#if this doesn't make sense I blame it on covid

[another-lost-mc]

I really love the idea that fallen angels have uniquely different experiences than other demons.

Sure, they might be demons now, but once upon a time, they used to be something different. Falling doesn't magically erase countless years spent living in a completely different world, eating different foods and wearing different clothes and waking up and falling asleep under a different sky.

Fallen angels have memories about places that used to matter to them a long time ago - my old room, which dining hall had the best view of the gardens, which kitchen was easiest to sneak into for a late-night snack. They talk about places - a flower field or a river or lake - where they shared common experiences and memories they can still think of fondly. Demons that overhear them realize the places they're referring to simply don't exist in the Devildom.

I wonder what they would think about this? It's strange when other angels are mentioned in connection with a memory: perhaps those angels aren't as reputable or powerful as the Seraphim, but they're still once-treasured enough to not yet be forgotten. They're old friends lost in time.

How often do fallen angels revert back to speaking or writing scripture out out habit? How awkward is it to ace a test about Celestial Realm history when they struggle to recall the Devildom-centric events for those same periods in time?

Fallen angels sometimes refer to back home like something from an old memory. Sometimes they refer to Devildom holidays or traditions as things demons do as if they're not demons themselves. They're demons, but they weren't always. They're similar, but not exactly the same, either.

It's almost habit to talk about themselves as if they're an angel and a demon, because they're a unique breed of creature that's lived as both.

[amphibious-thing]

This is maybe a dumb question, but looking at the portraits of Hervey, I have a hard time noticing anything about how he's dressing that seems out of the ordinary or especially more 'feminine' for the time period (barring that one where he just has his coat buttoned super low and his whole shirt out?). Am I missing some obvious detail (material they were made out of maybe?) or was the his effeminacy/the perception of him as effeminate just more based on behavior than 'presentation'?

Not a dumb question at all. It was combination of his sexuality, his diet, his androgyny as well as his clothes & makeup. While Hervey's femininity was almost certainly exaggerated in satire written by his enemies there was some basis to this satire.

Sexuality

In the 18th century there was an association between effeminacy and sodomy. I don't think we can discount the role the rumours surrounding Hervey's sexuality played in the public's perception of him. William Pulteney's 1731 pamphlet A Proper Reply to a Late Scurrilous Libel satirises Hervey as Mr. Fainlove. Pulteney describes Fainlove as a "delicate Hermophrodite", a "pretty, little, Master-Miss" and insinuates that he's a pathick who "enjoys every Moment and Fruits of his Guilt". The 1739 pamphlet The State of Rome, Under Nero and Domitian satirises Hervey as Sporus (an allusion to Pope's satire of Hervey) describing him as a "Male-female Thing," who is "Fit only for the Pathicks loathsome Trade".

Pope's choice to satirise Hervey as Sporus in An Epistle from Mr. Pope, to Dr. Arbuthnot (1735) was itself a comment on Hervey's sexuality. Sporus being the boy that Nero is said to have castrated and taken as a wife.

Diet

Hervey was epileptic and suffered from a chronic colic. He details his medical history in An Account of My Own Constitution and Illness. At the recommendation of his doctor's George Cheyne he adopted a milk and vegetable diet. Cheyne believed that such a diet was "absolutely necessary for the total Cure of the Epilepsy” and also prescribed milk and vegetable diets in cases of “extreme Nervous Cholicts”. (The English Malady, p167 & 254) Hervey ate no meet for three years before reintroducing white meet. This diet was seen as effeminate by his contemporaries. Lady Louisa Stuart cites his refusal to eat beef as an example of the “extreme to which Lord Hervey carried his effeminate nicety”. (Stuart wrote this anonymously in the introductory anecdotes included in the 1837 edition of The Letters and Works of Lady Mary Wortley Montagu.)

Hervey also drank "ass’s milk with powder of crab’s eyes and oyster-shells" for his heath. This is mocked in the poem The Lord H-r--y's First Speech in the House of Lords (1733-4) that calls him "a perfect curd of ass's milk." Alexander Pope included a similar line in An Epistle from Mr. Pope, to Dr. Arbuthnot (1735) describing him as a "mere white Curd of Ass's milk".

[Certain City Macaronies drinking Asses Milk, print, c.1772, via The British Museum.]

The association between effeminacy and asses milk features in the satirical dialogue The City Macaronies drinking Asses-milk, at the Lacteum, in St. George's-fields published in the November 1772 edition of the Oxford Magazine which was accompanied by the above illustration. The dialogue mocks macaroni for drinking asses-milk as a treatment for "nervous cases" and "hysterics" claiming that it's "delicate men" such as the macaroni "whose fine feelings are sensible of the slightest pressure, that are acquainted with hysterics". The son of the milk woman wonders aloud whether the macaroni are men or women. His mother tells him "they're neither, they are a kind of half and half breed."

Androgyny

With his slim figure and a bit of a baby-face Hervey was considered to be naturally androgynous. When Lady Deloraine said to him and Miss Fitzwilliams that "in her opinion a woman could never look too much like a woman, nor a man too much like a man" Hervey admitted that "considering the two people she said this to, it was certainly well said; and I can forgive her having bragged of it to every creature she has seen since" (Hervey to Stephen Fox, 18 September 1731)

Satirical descriptions of Hervey liken him to a cherub or a fairy describing him as pretty, little, soft, dainty, delicate.

In A Proper Reply to a Late Scurrilous Libel (1731) Pulteney satirises Hervey as "pretty Mr. Fainlove" who he describes as a "delicate Hermophrodite", a "pretty, little, Master-Miss", a "pretty, little Scribbler", and comments that he shouldn't "sully those pretty Fingers with Ink" that "a Fan would become them much better than a Pen."

The Lord H-r--y's First Speech in the House of Lords (1733-4) describes him as "the softest, prettiest thing". In An Epistle from Mr. Pope, to Dr. Arbuthnot (1735) Pope describes him as having a "cherub's face". Tell-tale Cupids (1735) satirises him as the "pretty baby fac'd Lord Dapper".*

In A Fairy Tale (1743) by Horace Walpole depicts Hervey as a literal fairy describing him as a "Dainty little Figure", "most delicately Fair and light" who "would have been vastly Pretty if it’s cherry-lips had ‘nclos’d any Teeth".

*quoted in Lord Hervey: Eighteenth-Century Courtier by Robert Halsband

Clothes & Makeup

Pope didn't describe Sporus as a "bug with gilded wings" and a "Fop at the toilet" because of Hervey's natural androgyny, clothing & makeup absolutely played a role in the public perception of him.

The Duchess of Marlborough described Hervey as a having "a painted face, and not a tooth in his head". Pope described him as "painted Child of Dirt that stinks and stings". And the The Court Garland refers to him as "Thou powder-puff, thou painted toy". (see The Opinions of Sarah Duchess-Dowager of Marlborough p42, An Epistle from Mr. Pope, to Dr. Arbuthnot & Lord Hervey: Eighteenth-Century Courtier by Robert Halsband p138)

The fashionable look of the period required pale clear skin, flushed red cheeks and dark eyebrows. While washes and creams were used to achieve clear pale skin, white cosmetic paint could also be used to lighten and smooth the skin. Rouge was used to give colour to the cheeks. Burnt cloves could be used to darken the eyebrows. While some of these cosmetics contained lead or mercury not all of them did.

