#if you see me downloading your fic as a .epub look away

[boltlightning]

Stupid question maybe but how do you find time and energy and excitement to read books?

Don't get me wrong, I like reading as a form of media. And I have a couple of fanfics I'm keeping up with, and even ones I reread. I think it's important for my vocabulary and on seeing the world. Surprisingly, a fanfic I read helped me a lot in understanding and processing complex trauma.

But at the same time, books intimidate me. I bought a book I know I want to read but actually reading it just scares me. Maybe this is the TikTok attention span (although I always just read with music and in bed). Or the fact I know the book is an emotional piece, either way I can't get myself to start.

Or perhaps it's the fact my brain feels overfull with so much that there's no place for new media unless it's in an universe I'm already familiar with, or forced down my throat by proxy/society.

Are you just inherently excited to read about stuff, or do you also have like a moment where you fight yourself to get started to read?

Also please feel free to ramble about more books you think people should read!

this is an EXCELLENT question, and one i don't know that i'm the best person to answer! i'm pretty flighty about reading and have only gotten back into it within the last two years or so, and largely during lockdown. i have a miserable, internet-y attention span as well, and with so much competing for our attention these days, it can be REALLY hard sitting down somewhere quiet with a book and tuning everything out. i definitely relate.

firstly, i think that fic is a great way to get back into reading! they build up your attention span, depending on the fic, and let you understand what kind of stories you like to read for free, even if it's involving characters you already know. reading work by your peers is always, always valuable.

specifically for the book you own that you know you want to read: make a date with the book! like, literally, set a date and time you know you're free, put an alarm in your phone. put the book somewhere you can see it every day. mentally prepare yourself for it as the hour approaches. do this until you find yourself wanting to pick it up on your own, or until you finish the book. making it a chore seems counterintuitive but sometimes it's the only way to get started.

more tips for getting back into reading in general are below the cut. in general i've sorta...bullied myself into remembering i enjoy this activity. that's also come with the realization that being kind to myself and knowing my preferences are key to building the habit up.

my more learned mutuals, if you have anything to add or books to recommend, please do!!

it's ok to only read what you want to read. it's ok to not finish books. you don't NEED to read big-brain nonfiction or archaic classics if you're not interested in them. and if you don't like something, put it down. you don't have to stay in the world if you don't like it!

use the one-third rule: this works for all other media too. if you start to read something and don't immediately jive with it, read until you're 1/3rd of the way through. if nothing's happened to grab you, that usually means that the book isn't for you and you can move on. you gave it a fair shake! you can let go! this often helps me realize i'm in the headspace for a different kind of story, and that's ok!

make it an accomplishment. i have an awful and ugly spreadsheet where i write down what books i've read this year, when i finished them, and what i thought. my favorite part of finishing a book is writing a short stupid review in this spreadsheet. it's only for me, and yet it feels good to check names off a list.

read books with peers. a huge part of why i read jane austen's novels was because i wanted to understand what everyone on tumblr was talking about, and it's been very fun!! as much as i begrudge it, i think this is the appeal of booktok, honestly — it's fun to meme on stories with your friends. you don't necessarily need to join a book club, but it can be really encouraging to read a book your friend recommended and read it so you can talk to/joke with them about it.

find out how you like to read, and when/where you'll actually do it. for instance, i haaaate audio books and refuse to read on my phone. i'll save good/exciting books to read on the exercise bike to reward myself for biking, or make a fancy coffee to accompany a book i'm struggling to start. treat yourself. trick your brain into associating the physical act of reading with the happy brain chemicals.

reread stuff you liked when you were into reading. i own most of my favorite books just for this purpose. there is no shame in rereading! there is no age limit on any book!! if i feel like my writing is suffering i will usually revisit a childhood favorite just to kickstart my brain.

