#if this was a legit ask if you need me to clarify anything let me know

[winniefrezcomics]

Anonymous asked: When did Perry realize he was trans? Also are his parents also trans or non-binary or anyother gender identity? ♡

All three of them are trans, actually! Carlo strikes me as a person who went thru the lesbian-to-nonbinary-to-transgender pipeline, but I think Wendy knew she wanted to be treated like her twin sister was from a fairly early age, so transitioned much sooner than her husband. (Mama cosma’s disapproval also forced Carlo to socially transition in secret, and he wasn’t able to begin PHYSICALLY transitioning until turning 18 and moving out)

Here’s a comic that hurt tf outta my feelings to sketch lmao- (in a good way)

“orgin story” and more doodles below the cut!

(MILD cw for misgendering and a mama cosma appearance 😷)

As for HOW Perry discovered he was NOT in fact, a little girl, and rather a little boy?

Timmy noticed first, actually!! Though his adopted parents didn’t go out of their way to mention to their son that they were both transgender, a young Timmy eventually noticed them doing thier hormone shots, and Carlo and Wendy had to assure him that they were both okay, they just needed to take thier “mommy and daddy medication” sometimes. As Timmy got older, he noticed other things that made his parents unique, and they would explain anything he asked them, so by the time Poof was born, Ten-year-old Timmy had a pretty solid understanding of what it MEANT to be “transgender”. This understanding is part of the reason he wished on a star for a baby brother- he knew it MIGHT be possible for his parents to have a bio child as well, but also knew thier unique biology might make it difficult

(Sidenote: if ur parents still let u think babies were delivered by the stork or something by TEN, my condolences brother ☠️)

ANYWAY- from the MOMENT his baby sibling was born, Timmy and Poof were INSEPARABLE, with Timmy wanting to help with the baby in any way he could, as often as possible. His parents certainly appreciated the help, and baby Poof was never hurting for love or attention 💕

As Poof grew, his parents encouraged him to play with whatever toys he liked best, and do whatever he wanted, but USUALLY what Poof wanted to do was “whatever his big brother was doing”. From video games to comic books, poof was always incredibly interested in whatever Timmy was interested in, and his brother was more than happy to read the pages out loud, or give him a controller to smack around (usually unplugged lmao, regular older brother shi)

Even when Poof was a toddler, Timmy would occasionally notice things that didn’t quite sit right with him- stuff like poof getting upset when Wendy would tell Timmy his was playing too rough with his sister (despite how much poof LOVED being chucked into soft objects or wrestled), or how much poof seemed to enjoy being called things like “little dude”- but I think it was a visit to Grandmas house when Perry was 7 that finally made him ask the big question- (Drabble below this comic that legit makes me a lil nauseous to look at and I considered not including 🙃)

DRABBLE START

Timmy goes outside to thier front porch, to find poof already sitting on the steps, having clearly retreated from the Christmas party inside. Timmy sits with him and they chat for a while, before Timmy finally goes out on a limb and asks-

“Hey P- random question but- do you ever like, wonder what it would be like if you were a boy?”

Poof shrugs, simply responding “well yeah, everybody thinks about that….”

Timmys nose scrunches, as his hunch starts seeming more plausible

“Bud… I’ve like, never thought about that. even once.”

“Of course not, you already ARE a boy!” Poof pouts

Timmy sighs, clarifying- “no no, like- I’ve never really wondered what it would be like to be a GIRL- eveb when I once dressed like one to hang out with my crush!” He added with a laugh, but Poofs frown only deepened-

“Hmf! Why WOULD you? Being a girl STINKS.”

And with that, Timmy had his answer-

“Ah. Yeeeahhh, thought ya might feel that way… c’mon lil dude- I think we should ah- talk to mom and dad.”

Timmy scooped his younger sibling into his arms, but poof looked up at him with confusion

“Did I say something wrong?”

“Nah, Poofy- I just, uh- think they’ll be able to explain better…”

By Eight years old Perry had fully socially transitioned, coming out at his eighth birthday party, with his parents even getting his name legally changed as a ninth birthday present ��� ;w;

Making yall look at this doodle again bc it’s relevant lmao- Perry’s aunts and uncles all adore thier little nephew, and couldn’t be happier to see him living as his truest self 💕

[hazbin-but-good]

another hazbin hotel rewrite/redesign?

yup! and i'm so serious about it that i made a whole blog for it. i'm a white queer ex-cath tran doing this as an art and writing exercise, so feedback from other creatives + jewish and/or racialized folks is especially welcome.

i'm putting this post and only this post in the main tags for visibility. also, not gonna link my main, but i do make my own original stuff, and i encourage fans and haters alike to do the same.

anyway, here's a mostly good-faith 1.7k-word essay on the original. i think it's pretty funny and brings up some less talked-about points. correct me on the facts, disagree with my opinions, and ask clarifying questions, but don't come at me with any piss-poor reading comprehension.

the hellaverse is garbage, and here's why

cw: strong language, stronger opinions, intersectional feminist critical discourse analysis

1. vivienne medrano, the person

medrano was born as a well-off white-passing latina (salvadoran-american) in bougieass frederick, maryland. while attending new york's top art school, she got popular on deviantart-tumblr-twitter by being a prolific multifandom fujoshi furry who's more into ornamental character design than storytelling. upon graduation, she leveraged her fanbase and industry connections to make the hazbin and helluva boss pilots, get helluva made for youtube, and get hazbin made for amazon prime.

like every woman online, she gets harassed for no good reason, and as a certified autist, i will defend her right to be dumb, weird, annoying, and bad with words. however, there are legit reasons to criticize her:

racism, misogyny, homophobia, fatphobia, some antisemitism, past transphobia, past ableism

shitty boss, bad friend

cowardly, vindictive, manipulative, thoughtless behavior

skeevy friends

sucks at taking criticism

in short, i think she desperately needs a PR person and someone to clean up her digital footprint.

2. medrano's art

incurious

inauthentic

noncommittal

creatively stagnant

overindulgent, and the indulgence isn't even fun

shallow and childish framed as complex and mature

bland and boring framed as shocking and subversive

to be clear, i'm at peace with the existence of suckass art like this; i just think the money, attention, and praise it gets are unearned and should go to more interesting works, of which there are infinite.

medrano's had the time, money, and social cache to grow as an artist, learn from the best, and take creative risks, but she hasn't. if she truly has nothing more to offer, she should let her collaborators take the wheel, but she doesn't do that either. instead, she keeps getting more and more resources to make the same baby bullshit, and that pisses me off. she could be the nicest person ever, and this fundamental arrogance would still make her art blow.

stop with the pointless guilt: liking medrano's work does not make you stupid or evil. however, if you stay in the kiddie pool of culture, if you refuse to engage with a diversity of art, if the hellaverse is your point of reference for anything media-related, you can't expect to have your opinions on art, media, or culture taken seriously. you have not earned a seat at the table. you gotta hit the books first.

i cannot emphasize enough how much incredible stuff is out there if you're willing to look further than what social media and streaming services put right in front of you. if you come away from this blog having learned about just one new artist or piece of art, i'll be a happy camper.

3. the hellaverse

a. empty and confused

hazbin and helluva's content and marketing has no clear target audience. the subjects are inappropiate for teens, but the execution is too childish for adults, and lemme tell you what i don't mean by that, first.

not inherently inappropriate for teens:

sex and sexuality

violence, including when it intersects with the above

politics and religion

not inherently childish:

animation (any style)

comedy

episodic writing and/or loose continuity

young characters

fun, happiness, optimism, the power of friendship, cuteness, tenderness, sincerity, etc.

what i mean is that these shows are literally about adult characters who fuck, smoke, drink, do drugs, go clubbing, work full-time, manage their own finances, and deal with stuff like bureaucracy, sexual violence, domestic abuse, marriage, divorce, late adoption, and family estrangement.

however, none of these "adult" things are given enough specificity to create drama or comedy. it's all too stock, vague, flat, weirdly sanitized, and thus utterly banal—pure aesthetics on top of bad saturday morning cartoons. it's exactly what i'd expect from a sheltered disney kid who needs to log off and get into their local gay scene ASAP so their only contact with things like poverty, policing, addiction, and sex work stops being facile movies and TV.

if the shows were aware of this and played with it, that could be amazing, but they're not. they give you the mickey mouse version of the world with a straight face and then play looney tunes sound effects to try to make you laugh and sad_violin.mp3 to try to make you cry. now that's funny.

b. old and tired

let's make like americans and pretend that the rest of the world doesn't exist. even within the confines of the USA, home of the hays code, the red scare, and reaganite propaganda, this neopuritan fascist state ruled by 1000 megachurches in a trenchcoat, the indie/underground animation scene has been doing crazier shit for decades. anti-war films in the 60's, bakshi movies in the 70's, the simpsons shorts and r-rated movies in the 80's, adult swim and MTV in the 90's, flash/newgrounds/youtube in the 00's, streaming in the 2010's—so what are we doing in the 2020's with this wet white rice drowned in expired ketchup? i feel crazy making this point because it's obvious if you've watched these things, but if you haven't, you're gonna be like "well, there's gotta be something new here". no! there isn't! in the words of jimmy "the scot" jordan, nothing, nothing, NOTHING!

c. ideological purgatory

actually, there is one thing in these shows i've never seen before: the presbysterianism. shout out some interesting or at least intentional presbysterian art in the comments, because the way these ideas are presented here is not compelling. it just makes the rainbow neoliberalism even more confusing and contradictory.

i guess the big presbysterian things are protestanism, calvinism, and, uh, big church government? presbysterians, get your shit together. get your brand down. catholics have BDSM and vampires, evangelicals have TV and corporatism; what do you have? celtic crosses? no wonder medrano has such uninspired ideas on divinity.

d. queer deficiency

when i look at a piece of art, i ask myself: "what does this give me that i can't get from the hunchback of notre dame (1996)?" if the answer is as limp as "uhh, gay people, i guess", i can probably look for my gay shit elsewhere and rewatch the hunchback of notre dame (1996) in the meantime.

but let's say that you have no standards. you've been waiting for ages for a show about gays by the gays for the gays, and by god you're gonna get it. this is it! here we go! time for some

generic twink obliteration

male sexuality as aggression and dominance displays

WLW (sex and chemistry not included)

a couple straight femdoms

and the stalest sex jokes known to man

...yeah, it's not very queer. and by "queer", i mean "questioning or subverting gender norms (including sexual roles) within a given cultural context regardless of creator identity and intent". i'm not a queer studies scholar so LMK if there's a more specific term for this, but whatever you call it, it's not in the hellaverse much.

there's not even any transness, literal or metaphorical, just ancient drag jokes. i guess the writers thought we would've been too controversial. so much for an indie animation studio that prides itself in the diversity of its staff both above and below the line, bakshi-style. i wonder how medrano, a bisexual woman, would've felt if told that a lesbian main couple in hazbin would be "too controversial".

4. spindlehorse and the vivziepop brand

spindlehorse toons underpays its overworked staff and keeps outsourcing more and more labor to even more overworked freelancers overseas to cut costs. a rainbow sweatshop is still a sweatshop, and just because these practices may be "industry standard" doesn't make them any more ethical.

the studio has also been repeatedly accused by current and former employees and contractors of creating a hostile and abusive workplace. AFAIK, it still has no dedicated HR person, and victims are too afraid of retaliation like blacklisting and online harassment to speak out.

this is exactly the stuff that unions exist to prevent. as i'm writing this, the IATSE (the parent union of TAG, which is the parent union of all US animation unions) is negotiating with entertainment industry executives for better working conditions, and if the execs fuck around like last year, it's strike time again. so watch this space, voice your support, and don't cross any picket lines.

i hope spindlehorse unionizes, but until then and for these reasons, i don't think you should give money to the company.

first of all, all content on amazon-owned platforms is ok to pirate, and all youtube ads are ok to block. everyone involved in making the episodes has (or should have) been paid upfront, so you're not taking the bread out of anyone's mouth.

next, let's look at the succulent offerings of the official vivziepop merch shop:

$10 pins and keychains

$15 sticker packs

$20 mugs and acrylic cutouts

$25 shirts

$30 metal cards (not even tarot)

$40 lounge pants

$50 mini backpacks

random $80 skateboard deck

forgive my latin americanness, but this is all stuff you can get made by a local metalsmith, print/sublimation shop, or just crafty people in your life. it's cheaper, customizable, and better for the environment to skip all the shipping and packaging. also, not painting your own skateboard is poser shit.

the hazbin website also has $15 pins, one $20 keychain, and $6 trading card packs. people are weird about trading cards, so if for some reason you wanna gamble for a mass-produced bit of cardboard, plastic, and tinfoil, at least bulk-order for all the vivziepoppers in your area so it's less of a huge waste. better yet, trace the designs and make infinite bootlegs.

at the end of the day, buying merch is not activism. your bulk order of trading cards will not save any wage slaves from getting evicted from their overpriced studio apartments. however, the shop links you to all the credited artists/designers, and more of your bucks will actually reach them if you buy their designs directly, then turn them into body pillows or life-sized bronze statues or whatever the fuck.

go through the credits of any episode of helluva or hazbin, and you'll find even more creatives you might wanna support. get jinkx monsoon's albums on CD. subscribe to actually good artist, animator, and composer gooseworx. lots of voice actors now have patreon, cameo, or self-hosted pages where you can write better lines for their characters and have them read it. these things may not look as shiny as Official Merch™, but we all need less plastic shit and more culture anyway.

[stitchieau-the-actual-one]

ATTENTION

these are scam accounts making scam asks

Report and Block if received❢

Are all of them really scams?

YES❢ These are indeed all scams. Reblogging and/or giving these people money IS NOT HELPING❢ sadly the opposite actually. Remember, this is Tumblr not a humanitarian organization or charity. It’s a place for fandom people to communicate and post their content or shitpost or whatever.

Wow~ you’re racist for saying this, what if they’re tots legit?!

1) nobody in an active war zone has time to setup a go fund me, tumblr account, write a post, link the gofundme (we will get to you eventually but not today sadly) let alone go to all these different random accounts on mass to ask for aid… when they can go to already available humanitarian aid present and willing to help them. In an active crisis, train to help them in said crisis, with the resources to help them with said crisis.

