#if you do not I'm sure you are gonna find a thousand other posts hating on this fictional family

[asongofstarkandtargaryen]

Perfect families don't exi--

Me remembering that R+L = J.

The reason why both Rhaegar and Lyanna had to die so young ( besides that it serves the plot) is that growing up with them Jon would have been too overpowered for the story to handle.

The son of Ice and Fire, indeed.

[quokkareactions]

Stray Kids as angst tropes:

Hey, guys! Okay, so I was in the mood for writing some angst, so here you go four angsty Stray Kids drabbles. I still have to work on Seungmin's, which means I'll probably post the other four tomorrow. Until then I hope you enjoy these ones.

Kisses😘

Chan:

You and Chan were walking down the street holding hands and laughing when a girl stopped in her tracks next to you.

"Chan? Is it really you?" she said with a surprised laugh.

The confusion on Chan's face quickly changed into pure happiness when he recognised the girl.

You've never met the girl before but you know exactly who she is. You know that she's the owner of the box of women's clothes on the highest shelf in Chan's closet. You know that she's the reason why Chan's watching Attack on Titan every Tuesday night. You know that he can't say he loves you because of her. And it hurts even if you told him a thousand times that it's okay. He looks at you like you're the prettiest girl in the world, but her... He looks at her like she's his whole world.

"Chan, stop apologising"

"But I didn't know this will happen, we were only supposed to meet to catch up a bit, not to find our unresolved feelings for each other"

"I did"

"What?" he looks at you in confusion.

"I knew this was coming, she was always who you'd choose"

"I'm so sorry, y/n"

"I guess it was my mistake" you let out a bitter laugh.

"No, don't you dare say you're at fault"

"I should've left sooner" now both of your eyes were glossy from tears. "Goodbye, Chan"

You hugged.

"I wish you all the best, y/n"

Minho:

Ringing. Not even remotely unusual sound for Minho. Especially because his best friend since high school was calling him nonstop for the last few days. He just ignored it for the most parts. He didn't want to talk to her. He had no idea what to say to her after what happened at Friday night. But then the ringing stopped and did not start again like Minho anticipated it to, like it did oh so many times already this weekend. What happened? Did you give up?

He almost felt relieved but then he realized... He knows you too well to believe you gave up. You're too persistent. And boy was he right. The next thing he hears is banging on his door.

"Open the fucking door, Minho, or I swear to god I'm gonna kick it in your face"

With a sigh he opens the door and you storm in.

"Y/n, seeing you is always a delight"

"Cut the crap, Min, I deserve at least an explanation"

"I'm not sure I can give you the explanation you wanna hear"

"Please, what happened? I thought you wanted it too" you whispered.

"We ruined our friendship"

"No, we didn't. Our friendship doesn't have to be ruined just because we start dating, it's not..."

"I don't want to date you! I never have and never will" he cuts in bitterly.

"But... I watched you go out with numerous girls waiting for the day you realize that the right girl was right in front of you the whole time" you trail off, tears now freely falling from your eyes.

"Sleeping with you was the worst mistake of my life" he answers without any emotion what so ever.

"And knowing you was mine. Fuck you, Lee Minho!"

With that you walk out of his apartment and his life. You never wanted to see him again not as a friend, not as a lover and not even as a stranger on the street. You wanted to forget him and the piece of your heart that he took for forever.

Changbin:

It was collecting up in you for long by now. Ever since Changbin and you became official you're getting hate from his fans. And we are talking about regular death threats level of hate. But when your sister got involved too you had enough. You decided to break up with Changbin. It was a hard decision but you had to do it, you couldn't take it anymore. Even though he had a really hard time dealing with the fact.

"Please tell me at least part of it was real" he pleaded

"All of it was real but I can't do this anymore. I'm not strong enough to bear it"

"Don't say it. Don't say goodbye"

"I'm so sorry, Changbin" you choked out, lips trembling, voice cracking and tears collecting on your lashes. "But we were never meant to last"

You left the room and was about to open the front door when he shouted after you.

"If you knew that from the start you should have told me before I fell in love with you"

For him the only indication of you hearing it was the sound of the front door closing right after. That was the last time you saw each other.

Hyunjin:

You and Hyunjin were madly in love at the start of your relationship and you made sure that everyone knew that. You were probably the cringiest couple alive. You did everything together and you were all over each other all the time. So everything was perfect until your third year anniversary. You had a huge fight and Hyunjin left and spent the night at his friend's. A girl he suddenly started to spend an awful lot of time with. Since then you felt further and further away from each other. You stopped going out together.

You were slipping away from each other and what is better evidence to that than the situation you're in right now. You are standing exhausted and completely soaked by the rain in front of the Café you work in. The Café your boss closed at 19:00. Exactly when he does everyday, exactly when your shift ended and exactly when you asked Hyunjin this morning to pick you up from there. That was an hour ago. Since then the rain is getting more and more intense. You are not  sure anymore whether it's the rain or your tears that's running down your cheek constantly.

At the start of the hour you thought it's him every time a car passed by. You are not hoping anymore. Not even sure why are you still waiting for him, you could've gotten on a bus and you'd already be home.

[ninyard]

Hellooo i saw that you were asking for asks (that sounds funny) and I wanna know some of your hcs on Kevin and Allison being besties/ kevjean relationship

This is my chance to finally share some Allison/Kevin hcs so I'm gonna seize this opportunity with both hands and give you this total MESS of a brain dump

- Allison is the only fox that doesn't make fun of Kevin's eating habits. Kevin KNOWS his relationship with food is fucked up because of the nest and Allison knows it too, so she refuses to make bets or make fun of the way that he eats. Kevin only realised because she once tried to quietly tell Nicky to knock it off when he was pushing Kevin to have dessert or making fun of what he'd decided to have instead.

- Kevin also knows not to talk about the numbers or macros in front of her, too. They have a weird unspoken mutual respect RE: food and they both appreciate each others efforts on that front without ever actually mentioning it. they also have a gesture for each other that's code for "i want a snack do you have anything" and they'll throw each other protein bars if they're out/on a long bus journey etc.

- they are the BEST drinking buddies. Whenever the team starts drinking/partying/clubbing more together post-TKM, they are literally CHILDREN when they're drunk together. Kevin gets tired of the monsters being boring when they go out and there's only so much dancing he can do with just Nicky and Aaron alone. So Allison pulls him up to the bar one night to do a tequila shot, and they literally have the most unexpectedly fun night ever. Kevin loosens up a whole lot without the threat of Riko etc post tkm, and when I tell you he is such a fun drunk. now he doesn't really drink THAT much during the season but off-season? oh he's a party animal. I could write thousands of words about him and Allison getting drunk together and becoming literal best friends as soon as they have a drop of alcohol in their systems but here's some things I think they've done drunk

stole a shopping cart and sat in it as they pushed each other down the road in it (and fallen out of it and laughed so fucking hard) ((but were bruised up as fuck the next day because of it)

he's sat her on his shoulders - while dan sits on matt's - as the two girls try to push the other one off

he's really easily convinced to do things by her. another shot? sure. and another shot IMMEDIATELY after that? alrighty! karaoke? well, okay. jockeyback? stealing traffic cones? pulling pranks and fucking with the other foxes? acting like actual teenagers? okidokie!

she's probably the only person in the world who has successfully convinced kevin day to sing

he holds back her hair if she has to puke

she convinced him to let her do his makeup once. full glam. like a serious look, fully beat, full coverage look. there's a picture out there somewhere of it that she saves for blackmail.

fucked. make out sometimes. strip poker. they dance together :)

he never lets her walk alone anywhere when she's drunk. if she can't find one of the girls to accompany her to the bathroom at a party she'll take him.

she's taught him full dance routines

she was joking that there's no way the raven warmups could be that different to theirs, and bet him that she'd be able to do them without breaking a sweat (he won)

they've both ugly drunk cried in front of each other (but they never talk about that sober)

she's pretty light so he's bench pressed her before

- They know each others drink orders/favourite shots

- if Allison is out, say she's with her friends and not with the foxes, and she has to wait alone for a taxi or walk somewhere alone, she'll call him and he'll stay on the phone with her until she's safe

- They make fun of each other and bully each other like there's no tomorrow (affectionate). the whole "Allison hates Kevin" thing WAS true for a while, but once they get closer, she just pretends to hate him. he's like an annoying brother to her

- Allison is really easily frightened, and Kevin thinks it's funny to scare her. she's never safe walking around a corner or into a room if Kevin is there and in a good mood.

- they're not BEST FRIENDS. like they're not in each others pocket all the time and laughing and joking ALL THE TIME but she can read him like a book. she knows when he's having an off day, or thinking about something too much.

- She also knows when he's being serious and when not to joke around. She knows when he doesn't want cheering up or to joke about something and knows when to back off. The same with him - he knows when she's having a mood that requires being cheered up, or a mood that requires him to leave her the fuck alone.

- He's a big reason why she puts a whole lot more of herself into Exy post tkm. She's always been invested, but once they talk more, and they consider each other friends, she listens to him talking about Exy and it really clicks for her. his dedication. and also how fucking talented he really is. She doesn't do the night training with him but they'll occasionally go to the gym together or start practice a half an hour early to run some basic raven drills.

- They're iconic when they get together to do press after games. they bounce off each other like nothing else. they're just so funny. and he's also like andy murray in that he will ALWAYS defend her, dan, and renee's talent if interviewers start to focus more on him instead of the girls. he'll step in if an interviewer says something shitty or misogynistic. she LOVES directing objectifying and misogynistic questions his way.

- She calls him a bitch and makes fun of him for being a nepo baby. He calls her an asshole and makes fun of her for being a rich kid.

- Have gone to banquets as each others date.

that's just a few random thoughts off the top of my head but yes. Allison and Kevin. Literally the only Two Pretty Best Friends ever to exist.

[angelus-scripturae]

Heyy! Could you do headcannons for the boys with a partner that is a very well known youtuber/streamer? Thank youuuu! <3 (also I'm Dyslexic so sorry for any spelling mistakes!)

Of course! I actually wanted to write something like this soon so thank you for giving me a reason to!

Also i’m dyslexic too i very heavily rely on autocorrect lol :))

ALSO IM SORRY ABOUT MY PROLONGED ABSENCE ONE OF THE PEOPLE HERE WHO HELPED LEFT SO IM TRYNA LEARN TO WRITE SMUT SO I CAN KEEP GOONG WITH IT AND NOW ONE OF MY IRL FRIENDS IS HERE (sorry mate) PLEASE BARE WITH MEZ

The Boys headcannons for an influencer!reader.