books i would recommend for getting back into reading (these are all fiction and mostly fantasy/sci-fi. sorry. just what i'm into)

the princess bride by william goldman

a wizard of earthsea by ursula k. le guin

howl's moving castle by diana wynne jones

inkheart by cornelia funke

forestborn by elayne audrey becker

fireborne by rosaria munda

treasure island by robert louis stevenson (language is old, but it's a classic for a reason)

spinning silver by naomi novik. i liked uprooted by her too but it's not as universally loved. damn i should reread these

everyone go read temeraire right now please. thanks

a psalm for the wild-built by becky chambers

nettle & bone by t. kingfisher

the blue castle by l.m. montgomery

this is how you lose the time war by amal el-mohtar and max gladstone

books i would recommend if you want something more toothsome

pride and prejudice by jane austen (again, language is old, but what a banger. persuasion is my favorite by her but a lot heavier)

another oldie: north and south by elizabeth gaskell (although it is often described as pride and prejudice but in the industrial era)

piranesi by susanna clarke

the lies of locke lamora by scott lynch (i would've put this in the previous category if i could. this is great fun, but SO dense)

feast of sorrow by crystal king

the left hand of darkness by ursula k. le guin

notes from the burning age by claire north

genuinely: shakespeare. if you liked a play when you were in school you should reread it as an adult, on your own terms, with a glossary pulled up. they take at most 2 hours to read. i prommy.

i hope...any of this is helpful. again, mutuals, please feel free to add recs or tips <3

[colorisbyshe]

Just some “you might not have thought about it” tips if you are even VAGUELY at risk for losing power during the upcoming storm (other posts have covered the basics, here’s some things that are easy to forget)--

gas stations can lose power too, get gas for your car now. you don’t need a full tank but if it takes several days for power to restore... having over half a tank is good

things to charge ahead of time: portable/external chargers for your phones or electronics, charge up your kindles and switch too (once you get past survival mode in an outage, it’s fucking BORING), if you have a book light or any flashlights, charge them or see if they need batteries. have fresh batteries on hand.

remember: do NOT open your fridge/freezer unless it’s to QUICKLY grab something. you do not want food to spoil. idc if it’s cold out, food can be sensitive. power outages can last days. you want your fridge to stay as cold as possible for as long as possible.

if you have a gas stove, it probably won’t ignite BUT it can still release gas, you can light the stovetop with a match/lighter (BE CAREFUL) so you can still cook some things. this does not work with the oven itself.

if you can, focus on eating perishables that are only good if eaten after being cooked before the storm and leave “can be eaten cold/on stove top” stuff for the weekend. if there’s snow or flooding or the stores lose power, you might not be able to replenish your stock.

look up emergency numbers before the storm starts and save them in your phone

you know how i mentioned boredom before? if you can, download all the episodes of tv or books or whatever you can on to a kindle, your laptop, whatever can stay on for a while after you lose power. grab a library book NOW instead of waiting into the storm. hell, download epubs of the fic you’ve been meaning to read.

check your towns twitter account or website. see if they have already posted heating or electricity stations around town in case of a storm. these can save lives.

there’s a chance that if YOU lose power, even people down the street from you still have it. if you have friends/family local, call them after you lose power and see if they still have power. do not be afraid to ask to stay the night or even just go over to shower/eat/charge stuff. but, again, your town might be offering places where you can do that! do not fret if you don’t have local people you can rely on.

if you can, refill prescriptions NOW if they are at risk of running out over the weekend or early next week. you do not want to try to refill a prescription during any level of chaos.

if you’re facing high winds, use bungee cords to keep the lids on your garbage cans, and, if you can, to keep the cans attached to something (a porch, a pole, wahtever) because those fuckers WILL blow away and leave garbage EVERYWHERE

the power outage i went through wasn’t that long (3 days) but it was enough to make me VERY aware of all the things we hadn’t done to prep.

[realbigpodcastslut]

okay really weird question but like. would you be willing to make a mini tutorial thingies on calibre? or like tell me if there's any useful tutorial you've used to understand it? I've been fighting with it to fix up my mother's kindle and it is so strongly winning so far it's almost embarrassing.

Yeah of course! Calibre is honestly so confusing and not intuitive. You can still upload fanfic without Calibre (I use it for fanfics I want to read but don't kee) but you need to figure out how to email it to your Kindle. It's a bit complex so I recommend googling it. Also, it can be buggy and ugly.

