#if the anon is a friend of mine feel free to ask on discord

[hoseoksluna]

THE FUN DAY, pt. I. | kth ft. pjm

pairing: idol!military!boyfriend!taehyung x f. reader (ft. best friend!jimin)

genre: fluff, angst �� the sad kind

word count: 4.8k

summary: you've prepared a fun day for your boyfriend's military vacation. thank god he's here, right?

pin: f. / playlist: fun / taglist: join / discord: join

warnings: suggestive but not described themes of sex and alcohol consumption.

note: i'm so EXCITED to bring you this fic that i can't wait until tomorrow to post this. everyone welcome TAEHYUNG and JIMIN to the hoseoksluna universe. i have to tell you a secret. taehyung was my first bias when i first became army. taehyungie was the first one to save me from the bunch—literally to resurrect me because in him i found all the things i used to love and fell out of. jazz, poetry, the aesthetics and arts. it is an honor to write about him and i think i will write another taehyung fic next week. if you have any ideas, drop them in my ask box and i will use them for inspiration. this fic is dedicated to my baby ruru @tkslovechild, my tatlim @jjk7k, and the beautiful anon that asked me for a tae fic while i was already working on this one. i love you all so much. enjoy this beautiful piece. <3 mwah.

𓂃 ౨ৎ .

I am much too alone in this world, yet not alone enough to truly consecrate the hour. I am much too small in this world, yet not small enough to be to you just object and thing, dark and smart. I want my free will and want it accompanying the path which leads to action; and want during times that beg questions, where something is up, to be among those in the know, or else be alone.

I want to mirror your image to its fullest perfection, never be blind or too old to uphold your weighty wavering reflection. I want to unfold. Nowhere I wish to stay crooked, bent; for there I would be dishonest, untrue. I want my conscience to be true before you; want to describe myself like a picture I observed for a long time, one close up, like a new word I learned and embraced, like the everday jug, like my mother's face, like a ship that carried me along through the deadliest storm.

𓂃 ౨ৎ . — I Am Much Too Alone in This World, Yet Not Alone by Rainer Maria Rilke

It was your love language, to dress up like your boyfriend. 

Dress pants, shirts and jackets. Linen, silk, leather. Pointed heels or oxford shoes. Grays, browns, beiges and whites. It was something that made you happy—and it was something that represented a vessel, made of unbreakable porcelain, for your love that you carried for Taehyung. 

He’s sitting in the corner of your bedroom, on a wooden stool he specifically placed at such a picturesque place. With the ivory curtains drifting along the nape of his neck, sheer enough to expose the small vase of tulips that stoop in a private longing for his touch. He fondles them often to preoccupy his mind when you take your usual long showers and he waits for the fashion shows you give him. He’s the one who says yes or no. These shoes, love. Look, they’re just like mine. And right at this moment, the wine-yellow petals are caught between his slender fingers when you come out and he doesn’t let go of them—because you’re not holding up the outfit for the day as you always are. 

For the fun day as you’ve called it. 

You’re dressed in it. Low-waisted gray dress pants with a little, tight, white shirt. Black stilettos, black shoulder purse. Your trench coat is waiting for you in the hall, hung up and lonely, but other than that you’re matching him fully. It feels as though you’re fading into him, becoming a singular being that has his DNA and his beauty, and when he beams up at you, boxy smile on full show, spine straight and tall on the stool, long fingers gripping its rim, Taehyung, with his gray suit and a white shirt, somehow validates that feeling. 

Somehow, in that peculiar Taehyung way of his. 

He extends his hands towards you, asking for your closeness. There’s a mist of murkiness that envelops him, with the saddened clouds beyond the window, standing in the place of the sun. It moves through you, this image of him reaching for you in this landscape, and you think he deserves to be painted like this. With black charcoal and a little bit of soft carmine to eternalize the blush of his cheeks—the only trace of color in the sketchbook. Your hands don’t know the art of drawing, but your heart does and while you take those necessary steps towards him, you feel the scratches of that dark pencil over that grainy flesh. 

His palms find your curves and you consider it unbelievable, the fact he’s still so big, despite the size of the stool and the height of your heels. No matter how much taller you grow, he’ll always be that tower that protects you from the blazing heat of the sun. 

