#if you know one tell them to hmu if theyre interested in saying

[toothfairyofficial]

do you guys ever get emotional about the fact that someone (a character) is Out There, Somewhere. like it's ok that i don't even know them but it makes me happy to think about the fact that this person's in the same reality as me (again, in this case). Like whether in a kintype situation or a fictive or some combination or whatever. They're Out There and i hope to god happy. maybe they even have friends from the same source and they found each other again. Shout out to You for existing wherever you are

[aquariusshadow]

Live!Blogging Legacies s3x11

Helloooooooo friends, how’s our methan legacies deprivation going? Two weeks....two weeks...but it's time for another Legacies Live!Blog! Ngl I did miss doing these ahaha

--

well then we got some old timey shit going on here, im into it

is this clarke

this better be clarke

i better be remembering properly

that looks like an ascendant

HAH I WAS RIGHT IM NOT AN IDIOT

hi clarke

yep ascendant...artifact...whatever

damn, 4hrs of sleep (maybe) and im doin good with the brain thing

awww look at hope reassuring cleo

this is sweet

"just be natural" stares intensely

Jed no

do not introduce time travel in this

kaleb to cleo: a special someone

me: .....hope? (excuse my cleope heart)

landon would be a great history major

Kai parker???

did hope just say kai

i really like how theyre writing handon

METHAN

BBIES

I MISSED YOU

"i was worried our days of superhero teamwork would be over"

gdi lizzie

platonic!mizzie only plz

ethan come back

really thats all we're gonna see of josie/hope/landon interaction one look

wade!!!! hiiiiiiii where tf have you been

i can see josie larping actually

"im not here to bust up your bromance" ahaha

im really impressed finch stayed by herself with this werewolf secret for so long

ok lizzie calm down

like a majority of werewolf first-tunes are almost always accidental

OH MY GOD LANDON

HIS NECROMANCER MIMICKRY IS ON POINT

i love him ahahahaha

this is amazing

i love him

look at how he's making her laugh

this is so fucking cute

this is what i wanted with handon oh my gooooood

rip necromancer i guess

one of the few reasons why i enjoyed his character was he played gideon in season 3 of reign

any reign fans reading this hmu (seriously hmu lmao)

oh god wtf is that

ew dont eat the

ok

fine

be disgusting idc

oooooooo is this how dark!josie comes back

yep

ok thats clever

josies confronting her inner demons head on

i like this

"head-dive" it has a name now

jesus finch

you really dont know the whole story

oooo kaylee heightened dark!josies voice a little bit

i like that

im getting some katherine pierce vibes??? at least with her mannerisms

maaaaaaan i like how theyre showing us finch's backstory

"we"

sigh im really not surprised she yeeted him back into reality

but at least he can help heal her???

landon and josie interaction to save hope??? yes plz

oh god this isnt gonna go well with ethan going alone is it

lizzie

good lord

idk this is a bit much for her

i get shes trying to look out for josie

but yikes

"special candies"

awwwwww poor finch

this poor girl

my headcanon is that josies gonna become a badass DnD player after this episode

awww kaleb's attempt at flirting is pretty adorable

aka be yourself kaleb thats all

i really am getting katherine v elena vibes with josie and dark!josie (i really hope thats not an insult to katherine lmao)

wade you sweet simple fool you tried

so josie ended up taking her magic back to save hope...imma just leave it at that

cmon wade

be the fairy guardian you were meant to

oh ok

yeaaaaaaaa landon save your girl!!!

awwwwwwww

finally saw landon saving hope

such handon progression im so happy

awwww kaleb wanted to protect cleo

thats really sweet

idk why im not as into these two as a couple compared to some of the other ships BUT i am liking them more as the episodes go by!

handon communication! handon communication!

hope's starting to trust him yaaaaaay

hope's playing dnd

yessssssss

never thought i'd say this but handon is starting to reach couple goals for me

hey mg...ethan kinda...went off by himself...

so, lizzie supports the methaness going on

thats all im taking away from this scene

this is what i mean when i say i like platonic!mizzie

mg is so sweeeeeeeeeet i love him

WHO TF HURT ETHAN

WHO DO I GOTTA HURT BACK

hosie convo! i repeat hosie convo! finally

man i really want josie to go play dnd

no........nooooooooo dont tell me landon isnt landon

see heres my thing

if the landon we've been seeing this entire time wasnt landon

then all that handon development we finally got

asjdfahlsdfjaskldfasdkf

that being said i do find this incredibly interesting

--

I swear these episodes are just higher in quality! So, if Landon isn’t Landon, then what does that mean for all the positive Handon progression the past few episodes since Landon’s been back? Also, Methan how I’ve missed you.

[ugbobae]

IM BO BAE  🡢 bobby

reintroducing my muse, im bobae. goes by bo, bobby, bae for the most part but appreciates any and all potential nicknames or puns made on and WILL steal them to use on merch. probably wants to open a streetwear brand on her own someday but that shit’s expensive. the girl is a hustler, grew up broke and is not about to go back to that so catch her putting food on the t a b l e and if you wanna call her out for selling out, well, be her guest. not that it won’t bother her, no she’ll be pissy and sad about it for sure. she’ll also vandalize your property if the situation presents itself. ya girl is a walking misdemeanor. she’s a rising star which means hongdae is turning it’s back on her, something she has extremely complicated feelings about.

her primary genre is electropop and she pulls heavy influence in sound from artists like yelle, yeseo, yaeji, neon bunny, iu (selectively) and others. i’ve got a playlist if you’re interested 6v6. basically i want all the drama and angst and all the possible heartwrenching bs so hmu!

we went to elementary/ middle school /kindergarten together on the wrong side of seoul and played latchkey kid mischief together while our dads finished lengthy factory shifts, we were basically family but life separated us for xyz reasons, now we’re chillin again in hongdae and its kind of weird but nice and nostalgic

we’ve mutually admired each other’s music for awhile now and are finally getting a chance to work together, but there’s a real possibility of backlash for either / both of us due to current rumormongering around bobby’s career so maybe you want to back out or maybe its kind of strained

we came up together in the scene before bo was ‘bobby’ and we were mad close. but, when bobae transitioned to a more electronica type of sound it became kind of strained, because you felt she lost her roots and in general both grew up a lot since then. so there’s some kind of spark or familiarity or wistful connection there but now they’re left feeling at odds trying to chase a lost friendship when our paths have diverged so much

a frequent dalliance, bobby doesn’t exactly NOT sleep around but she’s not a one night stand kind of girl either. she makes big promises and doesn’t follow through, so you can be guaranteed up to one to two months of fun fun fun and then its intermittently reappearing in your life every few weeks like nothing happened. out of sight out of mind?

ride or die besties, soul bonded, tell you everything, the one person that bobae actually doesn’t ghost out on unintentionally. literally she’d kill someone if you even seemed like you wanted it. maybe you’re exhausted by her though, she’s a lot. hopefully someone who is a slight foil to her, someone more solid to weigh down her flighty kite string.

literally just the messiest mess of obsession and love and just being completely over the top about each other, in destructive ways. like just fully a big mess of nonsense and back and forth and all the drama and theyre both just way in too deep and also fully hung up on their own issues and its visceral and brutal and soft and terrible and wonderful.

i’d also love any kind of obnoxious antagonism for the sake of fun, so feel free to throw that at me. those reasons tend to be more interesting if theyre predicated on existing stuff tho so no premade there!