[Lord John Hervey, oil on canvas, c.1741–1742, by Jean-Baptiste van Loo, via Art UK.]

It's hard to know how reliable the accounts of Hervey's makeup use are however his portraits do depict him with this fashionable look (in particular the rosy cheeks of the Jean-Baptiste van Loo portraits and the Enoch Seeman portrait). While modern depictions of 18th century fops will sometimes exaggerate makeup depicting men with pure white faces and almost perfectly round red circles on their cheeks, Hervey's portraits are more accurate to the look these cosmetics were trying to achieve.

The use of cosmetics are highlighted in satirical depictions of effeminate men throughout the 18th century century. As early as 1691 Mundus Foppensis: or, the Fop Display’d was mocking men for the "wanton use" of "Spanish Red, and white Ceruse". In 1773 The Old Beau in an Extasy depicts a "Fop at Sixty two" who uses "Chinese Paint for Artificial Bloom". In 1812 Regency A la Mode depicts the Prince Regent applying rouge to his cheeks while he gets laced into stays. The Court Garland's satire of Hervey is just another example of a satirical depiction of a fop in makeup:

Thou powder-puff, thou painted toy, Thou talking trifle, H----y; Thou doubtful he, she, je ne sçai quoy, By G-d, the K--g shall starve ye.

[Left: The Old Beau in an Extasy, print, c.1773, by John Dixon, via Lewis Walpole Library.

Right: 1812, or, Regency A la Mode, print, c.1812, by William Heath, via Lewis Walpole Library]

As for clothing I have to admit I'm better at late-18th century menswear. That being said material and colour seem to have played a role in what was considered effeminate.

A letter to the Read's Weekly Journal or British Gazetteer published on the 8th of May 1731 complains; "Rich and coloured Silks are in themselves effeminate, and unbecoming a Man; as are in short, all Things that discover Dress to have been his Study- 'Tis in vain for a Fop of Quality, to think his Title will protect him." In particular the article criticises poke sleeves and green waistcoats. While poke sleeves are absent from Hervey's portraits the Seeman portrait depicts him wearing a green waistcoat.

Green waistcoats are also mentioned in a story published in the Universal Spectator and Weekly Journal on the 18th of October 1729 describing and effeminate man's clothing as follows:

He had a flower’d pink-colour Silk Coat, with a Green-Sattin Waistcoat lac’d with Silver. Velvet Breeches, Clock’d Stockings the Colour of his Coat, Red-heel’d Pumps, a Blue Ribbon at the Collar of his Shirt, and his Sword-Hilt he embrac’d under the Elbow of his Left Arm,

This green waistcoat is laced with silver. In the Jean-Baptiste van Loo portraits you can see a embroidered silver waistcoat peeking out from beneath Hervey's coat.

[Left: Lord John Hervey, oil on canvas, c.1737, by John Fayram, via Art UK.

Right: Lord John Hervey, oil on canvas, by Enoch Seeman, via The Collected Verse of John, Lord Hervey]

While the quality of the photo leaves much to be desired I wonder if the coat from the Seeman portrait is supposed to be silver. The coat he wears in the The Hervey Conversation Piece could also be silver but it might simply be grey. Sarah Osborn thought that silver coats looked effeminate. She wrote to Robert Byng on the 2nd of June 1722:

I believe the gentlemen will wear petticoats very soon, for many of their coats were like our mantuas. Lord Essex had a silver tissue coat, and pink color lutestring waistcoat, and several had pink color and pale blue paduasoy coats, which looked prodigiously effeminate.

Hervey wears a "prodigiously effeminate" pale blue, possibly paduasoy, coat (possibly a long sleeved waistcoat?) in the Fayram portrait.

The low buttoned waistcoat is somewhat interesting and consistent throughout his portraits, buttoned particularly low in the Fayram portrait. The effeminate Captain Whiffle from The Adventures of Roderick Random (1748) is described wearing his waistcoat "unbuttoned at the upper part to display a brooch set with garnets" but Hervey is broochless and looking at other portraits from this period the low buttoning doesn't seem to be unusual.

[Left: Detail of The Hervey Conversation Piece, oil on canvas, c.1738-40, by William Hogarth, via Fairfax House.

Right: Lord John Hervey, oil on canvas, c.1741, by Jean-Baptiste van Loo, via Art UK.]

Fur-lined suits like that worn by Hervey in the Jean-Baptiste van Loo portraits were imported from France or Italy and could be very costly. Mary Delany describes Lord Baltimore wearing "light brown and silver, his coat lined quite throughout with ermine" at a ball where "finery was so common it was hardly distinguished". (Mary Delany to Ann Granville, 22 Jan, 1739/40)

Fur-lined suits were somewhat of novelty in England and would become a feature in Grand Tour portraits. Peter McNeil explains in Pretty Gentleman (p123):

The novelty and glamour of new fashion goods generated excited responses to Lyons silk waistcoats, Italian velvets and fur-lined suits. There was a well-established tradition of wealthy men acquiring clothing on the continent and then having themselves painted in them, either in Italy or back in England.

(see Benjamin Lethieullier 1752, Lord Archibald Hamilton 1755-56 & John Scott 1774 all by Pompeo Batoni an artist well know for his Grand Tour portraits)

Hervey's buckles in the Jean-Baptiste van Loo portraits look to be set with paste (glass) or gems (buckles could even be set with diamonds). While it's impossible to tell what Hervey's buckles are set with these buckles could get very expensive. Later in the century macaroni were mocked for their expensive taste in similar buckles. (see McNeil p90)

[Left: Shoe buckle, metal & paste, 18th century, British via The MET (83.1.103).

Right: Detail of Lord John Hervey, oil on canvas, c.1741, by Jean-Baptiste van Loo, via Art UK.]

While Hervey was certainly a fashionably dressed man he doesn't take it to the extent you might imagine of the archetypal fop. Satire exaggerates. Hervey's enemies chose their words deliberately to humiliate him. The amphibious thing of Pope's poetry was in reality a chronically ill queer man with a taste for fashion.

[felixknow]

you're amazinggg also can you pretty pretty please do no 3 for the invisible ask game?? with chan <3

3. "No one loves me." "I'm literally right here."

