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yourmidnightlover · 9 months ago

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the sun

pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader

summary: after the events of the snap, you find out news that's both heart wrenching and warming. what happens five years later when bucky's back?

warnings: death, mourning, pregnancy, childbirth, canon-typical violence (not much but just adding to cover all the bases), loosely based on end game and infinity war (as in ignore my mistakes lmaooo), if i failed to mention any warnings PLEASE LET ME KNOW!

wc: 2.6k

a/n: dude idk why i've had an urge to write such heart wrenching angst lately. i'm actually in a decent place rn. i tried to cut this fic down bc originally it was SOOOO long i felt like a lot of it was just filler and i feel like shorter fics of mine tend to do better... ANYWHO! this does have a happy/hopeful ending so no worries! also picturing this beefcake for this story is AGHHHHHHH!

you never thought two lines on a stick could ever break your heart the way they did.

tears clouded your vision as you gripped the counter, trying not to crumble or succumb to your grief.

6 weeks ago, the avengers lost. everything.

half of the world, gone in a moment.

in one moment, your world collapsed. seeing bucky fade to dust right in front of you...

sobs wracked through your body as you crumbled to the ground.

this was supposed to be a happy moment. there should be tears of joy, not sobs of sorrow. your heart should feel full of love, not like there's a super-soldier sized hole in it.

"y/n," nat's voice rang outside the door, giving you a moment to yourself.

"just-," you tried to level your breathing before she opened the door, knowing but not understanding the grief you were feeling.

she wrapped her arms around your body, tucking your head into her neck as she gently rubbed your back soothingly. steve leaned against the bathroom door, glancing on the counter to see what they had all expected.

a positive pregnancy test.

you were having bucky's baby.

without bucky.

you gripped his dog tags that you had been wearing since the funeral. they were the only thing that could truly ground you.

they brought back happy memories of cuddling in bed, the cool metal shocking your skin for only a moment before realizing that it was only bucky and smiling at the memory.

god, it hadn't even been two months.

how were you supposed to do this alone?

"we're here for you," steve's voice called from the doorway, as if he could hear your thoughts. "you'll never be alone. not in this... not ever." he shook his head, his brows furrowed in a serious, straight line.

eventually, your sobs subsided. you stood with nat from your seat on the ground, wiping your own eyes mustering up a pathetic smile before she left you and steve to work out your grief together.

"we didn't even know it was possible," you shrugged. "it's like he sent me them..." you placed your hand on an invisible bump before facing steve, his teary eyes reminding you that he had lost his best friend, too. "he sent us this baby."

you reached your hand out for steve to hold. he took it gratefully and pulled you into his arms, hugging you tight and letting only a few tears slip his waterline before pulling back.

"if you'll let me, i want to be there for you for everything," his chin wobbled. "buck would kick my ass if i let you go through this alone." a genuine laugh left your lips for the first time in nearly two months.

"i would be so grateful for that," you nodded as you let go of his arms. "part of me still can't believe that it's real. it's like part of me still expects him to walk into the compound from a long mission or something..." you shook your head. "i know that sounds so stupid."

"it's not," he shook his head with a smile. "it's what i wish was true, maybe it's your subconscious trying to preserve your mind?"

"maybe," you shrugged before continuing, "i should probably talk to tony and bruce, huh?"

you knew you were around eight weeks along.

according to the doctors' tony had enlisted, however, you were already 12 weeks along, which was impossible.

bucky had been gone on a mission at that time... but it's whatever. you got to hear the heartbeat. steve went with you, too. you both bawled together. you kept three copies of the ultrasound and he kept two.

banner had already offered to do some testing on the dna of the baby, noting that the serum would likely affect the pregnancy (as it probably already has).

you had talked to tony about retiring from the whole superhero gig for the time being. you needed to mourn and prepare for a new life simultaneously. tony had promised to provide anything you needed at the drop of a hat, and he sure as hell delivered.

within no time, your pregnancy was being measured at 20 weeks while only being pregnant for 12. banner was concerned for your body's ability to keep up with the rapid rate of growth of the baby. he had you on a strict, hefty diet with two different prenatal vitamins in attempt to help your nutrition.

in spite of your best efforts, you were always exhausted and in pain. but you wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. this was bucky's baby. you didn't care how much pain you went through when you had half of him growing inside of you.

you couldn't walk for long without feeling like passing out, which banner chalked up to low iron. steve had grown progressively more worried for you and the baby the longer the pregnancy went on.

as a result, he had moved into the spare room that was in your and bucky's house. truly, it just made it easier for him to help you finish up the nursery anyway.

he was very handy about it all, painting, building furniture from scratch, the whole deal.

"i've been thinking... and if it's a girl, i want to name her evangeline james barnes," you informed steve as you ate the steak he had been making for the past few weeks of your pregnancy, as ordered by dr. banner. that with carrots, broccoli, potatoes, and for dessert strawberries, blueberries and raspberries over ice cream. "and if it's a boy, cyrus james barnes. evangeline means good news, and cyrus means sun."

steve placed his hand over yours, "i think buck would've loved them." he smiled warmly as you downed the food in a few minutes.

you had begun showing soon after you found out you were pregnant, but now, it felt like it was impossible to hide. nat had been wonderful about helping you keep up with the changes your body was going through, getting you new maternity clothes every week.

she even made sure to get you every single craving that wasn't in accordance to banner's hefty diet. not that he didn't want you to eat more, he thought it was best you did! but he also wanted to make sure that with all that you did eat, your body got as many nutrients as possible.

just to be safe, he kept you on other vitamin supplements anyway.

you couldn't help but imagine what bucky would say or do about everything now.

he would hold your body closely, pressing firm kisses to your bump every chance he could get while whispering some sickly sweet sayings to your unborn child, words that would melt the winter soldier's cold exterior.

he would whisper words of encouragement any moment you felt worried about your abilities to be a mom. he would say how beautiful you were, in spite of being bloated in places you didn't know could bloat.

he would be wonderful, and in your mind, he was still alive and vibrant. well, as vibrant as bucky ever was, at least.

truthfully, that's the only way you were able to keep going on like this. steve was wonderful, but you couldn't help but want the love of your life by your side as you tried to navigate this new chapter.

in a couple more weeks, you were projected to be at 32 weeks. bruce and tony were talking with your doctors about the safety of inducing so early, both for you and the baby.

oh, and you wanted the gender to be a surprise.

and within the week, you were having your baby.

steve and nat were by your side during the birth, whispering encouraging words and compliments of your strength.

"i need him!" you screamed in pain as you held one of each of their hands, sobbing in agony. "i need james! i need my bucky! i can't do this alone, i can't-i can't!"

"you can," nat reminded you. "this baby needs you," she held your face to look at hers. "bucky is a part of this baby." you swore you could see tears in her eyes before turning to face steve.

"remember what you told me when you found out you were pregnant?" he didn't bother wiping the tears from his face. "bucky sent you-sent us this baby. he knows you can do it." you sniffled before nodding at your two best friends, pushing with one last scream and a second later, you had...

"cyrus james barnes," the nurse called to you. "it's a boy, congratulations mom."

the next few years went by quicker than you could've ever imagined.

crawling, first words, first steps...

you missed bucky. not a day passed where you didn't miss him.

but, having cy helped a lot. he looked just like his father. dark brown hair, icy blue eyes, a cute little nose... not to mention his father's stubbornness.

you made sure he knew who his father was. you took him to the museum often, showing him the statue of his father and his background in the world war, him saving the world so much. you told him how you fell in love with him.

how you fell for the quiet man before ever really talking to him. how you were partners on a long-term, undercover mission and that's where your love ignited from the sparks.

not that cy understood any of what you told him. you just felt it was important to know that his parents loved him, and each other dearly.

you never took off his dog tags, either.

steve was a huge help the whole time. he kept working for the avengers, so he was gone often, but he provided a good male role model for cyrus. after all, he was his uncle steve. he already taught him how to throw a ball, albeit a little softball, but it counts!

you made sure to document everything that went on in yours and cyrus's life.

banner had said that cyrus was growing at an exceeding rate, but nothing to be concerned about. in fact, cyrus was turning five in almost half a year, meaning the anniversary of bucky's death, or disappearance or whatever you called it, was coming up.

then, you got a call from tony and banner.

it all happened so quickly, from testing to planning to the execution. pepper watched cyrus for you while you went back with steve, scott, and tony to get the tesseract.

of course, the men being men had to come upon a few hiccups, but eventually, after going as far back as the 70s, you brought back the tesseract.

the only thing is that nat never came back...

next thing you know, bruce is snapping his fingers and clint is getting a call from his supposedly deceased wife. your eyes fill with tears, hands searching in your pockets for your phone to see if you've gotten anything yet.

is it possible he wasn't brought back? he was the first to... disintegrate. die. maybe that meant something in the eyes of the stones?

then, you felt a buzz in your hand.

although, you didn't have any time to try to grasp what that meant, because more aliens came to earth.

shocker.

after yet another war, one that you weren't even prepared for, after losing more people, again. after losing tony...

but amidst the chaos of the aftermath of the fight, with screams of joy and shock and grief surrounding you, tears streaming down your face, your eyes met the blue ones you only saw in your son.

he slowly walked towards you as the tears sped up. you didn't even realize when your feet began running towards him.

when his arms wrapped around your waist, you finally felt the home you thought you had come to terms with never feeling again. your arms wrapped around his neck, your face buried in his shoulder as you breathed in the scent of gunmetal that had overtaken him in the battle.

"oh my god," you cried into the leather of his jacket. he lifted you off the ground, your legs wrapping around his waist as you felt his smile on your cheek. "i can't believe you're really here."

"i'm here, doll," his hands cradled your head so tenderly. "i'm not ever leaving again. never."

you pulled back before your eyes widened in realization. "you've gotta meet someone, jamie."

his brows furrowed in confusion, just smiling and nodding along with whatever you said.

within the next few hours, simply being held by bucky before steve stole him away with a hug, you finally brought him home.

"so, steve moved in," you started as you pulled your car into the driveway, turning to see bucky looking at you with an incredulous look. "you'll see why." you reached to hold his hand before he brought yours to his lips, pressing a kiss there.

you told him to wait in the car as you went inside to relieve the babysitter for cyrus. after giving him some cash, he went outside, knocking on your car window to let bucky know he should make his way inside.

upon entering, he saw you sitting on the floor with a little boy with striking blue eyes that seemed so familiar to him. his nose, too. his lips though, they were all yours. he had a slight grin plastered on his lips, one that matched yours to a t.

"daddy?" suddenly, it all clicked.

his heart, his mind, his fucking soul, everything made sense now. the pain, hydra, the mind washing, the torture.

meeting you. falling in love. dying?

his son.

he started walking closer to bucky before the steady walk turned into a run. bucky knelt down, wrapping the boy in his arms, cradling his tiny frame in his arms protectively. his son.

"cyrus james barnes," you said with a teary smile on your face. bucky, without breaking the hug with his son, looked up at you with a smile that matched yours. "cyrus means 'sun', and i thought it was fitting. he brought me so much light and hope after you..." you choked up before he stood up with cy in his arms, walking towards you before wrapping you in the big, family hug.

"i love you so much, both of you."

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fluff #james bucky barnes #marvel #sargeant barnes #bucky #sargeant james barnes #james bucky buchanan barnes #james barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes hurt/comfort #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes whump #bucky x avenger!reader #bucky x fem!reader #dad!bucky

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erwinsvow · 3 months ago

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you and john progress quickly in your relationship.

warnings: basically john is controlling and wants a housewife whether you want to be one or not, possessive/toxic behavior, elements of gaslighting, age gap, mentions of sex

john price leans too heavily on the crazy side of possessive—and at the same time, he likes to see you perfectly taken care of, but by no one if not him. you think stupidly that you'd be a fool not to be interested—a handsome, older man similar to the ones you and your friends are always fantasizing about after complaining about boys your age. he checks off every box, a bit too well, actually.

he communicates, openly and often, not just single word texts but rather long phone calls and drop-ins at the small florist shop where you work. plans are always made in person—you think he's just old-fashioned but there's something about seeing your eyes light up when he lays out the order of the date night he's put together for the two of you. it's sweet—like no one has ever put this much thought into something for you. it's always dinner at some place that would probably cost half your rent, a sweet treat after since you're so fond of it but you feel greedy ordering dessert at the restaurant, dancing or a walk or browsing through a bookstore together or something else that's not just going back home. it's so well thought out, so attuned to your taste. you almost forget you've just met john a couple of weeks ago, that he was just a cute customer buying flowers from you a few dates ago.

your friends spur him on—you can't tell if it's something akin to jealousy or not. the very idea makes your face burn—you've never been someone that others are jealous of, but maybe now you are, and that's all because of john. and he doesn't let up—keeps it going wonderfully, still planning dates and picking you up and bringing you some small yet expensive jewelry after the first month claiming that it reminded him of you. you don't think it's something that he would just stumble across at a store but you accept it anyways, start wearing the ring on your right hand. you think you should feel alarmed when he presents matching earrings a little bit later, but you don't. you start wearing them daily, let your friends catch a glimpse when you move your hair behind your ear.

you've become perfectly pliant to john price and his antics, eager for his validation, eager to see him again. the way he talks about things makes you think he knows everything there is to know in the world, so you believe him wholeheartedly. like when your landlord says the complex is being bought out. your little one bed, one bath is perfect for you but you certainly don't want to buy an apartment right now. but it's okay—because john is there to help. he answers the phone when you're sobbing into the receiver, comes over and comforts you. he shushes you when you blubber about moving and work and finding a new place and murmurs against your ear, moving your hair aside to look at the earrings he'd gotten you.

"sweet girl, why're you cryin', hm? you'll just come live with me until s'all sorted, alright?"

and, well, john knows best, so you listen. a few short weeks later, you're moved into his place, which is so much nicer than your own. your books and photo frames and knick-knacks blend in perfectly with his belongings. it's a little further from work, but how can you give up waking up next to john each day and curling up next to him, severely fucked out, each night?

the commute is getting annoying—you grumble about it one night over the dinner table. john meets your eyes and runs a hand over his beard and says—

"why don't you just quit, love?"

and you don't really have an answer. you love the shop, love getting paid to be around flowers all day. but is it really worth dragging yourself back and forth across the city every day, especially when you don't even pay rent anymore? you tried, insisted, even, but john says something about how he's not your landlord and you're not his tenant, saying something else about how the missus doesn't pay rent, and you're left with a burning face wondering how many other times he's referred to you as that. it's not like you need the money, you don't think you've paid for anything other than coffee and bagels since you moved in.

you tell him you'll think about it, but then the decision is made for you. the little old lady who owns the store says she needs to downsize, and well, she had to make a tough choice. it's fine—you're hardly upset. your coworkers both have young kids, are both there every day of the week, they definitely need it more than you. so for the first time in a while, you head home early, picking up some stuff for dinner and finding it way too easy to swipe john's credit card to pay for it. you get dinner ready and then get yourself ready, waiting for john to come home to tell him about what happened, hoping he's not too upset that you're pretty much a leech now.

you and john end up tangled in the sheets a little later—you hum while he rubs your back and you think briefly that you'll have to wash these sheets tomorrow since you two have made a mess. his touch is hot, he's like a furnace, but you can't pull away, clutching to his warmth and gripping his arm with your hand. the only time he even looks concerned, or maybe upset? angry? is when you mention that you can start looking for a new place to work nearby home. he says something you only half-hear in your sleepy state, something about 'don't worry your head, love. i can take care of my girl.'

and well, who are you to argue with that?

(when you wake up, the ring he'd gotten you what seems like forever ago, is on your left hand now. on your left ring finger. but that's crazy, you swear you always put it on your right hand. it fits nicely enough there, so you leave it.)

#back to studying! i love when people write about how price is crazy so i thought i'd give it a whirl #john price #john price x reader #putting the tags in the beginning for once

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creativewritersposts · 5 months ago

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concert ticket - Lando Norris

summary; Lando Norris x reader

You're hyped to get concert tickets for Taylor Swift - the Eras tour until everything is sold out and you're very upset about it. Lando gets very creative to cheer you up!

warning(s); none, little bit angst, fluff, maybe grammar errors

author's note; hi ✨ hope you enjoy this one!

Quickly reminder my request box is always open 💞

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"hey babe, Taylor Swift is going on tour!", a squeak escapes your mouth, too excited since you heard the news. Lando huffs, rolling his eyes, "I'll not go with you!". It's not like he hates the singer, he likes her songs but for two or three hours nonstop?

You blink twice, "why not?". You put on your begging face which lando never could resist. He crosses his arms in front of his chest, "I'm not a fan of songs like "Stopp you're losing meee", he imitates the lyrics with dramatic body gestures. "You cry over her songs like you're lovesick and you're in a happy relationship with me!", he argues.

You can feel how your mouth changes into a small, thin line. "don't you dare to talk about this masterpiece like that, Lando Norris!". When it comes to Taylor, you're ready to fight. He bites on his nails, if it makes you happy, he would go with you.

"One deal, you have to organize these tickets and I'll go with you", he smiles apologizing. Here you are, one month later in front of your laptop since thee hours.

It's frustrating. You're not the only one with the plan to buy tickets and you need to wait. "argh!", you smash your hand on the keyboard, it could be such a happy day.

When you click to the main page, the worst nightmare came true; no tickets available. Sold out.

Of course you didn't call Lando - he would throw a party just not going to this. But for you it meant the world.

After three days Lando is worried, he was away for promotion and you were awkwardly quiet. Too quiet.

He knows the ticket sale started, you talked nonstop about it for one month straight. He's sure you got tickets, that's why he didn't bought any.

He was sure you'll get some.

Unlocking the door he steps in, ready to say hello to you with a big hug, kisses and good food.

"Hey darling", Lando steps in the kitchen and kisses your neck from behind, because you're cooking. "Hm", you mumble under anger about the world.

"Someone is in a bad mood, huh?", jokes Lando in love. You look so cute when you're grumpy.

"Shut up", you hiss in his direction under tears, bad mood is no explanation for your feelings. All hopes are gone.

"What happened?!", Lando got big eyes, shocked about your reaction. It's atypical for you. "We're not going to the Eras tour", you sob whilst holding the pan. Cooking his favorite meal. With his favorite tv show. And you're not even allowed to see your favorite artist, your biggest idol.

"I'm so sorry ", Lando steps closer and hugs you tight, "you're not!", you sob even more in his chest.

"I am", he lays his chin on your head, thinking about what he can do. He can't help with concert tickets but he can help you.

He kisses your hair, asking you randomly, "you're free thursday night?", you just nod. After this you sit down and eat the dinner without more conversations about this. But he has ideas.

Four days to get the ideas to your best night ever. He goes to shops, asks his friend to help him and learns Taylor Swift song lyrics. He ordered fan merch. It's not hard to hide from you because you have a busy time schedule at work so you're not coming home until 8pm.

"Lan-oooh!", you see glitter on the floor inside his apartment. "Lando?", you look through the open door, where you can see ballons, more glitter, different colors, colored snacks and letters on the ceiling, 'eras tour' on it. "aww how cute!", you can't believe he did it for you. A Taylor Swift themed night.

"Change into your fanciest, most glamorous dress because we're having the best night ever with Taylor", he dances like a goofball in the living room. Before you walk into your wardrobe, you walk back to Lando and kiss his lips, "i love you", thankful to have this man in your life.

He wouldn't say it loud but maybe he got two tickets. But that's a surprise for later.

#lando x you #lando imagine #lando x reader #lando norris #lando norris x reader #lando fluff #lando norris blurb #lando norris imagine #formula one blurbs #formula one x reader #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 #formula one

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loveandmurders · 1 year ago

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You belong to Ambrose I (poly!Sinclairs x f!reader)

Hey everyone, I'm happy to finally post the first part of this imagine.

I really hope you'll enjoy it <3

Warnings: no proof reading, a few strong words, angst, dangerous!Lester, mentions of violence, blood and murders, morally grey reader.

“Hey, mom, what do you think Ambrose looks like now?” you heard yourself asking your mother without even meaning to.

The woman sent you a quick glance before her attention went back on the food she was preparing on the kitchen table.

“Why?” she sternly asked back and you tried to shrug it off, no matter how embarrassed you were starting to feel about the whole conversation you just brought up.

“Don’t know. I’m just planning a road trip with friends and we’ll go close back to where Ambrose is…was. I noticed it wasn’t even marked on maps anymore” you explained and your mother hummed

“Then you got your answer. Ambrose must be gone.” she said “Like the brothers you used to love so much” she replied and sent you another look, as you glanced down at your lap, in shame.

You should have known better than to talk about Ambrose to your mother. The woman had always wanted to pretend it had been a terrible nightmare.

“Mom…” you whispered

“I’ve never understood why you were so fond of them. Your dad either. They were a terrible influence on you. I’m happy you decided to burn the bridges with them and that you never went back to Ambrose. There was nothing for you there. And those people were troublesome and violent and… freaks. You deserved way better than them.” she continued and you resisted the urge to take their defence. They weren’t freaks, they were… a great part of your life and now a great hole inside your chest. “What was their name again?” your mother asked.

“Sinclairs” you instantly replied before biting your tongue

“Ah yes. Well, I’m glad you didn’t become one” she continued and you frowned at that.

“What do you mean, mom?” you wondered with a tilt of your head

“The eldest one, when he came back to Ambrose after his mother died and that he was sent away for a few months, and before his dad died that same day, he looked for you. He knocked at our door. Thank God you were away with your dad then. I told him to go away and he assured me that he would never go away from you, and that you would become his wife one day too.”

