#ik a lot of blogs & even myself like we all do it??

[thedilfdiaries]

get to know your moots

ty for the tags loves <3 @probablyreadinsmut @itwasntimethatdidit40 @ace-turned-confused @thundermartini @kedsandtubesocks and @reddedmiller

what's the origin of your blog title?: me being an uncreative basic bitch. but it's fine we are suffering through the consequences of the most uncreative username of all time.

OTP(s) + shipname: me, joel miller AND javier pena <3

favorite color: black and mint green (yes ik its very specific idk really what to say I even have a tattoo that is partially this color lol)

favorite game: rdr2, dreamlight valley, tlou, bg3, mariooooo, zelda, assasins creed

song stuck in your head: hold the line - toto and whatever is on my fic playlist

weirdest habit/trait?: probably a lot but the most annoying as a lot of us have mentioned is assuming no one really likes me. but also doing that thing where you start a task and then see something else that has to be done so by the time you have finished you've begun 50 other tasks

hobbies: video games, reading, writing stories, poems and music, pretending I can bake cute aesthetic things I find on Instagram reels, calligraphy, collecting sea glass and sea shells.

if you work, what's your profession? i worked on a cow farm

if you could have any job you wish what would it be? a sugar baby, someone who lives on a beach, but really anything in music bts or in front or a psychologist but instead I went to school two times for things I did not end up staying with haaaaaa

something you're good at: giving you compliments until you tell me to stfu

something you're bad at: i like this answer so same -> putting myself first, also as it's been said a few times socializing, and flirting

something you love: documentaries ommmg jdkfdakjf <3 <3, downtime when I can have it, also I always forget how much I love the sun until this time of year, hearing a favorite song you haven't heard in a long time, watching stuff with people whether its movies or youtube videos or shows

something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: video games, music, joel miller, the octopus lifecycle, Shakespeare, fun bts facts of my favorite movies and tv shows (I could spend days upon days looking up facts about how movies and shows are made and the little details in each of my favorite movies and shows)

something you hate: when its too hot or too cold, when I do that thing and don't buy snacks to be "healthy" and then wish I had a snack and math.

something you collect: i was collecting miniatures until they all got lost in a move, sea shells, coca cola memrobilia, Marilyn Monroe memorabilia, coral, anything vintage, trauma, and wips

something you forget: what don't I forget

what's your love language?: acts of service, words of affirmation, physical touch

favorite movie/show: beauty and the beast, most keanu reeves movies as I've been binging them lately, lotr, how to lose a guy in 10 days, donnie darko,

favorite food: potatoes any day, any way, any form

favorite animal: cows, platypus', whales and dolphins

what were you like as a child? the quiet kid who was basically a mute because anxiety sucks and being perceived is frightening - lemme just fade into the floor

favorite subject at school? psychology, english because we could read Shakespeare and really cool books, science, music class, history, french, home ec, woodshop

least favorite subject? math and phys ed cause ya girl ain't a runner but yet they're all like "ohh its not that hard" but bro you're not even doing it

what's your best character trait? why are these questions so hard though? like idk my ability to make people feel comfortable?? i feel weird answering this lol

what's your worst character trait? i guess my inability to put myself first still and my dad jokes and sometimes I get quiet because I have a huge fear of rejection or abandonment

if you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be? that I was on vacation instead of driving around for hours today or sleeping more that'd be great

if you could travel in time who would you like to meet? Beethoven, Shakespeare, my grandparents, Marilyn Monroe, John Lennon, Frida Kahlo, idkkkk

recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love!): there's so many this is rude asking for one so I'll give you two series. recently I read late night texts by @jolapeno and the wolf you feed by @arcanefox207 these series changed my brain chemistry for the best. I could scream on every rooftop in the world about these to every person in the world like please READ THEM!!!

npt: @arcanefox207 @gothcsz @syd-djarin @sunshinehaze1 @sunshineispunk @milla-frenchy @aurorawritestoescape @604to647 @myownwholewildworld @evolnoomym @slimybeth69 @almostfoxglove @lotusbxtch @baronessvonglitter me smooching you all through the phone <3 <3 <3 cause you all deserve every ounce of love and joy in the whole world

[lowkeyrobin]

could you write a walker x transmasc!reader oneshot? if not, that is fine aswell! - 🗡️

of course I could!! just beware any random shit because I don't know much about being transmasc and I did a lot of research on reddit and tiktok for this for like mannerisms ans shit ; thanks for requesting and I hope you enjoy! ; for any regulars on my blog, ik I've enforced the gn reader only thing but I updated my rules list, where I'll only do trans masc/fem readers on request. that doesn't mean request a thing and add one of those solely for a set of he/him or she/her pronouns though. ; post writing robin and this was actually so fun to write LMAO I hope you like this even tho it's so short

WALKER SCOBELL ; the boys

summary ; youre transmasc and properly come out to walker and co + some stupid shit for two parts

warnings ; language

disclaimers ; idk shit about awards shows + imagine middle school auditorium seats for the first part

word count ; 723

masterlist

You, Aryan, Walker, and Leah sit in the audience at the 2025 Emmy Awards, chatting before the cameras turned on to watch the proper show begin. You and Walker sit together, with Aryan and Leah right behind you. The thick, tan, plastic chairs were going to do a number on your ass later. For a million-dollar award show you'd think they would upgrade the seat situation a little bit.

Leah and Aryan sit forward in their seats, holding a conversation with you and Walker, both turned around in yours.

"No, and like, you will not be calling me that, thank you!" You laugh and smile, "If you get your grimy hands on my legal name I will actually throw myself away. I am a man!"

"Wait, what?" Walker questions, eyebrows furrowed. "Legal name?"

"I changed my name" You clarify. "Cause like..." You look yourself up and down, hands following your gaze. "Y'know?"

Walker blinks, pushing his blonde curls away from his face. "Wait... you're trans?"

You nod, a playful yet unbelievable smile on your face. "How did you not know?"

"Even I knew" Leah comments, glancing at Aryan, who nods in agreement.

"I thought it was kinda obvious." You chuckle, seeing his surprised reaction. "I had to keep correcting people about my name like, a million times"

"I never knew you had another name? I thought it was always Y/n!"

"This is going on my story"

"Which one?"

"The Boys"

Walker smiles, his right arm slung over your shoulders as he watches you caption and post the picture you'd just taken with him on your public Snapchat story. It was titled The Boys, meant for you and all your close friends.

