#if there's anything in particular you'd like changed- like a more specific wish for the manga panel used- feel free to tell me

[thelastunison]

@zolotishkopodsnegom Last time people requested these low res pride icons, they did so per asks

I did two versions of the boutarou one since I wasn't sure if you prefered the classic gay flag or the ocean one

[jo-harrington]

Stranger Than (Fan)Fiction - Chapter 4: Reader Suggestions

Previous Chapter: Lore Dump

Summary: Things start to get a little strange when The Writer hits the dreaded Writer's Block and looks for some inspiration.

Word Count: 4.9k

Pairing: Eddie Munson/Fem!Reader

Warnings/Themes: No-Upside-Down AU, Fluff, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Chaos, SMUT?, Cockblocking?, Isekai, Mentions of FOI-compliant events and characters, Various References to Movies and Television, Probably a little more lore (just assume that theres gonna be bits of lore everywhere), Criticism of Fanfiction, Analysis of Fanfiction/Fandom, Meta Fiction

Note: This is more of a "filler episode" to establish some of the rules of Eddie and Reader's predicament than anything specifically plot-driven, until the end. You could say that I myself felt a little bit of Writer's Block...not necessarily because I couldn't get anything onto a page but that it wasn't happening for this story in particular. (Coincidental that it happened at this specific chapter. Almost like I planned it that way. Maybe I did.)

So please forgive me if anything feels a little rusty; I'm getting back on this bicycle after a few months of letting it sit in the garage. But I'm happy I get to take it for a spin again. We're in it for the Tour de France now lads! Or we die trying.

You can find my masterlist here.

Please do not interact if you are not 18+.

Enjoy!

You know, in a previous life, if someone told you that you'd be laughing in the face of a bloodthirsty, murderous vampire, you would probably think it was impossible.

That was, unfortunately, the reality you lived in right now.

Red, veiny, monstrous eyes. Sharp fangs. Hissing and roaring.

And you just snickering like an idiot with a death wish.

Probably because you knew it wasn't actually a death wish.

Your arrival in Mystic Falls was an interesting and exciting one. Mainly because of how normal it was.

It was a small town and everyone seemed friendly enough and you were truly ready for it to be a break in the action. Despite it being another so-called "modern" or "futuristic" setting.

Futuristic to you, at least. Still a bit stuck in your 1985 mindset, 2009 seemed beyond your imagination. More than the 90s had been, or 2004. Still not as bad as when one of the Writers shoved you onto the USS Enterprise so you could woo Bones McCoy. And certainly not 100 Trillion years in the future, at the end of the Universe with The Doctor.

Still, you were happy for a change of pace. So you chugged into town with your trusty Beetle like you usually did, until you made it to the large house on Maple Street that was the new residence of your supposed "college best friend," Jenna Sommers.

You liked Jenna, actually. She was sweet and funny and hated the hoity-toity elites of the town's Founding Families. She dragged you to all the Historical Society events just to have an ally, and those nights were always a hoot. You'd gossip about the mayor's affair with so-and-so, drink free booze til you saw double, and stuff your tiny handbags with their expensive hors d'oeuvres.

After years of traveling through various universes, and over analyzing your friendships back in Port Geneva, she was a breath of fresh air and someone you truly cherished.

She also set you up with her boyfriend's best frenemy--her words, not yours--Damon Salvatore.

And he seemed fine.

Great, actually.

A normal, sarcastically funny, suave, handsome sort of guy who took you out a few times and always behaved like a gentleman, and kissed better than anyone you'd ever kissed before.

Until this very moment, where the penny dropped, and he roared in your face with his fangs.

And you just laughed in his.

Because of course he was a vampire.

Of course you couldn't have a nice, normal thing.

Once.

Ever.

December 1986

If Eddie thought his life had been out of control before, it was safe to say that the moment he realized that it was being controlled by some Writer in another universe, it only got worse.

For a few days, there had been a break in the madness.

Well, there were some things that still fucked with Eddie's head.

Some of the posters on his walls were for bands he didn't like, his collection of exclusively DC comics became an array of Marvel titles, and his stash of porn...needless to say it was full of shit he'd never even thought about before.

He still jerked off to it, though. What else was he gonna do? Not jerk off?

But there were no out-of-body feelings, no wacky spectacles in class, no unexpected emergencies. The trailer even stayed clean for a whole week; it was a godsend.

"Does that mean it's all over?" Eddie asked when you'd arrived at his trailer for a night in.

"Unfortunately not," you sighed. "I don't know the ins and outs of it. Sometimes the story proceeds as planned. Sometimes you get long stretches of time where nothing happens. You've heard of Writer's Block? Maybe they're having trouble trying to figure out what's next for us."

"Why don't they just give up?" he huffed. "Leave us alone."

"Would you give up if you were trying to figure out some complicated plot for Hellfire?"

"Yeah, but that's different. It's just DnD. These are our lives that this asshole is playing with."

"And what if, somewhere, Agrithor the Invincible is real and getting mad because Jeff rolled a Nat 1 on a medicine check and now he has dysentery."

Eddie didn't know if he was cranky because you were right, or a little more in love with you because you had been listening to him rant about Hellfire.

"It's a learning curve," you continued. "It gets weird when you start to think of your life like a story someone is writing, waiting for the next thing to happen. Trust me. I learned that the hard way."

"So what should I do? Just go with the flow?"

"You need to, otherwise you start second guessing what's real and what isn't with everything."

"Hmmm..." He tilted his head from side to side considering your words. What's real and what isn't. A loaded statement in this predicament the two of you found yourselves in.

"So let's just enjoy our night in," you said with finality. "What's the plan? Fraggle Rock and fooling around?" You glanced around him to the setup on the coffee table. VHS tapes and cans of soda and a bowl of popcorn.

Eddie felt his cheeks getting hot with embarrassment.

"Speaking of what's real...I, uh, thought it might be fun for us to watch a few episodes of Port Geneva?"

You looked at him like he'd grown a second head; your brows raised in question, mouth dropping open in shock.

"I just...have some questions about things that didn't really make sense," he was quick to explain. "Continuity errors. Who better to ask than someone who was there?"

It took a second, but you broke down into laughter and you threw your hands up in defeat.

"You know what, as long as you order us pizza too, fuck it. Fine! Let's see what all the commotion is about."

That had been the last truly fun night for a little while--

His tapes were paused more than they played because you kept getting up to rant about scenes you disagreed with, or stories that the producers of the show simply got wrong, or key scenes that had been cut altogether.

Every time you'd get up and shout and talk with your hands and point at him to get him to understand...he loved you more and more...

--and Eddie felt bad for not taking advantage of the normalcy for as long as he could.

Because things started getting weird.

First Christmas had come, and it had been a joy.

Munson Christmases were simple affairs. More of a day for hearty food and relaxation than for any traditions or celebrations. You'd of course joined in, along with Granny Ecker, who lamented over Ronnie not being able to come home for the holiday.

Both Granny and Wayne had conspired to get you and Eddie under the mistletoe though, and had ooh'd and ahh'd when your lips met several times over the course of the night.

But Eddie looked forward to New Year's a little more than Christmas; he and the guys typically shot fireworks at the quarry and TP'd all of the jocks' houses in the middle of the night. You'd had similar New Years celebrations with your friends back in Port Geneva, so he figured it would be a treat for you to join them.

Except New Year's Eve never came.

On what was supposed to be the 31st, Eddie slept in, anticipating he'd be up all night with you and the guys. He got his backpack ready with supplies and walked out of his bedroom, only to find Wayne in the kitchen cooking.

"Did we have plans I forgot about?" he asked his uncle.

Wayne crossed his arms over his chest and frowned at him.

"You getting sick, kid?" he asked. "Don't know how you could forget about Christmas."

Christmas?!

"But it's," Eddie scoffed, "it's New Years' Eve."

Wayne opened his mouth to respond when there was a knock at the door, and after a beat, you walked in with several grocery bags in hand.

"Hey guys," you greeted cheerfully. "Merry Christmas!"

Wayne repeated the sentiment and motioned for Eddie to go and help you.

"M-Merry, uh, Christmas sweetheart," he said with heavy sarcasm as he reached your side. You shot Eddie a very pointed stare. "What's going on?"

"Just go with the flow," you muttered to him, leaving no time for explanation before you and Wayne started chatting.

So that's exactly what he did.

And truly, there wasn't anything wrong about having a second Christmas.

You'd baked cookies and he'd helped you decorate them; you kissed icing off the tip of his nose and then he'd serenaded you and Wayne with carols on his guitar while It's a Wonderful Life played in the background. He honestly had so much fun, all of his complaints and questions got put to the wayside

It was the fact that the following day brought yet another Christmas.

"Alright," he demanded when you'd arrived to make popcorn garlands with him. "What the hell is going on?"

"A time loop." You explained. "A request loop, actually. The Writer must have asked for Holiday-themed requests from their readers to get themselves out of their slump. Not the first time I've been through this."

"And everyone chose Christmas?" he scoffed. "Damn, these people are boring. Halloween is the best holiday, obviously!"

"Obviously," you laughed.

"Or April Fool's Day!"

"It must be December in their world too." You cupped his face in your hands. "Listen, request loops suck and they're boring. But trust me, you got lucky that it's just holidays. It could be worse."

So of course it got worse.

Because Eddie Munson could never get so lucky as fate taking it easy on him.

The requests didn't stop with Holidays--although, it had been a nauseating gauntlet of Christmases and Thanksgivings, with one Valentine's Day and a 4th of July thrown in for good measure--they extended to other things too.

Eddie had woken up one morning with the word "faucet" stuck in his head.

No rhyme or reason.

Just "faucet."

He suspected that The Writer had something to do with it, especially as he felt a strange anticipation to interject the word into conversation at some point in the day. Like he was compelled to say it in every sentence and every conversation, but none of them felt right.

Only when Dave had gone to get a drink from the water fountain and had stuck his entire mouth on the spigot did Eddie get any relief.

"Fuck Dave, you don't know how many germs are on that faucet?" he practically gasped as the weight on his chest and his mind finally alleviated.

It happened again a few days later. An insatiable need to talk about "root beer floats" all throughout the day, until the evening when he picked you up for a date.

It had been a great date, sure, but he hated root beer.

Finally, it was the word "alluring." Not one that was usually a part of his vocabulary, but this Writer seemed to want to teach Eddie a lesson by using some fancy word.

This time, the key word was said to you during a steamy make out session on your couch. Eddie's lips traveled down the column of your throat, sucking at your pulse, and he told you how alluring you were. Your moan was delicious, and no matter how true the statement was or how much he wanted to continue, he simply couldn't find the desire to.

The moment felt tainted. All of them did. No matter how funny or sweet or hot they were; the knowledge that he was just a puppet on the Writer's strings was a sour feeling and he just couldn't shake it.

You held him in your arms as he lamented about the lack of control he felt.

"I'm sorry," you whispered into his hair as you rubbed soothing circles over his back and shoulders. "I wish I could make it better. I wish I could make it all go away."

Eddie was just so overcome with emotions and feeling so unlike himself that he asked, "what if you could?"

You paused your movements and strained to look at him, confused.

"What...what do you mean?"

"I don't..." He closed his eyes and sighed. "I don't know what I mean."

Yes he did.

The thoughts had begun to form the moment the words exited his mouth, until they were a tempest swirling in his mind.

"Ok," you simply dismissed, and then continued your attentions.

"Actually," he couldn't stop himself then. He pushed himself away from you and stared directly into your eyes. "I...this all started because you came to Hawkins. So maybe...maybe if you tried to leave."

He immediately saw the heartbreak in your eyes, and he knew he fucked up.

"Do you want me to leave?" you questioned softly.

Everything inside of him screamed no. Of course he didn't want you to leave. In fact, he wanted the opposite of that; he wanted you to stay with him forever. He'd been willing to sell his soul to the devil just for the chance to have you, have someone who understood him the way you did.

He was just...so...tired.

So tired in that moment, he could only focus on his own desperation. His own feelings. He hadn't even thought to consider yours.