(Edit: To clarify this is exclusively for tumblr, video platforms like tiktok are a more equipped for mass private fundraising campaigns and support a specific individual monetarily. There is a time and place for everything. Context is very important)

2) these are like… basic run of the mill scam messages. I get it not everyone here was around for “how to detect scams on the internet 101” or “internet safety 101” but the long and short of it is that all of these messages share the same information, these accounts all follow each other and lo and behold carry the same exact message copy pasted. Also notice the amount they’re asking for…

So what it’s just $5-.

It👏 will👏 not👏 stop👏 at👏$5👏‼️

$5 is the minimum amount required to establish a link between two bank accounts… doesn’t matter who the sender or receiver is. It only needs $5 to confirm and establish that link.

Which they will use to steal everything…

Or at least until you report it to the bank, change your account number, pins, banking address. But at that point, your money is well and lost. These scammers can also use this number to reck your credit score (which means making big purchases like a car or house is cooked), falsify loans, attach your name to literally anything their heart desires without your knowledge.

Why are you even bothering?

Because I care and don’t want some greaseball scum human to steal from you or those around you.

What do I do? They’re anonymous?

Did you know you can still report anon asks as scams the same way you do posts. Make sure to also block the account and spread this so others know not to fall for em. And remember these aren’t actually people in distress or genuine need, it’s just a shitturd pulling at your heart strings to try and rob you blind.

Scammers are like the fae, only you have the iron to yeet them into the abyss.

Edit: I also feel like I need to mention first and foremost this is NOT a political post by any means, and I do not want to touch that specific topic with a 10ft pole. It’s just me informing you guys of scammymcscammerson is on the bend again

[moodymisty]

Hey sickly anon here. I feel like I should explain myself a little. I was really worked up last night and just kinda sent that ask without any context and I know it must look like a troll ask.

I get that there is a lot of content focusing on thin readers/women(I don't much like those either)

It's not really that I'm super bothered by protrayals of different weight, it was just the phrasing that hit a nerve last night I think. I got sick in highschool and soon legitimately looked like a gaunt skeleton(still do tbh :/)

So not the cute desirable version of thin. More of the "is she terminal? poor thing.." To this day I get people doing horrified double-takes at me because of how I look so I guess it's slowly made me ultra sensitive about it.

And last night I had a guy get in my face and legit SCREAM because I couldn't process his return since he didn't have a receipt. And then had to do basically 3 people's jobs because 2 different coworkers decided to go to the club last night instead of work. A typical day in retail I guess.

So I get home and go straight to your blog because its a big comfort for me and I just kinda crumpled being reminded of my mess of a body.

But it wasn't really your fault. Like when you have a REALLY bad day and one more barely noteworthy little thing goes wrong/feels bad (like you drop your spoon or something) and you just McFricken lose it and can't stop the tears.

That was me last night lol. A little embarrassing in retrospec after I slept it off. I hope you don't think I was attacking you personally or anything. I was overwhelmed and just felt hurt and had to express myself somehow (did a terrible job of it I know lol. I was flustered.)

TL;DR: had a really bad day at work, getting reminded of my health condition and appearance was the last tiny nudge I needed to become a crybaby, cried about it, went to sleep, woke up feeling better and a little embarrassed I let it bother me so much.

Anyways, shenanigans aside I hope you have a good weekend :)

Hey, thanks for coming back to clarify, I preciate it. It’s no big deal, this is all a bunch of fictional stuff on the internet after all.

I grew up with a mother with severe eating disorders that put her in the ER multiple times. The way she views being fat as the ugliest thing you can be to the point she would rather die than be that way has become my inner voice for a long while and I’ve only just started to deal with my own eating disorder. The Fulgrim chubby chaser thing was just a fun meme that I was encouraging because so much of reader insert stuff has the “thigh gaps and running fingers through your hair, tiny cocktail dresses and picking you up” and it’s fun to pretend that maybe someone might like the way I look XD

And just because I answer a few asks about chubby people, they all exist in their own universe and it’s not like that’s canon. I have plenty others that don’t mention anything at all.

[juminies]

hi! omg thank u for giving the translations! i also thought it might be a lost in translation thing but ur right it’s just as vague in korean??? and i think so too, considering how’s he usually so blunt and straightforward the way he was skirting around the subject is a bit ???

though i just had a thought… i remember reading that in the original version, the jumin gay “jokes” are about him being a wizard - referencing a meme about virgin men who turn 30 suddenly gaining magical powers? idk if it’s legit because i don’t know korean but i saw it mentioned a few different times by a few different people… if it was true and we take the option that he hasn’t had any prior relationship experience as the truth this might be a possible explanation for his vagueness: i was thinking that since mc has the option to play along with these “jokes” & jumin’s feeling these new unfamiliar feelings for her… he dances around the subject because, although he usually doesn’t care about such things, the constant roasting has probably affected him subconsciously and he sees his inexperience as a bad thing. he might think that telling mc the truth might give her a bad impression of him but he also doesn’t want to outright lie to her so being vague is the safest option

also ur right, considering how hurt he was with the whole sarah debacle, it makes sense that chairman han probably hasn’t done something similar to him before. i never thought about it that way!!

the uni experience thing… if he ever did date, he’d probably have done it during this time but i feel like it’s unlikely due to the points in the previous ask. the sleeping with someone i can’t see happening at all for a few reasons: he’s always going on about the no living together before marriage thing, even with mc who he loves he wants to wait, he mentions he’s conservative, and him hating his father’s womanizing ways leads me to think he would steer clear from anything casual. also, with all the women who have been making inappropriate advances towards him throughout his life and him having nightmares about it… i can potentially see him not feeling comfortable enough to want to experience physical intimacy unless it was with someone he trusted and felt safe with, especially for his first time… and he mentions rika being the first woman in his life he felt comfortable around…

honestly with how often it’s mentioned that jumin not’s interested in women or relationships and jumin himself straight up saying he hates women, i personally don’t think he’s let himself get close enough to a woman to have any romantic or sexual experience at all, like i deadass don’t think he’s even held hands in a romantic sense

i think ur “come meet my friend and his daughter” theory seems to be the most plausible! it’s the least contradictory with the other information we’ve been given. it’d work around the jumin not being interested in women or relationships … by having chairman han getting jumin to come along as a kind of casual get together and then making himself and his friend scarce, leaving jumin alone with the daughter. it’d also explain the bit about him saying that he doesn’t even know if he can even say he saw them.

anyway that is a lot of writing over like 2 sentences said by jumin lmao but it’s fun to theorize

also i am HERE for the chairman han post, that man needs a good slandering!!!

to clarify, I have always thought that he's a virgin prior to meeting MC! I agree he does not at all come across as the casual type for a plethora of reasons, most of which you mentioned already. it seems that he puts quite a lot of weight on wanting sex with MC to be right, too, whatever that means to him. I think most theories for why he would not be a virgin are kind of absurd hahah. I have seen people imply that he was sleeping with women to get them to sign contracts which.. no comment. he was just being handsome and charming.

I mainly mentioned university as a possible (albeit unlikely) scenario because it's the one time in his life we know practically nothing about, and Jumin being abroad for his studies dually makes it the perfect time to make bad and/or out of character choices. curiosity is a very big part of Jumin's personality and so while I don't personally think it happened I do think if he was hypothetically to have slept with someone at any point it would have been as a one-time, rather literal experiment at nineteen or twenty. written results afterwards and everything. it would also give him psychic damage.

I do also agree he probably sees his lack of inexperience as a bad thing, honestly, which is sad because it's definitely not :( he seems a little self-conscious generally when it comes to MC, hyperaware of himself and how she might perceive him. he says himself it's unlike him to care about what other people think, and I think it's actually very cute that he gets a bit frazzled by it all. I love him so much.

[deathtothesoul]

Death to the Soul Chapter 8

The next day Ryane let herself get lost in her pyrography again. Her phone started blaring a heavy guitar riff.

“Hey, Ryane!” a feminine voice said.

“Hey, Karen.”

“I’m with Becky and Clair. We heard about your mom. I was wondering if you wanted to get together today.”

“Sure. I don’t have a car at the moment but if you want to stop by you can.”

“Great! See you soon!”

Ryane hung up, but her phone rang again. It was Quinn.

“I miss you,” he said.

“I have some friends coming over, but I’d like to meet you afterwards. Be here at noon.”

“Alright. See you then.” He hung up.

She didn’t get much work done before the doorbell rang. The three girls were standing there with smiles on their faces.

“Hey, come on in,” she said.

        “So, fill us in,” Karen said, settling on the couch. “How are you feeling?”

Ryane shrugged. “Better than expected, I guess. I have a boyfriend.”

The girls squealed, making Ryane flinch. “Tell us everything!” Clair insisted.

“How did you meet?” Becky asked.

Ryane smiled. “Well, his name is Quinn. I actually met him that night I... had car trouble. He was kind enough to help out and drive me to where I was headed and back.”

“Wait... you just got in a car with a stranger?” Karen asked, leaning forward.

“Well, I couldn’t be late for the thing. And it’s not like he turned out to be a serial killer or anything.”

“You’re really lucky,” Becky said.

“I know,” she replied. “Anyways he’s like... crazy rich. His house is a legit tower! It’s insane!”

“Wow!” Clair said, “What does he do for a living?”

“He says he’s a lawyer... but I don’t know. It just doesn’t feel like it lines up. But I’m giving him the benefit of the doubt.”

“And what’s he like?” Clair asked.

A wide grin spread across her face as she blushed. “He’s really sweet. Very awkward but nice. He was very affectionate from the start but I kind of liked it. It made things more comfortable in a way. I mean he’s not like inappropriate or anything. He actually makes me feel safe. I feel like he really gets me.”

“That’s really good!” Karen said, smiling.

“Clair, I forgot to ask, how are you doing? I’m so sorry for your loss.”

Clair laughed nervously and looked down. Karen put a comforting arm on her back. “It’s been getting better,” Clair said.

“We’re taking good care of her,” Becky assured.

“Well, if you need to talk, you know, I’m always willing to listen,” Ryane said.

“Thanks, hun.”

“So... did you ever... you know,” Karen said, trailing off.

Ryane looked at her, confused. “What?”

“Did you get the chance to reconcile with your mom?” Becky clarified.

“No... why?” Ryane asked.

“She was always so nice. We all hoped you would have made peace with her.”

Ryane took a moment to compose herself. “She wasn’t a good mom. I told you about my high school, right? That I was raped by the head teacher? She didn’t protect me. None of my family did.”

“She did her best for you,” Karen said. “She loved you. She told us how much you hurt her. She cried on our shoulders when you two would fight. She seemed like she just wanted to help.”

“Do you really think it was appropriate for her to speak to you about me when I wasn’t there? What else did she say?” 

“She just wanted a relationship with you. She was worried about you,” Becky insisted.

“I wanted to be happy. I wanted to be normal. She should have helped me get better!” Ryane snapped.

“You need to forgive her,” Karen said sternly.

“You have got to be kidding me! How can you say that with a straight face? I was raped! I have PTSD and severe depression from it! And she saw how unhappy I was! All she did was insist I look and act how she wanted me to! I don’t owe her anything!”

Karen sighed and exchanged a worried glance with Clair.

Becky huffed and said, “Don’t you think you may be exaggerating a bit? It’s time to let it go. You should focus on other things!”

“You never believed me, did you? None of you did,” Ryane uttered.

Karen paused, choosing her words carefully. “I believe that you believe…”

“Shut up!” Ryane snapped. “Why didn’t you tell me this before? You backstabbing cunts! Get out!”

The girls quickly gathered their things and left without another word. Ryane curled up on the couch and cried into a teal pillow her mother had picked out for her.

The doorbell rang. She slowly got up and answered it.

“Hey,” Quinn said. She stepped aside to let him enter. He looked at her confused. “Did I do something wrong?” he asked.

“No. It’s a long story, and I’m too upset to talk about it,” she said, grabbing her purse and shrugging her coat on. 

“Is there anything I can do?”

She wrapped her arms around his midsection and buried her face in his chest. He closed his arms around her. “I want you to help me dig a hole so I can crawl in it and die,” she said, her voice muffled by his shirt.

“I’m not going to let that happen,” he said flatly.

“Then I want a mountain of chocolate peanut butter ice cream and a pile of blankets to hide in.”

He began to salivate at the thought of tasting her blood riddled with that much sugar. Not today, he told himself. He took a deep breath, clearing his head.

“I can do that,” he said. He put a comforting arm around her shoulder and led her to his car. He pulled out and headed to the grocery store. “When you’re ready to talk about it, I’ll be happy to listen,” he said.

“Thank you,” she replied, hugging her mid-section. “That means a lot.”

“You’re welcome.” He pulled into a spot in the parking lot. They got out and Quinn grabbed a cart. “I desperately need to do some grocery shopping,” he said. “I want to have food at my house you can eat. You know my diet is so restrictive.”

When they got back to his place, Ryane helped him put the groceries away. She made herself a bowl of ice cream.

“I think it’s time we watched that documentary,” he suggested.

“What documentary?” she asked, feigning confusion.

“You thought I forgot, didn’t you?” he sneered. “Your debt must be paid,” he said.

        Ryane rolled her eyes. “Fine.”

        In the family room, they settled on the couch, and he pulled her close to him, locking his arm around her waist and turning on the TV with his free hand. The DVD menu came up. It read, “Trees and plant life from around the nation.”

“Oh god... I hope this isn’t what I think it is,” she asked, beginning to squirm but she couldn’t free herself, especially with the bowl of ice cream in her hands.

“They go to each state and discuss the different plant life,” he said with an amused grin. “I know you well enough. You would have been thrilled if this was something historical.”

“You bastard!” she sputtered as he pushed play. 

He tightened his arms as he whispered mockingly in her ear, “Sorry.”

He slowly brought his lips to her neck and kissed her. He could feel the blood rushing to her face as she blushed. Not yet, he told himself, as he pulled away from her neck.

A soothing male voice began to drone. “Welcome to Trees and plant life from around the nation. The first state we will be looking at is Arkansas…” Ryane groaned as she shifted in his arms. 

After Ryane finished her ice cream, she rested her head on his chest while he gently toyed with her hair. She began to nod off, but her phone dinged. She fished it out of her pocket and looked at it.

“Is everything okay?” Quinn asked.

“My manager, Jacob, invited me to this work party at a bar. Do you want to tag along?”

“I would love that!” he said.