Hiiii omg you're so sweet. Thank you for your patience <3 If anything doesn't make sense in these texts I blame it on my having covid rn

Han version

masterlist | not accepting requests, but feel free to say hi in my inbox <3

[miiilowo]

Highlights / Notable info from the second Scott Cawthon Dawko interview for people who don't want to watch it

MISC/START OF INTERVIEW

- scott says the 1 thing he'd wanna go back and change/fix the past 10 years is FNAF world; said a lot of weird/bad decisions were made going into it, that he didn't like the graphics and it Could Have been a good game but he doesn't like it overall & he may consider making an improved sequel

- he was scared to hand FNAF over to steel wool but he thinks he got lucky w/ them

- refuses to play both FNAF VR games because they genuinely scare him too much; didn't want to beta test them (funny)

- he very much knows the fandom prefers pure horror and the supernatural but cant resist leaning into scifi stuff

- doesn't like the names burntrap and glitchtrap and they were supposed to be temporary

SECURITY BREACH

- half blames covid splitting up steel wools workforce for the games lack of quality and delays

- says his "vision of the game" was misaligned with steel wool, that he had a "very specific story in mind" for security breach and it didnt pan out like he wanted

- he takes fault for it, saying he conveyed it in a bad way; "I was trying to tell steel wool to do specific things throughout the game, put specific items in specific places, have specific characters do certain things, meanwhile not TELLING them what the story plot was. Because in my head, I was thinking 'Okay, when people find this, they'll connect this to this to this & it will all be revealed, and I thought I could do that without telling steel wool the story plot. That didn't work out very well because they got all of these pieces, and they thought it was their job to connect them in a way that made sense. And so really what you ended up having were the same pieces telling completely different stories...I don't blame them for that, I blame myself for that, because what I should have done was gone 'hey, heres the story, the pieces are here, here's how theyre supposed to connect'."

- burntrap originally even supposed to move; just supposed to see something you saw in between machinery or in corners, that you werent supposed to know his purpose even though he used to have a very specific one (that the fandom doesnt know)

- he knows it didnt turn out like anyone wanted & thats why they made the RUIN dlc, he hopes it redeemed security breach

- he said hes learned from that mistake with security breach and things should be better in the future

- he cannot share any thoughts on the mimic

- he likes vanny a lot, shes one of his favorites and he thinks that shes underutilized and should get more spotlight in the future

THE BOOKS

- process is 'he has an idea, he proposes it to the writers, they flesh it out'

- he likes bunny call the most, and that it's not entirely made up; he took his family to a summer camp. 2 older kids 2 babies. one of the things you could sign up for was a 'panda call' . a very 'deceiving title', he says. early in the morning, a bunch of the camp counselors dressed as killer clowns would come into your cabin and scare the kids to wake them up early and drag them off to do their daily activities (?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????) and he knew this was the case, & before it happened he started to sort of feel bad that he signed up his two youngest kids for it so he crept outside in the dark and 'started listening for screams' early in the morning. 'somewhere in the dark in these trees theres clowns and theyre coming for my cabin'

- acknowledges the fazgoo is weird and bad.

- the 'creature on the cover of blackbird is my sleep paralysis demon' (quite literally)

- says his least favorite story is the guy getting pregnant with springtrap's baby and that he Doesnt Know What He Was Thinking, that he swears he 'wasnt trying to pick on matpat'

- he says theres potential for the books to be adapted into shorts goosebumps style, but hes afraid it might be 'too much' and oversaturate the franchise

THE MOVIE

- he says a big issue was that there was material thats difficult to translate to the big screen; the nuance of the antagonists being that the animatronics are possessed by the spirits of innocent children, and he wanted to preserve the innocence of the victims while also having the horror and the kills, and thats a big part of why several screenplays got scrapped; he was more picky/cautious about that than anything else

- says the victims are sort of like 'confused, scared animals backed into a corner, who believe that adults are out to get them' & thats part of why they kill people + the manipulation from william afton

- he likes the movie overall but thinks specific things could be improved and they aim to do that with the second movie, but doesn't want to dwell on those shortcomings too much

- hes perfectly happy with critics hating it but the fanbase loving it & that was his goal for it

- when the movie began showing in theatres he said: 'i told myself i wasnt gonna go online i wasnt gonna read any reviews i had already told everybody at blumhouse and i told my legal team DONT talk to me DONT call me DONT email me DONT send me charts DONT send me facts or figures i dont want hear ANYTHING', saw 1 negative review on accident then started reading all of them immediately before the 2nd showing even happened

- 'for a couple of hours there i was distraught, i thought it was a complete disaster' (based off the initial negative critic reviews, before learning how much the fans loved it)

SECOND MOVIE

- Not giving away many details, but following the same formula; 1st movie based on 1st game, 2nd movie based on 2nd game, etc

- Thinks people will like it, that the setup for the 1st movie was the hardest part but now that they have that launch pad to go off of and hes really fond of what they have planned

- Emma Tammi is also directing the second one

INTO THE PIT GAME

- was originally just supposed to be a short novelty game, but they made something really good and he encouraged them to keep going & its turned into a full-fledged game

- he says its going to be a very 'unique experience' and that everyone will like it a lot

- says working with megacat (studio for the game) has been 'weird but good', that theyll vanish for several months and return with a bunch of info

SPINOFFS, GENERAL FRANCHISE STUFF, FUTURE PLANS

- Would want to work on a game based off of Fetch and that he thinks it'd be really cool

- Says he feels like he's sort of lost touch with the fanbase as things have gotten bigger

- Wants to have a better structure for managing a twitter page, official news feed, etc., wants more management than just Himself because it'd better service the fanbase

- He says theres another game planned with steel wool (not the mimic game) way down the line that hasnt been announced yet

- Making more choose-your-adventure fnaf book stuff

- He's 'very careful' with collaborations because he wants to preserve the fact its fnaf and he doesnt want it to be distorted or tainted, & even if he really really likes a game he won't do a collab if the vibes are mismatched, but he's a little more open to things like that now (but we have FNAF X DBD now! yay)

THE BOX.

- (paraphrased) His process for a lot of the lore in games is that he'll come up with half of a mystery and then come up with an answer as things progress, that he feels something is there and he makes the path for that thing to be revealed

- 'but sometimes when things progress the roads that have been put in place arent the same roads that were there before'

- he had something planned for the box. the progression of the story did not allow for the reveal of whats in the box

- he never pursued whats in the box. and he will never know whats in the box.

[luhafraser]

Anons in my inbox... Sorry... I'm not ignoring you, but what do you want me to say? Nothing new here...

New Blah Blahlands?!

Another blah blah blah book... Nothing new in this "I had Covid" speech or have you guys already forgotten the Xmas 2021 - QT LA playlist on Spotify?! ... He's just unfolding a script that he created in December 2021... There was his "wee" accident too... A series of misfortunes... True or not?! Believe what you want... 😜🤣 Fact is that at the beginning of January 2022 he no longer had anything (or he wouldn't have gone to the Chargers game with Marina and Alex), he was in LA and I don't need to mention where Caitríona was, right?!

(The best part was Cait giving her location in a interview, where she was supposedly at the end of 2021 - London -, and this article being published on January 1, 2022... Because it's very common for Cait to give her location! 😜🤣)

All the "clans" in this fandom are fed with these books... We already had "the gardener" Sam, the bluebell flower thing, and now even the believers in gay theory are well served with this pathetic description of Sam and his flirtations.

Oh... And the article in The Telegraph? He should be ashamed of that. But tell me... How many thousands of people, from outside this fandom, are going to read and/or pay attention to that?

Of course, one or other will read it because of the usual bait...

Oh and of course, JJ...

Regarding this "I don't have time for relationships because of my work", I already gave my opinion in another post.