He’s the epitome of autumn. No longer a boy, but a man, whose lungs are perfumed by apples, leaves, cinnamon, pumpkin spice and the slight iciness of the seasonal wind. Whose eyes witnessed the growth of your form since you were a little girl with two long braids. 

Childhood best friends turned to lovers, favored by the hanging, twinkling stars. 

You always saw him the most in autumn. Chasing you down during festivities that your mom couldn’t not be a part of, grabbing a hold of one of your braided pigtails with his already long fingers, then tickling you until you gave up. Ever so easy to catch because of the length of your hair. You knew, even as a little girl, that he was not just a part of your life, but your life itself. More than a companion, more than a friend. You dreamed about having his babies and that dream would come to life through your imagination whenever he would chase you down, years later, in the grand halls of the east wing of his grandiose family home, where nobody ever comes, just to steal a kiss or two. It was the moment you realized that you were no longer kids, even though you acted as such, but that you desired little legs to follow you in the fun of it all. 

And that kiss changed every autumn from that year on.

Stolen glances, the blush of cheeks, quivering fingers that no longer grabbed your braids. Not until many autumns later. You gave him your everything, every bit of your newly-bloomed femininity, your dream of having his babies and he folded it into the vinyls of his favorite jazz music that he would play every night whenever he needed inspiration or whenever he simply needed you. 

Newly. Not just yet as adults and no longer as kids. Somewhere in between. 

And then the duties of adulthood came. The natural process of drifting apart settled between your bodies and you no longer played in the stage between. Taehyung, the saxophone-playing jazz singer, moving foreign bodies into his personal, heart-sung rhythm. Not yours, never yours for a long time. You, working a day job that never paid enough, not for the dresses you yearned to wear at those clubs he would play at. 

But what you didn’t know was that drifting apart meant coming together eventually. 

He might have become your Turnip Head, silent and distant, but you were Sophie—and you found him. You found him while looking for something, or someone for the lack of better words, and he helped you. Over a cup of coffee he didn’t drink, at a jazz bar you always wanted to come to. Your date was a hit and miss and the guy never came, and your Turnip Head didn’t help you find your Howl. 

He helped you find himself. And from that moment on, you never drifted apart again. 

Who would’ve thought that seeking a relationship that did not resemble your dream nor your childhood would make you find him all over again. 

In autumn, too. 

Taehyung paid for your dresses, your female suits, paid for your drinks. Kissed you underneath those dimmed, brown lights before he went off to play songs that moved your body at last. Dancing alone to his songs was your dream come true until he set down his saxophone and joined you. Let his band mates play his favorite Etta James song as he took your hand and drifted upon the dance floor with you. Those who danced before this song sat down, let you have this opportunity for yourself, and Taehyung kissed you, after a long time, after many autumns had passed, right then and there. 

And both of you realized that you could never drift apart again. You could only drift together. 

You moved in together. He bought you tulips of every possible hue every week. Played you his new songs for you on the saxophone. Took you to art galleries. Took you sightseeing, sometimes alone with you, sometimes with Jimin joining you. Shared your dream about having babies with you and talked about it all the time. Tried it out, seized it many times, though the outcome both of you desired never came. Had a beautiful life with you until…

Until he thinned out into his Turnip Head form and skipped away to fulfill his country duties. 

But he’s here. Oh, he’s here. Buff and big, apples, cinnamon and pumpkin spice. Brown eyes that carry the memory of your growth, hands that clutch your hips and that hold the silky memory of your still long braids. Hands that edge around your slightly, barely puffy tummy and that don’t know that you are with a concoction of a small him and you, a divine magical realism, a dream that came true without his knowledge right after the last hours of his military vacation were up and he had to go back to serve the country. 

The reason behind this fun day. 

The day of his second vacation, the day you tell him. 

“You look just like me,” he breathes, the width of his smile never lessening, hands skipping over the space between your hips and your arms and grabbing your hands. It gets to you still, the way his eyes never look up at you, the way they never have, and you feel so sweetly small. Even more so when Taehyung stands to his feet and slides his suit jacket over your shoulders. You become even smaller, a fawn taken care of. A pregnant fawn. “And now you are me.” 

Oh, he doesn’t know just how much. Not yet. 

He sits back down and gently pushes you to take a step back. On wavering feet, like that freshly-born fawn, you waver on your feet, but Taehyung keeps you stable, leaning forward to make sure you’ve caught your balance. A wisp of his dark hair falls over his eye that he, at last, flicks up at you. And the sensation from it, it is nothing that you ever felt before. 