“How much longer is this?” she groaned. 

He smiled. “I think I’ve made my point,” he said, turning off the TV and releasing her.

“Thank god!” she said, getting up and stretching.

***

Later that night they pulled up to the bar in Sutton, a few blocks from where she worked. The blue neon sign that read Brickstone Bar flickered. As they stepped inside, Quinn nearly gagged on the musty air that smelled heavily of smoke and body odor. A dozen grimy guys stood around, chugging beer. “Are these your co-workers?” Quinn asked.

“Sort of,” she said.

“Ryane!” Jeff called, waving her over.

Quinn looked to Ryane, who smiled back. He followed her to the boy with blond curls.

“Glad you could make it!” Jeff said, pulling her in for a quick hug. “Oh my god! Is this the one you told me about?” he asked with an excited gasp.

“Yes. Quinn, this is Jeff, my co-worker. Jeff, this is Quinn, my boyfriend.”

Quinn relaxed, smiling at being called her boyfriend. “Nice to meet you!” he said, shaking Jeff’s hand.

Jeff passed them both a beer off the counter. “Aren’t you a bit... young to be drinking?” Quinn asked.

“Yup,” he said, taking a sip of his beer. “But my dad owns this bar and doesn’t really care what I do... as long as I don’t end up in prison. He’s very much a hands-off type.”

“His dad is also good friends with George, the guy who owns where I work.”

“I see...”

“Incoming!” Jeff said, gesturing to Jacob, walking towards them. Quinn put an arm around Ryane, pulling her close, giving Jacob an icy stare.

                   “Glad you could make it, Ryane,” Jacob said with a wide grin, but it quickly faded when he looked at Quinn. “Is this your boy toy?”

                   Ryane rolled her eyes. “Don’t be a dick, Jacob,” she snapped.

        “Come on, cutie. I’m just messin’.”

“Whatever. I’m going to head to the bathroom,” she said, slipping away.

        “I just need her for a short while to make my ex jealous,” Jacob said, when she was out of earshot. “Just for ten minutes.”

“Get a life, would you!” Jeff snapped. “You and Kelly have the unhealthiest relationship! Grow up!”

Quinn furrowed his brow. “I’m sorry, are you asking for my permission to borrow Ryane?”

“Well…” Jacob stammered.

“That is exactly what happened,” Jeff interjected. A hint of a smile twitched on Quinn’s lips. He was starting to like Jeff.

 “I sincerely hope for your sake you’re not serious,” Quinn said, slowly, drilling Jacob with a cold stare. “She clearly has no desire to take part in this sick game of yours. Stay away from her.”

Jacob pursed his lips as he slithered away.

 “Do I want to know what that was about?” Ryane asked when she returned.

“Just Jacob being his usual douchey self,” Jeff said dismissively.

“This is normal?” Quinn sputtered.

“Unfortunately, yes,” Ryane said.

“Jacob!” a shrill voice screeched.

Ryane quickly pulled Quinn to a corner, out of the line of fire. Kelly marched to Jacob, grabbing a glass of beer, which she threw in his face. Jeff and Ryane had to stifle their laughter. Quinn looked at them confused.

“Shouldn’t someone do something?” he asked.

“Nah. It’s better not to get in the way,” Jeff said.

“How dare you!? You invited her!” Kelly said, pointing to Ryane. “And not me!”

“Kelly, you can have him! I don’t want him!” Ryane said.

Kelly launched the glass in Ryane’s direction, but Quinn caught it. “Don’t ever do that again!” he snarled.

“Nice catch, man!” Jeff said.

“And who’s this?” Kelly demanded.

“My boyfriend!” Ryane fired back.

Kelly paused and looked Quinn up and down. “Really?” Ryane nodded. Kelly turned her attention back to Jacob. “You told me she was coming as your date. Why did you lie to me?” she demanded.

“I wanted to make you jealous!” he snapped. “Happy now?”

She smiled. “Seriously? You wanted to make me jealous?” she asked, twisting a strand of hair around on her finger.

“Yes!”

She approached him and kissed him. They disappeared to the back room. There was a rumble of laughter as things settled down.

“They break up five times a week minimum,” Ryane said.

“That’s not… healthy,” Quinn said.

“I know,” Ryane said. “They have been this way ever since I met them.”

“Five bucks says they last an hour,” Jeff said.

“Half hour,” Ryane replied.

Jeff looked to Quinn. “I’ll pass,” he said politely. Jeff and Ryane shook on it. 

        An hour later the sound of breaking glass could be heard. “Hand it over,” Jeff said, with a wicked grin. Ryane huffed and pulled a five from her pocket and handed it to him.

“I’ll get you another drink,” Quinn said, taking her glass to the bar.

Jacob made his way to her. “What now?” Ryane demanded.

He sighed. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry about her.”

She rolled her eyes at his insincere tone. “You should be sorry for always dragging me in the middle of your childish fights!” she snapped.

 “Ryane, please. I really am sorry,” he said as he leaned in and reached around her waist. A sharp snap could be heard before his hand touched her. Jacob cried out in pain as he held up a limp wrist. Quinn stood next to him with a dark expression.

“Next time it comes off.”

“What the fuck!” Jeff sputtered. “Did you just break his wrist?” 

“He deserved it,” Quinn said, as he dragged Ryane out. When they were outside, he stopped walking and faced her. “I don’t like you talking to him. I don’t want him near you.”

“I can’t risk losing my job! I don’t have endless money like some people!” she blurted out.

His eyes flashed with anger as he pulled her close, securing one arm around her waist. “Listen to me very carefully Ryane. Youare mine,” he said gently, but his voice was strained. “No one touches you like that.”

He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. She found herself petrified by his gaze. He put a hand on the back of her neck and pressed his lips against hers. Her body stiffened as a shockwave rippled through her. She slowly relaxed, and parted her lips, leaning into the kiss. He traced the outside of her mouth with his tongue then pulled back to study her face.

“Jacob is not safe,” he said, softly.

She laughed nervously. “Are you safe?”

A hint of an amused smile played on the corner of his lips. He kissed her cheek, letting his lips linger. “I’ll protect you,” he said soothingly.

Her fears melted away with his words. “Okay,” she said.

“We should get to the car,” he said. As they hopped in, he said, “I don’t want to take you home.” 

“Huh?”

“I want to bring you to my house. I don’t like the idea of you waking up alone. I want to keep you close so I can be there.”

“You don’t want this,” she said looking up at him with a chilling gaze.

“That’s for me to decide,” he snarled.

She let out a breath, her shoulders relaxing. “I know that I scare a lot of people,” she said, voice breaking.

“You’re five feet tall! Why on earth would anyone be afraid of you?”

“They’re scared of my anxiety attacks. Big emotions can be scary even when they’re not yours.”

“Well, I’m not scared of you, and you’re coming home with me. That’s that.”

“Is this a kidnapping?” she joked nervously.

“The only difference between two friends hanging out and a kidnapping is that in the latter scenario one friend doesn’t want to and the other doesn’t care,” he replied. “So, I guess it’s up to you if this is a kidnapping or not,” he said, smoothly.

“Sure,” she said, heavy sarcasm coating her words to cover up the anxiety forming in her.

He gave her hand a comforting squeeze. “It’s going to be okay,” he said.

She smiled at him, letting herself relax. Even as the realization that there would be no going back sunk in, she felt safe.

***

Quinn went to the living room, opened his briefcase and took out the contract and began reading over it. He didn’t get far before his phone rang. He picked up.

“Hey. We need to talk,” Lucas said. “Meet me by the old bridge. I have something to show you.”

He soon arrived at the old bridge where Lucas was taking pictures. A black backpack was slung over his shoulder.

“What’s this about?” Quinn asked.

“Let’s grab something to eat first. There’s a small tent city close by.”

“Alright,” he said, following Lucas into the woods. As they reached the tents, they could see some people sitting around a campfire. Lucas snapped a few pictures then drew his axe.

“After you,” Lucas said, cracking his neck to the side and rolling back his shoulders. As Quinn and Lucas appeared next to the people around the fire, time seemed to slow down, and everyone was frozen in place.

“The knees, Lucas! The knees! You’re so wasteful!” Quinn chided, appearing next to a man, sitting by a fire. He swiftly snapped the man’s neck.

“You know that’s not my style!” Lucas replied, slicing a woman’s head off.

“You always make such a mess!” Quinn quipped, pivoting to snap another neck. “It’s such a waste of blood!”

“I don’t care! This is so much more fun!” He whipped around, slicing someone in half.

 Within 20 seconds it was over. Most of the homeless people were dead or bleeding out. Quinn took a deep breath to calm the exhilaration coursing through him. Lucas took out the draining tools, needles, pumps, and blood bags, and tossed them to Quinn. They all looked like something you would see at a hospital. They went from person to person, draining them. On average each person took about 8.6 seconds to drain.

As Quinn knelt to insert the tubes into a girl with a gaping wound in her stomach, she groaned, and her head fell to the side. It was the one he had given the $100 to. Her face was pinched in anguish. Her eyes inched open. She whimpered as her muscles went rigid, but she broke into a radiant smile.

“James, you came for me. You didn’t give up.”

“Uh…” he stuttered as he tried to form words. “I think you are mistaken. I’m not James.”

“Of course, you are. You said you would come for me and here you are.” She coughed up blood, but he dodged the spatter.

“This will all be over soon,” he said, keeping his gaze locked with hers. He smoothed her blood-soaked hair out of her face. “You’ll find peace... I promise.” He brought his lips to hers, feeling her body relax under his. He pulled back and in one swift motion, snapped her neck. He tried to ignore the lump in his throat and the tears that threatened to spill over.

“Did you just give her a Judas kiss?” Lucas asked from behind him.

He jumped and hurriedly wiped his eyes. “Uh... yeah,” he said, voice hoarse.

“Come on. While you were coddling this one, I got the leftovers,” he said, holding two handfuls of blood bags. “But now I need to show you something. Come with me.”

Quinn reluctantly got up and followed him. They sat on a log, and Lucas took out a large photo album and held up a picture. It was of a body dangling from the ceiling upside down and Quinn leaning in as if about to do a Spiderman kiss. 

“Do you remember this?” Lucas asked.

Quinn smiled and nodded. “We saw Spiderman and then went out to eat.”

“What about this one?” Lucas asked, holding up another. It showed Quinn and Lucas smiling, with a burning house in the back.

“That was a fun one!”

“It was like a buffet,” Lucas chimed in.

“Why are you showing me this?” Quinn asked.

“I don’t want you to forget what you are. If you insist on keeping this human around, fine. But don’t get too soft. Don’t trust her! And don’t let her be alone with me.”

“I won’t.”

“What are you going to do if she tries to leave?” Lucas asked, breaking the silence.

“She’s not in a position where she can. I made sure of that.” He held up his key fob and grinned.

Lucas sighed. “If she gets to your heart before you get to hers, you’re finished, you know.”

 A heavy silence descended on them. As they walked down the darkened street, they saw someone standing by the corner. 

“Huh... he doesn’t smell human,” Quinn commented as they approached him.

“Hello, fellow vampires!” a slender man with copper hair and dull red eyes said, stepping in front of them.

“A vegan,” Quinn muttered under his breath.

“I’m Danny, and I am with the Alternative Sustenance Society.”

“A.S.S. for short,” Lucas quipped. “How fitting.”

Danny rolled his eyes. “We’re giving away free samples,” he said gesturing to a cage filled with guinea pigs. 

Lucas clenched his fists as his body shook from rage. He swiped the fliers Danny was holding and pushed him against a light pole. He struggled to get away but couldn’t. 

Lucas smiled cruelly. “You’re not strong enough to fight me because of your special diet.” He forced the fliers into his mouth and down his throat.

“Good thing you don’t need to breathe,” Quinn sneered, bending down to unlock the cage. The guinea pigs scattered. 

“Stay away from our territory!” Lucas snarled. He smashed his fist into Danny’s face and smiled as he crumpled to the ground. “If you see humans as anything more than walking blood bags, you will be vulnerable! We are vampires! We are dangerous predators and we kill humans! If you wish to die with a stake through your heart, be my guest,” he said.

Quinn kicked Danny in the gut as he followed Lucas. “I’m surprised you didn’t want to join them,” he said, with an edge to his voice. Want more?

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[fountainpenguin]

So I'm genuinely curious over how Leonard is one of your favorite characters in the series. In both Pahkitew and RR, he was around for only one episode with his shtick being that he took larpring so seriously that he legit thought they he was a wizard with that mentality being the reason why he was the first to be eliminated in both series.

Yes, and he SOLD IT. I'm a fanfic writer and I'll always fall for the characters who are legitimately fun to write. I would make him a main character in a story any day (and have, and they're some of my faves). I actually use Leonard as my base inspiration for several characters even in my current fanfics because he is THAT strong of a character (to me).

He's a shameless, charismatic sweetheart of a team leader who will grab fast food with you, spill all his secrets, and give you the world unless you mildly inconvenience him, and then he'll instantly swivel to "Wow, I literally do not respect anything about you :)" and I'm in love with it.

Also I'm just gonna say it: I will ALWAYS go for the character who wants to summon a dragon to destroy everyone who's ever wronged him. Leonard is SO conflict avoidant but also he's down for everyone who's ever been mildly rude to him to suffer a horrific death. Do not excuse him from his crimes; we all saw him make multiple attempts to commit murder. Smh.

This is the same guy who throws confetti when he's excited. The duality of man. He WILL dance on your grave.

This is Leonard's actual audition tape. This is what he submitted to the producers. It's him complaining about how someone stole his unicycle. Why did he submit this? Why is he like this? Love him.

(Cnt'd Leonard ramblings under the cut. You will regret this.)

It's the way he chuckles at his friend and takes a moment to clarify that no, he's not made of paper. Like. If his friend asked him to come over and then the follow-up question was "Are you made of paper?" then you know this is someone in Leonard's friend group and you know he was 100% willing to whip out his unicycle and go to his friend's house in his full LARPing gear. He has no fear of judgment, no shame, and he must have incredible balance and I just think that's fun. This boy lives for himself. I love characters who are unapologetically all-in with what they love and who they are.

