#if you are OP and you’d rather I not post this just lmk!!

[astronicht]

Good morning. This is the best fic comment I have ever received.

[gryphsdeadbones]

hey from one nd person to another the comic where fm gordon says a slur seems kind of in poor taste. ik ur not intentionally making light of it and tht occurring in fm should be criticized but while you dont make it out to be a good thing making jokes about it and calling him a "slurboy" is kind of questionable? it makes it seem more like a plotpoint and angst rather than the creator of fm genuinely fucking up in the past (and having moved on from it)! i think exploring fm coming to terms with being nd is a good idea but this isnt the best way to do it. if you want me to explain my point more lmk if/when u post this and i will! someone already made a post abt it but it was kinda strongly worded and i wanted to approach you more calmly because i genuinely dont want to call you out or start drama or anything ;-;

first off thank you for being civil and patient with me i appreciate this ask a lot- also this got long- im not in a flying rage or anything when i bold or emphasis text, i just needed it also for my own readability and since im not the best at wording- hopefully this hellsite works and my response is under the cut

i would like to know how is it in poor taste when freemind explicitly gets clocked at the very end for saying it. the entire point of the comic was to show that saying the r slur has existed in his source and is bad

im not sure how much more direct i can get, with the disclaimer/warning list growing longer and longer and out there for a huge sign that says “this au can get dark as fuck and these subject matters are treated seriously/not something to mess around with.” Like yes, there are some jokes in the asks and other comics, but that specific comic is not supposed to be “haha thats funny”. it has a serious tone using a rough sketch style bc i was super tired and wanted to vent

was it just the direct reference to it that just made people uncomfortable? because thats 100% understandable, and i made sure i tagged it appropriately (although admittedly, a little bit late since i thought the filter would catch at least the main thing)

i think what some people somehow got from it is “exploring sensitive content = endorsing said content” which! that is not the intent! i absolutely do not want people saying that word! I don’t want people thinking that is any way okay for this character to say

its more of a damned if i do address it, damned if i dont.

if it never comes up, people are gonna assume that ‘oh this character says slurs and is shit, surely the creator or fan-creator MUST be okay with it and woobifies freemind and absolves him of any mistakes’ or something like that. no. this asshole has an arc and i want to do it right. its serious and i think it shouldn’t be shoved under the rug

and people just. dont want to read for context for whatever reason. theyll start watching it and get taken aback by the slur and start blaming me ‘hey you never warned for this’ when very early on i keep mentioning over and over ‘you dont have to watch it if you dont want to! This has slurs and 2000s internet brand humor/style’ You really dont, I’m not forcing you to watch it- Literally all you need to know is either canon half life or hl/vrai. thats it. fm mostly follows hl1 with very slight changes.

so i had to make something that:

1. warns people who arent aware and dont want to go through my asks or about/warning pages (for whatever reason) and just want to see the art

2. also NOT downplay freemind’s canon assholery. listen, i kinda despise writing mean and cruel characters, theyre hard to do, and a lot of people get shit for doing it wrong or people going “character = author”

i’ve also considered leaving the bubbles blank, but then people could fill it with whatever they want, then blame me for being vague. or they’d fill it in with a different kind of slur that freemind has never used, even if he MIGHT be the type to do that. I needed to explicitly mention that it is ableist slur. There are shitty racist and other problematic jokes, but never those kinds of extreme racial slurs to my knowledge.

Although I do see your point that maybe joking about it outside of the serious stuff might not be the best route. The slurboy jokes are getting stale, and I will try a better way to remind people.

The thing that gets to me is that it feels people are more than ready to defend either Ross Scott or Gordon Freeman the fictonal character himself. I don’t??? really care for Ross Scott, so I don’t know if he’s ever brought it up specifically. I’m not really calling him out or cancelling him. Idc for some white man’s feelings, im only bringing the timeframe of That era and reworking it to fit in This current era.

And I hate to break it to people: Gordon Freeman is a blank slate character, you can project whatever the hell you want on him as long as it’s not freakshit illegal garbage. The machinimas (fm, hl/vrai) do have SOME characterization that I want to nail down. It fucking sucks when characters are ooc, and I’m trying not to do that, even if it means sacrificing some comfort. But still mostly staying in my comfort zone if that makes sense

Now about the callout that I do not want to engage with the op directly:

Honestly im very surprised the comic was called out when i just. thought my stuff is relatively tame on exploring the bad shit canon freemind does. ive seen him in fancontent where they really dont hold back and its still played off as ‘kinda funny’ tone.