He was glad to see that you considered him one of your close friends, but also on such a deep level, though it was just a title to you. He saw the deeper meaning that you didn't. Like an over analyzing reader to a writer. He was happy you also considered yourself a boy, that you could happily parade that around and feel comfortable with your identity. He truly couldn't be more proud to see you happy and smiling in this moment.

You look back up at him, a cheesy smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

"What's that look for?" You ask, a little confused.

"Nothing" He replies, patting your right shoulder blade as he moves his arm around a bit. "We should definitely make a playlist and put it on your story for people to listen to" He suggests with a slight shrug.

"For what?" You ask again, a little puzzled as to where this was going."

"Just cause"

"Okay, Mr.-Won't-Explain-Shit-Scobell"

"You just went on a five minute tangent trying to avoid the word homophobia"

"I was testing the waters with your gaydar, cause apparently it was broken the first time"

"I don't have a gaydar! I'm just, like, here! I'm just a guy"

"Look at this handsome man! Dude, wear purple more, I'm so serious"

"Okay, I see you, Y/n!"

"Fix your tie!"

"I'm trying, I'm still learning! I didn't have this chapter of boyhood"

"Here-" The blonde mumbles, reaching forward to fix your black tie.

You tilt your chin up, giving him easy access to the cloth wrapped around your neck. Leah and Aryan watch, smug looks on their faces.

You send them a glare, trying not to alert Walker to it. He quickly reties your tie, sending you a thumbs up as he backs away. You quickly thank him, a warmth heating up your cheeks, physically unnoticeable.

"Walker, you look like a divorce lawyer." You comment, stuffing your hands in your purple pockets.

The blonde dramatically scoffs, a hand rested on his heart. "You're so mean to me! You're not welcome to the next boys sleepover"

"I don't wanna be a part of that dorky shit anyways"

"Okay, meanie"

"What are you, twelve?"

"...Did you just attempt to quote me?"

You shrug with a side nod.

Leah speaks for you, "Yeah, he did"

"How do you know?"

"He told us that he was gonna try and quote you at least once today" She chuckles.

The three look back at you, lining your jawline with your finger, clearly sucking up your tongue.

"Dude, stop mewing, we have to go out there in like, a minute"

[truly-a-snitch]

helloo just found this blog and love ur work <3

it says requests r open but I don't trust myself and so if they are, can I request pegging w dazai and chuuya (separate ofc) w a dom reader (idk why I'm specifying is it even possible to make a sub reader peg 💀💀)

im just a woman w simple needs ik it's boring 😔👊

never fear anon i too need to peg dazai and chuuya this is not boring at all. youre gonna ravish these losers

also yes it is possible for a sub to be doing the pegging !! dom/sub is just about whos in charge/who has power in any given encounter, not whos topping/bottoming. (see: succubus reader/dazai drabble i did, dazai was on top but subbing) thank you for specifying because i probably wouldve made this dom chuuya if u hadnt lol

warnings/tags: gn reader !!, can be read as strap or dick, praise w both, hair pulling w dazai, body worship sorta w dazai, brat!chuuya, youre a lil mean to chuuya (sexual style), overstim w chuuya, pet names used: darling, dearest, thing (for dazai); hon, toy (for chuuya)

---

Dazai

He was so easy to please when you actually managed to get him bent over something- usually a counter in your kitchen, though this time you had actually made it to the bedroom before bending him over. All it took was a few nice words and well-placed kisses, and he unraveled underneath you. Today seemed to be no exception.

"Ah, fuck," Osamu whined when you thrusted into him particularly harshly, melting into the sheets.

"Shh, I know, darling," you teased, admiring the way he squirmed under you, barely able to hold himself up anymore. You had covered him with hickies so dark you wondered for a moment how long they would take to fade. (A week? Two?) "Such a good little thing for me, taking me so well. There we go, dearest."

He was shaking already. As was expected. The poor darling was incredibly touchstarved, it only made sense he'd be so sensitive.

"Aw, you gonna cum? Poor thing," you said, fingers finding his hair and carding gently through, then yanking his head back harshly and earning a whimper at the movement. His mouth opened to try and formulate a reply, but he fell into moans again instead at a harsh thrust on your part. His arms gave out under him, and he melted into the sheets all over again.

"Fuck," he hissed. If you didn't know him better you'd assume you had hurt him. "Fuck, 'm close."

You cooed gently when he let out a moan that hitched up into a whimper, somehow falling even more pliant under you. You leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to his neck, and he shivered.

"Go ahead and cum whenever, darling," you said, and only a moment later he let out a broken groan as he came. You gently worked him through it, only pulling out when he was twitching from the aftershocks of orgasm and his fingers scrambled for hold in the sheets, as if he wanted to anchor himself to something. As if he feared you'd overstimulate him.

(You weren't above that, so he was definitely right to be worried, but you would just save that for next time.)

Chuuya

Chuuya talks a lot of shit for a man who so easily melts under you. He likes to tease you, get you all riled up while he's protected by the veil of being out in public. Always keeps it up until you get back to your shared apartment where- if he's teased you enough- he usually gets dragged to the bedroom by the collar of his shirt. (Or, on days you feel like meticulously unwinding him and teasing him right back, a palm pressed firmly to his lower back.)

Like right now.

Because, as usual, he had gone and teased you all day. It had worsened during dinner, with him purposely using phrases and pet names and the like, ones that he knew got your mind wandering. Ones he knew he'd deal with the consequences of the moment you got home.

And he was pinned beneath you right now, one arm twisted almost painfully behind his back and the other struggling to hold himself up.

He let out a whine as he tried to rock his hips back into yours.

"Hm? What's that, hon?" you asked, gripping his arm a bit tighter, twisting it a bit farther- and his hips stilled again. He breathed in pointedly, and a shiver visibly ran up his spine. "Feels good, I take it?"

"You are so mean," he muttered, voice shaky. Almost breaking. It was as if his resolve was about to give in on itself, about to collapse under its own weight.

"I know, how dare I give my darling toy what he's been begging for all night," you teased. "Don't think I didn't see what you were doing at dinner, hon. Those bedroom eyes are going to be the death of me one of these days."

He shivered again, and the tension began to melt out of his frame. You recognized this. He was close.

"Aw, hon, you gonna cum?" you teased, pace relentless. He nodded and let out a low moan. "Already? I've hardly had my fun yet."

Chuuya shivered again, let out a sharp whine, and a moment later he was spilling over. The tension in his body completely evaporated, and a moment later he was biting back an overstimulated sob as you kept going.

"Fuck, wait, it hurts," he said, voice shakily. "Slow down."