SOUL CRUSHING ANGST FIRST LOVE EX. details tbd based on plotting i just love misery

spontaneous little bits and bobs

we always run into each other at the bus stop going to jog by the han and after awhile i finally came up to you to say hey and now we’re running buddies and its a nice safe space away from the judgement she usually gets but then oops she sees u around the scene and realizes where she knows you from finally and now its not the same

i heard you shit talking me when you didnt know i was around and then you caught me trying to vandalize your motorcycle / some other petty crime lol

i sang guide for one of your tracks and then you heard one of my new songs being shopped around and now we’ve become creative partners that play off each other’s ideas to develop one another, and maybe we’re mutual muses for each other n its just a great creative friendship full of mutual improvement

you caught me making questionable and likely dangerous choices when fully drunk and either went along with me and now we’re tight as fuck or dragged me back to safety and now we’re tight but also in the way where you resent ‘babysitting’ a fool when trashed

substance abuse friends enabling poor decisions idk

people who resent her for the choices she’s made for her career would be interesting too

[ofniko]

troye sivan. demiboy. he/them. ／ nicolas “niko” goldwater just pulled up blasting coming of age by foster the people— that song is so them! you know, for a twenty-one year old social media influencer/fashion guru, i’ve heard they’re really -mercurial, but that they make up for it by being so +gregarious. if i had to choose three things to describe them, i’d probably say a shiny pink vinyl skirt with pristine nails to match, designer shopping bags weighing down twiggy arms, and margaritas with extra sugar around the rim. here’s to hoping they don’t cause too much trouble!

hello friends ! i’m lainie, she/her, cst, and i talk about stephen king too much :/ im!! so excited to introduce u to niko my fashion baby and to get to know all of ur amazing outstanding totally unique never been done before muses !! under the cut u can find a very lazy intro with some summarized points and i’d promise a real bio later but lich rally who am i kidding lmao anyway i have a p full day but ill be around for plotting n stuff so come smash a heart and ill slide up in ur dms or hmu in my ims or on discord (starslut#0877) whichever works best for you MWAH

background/history

niko grew up right here on the upper east side, born and bred into the life of new york’s elite and while his attitude doesn’t entirely reflect the sort of pretentiousness we get when we think gossip girl, he definitely exudes an air of wealth and privilege and of having a limited view of what the world is really like outside of his trust fund bubble

for all his ostentation and lack of control when it comes to the wealth at his fingertips, he’s always maintained a very genuine humbleness and sense of humility that, while not always strong, is definitely there. it can be seen in his passion for helping people through what he does--his greatest thrill in life is to know he’s helped people find themselves through fashion and self care

his dad is a wall street trader and entrepreneur and they’re new(ish) money. he got wealthy very young so niko grew up knowing nothing but a life of luxury. his mom is a socialite, and his relationship with them is about what you’d expect. they love him, he’s their child, but they don’t take a huge amount of interest in his life. their blasé attitude toward him was highlighted most in his mind when he came out to them at 15 and they just......didn’t really have a reaction. weren’t upset, weren’t really surprised, but weren’t necessarily proud or happy for him either

when he came out a couple years later to them as non-binary it wasn’t much different, only in that they didn’t really get what he was saying whereas “gay” was something they could understand

he did two years of school at nyu and dropped out because he simply wasn’t enjoying it and was making enough money through instagram and youtube and brand promotions that it felt like a no-brainer decision

again, his parents weren’t happy about it, but they didn’t fight him over it, either

his following is growing exponentially and he’s just released a line of scents and perfumes that, on top of the revenue from everything else, makes it so he hardly needs his trust fund anymore

personality

gregarious and extraverted sometimes to a fault, niko can easily get on the nerves of people who don’t have the energy to keep up. he’s like a child who never quite grew out of adolescence, and with that boundless energy also comes a selfishness he’s usually unaware of. it can be very difficult for niko to be conscious of the way his actions affect other people and ends up hurting those close to him that way

in that same vein, when he does realize what he’s done, he’s more often than not consumed with guilt over it and will go to great lengths to try and resolve the issue

not that he always does a good job

he sleeps around a lot mostly because he enjoys it, but partly because he doesn’t know how to have a relationship. the lingering adolescence makes it so he doesn’t have the necessary awareness of another person’s needs to be in a stable relationship and he manages to a large degree to convince himself he doesn’t care and prefers being single anyway

fashion is his favorite thing in the world and though he doesn’t wear a lot of makeup on the daily, he definitely dabbles and has a lot of fun experimenting

catch him exploring the city and taking pictures, partying, clubbing, brunching, and shopping on the regs and if he’s in a Mood, you can usually tell bc he goes on shopping binges and fusses to an extreme degree over his appearance

also he he dyes his hair platinum blond

and his pronouns are flexible! he usually uses he/him referring to himself but genuinely doesn’t care whatever people feel like using

connection ideas

gal and gay pals :’) for fashion and shopping and instagram photoshoots

also a best friend ride or die pleaSE and thank u

i need enemies and angst and drama so give me everyone who hates niko/thinks he’s a fake bitch/can’t stand him

high school connections are cute so maybe someone he didn’t get along w back then and does now/vice versa where they were rly close and something turned them against each other and now it’s world war 3

COLLABS ?? youtubers/influencers/instagrammers he’s worked with or regularly collaborates with

a parental figure/figures :( since he doesn’t have much of a relationship w his real parents

umm!!!! someone who like they DONT get along usually and everyone knows they’re weird frenemies but they VIBE SO HARD when theyre drunk and partying

one (1) ex who lasted maybe like 3-4 months and it didn’t work out either bc they cheated on niko (would love this angst) OR bc niko was too flaky for them and they couldn’t handle the way niko doesn’t rly understand intimacy

someone who can challenge!! that!! and it’s freaking niko out bc he’s starting to catch Feels but doesn’t know what to do w it/doesn’t know if they feel the same way

casual hookups/one night stands/maybe a hookup or two from back in high school and they’re either on good terms and just friends now or like....it’s angsty maybe!!!!!!!!!

[tired-wolfe]

#Fuck_Buckets

A memo board on Pesterchum I was invited to. It was a lot of fun.  I was Kankri, as hashtagWarrior. Which is who I am always on pesterchum, so feel free to hmu if you want to roleplay or chat. 