“His… wife” you whispered, your heart aching.

Bo was indeed often speaking about marrying you and sharing you with his brothers, but you always thought there were only words; the Sinclairs never really planned out their future. Bo was too obsessed with cars and getting free from his family to care about anything else. Vincent was too focused on his art. Lester was just a lost kid wandering into the woods late at night. You hadn’t thought they were actually seeing you as their future. You always appeased Bo, you always brought Vincent back to reality, you always helped Lester feel like he was part of something.

“To be honest” your mom resumed and your attention went back on her “with the amount of time you were spending with him and his brothers, I was really worried you would agree on doing something that stupid. And even though you left Ambrose heartbroken and sobbing, I’m happy something happened between you, him and his twin, that day. I don’t know what it is, but I knew it convinced you to leave.” she continued and you didn’t answer. The memory of that day was still burning you to the core.

You had been so happy so see Bo and later on, Vincent. You had run into their arms and they had hugged you with fierce love. You were all planning on getting Lester back too.

And then, Bo killed his dad and Vincent told you he was going to continue the House of Wax, the way his mother always did. You knew about the murders, you knew people were beneath the wax, but you never said anything because you loved the boys. And despite how an awful mother Trudy was, she liked you. You were a girl, and she could finally chat around with what looked like a daughter to her. Victor was also a little more careful around you. You were loved by the Sinclairs, and they couldn’t explain it; it just happened.

But their love was dark and violent, and you couldn’t agree to live like that; you couldn’t stay in Ambrose when everything was dying around and you couldn’t live from murders. You promised yourself to never betray your boys, but at the same time, you left with your parents without a goodbye. You knew that if you decided to go see the twins one last time, they would convince you to stay and it couldn’t happen. You never recovered from the fact you didn’t see Lester again before leaving and you hoped Bo had been able to bring him back home. You were certain he did though, because his people were the only thing that mattered to him.

You were about to leave the kitchen when your mother called your name and you turned around, with a raised eyebrow, silently asking her what she wanted.

“Do me a favour and stay away from Ambrose during your little road trip, okay?” she said with a hint of concern in her voice

“You said yourself that there is nothing there anymore anyways” you replied, a little bit surprised by your mother’s attitude

“I know but… I don’t want you to tempt the devil” she replied and you only found yourself nodding.

You wondered if by the devil she meant Bo.

Bo knelt in front of a woman he just killed. She was the last one of the group and he was glad about it because he felt quite tired now. It was too hot today to play hide and seek with assholes. At least, the night was already casting its shadows around Ambrose and bringing with it a little bit of fresh air. Bo looked down at the woman, tilting his head to the side as he watched the pretty necklace she had around her neck. It was slightly covered in blood but he was pretty sure he could wash it without trouble. It looked expensive; he was certain the glitter coming from beneath the blood was a little diamond. He took it off her body without a care and pocketed it before Vincent could use this jewel on his next wax statue.

“Y/N would’ve liked it” Bo hummed to himself before sadly sighting. His throat tightened as always when he was saying your name out loud.

Whenever he was spotting something that reminded him of you, he was always grabbing it and putting it away, in a box filled with gifts for you. He never stopped hoping that one day he would be able to give you this box. You would realise how much you were loved then; but so far it only happened in his dreams. And yet, he was thinking about you everyday of his life and he still believed you would come back home one day. He was certain you were meant to be a Sinclair; even his parents were liking you so it had to mean something. He missed you so much, he missed your laugh and he missed the way you loved his brothers and himself. Ambrose was empty without you. Life had always been shit, but your absence was torture. He had thought that after a few years, the pain would subside, but it really didn’t. It often felt like it was actually growing up inside his chest. You left with a piece of themselves, you left with the only sun and happiness the boys truly felt. He knew his brothers were feeling the same, because everytime they were all eating together at night, the conversation always ended on what you became. And on why you never came back.

They could guess you were disapproving of the killing, but they couldn’t stand the idea that maybe you got scared of them. They couldn’t even say it out loud; you were the only thing they would never have hurt.

Bo sighted again as he grabbed the woman by her ankles and he started to pull her to the house. Vincent came upstairs when he heard a body being dragged on the floor and he helped his twin out. Vincent could tell by the look in Bo’s eyes that he was thinking about you. It was the only moment Bo was utterly silent too, lost in thoughts.

Vincent couldn’t blame him. He had hundreds of books filled with drawings of you. Whenever he thought that he would never hear your voice again, never feel your touch on his skin anymore, Vincent was drawing you. He was certain you existed that way, and he was certain he would never forget about what you looked like, even if he knew your figure and face were carved inside his chest and brain. You used to caress the bad side of his face and to remind him he was handsome, even in front of Trudy or Victor. You had never been afraid to show yourself with “the freak”. And his skin felt so dry and painful now your fingers hadn’t traced it in years.

The twins worked in utter silence and none of them felt hungry that night, so they went to bed earlier than usual. None of them slept actually, simply staring at the ceiling or at the wall, wondering where you were and if you were happy… without them. They wanted you to be happy as much as they wanted you to be miserable without them, because it was their only chance you would one day come back home.

Lester wasn’t better than the twins. And if Bo fucked with some girls, Lester just couldn’t even think about touching someone else than you. It felt wrong to him. He promised you he was yours and only yours after all. He had always enjoyed how a little bit possessive you were with the three of them. Lester wasn’t certain of a lot of things, but he knew he belonged to you. You had always loved them equally, giving them the love they were all craving so much.

You were always in Lester’s mind. He was always hoping to find you among a group of tourists, to be fair. He never stopped looking for you and hoping to see you again. You belonged to them too, so he couldn’t understand how you could live away from them. And he knew that if he ever found you again, he wouldn’t hesitate to lock you up somewhere if it meant keeping you by his side. Forever.

And he was certain that the twins were thinking the same. They lost you once, they wouldn’t allow it to happen again.

But for that… he needed to find you first.

And every morning and every night, he promised himself he would. Out of the three, he was the one who was the most certain he could get you back home, no matter if you wanted it or not. You were his little goddess, so he was certain that at some point you would come close to Ambrose again… and he would stumble upon you… and he would get you home. You would become the divinity of Ambrose once again, and everything would be alright.

One day, luck seemed to be on his side.

The closer you drove to Ambrose, the more you recognised the roads. Your mother’s words never stopped echoing inside your head and at some point, you turned the wheel so you wouldn't get too close to the place. A part of you wanted to drive right back to it; you even felt a little pang when you took the opposite path. You wanted to be back home more than anything, but you were too afraid of what would await you there. You even believed that the twins would be so mad at you, they would kill you and turn you into a wax statue so you couldn’t leave anymore without saying goodbye.

You found a little campsite and you all decided to spend the evening and night there. You forced yourself to focus on your people so you could forget about the Sinclairs. Another part of you was begging you to leave this place and to drive as far as possible away from Ambrose. You had no idea which parts of you were stronger.

You realised you didn’t have enough food for tonight so you and another girl took the car to find a shop nearby. It was late so a lot of them were close and you had to admit, you shivered in fear when your friend showed you the only store open 24/7 in the area. It was very close to Ambrose; little did you know that it was actually the town Lester was living in. You tried to not show anything as you drove to the store. You crossed your fingers to not run into any of the Sinclairs before you thought how stupid this was. The boys wouldn’t be there, and they might even be dead because of their way of life. And you were a lucky girl, something like that couldn’t happen to you.

Even if something inside of you was bubbling in excitement and hope.

As you entered the store, a man was leaving it. He moved to the side to let you come in and as you were about to thank him, your eyes met his and widened.

Lester.

You tried to move past him, hoping he wouldn’t have recognised you or that he would hate you enough to let you go easily. But you were a fool. He instantly grabbed your wrist as he whispered your name, bringing you back to him. He was in trance. He couldn’t believe the day finally came. Your friend frowned, wondering what was going on. She placed an arm around your shoulder to show you support

“Can you let go of her, buddy?” she calmly said and Lester instantly obeyed, not wanting to cause a scene. He put his hands in front of him in defence.

“Sorry. Hi, Y/N, ‘s been a long time” he hummed, looking for your eyes.

“Hi, Les. Sorry, but we’re a bit in a hurry here, we’ll chat another time, hmm?” you said, hoping to get out of this discussion as fast as possible. Goosebumps littered his skin at the sound of your voice calling him by his nickname.

You were surprised when Lester simply smiled and nodded. You noticed his grin didn’t reach his eyes though and you suppressed a shiver. You knew you were in trouble, especially with him letting you go so easily. Even more when he cheerfully said as you turned your back to him “See you soon, darl”

Lester settled in his truck and waited for you and your friend to get out of the store. He dialled his big brother’s number with a light in his eyes. It was the first time in so long he felt like he was finally alive. He was certain things were finally going to be good.

“‘S up, Les?” Bo hummed at the other side of the line, always answering his phone very fast whenever his brothers needed him

“She’s here.” Lester simply said because he was too happy and excited to say anything else.

“What are ya talkin’ ‘bout, kid?” Bo asked, not wanting to get some false hope.

“Y/N. She’s at the store. She’s with a friend. Gonna follow them, I’ll send ya their location… And we’ll bring her home tonight”

It was a promise.

And a threat.

Taglist : @lacychick ; @magical-sass ; @limehaspassed ; @loveinglymessedup ; @bloodmoon-bites ; @iwantsleepplz ; @kawaistrawberry21

PART II

764 notes · View notes

rainybubbles · 2 years ago

Text

How do you meet COD men after your break-up with them ?

Price, Ghost, König, Soap, Alejandro, Gaz, Alex

(Sorry in advance for my mistakes, English is not my mother tongue. So sorry if it's badly written or if they're OOC. )

P R I C E :

-In a waiting room at the hospital with him baring his ass and you in your white coat, that's how you meet after your break-up.

-"I can't believe we're both at the hospital," John sighs in pain.

-"Yeah, I thought this was the trendy coffee shop. Turns out, my navigation skills are terrible," you joke.

-He lets out a small laugh.

-"So how did you end up with your ass burnt, John ? Did you try some sexy wax ?"you ask while you begin to examine him.

-"Do you really need to ask why something is burn ?"

-"Soap ?" you guess.

-Price nods.

-"Shit, I think you have some third degree burns on the right side."

-"Soap wanted to make a firework on the base, to light up the mood of everyone on the base. He tried to test the fireworks before, and I was there at the wrong moment."Price explains while you help him walk towards the surgery room.

-"It must have hurt like hell. Lay down here on your stomach, I'll call my colleague. His specialty is the burns, so you'll be in good hands. Normally your ass will only have scars on the right side."

-"Guess I have the other half to seduce people then." he jokes.

-You smile.

-"You know you have a great ass, John. Don't worry about that."

-"I know, love."

-You both stare at each other when he said the nickname. It has been eight months since you broke up. It was on mutual agreement, because you had a promotion on your job that didn't let you time for a relationship.

-You gulp and nod.

-You leave the room and ask the help of your colleague and continued your job.

-You tried to ignore the tension you had with John when you were talking. You tried to ignore the image of him smiling.

-Hours later when you have finished your duty, you were walking out of the hospital when you noticed John.

-"Someone of the team picks you up ?" you ask.

-"Yes, but they're late."

-You hesitate to wait with him, after all you had nothing to do. But your mind reminds you it would be a bad idea.

-"How's your job ?" Price asks.

-"I...Fine. In fact I was transferred to another service two months ago. So it's calmer and I don't have many 24h shifts now. And you ?"

-"Still busy."

-You nod.

-"I quit smoking." Price says suddenly.

-You raised your eyebrows. Cigars were like Price's identity. Like Spiderman has his mask, Price has his cigars and hats.

-"Why ?" you ask.

-"I know you hate the smell."

-"Oh."

-"I think we made a mistake back then, I wanted to text you but..." Jon starts.

-"But you get your ass burnt and me seeing your naked ass before you could do it."

-He laughed.

-"Yes."

-"So you think we should give us another chance ?"

-"I'm sure. I mean we always managed to find time for us with my busy schedule, so why would it be a bother if you have one too ? Plus you said you were transferred so I guess your schedule is back to normal ?"

-"Yes,"you say.

-"Do you want this, sweetheart ?" Price asks looking at you in the eyes

-"I..."

-"You ?"

-"I missed you," you admit.

-"Me too."

-"And shit, I didn't know what to do when I saw you again, but I'm sure I don't want to give up when eight months later you still make me flustered by just a look."

-John smiles.

-"Then we have another chance."

-You nodded.

-"Yes we have."

-I guess Soap burnt some ass, but also help to light the fire of love.

G H O S T :

-The rain was falling.

-Soldiers were wearing their uniforms, and the silence was omnipresent.

-Nobody dared to move, to speak. Only the sobbings of a widow were heard.

-It was Thomas' funeral.

-Thomas was one of Ghost's men, but also someone you knew as a friend.

-So when you arrived at the funeral, you saw Simon.

-It has been two years since you saw him. After your break-up it was as if you had imagined Ghost.

-There were no traces of him, not even in your shared flat, or in your phone.

-You didn't know what to do now he was here in front of you, so you stayed back.

-You ignored the pain of loss and bitter you were feeling about him and the situation.

-But then he was next to you. Like a shadow who didn't dare to approach you, too scared to burn himself with your lighting presence.

-"Simon," you decided to whisper.

-"Y/n," he answered.

-It was awkward. You didn't know what to do. You were with him during four years, but it was like you were strangers again.

-"I...Had Thomas said something before he died ?" you asked.

-You knew Ghost was the one who found Thomas' corpse on the mission.

-"He talked about his wife. And ask to protect the kid."

-"...I see,"you whispered.

-He didn't add anything else, so you sighed.

-"And you ?"

-"me ?" Ghost asked.

-"Simon, he was one of your men. You have known Thomas for three years, even though you didn't have a bond with him like Soap, I know you're feeling guilty now."

-"I'm guilty."

-You wanted to slap him.

-"Guilty of what, Simon ? You can't save everyone. You can't just sacrifice yourself to save the ones you love. It doesn't work like this."

-"It worked for you."

-"Are you really bringing this up ?"you whispered angrily.

-"You're happier now."

-"No I'm not. I just have tried to live again without you. Shit, you left without any warnings, without...without telling me. I had to guess you were breaking up with me."

-He stayed silent.

-"Simon, say something."

-"Why did you keep pursuing me ?"

-"Why did you let me to ?"you asked.

-"...I couldn't lose you."

-"But you did."

-"I know. But I had told you not to choose me."

-"But I did."

-He stayed silent.

-"And I will always choose you." you added.

-Simon raised his eyebrows.

-"...I screwed up." Simon whispered.

-"You did."

-"It's too late, now," Simon said.

-"It's never too late to make up for it, Simon."

-"It's been two years," Simon added.

-"But I'm here."

-"You deserve better," Simon said.

-"My tastes are shitty, what can I say ?"

-He smiled under his mask.

-"I don't ask a new romantic relationship with you, Simon. I just want to be in your life. I don't care if it's platonic, romantic or something else. Just, let me be here for you."

-"Even though we end up strangers again ?"

-"Yes."

-"You're stubborn."

-"I learned that from my ex," you joked.

-He smiled.

-"Okay," he whispered

-"Okay," you answered.

The next day he texted you.

K Ö N I G :

(/!/TW,chemo mentionned, Implied panic attack, it's not said clearly but it's clearly implied.)

-You were visiting your grandma when you saw König in the building.

-It was awkward, you both pretended to not have recognized each other but now you were both in the lift.

-Well stuck in the lift.

-Because a lift is not supposed to tremble and let out a ringing.

-"I...I think we can stop pretending we don't know each other since we're stuck for at least two hours now," you said while you sat on the floor.

-"I didn't know what to do. I'm sorry," König whispered quickly.

-"Me too, and when you didn't say anything, I thought it was better to stay silent too."

-He nodded.

-"So...you're here for your grandma ?" he asked.

-"yes."

-"Does she still have chemo or ?"

-"No she's in remission. You remembered that ?" you asked surprised

-"Yes, you talked a lot about it."

-You stayed quiet. One of the reasons for the break-up was your feeling of being alone in this relationship. König was always gone and at home it seems like he didn't listen to you, or avoided you a lot.

-You only talked once about your grandma and it was two years ago.

-"I see" you said

-The silence was awkward. But then you heard König's breath rushed.

-You noticed how his eyes were widen and how hard he gripped his own clothes.

-You know what was coming, so you held his hands like you were used to.

-"König, focus on me."

-"I'm sorry."

-"Don't apologize, focus on me and my voice. Everything is okay."

-"We're stuck in an lift. It's not okay. Scheisse."

-"yes it is, I mean it's kinda cozy ?" you tried to joke.

-He snorts.

-"Okay it smells like piss and it's small, but we're alive and breathing." you said.

-"I'm sorry," König said.

-"Don't apologize for being anxious, König. Just focus and breathe slowly."

-You inhale with him slowly.

-He calmed down a bit.

-"I'm sorry," he continued.

-"You don't have to apologize, I told you. It's not your fault the lift is-"

-"Not about this, about us." König said anxiously.

-"Us ?"

-"Yes, I...I was so worried you would leave me if I made a mistake that I ended up to avoid you and, and I couldn't stop and..."

-"And I broke up with you."

-"Yes if had communicated better with you, none of us would be hurt. I'm so sorry." König said, crying.

-"Shh, don't cry. Just focus on my voice and breathe," yousay "Can I ask you a question ?" you asked.

-He nodded.

-" Why are you saying this, now ? It's been three months since we broke up."

-"Because it felt like my last chance. I...I don't believe in fate but being stuck in an lift with you feels like a big coincidence."

-You nodded.

-"yes. I'm sorry too, König. I should have talked before making suppositions. I know you have anxiety, and I didn't consider it."

-"you couldn't have guessed."

-"yes, but I could have waited for you to explain."

-König nodded.

-"Do you feel better ?" you asked.

-"yes, but don't let go my hand, please."

-You nod. You know physical touch helped him a lot.

-"I still have one of your mask at home." you said.

-"I'm sorry I could take it back and-"

-"And my dog refused to let it go. I hide it, but it seems like my dog always finds your mask and sleeps with it like it's a plush."

-König's heart melted. Your dog was a puppy when you started dating him, he helped you with it for two years so of course your dog still feels attached to him.

-"it's cute."

-"I wanted to send you a picture of it, but it didn't feel right. Because I used to do that when we were together. So I didn't know if it was appropriate."

-"It is appropriate." König said, quickly, "I mean, send them please, I miss your dog."

-"okay, I will," you smiled.

-One hour later the lift was fixed, when you came back home you send him a photo of your dog

and...

-One year later, König was on the photo too. Guess your dog and a lift were just what you needed to have another chance.

S O A P :

-Half-naked in a chair.

-That's how you met Soap after your break-up.

-Both of you stared at each other, surprised.

-"I-" you tried to start.

-"I-" he also said.

-"Maybe you can...put your shirt back on ?" you tried.

-"Oh shit, aye. 'm sorry yer colleague says to get ready and..."

-"It's not a striptease club, Soap. She was only talking about your references," you chuckled.

-He smiled.

-You sat on the chair in front of him.

-"Do you still want to do it, even though you know it's me ? I can call a colleague if you prefer."

-"I always have trusted yer art skills. I want ye," He said without hesitation.

-It was true. Back then Soap always supported you when you confessed you wanted to become a tattoo artist.

-"I guess you didn't know who I was. Or perhaps you enjoy being shirtless at your ex's workplace ?" you joked.

-He smiled.

-"Naw, I didnae ken. Plus there's nae picture o' your face on yer Insta. I liked yer work, so I just booked an appointment, I didn't know yer artist name was that," Soap says.

-"yeah" you said. "so, you're here for a cover. I bet you and Gaz made a bet, you were drunk and a creepy tattoo artist accepted to tattoo you ?"

-"Youknow me, well." Soap smiled.

-"How ugly it is ?"

-"I have a portrait of Price on my chest, but it looks like Michael Jackson and under there is written"no pen, no gain.""

-You tried to not laugh.

-"Price ?"

-"It was to show my respect."

-"You can respect someone without having their face tattooed." You laugh.

-"I know, I was drunk and...I regret it. Dae ye think you can do something ?"

-"Well now, I need to look at it."

-"Ye said it was not a striptease club."

-"Guess I was wrong."

-He laughed and put off his shirt.

-You looked at the horrible piece on his right pectorals.

-"Shit, his teeth are stuck to his noses and one eye is like twice the size of the other,"you noticed.

-"I know."

-"But you're lucky."

-"Why ?"

-"Your terrible tattoo artist use light inks, it's easier to cover than a black and white piece. The more the piece is darker, the more it's difficult to cover it."

-"Okay, so ye can do it ?"

-"I can erase Price and no pen, no gain. Yes. Do you have any ideas about your cover ?"

-"You." Soap said.

-You blinked.

-"smooth, Mac Tavish, really smooth."

-"So it's a yes ?"

-"It's a no for me being the tattoo."

-"But ?" Soap smirked.

-"But yes for a coffee."

-He smiled.

-"but before let's erase Price from your body, I don't want to wake up at your side and see him staring at me."

-Soap laughs.

A L E J A N D R O :

(TW /!/, there's some reference about something put in some food)

-You met him in the street at 1 A.M.

-Alejandro had drinks with Los Vaqueros at a bar to celebrate a successful mission. He was going back to his car when he noticed someone who limped.