It's the way he says "I'm making a video" as if he's just... doing something unimportant. WHY did he submit this? He's already set up as this character who brushes off the professional side of the competition in favor of doing whatever the heck he wants, and that's hilarious. The amount of confidence he oozes every time he's onscreen is just... palpable. We know he was canonically bullied in school, but man oh man, that clearly does not stop him. He fears nothing and I fear him.

Most of the characters let Chris push them around because they'll do whatever it takes to move to the next episode and try to win a million dollars. Leonard is ONLY here to play and make friends. He made the active choice to be stubborn and throw away his chance at the money because if he couldn't play the game his way (in character) then he didn't want to play at all. And that is so interesting.

Look at his bedroom. Look at how into this aesthetic he is. He's heating a cauldron on an electric burner. He's got candles. He's got scrolls and a crystal ball. He's got so many books. He LOVES what he does and he's unapologetic for it. He's so authentic and pure and good and I love him for it.

Leonard runs around in his full-on robes, his fake beard, and... converse shoes. He's committed to the outfit in so many ways but he needs comfy shoes to be happy and I respect that.

Look how cute he is... his body language is just. fun. Just stands there all smiles while his girlfriend throws confetti. Having a fantastic day.

Then that next scene where Tammy keeps throwing confetti on him and he just stands there with his eyes pinched shut and he's trying not to hurt her feelings is... super cute.

Leonard brings a "Let's have a good attitude and be loyal and friendly" vibe to the team that Dave specifically cannot stand. Every single other person on that team liked Leonard. Dave is just mean.

Leonard's first interaction with Dave was walking up to him and trying to cleanse him of evil, which is so funny to me. Dave is "the normal guy," Max was sitting right next to him and just gave his spiel about how evil he was, and Leonard took one look at Dave, who was sitting there and doing nothing, and said "No, THIS is the one who needs cleansing." Absolutely savage (and he was right).

His parachute failed. Everyone else is screaming. Leonard shows no fear. Tries to save himself with magic. He has a whole spell book. Went straight for the wing spell. Still falling to his doom. Just chilling. His commitment to the bit is unparalleled and I love him.

Leonard's super compassionate, I think... Threw himself in front of Dave and ordered him to crawl to safety, then grabbed a weapon and readied himself to face his enemies. Leonard is way more dramatic than he needs to be, but you can tell he's super loyal because he's willing to put himself in the line of fire for others. For no reason.

We know Leonard watched the OG Total Drama series, because he grabs a pipe, whips it above his head, and tells Chef to "go back to the shadows of Wawanakwa." Sure, we can assume most of the contestants watched the previous series before they auditioned, but I appreciate it for Leonard specifically because he really looked at this show and said "Yes, this is a smart place for me to go LARPing." Considering how he threw in the towel in episode 2, refusing to break character, I think he watched the previous episodes and thought he would meet like-minded nerds rather than compete for money. He wanted to make friends :(

Leonard gets a bad rap for being bullied and unlikable, but like... he's SO charismatic. He's a natural leader who speaks up when he has ideas. Sugar, Ella, and Beardo are all over him immediately. Sky turns to him and asks him to take charge and when Leonard suggests linking arms and chanting in order to build a tower, Sky and Shawn are among those who cheer. Episode 1 Leonard was everybody's sweetheart <3

Leonard's not "the weird kid nobody likes." He's the flippin' team leader. And he did exactly what he promised to do, which was lead the team to build a wizard's tower (It's not his fault he didn't expect a moose stampede to knock it down).

Dave is a GROUCH in episode 1 and straight-up mocked the tower in front of Leonard, and Leonard is still all smiles and love and hugs. You can NOT fight Leonard's commitment to purity and sweetness. You will lose. I love him so much.

Leonard is SO silly. He keeps getting in so many risky situations and walking away unscathed, and every single time he's like, "Yeah, I was fine because I'm awesome." I just think he's fun.

Leonard is just so ??? /gestures. He climbs on rocks and stands on them. Just because he can. He just kinda... touches things. And plays. Loves telling stories. Loves having fun.

It's the way that all his teammates are complaining about how they had to sleep on rocks last night, and Leonard rolls his eyes with a massive smirk on his face and says "Pfft. I levitated all night." Like. Why is he committing to this? He makes me laugh.

[It's the same subtle sass he flings around in R-Race when he has no trouble riding his camel and others are struggling. It's so uncalled for. He's just sassy sometimes.]

It's the way that Ella confuses even Leonard. Why is Leonard SO into his LARPing characterization but he still just... stares at Ella like he doesn't "get" her? He does this multiple times. They are not on the same wavelength. They do not vibe. It's SO funny to me because you would expect those two to adore each other, but... Ella likes being his cheerleader and Leonard's just kinda... not into it.

It's the way Leonard gets flattered when Sugar compliments him and then glares at Dave when Dave comes out swinging with his unrestrained Leonard hatred. Leonard doesn't get snippy with him. Ever. Even when Dave literally screams in his face that he thinks Leonard is useless. Leonard doesn't bat an EYE. Doesn't flinch. Just stares him down. Leonard never snaps, but always puts up with it... that character type always speaks to me. idk man. There's something about characters who simmer in silence, especially when you know how wild they can be, that always hooks me.

It's the way that Leonard has his little hand symbol that he keeps using over and over. Leonard was MADE to be eliminated early, that's his entire purpose in the show... he IS cannon fodder, but I think it's cute that he still had his own special body language.

It's the way Leonard was so shocked that he was in the bottom two on elimination night. It's the way he curled up, hugging himself and pleading to not be chosen. I just think he's cute. It's the way Leonard, who is SO TALL, gets thrown over Chef's shoulder like a sack of potatoes and Leonard just kinda... wails and stretches his arm back towards the campfire. He's baby.

Listen, I know his final act was attempted murder but he's innocent, your honor. Yes, I know he also tried to commit murder in R-Race but I demand you free my man. He did nothing wrong.

My favorite characters are the ones that are fun to write and/or practically write themselves. You get one taste of Leonard and that's all you need. He ingrains himself in your mind. You can have him do anything you want and you're right. That's the best kind of character when you're writing fanfics.

This one's probably not going to show up well, but here's a screenshot from my 'fic "The Story Where Courtney Takes Feral Zeke to Prom" (dA title; "Precious" on FFN)

He's just. Leonard. He is SO funny. Just delightful.

Leonard can be swayed to do anything as long as it's fun. And he's a charismatic leader who can sway others to play along with him, especially in a post-elimination fanfic. He is bubbly and full of adventurous spirit, and once you put him back in a non-competitive environment where everyone's a little bit bored and looking for ways to stay entertained at the elimination station, there's no doubt in my mind that everyone would love him again.

He's NICE. He's FUN. This kid knows how to research. He knows how to reach out to people. He'll fight for you. He'll throw himself in the line of fire for you. He just wants to play and be your friend. He's a charismatic sweetheart and I like him. You will never write yourself into a corner as long as you have Leonard in the vicinity. He's too big and loud and will fight anything.

I adored Leonard so much already, and then R-Race drops and we find out he has a girlfriend?? And they met when they were stuffed inside the same locker?? And they absolutely adore each other?? His only critique about Tammy is that she throws too much confetti on his head?? Incredible, 10/10. Nowhere else can I get this character. When will I ever be this funny.

Seriously I cannot emphasize enough how much I love the Leonard/Tammy ship. They are SO in tune with each other. They just straight-up arrived to R-Race in full LARP gear sipping sodas. What. Right out of the gate, sets them up as the silly beans they are. You can instantly feel how much better Leonard vibes with Tammy than he did with Ella. Love that for him.

Leonard and Tammy just... love to play. They ran around the airport throwing confetti at people. That is a thing they actually did. Why are they like this. You just know their relationship is so, so good and healthy and they adore each other. When Tammy got eliminated, her first reaction was to cast a time reversal spell, which is the SAME THING Leonard did when he got eliminated in TD. I love them.

Leonard went after the outcasts in his attempts to make alliances. He went for the adversity twins and for Crimson and Ennui. Ugh. I love that. He knew nothing about them except "those are the ones who are going to struggle to have allies." He's so good.

Also, shout out to the R-Race animators for keeping Leonard's special hand gesture exactly the same in R-Race as it was in TD. That's my boy.

And if you're still not swayed, you gotta keep in mind that my niche when these seasons were airing was in writing post-elimination 'fics, told from the POV of the character first eliminated in each cast. Getting to the elimination area early cements you as "the guy who knows what's going on." Beardo was out first and he wasn't a talker, so Leonard slid right in there. Beardo's super introverted... but Leonard? Oh my goodness gracious, if you've never tried writing Leonard then you have no idea how useful to the narrative he is.

I LOVED the dynamic I wrote between those two in Beatin' Path. They instantly fell in as BFFs, because Beardo was super shy but would go along with anything Leonard wanted to do, because Leonard's charisma is off the charts and he is GOOD at making things fun. Leonard was very good at including Beardo in his play. Beardo is so good at being the sound effects hype man. They just... loved it. Had a blast. They were having fun, so I was having fun. That's the best kind of fanfic.

Look at my sons...

Look at them... They're the worst.

I love Leonard. He's so nuts.

So part of the charm IS the fact that he got out early (twice!!) and had an extremely charismatic personality. He only wants to play, so when you put him in a non-competitive environment where he is free to play, then he THRIVES.

I just play him as this super accepting, kindhearted character who wears every emotion on his sleeve. He will tell you all his secrets. Leonard has no shame. Here's one of my favorite scenes from a late chapter I never posted. This is quintessential Leonard vibes to me:

Beardo can be going through the worst possible thing and Leonard is just so charming and charismatic that it's hilarious. I love him.

?? Leonard is Unapologetically Leonard. I am so in love with his... bizarre interactions. I know I'm posting a lot, but I just have so many things I love:

I just ??? love him. He's simultaneously out of touch with reality and living in his dream LARPer world but he'll also grab sodas with you. He's so good.

One of my worldbuilding details in my Total Drama 'fics was that cartoon physics were very real, but I did it in a silly way. Everyone had one specific "gift" that they grew into during puberty (and Cody giving Beth "the Talk" about this was the subject of my one-shot "Of Ants and Cartoon Physics").

Leonard's gift was that he had an inventory and I also wrote him as a kleptomaniac. And it was SO fun. I LOVE Leonard.

Like, I just wrote Leonard picking up random things and putting them in his sleeves. Sometimes he'd just put mice in his shirt and they would go into the void. He was the only character who had an inventory. He ran around with knives. It was lots of fun.

On a side note, the biggest reason why I stopped working on my R-Race elimination story (Lions Under Palm Trees) wasn't lack of time or passion, but... there's an entire arc about Junior hitting puberty and coming into his cartoon physics gift, which was generating extreme amounts of static electricity. I LOVE what I did with it, but I just kept dwelling on my 'fic and getting nervous that I had taken it too far beyond canon and people would be weirded out, especially since I was already making my POV characters two people the fandom had no love for.

Technically the gifts I gave characters match things that happen in canon (ex: Heather's gift was that she has retractable nail-claws, which she actually did in the New York episode of World Tour). Zeke's gift was that he's immune to food poisoning, which iirc was based on his character interview where he explains that he has a strong stomach, combined with the fact that it's implied he's had to live off raw rats in World Tour and possibly other seasons too. So my things were based in canon... I just felt like people would be turned off that there was SO. MUCH. of that kind of stuff in this 'fic. It kind of took over the plot and I just couldn't decide if that was the vibe.

But I'd go back to my Leonard 'fics in a heartbeat if I had the time. There are some NASTY hard-hitting moments in there and I love them so much. Leonard is an angel. I mean he's the worst but I love him. Topher is a menace. Tammy makes bad choices. Ugh. I love it.

I love Leonard...

[danganronpasurvivoraskblog]

I don't want to sound rude and hasty but I'm not sure whether you forgot so I'm just gonna put this here. I also added one more part. This is in reference to the girls dom or sub chart.

1. Sakura's a sub? I mean, I know she said "I too have a heart of a woman" and she was legit embarrassed about being girly before but I kinda feel that Sakura was so stoic that she's neither sub or dom. She's just awesome. 2. Aoi kinda strikes me as both sub and dom. She's definitely a dom to Togami in that she's definitely not gonna let him have his way in any regard but at the same time, in terms of all encompassing general-ness, in terms of romance, Aoi is super embarrassed and shy about it. 3. I have no problem with Maki's position. But I do say she has a big soft spot when Kaito's there. 4. Peko should get a second placement just for a joke. In terms of her love of animals, especially Nyahiru, she should be a Super Dom. 5. I kinda feel Sayaka should be normal Dom cuz while I do see her being super flirty and mischievous and teasing to all of her shojo manga harem, I've definitely seen her easily uno reversed by Makoto and Kyoko and she becomes a embarrassed meek mess. Sayaka's a bit weak to sly romantic affection/teasing herself. 6. I know Narumi's a Literal Kid but you sure she's not already a bonafide Bitch? And 7. I might be wrong but I think I don't see Hiyoko on the chart.

//Okay so this is relating back to the sub/dom list I made for the characters, and the original ask you sent got buried in the box somewhere, so I’m gonna answer it here while I have the chance randomly.

Sakura is a sub WILLINGLY. I feel I should have clarified this because Sakura could absolutely be the dom of doms on this list, but it’s less to do with strength and more to do with the fact that she is (usually) a pretty gentle and sweet person. So in this sort of situation, while she COULD take the lead, she’s very much rather go at her partners pace. After all, I feel she’d be pretty used to people finding her intimidating.

This is true, but from the perspective of Hina’s relationship with Byakuya in general, not just romantically or sexually, they are both characters known for being competitive. One thing that makes their dynamic so interesting is they are competitive people, but are two very different kinds of sports. Hina is a friendly athlete who loves the thrill of the game more than the victory, and is in the scene to make friends, live life, and have fun, but Byakuya on the other hand is driven by a strong desire to be on top alone, and isn’t afraid to kick people down to get there. Put them together in this sort of situation, and the end result is…interesting to say the least.

I think it’s safe to say Kaimaki are switches. Kaito and Maki both feel like they would TRY to be doms, but they are very soft with each other, at least more than they are with other people.

I know this is a joke, but I am constantly feeling the need to remind people that Peko likes petting fluffy creatures, and the reason why she is so crazy over them is because they are usually so intimidated by her intense aura that they don’t approach her (and Nyahiru is scared of her for a very similar reason). Peko does not want to FUCK a fluffy animal. She’s a fur-lover, not a furRY.

