#if you're wondering how i know this i know because he is me 😊

[asilosmagdalena]

Kendall may not have actually killed himself in the finale, but Jeremy was going to turn the final scene into a suicide attempt, which ultimately didn't play out but you know he was dead inside. But the thing is, although he said "I might die" if he didn't become CEO, he knew that being CEO would still kill him, and that's partially why he tried to keep Roman out of it. Trying to become CEO knowing it would alienate himself from everyone and destroy him was the real suicide attempt.

The end of every season is the same for Kendall. I genuinely think the driving while high was a suicide attempt that ended in the worst possible way. Condemning Logan at the end of season 2 was a suicide attempt, effectively cutting him off from his family and father who had leverage over him. Falling asleep in the pool was a suicide attempt and we all know that. If anything, although on the surface he lost, there's the slightest glimmer of hope for him now.

[verstarppen]

Hello beautiful human!!! So - I’m in love with the smau’s you make, and I had a thought for one… what about a Logan Sargeant x youngest royal reader (ya know, like a younger sister of Prince Harry and Prince William), and she is completely distanced from her brothers and is in love with/engaged to Logan? I just love the idea 🥰

Hope you have a wonderful day!!!

summary; not to flex, but how many f1 drivers can say they're dating a princess?

pairing; logan sargeant x fem! princess! reader [ no faceclaim ]

a/n; for legal reasons im afraid of the british royal family and i don't want to get diana-ed so i've made her the princess of a land that may or may not be named after sims medieval please don't kill me; this is my send off to logan, thank you for your service king we love you <3

liked by eagle_hunter_2, ls2bathrug and 2,507,888 others

monarchofslayington Greetings! My butler proposed that it would be delightful to host a Q&A session, given the multitude of inquiries, both digital and handwritten, expressing a keen interest in the culture of Yacothia. Please leave your questions in the comment section.

— Princess Y/N of Yacothia

view all 980,082 comments

benjamin_long_2000 what's it like living in a castle?

monarchofslayington In truth, it is rather tedious and profoundly tranquil—occasionally reaching an ambiance reminiscent of a horror film.

abhijeetdeppiesse DOES THE QUEEN REPLY

monarchofslayington No, it is the princess who does.

jantellerman81 Do you have lots of free time or are you busy all day?

monarchofslayington I lend my support to charitable endeavors, visit events as an esteemed representative of my family, and intermittently travel to bolster diplomatic relations with foreign nations. Nevertheless, I reserve Sundays for respite.

eagle_hunter_2 Are you looking for a prince?

monarchofslayington Perchance eagle_hunter_2 You can't just say perchance

liked by ls2bathrug, oscarpiastri, yacothiaracing and 672,361 others

logansargeant Big fan of Yachothia's unemployed driver support group

view all 51,451 comments

danielricciardo Aren't we all

yacothiaracing hey king

francolapinto i'm also seatless for next year so if you'd be so kind to help me slide into their dms

logansargeant I've got you, brother danielricciardo Mate francolapinto @ yacothiaracing are you my iron deficiency because i'm falling for you yacothiaracing sold dannielricciardo You can't be serious francolapinto ;)

liked by monarchofslayington, logansargeant, yacothiaracing and 988,984 others

fernandoalo_oficial Perfect night 🎉😀👏🏻

view all 320,842 comments

maxverstappen1 Night club so good I might buy another cat

monarchofslayington It would be an honour

realmvettel THE PRINCESS IN THE LIKES STOPPPP

julyestie i don't think people realize how crazy this is, imagine the prince of monaco likes charles' post armstrongslayer look at her following the whole grid is there lmaooo

logansargeant Thank you for letting me join

fernandoalo_oficial You're still a part of this logansargeant Who's cutting onions

liked by monarchofslayington, alex_albon, logansargeant and 213,951 others

lilymhe If Alfred had instagram he would've liked this post

view all 80,415 comments

monarchofslayington I am perpetually able to engage with social media via Her Highness, esteemed madam. - Alfred

alex_albon Can you share your Soup au pistou recipe monarchofslayington I shall not, good sir. alex_albon damn it

smilesargeant oh my god he's smashing a princess i never had a chance did i

forzapluto you and me both sister

ls2bathrug I am ever delighted to extend to you the gracious invitation of a visit 😊

ls2bathrug wait ls2bathrug fuck logansargeant Wrong account, doll ls2bathrug yes thank you captain obvious i hadn't noticed ls2bathrug STOP BLOWING UP MY NOTIFICATIONS YOU DEMONS

liked by alex_albon, logansargeant, yacothiaracing and 1,252,352 others

monarchofslayington i can finally say this THAT'S MY BOYFRIENDDDDD HE'S MINEEEE

view all 542,098 comments

verstappler "how were we supposed to know" HER NAME IS MONARCH OF SLAYINGTON

papayasalad I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE IT

monarchofslayington i'll always be your rug, lando enjoyer

logansargeant 😘

monarchofslayington are you flirting with me or smthin

francolapinto the seat deal is still on right

monarchofslayington hmmmmm francolapinto was your mom an artist because she made a masterpiece logansargeant 😐

pic credits; instagram and pinterest

fic-specific taglist; @spilled-coffee-cup @onecojg @cixrosie @sheridamn @namgification @thehufflepuffavenger1 @sxrcxsm26 @mehrmonga @mellowarcadefun @dark-night-sky-99 @multifandomwhore-003 @theblueblub @julezstinkz @vamplyle @yuki-tsunodas @ttokkisbee @eloriis @raizelchrysanderoctavius @itseightbeats @nitiii @i-m-in-loki-s-army @prettymonegasque

blog taglist; @wtfisakilometer2 @aexitizen-ln4 @biitch-with-wifi @localwhoore @redbullphantasmagoria @cixrosie @sheridamn @weunstan @namgification @whatislifebutlemons @demvnsriot @stinkyjax @sxrcxsm26 @beskardroids @tbsloneely @mehrmonga @marymustdie @mellowarcadefun @geniusalpaca @theblueblub @ayrtonsennatea @resident-swiftie @moonraysandstars @tellybearryyyy @coffeehurricanes @vamplyle @mrsmelinda @ttokkisbee @eloriis @raizelchrysanderoctavius @ln8118 @neferaskingdom @emppusofi @itseightbeats @nitiii @abunchofbutterflies @kiki-sleeps

(there are so many references in this it's insane)

[visacardteamloverrr]

ex's or not? cs55

summary: y/n and carlos once were the it couple, how are their lives after the breakup? did everyone move on?

warnings: writing this i was sick, i was done and i was ready to delete so enjoyy

i also was supposed to write part 2 to i'll be waiting but oh well...

y/njazzy

liked by lilymunihe, carmenmundt, and 65 000 more

y/njazzy Prague you've been great, next up my beloved Vienna 🍒

comments

y/nstan mother is GLOWING

lilymunihe music to my ears (literally) 🫶🫶

y/njazzy i'm blushing 😊 💋

alexandrasaintmleux i haven't heard you play for agesss, see you in Vienna ig

y/njazzy and whose fault it is?? clearly not mine missy

alexandrasaintmleux oh look at the time, i have to go !!!

chillis the post breakup glow up is reaaal

loverofy/n can we expect some album soon queen?

charlesleclerc exactly @/y/njazzy, care to share with the class???

y/njazzy i will not confirm nor deny

y/njazzy and lord perceval do not push my limits. besides, if you would honour me with your presence, you would know. the choice is yours

charlesleclerc no comment.

user1 she calls him the way that carlos does...

jazzychill she looks so hot in red 🔥

chillistan don't you find it weird that after all charles is in her comments?

y/nfan through all the years y/n was with carlos, she formed a friendship with charles (especially with carlos in ferrari) and other people from the paddock, so it's nothing weird

jazzlover besides, alex and y/n are besties, no?

y/nlos do you remember how carlos would always melt when y/n wear red??? because i do.

carlossainz55

liked by landonorris, charlesleclerc, y/njazzy, and 2,093,728 more

carlossainz55 🌶🍔☀️

comments

soylago ON MY KNEEEES

charlosfan what do they feed our drivers, he and charles are soooo hot

chillis the second photo, two plates, carlos sainz is that a date?

landonorris and where are pics from our little golf tournament 🤔🤔🤔 oh, maybe they aren't here because YOU LOST AHAHAHAHHA

carlossainz55 cabron we all know you cheated.

landonorris what a sore loser we have here

charlesleclerc do you remember when we played uno once?

maxverstappen i wonder why you played uno only once

charlesleclerc lando almost lost an eye

landonorris I ALMOST DIED, HE TRIED TO KILL ME

carlossainz55 do NOT listen to them, those situations did not happen

carlossteponme Y/N LIKED???!!

y/nfan they actually still like eachothers posts, i believe they said something about mutual breakup and that there's no hard feelings between them

y/njazzy

liked by yourbestie, lilymunihe, and 64,728 more

y/njazzy new project coming up 🔜

comments

landonorris tell me who he is.

y/njazzy no❤️

landonorris and why exactly ???

y/njazzy i'll tell you, you'll tell oscar, oscar will tell logan, logan alex, and then magically the whole grid will know

landonorris you won't even tell your best friend?

y/njazzy you're talking about yourself or ?

landonorris PARDON #exbesties #friendshipover #offended

y/njazzy WAR IS OVEEEER

landonorris bye.

lilymunihe A MAN? A MAN? A MA-A-A-AN

lilymunihe girlies to the gc riGHT IN THIS MOMENT

lilymunihe avengers ASSEMBLE @/alexandrasaintmleux @/carmenmundt

carmenmundt i think we've missed a chapter here...

y/njazzy alex didn't.

carmenmundt excuse me !

lilymunihe SHE DID WHAT

alexandrasaintmleux tf y/n? i thought i meant something to you?

y/njazzy if i'm going down i'm taking everybody with me 😘😘😘

alexandrasaintmleux DO NOT QUOTE CHANDLER RN

user1 carlosy/nnation how are we feeling

user2 we don't.

user5 i have an idea...

user3 don't. don't give me hope

user7 fuck the guy NEW PROJECT IN THE MAKING ??? NEW MUSIC ???

user9 do i sense some movie soundtrack

liked by autor

user2 can you imagine

user5 Y/N LIKED !!!!!

carlossainz55

liked by maxverstappen, y/njazzy and 2,836,267

carlossainz55 getaway with mi amor

comments

charlesleclerc i pay my respects to her

carlossainz55 ¿disculpe?

charlesleclerc for putting up with you 😘

user carlos sainz jr i was NOT familiar

user1 which one of you bastards stole my man

reyesvdec ❤️

user2 APPROVED BY MAMA SAINZ

user6 i miss her and y/n together in the paddock

user5 that's y/n. mark my words

user1 i truly aspire to be as delusional as you

y/njazzy she's a lucky girl

carlossainz55 im a lucky boy*

user8 y/n's comment? im dead

user3 carlos' response?????? i am crying, the boy really is in love

y/njazzy

liked by carlossainz55, reyesvdec and 482,471 more

y/njazzy love. love love love.

comments

user8 our girl is in loooove 🥹

alexandrasaintmleux match made in heaven

carmenmundt you compliment eachother so well 🫶

landonorris you two are disgusting

y/njazzy jealousy, jealousy

user5 the luckiest girl???? i wonder why... maybe because she has carlos sainz

user ring ring, that's the mental ward calling for you

lilymunihe i'm heartbroken, how could you leave me

alex_albon execuse me? i'm right here??

y/njazzy lily it's just an act, let's run away together

lilymunihe i am ready to go

alex_albon HEY ITS NOT FAIR

alex_albon he can't even stand up for himself

carlosssainz55 he can

carlossainz55

liked by y/njazzy, landonorris and 5,839,821

carlossainz55 mi amor, you're the closest to heaven that I have ever been. I don't know what I did to deserve you, but I promise to cherish you forever. I am so incredibly grateful for you and everything you do. I want to thank you for being there for me, even after we broke up. there is no one else on this earth taht i would spend my life with. you are my person, and I am yours.

comments

georgerussell mate leave something for us

alex_albon what I am supposed to do rn, lily won't let me in to our apartment

charlesleclerc gentelmen we are so finished

landonorris die lol 👎

oscarpiastri yk that they can see you crying, right?

y/njazzy my one and only ❤️

user can somebody check on user5

user5 I KNEW I WAS NOT CRAZY

user5 PARENTS ARE REALLY BACK TOGETHER

y/njazzy

liked by carlossainz55, reyesvdec and 171,729,819 more

y/njazzy the only ex i would ever come back to 💋💋💋

comments

alexandrasaintmleux finally the ferrari girls are reunited

y/njazzy not for too long

alexandrasaintmleux foul

charlesleclerc too soon y/n, too soon

maxverstappen i won't even ask about the last pic

carlossainz55 the less you know the better you sleep

landonorris i cannot belive this is happening

y/njazzy sucks to suck ig

carlossainz55 only ex i couldn't move on from 🫶🫶🫶

y/njazzy you flatter me

user1 the difference in the capitions pls ✋️

[shadykazama]

Hello! Your headcanons on Wukong/Destined One had me giggling so much 😊 they're so great, couldn't stop rereading.

Um, if it's alright, can I ask for some Wukong/Destined One x Reader with their baby? Feral daddy monkey in his nesting phase with his mate and baby is so— 🤭

Absolutely! I have a lot of thoughts and the people demand more monkey business- so let's get down to it.

❤ Wukong

Starting with the pregnancy~

He is ELATED.

The idea of a proper heir had never crossed his mind because well- he's immortal. He doesn't need one. But that doesn't mean the idea of his own flesh and blood isn't positively exciting.

There's a chance he knows you're pregnant before you do. What with all of his special powers and heightened senses.

Celebrates privately with you of course but it becomes a mountain-wide event very quickly.

You are showered with praise and blessings by all the monkeys.