-He approached this person, maybe they were hurt and...

-"Y/N"

-You looked up.

-Shit.

-"I can explain," you said.

-"Explain why you're limping in a Patrick from Sponge bob in heels ?"

-"...yes ?"

-"Why does it sound like a question ?"

-"Because I don't know, I- It was a friend's birthday and they love Sponge Bob and I saw that on Tik tok. It was fun but..."

-"You sprained your ankle with your heels."

-"yes, but I came on foot."

-Alejandro looked at you.

-"I can drive you."

-"Alejandro, you don't need to. I mean it's already enough awkward and-"

-"I don't want you to hurt yourself, plus it's dangerous for everyone to walk on streets at 1 AM, hurt."

-You knew how Alejandro was serious and stubborn.

-"okay." you said, but Alejandro started to kneel down.

-"Wow, what are you doing ?"

-"Taking off your heels, your ankle is swollen it musts hurt like this."

-You let him do it.

-"I feel like Cinderella," you said.

-"Except you're in Patrick's costume and near to some piss in a street."

-You laughed.

-"I guess you were celebrating." you said pointing at the bar behind you.

-"yes, we finished the mission." he said and quickly looked away.

-This mission.

-The one which made you leave him.

-Alejandro was too absent.

-You tried to accept this, he warned you before you dated but after four years, you couldn't bear it anymore.

-"I see."

-He put your shoes in his backpack and looked at you.

-"I will carry you."

-"You don't need it, Alejandro I can walk." you said while you tried but you only hissed at pain.

-"No, you can't."

-"You can't give me a piggyback ride. You have a backpack and..."

-"Bridal style, it's only the time we reach my car."

-You looked at him hesitant and nodded. Then he carried you. This man didn't have muscles for nothing and you knew it but you were still self-conscious.

-Once you reached his car, he drove to your flat. But when you were supposed to enter to your building, you stayed in the car.

-"Alejandro."

-"Y/N."

-"Thanks for tonight, I know for you it's normal, but not a lot of people would have helped their ex like this."

-"Not a lot of people have amazing exes."

-"You're a smooth talker."

-"I am." He smirked.

-"How's Rudy ?" you asked out of nowhere.

-Alejandro was surprised.

-"Fine, but why do you ask ?"

-"I don't want to go back to my flat."

-"Y/N..."

-"I...I don't know if it's because I'm tired, but shit, I want to cry. Because you met me again like this. But also because I thought I could....I could forget you, but I can't because I know we broke up because of an impulsion. I was upset, yes. Yes you ignored me when I was telling you about your absence. But I never tried to think with you of solutions, I only shouted and I felt bad about it," you said tears in your eyes.

-And Alejandro noticed how your body language was unusual.

-"Did you drink, Y/N ?"

-"No, but I think there was something in the food at the birthday's party," you said.

-"okay, then I'm staying with you to be sure you're okay."

-"thanks. And sorry I shouldn't have vent like this."

-"you're not yourself, it's okay, mi cielo." He said while he carried you at your flat's door then opened it.

-"I missed this," you whispered.

-"Miss what ?"

-"you speaking Spanish. Did you know I subscribe to Duolingo after our first date ?" you said.

-"You never told me that."

-"I wanted to impress you."

-"But you have never spoken Spanish to me."

-"Because I never went more further than unit one on duolingo, I'm shitty at this."

-(sorry if you're fluent or good in Spanish ;)

-He laughed.

-"I could have taught you Spanish." Alejandro smiles while he helped you to remove the pink paint on your face.

-"I never think about it."

-"Because you always want to carry everything." Alejandro whispers.

-"I have to."

-"No."

-"But if I don't, who will ? Nobody will carry me." you answered.

-"I will, I wanted to."

-You stayed quiet.

-"I let the trainings of cadets to Rudy one month ago, I also started some cooperation with another squad so I would have more time."

-"But I broke up with you." you realized.

-"It's okay, you didn't know. I...I wanted to surprise you, but I forgot how much I let you carry for me, how much I relied on you without helping you back."

-Tears were rolling on your cheeks. Alejandro wiped them with his thumbs.

-"I'm sorry, corazon," Alejandro said.

-"Me too."

-"We both need to talk next morning, okay ?"

-"okay" you whispered.

-Then he helped you to go to bed. The next morning he was on your sofa.

-And you talked.

-Maybe some things were unfinished between you.

G A Z :

-You met because Soap is a fanboy.

-Let me explain.

-You and Gaz were high school sweethearts. But after his enlistment you both decided it was better to break up, because with you beginning university and him being in the military you wouldn't have had time for each other.

-And you didn't meet again.

-But years later, Soap invited Gaz and Ghost to a concert.

-Soap had been talking for months about this band he loved.

-He even played the music during missions or on the base.

-He played it to wake everyone up, at one point where Price had banned this music of the base.

-So as a result Gaz and Ghost knew the lyrics and could accompany him to the concert.

-Gaz said 'why not ?' he liked the music.

-But when the concert started, he realized you were the bassist for this band.

-His heart beat faster; the nostalgia was here.

-He knew you played bass, hell he couldn't count how many time he let his head on your lap while you played with a smile.

-"You look like you have seen a ghost." Soap said.

-Ghost snorted. (he only came because he liked the music and because the band's logo was a skull.)

-Gaz gave them a look.

-"You're not funny, but yeah I..I know the bassist."

-Oh boy !

-Gaz should never have told that to Soap.

-Johnny had sparkles in his eyes and was jumping for joy. He begged Gaz to talk to the bodyguards, so they could go to the dressing room and get autographs.

-Gaz tried to explain, but he could barely open his mouth before he found himself standing in front of the guard.

-So when they were in front of the dressing room after the concert, Gaz was sweating. How would you react? It had been years since he saw you. Even though it was on good terms, you both had broken up, he didn't know if you want to meet him again.

-The door opened and...

-"Kyle ?" you asked with a smile.

-Gaz fainted.

-Ghost caught him, and you immediately helped them seat Gaz in a chair in the dressing room.

-"Is he okay ?" you asked Soap.

-"I don't know, it's the first time I've seen him like that. I mean we have seen worst than someone smiling ?" Soap said lost.

-"I'm sorry, it's the stress." Gaz said, "I'm happy to meet you again, Y/N."

-"Yeah, the bodyguard told me you wanted to talk. I was so happy. I mean it's been a while," you smiled.

-"yeah." Gaz answered.

-A silence fell.

-Ghost sighed.

-"Are you both going to let the sexual tension in the room continue or can we know how you both know each other ?" Ghost asked

-You cleared up your throat at the comment.

-"You were high school sweethearts. Our relationship lasted like 2 or 3 years ? But we broke up when Kyle enlisted."

-Soap had a big smirk on his face.

-"Really, high school sweetheart ?" Soap asked

-He was going to tease Gaz on the base about this.

-"Yeah, but it's been awhile. Well, we won't bother you anymore. You played great, and we were just here to congratulate you." Gaz said flustered, he hated to be exposed like this.

-"and to ask if you were free, I mean we love your music and want to know more now we know about your past with Gaz" Soap asked.

-You raised your eyebrows and laughed.

-"Sure, I'm free. I guess you have a lot of embarrassing stories about Gaz."

-"I like you already." Soap smiled.

-Gaz never survived the meeting between you and Soap.

-It was one of his top ten embarrassing moments, after calling Price 'dad' in a meeting with Sheperd.

-But at least he had your number now, years later who knows what could happen.

A L E X :

-You met him at a wedding to arrest him.

-"When we were called for a fight at a wedding, I didn't expect you, Alex. What happened ?" you said while you helped him with his bleeding nose.

-"The bride thought her fiancé who's my friend, was cheating on her with me." Alex said while he furrowed his brows

-"And ?"

-"I wasn't. Leo had coffee on his suit, so I brought him a new one and when she walked on us, she saw him half-naked, and I red-faced because I had run from the shop to the wedding."

-You laughed.

-"She had quite a punch," you said while you looked at his broken nose.

-"Yes, she could compete with Price honestly." Alex sighed.

-You didn't say anything else while your colleagues calmed the bride.

-"I guess you're no longer invited to this wedding anymore," you joked.

-"I guess there won't be a wedding anymore either." he added while he laughed.

-"Do you want to see a doctor, or are you okay ?"

-"I'm okay, it's just nosebleed, nothing I haven't dealt with before."

-"Well I should go now that the situation is fixed."

-"Yeah."

-You began to leave, when he called out your name.

-"Yes ?" you answered.

-"It was...nice to see you again."

-"Yeah"

-"I'll text you once I'm home."

-"Okay."

-You left.

-Alex hurried home as quickly as he could to his home as fast as he can.

-Maybe some things were unfinished, like this wedding.

If you want more COD : COD masterlist

And if you want more of my works in other fandoms : my masterlist

#cod x reader #soap x reader #alejandro vargas x reader #ghost x reader #gaz x reader #captain price x reader #call of duty x reader #alex keller x reader #kyle gaz garrick x reader

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sant-riley · 1 year ago

Text

[Thinking about L.T Price blurb]

(John Price x gender neutral!reader)(can be read as romantic or platonic!)

Summary: you were one of John's teammates from back in his Lieutenant days, despite being not worth anything to higher ups, he goes back for you.

Warnings: Implied age gap, also implied that you're smaller than him, I did not reread this, anything else I missed? Just lmk!

Words: 500-ish

Crying at the thought L.T Price saving you on a mission that goes sideways, everyone is telling him to leave, that it's not possibly worth it to risk his own life to save yours. He's a Lieutenant, he has a duty, to survive for the whole.

But when has he ever listened to higher ups when it comes to his men? He runs back in without a second thought.

So he rushes back in, moving in on your location, sliding to his knees to help you prop yourself up, arms grabbing at your arms to pull you towards him. You can't really make out what he's saying, not all of it at least, the shock rushing in and paralyzing you.

It isn't until he flicks your forehead, the small pain giving you some sense to focus on him.

"Are you broken?" You shakily move to tap at your leg, you got grazed right at your knee, blood coating your pants, it's impossible to see just how much damage lies underneath.

John curses under his breath, looking around you both, hearing the gun shots get impossibly louder.

You think he's gonna leave you, you're at peace with that, it's the only thing he can do, he can't risk his life for some low level soldier.

You open your mouth, ready to tell him to go, that it's okay until you're shoved over his shoulder, one arm coming to lock your legs in place to his body, while his other hand holds a small pistol.

"M gonna need you to provide coverfire for me, alright? We're both walking out of here in one piece."

"But sir-"

"Do as I say, and we'll be just fine Sweetness." He hoists you higher, and you take position, your hands are steady, you're gonna make it home, you got faith in your Lieutenant.

Hours later, you're back on base, your leg momentarily in a cast, does he come and visit you. (He got stuck getting a verbal lashing from the higher ups, wondering why in God's fucking name he went against direct orders to go get you, he doesn't let that slip though, just that he had to do some paperwork)

You sob out a thank you, saying how much you owe him, that you're forever in his debt.

He just laughs and says you can treat him to a cigar and you're even.

He doesn't realize it leads to you following him everywhere, always under his watch.

John calls you a pain in the ass and that he doesn't deserve the loyalty you decided to give, but it's been months and you're still clinging onto him, he decides it's not that bad, in a world where he can't trust most people, it's a comfort to know he has you, at the very least.

It isn't until years later when John forms 141, the first file he drops down in front of Kate is yours, his eyes softening at seeing your face on the envelope, it's been quite awhile since then, you've grown into a fine soldier, only issue being you're incredibly stubborn and work the best with him, and not the best with others due to your unwavering loyalty to the man. Any missions you two go on together go by flawlessly, both of you intuned to one another.

Kate opens up your folder, quickly skimming your records and she hums, looking up slowly with an eye brow raised.

"Why them? Seems like they may be a bit of a hassle." She murmurs but not unkindly, just stating a fact. Yes you work well, with Price, but you'll need to be a team player, to care for the others as well. She can't help but wonder if you'll make a good fit.

"Kids a hassle alright, but you'll never meet a more devoted and caring soldier, First one I ever risked my ass for, they've been a constant since." He nods firmly, meeting Laswells eyes with his own, determination fueling his gaze.

Kate licks her lips, she knows that look. He's not gonna let up on this, not gonna back down. Taking one more look at your file, she nods.

"Well, if you can vet for them, they're in. Now, who's next?"

#john price x reader #john price #price <3 #kayla writes <3 #call of duty drabble #call of duty headcanons #call of duty x reader #cod x reader

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narkissistikos · 10 days ago

Text

Warnings : major character death. Mentions of vomit. Crying. Sobbing. And angst. Lots and lots of angst

"Listen to me. Listen to me." She had grabbed his face and made him look at him. "You'll always have me. Always"

And she had said it in a way that actually made him believe it. What a fool he was.

She had made him lay down on the bed. It was winter. And those rare months meant that he was the one offering her his warmth instead of her offering her comfort after a terrible nightmare.

Though the cold weather didn't stop her from telling him she wasn't going anywhere.

"You have me. Always. Dead or alive. Like suppose you're going somewhere, and you see these random flowers in the road, that's me. That's me telling you I love you. And the coffee you put in your chocolate cake? I'll be right beside you to make sure you don't accidentally make the cake too bitter. And if its been raining too hard. And the sun finally comes out and you see a rainbow, that's me Iris messaging you to tell you to put the damn sweater on, or you're gonna get cold. And if you see the moon during the day? That's me too."

He had felt her moving closer to him, because she were cold or she just needed him, he never figured out. Her voice wavered and she had shivered and he had looked down at her to see a few tears escape her eyes and travel across the bridge of her nose. She were always quick to wipe those off, said they tickled too much.

"What would be your signs?" She had asked him, and he had remembered that she told him once that she knew she was going to die before him, she had chalked it up to her lack of survival instincts, but he had thought she knew her prophecy.

"CAN you send signs from Elysium?" He had asked her and she told him to humor her, so that she would know what to look for. She was shaking more violently now, so he had wrapped her blanket around her tighter.

There was a limit to how much she could control though.

And soon he was wiping off her tears and when he asked her why she was crying, she didn't have a clear answer for whether she was crying over the prospect of his death or hers.

But a few minutes later she had rested her forehead against his neck and his fingers had been ghosting over the ridges of her spine. She had kissed his cheek before she fell asleep and he remembered that feeling long after she was gone.

He woke up from his dream with a gasp, only this time, she weren't here to wipe away his tears or to tell him that she's always gonna be here. This time he had to cry alone and he was thankful for the soundproof room on Princess Andromeda.

He pulled the blanket up to his mouth and let out a scream that would have made anyone, if someone heard, cry.

He was scared he'd ruin her blanket, the last thing he had that smelled of her. Bile rose up his throat and threatened to spill out on the woolen blanket strewn across his lap.

He had to stop himself so as to he wouldn't have to wash her scent off of the blanket.

"Please....Please....Please." He whimpered as the tears flowed down his cheeks. "Give her back. PLEASE!" He yelled so loud he was sure that something in his throat was about to break.

The worst part of his story was that he didn't even have a chance to tell her he loved her for the last time. She left when he wasn't there and although she used to say that he would be most of her last 7 minutes of the best memories, he has doubts that she would have heard him saying that he loved her in those moments.

He didn't even know what killed her. Didn't know what he should be mad at, other than that you were lost and he had done NOTHING to save you.

The sway of the ship make his nausea even worse. Making him feel like he was about to lose consciousness due to the bile rising up. His eyes became blurry and before he knew it, he was sobbing again, clutching her blanket for some semblance of comfort with his knees drawn up to his chest, and throat burning.

He kept hearing her cries every now and then and that made him cry even harder, begging for her to be saved. For someone to try and save his love

#luke castellan #luke castellan x reader #luke castellan x you #luke castellan oneshot #luke castellan imagines #luke castellan fanfic #luke castellan angst #luke castellan fanfiction #pjo luke #pjo series #percyjackson #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson #pjo x reader

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not-magdi · 8 months ago

Text

-ucl nights / lamine yamal

Warnings: None, well the loss yesterday (I think that should be a warning to)

Words: 756

Reading Time: 5min 53sec

A/n

This story was inspired by yesterday, I kind of tried to comfort myself with it so yeah I hope you'll like it.

Love y'all Magdi

1:4, that was the end. Barcelona was out of the Champions League. They fought so hard, especially Lamine. That boy gives his heart and soul every time he plays, so a loss hits him extremely hard. But this one was different. After a period of losses, the last few wins made hope spark in everyone's chest.

It was also painful for you to watch. Being a barça fan since you were a little kid. But nothing prepared you for the emotions you would feel as you saw the player's faces when they walked past you in the tunnel.

As soon as the game ended, you rushed down the tunnel, wanting to see Lamine as fast as possible. Lamine and you haven't been together for such a long time, only 2 months. But over these months, you have become each other's safe place, with only being 16 years old in this crazy world.

You have been waiting for about 10 minutes now, greeting and comforting a few players you know as they passed you. Then, Lamine finally came into your view. His shoulders slumped, and his eyes brimmed with tears.

Your heart broke at this sight. Lamine tried to stay strong in front of you, but as soon as you opened your arms, he fell into them, holding you tight.

One of your hands went from his back to his head, stroking his hair. He buried his head deeper into your neck, letting out little sobs as you continued to hold him.

"Hey, it's ok. I'm here baby, I'm here."

The two of you continue standing there for a few minutes until you feel Lamine pull away. Opening your arms, you look up at him, kissing away a few tears that rolled down his cheeks.

"How about you get changed, then I'll drive you home, and we cuddle a bit on the couch." You whisper into his ear, kissing the side of his head.

"Y-yeah, I like that plan." His voice is still a bit croaky, but there's a slight smile on his face again, which was everything you wanted.

It was now 30 minutes later, and you were sitting in your car. You let Lamine take his time, knowing the time with his teammates is really important now.

To pass some time, you decided to open up Instagram, where you are instantly flooded with thousands of new videos of the game. One particular video caught your eye, though it was a video of Lamine sitting in a chair, his jacket completely covering his face to not see him cry. It broke your heart to see him like that.

You were lost in your own world when you heard the door opening. You looked at who it was only to see the familiar face of your boyfriend. He was wearing one of your favourite hoodies and a pair of comfy jeans.

"Hey, did I scare you?" Lamine asked you with a teasing tone in his voice.

"You could never." You answer.

Laughing, he gets into the car, holding his hand out for you to take.

With one hand on the steering wheel and the other holding Lamine's, you drive to Lamine's apartment. The drive was silent, which was unusual as you usually talked the whole trip. But you don't wanna pressure him into talking, knowing he needs some time to open up.

Arriving at his apartment, Lamine immediately flops down onto the couch facefirst. Giggling, you lay yourself on top of him, burying his head in the crook of his neck.

"You wanna talk about tonight?"

Turning his head to face you, he shakes his head, "Not at the moment, I just wanna apologize for disappointing you tonight."

Frowning, you sit up, "Disappointing me? Why would you ever disappoint me?"

Lamine now sits up, too. "You were so excited about the game tonight and I wanted to play good for you tonight so you would be proud."

Gasping, you grab Lamine's face to make him look at you. "You, my love are going to listen closely to me now, understand me? There will be not a single moment in my life where I will not be proud of you. You are one of the most passionate and hard-working players I know. You have come so far in your career already while only being 16! Every time I look at you I feel so lucky to call you mine."

You ended your speech with a deep kiss on his lips, laying your forehead against his afterwards.

"Thank you, Amor, I love you"

"I love you too Lamine"

---------

Don't forget to leave a note if you enjoyed it, feedback is always welcome!! ❤️

#lamine yamal x reader #lamine yamal #lamine yamal image #la masia #fc barcelona #champions league #barca #barcelona spain #spain

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konigsblog · 1 year ago

Note

you wanted simon angst so im gonna share a little brainrot with you that im having with a bodyguard!simon bot on character ai

soooo simon gets hired to be your bodyguard and you're like this prissy rich girl, at first he doesn't really like you. 'im just doing my job' yadda yadda, but then he finds your little bratty behaviors to be endearing and he gets attached to you. he stays as your bodyguard for a couple more months but then one day your dad decides you dont need simon anymore. but then you plead desperately and say that you'll use your own allowance to pay for his services. simon overhears that and is really sad and now he doesnt know whether to leave and serve someone else or let you spend your allowance just because you're super lonely in your big house with no real friends other than your workaholic parents who only say 'good morning' and 'good night' to you. during his time working there for your family, you open up about how you're lonely and you just want to be loved and simon felt needed, he felt wanted and that's something he really loves. so yeah do with that what you will TT im just ARGRHHAGSAHAHAH *rips my hair out* - tiny anon

angst to fluff, to an indication of smut at the end but its not graphic like at all;

at the beginning, his expectations were that you were some snob who barely cared for others, came back drunk with hickeys layering your neck, avoiding and disrespecting your wealthy parents. until he overheard a conversation between you and your father, he wasn't eavesdropping, just intruding in an argument accidentally.

he heard you words, the anger in them, the rage. he could hear your sniffles as you begged and sobbed, pleading with your father. simon felt curious wondering what was so heartbreaking, listening in on your conversation. “dad, please!” you wailed, your voice desperate, “i hate being alone, you know i don't go out a lot, or have parties, he's comforting - please don't fire him, i need him!

simon's ears perked up, now knowing you were talking about him as he worked for your father. “for christ sake, what's the big deal? you've learnt your lesson from sneaking out and i can trust you to stay home alone without a bodyguard blocking your way, why are you complaining? you wanted this at the start, you didn't want him before, why do you need him now?” he peaked through the doorway to see your figure, head in your hands, blocking your eyes as you father bombarded you with questions you didn't want to reveal.