"I just...have you ever tried to leave?" he wondered. "You said you get in your car and you come to all of these worlds; that's how you travel into these stories. Have you ever tried to get back into your car and leave? Back to Port Geneva?"

"I don't," you shook your head rapidly, hands held up in front of your face as though you were trying to manifest a physical version of the idea just so you could conceptualize it. "I don't even know how I could. Or where I would go? How to get there?"

"You said that there were times when you got to go back."

"But I'd just end up there," you explained. "I've never decided on my own that it was time to go. I don't have a map."

"Maybe that'd be the end of it all," Eddie grabbed your hands in his. "That's the key to breaking the cycle. If you decided that you wanted to leave, if you tried to go home, the Writer would be compelled to give up and our lives could both go back to normal."

Your eyes darted between his, and you calmly repeated the question, "Eddie do you want me to leave?"

He hesitated so you continued.

"You said we were in this together. You said you'd help keep me grounded and I would do the same for you." You took a deep breath and repeated yourself for a third time. "Do you want me to leave?"

It was an eternity of waiting before he finally answered.

"No, of course not." You pulled your gaze away from his, your face crumpling in a way that made his heart ache. "I just figured...it was just an idea. And it couldn't hurt to try."

He tried to talk, tried to explain himself, and went on rambling for minutes on end. He even stood up and started pacing, hands running through his hair anxiously.

He cursed the Writer for doing this to you, cursed the Writer's Block for putting the two of you in this kind of a position in the first place. Cursed the Gods and Devils for making such an inescapable Hell in the first place.

He hoped the more he talked the more you'd see his frustration, his side of things.

Or at the very least, you'd try to fight him. Yell at him. Tell him he was wrong.

But you just nodded along, refusing to look at him.

It's a learning curve, you'd told him.

Because you'd been through this a million times before, lived this nightmarish life that he was now getting to experience for the first time. Shit, you'd even loved people before you'd come here and started having feelings for him.

Loved and lost and left. Whether you wanted to or not.

He thought he'd understood that. You had thought that he thought he'd understood.

But maybe he didn't. If he thought that getting you to go was the magic solution.

He realized, in that second that he stared at you and you stared at the floor, that this life wasn't the only learning curve for him.

And he wasn't the only one with something to learn either.

You both needed to adapt.

It's a learning curve.

He decided, with a soft kiss to the side of your head and a "see you later sweetheart," that it was better to leave and give you both the space to think and adapt, instead of just standing there digging himself into a deeper hole.

It would get better.

It had to.

But who knew what tomorrow would bring?

He was on a stage playing for a crowd of thousands.

It wasn't the biggest venue they played but it was the only sold out show on the tour.

They were all singing along with him, cheering. His friends, his bandmates, surrounding him and supporting him.

The lights were blinding, he was sweating, and his fingers tapped against the fretboard rapidly until it felt like they would bleed.

He played the last few notes of the song and then threw his arm up in the air with a flourish, all to the backdrop of their cheers.

He saw his face on shirts in the crowd, saw his name, heard them chant his name.

"Eddie...Eddie...Eddie..."

He basked in the majesty of it all, so far from his meek beginnings, so far from Hawkins. If he really thought about it, he didn't even feel like himself anymore. He felt like more.

It felt great.

It felt powerful.

And it was everything he ever wanted.

He pulled the earpiece from his ear and spoke into the microphone as Dave and Jeff threw picks into the crowd.

"Thank you guys...you've been great." He laughed as they cheered for him again. "Port Geneva is one of our favorite places to play. It feels like a little bit of home away from home. The best shows, the best crowds. The best food. Anyone else going to Bonnie's after the show?"

There was a roar of applause again.

"Maybe we'll see you there. It's the main reason we keep coming back here. I always get the Number 7 on Rosemary Bread."

There was a lone boo from the pit; he pulled the mike from the stand and took a few steps to the edge of the stage, eyeing the people for the source of said boo.

There was a couple; a handsome, conventional-looking guy with very neatly combed hair, who wore a flannel over a tee from their first tour. And a girl, pretty--main character pretty--with a hand-written poster in her hands...scolding her boyfriend under her breath.

Bingo.

"We don't like hecklers at our show but if you have a better order than mine I think you need to share it with the class," Eddie grinned at them. There was something familiar about the guy...and the girl...he just couldn't place where he'd seen them before. He shook off the feeling. "Come on, I won't bite."

"If you're not getting the Bonnie Special," the guy shouted up at him, "then you're not doing it right."

The crowd around them boo'd but Eddie stopped them.

"No, no," he chuckled. "I like a guy who knows what he wants. Very metal of you man. What's your name?"

"Patrick."

"Nice to meet you Patrick. I'm Eddie." The crowd laughed. "But seriously no Rosemary bread? That's ok. More for me."

He put the earpiece back in and turned back to the guys, ready to do what he did best: keep playing.

---

Once the show was over, he and the guys indeed made a stop at Bonnie's.

The little sandwich shop was overrun with fans wanting to meet them. He shook hands and signed autographs, as people snapped pictures of them at the counter, ordering a veritable feast to-go.

Then when they got their food and Eddie's hunger got to be too great for him to wait anymore, they were sped back to their hotel.

He wished his bandmates and their manager a goodnight before ducking into his room and bolting the door behind him. He took a few steps in and flipped the light switch on.

And there, sprawled out on the bed, was a different sort of feast.

The true object of Eddie's hunger: you.

You in perfectly paired, borderline scandalous lingerie, hair and makeup impeccable, staring at him with a mirroring hunger in your eyes.

"Hey rockstar," you greeted with a predatory grin. "Kept me waiting long enough."

"Wouldn't you believe it," he smirked at you and gestured to the takeout bag in his hand. "They were out of Rosemary bread."

"That's what happens when you shout your order to a crowd of your biggest fans."

"Funny I didn't see you there."

"How else would I know that you told them your sandwich order?" you teased.

"Didn't hear you either."

"I'll scream your name tonight," you batted your lashes at him. "You'll make sure of that, big boy."

Oh yeah, it was always a boost to his ego when he got you to sing for him, scream for him.

He tossed the bag onto the dresser--for later--and then closed the distance so he could devour you.

His lips went straight for your collarbone, hands exploring your curves, eager to make you squeal; meanwhile, you made quick work of his clothes. His belt was gone instantaneously with a sharp snap, your fingers made quick work of the fly of his jeans, then you reached up to shove his jacket from his shoulders.

God, he'd been fantasizing about you for years--knew your body better than he knew his thanks to countless hours wasted on the tapes from the adult section of Family Video--and it had been a surprise to see your familiar face in the pit at that very first show in Port Geneva.

Or maybe a gift from whatever god or devil was out there.

He'd sought you out after the show and it had been instant chemistry. You both couldn't stop fawning over one another, even though it might've been a little bit more awkward on your part. But you certainly weren't shy about it.

"The rockstar and the porn star," you joked as you split that infamous Number 7 at Bonnie's after your first night together. "A real power couple."

But now it was a handful of years later, and that's exactly what you were. Names forever entwined together in gossip magazines and on each others lips--not to mention the lips of every man and woman who wanted to fuck both of you, even though that likelihood was a big fat zero.

Yeah the sex was great, but it was more than that.

It was knowing one another. Caring for one another. Especially when you were both in an industry where there was little-to-none of either of those things at all.

You'd known for a while; Eddie had found out the hard way.

That's what kept him coming back to you, coming back to a small town with a venue barely-big-enough for the band's rising fame.

Because it was your home, and you were Eddie's.

Home.

It was exactly what he thought as you pushed your panties aside and he sunk into you, wet and waiting and oh-so-deliciously tight.

"Fuck," he swore against your mouth, "I missed you."

"M-missed you too," you panted right back, squirming beneath him, waiting for him to move.

Of course, Eddie was an asshole and let you wait. Let you suffer. Shit he let himself suffer, just to savor being this close with you.

He knew once he got started, he wouldn't stop until it was over.

So he'd hold out for that one last little bit, because he knew before long, he'd be leaving home behind once again.

He wasn't a man known for patience though, and before long he began to move.

He bucked into you, kissed you, squeezed you, lavished you with attention until you were one.

It was a crescendo of feelings when he got to have you like this, his lips spilling promises before he spilled himself inside you.

I missed you.

I want you.

I need you.

I love yo--

Eddie woke up with a gasp, heart racing and a wet spot growing in his boxers.

There was heavy pounding at the side door, someone slamming thier fist against it over and over again.

"Shit," he cursed. "Shit, shit, shit."

He jumped out of bed, and looked down at himself, wincing at the mixture of his embarrassment, his cum-full underwear and his rapidly-softening cock.

"Eddie, it's me," you called through the door and he froze in panic. "I know you just had a wet dream. Can you open up? It's cold out here."

How the hell did you know that?

He waddled out of his room and to the adjacent door and then let you in. You--coat thrown over your pajamas, feet in fuzzy slippers--pushed past him and headed straight for the kitchen.

"We need to talk!" You told him urgently.

"Uh," he called after you. "Can I, uh..." He gestured down at himself.

You pivoted on your heel, and then glanced from his face, down to his crotch.

Your face cycled through an array of warring emotions before it settled on bashfulness.

"Sure," you squeaked. "I'll...uh...make coffee."

Eddie locked himself in the bathroom for several minutes, listening to you bang around in the kitchen as he cleaned himself up and changed.

By the time he walked out, you were sitting at the little table, biting your nails, as two mugs sat in front of you invitingly.

"How did you know about my dream?" he asked immediately as he fell into the seat opposite you.

"Because I had one too," you said in an obvious tone.

He immediately felt his cheeks get hot, and he grabbed the steaming cup of coffee to take a sip, the scalding liquid not nearly as bad as the feelings that burned through him.

"I know...things weren't great last night," you stared once his attention was back on you, "but if shit like that's going to happen--"

"And what exactly was that?"

"That was our Writer finding their inspiration again," you explained. "Probably from one of those pesky requests. For an alternate universe. We can't exactly be...in other places. Yeah sometimes it happens, but when there's already an established world like this one...where I'm here in Hawkins...alternate universes happen in dreams."

"And are they always..." He waved his hand as he looked for the word.

"Pornographic?" The tension between you broke and two of you laughed, all worry melting instantly. "No...not always. But, uh, I guess it doesn't exactly bode well if our Writer found their inspiration for us in that AU."

Eddie swallowed hard and felt his face heat up again, for a different reason this time.

"It wasn't that bad," he muttered and you shook your head at him with a fond chuckle.

"No," you replied. "It wasn't. But, uh, I was kind of hoping you wouldn't see me naked without...I don't know, me being the one to show you."

The realization hit him too, that all of that...was all of that...was that all against both of your wills?

Sort of?

Kind of?

"It's ok," you assured him, seeing the conflict taking over his features. "I, uh...it happens a lot differently for us if either of us didn't actually want to have sex."

"Got it," he nodded, a little relieved that meant you wanted him just as much as he wanted you. But then he paused as he realized the implication...and what that meant for you in the past.

He was about to ask, to check and see if you were ok, but you quickly moved back to the original topic.

"If the Writer has found inspiration again," you began. "That means we need to be on the same page. We need to work together and support each other, because who knows what they have in store for us.

"There are a million types of stories out there. Daring adventures, fluffy romances, angsty heartbreaks. It's a bitch to deal with, honestly. We already know that this Writer wants us together, and they've already thrown wrenches into our relationship. With Steve...and Chrissy...plus the sheer unpredictability, if this dream was anything to go by...it's going to be difficult.

"So you need to be prepared," you said with a tone of finality. "We can't...you can't do what you did earlier. You've gotta keep your cool. There's no escaping this. For either of us. And you can't really fight it, but if you try to, there's definitely ways that it could make things worse for us. There's no way we can stop this until it's over. Until the story this Writer wants to tell is complete."

You reached across the table and covered Eddie's hands with your own.