He will never miss a chance to brag that he's going to have a baby. And he's definitely smug about it too, thinks your child is going to surpass even his power.

When you start showing he gets more smothering.

Don't forget our king's fatal flaw! He thinks he knows what's best.

Will limit how much you travel and makes sure you always have at least two attendants by your side while he's gone.

Which, once you get further along, isn't often. There were plenty of superstitions about pregnancy in ancient China, as well as a high infant mortality rate- and that's not even counting what complications could happen due to the magical nature of your child. So he'd be stressed.

He expresses stress through aggression (canon), though it's never pointed at you. He'd be fiercely protective over the mountain, but especially any of the areas you regularly stay in. He'd be very snappy at everyone for the entire second half of the pregnancy, except you of course, who he'd be showering with praise and reverence.

Likes holding your stomach while you rest and tells your baby about the great lineage they're being born into, recounting his titles and strength and promising them they'd be greater.

He's hoping for a boy, but he's assured his child will be spectacular regardless of the gender.

When you give birth he will be extremely focused. He can't afford to be weak in a moment when you need him most. (Though your cries of pain and effort will certainly make his heart ache.)

As you're holding your baby for the first time, his teasing, smug attitude is nowhere to be seen. He just looks at you as if you'd given him the universe itself.

Cutest baby ever might I add 👆.

It's a Chinese tradition that only immediate family is allowed to meet the baby for the first 100 days after it's born, so it'd just be you and him for a majority of three months unless you invite your family to meet them.

In traditional fashion, on the 100th day a banquet is held to officially introduce the baby to everyone. And MY GOD would it be an event...

Besides all of the monkeys on the mountain who want to celebrate their new prince/princess, I can't even imagine how many celestials and demons would come to pay their respects and blessings- be it out of fear or respect.

Either way, expect a very long day and a LOT of gifts.

^ Wukong doesn't leave your side for the entire day. I dare someone to try and pull something.

You'd expect with his trickster personality that he'd be a very lenient dad, but Wukong is surprisingly dutiful in making sure your child doesn't turn out lazy or ignorant.

That by no means is to say he wouldn't be a wonderfully playful father. He'd have a wonderful connection with his child, and his most important lesson to them would be to respect their mother ;)

More of a one kid kind of guy, so he'd probably stop after the first, unless you had twins or triplets.

As protective as he was with you when you were pregnant, he's pretty chill with the actual kid. He knows they're durable and will let them get roughed up doing dumb stuff.

Carries them around hanging off his tail and will pretend like he doesn't know where they went.

It's like how cats will let their babies 'sneak up on them' to encourage them to keep trying. He does the same thing with your kid when they try to trick him.

Your baby would be the most respectful little shit ever. A little shit nonetheless, but would do anything for you or their father.

All the monkeys on the mountain help keep an eye on the little sage so you'll never feel lost or alone in parenting. It's very much a joined effort and your baby will see the other monkeys as their family as well!

This wonderful piece of Sun Wukong was done by @kanade-howl here on tumblr! They post their work on Twitter as well at @kanaade_ and @_liehuzuo please support them!

💙 The Destined One

Give him a bunch of babies I beg you.

He'd get addicted, he wants a big family for SURE.

When you first tell him you're pregnant he'll probably take some time to fully soak it in.

You'll be used to being patient with him at this point, but I imagine something like this is really nerve wracking so don't feel bad if you rush him for a response.

He'll put a hand on your stomach as if he's checking for himself before picking you up and smothering you with love.

He's not a chatty guy but he'll let you know how happy he is!

^ That being said, during your pregnancies is the most talkative he'll ever be.

He doesn't want you to stress about communicating and knows your body is going through a lot so he pushes himself to talk more to make sure you get everything you need.

That doesn't mean he'll be a chatterbox by any means. More than nothing is still very slim :')

Expect a lot of one word questions.

Trusts you more than he trusts his own instincts. His instincts tell him you shouldn't be climbing or moving around much- but if you want to, who's he to tell you what to do? He's not the one pregnant 🤷‍♀️

Follows you around like a guard dog when you do though, doesn't matter what you're doing.

Somehow even more physically affectionate than normal. Will insist on holding your hand when you walk so you can lean your weight on him.

When you start showing he'll be amazed. It's not that he's never seen a pregnant person before but like... That's his baby in there and he can't believe it.

His favorite thing to do is lay his head against your stomach while you're resting. Will kiss your skin and adore the life you're making.

You can catch him whispering things to your baby while he's resting his head on your stomach.

Your body is going to ache and he is more than happy to massage it for you. He doesn't even need an excuse to touch you, but he'll find them anyway.

Once you get further along and it gets harder for you to get around, he'll pick you up and take your wherever you want to go- within reasonable distance from your home of course. Not because he can't take you further, he just doesn't want to in case something happens.

But he wants to make sure you get fresh air and still see the beauty outside of your bed.

Doesn't trust anyone to watch you. It's him or nothing.

Makes offerings and prays to the goddess of childbirth. He does this a few times before you catch him and start helping.

He's a bundle of nerves when you're giving birth. If you weren't preoccupied, it'd probably be painfully obvious how nervous he was.

Holds you while you hold your baby and will not stop telling you how much he loves you and how perfect the baby is.

Gets baby fever bad.

Baby will be spoiled, and so will any other baby after that.

Huge advocate for carrying the baby. If you're not opposed to it, he probably carries them more than you.

Has the most deadpan look on his face as he looks at this baby but he has so much adoration for his little miracle.

Stressing over your baby crying in the middle of the night? Not with him! He's at that babies beck and call.

Watching a nearly mute man deal with a curious child is definitely amusing and you get a front row seat.

Your children kind of just accept that their dad doesn't talk much, but he'll always tell them he loves them if they say it to him.

Takes them everywhere with him so he can teach them. Is SO proud when the oldest starts helping teach the younger ones.

He's proud of them in general honestly.

Your kids are going to be super loving and curious. I think he'd foster really healthy relationships between all of them.

You'd have a whole team taking care of you if you ever got sick.

[solaireverie]

sv5 | that lavender haze

summary: [ florist!sebastian vettel x f!driver!reader — social media au ] your florist husband spoils you with his creations

faceclaim: phoebe tonkin

author’s note: seb the love of my life <3

[ masterlist / guidelines / lola's masterlist / series masterlist ]

liked by sebastianvettel, lewishamilton, mercedesamgf1 and 35,201,234 others

yourusername catching the waves 🏄🏻‍♀️

view comments

sebastianvettel Ich liebe dich 🥰

↪ yourusername can't wait to be home with you again 💗

ausgp can we keep you down under please? 🦘

↪ f1mia back off 🦅🇺🇸

user mother AND mommy omg

mickschumacher can you teach me how to surf instead 🙏 lewishamilton doesn't understand that not everyone is naturally talented at everything

↪ lewishamilton i don't know what to tell you, mate 😂 keep calm and keep your balance, it's all chill

↪ mickschumacher easy for you to say 🙄 you're not the one drinking seawater every five minutes

yourusername has added to their story

liked by yourusername, mickschumacher, charles_leclerc and 124,129 others

tagged: yourusername

sebastianvettel Welcome home yourusername ❤️ the flowers missed you and so did I 😉

view comments

user i love how y/n's husband's instagram is basically just a fanpage for her 😂

↪ user nah you can't forget the flowers ‼️

↪ user seb loves two things in life and they're his flowers and his wife 😌

user i don't even go here but i'm all for the golden retriever and black cat vibes 🤭

mickschumacher seb i have a bee problem in my backyard...

↪ charles_leclerc you know you could just text him right 🙃

↪ mickschumacher he checks his phone once every three months if your name isn't y/n l/n-vettel 💀

↪ sebastianvettel and I'm not ashamed of it 😄 but what can I help you with?

↪ mickschumacher a colony of bees moved into my garden 😅 i don't mind them but is there anything i should watch out for?

↪ sebastianvettel As long as they're not being overly aggressive you shouldn't have any problems 👍 keep me updated though

↪ mickschumacher thanks seb you're a lifesaver 😊

yourusername thanks for the flowers schatz 😘

↪ user ugh they're so Parents 😭

liked by charles_leclerc

↪ user charles liked your comment 😂 i guess even the drivers agree

↪ landonorris you didn't hear it from me but seb and y/n are the unofficial official grid parents

liked by mickschumacher, lewishamilton, yourusername, and 23,109,234 others

tagged: sebastianvettel

mercedesamgf1 We have a special guest this weekend at the #JapaneseGP 🐝 sebastianvettel is here at Suzuka to promote biodiversity and build some bee hotels with the drivers 💪

view comments

charles_leclerc Appreciated the art tips 😉

user this man 😭 "what do you think about this weekend's race?" "well obviously my wife is going to win everything"

↪ user as he should honestly

↪ user when you're in a "being a wife guy" competition and your opponent is sebastian vettel 💀

kevinmagnussen Thanks a lot Seb 😂 the kids want beehives now!

↪ sebastianvettel Glad to know that someone was listening when I was giving my talk about the role that bees play in our ecosystem 😔

↪ landonorris in my defence someone brought cookies and i was hungry...

↪ sebastianvettel you are 24 years old, Lando

↪ user why can i feel seb's disappointment through an instagram comment 😭

yourusername sometimes i wonder if he'd leave me for his bees 😂

↪ lewishamilton don't worry, you can crash on my couch if he does. roscoe needs a permanent babysitter

↪ yourusername two decades of friendship and that's all you see me as?

↪ lewishamilton let me by during the grand prix and i'll think about it

↪ yourusername mercedesamgf1 i'm telling toto

↪ sebastianvettel I would never leave you for bees, liebling. Clean energy, on the other hand...

liked by sebastianvettel, lewishamilton, susie_wolff and 132,293,402 others

tagged: sebastianvettel

yourusername Happy anniversary, my love 💐 12 years and counting

view comments

user the bouquet emoji because he's a florist omg 🥹

user my favorite thing ever is how 5-time wdc y/n l/n-vettel's husband is Just Some Guy who's completely smitten with his wife and makes her all the bouquets she could ever want 😭

↪ user they're like cottagecore addams 😩 i adore them so much

↪ user COTTAGECORE ADDAMS HELP 🤣🤣🤣

susie_wolff Congratulations and our best wishes!

↪ yourusername thank you ❤️😊 the same to you and toto!

sebastianvettel I'm the luckiest man in the world to be able to call you my wife and partner 💗 You're P1 forever, especially in my heart

likes and reblogs are appreciated!

taglist: @scenesofobx @vellicora @boiohboii @julesbabey @flannelforthetoads @misartymis

[cutielando]

Heyy, im not sure if you're doing requests or socmed au's,,But if you are... I was wondering if you could do a socmed au with max verstappen in which he's secretly dating a nurse or a med student; where he likes meets her on vacation in croatia where she's studying; she sings in a klapa (a traditional acapella group) and he ends up at one of her performances, and there is like media coverage on how he was seen with an unknown girl,,, they keep their relationship secret until some gossip site gets pics of them together infront of the hospital with her in uniform and they soft launch after that

i know this is like a bit detailed, but i CAN NOT write for the sake of all that is holy

Anyways... Absolutely LOVE your writing❤

loving a nurse | m.v.

my masterlist

Instagram

liked by yourbff, yourbrother and 391 others

yourusername a little time away from the hospital🦋

📍Split, Croatia

view all 16 comments

yourbff i forgot what time off felt like😩

yourusername you and me both😭

yourbrother what's with that swimsuit????😯

yourusername i don't know what you mean

yourbrother you make it so hard to be nice to you

yourusername i know, but you love me regardless

friend1 you look so good!!!❤️ hope you enjoy your vacation!!

yourusername thank you babe!!!❤️

friend2 how does it feel to finally breathe outside of the hospital 🥲🥲

yourusername i kinda miss it, to be honest 😂

yourbff don’t listen to her, she’s drowning in mimosas

yourusername don’t out me

liked by landonorris, alex_albon and 483,175 others

maxverstappen1 summer break has never felt so good

📍Split, Croatia

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landonorris i bet you're enjoying it more than we are ;)

maxverstappen1 shut your mouth

landonorris don't hate me for speaking the truth

maxverstappen1 shut up

alex_albon getting some extra sun in there, maxie boy

maxverstappen1 you're a menace💀

alex_albon i’m speaking the truth 👍🏻

redbullracing hope you have a wonderful break, champ!❤️ you deserve it!! liked by maxverstappen1

user1 he looks so good, Jesus😩😩

user2 why are lando and alex teasing him in the comments???😭

user3 they're probably just trying to embarrass him because he never posts topless pics or something lol

user2 or maybe he met someone while in Croatia??

user3 possible, yeah

georgerussell63 I see you've taken a page from my book on that first photo there ;)

maxverstappen1 i have to learn from the very best😂😂

georgerussell63 you’re doing good for your first time

charles_leclerc where did you disappear last night?

maxverstappen1 i didn’t?

charles_leclerc bro, nobody could find you for hours

landonorris he was up to no good, charlie :))

maxverstappen1 i’ll block you

user4 i wanna live his life so badly 😭😭

user5 same🥲imagine being him

user6 he’s glowing ever since he ended it with Kelly

user4 that bitch was milking the life out of him. he seems to be doing well now

liked by formula1wags, racingforever and 12,184 others

formula1gossip Max Verstappen was spotted at a klapa music night last night in Croatia where he's currently on vacation. Moreso, he was spotted having dinner with one of the members of the group. Is there something going on in the World Champion's love life, so far away from home?