Anyways, once you've downloaded Calibre onto your computer and have downloaded your preferred fics (.mobi isn't supported on all Kindles so I use .epub) and open up calibre. Go to "Add Books" and navigate to your downloaded fics. Click on them and then they're added to your Calibre library.

If you want to do fancy stuff, click your fic, and in the top menu click "edit metadata". There you can add a cover (I made my own if they didn't have one like the really popular ones) or change the author or whatever. AO3 tends to export all the data anyway.

Finally, plug your Kindle into your computer. You might have to click allow device to access files but all you need to do is click your fic on Calibre and in the top menu (if it's not there go to preferences or right-click). Then click "send to device". Wait until the jobs in the bottom right are 0 and boom. New fics. Unplug. Oh and if the covers don't load, plug the Kindle back in and in the top menu there should be an arrow for the device and then an option to refresh cache metadata on the kindle.

If you want to import a series as one file this is more tricky. You need to download the Epub merger plugin and install it. (merger plugin and how to install plugins into Calibre (don't unzip the plugins!)). Download your fics (I can't recommend any software because they all break on large series). Then run through the plugin steps. You'll get a new separate file. Just follow the above steps.

I'm still pretty not great at calibre but this is what I use and it serves me quite well!

Btw this is what my library looks like. See in the top right is a 66-part fic that I absolutely was NOT going to download as separate parts. It's also pretty easy to update (do the merge) and to navigate cause every fic is considered a new chapter. Also, any chapters in the fics are still there to navigate in. You can get away with some huge fics cause I believe the max file size for a paperwhite is 200MB.

Hope this helped!

[blueberryraindrops]

Blueberry’s Ultimate T-Rated TUA Masterlist

KEY

Fics are organised alphabetically (articles e.g. ‘the’ will not count)

Download links are EPUB files only

authors can feel free to send me a msg if they want their fics’ download link taken down

Regular updates can be expected as long as I remain in the fandom

Last Update: 14/10/2020

Other Masterlists: All Fics; G-Rated; M-Rated; E-Rated

FANFICTION

☁︎ another cog in the murder machine by Ford_Ye_Fiji { T }

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Five finally gets the breakdown he deserves

☁︎ Blood like Lemonade by Ford_Ye_Fiji { T }

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Hunting high and low to seek revenge, Brand new moral code, got made reluctant renegade. Leaving empty souls when he avenged, Evil spirits flowed he drank the blood like lemonade.

Five's sordid past comes to light in, quite possibly, the most unpleasant way

☁︎ Details [Series] by VeteranKlaus { T }

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The last time Klaus saw his siblings was at Allison and Patrick's wedding. A lot had changed since then; including the not-so-accidental, irreversible loss of his sight.

There's no time to tell them that, though. Not with the return of their long-presumed-dead brother and the impending apocalypse. Plus, it doesn't matter. He's got Ben as a good seeing-eye ghost.

☁︎ do androids dream of electric sheep? by the_crownless_queen { T }

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Number Four is crying, and Grace was made to care for those children.

In which Grace was created to protect the children of the Academy. Even, as it turns out, from their father.

☁︎ don't waste your time (or time will waste you) by rosewitchx { T }

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He was an old man. He is sixteen. Ben dies next week. How does he know that? “I think I broke it,” Five stutters, and for the first time in her short life Vanya sees absolute terror in his eyes.

Or, Five travels back again. Something goes wrong.

☁︎ Fighting (Pre)Determinism by chibi_tantei { T / WIP }

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They go back in time, determined to rewrite their own family history. Only problem is, only one of them looks the proper age to get near their younger selves.

Or, six months after Five stormed out, determined to time travel, he returns home. His siblings are happy to have him back, but he's acting differently...

(Or, Five goes undercover as himself. Twice the siblings should make saving the world easier, right? Yet somehow, he's only now realizing how many issues his family has to fix.)

☁︎ Five and Dave's Life Changing (Life Saving) Field Trip by neuronary { T }

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The little boy, who Dave could now see was not as little as he’d first thought, shoved a tin mug at him. “Drink this.”

Dave drank. It tasted sickly sweet and slightly citrus-y. “Who are you?”