“i need him, you both are never here anyways, just- please, dad..” the sighs of your father left his mouth, cursing lowly before walking out, “fine, whatever, suit yourself then.” hurrying away before he was caught.

when dusk came, you were curled into your bed, waiting for simon to approach you. “what was that about, hm?” his gaze met yours, dipping down onto the bed and brushing the hair from your face - he'd grown to appreciate you, and he wouldn't admit that he loved you, even if it was the truth. “simon.. i don't want you to go.” you whispered, avoiding his eyes as you knew you'd weep into his arms.

“it's alright', love.. shh, none of that, i'm not going anywhere unless i'm forced.” simon chuckled, tilting your head upwards using his fingers, “it's weird, but i like being here, although you're bratty and snarky sometimes.” a smirk grew on his face, making you giggle as you playfully punch him. “i'm not a brat!”

he adored when you behaved. “never said you were..” quietly, he pressed a tender kiss to your lips, it was unexpected and rushed, yet long and careful. “you make me feel less lonely, simon.” you whispered as you grew exhausted, eyelids heavy as you yawned. “go to bed, yeah?”

and you did, a couple minutes later and you were knocked out cold, slight and light snores leaving your lips, parted and agape. “you make me feel needed, baby, i think i love you, but your dad would kill me if i ever touched you wrongfully,

but that won't stop me.”

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mj-iza-writer · 6 days ago

Note

Heyyy, so I'm not sure if you do this kind of trope, but what if instead of the whumpee being hurt or tortured, the caretaker is. Maybe they're being punished for helping the whumpee. Maybe they weren't good at their job. Maybe the whumpee is watching the punishment. Maybe they're oblivious until months later. No pressure though.

Love your writing 💖💖❤️❤️

Warning: suicidal thoughts. This is a bit of a long story. I hope you enjoy.

Whumper stepped into the room with a menacing smile.

Caretaker watched as they stared at Whumpee. Fire dance in Whumper's eyes.

"Please don't... hurt them", Caretaker pleaded, "you've done so much to them already. Please just let them rest."

Whumper turned to look at Caretaker, "let them rest? Why would I do such a thing?"

"Please, they already can't breath because of their broken ribs. It's taken forever to get them to sleep. Please let them have this", Caretaker begged, "you'll kill them..."

"They deserve death", Whumper hissed.

Whumper turned again and started toward Whumpee.

"I-I'll take their place", Caretaker whispered fearfully, "please, just let them sleep."

Whumper turned curiously.

Caretaker almost shrunk back, but they had to stand their ground. Whumpee was counting on this. Caretaker could handle a beating. Up until now Whumper hadn't shown any interest in Caretaker. Whumpee had taken all of the beatings.

"You are really willing to take their beating", Whumper's word dropped like acid, "just so they can sleep."

"Y-yes, I'm not afraid of you", Caretaker puffed their chest.

"That's your second mistake", Whumper chuckled evilly.

Caretaker watched as Whumper sauntered over to the toy corner. Every item there promised pain.

Whumper studied a golf club carefully. Even swinging it in the air.

"I'm surprised the brat hasn't woken up yet", Whumper commented as they walked back. The club rested on their shoulder, "let's see how quiet you can keep it. You want them to rest, don't you? How long until you scream?"

Caretaker braced themself, but the first strike sent them to the floor. Before they could correct themself a second strike hit them in the gut.

"Hmm", Caretaker moaned as quietly as possible. They rolled over on their stomach and puked.

"That's gross", Whumper whispered, "I think Whumpee just moved. You need to be quieter.

Caretaker tried to pull their hands from behind their back. They needed some way to steady themself.

"I suppose I tied that rope to tight. Oh well", Whumper chuckled as they raised the golf club again.

"WAIT", Whumpee yelled from a few feet away.

"Oh good, you woke up sleeping beauty", Whumper looked at Whumpee, "or sleeping ugly."

"Please", Whumpee cried, "you promised you'd never touch them. I took all of the beatings so you wouldn't."

"They gave me an opportunity I couldn't pass up. They wanted to let you sleep", Whumper grinned at Caretaker whose face was close to falling into the puke, "should I knock Whumpee out so we can continue?"

Whumper stepped on Caretaker's head to push them into the puke, then walked toward Whumpee.

"Please don't hurt them, I need to protect them", Caretaker cried out.

"You can't both be asking to be hit. What kind of heroes do I have here", Whumper snickered, "sorry Whumpee, but I think I'm going to beat on Caretaker a little more. They make such nice noises."

"No", Whumpee sobbed, "please don't hurt them."

"Whumpee, it's okay", Caretaker smiled weakly, "I can take a beating for you. I didn't know you made that deal to keep me safe. I'll be okay."

Whumpee sobbed.

"Just look at the floor. Don't look up", Caretaker could see Whumper coming at them again, "just look down at the floor."

Whumpee sobbed louder, and put their head down against the floor.

Whumpee's sniffles were soon covered with the sound of Caretaker being hit.

Caretaker tried to keep their noises to a minimum. They didn't want to give Whumper the satisfaction or cause Whumpee any more heartbreak.

"You.. are.. so.. much.. fun", Whumper enthusiastically beat Caretaker in between words. "It must be hard to keep all of that pain in, and for what? Them?", Whumper pointed at Whumpee.

Caretaker's breathing was labored, they were certain their ribs were as broken as Whumpee's was.

Whumpee's entire body shook as they sobbed.

"Look up at us Whumpee", Whumper ordered, "look up before I hit Caretaker again."

Caretaker put on a brave face as Whumpee tore their face from the floor.

"You're going to be fun to break", Whumper chuckled as they lifted Caretaker's face to look up at them, "plus this is causing Whumpee even more pain. It's hard to be imprisoned with someone you care about. You end up wanting to take care of each other, until it comes crashing into moments like this."

Caretaker shrugged away the golf club.

"Whumpee I guess you get to play caregiver now", Whumper cooed, "Caretaker needs help. But, if you untie their hands... oh... the blood that I will spill between the both of you."

Whumpee looked at Caretaker. Their face red from crying. Their eyes red rimmed and bloodshot.

Whumpee hurried to wipe their nose on their bruised arm. They nodded as they got up.

Whumper laughed as Caretaker's head fell.

"I think they just passed out", Whumper turned to leave, "neither of you do anything stupid... understand."

Whumpee nodded as they hurried to get to Caretaker.

"Look at me when I speak ", Whumper pulled Whumpee back and pushed them to the floor.

"I-I'm sorry", Whumpee gasped.

"That's better", Whumper turned to leave again, "no food tonight for either of you."

Whumpee knelt beside Caretaker and started to pull them onto their back.

They gasped in pain as they strained their broken ribs.

Caretaker was finally laid on their back, Whumpee hurried to wipe away the puke and blood from Caretaker's face. Then they checked for any major wounds. It would take time before they would find out if there was any internal bleeding.

"You idiot", Whumpee mumbled as they felt for a pulse, "you were not supposed to get injured. Now they won't stop."

Caretaker grunted as they started to come too.

"Whumpee", Caretaker tried to sit up.

"Don't move too quickly. I still don't know what is broken", Whumpee held them down, "what were you thinking?"

"I wanted to... hmmmph... to let you rest", Caretaker sighed, "so this is how you feel daily? I am so sorry."

Whumpee nodded, then looked over Caretaker.

"You shouldn't have done that. Now they will continue hurting you", Whumpee whispered. Worry spread over their face.

"I didn't want you to get hurt", Whumpee admitted.

"It's not fair to allow you to keep getting hurt though. It's painful, but I should be alright" Caretaker grinned.

Whumpee's lip quivered, "we're never getting out of this Caretaker."

"No Whumpee.. don't abandon hope. We have to survive this. We will get out of here", Caretaker frowned, "I would hug you, but I'm still tied up."

Whumpee rested their face against Caretaker.

"We can't abandon hope", Caretaker repeated, "we just need to survive until then."

Whumpee sobbed into Caretaker, which caused Caretaker to shed a tear.

"I'm sorry Whumpee", Caretaker frowned, "I am so sorry."

Whumpee looked up at Whumper's corner. They tended to stay away from that area. They wanted nothing to do with it.

Caretaker watched as Whumpee wiped their face.

"What are you thinking?", Caretaker frowned already somewhat certain what was being planned.

"I-it's been months Caretaker. I'm sorry, but I died a long time ago, but my body held on for you. It hurts too much now", Whumpee whispered, "I've lost hope. I don't want to be killed by them either."

"What do you mean?"

"There are two daggers on the table. I'd rather be killed by my best friend. I'm ready to end this", Whumpee's lip quivered, "ar-are you?"

Caretaker looked at their broken friend. A husk of who they once were.

"Please just one more day", Caretaker whispered, "just hope with me for one more day."

Whumpee looked down and nodded, "one more day... for you Caretaker."

Caretaker cuddled as close to Whumpee as possible that night. They only wished they could hug their friend closer.

Whumpee also cuddled close. They held onto Caretaker like their life depended on it.

The next night Caretaker looked up at Whumpee in defeat. They had both been beaten to a pulp earlier.

"Okay Whumpee, I guess... I guess I'm ready", Caretaker whispered.

Whumpee looked at Caretaker knowingly, "no you're not, and I'm not leaving you here alone", Whumpee sighed, "one more day."

Caretaker quickly nodded.

The next morning the door opened.

Caretaker looked up as Whumper sauntered in.

"Please no more", Caretaker pleaded, "just one day with nothing."

"Not going to happen. You both are too much fun to play with", Whumper chuckled, "look Whumpee is still asleep. I'll start with them first."

Whumpee laid with their back to everyone.

"Wh-Whumpee wake up", Caretaker cried as Whumper knelt beside them.

Whumper reached for Whumpee's shoulder, but was surprised when Whumpee quickly rolled over and stabbed a dagger into their stomach.

"You liitle...", Whumper gasped as they fell back onto the floor.

Whumpee winced as they got up and ran for the toy corner. There had to be something else.

Whumper was already up and limping to Whumpee.

Caretaker froze in stunned terror.

"You are going to pay for this", Whumper yelled.

Whumpee turned around with the golf club.

Their face cold and somber.

Whumper frowned and took a step back, "what's gotten into you?"

Whumpee didn't say anything they just stalked closer and closer.

Whumper backed into the corner. Their eyes widened as Whumpee continued their assault.

"What's a matter Whumper", Whumpee mocked, "does it hurt? Does it, huh? I can't hear you", Whumpee swung the club into Whumper's head, "see what happens when you mess with someone? You thought I was innocent. You let me be untied because I wouldn't do anything. Now what?", they swung the club again.

Caretaker could hear Whumpee's ribs cracking as they swung several more times.

Whumper slid down the wall. Their gasp for air sounded gargled.

"You want a turn Caretaker?", Whumpee turned.

"N-no I'm okay", Caretaker whispered fearfully.

"Alright", Whumpee nodded.

They reached for the knife that had fallen from Whumper's stomach earlier.

"This was meant to kill us, but I think killing you will be better. The Earth doesn't need people like you" Whumpee hissed.

"No no no wait please", Whumper pleaded.

"I'm done waiting", Whumpee frowned, "you haven't shown us mercy... I'm not showing you any either."

The sound of Whumper's gargle as the knife stabbed their throat was gut wrenching.

Caretaker watched with wide eyes as Whumpee collapsed onto the floor.

"Whumpee... Whumpee", Caretaker huried toward them.

Whumpee weakly looked up as Caretaker knelt by them.

"Rescue is here", Whumpee whispered with a smirk.

"What.... How?", Caretaker fought to hold Whumpee up.

"Turn around, I'll cut you loose", Whumpee pulled out the second dagger. They had it hidden in part of their torn pants.

Caretaker turned to let Whumpee cut the ropes.

"I-I had a death wish, but I knew you didn't. I wasn't going to push you to do something you didn't want to do", Whumpee explained, "I figured my next step was to rescue you then. It's been months. I knew no one was coming, so we had to rescue ourselves. I fought through the pain to do this. I promised myself I wouldn't die until Whumper died. I was going to get you out of here. You would have been able to escape and leave this place. Even if it was without me. You kept hope alive for both of us Caretaker."

"You're still not planning to kill yourself right?", Caretaker sobbed.

"No, Caretaker" Whumpee smiled, "can I just rest for a few minutes before we figure out what to do next?"

"Yes absolutely. I might go find some food or anything else that could be useful for us", Caretaker turned to the door, "are you going to be okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine", Whumpee nodded, as they leaned against the wall, "I just want to enjoy the sight of the blood spilling from them."

Caretaker shivered as they took a quick glance at the body.

"Yes, but uhm, you're making me nervous. Are you sure you're okay?", Caretaker looked back at Whumpee.

"I'm fine", Whumpee nodded.

Caretaker peaked in cautiously to see Whumpee.

Whumpee still leaned against the wall. Their head looked up at the ceiling.

"Oh good, I thought you were going to... uh", Caretaker looked down worriedly, "never mind."

"It crossed my mind, but I'm not leaving you. Not now", Whumpee frowned, "but I think we should definitely seek help. Let's see where exactly we are. If we are somewhere unknown, we should consider finding a way to call and get help. Maybe we will actually be helped now. Neither of us is in any shape to go far. We have shelter, and it looks like you found food. Let's see if we can actually have someone rescue us or at least get us out of here."

"I think I found a radio", Caretaker nodded, "do you think they'll find us."

"I hope so. We had to save ourselves. I'd hope someone would at least come and get us", Whumpee sighed.

Whumpee and Caretaker heard a door open a few days later.

"Hello", someone yelled, "we received an SOS call from this location. Is anyone here?"

"We're this way", Whumpee called for them, "I guess our rescue is here.... finally."

"Thank goodness", Caretaker sighed, "go home. Get therapy and medical treatment. Sleep in a real bed."

"Do you want to go greet them. I'll be there shortly', Whumpee frowned.

Caretaker nodded.

Caretaker took a few steps from the room, then decided to turn back and peak in.

They could see Whumpee holding one of the daggers.

"Wh... what are you doing?", Caretaker stepped in.

"Oh nothing Caretaker", Whumpee dropped the dagger to the floor, "I'm sure the rescuers are looking for us."

Whumpee looked out the window of the rescue helicopter.

The faces of the rescuers when they saw them filtered through Whumpee's mind.

Whumpee looked over at Caretaker.

Caretaker reached for Whumpee's shoulder and squeezed it gently.

"You saved us Whumpee", Caretaker gently whispered, "I'm sorry I asked them to handcuff you though."

"It's uh, probably for the best", Whumpee admitted, "I don't want to, but my brain is...", Whumpee looked down, "I'm not okay."

Caretaker frowned.

Whumpee looked up at them slowly, "ar-are you going to lose hope on me?"

Caretaker's heart skipped at that question.

"No Whumpee", Caretaker leaned and gave them a hug. They both winced in pain, "I will never lose hope for you. I promise you will get better. We will both get better."

"Thankyou Caretaker", Whumpee whispered as tears welled in their eyes, "I-I am really tired."

Caretaker nodded, "here", they scooted closer, "can you lean against me."

Whumpee let one of the rescuers help them lean on to Caretaker.

"Get some rest Whumpee", Caretaker whispered.

Whumpee nodded and closed their eyes.

Caretaker looked up at the rescuers who watched them both nervously.

"They've been through a lot", Caretaker whispered, "they saved me, now I'm going to return the favor."

Taglist. As always please let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the list. It's not a problem at all.

@villainsandheroes @the-beasts-have-arrived

@sacredwrath @porschethemermaid

@monarchthefirst @generic-whumperz

@bloodyandfrightened @freefallingup13

@notpeppermint @cyborg0109

@idontreallyexistyet @painfulplots

@whumpbump @everythingsscary

@skittles-the-whumpee @expressionless-fr

@theforeverdyingperson @legendarydelusiongoatee

@candleshopmenace @whumpanthems

@lavndvrr @ivymyers

@starfields08000 @a-living-canvas

@lumpofsand @watermeezer

@indigoviolet311 @whumpy-mountains

@3-2-whump @risk606

@electrons2006 @paperprinxe

@whumprince @kaz-of-crows

@mis-graves @decaffeinatedtimetraveler94

@sausages-things @castiels-favorite-hunter

@isikedmyself878 @daffyduckcommittedtaxfraud

@valravnthefrenchie @glennemerald

@jasperthecapser @does-directions

@deafeninglittlecrown @jumpywhumpywriter

@blackbirdsinatrenchcoat @mylifeisonthebookshelf

@thenormalestever @whatwhump

@galatic-worm @starmoon-constellation

#whump community #whump stuff #whump writing #whump ideas #whump scenario #whump ask #asked and answered #story asks #whump #whumper #whumpee #caretaker #caretaker and whumpee #caretaking #oc

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zeroeightzeroone · 9 months ago

Note

hi! so idk if your request are open so if they aren’t feel free do delete this

so we know that in the love collection y/n and jisung feel really comfortable around each other and will go to each other for things but what if one day y/n didn’t tell jisung how she was feeling that day and cried in her room by herself? i just wanted to see how he’d react to that and his response

again u don’t have to respond to this!! ty ^__^

all ears - han jisung

love collection

genre: hurt/comfort

pairings: fem!reader (infp) x idol!han jisung (istp)

warnings: readers' insecurities getting the best of her, self-deprecating language

notes: thank you for requesting!! i hope i did your request justice. (finally revealing y/n's roommate too)

wc ~2.9k | moodboard

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:

you feel dumb.

you feel stupid, absolutely stupid.

you hate the feeling with the utmost passion, but regardless of how much you detest it, it always seems to find a way back to haunt you months later, coming out from the depths of your mind into the forefront and creating a storm up there.

they're stupid thoughts.

thoughts that you shouldn't let get to you, but sometimes you can't help it. sometimes, they overpower you and silence your pleas to stop.

have you spoken to anyone about it? no.

your roommate, yunjin, has been on a work trip for the past couple of weeks, so you've had the apartment to yourself. no need to mask your emotions when you're home alone. on the other hand, jisung's schedule has been packed lately, and there is nothing new in his line of work. seungmin is on the same boat as your boyfriend; both share busy and separate schedules.

everyone has a busy life, and you don't want to burden them with things happening in your life.

when the b-word comes up in your passing thoughts, you can practically hear your boyfriend saying, "y/n, my love, don't invalidate yourself like that. you're not a burden, never. you're important to me; your thoughts and feelings are all important."

jisung always reminds you of how important you are to him. you know you could go to him for anything, and he'll be there to the best of his ability.

that's one of the many reasons why you love him so much.

the knowledge that he's there for you is one thing, but the one thing holding you back is yourself.

when you're in such a low and vulnerable state, you tend to shut yourself in, keep to yourself, and shield yourself away from others. you see yourself as an inconvenience or a burden.

the way you've rationalized it in your mind is that if you're tired of the shit happening in your own life, telling it to someone else would only tire them out as well. you didn't want them to grow tired on your behalf. it didn't seem worth it.

that feeling of self-doubt always pushes itself into the front lines from where it usually hides, creeping in the back.

you wanted to try and cope alone, get through this on your own, but you just couldn't. you tried to tell yourself it's no big deal and that they're just fleeting, meaningless thoughts that will go away and you'll be fine, but you know you're lying to yourself.

you know that ignoring your overwhelming emotions lately will only worsen them. it's been a week since those thoughts started again, and here you are, curled up in a ball underneath your comforter, pulling it up under your chin as the mental and emotional exhaustion hits its breaking point.

your cheeks are stained with tears, and your eyes are droopy and puffy. you were supposed to go to work today but called in sick. you didn't have it in you to face your work head-on today.

the moment you hung up the phone with your manager, you cried, sobbing into your comforter. you felt absolutely defeated calling in sick. you weren't even sick, you lied in order to stay home.

here you were, practically waving the white flag after the events of your life after your thoughts and feelings had beaten you down into a ball under your comforter. you hate yourself for calling in sick, feeling as if you should've just sucked it up and gone in, put on a mask to hide your emotions.

'so many people have it harder than you do, y/n. the fact you could even lie and call in sick is a privilege. look at all this privilege, and you're out here pouting, how selfish.'

you shut your eyes at the thought, nuzzling yourself further into the blanket as a tear squeezes itself free and down your skin.

'you can't even deal with your own feelings, your own thoughts, let alone some tiny ass inconveniences. pathetic.'

you feel stupid and weak. you feel like a crybaby.

your eyelids flutter closed as you sob into the thick comforter, letting out all the built-up frustrations in hopes that you'll feel better afterwards.