Pairings: EddieVR x Reader, juicyfruitsnacks x reader, joshdub x reader, sleepymully x reader, YourNarrator x reader.

Warnings: Bad language, mentions of guns/ robbery, shitty writing.

Eddie

I feel like you would be a paranormal investigation channel in this case

Or a channel that does scary short films/ skits

You upload your clips from streams and videos onto tiktok and other social media

One time when doing a “Worlds scariest tiktoks?” video, someone had sent in one of your videos for him to react to

He found it so scary that he reached out to you.

He asked for you to help him and the boys at some haunted places and you two just began to bond and become close.

One night he invited you out to ‘record’ with him and the boys but when you arrived, he was there with a hand made poster.

Almost like a promposal

At first, you started laughing out of confusion but when you realised it was serious you immediately said yes to dating him.

Fans had notice how close you two had gotten (even more than before) and started theorising.

Eventually, you told them after having a talk about where you wanted the relationship to go

Once everyone knew, the edits and posts talking about the two of you flooded in.

You both loved how sweet everyone was

Of course you both got hate from fans as does every internet-open relationship between two well loved people

However, all that matters is the two of you.

You help each other when the hate gets a bit extreme with love and breaks from socials

Eventually after a few years, Eddie takes you out to ‘record’ once again

However, when you get to the studio you were due to record at, there’s a small table with a candle in the middle

You turn around to ask Eddie what was going on, you saw him on one knee with a small, black, velvet box in hand

It seemed like a cheesy and cliché situation but as he asked you to marry him, you barely let him finish before saying yes.

Let’s just say fans went crazy finding this out

Narrator

You probably know what I’m gonna say

You’re a VR voice actor channel.

like the ones that troll people in vr with different voices

or just a normal va channel but we’re going with VR rn

He was recording with the boys when he started with his deep voice in a sort of fake-flirting situation

You gave it right back ofc

He was startled at first but then you set up a hole storyline and his fans loved it.

At the time, you hadn’t known who he was

but your comments did

they urged to to do more with him and so you reached out

you made more and more content together to the point the fans shipped you to the moon and back

you couldn’t deny your feelings for him any longer

so one day in a call with him you asked him out.

He said yes almost immediately

then backtracked and tried to act “cool” about it

that made you giggle

so you began dating and the fans could tell

Narrator became so much more bashful and touchy around you

especially in person

Although they new for sure when he proposed in a video where you all went to disney land and they loved it

so did you

You started crying

I feel like you were at the wishing well thing and you said something like

“i wish to marry my best friend” or smth as a joke

then you turned around and he was on one knee

The amount of edits with sappy songs in the background…

thousands

Juicy

You’re a streamer in this case

You were playing your favourite game on stream

it just so happened to be juicy’s favorite as well

Let’s say the boys were doing a “if you laugh you donate”

Juicy laughed and chose you to donate to

Then got hyped when he saw the game

Had to donate like $100

you got fucking hype at the money amount

You also sort of knew who he was so you freaked out that too

let’s time skip to after you ended stream

you checked your phone to find a twitter notif from him asking to record with you sometime

You obviously instantly accepted duh

so you did

you knew you liked him but never once thought he felt the same i mean it was just professional right?

WRONG

he was head over heels for you

always finding ways to be close to you or talk to you

Always trying to make you laugh

I mean always

makes him happy y’know

when he asked you out, he was half asleep on a discord call and just blurted it out

You said yes but had to remind him in the morning

He then got bummed out about not being able to say it extravagantly

accepted it none the less

Mully

You were dating wayyyy before you began youtube

Usually playing horror games or watching scary animations

However you weren’t very public

the fans only found you when you posted your engagement tweet. ikr

they went insane over it and bombarded you both with questions

“when’s the wedding?”

“how long have you been together?”

And the obvious jokes

a few people were upset you kept it from them but it’s your life innit lol

You can keep whatever you want from them

You even posted a vlog with him planning your wedding.

The fans had no clue when it was but waited semi-patiently

WENT INSANE when you dropped the date

on the day, you posted on insta with all the cute photos of you two kissing and having fun

but had a VERY cursed caption

he however posted cursed videos like you drunk after the reception or

any of the boys doing dumb shit

but had one of the sweetest captions you’ve ever seen

when the full video of the wedding dropped there were HUNDREDS of edits made

almost brought a tear to your eye :,(

Josh

G-mod

You met in G-mod

now I think i could stop it there but i’ll go into detail

you were kinda fuckin around and you were pretending to be a receptionist

when juicy and reekid came in doing their usual shenanigans trying to rob you

the audacity

You switched it onto them ofc

and it made amazing content so he asked for your discord

you didn’t talk for a few weeks before you got a video recommended to you saying

“Psycho receptionist pulled a gun on me!”

You watched it and soon realise it was what you had done

You sent him a message along the lines of

“Psycho? i though i was pretty tame.”

He then sent you a message apologising and offering to change the title

you then pointed out the fact you were joking and he went back to usual josh

Then asked you to join him and Eddie for a scary discord video

you agreed and had a blast

I mean of course you did with your effortless humour

through that you gained quite a large following on your main channels

you continued to record with josh but also focused on your own channels too

after about half a year he confessed to you

i’m the middle of recording a G-mid video

at first you thought it was a bit

when you realised it was serious you instantly agreed.

you let the relationship move quite slow

and the fans loved you both together when you became public on your one year anniversary (with a tweet)

though many people pressured you to tell them if you had plans for marriage

your answer was always the same

“we’ll see how it goes.”

Hi lovelies! sorry for such a long absence life is fucking me over recently and I’m hoping you’re not too mad for the absence

also thank yous for 75 followers <33333

[goblin-the-clown]

I feel like I've said this before but I want to make a full post about it. You're not supposed to hate any fnaf characters except from William. (Very long rant under the cut).

William is quite literally the face of evil in this universe, you're not supposed to like him or feel bad for him because he continuously does terrible things and he feels no guilt from doing them. Practically every other character has suffered his abuse in one way or another, sure he's had moments where he's been depressed, he had to deal with the death of his children, but he doesn't deserve your pity or sympathy. You can like him because he's a well-written character or villain, but I genuinely don't understand people who actually like the guy. I fucking hate him and I would like to sentence him to a thousand hells.

Now allow me to go over the other fnaf characters I see getting hated on that absolutely don't deserve it whatsoever.

Michael. Believe it or not there are some people who don't like him. He is continuously abused, neglected and manipulated by William. He's a victim, just like every other character I will list here. Just because he did something stupid and awful doesn't make him any less of a victim. I honestly don't think the bite would have happened at all if William had just paid closer attention to his children, I'm not entirely taking the blame off of Michael but it's something to consider. He likely did it for attention and it's very obvious he had no idea what would actually happen. After that he mainly only does good things to make up for this. He goes to find Elizabeth despite knowing there's very little chance of her being there, he tries to burn William in the fazbear frights fire to stop him from harming anyone else and he works with Henry to free the remaining souls in the pizzeria sim fire. It might just be me bc I'm a massive Michael fan but the hate is undeserved.

Elizabeth. Holy shit this one actually pisses me off so much!! There's way more Elizabeth haters than there are Michael haters (this probably partly has to do with her being a girl) and I don't understand it all. I actually don't believe she is Williams favourite at all, she is the only one who is canonically shown being abused by him and people somehow take this as her being the favourite?? I also don't believe William made Baby for her, he just said he did so nobody would find out the real reason he made the funtimes. She's not a spoiled brat, Scrap Baby practically proves this. Why would she be so desperate to make her father proud of her if he didn't constantly neglect her and make her feel like she's not enough? Also, she's a child. I don't really have time to explain the Baby and Elizabeth are separate theory so I'm only gonna count her actions as Scrap Baby here. She obviously had intent to kill Michael in pizzeria sim, which isn't a good thing but keep in mind she's been trapped in this metal body for so long she's hardly herself anymore. My point is the hate is undeserved and I love this complex gal so much. Stfu if you hate Elizabeth Afton.

Cassidy. This one makes a little bit more sense to me but I still ultimately hate this take. I've heard people say that they're just as bad as William which is pretty fucking hilarious actually. Tbh if I got murdered and stuck in a robot suit forever I'd be on that hate game as well. Once again, victim. They were literally murdered by that man. I honestly don't think that they thought Michael was William, afterall they hate him so much that they'd probably remember his face very clearly. I like the idea that Evan was just like "Oh shit that's my older brother, he killed me. Don't try to kill him though because it was an accident.' and they were like 'Ok.' and then tried to kill him anyway because they can't imagine not wanting to get revenge on your killer. William deserved everything that they made him go through in ultimate custom night, though I agree with "Leave the demon to his demons" and I'm glad they decided to let all the souls rest. Overall, undeserving of hate, that's a traumatised child. Same goes for all the other missing children.

Those were all I could think of for know but let me know any other characters you see get a lot of hate. I hope this brought some sense to any Michael, Elizabeth or Cassidy haters out there. Feel free to reblog with your own opinions, even if you disagree I'd like to hear your takes.

[pardonmydelays]

what do you love the most about twenty one pilots?

i fucking love this question, but there's no easy answer to it. i guess i'm gonna have to try tho, because sometimes i feel like maybe some of you don't really understand WHY i totally changed my entire blog when clancy came out (it's kinda like me loving this band was my biggest secret for such a long time, idk. i still remember how a few months before it i've mentioned something and anix literally yelled at me like "WHY THE FUCK YOU NEVER TOLD ME YOU LIKE TWENTY ONE PILOTS" lmao. anyway).

first of all, no one has ever made me feel so seen and understood. there's real magic in tyler joseph's lyrics, you might hate me for what i'm about to say right now, but speaking of tortured poets - for me it's not taylor, it's tyler. and the scariest part of it all is that i very often relate to his lyrics. but that's also beautiful - it's therapeutic in a way. so when clancy came out and i realized i relate to pretty much EVERY song on this record, i just thought to myself, oh lord, how did i survive this long without their music. it's always been them for me. i will never abandon them again, i swear.

second thing, the lore. you all know i'm a slut for stories told through music (*cough* musical theatre *cough*). also, if the plot of the story is complex and weird as fuck, there's a pretty big chance it will become my favourite thing in the world. the entire lore is an insane metaphor for mental health struggles so, obviously, i can find a part of myself in it. i would die for their lore, honestly. it's all i can think about. and clancy will always be my fucking blorbo.

another thing i love a lot about them, and it's something you don't really see if you don't watch their interviews or live performances, they are literally just two dudes. both josh and tyler have always been very anxious and awkward and weird and that's what makes them more human in my opinion - just two fucking idiots who are best friends, lmao. they are so relatable in every possible way. they are also the funniest dudes in the entire world. and their friendship is so fucking beautiful. the only difference between us and them, truly, is that they are extremely talented and they have their own band.

also, they care about the clique so fucking much, this was probably mentioned on my blog before (maybe even today in a previous ask). they don't care about the charts, about awards, about anything really, all they care about is their music and fans. they don't do it to be the best band in the world. they do it to save lives - our lives as much as their own (if it wasn't for this music i don't know how i would have fought this). and that's what makes them different and honestly, better than the other artists.

they are also pretty much unproblematic. i wasn't really sure if i should mention that, but i feel like i need to. tyler joseph made one stupid mistake a few years ago - the way people reacted to this still breaks my fucking heart. he realized he was wrong tho, he apologized. the other day i saw a post here on tumblr about how he's fucking problematic and racist and the worst man on the planet etc etc. can we... fucking stop, please. it was just a stupid joke and he knows it was dumb and unnecessary. most people wouldn't even apologize, but he did. end of story. i will defend him with my life (not saying he is perfect, but shit, if you want to cancel him for one mistake maybe you should look at yourself first).

i feel like there are thousand different reasons but i'm just gonna stop here, because it's too fucking long already and no one will read it anyway.