"Hm?" you hummed, then pretended to contemplate. "No, hon, I don't think so. You wanted me so badly earlier, whispering the dirtiest things in my ear on the train. You could hardly contain yourself. It'd be downright cruel of me to stop now."

[liggy-not-potter]

hello :3 i’m liggy, i’m 15 (a minor, don’t be creepy), ace and possibly somewhere on the aro spectrum.

hobbies

i’m in a lot of fandoms, so i probably can’t list them all here. harry potter, both canon era and marauders (fuck jkr) and the fanfic i’m writing where harry has a sister no one knew abt. (posting that on ao3). legendborn, percy jackson (i’m not done with it so no spoilers please), mcu, the owl house, gravity falls, amphibia

i write songs and poetry, i play piano, ukulele, violin and guitar i like drawing but i’m not good at it

dni the usual. if you discriminate against any minorities or hate people solely because of a group they belong to (religion/lack thereof, race, sexuality, gender orientation)(unless it’s stuff like terfs, neo-nazis and such bullshit if it’s a group that causes harm intentionally you’re right to hate them)

random shit about liggy

i have adhd and most likely a hint of something else neurodivergent (i think it’s the tism). i’m a mess, but at least i’m not boring i’m a minor so don’t be creepy, i don’t care abt interacting with adults as long as you aren’t being a creep i refer to myself in the third person sometimes, get the fuck over it gryffindor - enfp

the rats (my moots) @jamespotterbbg — kay — my first moot, chaotic, mentally ill as the rest of this site, is the reason i’ve even interacted with half of these people @garden-of-runar — runaround — talented poet, fellow defender of bagels, absolutely and entirely concerning, you’ll never know their next move @melonhead10 — wife of mine — silly little rat, one of the only people on here i know irl, rarely online bc strict parents, if she is online it’s to look at shiny duo and tangled the series @eef-stars — british ethan — the gay dad friend of this whole hellsite. king of deactivating and coming back out of nowhere. happily in love with @kawaiibarty @kawaiibarty — james the baked bean — short, gay and irresponsible. has too many doggies but we don’t care bc doggies are great. changes his url every two seconds. in love with @eef-stars @tequilaqueen — bea — possibly an alcoholic, you’ll never know. hates bagels and commits war crimes. @crowleys-mortalcounterpart — brie — my child. genderfluid lesbian variant of remus lupin. some unknown flavor of neurodivergent. i also know them irl. @0urazz — satan — brie’s sister and my daughter. chaos incarnate, addicted to regretevator and some other random ass roblox games. one step away from being gen alpha. the attention span and brain capacity of a grain of rice. violently affectionate. ik her irl as well @thejudeduarte — jude — cruel prince and legendborn fan. really nice and sometimes chaotic. @iamaladder — stepladder (ethan’s version) — chaotic aarakocra boi, old crusty man (in other words a year older than me) another person i know irl @thestrawberryapologist — mari — purchaser of jams, very goofy, does silly sitcom rp with me, recently returned to tumblr after disappearing on us

interactions

blow up my ask box, tag me on stuff, and message me all you want. i love being on here and talking to people and making friends <3

my pinterest poetry side blog: @liggy-attempts-poetry vent/safe space side blog: @liggers-tries ask game: here ask game 2: here

my tags: liggy rambles: all my random ass posts liggy found an ask: i answer asks liggy attempts to sing: i sing liggy attempts poetry: my (likely reblogged from side-blog) poetry nonsense liggy special: i most likely did something fucking stupid jam murder sitcom: a silly sitcom thing i do with mari to the queue you go motherfucker: my queued posts, likely because i’m out of town. liggy rambles in the tags: i rant to everyone and no one in the tags

[olderthannetfic]

I don’t know if it's appropriate on this blog but I'm just going for it. How do people make friends in fandom? How do you all manage it? I've been bouncing from fandom to fandom for more than 15 years and have been mostly lurking for the better part of those years. It has been very hard to find friends just in general because of my shyness and all this antiship/proship discourse is making it even harder to even consider putting myself out there. Everyone just seems insufferable. Even the ship and let ship crowd.

A thing I've noticed is that while the proship spaces have better attitudes towards fiction/fandom/fanfic in general there exists this weird hate boner about people with canon ships (in my personal experience, just last week I stumbled on a tweet from a self identified proship account telling people that they shouldn't read fanfic of their blorbos because they are canonically together which made me go huh) and there exists this strange superiority complex, a "you're not enlightened like me" attitude (it's very strange and especially prominent among people who identify as proship and ship the big m/m ship in fandoms of material catered towards male audiences, ik this because I was guilty of this superiority too at one point). Honestly, this "enlightenment", the hypocrisy of preaching ship and let ship but only the way I deem correct (last week I saw a big a proship account shade shippers of a specific rival ship right under their thread about how we shouldn't generalize and I think I lost brain cells) and condescending attitude of "I am not boring like you" and "You're doing fandom wrong" is one of the reasons that has turned me off those spaces more and more. I've noticed it once and can't unsee it because it all gives off this mean girl (gender neutral) energy and puts me off interacting.

On the other hand a lot of the ship and let ship spaces that prefer the canon ships tend to be very anti adjacent even if they actually practice ship and let ship (screaming and crying about sexualization of minors, throwing out phrases like porn addict around). I've seen some very strange sentiments about Europeans there (like thanks for informing me that all of us are monstrous bloodthirsty cannibals I guess) and Japan (which is ironic because it's mostly anime fandoms doing it). It doesn't make me wanna associate with them either.

--

*dying*

Nonnie, do you know how staggeringly often I get this question?

A big part of the answer is to not be a lurker. There are reasonable people out there, but they're much less visible than loud assholes, so the best way to find them is for them to find you.

Many of my closest fandom friends are people I met offline, either because they live near me or because we went to cons together. Others are people who turned up in replies on tumblr regularly. You need repeated contact that's memorable enough to recall the person as a distinct individual. I sometimes find that hard online. It really depends on frequency and them having something to say plus a good writing voice.

I know lots of people are shy or prefer to be lurkers. I get why. But you'll rarely meet anyone that way.

[horrorhot-line]

Last anon is a bhole and a coward. I don’t totally get the changes or like them rly but I can still respect that it’s YOUR blog and YOUR decision to make. Religion is important to some ppl and that’s fine lol.

Ik you already know this bc u said as much in ur reply, but just wanted to reiterate it to you so you know other ppl agree lol.