'j's one and only has notifications silenced. notify anyway?'

jisung's concern grows when he reads over the little notice at the bottom of your text conversation.

of course, he noticed you had been off the past couple of days, and when he asked what was up, you played it off as nothing, but it's jisung; he knows you like the back of his hand.

he didn't believe for one second that nothing was up. it was clear there was something, but he assumed you weren't in a place to talk to him about it yet, that you weren't ready yet. but now, you weren't even replying, let alone reading his messages.

jisung: good morning love, how did you sleep?

j's one and only: good morning i slept okay, how about you

jisung: i dreamt of you so i slept better than usual ;) i've got another busy day today, so i hope you have an amazing day my love

jisung: [photo attachment] i ate a bento box for lunch today

jisung: [audio file] exclusive sneak peek of a b-side [audio file] exclusive sneak peek of a skz-record

jisung: baby

jisung: y/n baby

he stares down at his phone, hoping to get a read receipt from you, but nothing. jisung finds himself swiping down the notification screen and swiping it away multiple times. on–probably–the fifth rotation, he pauses, an imaginary lightbulb flashing over his head.

jisung: i'm coming over

…

your sob session only further tired you out. you didn't have it in you to fight to stay awake, letting your heavy eyelids close as you cried to sleep around dinner time, curling up into a smaller ball as your tears soaked the comforter.

your eyes are puffy, your nose is runny and almost matches the flushed, red tint of your cheeks, your hair is dishevelled, and you have a prominent pout on your lips even in your sleep. the tears that fell from your eyes and stained your cheeks also bound your eyelashes together, as they glisten under the light of your bedside lamp.

a couple hours later, you're stirring awake, your head rolling left and right, and a tired groan leaves your lips. with a hum, you blink slowly as you come to full consciousness, and your brain is also slowly waking up from its resting state. after a brief stretch and a rush of endorphins flowing through your body, allowing you to relax, your limbs fall back into the mattress with a soft thump.

with a sigh, you roll your head to the side to look at the clock on the wall, registering that you've slept for a little over two hours and that there are a couple of hours left until midnight. you aren't starving, but you do feel like you need something to fill you up, so you roll out of bed and make your way into the kitchen to grab a light snack and a glass of water, snatching your phone off the bedside table before making your way out.

the moment your screen comes to life, you find a couple of missed messages from Jisung that you go to check first and send replies to.

j.one<3: [audio file] exclusive sneak peek of a b-side [audio file] exclusive sneak peek of a skz-record

j.one<3: baby

j.one<3: y/n baby

j.one<3: i'm coming over

you: :O i'm telling jyp also i just woke up from a nap so jibaby you should stay home and rest, i'm fine

"you're not fine."

you stop in your tracks while feeling like your heart has jumped out of your chest. a sharp gasp leaves you as your hand grips your shirt in utter shock.

walking out from the kitchen and standing across from you, the dark-haired boy's eyes are laced with worry and concern, and his lips pout the slightest bit as he looks at you.

"shit ji, you scared the shit out of me," you watch as he shuts his screen off, "what are you doing here?"

"it's friday," he pushes himself off the wall, "remember our little deal?"

you nod, mouth agape with realization. your little deal was that if jisung would come over on fridays when his weekend schedules were nonexistent or started later in the day, one of the reasons why he had a key to yours and yunjin's place.

jisung takes a few steps towards you, just enough to take your chin between his thumb and forefinger, moving your head around as his eyes graze your face. meanwhile, you look up at him with doe-eyed eyes, confused. he lets go of your chin and moves to take your hand, pulling you behind him as he walks into the living area.

"sit," he nods towards the couch. you follow his words and take a seat. stay there. i'll be right back. i made you some food."

you mutter a small agreement as your boyfriend walks out of view. a couple moments later, he walks out from behind the couch with a bowl in one hand and a cup in his other, placing both dishes down on the coffee table before he sits beside you.

"ji–"

"eat," he's quick to cut you off, but he's also quick to notice how sharp his tone is. not wanting to come off wrong, he quickly adds, " please."

you stare at him, to which he flashes you a quick smile. you're still quite perplexed, but you listen to him anyway; plus, whatever he's whipped up looks quite good, and you can't resist.

your boyfriend watches you eat for a few minutes before reaching for the glass of water on the table. the water is ready and on standby for when you need it. with a small smile, you exchange your food for the water he's holding, taking gulps while he places the bowl back on the table, followed by the water.

"tell me, what's wrong?" jisung has an elbow propped up on the couch, his hand coming down to pat the side of your head and play with a couple of strands of your hair. your hair is quite tangled after waking up from a nap.

"nothings wrong," you deny.

he purses his lips together before continuing, "you've been quiet over text all day," he tips his chin, nodding towards your face, "the red, puffy eyes and tear stains don't exactly back up your statement."

your appearance only further proved to the round-chinned boy that something was definitely going on. along with the ones he previously mentioned, your cheeks and nose were flushed with a tint of red, and your lashes were clumped together, a remnant of the tears you shed that tired you to sleep.

"i-it's stupid," you mutter, your eyes wandering away from jisung in shame.

jisung bites his tongue, taking a step back to observe you fully and your body language. he tries to put himself in your perspective before he says something. your boyfriend also doesn't want to come on too strong, as you're already going through something. he needs to use his 't' to his advantage while also keeping in mind your 'f, ' which is simultaneously logical but sensitive to your feelings.

"hey, look at me. whatever it is, it's not stupid," his hand travels down slowly, gently cupping your cheek. your bottom lip is tucked between your teeth as you meet his gaze. " if you want, you can tell me what's going on, and i'll listen. if you don't want to, then i'll still be here, however you need me to be here right now."

jisung's thumb caresses your cheek gently, paired with a smile as gentle as his touch. you lean into his palm, the word 'hug' leaving your lips with a breathless sigh, to which jisung adjusts both your positions immediately.

the hug becomes a cuddle as you both lie on the couch facing each other, your face buried in jisung's chest, and one arm is squished between you two and the other around his torso. on the other hand, Jisung has an arm under your neck, and the other is holding you close, the smell of your shampoo gracing his senses from how close you are.

your body relaxes but your heart still feels heavy, although it's an improvement compared to a couple hours ago.

jisung's fingers toy with the strands of your hair, occasionally brushing through and trying to gently undo the knots. his mind wandering.

of course, you and jisung aren't attached by the hip and texting all day, every day; there have been times when a couple of hours linger between replies. either you or he would send a message beforehand letting the other know that there would be a delay on your end.

jisung knows you like the back of his hand. he knows your habits and mannerisms. so when you weren't replying or reading his messages after the exchange in the morning, coupled with your demeanour over text and a couple of phone calls, he knew something was wrong.

he knows how you get when you're in the wrong place mentally and emotionally, how you tend to shut yourself in and away from people. saying you want to be alone when you really don't.

before he left the company building, he made sure to check in with chan and the group manager regarding the weekend schedule–wanting to spend as much time as possible with you. sure, this meant he moved some things around, and his sunday would be more packed than usual, but jisung wanted and needed to be there for you.

and you didn't need to know that detail.

when jisung unlocked the front door, he did it as quietly as possible. he looked around the living area and kitchen to see if there were any signs of you, but the kitchen was clean, minus a used glass cup on the counter. he then made his way down the hall and to your bedroom, cracking open the door slowly, trying to avoid it creaking just in case you had been asleep, and you had.

jisung slowly approached the side of the bed, knelt, and observed your sleeping state.

your room was dim, and the only light source was the lamp on your bedside table, thus a yellow hue illuminating your features. jisung felt his heart ache at the sight of you. the air of tranquillity from your sleeping state contrasted with the clear signs of distress that lulled you to sleep. your cheeks were still quite damp with tears, and there were a couple of wet spots on your comforter and pillow.

the sight of you asleep with tear-stained cheeks had jisung wondering what had been going on inside your head the past couple of days, wanting to know the gravity of the storm inside your mind that eventually blew over and resulted in you, isolating yourself, alone and crying yourself to sleep. jisung wanted to get a glimpse into that mind of yours, fight off the thoughts and feelings that brought you to such a low point.

at the same time, the longer he looked at you, jisung wondered if he had done something. he wondered if he had done something lately that caused you to shy away from coming to him, that caused you to resort to crying alone in your room as the easier option. but jisung needed to fight those thoughts to the back of his mind, snapping himself to the realization that this isn't about him but about you and how you feel.

jisung didn't want to wake you up too soon, so he got back up, closed the door behind him softly, and made his way to your kitchen again. he opened and closed the cupboards, fridge, and freezer to identify ingredients he could whip up for you, just in time for you to eat once you awoke.

building up the confidence to speak, your fingers toy with the fabric on the back of jisung's hoodie. you take deep breathes and open your mouth.

"it's the feeling of self-doubt again…" you say softly, almost as if you're in a public place and spilling a secret—quiet but just loud enough for jisung to hear. he hums in acknowledgment, "i just... i don't know."

"how do you need me right now?"

you take a second to think, contemplating what would help you the most now.

"here with me, like this," you move your head up to look at him, "i just need someone to listen."

jisung nods, adjusting his position, but his hold on you never falters; he keeps you close. when he's adjusted, he nods again, this time with a smile and a look of determination.

when jisung felt your body relax in his arms earlier, he wished he could have been there sooner. he wished that you could have sobbed in his arms instead, and he would've held you tight instead of you crying into your pillow and comforter, alone in the dark. what matters to him now is that he's here, and he'll be here however you need him.

"i'm all ears for you, baby."

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thehusbandoden · 2 years ago

Text

Lonesome Nights -Soft!Dabi x Reader

I'm still very new to this, so please bear with me! Umm this is an old drabble of mine, so I can't guarantee the quality. Enjoy!

Kinda angsty in the beginning.. more like a comfort fic than anything.

(I have zero idea if I did Dabi right at all.)

You love your secret husband. You completely, and utterly do. And that's probably why you're hurting so much right now.

When you insisted your relationship couldn't progress into anything intimate until marriage Dabi grudgingly agreed after a few weeks of arguments. You both loved each other deeply, and after five years of secretly dating you both wanted something more. But, you wanted marriage, and Dabi didn't want to put you in anymore danger. Finally, after five weeks of arguing, hurt feelings, and lonely nights Dabi agreed to the marriage. And so you both eloped after a month of recovering. And now here you were, seven months later.

Lonely and depressed while crying to a picture of your cold husband. You know he loves you, you do. But that doesn't sooth your aching heart when he ignores your texts and calls for weeks on end. You knew he wasn't cheating, Dabi was too broken, loyal, and outspoken to hurt the one person who truly wanted and loved him.

He had villain work to do, and to protect you he would leave one night and not come back for weeks, not even notifying you on occasion. Since after your marriage this has been the longest he's been gone, and be didn't even tell you this time. It hurt, you'd gotten so used to having your husband with you it physically hurt to have him away. You needed him, his warmth, his gentle touch, his raspy yet gentle voice, his sweet kisses, honestly, you missed every little thing about him.

You tried to contact him, but he always turned off his phone on missions. For both of your safety. He couldn't get distracted, and the league couldn't know about you. No one could. You sobbed as you stroked your phone, a picture of one of Dabi's rare smiles. "I miss you so much... Just come home my Love.". You cried, snuggling closer to the body pillow you found in your closet a few months after dating.

Dabi never mentioned anything but it was obvious he got it for you. It did have a large print of him on both sides after all. When Dabi leaves or you get in a fight you'll spray Dabi's cologne onto it and snuggle into it, it was your comfort. You laid there for hours, finally falling asleep around midnight, your tears staining your face.

Dabi walked into his apartment, successfuly hiding his excitement to finally be home. He's been gone for five weeks, and he couldn't wait to slip into the arms of his lovely (Y/n). He's missed his love so much. He's gotten used to your loving words, endless warmth, sweet smell, soothing voice, and endless love. You're perfect, and no matter how hard it was, he's so, so happy he married you. And eventually, when that man's dealt with.. maybe he could settle down for you.. just maybe.

After softly closing the door Dabi took off his coat and boots, throwing them on the floor per usual. He didn't really want to deal with the pain of putting them away after a long mission, and it made you happy to see them on the floor. It helped assure you that he was home and safe. Dabi strolled towards your shared bedroom before softly opening the door. Strolling towards your side of the bed, he smiled as he saw you cuddled into his pillows instead of your own. Smiling wider he studied your sleeping form clinging to the body pillow of himself.

As he got to his side of the bed he crouched down to study your face. Moving a strand of your hair behind your ear he stooped down to kiss your forehead, and then he saw it. The red tear stains that littered your cheeks.

Now, even though Dabi could be a bit.. oblivious, doesn't mean he didn't know that you've been crying. Boiling anger shook Dabi, he knew you better than he knew himself. Unless you were extremely hormonal -which happens rarely- you didn't cry for something silly. So something horrible must have happened to you! Were you being bullied again? If so they would die tonight.

Quietly cursing, Dabi pulled out his personal phone and turned it on for the first time in five weeks. Unlocking it, he pulled up your texts. Whenever you were struggling and he wasn't there to talk in person you would text him. And Dabi was right. In all there were 163 text messages and 42 missed calls.

Guilt filled Dabi as he read text after text. You had missed him. That must have been why you were crying! Stepping out into the living room Dabi listened to every voice mail you left him, saving all of them. After calming himself down -and convincing himself that burning into his already burnt skin would just hurt you more- Dabi walked back into your bedroom. Climbing into bed behind you, Dabi snuggled as close to you as possible, praying that you would let go of that darned body pillow and hold him instead.

Blinking your eyes open you frowned. Remembering your dismay last night, it was understandable you would have a dream of Dabi coming home. Sighing, you shifted your position, digging your face into Dabi's pillows for comfort. You usually spray Dabi's cologne onto them before bed so you would have a faint hint of his smell. But, it's been hours.. so why is the smell so fresh? Shaking your head you convinced yourself to get up.

Walking out to the hallway you stopped at the darkness. You always kept the blinds open when Dabi wasn't home so you could enjoy the sunlight.

Since Dabi was a wanted criminal, he always kept the blinds closed. Walking into the living room you baffled at the familiar unlocked door and Dabi's discarded boots and jacket. That must mean...

"Good morning Mouse." a familiar voice whispered in your ear as strong, warm arms encircled your waist. "D-Dabi?" you ask, voice cracking with emotion.

"Baby.. have you really missed me that much?" Dabi asked, his voice thick with guilt. "It's just... I've gotten so used to you being with me all day.. and I didn't even have time to prepare.." you whisper, tears glistening your already red eyes.

"(Y/n)... Baby. You know that I have to work." "I- I know... But could I maybe get a warning next time? It hurts to wake up to you gone.."

Dabi smiled painfully, his eyes full of distress. "Okay. I will. I'm so sorry Dollface..." Dabi turned you around so you were facing him, pressing you impossibly closer.

"I love you.." you whisper, kissing Dabi's jaw. "And I you." Dabi whispered back, pressing a returning kiss on your head, lingering for a while.

Masterlist

Do not copy, repost, nor plagiarize my work. Ask before you translate or use my work in any way, minus reblogging.

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xlatiwritesx · 2 years ago

Text

The Only Real Thing | EH9

A/N: Finally !! A football Imagine !! The amount of players I imagined this for before settling for Erling 💀. Anyways, Enjoy 🥳

Genre: fluff, then heart-wrenching angst. Erling Haaland x Singer!FemReader.

Words: 4.7K

Synopsis: after your tour’s last show at the Etihad, your Manchester songwriting sessions start for the next six months. However, a newly found love between you and a Norwegian player gets harder to navigate the closer your time to go back to your life in the US gets.

⭐️⭐️⭐️

You look out the plane's window, trying to count the clouds filling up the night sky to get your mind off counting the cracks in your heart or the tears that won't stop falling.

Why won't anything last? Why can't anything perfect just exist? But then you wouldn't have had the six months worth a life time with him anyway.

It wasn't perfect. But you still loved every living minute of it. You loved his imperfect guitar skills, his imperfect dancing, his imperfect cooking. All his imperfects were perfect to you.

You wished that your team never handed out tickets to the ManCity players for your Etihad Stadium concert. You wished you hadn't met him. That meant you won't ever have all the memories from your short time together, and you were okay with that. You can live without this heart ache. You can definitely live without Erling's sobs and red face engraved in your head.

You try to pin point exactly when you lost yourself to him. Your songwriting sessions in Manchester were supposed to come and go quietly after your tour's last show at the Etihad.

You weren't supposed to run into a Norwegian player from a sky blue team two days later. He wasn't supposed to complement your music. You weren't supposed to blush as you thanked him. And he absolutely shouldn't have asked you out for lunch.

But you still ran into that Norwegian player, and you still agreed for lunch. You sat in the cool Manchester air outside a quiet restaurant and just talked about anything that came to mind.

You talked about music and he talked about football. You hoped he didn't notice how much you were enjoying talking with him over pizza and coke. It was embarrassingly a lot. But you didn't know that he felt exactly the same way.

He never wanted it to end.

He didn't want all his planning to purposely run into you outside the studio you worked at to end in just an hour.

So he was obviously unhappy when Pep called his number, asking where he was.

"Training?" You smiled, ignoring the disappointment that he had to go and that you'll probably never see him again. At least not in person.

"Yeah. Maybe I could show you around tomorrow since it's my day off. I've been in Manchester long enough to finally say this to someone" he proudly opens his arms and you laugh lightly, keeping your excitement as low as possible for it not to show.

And he did show you Manchester the next day. He took you downtown, to the park he always goes to when he wants to just relax after a busy week of games and training, to where all the tourists go when they usually visit, and where he and his teammates usually hang out around the Etihad.

"I never knew there's this much to do in Manchester" you smile at him and he shakes his head.

"Me neither. It's a beautiful 'City'" he does air quotes and laughs. You roll your eyes at his joke, laughing along with him.

He drops you off at your rented house and waits until you get inside. You fight the urge to look back and wave one last time at your newly found crush. You felt so stupid for admitting it, but for the next few weeks, you waited for him to text you, you danced around your room when he finally did, you hoped and dreamt of when he would ask you to hang out again, you looked for tickets to his games, thought about how his cheeks redden under the sun, how focused he gets when driving, and how excited he gets when he talks about football.

A few weeks of texting lead to something more. You start writing songs about how he made you feel. About your little interactions. About him.

Going downtown turned into going to his house. Just a few hours turned into all day. Hearing about training and games turned into watching them live at the Etihad.

"That was a great game!" You try to convince him as you walked out of the stadium after a disappointing game. He still sulks as you walk to his car.

"We could've won with a bigger difference" he whines and you shake your head, leaning back on his car door when you reached it. He stands in front of you.

"You still won, though. Give yourself and the team some credit" you tell him. He doesn't reply.

He looks up and you admire how the setting sun washes his face golden. He looks at you, not holding back any emotion from flooding his eyes and drowning you in admiration. You don't either. You don't hold back from staring into his eyes for as long as he would let you.

"I've been..." he walks closer to you, hesitantly taking your hands in his own. Your heart feels like it could stop any second. You almost urge him to just say it. To finally make your dreams come to life.

"You're all I think about" he laughs nervously. You don't. You're too flustered to do or say anything.

"And I just can't wait any longer to ask you to be mine. I want you for myself. I want you to be wearing my jersey when I look at the crowd and look for you" he says so quietly it's almost a whisper. You wanted to kiss him. Right then and there. So when he leaned in, you placed a hand on his cheek and he took that as an invitation to lean in further.

You've never felt anything like you did in that moment. Nothing even came close. Everything felt meaningless compared to it. You wanted him more than you've ever wanted anything. You wanted that kiss to last a life time, but nothing does unfortunately.

Once Erling pulled away, you looked down at your feet and pursed your lips together as he looked around. Nervous and flustered, you turn around and open the car door, getting in quickly and leaving Erling outside.

He looks at you through the window and chuckles. However, you don't see him jump up and down, raising two thumbs ups to Jack, John, and Ruben who just witnessed everything that happened between the two of you. They smiled proudly at Erling who never stopped talking about you to them. How he was going to ask you to be finally his. So, they had a mini party right there that he finally got you.

Things in the studio were fired up. With your raging emotions, so much was getting done and work has never been easier. You and Erling hung out every day at that point. He would sometimes come hang out at the studio, and you'd leave together to spend the night at his place.

He would cook you too salty, or too bland meals every time you went to his place. His movie choices were peculiar, yet enjoyable. His arms were slowly becoming home to you, and his clothes were becoming your daily attire.

You attended every game. You did wear his jersey to every single one of them, and though the Etihad was always full of thousands of people, Erling always looked up to only you to celebrate his goals.

It was a Tuesday night at his place. Half eaten, too salty pasta sat in ceramic plates on the coffee table and a soap opera on Erling's TV. You laid on top of Erling on his living room's couch, resting your head of his chest while silently counting his calm heart beats and enjoying the warmth from his wrapped arm around your body.

"Y/n" Erling calls quietly.

"Hm?" You hum in response, your eyes focused on the TV.

He suddenly detangles himself from you and towers above you as he stands next to the couch. You look up at him before he carries you. You giggle, unconsciously wrapping your arms around his neck and brining your face close to his.

Your foreheads touch and you both stay quiet for a second. You wait for Erling to speak.

"I'm in love with you, y/n y/l/n" he whispers and your heart explodes with an emotion you could only explain as love. You thought of all the explanations of love you came across throughout your life. You compared them to what you felt in that moment, but to no avail. Nothing came close to that feeling. That feeling could never be articulated. Could never be conveyed through mere speech or writing.

"I'm in love with you, Erling Haaland" you whisper back before kissing him, hoping to convey how real your feelings were for him. How deep you felt how you felt towards him.

As your fourth month in Manchester wraps up, you realize how far you and Erling have come. And how close your time to go back to the States was coming too.

But you kept your eyes shut and your ears plugged. You convinced yourself that by doing so, that day would just never come around.

You two still held hands every chance you got, you still slow danced around Erling's living room, you still went to every game, Erling still celebrated his goals and wins with only you. You kept writing songs about him and he kept dedicating all his hard work to you.