It is a step forward. 

It’s something that tells you: go ahead. 

You planned to tell him at the jazz bar where he kissed you for the first time as an adult and made you his. But now, now it feels more than right, amidst this strange newness that you don’t think you’ll ever experience again. 

You open your mouth, brace yourself, but Taehyung is faster. Ringing fills your ears, the atmosphere around you feels gooey—as if you’re walking through a limbo. 

“Jimin will meet us at the park.” 

Oh, yes. Walk in the park, a warm drink to go, then the jazz bar. Jimin is having his military break as well, about to sing in Taehyung’s honor, you already knew this, knew he would join you, but being in the presence of your boyfriend, the detail slipped out. 

The newness leaves. Taehyung straightens. Towers over you. The normalcy flattens over the chemistry between you and him, the atmosphere lessening to feathery lightness and when you move your arms to give back his jacket, your arms feel as though they’re not your own. 

Your smile falls. 

Jazz bar it is. 

“We should go,” you prompt, turning around, having all the balance in the world as you go fetch your purse and reapply your red lipstick. 

Taehyung watches you in the mirror, his boxy grin on eternal display, warming your heart. You think about how you can’t wait until his baby witnesses that smile for the first time—and wonder if God is molding, at this very hour, the same one upon their little face. It brings tears to your eyes, ones that you quickly blink away, and instead you focus on lining your lips with the tip of the lipstick with utmost precision. 

In your vast collection of lip liners, you don’t have a red one. Truth be told, you always feared this vibrant color. It represented a stigma you never liked—that only promiscuous women wear that color, but to you it was never that. 

It was a color that meant you lose your girlhood, your childhood upon wearing. 

And now, it is a color that announces the next era of your life: adulthood, but different, painted with motherly instincts that are of these vibrant hues. Womanhood. No longer fearful, but brave. 

Right. 

You want your baby to connect this color to you and know that you made it. You waited your whole life for their father and gave it to him in one of the autumns as a child. Without knowing, without realizing. 

That color is a legacy. 

As if he could hear your thoughts, Taehyung kisses the back of your head, halting your motions. Wraps his arms around you as he props his chin on the place he kissed—and right here, right now, you’re looking at a family portrait in the mirror. 

A living, breathing one. With lifting chests in tandem, growing smiles and a growing baby in your womb. 

Magical realism in full effect. 

And then Taehyung is off to fetch your trench coat, holding it up for your arms to slip inside its sleeves. Grabs your hand and revels in the autumn weather outside, boxy smile never faltering. Sings in the car on the way to the park, makes eye contact as he mouths the lyrics—kiss me once and kiss me twice, then kiss me once again, it’s been a long, long time—because he could never sing over that part. It’s too precious to his heart for him to do so. 

The wind accompanies you and grabs your other hand as you walk down the pathway lined with half-barren trees and a still pond. Taehyung hums the Bing Crosby song that seems to be playing on loop within his mind and it is the only greenery that spreads around through his husky voice. All else—the pond, the trees and the last of their leaves that dance around you, the shrubberies and the clouds up above—are smeared with sullen blues and grays, to which Taehyung is everlastingly immune. 

Jimin is standing by an antique coffee stand, dressed to the nines in an outfit he most definitely must be cold in. Black dress pants with a jacket that stuns you. A matching Hussar one, with golden braiding. A military piece of clothing from another time. You think it suits the fun day quite delightfully, but not as much as it suits him. The golden detail goes hand in hand with his golden hair and you think he needs his picture taken. 

“Jimin!” you call out, making his confused little face turn in your direction, and he swivels his body to face you altogether. He holds two cups of coffee in both of his hands, one for him and one for you. You melt at that and look up at Taehyung to see his boxy smile ever so frozen and beautiful, pointed at his best friend. 

When you reach him, he hugs you. His cold skin stings you and you quickly warm him up with rubbing motions against his back. Scrunch your brows in puzzlement when he doesn’t hug Taehyung nor even look at him. 

But all is swept away when Jimin exclaims in discomfort and takes a rapid sip of his boiling drink. 

“Jimin, where’s your coat?” you ask him in pity, watching him shake and moan in pain once he burns his tongue. He uses the cup to warm up both of his hands. 