Also I’ll still stick around if u write non psychic saiki stuff! I’m here for ur writing skill and if anything ur writing is just gonna be more canon-like bc no one knows he has superpowers that’s the point. You’re just writing in universe lol. Lots of other ppl will agree w me, some won’t even notice the difference. Important bit is if this makes you happy you should keep doing it, whether people stick around or not. Plus your writing is good enough that you’ll get new ppl interested in it if you post it, and they’ll not even know about the stuff you wrote before.

I hope this made sense. I had a lot to say and idk if it came out right but Godspeed.

(Also my original ask had much harsher words for the anon but idk if that’s chill for ur posting w ur religion considering the stuff you said that wasn’t. Only mentioning bc I would like the anon to know that.)

what a distinguished gentleman, look at the way- sorry i'll stop with the references, but very demure response i approve

yes everything made sense and i appreciate your message soooo much thank you <33333

also, that's a great way to look at the changes in my story I didn't even think of that, but the first update was more of a means of seeing the opinions of my readers first- i'll have to heavily edit but my freinds to lovers series will be back, with saiki having powers ofc (but i'll have to specify that he isn't all powerful which is canonically true cause his powers have limits so technically not blasphemy) and it'll be a lot of slow burn and silent pining that ends with saiki and reader getting married, (this will also gimme a chance to make the series as gender neutral as possible) so I hope you'll still enjoy the series after I change it but a lot of it will probably stay the same <3333

also I myself don't curse, you're your own person so whatever you do is fine I won't ask you to change your behaviours for me, but I will say that it's very sweet that you stopped yourself from cursing out of respect for me and my beliefs <33333

also this is random but can we be moots? ;-; <333

[lacesoflove]

Hi Mackie <3

I wanted to ask, if it's okay, why you're leaving? And I mean this in the least offensive way possible, but you have a history of deleting blog(s) and starting new ones, so are you fr about perm quitting or are you just using that term to say you're quitting for a longer time than you normally do?

I hope that question doesn't come off as mean because I love your fics, and I noticed you used to post a lot about hating your writing and I mean this to no disrespect to other writers but your fics (along w like 2 other writers) were the only Hamzah fics I could enjoy because you wrote the stories so humanely - which imo is especially so so important for fics where yn is being paired with a real person (rather than like a fictional character, i.e a character from anime). Like your fics where the only ones where I could SEE myself being yn and I loved how your yns were not just self inserts and fans of hamzah! like they just felt so organic omg. And not even just your fics, but I always loved how you had input in the slushy community and interacted w people and did requests <33 ik you feel like you hate your writing but I have sm slushy friends who LOVE your works and I legit had a friend who was so excited to read your fics before she deleted them :(

I still always remember the period where I couldn't rlly find fics I liked for hamzah and I came across your fic hurting deeply and it was the first time since I was 12 (and deep in my wattpad era lmfao) where I stayed up all night to read a fic and reread it and like go over the story details and cheese over it, and that's actually crazy when like in that fic specifically hamzah and yn didn't even talk iirc. like holy shit you're so talented! the style of your writing, especially that fic (I can see why you said it was your magnum opus), reminds me sm of my favourite show fleabag and bojack horseman. and the fact that ill never know why hamzah and yn weren't talking to one another hurts me till this day - legit feels like when a show gets cancelled on a cliffhanger 😩

but on the other note i wish you sm love in whatever you do next <3

help me god what? this is so sweet what the fuck? to answer your questions to whoever this absolutely sweet angel asked me i'm quitting because:

mental health issues -> i've been struggling w/ disorded eating as well as suicidal ideation as of late, and i received really really horrible news about school that's pretty much killing my will to live rn (we move though, even if it just means rotating in bed)

i still, don't like my fics. ik people like to praise and compliment my works and i appreciate it sm holy shit, don't get me wrong, but my fics still don't meet my personal standard, and i have this fucking horrible habit of comparing my fics to other writers and comparing my writing (my thoughts will usually go like: "oh my god why couldn't i come up with a line like that" "holy fuck, compared to *x person*'s writing, i have so many spelling errors in comparison" "they way *x person* writes hamzah actually feels like him why don't i know how to characterise him") and then i just feel immense guilt because it's like i don't feel like i deserve notes and comments and community support when they are objectively better writers than me

i might come back - knowing myself. but unlike my previous breaks and deleting my old blog i knew i'd get the spark reignited to write again, but rn the spark isnt reigniting - in fact the lighter seems to be jammed and broken.

if i do want to write again - i will. if i don't, which is what it's feeling like because everything i write seems to be tainted with a layer of 'suckiness' that even all the praise i receive can't paint over and i just feel like a fraud or that my writing style just sounds pretentious. the only fic i still like is hurting deeply, and i feel like i can't chase that fics quality since so it's just like idk man,

i think i'm done for the time being <3

but thank you, again i love you all, this blog has literally saved me from ending my life like once before, so truly, thank you.

[piowasthere]

Hi Pio

How are you? How much sleep did you get last night? Have you eaten a proper meal yet since you have awaken? Are you feeling any negative emotions? Are you staying healthy?

This is totally optional and you can ignore this ask if you want. I was just worried because you mentioned a few things yesterday. Also sorry for making you cry, I seriously didn’t mean to. Very sorry. You don’t have to answer all the questions if you don’t want to or if they make you uncomfortable; if so, I am sorry. I worry about you and I love you and all you do, so I just want to make sure you’re okay because I really do care about you and your feelings and your health.

If you’re feeling down, just know you can talk to me and others. We will listen. We will acknowledge your feelings. We love you, Pio <3

-Ryo

rn, falling asleep in my seat. struggling and fighting to try and figure smth out to wake myself up a bit cuz i can't go to sleep yet and nap also isn't a good option. last night? maybe like 5h. not even whole, i don't think. i have eaten like half a sandwich, soup when i got back and am eating a thing rn, tbh i don't eat that much at all, was starving for most of the day but not like i can do much abt that. not really, just really, really tired and low-key in pain, that just happens, honestly i don't really feel anything at all rn, this is as neutral as it gets no :D

don't worry! i didn't actually cry but even if, these would be as /pos tears as it would get, i honestly don't think you can make me cry in a negative way even if u tried, so worry not! ^^

this is me literally just truthfully answering the questions, not trying to vent or anything but now that i've written it down, i see how shit it actually sounds like ok, sure it was shit, long day and i do absolutely nothing to make it easier on myself but i am fine, really

this is prolly gonna be the only time i post smth like this. i don't want this blog to be- this. this is my way to get away from it all, just a silly little dude in a fandom, i've got real life to focus on my problems not a public blog ppl follow to see art on and ik some ppl r sensitive to this kind of crap or smth, so i just rather not

i appreciate this a lot ppl don't check up on me, so this is smth new if you want to talk, i would just ask to dm me instead. I am very willing to talk about whatever, but again - i don't want to post this kind of stuff to the open. internet is negative enough as it is. my dms are always open to anyone for any reason!

thank you again, means the world to me <3

[youremyheaven]

https://www.tumblr.com/youremyheaven/757354769389109248/i-had-some-perspective-altering-sex-with-this?source=share

didi i am thats college anon i think you need tobtell your beauty secret or they mantra and tantra you are doing you are just attracting Venusian man like 🧲🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️ how... the half of eorld is mad for you spell the secrete didi ( i am tsking notes ) hehe 😈😈😈😈

I've been chanting mantras for years 😭😭😭so that definitely could be why. I worship one tantric Goddess who I feel deeply connected to and then I worship another non-tantric Goddess. I firmly believe we should worship who calls to us??? Like I felt called by her to worship her. SHE chose me.