"Come on close your eyes" Erling urged and you placed both hands on your eyes. You were sat on his bed, ready to go to sleep when he announced that he got you something. He dangled a necklace right in front of your face.

"Open them" he orders quietly. You do so and gasp at the dangling jewelry in front of you.

Erling admires your reaction as you take the necklace in your hand. You inspect the golden letters written in his cursive handwriting. It was both of your initials.

"This way you'll always have a piece of me with you when I'm away" he says quietly and you look at him. You quickly hug him tightly, trying to bury the heart ache that only keeps getting more tangible.

The more time that passes, the harder it gets to hide the fact that this whole whirlwind romance won't last. You knew that. Erling knew that too. But, understandably, none of you wanted to admit it. So you swallowed the lump in your throat and forced your tears back into their ducts and he held you tighter than usual.

"I love you" you mumbled into his neck and he kissed your temple, still holding you.

"I love you" he said it back to you like he always did and forever will.

You finally meet his family. You get to know his younger sisters and help his mother in the kitchen. You try to test your football trivia with his dad and you actually impress him with how much you picked up since you got together with Erling.

Under the dinner table, your hands intertwine and your heart flutters at the way his parents smile at you every time Erling talks about you.

At the Etihad, things are also getting fired up because of Erling's raging emotions. He runs faster, laughs louder, and scores better. Pep, Jack, and John stand next to each other, admiring his genuine laughter at something Kyle said.

"Funny what love does to you" John says quietly, still smiling at Erling. Jack nodded, his eyes focused on Erling as well.

Only Pep was worried. He knew once the slightest crack occurs in Erlings dream relationship, and not because his performance will plummet, but because he knew how hard heartbreak could be. And he knew damn well that he'll just stand and watch, because nothing ever mends a broken heart.

Towards the end of your sixth month in Manchester, a coherent draft of your upcoming studio album finally came together. You couldn't wait to go home and tell Erling all about it and even listen to it with him.

It was all about falling in love with him after all.

But the plane tickets your manager handed you blew everything away. It was a slap across your face. A wake up call to finally leave the waking dream you've been so immersed in.

"Couldn't find any sooner flights, unfortunately. You've got a lot to catch up to once we get back to the States. Some stations asked if they could..." you couldn't hear anything anymore.

How could you be so stupid? It was only then that you realized how far you've let go of yourself.

You knew you were leaving. At some point. But it still definitely snuck up on you. You've been so in love that you forgot the cruelty of your world. You've been in a shared dream that you've completely forgotten about your own.

You didn't know how you ended up at Erling's place, but you did. You walked in, your feet leading you to where he usually was in the living room. It was familiar. Too familiar.

You didn't say a single word. You just laid on the couch, your head on his thigh. He didn't say anything either.

You stayed like that for what seemed like hours, but just a minute later, Erling spoke.

"What's wrong?" His voice was so quiet he was almost whispering. You unravelled. Completely came undone.

You got up, buried your head in chest and just sobbed. You didn't see an end to it. Not in the near future at least. Startled, Erling tries to look at your face, placing both his hands on your wet cheeks.

"Hey, look at me" he whispers. You try to hold it in to try and have a conversation about it.

But what were you going to say? That you couldn't stay? That you were leaving him after the six months worth a lifetime and more? That you weren't taking his sisters to the park next Sunday? Not going to his game next Monday either? That you were returning his clothes that were practically yours? That you were never waking up next to him again? Not partying with his teammates after every win? That you'll move on and find someone else eventually, but never a love like you've had with him?

You could never.

It takes insane self control to take a steady breath to speak one single coherent sentence. You looked at your hands as his eyes studied your puffy face.

"My plane leaves on Wednesday. To LA" you risk a look at his face and it's as if his life crumbled. In a split second, Erling is up on his feet and chuckling. You start crying again, covering your face with your hands.

"That's all?" He laughs. You look up at him and stand up to walk to him.

"You're crying because you're leaving for a few-"

"No! Not a few days, Erling! I'm going back to the US because my whole life is there! Your whole life?! Here!" You scream at him, tears streaming down your face. You let out a few sobs.

"So? We'll make it work" he shrugs and you roll your eyes at his state of denial. You knew. He knew, too.

You won't work. Ever. Not when your lives were across the world from one another.

"Yeah and how is that?" You impatiently cross your arms and wipe your nose with the sleeve of your sweater.

He looks at you for a long moment in a way that cut your heart a million times. Your lips shake and you turn away from him.

You feel his arms around you from behind almost immediately. He keeps you on your feet. You feel him kiss your temple gently, as if reassuring you that it'll be alright.

But it will not. It will never be.

"We'll find a way. We will" even he sounds unsure now and it breaks you. It really shatters your wellbeing.

You let yourself cry as Erling just held you in his safe arms. You try to gather yourself, but you fail for the next ten minutes. Once you succeed, you guide Erling to sit next to you on the couch.

"Erling" you call his name even though he was right next to you. You take his hand and hold it with both of your own.

"Once I leave Manchester" you start. You couldn't control the blurriness in your eyes any longer, so you just let a tear roll down your cheek.

"I'm never coming back" you look up at him. You wished you hadn't, because his face fell once the words left your mouth. You could tell it was the first time it really hit him.

It really hit him hard. In just two days from now, you'll only be another pretty celebrity in someone else's phone. Running from interview to interview, meeting guys way better than him. Guys who could actually play guitar and know how songwriting works. Guys who can actually be there. Guys that were not tied by a football career across the globe from you.

"Erling, I can't come see you in breaks because I never have any other than one or two days. You deserve someone who can actually be here for you-"

He cuts you off by pulling you into his chest, holding you so tight that it was becoming harder to breath. You just stopped talking. Not bearing to break him or yourself any further.

"You're the only one I want. Even if you leave, that will never ever change. Don't tell me I deserve someone better. Don't tell me that I will find someone who could make my heart beat the way you make it do" he begs and you bury your face in the crook of his neck. You didn't sob. You were way too tired. You just let the tears silently find their way down your face.

Erling was wrong. You'll never find a guy better then he is. You loved teaching him how to play the guitar every time he visited the studio, and he didn't know much about songwriting, but he was the inspiration behind your entire upcoming album.

None of you could say it. None of you could come to terms with it and actually face it. You just held each other as if it was your last day on earth.

Waking up the next day next to Erling didn't feel the same. It didn't make your heart race from excitement and happiness. He didn't kiss your face until you yelled at him to stop, your laughter filling his house.

The rest of the day was spent like normal, though. You were skeptical at first when Erling woke up and was acting like nothing had happened the night before. He didn't seem sad. Or like this was technically your last day together. But as the day went on, you appreciated having one last day with him instead of just crying all day.

You went out for a walk at the park Erling took you to when you first met. Laughed at a cat fight over a bird. Sat under a big tree and held hands while taking in the view around you. Went with Erling to his training session afterwards and cheered him on like you always did. After training, you just went home and Erling immediately got to cooking after a quick shower. You watched his every move from where you sat on the kitchen island.

After dinner, you spent the rest of the night just acting blind to the fact that once you left, you were never coming back to him. Holding hands, listening to his heart beat, rewatching your favorite movie, talking about random topics and sharing your opinions on them.

But time never stopped for anyone. Or anything for that matter. It was so cruel that it kept going until one in the morning. Until you had to leave. And it still kept going as you detangled yourself from Erling.

Suddenly, the atmosphere got heavy. Your feet felt like they couldn't walk you out of his door. Your heart didn't seem to take it.

Erling places his head in his hands, resting his elbows on his knees. He really tried to not cry when it was time, but it was just too much. It was a lot to handle his first ever true love to end just like this.

"Erling" you call him shakily, but he's sobbing at this point. You sat back down next to him, not knowing what to do. He stops himself from crying all of a sudden and gets up. You follow.

"I'll drive you back" he says quietly. You don't object. You follow him to his car.

The drive to your place was awfully quiet. It was too quiet. Every few minutes, you tried stealing a look at him. Checking if he was okay. But you were just kidding yourself. How could he be okay? How could you?

He steps out of his car once he parks in your house's driveway. You do so too. You walk around the car to meet him by the driver's door.

You take his hands and he holds yours. You look up at him and muster a smile. One tugs at his lips too. It was sad, what you were going through. But beautiful. It was all so beautiful nothing will ever compare to it.

He leans in and kisses you. So passionately you almost scream in agony at the thought of it being the last time. You wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him back, hoping to make him feel an ounce of how he made you feel.

You don't pull away from each other for what seemed like an eternity. But when you do, you knew it was a piece of yourself that you've lost and will never be able to restore.

"I love you, y/n" Erling whispers.

"I love you, Erling" you whisper back.

With that, you turn away and walk quickly to your door, as if to outrun the pain. But you knew better than that.

Once your front door shuts, Erling quickly gets into his car, coming completely undone. He cries his heart out, hitting the steering wheel and cursing his mind for playing a reel of the best six months of his life.

You do too. You curse yourself for loving him. You curse yourself for knowing what it's like to be held by him. What it's like to kiss him. Feel him. Hear him talk or watch him cook. Your heart hurts. Your chest hurts too. Your eyes won't stop flooding with tears. You hold the necklace he gave you a few months ago as if you were holding on to him.

Somehow, the next day came a long. Your assistant and manager helped pack the car with you. They doesn't ask about your puffy eyes or sick demeanor. They naturally connected the dots. They knew about you and Erling. Everyone did.

You let yourself silently cry in the backseat on the way to the airport, hoping your manager and assistant don't hear or notice.

After checking in and on your way to security, you hear someone call your name. You turn around to see Jack, John, and Ruben. You smile at them. Genuinely.

"Hey" you greet them, giving them each a quick hug. You ignore the heart ache from not seeing Erling with them.

You two said goodbye last night anyway.

"We couldn't let you leave without saying goodbye in person" John tells you and you smile at them.

"It was fun knowing you guys. Thank you for everything. I never thought I'd make any friends in my time here honestly" you admit.

"Don't let your newly found Brit side die once you get back to America" Jack warns and everyone laughs. Including yourself.

You shake your head and wave at them. They all smile and wave back to you as you start walking backwards.

"I'll stay in touch and watch your games still!" You assure them before turning away to follow your manager and assistant.

And that's how you ended up in a plane, looking out at the clouds, crying as your mind raced with a million thoughts. a million what ifs and would'ves. You thought you won't live long after that heartbreak. You couldn't keep going like this.

But you didn't. As your manager told you, your schedule was full once you got back. You woke up every morning, got your makeup and hair done before running out the door for your scheduled interviews, album shoots, recordings, and many other things you had to do before your album came out.

You still cried yourself to sleep for weeks, though. But it slowly got better. You focused on your work. Your friends. Yourself. You tried your best to not give up. He wouldn't have wanted that for you. Ever.

When your album finally dropped, it was your best one yet. It broke records you never thought you'd break and so many people were enjoying it all across the world. The week your album dropped was a dream turned into reality after two years of constant hard work.

As part of your promotions, you sat in one of the many interviewee chairs you had sat in before. You got comfortable as the interviewer asked you all sorts of questions and you answered them like you always did, wittily yet sufficiently, making the tiny crowd laugh in their seats as they watched.

"About your new album" the interviewer starts and the whole room cheers. You cheer too.

"It seems to be following some sort of plot line, as if telling a story in a way" he continues and you nod along, confirming his theory.

"What's it really about?" The interviewer asks hopefully. You already decided how much you were going to tell the public, so the question didn't surprise you at all.

"About a year ago, I was writing this album in Manchester, UK, and I met this guy while I was there" you start and the room erupts with cheers again. You smile at them before going on.

"We fell for each other a bit too hard" you laugh lightly and the interviewer nods, laughing along.

"But I had to come back to the States and he had to stay in the UK, so" you sigh towards the end.

It was moments like these when you allowed yourself to think about him. About everything that happened last year. You never allowed yourself past just a thought crossing your mind.

But when you actually talked about it, you allowed yourself more than just that. You allowed yourself to remember the little details. To miss him and wonder how he was doing. You've met some guys since then, but Erling had already set the bar impossibly high for any of them to even see.

In Manchester, Erling was still being the star player he is. Since you've left, he had won his first Premier League with ManCity. He still thought about you before, during, and after each game. He kept up with all your news. Watching you shine from afar when you were once in between his arms. He wished you knew how proud he was of you. Of how well your album was doing. That everywhere he went in Manchester, it was being played somewhere.

That night, he watched your interview in bed, his phone resting on the pillow where your head used to rest. He watches you talk about your album and he thinks of how he would've celebrated its success with you. But all he did was smile at his phone screen when you did and hoped you were doing okay off of it too. He prayed every night and everyday that fate will eventually bring you two back together somehow. Still the same, but under different and better circumstances. You prayed for that too.

But until then, all you had was the memories you had together, replaying in your heads and reminding you of the only time you truly felt alive.

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deathofacupid · 11 months ago

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i love you peter b. parker | peter parker

pure angst. that's it lololol

summary: you knew you wouldn't be around forever, and you wanted to leave a piece of you behind for him.

i had this idea in mind for some time but i'm only now just writing it but fr i legit almost cried writing this

we love delulu peter

tw: sad peter

angst (for me) isn't easy to write, but i tried my best here. did you like it???

he knew you were sick, he knew you would leave. but it never really hit him that you would be gone someday, that is, until you were gone. terminal kidney disease wasn't fun, and it most definitely wasn't easy. it didn't matter though, because as long as you had peter by your side, you were sure that nothing would go wrong. that you'd be able to fight through it, because the love of your life was fighting alongside you.

peter was always used to saving everyone, so he felt so utterly useless when he found out. he tried to make you as happy as possible, and to help you do everything that you wanted to do most, and make the most of the time you had left.

he remembered the day he asked you out, and you warned him about the sickness, that you wouldn't be here forever, and that one day, he would have to leave you. no, that you would have to leave him.

but peter being peter hadn't thought that far into the future. he was only 16. he didn't know that he'd grow so attached to you, that you become the one for him.

no. that thought had never occurred.

you had passed in your sleep, at least, age 19. it pained him so much to think about everything you had in store for you.

everything we had.

a life, a future, just waiting.

for all he knew, you were his life. you were his future. so how would he go on? how would he do anything without you? especially when you were his everything?

peter stood next to his aunt, clad in all black, watching your mother scream and cry into your father's shoulder, repeatedly begging for you to come back. he watched her lean down next to the coffin and kiss your hair, whispering sweet nothings. the boy wasn't sure if he'd be able to look at you, to say his goodbyes. because it didn't feel real to him. you couldn't be gone. how could you be gone?

"go, peter," aunt may whispered. "you'll regret it if you don't," her voice was fragile, and he could her the pain in her voice.

"no, no, no, i-i can't-"

"you'll regret it if you don't," she repeated.

so with shaky hands and a heavy heart, he walked over to the black box. there you laid, and he tried to convince himself that you were sleeping.

just sleeping.

he got down on his knees and and looked at you. your hair was perfectly laid out, nails freshly painted. the smallest bit of makeup was on you, but you were a deathly pale. your eyes were closed, but he'd give anything to see those gorgeous hues again, lit up by the liveliness behind them.

"hi, angel," he whispered softly, a strangled sob rising up his throat. "your mom is crying. you should wake up now. didn't we talk about getting more sleep at night? so you wouldn't fall asleep all the time during the day?"

peter chuckled quietly. "baby, i remember that time you fell asleep in mr. nester's class. and you snored? it was so cute. and funny. but mostly cute. they're soft and quiet, but if you're listening, you can hear it. your snores are adorable, you know that? it's hilarious because you always say you don't, y/n, but you do. always. yeah. you always snore. why- why aren't you right now? y-y/n?" he asked, panic creeping in through his words. "why aren't you?"

"y/n? y/n? angel? b-baby, wake up, wake up, it isn't funny anymore, stop it, j-just wake up now, please. please!" he was shaking you now, making the coffin rattle. "aunt may? s-she won't wake up! may! please, wake her up... she- she isn't..." he went off again, murmuring things to himself, all incoherent. "i love you! i lo-love you, y/n!"

they had to drag him away.

months later, he wasn't any better. he could hear aunt may at night sometimes, talking on the phone.

"it wasn't like this with ben," a pause, "no, dr. winston," another pause, "he talks to himself. stays up all night. talks to himself, dr., and not even in the way you might see a little kid doing... no... y-... he always looks scared," peter stopped paying attention at that point. "yes, thursday is fine. thank you."

no, he thought angrily, he didn't need a doctor. not some psychiatrists or psychologists. he needed you. but when he closed his eyes and saw may's pained face, he thought that he'd give it a try. for her. for you, right?

then, it had been a year. he was doing a little better, but barely. peter ate more. slept more. had less nightmares.

but he still didn't have you.

some nights he would stand on the top of his apartment building, right on the ledge, and debate ending it all. that way, he could be with you. and then he remembered may. and ned. and mj. how they'd already lost you, and how they didn't need more grief. those nights he'd go back into his flat and lock himself in his room, crying the rest of the night.

another year passed, and he stood in front of your house. your parents were finally cleaning out your old room, and they'd asked him to come over and see if there was anything he'd wanted. they let him in, giving hugs and greetings. peter trudged up the stairs and into your room. he closed his eyes and inhaled, remembering your loving scent.

but he didn't cry. he'd already done that. peter had no tears left. he was empty. numb.

as he analyzed the room, he saw many boxes, and noted that the bed was gone. some frames were still up, and many decorations were removed. on the dresser there was a photo of you and peter. your head was thrown up as you laughed, and peter was staring lovingly at you. it was a picture that neither of you knew was taken, but when you saw it, it became your favorite.

he'd told a lame joke, and you'd laughed. no one else laughed at his jokes, which was one of the reasons he fell in love with you. here, you were at the carnival with peter, ned, and mj. it was a blurry, side-angle picture, slightly grainy as the lighting was terrible. ned had taken it, and while it wasn't the greatest quality, you had adored it, repeatedly thanking him.

peter sat down and pulled the nearest box closer to him, taking out the first item he grabbed. a purple... journal? there was "to peter parker, the love of my life" written on the front cover in sharpie.

your handwriting.

your. handwriting.

he carefully flipped to the front page.

never mind. he did have tears left to cry.

entry 1:

okay, yes, i know, this is silly. and i doubt you'll ever have to read this, but if you are, it means i'm not here anymore, or that you're going through my stuff again without my permission. in which case, put this down.

he felt tears cascade down his cheek, and he sniffled softly.

peter b. parker, i love you. i have loved you since the day that you bought me that coke when i was a quarter short. luckily, you loved me, too, and now we're together. i wanted to do this because i know i won't be around forever. and before i die (if i do) i want to give you a piece of me, and this is how i'll do it.

i love you, peter b. parker.

he flipped to the next page.

entry 2:

in a world of endemic sickness, where cruelty is the cause and love the antidote, the patients declare themselves doctors and seal the fate of the world.

i love you, peter b. parker.

so he kept reading.

entry 6:

because your love is so whole, my missing pieces appear. because your touch carries such passion, what was scarred becomes soft once more. because you are steady and patient, my open wounds have time to seal and vanish.

perhaps that is why they say love is such magic, this gift from the universe, this sweet addiction to the man i was born to find. for with my twin soul, the only other born in the same flame as i, we are able to bathe one other in warmth and light as easily as we breathe, immune and oblivious to darkness.

i love you, peter b. parker.

entry 14:

i love you like you're the last of my kind. it is as if you speak the same language as i, yet no other is able. to be around you is like finally not being alone - as if all my life i've been isolated, in a windowless room, in a doorless room...

and then suddenly you walk in as if strolling over a summer meadow. how is that you are so much more than sunshine? how is it you breathe life when no other can? why is it you are my medicine? who could love me more than you? so, my love, know this - while i breathe i am yours in mind, body and soul.

i love you, peter b. parker.

entry 27:

you said that meeting me wasn't like a new song, but like opening a book and finding a language you'd never seen before. i want you know that i feel the same way. your love is something beautiful; meeting you is like meeting an enigma.

i don't know how you exist in this world yet you do. so let me tell you now - i will always love you in mind, body and soul. you are the trap i've been wanting to fall into my whole life; liberty from you would simply be an infinite prison. i am the softness you seek and you are the cradle for my head and heart.

i love you, peter b. parker.

entry 42:

love quotes inspire, golden strands of truth in an age of cynicism. yet for me they can never adequately capture the strands of emotion that tumble through the air whenever my my heart turns to you.

love after all transcends time, distance and even mortality. love is the greatest wonder of our age, weightless and invisible as it is. the wordsmith brings a beauty to the love, elevates it yet sometimes this very pedestal brings us to romantic notions too heady for ordinary life.

i love you like the nascent leaves of spring love warmth; i love you like the ancients loved the night sky; i love you like a cool draught of water on a summers day. love cannot be fireworks for an entire lifetime, though we've had our share. love must flow quietly, peacefully, always remaining strong.

love is nothing like finance, we don't give a certain amount to get something back; we simply give. love doesn't lead us to chide or sulk when we feel the lack of it from our partner. it shows us how to bring life and fire back to their soul, to love them back to their true selves and wellness. so, do i adore quotations of love? i do; but for me love is more... it is the greatest power we can ever know. anything else is a cruel and empty distraction.

i love you, peter b. parker.

he let himself get lost in your words, in your love, paying no attention to anything else.

entry 136:

if any one moment in time anchored my soul, creating a tether to this plane of reality, it was the moment i fell in love with you. i realized that i had a protector born of pure love and how could i not love that? how could i not love all that you are? you are the rope and knot to this vessel now in safe mooring. for that, i will forever be yours. in these words i hope you find your truth.

i love you, peter b. parker.

entry 200:

i love you, peter b. parker.

and that was the last page. he took two things home that day. the photo and the journal.