“I didn’t think Paris would be so cold in October,” he explains in a hushed, livid tone, drawing the rim of the paper cup back to his lips as if he didn’t learn his lesson. Typical Jimin. “But this outfit is for Taehyung anyways, so I’ll survive.” 

He talks of him but he doesn’t look at him. Makes heart eyes at the misting coffee, instead. Like Taehyung isn’t here at all. 

Strange. 

You shake off the thought. 

“Go stand by the pond before you freeze. I want to take a picture of you,” you say, softly, pulling your phone out of your purse. Glancing up, you expect Jimin to be ready with his pose, but he’s looking at you as if you said the most outrageous thing in the world. Eyes wide, mouth downturned in horror. You laugh and place a hand on his arm. “Go, Jimin. This is a special day and special days ask for special pictures.” 

Jimin sighs and nods, despite the fact he doesn’t really look like he wants to do it. 

“Fine, but I’m keeping the coffee in my hand.” 

Your tender laughter prolongs. “Fair enough. Go pose with your little heat pack.” 

Gazing out at the pond, Taehyung is already standing there. With his brown coat over his gray suit, he coalesces with the autumnal scenery and you think he belongs there. That a statue should be made of him right where his feet are planted, for people to remember and appreciate his beauty. You snap a few pictures of him before Jimin makes his way towards the stone bannister and stops right in front of Taehyung, who towers over him. Jimin lifts his cup and smiles a little tight smile, the mist from his coffee eclipsing over him like a soft fog. Switching to portrait mode, Taehyung is gone by the time your screen clears out and shows Jimin by his lonesome self, setting his coffee cup down on the bannister and turning around for some dramatic, aesthetic shots. Taehyung laughs in your ear, catches your slipping purse and places it back on your shoulder, and what he says next gives your life a whole new meaning. 

“Jimin is cute, but he’s strong and sane enough to protect you while I’m gone.”

You pivot back, piercing your sight right through him, not believing those words were just flung out of him like that. Taehyung never mentioned you having a protector while being in the military and even the whole concept of it confuses you even deeper as Jimin is serving as well. He might not be in the special forces like your boyfriend is, but he’s serving nonetheless. The systems are the same, no matter the department. 

Before you can ask him what he meant by that, the sing-song tone of Jimin’s voice reaches you. He calls out your name with a bit of alarm. 

“What’s wrong?” 

You gaze back and meet his eyes in full motion—he’s already taking long steps towards you and grabbing your arm, taking your confusion to another level.  

“What happened?” he asks, his pupils thin dots that ripple through your skin with stiff, panicky electroshocks. You glance back at Taehyung to discover that he’s not standing behind you at all, but behind Jimin, clutching his shoulder. 

You blink. “Nothing.” 

Jimin lets go of your arm and inhales the autumnal air. The pond, suddenly, heaves. 

“Let’s go somewhere warm,” Jimin suggests and you agree with him with a nod of your head. Pinpricks of iciness kisses your fingertips, despite the fact you’re still holding your own cup of coffee that Jimin bought you. 

A strange feeling seizes you. 

The jazz bar is an embrace of snug heat that embraces your womb first before greeting the rest of your body. You can’t help but to touch your baby, say to her in your heart: this is your Daddy’s most favorite place in the whole wide world. And the feeling is so surreal that it washes away the strange sensation that clung to you so heavily. 

You’re the first customers to come. Jimin sighs in absolute relief and he’s standing in the middle of the dance floor, frozen in time, as he lets the warmth of the place defrost his bones. Your cup of coffee was long finished and discharged; Jimin’s drank his in long sips that took seconds to finish, too, and the whole ordeal was so funny to you that it’s given you a sense of lightness that you needed. 

Taehyung hasn’t spoken a word since you left your apartment. 

He sits at the bar stool like he sat in your shared bedroom. One leg propped on the footrest while the other is relaxed on the floor, one hand folded on the apex of his thigh, the other drumming on the bar while the band he doesn’t know is rehearsing their instruments. You take a seat right beside him and feel like the parents you’re about to become. Sophisticated, classical, sublime. 

The pretentious kind, but in a good way. 