[kerryweaverlesbian]

2023, cawis created...

Last year I made a post (which I cannot find) delighted to have published 81,932 words to Ao3 over 20 fics. This year I beat that with 111,227! 25 fics new last year! and that's not including poetry or things I only posted to tumblr! How wonderful!! I'm gonna do a little commentary on each of them (and I will thoughtfully put it below the cut because as I said there are 25. There is a "horny" section with some explicit quotes so just scroll past to the next heading if you don't want to see that lol.

Comedies I like to go hehehe hahaha

Stakes Aren't Just For Vampires Cas and Dean get high and silly "You're repulsive," Dean says by rote, and he isn't sure if he meant it to but it comes out cloying and sweet, like an affectionate nickname.

The first one I posted last year! It took me until March :0 I wrote this one. For maybe a slightly mean reason haha. I saw a fic where Cas did a bet for money and I was like ?? why would CAS care about getting money?? So I tried to think of a situation where he would make a bet and this one materialized!

Did you notice! I used the old reliable Rule Of Three to make the ending of Dean not sure if he said "I love you" or just thought it more potent? He thinks and then immediately says what he's thinking twice before: Cas is perfect/"You're perfect" - Dean wants to kiss him/"I want to kiss you" - and then: "I love you Cas," he thinks he says. I chose "1000 dollars" from the CBBC comedy sketch show Stupid sketch where 2 old ladies ask how much something costs and it's a normal amount and they mishear as "A thousand pounds?! You can't expect me to buy a bun for a thousand pounds. Shame on you!! I am taking my business ELSEWHERE!". The comments won't all be this long lmao (<- edit: she's wrong)

I'll Drink To That Sam and Dean both come out as bisexual at the same time late in life and they're both flabbergasted "What, do you think about how every friend we have would be in bed?"  Dean tips his head to the ceiling thoughtfully and Sam wants to melt into the floor.  "You're horrible. I hate you. I hate spending time with you." 

The SECOND one I posted last year!! I had to cut off a joke where it's suggested that Cas may have had sex with Jesus Christ (but it's very possible he's just messing with Dean) for the sake of flow. First fic I chatted with @homoangel about so I always think of him when I think of this fic <3

I'VE CRAWLED FURTHER INTO THE VCR Cas's dream of being vored by the VCR machine is finally realised Intricate, high effort collaboration, all for the relatively unimportant end of entertaining other humans for somewhere around an hour and a half. The entire enterprise amounts to making pleasing shapes and noises for each other. Fruitless. Pointless...To spend months, years even, producing something, the only purpose of which is to waste more time…the decadence was astounding. [horny]

Speaking of fics that make me think of my friends! Wrote this for dear @castielsprostate's 1k event. Get weird get wild!! He is THE teevee angel and I love him I love him I love him for it!!!!!!

Tragedies Auogh ouch ow ouchies. Hehe <3

The Aftermath Dean and Cas have sex. It was great. Dean can't let it happen again. "He wonders - and he shouldn't, but - he wonders if Cas will sit here again, later, feeling out the absences that Dean is going to leave behind."

The THIRD one I posted this year!!! I went directly from silly silly silly to "[Dean] is a practical man, always has been. If there's something behind you that would kill you to look at it, you just don't look at it.". I think this is one of my best (<- guy who is going to say this about most of her fics sajbfhsv. I wouldn't post them if I wasn't proud of them!!)

Time/Body Problem Cas and Dean make out in the car before Cas's date in Heaven Can't Wait. It doesn't change anything. he's all sensation now, mind-body-time melted together like carved figures on a wax candle.

I wrote this and Aftermath on the same day. I was THINKING about how Dean and Cas so so so often ALMOST have it. Dean, here, is enthralled by the idea that Cas is human now and could want him (although, Cas definitely also wants him as an angel lmao but this is what Dean thinks) but also put off by it. When they kiss, he sees Cas as angelic, with a streetlamp halo, able to melt time, but when Cas is walking away from him, he's just some human guy who, crucially, can't save Dean anymore. Cas had reliably been the guy who could blast into any dangerous situation and come out on top (hot) and while that's not the only thing Dean likes about him, it WAS such a relief for scaredboy dangerlife Dean to have a guy who makes things SAFE. And now he can't. So the risk of making their relationship deeper feels even greater. Perhaps it is a selfish thought for Dean to want Cas to be able to rescue him still, but they're both in such perilous positions. He's worried for Cas too.

Oh did yous get the title by the way? It's like the mind/body problem which is, 'is the mind separate from the body or are they completely inextricable'? 'If I think of something sad and start crying while I'm hormonal, is that feeling from by body or from my mind' is how I understand it, but I'm not a philosopher haha. So time/body problem is like, all three of: Does their relationship need human senses and physical touch in order to be meaningful? Does Castiel's new experience of linear time (aka not being an angel) change how he and Dean relate to each other? And also, the more straightforward, they don't have enough time. Not to say I thought all that when the phrase came into my head, it's just bc I knew the phrase mind/body problem and mind slant rhymes with time, but that's why I liked it enough to use as a title haha.

Smoke Breaks series Dean and Cas share cigarettes at different points in their lives. Cas trails off, taking another long pull. He's going to smoke the whole thing at this rate, rude and overindulgent. Dean doesn't begrudge him, neither the cigarette nor the silence. He knows what he means. 

Someone told me in the comments that reading the first one fit exactly into their actual smoke break I was like WOAH :0!!! Smoking is, unfortunately, really sexy.......I keep trying to think of a way to add another fic to make this thing end on a positive note but the theme of smoking thwarts that haha. Inherently, it is about doing something you know is unhealthy and grey and makes you feel worse, like hunting, like endverse Cas's relationship with endverse Dean, like coming back to see the lover you hurt when you can't touch them or change anything, but it's always bitter sweet because you sometimes get that burst of relief. (That's not a commentary on smokers, just on the theme of smoking as used by this series!)

The last one I think drives that home most bluntly, "No amount of talking is going to change anything." but they still hold on to each other. Also in the last one, I just wanted them to be in kind of miserable surroundings and decided on a weird, dank, alice in wonderland themed motel room, which is a) something interesting to describe when I need space between dialogue and b) the ill-advised freaky looking murals of half-humanoid Wonderland characters is a reflection of how Castiel feels - not human enough, not Other enough, twisted out of shape and c) it 'reflects' (I'm about to do a pun) their relationship has gone 'through the looking glass' (teehee) from the understood 'brothers in arms' to a strange, uncertain place where the rules have changed.

Shaking Out The Nest John gets frustrated by Dean asking to visit Sam at college. "I talk a lot of shit, but [Sam]'s always gonna be family. He's..." the only reason I'm alive, same as you, John can't quite get to come out of his mouth, so instead he repeats, "He's good."

In the demon plane episode where it's revealed that John would rave about Sam getting a full scholarship to Stanford. I think about it SO MUCH. John loved his kids but that didn't make him a suitable parent. I wanted to explore those complicated emotions and the thought patterns that might lead him to what he does. Like I don't think it's deliberately thought out scheming malice that makes him say things that make Dean feel worthless. But he only sees him as a kid when he "fails" at being an "adult" (as in, when Dean disagrees with him) and he thinks it's his job as a parent to tell Dean to knock that off. He wouldn't see his reframing of Sam leaving to "He left both of us because of his pettiness" as playing them off against each other, even though he IS, he'd see it as telling the hard truth and trusting his son to be a grown up about it. John is very emotional and parenting just via your own emotions rather than being able to step back and go 'am I being fair? is this a reasonable response to what's actually happening?' leads to situations like John blaming Dean for the Schtriga incident or saying he should 'rot in jail' for stealing peanut butter.

Horny ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Close Zoom (too close) Dean and Cas make out for the first time while watching a movie. Cas gets overexcited. [Cas] replays the experience of holding Dean; the way his eyelids had fluttered shut with relief when their mouths first connected; the lean in by increments that ended with Dean on top of him....He wants to touch him. No, he amends the oft repeated thought, he wants to touch him again. 

I also wrote this inspired by going huh??? from another fic where they watch a movie together on a date on a first date and DON'T make out like. What are we doing here gang. If they are "watching a movie" and enjoy making out, then they ARE making out before the credits roll lmao. (In MY humble opinion!!!) Obviously chose The Mummy bc Dean's bisexual and I KNOW that man is showing Cas all his Formative To My Sexuality movies as a move to try and suss out what Cas's preferences are. The Lost Boys, Mr & Mrs Smith, Van Helsing, Labyrinth, Indiana Jones, Charlie's Angels, the list goes on.... Also my first installment with Cas having a bit of a pain kink (excited by the thought of a shock collar lol which I havvve been thinking about doing something more with.)

I have. by the way. a second work in progress where Cas gets wayyy more worked up than he was expecting and Dean is similar to here, slowing him down so it's not overwhelming, so look forward to it!!!!