"I know it's hard and I know it sucks for your world to be turned upside down," you told him gently. "But you need to hold it together. You need to listen to me, trust me. Otherwise there's no telling what might happen."

Your eyes were full of desperation, full of care, and as much as he wanted to question things--question everything--he knew now was not the time or the place.

So he assured you, without a hint of doubt or question in his voice, "I trust you."

Then he turned his hands so your fingers could twine together, and he squeezed.

"And don't worry," he smiled. "You can trust me too."

Next Chapter: Friends to Lovers Coming Soon

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[castlebyersafterdark]

I agree with you. The people who have problems with byler having sex are the younger fans. It has nothing to do with sexuality or gender. They are always calling people pedophiles for liking "their teen ship." It doesn't belong to them. I know many people have said this, but I think Will and Mike are meant to give a coming-of-age to people who never got one in the 80s. I think teens today have a hard time relating to it. Which may be part of the reason they are uncomfortable when people talk about it being groundbreaking. It's also noteworthy that no one gives a fuck when people were talking about mileven having sex at 14. A thing that was far more problematic for a lot of reasons. But byler having sex when they are older and emotionally mature is an issue for people. Adults tend to be more mature about sex. But this fandom in particular has been crazy to witness. The younger fans don't really get how to act in a fandom in general. They get upset if people have crack ships or do anything that isn't strictly canon. They get upset if someone has a theory that goes against what they like. They get upset if anyone actually has a background in a topic and knows more than them (i.e. there used to be a lot of people here who studied film and talked about that. At least up until a lot of younger people got upset they were proving their theories wrong. Then they got attacked for it.)

Being freaked out by sex falls in line with the rest of their behavior. Which is odd considering how many porn bots Tumblr has. You'd think they'd be more comfortable with it. But the people who are discussing spicy byler stuff are doing totally normal fandom things and I personally haven't witnessed anyone being creepy about this. So the outrage is (what a shock) out of proportion to the discussion that people are having about it. I think with this fandom in particular, there may have been more gay men in it at one point, but so many people have left now due to the hostility. I know Will means a lot to them so it's a shame if this is true. But I've seen a lot of homophobia coming from young people as well. Especially directed at Noah. It's possible they just left because they didn't want to listen to it anymore. I also thought it was funny and really odd that that one ask specifically mentioned lesbians being uncomfortable with byler having sex. WHY? No one is forcing them to have sex with a man if they watch it! It won't make them straight. People tend to like sex in general regardless of their own orientation. I'm sure there are lesbians around here who support the ship and the rep it brings and want it to be a good story too.

I don't have much more to add but this is a very good read on the current fandom culture in general!!

My hope moving forward is that well-adjusted and mature, level-headed fans just trying to have a good time exploring all a fandom/ship offers can find their people and seek out these little circles until the greater fandom changes as time moves forward, don't engage with contentious people who are probably teens ill-equipped to handle the world outside their own perspective yet, and keep speaking up against any hatred. Wish I'd done that in the past but, well. Here I am now. Continuously crossing my fingers for change on the horizon 🤞🤞🤞

[lovesickeros]

do you have any Rosaria headcanons?

I have sporadic headcannons for like. everyone in this game I think abt it maybe a little. think abt it occasionally. just gonna do generalized hcs here since you didn't specify if you wanted smth like yan/sagau or anything 🧍

cryo characters are my fave to write about bc. looks at tsaritsa. no reason in particular :]

kind of wish hoyo went more in depth with visions. stolen authority of the dragon sovereigns given to the common people and there's no side effects it's just a buff? nah. delusions kind of fill that role but I like to think having a vision still changes you in some manner (kind of like how I imagine the archons still retain certain inhuman characteristics even after losing their gnosis. you don't get that kind of power for free)

for cryo users the obvious thing is very cold body temp. which, to me, is why rosaria is so pale. she's practically bordering on getting frostbite and since she doesn't really interact with people, well, it can be a boon when she "works" at night.

if things had been different, she probably wouldn't have been so frigid. someone like Kaeya, even though he got his vision during his fight with Diluc, still had his brother to even him out alongside the rest of the knights (Jean, Lisa, Amber etc). For me, at least, his vision less affected body temp anyway and just generally numbed some of his senses. namely touch & taste. he's been trying to get Rosaria out more but their both cryo so, well..he can't help much. their absolutely besties though. even outside of drinking and needling Diluc.

she smokes a lot because it's as close to warmth as she can get without burning. she's sensitive to heat, even more so then other cryo users. you'd think her being so cold would offer protection against it, but..nah. absolutely dreads hot summers. it's a nightmare for her.

she's generally just very standoffish but she is practical. not aimed at a specific au here but if you manage to get close to her despite her prickly and relatively cold attitude shes actually very protective. she doesn't get close to a lot of people so the few people she is close to she goes out of her way to make sure no one tries anything with them. though most of her help is behind the scenes - you won't really know it's her unless you somehow figure it out. she's sneaky and works at night, which gives her ample opportunity to sort things out. someone giving you trouble? they apologize the next morning seemingly out of nowhere. forgot or lost something? suddenly find it somewhere in plain view in your house.

shes not exactly thrilled about direct praise and thanks. it makes her feel out of place and awkward. if you do realize what she's doing, it's best not to openly bring it up. just taking her out for drinks or something is enough, but she doesn't care if you do nothing either way.

it's like befriending a feral cat.

she's not exactly fond about touching, either. for both of your sakes. shes COLD as I mentioned earlier and I do mean very cold. she'll stick to admiring from a distance. your too good for her anyway. practically the sun in comparison - she'd melt before she even got close.

she'll protect you and you'll be happy and that's all she would ever need. she's fine watching from a distance because she's gotten accustomed to the dark and cold.

[milkweedman]

hello! i bought my first ever fleece today and i was wondering if you have any good resources on how to process it? its a jacobs sheep if that factors into anything :-)

Hey congrats on your first fleece ! I don't have a ton of resources to point you towards unfortunately--in terms of fleece prep I'm entirely self taught. The good news is its pretty intuitive and the hard part is mostly getting the tools and having the time to actually do it. I'm happy to walk you through my usual process, which hopefully should help :)

Step 1: assess your fleece. This is an important step. Try to lay out your fleece--some will be rolled neatly and some will be a jumble--and start looking at it. Does it need to be washed ? Even fleeces that are sold as already washed still need another round if they are greasy, brittle, or sticky to the touch, or have lots of dirt, dust, dung, etc. Check your fleece over and determine if it needs to be washed, and start skirting it if necessary; skirting is pulling out the grossest bits--anything covered in dung tags, shot through with vegetable matter, or otherwise way too messy to be processed as is. This can be cleaned later and with special attention to removing all the muck, if you want to.

Step 2: wash your fleece, if necessary. This is grabbed from my comprehensive guide to drop spindling, near the end:

"To wash a fleece, you need a dedicated wool pot (as in, don’t cook in it again), a bit of dish soap, and some time. Put the fleece in--don’t crowd it, just work in batches if your pot can’t easily fit all of the fleece--add cold water and a squirt of dish soap, and let it cook on the stove for about 45 minutes, without a lid. Don’t let it boil--ideally it should be steaming but not quite simmering. You can use a dedicated wool spoon/tongs to gently and infrequently stir the wool. The water should get pretty gross. After 45 minutes, start the tap running (you need to rinse the wool in very hot water--if you let temperature shock happen, it could felt), drain the water, and rinse the fleece. Then repeat--filling up the pot with hot water now--until the water stops looking dirty at the end of the 45 minute cooking time. Rinse it one more time, and then let your wool dry, ideally on a clothesline but over a vent/spread out flat on a towel is fine too.

Yes, it really is that easy. If you’re worried about felting or otherwise ruining the entire fleece, you can always start by washing just a handful, so that way if you ruin it there’s not much waste. But I’ve washed at least a couple dozen fleeces that exact way, and I’ve never ruined one."

Step 3: grading or equalizing. Once it's cleaned and dry, this is a good time to grade your fleece--that is, separate it into the really nice soft wool, the medium wool, the coarser wool, etc. Just work slowly and methodically, and keep an eye out particularly for differences in crimp in the fleece--your finest bits of wool will be much crimpier and typically have shorter locks, whereas your coarse wool will have less crimp than the rest, and is often longer than the rest of the fleece. But if in doubt, just trust your hands and grade by softness.

You may also wish to separate the different colors--Jacob in particular, being a piebald breed, should be sorted by color unless you want a fully random marled effected in your finished yarn. With Jacob I usually sort into black, white, and gray/mixed (for when the color changes mid-lock, or is already somewhat jumbled up), although the specific colors depend of course on your particular fleece.

If you'd rather process the entire fleece into a single batch of yarn, and don't want noticeable grades in your yarn, you will want to equalize your fleece--that is, separate any pieces that are already tearing and make sure the different grades are well distributed in your wool basket. If you plan to comb your wool you'll likely want to avoid doing anything that destroys any lock structure or makes the fleece particularly messy--combing is quickest and most effective if youve got clean locks to start with--but if processing using any other method, feel free to go crazy tearing your wool into handfuls. It's important to note that even if you skip this step, it's unlikely that you'll end up with super noticeable differences inbetween sections of yarn (though it depends on the fleece and how not-equalized it is). But this step doesn't take long and prevents any coarse areas in your finished piece. I would still recommend sorting by color even if you intend to equalize the grades of wool.

Step 3: picking your tools. So, fiber prep tools are expensive, and most people don't have all of them.

Back when I only had hand cards, everything was processed on hand cards. If it was particularly VM-y, I used the No Fleece Left Behind (NFLB) method to individually clean the locks before carding them into rolags. It wasnt ideal for every fleece, but it did work. So, always use what you have.

But here's the possible options (I may be missing a few really esoteric ones like bowing, sorry), and what they do:

~~~Hand Carding: This produces rolags--fluffy rolls of wool that are a woolen prep and will want to turn into a woolen yarn. Hand cards are very fast and versatile--they can handle any staple length under 5 or 6 inches (15 cm) but past that they don't work very well. They also don't usually remove much vm, grit, second cuts, nepps, noils, etc. So if your fleece is very gross, hand cards won't clean it very much, unless you do the NFLB method.

~~~Hand Combing: This can be done on actual hand combs or on palm combs (literally just a cheap plastic hair comb--I have made a tutorial for how to process fiber on a palm comb here). Hand combing is usually much slower than hand carding, which is important to take into account. It also produces a very different prep--hand combed top--which spins into a worsted yarn. It is much more effective at removing vm and whatever else--this is the only way I clean gross fleeces now. It also works particularly well with longer stapled fleeces, but can be used on a fleece of any staple length (just with diminishing returns the shorter it gets).

~~~Flick Carding: These are the cheapest standard fleece prep tool--just a handle with a small tined cloth at the end, for flicking open single locks (or small handfuls of locks). This is a pretty effective way to remove VM and open up the fleece, and results in combed locks. However, combed locks can be tricky to spin evenly--I certainly always process them further into rolags or top--but it's absolutely doable. The speed of flick carding depends heavily on the individual fleece; particularly the amount of VM/second cuts/other debris and the strength of the structure of the lock.

~~~Drum Carding: I'm not speaking from experience here--if anyone who processes fleece on a drum carder wants to chime in, please feel free--but from what I've read this is a very fast method for processing fleece. In most cases you will want to open up the locks a little, and perhaps align them. You'll then feed them through the carder (multiple times, resulting in a more even prep each time) until you have a uniform batt. From there you can pull it into roving or spin strips off the batt. One additional advantage to drum carding is that because it processes much more fleece per batch than any of the methods above, it will also equalize the grades of your fleece--that way, you will have fewer coarse spots.

~~~Willowing: This is a very old and low tech way to open up a fleece and remove VM. I just tried it for this ask, and can confirm that it's pretty good at both of those, and also at least mildly amusing, if not outright fun. (Here's a short video I made demonstrating it, if you want to see !) You lay down a sheet or towel and put your fleece on it. Most fleeces will probably benefit from you pulling it apart with your hands somewhat, and breaking it into small chunks before starting. Then, using one or two willow sticks (or other bendy sticks), hit the wool repeatedly and quickly. This will cause it to fly up in the air, so you need to gather it back up every minute or so. This results in a bundle of fibers that are open and much cleaner, but not at all organized--so not really spinnable. You could refine it by hand picking or layer it and load it onto a distaff. Your next step in processing will determine whether you get a more woolen or worsted yarn--but as it is without further processing, willowing lends itself to irregular woolen yarns. That said, it does also equalize the grades of your fleece, if by no other method than jumbling it all up.