It doesn't make any sense... After all, he supposedly had relationships years ago while filming Outlander.

---

Years ago (2019) a well-known shipper stopped believing that Sam and Caitríona had children (in secret)... One of her statements to stop believing is exactly what Sam has been using for a while to justify why he doesn't have a relationship/family. She even said that Sam would never deny his child...

Well, I don't blame this shipper, far from it... But let's be honest, SC use a lot of what we talk about here... Very little in favor and much more against shippers' beliefs.

Sam for Philippine Daily Inquirer magazine, in early 2020:

He probably added "the trauma of his father's absence" in Waypoints book, to cause commotion and be a slightly better excuse than that lame one used first?!

And the announcement of the blonde child, in August 2021, was a blow delivered using what that and other shippers started to claim. We are often our own worst enemies, even if unintentionally.

---

And what Sam said about "his daughter"... Well... He didn't lie. He doesn't have a daughter WITH MM...

😜🤣

---

It's as if the SC is always on the defensive, justifying something... Which seems strange at first, but... If Sam just said "I'm single because I want to be"... That wouldn't tease us, right? Maybe not in the same way... It probably wouldn't cause a buzz talk (here)... Anyone outside of this fandom will see just another unknown actor, who is not romantically involved with his co-star (and that's what they want).

It's been years of the same....

All of this crossed the line of ridiculousness, and when the world outside is so chaotic, sometimes it is impossible to have fun and be distracted by this circus. Sorry, Anons.

[stylessatellite]

Style’s Stylist

a stylist!y/n blurb

Warnings: fem reader, implied harry x reader (mentions it like twice)

Face claim: Jihoon Kim

A/N: k, so I lied and I’m posting my stylist!y/n blurb early. I got bored with dealing with my extended family so I finished up the piece instead. also for the authors name, I used a name generator, so if it’s your name i’m sorry.

- Feel free to like and reblog <3 | masterlist

Liked by river_johnson and 70,424 others

harryflorals: FIRST LOOK AT HARRY FOR COVENTRY NIGHT 2! via: user 1

view all 423 comments

user2: omg, praying he unzips the jacket

↳ tpwksunflower: me to 🕯️

Liked by river_johnson and 98,765 others

voguemagazine: @/river_johnson sat down with @/yourusername to discuss styling for @/harrystyles for his final leg of Love On Tour. Check it out with the link in our bio. 

view all 1,247 comments

ynfan1: so glad to know it technically wasn’t y/n responsible for some of the horrendous looks lately

Liked by river_johnson, harrystyles and 798,764 others

yourusername: sat down with @/river_johnson from @/voguemagazine to talk about styling our fav @/harrystyles. check it out here.

view all 638 comments

harry_lambert: lovely dear ❤️ see you soon

maneskinoffical: that’s our stylist! ti vogliamo bene 🩷

↳ conangray: you mean our stylist?

↳ harry&ynfan: not maneskin and conan arguing abt y/n and harry’s here enjoying his trophy boyfriend status.

harrystyles: love being each others muses ❤️❤️

article below | word count: about 1k

Styles’s Stylist

River Johnson | VOGUE

Many of you know the singer/songwriter Harry Styles. Whether it be his music, looks or daring fashion sense. Not many know the person who makes him look that good. With the last leg of Love On Tour having kicked off a couple days ago, I sat down with Y/N L/N to discuss styling for the past couple years. As one of Style’s stylists, L/N shares this position with Harry Lambert. Her other clients include Conan Gray and Måneskin.

L/N herself is dressed in custom Bode with a mint plaid set with a pair of baby pink converse to match. It’s clear that she’s planning on looking up to par with the hoards of fans outside of the stadium waiting to be let in for the second show in Coventry. She’s making me feel underdressed in my beat up air forces and dungarees. She assures me that a boa and a matching cowboy hat would have me fitting right in.

“So how has styling him been different post COVID? Have any of your creative processes changed?”

“It hasn’t been all too different from before I suppose. His looks have definitely changed, but a part of that just came with the album. Really the only difference is there’s less interviewing looks to put together because it’s only waist up now. I just have to make sure his shirt doesn't have wrinkles or a stain on it. Which is pretty easy considering we share the same wardrobe.”

“How do you come up with the different looks for each album and show? And does this differ from awards or appearances? Are there different processes? Acceptable designs?”

“I mean the process definitely depends on the event. His looks for the album are based on what he feels the mood of the album is and wardrobe is based on that. For the album he said he wanted to be more colorful and fun, so that's how we got the varying patterns. So don’t blame us for the mis matching looks, blame him (Harry).

“So I'm assuming his tour outfits are the same?”

“Yes. At the start of each leg, we’ll go through possible designs and what we feel will work best from both our (stylist & artist) sides and his opinions. Gucci and I will sketch some ideas and it’ll get sent to the group chats on which pieces we like, then we'll play mix and match and the night of the show it’s pretty much chosen by the band and him.”

“Elaborate on the band. Because I've noticed that they always seem to coordinate.”

“Yes, certain looks from the band go with certain outfits of his or at his request. If he’s wearing all black then he likes the band to wear pink for some reason. Or if some of the band's looks aren’t ready, then we’ll move that look to a different day and pull a different one.”

“Speaking of different days. I imagine it was quite the switch between show looks and award looks.”

“Oh, it actually wasn’t too bad, it was more of the execution. We had had the outfits planned for months, it was just a matter of making sure the tassels didn't tangle and the (red) carpet look came in on time. Show looks require less coordination because normally it’s just the people here”

“He also had a few outfit changes between the two events, he had what six outfits? What was that like?”

“Yeah no, he had six official outfits plus if he chose to change for an after party, which is all on him to decide, and I don't remember if he did.”

“Do you have a favorite look of his?”

“Are we talking shows? Or award wise.”

“Either”

“I mean any of the ones with the decals. It was really fun coming up with all of the different designs. Tonight’s also might win for this leg so far.”

I then proceeded to ask for a sneak peak but she just laughed me off saying how it’ll ruin one of the best parts of the show, the reveal. Upon more pestering, she revealed that color wise they were matching, which if you follow L/N tour looks, you already know. “Back to the decals. You came up with these designs? I thought you were taking a break from that?”

“I was meant to but then the idea was brought up from all of my doodles during the meetings. Plus I was working on Conan’s and the band’s (Måneskin) looks for their tours, so I was ‘cutting back’ on some work.”

Just then the fans started getting let in and I noticed just how seriously some fans took their outfits with a perfect recreation of a previous outfit or on the other side of the spectrum, various fruits. “How do you feel about the fans' outfits?”

“Oh my gosh. We all love them. They make the whole thing better and sometimes we steal inspiration from them. I swear some of the fans could steal my job and I’d be happy to let them.” She then proceeds to show me the album that she has of the fans outfits ranging from recreations of the Coachella outfits or the custom shirts with funny pictures of the band on it.

Upon wrapping up, she asks if I’m doing anything between now and the show starting. I wasn't, so she took me backstage to get a sneak peak at some upcoming outfits and let me tell you something, L/N really went all out for this last leg. The sequins, tassels everything.