Okay, you know what? This is fair. Giving it a bit of thought, it’s hilarious because in the Naegibowl, Sayaka is actually all three. She’s a dom for Makoto, a sub for Kyoko, and a switch for Mukuro because Mukuro is normally really shy, but if she decides to take the lead, Sayaka couldn’t fucking do ANYTHING to stop her and her ripped as hell abs.

Okay, yes she is, but I tried not to include the characters who have been stated to be young. At this point, Narumi IS 16, but I didn’t want to chance it.

I’ll have to go back and check, but in case Hiyoko isn’t there, she’s definitely a dom; at least in her current relationship.

-Mod

[theliterarywolf]

Really sorry for my actions as well. Wasn't meant to make it sound like gossip. I was legit confused with the discourse.

Okay, now, see... Let me use this ask to clarify some things.

Clarification on miscommunication within the indie sphere of things is fine. Things like 'Oh, did you see that Viv dropped the titles of all the remaining episode titles for S2 of Helluva Boss?' That's cool.

'Hey, I see you follow Sam Fennah, what did you think of Amygdala?' or 'Does it feel like it's been a while since we've heard anything about Dream BBQ? I hope it's still coming out?' Those would also be fine.

The things that I've been getting tired of are people popping in with 'oh, can you believe that they're making X character black in this live-action adaptation?' Because of course I can. That's the modus operandi of every live-action demake that's come out in the last decade and we know it's done as a pitiful attempt for a diversity-quota at best and downright racist at worst so we need to get better at ignoring them so they flop.

[lanawinterscigarettes]

don’t you worry once July hits I will have no life because im chronically ill so I’ll be unemployed <3 be prepared for 25 star anon asks a day whoop whoop also you joke about running off into the sunset being my dream but legit after reading that under the table fic that you wrote it made me like, wish I could have a girlfriend so bad and do all the simple domestic stuff you do with guys just with a girl and I know it’ll never happen irl but at least I can escape in fiction <3 - ⭐️

Omg star anon not the little heart after that statement 😭 you crack me up sometimes (/affectionate also if you don't know what that means it's basically when you amuse someone or make them laugh, idk if you have the term "crack someone up" in the uk so I just wanted to clarify so you weren't confused) and I love get 25 star anon asks a day!! I remember one time when I popped into the tumblrverse and had five or six asks from four different anons including you and I was tickled pink hehe 🥰 I get that so much though like I'd love to have a partner but I have attachment issues and difficulty with intimacy and all sorts of other stuff ugh but that's why it's good to be able to escape into fics when it's needed 💞

(also not to be annoying or anything but I didn't know if you read this clara fic that I posted most recently yet and just wanted to let you know about it in case you hadn't because I think it has some of the domestic goodness that you're looking for okay bye)

[softness-and-shattering]

Some general advice re avoiding scams. I havent finished the article but I can see she keeps making the same mistakes.

1. Youre not too smart, privileged whatever to fall for a scam. Believing you are makes you more susceptible.

2. Verify. Eg they said theres a warrant out for her arrest. She googled it and nothing came up but she didnt know if that was public information. Honestly I dont know that either. But, you ask a lawyer, call a police station maybe, look for a legal aid organisation. Dont say its for yourself. Say youve been told about an arrest warrant and youre trying to verify it.

Eg they pointed her to a gov websige and then 'called her from that number'. That can be spoofed. You put down the phone, and from your device call the official number, tell them youve been contacted, and if its legit, youve called the org you indeoendently found their number. This lady, rhey keep giving her numbers to call and telling her whos on the other end with no evidence. A string of numbers a visual id doesnt mean anything alone, it exists as verification so you need to verify it. Anyone can give you q string of numbers and call it a case number.

Basically dont let them coordinate communication and verification. Put down the phone and contact the agencies they claim to represent with information they have not given you.

Also worth pointing out their general manipulation, cant trust anyone, we know about your kid, you have to listen or you'll be arrested. Keeping them om thr phome at all times. They mightve sent someone to follow her down the street to further scare her. Its designed to make you panic so you stop thinking logically and just obey them. You always have to stop and think.

Like I get texts demanding I clarify my address for mail that hasnt been correctly addressed. If I regularly bought stuff online I might qssume it was something I ordered, but I almost never do so I know I dont have a package stuck. Someone just wants me to give them my address, theyre probably sending texts to randomly generated nunvers and seeing if anyone responds.

"A car in texas w drugs registered in your name" contact the dmv and check whats registered in your name. Independently verify everything.

really important financial advice: if a bank employee hands you a printout on scam and fraud tactics because you made a big withdrawal from your savings suddenly then you should maybe consider listening to your bank and question if you're being scammed by someone

related observation: idk maybe if your bank says "make sure this isn't fraud you're being pressured into!! Here's what to look out for!!!" And you go "hm. well that's not important," and then go right ahead to hand over $50,000 in a shoebox to someone you were told is an undercover CIA agent

—then maybe you shouldn't be considered qualified to write a financial advice column.

[cooloddball]

You said, j2 are also not ashamed to share their weird-ass stories with each other. It's not a competition, but do Jensen and Misha share the same stories with each other?

Sometimes it's hard to decipher whether some asks are meant to be wank or whether they are genuine. But let me give you the benefit of the doubt and just answer.

Jensen and Misha almost never share about hanging out outside of work.

Long before I joined this fandom and even now, there was speculation that Jensen hated Misha because there were never photos or any evidence that they were friends outside of work. To date, antis use that as their only argument against cockles. However, their arguments are moot and here's why:

Jensen and Misha hang out outside work.

For a long time, the anti-cockles brigade believed that Jensen went to Vatican with Jarpad as a romantic getaway. It gets funnier, apparently, they ditched Misha and left him with rest of the cast to tour Rome alone. The truth was revealed in a EW interview where Jensen and Misha reminisce about that tour that Dee (aww, she's wife goals) had organized for the two of them. The mass was conducted under the Michelangelo mural of Michael slaying Lucifer.

Now the strange thing about the whole thing is that years ago. I think in 2011, Jensen told the story of how he went with friends for a private mass at the Vatican. So why didn't he say it was Misha? I mean if he had gone with Jarpad, Jason or Steve or anyone else he would've said it. So did they have a private wedding or? Like why hide who he went with just to reveal it years later? Not sus at all.

When West Misha's son fell IN Jensen's pool and hit his head. Jensen and Misha dived in to save him.

That time West peed in Jensen's flower bed.

West being Dee's best friend.

When Dee said Misha and Vicki helped with the brewery.

The things they do with each other are just not not gay

I mean explain how this is dude bro behaviour to me.

Or this or this

That time Misha showed Jensen his crotch and Jensen almost swallowed his tongue. Then Misha was late for his panel.

Or that time Jensen lay down so Misha could straddle him and he got a boner. Like, is that normal behaviour among friends to you?

Or that time Misha took that topless photo of Jensen 👀

They can't tell us when they hang out because when they hang out they don't do things that just friends do.

I mean J/2 are not ashamed to say they shared underwear that one time but cockles sharing clothes became a whole spectacle.

J/2 joke all the time about how they are in love even on Magazines and the journalists know they are joking but cockles never joke about it. Like this interview with CNN about the show ending when they joked about falling in love with each other:

Remember that time Jensen told Misha he loved him on MTV?

The many times Jarpad has teased them about their relationship?

Their castmates implying that cockles is a thing.

People who visit the set saying that cockles are always so close together, moving together, sitting together while Jarpad is on his own. Hmm...wonder why.

I could spend eternity here trying to prove something that is so blatant so I'll end it here but I hope you get my point.

[empressofdiamonds]

LOW VALUE MALES and how to understand them.

Keeping in mind "sex is the end goal of LVM" and "LVM won't care about women's emotions and will leverage them for their end goal" helps clarify tremendously their modus operandi. If you don't wanna read all this post, re-read this first post and scroll down. That's all there is.

LVM will pretend relationship for the sake of sex, they won't even be willing to put in effort and care into the relationship, just enough so they can access sex. And once dumped they'll crawl and cry so hard and pretend they'll improve themselves but it's all for the sake of sex.

They're literal slaves to their dick. They WANT to get it wet. The Dick Must be Wet.

LVM don't see women as their equal... and wont change their minds. They see women as possessions instead of humans. They won't care about what women desire want need deserve, because they see those things as obstacles to sex, so he'll cut corners just to get his dikk wet. Like "huh, why bother romancing her, I'm doing bare minimum and she's willing to give me sex, anything beyond that is useless

They're cheapos. They'll do hangouts, fake dates (that's what I call cheapo easy fake-romancey dates, like walk dates, park dates, starry night dates, home movie dates, etc), they'll pinch their pennies when it comes to dating... Because they simply aren't sure if the sex will be there. They aren't sure, so why the hell spend this much cash, Jessica Neighbor might have better odds than Joanna Doe? They'll litterally do a mental risk/perk calculation. To give you an idea, an escort's time is 600$+ in major cities, they're happy to pay for that, but will screech at the idea of paying 40$ for a nice dinner with a glammed up lady (that is ACTUALLY into them).

They loathe effort and energy, and they loathe making others feel good without expecting anything back. Let's say you're a LVM. Your average Joanna Doe, you romance her, you bring her to cute cafes, you get through boring discussions about future (you legit don't give a F about that, she's not the one and you know it), and you future fake her, you recourse to lowly strategies to make her think there's something going on. Joanna invests more of her time into you, she opens up more and more, after 1-2 weeks you bring her to fake dates, increase the intimacy, slowly push her boundaries, then tada sexxx.

They'll recourse to immoral strategies without any personal issues. It brings us back to point 4; they don't see women as people to respect. Respecting women to them is optional, and they do it begrudgingly to not be seen as absolute assholes... This is bringing us back to the previous point's LVM example: Uh oh? Joanna Doe doesn't wants to have sex? You'll start doing guilt trips, push her into sex, say that she's weird, or maybe increase the romance fake talk, say she's the Number One and that you Know You'll Spend Your Life With Her, She's So Special. You lovebomb her, you talk of everything you think women love. Litterally you'll trow anything until it sticks.

To LVM, dating IS a numbers game. They more they'll ask women out, past exes, former classmates, anything goes, the more odds of having sex. So that's a win move for LVM. They are motivated by sex, and don't give a shit about women's emotions, they're annoyances. LVM will also have a bunch of women they talk to at the same time. But no, Joanna is the "only one he's talking to". They'll lie their asses off if that means protecting their odds of having sex.

If a LVM thinks sex might happen soon, he'll persevere the masquerade. But most aren't that endurant. A lot drop it after 3-4 weeks, the most endurant hold on for 2 months or something like that. Say no. Insist that you don't want to engage in sex and that you want to take it slow. Pump those damn BRAKES!

The instant you whiff anything LVM, dump. Don't even feel bad. LVM are EVERYWHERE. You'll find other men out there easy. They're rich, poor, prestigious, rednecks, academic, blue collar, whatever, they're everywhere. But their $$$$ or their network isn't worth a miserable lifetime. NEXT!!

[1101001]

THE GIRL WHO FLEW DOWN THE STAIRS _

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

‘ the story of akashi meeting you and all the events after that made him realize he was falling for you ’

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

character .. akashi seijuurou

word count .. 1.3k

tags .. fem!reader who is energetic but also thoughtful and likes to learn (as requested) , lowkey pining? , s h o g i , written from akashi pov , requested by the lovely bean anon <3 

Akashi’s first impression of you wasn’t anything bad. It wasn’t exactly good either. It was certainly memorable though. ‘The girl who flew down the stairs, knocking him onto the ground, and landing on top of him with a thump’ is how he remembers you. 

The moment was almost cliche. If your eyes had met and lingered on each other, both aware of the position you were in but not moving away, then it possibly would’ve been a scene straight out of some cheesy romance novel. 

Instead, you seemingly bounced straight up upon impact, not even bothering to spare Akashi a second glance. You proceeded to give him a quick apology, running down the next flight of stairs immediately after.

It was definitely one of the odder interactions Akashi had with his fellow students at Rakuzan High, but it amused him nonetheless and made him notice you much more often around campus. Even though you weren’t in any apparent rush anymore, you still radiated this energy that was all bubbly and seemingly ready to burst. 

It brought a small smile on his face every time he saw you, bouncing along hallways without a care in the world, chattering away with your friends. Sure you seemed like the typical happy-go-lucky person, but Akashi couldn’t help but see you as a bit more unique.

Your second interaction with Akashi was an interesting one too, in Akashi’s opinion at least. 

The basketball team had just won a tournament the other day, so Akashi was free this afternoon. He had decided to go challenge some shogi club members to a few games. 

In the middle of one of those games, you walked into the club room.

Akashi didn’t think you were part of the club, and his suspicions were confirmed when another member of the club went to ask if you needed anything. Akashi was definitely not eavesdropping, no he was paying attention to his game (the one he knew he would easily win anyway) when you pulled out an envelope and he happened to overhear you telling the club member that someone asked to meet you. 

Nobody in the room came forward to claim they were the one who sent the letter though. 

After a few awkward, silent moments, you moved to take a seat with some of the other club members. It was an action that surprised Akashi. He figured you would’ve just left because the whole did seem like a waste of time. However, you just sat there asking some club members to teach you how to play. 

Akashi could sense genuine curiosity in you and, needless to say, it intrigued him. It seems like there’s more to the “girl made of energy” than he originally thought.

The clock ticked, and a few rounds later, Akashi decided it was time to head home. Saying his formal goodbyes, he walked out of the clubroom. 

He didn’t expect you to come running after him, almost slamming into him again in the process. 

“You shouldn’t run around school so much, you know. You could end up bumping into people and maybe even hurting them.” The words left Akashi’s lips sounding a lot more teasing and flirtatious than he intended.

You blushed and started rambling out apologies. ‘Cute’ Akashi thought. 

His brain froze. 

Wait. Cute? How-

“Anyway um.. you left your notebook back there…” you said, holding out what was indeed his notebook out towards him.

“Oh…” was all he could say. He rarely forgot his things, especially things as important as his notebook. It seems his mind must’ve been too distracted by... other things. “Thank you L/n-san.”

He saw a slight shock on your face. “You know my name?” 

His brain froze yet again. How was he supposed to answer this question without seeming like a stalker?

“Well yes…” he started before you cut him.