"i love you, too, angel," he whispered on his way back home, to no one really. maybe to the wind, but either way, he knew you heard it.

#tom holland x reader #spiderman #tom holland #peter parker #angst

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acourtofquestions · 2 months ago

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Kingdom of Ash

Chapter 25-31

Annotations/Quotes/Reactions/ w SPOILERS (up to KoA 31)

Chapter 25

“She drifted down again, into a pocket of the dark, where she told herself that story-the story-over and over.”

—There is power in stories

“Once upon a time, in a land long since burned to ash, there lived a young princess who loved her kingdom.”

“Who she was, what she was, what she stood to destroy should she yield to the near- airlessness of the box, to the rising strain.”

“My name is Celaena Sardothien and I will not be afraid.”

“You do not yield.”

“His Fireheart, shut in the dark.”

“And then the healers would return with their sweet-smelling smoke, as they had come these months, these years, however long it had been.”

—Then the sweet smelling smoke choking her in TAB — The gloriella reference in CoM — And then Kaltain who she might’ve been like same story same aches different endings — Then in ToD when everything’s way happier (never over the that’s my wife differences for Chaorene & Rowaelin😭)

And then the big thing that kills me the fact she doesn’t know how long it’s been anymore

And wtf do the “healers” make of this? (Later addressed lol book aging edits)

“But she'd seen beyond them, for an instant.”

Aelin, babe, get the fuck out & RUN!

ROWAN IS RIGHT THERE — THIS IS KILLING ME — AGH!

How dare they disgrace the “Old Language” with Cairn instead of Rowan’s accented pretty words

“His canvas had been wiped bare, ready for him to paint red.”

I wish the dresser was the ACOTAR one with Feyre’s paintings not Cairns evil dungeon of nauseating misery

“Aelin was ready, too.”

—Babe, please tell me you have a plan or are about to do an Endovier rampage or anything that doesn’t give me a heart attack

“For once, sleeping. Grief laid heavy on him, dulling his coat, dimming his bright eyes.”

—He was so tired too… his bright eyes… oh gosh Maas why do you do this to me😭 he just stayed with her all the time watching so she wasn’t alone in the worst punishment possible

“The way merchant might display his finest jewels.”

“The girl wore her scars the way some women wore their finest jewelry.”

—The times that quote comes up and full circle between Yrene, TAB, & KoA

“Aelin couldn't fight the trembling in her mouth at the night sky, at the pinpricks of light shining in it. Stars. Just two, but there were stars overhead. The sky itself ... it was not the heaviness of full night, but rather a murky, graying black. Dawn. Likely an hour or so away, if the stars remained out. Perhaps she would last long enough to see sunlight.”

Sobbing… her and Rowan are looking at the same stars & sky… there’s 2 stars just 2… ITS THEM — babe hang on he’s right there — HOW DID WE GO FROM A GIRL LOOKING AT THE STARS & at worst haunting dreams & finally escaping Endovier in ToG TO THIS😭🖤

Always dawn… or at least it gets me ever since ToD

“Offering a glimpse of fires and lightening darkness beyond. Nothing else.”

Wasn’t Fenrys forbidden to speak? Is he fighting the oath just to warn her with a single growl?😭

“Perhaps you'll burn like the rest of us.”

—Witch trials much Sarah? You’re triggering me for Yrene now.

Also stupid question: Aelin never gets burned externally from her magic but frequently burns off all her clothes yet her hair minus getting singed once stays fine even then… I guess that’s not a question I’m just separately hypothetically confused.

“No.”

Same as TAB a single word that echoed on. The trigger in it for her.

“This wasn't just a breaking of her body. But a breaking of her—of the fire she'd come to love. To destroy the part of her that sang. — Until she feared the flame, until she hated it, as she hated those healers who had come again and again to repair her body, to hide what was real from what had been a dream.”

—That’s the cruelty they keep using. And to take the thing she fought to get back, to no longer be afraid. The music, she loved the song, the thing Rowan heard all those years. To hate anyone who might help her. To break everything. —Including me while reading this… legit the most fucked up thing I’ve ever read… her fire😭😭😭

“Fenrys's snarl rolled on, endless.”

—Nothing.

It keeps coming down to that word.

I’m afraid of which one of them is Cairn talking to…

“She began fraying then, who she was and had been melting away.”

Why is this happening right now when Rowan is so close?!

“Please.”

The thing she never said😭

“And she wouldn't be able to stop it, stop him.”

“The hand she'd been dealt. It was the hand she had been dealt, and she would endure it.”

“You do not yield.”

“"Wait." The word was a rasp.”

—no. It all broke😭🖤 MAAS UR KILLING ME HERE

What is it with Terrasen and endure that’s always the words for the children of it they endure

“One last chance. She'd seen the stars overhead. It was as great a gift as any she'd received, greater than the jewels and gowns and art she'd once coveted and amassed in Rifthold. The last gift she would receive, if she played the hand she'd been dealt. If she played him right.”

—I miss the Throne of Glass days.—I have no annotations for like pages cause legit just cried & read

“Dawn neared, the stars dimming one by one.”

—ROWAN MY FUCKING GODS ITS NOT THE STARS DIMMING ITS YOUR WIFE — GO NOW

Half a camp between him & her … so close … so far

“How many would he know? How many had he trained?”

—these moments with the cadre hurt cause it reminds how many lives they've had before this

“That if they knew him, they'd be wise and stand down.”

—That if they knew him or what's good for them😅😂

“A killing calm had settled over him hours ago. Days ago. Months ago.”

—the moment she was gone. They both have that tendency. It’s giving tAB Celaena — very interesting the parallels she writes in for soulmates and oath bindings.

“Go, a quiet voice urged. Go now. — Essar's sister had advised to wait until dawn. — Go now. That voice, warm and yet insistent, tugged.”

—whatever annoying god is talking here is being helpful for once (& it better not be to kill Aelin later) but YEAH GO NOW

okay she’ll get to him save him from the battle ensuring & or vice-versa just MOVE PEOPLE/FAE

Is this the first time Rowan describes anything as warm without Aelin?

“Now, Prince.”

— not important side note I get so confused by the times he's called Prince and her Princess but I guess technically there's no coronation so she's not Queen & him King?

“He knew that voice, had felt its warmth. And if the Lady of Light herself whispered at his ear…”

— MALA … boom boom Fire-Bringer (Aelin at her most powerful ;-) cause it’s ✨Dawn✨

“…Rowan didn't give himself time to consider, to rage at the goddess who urged him to act but would gladly sacrifice his mate to the Lock.”

THATS WHAT I SAID I WAS ANNOYED ABOUT

“So Rowan steeled himself, willing ice into his veins. Calm. Precise. Deadly. Every swing of his blades, every blast of his power, had to count. Rowan speared his magic toward the camp entrance. The guards grabbed for their throats, feeble shields wobbling around them. Rowan shattered them with half a thought, his magic tearing the air from their lungs, their blood They went down a heartbeat later. Sentries shouted from the trees, orders of "Sound the alarm!" ringing out. But Rowan was already running. And the sentries in the trees, their shouts lingering on the wind as they gasped for breath, were already dead.”

Also he and Zoya Nazyalensky would get along especially with their magic and trauma😅

“The sky slowly bled toward dawn.”

—This better not be forshadowing symbolism

“It was an effort not to peer behind him, though Lorcan could not see her. They'd left Elide a few miles into the forest, hidden in a copse of trees bordering a glen. Should all go poorly, she'd flee deeper into the hilly woods, up into the ancient mountains. Where far more deadly and cunning predators than Fae still prowled.”

—YEAH WE KNOW WE READ HOF😅I DONT NEED SKINWALKERS COMING OUT RIGHT NOW OKAY?!

“She hadn't offered him a parting word, though she'd wished them all luck. Lorcan hadn't been able to find the right words anyway, so he'd left without so much as a look back. But he glanced back now.”

—NOT A GLANCE BACK — UGH MY SHIPPER SOUL😭

“Prayed that if they didn't return, she wouldn't come hunting for them.”

—“Good hunting, Lady.”

—NOT THE TIME ELIDE — we can't have a never ending circle of everyone trying to catch each other

“Death beckoned nearby.”

—that better be Cairns impending doom or… Rowaelin rampages… because if its Aelin or Fenrys I’m going to lose it — I can't handle more chapters like this, so, help me out Emo Lorcan

Chapter 26

“The portrait of uncertain fear”

—what does that mean? Is it false then? I feel like Maas uses that word portrait with Elide when she's lying…

"When you finish breaking me apart for the day, how does it feel to know that you are still nothing?"

—her voice cracking cause its the first time she's spoken😭 —that's a lil piece of my Aelin Fire-hearted girl. — OH COME ON

“She smiled back through the mask. "You were only given the oath for this. For me. Without me, you're nothing. You'll go back to being nothing. Less than nothing, from what I've heard."”

No, she’s a fire breathing bitch queen — how dare you say that derogatorily *later edit wait if Remelle said that and it got around is it like Aelin & the Rowan rumors that nickname caught on? Or did Aelin start it herself… agh I can’t remember… I need to re-read QoS*

“They forget I’m Fae too.”

—yes you are babe😭 claim it! … but also what’s the plan cause Fenrys & I are nervous … cause if she can’t stop it what’s the plan👀😅😭😬🖤🫥

“At least they agree with me on one front. You're spineless. Have to tie up people to hurt them because it makes you feel like a male.”

—“Inadequate.” — *Alexa play dumb & poetic* cause “just cause you act like one doesn’t make you a man”

“Aelin huffed another laugh, haughty and cool, and gazed toward the ceiling, toward the lightening sky. The last she'd see, if she played this right.”

—NO NO NO LIGHTENING THATS ROWAN BABE HES RIGHT THERE NO NO NO!!!! NO LAST SKIES!! NOPE! NONONONONO — also note: the more swagger she has the worse things really are; so re-read TOG with that (anyone who calls her selfish or immature or not caring. No.) No, the more she does that the more it means she’s covering up. It’s her tell a lot of times (I think).

“There had always been another, a spare, to take her place should she fail. That her death would mean Dorian's, would send those hateful gods to demand his life to forge the Lock...”

—I hate everyone that ever made her think her & Dorian are spares & feel like pons

“It was no strange thing, to hate herself for it.”

—THAT LINE IS GOING TO THERAPY

FRANTIC AND RAGING yeah me too

“Despite herself, her plans, she shoved back”

She still fought… she doesn’t want to die. She just doesn’t want this.

“RUN—”

—UH YEAH

“Something in her side snapped and she cried out, the sound small and broken, as she collided with the floor.”

Something forever snapped — not again — as she felt

“Fenrys had seen his twin drive a knife through his heart. Had watched Connall bleed out onto the tiles and die. — He'd sat in a stone room for two months, witness to what they'd done to a young queen's body, her spirit. Had been unable to help her as she'd screamed and screamed. He'd never stop hearing those screams. — But it was the sound that came out of her as Cairn hurled her into the chest of drawers where Fenrys had watched him arranging his tools, the sound she made as she hit the floor, that shattered him entirely.”

—NOW IM SHATTERED TOO—REALLY THIS IS THE FIRST TIME WE GET FENRYS PERPSECTIVE—OH GODS—NO—OW—I MEAN I DIDNT WANT IT EARLIER BUT DONT YOU DARE DIE ON ME LIKE THIS NOT NOW—2 months THATS HOW LONG — he called her the young queen

“A small sound. Quiet. Hopeless. He'd never heard it from her, not once.”

—As if a scream would bring no reprieve

a soul cracking in seconds

Cairn you are not worthy of a broken nose like Asterin the Queen no you deserve worse and less

“Aelin Galathynius stirred, trying to rise”

— “GET UP” — *later* fuck I didn’t mean it like that DAMN YOU CAIRN

“He pointed it at her like a sword. Fenrys strained against his invisible bindings.”

—he’s trying for her😭

I miss the TOG days😭 when stupid Cain was as bad as it got AND HE WAS HORRID

“Aelin glanced at him, toward where he'd sat for the past two days, in that same damned spot by the tent wall.”

—TWO DAYS

“Despair shone in her eyes. True despair, without light or hope. The sort of despair that wished for death. The sort of despair that began to erode strength, to eat away at any resolve to endure.”

—BUT SHES THE QUEEN OF THE ENDURING PEOPLE

“She blinked at him. Four times. I am here, I am with you.”

—those words and now I’m crying again

She doesn’t want him to feel alone without her because they’ve done this together

The language SHE created so he wouldn’t feel alone either the one she made to check on HIM not her and the one he made for her the six blink but the rest those were hers for them but for him too — THEIR FRIENDSHIP MEANS A LOT TO ME OKAY

“Fenrys knew it for what it was. The final message. Not before death, but before the sort of breaking that no one would walk away from.”

After before… before Maeve… Dorian did he’d survived the collar… but not this

“And Fenrys couldn't allow it.”

—Neither can I😭

BREAK THE OATH COME ON

“In his shredded soul, in what was left of him after all he'd been forced to see and do, he couldn't allow it.”

… and their about to be fucking wrong

The fact he says shredded soul because it already was that; while Gavriel and Lorcan describe the path breaking as that; Fenrys already felt it.

“The blood oath kept his limbs planted. A dark chain that ran into his soul.”

—that was the damned order… the cruelest thing… I hate Maeve so fucking much

“He would not allow it. That final breaking. He pushed upward against the bond's dark chain, screaming, though no sound came from his open maw. He pushed and pushed and pushed against those invisible chains, against that blood-sworn order to obey, to stay down, to watch.”

—That damned line was for him they had let him scream for her so he knew he could do nothing…

“He defied it. All that the blood oath was. Pain lanced through him, into his very core.”

Lorcan couldn't imagine doing it how it would happen

“He blocked it out as Cairn pointed the smoldering poker at the young queen with a heart of wildfire. He would not allow it. Snarling, the male inside him thrashing, Fenrys bellowed at the dark chain binding him. He shredded into it, biting and tearing with every scrap of defiance he possessed. Let it kill him, wreck him. He would not serve. Not another heartbeat. He would not obey. He would not obey. And slowly, Fenrys got to his feet.”

—more sobbing

“Stand down.”Fenrys snarled, deep and vicious. And still he struggled to his feet.

— get up

“Cairn pointed the poker at the rug. "Lie down. That is an order from your queen."”

—that’s not his queen anymore (never was)

“Fenrys spasmed, his hackles lifting. But he was standing. Standing. Despite the order, despite the blood oath's commands. Get up. From far away, the words sounded.

— who’s voice? Is that Aelin… Sam… Elena? Connall? Fenrys?

Cairn roared, "Lie down!" Fenrys's head thrashed from side to side, his body bucking against invisible chains. Against an invisible oath. His dark eyes met Cairn's. Blood began running from the wolf's nostril. It'd kill him—to sever the oath. It would break his soul. His body would go soon after that. But Fenrys put one paw forward. His claws dug into the ground. Cairn's face paled at that step. That impossible step. Fenrys's eyes slid toward hers. Neither needed the silent code between them for the word she beheld in his gaze. The order and plea. Run. Cairn read the word, too. And he hissed, "Not with a shattered spine, she can't," —

—NOOOOOOOOOOOOO—

— before he brought the poker slamming down for Aelin's back. With a roar, Fenrys leaped.”

THE WHITE WOLF LADIES AND GENTLEMAN👏👏👏

“And with it, he snapped the blood oath completely.”

—NEW OATH MAKE A NEW OATH AELIN — there has to be a way out of this😭

“Run.” Those words? Whose words? HoF ToG full circle

Chapter 27

“These were his last breaths, his last heartbeats.”

—HOW DARE YOU WITH THAT LINE—there has to be a way to save him — but she needs to run now

Fenrys don't die like this please

Fenrys commanded the queen to run so she did

The final code RUN

The sky again 🥹😭

COME ON RO—FIND HER NOW

“Turning them all to bloodied splinters.”

—Well that’s one way to do it

Chapter 28

“Aelin ran”

—Good listening

“Picked a direction, any direction but the river mists to her left, and ran. The sun was rising, and the army camp .. There was motion behind her. Shouting. She blocked it out and aimed right. Toward the rising sun, as if it were Mala's own welcoming embrace.

— Dear Reader; Pick somewhere and just run,

So many broken things and so much gone but here we are

It’s giving there were still flowers vibes

She is the rising sun

And that embrace is what Rowan had felt too

*hey siri play fresh out the slammer* now pretty baby I’m running back home to you… I’m running

“Still Aelin aimed for the eastern horizon. Toward the trees and mountains, toward the sun cresting over them.”

Mountains and oceans

Okay I hope that noise isn’t Rowan trying to get her attention but also bro best see SHES ALIVE

“And did not falter”

—there’s our queen

“Death sang to Lorcan.”

—Interesting how they always describe the magic as singing

"Someone's making a move this way," Lorcan murmured to Gavriel. "But Whitethorn's still over there.

—It’s HER

“Fenrys. Or Connall, perhaps. Maybe Essar's sister, who he'd never liked. But he wouldn't give a shit about that if she hadn't betrayed them.”

— You don’t know😭

“He pointed north.”

—She goes North (to the stag & home) it’s her TRUE NORTH

“Death glimmered. Whitethorn was nearly at the camp's center. And that force approaching their eastern entrance ...”

—glimmered or glamored?

—it’s just deaths bestie😅😬✌️ ya might call her Lady Death? lol crossover… plus idk I think Cassian & Lorcan would vibe + Elide / Nesryn & honestly all our favs would be besties

“To hell with waiting.”

—AGREED

Wild as fire and Endovier; if I had a nickel for everytime she went on a murder rampage escape

“Death flickered as the rising sun gilded the rolling grasses and set the dew steaming. Nothing. No indication of what, of who. He'd reached the first of the hollows that flowed to the camp edge, the dips narrow and steep, when Aelin Galathynius appeared.”

—flickered… to life? — WHO — Mala time

“Lorcan didn't expect the sob in his throat.”

—me too buddy me to, I forgive you, cause come on he just wants his besties happy & he’s thankful and aw buddy

“As he beheld the blood soaking her skin, the short white shift, her hair, longer than he'd last seen and plastered to her head with gore. His knees stopped working, and even his magic faltered at the sight of her wild, desperate race for the camp's edge.”

—babes rough; the hair note… why longer? how long has it been???

“Lorcan surged into motion, flaring his magic up and wide. Not to her, but to Whitethorn, still charging for the center of the camp.”

—lol he knows she got this Whitethorn needs a hand though

“She's here, she's here, she's here, he signaled.”

—another cadre code … plus more magic senses signaled.

“But Lorcan was too far, the grassy bumps and hollows between them now endless, as ten soldiers converged on Aelin, blocking her path toward the open field.”

Also like guys run she’s running for a reason go run for Fenrys and then from Caryn or kill Karen/Caryn and run from the soldiers FAST before Maeve or soemthing else comes back and

*Also yes I called him Karen cause Cairn is my least favorite Caryn*

“One swung his sword, a strike that would cleave her skull in two.”

—she’s got this COME ON GIRL

“The fool didn't realize who he faced. What he faced. That it wasn't a fire-breathing queen bound in iron who charged at him, but an assassin. Even as he ran for her, Lorcan could only gape at what unfolded.”

—holy fucking shit queen of the assassins & even Lorcan knows it: FIRE BREATHING QUEEN (he skips the derogatory🥹)

Foolish mortal

“She struck before they knew where to turn. Slash, duck, lunge. She got her other hand on one of their daggers. Then it was over.”

Certainly something to see

Very Whitethorn of her… the Whitethorn Galathynius’s have a way with swords

HE ran for HER😭 ok Lorcan u get a ton of points

—THE FACT LORCAN FINDS HER FIRST … *later edit* maybe it helps because she believes it’s real cause that’s too out there to believe & Maeve wouldn’t have known (side side note: how does that power work? cause she can’t read minds & the visions get messed up (hence why the Fenrys trick works) to know it’s real cause she doesn’t know the blinking code & Aelin can hear him whining in distance)

“Aelin didn't falter as they wilted to the ground. She charged past, aiming straight for the field and hills. To where Lorcan ran for her. He signaled again. To me, to me. Whether Aelin recognized it, or him, she still raced his way.”

she didn’t falter or wilt🥹 … did she know they would be here or just run and realize?

“She wouldn't make it, not over that terrain, not drained like that But she did.”

—HELL YEAH SHE FUCKING DID

“To her, to Whitethorn.”

—one in the same … could she hear the power flare? Is it another code or just HI

“Still more fired. Single shots this time, from so many directions he couldn't trace their sources. Trained archers, some of Maeve's best. Aelin had to- She already was. Aelin began zagging, depriving them of an easy target. Left to right, she darted over the hills, slower with each bump she cleared, each step toward Lorcan as he raced to her, a hundred yards remaining between them.”

—she knew, she made it easier with them too; she assisted in her rescue💅

“A wall of glittering gold got there first. From the north, leaping over the hollows, charged Gavriel. Aelin disappeared into a dip in the earth, and when she emerged, the Lion ran at her side, a golden shield around her. Not close to her—but in the air around them.”

—Aedion would be proud & Good cause she needs a little space — Ashryver gold?

—the lion

“Where it touched them, they died.”