Ngl my whole life, I've had guys go crazy for me 😌 and imo I wasn't as pretty then (as a teenager) as I am now as a 24yr old woman but over the years I've attracted men who would literally do anything for me 😭 and I'm pretty sure I mention the "he's been asking me out for a year, the other guy's been obsessed with me for 5years etc" but that's the thing, no one who's ever wanted me stops wanting me and I literally don't have to do anything. I don't talk to them. I don't go out with them. I give them absolutely nothing in return but now I realise that all these men are most likely Venusians bc nobody else will love you like that.

I've had all kinds of encounters with men and many have been unpleasant so it's not like every man I see is a lovesick Venusian who worships me or anything but yeah I am a magnet for Venusian men 😭😭😭

I've also been practicing tantra yoga for years now and I think my sexual energy is very well developed 😌and potent 😳

People who say things like "I attract the wrong kind of attention bc I'm sexy" are lowkey deluding themselves ngl, I'm not saying you'll never meet creeps (that's not something you can control) but well cultivated sexual energy (qi as the Chinese call it) makes people respect you and worship you. It's very powerful. There's a reason why ancient Indian temples have sexual iconography, it's because sexual energy is so potent 🤌

I've never deliberately tried to seduce men tbh. I won't lie, I've cultivated a certain amount of physical magnetism 😳 but I feel like the less I care or the less "bhaav" (attention) I give them, the more they want me. I don't do it on purpose. I'm just not someone who can text and call someone frequently, I really need my alone time and I HATEEEE talking about myself (ik I talk about myself a lot on this blog but if you pay attention you'll know how little I actually share) I hate being asked questions about my life 😭 even irl 😭 and I genuinely dislike the whole "getting to know someone" stage 😭 I feel drained sharing my inner world with others??? Irl I don't speak much 😭to most people and I prefer the company of those I can be comfortably silent with 😭 like I make small talk with many people and THEY share their deepest darkest secrets with me and I occasionally say TMI shit like I do on my blog but in general very few people could name 5 things about me lmao 💀 I think me being very private has made me more "mysterious" and "intriguing" (that's what I hear from people) and it increases the desire that one feels. The more hard to reach somebody is, the more you want them etc 👀

So the key is probably not being constantly available, not really caring about them, minding your own business, maintaining yourself and being conventionally feminine 🤌🤌🤌🤠

[sos717]

Heyy I wanna ask u something, why lot of non dualisme bloggers seems Soo strict about it ? I mean ik desiring etc it's just ego thing ik that and nothing is real etc ik that , but what's wrong with wanting to experience something else? Like what I'm experiencing rn it's is what it's is cuz I'm aware about it , but what if I want to be aware about something else? It's still no real but it's bad to wants a new character?? Like just to have fun in my human experience!! Is that bad ? Cuz they're claiming that it's still desiring etc even I'm not desiring and I'm Soo detached to the point that I lost myself and my life I couldn't feel any bad for any suggestion I gone through but this making me lose fun and joy , I want to have passion to experience fun and joy again!!! And even now I'm not where I want to be cuz I can't experience myself like I want, I don't have freedom in somethings, what I don't find it fair is they are claiming that it's desiring and it's ego thing etc , meanwhile themselves charged Thier dr to dr , like just by being aware, what I'm trying to say is that ok that nothing Worth it but that doesn't mean that I need to lose joy in my human experience!!! Right? It's Soo easy for them to be like u don't need to change anything or accept it as it's is when they're in comfortable position to start with , again I'm not judging and idk what going on in others lives, again sorry I talked loooot I hope u can help me I will appreciate it , and tbh I found it easy what u talk about etc I'm new to your blog but I feel like u trying to make it easy to understand Wich I really appreciate it 💞💞

Hey there! I think allot of people think that knowing what is, also means they have to abide by it in any and every case. I think this entire illusions purpose is the experience. Doesn’t matter if all of this is no-thing or hollow, it won’t be disappearing just because we understand the true nature of existence. So with that in mind I find it, personally, useless to not want to enjoy what we can. The “human experience��� is beautiful. We shouldn’t be backing away from realizing and experience that is enjoyable because why should we? Why should someone have to put up with something that puts them down or debilitates them? I truly don’t like the direction allot these bloggers go sometimes when someone is talking to them for advice about being depressed or it being hard to overcome something and they turn into a 2 sentence horror story robot with vague pointers. 😭 dropping something like “there is no one suffering” and that’s it, like girl we get itttt…. But a feeling though illusory and labeled by self, still is an experience, and if someone doesn’t want to feel like that 24-7 why shouldn’t we give them more concise information about what a though it or a feeling and what we’re capable of doing in regards to well, disregarding the feeling, etc. anyways I rambled for a while lol, thank you for the compliments you guys are genuinly so nice, I feel grateful to have such a good community going.