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user1 MAX???

user2 this is the most Max thing he could ever do

user3 kinda wish this was true, he needs someone after the whole Kelly drama

formula1wags detective mode activated

user4 doing God's work, thank you admin

charles_leclerc so that’s where he was

user5 hahahahaha CHARLES

liked by maxverstappen1, yourbff and 415 others

yourusername back to work 🩺

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maxverstappen1 nobody can pull off wearing scrubs like you do🫶🏻

yourusername staaaaawp

yourusername who gave you permission to be this sweet???😭

yourbff what about me?

maxverstappen1 i only have eyes for Y/N

yourusername atta boy 😊

yourbrother i don’t like all of this flirting in the comments 😒

yourusername okay

yourbrother did you hear what i said??

yourusername no, i read it

yourbrother stop being a smartass

yourusername never 😋😋

charles_leclerc glad to see the mystery girl has a name

maxverstappen1 stay away

charles_leclerc calm down

yourusername baby, be nice

charles_leclerc yes baby, be nice

liked by formula1wags, maxiesbaby and 11,482 others

formula1gossipp Is Max Verstappen off the market? The reigning F1 champion was seen outside the hospital getting cozy with a nurse. We can confirm Max was NOT a patient at the hospital, seemingly only spending a few minutes with her before he departed and she rushed back into the emergency room. Is our World Champion officially a taken man?

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user1 no way he bagged a nurse😂

user2 even though this is an incredible invasion of his privacy, if this is true then i'm so happy for him🙏🏻

user3 i hope they're together, whoever she is☺️

user4 finally, we're free of kelly

user5 i honestly thought he wouldn’t get away from her 🥲🥲

iMessage

maxie💙

i'm sorry..

y/n🩷

?????

what happened?

maxie💙

there were some paparazzi at the hospital last night, they took some pictures of us and posted them online

they can't see your face

but they definitely know it was me

y/n🩷

babe

it's okay

it was bound to happen eventually

maxie💙

i don't want you to lose your privacy because of me

you need to focus on your studies

not deal with this

y/n🩷

babe

i knew what i was getting myself into when we started dating

i'm almost finished with my studies

nobody is distracting me from anything

don't worry, i'm good

maxie💙

so we can tell the world about us?

y/n🩷

if you want, then yes

maxie💙

i want everyone to know i have the hottest and smartest girl😮‍💨

y/n🩷

you’re making me blush

baby

i miss you so much

i can’t wait to join you 😭

maxie💙

not more than me

i’m counting down the days until i see you 💙

Instagram

liked by yourusername, landonorris and 2,194,573 others

maxverstappen1 yes, the rumors are true. i have a girlfriend, and she is indeed a nurse at the local hospital in Croatia. we decided to keep the relationship to ourselves because i didn't want her privacy taken away from her, or her focus shifted from her studies. i wish we could have had the opportunity of announcing this on our own terms, but the paparazzi got the best of us this time. i urge you all to be respectful towards her, any hate towards her will absolutely not be tolerated by me or anyone from my team. i hope you will come to love and respect her as much as i do

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[russellsppttemplates]

hi chat 😊😊😊 I was wondering if u could write a piece with Lando where the reader just normally shakes and always is fidgety. Self indulgent but I thought it would be really cute how Lando never let go of her hand and constantly ask her if she was good

"Here, baby, hold my hand", Lando urged you to lace your fingers in his as you walked along the paddock.

He had grown used to it so much so that he didn't have to think about it anymore - any chance he could, his hands were on yours and playing with your fingers whenever the time was right.

"Do you have any plans?", he asked as you walked to the hospitality entrance.

"I have some stuff from work to finish, but I'll be able to watch the practice sessions", you smiled, squeezing his hand before finding a spot on the tables once you were inside.

.

"Are you okay, my love? You're shakier than usual", Lando pointed out in a low voice once you sat down at the table.

"There's a lot of people I don't know here, and I feel like their eyes are on me", you mumbled, looking at the elegantly dressed women and men in the room. McLaren's gala dinner was in full swing as everyone found their seats at the tables.

"Of course they're looking at you", Lando added, "they're trying to find out how you can be so beautiful, so charming, so incredible", he kissed your knuckles with each compliment.

"Highly doubt that", you mused.

"Okay, if they're not looking at you because of how stunning you look, then they're looking at me and thinking how did I manage to pull you", he smiled as you playfully shoved his chest, "they're thinking 'how did that muppet pull such a beautiful young woman?', that's what they're thinking".

"You're impossible", you smiled, blushing at his words.

"I can't help myself, especially when you look this gorgeous", he used, holding your hand up to his lips so he could kiss your knuckles.

(Thank you for sending this in ✨️)

[crimsoncandy04]

hii omg out of curiosity... could u do a scara with a bratty virgin reader who teases him too much thinking she can get away with it. if that suits ur tastes that is 😊😊

Of course! I may not fit the entire idea of a brat myself, but I've been told I can act a little cunty now and then so I think I can do this one fairly well.

Scaramouche was just another annoying superior you had to obey. All the harbingers were pretty much the same in the aspect that they viewed YOU as lesser than. Which technically you were by law of Snezhnaya but that wasn't YOUR fault. You were only stuck working as a subordinate for the height deficient harbinger called The Balladeer because your stupid slut mother had gambled away a HUGE loan while she was pregnant with you and instead of taking responsibility, she fled the country and hadn't been seen since you were like 6.

But the fatui weren't just going to forgive a debt that large simply because of a disappearance. No.

A group of fatuus soldiers had knocked on your grandparents door one day, led by Scaramouche. They were given three options.

1: Pay off their daughter's debts.

2: Die.

Or three...

"Give the oldest girl over and have her work it off in her mother's name." Was what the pretty faced yet slick tongued bastard had said.

Your grandparents had recently been put in charge of your half brother too as authorities had taken him from your mother's home due to excessive drug use on her part. He was just a little kid, barely 4. YOU on the other hand were now a young lady. A young adult.

He needed your grandparents.

You had had a wonderful childhood already.

And so you bowed your head and agreed to go back with The Balladeer and his cronies to the fatui headquarters and officially join the ranks.

It wasn't that bad actually. Scaramouche didn't actually seem to care or not if you didn't do your job. But you were clearly the only exception as you often watched him treat others with a cruelty that bordered on ruthlessness.

Not that it was your problem.

You often sauntered into his office late at night to chat with him. Not that he ever stopped you.

"Hey Scara what's up? Ugh you really should get better lighting here. It looks so ominous!" You bitched as you hopped up onto the edge of his rather grand looking desk and looked down at him while he worked.

"Hey let's hang out for a bit! That stuff is just boring work things anyway! I never do mine!"

He grunts.

"I know."

You pouted as you tried to scoot a little closer to him.

"ugh you're so lame today! And here I thought a harbinger as mighty as yourself could multi-task easily! It appears I was mistaken!"

Scaramouche rolled his eyes at your behavior.

"leave. I'm busy right now."

You were feeling agitated now.

"no! I've been waiting all day to hang out and now you're ignoring me!?" You turn completely around so your legs fell over on his side of the desk now. Crossing my arms as I stubbornly stand my ground.

"I'm not moving until you at least look at me you stupid meanie!" You whined.

The pen in Scaramouche's hands suddenly snapped in half. Ink splashing across the tabletop caught your attention.

"I said leave."

"make me!* You stick out your tongue and pout even more at his tone.

"it's not like you're actually gonna punish me for being here like anyone else! Stop being such a big meanie!"

Suddenly his hand was around your throat.

"Is that what you tell yourself bitch? How amusing." He squeezed your neck. Just enough to make you dizzy as you felt Scaramouche rip open the front of your buttoned white blouse.

His eyes quickly looked you over with a predatory hunger.

"you're alright I guess. For a human anyway. You'll do."

You squeak in terror as he tears off your bra next. Gently running his fingertips across your nipples and causing them to harden. as your breath hitches in your throat, you feel an unfamiliar warmth in your panties at the sensation.

He then shoved you back onto the table top.

"h-hey what are you doing? Stop this at once!" You squeak anxiously. Being almost frozen in fear as you feel Scaramouche roughly lift up your shirt and expose your panties to his smug looking gaze.

"what? Not so tough now that you finally realize how insignificant you are?"

He traces the outline of your wet slit through the dampened fabric.

"how pathetic. Acting all bold and yet you're already shaking and getting excited before I've even touched you."

Scaramouche easily tears away the delicate fabric as he spreads your knees wide for him. He kneels down and closely takes in the sight of your exposed sex. Gently pulling your folds open to give him a better look at you.

You feel his cool breath against your inner labia as you begin to tremble.

Finally something clicks for him.

"oh? I see you've never been had yet. It's almost funny Y/N, at your age? Seriously? What?"

He pinched your clit softly

"too shy?" His raspy tone bordered on a seductive growl as you feel him rub little circles on your pleasure nub.

"ugh it's not like I haven't had chances before! I just didn't care for anyone enough to want to do that stuff!"

Your words were met with a jeering cackle as Scaramouche simply sighed and slowly began to ease two fingers into your unbroken entrance.

A strong ache filled your body as you moaned softly and saw blood drip onto his palm as you struggled to raise your head and see what he was doing at first.

Immediately he shoved your head back down and kept a firm grasp on your throat.

"stay still sweetheart. If you don't relax, it's going to be excruciating."

You felt him begin to slowly start thrusting his fingers in and out of your tight pussy. Successfully popping your cherry as you blushed deeply and tried to muffle your cries using your hands.

He leans down and gives your clit a gentle lick next. Teasing you now as you whimper at the new feeling. More warmth filling your lower abdomen as you feel your legs tremble while Scaramouche continued to lap at your untouched bud. Deliberately trying to draw out the strange rising feeling in your tummy. You cry a little as you finally dare speak.

"Please... stop this... I'll pee!" You wail pitifully as his eyes took on a seductive look.

"That's not what's about to happen sweetie ~ don't worry, you're about to feel really good, I promise ~"

He released your upper body and began to focus more on stimulating your tight cunt as he fingered your sensitive walls and continued to gently suck on your clit. Giving it a little bite now and then that made your legs tremble.

Finally you feel your lower abdomen tighten. Your insides pulse as you feel yourself squirt. Scaramouche swallows every drop almost eagerly as he continues to tongue fuck you through your orgasm.

Only when you lay breathless and exhausted upon the table before him, does he finally free his rather large cock from the confines of his shorts, pressing the tip teasingly at your entrance.

"You were all bark just an hour ago bitch. Now you're just a whimpering mess. What happened?"

You felt Scaramouche slide his dick into your pussy then. The thickness stretching you beyond capacity as you wince and feel yourself whine a little.

"Do you realize your place now cunt? Maybe this will teach you to talk with a little more respect towards your superiors."

He began to slowly thrust into you then. Your oversensitive cunt spasming with every thrust as you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist.

Scaramouche leaned down to steal a kiss too. Shoving his tongue into your mouth as you held onto him. Swallowing up your cute and girlish moans of pleasure and pain as you dug your nails into his back and felt him quicken his pace.

He fucked against your cervix as he continued to press your knees upwards more as he got closer to finishing. Bringing your knees practically beside your head as he got a little rougher then. Forcing you into a sick mating press position as he claimed your virgin womb for himself.

Scaramouche groaned and bit your bottom lip a little as you felt him pour his hot seed into you after what felt like the longest hour of your life. His sadistic smirk widened as he pulled out of your bloody cum filled cunt.

"This will be your new job from now on. Don't bother refusing. You still owe me a debt. " He stuck his fingers in your dripping depths again.

"however, keep being as obedient as you were tonight and this sweet cunt might just pay it off sooner than you think."

[mayearies]

… ꒰ঌ ໒꒱

.. ❛ nailed it ❜

genre: suggestive | warnings: implied making out, suggestive speech ->summary: miles gives you a prize

꒰ঌ a/n ໒꒱ needed to spice up shi a little bit since i havent in a while lmao i didnt feel like adding pictures to this one (ty @/q2ie for letting me steal ur format 😊 i might not keep it tho LMAO)

miles and you were doin' your nightly routine—facetiming each other for 3 hours before you actually went to sleep. you two would talk about anything and everything. drama at school, shit at work, etc. but you wanna see him in person. you would drop that in the convo for a while.

"then this bitch down the street was lookin' at me sideways n' shit, i swear to god-" "i wanna come see youuuu"

he broke, bursting out in full on laugher and rolling around in his bed out the frame. all your other attempts landed in him letting out a breathy laugh or a small chuckle.

"okay but no seriously! you haven't came over in foreverrrr" "we saw each other last week, mi vida?" "that's too long! what can i do to make you come over?"

it didn't take him long to think about a possible challenge. the smirk on his face told you all you needed to know. "you can try that one filter goin' around."

"which one? the hammer one?" "yeah." "hmm. you make it seem like it's that big of a challenge." "knowing your timing skills, yes. yes it will be a challenge for you." "what's in it for me?"

miles held his face in his palm while he looked to the side, making a humming noise. "i'll come over and kiss you."

"make out, you mean?" "i mean... it depends if you pass or nah."

you sucked on your teeth as you moved over to tiktok and got ready to win the little prize he had for you. you didn't even tell him that you started. you just went at it. he saw your focused ass self through your camera and he was snickerin a whole lot. "yo, shut up or i swear to god."

miles sat up and took a deep breath before saying in a mocking tone: "yo, shut up or i swear to g-"

"STOP"

once the timer hit zero, you had landed around 14. still bein' salty about not being able to get at least two because of his sabotagin' ass. you mumbled a curse under your breath which he knows for certain was for him. "awww.. you mad, ma? estás molesto conmigo?

"shut up." "you're too cute, i can't." "you didn't even tell me how many i had to get!" "... 15."

you stared at him with unamused which only made him feel amused. you swear, this boy plays too much. but that's one of the reasons you love him. the other reasons? well... that's another story.

"i'm jokin', ma. unlock your window."

once you heard your window slide up, you stopped shaking your leg. you had been waiting a whole 10 minutes. far too long. he came in his prowler pajamas, which was cute and it matched your spiderman one. "took you long enough."

miles held your chin with a playful smirk on his face. tilting it upward a little so he could plant a little kiss on your neck. "y'know. i wonder if you taste as salty as you talk, ma."