“Blood oath or no, they were still his people. His soldiers. He'd prevent their deaths, if he could. Save them from themselves.

— oh Lorcy🥹🥺😭

“Aelin was stumbling now, and Lorcan cleared the last of the hills between them. He opened his mouth, to shout what, he didn't know, but a cry pierced the blue sky. The sob that came out of Aelin at the hawk's bellow of fury cracked Lorcan's chest.”

—mine too😭

“But she kept running for the trees, for their cover. Lorcan and Gavriel fell into step beside her, and when she again stumbled, those too-thin legs giving out, Lorcan gripped her under the arm and hauled her along.”

—a team… seems like HER cadre of you ask me😂😉🤷‍♀️

“Fast as a shooting star, Rowan dove for them. He reached them as they passed the first of the trees, shifting as he landed.”

—A star for his fireheart

Aelin sprawling onto the pine-covered ground.”

—Pine

“Rowan was instantly before her, hands going to the mask on her face, the chains, the blood coating her arms, her torn body—

—THE REUINION😭

Oh the times have changed😭

“Aelin let out another sob, and then moaned, "Fenrys." It took Lorcan a moment to understand. Took her pointing behind them, to the camp, as she said again, as if speech was beyond her, "Fenrys." Her breath was a wet rasp. A plea. A broken, bloody plea.

—her first words were to save him

Rowan turned from his mate. The rage in Rowan's eyes could devour the world. And that rage was about to extract the sort of vengeance only a mated male could command.”

SAVE HIM NOW

—And for her Rowan would to let her cry no more & for his brother

“Rowan’s canines flashed, but his voice was deadly soft as he said to Lorcan, "Take her to the glen." A jerk of his chin to Gavriel. "You're with me."

—a glen sounds nice right about now 😅🥹😭

With a final look toward Aelin, his frozen rage a brewing storm on the wind, the prince and the Lion were gone, charging back toward the chaotic, bloody camp.

—The way she uses ice for him and Dorian is great symbolism

GO GET OUR BOY NOW THAT WE HAVE OUR GIRL

Chapter 29

“That they'd found her. Or she had found them, it seemed.”

—as always they found each other HE FOUND HER

“I will find you.”😭

“And when Rowan had seen her, first from the skies and then beside her, when he smelled the blood, both her own and others', when he beheld the chains and the iron mask clamped over her face, when she was sobbing at the sight of him, terror and despair coating her scent-The rage that roiled through him had no space for mercy. No room for compassion.”

Cairn’s gonna get it finally

“Fenrys was with her. Or had been.”

“I am here. I am with you.”😭

She’s broken that box though... I knew it… while I never wanna see Cairn’s face cause I’d just wanna punch it his expression when she started breaking out must’ve been hilarious… also like does she have super strength then?

THANK THE GODS FENRYS IS ALIVE

Hurry though the path… there’s gotta be a double path… or magic or something😭 ELENA SHOW UP AGAIN PLEASE

“What had happened here, what had been so terrible that the wolf had been able to do the impossible to spare Aelin from enduring it?”

“Her blood sang to him of pain and despair, of utter terror. His Fireheart.”

😭😭😭

Well that metaphor got literal🤢… guess Cairn is rot

They both have that couples who get revenge together stay together thing down😅😅

Chapter 30

“First shivering in the dark, then watching the sky bleed to gray, then at last blue.”

—Good time keeping

Yes I write color words in the color they are it makes my brain happy when I can😂

“Elide didn't know what to do. With her body, her hands. Didn't know what to say as Aelin stumbled over root and rock, the mask and the chains clanking, blood soaking her. Not just blood from her own wounds, but those of others. She was thin, her golden hair so much longer. Too long, even with the time apart. It fell nearly to her navel, most of it dark with caked blood. As if she'd run through a rain of it.”

—cry happy tears is an acceptable option cause me too

& why does everyone keep mentioning the hair? What does it mean?

And yeah she kinda did run through bloody rain (not a midnight girlie I guess)😅😬

“But there was little recognition in Aelin's eyes, shadowed with the mask.”

Real or not real? — she’s giving Annie HG vibes

“As if her body didn’t quite belong to her”

—quote that hit home & will be going to my therapist cause this book represents and speaks to so much… it’s cathartic and utterly destructive

"Take it off."

—noooo this scene😭 not mentally stable enough for this

"Take it off." The queen's guttural words were swallowed by the moss-crusted trees.

"I'm trying," Lorcan said-not gently, though certainly without his usual coldness.

—be nice bruh

But I almost appreciate him being him & treating her normally… like eventually that’s gotta be a relief

And yet he is being nice and not cold not for the bleeding Fireheart in front of him

“Aelin stared at the broken blade, at the shard in the greenery cushioning her bare, bloodied feet, her breaths coming faster and faster.”

—something else broke

“Then she dropped the dagger into the moss. Began clawing at the shackles on her arms, the gauntlets on her hands, the mask on her face. "Take it off," she begged as she scratched and tugged and yanked. "Take it off!" Elide reached a hand for her, to stop her before she ripped the skin clean off her bones, but Aelin dodged away, staggering deeper into the clearing. The queen dropped to her knees, bowing over them, and clawed at the mask. It didn't so much as move.”

“He was frozen, eyes wide as Aelin knelt in the moss, as her breathing became edged with sobs. He had done this. Led them to this.”

—yes that’s what he’s thinking too

The queen's gauntlets drew blood where they scraped into her neck, her jaw, as she heaved against the mask. "Take it off!" The plea turned into a scream. "Take it off!" Over and over, the queen screamed it. "Take it off, take it off, take it off!" She was sobbing amid her screaming, the sounds shattering through the ancient forest. She said no other words.

—the heartache in this chapter made me cry because it’s known, that skin crawling insanity feeling

Pleaded to no gods, no ancestors. Only those words, again and again and again. Take it off, take it off, take it off.

—she’d long since stopped asking them for help

This is going to haunt us all

FENRYS BE OKAY PLEASE

ROWAN HELP HER

“Rowan had barely entered the clearing before he set down the wolf and stalked for Aelin. The prince was covered in blood. From his unhindered steps, Elide knew it wasn't his.”

“Aelin ripped at the immovable mask, either unaware or uncaring of the prince before her. Her consort, husband, and mate. "Aelin." Take it off, take it off, take it off. Her screams were unbearable. Worse than those that day on the beach in Eyllwe.

“golden skin pale as he took in the frantic queen.”

—even he felt it

“Slowly, Rowan knelt before her. "Aelin." She only tipped her head up to the forest canopy and sobbed. Blood ran down her neck from the scratches she'd dug into her skin, mingling with what already coated her. Rowan reached out a trembling hand, the only sign of the agony Elide had little doubt was coursing through him. Gently, he laid his hands on her wrists; gently, he closed his fingers around them. Halting the brutal clawing and digging.”

—officially in the all time list of scenes that destroyed my soul and made me legitimately cry and bring it to therapy cause this is something very real and raw and absolutely heartbreaking but understood

“Aelin sobbed, her body shuddering with the force of it. "Take it off." Rowan's eyes flickered, panic and heartbreak and longing shining there. "I will. But you have to be still, Fireheart. Just for a few moments." "Take it off." The sobs ebbed, tricking into something broken and raw. Rowan ran his thumbs over her wrists, over those iron shackles. As if it were nothing but her skin. Slowly, her shaking eased.”

—only he could get through to his Fireheart😭

“No, not eased, Elide realized as Rowan rose to his feet and stalked behind the queen. But contained, turned inward. Tremors rippled through Aelin's tense body, but she kept still.”

—something worse

“Yet something like shock, then horror and sorrow, flashed over his face, as he surveyed her back.”

His marks gone, her scars gone, all of it gone.

“Unthreatening.”

—they knew

“Fenrys remained out, his white coat soaked with blood.”

—SARAH ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL MY VERY SOUL

“Elide only walked to Aelin and took up the spot where Rowan had been. The queen's eyes were closed, as if it took all her concentration to remain still for another heartbeat, to allow them to look, to not claw at the irons. So Elide said nothing, demanded nothing from her, save for a companion if she needed one.”

I love Elide🥹😭😭😭❤️‍🩹 she’s just kind. And good. She’s also quite good at reading people.

“Aelin began shaking again. Elide put a hand on her knee. Aelin had scraped it raw, mud and grass stuck in her blood-crusted skin. She waited for the queen to shove her hand away, but Aelin didn't move. Kept her eyes shut, her ragged breathing holding steady.”

—how gentle they all are😭😭😭this is why i love them

“They'd sever the iron if they had to.”

—JUST DO IT — DAM U MAEVE WHAT DID YOU DO

NOTHING.—DAMN IT

Also Fenrys😅😅😅😭😭😭😭😭

“They were empty. Wholly drained. A warrior accepting defeat.”

—but Elide didn’t😭🫶 — wise girl🥺🥹

“Two blinks. As if that meant something. — Aelin again blinked twice with that strange intentionality.”

*looks up chart* “No.”

Clever girl noticed it meant more *Then Rowan does too (cause he knows her)*

DONT TALK ABOUT THE SECRET KEY — but yes thankfully they do

"A Wyrdmark," Rowan said softly. "To open."

—He knew. He understood. She's lost. But he isn’t. Not with her.

“Kneeling before her, he extended his bloodied hand. "Show me, Fireheart. Show me again." He tapped her ankle-the shackle there.”

—Without thought he held that for her

“Her eyes lifted to his, like the scent of his blood posed some question. "I am your mate," Rowan whispered, as if it was the answer she sought. And the love in his eyes, in the way his voice broke, his bloodied hand trembling...”

—he knew… sobbing again… they never got that moment😭😭😭 & she knows Cairn’s gone… and it’s him😭

The fae side understanding

“Elide's throat tightened.”

—me too😭😭😭

“Aelin only looked at the blood pooling”

—not that memory please😭🖤

“Her fingers curled, the gauntlet clicking. As if it were another answer, too.”

"She can't do it with the iron," Elide said. "If it's on her hands. It interferes with the magic in the blood."

“A blink from her, in that silent language.”

“Yes.”—And again CLEVER ELIDE

It’s giving good thing hermione pays attention in herbology class

"It's why she put them on you, isn't it," Elide said, her chest straining. "To be sure you couldn't use your own blood with the Wyrdmarks to free yourself." As if all the other iron wasn't already enough.

—Swearing like Lorcan because whyyyy

“Another blink, her face still so hollow and cold. Tired.”

— so tired.😭

“Rowan's jaw clenched. But he just dipped his finger into the blood in his palm and offered his hand to her. "Show me, Fireheart," he said again.”

—Fireheart😭 I’ve missed them❤️‍🩹🥲

“Elide could have sworn he shuddered, and not from fear, as Aelin's metal-crusted hand closed around his.”

the beautiful, horrible gauntlets

“A flare of light, a click of metal, and then it slid free. Her face was pale so pale, all traces of the sun-kissed coloring gone. And empty. Aware, and yet not. Wary.”

"I'll do it," Rowan said, his voice still soft, still full of that love. He moved behind her, and Elide stared at the horrible mask, the suns and flames carved and embossed along its ancient surface.”

—I remember

GAVRIEL BOWED AT THE QUEEN

And she trusted him to go to a blind spot

Even as the flare of power contracted into an aura around the queen, a shimmering second skin.

—safe

“Rowan. Rowan, whose breathing became jagged, his swallow audible. "Aelin?"”

“The name, it seemed, was an unlocking, too. Not of the queen she'd so briefly known, but the power inside her.”

—Aelin Ashryver Galathynius the rightful Heir of Fire and lost Queen of Terrasen

“Elide flinched as flame, golden and blazing, erupted around the queen. The shift burned away into ashes. Aelin knelt there, burning”

“The flames flickered around her, though the moss, the roots, did not burn.”

—its all that magic

“Not a single scar. The ones Elide had marked in those days before Aelin had been taken were gone.”

—what did they do?

“As if someone had wiped them away.”

—they stole every trace

Chapter 31

“They had taken her scars. Maeve had taken them all away.”

—taken everything

“It told Rowan enough about what had been done. When he'd seen her back, the smooth skin where the scars of Endovier and the scars from Cairn's whipping should have been, he'd suspected. But kneeling, burning in nothing but her skin.. There were no scars where there should have been. The almost-necklace of them from Baba Yellowlegs: gone. The shackle marks from Endovier: gone. The scar where she'd been forced by Arobynn Hamel to break her own arm: gone. And on her palms ... It was upon her exposed palms that Aelin now gazed.”

—her oaths her memories her history… gone. Foreign. Forgotten. Even the story on the tattoo

“As if realizing what was missing. The scars across her palms, one from the moment they had become carranam, the other from her oath to Nehemia, had disappeared entirely. Like they had never been. Her flames burned brighter.”

“Healers could remove scars, yes, but the most likely reason for the lack of them on Aelin, on all the places where he'd once traced them with his hands, his mouth ... It was new skin. All of it.”

“Nearly every inch of her was covered in new skin, unvarnished as fresh snow. The blood coating her had burned away to reveal it. New skin, because they'd needed to replace what had been destroyed. To heal her so they could begin again and again.”

The canvas and the cruelty.

A worse scar was left. … Invisible and destructive.

"He doesn't have much longer."

No.

The fact she said “No.” In code

“He'd broken the blood oath. Through sheer will, Fenrys had broken it. And would soon pay the price when his life force bled out entirely.”

“From her hands, her horrifically pristine skin, to the wolf across the clearing.

“She blinked twice.”

—blinking code

“Unaware or uncaring of her nakedness, she took an unsteady step.”

—she doesn’t care… she is lost, somewhere else

“Rowan was instantly there—or as close as the flames would allow. He could push through, shielding himself in ice or simply by cutting off the air that fed her flames. But to cross that line, to shove into her flames when so much, too much, had been stolen from her ... He didn't let himself think about the distant, wary recognition on her face when she'd seen him-seen all of them. As if she wasn't entirely certain to trust them.”

—he gives her time

—let her feel safe

“Aelin managed another step, teetering. He glimpsed her neck as she passed. Even the twin bite marks, his mark of claiming, had vanished.”

—a certain grief

“Sorrow softened her face, even with that quiet distance. Sorrow, and gratitude. Gavriel and Elide remained on Fenrys's other side as she approached. Backed away a step. Not from fear, but to give her space in this moment of farewell. They had to go.”

—but they would give her this

COME ON THIS CANT BE THE END

“Rowan couldn't bring himself to say it. To tell Aelin that it might not be wise to draw out this good-bye the way she needed. They had minutes, at best, to spare before they had to be on the move.”

—don’t say it DO SOMETHING

“He'd make sure they didn't get close enough to disturb her. Gavriel and Lorcan seemed to be having the same thought, their eyes meeting from across the clearing.

—a small kindness

“Aelin knelt beside Fenrys, and her flame enveloped them both. The fire gave way to a reddish-gold aura, a shield that he knew would melt the flesh of anyone who tried to cross. It flowed and rippled around them, a bubble of coppery air.”

—safety. Protection. … maybe some plan😭

Blood bound… no, not to him.

NO SILBA

JOY FOR HER😭

“Aelin spoke again, the sound either contained or swallowed by her shield. No tears. Only that sorrow—and clarity. A queen's face.”

—the woman on fire and the wolf

— YES QUEEN DO IT!

—but she offered it. She wouldn’t make him. But it would be An oath for an oath. … Random nonsense: can only queens give oaths? … she wouldn’t make him live if he didn’t want to…

“Aelin spoke again, and Fenrys blinked once in answer. She deemed that answer enough.”

“YES.”

And thus it begins Aelin & HER cadre *alexa play you should see me in a crown*

"Holy gods," Lorcan breathed as Aelin extended her bleeding forearm to Fenrys's mouth. "Holy rutting gods."

—yep that’s what she is now

“For Fenrys's loyalty, for his sacrifice, there was no greater reward she could offer. To keep him from death, there was no other way to save him. Only this. Only the blood oath.”

—I KNEW IT… answers that question I guess😂

“As he swore a silent vow to their queen, blinking a few more times.”

—secret language comes in handy and saves lives once again!

I am here I am with you (probably… liar would be weird lol) yes also is a possibility

“Severing the blood oath to one queen had snapped his life force, his soul. Swearing the blood oath to another might very well repair that cleaving, the ancient magic binding Fenrys's fading life to Aelin's.”

“Aelin curled on her side next to him, flames encompassing them both.”

“Aelin mouthed a short, curt word. Fenrys did not respond. She spoke again, that queen's face unfaltering. Live. She'd use the blood oath to force him to remain on this side of life. Still Fenrys didn't stir. Across the bubble of flame and heat, Elide put a hand over her mouth, eyes shining bright. She'd read the word on Aelin's lips, too. Aelin spoke a third time, teeth flashing as she gave Fenrys her first order. Live. Rowan didn't breathe as they waited. Long minutes passed. Then Fenrys's eyes cracked open. Aelin held the wolf's gaze, nothing in her face save that grave, unyielding command. Slowly, Fenrys stirred. His paws shifted beneath him, legs straining. And he rose.”

—they do not yield. They get up.

Live.

love laugh

—it’s giving platonic than eat vibes

“But there was Fenrys, standing before their now-kneeling queen. And there was Fenrys, inclining his head, shoulders dipping with him, one paw sweeping before the other. Bowing. A ghost of a smile graced her mouth, gone before it ever took form.”

puppy bow🥹

OH THANK THE GODS

“His gaze met Rowan's, and Rowan smiled, bowing his head.”

—respect bruh

"Welcome to the court, pup,"

—gonna go cry now too😭

Oh poor Aedion😅😅 no one tell him till he gets the oath next😅😬 I MEAN YOU CANT BE MAD AT HER

Raw emotion rippled across that lupine face, and then Fenrys turned back to Aelin. She was staring at nothing. Fenrys nudged her shoulder with his furry head.

—and then she’s lost again😭ow

“Maeve had cleaved into Rowan's own mind to trick his very instincts. What had she done to her? What had she done these months?”

—that is the one that haunts us all

Where is her mind at?

“Fenrys slid dark, baleful eyes to Lorcan. Oh, that fight would come. That vengeance. The wolf gave him a curt nod.”

— *dundundun* (not gonna lie forgot over what though)

"The Little Folk."

—Iltsm—The calm childlike little folk moment🥹 fairy woods… what I expect when reading about faeries… though idk what they look like but the fan art is all over the place adorable

“A miracle-that's what had happened with the queen and the wolf.”

“Rowan's eyes settled on Aelin. "They saved her life once." That night Erawan's assassin had returned for Aelin. "They will do so again now."”

—true. and I still have questions so let’s go… since when r u mr hopeful Rowan?

“Rowan kept a step behind Aelin and Fenrys”

—her shield up

“Aelin had said nothing, done nothing except rise when they told her it was time to go. Rowan had offered her his cloak, and she'd allowed it.”

“A warm cloak in a cold dungeon”

— A cloak & a wolf her only trust

“She only walked on.”

—forward… is she power drilling? Or thinking it’s a dream? Or just lost?

“A vision of old, striding through the trees, the queen and the wolf.”

“So close--only twenty or so miles to the mountain house he'd built. He'd planned to take Aelin there one day, though it was nothing but long-vanished ashes. Just to show her where the house had been, where he'd buried Lyria. She was still up there, his mate-who-had-never-been. And his true mate... She strode unwavering through the trees. No more than a wraith.”

—he’d thought about this😭

“He prayed they had a place to stay for the night. A place where Aelin might sleep, and might remain protected from Maeve's eyes once she realized she'd been tricked.”

—he just wants her to have peace😭

“But Elide and Gavriel walked toward it, unfazed”

—sounds about right lol (trust the logics)

“And behind them, Aelin continued as well. So Rowan followed her, as he would follow her until his last breath, and beyond it.”

—my WYRD these quotes

“Aelin illuminated the space, bathing the black stone walls in a golden glow bright enough to see by.”

“Magic--old, strange magic, those lights. Like they'd been plucked from the night sky.”

—sounds lovely & also night court

“Aelin did not pause as she strode for one of the glittering walls. There was none of her usual caution, no dart of her eyes as she weighed the exits and pitfalls, potential weapons to wield.”

The story she told herself again and again even in this fairytale realm of little folk present

—too tired to care too out of it for sure and the weird habits gone and sadness in seeing it

“A trance--it was almost as if she had slipped into a trance, plunged into some depthless ocean inside herself and drifted so far down that they might as well have been birds soaring over its distant surface.”

—exactly — it’s how she had survived it — secret gardens in her mind

“Aelin's steps were silent on the stone. Fenrys halted nearby, as if to give her privacy. But he lingered in the center of the space as his mate paused before the shining, living wall. There was no expression on her face, no tension in her body. Yet she inclined her head to the Little Folk half-hidden in the branches and boughs before her. Her jaw moved--speaking. Brief, short words.”

“He'd never so much as heard of the Little Folk talking. But there was his queen, his wife, his mate, murmuring with them.”

—the awe he has for her🥹😭

“her wildfire eyes as flat and cold as the lake.”

—still gaining fire

“Safe. The Little Folk must have told her this cave was safe, if she now moved for the fire, her own sphere of it still burning bright.”

—safe.

— trust and pixie little folk dust?😅😂

“But Aelin paid them no heed, paid the world no heed, as she took up a spot between the fire and the cave wall, lay upon the bare stone, and closed her eyes.”

— To rest — his wish answered… how long has it been since she did this?

Well, it wasn’t a QoS reuinion but I can finally rest now too😅😭

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