[1-49]

update:

﹙ also , look away ! i finally summoned the courage to break my silence , & didn’t overthink pressing post ﹚

seriously... ive got no clue who im writing all of this to, or am i just writing it to myself, but im doing it anywayy!! truth is, ive kept it quiet for soo long. also not to say, i have to, ultimately, accept this is my blog even tho i act/feel like im stranger to it

& nonn too exciting except it’s my birth month and i feel like i should give myself a little credit bc... eventually, someone has to :'-) not to mention ive gone through all the days in the past 9 months where i wanted to say or share something... scream over an update or summ-but i held back given i hadn’t posted anything. srsly nothing uplifts this fact.

and if anyone was / is ever annoyed by that it’s likely just me! because- at the of the day, all ive done this past entire year is genuinely! really, write.. yeah, ik :/ corny as it sounds, but the fact that nothing is complete or out there yet, is a bit, if not a lot! disheartening, considering the time and effort ive put in;(

but smth ive come to realize prior this blog it’s things do take time, and i do this for myself, and i do it willingly!! so i tend to take careful time creating what will essentially feed my inner- reader. im rarely ever satisfied, so you can imagine how much smth takes me. also theres this dumb logic i keep to : y say or hint at something i know it won’t be finished for a loong time and ill need a lot more days until i write it?

just an empty promise. & the irony of it, right? as if this entire update isnt in itself that, pointless. but hey-i know im writing

im coming up to a few issues with my next work considering it’s gotten too large and im just somewhat only in the middle.

ive been working on this specific work since august 16th. like legit started this whole journey with a single scene in mind and mindfucking to me, i still haven’t gotten to it to write it... i feel so insane sometimes for being so slow and for dragging so unnecessary much but then i realize that’s just my style and that this work is beyond me... ive laid out its foundations that way, so it’s how this is going to be until its end; ive got no intention of running the storyline now that ive hit midway.

it’s a continuous input ive done month in-and i just love every part of it :') i love that im crating it and i love the process. but im kinda scared of the end. of the day is done and ill have to eventually share it. & once it’s out, it’ll be something that’s so beyond me to control.

ive done works in the past that got labeled & hidden from the tags for readers to engage; & this an ultimate hurt for creator so i think ill feel especially discouraged if this next thing gets the same luck lol given all of its mature themes& overall dark and serious undertones.. yet, it’s not all that... idk :/ it kind of feels conflicting to judge it myself, bc i wasn’t and won’t ever be the proper one to do so; like for example those works then that did got labelled. i never forsee that possibility, but now i do. still... the only thing i can do- is set the warnings properly.

though i feel like im writing it in a totally wrong time, and for an unknown (age) audience, tasting wishy-washy waters and themes which may not be as interesting(?)like ive got no grip of how this will go, im writing in uncertainty.

plus the fact it’s already too long... like i always try tell myself okay, it’s not for everyone! ik that... this typa fics probs would have done great during covid- when we collectively had extra time to spend in indulging long fanfics- but what do i know... maybe people still enjoy the art of slowburns? then again, it’s likely me who’s going to get overwhelmed once it’s time to go thru the entire thing for fixes, cuts and adds but that’s for months in the future!

as for what it seems, ill have to cut the fic in several parts as tumblr won’t allow that many blocks / as for the word count, is expected to reach an insane number by the time im done, as if it’s not crazy already ⸺ though i agree; it be way more digestible if i separated it. & ive got the game down already! parts,chapters, povs... the story is complex, and so i tried my best to divide it properly, and ill try continue to do the same with the rest i write. kinda bugs me that ill have to post it like this- as it’s not series, but it is what it is.

and.. i don’t have a date... im losing it every time i find myself trying to set a deadline⸺i just have this overall projection of the time ill be freer to focus on this work-entirely- beside my irl job- which would be this entire summer to myself to speed up the process... and if so, im aiming at a year old release but let me not get ahead of myself!

i want to talk endlessly about this work. about the inspiration just anything about it... it is genuinely a monster. for example all ive done besides it, the way it came up-and is still forming to be. the way it’s filled my months & my life, but fuck it, eh... ive succeeded in keeping it shut &mysterious when i so badly wanted to say smth, so guess ill do just fine!

please, im hanging on at least 3 people to give this a go- and experience this fucking work the way ive intended it!! i feel it takes you out on a journey, or it’s how i treat & see it as such.

at last, i want to cheer the brave few that have hit that follow even with all the tumbleweeds over here...You are something!

❤︎

[plus-i-miss-you]

"𝑑𝑜 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑡𝘩𝑖𝑛𝑘 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑘𝑛𝑜𝑤 𝑤𝘩𝑎𝑡 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝑖𝑠?"

(layout by @/ameyumez!)

hi hi!! welcome to my milgram x reader blog!! ik milgram is probably not the best media for x reader content but eh i'm doing this for fun 👍

🧡 about me:

♡ lina

♡ 21 y/o

♡ demigirl + any pronouns

♡ my other fandoms are twisted wonderland, project sekai, vocaloid, honkai star rail, genshin impact, fragaria memories and many others

♡ my favorite characters are yuno, mahiru and amane + i also like haruka and muu

♡ i prefer to use lowercase letters most of the time because uh.. i hate capitalism

♡ i also have some other blogs you can check out below!

please read this before you request:

🧡 rules:

♡ because of the nature of the project, please remember that literally anything can easily get confirmed or turn out to be wrong, so i can't say that my writing will be 100% in character.

♡ please specify whether you want the reader to be the guard or the prisoner and their gender, otherwise i'll go with gn!reader.

♡ same goes for the setting, if your request doesn't mention it, please specify whether you want it to take place in a prison or a non-prison au/casual setting.

♡ my character limit is four characters per request, but i can write more when it comes to self-indulgent stuff or events (if there will be any djkdlssld).

♡ mentioning whether you want it to be the t1/t2 version of the prisoner would also help a lot!

♡ i'm a system myself, so i'll try my best to write mikosys as accurately as possible, but i'm a newly discovered system, so i can still make some mistakes.

♡ speaking of mikosys, if you're requesting something for them and your request doesn't mention it, please specify if you're asking for mikoto or john/orekoto.

♡ also, i prefer to see john as a part of mikoto, but also a separate character, so if you're requesting something for both mikoto and john, i will count them as two characters, so please keep that in mind when you request something!

🧡 what i will write:

♡ all main project prisoners + es

♡ both romantic and platonic headcanons (everything i write for amane will be strictly platonic)

♡ fluff, angst, comedy, etc

♡ guard!reader and prisoner!reader

♡ both t1 and t2 prisoners (+ maybe some t3 headcanons/theories?..)

♡ gn!reader, male!reader, fem!reader (a note: because of how popular the theory about kazui being gay is and because of the possibility of it being confirmed, i'd prefer to write only gn!reader and male!reader when it comes to him)

♡ both mikoto and john/orekoto

♡ non-prison au

♡ i prefer to write headcanons rather than scenarios simply because headcanons are easier to write jdkldsjssk

♡ i also may post general/non-x reader writing here (like crimeswap au, alternate verdicts au, etc) if y'all are interested :)

🧡 depends on the request:

♡ because of the nature of the project, i'm totally okay with writing dark content, including yandere, but i have a right not to wriite something if it makes me uncomfortable for one reason or another.

♡ as mentioned below, i don't write nsfw, but i'm okay with suggestive stuff, but again, i may be uncomfortable with some of it. also, i will write content like this only for the adult characters, meaning everyone except es, haruka, muu and amane.