“Five.” The boy’s scowl deepened at Dave’s confusion. “Klaus’ brother.”

Or, Five saves Dave's life to stop Klaus from moping. From Dave's perspective, a very grouchy, sleep-deprived twelve-year-old kidnaps him and he finds it much more entertaining than he should.

☁︎ haven't you heard of meditation? by rosesareredvioletsareblue { T }

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"Klaus, you have a piece of glass sticking out of your neck!"

Klaus felt for the glass, wincing as he found it.

"Oh yeah. Fun." It took all of Five's willpower not to throttle him.

☁︎ Hidden Variables Theory, The by siriuspiggyback { T }

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Something has disturbed the space-time continuum, and it's up to Five to figure out what it is.

With a bit of luck, and a lot of alcohol, he might even manage to do it before he snaps and murders his siblings.

☁︎ haven't you heard of meditation? by rosesareredvioletsareblue { T }

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"Klaus, you have a piece of glass sticking out of your neck!"

Klaus felt for the glass, wincing as he found it.

"Oh yeah. Fun." It took all of Five's willpower not to throttle him.

☁︎ Hidden Variables Theory, The by siriuspiggyback { T }

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Something has disturbed the space-time continuum, and it's up to Five to figure out what it is.

With a bit of luck, and a lot of alcohol, he might even manage to do it before he snaps and murders his siblings.

☁︎ i'm gonna be here til i'm nothing (but bones in the ground) by iguessyouregonnamissthepantyraid { T }

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Someone definitely just punched him in the chest, right? That’s the reason for that feeling? Or that last batch of pills had something seriously off-label mixed into them. Because there’s no way. There’s no fucking way.

He squeezes his eyes shut until dots burst behind his eyelids, but when he opens them, the hallucination doesn’t go away.

“… Five?”

☁︎ if the sky comes falling down by synchronicities { T }

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The equations are still wrong.

In 2002, Number Seven wonders why her siblings are acting odd.

(Or, the post-finale “Vanya doesn’t remember the time travel” fic)

☁︎ If You're Different And You Know It (you're not alone) by M3zzaTh3M3z { T }

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Five was different. He’d always known. Different from most people, what with his freakish birth, powers and unconventional upbringing, all that old news. And different from his siblings. He was smarter. His powers were stronger. And he’d never picked a name. All that was old news too. But there was something else that separated him from the rest, something he didn’t know how to put a finger on, how to categorize, analyse, understand. Five didn’t like not understanding. It was probably Klaus that made him first notice something was off.

☁︎ Is the sadness everlasting? (love, I think it is) by ArmedWithMyComputer { T }

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A look into what Klaus' newly discovered ability could mean for the siblings.

Diego could feel his whole body trembling as he faced the ghosts, only able to take shallow breaths as he struggled to process the true horror of what he was seeing.

And then they started howling.

The sound pierced though his stupor and forced him to his knees instantly. It was like nothing Diego had ever experienced before, and he was consumed with the intensity and overwhelmed by a deep chilling fear. It felt as though his mind had been taken over and all he could hear was the shrieks of grief, more intense than any emotion he had ever felt.

☁︎ It Does(n't) Matter by MYSTERYstew { T }

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It’s a familiar feeling, being lifted up by Luther and tossed around like he weighs nothing (to Luther he certainly does), it was a favorite move of Luther’s as a child. Nostalgia is not what Five feels, he’s too busy flailing as Luther throws him over the railing.

or, Five fails a jump

☁︎ Just One Minute by willowhisperer { T }

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Five holds up his end of the deal, soaked in blood. The Handler decides to toy with him a little while longer.

Maybe it's revenge, maybe she's riding the high of her shiny new position as head of the Commission.

Really, she just wants to win, once and for all.

☁︎ Lessons 'verse [Series] by Soulykins { T }

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Five was maybe four years old when he figured out that he was pretty much ride or die for his siblings. He was also four when he figured out that in the Umbrella Academy, you could never let Reginald Hargreeves figure out what you loved lest he use it against you. There was safety in aloof indifference, more than could be found anywhere else under their roof.

Five times Five Hargreeves protected his siblings the best ways he could, and the one time he failed.