"just kiss me already."

and so he did. rather passionate, you would say. he knew everything you liked when he kissed you. what you didn't like, and what you loved. what made your face warm. what made your heart flutter. all of it. it's one of the other reasons you love him.

"i know just how to make your knees weak, amor." "sad but true." "what is that supposed to mean?" "you always make me fold. it hurts my back."

he let out a small giggle while cuddling up under the covers with you. he was proud to be able to tease you so much. even if you might get sick of him. "i love you so much."

"wish i could say the same." "damn. you still got that salty ass mouth after all that? thought i carried all my sweetness over to you. you want me to do it again?"

©hiimayee

[yuyu1024]

Dating app

Pairings: San x Y/N

Genre/tags: stranger to something more

Warning: 🔞 mdni, angst? smut, dirty talk, cursing, pet names (baby and noona), unprotected sex (be safe everyone), small age gap, phone sex?

~~~ [lmk if i miss anything]

Words: 4.9k ish

Disclaimer:

- this story is just made up

- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊

A/N: another San one shot. This one is from my draft from few weeks ago. Just finished it.

Masterlist

----------------------------------------------------

It has been two years since you last dated. Your ex broke your heart and trust in men. Which also affected your self-esteem BIG time.

But here you are now, years later trying. With a little help of technology.

"If you find a match... just swipe right." Your friend tells you while you speak with her through loudspeaker. "But of course, check his profile first and use your instinct."

"But what if... I don't get a match?" You nervously say as you button your pajama top.

"Then no match... you can try again tomorrow... the next day... and then the next day... until you find a matches and pick whoever you want to talk to."

"Talk?" You grab your phone that is laying on top of your bed. "We... need to talk?" You sound nervous

"Girl... of course! How should you know a guy if you don't talk to him?"

"I thought... we just... text...like... like in the beginning..."

"Oh well... if you message someone... and find him okay... you need to tell him your situation.. that you are shy and it takes time for you to receive calls..."

You flop you face down your mattress while sitting on the carpet. "I think guys will find me weird and boring." You mumble.

"For some guys.. maybe... but there are guy who find these things cute or interesting.. so... it's okay."

"You're so nice to me, Unnie."

"I'm helping you... because you are my friend... and you are like a younger sister for me..."

"Thank you!"

"Don't mention it... just stay calm and don't rush... and if you need something to make you brave, take a few shots of soju... knowing you... you might not even open the app tonight." She teases

"You know me so well." You laugh

"Okay... goodluck!"

***

An hour later after scrolling through the app. Swiping left more than you imagine and almost giving up, the notification sound of a DM made you almost drop your phone on your face.

"Shit!" You hiss as you see the red dot on the corner of your phone. Contemplating if you'll read it or not.

But then you saw his profile picture. "Fuck it! I'll read it!" You say. Or should we say its the soju that's talking.

🖤: hi

And after you read his message, a new message comes in.

🖤: how's your day?

"He's asking about my day?" You wonder. "Hmm... atleast his not asking for nudes or anything." You chuckle at your remark

💖: my day was hectic but survived it.

💖: you?

He reads it immediately

🖤: not that great.

🖤: but I did go to the gym to workout

🖤: i feel a little better

You pause after you read his message and click on his profile.

"Ohhh... he's... younger than me." You mumble

🖤: did that make you check my profile?

"Shit."

You try to type an excuse so he would not think that you are one thirsty ass woman

🖤: don't worry. I won't judge you.

You sigh as you read his message. "Let's just be honest..."

💖: I checked your profile because I was curious about your age.

🖤: does age matter to you?

💖: i don't think so...

💖: it's just that, I haven't dated a guy who is younger than me.

🖤: hmm, I see.

💖: how about you? does age matter to you?

🖤: no.

Then there is a few second gap between his next message

🖤: I messaged you first remember?

You two messaged each other for a while. You guys talked about simple things only at first. The common questions; favorite food, movie, drinks, places to go, snacks, music and hobbies. It even went on you talking about one guy you tried dating before using the app.

It even sounded that you were ranting to him because of how awful that blind date. That you don't have a choice to go since it was referred by a family friend.

You texted so fucking long that it reached to the point that you don't even noticed the time. Weird enough, you don't even feel sleepy even after taking four shots of soju earlier.

Not gonna lie, you even look excited talking to this stranger all of a sudden.

🖤: are you not tired yet?

"Crap!" You cover you eyes with your pillow. "I talked too much... he must want for me to stop replying..."

💖: oh, sorry. I must be keeping you awake. Sorry for being talkative.

🖤: it's okay. I'm not sleepy anyways.

🖤: i'm just worried you wanted to sleep but you try to keep me company.

💖: no... i'm good. :)

🖤: you don't have work tomorrow?

💖: I don't. I'm off tomorrow.

💖: going to a friend's wedding

🖤: i see.

Then you see the dot moving at the bottom of the screen. He is typing but it's taking quite a time.

"What is he typing...?" You murmur, curious

*pings*

🖤: can I please get your number and call you?

You jolt up your bed and gaps "what?!"

This is what your friend is worried about. Your introvert ass and you issues with talking to strangers at phone.

But then come to think of it, you have talked to him for hours now. Like since seven to now almost midnight. And you seem comfortable with him. However he is still a stranger.

Shit. Now you are all over the place! You don't know what to reply

🖤: please?

🖤: i want to hear your voice.

"Crap. Crap. Crap... crap!" You get up from your bed in panic and went to your bathroom to wash your face and then run outside your room, to the kitchen and grab a glass of water. "You are such a weirdo, y/n!" You say to yourself

🖤: you must be panicking coz a stranger is asking for your number

🖤: if you are not comfortable giving it... I understand.

You read his messages as you tap your foot nervously while holding the glass of water on your other hand

"I need to be honest." You tell yourself. "Yeah... I need to.."

💖: I'm so sorry. I not yet comfortable to give it and talk through voice call. We just met.. or should I say, started to connect.

💖: I hope you understand.

💖: and sorry for being weird.

🖤: I understand. :)

🖤: and no... you're not weird.

You put the glass of water on the counter and then melt on the floor as relief rush through your whole body

*ping*

🖤: i'm going to bed now. I have to get up early later. Thank you for accepting my DM and chatting with me. I hope we get to know each other more.

🖤: and also...

🖤: here is my number XX-XXXX-XXX

🖤: call me when you're ready.

****

The next day, you left in the morning to get to your friend's wedding. You had woke up early, dressed up nicely, fixed your hair and put make up on which more than you usually do. However, you missed your alarm! You woke up 15mins after which is a pretty big deal since you are very much slow when it comes to getting ready. Plus the traffic on the way is a cherry on top.

You are just glad you didn't missed seeing her walking down the isle. Or else she will kill you if you missed it.

"Y/n, thank you for coming." Your friend says as you two hug.

"Oh gosh! You're one beautiful bride!" You say as you hug her tightly. "Congrats to the both of you..." you say, smiling to the newly weds

"Unnie said you were late..."

"I was... I didn't expect the traffic on the way here."

"I heard there was an accident... my cousin too almost came late because of it." The groom says

"Oh... that's unfortunate. I hope no one got hurt in that accident."

"Yeah..." you agree

And then as you continue to chat with your friend, her husband and a few other old classmate from college, your phone vibrates from your bag. Someone must've texted you. But you chose not to check it as you are still busy chatting and you think it's not that important anyways. However, a few minutes have passed and it started to vibrate nonstop.

"It might be important. Just answer it... it's fine." One of your friend says

"Ahm... yeah... I am meeting a friend so..." you cautiously explain

"Oh. You're not going to the reception?" The bride ask

"Sorry... there was a conflict in my sched today... I said yes forgetting the time of your wedding..."

"It must be important... it's fine.. atleast you were present in my ceremony..." she smiles and hug you. "Go... we can do another celebration... with our group next time. After I come home from my honeymoon..."

"Sure! I promise I will be there. Congrats again."

After the hugs and goodbyes with everyone, you hurry your way out of the place. The sound of your heels are echoing off the walls because of the marble floor.

You pick up the call while catching your breathe as you go down. "Hello?"

"Finally... you answered." A low, rapsy voice says across the line.

"I'm sorry... I was talking to my friends and the newlyweds."

"Where are you?"

"I'm just about to get out of the hotel."

"Okay." You hear him breathe a smile. "I can't wait to continue what we left off last night."

Fuck. You can feel your cheeks go hot and red as you hear the man across the line. Who would've thought that the guy you were messaging through the dating app last night, the same guy you said you can't give your number yet is actually talking so sexy to you right now. In the middle of the fucking day.

How? What happened last night?

*****(last night)

You read his text. His number.

💖: ok. Thank you for understanding.

💖: goodnight, San.

🖤: goodnight, y/n

That was supposed to be it. Goodnight and goodbye for now.

But then the stupidity in you kicked in or the clumpsy fingers or whatever.

You were trying to save his number in your phone. You were supposed to long press it, copy and paste into your phonebook and save. However you didn't pressed long enough that it actually just tapped it and dialling it. Weird right? That's not how it should be coz it should have a pop up asking you if you want to call.

BUT the dating app... yeah... it just went through

You did end the call one ring in when you realized what just had happened. Nonetheless you stopped it.

💖: sorry.. I didn't mean to dial.

💖: again, goodnight.

Exhaling all the nerves out of your system when you didn't get a reply. Meaning he is asleep and didn't noticed it. Phew!

You then drag yourself back to your bed to actually try to go to sleep since you need to be fresh for tomorrow.

Pillows in place, blanket over you and lampshade off. You close your eyes already and begin to catch your sleep. When all of a sudden your phone rings.

Without opening your eyes, you grab your phone and answer. "Hello?"

"Did I woke you up?"

Your eyes widens as you hear a deep and unfamiliar voice. You check the number and you curse under your breathe when you saw that it's him.

"Do you want me to believe that you just accidentally called me?" He say, sounding like he is glad you did call him. Coz one, he finally got your number and he didn't have to actually wait

"I swear... I didn't... I... I was just... trying to save it. I didn't know how.. Its my first time using this app... s-so..." you stutter as you explain

He breathes a laugh, "it's okay... No need to explain."

You didn't speak after. You are trying to process the situation now.

"Are you uncomfortable hearing me? Or talking to me?"

You shake your head. "No..."

"Then... why are you suddenly quiet..."

"Well... because..."

"Well?"

"You sound hot..." you blurt out.

He releases a very hearty deep laugh. He's caught off guard by your compliment.

"Do I now?" He says, "you're not bad as well... you sound the way I imagined you sound..."

Imagine. He... imagined you?

"Annoying?" You ask

"No... you sound beautiful."

Your cheeks heats up. Fuck. He sounds hot through the texting but damn he sound more hot talking and with his voice.

"I thought you were going to sleep already... w-why did you call?"

"Hmm... I can't help it. I went to the bathroom to shower and then when I get back to my bed... I saw the notification." He pauses for a second and then adds, "my heart fluttered when I knew it was you."

"You're so good at doing this huh..."

"Doing what?"

"This... making my heart skip a beat with your words... and now... your voice and the way you speak."

He chuckles again, "you are way more honest and open talking than texting...I like that." He says, "But baby, I think you're labelling me as someone who goes to this dating app and flirt with everyone, anyone who replies or DMs me..." he clicks his tongue, "I'm not like that... like you... I'm just new to this. A month ago new."

"Really?"

"I promise."

"How come?"

"I don't know... it's not my thing."

"Then what made you do it?"

"Hmm..." you hear shuffling across the call. He probaby went to bed or moved around his bed. "A friend told me to try... he got tired of being my wingman."

Now its you who is chuckling. "My friend too... that's why I opened an account earlier."

"Interesting..." he breathes, "what are you doing now?"

"Laying in bed..."

"And...?"

"Talking to you..."

"That's it?"

"Yeah...why? what else am I supposed to do..?"

"You're adorable." He smiles

"Hmm... you?" You innocently ask

He was silent for a few seconds. "What answer you want to hear?"

"W-what? I don't... understand..."

Then while you wait for his answer, you hear his breathing change. He took a deep breathe and it sound shaky.

"I can be honest with you... but baby... I don't want to scare you away..."

Your head begins to spin by a weird thought that popped in your brain.

"What is it?"

"Do you really want to know?" His voice went an octave lower.

"Yes..."

His lips curves into a smile, pleased that you said yes. "I'm actually... touching myself... more specifically... I'm pumping my dick."

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!

"W-why?" You can't hide the shakiness in your breathe. It's not that you are flabbergasted by what he is doing and him telling you for real. But, you are being affected.

It's been two years since you dated. Meaning its also been that long since you had a dick in you. And this... him, San, talking to you like this and describing you what he's doing is making something purr under those white panties that you are wearing.

"What you mean why?" He asks, realing you back from your thoughts. "I am talking to you... and your voice is turning me on."

"Don't be silly..."

"I'm not... I can let you hear it if you want... or maybe... show you if you don't believe me..." the way he said those words sounds very teasing and tempting. "You're suddenly quiet... c'mon tell me what you want... I don't mind."

Pressing your thighs together whilst bitting your lower lip, you try to think before you speak. You need to be rational with this. You just fucking met this guy through a dating app hours ago and he's already offering you to see him touch himself or atleast make you hear it.

It's wrong. Very wrong. But...

"Ughhh...." he groans. You can hear him take quick breathes and fight a moan through his lips.

"Are you close?" You ask. Your voice is almost a whisper

"No... not yet..."

"Does it feel good though?"

"Yeah... but I probably will come sooner if..."

"If what?"

"If we both do it..."

Squirming under your blanket, you are very tempted. You can already feel a pool building up in your core by just the way he speaks to you now. You are that dry in that department.