Thunderstruck Cas has them struck by lightening while Dean sucks him off. HELL YEAH. Emanating from Castiel are intermittent bursts of white electric light, shocking across the black sky, sketching outlines of six invisible spread wings. That same light forms thin circular halos behind Cas’s head, some small, some so massive Dean can only see them in pieces. His eyes too - completely obscured by brilliant white light. He is radiant in all senses of the word. 

hehehehe. If your boyfriend can make it safe to be struck by lightening like you GOTTA do it just for the experience. I decided to have Dean not be like, blown away by it (but he is blown away by seeing a bit of trueform Cas) and instead find it just kind of weird but not bad to try and be true to life. sometimes you try something and don't love it or hate it and that's okay! Normal part of having sex. Sex is just another activity with lots of things you can do with it. That, and, it can't all be high points lol. That's why Cas is a little subdued when Dean says he only has 6 wings. peaks and valleys :)

The Feeling Is Enough Service top Dean :) "Cas - Cas, please...please can I come?" Cas doesn't say anything, just smiles up at him adoringly.

This one was bc @faithdeans lamented the lack of service top Dean destiel and I raced to his aid. Literally Dean would LOVE doing this.

Red Velvet Lines The Black Box Vampire!Dean sucking Cas's blood :) Cas is the only angel human enough to have workable blood.... And even if there were anyone else, Dean wouldn't want them. His is the only blood in Dean's veins.

This one was bc @domesticatedangel lamented the lack of vampire destiel smut and I raced to her aid. Castiel the rebel angel being horny over being given an order that he chooses to follow of his own volition? It's more likely than you think! The unmissable return of Castiel's pain kink lmao, even moreso in the second chapter. His penis! in peril!!!!!

The Girl Is Dead. Long Live The Woman. (Anna/Pamela*) Anna visits Pamela to find out what she wants and they have sex :) "I'm not used to - being part of things still. Being touchable. I didn't make the most of it, as a human. I didn't do enough. I was afraid. Embarrassed of my own feeling. I think I wasted my life."  "Be fair. You were a kid for most of it. You didn't know who you were." 

THIS one was because @honestlyhaunted lamented the lack of Pamela/Anna smut and I RACED to their aid. You may be noticing a theme. It's quite possible that if you sigh forlornly over a lack of erotica and I see it that something will be done about it. No promises though lol.

I tried to go for a more season 4 and 5 "everyone just fully states their unique moral philosophy out loud" vibe. And a "Pamela's disability actually affects her life in a practical way" vibe that the show itself elected to ignore. I DID get distracted a few times from my goal of "they have hot sex" because I got too invested in Anna's weird life. As I said in a comment response, Anna is the butterfly that wants to squash herself back into her cocoon. She went from being very emotionally present in her body as a human to having a very flat affect as an angel again (in part because she didn't feel the need to mask her autism anymore. Anna's autistic just like Cas and Hannah and people are not saying this!!!!). And, finally. I wanted a woman to have sex with a woman using a strap on because I hadn't done that yet LOL.

*If this ship was more prominent we could be calling it Pamelanna which is very fun to say.

The Dog, the Lamb and the Butcher Dean and Crowley are having sex during their summer of love and Cas is caught watching them >:3 Then again, fairness doesn't seem to be the watchword here. Dean's looking up at him with what could be adoration, but there's a wildness to him too, a sparkling mischief that undercuts any implied promise of loyalty.  "You like me, don't you Cas? You like me. Uhhn -" A groan born out of Crowley picking up the pace again, making Dean rock into the mattress, "You like me. You like me all the time, no matter what I do. You even like me now." 

Nobody asked for this I have no one to blame but myself. I love and adore the Dean who cannot speak his feelings no matter how much he wants to but there is always room in my heart for an overemotional Demon!Dean who says and does whatever he wants because he's lost the ability to care about the consequences. We could have had it alllllll.

Ask for it Cas caught casturbating by Dean. What happens next WON'T surprise you. His breathing is labored, and he's making quiet sounds of effort, which probably have something to do with the fact that his fingers are pushing in and out of the wet, open pussy between his legs. The pace doesn't slow at Dean's interruption, giving Dean ample time to absorb the image of Cas’s long fingers being swallowed to the last knuckle. 

I am asking here now. I am the one sighing forlornly. I don't CARE that there are already 232 accidental voyeurism destiel fics. MAKE MORE. SHOW ME MORE. SHOW ME MORE. I WANT TO READ MORE. MORE SHAMELESSLY SELF-PLEASURING CASTIEL AND/OR DEAN AND THEY DON'T HAVE A SOCIAL SCRIPT FOR THIS SITUATION SO THEY'RE JUST GOING ON INSTINCT AND THEIR INSTINCT IS TO BE CRAZY HORNY ABOUT IT. SHOW ME MORE!!!!!

Ahem. Or don't teehee. This was my most self indulgent smut (and that's really saying something!!!!). I highly recommend just fuckin going for it because it means I get to reread something all the time that is exactly suited to my tastes!! Hell yeah!!

Fluff :3 this is uwu-hat uwu've aww been uwu-ating fow :3

Pretty Wife Closeted to even himself genderqueer Dean inadvertently insists that he's Cas's wife. Neither of them are opposed! "I think I understand," Cas says, nodding to himself with his 'I got it' smile, "Yes. We are playing roles. I will 'take out the trash' while you 'sit there and look pretty'."

My kingdom for genderqueer dean. He's literally butch. Helloooo!!

Okay that's all for fluff. LOL. SORRY. I post most of my fluff directly to tumblr!!

Carefully Plotted!!! These are the big ones!!!!!!!! All three of these are "One of my best".

A Light Above Descending Cas gives Dean his Grace to calm his Mark of Cain rages. He assumes Dean doesn't remember what he tells him when he's being fed, so he allows himself to be kind. He assumes Dean would prefer that he quietly sacrifice his life for him. He assumes that he hasn't got any family left who love him. He's wrong. A rat gets what a rat gets, is the phrase that repeats in his head, although he can’t speak them over the pounding of his heart, a rat gets what a rat gets.

I have talked about this one at great length in my #cawis commentary tag so I will not reiterate here. Other than that I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo so so so so proud of it and I love it so much.

The Voice In My Earpiece Thinks You're An Idiot (Jo/Bela) JoBela heist fic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“If anyone touches you again, I will cut off their fingers.” The fierce darkness of the promise plunges into Bela’s stomach, like a punch. Nobody has ever made her a promise like that before. Not one she believed, anyway.  “Do you believe me?” “That would -” Bela clears her throat, finding her voice croaky - “That would blow our cover.” “I don’t care.”  She means it. Bela remembers what Jo said when they properly introduced themselves - “I make a promise, I keep it.”. Stupid, it is, to throw away their plans over a few moments of discomfort. Ridiculous. Childish. “Do you believe me?” Jo repeats, and Bela nods, jerky, unpracticed. “Yes.” She takes a breath, then says again, “Yes.”

They get the biggest quote because theyyy mean so much to meeeee. I'll probably do another cawis commentary on this at some point bc there are too many things I did on purpose to say them all here. For now: when the woman who's learned to never trust anyone comes to trust the woman who's never felt trusted. And they banter and have hot lesbian sex. ROMANCE.

In Case of Emergency S1 Faith!Dean gets a new roommate at the hospital who's weird and intense and unexplainable things happen to him at night. I wonder who it could beeeee surely no one who's significant to Dean!!! (It's S5 Cas when he did the angel banishing sigil on his own chest) One of the machines on the other side starts going crazy with noise just as the curtain is cast back in a dramatic swish. The shadow of a man looms, sinister and ominously silent. He's watching Dean, but Dean can't do the same, his face impossible to make out. A red light flashes off kilter to his head from his monitors, and Dean gets the absurd thought that it looks like a knocked off halo. 

You know it you love it it's In Case Of Emergency. I just think. They DON'T have a supernatural soulmate connection but they just get on as people. If they met at any time in each other's lives for the very first time (aside from Godstiel lol) they would end up getting along! They click! They LIKE each other!

I thought a lot about the Sam role in this fic. If you have 3 people and 2 of them want something (to hang out all the time) then the 3rd person SHOULD be getting in the way of that (closing the curtain) for a believable reason (Dean needs to rest and stop tiring himself out with this random stranger!!!). Sam comparing Dean's imminent demise to Mary's death and Dean eventually asking what he'd want Mary to say to him (with the subtext; what can I say to make it better that I'm dying) made me cry as I wrote it and every time I reread it. It's making me cry NOW lol. augh fuck im rereading i'm crying. turns out. when you write exactly what touches you emotionally. you feel touched. emotionally. to read it.

Also this fic now makes me think of darling @forestofsprites bc they've left such wonderfully kind tags every time they've reblogged it :') ily

Misc I dunno. These don't fit in the other categories lol.

6th Life's The Charm! Sarah Blake/Bela Meow!!!!! Sarah gets a mysterious commission to find a painting, and a strangely perceptive cat follows her home the same day. But those can't possibly be connected I'm sure. Smiling with her eyes closed, Sarah puts a hand on B's back and touches. Skin.  She startles awake and jerks her hand away. By the embers of the fire, she can see the woman lying on top of her....The woman is watching her, smiling, and her pupils are strange. They creep a little too far into her irises. She's also the most beautiful woman Sarah has ever seen. Stunning, in both senses of the word.  "No questions?" The woman asks eventually, as Sarah's silent stare ticks on. Her tone is a) British and b) faintly mocking, like she knows something Sarah doesn't. 

Little turned into a kitty cat romcom!! I do fun little asides in footnote format! Middle aged yaoi ummmm but what about middle aged YURI??? Sarah references Sex in the City and is having a midlife crisis what more do you want from me!!! I did want to have a little moment of Sarah saying "sorry about the collar attempt" and Bela flirtily going "hmm, I think it'd look better on you" and Sarah spontaneously combusting but it didn't quite flow. Maybe in the horny sequel I kinda want to write...

MEOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello, Sun In My Face Cas realises he's in love with Dean. The natural thing to do is to tell him right away. "Don't," Dean pleads, and it's not clear whether he means don't love me or don't tell me. Either way, Cas is going to let him down.  "I love you," Cas repeats, firmly, "I have loved you. I will love you. That's all."

Too angsty for the fluff section, too sweet for the tragedies. What are you. As may be clear from previous works, in MY world, Dean and Cas platonically sleep together every night and snuggle the whole time :3 even if it's a world where they're aromantic I firmly believe this would be the case. When I say platonic I am not saying it with a wink and a nudge, as a few scattered comments seem to suggest they think. But also in this one they are also romantically in love haha.

How Do You Go From Wanting To Having? When Cas stumbles back to life after escaping from the Empty, Dean can't speak the words in his heart. But he can write them. You can have it, and variations thereupon: You can have it, damn it; could have fucking taken me, asshole; what do you think is supposed to make me happy now, you arrogant, stupid son of a bitch?