☁︎ Lethe by shoelaces { T / WIP }

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Le·the | A river in Hades whose waters cause drinkers to forget their past.

Or: Five loses his memories instead of Vanya, and it falls to his siblings to raise a superpowered teenager in the 1960s, all whilst preserving their own new lives and preventing yet another apocalypse.

☁︎ Like an abyss by fridayyy { T }

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For the second time, Five has to (gets to?) grow up.

☁︎ Like Oxygen by sevansa { T }

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Klaus's powers may be a bit more extensive than just seeing the dead, he's not sure what to do about that.

OR

The one where Klaus's power is not ghosts, but souls and that makes a hell of a difference.

☁︎ Mellow Rays of a Departing Sun [Series] by Emotionally_Detached (Yeah_Toast) { T }

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He makes it. He time travels and makes it through another apocalypse. He makes it, but his siblings don't.

His siblings don't make it, except he's in his own childhood and they're still here, alive and thirteen and he can fix things.

He will fix things

☁︎ most dangerous place in the world, the [Series] by Princess_Sarcastia { T }

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"Grace is the third model in a series created by and for Sir Reginald.  She has access to the knowledge obtained by her predecessors in their time assisting Sir Reginald in his many endeavors.

All three of them were primarily designed as protectors.  Do no harm, just as Mr. Asimov said!

But Grace is slightly different."

[priority one: protect the children]

☁︎ New Life, A by BirdInTheCave { T }

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Allison had convinced Ray to come back to 2019 with her and her family and after a month of being cooped up in the house with the other Hargreeves plus their own unconventional guests, Ray suggests they spend some time alone. He's still struggling to fully comprehend the new world he's stepped into but he's determined that with Allison at his side he can get used to anything. Allison can't find a reason to say no. She should have said no.

Luckily for her, Five will always be there for his family, now that he's back.

☁︎ Not with me by ClaraCivry (Kat_Of_Dresden) { T }

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They never asked if any of that blood was his. Five is bleeding, and he is also giving up.

AU to 2X07, with hurt Five because after all that boy has been through...

☁︎ Number Five | And The Things that Make Him Tick [Series] by Kraeyola { T }

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It's only been two weeks for him.

AKA: Five succumbs to two weeks worth of badly cared for (physical and emotional) injuries, and ends up extremely feverish.

☁︎ On My Terms by CivilBores { T }

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“I did what you asked,” he tells her. “Now, the briefcase.”

Her eyebrows raise in mock-surprise, red lips curling up her face in a sadistic smile.

“You didn’t think that was all, did you?” she asks.

AU: The Handler gives Five a slightly different deal.

☁︎ Partners, Parents, or None of the Above by DarkFairytale { T }

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Kenny's mom assuming that Diego and Klaus were A) a couple and B) Number Five’s parents was both bemusing and amusing at the time. But that was because it was the only time it had ever happened. Now though? Now they just can't understand why these misunderstandings keep happening.

☁︎ rude awakening by Soulykins { T / WIP }

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When Five wakes up, he just knows someone is in the room with him. Of course, even he didn't except to come face to face with the Handler who he'd thought to be very very dead. And he especially didn't expect her to break into his room and watch him sleep while waiting for him to wake up.

It's very fortunate that Diego and Klaus show up to wake him up and take offense to some random lady in the same room as their very uncomfortable, very thirteen-year-old brother.

☁︎ Screaming in the Face of Communication by papayaromantic { T }

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It's not that he doesn't want to pay attention to Five, just that he seriously can't hear what the boy is saying past the wailing of the torn apart woman in front of him.

☁︎ shaking like I shook before by Anonymous { T }

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Five tries to deal with it alone, until he learns that he doesn’t have to.

☁︎ skirts and sweaters by slightlyworriedhuman { T }

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"I don't want to be a ‘cute little schoolboy’ anymore, alright?” Five snapped. For some reason, the thought of himself as a schoolboy was enough to make his skin prickle. Was it the implication that he was younger than the rest of them, less mature despite his life?

...Yeah, it was definitely that. Absolutely.Five wants a change in wardrobe. His siblings are more than happy to help.