"Y/n... are you touching yourself?" He asks

"Hmmm..." you hum as you're so shy to answer.

"What are you touching..? Don't be shy... tell me..."

Your mouth opens to speak but a needy groan escapes your lips. "I'm...nnnghhh... my tits..."

"Are your nipples hard?"

"Ngghhh... yeah..."

"Fuck..." he hisses. "You sound so sexy... so needy..."

"Ahhh..." you turn to your side, squeazing your tits with one hand while your hand is still holding on the the phone

"Put it on loud speaker baby... please yourself...and listen to how my dick sounds like... wet with pre cum and imagine it... pounding you..."

What the fuck is going on... this started sweet and casual talk only but then just as when the clock strikes midnight, you are now phone sexing with a stranger.

"Are you wet already?"

"V-very..." you breathe as your fingers are now in your panties and circling slow and sensually over your clit. "I'm not good at this... I don't know if I can make myself cum..."

"Do you want my help?"

"How...?"

"Let's meet... not now but... maybe tomorrow? If you are okay with it."

And fuck, you agreed.

****(Present)

"Found you."

You yelp as you hear his whisper from behind you. Almost dropping your phone in the process.

"You scared me!" You say, hands on your chest

Looking up to see, to finally see the guy you just had phone sex or whatever it is called last night, is actually standing in front of you now.

He is wearing a all black fit shirt underneath his cool looking brown leather jacket. And damn, he looks fine as hell. He already looked handsome in his profile picture and a few headshots in the dating app but in real life? His shoulder is wide, he is taller than you, his plump pinkish lips, his beautiful freckles and his voice. He's not human. He is more of a goddess.

"Sorry... I didn't mean to scare you." He puts down his phone and slid it in his pocket which you mimic. "How's the wedding?"

"It was amazing..." you answer, "almost didn't make it but... I ran as fast as I could."

He frowns and then looks at your shoes, "In those heels?"

You glance at your feet and then raise your gaze to his face. He looks not pleased but then with a hint of worry. "Yeah..."

"Is your feet fine?" He then goes down on his knees and suddenly touches one of your feet. You panic and get embarassed.

"Hey... what are you doing?" You hiss, holding onto his shoulder, tapping. You are asking him to get up. "Please... get up..."

"Why are you being acting funny?" He smiles

"Funny? Me? No!" You turn your back on him and start walking ahead.

"Baby," he calls and then holding on to your forearm, stopping you from walking. "Where are you going? That's not the way to where we agreed to go..."

"Oh..."

He is smirking. He is enjoying how flustered you are. "You're so adorable..." he mumbles. And then his hand slides down your forearm until it reaches your hands. He locked his fingers with yours as if, that is where it should have been in the first place. "Just follow me... okay?"

"You know... this is very out of character for me..." you quietly say as you two walk. "I usually say no... or run away... from creeps."

"So you think... I'm a creep?" He arches a brow, glancing at you

"A little...." you shyly answer

"Hmm... I understand..." he chuckles. "I acted a little out of character too... you know... masturbating and coming so intensely just from your voice and moans through the phone..."

"San!" You squeal and try to cover his mouth your hands. "Seriously? Why are you saying that so loud?"

He moves away, teasing you as you can't reach his mouth to cover it. "Why are you embarassed of what made you feel good?"

Blushing you look away. A little embarassed. Not because you didn't like what you guys did last night. You enjoyed it so much, thats not queationable. But it's just that, you have never been this open about sensual or sexual things. Even with your exes. Yeah you fuck with them but thats it. No talks like this before or after. Like sex is just a routine. (Also not that you had a handful of exes as well.)

But then look at this stranger, he... he is already doing a complete opposite of all your exes from the beginning to the last. He's very vocal and you are not used to it. Nonetheless, you like. You are just.... shy.

***

"Fuck!" You gasp as he pushes you against the wall and started making out with you like its his last day of living in this world. San is a beast. A hungry beast!

"I'm sorry.... if... we are skipping... a few step... in getting to know each other." He says in between kisses. "I can't help myself... the moment I saw you from afar... I am already drooling..."

"Ughh!" You throw your head back, eyes shut and mouth open as his lips trail down from your jaw, neck and to your collarbone. Whilst his hand is busy squeezing your ass under.

"You can tell me to stop... whenever you feel uncomfortable... okay?" He asks before sucking your skin, leaving a red mark. "Answer me, baby."

Opening your eyes, you see him staring at you with such desire and yearning. "Okay..." your voice is weak already. Nothing even happened yet. You two are just kissing and grinding at each other.

"Good girl..." the satisfide smile on his face, ugh, so hot.

He lifts you up, gripping on your thights, proceeds on carrying you inside his apartment. You arms wrapped around his neck and forehead, leaning onto his.

"We are definitely moving pass the dating stage huh..." you say

"Don't worry, baby. We have time to date... just right now... I cannot wait to please you."

Smiling while bitting your lip, "stop calling me baby. I'm not a child." You playfully tell him

"What do you want me to call you then?" He gently puts you down his bed and goes on to kneel in front of you. "Darling? Honey? Babe?"

You wrinkle your nose, shaking your head. "No..."

"Then what?"

"Hmmm.... noona?"

He raises both eyebrows, looking a bit surprised by your choice. "Is this about our four year gap?" He asks as he removes his jacket off and then throws it somewhere

You shrug your shoulders, "maybe..."

"Okay.... I can call you noona... but in one condition...or a few."

"And what are they?"

"I know we just met... but I don't fuck around baby..." he begins as he slowly lifts your skirt up to your thighs. "Delete the dating app... delete your account... or any fucker who you tried dating you in your phone. Coz...from now on... you are mine... okay?"

He dives his head under your skirt, spreads your legs and went straight to your clothed core and begins to kiss you. Right there, in the middle.

"Oh!" You inhale a sharp hiss as you feel his soft lips touching you.

Chills run up from your spine and your heart starts to beat faster than a horse. This is new and this is thrilling.

"You haven't answered me yet..." he gets up, moves closer to you and take you by your chin. His two fingers lightly touching and making you look up. "You're mine now... got it?"

You open your mouth to speak. "Y-yes..."

A smile spread across his lips and cheeks. "Good..." he leans lower and forward, hovering you. "And I'm yours... noona." He whispers.

Showered by gentle kisses right below your ears and neck is making you go insane. But him calling you noona, with that deep ass voice, you are leaking down there already.

"Kiss me..." you whisper, eyes shut. "Kiss me more..."

Your back is now the bed and he is on top of you. He obeys your wishes while he satisfy his hands with massaging your tits. He is pinching your nipples hard even under that cream blouse you are wearing. He even likes to rub his thumb over it from time to time.

"San..." you say, pulling away your brusied lips from his. "I need you to fuck me now... please?"

"Okay..." he gets up on his knees and then you start to undress as he begins to take his shirt off.

He is ripped. Dang, you hit a jackpot!

"Liking what you are seeing?" He sounds cocky but you don't give a damn.

He can be cocky all he wants coz he is one of God's greatest creation. Especially that thick, throbbing dick. It's perfect. You just know it.

"I don't have condoms with me nor in my bathroom... is it okay?"

"I don't care. Just get in me!" You jump forward at him and crash your lips to his again.

This time, both of you are skimming your hands from all over each other's body. Making sure you both touch every curve and every turn ons to make this session more intense.

"You're so fucking wet." He smirks. He is cupping you down there. "This laced panties need to go..." he then goes to rip it off you. Intense but so fucking sexy. "It's as wet as I imagined it to be..."

"Aahh!" Your mouth drops the second he inserts one digit in.

"This is how fingering works, noona..." he whispers, kissing you by the jaw. Each sound of each kiss echoes into your ears. "Does it feel good?"

"Yes!" Hips starts to move along with his rythm. "Aah!" You squeal as he adds one digit. "San!" You hug him, holding onto him tight. "Please... I need you in me... I want to feel you now..."

Slowly he pulls out his fingers, spreading all your juices over your pussy and then wipe the rest onto his veiny cock.

"Lay down..."

You do as he says and as soon as your head rested on the pillows by the headboard, you spread yourself wide open for him to see you. Everything.

"My little pussy." He says, aligning his length in your entrance. "Fuck... just feeling you by the tip is driving me insane..."

He eases himself in. It burns. But its not a painful burn. It's something you can't describe besides fire, heat, burn or whatever.

"Ngghhhhaaa... holy crap!"

He is pounding you so hard, so strong that the bed, his bed, is actually moving and creaking. His hands are on the headboard, eyes locked in watching you unravel as you reach your turning point.

"San!" You gasp, putting your hands on his chest. "I can't... I can't keep it any longer... aah!" You shut your eyes as you feel something in your stomach, ready to burst. "Aaah! Fuck! It's so good!" You pant.

"Look at me...." he breathe. He is sweating and his ears are so red. "Look at me when you come... I want to see you loose it. Noona... look at me."

Your mouth is open in an O. Taking short and quick breathes as you prepare yourself to let out the loudest moan you've been trying to hold onto all this time.

And then, just a few more dig into you. "S-san..." his name is the only thing you could let out. Your legs and hands are shaking. It felt like you've ran a 15k marathon in a span of 20mins. You are weak as fuck. However, he is not done yet.

Your eyes are barely open but you still manage to watch him go on, reaching for his peak.

"Noona..." he calls, lowering down so he could give you a smooch. "Your moans are music to my ears..." he say. "And you're still tight after all that...?"

You smile weakly and tease him by clenching more causing him to hiss, biting his lip and whimper softly. He sounds cute whimpering, whining for your tightness.

"I'm now close..." he lightly puts his weight on you, hugging you and burying his face on your neck. "Shit...ahh... ahh... ugh!"

Warm liquid coats your walls and fills it to the brim. Like literally. You can feel him pump in you like there's no tomorrow.

"Holy shit." He chuckles as he get ups to look at the mess he did. "I guess... no sleeping in my bed tonight..."

"What?" You get up and saw the pool of cum coming out of you and him. "Oh no... I'm sorry!"

"Sssh...." he pushes the hairs off your face and kisses your lips for reassurance. "No need to worry... a bed is nothing compared to what you gave me..."

"This is so wrong..." you mumble all of a sudden. "I just had sex with you..."

"And?"

You press your thighs together, hiding you exposed pussy from him. "I just can't believe it."

"Do you regret it?"

You look away, shy. "Of course not..."

"Then why do you act like you do?" He kisses you on the cheek, making you look back at him.

"Are we going to be official? Like...go on dates? Like... you know..."

"A couple?"

You nod.

"Like I said... you're mine now. That means... no one can take you but me..." leaning again for a kiss but this time its softer and have a hint of reassurance to it. "You're my noona... my girl."

[leclerc-s]

short n sweet

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maejonesverstappen short n' sweet is officially yours now!!!

i feel extremely lucky that each time i write a new record i learn a little bit more about myself, and can create from that place. the making of short n' sweet was one of the most special, honest, up and down, stupid and fun experiences of my life.

i thought if something was funny enough to make me laugh then maybe it belonged in a song. happy or sad!

thank you to my brilliant talented friends, writers, producers, mixers, engineers, and creative minds that helped me bring this world and these songs to life. not a serious thought was thunk yet somehow they wefre..lol i love you and am so grateful.

i will keep this short n sweet buuuut more soon. go listen now and i hope you love it

tagged: jackantonoff, amyallen, julianbulian, johntheblind, julia michaels, sharp_stick, jeff.gunnell

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maxjonesverstappen yeah fuck me i guess..it's not like i sat with you for hours on the piano while jack was on the phone...

maejonesverstappen i love you 💙 maxjonesverstappen okay 😊😊 love you too 💙

user28 MAE WREN JONES!! YOU ARE INSANE!!

isabellaperez i need someone to inject this album into my veins

maejonesverstappen you're insane actually isabellaperez pot meet kettle

user67 this is insane. someone sedate me.

charles_leclerc so this is what you meant by 'no more depresso up in this bitch'?

maejonesverstappen exactly leclerc!! charles_leclerc to be fair, we do love a good sad song maejonesverstappen yes, mr. i helped write so long, london. we are well aware

user19 oh this album has versatility. i was expecting something like espresso to be the entire album noooo.

user27 the range singers have to go from a pop happy song to a sad depressing song will never fail to amaze me user03 for real!! i could never be a singer because i don't have that in me

rhysjones i don't think max will appreciate his wife posting the 5th picture...

alex_albon this is the man who admitted he would sleep with daniel if given the chance... i don't think he cares georgerussell he's too busy talking about retirement in press conferences to care maxverstappenjones1 i'm very secure in my marriage thank you very much maejonesverstappen i however live in fear he'll dump me for daniel and runaway with him

user75 bed chem is about max verstappen.

user47 you're so right bestie. the blue eyes line gave that shit away

schecoperez it's 6 in the morning. i should not have to deal with his screaming this early...

maejonesverstappen i'm very sorry but i warned you against staying with him. maxjonesverstappen1 i would take offense but it's very true schecoperez as the children say...this is my hell

danieljonesricciardo well that's one way to celebrate your anniversary...

maejonesricciardo don't be bitter because i did it before daphne could. danieljonesricciardo my wife released an album on my birthday!! maejonesricciardo tomato tomahto!

oscarpiastri something tells me these guys didn't listen to the full album

logansargeant i know way too much about their sex life baileywinters PINK FUZZY HANDCUFFS??? landonorris SHE'S INSANE!

user54 someone needs to study mae's brain under a microscope ❤ by penelopetrevino, lewishamilton, jensonbutton and others

mickschumacher god bless his mother's genetics indeed

maejonesverstappen this is why you're my favorite mick mickschuamcher 😊

victoriaverstappen it's certainly something... great album, ignoring the songs about my brother that is.

maejonesverstappen NO! VICTORIA LOOK AWAY! arthur_leclerc bit too late for that mae...

user43 i wonder how daphne's doing...is she clutching her pearls?