Upon seeing tonight's show, I definitely agree with L/N on tonight's look being a favourite and the decal on the back making the outfit. I can definitely say that his outfits make him shine brighter and you should go see if you can snag a ticket to one of his shows to just watch how L/N’s designs enhance his performance at the very least.

A/N: lemme know if you wish to be added to my tag list

[wellofdean]

the trap anon here! i wanna second your post about enjoying sharing different thoughts about things. i really appreciate some of the more positive posts i’ve seen about the trap, like yours, reframing it to emphasize the beauty of love, compassion, and forgiveness. i do really like that.

unfortunately i’ve come to the realization that my issue with the trap feels bigger cause it relates to one of my issues with s15 overall—there’s just not enough time. thinking it through more, i’m not so much bitter about what dean says (in some part thanks to all the positive takes i’ve seen :)), but it still feels incomplete. like it goes back to the fact that yeah they don’t ever get that time to decompress. i def agree that they couldn’t get into it all then, with everything still going on and on and on. and yeah i guess ‘calmly’ was the wrong word haha, but i do think, if they had that chance, dean would be able to be a little more clear about his needs. but he never gets the chance. or rather, dean and cas don’t get to have a bigger conversation without all the weight of the world on their shoulders—they’re not allowed to by the time constraints of the season, and it seems like dean gets the short end of the stick, even with cas’s confession (cause then cas is gone 🥺), and it’s not so much the in-world or watsonian explanation but the doylist effects that disappoint me … and idk i guess this is one of those situations where i’m just not satisfied by assuming that they talked more off-screen, if that makes sense.

ahh anyway, sorry for rambling even more in your asks! i hope this isn’t weird, or like responding too much, and ofc, no pressure to respond back. but i am enjoying talking about this topic so cordially :)

First, let me say that yes! Cordial discussion! I think there is a climate of being...I dunno, afraid to disagree. I wonder if it felt like a vague-post call-out, that I made my own post and referenced things on my dash without naming any names or reblogging something, but I did that so as not to muck up anyone's notes and to not argue directly with anyone. If that was wrong, mea culpa everyone! I really just love you all for being here, four years later, still obsessed with my TV boyfriends. If not for you I would be all alone in this, losing my damn mind. And like, this is a TV show we are talking about! It's totally fine to disagree, or to feel like what you're seeing in it is more important for you! Thanks for these asks, and for being willing to discuss.

I will say that I am, generally speaking, less interested in Doylist commentary. My background is in literary theory, and even there, I am more interested in closely reading what's on the page than I am in a writer's biography or intention. I am more interested in the story they actually told than anything else. That said, I think there are genuine and in fact catastrophic Doylist issues with the end of SPN. If we are generous? COVID. If we suspect foul play? The Network PTB. For me, the ones least to blame are the writers and the actors, because what's on the screen makes it pretty clear what story they wanted to tell.

My argument about The Trap is just this: it's a beautiful scene, and Dean said things he needed to say, not because of any culpability he bears, but for the health of his own heart. It's in-character, beautifully acted, and the things he says sound right in Dean's voice. Jensen, keeper of Dean, clearly believed in it. I like the writing in that episode a lot. I think that scene is really moving, and that expecting it to be the thing that fixes them is putting too much weight on it. What I see in it is Dean unburdening his heart and needing to not let himself dwell on grievances because time is short, and love is more important, and he LOVES that angel. I love that. I love DEAN for that. It would have ruined the scene if he was saying "I'm sorry it took me until now to say it...but, Cas, man...you gotta..." Dean doesn't even know if Cas is ALIVE in that scene. He is making a desperate, last ditch effort to get himself right and tell Cas he loves him; that he forgave him a long time ago. It has to be pure grace. They were right to write it that way, imho. And then Cas doesn't let him say more, and it's because he is afraid to let himself be happy.

Can an argument be made that Cas should have told Dean about his deal with the empty? Sure! Could they have done a million other things than the things they did? INFINITELY! So, to your other point about there not being enough time in the end of SPN? and their not doing enough to let Dean say his piece, I mean... I agree? I would have preferred it if SPN never ended? Like, please let it continue literally forever? Please show me every single minute of Dean's life? I love him so, so much and I never want to live without him? Of course I wanted them to finally communicate directly about their relationship! And, make out! And then go to bed in Dean's sweet, gun be-decked room! And then have Sam burst into their room for some reason, and find them sleepily spooning (Dean's the little spoon! He deserves it!) and obviously naked! And they spring apart and Sams says "Oh, so...this is happening?" and Dean says "AND HOW!" with a big, shit-eating grin he can't suppress... Like... yes! ALL THAT. PLEASE AND THANK YOU! I will confess, though, that I don't think healthy relationship/therapy-type talks about their feelings appeal to me in the context of these characters or this story, but otherwise? Yes! I wanted it resolved.

And, Anon, I most fervently agree with you that Dean gets the short end of the stick. Like, quite literally, where, like, the stick is a piece of fucking rebar and I make no secret of the fact that the end of Supernatural, especially the last episode, is the biggest narrative shit sandwich I have ever been served and somehow choked down in all my life. It's fucking MALPRACTICE, and seriously, after Cas's beautiful goodbye, it would really have taken VERY LITTLE to satisfy me. They could have just had Cas be there in Dean's heaven, and have Dean look at him with those fucking big, wet eyes of his and hug him tight, and I would have been like...ok. I can live with that! But they did not do that. They sent my baby Dean to boring drive heaven and made him meet Sam on a bridge. I mean...fuck that. I am ready with my pitchfork!

Just...The Trap was still beautiful. It was a shining moment. Dean had never looked prettier. What he said was important FOR HIM. The forest sucked in the end, but that was a fucking beautiful tree. That's really all I'm saying.

[therese-lokidottir]

You know I definitely realize when I see loki series for first time that tva definitely bunch of bullshit. You know why?

It's simple, they literally only made peoples only have one choice, basically multiverse didn't allowing to have free will, they make multiverse only one one 'story' DNA it's multiverse literally not in fault but them all workers blame variants for the choice that tva made for them. I am sorry what?

Let's recap mobius blame loki for new York and well everything that happens by tva decision that ' this story must like this and there's no alternative' . In reality loki can be something sles but tva not allowed and then tva /mobius blame him for event that tva decided?

WTF?!! Seriously what's wrong with them, you know what I know what's wrong with them. It's bunch of bullshit, and many claims that tva is only make sure fate keep happens but that not how fate work. Fate is something that keep exist even you take different path that is fate. Fate not taken choices and paths.fate is something that keep exist.

From all tv series in COVID time, loki season 2 definitely many problems like many, the reason peoples just realized how problematic the series was because well it's tom, and people felt bored in COVID and they will take anything in that time.

Something that annoys me about the Loki series is the personal reason, that I am a pedantic nerd and I don't like how the series fundamental doesn't understand the Marvel multiverse. Marvel has done so many multiverse stories, Spiderverse came out three years prior to Loki. So the series annoys me when it's trying to claim it's the most important thing when it's so unimpressive and confused in its lore.