~~~Hand Picking: The no tools approach. This is a pretty good written guide to hand picking. Just open the locks sideways, pick the VM out by hand or manipulate the lock so that it falls out. Make sure to disrupt and smooth out any lock structure for a neater result. This too benefits from an additional step of processing afterwards--even if it's still by hand. I prefer to pull the wool in between my hands until I have a fistful of wool all facing the same general direction, then pre-draft it into a sliver. The pre-drafting cuts down a lot on irregularities, since you encounter those before you start spinning.

Step 4: processing the fiber. As discussed above, there's lots of different methods to process a fleece, and if you have a choice between a few of them, it's good to consider the following two points: 1) how time consuming each method is 2) the preparation that each method results in and how this will work with your fleece. With Jacob fleeces in particular, pretty much any method will result in a usable and attractive yarn, but only a few of them will remove the second cuts that seem endemic to Jacob fleeces (combing and maybe hand picking, if you're attentive), so other methods will result in a lumpy--albeit charming, in my opinion--yarn. Of course you can also pull second cuts off as you see them come up in hand cards or whatever else--but you'll never see all of them, and it's very slow work.

Whatever your method, have fun with it ! If it feels like a slow slog, try breaking it up into shorter sessions (I typically only comb wool for an hour or two at most, and usually under an hour when carding), or doing it with friends. Fleece processing by hand is slow work, much slower than spinning, but also requires a lot less attention than spinning does, so if you can't spin while reading or watching a movie, you may still be able to process fleece.

One thing to keep in mind is that it's also very messy--depending on how much VM is in your fleece, you may want to do it outside to avoid having to clean up your area later. Usually a woven blanket that's smooth and easy to clean is good enough though--just drape it over your lap, and whenever it gets covered in VM, go shake it off outside or into the trash. I would not recommend preparing fleece on your bed or any furniture that's hard to clean. I speak from experience here.

I also highly recommend The Fleece & Fiber Sourcebook (your library may have a copy--if not you can request that they buy one), it's a really good resource to have for anyone who works with fleeces. It has pictures of samples, info on many different breeds of sheep and other fiber animals, and tips on how to process or spin each breed. It's also just a great catalogue for finding what breeds I want to spin next.

Lastly, a few notes about what you can do with fleece that you can't do with already prepared wool.

From multicolored fleeces you can get different colors of yarn without needing to dye anything--great for colorwork, or adding details or edging. In this case it's important to sort your wool by color. Failure to sort a multicolored fleece by color can lead to yarns that all look pretty different from each other, and that don't work together particularly well.

You can also dye in the wool (e.g. dye as fleece) and get several different levels of saturation from one dyejob. This happens naturally without you needing to do anything--different parts of the fleece will accept dye in slightly different amounts, so you end up with a decent range of saturations. You can of course also dye one fleece many different colors with small batch dyeing, and mix them to expand your palette even further.

You can dip or kettle dye either the fleece or picked locks from the fleece, which leads to some great colors as well.

Hope this was helpful ! If you're trying out some new tools for the first time I'd recommend hitting up youtube for demonstrations, and remember that if one method doesn't work, just keep looking. Have fun with your Jacob fleece--they're a great starter breed but also just so fun because of the piebald aspect. One of my favorite breeds for sure.

[hyba]

Alpha Readers for Murder in Heliopolis!

Hello, everyone!

So, as you may already know, Murder in Heliopolis, my solarpunk thriller/murder mystery, is going to be my main project for 2024. I already know that there are a few edits that will need to be done, but I'd also like to have a round of alpha readers take a look at it and let me know their thoughts so I can maybe keep in mind other things I hadn't previously considered.

In particular, I want to know a little more about:

Characters: Which characters you liked/disliked, which characters you felt were underdeveloped, which characters/decisions made sense and which didn't, etc.

Settings: Descriptions that were good/bad, settings that felt interesting/boring, settings you wished you got to learn a little more about, etc.

Plot: Pacing and progression - did it feel good, slow, too fast, or inconsistent? (Disregard the ending; I know that was a bit abrupt and it will be one of the first elements I'll be changing.)

Anything else that sticks out to you - things you liked/disliked, for example, or things that didn't make sense to you at all.

Since this is pre-edit, and since the whole draft is published on Royal Road, I'm not going to be doing a sign-up sheet, and I'm keeping the process a bit loose. What I'm doing instead is I'll be adding Qs for alpha readers at the end of each chapter, in hopes that my alpha readers can either comment on each chapter or send me their feedback in a private message on RR.

(If you don't want to make an RR account, we can find another way - commenting on a specific post on my blog, reblogging a post here on tumblr with your notes, something along those lines?)

As I get a new draft done, I'll set up a call for beta readers, and that one will be a little more organized, with sign-up sheets and all that good stuff. Alpha readers will get priority.

If that sounds like something you'd be willing to do, check out Murder in Heliopolis and please let me know your thoughts!

[sequoiareachesforthesky]

Various observations on Hotaru from the hit project by @tsumigram and what I get out of them

Warning : this post is a mess. You may feel like some obvious stuff is missing. You'd be right.

In this post, I'm going to list various observations I made based on citations. Then, I'll be trying to link these observations together within a small, more cohesive analysis (don't expect very in-depth analysis or theorizing, I'm not very good at it).

Here goes part 1 (citations, and then what i get out of them, specifically the highlited parts)

“I don't feel particularly averse to this place… rather, I can't say I really care. I can't remember any distinct preferences of mine.” - Character profile

“I'm fine with anything” - Timeline convo 07/12/23, talking with Remi about the name she should give them

“Chise : Are you a boy or a girl? I asked Ego, but she said it's not written on your prisoner card. Hotaru : Ahh, I mean, you can decide.” - Timeline convo 13/12/23

“Next year. I need to move out of this house. Who was the one wishing for it?” - Memory Report, Record n°3

-> Hotaru has, according to them, no preferences/tastes, no real personal identity, no sense of self. [1]

“It’s enough of a crime that I’m here. Right into Hell, I’ll take you with me” - Undercover

“The things that I like are getting on my nerves. Everyone thinks they're weird, so I can't stand them. Is it? Is it? As I see it, I'm the same as other people. I don't get what do I have to change.” -Memory report, Record n°3

-> As Hotaru sees it, there's something wrong at the core of their identity (your very existence is a crime ; what you like is wrong) [2]

“Ego-chan is really easy to talk to. I don't know what your real intentions are, but it makes me feel that you want to understand me. So, thank you.” - Character profile

-> Hotaru wants to be understood [3]

“Hm-m. Rather than judgment of sins, as you say, it sounds like an assignment of a role.” - Character profile

“You feel burning cold beneath your body; it starts to spread from your unmoving fingers, going further and further until becoming unbearable. You’re trying to wake up, you’re trying, desperately opening your eyes only to be pushed forward the next moment — right into the blurry air.” - Undercover

“In fact, Remi-chan named me Hotaru.” - Voice drama

“Another life that you'll give me.” - Voice drama

-> Hotaru is often the object of the action in matters that concerns them personally (objectification). Their agency is constantly being taken away, they are forced into things/roles they didn't choose. [4]

“Hotaru: Ahh— May I call you Ego-chan? I don't intend to disrespect your position as the warden, but I prefer to remember people's names.”

“Hotaru: I'm really doing my best to be respectful to people’s names. Because names hold a lot of meaning.”

“See you later, young lady. Or do you hate being called that? Not in particular. I see. I'm respectful, so I wouldn't refer to you in any way that you hate.”

“I changed my name in papers, but everyone keeps on calling me by the old one. This is so cruel”

-> Hotaru gives a lot of importance to respecting people's names and not referring to someone in a way they don't like. They give a value to what people choose to be called. [5]

(note : there's so much more to say about Hotaru and "names", they even explain in details what names mean to them in their voice drama, but this part is only about the intersection between the theme of "names" an the theme of "choice")

“Aren't you too old for being a school bully?” - Timeline cconvo 22/12/23

“Those girls pick on you.” - Memory Report, Record n°2

-> Bullying appears to be a core theme of Hatoru's story. In both of these instances, they are accusing others (girls) of being bullies. [6]

“Hotaru: It makes me feel a bit left out. Ego: Why so? Do others pick on you? Hotaru: Ahh— May I call you Ego-chan? I don't intend to disrespect your position as the warden, but I prefer to remember people's names. Ego: That's a sudden change of topic.” - Voice drama

-> Here, when Ego brings up bullying and ask Hotaru if they are being bullied, Hotaru avoids the topic. [7]

“Sorry, I can't really remember my name nor age. I know it's inconvenient, so if I come up with a way to refer to myself, I'll make sure to tell you first.” - Character profile

“Ego: Ahh, I suppose. …This is my first interrogation ever, so it might have been a little awkward… Hotaru: It's fine. Rather, I must be giving you more trouble since I barely can give information about myself.” - Voice Drama

“Ego: Jacka told me about your situation, so I won't ask you for a self-introduction. Hotaru: Sorry for the trouble.” - Voice drama

“Ego: That's a sudden change of topic. Hotaru: Sorry for that.” - Voice drama

“Uh… As for why I feel left out… I might get a bit talkative here. Do you mind?” - Voice drama

“I might be too dramatic, so don't overthink it.” - Voice drama

“There's no need to. I might go with another one later. You're going to get tired of making new prisoner tags each time, so it's better to leave a blank space.”

“Next year I'll do it. This is the worst, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.” - Memory report, record n°3

-> Hotaru apologizes a lot (x) and overall seems to be worried about being bothersome to people around them (x). They want to avoid annoying others at all cost. [8]

“Maybe… the reason why I forgot my name is that no one cared to remember it.” - Voice drama

“It’s uncomfortable to be remembered, right? I know your faculty, too.” - Memory report, record n°2

-> Being remembered is something ambivalent in Hotaru's story : it's important, valuable, yet it can cause you to be stuck in the past against your will by being associated with things that aren't related to you anymore (there's a loooot to say about Hotaru and "remembering", it's the amnesia man we're talking about after all) [9]

“Compared to everyone, it's like I don't really have a life. Either I'm dead already, or wasn't born yet.” - Voice drama

“Another life that you'll give me.” - Voice drama

-> Themes of birth/rebirth [10]

“It’s enough of a crime that I’m here. Right into Hell, I’ll take you with me” - Undercover

“Well, maybe you'll go to Hell and pay for it. Not that Hell exists.” - Memory report, record n°2

=> There's a couple of mentions of Hell in Hotaru's story, and with religious undertones since it's Hell with a capital H. [11]

Ok, now, my broad analysis (I don't think I'm very good at those so here goes nothing ig) :

Hotaru doesn't feel like they have their own identity (1), because they can't remember anything about themselves. Their life is a complete blur (as we are often reminded by pretty much every piece of content about them). Despite that, they also seek to be understood (3). There's a kind of contradiction in this: if they have nothing for themself, what is there to understand? As I see it, this desire to be understood is a remnant of their past life. Maybe there's nothing to understand anymore, but the effort is always valued and appreciated. They may also see it as a way to help them find their own identity : if others figure out things about them, they could start understanding themself better.

This importance that Hotaru gives to trying to understand others may result from the fact that others have never tried to understand them in the past. This can link to points [2] and [6] : people has made Hotaru feel as if there was something wrong with them without trying to go past that first impression and it turned into bullying. I think Hotaru has been bullied in the past, and that might be why they avoid the topic when Ego asks them if they are getting picked on (7), because it feels too personal, too close to home, even if they currently have no memory of it (avoidance as a coping mechanism).

in addition to the bullying, there's the fact that Hotaru may have lacked control over their life and choices as a whole (4). The way Hotaru has been treated by others could be the cause of their current behaviour : Hotaru apologizes a lot and doesn't want to bother others (8), which couls be because of low self-worth induced by the way others have treated them.