“Didn’t expect the Akashi Seijuurou to know my name.”

He scoffed at that. “I think I’d know the name of the girl who jumped down the stairs and knocked me to the ground.”

“Again, I’m really sorry about that…” you said with a smile, although Akashi could see the guilt that lingered behind your eyes.

“Don’t worry about it,” he quickly said. “I was just…”

He was just what? Flirting? Was he actually flirting? Him. Akashi Seijuurou. Flirting??

“…you know,” he finished quietly.

You didn’t say anything in response but instead looked at him with a peculiar sort of gaze. 

“Um.. hate to make things awkward by asking this but… were you the one who sent me this?” You held up the envelope Akashi saw earlier.

“No, I didn’t.”

“Oh… okay then.” Was it just Akashi’s imagination or did he hear a sliver of disappointment in your tone? “I suppose you don’t know who it is either right?”

He shook his head.

A lot of thoughts rushed through his mind. Did you actually expect him to send you a love letter? Did you hope it was him? 

He sensed you were about to leave though, so before he could regret it, he asked you, “Why do you want to know who sent it anyway?”

Your eyes widened slightly at the question.

“I understand the curiosity and wanting to know who it is but… if they didn’t show up, why are you still waiting?” He clarified.

“Akashi-san, you’ve never confessed to someone have you?”

He gave a slight nod.

“Well, I don’t see why you’d need to,” you mumbled more to yourself than him. Clearing your throat, you continued, “The thing is, confessing takes a lot of courage. And writing this letter asking me to meet them here would’ve taken a whole lot of that courage already. I think that, if they were able to go that far, then I should at least hear them out right?”

That… surprised Akashi. 

“But then again, there’s always a possibility this is just a prank,” you added as an afterthought. 

Unsure of what to say, he just nodded. “It is possible, considering how long you had to wait.”

You smiled, “The wait was fine though. I had fun learning shogi.” 

You actually had fun learning how to play? Looking back, it did seem like you were enjoying yourself… 

It’s strange. Akashi realized just how much his view of you changed in one afternoon. Earlier, you were that bubbly, energetic girl bouncing through the halls. Now, you were this thoughtful and kind person who liked to learn. You also said you had fun playing shogi, which nearly made Akashi’s heart skip a beat.

Oh. 

Oh.

He gets it now. The reason his brain was acting all slow was you. With that thought, everything became clearer. 

Now he wishes that love letter really was a prank.

“Ah Akashi-san, I think I have to go home soon,” you said, holding up your phone. “You’re heading out too right? Wanna walk with me?”

He blinked in surprise but quickly agreed.

“Great, just let me get my things first-” And with that you rushed back into the club room.

Akashi stood staring at the empty hallway, still caught up in his thoughts and trying to process what just happened between you two just a few seconds ago.

When you came back out with your things, he couldn’t help but smile softly. The two of you fell into conversation easily, and by the time you walked out of the school gates, you were still in a talk that showed no signs of nearing an end.

He wanted to continue walking and talking like this, but there was a car and a driver waiting for him in the exact opposite direction of where you were headed.

“Well, goodbye then L/n-san,” he said, hoping the reluctance wasn’t obvious.

You smiled in response. “Goodbye Akashi-san. It was nice talking to you.”

With that the two of you went your separate ways. Throughout the car ride home, Akashi could think of nothing but you. It would seem… he has taken quite the liking to you.

He isn’t sure what’ll happen next, but he’s looking forward to seeing you again and hopefully, talking more with you too.

. . .

note .. THIS CAME OUT LONGER THAN ORIGINALLY INTENDED but anyway i actually enjoyed writing this,,, yk all the stuff potentially going thru akashi’s mind when he has a crush intrigues me and uhh i hope u guys liked this and if u do PLS LMK WHAT U THINK !! it would legit mean the world if u guys did <3

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 304: The Council of OFA

Previously on BnHA: Hawks and Best Jeanist were all, “what up Todofam, we are here to apply for the positions of ‘son #4’ and ‘weird uncle’, respectively,” and then proceeded to insert themselves into the family drama without waiting for an answer. Hawks briefed Endeavor on the nation’s current status of “totally fucked”, promised to help him sort that out, and then asked him about OFA. Endeavor was all, “oh do you mean One For All, the mysterious thing that my intern Deku was apparently being targeted for?” and then we cut away, presumably before Endeavor could clarify that it never occurred to him to follow up on that, and Hawks was all “no of course not, why would it occur to anyone other than me to follow up on any of this super weird and ominously important shit.” Anyway so meanwhile Bakugou was all “LET ME SCREAM AT DEKU UNTIL HE WAKES UP” and the other kids were all “NO”, and then the chapter ended with All Might being all “I wonder what the vestige!me is currently chatting with Deku about.”

Today on BnHA: Deku drops in on the Vestiges, who are all “sup Deku, how do you like our fancy chairs.” OFA II and III are all “if you need us we’ll just be standing here silently in the corner pretending to be invisible and sparking endless discourse with our mere existence.” OFA IV is all “and now I will explain to you in a very convoluted way that you being quirkless was actually a good thing, since it means that you are probably not going to suddenly drop dead at the age of twenty. But also you’re probably going to be the last user of OFA for that very same reason.” Deku is all “that is wild. I’m just gonna stand here and stare at my hand.” Nana is all “so now that that’s settled could you please do me a small favor and kill my grandson for me”, because having just one topic to discourse about this week WASN’T ENOUGH, apparently. Thanks so much Horikoshi.

(ETA: okay so just a note before I start, this week’s RHA translation was a huge mess, so I followed up this chapter by reading a couple of other translations. the main one I’m using for reference is the one by @hanashimas​, whose weekly posts I highly recommend. anyway so you’ll see a couple of ETAs in this post in places where the initial translation was off.)

how many layers of bandages did they wrap this poor kid’s fucking hand in omg

jesus Deku. are you holding onto a bouquet of flowers under that thing?? or a tennis racket??

omg yes, finally

is he reading these names off a teleprompter lol. and if so, what has Jeanist ever done to slight you, Deku? “god bless Kacchan and Aizawa-sensei and Todoroki-kun and everyone else in the whole wide world... except for Best Jeanist. fuck that guy.” actually this joke would be funnier if half of tumblr didn’t legit feel that way lol but anyway

OH MY GOD

I NEED TO HAVE A TALK TOO. ABOUT, OH, EVERYTHING

I got immediate KHR vibes from ALL OF THIS. this is seriously such a Vongola aesthetic. “let’s use the luxuriously cushioned chairs with the seat backs that are ten feet high, and arrange all of the handsome ghost people in a big circle” like come on

that said there are also some slight LoTR vibes as well. “bring forth the ring, Deku”

I like how Six is sitting there with his feet drawn up all casual, but with his arms inexplicably sticking STRAIGHT OUT IN FRONT OF HIM and dangling over his knees like he’s doing some sort of zombie walk

apparently the Fourth wasn’t a big fan of shoes huh

interesting that All Might is the only one who’s still faint/indistinct, and and that Two and Three are fully visible

(ETA: the rest of my speculation about Two and Three has been moved into a separate post, the better to focus on the shit that’s actually happening in this chapter lol.)

and lastly, interesting that all of them are talking now, except for All Might (and I guess the Second and Third as well). to the best of my knowledge Deku hasn’t unlocked the Sixth’s quirk yet, so I guess the quirks don’t really have anything to do with it

oh and it looks like Deku’s mouth is still covered. I guess that’s convenient for the vestiges since we all know it’s hard to stop Deku once he gets going. but on the other hand it’s very inconvenient for people like me who wanted to see some interaction. alas

so First says that OFA’s power has grown a lot in the last four months (i.e. since Deku unlocked Blackwhip), and now the vestiges can communicate with each other as well as Deku

so even when Deku’s not around they can all just chill with each other. this is such a weird thing to me lol. like it’s cool, don’t get me wrong, but it’s also strange as hell to know that you’ve got eight other people hanging out in your head spying on everything you do and having conversations with each other about it. it would be like if Dark Shadow had someone to hang out with other than Tokoyami. good thing you weren’t triplets, Tokoyami

First says that it’s become easier for the vestiges to interact with Deku ever since TomurAFO barged into the OFA Domain back at Jakku. huh

(ETA: apparently this is because AFO forcibly pulled out OFA’s power when he was trying to steal the quirk, so I guess that makes sense.)

okay thank you Banjou for addressing this concern which I initially brought up as a joke, but which was apparently real enough for you to reassure Deku about

“don’t worry, even though we’re awake and hanging out inside of you at all times, we’re definitely not secretly watching and making fun of every single thing you do” hmmmmm

(ETA: “not that you could do anything about it even if we were, since you’re probably going to be the last OFA holder ever!” I don’t trust anything this asshole says lmao.)

OH SHIT??

YESSS DEKU now you can hold them accountable for all of their bullshit! because I do not doubt that there will be bullshit lol but let’s see how that goes

oh damn

well okay then. you didn’t have to stand up and walk over to him and loom all threateningly like that but okay sir

this guy has kind of a Kimimaro vibe to him. remember? that bone-growing guy from Naruto? except I’m pretty sure he had eyebrows. and wasn’t twenty feet tall. speaking of which, that explains the chairs

why are you wearing only 3/5ths of a shirt

lol what

someone’s gonna have to explain this to me. is he just redundant or something lol, or is he strangely poetical or what

(ETA: apparently HE’S MAKING A PUN omg. I immediately gained +10 love for him lol. also it flows a lot better in Japanese. this is one of the things Caleb is usually good at, so we’ll see what he does with the wordplay.)

omg the hermit theory is true!!

“I’M NOT WEIRD, IT’S SOCIETY WHICH IS WEIRD.” lol whatever you say buddy. also love how Banjou tried to give him a big hearty slap on the back but Hermit Boy was not having it lmao

IS HE TRYING TO CAPTURE HIM WITH BLACKWHIP

AND ACTUALLY, NO, SIR, AS A MATTER OF FACT, WE ARE NOT AWARE. SO SPILL!!

?!!?

okay my first response was LOL ARE YOU SERIOUS, THAT’S THE BIG SECRET!? -- and then it hit me what the significance of “died from old age... AT AGE FORTY” meant. at which point it was like “!!!!!” and then “OH, SHIT”

(ETA: there’s also an Iida joke here somewhere but I’m just too tired to make it.)

oh my god oh my god

did he somehow get a copy of the coroner’s report or something? like how does he even know that he died from “old age” as opposed to any number of other natural causes? ??

but anyway. so this is the quirk singularity coming into play then I guess. but then how come All Might is still alive and ticking?

(ETA: so this is one example of where this week’s translation is a mess lol. apparently the Fourth explains here that he didn’t know what the fuck he died from until All Might researched it. and it turns out there actually was an autopsy lol so there you go.)

so Fourth says he held OFA for eighteen years, and since he knew he would never be strong enough to defeat AFO on his own he basically just spent all his time punching rocks in the woods and training to power the quirk up

oh shit

is he implying that his body literally fell apart?? like that’s how he got the scars on his face? -- IS THAT WHAT KEEPS HAPPENING TO TOMURA, THEN. oh shit

DUDE

so you’re telling me that this quirk actively shortens the lifespan of anyone who uses it?? and my little boy here has had it now for a year already?? fuck me, I have immediately have a TON of thoughts about all this but let me save it until he’s done with his explanation

THANK YOU, DEKU

right?? how come All Might didn’t die then. even after he got injured. please don’t tell me he actually is dying still and is just being slow about it because I SWEAR TO GOD

what does this mean??

so what you’re trying to say is you all have NO FUCKING IDEA how long Deku’s gonna be able to hold this quirk before he SUDDENLY DROPS DEAD?! five generations ago this dude was able to hold it for eighteen years, and then four generations later All Might was able to hold it for thirty-odd years or so, and now Deku has it and you all have no clue which way it’s gonna go? actually this makes it sound like it really wasn’t OFA that killed the Fourth at all and you guys are just really bad at forming hypotheses. but since you’re making a big plot point out of it I guess it must be true

and don’t think I didn’t notice the part where you said you didn’t have OFA very long and then “died while fighting”, Firsto. I want to hear more about that. specifically who you passed the quirk onto before your death

and yes, if we are agreeing that OFA was the cause of the Fourth’s death, then the conclusion on this next page is the natural one to draw

so that’s a bit of a relief then, because Deku is quirkless too. so it means he won’t be able to hold OFA forever (and will probably have to find another quirkless person to pass it on to), but at least he won’t be randomly dying out of the blue next Tuesday or something

oh my god now he’s talking about OFA and AFO and user consciousnesses and all sorts of good theory stuff but it’s so much exposition. you’re really gonna make me read all this lol

wait what. why would All Might being quirkless have anything to do with the presence of his vestige in OFA Outer Space Party Land

but Deku is also quirkless and he’s clearly visible and chatting with you guys. so what gives. like how much of this is verified fact and how much of it is you guys just shrugging and making stuff up lol

SERIOUSLY, GUYS

BUT DEKU IS ALSO -- you know what, never mind sob. none of this shit makes any sense but whatever

(ETA: seriously, this all seems like an awful lot of speculation on their part. for Deku’s sake I sure hope they’re right.)

FSSKDJFLSKLKJLKJL ALL MIGHT IS FIFTY-FIVE?!

lol that’s a full ten years past my closest estimate, wow. but this pretty much confirms his age now at last! or at least confirms it within a couple of years, because we know All Might and Nana met when he was in middle school, and he presumably had the quirk by the time he took the U.A. entrance exam. so yeah. gonna go with fifty-five

so they think that because All Might was quirkless, OFA was better able to adapt to his body and became his true quirk, as opposed to being an extra quirk that stacked on top of the one he already had and overwhelmed him. ties in back to the whole “AFO used to bend people to his will by forcing quirks on them” thing, as well as the “Noumus are all mindless because of the strain of having multiple quirks”

Two and Three are really ruining the serious vibe of this scene here lol

they look like they’re doing the counting for hide and seek

and is this Deku talking now? I was about to get mad at First for implying that quirkless people are somehow freaks, as opposed to “normal” people jdslk

so in other words, don’t go giving it to your best friend all casually for shits and giggles, Deku. even if it would make a really cool climax for a movie. well shit. maybe that’s why they were so quick to nope back into Deku’s body afterward

so First says that because quirkless people are becoming rarer and rarer, the fact that All Might just happened to stumble upon Deku is “nothing short of a miracle.” which, yeah, that was definitely a stroke of luck there. being quirkless saved his life. but being quirkless is also part of why he was chosen in the first place, and we’ve always known that much

“in other words, kiddo...”

looks like there was some hurried clone stamp usage going on here lol. but props to RHA as always for putting this scan out so fast, especially given how exposition-heavy this week’s chapter has been

“anyways, that was the main topic” ARE YOU SERIOUS. there are like ten other topics imma need you all to get to here, people

(ETA: seems like this is a mistranslation; the line should actually read something more along the lines of “and now for the main topic.”)

FFFFFFFFF

“ENJOY YOUR CLIFFHANGER THIS WEEK.” dskfalkjlkjwlgkjl you really went and dumped this discourse on us yet again. fucking...

(ETA: forgot to mention, but as several people mentioned, this seems to be another mistranslation -- rather than asking Deku to kill Tomura as though it’s doing her a personal favor, Nana is asking “will you be able to do it.” in other words more of an “are you capable of doing it” type of thing. which is a very reasonable question to ask given that Deku is, well, Deku.)

anyways, and the answer is obviously going to be “no” of course. this isn’t going to end any differently than when the previous Avatars all told Aang to kill Ozai. but I guess it means we’re in for a fun conversation next week

so Nana looks pretty grim here though (nothing at all like the person who once taught All Might the importance of saving people with a smile), and I’m wondering if this means she believes that her grandson is already beyond saving. as in killing him would be a mercy, as opposed to him continuing to live with AFO bending his mind and body to his will. except if that is the case, I think she’s underestimating Tomura’s own will. and definitely underestimating Deku’s will to save

and also, just... I’m so fucking sick of AFO screwing the Shimura family over, honestly. this is exactly what he wanted. well fuck you, guy. you don’t get to have what you want. go out there and save Tomura, Deku. for his sake and for Nana’s. give them some hope. do your thing, boy. can’t wait for your big speech all about it next chapter lol

[mrwinterr]

Kissletoe

Pairing: College!Bucky Barnes AU x Female Reader

Summary: You’re not a fan of mistletoes. You think it’s an outdated Holiday tradition and an excuse for lovesick fools to steal a kiss. Unlucky for you, college parties are riddled with them this year and someone’s been trying to meet you under one all night.

Warnings: College shenanigans (no one cares in the real world). Smut 18+ (unprotected sex, vaginal penetration & fingering, oral [female receiving], handjob & attempted dirty talk/goofy sex?). Language. Mentions of drugs and alcohol. & bad Christmas pickup lines.

Title Inspiration: “Kissletoe” by 3OH!3

A/N: I’ve never been kissed under the mistletoe let alone attended a legit college party because I’ve been lame my whole life. 🔔 ‘Tis that season! 🎄 Happy Holidays, ya filthy, lovely readers! 🙋🏻‍♀️ Raise your hand if you’re on the naughty list this year! ❤️ Enjoy!

It’s the end of the college fall semester and for the majority of students, the only way to celebrate surviving finals week is to let loose and party, especially right before you’re all forced to go back home to visit family for the Holidays.

“Where do you think you’re going dressed like that?” You hear your friend and roommate Natasha ask.

You stop stuffing your belongings in a box and pause at her question to look down at your current attire - black leggings paired off with an oversized University college-style sweatshirt. You had your hair pulled up in a messy bun, your face clear of any make-up, and lastly your feet were clad in funky, fuzzy socks. This is what you normally wore inside the dorm around her, and you certainly didn’t need to dress to impress just to go home. What was she on about?

“Uh, home? Where else would I be going at the end of the semester?” You reply, an obvious answer.

“Don’t be a smartass,” she retorts, and is quick to follow up when she sees the knowing look on your face and mouth open to retaliate with an even sassy response, “and don’t even start!”

She knew you’d say something like you were exactly that, smart. You in fact had amazing grades and excelled in every course you’d enrolled in. You were confident that you’d aced your exams, so you’re not checking the portal every chance you could get to see if the professor had uploaded your grades yet.

“You’re not supposed to be leaving until Monday,” she reminded you.

“I know, but I mean, there’s no rule saying I had to stay here until then,” you clarify, continuing to pack up more of your things, “I’d rather much get a head start.”

“You’re that eager to get away from me, huh?” She says, feigning sadness.

“You’re the only thing I’m going to miss about college,” you assure her.

College was a different experience for everyone. It was an introduction to the real world. Some used it to start anew, to buckle down and make something of themselves, others used it as an extension to repeat four more years of high school.

You took your studies very seriously, especially if you wanted to maintain your scholarship. It was a known fact college wasn’t cheap and you were fortunate to be here on one. With all that aside, you still knew when to have some fun. After all, all work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy, right? You didn’t want to be that kind of person, you wanted to enjoy your college years, and luckily you had almost a polar opposite friend in Natasha to level you out.

“We just survived another week of finals,” she states, and grabbing your arms to stop you for just one second, “what better way to celebrate than partying?”  

She sees the conflicted look in your eyes, and can tell you’re weighing out the pros and cons. There were a lot of cons: you’d be surrounded by tons of people, most of which were going to be drunk as fuck or high out of their minds on whatever substance was passed around and the threat of getting taken advantage of by some stranger. The pros? You had some steam to let off and this was a chance to gather and see some of your other friends before the Holiday break. ‘Tis the season, right?

“I guess you’re right,” you start, beginning to compromise, “why not? It’ll be like a little send off,” you decide, throwing in a shrug, and that was it.

“We’re college kids, it’s our right,” Natasha shrugs, before digging into one of your boxes and pulling out one of your cute dresses. You could always count on her to help look good too.  

When you both take the short walk to the house, where tonight’s party would be taking place, you abruptly halt at the end of the front porch steps, breaking your locked arms with Natasha.

“Jesus, what’s wrong?” She curses lightly as she almost trips backwards.

“This house…” you start, taking a step back and look up to inspect it, squinting, as if that would do you any good in the dark.

“Yeah?” She asks, a little too impatient, obviously hiding something.

“It’s familiar,” you continue, still trying to find out why it was so. Usually, that wasn’t a good thing...

“Come on. What are you talking about? It’s just a house. Don’t think too much and have fun tonight!” She says, stomping back down the steps and grabbing your arm to drag you up towards the front door.

“I guess you’re right,” you say, giving up again. What were you so worried about?  

“Aren’t I always?” She comments, and is, again, quick to shut you down when she sees you open your mouth. She presses her finger to the doorbell just as your mouth closes, and you both await the host.

You look off to the side and stare at the Greek letters tacked onto the wall. You knew you weren’t going to let it go on trying to find out why this house looked so familiar. Then, just when you’ve figured it out, your eyes widen in realization, the grip around your arm intertwined with Natasha’s tightens, feeling your attempt to slip away. The door swings open and the voice that booms out of the person, verifies your answer.

“Well, well, well...the weather outside sure is frightful, but this,” Bucky Barnes starts out singing before looking only in your direction, “oh, seeing you, is so delightful,” ending in a somewhat serious note.

“God, I hate winter,” you comment off to the side. It earns you a jab from Natasha, silently asking you to play nice.

He greets Natasha and easily lets her slip past him into the house. You call out her name, appalled that she left you alone with Bucky. Wasn’t that some rule? Never leave your friends alone at a Frat party.

“You look beautiful,” Bucky says sincerely when it’s just the two of you, to which you don’t respond, but roll your eyes. You didn’t come here to get seduced or hit on, but nonetheless shiver, and logically you could blame it on the cold weather and not the way that comment from him made you feel, then attempt to get inside the warm house.

"Excuse me,” he says, holding out his arms on either side of the door frames, blocking your entrance both ways, “where is my Christmas kiss?“ he asks, leaning in close to you.

“What the hell are you talking about?” You ask incredulously and back away. You owed him no such thing, but when you see the sly smirk on his lips, and his head signal for you to look up, you discover a traditional mistletoe hanging right above your heads.

Bringing your head back to its regular position, you look him dead in the eyes, “I’m not going to kiss you under the mistletoe, Barnes,” you scoff at his attempt to smooch you.

“Why not?” He presses, shuffling his weight from one leg onto the other, and before you can even give him an answer, you both hear your name being shouted from behind him. Bucky whips his head back and you do your best to look over his shoulder.

It came from your friend Wanda, who was excitedly waving you over to her. You smile and wave back at her, internally grateful that luck was on your side at this moment. Bucky turns back around and stares at you, wondering how to pick back up on your conversation, but when he doesn’t come up with anything, he sighs defeatedly, drops his arms and finally lets you in.

You make your way over to Wanda engulfing her with a huge hug. Natasha was close by, sipping on her drink. You’ll grill her later for leaving you alone with Bucky. She knew not to do that, but she did it at every chance she got. Now, you knew why she brought you to this specific house party.

“You weren’t planning on leaving without a proper farewell, were you?” Wanda asked worriedly. You immediately pieced together that Natasha had ratted you out on your attempt to leave campus and head back home early.

“It’s not forever, Wan,” you assure her. It was literally only for a few weeks, but while everyone would probably only be a few hours away from each other or a few states apart different, Wanda would be flying back to her home country to spend the Holidays with her family. You’ll admit, you could’ve been a little more considerate and sensitive.

“I’ll still miss you,” she says, the admission melting your heart, not even thinking about how the separation would be on others.

“She’s right, it’s not forever,” Natasha interjects, not allowing for any sad vibes on your last few hours of the semester together, “let’s make some memories tonight,” she says before handing you a drink.

Bucky, as hard as he tried to cover it up, rejoins his group of friends, Steve and Sam, sulking. He’d gotten you alone again, but failed, and he vowed to never give up. He had a crush on you, simple as that, but you were playing hard to get, and all this time spent on playing cat and mouse when you could be doing other things.

“Man, just save yourself from any further embarrassment and give up,” Sam tells him while also handing him a drink of his own, which Bucky accepts and quickly takes a swig from.

“Never,” he said, determined and slightly winces at the burn in his throat, his body almost warming in an instant, “I’m gonna get my Holiday kiss.”

“Why do you even care? You’re usually not one behind this Holiday shit,” he asks, looking around the crowded room.

“I’m not, but it gives me a reason to get close to her,” Bucky admits pathetically, staring into the red solo cup before taking the last swig, crushing it in his hand and air balling it to the trash.

“Dude!” Steve chastises him about adding onto the mess they’d have to clean afterwards, to which Bucky shrugs at.

“You can’t expect her to just kiss anyone under the mistletoe,” Steve reminds him. He knew it wasn't an easy conquest for any guy to gain your affection.

“I’ve been a good boy this year, alright, I’m gonna get her to see what she’s been looking for has been in front of her this whole time,” Bucky says trying not to sound or look as predatory as he watched you disappear into the kitchen with your friends.

You suppose the saying rules were meant to be broken, were taken a bit too literal by your friends, even college party rules because you’re left alone again. Wanda had abandoned the trio for some alone time with her boyfriend, who everyone dubbed Vision or Vis for short due to how outrageously innovative he was. Natasha decided to partake in a classic game of beer pong, something you incredibly sucked at, so there was no way she was going to recruit you as her partner nor were you interested in standing there awkwardly watching the game go on.

Surprisingly, the only place that seemed to be of a quiet enough spot to think was the backyard patio. You could see there was a fire lit and some other students scattered or sprawled on the grass. Quickening your pace, you manage to claim a vacant lawn chair next to the fire and hope you’d stay warm and at peace.

There you start to think that being in attendance tonight would’ve made no difference. Natasha was just good at persuading you into things. Call it peer pressure or whatever, but you put your faith and trust in her to not believe she’d ever steer you in the wrong direction, so why were you so bothered being here?

“You know, refusing to kiss someone under the mistletoe is bad luck,” you hear the voice of the reason why.

“I don’t believe in that bullshit,” you respond, watching as he plops down on the empty seat next to you.

“Really? Then why haven’t you been out on a date in so long?” he asks tauntingly.

“How would you know?” You ask a bit offended.

Why was he so concerned about your love life? You were never close with Bucky growing up and if anyone was of an impression you were, it was only because of Steve, who welcomed everyone, and that included you when you moved into the neighborhood when you were a little girl.

All throughout elementary school, until things started developing, puberty probably, it further separated you from Bucky. Steve blossomed a little later in life, so it helped solidify a good friendship with him, the same couldn’t be said for Bucky. You didn’t hate him, just got annoyed by his harmless teasing.

“I’ll have you know I have other priorities,” your attempt at an excuse was subtle, but you didn’t owe him an explanation anyways.

“Sure,” he says in a tone that suggests he didn’t believe you.

You watch as he lights up a cigarette, takes a small drag, and the cloud of smoke puffing out from his lips. He notices your stare and digs into his coat pocket, fishing out the pack before offering you one. You accept and pluck one out of the carton, he follows up with sticking out his lighter and you lean in closer to him to place the end of your stick against the flame.

You weren’t going to deny the relieving effect the nicotine had running through your body. College was stressful and while you weren’t one to abuse substances, a hit every now and then helped calm your nerves.

“So why is it you won’t kiss anyone under the mistletoe?” He asks, leaning back on the plastic chair, his head turning to the side, full attention on you.

He was enchanted by the girl, who grew up into a beautiful young woman, sitting next to him, slowly killing herself with every inhale and exhale of the cigarette between her lips, but you weren’t just attractive to Bucky, you were every bit incredible to him. You were smart, helpful, loyal to your friends and he was just misguided sometimes in life that led you to astray from him.

“It’s just an excuse for guys to steal a kiss from some poor girl...for lonely people to fake love,” you said almost bitterly.

Truth was, you had a bitter experience with a guy who’d led you on in high school after accidentally hearing that he could bet his friends he could get you to make out with him and he’d do so by using a mistletoe as a ruse.

Bucky detected some distaste in your response but decides not to interrogate you on it any further. There’d been a lot of growing up between the two of you since you’d both been estranged during your teenage years, and certain life events were missed on either party. So, where did you both stand in each other's lives now? You weren’t sure if you could call each other friends. It wasn’t easy to avoid Bucky, what with all the mutual friends and classes you shared, including the same street back home.

“I didn’t throw this party just to see everyone before they leave or to celebrate the end of finals,” he reveals, after several, somber minutes of silence, the cigarettes in your hands quickly burning out.

“Then why did you?” You ask curiously, meeting his gaze.

“To see you,” he simply admits. It was vague.

“How’d you even know I’d show up?” You quiz him.

“Because I begged Natasha to convince you,” he freely says, exposing his plan.

You were a smart person, but you couldn’t figure Bucky out. Why would he do that? Or for that matter, say something like that. What was his endgame here?

“Tis the fuckin’ season,” you comment offhand, getting up from the seat to leave. You stomp out your cigarette and prepare to head back inside and bid your farewells.

You’re just about to step through the threshold, when you feel a large hand wrap around your arm, halting you in place in the middle of the sliding screen door.

“Am I really that bad?” He inquires, and you know he’s not asking about just kissing him under the mistletoe anymore. Bucky always wore his heart on his sleeve, no matter how tough he appeared to be. It fooled a lot of people, sometimes you included, but in this moment, he seemed to genuinely be concerned about your perspective about him.

You were too grown to blame how the course of your relationship with Bucky had gone south on silly teenage phases. You knew it was much deeper than that, it was how sad it made you feel.

You’d harbored a small crush on him back then and it was cruel to see him grow into a handsome, charming guy and go out with other girls. He never showed an interest in you in the past and it was getting exhausting trying to get his attention, it was proving to be a distraction in your life, so it was then you’d vowed to focus on yourself and the life ahead of you, a life that didn’t revolve or involve Bucky.

However, a part of you, the risky and impulsive part of you, said you had less than a handful of months left before you were set to walk the stage and graduate. If you did what you were about to do, you could avoid Bucky for just one more semester, then you’d move far, far away and most likely never see him again. With a quick glance up, you give in to the idea of this side of you, lean in and plant your lips on Bucky’s soft ones.

Bucky is left dumbfounded, eyes still half closed when you pull away. He was shocked, caught off guard, and you by a totally different notion. You like him, you’ve always liked him.

It was a decent kiss if anyone would’ve caught it, at least you hoped it appeared it was, and that Bucky could convince you of it being so…

“You said kissing under the mistletoe is for lonely people to fake love...so then why do I feel so alive?” he asks you in a daze.

He doesn't succeed in convincing you.

How you’d both managed to move past that scene at the doorway without raising suspicion was beyond you two. The fact you both found a vacant room was an even more impressive feat at the moment.

“You better have locked that door,” you say, attempting to make it sound like a threat, but with you underneath him, you were anything but.

Shoes scattered along the pathway to the bed, his thick jacket following in suit. You’d managed to pull your lips back from his, but he couldn’t keep his off of yours as they trailed from the corner of your lips, along your jawline and down your neck. You feel his tongue drag just along your pulse, causing your hips to thrust up. You let out a moan at what you felt through his jeans and how he started sucking and nibbling over the spot he’d licked.

“Why? Don’t want everyone finding out how naughty you actually are?” He questions back teasingly with a cocky grin, and as he tugs at the sleeves of his unbuttoned shirt.

You don’t have a comeback for him, but instead you lightly shove him back and try to escape from underneath, hoping to get through to him and show you’re in fact serious. The last thing you wanted was for any of your friends to walk in on you two in the act.

“Relax!” He says, also sitting up and reaching out and pulling you back to him, “I locked it,” he assures, leaning in closer, “not even Santa will know what we’re doing,” then his lips reclaim yours, his tongue delving in your mouth. You’re once more on your back, lips locked and heavy. Had you known kissing Bucky was this good, you’d have kissed him earlier.

Bucky’s hands run up your thighs, snake their way underneath, you feel his fingers ghost over your scantily clad pussy. The tingling sensation causes the feeling in the pit of your stomach to brew.

“You want me to touch you?” He asks huskily while still pecking your lips.

“Yes,” you almost immediately answer, desperate for his touch.

“How bad?” Oh, he knows how bad, but he had so much fun watching you crumble.

“Bucky,” you start to whine.

“Tell me...how bad do you want me to touch you,” he repeats slowly.

“Fuck you,” you bite back. He was really going to make you say it, “I want you to touch me so bad...please, Bucky,” you quickly give in.

Bucky rewards you with a deep kiss as you feel him hook a finger on the thin slit of your panties and pull them to the side. He runs a long finger between your folds, and he pulls his lips away to inhale sharply.

“You’re so wet,” he states the obvious, bringing that same hand up to his lips to lick the pad of his thumb so he could start rubbing circles on your clit. You bite your lip and stare at him, he’s watching you carefully, loving how hard you’re trying to hold back.

“You want to be a good girl?” He asks, and you nod, “then don’t hold back. Stop fighting me, and I’ll make you come hard with just my fingers,” he bargains. You want to call him on his bluff, but he’s the one with the upper hand - literally. “But first…,” he starts, sitting up on his knees, hands back at his sides so he could scoot down lower on the bed, “...I want to taste this pussy,” his voice deep, and almost dangerous.

He pushes the end of your dress up, bunching it at the waist, to reveal your cute underwear. He pauses for a split second, “Holiyay indeed” he says to himself, reading the embezzled design on the front of your thong. You don’t even roll your eyes in annoyance anymore, because maybe if you kept quiet and submissive enough, you’ll finally get to come.

When he rids you of the garment, Bucky uses his fingers to spread your wet lips before running his tongue flat against it, only narrowing out when it reaches your clit. He spends a little more time at your there, circling it with his tongue, lightly kissing and sucking at it. His fingers start rubbing you, tracing the rim of the opening, while his mouth was still busy at work.

You're all but writhing from the buildup, your chest heaving up and down, stomach clenching tight from his doing, not prepared for when he inserts a finger inside your wet hole. You audibly gasped and reached a hand towards him, but he swats it away. You dare pick your head up to watch, and you’re met with his eyes, full of lust, looking up at you, but his mouth still latched onto your pussy. You can feel his finger slide in and out of you slowly, your mouth open displaying how good he’s making you feel.

In fact, it’s too good you’re not in control of your legs anymore as they kick and squirm at the feeling he’s bestowing on you, so he removes his finger away from you only to maneuver into a position where he could hook his arms under legs and basically slam your back down on the bed. You unconsciously start chanting his name, like a silent prayer for him to touch you down there again.

Your head is a little fuzzy, body on fire; you want to burst. Unable to pick up your head, you cast your eyes down on him just in time to see him spit on your already soaking cunt. You watch as he uses his fingers to spread the wetness all over before slipping two fingers inside of you.

The intrusion causes you to groan and back to arch, and you can’t help but grab at any part of the arm that his hand going to work on you, just making sure it doesn't go away until it gets the job done. He chuckles lightly at your eagerness with your hips bucking up at his palm.

“I promised I’d let you come, right?” He points out, which you nod fervently, loosen your grip and attempt to keep your hips at bay, so he could fulfill his promise. You feel his finger push in about knuckle-deep and curl inside, causing you to choke out a dry sob. You begin to bite your lip, hard, when he does it again and again.  

Your hands are on autopilot, trying to heighten the pleasure your body was being coursed with, and they grab handfuls of your breasts, still confined in your dress. You squeeze and squish them together, anything to help you find that release sooner. Bucky’s gaze catches onto your moves and licks at his lips, the sight of your breasts threatening to spill out offers him a taste of what’s still yet to be unwrapped.

He speeds up his efforts, they��re proven efficient as you start clenching tight around his fingers, your arousal also coating the palm of his hand. He whispers tiny praises as you try to recover from the first orgasm. You swallow the lump in your throat and run your hands over your face, almost dazed and bewildered that Bucky was capable of pulling something like that out of you.  

Your legs fall limp on the bed, the silence broken by Bucky, “such a sweet pussy,” he compliments, and you take a peek between your fingers to see his fingers pop out of his mouth from sucking his digits clean.

“Do you want to unwrap your gift?” He asks, crawling over to you. You manage to sit up, your body supported by your propped elbows, so Bucky is slightly hovering over you. You nod at his question and he brings one hand behind your head to swoop you in for a sweet kiss. You use both hands to hold his face in place to make the kiss last just a little longer.

Bucky reluctantly pulls away though so he could grab at the bunched fabric of your dress and pull it over your head, leaving you completely bare in front of him. He swears, eyes running over every part of you before sitting upright on his knees again.

You lean in and reach with both hands to unbuckle his belt, the clinking of metal sounding loud, button popping off in haste, and dragging the zipper down. You yank down at his fitted jeans to reveal the imprint of his hard cock under his boxer briefs. Fuck, he was big, that much you could see. You couldn’t keep your grabby hands away as you palm him through the fabric, his cock twitching at the indirect contact.

“Take it out,” he instructs, and you look up perilously at him, eyes begging him to confirm, “...it’s yours, baby girl,” and it was all the assurance you needed to peel his boxers down.

You wrap your hands around his length and start pumping him languidly. He was already hard and no doubt fully erect, but you immediately found how good it felt in your hands. With every pump, his pre-cum pools at the head, and with each trip your hands make up to the tip, they travel back down with the substance, effectively lathering him up and making him slick enough for an easy entry.

“I want to fuck you so bad,” he admits when you give his member an experimental squeeze, your fingers curl around him, the tips grazing along his balls.

Leaning in to place light kisses to his pecs, you look up at him, “well, you’ve been a good boy, so do it,” you say, hands retreating as you lie back down, “...fuck me, Bucky.”

Bucky lets out a low growl, kicks his bottoms away, and climbs back on top of you. He reaches down to grab his cock and starts running it up and down the length of your sex, causing your body to shudder. You could feel the ridges and just how hard he got before he slowly slid his cock inside. There’s a tiny sting on his entrance as his thick cock stretches your walls.

“Mmm, baby, it’s cold outside,” he starts playfully singing, “...but you, you’re so warm,” kissing your cheek, getting you to relax; not realizing you had held your breath trying to bear through the initial pain, “...and so wet,” he says pulling out with a lewd noise, before thrusting all the way back in, bottoming out.  

He starts off sweet and slow, and while you liked that on some occasion, now wasn’t one of them. Bucky’s cock probed at your spot almost instantly and you found out you didn’t want to prolong the euphoric ending. His hands slip around your smaller frame, pulling your body up, closer to his, while his hips moved in waves crashing harder and harder into yours.

His face buried into the mattress next to your face, you hear his breathy moans, and you love that he doesn’t hold them back the slightest. Who didn’t like to hear how good the other person was making them feel, right? You grip and pull at his hair, while the other gabs at his buttocks, feeling it flex with each snap of his hips, and your legs tangled with his. Sweat that had built up on your bodies make the movements sloppy, muscles beginning to ache, both of you were about to peak.

“God, you feel so good,” he says, picking his head up, his hair matted and messy, he still looked sexy, “...you gonna come all over my cock now?” His words fuel you and your hips start driving into his, making him eat his own words, “fuck, baby, you’re gonna make me cum!”

“Yes, Bucky,” you coo, your hands gripping his sides, loving the feeling of his hard body, slick and warm to the touch, “...come,” you try coaxing him, but one particular thrust rips right through you and your walls start clenching him tighter than the fit.

You only finish the command when you’re riding the waves of the aftershock, “come on, Bucky, I want it...inside, please.” You definitely picked up on the fact that he liked to hear you beg and be specific with your wants.

Bucky soon stills, spurts of his hot cum splatter your walls that continue to flutter around his cock. His climax spreads warmth all over your lower body. Your limbs, both arms and legs, wrap around his exhausted body. He carefully drops his bodyweight on you, mindful of not suffocating you in the process.

When he’s regained regular breathing, using one of his hands, he reaches behind him in search of yours before interlocking your fingers and just holding it, you hold onto each other. Bucky picks up his head and stares at your hand in his, you follow his gaze and join him. They fit with one another perfectly, and even so, the light squeeze he gives it, lets you know it also felt right.

“Well, where have you two been?” Sam says loudly, announcing you and Bucky’s arrival, rejoining your group of friends. Wanda and Vision close to each other, his arm around her frame, Natasha standing in between Sam and Steve, a refilled cup in each of their hands.

“I have been trying to escape this crazed man all night,” you playfully exaggerate.

“And yet you’ve managed to keep failing,” Bucky chimes in smugly, a cute smirk running across his features. This unearthed feeling testing your willpower to keep up with appearance and show resistance.

“Yeah, no thanks to my so-called friends,” pinning the blame on the two females in the room. Wanda turns red, guilty and slightly awful for abandoning you, but Natasha has a different reaction. She’s got that knowing smile on her face. It’s small, but very strong.

You watch as her eyes divert to the ceiling, you follow her gaze and then when you both look back at each other, the smile on her face turns into a full-blown smirk. There’s a collective sound of “oh’s” from everyone, noting the mistletoe above you and Bucky.

Turning to Bucky, who looks like he doesn’t know what to do, just stands there staring at you, not knowing what to expect. You’re supposed to act like nothing happened or reveal anything to your friends just yet, so he mentally prepares for a rebuttal to your impending rejection or insult to kiss him. Nothing could’ve prepared him for what you do instead.

You place a hand on the back of his neck and pull him down to you and smash your lips together. Bucky’s hands immediately grab a hold of your hips, he’d have to get used to the lightheaded feeling when he’s close to you.

The kiss is slow and probably not appropriate to be deemed as a simple traditional mistletoe kiss, but you both can’t help it and continue to allow your lips to slide against one another’s before there’s a rise of cheers, whistling and howls around you, shattering the bubble.

When you pull apart, you reluctantly walk away from Bucky and head to where Natasha stood, steal the cup from her hand and finish off the remainder of her drink, all while staring straight at her. She knew. Only when you’re done with the last sip, you give her the same small, sly smile. There are no words exchanged, and none needed.

“Guess, you have been a good boy this year, Barnes,” Sam jokes, but regardless is proud of his friend.

“Third time's the charm,” Bucky says casually, shrugging like it was no big deal, as if he hadn’t been desperately chasing you all night. You shake your head at his silliness, but nonetheless smile at him, your heart skipping a bit.

Who knew what you’d been looking for was hanging underneath the doorway staring at you face-to-face this whole time?

A/N: I can confidently say, I used one of these Christmas puns as a pickup line on a guy recently and it worked in my favor! Shoot your shot but stay safe in more than one way; these are them trying times. Also, the underwear thing is a real design I saw while looking through Victoria’s Secret sales…lol. 

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