I've discussed this plenty of times. Mobius's character makes no sense. Because from his perspective Loki is just acting out a script and he'll be killed if he doesn't. Mobius is someone who wants to judge others but never wants to think for himself or consider the full implications of what he's doing. What he is supposed to believe is people are just acting out the timekeepers' will.

The TVA are the ones stomping out free will and forcing things to only happen one way. That is what is stated in the show. Even if Waldron tried to fill in the blanks in an interview it still makes no sense.

The series never makes the distinction between fate and the way people truly are vs what is the results of Kang's meddling.

[destinyc1020]

I completely agree with you and your anons. You have young, award-winning celebs who have no social media presence, like Jennifer Lawrence, Emma Stone, and Ruth Negga. They don’t have any trouble booking roles. Social media certainly helps with brand deals, but at this point in her career, Z wouldn’t need it at all for acting. She’s huge, well-known, and in demand. To me, reducing her online activity makes sense. She doesn’t find it fun anymore and I don’t blame her for putting up boundaries surrounding it.

THANK YOU!!! Someone on Z's level does NOT need social media...at all in fact lol. 😊She's not an up-and-coming actress who barely anybody knows that needs to drum up excitement for her or her work. I agree with you too Anon. Reducing her online activity actually makes sense/? 😄

And I totally agree, if she's not finding any fun in it anymore (which, I personally have not been either since Covid tbh), then she doesn't have to post anything!

She might be under obligation from her team to post for certain large projects of hers, but other than that? She really doesn't need to post.

[crossdressingdeath]

how do you feel about veilguard taking place ten years after dai? it seems like a weird decision for me. (at first i even thought they did this purely to match the amount of real world time that passed, before i realized that gamedev doesn't happen instantly and there probably were delays due to covid so it's probably not that)

like, as you said when answering another ask, it's been so long that there is little reason for people to care or to mention things that happened. and personally, trespasser gave me kind of a sense of urgency, that we have little time left before solas does whatever he does, but apparently it takes at least a decade. i don't know, i just feel like a shorter timeskip (3-5 years) would have been better for this.

I think it might actually be because it's been so long since the last game. They might have increased the timeskip when it became clear that it was going to be a long time before the game was ready to ship (between them basically completely starting over when they escaped EA multiplayer hell and Covid this game is definitely coming out way later than it was originally supposed to); separating DAV from the previous games means the players don't need to have super clear memories of those previous games, because no one in-universe would either.

I'm pretty neutral on the ten year jump, personally. It's good in terms of simplifying the worldstate (which... okay I don't like how Bioware handled it but I really don't blame them for wanting to slim down the variables, just thinking about writing in variations for every single mentioned event across all three previous games is giving me a headache), and since we know from Tevinter Nights that Solas has been active throughout it doesn't feel to me like he was just sitting around doing nothing; he wasn't immediately prepared and it took him some time to get moving, I can run with that. Also, it justifies none of our new companions appearing in DAI; they're all highly regarded in their respective fields, many of them are well known, and I'd argue most of them would have been useful during DAI. Hell, Lucanis is even a specialized Venatori killer. By making the timeskip ten years instead of 3-5 Bioware has created a situation where most of them would've been at the very least way less experienced and well known, and possibly too young to be active in their field at all for the youngest among them (like Taash, who I think is confirmed early-mid twenties and so would've been a teenager during DAI).

[thebvbbletea]

Hi there I'm a new deobi and I was wondering if you could explain the IST entertainment lore to me and how they're a bad company (I thought that they were one of the chill ones 😭) and also the Eric hiatus lore and when he came back for 'ROAR' era. I'm soooo confused 😭

(BTW loveeeee ur page 😭🤍)

Hello! Welcome to the fandom!!! I'm so so happy whenever I find a new deobi 🥺 IST entertainment is previously named Cre.ker entertainment, but in 2021, they decide to merger with Play M entertainment and become IST. And imo, Cre.ker > IST.

Cre.ker is not a perfect agency, they have a bad management when it comes to handling a rumor, like for example when Q & Eric was involved in a dating rumor with Nancy & Jiwon, they made them deny the rumor and appologize in person in front of deobis in their fansign instead of making official announcement. BUT, at least The Boyz have a tons of creative production when they still in Cre.ker. They have a contents such as A to BOYZ and Be Your Own King, which supposed to highlight the creative side of each of them. They also always actively including the members when it comes to their creative minds. When Hyunjun (or Hwall when he was still in The Boyz) goes on hiatus, they also keep updating us regularly on his health situation.

Meanwhile, after Cre.ker become IST, A to BOYZ suddenly stop. Many members like Sangyeon, Eric, Haknyeon, New & Kevin still hasn't got their own A to BOYZ content to this day. They also didn't appreciate members involvement in the production, like for example how they never thank Kevin everytime he helps on english translation for their content or doesn't credit him when he helps write a lyrics for Passion Fruit.

They also really really really bad at handling the situation whenever there are a member who goes on a hiatus (I also gonna explain Eric hiatus lore and it will be long, so bare with me 😭). When it was a covid outbreak and they supposed to stay at home, some deobis found out that Eric is going out with his friends. Later on, he is diagnosed positive with covid. All the members also got tested, and Younghoon, Hyunjae, Haknyeon are also positive. IST make an announcement, and they also include the part where Eric is hanging out with his friends in their announcement.

Because of this, Eric got so much hate from k-netz and akgaes. They blame him for making another members got infected by covid. People are sending him a lot of hate comments, which is doesn't make senses, because he also got sick. After this, they announcing that Eric will go on hiatus because of mental health issue. When he was on hiatus, we got zero updates of him from IST. We got no update on his well being, we got no update on his health situation, we got no update when will he comeback. And we as a deobi, got so scared that he will leave the group, because in the same period, IST announcing that Weeekly's Jiyoon is leaving the group following her hiatus on mental health issues.

From March to September 2022, we have zero updates on him. Only in September, they make a statement that he will comeback. And in November, we finally could relieved when they posting a poster of The B Road fancon with Eric on it and he finally posting on their official instagram account. And lastly he finally joined their comeback on Roar.

This zero update on hiatus member not only applied to Eric. They also did this to Hyunjae & Sunwoo, when they suddenly goes on hiatus because of injury without any official statement on their health condition. This also applied to Haknyeon when he goes on hiatus last year. He goes on hiatus for a long time without any updates on his health situation.

They also always make member clarified things by themselves. Just like when Sangyeon goes on controversy because people think he say bad words, there are no official statement from IST and instead they make him clarified things on bubbles. They also known for giving mistreatment to some members, such as giving them few lines on a song or even didn't gave any content to some members.

In conclusion, even though I love every single song & concept that The Boyz released under IST entertainment, but they are so so so bad in term of managing them. They didn't know how to communicate well with fans and they didn't know how to properly appreciate every single member's hard work. So I really really hope they will find another agency that gonna treat them well and boost their popularity. Because istg, they have so so so much potential if their agency treat them well 😔

[88y53]

Marvel's What If S2E7–What Marvel Used To Be (spoiler warning)

If you're like me then you've probably been disappointed by the MCU's recent output, and What If isn't excluded from that list.