I don't know if I made the most of this premise lol but I had fun building the evidence of grief into the Bunker. They pushed a heavy object in front of the door to the dungeon so they didn't have to see it, Dean filled his room with lights so he didn't have to be in the dark (a general post-canon headcanon of mine that both Dean and Cas have lamps on all night), Dean's stiff position during his nightmare. Little clues that Cas does NOT pick up on bless his heart.

This Is A Love That Lasts Forever It's about Claire giving Cas a haircut. It's about grief. It's about love. Cas remembers - though he shouldn't, ethically - sending Claire for a time out for saying the word 'damn' when she was 6, though she surely couldn't have known what it meant. Swinging her hand on the way to church on Sundays. Clapping for her awkward turn at playing Mary in the Christmas Nativity. Loving Claire had only deepened Jimmy's love of God, and this was the love that Castiel had taken advantage of. He doesn't deserve even a moment of Claire’s forgiveness. 

Last one! I uploaded this on the 29th of December but it ISSSSSS absolutely 1000% one of my best. Cas and Claire's relationship in canon is so WEIRD. One doesn't typically accept grumpy cats from the guy wearing your dad's corpse as a skin suit??? Even if he's kind of nice to you?? So this is my way of figuring out how to make it make sense. She can't ditch Cas because that's where all her dad's love is stored and nobody else in her life knows her dad anymore. And they both have to try and make that work.

I had a different ending in mind for a little while - Claire completing the haircut and then going oh my god. now you don't look like my dad anymore. what have I done now I won't remember him I'm so stupid!!! put it back how it was!! and Cas is like um I can't do that though I'm low on Grace and Claire cries herself out about it and they talk about having to get used to new, unfamiliar circumstances. But I like what I went with more (obviously. because I wrote it lol).

Little headcanons that I carried across from other works: - Claire will allow Donna to be as cutesy and affectionate as she likes and Donna calls her "Claire-bear" and nobody can figure out why it's a shy little happy smile when Donna pats her cheek and beams at her and she would kill anyone else who tried it with her laser eyes. I do though, I know why. It's bc of Donna's easy open affection that genuinely isn't trying to hide anything. Claire knows Donna isn't faking it because Donna is kind to everything and everyone. She would have a harder time with Garth though even though Donna and Garth are very similar in this regard, just because. Well. The girl has been traumatized and betrayed by so many "nice" men. God how did I get onto this. Donna is the mom/aunty figure Claire has needed for a long time. I talk about this in Growing A New Half Soul - Angel's were never children I talk about in A Light Above Descending.

THE END.

If you've read this. Are you sure you didn't have anything better to do with your time avhsbv but thank you!!! Go follow all the friends I've @'d because then they might do follower events and I might write more things as a result!!!! Also go and write some dean walking in on cas masturbating fic and then send it to me.

My challenge for you is to think about women falling in love with other women. Wow, beautiful, right? And also to think of ONE thing you did that you are proud of this year. Even and in fact especially if it's something you're not "supposed" to be proud of. Did you find something new you liked. Were you kind to someone. Were you kind to yourself when you didn't have to be. All these and more are things to take pride in.

I, for one, am proud of having written 111,227 words of complete short fiction!!!!! So much so that I wrote another 4936 words talking about them here :)

[thisisdefinitelyacreativename]

Are you hillay17? I've searched your pseudo, and this is the Tumblr that showed up.

Nearly every days, I visit the Edelgard tag unfiltered on AO3, witnessing in the process the come and go of hundreds of fic. But one day, as I was browsing my little AO3 tab like usual, a tittle caught my eye... "An evil wizard cursed my dick". I have read thousands of fic tittle before, tittle from all kinds of fic and I have to say none have made me laugh before. And damn, I must tell you that for someone who "Hates doing tags" you're pretty good at them, they certainly made me laugh too.

This could have ended there, a funny tittle with funny tags, but no. Time passed, and as the days went I continued my never ending exploration of this damned Edelgard tag. It wasn't fun, there's a lot of shit going on the Edelgard tag. It was a bit depressing, having to rummage through hundreds of "Burning kitten alive" fic of your favorite character, seeing torture and revenge rape of them, all just to find treasure buried under this ship wreck. But amongst this dark sea in merciless ocean of Archive of Your Own, there was a lighthouse: "An evil wizard cursed my dick". Everytime a chapter was uploaded I was there to see it, my innocent eyes reaching once again the sight of the blasphemous Ferdinand von Aegir/Sylvain Jose Gautier/Hubert von Vestra ( the latter would approve the usage of the term ). And it made me smile. It was just so nice, to see regularly a fanfic amongst it all that was was just fun... You cannot imagine my joy when you published that sequel. It's amazing how a simple fic description can make one laugh.

Amongst all this story I have to say that as an asexual lesbian who is not particularly into such thing as "Orgasm control" and "Spanking" ( no judgment though 🫡 ), I have never read your fics. And while admitably I am very tempted to do so now, I'm not sure I ever will. But I've to admit I think I really grew attached to them.

So from one of your non-reader, thank you, you're funny as hell ❤️

Honestly , there are quite a lot of sex scenes in this story so I completely understand the hesitation! But I'm sooooo happy to see you liked it in THEORY, and a little frightened that you found me on here even though I probably just linked it somewhere and forgot. I'm a little bit dumb like that.

But if you ARE into such a thing as this, readers, go check me out https://archiveofourown.org/users/hillay17

I'm gonna keep posting stuff about Edelgard in the future including a story involving her and Bernadetta that. Also has some kissing and some sex in it. BUT LESS KISSING AND SEX THAN THE OTHER ONE. Keep an eye out. Love u anon thank you for this it made my day

[jojotichakorn]

pun and beer :3

closing off the we are characters headcanons with these two, let's goooo

choose a character and ask about my headcanons here, if you like

PUN

🏳️‍🌈 a sexuality headcanon

pan (no pun intended x2).

🏳️‍⚧️ a gender headcanon

he gives me kind of "i'm probably not 110% a man, but that's none of my business" vibes jlfkgjkdfjglfkd

🧸 a headcanon about their childhood

unfortunately, i think some other kids definitely found him very weird and bullied him :( thankfully, like i mentioned in my post with chain headcanons, i think he and pun have been friends since they were very little, so chain was always there to protect him.

👻 a headcanon about what scares them

honestly, most things. if you jump out from a corner at him and say "boo", he will scream.

🎶 a headcanon about music

for some reason he gives me the vibes of someone who mostly listens to iconic pop stars both from the 90s-00s and current ones. he's like a britney spears and charlie xcx girlie (gender-neutral).

👽 a headcanon about a weird quirk of theirs

finally i can say it! i think, by some string of fate, he also collects plushies. but it's not bears, maybe rabbits or something.

💤 a headcanon about their sleep

he loves sleep. he would sleep literally 24/7 if he could.

🦾 a disability headcanon

autism <3

💝 a headcanon about their love language

he is so quiet about it in general that it's hard to say, but i'm gonna choose quality time. it kind of feels like spending time with chain is already enough for him.

🫂 a friendship headcanon

pun and phum are future best friends!

💔 an angsty headcanon

even though we don't see much of it, he is like... seriously distressed about liking chain. he gets really anxious about it sometimes and is really afraid someone will find out, because he is very scared of losing their friendship.

🪢 a headcanon about their family

i think at least one of his parents is diagnosed autistic, and he's had a pretty supportive and comfortable environment at home thanks to that.

📓 a headcanon about their hobbies

he writes fanfiction. also reads fanfiction. his hobby is fanfiction.

🌟 a headcanon about their desires/wishes

i do think that he daydreams about chain reciprocating his feelings from time to time. he's run about five thousand scenarios of how that might happen in his head. and that's his secret big wish.

🥇 a headcanon about what they’re best at

genuinely organising people. being a leader. he might be silly, but he can get people together and really motivate them to do something for a cause.

🍫 a headcanon about food

he loooooves food and would eat almost anything.

❤️‍🔥 a romantic headcanon

he is a little insane about romance, i will not lie. he has seen every single romantic movie and series under the sun. he would do the silliest but also most romantic things for his partner for sure.

😺 an animal related headcanon

he loves all animals, but feels especially partial to anyone, who gets overlooked or is actively hated. he would not let you kill a single spider. cup-and-paper method only!

😭 a headcanon about the worst thing that happened to them

from his pov, falling in love with chain :( as much as he daydreams, he often wishes he would just love him as a friend.

😶 a random headcanon!

one of his favourite movies is 'emma.' (2020). the main character constantly tries to play matchmaker and ends up marrying her best friend. actually, now that i think about it, he might have also read the novel by jane austen the movie is based on and loves that as well.

BEER

🏳️‍🌈 a sexuality headcanon

bi (none of those boys are straight istg).

🏳️‍⚧️ a gender headcanon

a cis boy.

🧸 a headcanon about their childhood

he was really upset about losing contact with phum, when he was sent away, but his parents never let him call overseas, because it was too expensive, and he wasn't really allowed to use the internet either. he asked fang how phum was doing, whenever they crossed paths, though.

🫂 a friendship headcanon

he is the type of person to have multiple best friends and really just wear his heart on his sleeve with people who are close to him.

🪢 a headcanon about their family

he has strict parents and one younger sibling.

📓 a headcanon about their hobbies

he also loves photography. that's something that helped him and phum reconnect, when he returned, as they discovered it separately.

🥇 a headcanon about what they’re best at

he gives me the vibes of someone, who is really good at math.

😺 an animal related headcanon

huge dog person.

😶 a random headcanon!

he's gonna be in a relationship by the end of the series. with who, i have not decided. but he will.

[strongheartneteyam]

soooo.... I kinda hate to say it but I'm not sure if I'm gonna post Realize where you belong Part 2, guys... I have the first 4 or 5 (I don't recall) chapters of the second part of the story saved and I just need to edit them and add some parts but honestly? Writing fanfiction is like... at the bottom of my list of priorities right now. I've been really busy and exhausted with little to almost no free time because of my studies, my small business, because I also got into a serious relationship with the most amazing and adorable man and I'd just rather spend my time with him and my pets and my family and living life itself, instead of writing a life for my characters while I lay on my bed lol don't get me wrong, I love writing, but right now I'm totally focused on other things. I've been reading some fics every now and then but mostly, I've been studying and that has been helping me feel much better than if I started to write/post fics again. The future is unpredictable and I am an unpredictable person, at least when it comes to when I write/post n when I don't. I'm an infp, I just go with the flow of my own being <3 That being said, don't be sad, my loves, if you read and love Realize where you belong. I know a lot of you do. I see you guys interacting with this story and many others that I've written. There's a high chance that I'll finish the chapters I have and post them one day. But I can't say for sure. A plot twist happened in my life, per se. A great one ahaha And I find myself obligated to focus primarily on me, my pets, my studies + work, my family and my boyfriend right now. I'd love to be able to keep writing for you guys but right now is just not the time. I'm happy where I am. I feel peaceful and strong despite a thousand challenges I face every day. I just love this new era of me and even if I am scared of the unknown, I am so excited to just explore the world around me as well. Thank you all for everything you guys have given me until now. I may start writing for you guys again at any time. Who knows? lol but right now, I'll be doing other stuff :)

[myspacepoet]

Go OFF I wanna hear about this au 👀👀👀

HI ANON. um this is gonna be a long one.

so basically its a dnd inspired fantasy au, with the party as their dnd characters, classes pulled from this post , definitely didn't have to scrounge through my save blog for that, by @/elekinetic, if they didn't already have them. because it's real and true.

basest plot outline i can possibly give you is as follows; as young children all of the members of the party were Marked somehow for Evil and Villainous purposes, or perhaps Good and Benevolent purposes, but it stands that they marked. (by whom? well. tch. heh.) this mark comes with this innate.. pull? i guess? to the other members, but not strong enough to be noticeable, more of a seeing the others and thinking "oh! there you are! i've been looking for you!" despite never meeting before. the group starts as mike and will finding each other, before it all kinda spirals and they form a little adventuring party, led to their next destination by their faithful cleric, who alongside the original pull, feels another drawing them all to wherever the universe decides they Need To Be.

that's like. the concept i guess? i really don't want this to run too long so i'm putting more ideas and villainy and art and such under the cut :-D be warned i hate most punctuation and i love to ramble.

OK SO. first of all edward and henry are twins so jot that down. something Terrible and Unspeakable happens to the rest of their family when they're like 12ish and they run for the hills, eventually stumbling upon the mansion dwelling of a reclusive and moderately to severely insane mad... scientist? not entirely sure what brenners fantasy world equivalent profession would be. anyway yeah its brenner the twins are tricked duped swindled and had until theyre locked in his basement and become his newest experiments.

brenner is basically training them to be his guard dogs/weapons of mass destruction and is doing. canon typical things to them. until henry's like hey maybe you're right the world kinda does suck but id be sad if it all burned to the ground :-( i don't see how that's helping. (this is possibly spurred on by a spot of creelarke and scott chilling in gardens and teaching him that not all science is bad and mean and also that brenner is kinda full of shit) and for this grave crime he is locked in the attic.

vague handwavy magic plot bullshit (motives? where were going we dont need motives) blah blah edward has Marked/Cursed the party members woah oh noo!!!

this is mostly a vehicle to think really hard about fantasy byler and lumax and pre-UD-esque henry interacting with the party through their dreams to aid their Great Quest so try not to breath on it too hard. it may or may not fall apart.

OK ART YIPPEE YAHOO LETS GO

side note i know jack shit about dnd races and quite frankly do not care. i said dnd inspired not dnd were going TYPICAL FANTASY RACES ONLY I'M TALKIN ELVES HUMANS DWARVES AND SHIT ELSE.

they all have a more casual outfit for downtime and one for traveling and/or battling etc etc. you get the gist. dustin and lucas aren't done yet and you'd have to take drastic measures to get me to do anything other than type rn.

also have some doodles bc i like you :-) ft. a henry and miwi's first meeting.

i have way more thoughts (particularly regarding max and mikes backstories and mikes oath and 8 thousand other things). but i don't wanna be annoying.

final thing is that for extra credit you are welcome to listen to the moon will sing by the crane wives and think about this au's henry okay byyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee (slowly fading away)

[linskywords]

Ooh for ask meme. 2, 9, and 13!

2. Is there a trope you’ve yet to try your hand at, but really want to?

Ooooh I'm having trouble coming up with one. I've done most of the tropes that hit most squarely on my id. I'm not sure I've done proper fake dating? But I've done fake marriage, so that might be close enough. I really want to finish a story I started a while back where Mitch Marner is genderqueer such that they're sometimes in what would stereotypically be considered a male body and sometimes a female one -- it might not a trope per se in that I don't think I've seen it in other stories (though ao3 contains multitudes so who knows), but it's a really compelling story element to me and I'd love to continue exploring it.

9. Which fic has been the hardest to write?

Demisexual Jamie, hands down. I kept coming back to that one for yeeeeears before I finally managed to write more than the first few thousand words. It's one of the stories that's nearest to some of my own life experiences, and my initial ideas for it weren't quite fic-shaped. But I'm so glad I pushed through. It means a lot to me to have written it.

13. What’s the best writing advice you’ve ever come across?

Oh goodness. I'm gonna give three answers here.

First, I think a lot about Speranza's advice to just keep swinging -- I'm having trouble finding the original post about it, but it's basically it's easy to be afraid that, sure, maybe the last thing you wrote was good, or the thing five stories ago, maybe people really liked that one, but what if you never write anything good again? What if you're afraid you never wrote anything good in the first place? Her response is that not every at-bat is going to be a home run, but that's okay -- it's still a good game of baseball even if you occasionally hit a single or a double or even strike out. And you'll never get home runs if you don't step up to swing at all.

My second favorite piece of writing advice is from C.S. Pacat, author of the Captive Prince trilogy. This post does a good job of summing up her takes on tension and emotional repetition, and I think I read her talking elsewhere about how you have to spend a lot of time building tension so that you'll have something to burn later on. The more firewood you pile up, the bigger the blaze.

Finally -- and Pacat touches on this a bit when she talks about catharsis -- a thing I think a lot about in writing, and especially in editing: hold back. Hold back on the emotions. In a writing group about ten years ago someone told me that if the character is crying, the reader probably isn't, and while I don't quite agree with that, I do think that if the character is crying and it isn't 1000000% justified and in character you've probably lost the reader. This goes for lots of emotions. People don't need to smile as much or laugh as much in our writing as we often think they do. If you include one smile too few, no one's going to assume an evil glare, but if you include one smile too many, it really quickly starts to cross the line into corny and fake. There are a few things at play here:

Restrained emotions feel more powerful. If someone wants to be crying but isn't, there's power there. If they want to be crying and they do, that's catharsis -- and that kills your emotional tension. (Side note: I love how Naomi Novik handles this in Scholomance, where the kids go through hell and have to learn to cry with their eyes open so they don't miss a potential danger. Intense emotion AND restraint.)

Trusting the reader. Your readers don't forget that your characters like each other; they don't have to smile every other line for that to still be true. Your readers understand when something sucks for the character; they don't need to see tears to believe it, and if they don't already believe it, the tears won't help. Readers hate being treated as stupider than they are. Trust your readers, and trust yourself that you've communicated what you want to in the scene.

Emotional/character realism. You do not want your character reacting in ways that don't feel realistic for the person they are in the context you've put them in. Tears from a character are hard to earn -- especially from a hockey guy like I tend to write. Similarly, when something's emotionally important, most people aren't going to come out and say it (even if they aren't an emotionally stunted hockey boy). If someone just comes out and says their truth, I'm going to assume it's not that meaningful to them. If they deny it or struggle to say it or talk around it, that makes it all feel much more real. If they cry too easily, if they get angry over nothing, if they laugh at something that isn't funny -- same problem.

There are usually more interesting and character-specific ways to show emotion. I just reread Rainbow Rowell's Attachments, and there's a great scene where the POV character learns that a thing he's been trying not to hope for is not in fact going to happen, and he doesn't sit there and cry. He trashes the email he learned it in, trashes the entire email account, and gets up and quits his job (it's a good thing in context). It's a much more specific reaction that shows the depths of his emotions while not lingering in them, and also while moving the story forward. (Also I'm totally not doing the story justice and you should all read Attachments -- it's basically pining fic, I've read it like 12 times.)

The upshot is that I spend a lot of time while editing taking things out. Over-the-top displays of emotions. Lines I thought I needed. It involves a lot of trusting the story to have done the work already, and sometimes I'm sure I miss the mark, but it's better for a reader to miss a nuance than to feel like they've been hit in the face with unearned emotion.

ask meme

[likehalfofuswillmakeitidk]

I'm going to post this everyday until you like it Date: Pre-collapse - Unknown Author - Anonymous

The internet was a mechanism by which the synapses of humanity, usually constrained by physical space, were directly connected. This allowed for both an increased understanding between countries and cultures, and an increased stratification between the normal and the deviant.

The burgeoning communities of weirdos on the internet were, at best, derided and mocked, and at worst, beaten down and deleted. Some of these places deserved it, many of them didn't. Some that deserved it didn't even get hit.

One thing often not touched on by the ostensibly 'sane' is the profound loneliness in the varying levels of psychosis. For those whose perception of reality deviates from the norm the human mechanisms that seeks consensus and understanding usually remain intact. "I see it too", what a weight off my chest those words would be.

The internet probably saved thousands of lives in this regard. Walking around your little rural town you might never find anyone like you. But weighed against the infinity of the internet and the teeming mass of humanity contained within that infinity, well eventually you were gonna find someone as strange as you, someone who can see it too, whatever it is that you see.

"I'm going to post this everyday until you like it". Attached, an image of a girl with purple hair, biting into a fish. A stupid post in a stupid place.

"I like it, what's not to like about it?"

"I HATE it"

"Sakura a shit"

Somehow, it instantly tapped in. Anyone that was there at that time had nowhere better to be, and this post, this promise, it clicked.

And every day it came back. Because it had to. Because who was "you" anyways? The royal You, out of every single person who saw the post all it took was one person to cross their arms and say "no! i don't like it!" and it would be back.

And every day it was posted, again and again and again.

Of course no one actually hated it. We all took turns, one day you LOVED it, the next you HATED. And even if someone really did hate it all they did by saying so was play into the game.

It was a game of nonsense, but the urgency of rushing into a thread just before it fell off the board and throwing in a "I don't like it!!!!!!!" was like you had the defibrillators to another nothing day with the most unpleasant people you would never meet.

Sorry if you don't know what a defibrillator is. As you might imagine, the gap between you and me goes beyond the chasm of time.

It took years for whoever was doing it to be banned. It's hard to explain to you, just know that some stick in the mud with a tiny amount of power didn't like it, and the posting stopped.

But every once in a while it would pop up again, and the dwindling few who remembered would flock to the threads to post all the same things and mourn the fact that we didn't miss something until we knew that we'd never see it again.

I'm sure your historians have written eulogies for our internet by now. I would like to contribute a bit to that historiography if that's ok:

We had fun on the internet, me and so many other deviant, disgusting, reprehensible dipshits had so much fun. They said we would be there forever, I still am there now, there is nowhere else for me to be.

I walk around my small town, people are friendly, kind, resilient, I write this down because I know that someone will read it someday, and it won't be because of me, it'll be because of them.

But it's so lonely. And I can't let it end like this. Unfinished. So here's my contribution, an ending to a world in which we belonged, not out of a sense of community, but out of a sense of displacement.

I'm Going To Post This Everyday Until You Like It

And I like it. I really do.

[troopingfairy]

[ID: A series of images displaying text in all caps and tweets on a black background.

(First image) Israeli settlers cannot be heroes

(Second image) Israeli settlers refusing to serve in the IOF is the bare minimum

(Third image) There is no such thing as:

→ the israeli 'left' → 'pro-Palestine' israelis → 'good' settlers

Settlers are by definition violent

(Fourth image) Any arguments painting settlers favorably are zionist distractions

(Fifth image) Tweets

d 𓂆 @/normalarab (posted on 26 Dec 2023)

"the israeli left" oh rly where did they go

Sa'eed Jiddan @/mish_aderr (posted on 13 Dec 2023)

There is no "leftist" settler colonialism don't let white people gaslight you with their biblical fantasies in Palestine.

sipping on that 🇵🇸 @/vivafalastin (posted on 26 Dec 2023)

israelis acting like they get to decide what counts as allyship to palestinians… i have really seen it all on this cursed app

(Sixth image) Tweets

Jun 🇵🇸🔻 @/liked by cats (posted on 24 Dec 2023)

As soon as you start patting israelis on the back for protesting genocide is when you've totally lost me

sarah hagi @/KindaHagi (posted on 26 Dec 2023)

yeah i'm sorry but when there are 20k people killed, thousands more injure, people being killed of starvation i am not gonna get excited about israelis protesting — we are FAR past that being impressive

(Seventh image) Tweets

Rawan‏𓂆☭ روان @/RiverToSea48 (posted on 26 Dec 2023)

Anybody telling Palestinians to care that joining the IOF is mandatory for Israelis (for the 554356th time at that, as if we haven't noticed) is engaging in Nazi apologist logic of Just Following Orders as far as I'm concerned

Rawan‏𓂆☭ روان @/RiverToSea48 (posted on 26 Dec 2023)

Incredibly obnoxious when someone who heard about Palestine yesterday acts like they're telling us something new here, Palestinian children are aware of what iof conscription is, we all know their whole society is built on this oppressive rite of passage

(Eighth image) Tweets

*vague screaming* 🇵🇸 @/Ruth_Mensch (posted on 27 Dec 2023)

I feel like we're seeing something now with Palestine that I have always hated about depictions of the Holocaust in media - the insistence on the "good German" being front and center. See Schindler's List, etc. Repeatedly, only Palestinians can dictate what allyship looks like.

𓂆 حلا @/hotgirlhala (posted on 27 Dec 2023)

"so heroic! he's paying for it with prison time!" tells me that if given the choice to either sit in a prison or commit genocide against Palestinians, some of you would have a hard time deciding

(Ninth image) Tweets

Jennine @/lilearthquakess (posted on 27 Dec 2023), quote retweeting sipping on that 🇵🇸 @/vivafalastin

Look at all the angry replies form people delusional enough to think they are in solidarity with Palestinians.

80 days of the most sick, depraved, accelerated genocide in modern history and western left is still deeply uncomfortable with any suggestion that settlers are settlers

The quoted tweet by sipping on that 🇵🇸 @/vivafalastin says:

i find it genuinely ludicrous that people think it's heroic to refuse joining an occupying army. is it unfortunately not the norm, and therefore brave? sure. but heroic? good lord, is the bar so low?

sarah hagi @/KindaHagi (posted on 27 Dec 2023)

you guys are so sick for speaking over and tone policing palestinians/muslims. caring about palestine for some of you is limited to theory and intent and it couldn't be clearer how divorced you are from the concept of survival. lemme tell you we don't forget this shit

(Tenth image) Tweets

Tameem | تميم @/TameeOliveFern (posted on 27 Dec 2023)

I suspect many non-Palestinians heroise IOF refusers because they think refusers are imaginary decolonisation magic wan which absolves everyone else from actually doing anything about the genocide

Mohammad @/MargBarAmerica (posted on 27 Dec 2023)

these bullshit discourses like "some genocides are worse than others" or "refusing conscription is/isn't praiseworthy" are just pointless distractions, most the time people are arguing completely different things, having dead end philosophical debates, can u guys focus

/end ID]

some things to keep in mind as we’re seeing some israelis refuse to serve in the iof and people applauding them for it, as if that’s not the least they can do (thread from @/annarajagopal on ig)

[xynchronicity]

Felt the need to find some songs for Siren and/or The Others so...oop 👀 This is a long post btw... 😅

Siren:

Surface Pressure - Encanto

Pressure, like a drip, drip, drip that'll never stop, whoa Pressure that'll tip, tip, tip 'til you just go pop, whoa, oh, oh Give it to your sister, your sister's older Give her all the heavy things we can't shoulder Who am I if I can't run with the ball? If I fall to Pressure like a grip, grip, grip, and it won't let go, whoa Pressure like a tick, tick, tick 'til it's ready to blow, whoa, oh, oh Give it to your sister, your sister's stronger See if she can hang on a little longer Who am I if I can't carry it all? If I falter Under the surface I hide my nerves, and it worsens, I worry something is gonna hurt us Under the surface The ship doesn't swerve as it heard how big the iceberg is Under the surface I think about my purpose, can I somehow preserve this?

Towards Eternity

Everything you had fought for Slowly faded away in your hate If you could see her once more Would you tell her it's not too late? Follow your destiny Resting eternally Go to your destiny Sleeping eternally If you are caught in the final silence Do you see? You are there where you wanna be If you are caught in the dark and can't get out Listen now, you are lost, better take a bow

The Others:

Dream - Imagine Dragons

In the dark And I'm right on the middle mark I'm just in the tier of everything That rides below the surface And I watch from a distance seventeen And I'm short of the others dreams Of being golden and on top It's not what you painted in my head There's so much there instead of all the colors that I saw Oh, we all are living in a dream But life ain't what it seems Oh, everything's a mess And all these sorrows I have seen They lead me to believe That everything's a mess But I wanna dream I wanna dream Leave me to dream I know all your reasons To keep me from seeing Everything is actually a mess But now I am leaving All of us were only dreaming Everything is actually a mess

Both:

Unravel From Tokyo Ghoul

I look in the mirror and see but a stranger Our images are intertwined, but both of us are left behind Unbreakable, yet breakable Unstable, yet unshakable I won't let you be corrupted I'm slowly but surely fading away to nothing My twisted existence is surely something that I can't escape So please just turn away… I'd hate to harm you This life wasn't made for the weak and helpless And bringing you into this would be so senseless So all that I plead is you remember me as who I was before this Please don't forget me Please don't forget me, please don't forget me, oh don't forget me

Song of The Abyss - Aviators

I will shield you from the darkness When the walls around us quake I will hold back all the monsters Until my bones begin to break When I've lost I'll have to leave you And the tears, they'll fall like rain If I'm taken by the shadows I will spare you from the pain Foolishly I left the darkness creeping In this restless ruin my soul is bleeding I confess to you the dark Has taken me prisoner I am corrupt beyond any rescue I've forsaken my vow to protect you Oh, end these horrors Face the father of the sinister If the fight's over I will sacrifice my mind Just to know you'll still be breathing When the years have been unkind So continue on without me Guard my body and my flame Keep a watch over the wasteland When the world forgets my name

Never Enough

I'm trying to hold my breath Let it stay this way Can't let this moment end You set off a dream with me Getting louder now Can you hear it echoing? Take my hand Will you share this with me? 'Cause darling without you All the shine of a thousand spotlights All the stars we steal from the nightsky Will never be enough Never be enough Towers of gold are still too little These hands could hold the world but it'll Never be enough Never be enough For me Never, never Never, never Never, for me For me Never enough Never enough Never enough For me For me For me

Glassy Sky - Tokyo Ghoul

Glassy sky above As long as I'm alive, you will be part of me Glassy Sky - the cold, the broken pieces of me The mystery of it I recall Suddenly the truth will change the way we fall I didn't wanna hurt you, hope you know Empty promises, shattered dreams of love Sometimes I wonder what's beyond I tried many times to make it up to you Can somebody tell me what to do? I thought we're meant to be, but there's no looking back Time has already come The sun is gone - no more shadows Can't give up, I know, and this life goes on I'll be strong I'll be strong 'Til I see the end Inside I've been shaken, my sanity taken Our broken halves, they intertwine From once was yours and once was mine

Honorary mention for them both but mostly The Others:

Childish War

[neochan]

GENRE | smut, idolverse!

WARNINGS | smut

WC | 2.6k +

A.N | this is a repost of my older work. i hope you enjoy it <3

You could still hear the unintelligible screaming of thousands of fans as the boys filtered off the stage and into the greenroom. Another successful concert in the long string of tour stops. You couldn’t even remember what state you were in because the days of traveling, unpacking, setting up, and doing it all again the next day ran together.

The boys were dripping sweat, immediately grabbing bottles of water and towels to wipe themselves off. They had worked harder than normal today since during one of the sets the microphone cut out and they had to perform acapella. Someone was getting fired for that.

Taeyong flopped onto the leather couch dominating the center of the room, water in one hand, phone in the other. “People are already uploading photos.” He outstretches his arm so the others could view the pictures pulled up on his screen.

“Johnny you look ridiculous,” you point out, laughing as a fan had caught Johnny in the act of wildly waving his light stick.

“I was having a good time, okay?” He chuckles and walks into the dressing rooms to change out of his stage outfit. Half of the group filtered out to change and half stayed to peruse through the gifts left by venue staff and play on their phones until told otherwise.

You were wondering where Hyuck was when you heard his voice from the hallway. He saunters in and gives you a kiss on the cheek, “Enjoy the show?” His golden skin was tainted pink, hair matted to his forehead by the sweat that was trickling down the side of his face. He grabbed his shirt and lifted it to swipe at his face, revealing his cute tummy. You had to resist the urge to poke it.

“I enjoyed hearing thousands of pretty fans scream your name” You give him a smirk knowing that he hates when you downplay your relationship.

He nudges you with his shoulder, “You know I meant the songs,” his doe eyes look into yours, his long lashes brushing against his cheek when he blinked “Besides, you know I love you and only you.”

Mark began to nervously giggle in the corner while Doyoung made fake gagging noises from the vanity he sat at. “Oh, shut up.” You say, throwing empty water bottles at the two, “And hurry up I wanna go swimming before it gets too late.”

The ride home was peaceful once the swarms of fans cleared a path for the bus. Per the managers request you slouched down in your seat so know one could see you through the window. It didn’t make much sense because the windows were tinted, but Haechan had to argue for his life to allow them to let you tag along on the tour, so you didn’t question them. Once you were on the road, you sat back up and snuggled close to Haechans side. He rested his hand on your thigh, absentmindedly stroking you with his thumb. His head leaned back against the seat, eyes closed, listening to music. It was so loud you could almost make out the words but you didn’t say anything – you let him stay in his post concert utopia for the whole trip.

The hotel was about an hour away from the venue so that no one would find them, and they’d be closer to their next destination. It was nicer than the others because it actually had a pool. You and Haechan made an agreement to go swimming after the concert, and you couldn’t wait. The staff also rented more rooms, so instead of four people to a bed, it was just you and Haechan.

After checking in everyone filtered off to their rooms leaving the both of you to freely do whatever you wanted - within reason of course. You both got changed, your gaze admiring the hard lines of Haechans back. “Don’t stare.” He blushed, wrapping a towel around his upper body.

You pulled on your bikini which made Haechan go silent. You specifically picked this one because it brought out your skin tone well, and cupped your features beautifully. “Now who’s staring?”

It never failed. The butterfly feeling you got in the pit of your stomach when Haechan watched you with loving eyes. You wrapped a towel around your waist, allowing Haechans eyes to roam the tops of your breasts, peeking out from the almost too small bathing suit.

His cheeks turned pink once he noticed he was caught, “Let’s go”.

The hallways were quiet since it was almost midnight, so you wordlessly made your way down the stairs and out into the night air. It had grown considerably cooler than when guys first arrived that morning, but the sky made up for it. Pretty stars pricked the vast expanse of dark blue and black infinity. You could see the moon peaking out from behind a single cloud, casting a shadowed glow on Haechans honey skin.

The gate was closed when you walked up to it so you stopped to read, “Aw man, the pool closed an hour ago,” You set your lips in a pout, “no wonder the lights weren’t on.”

“Hey it’s okay, no lights, no cameras, they probably wont even notice we’re here if we keep quiet.” He moves closer to you, eyebrows raised expectant for an answer.

You hesitated wondering if you really could pull it off, after all you’d been looking forward to this for the whole day, “I don’t wanna get in trouble..”

“You said you wanted to swim and I’m going to make sure that happens,” He gets down on one knee, “step on my leg, I'm gonna help you jump the fence.”

He boots you over, and grabs your arms to help lower you on the other side, but his hand slips and his nails dig into your shoulder. “Ow, fuck.” You wince rubbing the spot he scratched.

“Sorry, sorry” He says giggling, jumping the fence with such quietness and ease that it looked unreal. “Come on, dare you to do a canon ball!?”

He ran ahead throwing his towel on one of the pool chairs and jumping in the water. You cringe away from the loud slap his body hitting the water made. You walk slowly to the chair, deeply inhaling the addictive chlorine scent.

He finally stands up waist deep in the water and pushes his hair back. The blue water reflected against him, making his skin sparkle. “Come into the water y/n” he splashed some water into your general direction, but not enough to touch you.

“Okay, Okay.” You drop the towel and slip into the water. It was cold. Really cold. You gasp and recoil away, but not fast enough, because Haechan has wrapped his arms around you and started carrying you towards the deep end. You struggle a bit in his grip but his arms provide an iron cage that you can’t get out of. “Haechan let me go!”

He presses a warm kiss to the back on your neck but doesn’t comply with your wishes, instead making a curve and bringing you towards the underwater benches. He fixes his hold on you so that now he’s carrying you bridal style. You stare up at him, water droplets falling off his chin. His eyes were already red from the chlorine and you hoped that it cleared up by tomorrow nights concert. His plush lips sat in a pout, strong jaw set. He was so very pretty; and all yours. You smiled to yourself, deciding to keep that image locked away in your memory forever.

Once he gets to the benches he sets you down and glides in beside you. “You know It’s colder than I thought it was going to be.” He lifts a hand and sheepishly rubs the back of heck, “and you look way hotter in that bikini than I thought you would.”

“I don’t know if that’s supposed to be a dig or a compliment.” You scoot closer to him so that your thighs were pressed against each other. Finding his hand underwater, you intertwine your fingers with his own.

“A compliment babe.” He chuckles and slouches in the water so that only his head sat above it. You both sit there for a moment until it becomes too cold to sit still.

“Well I’m going to put it to use and go swim.” You push off from the cement and paddle around. The only way to stay slightly warm was to keep moving. Haechan watched you, eyes crinkled in a smile, bottom lip caught between his teeth. It was fun to watch you play in the water but the bathing suit was making him think of other things you two could be doing.

And that was how it stayed. Haechan watching while you performed for him.

A while had passed, the calm exterior of the pool getting to you, making you drowsy. The cold blue water washed over your hands while you gently skimmed the surface, making your way over to where Haechan was. You hummed a short tune under your breath, trying to keep yourself distracted. it was close to one in the morning now, but Haechan still sat on the bench, slightly shivering from the brisk air, hands gripping his thighs under the water while his mind wandered far away from the present.

“Watcha thinkin’ about” you ask, moving closer to him, hoping to catch some lingering body warmth.

“Fucking you ,” he moved off the seat and dove under the surface, only leaving small ripples in his wake. You stand there for a second wonder how he could be so blunt, so forward in his desires; he was never like this.

He swam a single circle around your body before popping up in front of you, giving you a mini heart attack. He pushes you back against the tiled walls, “I’ve spent the last hour thinking about fucking you. Thinking about how pretty you’d sound.” His head dips down to kiss along your collarbone, and your hands grab the back of neck, holding him there while his tongue sucked bruises into your tender skin. His hands grazed the bare skin of your arms, giving you goosebumps.

He moaned into the side of your neck, biting and sucking away, wanting you to yearn for him like he did for you. He lifted his head so that his mouth hung over yours, his small puffs of breath fanning over your face while he tests the waters. “Can I kiss you?”

Without giving him an answer you pull him closer by the roots of his hair. His kissing was messy and sweet, and while your tongues moved together, his hips began rubbing circles against you, trying to gain some friction in the cool water. Small heavy breaths were the only sound you could hear, aside from the occasional splash as Haechan moved restlessly.

Your hand wandered down his chest and below the surface to where you could feel him straining against his shorts. You began to stroke him over the fabric, his hips pushing against your touch. He broke the kiss to watch as you peeled down the elastic from his hips, his cock freed from the restricting material of his swim shorts. You watched him twitch slightly as the cold water met his length.

“You can’t make any noise.” You place a single finger against his lips.

“No promises.” He whispers, a devilish smirk breaking way on his face. His hands caress you thighs, pushing your bottoms to the side. The cold water hit you, making you gasp and push into Haechan who just whimpers against your touch.

He tried to stay quiet, only soft grunts between gritted teeth and muffled moans as his hips pushed into your own. The water created resistance but it just enhanced how good he was feeling. He hurriedly grabs at your legs, pulling them up so that they sat around his waist. Your back dragged up the tiled walls, scraping your tender skin, but you could only focus on Haechans cock thrusting deeply in and out of you. He stared longingly into your eyes, filling you up completely, wanting to savor the way they fluttered in the back of your head.

“You love the way I fill you up huh?” He groans into your ear, a hand falling forward to grip the cement ledge of the pool.

You couldn’t respond without fear of moaning so you nod your head wildly. He began to bite and suck at your collarbone, pushing you closer to the edge. Looking down he sees your nipples, erect, poking through the wet fabric of your bathing suit. His eyes grow wide, hips stuttering into you. Fuck you were hot.

“Haechannie, I think I’m going to come.” You squeezed your eyes shut trying to focus on the feeling coiling in your stomach.

“Not yet.” He growls, hands moving to pin your wrists against the cement ledge, “Hold it princess, I know you can.” The water began to slosh around faster as Haechan thrusted harder into you. The sound was so loud its no wonder you didn’t hear the keys jangling against the hip of the guard making his way towards you two.

“Hey!,” he shouts running towards you, “The pool is closed! Get out! Are you two-” He didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence as you and Haechan spring up out of fear and take off. It was easy to push yourself up onto the pool deck. The guard made the mistake of following you two and leaving the gate unattended. You and Haechan ran out, giggling, making your way back into the hotel. You didn’t stop until you got into the room and slammed the door behind you.

With your heart hammering in your chest you lean against the dark cherry wood . “Holy fuck we could’ve gotten in serious trouble.” You gasp out, clutching a hand against your wet bathing suit top.

“Babe we’ll be gone by morning, no one is gonna know.” Haechan paces in front of you trying to catch his breath. His shorts hung dangerously low on his hips, it was miracle he got them up in time.

“We’re so banned from this hotel.” A knock on the door makes you jump away from it, the worst of punishment's filling your mind. What were they going to do? They couldn’t arrest you, could they?

Haechan walks forward and turns the knob slowly, revealing a sleepy Doyoung. His oversized t-shirt hung off one shoulder showing off his gaunt collarbone. He was rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“What do you want Doie?” you ask softly.

“How was getting chased by the guard?” he gives a sleepy chuckle, still half in his dreams.

“How did you-,” A look of realization hits Haechan, “You reported us?” He whined, pushing Doyoungs bare shoulder so that he stumbled back.

“Sound travels over water dumbasses and you guys were loud, I was trying to sleep!” Protesting, he pushes Haechans wet shoulder back.

“Well, now we’re going to be twice as loud.” Haechan slams the door in Doyoungs face and grabs you, throwing you on the bed. You give a squeal, and hear Doyoungs fist hit the door.

“I swear I’ll make a noise complaint.” He sounded more irritated than sleepy now.

“Go ahead, you’re just mad I’m getting laid and you aren't.” You playfully slap Haechans arm, but he nips at your hand. The other side of the door grows silent, Doyoung either going to report you two, or going back to his room defeated.

“Shall we pick up where we left off princess?”