I really don’t know if people just want any reason to hate me for whatever reason. That’s fine I guess, I can’t please everyone and they dont have to like me.

But like. isn’t it so much easier for the op of that to block me and the post and move on. Why kick up such a fuss. I can see that thinly veiled death threat of a vague. That’s pretty fucked up- Like holy fucking god, you do not have to like my stuff. I’m not holding you at knifepoint to like my stuff. I’ve specifically made two different tags (one general au, one specific au) if anyone wants to blacklist it for their own reasons I do not need to know. I don’t want to know.

You’re allowed to be uncomfortable. You’re allowed to unfollow/blacklist/block.

However you just don’t go ranting about it for something you horribly misinterpreted. If it bothers you so badly, literally just. drop me a message to clarify. thats it. or save yourself the time and block me.

I’ve blocked the op for both our sakes, but if anyone wants to send this post to them, then thats fine. I don’t want anything to do with them.

I don’t want to link the post and blow it up. I just want shit clarified, dropped and we can move the fuck on with our lives. 

If you��re reading this and don’t know what the post is, please don’t bother. I do not want people going after the op with threats, please keep it civil, I’d prefer if you don’t engage with the post at all on my behalf.

Despite this huge wall of text, I do not want this to be a big deal, so please don’t ask me about the details.

_

As for anon, feel free to dm me either on here or. Maybe on discord if you’d still like to suggest or have something more cleared up. I’m still willing to hear any kind of feedback, and i want to thank you again for being reasonable about this

[ocsandallthatjazz]

Hii, I have three things to ask - 1. You have One Piece ocs? Please, tell me about them! 2. Crossover, maybe?👀👀 3. Add me to the tag list? Okay I lead four things -for what other fandoms do you have ocs?

Oh my gosh, hello! The emotional high I got getting this ask - out of this world - I will take any and every excuse to go crazy over these guys. Allow me to unpack!  (this might get a little long lol)

I have 5 official one piece ocs and they are all part of a greater universe shared with @oc-daydreams (she got me into the show and her ocs were definitely part of that process). I’ll try to reel in my tangents, so for any old posts about them, here’s the link to my tag for all of my op ocs, ok let’s go:

Jasper Kodiak - I. Love him. Jasper grew up on the Sabaody Archipelago, where he meets and then joins the Heart Pirates. He ate a devil fruit as a kid that I call the truth-truth fruit, a paramecia that basically makes him a human lie detector. Makes him real handy on gauging new people, he knows when people are hiding something. A huge backbone to his story is his big annoying crush on Law and his complicated friendship with saraid’s oc Ophelia. Jasper also has a pet puffin he, just, picked up on an island and his name is Mango akljfda

Dani LaVerre - We have entered the zone for my Revolutionary Army obsession. Dani was my first one piece oc! She comes from a royal family in the West Blue, but inevitably leaves to join the rebels, where she ends up learning to be a sniper and work with the group’s weapons. Dani is rather quiet, and very polite, and has a bit of a mediator, peacemaker personality, so maintaining those values while finding her own freedom and her own will to fight is important to her. (omg i had to scroll back up to mention she’s a sabo oc lol how did i not say his name alkfdj)

Pedrina Salvatora - ...I once decided that if I’m gonna wait forever for Oda to give me the luffy mom backstory, I would make up one for fun, but like, she was supposed to stay a backstory. I have no control over this woman. Anyway, this is one of the founding members of the RA, she married the big boss himself, she has a very powerful guilt complex that’s like 19 years old now. The universe threw Sabo at her and she just had to accept that. She’s out here and ready to throw down at a moment’s notice. Also, I love her tattoos lol.

Carmen Aguilar - We’ve left the RA zone. Carmen is a marine with a penchant for nice rapiers. She trained under Vice Admiral Tsuru and now she’s usually out and about on her own missions. (Does she “coincidentally” run into Mihawk on the job quite a bit? Yes, but you didn’t here it from me). Also, her hometown is Dressrosa, which I just think is neat!