☁︎ small changes by calypso42 { T }

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“I need to ask you something.” He set down the large stack of books he was carrying beside him. Klaus glanced at a few of the titles - Consciousness in the Brain - Memory & the Role of the Hippocampus - Soul vs. Matter: A Comprehensive Look at the Origins of Sentience - and grimaced.

“Are you… having an existential crisis, or something? Because I am possibly the worst person you could go to for that.”

...

When Five goes to Klaus to ask him something about his powers, Klaus doesn’t think much of it. At least, until he realizes that what he thought was simple curiosity was actually deeper than that, leading to a revelation about Five himself.

☁︎ take shelter by aloneintherain { T }

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AU where the apocalypse doesn’t follow the Hargreeves to the 1960s. Without the threat of nuclear annihilation hanging over their heads, the siblings can take the time to be a family again.

Until they find out that the Handler has been blackmailing Five.

☁︎ this is a bad town (for such a pretty face) by luciimariiellii { T }

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Five’s gone. (How the Hargreeves cope, and how they reunite.)

☁︎ to unexplain the unforgivable by darkviverna { T }

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Ability to see the dead and having a temporal assassin for a brother don’t mix well.

☁︎ Too Much Too Little by 1spideyson { T }

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Five says nothing on the ride back, just gently presses the tips of thin fingers to his eyes and temples like his head is a new instrument he’s learning to play. Like he’s searching for the right notes.

Diego tries not to cast too many worried glances the boy’s way, but when Five crawls into Diego’s bed, shaking and grey, he can’t stop himself from speaking up.

A look at Five and Diego's relationship through a h/c lens.

☁︎ Too Old To Be So Young by KaseyBeth { T }

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Five winced loudly, pushing his head off the floor to see bright red smeared across his chest and stomach; crimson soaked into his shorts, running down his leg. His head fell back against the ground dizzyingly, and he groaned as someone touched the wound, biting his bottom lip as he tried to stay conscious. The end of life, of everything, was in three days; they didn’t have time for this, he didn’t have time for this. A bullet wound, a stupid bullet wound and all that stupid concern and worry, was just going to slow them down. There wasn’t time for mistakes, or hiccups, or rest and recovery. It was the end of the fucking world.

☁︎ traumaversary by WeWalkADifferentPath { T }

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It follows him like an unscratched itch. Under his skin, over his body, around his energy, like a mosquito that won’t leave him the fuck alone.

April 1st. April 1st. April 1st.

(A character study of Five, with some inevitable family feels, in honour of March 24th).

☁︎ Unexpected Future, An by aseies { T / WIP }

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“I’m sure you’re looking forward to finding a way back to your own time as soon as possible,” Nedzu said. “I want you to know that U.A. will do everything in its power to help you achieve that goal. Time travel is a complicated equation to solve, but I’m sure if we put our heads together we’ll come up with something!”

Five raised a skeptical eyebrow. “And you’re just going to do that out of the goodness of your heart? I’m not even old enough for high school yet.”

“Well, we’re all heroes for a reason, no? What good are we if we can’t help a single child in need?” Nedzu pointed out with a pleasantly neutral smile as he sipped his tea.

OR: Instead of time traveling into the apocalypse, thirteen-year-old Five Hargreeves teleports in the middle of the USJ fight.

He gets a couple of new dads out of it.

☁︎ walls kept tumbling down, the by Ingu { T }

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It started small.

There was a nagging ache in his chest, phantom pain from where the bullets had pierced his flesh, in the overwritten timeline that never will be.

(the one where rewinding time doesn't miraculously resolve mortal gunshot wounds)

☁︎ We All Deserve Second Chances (but don't repeat your mistakes) by justarandomword, wolvesandnovas { T }

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Time-travelling gave Ben a second chance at life. He's not about to let Reginald Hargreeves ruin that for him and Klaus.

(a.k.a. Reginald takes Klaus' dog tags and the aftermath.)