user30 is she flabbergasted? user90 PUH-LEASE mrs jones-ricciardo has no room to judge. she's written worse, possibly. user43 you're so right. how could i possibly forget about dress and the moaning user30 OH MY GOD?

kellypiquet amazing album 💫

maejonesverstappen thanks? btw max isn't in this post is that why you didn't like it? maxjonesverstappen1 mae, we've talked about this. pr is not happy when you pick fights with people. user13 oh the lore here goes so deep it's insane zoyatorres dear user13 you have no idea just how deep the lore goes here.

lewis hamilton if i hear another song about max emilian jones-verstappen's dick it will be too soon.

charles leclerc and somehow I'M the one with the long name

natalia ruiz you have three middle names. you DO have a long name charlie

mark webber it's too early for lewis to be talking about dicks

max jones-verstappen you're just jealous because you've never had a song written about you lewis

isabella perez 🤓☝️ that's not true jones-bitchstappen george russell ???

isabella perez according to my research, aka a tiktok deepdive with osc at 2 am, one nicki minaj wrote "you ain't fuck nicki, you fucked nicole body" about one sir lewis hamilton

nico rosberg so that is why he ended his career as one hit wonder xnda

lewis hamilton literally fuck you nico nico rosberg you've tried pierre gasly WHAT THE FUCK? lewis hamilton STOP TELLING PEOPLE I'VE TRIED SLEEPING WITH YOU! THAT'S NOT TRUE!

alex albon HE DATED NICKI MINAJ??

lando norris WHO DATED NICKI? alex albon LEWIS!!

lewis hamilton we were friends!

daphne jones-ricciardo weeeellllll lewis hamilton daphne, don't you dare daphne jones-ricciardo i didn't do anything! lewis hamilton YOU WERE ABOUT TOO!

logan sargeant LEWIS DATED NICKI?

freya vettel this is some wild lore we're uncovering here

ollie bearman i thought he was dating shakira?

dulce perez shakira might just be old news, who the fuck knows with lewis

lewis hamilton am i not allowed to have friends now?

george russell unless you're willing to publicly announce your friendship with nico rosberg again, we'll just assume every woman you talk to is your girlfriend bailey winters at least set some realistic standards george, that's never going to happen.

nico rosberg for the record, we are friends

sebastian vettel eh, are you though? fernando alonso stay out of it homewrecker sebastian vettel mark webber ass kisser jenson button you two belong in a retirement home mark webber why am i always getting dragged into shit?

rowan todd wait, lewis dated nicki?

carlos sainz nicki who? pierre gasly nicki minaj she sings that one song about snakes mae jones-verstappen well it's an innuendo for dicks but yes pierre gasly yeah, you would know all about innuendos wouldn't you? mae jones-verstappen this is why rowan's never written a song about you

rhys jones LEWIS DATED NICKI? WHEN?

isabella perez oh back in like 2018 lewis hamilton STOP SAYING THAT! I DIDN'T DATE HER!

zoya torres awfully defensive for someone who didn't date her

jenson button oh he totally dated her

lewis hamilton YOU'RE NOT HELPING? jenson button i'm supposed to help??

daniel jones-ricciardo caught them kissing in abu dhabi

lewis hamilton STOP!

george russell he's actually screaming from his drivers room. i can hear him.

george russell update: bono just went in there an asked what was wrong and he replied with, 'they're driving me insane bono!' george russell and now kimi is asking what's wrong with him. what do i tell him?? ollie bearman nothing, let him live in delusion that all of you are super cool and not at all dumbasses max jones-verstappen who lied and told him we were cool? ollie bearman the internet

lewis hamilton i hate all of you

isabella perez can't wait to force you to do media with charles. especially those stupid song challenges just to play a nicki song lewis hamilton oh my god, what the hell did i sign up for? carlos sainz your own personal hell

esteban ocon what the fuck is happening?

mick schumacher lore dump or whatever they call it these days

maxjonesverstappen1 and maejonesverstappen posted new stories

mae said this was very cutesy, very demure, whatever that means. ps i think she did in fact kidnap one of daph's cats this guy is literally so out of it that he didn't notice that i sent him an old picture and am literally standing right in front of him. ps yes he is literally asleep. pps this not very demure of him.

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maejonesverstappen taste video is out now 💋

tagged: jennaortega, davemeyers, campbellrohan

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rhysjones be honest, did max flip out when he found out you were kissing jenna?

maejonesverstappen it was more of a 'do you really have to?' with a pout jennaortega it was actually a tantrum rhysjones oh i love you. please stick around to humble max jennaortega of course!

isabellaperez petition to have me star in your next music video?? i'll kiss you too

maxjonesverstappen1 back off perez, that's MY wife jennaortega he told me the same thing maxverstappen1 who invited you? jennaortega your wife did actually

user98 this music video altered my brain chemistry. i'm not even kidding

user41 you're so right for that. someone please get them to star in a movie as lesbian lovers user1 she has more chemistry with jenna then she did with barry. as if she would ever dump max for barry ❤ by maxjonesverstappen1 user52 max being a barry hater is so funny to me but you go babe.

lilymhe can i be in your next video??

maejonesverstappen of course my love 👩🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏼 alex_albon i thought you two would grow out of this maejonesverstappen1 wow alex being a homophobe in 2024, what would lewis think? alex_albon I'M NOT A HOMOPHOBE! i just don't want you stealing my girlfriend lilymhe and yet carmen and i never complain when we third wheel you and george alex_albon i-

user30 the chemistry was insane

user54 RIGHT? i need to see them act as love interests in a movie soon user97 max jones-verstappen would probably die user30 he just hates to see a girlboss (jenna) winning ❤ liked by jennaortega user54 it's because he knows jenna could steal his wife if she wanted too ❤ liked by jennaortega

maxjonesverstappen1 you look great and she's there

jennaortega jealousy is a disease, hope you never get well maxjonesverstappen1 i will not lose my wife to a pipsqueak user42 max is currently in the trenches. not only is this man struggling with a fuckass red bull but he's also on the verge of losing his wife

jensonbutton as the children say, i fear this ate

fernandoalo_oficial i don't think you're using that right lewishamilton he is, you're just annoying fernandoalo_oficial to quote jenson earlier, 'you belong in a retirement home' user27 man what the fuck goes on in their group chat? nicorosberg that's a question i keep asking myself every time i open it up. user50 NICO'S IN THE GROUP CHAT?

user34 they ate and left no crumbs y'all

user40 absolutely devoured the fucking plate user62 i blame mae jones-verstappen and daphne jones-ricciardo for my high expectations of music videos now

danieljonesricciardo okay, this one was insane. i love it

maejonesverstappen thank you kind sir danieljonesricciardo of course kind lady user56 if my relationship with my in-laws isn't like theirs i don't want it.

daphnejonesricciardo you're actually insane for this one

maejonesverstappen thanks i got it from my sister 🩷 daphnejonesricciardo i hate you 🩷

nataliaruiz actually run away with me, we'll raise jules as our own

charles_leclerc what the hell did i do to deserve this? zoyatorres i don't think she needs to tell you what you did freyavettel yeah we were all there oscarpiastri i agree with whatever they say charles_leclerc all of you are banned from our house nataliaruiz no, you aren't, don't listen to a word he says.

liked by maxjonesverstappen1, charles_leclerc, rhysjones and others

maejonesverstappen serena and blair (F1 version)

tagged: nataliaruiz

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nataliaruiz i love you the way charlie loves max

maejonesverstappen which is a lot maxverstappenjones1 this is slander charles_leclerc oh so you don't love me? was that a lie? maxjonesverstappen1 oh my god, you're needier than my cats are charles_leclerc this is why you haven't won a race since spain... maxjonesverstappen1 THIS IS WHY I DON'T LOVE YOU!

user09 ferrari x red bull wags are my favorite

user42 personally i love nat and penny too but there's something special about THE lestappen wife and fiancée being besties user58 it's mae being besties with charles but natalia and max being enemies for me

nataliaruiz i might just fight someone with you over the cars

maejonesverstappen oh i am so in maxjonesverstappen1 mae, we've talked about this, you can't fight anyone charles_leclerc silvia said to take this down nataliaruiz silvia loves me, she did not say that

user57 serena and blair taking on f1 was not on my bingo card this year

rhysjones i've heard we're fighting salty spice??

redbullracing i'm sorry what? rhysjones for legal reasons this is a joke maxjonesverstappen1 i can't believe i have to deal with both of you rhysjones this is all because you chose to marry my sister

isabellaperez there are 206 bones in the human body...

oscarpiastri my sisters follow you on instagram... isabellaperez i regret nothing oscar

zoyatorres i thought we were blair and serena?

maejonesversttapen we're more like peyton and brooke zoyatorres you are so right, no man is worth it logansargeant ??? maxjonesverstappen1 YOU TOO?! zoyatorres she was mine first verstappen maxjonesverstappen1 *jones-verstappen please

user86 the matching bows!!!

user31 they're giving black swan and white swan user50 mae being the white swan has never made more sense to me

vancityreynolds i'll say this serena is much more annoying than the original

maejonesverstappen this is why hugh beat the shit out of you in your movie. vancityreynolds suck it vertically challenged!

user26 tall gf and short gf

maejonesverstappen i prefer the term snack sized maxjonesverstappen1 you're literally married to me. you're not natalia's girlfriend. maejonesverstappen never stop your husband from letting you find the love of your life victoriaverstappen oh she's so right maxjonesverstappen1 STAY OUT OF THIS VICTORIA? user26 damn men can't take a joke these days. so sensitive.. user31 it's because max is losing his wife to someone new everyday.

zoyatorres just so we're clear, i'm invited to this 'fighting of people?' there's someone at the top of my list.

maejonesverstappen of course, that's who we're getting first nataliaruiz absolutely kyle_kirwood room for one more? zoyatorres 100% percent! logansargeant please take this down. charles_leclerc please take this down. maxjonesverstappen1 i'm being told to ask for you to take this down. i actually couldn't care less but for legal purposes, please take this down. zoyatorres no ❤️ maejonesverstappen no ❤️ nataliaruiz no ❤️ kyle_kirwood i meant what i said, so no ❤️

¡taglist!

@burningcupcakefire @arkhammaid @applopie @lorarri @bb-swift @thewannabewriter @mypage-myfandoms @stopeatread @hobiismyhopeu @lilsiz @alessioayla @niniluvsainz @au-ghosttype @six-call @justtprachisblog @nichmeddar @unluckyyoshi @cool-ultra-nerd @kami10471633 @1nt3rnetgf @fernandoswarcrimes @arieltwvdtohamflash @brekkers-whore @natcha888 @camdensreg @mycenterfold @dear-fifi @georgeparisole @dan3avocado @nikfigueiredo @bella-182 @namgification @jensonsonlybutton @weekendlusting @trouble-sistar @lesliiieeeee @leclercsluv @33-81 @theseus-jpg @sarah-thatstings-ann @minmira95 @casperlikej @formulaonebuff @hopenshaw @hwalllllllelujah @doodlehunz @prongsvault @anytimeanywherebitch-blog @hopenshaw

¡leclerc-s speaks! this did not age well…but also because one person asked for this i’m posting it.

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[chiipay]

Hii, how are you? I hope you're doing well. I saw that your requests were open, I was wondering if you could write for Kaiser; A scenario where the Reader and Kaiser fight, he gets angry ignoring and insulting the reader, then she leaves and he must break his pride to get her back. Feel free to ignore this if you don't want to write it. Thanks a lot 😊

AHHH A SECOND REQUEST. TYY I WAS DYING WAITING ANOTHER ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ aand I'm fine ty hbu?? I uhh actually want to do cheater kaiser but i couldn't find any idea of him cheating because of his lore i couldn't possibly see how he cheated on someone.

Shattered.

Kaiser knows that this is going to happen but he never thought it was going to be so soon.

No. It's too soon.

It's just another dumb fight he got with you. He never meant his words. You know that. So why...did you still leave him.?

He just got home after a match with the Ubers. 'fucking Lorenzo.' he was frustrated by getting blocked earlier so his mood wasn't really right on the mind right now. You were just a bit of a coincidence in his ' moody demeanor ' right now.

" Michael? You're back already? "

You were just making dinner in the kitchen hearing a loud thud making you stop whatever you were doing and went to the front door looking at Kaiser who is now hanging his head low.

You tried to reach out for him but he pushes you away while muttering some words you couldn't catch.

"... could you just leave me alone?"

" is something wrong?...you could talk to me y'know?.."

" Shut up- you won't understand. You never will."

"...hey- you could be a bit nicer.."

" yeah yeah acting all mighty up. You're just being annoying. No wonder no one has ever chosen you. At this point you were just so useless that i decided to take you ."

" I-..."

KAISER took you silent as well making him scoff at your silent demeanour and walk passed you leaving you with your own thoughts.

You were speechless. Mostly you would just beat the shit out of him and probably shrugged whatever that came out of his mouth but this time you were just feeling left out. Maybe his words have hit harder than it used to be. Even if it's just a joke he could have been a bit nicer.

Even so you realised that this happened almost every week. Insults, yelling and fighting- why are you still here? The thought of leaving crossed you. Why stay? It's not like you could fix him. no no.. you realised that maybe you weren't what he wished for.

It's better for you to leave.

And you did.

You started to pack your stuff in your duffle bag. You realised that you never had so many things in this place. This room was filled with Kaiser pride and ego. No wonder you get chills whenever you go here.

".. dang- am i that blind?"

You muttered to yourself. You never saw Kaiser red flags nor have you ever tried to find one. You never hated Kaiser. You never even have a reason to.

Kaiser left the bathroom as soon he got out of the shower- with just having his pants on and water dripping down from his hair he looked at you with confusion.

" going somewhere?"

Silent filled the room. Therefore you were still packing your clothes thinking that if you said anything it would just be a waste.

Kaiser walks up to you and stares at you while your hands are doing things. A hand reaches out to yours making your movements stop.

"... don't leave."

" I'm sorry. I think it's for the better."

"it's not."

Kaiser started cornering you beside the bedframe making you feel small.

"...let me go kaiser- I don't think this is working for both of us- i really do wish you could find someone better-.. I thin-"

Your mouth got shut by Kaiser's palm making you look up to him- confused.

"... Don't."

As much as toxic Kaiser is he still couldn't let you go. You have his head down kneeling for you. You were his joy. His one and only- He couldn't see his future with anyone else other than you.

He couldn't let you leave.

Even if it would hurt you... He couldn't just let you leave. Even after death he would hunt your soul. Curse you to be with him even in the afterlife.