CHW RIGHT NOW opened memo on board FUCK BUCKETS. CURRENT terminallyCapricious [CTC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CTC: SpIlL CTC: Or ElSe CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CAC: :33 < thats the secret mew didnt wanna tell me earlipur? CCG banned CEB from responding to memo: [STOP.]. CAC: :33 < hehehehehehehehehehehe CCG banned CAC from responding to memo: [STOP!]. CAC ceased responding to memo. CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CCG: OH LOOK, KANKRI IS FINALLY HERE. CCG: HEY KANKRI. CHW: I was spending s9me quality 6u66le time with the 9thers, as in I was misera6le with the 9thers. Hell9, Karkat, and friends. CHW: # S9rry f9r my tardiness CCG: ALL GOOD. YOU ARRIVED JUST IN TIME. CURRENT twiinArmageddons [CTA] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CTA: oh jeez. CCG: AND BY JUST IN TIME I MEAN RIGHT AS THE CHAOS IS BEGINNING TO SETTLE DOWN A LITTLE. CCG: YOU'RE LUCKY TO BE LATE. CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CAC: :33 < mewr so mean CCG: HUSH. CAC: :33 < it made my whole trollian shut down -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  frowns -- CHW: I see, I guess it pays 9ff t9 spend time with y9ur friends then. CCG: I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS GOING TO DO THAT. CAC: :33 < sure mew didnt karkitty CAC: :33 < also kankri? CHW: Yes? CAC: :33 < i didnt know if that was mew fur sure but hi! CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CEB: i'm back from sipping my water to say, rude. CCG: OKAY, HOLD ON A SEC. CCG: OH WOW. CCG: DON'T SIP YOUR WATER AT ME. CHW: Yes hell9 (:6 CCG: MY THREAT TO SPIT IN IT STILL STANDS. CCG: HOLD ON I NEED TO CHECK SOMETHING. -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  sips water vigourously -- CHW: D9 n9t spit in 9ther pe9ples drinks, Karkat, it is rude. # Rude -- CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB]  also does that. -- CCG: YOU'RE RUDE. CHW: H9w am I rude? I try really hard t9 6e sensitive 9f 9thers needs. CCG: BULLSHIT. CURRENT adiosToreador [CAT] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CAT: i AGREE WITH kANKRI, CAT: tHAT WAS PRETTY RUDE, CCG: NO ONE ASKED YOU. GO SHOVE YOUR OPINION UP YOUR ASS AND KEEP IT THERE. CAC: :33 < i think we all do tavpuros CAT: oH,, CCG: INSTANT REGRET. CCG: SORRY TAVROS. CCG: YOU'RE GREAT. CTT ceased responding to memo. CHW: Karkat, I think y9u need t9 have a 6it 9f a time 9ut. G9 sit in a c9rner and think a69ut y9ur acti9ns. CCG: WHAT? CCG: HOLY SHIT. CAT: oH, CAT: tHANKS? CTA: oh 2hiit. CCG: I'M GONNA GO INTO CARDIAC ARREST. CCG: YOU'RE NOT MY DAD. -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  goes over and hugs tavros -- CAT: yOUVE NEVER SAID ANYTHING NICE TO ME BEFORE, CAT: aWW, CTC: MoThErFuCKiNg TimE OuT LikE A ChIlD CHW: I am y9ur dancester and as such, I am y9ur elder, thus, g9 sit in a c9rner. CTA: KK ju2t got put iintwo tiime out, thii2 ii2 fuckiing awe2ome. CCG: MAKE ME. CTC: WhO CAnT HAvE NuMbErS CHW: #will 6e y9ur lusus if I have t9 6e CHW: #d9 i s9und like p9rrim? CHW: #9h n9 -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  grabs Karkat by the ear and drags him to a corner -- CHW: Sit d9wn and stay CCG: I'M LAUGHIGNGFJIHORE -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  is loving this -- CCG: WHAT THE FUCK CURRENT tipsyGnostalgic [CTG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CTG: hahaha CHW: C:6 CURRENT gardenGnostic104 [CGG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CGG: sorry, guys, but i have to go CTG: shouty got put in time out CAC: :33 < awh bye jade! -- CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB]  even more aggressive water sipping. -- CEB: perfect. CEB: later jade! CGG: bye! -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  walks out of the fucking corner and takes John's water. -- CGG ceased responding to memo. CCG: FUCK ALL OF YOU. CHW: If y9u'd st9p 6eing rude, y9u c9uld leave time 9ut. CCG: I AM LEAVING TIME OUT. CAC: :33 < he might be there fur a while CHW: Y9u'd 6etter 6ehave. CCG: YOU CAN'T MAKE ME. CTA: he never doe2 that. CHW: I will literally sit 9n y9u CCG: OH WOW, I'M QUAKING AT THAT THREAT. CCG: SCAAAARY. CAC: :33 < 'quaking' CCG: DON'T. CAT: sIT ON HIM! -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  snorts -- CTA: 2hook. CCG: FEAR. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  pushes Karkat down and sits on him, sipping tea -- CCG: JOHN? HELP. CCG: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CHW: C;6 CCG: WH CAC: :33 < hes not gonna help mew CHW: I'm a g99d dancest9r CEB: i'm sorry i can't help, i'm dehydrated because you took my water. -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  smacks Kankri in the back of the head. Bonk! -- -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  glares and flicks Karkats nose -- CHW: D9 n9t test me CCG: I'LL BITE YOU. CCG: OH I'M TESTING YOU. I'M ABSOLUTELY QUIZZING YOU. CCG: GET OFF. CHW: We will have a full 9n Vantas against Vantas fight, I pr9mise. CHW: N9. 6ehave and Ill c9nsider it CAT: aAAHH! a SPIDER! CCG: HEYYY KANKRI? CAT: i GOTTA GO, CCG: ARE YOU TICKLIS- CAT ceased responding to memo. CCG: HOLY FUCK WHAT CCG: IS TAVROS OK? CHW: 6ye Tavr9s CEB: another one? CHW: I am n9t ticklish. CCG: ANYWAYS, KANKRI. ARE YOU TICKLISH? CEB: where are they all coming from. CCG: GOD DAMN IT. CHW: N9t at all. CHW: N9pe CHW: # D9nt y9u dare CCG: HM. -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  reaches towards Kankri. -- CAC: :33 < ahhh CHW: Y9u will make me 6reak s9 many 9f my 9wn rules if y9u keep this- N9  N9 N9! -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  tickles that little weirdo. -- -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  Tries t9 gra6 y9ur hands t9 st9p -- -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  starts laughing and squriming trying to stop you -- CHW: PLEASE G9D N9 ST9P ST9P! CAC: :33 < this is inpurresting CEB: i feel like i need popcorn. -- CURRENT tipsyGnostalgic [CTG]  casually sips a martini -- -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  continues tickling him until, eventually, Kankri ends up on the ground, and Karkat is a free man no longer being sat on. -- CCG: THIS IS YOUR FAULT. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  is a panting wheezing heap on the floor, curled around himself -- CHW: H9w dare y9u CHW: #Seri9usly -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  flips him off. -- CHW: Y9u have n9 respect f9r pers9nal space CCG: NEITHER DO YOU! CHW: # What are y9u, an Amp9ra CCG: YOU WERE LITERALLY *SITTING ON M- CCG: ... CCG: EXCUSE ME? CHW: 6ecause y9u were mis6ehaving and as y9ur elder its my j96 t9 c9rrect y9u CTA: wow, that wa2 har2h, even by my 2tandard2. CAC: :33 < i smell another ship CCG: HUH? CCG: WHAT SHIP? -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  was shocked he wasn't banned for that one )xB -- CAC: :33 < not mew CTA: what me? CAC: :33 < no! CTG: 5epeta CTG: *neeta CTG: **nepeta CHW: What is the new ship, Nepeta? CTC: WhO CAC: :33 < a shipper nevfur reveals pur secrets CTG: vantascest is going a bit too far CAC: :33 < its not vantacest CCG: I CCG: I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE ANYMORE. CTG: thats gkood CTG: *jood CTG: **good CAC: :33 < it has nothing to do with karkitty CCG: I'M SERIOUSLY NOT TRYING TO TAKE A SWING AT MY DANCESTOR, ROXY, THANKS. CCG: HORRIFYING. CCG: EVERYONE HERE IS TERRIBLE. CHW: I really am curi9us 9n wh9 it is y9u are refering t99.. I h9nestly have n9 interest in quadrants. CHW: #Except, may6e.. CAC: :33 < it was the comment kankri made on a fishy ill say that much CHW: 9h- 9h 9H CAC: :33 < hehehe CHW: N9 N9 N9 N9N9N9N9N9N9N9N9 CHW: D9 N9T CHW: SHIP ME CHW: WITH HIM CEB: i don't even know all that quadrant stuff... CAC: :33 < already have b33n! -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  flames in eyes  -- CCG: YEAH, SERIOUSLY, DON'T. CCG: CRONUS IS A DICK. CTG: t:3t CHW: CR9NUS IS AN INSECURE PERVERT CAC: :33 < theyre purrfect though~ CTA: what an iin2ult, 2hiippiing wiith an ampora. CHW: HE HAS A6S9LUTELY N9 RESPECT F9R ANYTHING 9THER THAN HIMSELF CCG: KANKRI DESERVES BETTER THAN SOMEONE LIKE CRONUS, STEP OFF. CAC: :33 < oh sollux i got one fur mew too CCG: YOU DON'T WANT TO GET INTO A DISAGREEMENT WITH TWO WHOLE VANTASES, DO YOU? CTA: plea2e dont. CAC: :33 < no but its just my opinion CCG: YOUR OPINION ISN'T VALID ANYMORE. CHW: Cr9nus is, 6y far, a l9ng stretch. I w9uld have preferred just a69ut any 9ther ship c9nsidering me and my friends. CTA: your opiiniion ii2 wrong. CAC: :33 < but i do find it funny mew got all defensive CCG: SOLLUX. CHW: Wh9 W9ULDNT get defensive?? CCG: SAVE ME. CTA: KK. CAC: :33 < sure CTA: what do you want me two do, kiill you? not much ii can do, al2o beiing 2tuck iin thii2 2iituatiion. CCG: JOHN. CCG: SAVE ME. CEB: mmmmmaybe. CCG: PLEASE. CHW: He is disrespectful, never listens t9 me when I try t9 tell him things, always t9uching with9ut asking, 9r given permissi9n, hes just, 9ver all a really gr9ss guy. And thats saying s9mething c9nsidering I w9uld have c9nsidered any9ne else 6ef9re him. CCG: NEPETA, LISTEN TO KANKRI. CAC: :33 < no one evpur likes when i talk about ships so why do mew all think i k33p them to myself CHW: I need s9me9ne wh9'd understand that I really d9n't enj9y physical c9ntact 9n a regular 6asis.. -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  crosses arms -- CHW: Im just asking that y9u put m9re th9ught int9 y9ur ships, it isn't fair t9 ship s9me9ne with s9me9ne wh9 w9uld 6e p9ssi6ly, t9 s9me extent, 9r t9 a high extent in this case, t9xic. CCG: EXACTLY. CCG: I HAVE A BIAS AGAINST CRONUS BECAUSE HE'S A TOXIC MOTHERFUCKER. CAC: :33 < people ship karkitty and eridan CCG: THEY WHAT CHW: I d9n't even like P9rrim c9ddling me, 6ut I w9uld have a 6etter chance surviving a relati9nship with her than Cr9nus. CAC: :33 < what do mew have to say about that CTA: iim 2orry for your lo22, KK. CHW: They d9? H9w, ah, unf9rtunate f9r Karkat. CCG: I ... CCG: I'M SHIPPED WITH EVERYONE. I'M LITERALLY THE MOST SHIPPED PERSON OUT OF US ALL, DUDE. CAC: :33 < yeah and they ship you with literally everyone CCG: YEAH. CCG: EXACTLY. CAC: :33 < like kankri and dirk CAC: :33 < thats a thing CHW: Wait- 'y9u' as in Karkat, 9r y9u as in, me? CAC: :33 < fur some reason CAC: :33 < you CCG: OH, I'M SHIPPED WITH DIRK? ODD. CHW: They ship me with a human I've never met? CAC: :33 < yup CTG: mi shipped with like) CTG: every single one of my friends CTG: *im CHW: ...W-wait wait wait?? CHW: D9 they- ship me with, .. Kurl9z???? CAC: :33 < meow mew should tell me how much i should think about my ships! CAC: :33 < yes they do! CEB: i try not to look at that stuff. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  shivers run down his spine as his normally hot blood goes cold -- CCG: STOP. CAC: :33 < i dont control i just add CCG: DON'T MAKE HIM THINK ABOUT KURLOZ. CAC: :33 < he asked CCG: EVERYONE SHUT UP ABOUT SHIPS. THIS IS GOING BAD. CHW: I'm g9ing t9 have s9me seri9us nightmares CAC: :33 < mewr own fault CHW: I d9n't kn9w h9w I'm g9ing t9 ever face any 9f my friends again kn9wing every interacti9n is 6eing put thr9ugh a quadrant lense. CHW: # celi6acy 4 life CHW: 9r rather CHW: # celi6acy 4 afterlife CAC: :33 < mew shoulve already known that the shipping unipurse is nevfur ending -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  smacks his face into his own desk -- CHW: Karkat d9n't hurt y9urself! Are y9u 9kay? -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  rushes over to check your face -- -- CURRENT twiinArmageddons [CTA]  aggressive sighing. -- CCG: THIS CONVERSATION GAVE ME A LUNG DISORDER. CCG: JOHN WHERE YOU AT? CEB: me mum's car. CEB: no. CHW: This c9nversati9n has given me s9me heart issues, and s9me seri9us 6rain cancer CAC: :33 < get out me car CHW: # 9h- wait CHW: # That c9uld 6e 9ffensive CHW: Im s9 s9rry if that triggered any 9f y9u- CCG: DID YOU JUST MAKE A CANCER JOKE? CEB: i mean like did you just want my attetion or just actually want to know where i am? CHW: That was very a6lest 9f me CCG: RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME? CHW: yes CHW: Im s9 s9rry CCG: I'M... CCG: T R I G G E R E D CHW: Im s9 s9 s9 s9rry CAC: :33 < oh no CEB: god damn. CAC: :33 < karkitty got triggered by the one who is supposed to watch out fur triggers CTG: 0w0 CAC: :33 < this is escalating CHW: Ah, I- I'd 9ffer t9 g9 get y9ur m9irail, 6ut I th9ught y9u and Gamzee were m9irails, and hes in here s9- -- CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB]  smdh -- CCG: THIS GAMZEE ISN'T EVEN THE ONE FROM MY TIMELINE. CCG: AND I THINK HE KILLED VRISKA. CHW: 9h- Im, s9 s9rry- really CCG: MY GAMZEE IS OFFLINE RIGHT NOW. TRAGIC. CHW: I am CHW: s9 s9 s9 s9rry -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  slowly glances down at his sweater bearing the Cancer symbol on it. -- CCG: YOU BETTER BE. CHW: H9w can I help y9u thr9ugh y9ur panic attack that I certainly 6r9ught 9n y9u- Im- Im s9 s9 s9rry CCG: OH. CCG: MY UH CCG: OH RIGHT CCG: UM CCG: YOU CAN'T. YOU'VE KILLED ME. I'M DYING. CEB: nooo karkat! CHW: W-well, ah, I can 9ffer this 6it 9f c9mf9rt, the, ah, dream 6u66les aren't s9 6ad 9nce y9u get used t9 them.. CTG: shouty- CHW: ):6 CAC: :33 < rip CHW: Y9u c9uld even stay in my hive with me if y9ud like? I have a spare r99m 9r tw9- CHW: Its, actually.. quite l9nely -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  whispers 'this is why mew should listen to ships' -- CCG: I CCG: YEAH, SURE. CCG: I'M DOWN. CHW: Alright, I will ah, clean up 9ne 9f the r99ms f9r y9u, make sure they aren't dusty if r99ms even can get dusty here- and y9u can make it h9wever y9u w9uld like. It w9uld 6e nice t9 have s9me9ne living with me. Th9ugh I will warn y9u, I am a nightmare t9 wake up, s9, please d9 n9t try t9 distur6 me when I'm sleeping. I get really, ah, as.. p9rrim, puts it.. Kranky.. CAC: :33 < kranky kankri CHW: I c9uld even sh9w y9u my arsenal , if y9u'd 6e interested in such a thing. Please d9 n9t call me that, Nepeta. It is 6ad en9ugh when P9rrim d9es.. CCG: N-NOTED. CAC: :33 < sorry it was just a lil funny CHW: I see why it w9uld 6e amusing t9 9thers, 6ut as it has 6ec9me a name used t9 hurt me, like... insuffera6le.. I w9uld prefer n9t t9 have such a name called t9 me. CAC: :33 < oh oops -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  is visibly torn between reassurring Kankri that he's not insufferable, or telling him that he is. The Karkat Struggle(tm). -- CCG: THIS IS A MESS. CEB: . CHW: # I w9uld understand if y9u did... # I did make a triggering j9ke... CEB: :B CCG: JOHN. CHW: # I really am insuffera6le... CEB: yes? CCG: OH GOD DAMN IT. CCG: YOU'RE NOT INSUFFERABLE, KANKRI, SHUT. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  considering joining sweater town population Kankri  -- -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  me -- -- CURRENT tipsyGnostalgic [CTG]  joins sweater town gleefully -- -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  also joins sweater town. -- -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  pulls sweater over head, hiding in it -- CHW: # sweater t9wns getting cr9wded -- CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB]  windsock town. -- -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  hat town -- CTG: ive never seen nep wear a sweater ebfore CTG: *before CAC: :33 < its my trench coat or my beanie that i can hide in CHW: If I get really desperate, I hide in my pants in my sweater. Extra pr9tecti9n. # high pants f9r the win CCG: PERTURBING, THANKS. CAC: :33 < legendary leggings CHW: I l9ve my leggings s9 much they are s9 c9mf9rta6le -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  just thought about it, when you two joined sweater town, did you join my sweater town, or your own ?_? -- -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  has no idea -- -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  has his own sweater and has started his own Sweater Town. -- -- CURRENT tipsyGnostalgic [CTG]  joined kankris sweater town -- CHW: Sweater t9wn is trademarked, y9u must rename 9r rel9cate Karkat -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  is grinning  -- CCG: FUCK OFF. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  is blushing at Roxy being in his sweater with him, but isn't pushing her away -- CCG: THERE'S NOT ENOUGH ROOM FOR ME AND ROXY IN YOUR SWEATER TOWN SO I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO START MY OWN. CHW: We c9uld stretch the fa6ric- alth9ugh, P9rrim w9uld pr96a6ly send me t9 a d9u6le death CTG: wait CHW: 6ut y9ur s9 small it sh9uldn't 6e t9 6ig a deal CCG: I'M GOOD. CTG: does tihs mean were sharing a sweater CHW: Yes CTG: *this -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  turns his fucking head around -- CCG: DID YOU JUST CALL ME SMALL? CTG: oh CTG: eh CHW: I ah, y9u are sh9rter than a l9t 9f pe9ple, Karkat -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  stares. -- CEB: i'm just over here in my windsock. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  hides back in sweater town -- -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  is no longer here as hes in sweater town, come back later -- CHW: # sweater t9wn is nice this time 9f year CTG: its very cweaty CTG: *Sweaty CCG: SHORT? SHORT! I CAN'T *FUCKING* BELIEVE THAT WORD JUST LEFT YOUR MOUTH? DO YOU EVEN THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK? DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT KIND OF HARM YOU'VE CAUSED? CTG: woank wonk CCG: THE NEXT TIME YOU SAY SUCH DAMAGING THINGS TO ME WE'LL BE ON THE SET OF DR. PHIL, I GUARANTEE YOU THAT. CTG: *wonk CAC: :33 < mewr taller than me CCG: DO YOU HAVE EVEN THE VAGUEST COMPREHENSION OF WHAT PAINFUL MEMORIES YOU'VE RESURFACED, KANKRI? CHW: Its a fact, n9t an 9pini9n, Karkat, I- .. I'm s9rry it upset y9u, 6ut it w9uld 6e like, calling me thin? I am? CEB: short. CCG: YOUR INSENSITIVITY *BAFFLES* ME. CCG: HOW HIDEOUSLY OPPRESSIVE. CCG: "SHORT" IS A HURTFUL AND FRANKLY DEROGATORY TERM. -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  is deliberately saying things Kankri would probably say. -- CHW: H9w w9uld y9u descri6e y9ur height then, Karkat? CCG: *FINE!* CCG: I WOULD DESCRIBE MY HEIGHT AS FINE. CTG: under average CCG: AVERAGE! CTG: uh CTG: i mean fine CCG: FUCK OFF ROXY. CTG: yeah CTG: sorry shouts -- CURRENT tipsyGnostalgic [CTG]  does the paps -- CHW: Its. ah- n9t quite what I image as average, 6ut, ah, 9kay. If thats what y9ud prefer me t9 call it. then, yes. Y9u are "average" CEB: someone just messaged me and said there was a bucket behind me, guys i'm worried. CCG: AWKWARD SILENCE. CEB: help. CCG: NO. CEB: damn it. CCG:  CHOKE. CEB: :B CTG: ;3 CCG: N...NO. CEB: ;B CTG: wonk CTG: wonk CAC: :33 < karkitty burnt chicken nuggets CCG: GOD DAMN IT. CHW: I w9uld suggest ign9ring the p9ssi6le 6ucket as it in itself isn't g9ing t9 f9rce y9u t9 d9 anything, and instead f9cus 9n wh9 put it there and why. 6ut, then again, 6uckets might genuinely just 6e upsetting t9 y9u, s9 9nce y9u are f9r sure that n9 9ne else is ar9und, I w9uld disp9se 9f it. CCG: NEPETA, WHY?- CAC: :33 < i dunno i felt like exposing mew CCG: FUCKER. CAC: :33 < hehe CEB: i don't even know who the troll was that put it there, they just came in, asked me about karkat, told me there was a bucket behind me and pissed off. CHW: I see, yes, I certainly w9uld suggest getting rid 9f the 6ucket s9meh9w. CCG: THEY ASKED ABOUT ME AND PUT A BUCKET BEHIND YOU? CCG: FEAR. CEB: still wanna choke me? or should i just yeet this bucket somewhere. CCG: HOLY FUCK -- CURRENT tipsyGnostalgic [CTG]  wonks in the distance -- CHW: # Ew CCG: YOU CAN'T SAY SHIT LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF PEOPLE. CCG: JOHN. CCG: I'M FUCKING LOSING MY MIND. CEB: oh shit. CCG: THIS IS A *MEMO*. CCG: DID YOU FORGET? CEB: oh no, i know full well. CCG: I CCG: ALRIGHTY THEN. CHW: J9hn if y9u want an audience, at least make sure the audience is wanting y9u. And, I kn9w f9r 9ne, I d9 n9t wish t9 see any9ne engage in such acts, much less with Karkat. It'd 6e, very awkward f9r me. CEB: i'm not being serious, i am a jester. CCG: RIGHT. CEB: my prankster's gambit is through the roof. FDC ceased responding to memo. CCG: YOU CAN SAY YOU'RE JOKING ALL YOU WANT BUT I KNOW THE TRUTH. CTG: this is incredibly siqlly CEB: what're you gonna do huh? expose me? you have no proof. CTG: *silly CCG: I HAVE ALL THE PROOF. CEB: that's not me, fool. CCG: MMMMMHM. CCG: WHATEVER YOU SAY. CEB: i have said nothing. CEB: my words are an illusion. CCG: YOU HAVE SAID *SO MUCH*. CHW: Haha CTG: i wish i ddint see this memo CCG: ME TOO. CTG: thats dhy i drink CHW: I ah, I feel s9me things a69ut this mem9. CTG: *hwy CTG: **why CEB: you made this memo karkat! CCG: AND I REGRET IT. CHW: I feel like that happens a l9t t9 y9u. CHW: I kn9w I tried t9 make a few mem9s during 9ur game.. And ah, a l9t 9f my friends w9uld just, wreck it. FUTURE carcinoGenesis [FCG] 69:00 HOURS FROM NOW responded to memo. FCG: DID YOU GUYS FORGET I WAS HERE? BECAUSE I'M STILL HERE, AND I'M WATCHING, AND I'M NOT LIKING. FCG: JOHN AND PAST ME BETTER BEHAVE. CEB: oh! hi future-kat. CCG: FUCK OFF KARKAT. CHW: Y9u kn9w if y9u d9 6ehave 9r n9t, Future Karkat, s9, d9 y9u? C:6 CHW: Please say yes FCG: ..... FCG: I THINK I'M GONNA...GO WATCH A ROMCOM. FCG: BYE. CCG: EXCUSE ME? CTC: I LikE fuTuRe YoU BetTeR CEB: w o w. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  mouth drops open to form an O.  -- CCG: I FORGOT GAMZEE WAS HERE. CCG: I'M A LITTLE SCARED. CHW: D9es this mean y9u d9 6ehave 9r d9es this mean y9u and J9hn get gr9ss? What d9es that mean? Als9, Gamzee, rude. CTC: Im MoThER fUcKiNg WaTcHiNG CHW: # Rude -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  also a bit more tense, knowing Gamzees watching. -- CCG: I'M NOT GOING WITHIN A FIVE YARD RADIUS OF JOHN. CEB: i'm not getting gross with karkat. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  glad that Kurloz isn't around -- FCG: DEBATABLE. CCG: DIE. CAC: :33 <  /me eats ice cream and lurks CTC: WhAtS tHe GaY SeCrEt ThEn CHW: Telling a future y9u t9 die is, kind 9f risky CCG: WHAT GAY SECRET? CAC: :33 < how did that not work CAC: :33 < that mew like dave? CCG: ??? CCG: I'M LOST. CHW: D9 y9u like the Dave human, Karkat? CCG: CAN WE STOP TALKING ABOUT DAVE? CAC: :33 < oh he so does CTC: CEB: dave knows sure as hell how gay he is ;B CCG: HOHLY SHIHFG CCG: SHUT HT EFUK UP CCG: SHUT THE FUCK UP. CAC: :33 < YEWS CAC: :33 < YES CCG: NONO NO NO NONO CCG: JOHN CAC: :33 < john thank mew CEB: that's what you get for calling me gay. CCG: JOHN. CCG: DON'T SAY ANYTHING. CCG: STOP! CTG: shouty ive heard your pretty gay CCG: IT'S A SECRET, OKAY? CCG: NO. CCG: DIE. CCG: FEAR. CHW: 99f CEB: h CCG: JOHN, LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  *has no fear* -- FCG: I WISH I KILLED MYSELF AT THAT MOMENT. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  *now has one fear* -- CEB: i'd say i'm sorry but i don't know how sorry i am. CTC: ArNt YoU DatInG diRk BrO? CCG: ???? CCG: OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT? CAC: :33 < ew what CCG banned CHW from responding to memo: [OUT.]. CHW RIGHT NOW opened memo on board FUCK BUCKETS.