However, "What If Hela Found the Ten Rings?" gives us a brief glimpse into what Marvel used to be like and why I liked it in the first place.

Rather than Odin locking Hela away in Hel, he banishes her to Earth, ala Thor 1, but this time in China, where she manages to learn a bit of humility.

Here in lies how Marvel made a brief return to form:

We have an intriguing character

They go through an arc (here a redemption quest)

The trademark Marvel quippiness is used–get this–for characterization

IT MAKES SENSE that Hela would be flippant because a) she was like that in Ragnarok, and b) she's bitter about her current situation.

I know Marvel has increasingly come under fire for it's over-reliance on tension-breaking humor and quips, but that's mainly because they've needed to cover over the obvious stitching together of the movies in the wake of COVID and the writer's strike.

Of course, it's not exactly fair to blame that entirely on those two events–Marvel is getting lazy and falling back on bad habits.

Thankfully, this series being a little easier to make than the live-action films and shows, they remember a very important rule with these stories–know when tension doesn't need to be broken.

Like the moment when Hela can't lift her crown (a call-back to when Thor couldn't lift his hammer), or when she goes on a quieter contemplative montage of letting go of her toxic war mentality that Odin instilled in her.

And the moment when Odin abuses a puppy Fenris to teach her a lesson is completely free of any obnoxious comedy cut-ins.

THIS is what Marvel used to be.

The story kind of falls short in the third arc for me, but I guess it wouldn't be a Marvel movie without a bad Third Act that makes up for it in the very last scene.

Cate Blanchett absolutely brings her A-game in this, which deserves high praise because voice acting is notoriously difficult for film actors to master.

I genuinely would love to see more of this Goddess of Peace Hela, and I would hope to see Marvel learn from this level of quality going forward.

[bisluthq]

I saw people saying they remembered articles from February 2020 about Jason and Olivia separating but living together because of covid and the children, which disappeared around January. To me, the timeline doesn't make sense. Why was Jason perfectly happy with Olivia saying they split in February 2020 in the first article in November 2020 if he already knew about Harry? Also, Harry’s team putting an article out saying he wasn't to blame for this affair, and he was told they weren't together less than 12 hours later was funny.

Look, essentially you have three separate teams (Olivia’s, Jason’s and Harry’s) all doing separate things + the DWD promo team/the studio’s doing its own thing. Then you have the three of them also all doing their own separate things. I don’t think we’ll ever know exactly what happened because obviously they all have reasons to lie lol and did and will. Jason would obviously not want to have been publicly cucked - no man, let alone a Gen Xer man who’s very much a dude - would want that out there. It’s not imo that sympathetic to have had your BM fuck Harry Styles while living with you, it’s kind of deeply embarrassing. So I can see him also being invested in rewriting the timeline to look like he was less of a cuckold. Olivia obviously lies (we know this) so she likely was lying to both men. Harry wouldn’t want to be seen as splitting up a family tbh so whatever he knew or didn’t know like he also would’ve been invested in making the timeline like… more palatable lol so Jason and Olivia split up but were amicable co-parents and then he and Olivia started dating like that’s obviously a better version to put out than “Olivia cheated”? Especially since they still had the movie to put out so like 💀💀💀

idk man people who aren’t even famous lie and fudge timelines. My partner’s ex told people she met her AP the night he (my bf/her ex/her then husband) kicked her out and that they met on accident. She said she got kicked out after a big blowout fight, it was the middle of the night (this part is true) and she went to a friend’s house (unclear if this is true) because she was upset (probably true) etc and this new guy coincidentally happened to be staying there and that’s when they met. But like that’s not true lol. She got kicked out because her then husband saw messages on her phone from this other guy after she came home late and drunk after a meet up with this guy. Odds are she actually went to that guy’s house tbh and she def knew him - biblically - at that stage. But she tried to lie about it lol because saying “I got caught cheating and my husband told me to GTFO” isn’t a very sympathetic story. She also apparently then changed that story a bit when probed and like said my partner was distant and cold and shit and basically emotionally abusive which drove her to cheat/look for other guys lol. Again, more of a sympathetic story than “she cheated and got caught”. She also well likely believes some version of that second story idk she probably thinks if my bf/her ex was different then she wouldn’t have cheated. But also she stayed with the AP until he died in COVID because he was an anti vaxxer and anti masker and stuff but also recent tea I obtained through mutual friends because I’m xoxo gossip girl tbh heavily suggests that she cheated on that new/now dead guy too so maybe she should be asking herself why she keeps cheating lol idk.

Idk that lady’s thought processes like she’s just super fucking crazy imo and kinda a bad person. Not because she’s my bf’s ex because especially when I’ve been pissed at him I’ve investigated this and y’all know how much I like doing detective work and I really am a girls’ girl (pussies included and like he is not wrong in that she’s attractive so my drunk ass one time was like “how funny would it be if her and I got together” and then I truly FBI’d) and I’ve actively wanted to know like what he lied about (because everybody lies) or where the piping hot tea is being poured (I want to be there) but what I keep coming up with… is she is a crazy ass cunt lol who lies and cheats and has done so since she was a teenager (because a friend of hers from school is still mutuals with both her and my bf and I quizzed her - subtly - and like… bruh this lady is insane lol which actually at the time was an L for me because it was during our break and I was trying to prove he is always the problem).

my point is people involved in cheating generally speaking lie so idk why you’d expect to figure out exactly who knew what and when about complete strangers. I wouldn’t trust like friends’ versions of their cheating accounts 100% let alone the cheating accounts of total strangers. I assume Jason, Olivia and Harry all lied (to each other and to their teams and their teams lied too because it was a bad vibe situation???)

I’m not sure who the crazy ass cunt is in their situation. All or none idk. Could go either way.

[qqueenofhades]

Got into a debate with a Pro-Trump coworker and she mentioned that Trump initially had a travel ban to Europe in the beginning of the COVID pandemic and apparently holds it against Biden because he said a travel ban to Europe was xenophobic. I didn't believe her at first, but after some research it's true that Biden did call that travel ban xenophobic, so... why? Is there other context for the ban that I'm missing? That was arguably the only responsible Trump did with this whole thing.

I mean... literally everything Trump did was xenophobic in some way, and focused heavily on blaming foreigners, and even if it was the correct thing to do, you doubtless remember how utterly chaotic the first days of COVID were, how nobody knew anything, nobody was sure what to think, and the CDC was heavily influenced by Trump and co. trying to play it down as much as possible. So like, your coworker is holding one statement, made in the early days of COVID when Trump very much was being xenophobic about the "China virus," against Biden??? That... that doesn't make sense. Then again, it's not like I really expect the MAGA crowd to do so, but like... you're just going to ignore the rest of Trump's (disastrous) Covid response, if that's something you really care about??? Or.... or what???

Biden a) knew as much about Covid in the early days as we did, and b) WAS NOT THE PRESIDENT IN MARCH 2020 AND WAS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR MANAGING THE FEDERAL RESPONSE. That was Trump, and he blew it, even if he managed to do one correct thing while very much spewing xenophobic rhetoric the whole time. So yet again, if you really want to, you can point that out, but arguing with these people is generally pointless. Still, this just makes absolutely NO sense to me. As usual, alas.