"...Micha-"

" Even if you begged me to let you I won't. You can do anything you want to me. Yelling, thrashing, hitting- but don't you EVER think i will let you go. You belong to me. Your soul, body- from the single strand of your hair to your toes belong to me. Even after death, i will make sure you will be stuck beside me."

Therefore, Kaiser will make sure that he will sleep beside you. Night after night. Year after year. Every life. Every death.

You will always end up with him. He will make sure of that.

[scarletwinterxx]

no one's ever had me, not like you - joshua hong imagine

hellooo😊 so uhhhh yea I'm still here HAHAHAh sorry i really can't get this man out of my head and this scenario is so so so so him. hope you enjoyyy🤍

for my other joshua fics, check them here

if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.

(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)

"Dokyeom just sent a text, beach day this weekend?" Joshua asks as he reads the message on his phone, walking towards the sofa where you're currently sitting

"Are we staying the whole weekend or day trip?" you look up at him

"Day trip, Gyu and Cheol has a thing to do the next day. Dokyeom will text the group chat now" Joshua reads the last text before locking his phone and turning his attention to you

"Are we driving together?" he asks

"Yea sure"

"Really?"

"Yeah, you 'drove' me home last time and you've done it plenty times before" you shrug. Usually you'd catch a ride with your other friends to not raise any suspicion, your boyfriend would also drive you every now and then so it wouldn't look like the two of you are avoiding each other.

"You know I'm not keeping us a secret because I'm ashamed or embarrassed or anything like that right?" you tell him, Joshua shoots you a small smile then takes your hand in his

"I know, I would never think that baby"

"I just want our little bubble to last for as long as we can enjoy, the moment they find out about us we will never hear the end of it" you joke

"They're rooting for us" he gives you a tap on the nose, making you scrunch it. The small action melting Joshua's heart, he's already so smitten over you but there are still times he can't believe you're his.

"Guess we're going to the beach"

The weekend comes, a few of your friends and their partners gather for the mini one day vacation. Usually someone takes the initiative to think of an activity or a location then just inform the rest. It's always fun to hangout with everyone.

"How was your date with Shua" Soonyoung asks you, wiggling his brows at you. Dokyeom, who is sitting beside him while cutting the watermelon, looks over at you when he heard the question

"He finally asked you out?"

"What do you mean finally?" Soonyoung was just about to ask but you said it first, Dokyeom looked like he regret saying it but he already slipped and he knows there's no escaping Soonyoung

"He just mentioned a few times he wanted to ask you out, for like coffee or something. I thought at first he meant as a group but then he said no, as in like out on date" he tells the two of you, you fight the smile forming on your face as you hear the story. Wondering what else your boyfriend tell your friends about you.

"So did he?"

"Yeah we got coffee"

"OH MY GOD SO IT WAS A DATE"

You pull on Soonyoung's shirt, making him seat again "Be so loud about it will you"

"You two totally have heart eyes for each other, I'm calling it. You're gonna get married one day"

You don't say anything, just shaking your head at your overly enthusiastic friends. The conversation flows for a while, then Mingyu comes inviting the other guys to ride jetski's

You follow behind the trio, spotting Joshua by the dock already wearing a life vest and holding another one.

The other boys, some with their girlfriends, go on their own jetski's then rides away.

You're happy to watch on the sidelines, you're not really an outdoor person. Joshua is very aware you don't really like staying under the sun for too long but the weather is so nice, looking around he spots you not to far from where he was.

He walks towards you, you see him and shoot him a smile

"You going out there?" you ask, noting your boyfriend's appearance. It really is getting harder and harder to keep this a secret, especially with how he looks right now. He looks more radiant than the sun.

The glasses pushing his semi-wet hair, the blank tank he's wearing underneath the life jacket, and the cute smile you love so much.

He nods at your question then holds out the other life jacket towards you, "Come with me"

"You know I can't swim" you reply, but Shua just smiles at you. Inching closer and closer until he's only about two steps away from you.

You look around for your friends, "They're all busy, look there's Gyu and his girl. It's totally fine. I'm not gonna let you fall in the ocean, baby"

You look at him, he's trying to woo you with his looks. You know he knows just how to make you say yes. He tilts his head sideways cutely, and show you a loopsided smile.

You roll your eyes then take the life jacket from him, "If I fall there, I'm taking you with me"

"Trust me, I will be jumping right behind you"

You walk towards where the jet ski is waiting, Joshua jumps down first then holds his hand out for you to guide you. You settle behind him, holding on his waist tightly. You can feel him laugh, "You're enjoying this aren't you?"

"I enjoy the most when you're with me, my love. Now, hold on real tight"

Then you're off.

And he's right, it is fun. At the beginning you were still to scared to let go, holding on to Shua as tight as you can. Then after a while he can hear you laughing whenever he takes a turn. For a while you just go around and around on the open water.

When you finally go back to the dock, the rest of your friend group are also there. It's past lunch time and you haven't eaten yet. You can hear Dokyeom and Soonyoung talking about food already.

You and Joshua were the last ones to get off, he goes first then waits for you. But unlike when he helped you on, he didn't take your hand this time. Instead you were surprised when you feel his arm go around your waist to hold you and lift you up slightly until you're standing beside him.

You look up at him, blinking like a deer caught in the headlight. The headlight being your two male friends who were watching the whole scene, surprised like you are.

"Uh thanks" you breath out, showing him a tight lipped smile before walking ahead. Meanwhile Joshua doesn't fight the big smile, his eyes disappearing. He watches you catch up with Mingyu and his girlfriend while Soonyoung and Dokyeom looks back and forth between you and him

"Oh my god, look who finally grew the balls to finally make a move"

Joshua shakes his head, then starts to walk.

"I heard you finally asked her out on a date"

"She told you?" He asks back

"Yea, but really? a coffee date? not even a fancy dinner?" Soonyoung prods

"We'll get there, I just want her to be comfortable. And we had fun" Joshua smile unconsciously just thinking about it. Technically the two of you did go out for coffee, then you stayed over at his for movie night. They didn't need to know the rest of the details but you and him didn't really do much watching, you don't even remember what the title of the film was.

When the rest of the boys finally catch up, you all decided on a cute restaurant near the beach. Soonyoung of course shoots you a look when Joshua sits beside you.

The food was good, made even better with the company. All of you were just chatting about life, sharing stories from your past hangouts and everyday lives. Dokyeom and Mingyu were telling a particularly funny story, all of you on the table were laughing so hard you didn't even notice you leaned sideways until your head was resting on Joshua's shoulder.

He didn't notice it either because to him it's a normal thing. He even sat straight and threw his arm behind your chair so you would be more comfortable. You didn't think twice about tucking yourself on his side and smiling up at him, your boyfriend mirroring the action.

You only notice the table going quiet, making you look over and sure enough everyone was looking at the two of you.

"I uh I was just, I had something in my eye. I was asking him to look"

"Yea she had something... in.. her... eye"

Some looked confused while the others looked at you suspiciously. Especially Soonyoung. You just know he's about to bombard you with questions.

When it's time to say goodbye, you all go back to your respective rides. Joshua is talking to Mingyu, walking right ahead of you.

"So.. that little cute moment"

"I did it... unconciously. I was laughing"

"Mhm"

"I was!"

Soonyoung laughs, "It was cute, you two look good together and Joshua's a great guy"

"I know" you pout

"You didn't hear from me, but he likes you. If that's what you're worried about" he tells you, he really is a good friend. He's one of your bestfriend, next to Shua. You've known him for years now and he truly always means well, you trust Soonyoung to always know what is good.

"It wouldn't be awkward if I date our friend?"

"No, why would it be? It'll be cool. Bound to happen anyways, statistically speaking someone from our friend group is bound to end up together. Who knows, we'll plan to go to your wedding next"

You laugh at that, it wasn't impossible technically. It's somewhere in the future. You hope. You wish. You really do pray he's the one you end up with.

"You're smiling" Soonyoung teases you

"Okay okay, gosh. Do more of that and I won't invite you"

"Invite him to what?" the two of you didn't notice Joshua stopped walking with Mingyu to wait for you

"Nothing" you answer

"Your wedding" Soonyoung says at the same time, making you hit him on the side.

Joshua just laughs, but on the inside he's cheering. Just thinking about one day marrying you is enough to put a smile on his face for days. You really are the one for him.

He had to stop himself from pulling you in a hug, so he watches you with a fond smile on his face. The sun setting on the background casting a beautiful shadow on your face and he thinks he can just get down on one knee right here right now.

"Oh god, look at you. You know what, I'm leaving. You two solve this by yourselves" Soonyoung says when he sees Joshua just watching you.

You wave bye to your friend before turning to look back at the man standing beside you

"What?" you ask him,

He shakes his head and just continues on smiling at you.

You narrow your eyes at him, not satisfied with his answer but you let it go. He looked to cute to be mad at anyways.

"Let's go home, shall we. One more second without a kiss and I'll collapse" Joshua says, mentioning for you to walk ahead while he follows

"I can just imagine their reactions when they hear you" you tell him

"They'll get used to it"

"Mhm, they'll finally see you being a simp" you tease him

"Baby, for you I'd be anything. Call me baby, honey, love, boyfie even hubby I don't mind" he teases back

"You are... you know let's just go home"

[spicynoodles789]

Katsuki Bakugo 𖤓 The Wrong Idea

𖤓 Where y/n likes Bakugo, but can’t father the courage to tell him

Cw: Fic + Smau, swearing, a little angst, set in third yearish (I'm so bad with timelines), reader is refereed to as she/ her, happy ending, kinda ooc Ochaco and Bakugo, y/n is kinda a pick me near the end

Notes: I’m sorry to any Bakugo x Ochaco shippers, but she was just the first person who came to mind 😅. Also, this is my first time posting something that’s partially a fic (not a smau), so I hope you all enjoy! 😊

Ochaco and Bakugou have been acting weird. They’d been hanging out together a lot more than usual. Always in either one's dorm, the door closed and almost always silent. 

Normally it wouldn’t bother you. In fact, you’d be happy that the boy you like and your best friend are spending time together…

But they’re so secretive about it. 

Questions are answered with nothing but murmurs of ‘mind your own business’ or complete avoidance of the matter. 

Ochaco knew how much you liked Katsuki. She knew how anxious you were that some other girl would snatch him up. 

And you were so sure that Katsuki felt the same way. That he liked you too. 

But now they were meeting behind closed doors, and you just couldn’t shake that feeling of dread, nor ignore the questions swirling around your head. 

What if this whole time, they’ve been laughing at you?

What if they’re together?

What if they’ve been playing you a fool?

Your gaze drifted to the box on your desk, full of the small notes and letters you found tucked under your dorm room door some mornings. Some were simple little reminders, while others were compliments. Most of the time, the compliments were on things you were insecure about the previous day, voicing your concern to only your close friends. 

But the handwriting didn’t match theirs. It didn’t match the writing of anyone in class. 

But some small part of you was sure that it was Katsuki’s handwriting. You were so sure you could smell the faint traces of his cologne on the paper. 

But if it was him writing those notes, then why is he suddenly being so secretive with Ochaco? 

You couldn’t stand the questions. You couldn’t stand the wondering. 

You stand up from your bed, finally deciding to do something about your inner turmoil. 

The walk to Katsuki’s dorm was agony. Ochaco had said earlier that she was busy at this time, so you knew they would be together. 

As you knocked on the door, you could hear the rustle of fabric and the soft thud of someone's footsteps. As the door opened, and Katsuki’s figure appeared before you, you felt your heart beat faster. Red eyes that normally made you feel flustered, now made you feel ill with a pang of betrayal. Because past those eyes, and into the bedroom, you could see Ochaco sitting guiltily on Katsuki’s bed. 

There was a ringing in your ears as you walked away, blocking out any and all noise as the two called out to you.

He liked you. Katsuki Bakugou liked you. 

You had to pinch yourself to ensure you weren’t dreaming. 

He liked you. 

You still couldn’t believe it. Not even as you're standing in front of his dorm door, knocking on the wood once again. 

You couldn’t hear the soft thump of his footsteps over the beat of your heart. But the tension in the air was thick as Bakugou opened the door, your eyes meeting. 

Just a few hours ago, you’d stormed away from his dorm in anger. But now…

Now you know the truth. 

“Y/n…” Katsuki’s voice was uncharacteristically soft. 

“I got your messages.” You said with the same softness, almost as if it were a mutual understanding between you too. He nodded his head and gestured for you to enter, which you accepted. 

The tension in the room was thick as the door clicked closed behind you. The two of you awkwardly shuffled on the spot, neither one knowing how to start. 

With a sigh, Katsuki spoke. “Look, about before-” 

“I spoke to Ochaco.” But you cut him off, your mouth moving quicker than your brain. “She told me everything.” 

A small grunt escaped from the ash-blonde. “Everything?”

“Everything.”

“Tch. Damn it round cheeks.” You could hear him mutter under his breath. A small silence followed, the repeated notion of either of you not knowing what to say. 

Katsuki’s room was always neat whenever you came over. The idea that he cleaned it just for you made your heart flutter. It was plainly decorated, with the small slither of All Might memorabilia scattered through. You always forget that Katsuki’s love for All Might rivals Midoriyas. He just wasn’t as out and loud about it. 

“I wanted to tell you.” Katsuki’s voice cuts through your thoughts, pulling your attention back to him. “I meant to tell you that I… y’know.” 

“Right.” You nodded, unsure of what to say. You were always so good with your words, but Bakugou seemed to rid you of that skill. He always did. 