---As I was kicked here, I didn’t see what happened in between me logging back into the memo---

CHW RIGHT NOW opened memo on board FUCK BUCKETS. CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CCG: ESPECIALLY YOU, GAMZEE. CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CAC: :33 < kankri can mew control him CHW: I was 699ted? CCG banned CTC from responding to memo: [OUT.]. CHW: what happened? CCG: I DON'T KNOW. CCG: I KICKED LIKE EVERYONE. CCG: BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL BEING WACK. CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CEB: i'm surprised you didn't ban me. CAC: :33 < he got huffy because we talked about him liking dave CHW: Y9u kicked every9ne? CCG banned CTC from responding to memo: [STOP COMING BACK!]. CHW: Rude Memo is now Invite-Only by CCG CCG banned CTC from responding to memo. CCG: FOR FUCK'S SAKE. CCG: ALRIGHT. CURRENT twiinArmageddons [CTA] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CTA: holy 2hiit.

--- My pester crashed, so I lost some more of the conversation ---

CHW RIGHT NOW opened memo on board FUCK BUCKETS. CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CCG: KANKRI DON'T LEAVE. CHW: Clicked the wr9ng 6utt9n that time CCG: OK. CHW: C9nnecti9n is 6eing dum6 CHW: I d9nt, understand why this is reacting s9 mean it didn't like the kick CHW: I sh9uld 6e g99d n9w CHW: I had t9 mess ar9und with the huskt9p it is s9 picky. And dream 6u66le internet isn't rela6le.. CCG: GAMZEE JUST TOLD ME TO BE MY GAY SELF. CHW: 9h? CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CAC: :33 < be mewr gay self karkitty CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CEB: we support you. CCG: I'M NOT GAY. CCG: I'M NOT A HOMOSEXUAL, JOHN. CEB: you trolls are at least a little gay. CCG: ONE HUNDRED PERCENT STRAIGHT. CAC: :33 < stop lying -- CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB]  laughing my whole ass off. It's on the floor now. -- CCG: I'M NOT LYING. CCG: JOHN YOU'RE THE ONE WHO MADE A CHOKING "JOKE". CEB: the life of a jester is a hard one. FUTURE carcinoGenesis [FCG] 69:00 HOURS FROM NOW responded to memo. FCG: YA'LL SUCK. CURRENT tipsyGnostalgic [CTG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CTG: evedryone is a little gay john CEB: the trolls are. CCG: AND YOU. CEB: where is your proof sir you have none. CCG: BET. CCG: PROOF: I EXIST. CEB: my apparent homosexuality brough karkat into existence. i'm so powerful. CCG: SMARTASS. CEB: :B -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  trying not to laugh -- -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  glares at Kankri. -- CCG: JOHN NEEDS TO SHUT UP. CHW: It's just all a 6it silly, t9 fight 9ver this CEB: sexuality is nothing to be ashamed of. CCG: NOT THIS SHIT. CAC: :33 < oof CCG: TROLLS DON'T EVEN *DO* SEXUALITY. I ONLY KNOW WHAT GAY *MEANS* FROM YOU AND DAVE! CEB: 1. thanks for that and 2. dave is very gay. CAC: :33 < he really is CCG: 1) YOU'RE WELCOME AND 2) I KNOW. CAC: :33 < of course mew would -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  wiggles eyebrows -- CCG: I ... -- CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB]  Wheezing. -- CCG: I'M GOING TO VORE EVERYTHING YOU HOLD DEAR. CCG: TO QUOTE DAVE. CTG: wonk CTG: wonk CTG: wonk CEB: he's so weird. CCG: AGREED. CCG: GOOD THING I *LOATHE* HIM. CAC: :33 < love* CCG: LOATHE. CHW: He's said that? Thats, ah, intense. -- CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC]  sighs -- CCG: JOHN, GO TO DMS FOR A SECOND... CHW: I will 6e right 6ack, s9mething came up and I need t9 g9 tend t9 it, it sh9uld 9nly take a c9uple 9f m9ments. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  goes to take care of business -- CCG: ALRIGHT. CEB: okay! CCG: ANYWAYS, JOHN FELL RIGHT INTO MY TRAP. CCG: I HAVE PROOF NOW. CAC: :33 < oki CCG: THANKS, JOHN, YOU ABSOLUTE MORON. CEB: god damn it. CCG: AHAHAHAH. CEB: you fool. CCG: I'M NO FOOL, YOU'RE THE FOOL! CCG: I ENTRAPPED YOU. CEB: i will obliterate your shins. CCG: I'M POSTING THE LOGS. CCG: YOU CAN'T STOP ME. CEB: i'm gonna do it. CEB: here i come, after your shins. CCG: SO AM I. CCG: YOU CAN'T CATCH THESE LEGS. CCG: I'M POSTING THE FUCKING LOGS HERE GOES: CCG: [03:17] CG: SMOOCH SMOOCH. [03:18] EB: fucking uwu mwah. CCG: YOU ARE *NOT* STRAIGHT. CTG: holy shit CTG: i knew it CCG: YEAH ME TOO. CEB: how else is one supposed to respond to getting smooched at okay?? CTG: whoa CTG: what the fuck CTG: shoutoy and windsock jake? CTG: *shouty CCG: YOU ALSO CALLED A PICTURE OF US CUTE. -- CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB]  Turns into mist. I'm mist kin now. -- CCG: COWARD. -- CURRENT ectoBiologists [CEB]  The Mist cannot communicate. -- CCG: REST IN PIECES. CTG: lol CEB: i can't frown with my emoji so i'm just gonna :( CCG: I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY BUT I CAN'T BRING MYSELF TO SAY IT IN FRONT OF THESE FUCKERS SO BACK TO DMS I GO FOR ONE (1) SECOND. CAC: :33 < i gotta go CCG: OH FUCK, OKAY. CAC: :33 < byeeee CCG: BYE NEPETA! CEB: bye nepeta! CCG: JINX. CTG: bye nep CAC ceased responding to memo. CHW: I'm sad I missed saying g99d6ye t9 nepeta. 6ut I have returned (:6 CCG: WELCOME BACK. CEB: ey! CTG: this is getting quite boring CCG: AGREED. CHW: Thank y9u, and it is getting quite repetitive CCG: IT WAS FUN WHEN IT WAS CHAOTIC. -- CURRENT hashtagWarrior [CHW]  in a way to try to revive that chaotic spirit, looks over at Sollux -- CCG: THINK IT'S TIME TO DELETE THE MEMO? -- CURRENT carcinoGenesis [CCG]  also looks at Sollux. -- CHW: G9t anything t9 add, I kn9w Mituna is pretty g99d at stirring things up CURRENT twiinArmageddons [CTA] RIGHT NOW responded to memo. CTA: ii CHW: S9, n9thing really? CTA: ii don't know ii've been put on the 2pot. CHW: 9h, I see, n9t a sp9t light dancer then, thats 9kay. I supp9se this mem9 has run its c9urse, 6ut I'll 6e sad t9 let it g9, as it's 6een fun and the 6u66les are quite l9nely. CCG: HOW ABOUT... CCG: WE AGREE TO MAKE ANOTHER MEMO SOMETIME IN THE FUTURE WHEN EVERYONE IS HERE AGAIN? CTG: sounds good CTA: that work2 for me. CHW: That w9uld 6e great. Always dm me if y9u want, I'm always ar9und, and when Im n9t, I'll get right 6ack t9 y9u. CCG: GREAT. CCG: NOTED. CCG: SEE YOU, NERDS. CHW: G99d6ye, and enj9y y9urselves. CEB: i'm always down for chatting! bye everyone! CCG banned CEB from responding to memo: [BOOP.]. CCG banned CTG from responding to memo: [BOOP X2.]. CCG banned CTA from responding to memo: [BOOP X3.]. CCG banned CHW from responding to memo: [BOOP X4.].

