting david out now since he's an immunity threat but thinking about all Ā the blindsides I need to pull off like... I wanna keep david but I don't have numbers to keep him so I'll just have to bite the bullet on this one
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So!! i lost challenge. again. lol xd
missus david and his ragtag bunch of misfits who dk how to Not piss everyone off are now deciding to vote me after unsuccessfully voting everyone else. (: BC THATS GUNNA WORK OUT FOR THEM.
like bitch.. work w/ the majority. they arent even TRYING. its lowkey kinda sad but its their own faults they put themselves in this position...
the tea is even tho i have my idol im only playing it @ f6/f5 OR if david idols. like. tobi/ryan def wont vote me and rhys will just follow ryan i think NNNN
wisj me luck x
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Fuck. I have a really tough decision to make. Iā€™d like to say Iā€™m the swing vote but I donā€™t actually know 100%. I can choose to vote with David, Rhys and Ahrre or Ryan, Scott and Tobi. My main concern with this vote as a whole is jury management because I donā€™t want someone to leave unhappy with me but thatā€™s really tough to do. I said previously my two concerns are David and Ryan when it comes to who I donā€™t wanna be sitting next to at FTC. A final four with David is scary because heā€™s a comp beast. A final four with Ryan is scary because he is super close with Scott and Tobi. This is a headache.
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Well so last vote was funky dunky. So rhys sticked with the majority because he considered Jones to be a bigger threat than Tobi due to her connections.... Then the vote comes around and literally everyone lied to Jones about the vote LMAO.
So me mo and david followed thru with the tobi vote but it was to no avail, mainly because rhys not only flipped but he let him know I was gunning for him. Meanwhile the rest convicted Jones to vote me, probably by telling her some lie about how I was after her. While they all voted for her.
So there goes Jones and my no votes streak with her RIP. So after all of that I decided it was time for me to try and win imunity and while I was close Tobi just edged me the fecker.
So now we have an immune tobi and depend on rhys to flip for real this time. I hope he realizes that if he doesn't then everything is fucked but now it doesn't even depend on him. Since it's between Ryan and Scott and it's f7 the chances of an idol being played are high.
David is worried it might be him they're going after but idk anything could happen.
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hmm so I've been busy today and haven't been talking with everyone. but i believe the tiffany alliance is still on the same page of voting David. i heard from Scott that the other 3 are voting him and they think Rhys is voting with them so that's interesting. i'm defintiely feeling safe, and i feel like Scott isn't going anywhere either so yayy final 6 here we go. I also talked with Scott about taking out Tobi sometime before final 3 because he's definitely a big jury threat, and he can definitely win immunities so if we get a chance to take him out we might hop on that. A final 3 of me/Scott/Rhys sounds pretty ideal and i think me or Scott would take home the win whew
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david got another thing coming if he thinks he can idol me out... thats tea lol :)
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So I lost the challenge yesterday...and yet I'm hearing that I'm not getting any votes tonight o.O which I don't believe for one second, cuz if they were smart, they would take me out tonight.
As I'm hearing...me, Mo, Ahrre and Rhys are gonna be voting for Scott, and Ryan, Scott and Tobi are voting Ahrre...because they think that I have the idol, LMFAOOO. WHICH IS TOO FUNNY OMG. I WISH I HAD THAT FUCKING IDOL, LOL.
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Okay, so one side thinks Scott is going, One side thinks David is going. Meanwhile im in the middle lieing to half the tribe trying to stop an idol getting played to save my closest ally. Yeet.
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Ok so according to rhys they're gonna be voting me since they're worried about david having an idol. But maybe that's just rhys playing the long con. Either way there's a sizeable chance I could be going home this week but hey third time's the charm amarite maybe this blindside will work once in for fucking all. Anyhow let's see how this thing goes.
David is voted out 4-3.
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