“It’s just… I’ve always been focused on one thing, y’know? I’ve always wanted to be the number one hero, it’s the only thing I ever had my mind set on.” His eyes drifted to you. “Then you came along, Y/n, and you just had to complicate things. For the past two damned years, every time you spoke to me or even just looked at me, my mind would go blank and my heart would speed up. I can barely think around you. At night, I can only think of you. You drive me crazy. You’ve been torturing me for the last two years.” As he spoke, he migrated over to the edge of his bed, sitting down and resting his head in his hands. 

“So what you're saying is that I… distract you?” You ask as you carefully sit down next to him. 

“Tch, yeah. A big fucking distraction.” He muttered, but there was no hint of aggression in his tone. 

You swallowed, tilting your head slightly as you looked at Bakugou. “So you went to Ochaco for help. You didn’t know how to tell me, so you got her to help.” 

“Yeah, something like that.” He grunted, his red eyes meeting yours. “Then you had to go ahead and get the wrong idea, thinking we were hooking up or something.” 

“Yeah, not my proudest moment.” You chuckled softly, your posture slouching. 

“You’re such an idiot.” 

“I know.” 

There was another best of comfortable silence, the two of you just enjoying one another’s company. 

“I like you, too.” You said softly, a small pink tinge on your cheeks as your eyes met him once more. 

“I know.” He smirked that same cocky smirk that made your knees weak. “Round Cheeks spilled her guts.” 

You groan and dramatically flop backwards onto the bed. “Of course she did.” 

Katsuki chuckled at your dramatised misery. “I’m surprised you didn’t hear her. She was practically screaming in my ear.”

“Typical Ochaco.” You say as you prop yourself up onto your elbows. “I’ve gotta know. Was it you who's been sliding those notes under my dorm?”

“Tch, of course it was, idiot.” He scoffed, although you swore you could see a pink hue on his cheeks. 

“Thank god. I thought I had a stalker.”

“Yeah right. As if anyone would be dumb enough to stalk you.”

“Hey!” You protest, sitting up properly. “I’m an interesting person. I could have a-”

You were cut off by Katsuki’s lips meeting yours. It was sudden, but gentle. His lips were soft, and you slowly melted into them as your eyes fluttered shut.

When the kiss finally broke, you looked at Katsuki with a dumb grin. 

“What?”

“You kissed me.”

“Tch. Whatever.” 

“You kissed meee!” You teased him, getting close to his face. He put a sweaty palm to your cheek and pushed you away.

“Shut up idiot.”

You giggled and put your hands up in surrender. “Alright alright. But I gotta ask one question: Does this mean we’re dating?” 

After a careful, two second consideration, Katsuki nodded his head. 

“Yeah, sure. Just don’t get the wrong idea, y/n.”

[vagabond-umlaut]

meet you where the sky meets the earth

to love is to listen to your heart, not your brain. to dream whilst in love, is to make your brain listen to your heart.

▸ gojo satoru x fem!reader; former teacher x former student [gojo is six yrs older than reader]; bittersweet fluff; you're so in love w satoru, it shd hurt- but it doesn't because you've grown numb to the ache; one-sided feelings [are they really?]; few mentions of food; gojo calls you 'cookie'; this is way too tender even for me, istg; 1.5k wc

▸ belongs to the series 'you make my heart flutter and fibrillate' but can be read as a stand-alone fic if you wanna! 😊

▸ the header is from pinterest, the dividers are by @benkeibear, the characters used here aren't mine. pls don't plagiarise, translate or repost this. hope y'all enjoy reading this ❤️❤️

the first time you think of marrying gojo, you're only twenty years old.

hardly the age to be dreaming of wedding bells at, right?

yeah, right. that's very, very right— still, your heart is your heart, just how your brain is your brain, the former easily swaying the latter by a few skipped beats— and you find your cheeks growing warm, laughs stumbling past your lips as you place the box of cornflakes into your shopping cart.

gojo sputters from beside you, eyes comically wide behind his shades as they dart from you to the elderly woman before.

you take a second to compose yourself before answering the ask that created this mess in the first place, a polite smile lining your face, "oh, no– not at all, ma'am! we're not married. i'm just an old friend helping him with the groceries, haha."

"oh," that's the only thing the woman says in reaction, kind smile now a tiny frown before it reappears. and she apologises, "i'm sorry, dears. just thought you two to be newlyweds from how giddy and loving you seemed to each other... time i went for an eye check-up, yes?"

"hey, please don't be sorry..." you start to say, but before you can get any further, the woman has already walked away with her shoppping basket.

you fall silent.

the same way the man next to you too has grown quiet, an awkward silence taking up the foot between you both. until you break it with a strained chuckle.

"we were acting giddy and loving to each other, eh?"

"were we?" comes the contemplative question to your comment. you look up to find gojo looking at you, the blue of his eyes weirdly bright in the dim lights of the supermarket as he repeats, "were we, cookie?"

yes. no. you don't really know—

yes, 'cause you know you love him.

not since forever, no, but close enough to it: your once-fascination for the supposed mortal deity of the jujutsu world, the mitochondrion on which the cellular structure of the society banks to survive; that grew into something made of wonder, respect and fondness, as you slowly came to know not only the icon but also the man behind it; that grew into something so profound, nestling deep within your existence– so much so that you feel the earth shifting on its axis everytime he calls you or grins at you or just looks in your direction—

no, 'cause you know you aren't loved back.

not the way you wish to be... not that you blame gojo for that, though!

you know he is way too busy to be thinking of such topics– what with being the strongest sorcerer ever, the head of the one-man gojo clan, the teacher to the first-years at tokyo high, the legal guardian– but in fact, the father figure to the two kids, 'gumi and 'miki– or maybe, just maybe, he is busy, alright, but not too busy— gojo simply doesn't see you that way; he sees you to be nothing but his former student— one he knows he can rely on to help with his children, or the groceries, or a variety of other menial daily tasks he can just hire help for—

you don't know.

yeah... you really, really don't know– and by now, you think you don't even want to know anymore. it's easy, it's safe, it's nice to remain not knowing. the word 'yes' comes with too many dreams– the word 'no' serves the perfect haven to nightmares.

the three words "i don't know" bear no such burden on their back– an untroubled answer you decide to offer, decide to escape using for the time being— until a slight knock on the head interrupts you, followed by an entertained set of chortles.

you peer up to find gojo beaming down at you, his eyes crinkled and cheeks dimpled. something twists in the middle of your chest, but it isn't painful; it's grounding. pleasant, even.

"it's too easy to get you worried, y'know? you're unbelievably easy to manipulate, heh."

"oh, am i now?" you retort, eyes narrowing into a cross glare– only to be betrayed by the fond smile grazing your lips not even a beat later. the man hums, grin simmering down to a knowing smile.

"mmhm," he says with that musical sway to his tone that never fails to make your fingers tingle, "you should have seen your face when i asked you the question– so pale and stiff– almost as if i was asking you to leave then and there, hearing that granny's comments—"

"you would have asked me to, if they were true– wouldn't you?"

gojo's smile vanishes in the blink of an eye. and you think the hand he has stretched out to the shelves of biscuits might fall too– but it does not, and you see him take a packet of your favourite bourbon biscuits followed by a packet of the digestives you've been forcing him to eat, and place them into the cart.

he checks the shopping list in your hand before he looks back at you.

before he smiles back at you: so soft, so solemn, so un-satoru— you instantly regret interrupting him with such a question.

but you do know how it is, don't you? what with a thudding heart and a thinking brain...

the handle of the cart digs deep indents into your palm as you press the weight of your worries into the cool metal and lean towards your companion on this grocery run, the same way a moth flies towards a flame, towards its doom–

"don't you ever dream of falling in love, gojo-san?" you let your voice drop to a murmur, audible only to you and the object of your desires, the subject of your worries, "do you not dream of a happily ever after with your 'one'– do you, gojo-san?"

"no," the response to your words comes in the very same instant. the man's shades slip a touch down the bridge of his nose as he pins his sharp gaze on you– though it can do nothing to hide the mild tremor in his grin from you when he says, "and i don't plan on dreaming ever. dreaming is only for fools with too much time to spare– do i look like a fool with too much time to spare, cookie?"

no. not at all. you don't. you look the farthest from it, in fact— is what you know you should say, and just drop the matter. for now. forever—

but you don't... just don't.

retorting instead, still a murmur but with the faint lick of a fire now, "and what do you suggest should be done to those fools, gojo-san? punished severely for their grievous crime of dreaming, hm?"

"oh, don't be too harsh," he tuts with a breezy chuckle, "what people do is honestly their business; one i've got no interest in interfering in— but..." his grin twists into something wry, a change you find tough to tear your gaze away from, "i don't think i would give such folks the time of my day– it's simply not worth it to talk with those whose feet are not on the solid ground, floating around meaninglessly in air–"

"why are you talking with me then?"

interrupted, gojo blinks. once, and twice, then thrice.

you watch your face crumple in the dark tint of his shades, withering and cracking in the dull light and stale air of this stupid supermarket; but definitely not as stupid as you:

messing things up when they're perfectly fine and alright, only 'cause you do not, rather cannot, keep your mouth shut, no matter what– all your inhibitions let gone of as your heart gains control over your brain and your stupid damned mouth—

you feel a tiny knock on your forehead, the second time this evening, followed by strands of hair being gently brushed away; too careful for your breath to not get stuck in your chest. you peer up at the man in front, teeth lightly gnawing the inside of your lower lip.

gojo's features shift into something between fond and worried– you just hope you aren't misreading him right now– the man tucks those strands of hair behind the shell of your ear.

his fingers still right above your jaw, touching yet not really touching, features finally, finally, settling into a smile– "maybe because i enjoy talking with you, cookie, no matter how foolish you are."

some people say, marriage is a holy act, a sacred institution, in and of itself— connecting hearts, binding souls– cementing the promises of staying together forever... whilst few see marriage to be meaningless— paltry affair of papers and signatures and people, none bearing any significance, 'cause nothing can, not when it comes to the matters of the hearts, neither in proving nor in disproving them–

no matter what people think, you think you will be okay, irrespective of whether you marry gojo or not, irrespective of whether gojo loves you or not– provided– and this is a weird, still important 'provided'—

you and he end up shopping together in the supermarket, feeling and seeming so happy and comfortable with each other— others mistake you for a pair of newlyweds, blissfully deep in love.

tysm to my dearest andy [@andysdrafts], mimi [@avatarofstars] & dilay [@roseqzpd] for constantly motivating me while i was writing this. ilysm my darlings 😘😘😘

masterlist

[bruciemilf]

Hi, I was wondering if you had any baby Batkids headcanons, just all of them being extra clingy and obsessed with their dear dad. 😊

YES!! daily dose of fluff!!

Jason keeps a meticulous collection of poems that remind him of Bruce; Some collected from his favourite books, some he's written himself. They progress from love, to rage, to sadness, to regret, to a final, angry forgiveness, to love again

When Dick moved out, when his body was still clumsy and unfamiliar in his apartment, he spent hours just staring at his contact list.

Just aching for the courage to call Bruce. The little boy in him was begging to go home, and Nightwing kept denying him. But he'd know. it's a family tradition that Bruce always calls first.

Damian was never tickled; He hasn't giggled since he was 6, and Talia couldn't give to him what Ra's never gave to her. He was a blade, and blades don't feel.

When Bruce tickles him for the first time, he thinks its a punishment. His stomach hurts from laughing too much.

Tim's obsessive tendencies go root deep. He's vigilant, keeping a faithful watch on Bruce's every move. That's why he's there for. That's his purpose. He's good at that. He's useful for that. Keeping Gotham safe. It makes up for his invasion in the family.

One time, Jason gets hurt on patrol. Its a stab wound. Standard and measly. Just another scar on top of many. But it's a scar Tim could've prevented.

" I should've warned him. Should've-- saved him, been faster," And Bruce says he did warn him; He did everything right. There's no such thing as a good patrol. " I didn't do it on purpose. Bruce, it wasn't on purpose. Please believe me."

Bruce commands emotion in a way Tim is envious of. You think you see past the mask and he always shows you something different. Tim expects to get yelled at, and scolded, and berated for his sloppiness.

And then Bruce holds him, with an intentional tightness and unyielding tenderness, " Oh, my boy. My poor baby."

Stephanie doesn't get upset when people DON'T assume she and Bruce are father and daughter. Mostly because they're right. They're not. At their best, they're co-workers. At their worst, they're Bruce and Steph.

Fathers are overrated, anywhere.

But just for once, she'd like people to assume. She'd like to be mistaken for Bruce Wayne’s bastard child, or his one night stand, or drunken mistake, like the rest of the boys.

But when Bruce does put a hand on her shoulder, when a creep flirts with her at a Gala, " You're not in my daughter's league. You can't even afford tickets." It does feel good.

Cass and Bruce have particular love languages. Cass is tactile. She needs to touch you, and feel you, even if she doesn't speak. It's a proof of existence. It proves she's not an instrument of danger. Even danger deserves gentle things.

If there's anything true about Bruce, it's his lack of judgement. He asses, weights and critics, sure, but he's never one to judge. "Hey, honeybee. " and Cass loves that she doesn't have to hide. She can exist around him, and he can just hug her, and that's enough.

Cass has a tattoo of the bat symbol on her chest. Blsckbat rarely works with officers, but when she does, there's no pleasure in it. Especially when she has to stop them from putting a bullet through a starving kid's head.

"I gotta ask you; How do you do it? Why do you do it? No one's looking. No one's gonna know."

And Cass, angrily, rips a chunk off her suit to reveal the bat symbol. Gotham's mark of worship, it's unholy saint.

Thought saints aren't saints because they're holy. Saints are saints when they bleed. And they don't know how not to do that.

" This means mercy. This means Life."