☁︎ we didn't choose this life, we're just (kind of) living it [Series] by noodlerdoodler { T / Partially WIP }

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Five couldn’t move, standing by and watching complacently, as his younger brother grabbed him roughly by the front of his sweater. It was like he was watching a play he wasn't apart of, yet that was definitely his small body being tossed over the balcony. No doubt, Luther thought that he would just jump out of the way. He'd always jumped out of the way, sometimes without even meaning to, but now visions of a world on fire flashed through his head as his body plummeted towards the ground. Seemingly, he was tumbling through the air in slow motion and absentmindedly, Five wondered if this was his life flashing before his eyes. All he saw was the desolate world he’d left behind weeks ago.

When Five hit the ground, it was with a sickening cracking noise.

���Oh my god, Luther, what have you done?”

☁︎ with two arms by karcheri { T }

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What it comes down to, really, is that Five had been too eager for results. Once it became clear to him that there was a connection between his powers and his energy level the obvious course of action, as he saw it, was to test this information. The hypothesis was this: higher energy levels = stronger powers and the easiest way to get more energy is to eat more. Pretty simple stuff. Too simple.

or Five times that Five starves himself and one time that he gets called out on it.

☁︎ you from yesterday by questors (sieges) { T }

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The difference between who his siblings once were and who they are now.

[thetv-junkie]

Keeping Track of Fanfics (99 % Offline) and How to Organise Them Neatly

Without a doubt, fanfiction has become an undeniably popular phenomenon in modern pop-culture. Every day thousands of avid writers provide us with their entertaining adventures, allowing us to interact with like-minded fans and friends and secretly indulge in collective swooning. ヽ( ⌒o⌒)人(⌒-⌒ )ﾉ

But then again, the sheer abundance of stories makes it hard to not be confused at times. Have I read that fic before? Did I like it??? Had there been an update that I might have missed? Where the heck did I stop reading? Damn, that story has been deleted; I wished I had saved it! ( ಥ ʖ̯ ಥ)

Especially in devastating times as this, with the corona virus running rampant on the whole globe, forcing millions of people into quarantine at home, the fear of the internet collapsing is palpable everywhere. In China, readers didn't/still do have no access to archiveofourown.com anymore.  (o_O) !

But fear not, here's a great solution for the problem. – The FREE offline programme "Calibre". Some of you might have heard of it already and shy away from its usage as it seems confusing and cumbersome at first glance. (•ิ_•ิ) ?

In this tutorial, however, I will show you that, once you've gotten through the necessary set-up (which I will guide you through step-by-step) it will be well worth the effort and you're going to love “Calibre” forever for saving your fanfiction treasures and allows you your daily fix of smutty goodness, even if being online is no longer an option.  (๑˃ᴗ˂)

So, here we go:

First, you need to download "Calibre" (either the regular or portable version):

https://calibre-ebook.com/download

and install it.

ヘ(￣ω￣ヘ)

Follow the instruction and select your device (output format is usually .epub but than can be changed to pretty much every other common format.) and click on “Finish”. If you’re not sure which device you use (or use more than one), simply stick to “Generic”.

An interface will appear:

You need to click on the three dots on the right (see arrow). An additional row of plugins will open which holds the button “Preferences”. Click that.

Scroll down to “Advanced” and select “Plugins”, “Get New Plugins”.

In the list of new plugins chose “FanFicFare” and install it (Ignore the warning.). As for the toolbars - best go with the pre-sets.

You can pick as many plugins as you like; “EpubMerge”, “Find Duplicates” and “EpubSplit” are useful additions, but see for yourself. Whenever “Calibre” asks you to close and re-open the program, do so (might happen a couple of times).

Next, go back to “Preferences” (remember the three dots on the right of the toolbar), find “Toolbars and Menus” and choose the main toolbar.

You can now pick the buttons you want to show up in your main toolbar, then click “Apply”. My toolbar looks something like this:

If you can't see all of your plugins, click on the three dots on the right, just as before. An additional row of plugins appears underneath.

Now we’re going to add the columns that are individually important to you and which will give you the information you need in order to pick the right book for your reading session.

Go to “Preferences”, “Add your columns”.

First tick and un-tick the pre-set columns that you want to keep or get rid of.