🧡 what i won't write:

♡ novel characters (i don't think there's enough canon stuff to write anything about them tbh..)

♡ side characters and victims (as much as i would love to write something for rei, hinako, shidou's wife, etc, again, we know even less when it comes to them)

♡ nsfw (again, suggestive/light nsfw is okay, but only with adult characters)

♡ even though i like the threekoto theory a lot, i won't write for midokoto/greenkoto/doe, since it's not confirmed and there's not much i can do when it comes to his character.

🧡 my other blogs:

@linabirb (my main/personal blog)

@linawritestwst (my twst writing blog)

@linalilia (my old personal blog)

@linawritesocs (my twst ocs blog)

@linagram (my milgram ocs blog)

@008-edits (my edits blog)

🧡 masterlist

[choccy-milky]

Hi! I started reading your story sometime in the last week and I’m OBSESSED! I normally don’t have much patience and can’t get myself to read anything past like 15k or anything that’s still being worked on, but your story hooked me almost instantly! I really liked the description and decided to give it a try and I’m so glad I did. The detailed descriptions you give pull me into the story and the way you seamlessly switch points of view feels so natural. I just wanted to let you know how much I’m enjoying reading so far and I’m excited for more! ❤️

AW TYSM😭😭 this means a lot, esp since ive been kinda self conscious about the length of my fic lately (and also how long its gonna end up being once im actually done LMFAO) and ik my chapters have gotten ginormous BAHAHA so im glad that even if you don't usually read long stuff you still gave my fic a try and enjoyed it so much + are looking forward to more!!💖💖so ty again😭🙏 AND as usual i'll be using this to answer other asks:

thank you and AA im glad to hear it!! a lot of people have been telling me ive been inspiring them to draw lately and i love it (im just sorry i dont have any concrete tips to give people other than keep practicing LOL) but good luck and i hope you keep at it!!🥰🥰

GIRL IDK, IDEK HOW LONG THE STORY IS GONNA BE, but assuming im still brainrotted even when its done then YEAH u wouldnt be able to stop me if you tried😊 (im glad you like them so much as well, ty!!😭)

thank you!! and yes i usually have at least a vague idea of what i want in the story before i start, though a lot of it didn't become concrete until i started writing/things evolving from there. i made a big (slightly) vague timeline of the entire fic from beginning to (almost) end, and then i keep fleshing it out from there as the ideas keep coming to me/evolving, and for each chapter i make an even more detailed outline, and THEN i get started on the final chapter. so its a bit of a process bahaha, but the brainstorming is really fun!! as for any advice, im not sure. maybe just brainstorm/write down scenes and ideas that you know for a fact that you want to put in your fic, and then try to find a way to connect them to other scenes from there and work backwards. basically WRITE WHAT YOU WANT TO READ, cuz like im my own biggest fan fr, thats the most important part LMAO

LMFAO speaking of outlining future events.....this may or may not happen in the future/in an epilogue when clora is pregnant and she got those pregnant woman hormones that seb is fighting for his LIFE to keep up with HAHAHA

ive been drawing since i was 4 years old so...a while. LOL. and if you even look back to the beginning of my blog, my first drawings of seb were SO UGLY💀💀 so if you just keep drawing you constantly get better naturally (also in response to the other ask you sent as well, i use clip studio paint to draw!)

AW TYYY. AND YES CLORA WILL HAVE ANOTHER MC MOMENT, the ranrok confrontation is still coming, after all...👀👀 and true, idek who would win if clora and seb duelled again with neither of them holding back, but u are so right. even if clora DID win that would do nothing to change sebs mind about how protective he is LMFAO. THANK YOU AGAIN im glad you like my fic + drawings so much!!💖💖

BAHAHAH in my fic (for smut reasons and so that they could be 17 when they did the nasty) i made clora's bday april 3rd and sebs february 12, so clora is an aries and seb is an aquarius (and yes i just checked and apparently they ARE compatible, so seb can rest. also i just read up on aquarius and damn it unintentionally suits seb so well?? LOL "Aquarius is undoubtedly the most innovative, progressive, rebellious, and humanitarian. " and "They have incredible energy, though they may not always use it wisely. They find it easy to get through life on charm and good looks." LMFAO. ok king we love that

[123gocat]

(okaayy first actual pinned post bio thing,,.. here we go,,,.,. ,,.. )

haii!!! i'm 123gocat but u can jus call me cat. this blog has a lot of stuff,., really random stuff sometimes but i usually post art of my characters and sometimes fanart. i also just post whatever, like thoughts that come into my head, random song lyrics, or just a question i might have for whoever it is watching.

⭐️stuff about me igg??🌈

he/him oNLY!! i don't like being called they,,/them,n, i wont correct you but like just know that okayyy??

-furry!! very cringe oooooo scary

-i lovvee, cats :33 ,,duhh

- i'm an animator and song producer, i someday wish to make stuff with lyrics but not yet

-i LOVE rainbows n colorful stuf n yesss

-i like the styles webcore, scenecore, rainbowcore, and just pretty colorful thingz in generalll!!!!!

-i like smiling friends, dog man, vocaloid, animation memes, pjsk, matt rose, failboat, uhh probably some more but idk rnn

-i type weird.., it should make sense but jeah i am very silly witf my typing ;p

(click below for dni and additional account info)

⚠️B4 U INTERACT‼️

i have really bright stuff on my page that might hurt ur eyez x-X

i don't typically swear but sometimes i'll link songs and videos with them, or reblogz 0^o

iam minor ⛏️ i will NAWT give age!!!!! stawp askimm,,. I SEE YOU!!!

i am verz mental illness.,. doctors are confused but they have stuff in mind. i don't feel comfortable saying what it is, only few irl ppl can know and u know who u are!!

if you know my irl name or other personal info, don't mention it online!! sure u guys already know haha (like 4 ppl i thiinkk??)

ALSO!!

i don't usually keep track of/follow controversy or drama, so i apologize if i reference media with problematic figures!! if you are to point it out, please be respectful.

- i do this because it's hard to believe what i see online and you don't usually ever see the other side of the story.

- i also have a hard time with telling if some stuff is real/not real sometimes so i don't want to involve myself in anything that worsens that behavior.

- even if the person IS truly a bad person, i don't approve of harassment or threats on anybody especially online

- i don't really know them? and i don't know you,,. online is scaryz

also if yk stuff that makes me nervous or triggers me, don't use it against me ;w; ik it's sort of "asking for it" as i've been told, but really, not even as a joke please

i don't really consider this a kids account but it's not like,,. super adult at all? you can be of any age just please be mindful of the stuff i already said above.