Because they know what it feels like for your choice not to be respected, Hotaru has developed a strong attachment to the importance of respecting other people's choices (5).

Now I haven't mentioned it because it's quite obvious, but Hotaru's story relates a lot to identity, and also gender. If we assume the person talking in the Memory report, record n°3, they changed name but others kept dead-naming them. It could technically be because of reasons that don't relate to gender identity, but I think we can assume it is as the topic of gender is also part of Hotaru's story and character (they use any pronous, according to them they don't care about being seen as either a boy or a girl, the Memory report record n°2 mentions specifically whether or not calling someone "young lady", etc.) Also the theme of "being reborn as a new person" (10) tracks with the idea of transitioning. Assuming Hotaru is some flavour of transgender, it's likely that this part of their identity was one of the target of their bully/bullies. Probably not the only one (cf citations in point [2]), and bullies will attack anything they can find in you anyway, but it shows how transgender youths are at a higher risk of not being accepted by their peers.

Very vague hypothesis about Hotaru's crime : The way Hotaru has been treated may have led them to seek vengence and kill someone, which could be the reason why they're here in Tsumigram. Aside from that, I don't know, there's mentions of taking someone in death with them ("Not that Hell exist. Does it? We'll see."  "Right into Hell, I’ll take you with me") but I don't have enough analysis skills to get anything beyond that. Could've killed someone (or multiple people) with the intetion of killing themselves right after but didn't go through it in the end.

Anyway this post is kind of a mess, I didn't even really touch on the topic of memory, amnesia and stuff and barely mentioned the religious undertones but I just thought I'd do. something. This is more of an exercise for me on how to articulate my thoughts.

[greatwesternway]

Traintober 1: Free Day - Duck and Diesel and Oliver and Sonny

It's a lazy Sunday so have an Engines in Sidings alternative events chat about a scene I don't plan to write for Traintober Day 1.

DJ: I was also lookin' at my Sonny chapter for Engines in Sidings and thinkin' about that point at which Duck and Diesel finally are forced to talk.

Ray: I saw that at the top of my list when I was looking at the list of docs on my phone the other day so I was wondering if you were fucking with it, lol.

DJ: And I don't think I'm gonna actually put this in because I think it's a better story if Duck never knows about how Diesel came to get bought. But supposing he asked, because he would have been curious. Diesel would tell him that Hatt thinks he let a steam engine escape his old yard. And of course Duck asks if he did, because he's hip to Diesel's evasive bullshit by now. To which Diesel would just rattle off the line again. "It was dark and we're all painted black." Which tells Duck nothing conclusive but is a very strange way to put it. And he rather thinks Diesel would outright deny it if it he hadn't. So Duck guesses at it. "So… yes?"

Which Diesel finds annoying, but at the same time, he'd not have thought Duck would even entertain the thought that he would have helped a steam engine. So he huffily elaborates. "I didn't help him escape. I just didn't stop him either." Which Duck has nothing to say to that, but he thinks quite a lot.

Tells Oliver about it later, wants to know what he thinks of that. And this is after Sonny has explained to the two of them that diesels helping him is how he made it to Sodor at all. If Diesel is telling the truth, Oliver thinks that's more than you could rightly expect of a diesel back then. Doesn't think they should be super friendly with Diesel about it or anything. Just that, assuming it's true, it's surprising.

Ray: Oliver doesn't hate Diesel the way Duck does, because he wasn't there, but he knows enough to know how Duck feels about the situation and after hearing only Duck's side of it for so long, I think he'd be a little surprised to hear this about him.

DJ: No, and Duck is a smidge annoyed because he was hoping Oliver - with his history with diesels - would validate his wish to be more uncharitable with this story. But if Oliver - and apparently Hatt - is willing to entertain it, then maybe Duck should too. Which is so funny because you'd think yourself a fool to do that otherwise.

Ray: Oliver doesn't hate diesels in specific, he's just… wary, I think. He knows he's safe on Sodor, but Duck doesn't have that kind of history with the island and also never had to run for his life. From an outside perspective, you'd assume Oliver would take his side, but it's not that simple. Oliver also has more experience with diesels in general, I think he'd know that their behavior in Diesel's story checks out.

DJ: It's because Sonny tells him about the diesels at the power plants who found coal for him. Oliver's escape would have been so much easier if diesels had been like that in his day instead of actively hunting for him. But knowing that they are apparently like that now, and this scrappy little steam engine made it all the way here after years of steam being abolished… Oliver has to imagine that diesels didn't just decide to be helpful one day.

Ray: Oliver putting 2 and 2 together to get 4 and Duck like "I'm not doing that math. I simply won't."

DJ: Will. Not! Which, to be fair to Duck, that math actually doesn't check out for Diesel in particular. That Diesel's story is as it is, that's all just happenstance. If there was some gradual change in the wind re: diesel aggression, Diesel himself was not actually a part of it.

Also, it's kinda nice for Diesel to get to say this, because he always has to spin this story for the audience, but Duck is sort of special in that Diesel assumes Duck will take whatever he says in bad faith anyway so it doesn't matter if he actually tells the story as it really happened. But it is very strange that Duck is the one party he's ever been able to tell the story straight to as well.

Ray: Lifts the burden of having to make yourself look good when you know the other party won't buy any of it. It's frank, no bullshit. Which Duck does not associate with Diesel at all.

It's a shame we can't use this because I really want to. Nobody fucking writes Oliver and Duck stuff.

DJ: Well, part of why I think I shouldn't actually go this way is because I think it takes away from Duck and Diesel just coming to an understanding in the contained sense. The overall story isn't actually about them coming to terms, but Sonny learning that not everyone has to be friendly as long as they're getting their work done. And also because functionally, this'd not be as detailed a conversation between them as all this, because they are dumbass trains.

Ray: Yeah, I know. Just mad is all.

DJ: But I told you this so that you could enjoy it, even if others will not.

Ray: I am enjoying it! :D Love our OC Oliver.

DJ: God, Sonny trying to get Diesel a second chance with Duck because he's the Second Chance engine, not realizing Diesel's actually on his fourth. And Diesel not wanting to tell him because this friendship is precarious enough as it is.

Ray: Sonny wouldn't mind. It's his Second Chance with him, which is what's important. Sonny isn't the arbiter of morals, he's only counting what he was here for.

DJ: Yeah, but Diesel doesn't know that. And also if Sonny annoys Duck enough to make him complain, it won't matter what chance he's on with Sonny. At least to Diesel's thinking. And Diesel thinks his place is also precarious.

Ray: lol

DJ: Very funny how Hatt is the villain in all these stories.

Ray: Hatt would be over the fucking moon to hear his engines are trying to work things out between them like fucking adults.

DJ: He'd be very interested and intrigued to hear that Duck and Diesel are doing anything more than avoiding each other. Not that he minds them doing that now, but it'd be interesting to hear otherwise. And if he found out the details of why, that Diesel was trying to keep Sonny out of trouble, he'd be very proud.

Ray: He loves these machines so much in his way.

DJ: I honestly love that when he comes upon the scene with Sonny and Diesel, he fuckin' bullshits them about the fish first.

Ray: It's so… Old Hatt 🥁

DJ: Like, you KNOW he saw Diesel off the tracks, Sonny haulin' him back with the chain. And it's Diesel so you also know some bullshit is a-fkn-foot here. So let's just ask about the fish first and foremost. See what these hooligans have to say for themselves.

But it would just come back around to what he says at the end of the scene. If there's one thing more important than being really Useful, it's taking care of your fellow engines. And here Diesel is, doing it. Even going so far as to try and smooth things over with Duck.

Hatt maybe didn't think he was making a good investment in buying Diesel on the basis of heresay, but he at least thought he was making an interesting one. And look, it's paid off. Even if he's the villain in the fucking story again for reasons he can never fathom. Hasn't scrapped an engine in years, nor ever sent one away and fucking yet. Dumbass trains.

What's also hilarious is Hatt probably thought to hisself "Oh no, not these two together" when he came upon that scene. Because he didn't arrange for Sonny and Diesel to end up hanging out. But it's actually been so good for both of them. Amazing. Even Hatt would never have thought.

Ray: No. I think I said it before that, if given the choice, he'd have liked to have kept them apart. But engines will literally never stop surprising him. It's why he likes them so much.

DJ: Hatt loves engine bullshit.

Ray: "Hobbits really are amazing creatures. You can learn all there is to know about their ways in a month and yet after a hundred years they can still surprise you." -Gandalf, but also replace "hobbits" with "engines" and it's Hatt.

DJ: Duck would probably also be a little proud of him despite himself. That's some Great Western activities right there. Oliver fuckin' ribbin' him about it. Imagine you try to teach this tin pot railway your Ways and this fucking guy ends up demonstrating them so astutely. Rood.

Ray: He'd be proud but he'd immediately cover it up with "Well, he didn't know that. Sir Topham Hatt told him because he's very wise and knows Our Ways. Diesel just happened to be doing what was expected of him. Unusual, but nothing to write home about."

DJ: I don't think he'd play it off. Duck's not the sort to not acknowledge when he's wrong or when he's been surprised. But he'd probably not say so much about it, which is why Oliver's poking him about it. More like Oliver's slyly commenting on how GWR this whole thing with Diesel has been, and Duck being like, "Well, I suppose even he could learn after a century."

Ray: "And Sonny, picking it up so quickly!"

DJ: Sonny's a natural. He's a fuckin' gangster too.

[lucem-stellarum]

@t4llhum4n your tags made me want to expand on a thought I had. It was initially just a throwaway line but then I started thinking. It's not Vega centric, but still your fault :) also tysm I love sharing theories <3

For everyone else, the post in question is this one and these are the tags:

(Photo ID: #I stg this is so cool i legit have never thought about them this way #and Vincent being compared to MARCUS?! #and it WORKING?? #immaculate /end ID)

Under the cut due to length and discussion of canon violations of consent, of the Marcus and Adam variation.

Yeah, Vincent and Marcus. You'd think that Vincent and Adam are supposed to be mirrors of each other, and that's not WRONG, but when talking about specifically attraction and consent, which Mr. Redacted has explicitly said is a very important concept for him, I think there are different fits worth discussing.

To recap: Vincent and Marcus are foils of each other because of their idolization of their respective listeners. Lovely, especially in the first couple of videos, is particularly passive (which changes once Adam kidnaps them and they unleash their powers. I think it boils down to that literally being the first videos Mr. Redacted posts and having to figure out the particular balance between an ASMR listener and an audiobook character. Not that there's anything wrong with that! I couldn't do it. But it is something he's improved on since then). The Android is also one of the more passive characters to start with; this makes sense, especially early on while they were still being built and coded, their personality was literally a "work in progress" under Marcus' direction. Vincent and Marcus both are instantly and deeply enamored with the object of their affection. Vincent uses his charms, mysterious vampire nature, and flirty personality to entice Lovely and gain their interest. Marcus is sweet, caring, even nurturing, and tips the scales with the obsession code. But while both of their interest is reciprocated, it is Marcus' that is forced; it would be analagous to if Vincent were to use a trance to force Lovely to consent and accept his "love". While Vincent bites Lovely when he loses control (which, as per classic vampire stories, thematically is a blatant metaphor for sex), he very importantly waits for their true consent- without trancing them. Due to the obsession code overriding their system, the android at no point is able to give true, uncoerced consent during any of their interactions. They're both narratively confronted by their actions and treatment of their listener. Vincent has his moment of realization after Adam kidnaps Lovely and they get their power that he was (paraphrasing) "treating them like a toy; something to flirt with and tease and use for blood" and that he doesn't like that he's fallen into that pattern of behavior. He apologizes and promises to do better, and he does. Marcus, on the other hand, gets confronted by James about his actions and... well. His apology really doesn't amount to much, does it? Not with how selfishly and thoroughly he took advantage of his power over the Android and ignored any semblance of boundaries they might have had.

But what about Adam? Adam trances Lovely and takes advantage of them, and then gets what's coming to him almost immediately. Yes, that is one correct interpretation of his character in relation to Vincent. But, Adam never cared about Lovely as a person. He never wanted their affection or attention, it didn't matter if they hated him. He wanted Lovely to hate him, to acknowledge and submit to the sadistic power he held over them. All Adam cared about was their blood, their body, and didn't care what he had to do to get both. Lovely wasn't a person, they were a toy, a cash cow, "rare type of cattle that liked it", a pet he could keep and use and take advantage of as he wished. His character and narrative foil is someone... different. To use a different phrase, Adam is hedonistic. He cares about pleasure, his wants, and indulgences. To contrast this, we'd need a character who enjoys the same physical pleasures of the flesh but who values the consent of their partner. Someone who likes to take control but respects the other person's desires and boundaries. Someone like Gavin.

Makes sense when it's put that way, doesn't it? And Gavin is certainly rewarded for valuing and prioritizing consent with his partner. Taking care of them, and being taken care of in return. The relationship between Gavin and Freelancer starts out as pretty...physical and sensual, same as Adam's instant attraction, but that undercurrent of mutual respect morphed into true affection and love. Adam never respected Lovely, and used trancing as a way to disregard their boundaries. Gavin does make a few (a lot) of passes at Freelancer, but if a Sadism demon can use a spark of magic to encourage the worst in people to get larger energy returns (per Caelum) and Serenity demons can calm their charges, then why wouldn't an Incubus be able to do something similar? Plus, demons are so much more magically powerful than humans and it's never specifically said that vampires are the only ones able to cause a trance, just that's one of the few types of magic that they're really good at. Gavin is a strong demon and good at a lot of different types of magic; enough that he's basically just a formality away from full certification. He has the power to forcibly take away Freelancer's consent if he was so inclined, but he chooses not to; he wants the enthusiastic consent of his partners. If you accept a diversion into the Imperium verse, Vindemiator's valuation of consent is consistent across both verses because it's so centrally important to who he is, and one reason why he hates Kody so much (in both universes). Furthermore, vampires are the Sovereign's failed attempts at recreating Incubi among humans; as magical races, they're more closely linked than would immediately be apparent. If anyone would be able to also do a trance, it would be an incubus. So, Adam is the narrative selfish foil to Gavin's respectful hedonism.

So... thoughts? Does this make sense, or am I just talking out of my ass? The parallels are there, but are they narratively the most appropriate comparison, or would there be another one you think would work better? Thank you for sparking this in my brain, I wouldn't have gotten the motivation for this without you!

[purple-steven]

Personality swap! But specifically directed at Ender. Make him the exact opposite of how he is now, more nice and caring and less bitter and cruel. Just for a day or two of course, but it'll be a nice change of pace for Lav.

- Mystery anon

//doing something similar but quite different

Honestly, he's been far more reclusive than usual. No one seems to have really noticed, seeing as it's not... unusual for him to suddenly hole up. But Ender's been worse recently. A bit more harsh. Maybe it was the silence that made everything seem calmer, but it seemed as though Ender's silence made his presence that much prevalent.

And it was more disturbing that Lav didn't really entirely process the fact that Ender HAD disappeared. The thoughts didn't go with him. That just meant that... well, he's probably going to have these thoughts even when Ender's gone. Which is a horrible thing to know.

So here he is. Rotting in bed. Listening to Ender whisper in his ear for the billionth time. You'd think he'd eventually realise that this whole thing is just for him to react. That maybe, Lav would just... stop listening.

But it's really, really hard to when that's just how you think as well. All he could really do was just sorta lay there and listen.

...but then there was a shift. It stopped. Just for a moment. And a soft, gentle voice came out.

Oh, uhm, hello Lav!

...huh. Wh... this is new.

Lav held genuine surprise towards this new voice. Although it sounded familiar, it was one he didn't hear that regularly. Or... nearly at all, to be perfectly honest.

I do apologise, I haven't really been the greatest help to you at all... But! Uh! This curse- uh- it should fix things! For a bit, at least. Just for a little while.

...hang on, hang on, what's- what's going on?

Ah, right, I'm Del. Someone tried to make Ender the exact opposite of how he is. And... well, being his direct counterpart makes that fairly simple!

...ah.

I know, uhm, it's a lot to take in. But- but I'm here to just... give you a break. Just to let yourself relax, just for the time being.

Despite his scepticism, there was a wave of serenity that washed over him. For a moment... For a little longer than a moment, there was quiet. There wasn't anything that bothered him. His own thoughts weren't even tormenting him.

And he felt himself tear up.

...re...really? It's- this is going to stop?

Just for a while. I'm... I'm really sorry, Lav, I wish I could do more.

No... No, Del, you've done-

He took a deep breath in, smiling, seeming far more tired than he anticipated. He didn't realise how much was just... bottled up in there. For some time, all of his inner turmoil was just... Gone.

You've... done enough, really. Thank you. Honestly, thank you so much.

He finally felt some shred of motivation to do something, or at the very least, just go downstairs. Maybe this'll be nicer than he thought.

--

So... why haven't I heard you before? Or at least, seen you around NEARLY as abundantly as the usual prick?

Ah, uhm... That's partially my fault, and also... not? Uhm... Ender seems to have taken a particular... liking, to you, specifically. And for some reason, I can't... seem to really talk to you when he's latched on to you like that. At least, not any more than a normal person can. And even if I did, I have a feeling that it would be far more overwhelming than it would be of any help.

...Yeah, that makes sense. I uh... I didn't mean it as an insult, sorry if it came off like that. I dunno, I'm still tryna make heads and tails of this whole situation.

He put a hand through his hair, sighing.

...I have a feeling once you leave, it's going to be overwhelming regardless. Y'know, with the whole... soulcrushing guilt?

Yes, well... You aren't wrong about that. I didn't have much jurisdiction over this though. Personally, I would've much rather met you like a normal person. With the whole handshake and maybe a cup of cocoa.

You sound like an absolute angel of a person, huh?

Well, funny story, really...

--

He does have a cup of cocoa, sitting on the couch, sipping it slowly and letting the warm envelop him.

That's it, let yourself relax. You've deserved it.

He smiled a little to himself, squeezing his cup ever so slightly.

This is awfully nice, y'know. It doesn't even feel "too" nice. I don't feel paranoid. It's so strange.

Of course!! I don't want you thinking how you usually do... No offense, but it doesn't seem entirely healthy, nor does it seem to benefit anyone.

Well, you aren't wrong, I'll give you that. Thanks for this.

Of course, I'm just- uh, just doing my job!

Not really. I don't think you needed to do all this, but here you are. Uh... can I see what you look like? This seems a lot more... impersonal. It's nicer, don't get me wrong, but with Ender, it's more like... he feels like me. With this, it just... kinda feels like I've got a nice friend in my head.

And as per his request, Del materialised next to him, their wings small and hovering for the time being, along with their halo. The cloven feet and scarf really complemented their colours, and in general... They just seemed really soft and sweet. A tail seemed to rest on their lap, and they smiled towards Lav, completely innocent, with no ill intent whatsoever.

Is that any better?

Yeah... I think it is, at least. Wanna just hang out?

That does seem quite nice.

Want that cocoa?

--

Now he's catching himself cleaning the library, dusting the shelves, cleaning his room... Everything he's WANTED to do, but never really had any spirit left in him to do it. And now it felt... so much easier than it did before.

I appreciate the company a whole bunch. Feel like I haven't said that enough.

No need to thank me! Although I do feel as though I haven't really done much, have I?

Done much? Del, are you kidding? I mean, for the first time, in genuine YEARS, I don't have any sort of background thoughts stirring up in my head. I don't have a nag of every single thing that I'm doing being "wrong". I know it's not going to last, but honestly, I think this is the closest thing I've got to actual peace, man. At least by myself. Being able to just... think to myself, without some pompous arsehole chiming in, it's just.... the bar is so low, but it's a bar that you've managed to overcome and I can't thank you enough for it.

...really?

Yeah, really.

...how long do you have left?

...I'm afraid not long.

Figured. Well... I mean, it's not the end of the world. You can always visit. Just come in for a chat. I don't even care if it's unannounced, considering I have uninvited guests around all the time.

He chuckled to himself. Ah, he's hilarious.

I will... certainly try, although do understand-

That it'll be difficult? Yeah, somewhat not surprised, considering my luck. Don't stress, man. 's nice just to know that there are anons who don't want to kill me given the chance.

...I see.

Yeah, I know, low bar, but again, gotta take the small wins, y'know?

Del smiled again... They're glad to see that Lav's at least thinking slightly more positively now. They've done something right.

I'll be looking after the rest of your friends, don't worry. Bubble is a good friend of mine, actually. She gave me my name.

Really??? Damn, why did she never tell me about you?? That's crazy. I'll talk to her about it at some point.

Lav looked back at Del, seeing them slowly disappear.

See you around?

...hopefully. It was nice talking to you Lav. I'll see you another day.

They both smiled and waved, and a sickening transformation of Del's innocent, lamb-like body slowly twisting and lurching into a very recognisable figure made Lav's stomach churn. The horns pierced through the cloud-like hair, and the halo shattered into oblivion.

A thought popped into his head.

Perhaps one day you'll be worth loving.

...and there it is again.

[quiet-admirer]

Hey!

I was wondering about the difference in SSC and RACK kink approaches… and if I misunderstood something there or if the framing of it has changed since I’ve first came in contact with it 5+ years ago. If you want to check out my tags on the post I reblogged and want to talk about that I’d be curious and happy to chat :) If not, then sorry for the interruption. Wishing you a good day!

Hello, hope you're having a good day, too ☺️ Essay incoming, but there are a couple issues with using "safe, sane, and consensual" as a way to approach practicing kink.

[The tl;dr is that the SSC terminology is subjective and not specific enough to be useful.]

Firstly, it's vague and subjective. What does "safe" mean? I mean, vanilla sex isn't "safe" in the sense of being devoid of any risks. It's all relative; there are risks inherent in any activity, and that just means we educate ourselves about harm reduction strategies (wear a seat belt, use condoms). "Risk-aware" is more useful; it gives you an action to take: consider what you're going to be doing and make yourself aware of the risks involved in the kink you're practicing. Then you can decide if you'd like to do something to mitigate those risks or if you're okay with accepting potential consequences.

"Safe" just sends the message that if you can't make the activity safe, don't do it, which isn't very realistic. People are going to get off the ways they want to get off, but as communities, we can empower people to make informed decisions about their own sexual health without judgement if someone decides they are willing to assume certain risks. I think of it as RACK promoting critical thinking skills about engaging in your kink in the way that works for you, whereas SSC is prescriptive, assuming there's one definition of what "safe" is that works for everybody and that this definition is obvious and that to do kink "right" you have to be making sure it lives up to that definition of "safe."

Feedism and weight gain kink in particular are kinks that typically aren't given the green light under the SSC model in our culture. The Internet is full of tired, boring commentary about "who would ever make themselves fat on purpose, that's insane, you're destroying your health and killing yourself for a kink, get psychiatric help." SSC legitimizes this kind of thinking, or at least doesn't do anything to discourage it.

I'm much less generous about the use of "sane" in this acronym. "Sane," and correspondingly, "insane," are pathologizing and pejorative words used to dehumanize people who experience mental illness/mentally ill people. I disagree with the term "sane" being used in regards to kink in both directions: mentally ill/insane people (I'm using it as a reclaimed word here, hi, I'm mentally ill and insane) are human beings who deserve sexual autonomy, and kink practices should not be pathologized as indicating insanity just because the mainstream thinks they're weird.

I've also seen "sane" used to mean two different things. One is capable of giving consent, but isn't that already covered by "consensual?" And that definition, like you brought up, also often views substance use as something to be avoided, but intox and chemsex are established sexual practices that can be practiced with a RACK approach just like any other sexual stuff. "Sane" is also sometimes used to mean "woah there, let's not get too wild," but, like, why constrain sexuality to things the majority labels as "sane?" Why not get too wild? I would love to get more insane in how I express pleasure in my life! Fuck "sane," give me that risk-aware, consensual, insane shit please 🤲

In a practical sense though, it's another case of what is "sane" even supposed to mean? Some people think anything other than heterosexual post-marital missionary is insane. It's just so subjective that it becomes a useless metric.

Neither "safe" nor "sane" are cases of "you know it when you see it" when it comes to the wonderful diversity and depravity (affectionate) of human sexuality.

All right, now that I've said all that, I'm going to start sounding alarmist here, but bear with me.

A year ago my answer would have stopped there, but unfortunately, we're in the middle of a huge upswing in fascist, terfy, anti-sex purity culture that's been getting a little too real lately in the US (think banning public drag because it's "sexually obscene" with a dash of "but think of the children!", and regardless of the fact that drag performance... isn't inherently sexual performance, we're seeing demonization of non-normative sexuality being successfully used as a vehicle for suppressing non-normative gender expression).

Basically, when SSC leaves off at the vague "safe" prescription, it opens the door to anti-kink arguments of "but [insert kink] is dangerous, that means it's bad and evil!" With the way "kink-critical" arguments are a major way that fascism is making inroads into ostensibly leftist queer spaces, we gotta be deliberate with our language and fight that shit in every tiny (and big and direct) way we can.

"Sane" is even worse with the way the word "degenerate" (literal and actual 1930s German Nazism) is making a huge comeback and being applied to anyone with non-normative sexualities among other groups. So, sorry if this seems dramatic, but tying sanity in with sexuality in any way, and by extension labeling some forms of sexuality as "insane," isn't just a 'well, it's not the nicest way to phrase it,' situation when the cultural context is that freedom of speech and healthcare access are being systematically removed under the guise of arguments that equate and conflate gender nonconformity with non-normative sexuality and insanity.

I'm not blaming SSC for any of this, it just isn't doing anybody any favors in the antifascist department....

As a Mentally Ill, SSC has always rubbed me the wrong way, but it's an extra-special sore spot for me right now!

[destinyc1020]

I dont know if I agree completely with anons point, its about building your resume and taking on jobs, a good performance in a movie, tv show or theatre regardless will help an actor open up other avenues and meet with some of the best directors. Often its abput finding the best actor for a specific role ( not finding the best actor). I dont think his move to theatre is to attract the big directors or break a typecast, I think he just wanted to return to the stage and do something that appealed to him as you said hes a theatre kid at heart and throughout NWH press tours he mentioned wanting to go back to the stage. Jamie lloyd is an ideal director to work with for the stage. You'd be surprised directors look at all your work even the silly ones and sometimes its thw silly ones that make a director want to work with you. Directors have a great eye and know who has potential.

Also Austin didnt have anything of note prior to his theatre performance in the iceman cometh whereas tom was more established with spiderman and the impossible and billy elliott. Austin while he had his films and shows none of them really gave austin the ability to flex is acting muscle and felt that theatre really taught him how to improve as an actor especially when you work with someone as great as denzel.

Yea, I definitely agree with everything you said Anon. I think Tom is taking on the theater role for all of those reasons. It just diversifies your career honestly.

I think Anon was just wondering if it was to get out of the Marvel "Typecast Bubble" because Tom and Austin share the same agent. I think that's why Anon maybe perhaps thought that maybe there was a correlation. 😊 But you're exactly right! Austin wanted to hone more of his acting skills, and wasn't doing the type of work that he wanted to do, so he wanted to make a pivot and get some theater experience in order to really challenge himself and work on his craft more.

I will say..... #REALTALK (cover your eyes if you wish) While Tom definitely has way more fame and solid films under his belt than Austin had before doing his theater run, I do feel that in some way, Tom HAS been typecast somewhat, and put into a little bubble...Maybe, not so much by Hollywood execs, but by some filmgoers, and even SOME critics. (Notice I said SOME) It's not Tom's fault...He's a GREAT actor! But sometimes, people can be fickle and stubborn, and only want to see you in certain roles. 🙄 Sometimes, you do a role SO well, that now, people only establish you with that particular role, and only want to see you in THOSE types of movies. It's not fair.

It has happened to other actors (not just Marvel) as well. And I've seen countless Anons/fans in my inbox complaining about how they feel like the critics don't really appreciate Tom's non-Spider-Man work. Even Tom himself has said that he does NOT want to be put in a box. Imo, that might mean that he might be feeling that pressure (either from society or Hollywood) to only do one thing, and he doesn't want to do that. In fact, I don't know any actor who does.

I personally think the theater run is a great career move for him....No matter what his reasons are. 😊 It might be nice also to just get a bit of a change.

[fatexbound]

@chibitantei said:

Just like how one had to tune a piano every six months, changing the strings in the guitar was the same. While she wasn’t sure whether he preferred to change it himself or take it to a shop, she, at the very least, knew the type of strings he preferred and what brand. Nothing escaped a detective’s eye, after all. Still, it felt rather lackluster, although Naoto knew her gifts ended up more on the practical side. So Naoto continued to search. She stopped by one of the hobby shops in Okina, hoping to find her answer there. Aisles of figures from various shows and games she’d never heard of, but those weren’t what she wanted. It was a small section upstairs, but that was where she found miscellaneous model kits, ones that didn’t fit a specific category. In particular, there were a few from overseas, and while she wanted to take one for herself, she wasn’t here to indulge herself. One in particular caught her eye, a guitar model kit, which came with an amp. It was the right difficulty for Yosuke, she figured, and without a second thought, she took it downstairs to purchase it, along with asking the cashier to wrap it. On Christmas, Naoto handed her presents over to Yosuke and wondered what to say other than the typical greeting. “I hope you don’t mind that the presents are guitar-themed.” She glanced over in Satonaka’s direction where she was debating between which movie to put into the DVD player. It would be a while before the movie would start, and she’d said anyone could open their presents now. “But I thought of you when picking them out so... it’s the thought that counts.” With a huff, she tugged at the brim of her cap. “I should have said Merry Christmas from the start, or rather, Merry Christmas, Yosuke.”

Christmas asks | Accepting

Christmas, from a poor employee's perspective, was absolute hell for him. This week he was free and he took the opportunity to host a little party at his house, inviting his friends, with Yu and Naoto being the first ones to arrive. Just basking in her presence was enough to make his day and his heart flutter like the hopeless romantic fool he was. Everyone had something to give him, and in turn, so did he. He couldn't get away with not buying anything, even if he wanted to avoid emptying his Christmas bonus paycheck.

Once it was Naoto's turn, an instant smile curled on his lips, taking the perfectly wrapped presents. From the weight of them, they were a little heavy, but the word 'guitar-themed' caught his attention. His hands moved on their own right then and there, though not so far as to ruin it. The contents were... new and more importantly, caused a huge grin to appear on his face.

"Th-this is amazing, holy shit! I've never assembled such a thing before, but I'll definitely give it a shot! Thanks, Naoto!" With his cheeks flushed out of excitement, he planted a quick kiss on her lips while no one was looking, chuckling all the while. Man, his guitar collection grew more as the years went by.

"Oh, hang on a sec. I got you something nice too! I hope it's useful to you, anyway." He got up to take a small box from behind the Hanamura family's Christmas tree, handing it to her. "I figured you'd like a neat little... laser gadget thing to fiddle with." Inside, she would discover a wristwatch, made to look like a fancy sci-fi gadget with a laser pointer at the push of a button. It could change colors too and acted as a small flashlight besides pointing in whatever direction she wanted to aim at.

"So... Merry Christmas to you too, Naoto!"

Honestly, he wished this party was a little more private now.

[kobblefort]

Rushsly: The Early Days 3

It's hard for me to believe that anyone actually believes in the things they're selling. I genuinely believe we are basically living in a world controlled by Ed Edd & Eddy except replicated as archetypes onto the entire 'business class' instead of as just three funny cartoon characters. More and more shit is built to break instead of last and half the things people try to sell you literally aren't even real. I mean surely the day traders and NFT hawkers are laughing, right? They've got to be thinking, oh my god, those suckers actually bought it. Now they just have a piece of paper that says "soybean futures." Now they have a little bit of text permanently adhered to a little bit of the internet telling everyone that they own one particular ape PNG. But I don't know because when I try to meet them where they're at, read their Twitters and Facebooks and Reddits and shit, they sould like they actually believe every word of it. I always assume all the jargon is to make it sound more legitimate to outsiders but I guess if you go through all the trouble of learning this bullshit language you have to convince yourself it actually means something. That pieces of paper that say "soybean futures" and claims to owning particular ape PNGs really matter. Nothing in Dwarf Fortress is real either but I don't want to act like it is or make anyone else act like it is. A machine blinks certain patterns of light at me to stimulate my imagination in response to my input. Neither my world or yours will actually be changed by the text and sprites on the monitor. And I don't want to sell you anything. I just want to play with my fake little computer people. You can watch if you'd like.

I forgot our civilization is fucking called The Comedy of Sweating. Here we see the kobolds dancing a jig called "The Pregnancy of Glitter." What the fuck is with our names guys seriously

Armor and weapons are created. Training begins. However the ratfucks have already left the area. It's not really a waste, since I will eventually need the military, but it kind of feels like it, because the ratfolk got to just come in and kill some kobbles and then leave with no bother at all. We've been made Bitches of this world...

The kobbles bury Alzlr tooth-by-tooth. Moods sure are dropping around the fortress! But the worst mood goes to a certain ranger turned guard captain...

In the midst of taking this screenshot, he jumped from the second-worst possible mood to the third-worst, so I guess training is going well for him. It makes sense. When you see people who are like "I pick up heavy stuff and put it back down until my brain stops making the bad thoughts" they do that because it works. You literally can run away from the bad feelings, like physically run, or at least make a really heavy dumbbell go up and down, you can just take a brisk walk away from the bad feelings. It's very frustrating that it works this way because the very last thing you want to do when you have the bad feelings is do the things that meaningfully get rid of the bad feelings. It's easier to just drink alcohol but then you just feel even worse later. I don't understand people who smoke weed to "get away from their problems" because I literally become my problems, I get high and scared and the only way to fix it is to clean my apartment and make active steps toward getting my shit together, but I guess some people do smoke weed to specifically not do that, and that's probably bad too, but I don't know, it doesn't seem as bad as drinking I guess.

I've come to the opinion that everyone in a green shirt is useless to this fort. Animal dissectors, hunters, whatever, we really don't need that shit.

Working on some upstairs fortification and suddenly we are menaced by a fucking Werebeaver. I wish I got a screenshot of it but things happened real quick.

A hunter and a peasant run out on the bridge to fight it there, which is both the worst place for them to do it because they will be crushed and instantly deleted by the moving bridge, but also the best place for them to do it, because the were-beaver will also be crushed and instantly deleted by the moving bridge. And so, both the were-beaver and any potential infected it created are obliterated with minimal casualties and the single pull of a lever. Look yeah it's fucked up as hell but I've seen too many fortresses go down over were-beasts. The last time I had to do the trolley problem for a video game was the quiz at the beginning of Prey and that hardly counts. It's better for any potentially infected to die because simply put if they don't there will be way more death. So we say goodbye to a hunter and a peasant (I have to pretend I'm not pleased with this) and life goes on. However the were-beaver got WAY too close to our door, mere tiles away from dooming the entire fort, so I've decided to build some bird towers. "What is a bird tower" you might ask?