Wendy - I created her just about one year ago! From road trip boredom and my love for Water 7, my favorite island in one piece. She grew up there and therefore has close ties with the rest of the city’s cast. She owns one of those yagara bull rental stalls and any time Wendy needs a new boat for the canals, she calls on her buddies at Galley-la for a favor. What’s plot? She barely knows it, she’s trying to live her life lajfkdljfad

And that’s the gang! As for your other questions - I’d be happy to add you to the tag list! So far I’ve only had one for Everything, but if you’d like to be specifically one piece lmk! I’d be down for some crossovers, I’m still very new to that so I don’t have a list of ocs exempt from it or anything yet (some of them are stubborn yknow how it gets aljfdlkjdf) but i’d love to talk about those kind of hypothetical! Finally, here’s a link to my oc list, I’d definitely give that a scroll for all the fandoms, there’s 20 right now! Basically my brand is ocs for animated things (one piece, avatar, haikyuu, ouran, fairy tail, etc just to name a few) the only live action shows I have ocs for so far are game of thrones and glee lol.

Thank you so much for the ask, it made my day! It was actually really fun to try to summarize everything like this kljaldakf and if you have other questions please shoot me an ask or message!

[nepsah]

lmk if you’d rather i not rb to respond to this-

i’ve gone under anesthesia a couple times (top surgery, and a couple oral surgeries) and usually the nervousness didn’t hit until the actual Day Of Surgery but its totally understandable that you’re nervous way before then since its your first time!

my typical coping method for that sort of thing is just to dive into big distractions but, sometimes i think it helps to hear from others abt how their experiences went so under the cut i’ve described mine - if you think that’ll make you more nervous, don’t read ‘em ahaha it won’t be anything graphic.

oral surgery 1: this was my first one as a young teen. for this one they used gas. they put a mask over my face and asked me to count down from 10. i think i recall getting to 8 and then the next piece of memory is being helped into a wheelchair so i could be taken to the car. zero pain, and i don’t remember being panicked over this one.

oral surgery 2: a few yrs after the first one ahaha... i barely remember the actual experience but with this one they inserted a needle into my arm and within seconds i was out - didn’t even have time to process them asking me to open my mouth for them ahaha. i don’t recall there being any pain from the actual injection, and i don’t actually remember waking up in the office, my memory picks up at my mother helping me into the car. i do remember my last thoughts before going under being a panic about not waking up after, but i didn’t really have time to talk to any of the surgeons or anesthesiologists about it. it was pretty much just “give us your arm” and bam. out like a light.

 --

top surgery: this was in 2015 and its the freshest memory i have. it took forever to actually get taken back to the operating room but beforehand. i had a parent with me and my phone to talk with friends tho so i mostly just tried to keep myself occupied? like i said - distraction is my Go To with panic-y thoughts that aren’t very productive. my surgeon came to chat with me a bit about the procedure. the anesthesiologist and his assistant also came to talk with me about it. for this one there was an IV inserted into the back of my left hand for them to use during the operation.

i don’t really recall being nervous until they actually like. hooked the IV up to the anesthesia and that was only because for whatever reason it felt like my forearm was in a vice grip and also on fire. : |;;; i was advised that was normal!! they also had me count down.

when i woke up i was in a post-op holding area with a nurse keeping watch on me (i don’t recall anyone else being in there) - was given some water to drink, then wheeled into a room to wait for a bit longer before being released to go home.

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anyways- you should have a chance to speak with your dr (and possibly the anesthesiologist) before the surgery where you can talk with them about feeling nervous. there was a whole big team in the room for my top surgery, my brain chose to interpret that as plenty of people to catch anything going wonky.

when my brain decides to zero in on thoughts that make me freak out i have to Intentionally force myself to think about other things - its much easier said than done. i don’t know if you’ll have someone with you at the hospital but you may want to plan some distractions for you while you wait for the actual operation. i think i was sitting in the pre-op room for 1-1.5hrs before i actually went in for surgery. most of that time i spent either talking with my dad or with friends on my phone.

if you have had top surgery or any major surgeries where you had anesthesia - how do you shake the anesthesia panic. i am partially convinced i am going to die instead of wake up without boobs because i’ve never had surgery