❌DNI/STUFF TO NAWT DO!!🚫

don't press political beliefs or anything don't even talk politic,.s. i don,t, like it very much ;-;

don't beg fur money!! i don't have any!! stawp nagging me!! /ref

don't use my art/anything i make to model/train ai!! i do not condone to that!!

also, i've seen some people doing this, but don't make ai chatbots of my characters!! idk if it's happened yet probably not i don't have any apps like that i wouldn't know ggrrr

i don't mind mild swearing i don't really care just no saying slurs. and don't do sexual talk or whatever i don like it wuuhh

🐾✨MY FURSONA!!! >:3 🌈💫

you'll see him a lot on here ^w^ he's very epic,,.

oh gawd how do i make the picture smaller

his design is verz flexible he can do a lotta things. yes he has a tail.., it's fluffy

heres the non anthro version

okay that's about it fur him,. i have other characters too you'll see em on here somewher..,

🎨COMMISSIONS!!🍬

https://www.etsy.com/shop/123GoCat <<<< :3

5 dolar

half body furry any species but just not like terribly complex. like it caan be complex but that would have 2 b extra monezz.., i think idk how etsy wurkkz.

i always get comments asking if i'm available for commission,. yes i am . it's rihgt ther. stawp askin.

OTHER SOCIALS!! 🩷💜🩵💛

uhh that's about it, byee!! >w<

[sungbeam]

(going off of ur reblog) THATS SO REAL LMFAO i oscillate between never checking grades and then obsessively checking them 💀💀 both are anxiety inducing so ig there’s no winning for us 😔😔 AND YEAHHH agree completely with the holidays & finals really making the end of the year busy—luckily my family doesn’t go all out for holidays but i’ve seen what other families do and i’m just like damn 👀 personally i could never but if people enjoy it i’m very happy for them 🙏

ALSO HELL YESSS we’re both academic weapons 🙏 lmao real i fucked up my gpa last semester so this semester i had to LOCK TF IN and make sure it didn’t drop any more 😭 and i’m in healthcare!! i don’t like to get *too* specific on tumblr because my major is really niche and if you google it my college immediately comes up 💀 lowk whenever i feel like i’m drowning i always stalk ur blog because ik ur pre-med (and also double majoring u crazy talented gal) and i’m like “alr duckie’s in the trenches too we gotta woman in stem our way outta this” HA 😭

so real about the crying/sick during exams too 💀 i was literally that student SOBBING during the exam during one of my midterms hdsbcjdnkx i can’t deal with math 😭

hopefully we both get to rest up well over this break!! i too am ignoring any possibility of productivity because i’m so committed to rotting 💀 spring semester is gonna kick my assss and i need time to rest (is what i’m telling myself)

how does ur spring semester look bae? hopefully not too packed or stressful <33 i believe in u!! hoping ur having a lovely day/night 😽🫶

it truly is the most anxious thrill of our student lives 💀 like i need to invent a way to check my grades without it being like waiting for a jumpscare to happen TT oh wait — maybe that's just dropping out of school 🤡🤡 my family also doesn't go all out for the holidays, but some years we get roped into family gatherings for lunch/dinner or i host a small holiday thing w my friends kdnfkd no fs like hats off to those who can go all out for the holidays tho, i truly don't have the energy for that 😭

i needed to lock in too omg this past quarter was actually so gross 😭 then again, it could've been a lot worse :'))) ahhh icic healthcare girlies rise up HAHA (even as the system beats us down 😭) WAIT THATS SO FUNNY PLS SKFNDKFN WE'RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER THO BESTIE 🤝🏼 im not technically double majoring? (i once looked up the requirements to double major in bio and i exited out of that tab so fast like 💀 naw i wanna graduate), but it's like basically the same amt of work ig i just don't get it on a diploma 💔 omg i can't do math either, unless it's like a problem ik how to do? idk if that makes sense TT but mathematical problem solving doesn't come easy to me 😭 i have a friend who starts LAUGHING during an exam,, idek she gets possessed

YES LETS REST UP BEFORE THE NEXT SEMESTER/QUARTER 😭😭 it's ur last sem before graduation tho (i think?) so ur completely justified for rotting ksnfkdnf my next quarter is not looking great if im being honest.... apparently one of my ochem profs is absolutely ass and im taking four classes again just to meet my intended graduation time (im trying to graduate a year early ,, don't look at me like that,, 😭😭 my head hurts thinking abt it) I BELIEVE IN U TOO THO!! if u need someone to talk/rant to im here for ya — women in stem solidarity !! 🫂 have a lovely day/night beloved 💖💖

[littletealseal]

TW: animal death mention

Wish I wouldn't keep starting these posts like this but!... hey guys, been awhile hasn't it?... muh

Ok but for real a lot has been happening in my life since I last fell off this website... again, I've been doing some stuff with my girlfriend and spending time with her too, we've been working on some projects that aren't art but video game related so that's also a thing... and then the biggest thing to shake my world up...

My dog Vanilla Swirl... has sadly passed away...

Ik ik this is kinda a big thing to drop but I feel I need to just get it out there because while I knew my life would be flipped from the trauma of loosing her.. I didn't know it would be this bad. Like ever since last week when we had to put her down (she was very old at 14 years and was ready to move on ) I felt like I had zero energy, even less energy than I already had issues with! I couldn't bring myself to check in on people I knew and even games for daily stuff, plus I got a bad stomach bug last week as well so that didn't help anything.

I'm not trying to gain any sympathy but to just explain where I've been and where I want to go with this blog.

I deleted my last art piece since I honestly felt after thinking on things it was a very stupid post to make, "not needing certain things" I was so dumb to think that stuff, because I'm needing to regress more than ever due to all this trauma being hurled at me now, not to mention just getting through each day without any problems. Man this post is sounding more and more like a vent post huh?

I honestly want to get back into drawing, because it's something I've always had at my disposal, my ability to draw and create. I'm honestly getting real tired of just letting my abilities rot away and not being able to do anything with them when I need them most. I want to perfect my skills and go somewhere with them, so from this post forward I'm going to attempt to post a drawing (being a doodle or full illustration) here or on my mains just so then at least I can get back into the swing of things, just like how it was when I was a kid 💔

I'm not sure when I'll make a digital drawing since I want to get a proper setup for that (since with how things are with my tablet and it's cables it's driving me NUTS ) but look forward to some classic paper and pen doodles from me :3

See you guys later c: