#if you can find a canon character that could work for Idas former identity I say do it

[mkarchin713]

Ida was having the best time.

Sure her bitch of a daughter in law and her spineless worm of a son had carted her off to an old folks home under a fake name and and equally fake Alzheimer’s diagnosis after she cut them out of the will left her entire fortune and all the patents to Sam in a vein attempt to pressure her into giving them everything, but other than that she was great. If only she could talk to Sam everything would be peachy.

At least she had Tim. The kid would have been a great con man but Ida knew enough to recognize a kid looking for a mark when she saw one. Originally she planned on stringing him along if only to protect the other patients who actually had dementia, that and she wanted somebody to mess with. Poor chump bought her act hook line and sinker and she quickly learned why Tim really needed a grandma Edna.

Ida had to admit, Tim’s plan was as brilliant as it was unnecessary. Kid didn’t want to be adopted cause he didn’t wanted to be taken in out of obligation and apparently his not-dad wasn’t doing a good job at showing Tim was loved and cared for. Too bad Tim picked Ida because Granny Edna’s not gonna let him go anytime soon. Plus she hasn’t had this much fun since she was a Holliday Girl, well almost.

Messing with Tim wasn’t as fun as punching Nazis, sneaking off to make out with Janos Prohaska, or ruffling the feathers of all those stiffs in the All Star Squadron, but hat she was old, her body couldn’t keep up with all the excitement of her youth anymore.

Speaking of the All Stars Ida needs to convince Tim to take her to the next reunion. If she doesn’t show her old friends will come looking for her and she doesn’t want poor Danny to get swept up in super hero politics at his age, it sucks all the fun out of being a hero. At the very least she can probably convince Jason to take her, kids got more street smarts than his brother that’s for sure.

You know how Tim made up an Uncle and hired an actor to play Him to prevent Bruce from adopting Tim?

Like...what if he just went to a Rest Home/Assisted Living/Home Care place instead and found a Grandparent aged adult to be his Grandma/pa? Especially if said person has Alizhmers and so doesn't realize that Tim isn't their actual family member. He just wanders around until someone calls out to him like they know who he is. Where they think he's their son or grandson and after a few test runs of them constantly thinking he's related to them, he just runs with it.

It's not like the courts will care. If he can fake an Uncle he can definitely fake a relationship to Grandma Edna, (married 6 and a half times so she tells the staff with pride) and Tim's like "Oh yes she's the first wife of Grandpa Drake but we don't talk about their explosive marriage." (Grandma Edna ran with the mob after all. Did those nasty heists) and Grandpa Drake divorced her lickety split once he found out (hence why no one remembers she was a Drake -because she never was-) because she wasn't on the up and up and Grandpa Drake married Grandma Drake soon after for the status and Grandma Drake was the mother of Jack Drake, his father. But Edna's still family you know and Tim can visit without reprecussions now since he's the last Drake. Which is great. Tim is happy. Grandma Edna is happy to see (name changes every time she sees him) and it's all going great!

.... Until Jason catches on.

Until Jason visits the facility where Grandma Edna is while Tim is there.

Until Grandma Edna is like "Oh Mitchy! Look your father is here. Preston dear. You need to bond with your son! Here's some money *pulls out a wad of cash and a switch blade from behind her oxygen tank* He's been missing you something fierce. Go to a ball game okay? Oh! And Stab the umpire for me. He still owes me for the 86th. You tell him that. He'll know what I mean. And buy a chilli dog! Alex is far too skinny! You need to feed him more Victor." And Tim just....has to go along with it.

Because he can't be exposed. He's had Grandma Edna for a year and a half year now and doesn't want to lose her too.

Now if only he can convince Jason that Tim pretending to be Edna's grandson is much better than Bruce having to adopt him out of obligation. He's not Bruce's son after all. Not family. That's for Jason. "See Jason it's fine. I'm not replacing you like this. I have my own family. It's well...it's fake. But she doesn't realize and that's fine. You don't even have to take me anywhere! She won't remember once you leave, just leave. I'll be fine. It's all fi--why in the world are you buying me a chilli dog!?"

[eggymovies]

Favorite Movies of 2019

Last year I used this space to post a list and short write-up of my favorite movies of 2018. This year, I’ll be doing the same a bit. I’m not much of a writer, just someone who likes movies and wants other people to like them too.

I went to the movies 101 times and watched about 250 movies in total between the theater and home viewings. Two highlights of non-2019 movies that I discovered for the first time this year and haven’t stopped thinking or talking about: Teddy Bear (10 timer til Paradis) (available on Amazon Prime)

Somewhere (rent it on iTunes, Amazon, or anywhere)

I’d also like to use this space to praise Cold War, which was distributed after my 2018 list came out but would have made it to the top 5 of the year. An achingly romantic epic (though only 88 minutes in length) directed by Polish master-filmmaker Pawel Pawlikowski, who won the best foreign film Oscar for 2013′s Ida, Cold War depicts the tragic love story of two musicians spanning multiple decades in post-WWII Europe. It’s available for free on Amazon Prime.

Alright... here is my top 20 films of 2019 list, which changed yesterday, will change a little tomorrow, and will look completely different in a year: 20. Toy Story 4

A perfect end to a near-perfect franchise. I’m not sure anyone believed this would be more than a cash-grab, but Pixar employed it’s flagship franchise and characters to explore ideas about growing up and letting go. That might sound like a rehash TS3, but the fourth installment proved itself unique and worthy of addition to the canon. Let’s just hope Disney/Pixar ends things here. 

19. Wild Rose

One of the strongest performances of the year, Jessie Buckley is enough to vault this pretty good movie into my top 20. A troubled young woman recently released from a Scottish women’s prison attempts to follow her dream of becoming a famous Nashville country singer. If that’s not enough to compel you to watch this film (streaming on Hulu), at least watch the music video for Glasgow, an original song from the film that is also one of my favorite songs of the year. 

18. Triple Frontier

If you know me at all, you should have seen this coming. Oscar Isaac, Ben Affleck, Charlie Hunnam, Garret Hedlund and Pedro Pascal (whom Netflix is smart enough to not hide behind armor and a helmet) are former Special Forces soldiers who team up to rob a South American crime boss. What seems like a typical heist movie about one more job surprises half way through by turning into a film about survival at any cost. The Metallica needle-drop as a helicopter flies over a South American highway and mountain range all but cemented this movie’s place on this list. I have no shame.

17. Us

The first time I saw Jordan Peele’s follow-up to 2017′s breakout hit Get Out, I liked it a lot and ached for a second viewing to pick up on all the easter-eggs and deeper meaning behind his choices. On second viewing every choice was cheapened and I found that I liked it less, saddened by what I saw as shallow metaphor and an ending that ripped of Karyn Kusama’s The Invitation. Over the next month or so I found myself telling people that Us was a blast, and that it’s intention was not to be read more deeply, but simply enjoyed as a brilliantly crafted and visually stunning modern horror masterpiece. Then I forgot about it for a few months. I don’t know exactly how I feel now but I know I want to watch it again and that I think about it frequently. 

16. 1917

A lot has been said about the filmmaking and “one-take” effect employed by Roger Deakins (cinematographer) and Sam Menders (director), which is impressive and worthy of the praise it’s received, but I won’t belabor that point. What worked for me was the chemistry between the film’s stars, George MacKay and Dean-Charles Chapman, who help turn a WWI epic into a tender story about friendship and family. A necessary breath of fresh air before the film becomes a somewhat oppressive and stressful POV take on the horrors of war. 

15. A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

All hail Mariel Heller, who managed to direct America’s Dad as America’s Friendliest Neighbor without being overly saccharine or sentimental. Vanity Fair’s Kam Collins pointed out that “Close-ups on fred rogers hit different”, which was spot on. Rogers was always seen and felt from a distance, and while we spend a lot of time with him here, Heller’s film isn’t about him but rather his disarming effect on people who met and knew him. Taking the POV of the journalist who is profiling him works wonders.

14. Paddleton

This Netflix film starring Mark Duplass and Ray Romano went mostly ignored or unwatched in 2019 as far as I can tell, but I happened upon it one evening (thanks, algorithms) and was moved by it’s tenderness and Romano’s remarkable performance playing against type. Fans of Duplass’ early career as a mumblecore king will feel at home in this two-hander about best friends and neighbors navigating life as one of them is diagnosed with a terminal illness and plans for assisted-death. Me loving a move about male emotion and processing grief? Shocker. 

13. Midsommar

Speaking of grief, Midsommar hit the zeitgest in July and I’m sure if you’re reading this you already saw it or determined that it wasn’t for you. Someone on a Ringer podcast used the mixed-metaphor “Fish out of water getting shot in a barrel” which perfectly distills the events that transpire when a group of college students travel to Sweden for a midsummer festival that turns into something much, much scarier. It’s not a spoiler, you fucking know things aren’t what they seem. I could go long on Florence Pugh but she’s the performer of the year in my mind. Midsommar, Fighting With My Family (which rocks), Little Women (see below), and in late 2018 in Park Chan-wook’s adaptation of The Little Drummer Girl for AMC which was remarkable and as good as almost any film on this list. 

12. Under the Silver Lake

David Robert Mitchell followed up 2017′s excellent It Follows with this wonderfully weird paranoia soaked Los Angeles neo-noir stone flick. This film shares so much DNA with Chinatown, The Big Lebowski and Inherent Vice, but is it’s own strange exploration of the meaning (or meaningless) of life and art and the world that surrounds us. I’m still not sure I understand what the point was, if there was any at all, but I think that was also the point? You’ll understand what the means after watching the film. Or maybe you won’t. I don’t know, it’s a fun one. 

11. Atlantics

To say much about the plot of Mati Diop’s brilliant debut film Atlantics would be a disservice to anyone who hasn’t seen it. Seriously, it’s on Netflix right now and is a stunning and spooky original story that demands your attention. I can’t stress this enough, the less you know the better. Prepare to be surprised in the best way possible. 

10. Transit

Christian Petzold’s Transit is an unsettling tale about identity and one man’s struggle to find human connection while in the midst of a chaotic attempt to escape a fascist state. Franz Rogowski is hypnotic and Petzold’s choice to film this WWII story set in France without period signifiers has a dizzying effect. Watch it on Amazon Prime right now!

9. Once Upon A Time in Hollywood

There’s been enough discourse around this movie and enough writing on it that I don’t need to get into it. It’s Leo, Brad, and Robbie. It’s LA in 1969. It’s Tarantino. It’s excellent. 

8. Ad Astra

A space movie starring Brad Pitt directed by James Gray. Do I need to say anything else? A movie about a sad man who goes to space to deal with his feelings, much like my favorite film of 2018. 

7. Little Women

Set across two timelines and jumping back and forth between them, Greta Gerwig brings her uniquely nimble and manic energy to this adaption of the classic Louisa May Alcott Novel and it works perfectly. I was disappointed to hear that Gerwig’s follow-up to her perfect debut (Lady Bird) with another hollywood adaptation of Little Women but her take on the store is one of a kind. The murderers row of talent top to bottom doesn’t hurt.

6. The Irishman

I can’t believe I doubted Scorsese after seeing the first trailer for The Irishman. How stupid of me and anyone who thought his latest epic wouldn’t be necessary and singular. A brilliant and tender take on the gangster film, Martin Scorsese crafted a film that acts as a sorrowful conversation with his own life and work and the careers of the three men at the center of this story. De Niro and Pacino are incredible, but Pesci is otherworldly. Lost in the brilliance of those three titans is Stephen Graham’s hilarious and devilishly mean and charismatic supporting performance.

5. Parasite

Nearly unanimous praise has been showered on Bong Joon-ho’s Parasite, and this masterpiece is somehow still underrated. It’s funny and thrilling and perfect. I don’t need to convince you, you’ve already heard it all. If you haven’t seen it, go now. If you have seen it, see it again.

4. Pain & Glory

Pain & Glory is a brightly colored and tender reflection on the director’s childhood and ouvre. Banderas’ awe-inspiring turn as a stand-in for the director, master Spanish filmmaker Pedro Almodóvar, is smart and sweet and devastating.

3. Marriage Story

I love Noah Baumbach’s films (Frances Ha, Meyerowitz Stories, Kicking and Screaming), unless I hate them (Greenberg, Mistress America, Margot at the Wedding). And even when I hate them, I revisit them constantly and think about them with more frequency than many movies I love. He already made one of the best divorce films ever (The Squid and the Whale) and redirects his acerbic wit and cynical view of people’s motivations and love toward the process of uncoupling (and to some extent, the city of LA). There’s something ultimately hopeful and light about Baumbach’s view of humanity and love here, even as we watch both deteriorate through most of the film. Driver and Johansson are terrific. 

2. Uncut Gems

A24 made a movie starring Adam Sandler centered around the outcome of a 2012 Boston Celtics playoff game that co-starred Lakeith Stanfield. If you didn’t know this movie existed, you’d think it came from a dream I had. It did not. Tense, tight, terrifying and hilarious, I saw this twice in theaters and will see it again. This is the Josh and Benny Safdie’s Goodfellas, and they will win an Oscar in 20 years for a movie that is less daring and less original and we will all look back on this year as the moment we failed to realize the torch had been passed. 

1. The Farewell

The Farewell starts by announcing it is “Based on an actual lie” and from those opening frames you know you’re in masterful hands. A heart-wrenchingly sweet and somber film filled with humor and honesty, it is the story of a family choosing to hide the matriarch’s cancer diagnosis from her so she can live out her final days without the anxiety and stress of knowing. Awkwafina, in a wonderful performance playing against type, is the Chinese-American granddaughter who struggles to find her place in the narrative her family is creating, torn between her ties to her Chinese heritage and American identity, feeling like the other in both worlds she inhabits. I have been unable to shake many moments in this film from my mind and would wholeheartedly recommend to anyone and everyone I know. It will not disappoint.

[mstopportunity]

Reblogging with the tags:

#tim drake#fake family au#grandma edna knows more than she lets on#does she actually have alzheimers? that depends. you a cop?#dp x dc#dpxdc#Ida Manson#is Grandma Edna#she was also a Holliday Girl. a member of the All Star Squadron and the ex girlfriend of the original Blackhawk#she knows Danny is Phantom#she probably knows Tim is Robin too#Ida got left in an old folks home for changing her will and her son and daughter in law won’t let her out till she agrees to change her will#Sam doesn’t know where Ida is and is worried about her#Ida gets all her cash playing cards with shady nurses who steal the actual patients money#Ida was a hero and her husband was a retired supervillain#they decided to retire when they got pregnant and make money using her husbands more commercially viable inventions#if you can find a canon character that could work for Idas former identity I say do it

You know how Tim made up an Uncle and hired an actor to play Him to prevent Bruce from adopting Tim?

Like...what if he just went to a Rest Home/Assisted Living/Home Care place instead and found a Grandparent aged adult to be his Grandma/pa? Especially if said person has Alizhmers and so doesn't realize that Tim isn't their actual family member. He just wanders around until someone calls out to him like they know who he is. Where they think he's their son or grandson and after a few test runs of them constantly thinking he's related to them, he just runs with it.

It's not like the courts will care. If he can fake an Uncle he can definitely fake a relationship to Grandma Edna, (married 6 and a half times so she tells the staff with pride) and Tim's like "Oh yes she's the first wife of Grandpa Drake but we don't talk about their explosive marriage." (Grandma Edna ran with the mob after all. Did those nasty heists) and Grandpa Drake divorced her lickety split once he found out (hence why no one remembers she was a Drake -because she never was-) because she wasn't on the up and up and Grandpa Drake married Grandma Drake soon after for the status and Grandma Drake was the mother of Jack Drake, his father. But Edna's still family you know and Tim can visit without reprecussions now since he's the last Drake. Which is great. Tim is happy. Grandma Edna is happy to see (name changes every time she sees him) and it's all going great!

.... Until Jason catches on.

Until Jason visits the facility where Grandma Edna is while Tim is there.

Until Grandma Edna is like "Oh Mitchy! Look your father is here. Preston dear. You need to bond with your son! Here's some money *pulls out a wad of cash and a switch blade from behind her oxygen tank* He's been missing you something fierce. Go to a ball game okay? Oh! And Stab the umpire for me. He still owes me for the 86th. You tell him that. He'll know what I mean. And buy a chilli dog! Alex is far too skinny! You need to feed him more Victor." And Tim just....has to go along with it.

Because he can't be exposed. He's had Grandma Edna for a year and a half year now and doesn't want to lose her too.

Now if only he can convince Jason that Tim pretending to be Edna's grandson is much better than Bruce having to adopt him out of obligation. He's not Bruce's son after all. Not family. That's for Jason. "See Jason it's fine. I'm not replacing you like this. I have my own family. It's well...it's fake. But she doesn't realize and that's fine. You don't even have to take me anywhere! She won't remember once you leave, just leave. I'll be fine. It's all fi--why in the world are you buying me a chilli dog!?"