[ileftherbackhome]

An interesting but probably inaccurate reading of seven is that the "you" she is referring to is her past self because taylor has spoken many times about "not be able to recognize yourself" in many songs- esp break up songs where she is moving on and growing from the experience.

She started music lessons at age 8, so the last time she was truly free would be age 7 if we are talking about freedom from her desire to be famous-and all that entails. I think you can read the lyrics as this kind of mourning for the last time you felt you could truly be yourself and that's kind of really sad honestly.

At some point in time, taylor wanted to go back to when she was seven and just make a different choice maybe. One that would lead her down a different path where she could be "free" to not "hide in the closet." Probably 2016 after the canceling, and that's probably why she wrote this is my trying and that's why it comes after August.

It's her way of making sense of her fame related trauma and all that entails, I think. Like I've already talked about mirrorball into seven into August and how that is a sad run about her feelings on why she lost karlie but you can actually continuing piecing the narrative together since

This is me trying -> I think this song is about learning how to be okay with being queer, being famous, accepting what being famous actually is and learning to be okay with that

Illicit Affairs -> learning to be okay with your worst decisions and learning how to see a dead relationship for what it is, letting all of that go in order to move onto bigger and better things

Invisible String -> looking back at her journey into fame and realizing that the one good thing to come out of all of that was ending up at the met gala in 2016 to meet Joe, the love of her life for real this time.

Mad Woman -> this is about her anger at the masters situation. But also it can be specifically about how angry she is that her ex girlfriend betrayed her and sold her out to her worst enemy. This is lover era grief.

Epiphany -> this is about covid forcing her into lockdown and forcing her to not think about music or her career and just making music for the fun of it helped "get the poison out" of her. But I also think this is about her realizing how her actions during kissgate etc lead to the demise of their relationship. I think covid really helped taylor process trauma but also learn how to take accountability for her past mistakes without being afraid of being labeled as "bad" for it.

Betty -> the reason I say this is because Betty is about James (taylor James) apologizing to karlie "Betty" kloss for doing "the worst thing" she ever did to her. I think this is a reference to her forcing karlie in the closet and that is why karlie sold her out/told taylor not to mention her in her coming out promo (therefore forcing her in the closet so that she knows how it feels.... vindictive speculation on my end but ouch if it doesn't make for a good story). This is Taylor learning how to accept her own role to play in her closet in and learning how to shift the blame to the proper things (her label, her decisions, homophobia in the industry) instead of pointing the finger outward all the time.

Peace -> this feels like a declaration of acceptance of things she cannot change. She feels like her fame causes her relationships to die, but here is asking if it alright if you never have peace because of me? We know the answer is yes, so this is like a song I think she wrote to remind herself that her fears about fame getting in the way of her current relationship are in her head. They're not reality, and that internal turmoil is like the perfect representation of how mental illness can affect a relationship.

Hoax -> this is the hardest song for me to interpret because it is shrouded in metaphors and I am autistic 🤪 but I think this was given to us out of order on purpose as an easter egg for like "I have more to say about this actually." Because I think hoax into evermore is an interesting bridge piece. We know she is in a good place currently but hoax is about returning us back to turmoil and leaving us there for 5 months before giving us an even clearer look into the kaylor relationship.

The lakes -> I think that's why she talks about this being the real ending to folklore because this song is a really poetic representation of learning to leave things behind that don't matter. It gives me "the secret to holding on was all that letting go" vibes and I think it's on purpose. Like, she left us on hoax but that's not where she is mentally so she gave us the lakes to close out folklore fully.

[pisceanvixen]

Anger, healing, & everything in between

I've always told myself and others that healing isn't linear. There's no one correct way to heal from past traumas and abuse. In a sense, it tends to come in stages...much like the workings of grief. It's kind of like you're grieving the person you were before you started healing yourself. And that comes with everything. The good, the bad, the beautiful, and the ugly.

The one thing I do understand the most about healing is that you're actually growing into the new you. You're forever changing and growing into the person that you're meant to be. However, that also means letting go of past tendencies and people who make your growth stagnant.

In this third pregnancy, I've learned to finally let go of those who didn't suit me or my well being. I've stopped communicating with individuals who only really provided me with a one way friendship. I stayed friends with people because they were exes (in attempt to keep the peace, but who am I kidding? Ex-girlfriends absolutely despise me & their jealousy speaks volumes), girlfriends of close friends, or just friends with my husband. But my connections with those people shouldn't feel like a weight, right? I explained to Avery how I felt and how uncomfortable and disrespectful these people have been to me. He understood and he didn't question it. And I've never had to question his loyalty and respect for me. So, we both just simply deleted these people off of our Instagram or explained to some that we will no longer be communicating with them.

Then this leads me to anger. Now, that I'm pregnant again...weed has not been in my life. I've been having to deal with an immense amount of new and returning feelings. During my pregnancy with my daughter, I felt a mixture of sadness, excitement, and happiness. The sadness was mainly because I was pregnant during 2020. The events of COVID and constant social injustices made me feel so much more then I already felt. My mother always told me that I care too deeply, mainly because I'm a highly sensitive being (to which my daughter is as well). So, I feel the sadness and anger of others so intently and deeply, that it genuinely hurts me too. However, I always felt such kindness being pregnant at that time. As hard as it was to believe there was any good in humanity, I saw it. I felt it, too.

But with this pregnancy, I feel nothing but rage, contempt, and anger. I was starting to worry because I felt that all this anger was so unhealthy and stressful, especially for the baby. However, I learned. that anger was apart of the healing process. I spent so much time being sad and feeling like I deserved what happened to me. I felt like I blamed myself for a lot of things that weren't even in my line of control. And now, I'm angry. I'm angry that I was mistreated. I am angry because I deserved better. I am angry because I wish I could go back in time and hug the old me; tell my old self that it wasn't my fault. That it was okay to feel sad, but not okay to harm myself in ways that I did.

Anger is your friend. It protects you because it knows you deserve better then what you received. It's helping you realize that what happened to you wasn't okay and it was never right. People think that anger isn't a part of healing... but it is. It's not a lifestyle, but a mere stepping stone into the next stage of your life. It's a part of your grief...to the person you once were. And once I've let my anger take its course, I realized that I can finally start to repair the damages and unlearn the unhealthy habits I've taken place in before.

Don't get me wrong though, just because I'm healing doesn't mean I won't kick your ass if necessary. I just want people to know that's obviously my last resort to disrespect.

And please, if you're reading this then understand that anger is a human feeling. You're not any less of an adult because you get upset over someone disrespecting you. You're not childish just because you yelled at a man for disrespecting your boundaries at a bar. I'm not inciting violence, I'm saying that you should allow yourself to feel those feelings fully and wholeheartedly so that you can finally move on. Pent up anger that's just been pushed aside or hidden under the shitty advice of "oh don't be so angry" or "move on" comments will just lead to worse consequences for yourself.

Be human. Feel your damn feelings and grow into the best possible version of yourself.