[thattransguy1311]

So this is me. I live my day to day life sort of genderless (if thats a word) i do whatever feels most natural to me. Reason for that being i know I’m a guy but i don’t feel like there’s any one right or correct way to be a guy. I have many friends from all over the gender and sexuality spectrum. This has made me realize that who i am what i like to do or things that i like don’t take away from my gender. The two have nothing to do with one and other. I do “pass” for the most part but since I’m not exactly out yet i dont get addressed by male pronouns (except by accident) i do mostly go by my nickname. Almost no one uses my real name. I’m kind of At this point or stage in my life right now where I feel like I’m way too in the middle for anything. By that i mean cis guys will date me say they’re fine with who i am then try to get me to be more femme or just treat me like a girl if that makes any sense. Lesbians.. Well i do like girls but i have way too much body disphoria for a girl to go down on me or anything like that (tmi i know sorry) so things don’t really work there either. Straight cis girls just dont see me as guy so I’m not exactly an option for them. And in the trans community I’ll be honest just doesn’t seem to be an option for me either. I’ll try to talk to other trans people who post you know looking for friends or whatever and it seems like for the most part unless you’re they’re exact type (post op, on t, stealth, passing, far along in your transition things like that) theyre just not interested. So long story short i just have no idea where i belong right now. How to meet people, make friends, any of it. If you know lol hmu lmk ask me anything tell me anything.

[in-paradox-space]

So my friend knows somebody who knows somebody that works at a pharmacy.

They said they can get prescription medicines like morphine pills for a price.

I’m going to do it. Transcending codeine and moving on to pure morphine.

I’ll probably be on heroin in two years, yolo!

I wanted to buy promethazine/codeine cough syrup but they said they have nothing like that. I’m not even sure if the prometh/co mix is even a thing in the UK.

I’m gonna buy the morphine pills. 

Codeine is basically morphine but to a tenth of the power.

’m gonna get a supply of codeine syrup (probably online) and mix it with some prometh and codeine pills I source from online pharmacies. I might mix it with grape soda or something. 

I’m going to make my own brand of lean and sell it in the UK. Nobody here sells it and I swear, if I let people try it they will pay to feel it again.

It’s easy to source it at this point, but not everybody has the knowledge I have. People here are still doing CWE or just risking overdose on pain pills like cocodamol.

They’ll probably try to source the shit themselves but they’ll give in. 

They’ll just buy it from me.

idrk how im gonna do this

i dont think im going to get rich from this but I’ll probably break even.

If not, I’ll feel cool because I have lean anyway.

I’m trying to stop for like a week, hopefully two, to reset my tolerance.

it’s been like 2 days I guess but not really 

I’ve cut down

I’m not physically dependent but little things, mentions of opiates, painkillers, pleasure, fame or achievement make me think of it. 

I want to get high.

I don’t crave it. I can type this, knowing there’s enough codeine next to me to sweep me off my feet, knowing I’m not going to take it tonight and feel alright. 

I need a friend to hold onto my stash while I detox.

It’s not really useful if I can access it this easy. 

If I give it to my friend who knows about this shit he’ll probably take them himself or OD. I don’t want him to get into any more drugs or try to kill himself.

My main friend doesn’t know much about this.

I’ve loosely spoke to him about it long ago but we’ve never spoke about it.

we’ve spoke about caffeine addiction but thats not seen as a narcotic. 

It’s not as shameful to talk about.

everybody drinks coke.

nobody thinks anything about it.

I’m sure it will be illegal one day.

i dont want to give it to family.

i dont have a lot of options

and i dont want to part with them

I have like 100-200 pills. I should buy more but I’m pretty low on cash. 

I need to pay rent, travel, buy clothes, a new phone and pay for my education. 

Speaking of education.

I’m pretty, idk the word, 

my ego feels shame

I bigged myself up so much

I was stupid to get into this. 

College isn’t me. It’s so far away from my authentic self.

I’m really, really considering dropping out. 

I haven’t made the first trimester or finished the first project. 

It just really, really isn’t me.

The point was always to make cash but I lost the flame that got me onto the course.

I’ll make cash from my long term backup plan.

I’m retaking my GCSES online, so I can take my A-Levels next year. Then probably more GCSEs. 

Even if I don’t choose my current backup plan at that point, I’ll have more options if I choose to sell out again.

so yeah, I feel pretty guilty, ashamed, other shitty feelings.

Sort of awkward and embarrassed. Everybody said I’d stop going and I’d drop out.

They was right and they’re pretty dumb about a lot of things, but the fact they was right about this will validate the stupid sides of them. If you understand what I’m saying. 

It’s 2am, so I’m sort of just typing without correcting.

I guess living in the moment

being happy is important

I’m alive

If I live longer than I thought I would I have time

even if i dont achieve anything

I’ll enjoy a lot of my life

and I’ll die

new people will continuously be born into this world

they will have joy and achievement

I accept this

Happiness was always more important.

Drugs are my escape

drugs are instant gratification

they’re not happiness, but wanting to be happy leads me to them

I’m proud to say I haven’t done MDMA since that really shit comedown last time though

the brain zaps and super low feelings.

I don’t want to do it again.

I might do it again though, when I visit some friends in Europe with my other druggy friend

he’s not really a druggy but that’s the only context I’ve ever mentioned him in here

that’s how a lot of people see him 

that’s not him though.

he has a lot of other interests, talents and knowledge

he doesn’t have a lot of options right now so he just lives in the moment when he can 

but hes trying to get out of it

he’s definitely making an effort

the people around him aren’t

I appreciate that about him

he’s not giving up. 

he’s spending longer amounts of time clean each time he tries again

he’s still dependent on weed but he can survive days without it

his main problem is honestly environment or the people around him

his girlfriend is just 

dramatic

shes a cunt and starts things for her own sake

I tell him, she is a thot, he’s like nah bro i love her though

love is an illusion

its just chemicals

he knows this deep down

the more of a cunt she is, the sooner he will eventually cut himself off from her

I think it’s coming soon

maybe he can help me sell the lean

I hope I keep at trying to sell lean

I get so motivated and driven to finish projects

i get so deep and so close to getting somewhere

then a few months later i lose all interest

just like i did with photography and college

then i move onto something else exciting, which could honestly be my break

like selling lean

then i repeat the cycle

thats why i call myself consistently inconsistent

i wish i could stick at this shit

ive noticed a plethora of patterns in my lifestyle

every year I repeat the story

redeciding what matters to me

i know it all to be true

nothing to be false

everything to be possible

every feeling is a choice.

so yeah uh 

drugs fam

theyre bad

but i like them 

i also need cash

if u need drugs just hmu fam i can source u anything

if youre a cop be warned I’ll show u a time so good you’ll have to quit your job