__φ(。。)

Then, click the green “+”-button on the right. An new window pops up that allows you to create new categories. Here's an example:

In my case I've picked a column that can be answered with a yes/no, but of course you also could opt for a text version instead (which is helpful when you want to sort stuff by pairing). Just make sure the lookup name is written in small letters (otherwise you'll get an error message) while for the column name you can write whatever you wish. When you're done, click "Apply".

Repeat the process as often as desired, here's my columns to give you some ideas:

ID

(like 008, so I can give individual IDs to my books which makes finding them easier.)

Title               

(No big brainer here – once you download a fanfic, this will be filled in automatically.)

Read? 

(Again, pretty self-explanatory, easy to answer with the yes/no option)

Rating               

(Now that is probably the most important column since it gives me an idea whether that fic is worth a re-read, or not. You can chose the ★★★★★-rating system in your personalised columns)

Time                    

(This column is only necessary if you know if you're a fast reader or not. We only need this column if you intend to add “Pages” as well:)

Pages                  

(That feature comes in handy when you're reading on another device like your mobile phone or tablet. Some devices show either the number of pages or the estimated reading time. In case it shows only the number of pages (just for example's sake, let's pretend you need one minute for reading one page which leaves you with e. g. 900 pages. Go to this site to break it down to hours and minutes:

https://www.unitjuggler.com/convert-time-from-min-to-h.html

900 minutes/pages leaves you with a total of roughly 15hr of reading time. You might want to note that down in your Calibre columns in order to have a vague idea if you're in for a lazy half-an-hour-read or better get settled for a marathon.)

Pairing?              

(Does what it says on the tin – If you have more than one fav pairing in the same fandom it is useful to be able to sort by pairing for easy selection when you're in the mood for certain protagonists without wanting to scroll through your library forever. Btw, I recommend to use different libraries for each fandom. (Click the arrow on the right of the button "Calibre Library", "Switch/Create Library" and follow the instructions)

NSFW?              

(Personally, a really important column for me. 'nough said. (^_<)〜☆ )

Okay, so now that we got the most important stuff done, let's finally download a fanfic!!! Leave Calibre as it is, open the internet and go to your site and fic of choice. Select the according url in your browser, copy it, switch back to Calibre.

Click on the arrow button on the right side of your plug in fanficfare, "Download from URL", the download url is automatically added, then press OK.

Now one of these two things can happen:

If you're lucky, on your bottom right corner, there's a pop up, letting you know that your FanficFare download is complete. All you have to do is press "Yes" and ét voila – you've imported your first fanfic!

All you need to do now is to double click on the title and start reading (I recommend to use E-book viewer). Enjoy !

However, if you're not lucky, you might get messages like how the sites want you to enter your username and password or that it's adult content blah blah blah, yadda, yadda, yadda. Having to fill in the information for every single fanfic is annoying, time-consuming and, most of all, incredibly annoying!

凸(￣ヘ￣)

Hence, here's the work-around:

Click on the arrow right to your plugin "FanFicFare" in the tool bar, find “Configure FanfFicFare”.

Go to the tab that says "personal.ini", then "edit personal.ini" Scroll down in the small pop-up until you can see this pre-set:

Edit in all the sites you're usually browsing for fanfiction. Always make sure that the letters of the sitename are blue, not red. If you want to make sure you aren't bothered with any verification pop-ups and such, double-check to work all of these in:

[Your fanfiction page like hp.adultfanfiction.org]

#username:YourPenname

#password:YourPassword

## default is false

#collect_series: true

#is_adult:true

#fail_on_password: false

That should do the trick and you can now easily keep track and enjoy your fics!

☆*:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:*☆

Bonus:

When you're done reading you might want to fill in some information for later use.

For that, fill your columns on the main screen by simply double-clicking on each category. So far, so good. But we need more metadata.

Choose a fic so it’s highlighted in blue. Then go to "Edit Metadata" in the main tool bar.

A window opens:

Some information will be pre-filled but you can always edit them. Also, I highly recommend you to change the tags to your liking, same as you can add a book cover of your choice via the browse function.

On a final note: When you're following a fic that is still in-progress, you can simply click the button "FanFicFare" (NOT the arrow next to it!) to update it.

♡( ◡‿◡ ) ENJOY YOUR READ!