I'll get back to you on that, but first I have to memorialize the guys crunched up in the mechanisms of the bridge so that they don't come back as ghosts and haunt us. Seu Dacrilz was apparently a fellow glove pervert - RIP to a real one. 😔

Nobody knew what to say about Gralit, who was a hunter, which, you know, oh noooo, that sucks sooo baaadd haha xx, im sooo sorry. Either way, the catacombs are starting to get uncomfortably full over here, seven occupied coffins and two memorial slabs. I'm going to use the slabs to block them in so that if a necromancer ever attacks they can't raise our fallen homies, and it's also very space-efficient. I'm sure that's cold but I'm following the golden rule on this one. I'm literally an organ donor, the second I die they can cut me right open and start giving out my guts like Halloween candy. I don't give a shit, I don't need it anymore. What's the deal, is it going to make me look fucked up for my funeral or something? I don't care, I'm literally not even going to fucking be there.

So the idea behind a bird tower is that you put some birds on top of a tower. Well, ideally just one bird, but we have a peacock and a peahen, so if we lock off their pen with a nest box they'll be able to have some babies, which will ultimately let us expand our bird tower operations. Animals can "scout" for enemies that don't automatically reveal themselves when they appear on the map but instead need a kobble or animal to actually physically make line-of-sight visual contact with them. The reason you have to use birds is that because in Dwarf Fortress, rather than having to feed birds with tiles of grass, they simply generate insects and other tiny vermin into existence around them, which they themselves eat for sustenance. I've heard they plan on changing this mechanic eventually, but I don't want them to, because it's quite useful and more importantly really funny.

Sparring has begun so "RIP my mentions!!!" as someone who just posted something inflammatory on purpose would say. Unfortunately, unlike someone who just posted something inflammatory on purpose and is very clearly in the wrong, I cannot just say "Alright - I'm muting this now." I don't know how I fucked up my alerts like this or how to fix it but oh well shit happens. It's not that big of a deal. It used to make a little clicky sound every time a move happened which was a that big of a deal but now it's just kind of stopped. In the kitchen I suddenly had an intrusive thought of me taking my chef knife and just absolutely cutting myself into pieces. The imaginary vision of seeing the blade slice right across my eyes is still so vivid that I keep physically cringing, LOL!!!!!

Oh fuck me, more ratfolk thieves. Pretty disappointed in the Bird Tower for missing them completely.

However they were absolutely fucked on by both squads in an instant. A little annoyed at how much bow-bashing I'm seeing, ranged weapons in the current version of Dwarf Fortress are a bit fucked and I'm sure the mods are only making it worse. Archers carrying around bolts and crossbowbolds carrying around arrows, it's pandemonium. Well they'll figure it out. Or they won't.

Dwarves roll into town again. Our economy has been banging hard as fuck lately so hopefully we'll be able to buy up all of their meat and cheese and booze and whatever other stuff looks shiny. To a kobble, seeing a shiny thing is like how playing Xbox 360 is for us.

koble eat chease lol

The dwarves try to hardball us into selling all our ammo to them, but that sounds like a terrible idea, so we just give them more gems. And one stack of arrows, because that was worth 1000* to them, even though dwarves don't even use arrows. Whatever though not my business how you wanna spend your money! We walk away with absolute mountains of fine cloth, meat, fish, and vegetables.

Making steel is taking forever, and trying to move the metal bar stockpile up one floor is a total shitshow so far. Speaking of floors, one simply has to wonder whether it's time to dig for the caverns or not yet. Forgotten beasts and that ugly mold lurk below, but it's also where you can get black and blood-red wood by chopping down mushrooms, so it's impossible to say whether it's good or bad. We haven't actually needed power for anything, the kobbles are doing fine without milling and minecart rollers would be a lot of trouble just for me to fuck up and crash heavy iron minecarts into poor innocent kobbles over and over because I suck at minecarts. I've been thinking about making one of those "minecart shotguns" that just crashes into a barricade and shoots a bunch of spikes or something everywhere, but for now, I'm going to try serrated disc weapon traps because I've never really used them before.

The rainbow worshippers have had a good run of being the only religion with a temple but I'm afraid we're going to have to make at least a "general purpose" temple. For off-brand religions. In case you worship the store-brand god. The Wal-Mart of churches, if you will

Clicking on this random tile is how I found out the emblem of our civilization is three cabbages. That makes me really happy. I just had this idea for the trap tunnel of paving a road into the base with lignite or bituminous coal stones, then having magma waiting behind some floodgates above it so that it can drop down and start the entire road on fire, or at least I think that's how it would work. I'm going to try it out, it'll work in tandem with the iron sawblade traps I think.

Will it actually do anything? Impossible to tell. For once I'm actually kind of excited to get invaded. Speaking of invaders these guys just showed up that are the opposite of that.

Can I be real with you man I don't like what you guys are doing. I don't know if it's weirder or less weird that you milked a more sapient creature than just a kangaroo. I would already not like you milking the kangaroos in the first place but that's just something we do with animals we're all past that I guess. Like if I sold you human milk would you buy it. I don't know. But they had a drake and a goose so fuck it, second Bird Tower complete. The peacock and peahen are sitting on 6 eggs right now but who knows if they were actually fertilized or not.

Let's actually take a minute just to get some zoomed out shots of the base, show what a fuckfest it is.

First floor below the moat level is pretty normal. Just some farms, and then a Craftsbold guildhall that they never really use. I really like diagonal doors, but I haven't actually been using too many in this fort.

Below that, the "throw shit on the floor" floor. Pretty much all furnaces with two asheries, and the stockkeeper's bedroom+office+dining hall (left) and the caravan voice's bedroom+office+dining hall (right (There is no difference besides the color of that one door (They're also a bit shit)))

Catacombs floor. That pit you're seeing in the bottom left was original my garbage dumping pit but then it was kinda where I wanted to put my moat and the kobbles didn't really like throwing stuff into the water for some reason so I had to dig a different garbage pit.

Miscellaneous fuckery floor. This is a nightmare, lol. I wanted to "have fun with organic shapes" at the start but I kind of just made horrific spaghetti. I mean it's efficient spaghetti is the thing, these kobbles get shit done fast. Except steel. That's taking forever, almost 4 seasons since I finally got the steel process started and it's only yielded 80 bars so far. Still I can probably get started on steel weapons soon.

The Merriment Floor. We got our tavern The Permanent Snack, temple to the god of rain and rainbows The Pale Chapel, off-brand church with a window to view into the burning floor trap, and (I really hope I don't regret it lol) and just through the tavern is the Chief's chambers. Yep you can go straight from getting drunk to yelling at the chief, he's literally right next door, he has to pass through the tavern to get to and from his bedroom, we don't let his ass slide for anything!!! If we make it until the Winged One comes over, that'll eventually be their lot in life too. We don't let nobility just slink around private gardens and luxury apartments having secret little meetings here your ass is EXPOSED.

Did one of the kobbles literally do the "bucket balanced on the door" prank. Do you see that shit in the bottom left did they do that??? what the fuck?????

Military area. The archery range is temporarily shut down because I fear I have the "arrows/bolts disappearing through the floor" glitch again (it has happened before) but after a couple seconds of observation the kobbles don't really care that I clicked pause on the zone and will continue shooting at the targets. They do however use the little arrow return gutter downstairs but when there were more targets, more ammo seemed to just disappear. Like there were all 5 targets in a row there for a while and the ammo was just gone.

I still haven't really wrapped my head around how fucking big the iron veins I found down here are. I mean holy fuck we are balling. Ok I ran out of images so that's the end of another post.

[pictureamoebae]

Hello lovely helpful person! I have a question about Otis dof addon, is it possible to focus on two characters at the same time (in Bg3). Like a scene where tav and a companions stands next to each other or a romance/kiss scene, it seems that its only possible to focus on one point at once, if that makes sense? everything else gets blurry. Is this just the way it is or can you alter the focus somehow, so several things are in focus, like a group of 4 people? Thank you so much!!! Hope you understand my question (:

Hi anon!

Try to imagine the space in front of you in terms of linear distance from the camera to the farthest point in the distance.

When you focus, you're not focusing on a specific object per se, but rather on a particular distance between the camera and the horizon. Anything in the scene that is at that exact distance from the camera will be in focus, whether it's in the very centre of the screen, or off to the left or the right, top or bottom.

Anything you want to be in focus has to be at that distance.

Let's assume the camera is at 0 and the horizon is at 1, and half way between them is 0.5. If Tav is standing at 0.2 and Shadowheart is standing at 0.4 you can either focus at 0.2 or at 0.4 to have one of them in focus, but one of them will be out of focus. You can't set two different focus points because you'd end up with blur from both of them messing them both up.

There are a couple of ways to work around this, and as always with ReShade both involve compromise.

The first would be to change your composition so both characters are the same distance from the camera. That's nice and simple, but can sometimes ruin the composition you wanted.

The second is to adjust a bunch of stuff to mimic how a real camera creates blurred and in focus areas. Zoom (FoV) will affect how strong the blur is and how quickly it goes from in focus to out of focus. Theoretically, the closer you zoom in (the lower your FoV) the stronger the blur will become and the quicker it will start after the in focus area. Additionally, lowering the bokeh size in the IGCSDoF settings will also create a softer transition between the in focus area and the blurred areas. This can help create a wider zone of space that is in focus, meaning your characters may not have to be at the exact same distance away from the camera.

Unfortunately, because of the way IGCSDoF renders everything, that zone will still always be somewhat narrow, and, especially if you wanted rather strong blur in the background, you'll likely find yourself battling against some areas that aren't in focus that you wish were.

Luckily, there's a secret third way that can come to the rescue: Photoshop*.

I frequently find myself taking a shot with IGCSDoF, and one without, and then opening them in Photoshop to blend them together so I get what I want in focus. I do this a lot with close portraits where I want a decently strong background blur but find as a result only the eye is in focus and the nose and sometimes even the mouth is slightly out of focus. I layer the screenshots over one another, add a layer mask, and paint out the areas of blur I don't want so the in focus parts come through.

There are always going to be limitations with ReShade and screenshot tools more generally because it's trying to mimic real world behaviour in an artificial digital game space, so we have to get crafty sometimes!

*Other programs are available

[vtoriacore-rbs]

@angelhairpastawithherbs Q's for the matchup info I'll need :D you can answer them in replies, inbox, reblog or wherever you feel comfortable. if you're uncomfortable answering certain questions don't be afraid to skip them !!

1) MBTI/Zodiac sign (optional)

2) 3-5 hobbies / interests that you're really into or focused on (if comfortable could provide a story relating to each to get a better feel for how you act in different situations - more general aspects of personality)

3) love language(s) you have + love language(s) of a preferred partner (whether romantic or platonic)

4) your biggest personality trait? (something that tends to stand out regardless of what situation you're in, eg. optimism)

5) 3-4 aspects of your personality which are considered positive by your standards (eg. ambitious? empathetic? hard working? etc.)

6) 3-4 aspects of your personality which are considered negative by your standards (something you might want to improve on or something you wish you could change - you don't have to go into detail with this at all, or you may skip this if you're not comfortable answering this question!)

7) your favourite story to tell/favourite positive memory? (only if you're comfortable sharing - and you can make it as vague as you wish if you choose to answer)

8) academics? (what subjects you're studying, what grades you get etc. you can answer however you want as long as it relates to school)

9) favourite aesthetic? (could incl colours, fashion sense, locations etc. you can be as specific or as vague as you want)

10) favourite food? (are you a takeout person? home cooked meals? restaurants? have any particular cultural dishes you like or maybe are interested in another cultures dishes?)

11) physical touch or physical touch averse?

12) the space you feel safest in? (could be vague answers like city, nature or as specific as being in a cozy bed next to the window watching the ocean)

13) preferred pet names you'd want your partner to call you? could include as many as you want (mostly optional question)

14) goals and ambitions? (eg. getting a specific job, buying the ideal house or car etc. could be related to anything)

15) sense of humour? (dark and edgy? dad jokes? etc.)

16) (LARGELY OPTIONAL) any ideal partner in mind already? could be extremely vague and although this would play into my decision the previous questions would still take precedence !!

This is the most basic list I can come up with I'm sorry if it's still too long- you can skip out whichever questions you feel like if you're uncomfortable or just don't like them !!