That thought makes you smile softly until the bartender asks you if you’d like anything. You politely decline her, even though you’d love a glass of wine with the daddy to be beside you. You can’t drink, not for many months to come. You wait for her to ask Taehyung the same question, but she doesn’t even lift her eyes to his direction. She wipes down the wood of the bar and leaps away. 

Nobody fucking asks Taehyung anything. 

Amidst a hearty guitar strumming solo, Jimin notices the furrow of your brows, the downturned pout of your mouth that opens to ask Taehyung about the strangeness that keeps occurring today. But before you get the words out, Jimin calls out your name into the microphone, the vowels made sweet by the sound of his princely voice. He stands with the band behind his back, his Hussar jacket exquisitely fitting the dimmed background. He holds out his hand for you, a poignant glint perched on top of his irises, and he flattens his puffy, pink lips. 

“Don’t be sad. Tonight is for Taehyung and all sadness is prohibited,” he says with his feigned announcer articulations, the corners of his mouth rounding in a similar manner to yours, in sympathy. “We will have to kindly ask you to leave if you proceed in your sadness. Please, join me here.” 

You roll your eyes, but the smile gracing your features couldn’t be erased even with the force of the whole wide world. You stand to your feet and paddle your way to him, the heels of your stilettos clicking on the worn parquets. Jimin gives you a soft grin and places his microphone down, meeting you halfway on the dance floor and taking your hand. 

It is when he begins to sing, just for you, that you perceive that the instrumental song the guitarist played is one, which is contained in one of Taehyung’s vinyls. The ones he would play in the darkest of nights and sing the lyrics to your bare body. Tears prick your waterline when Jimin guides you into a gentle slow dance while maintaining the tones of the song with utmost perfection. 

And Taehyung is carried in every languid motion and in every vocal cord that is strained upon this hour in his honor. 

I’m in the mood for love, simply because you’re near me…

You gaze back at Taehyung, who sits still and smiles his boxy smile. Frozen and beautiful, but unbreathing. 

Still and unbreathing. 

Frozen. 

You halt your movements. 

Jimin stops the dance, ends the song with a deep hum that pulses through you along with the notion that something isn’t right, but very, very wrong. 

“I wish Taehyung were here,” Jimin says with a deep sigh, holding both of your hands, and an uncanny, perplexing feeling constricts your throat. 

Your breath shivers, vision blurry. “But he is here.” 

Jimin lets go of your hands and you lament his touch. You need to be touched because you feel yourself shrinking into a fawn most vulnerable that doesn’t know what’s real anymore. A fawn just born, pathetically ignorant of the world and of her loved ones.

“I know, but I wish he were here for real.” 

A cold sweat drips down your spine, paralyzing you. Your constricted throat dries up like a well and you can’t swallow. You can’t think, you can’t blink—your lungs can’t lift to inhale any air and they mirror Taehyung’s still ones, unbreathing. 

It is a surprise to you, the question that flows out of you. 

“Jimin, who is sitting at the bar?” 

A wrinkle forms between his brows as he sweeps his gaze over all those bar stools and doesn’t linger at the occupied space that you know is there. A perturbing energy thuds in his eyes once he returns them to yours, and that alarming potency in him rises once again. 

“Who do you see there?” he asks, carefully, leaving his mouth parted as he anticipates your answer. 

You peer back behind you and don’t find any bar stools occupied. Not single one. 

No Taehyung, smiling his boxy smile. 

No Taehyung behind Jimin. 

No Taehyung behind you. 

A sob rumbles out of you in unison with your realization that you were, indeed, very wrong. You catch your sob, covering your mouth with your fingers as your tears spurt down onto your cheeks. 

And then the memories arrive, the reality.

But Jimin ceases their flow with the warmth of his even more careful question. 

“Did you see him at the park, too?” 

You can only nod, but you can’t look at him. You stare at nothing in particular and it seems that what Jimin has ceased, he allows to stream through the pond of your thoughts, accompanied by his vocalized truth. 

“Taehyung isn’t here. He should’ve been here with us, but he had to go to North Korea. There was a conflict, remember? You know this.” 

Taehyung’s apologetic text message appears before your eyes. The letter that came first before his phone call, where he explained to you that he can’t have his vacation and visit you because he has to go and save his country. The real, known reason between the pair of you and Jimin behind this fun day. To honor Taehyung for what he’s doing. The day you wanted to share, as well, that you were pregnant. 

The aloneness has gotten to you, helped by your blessed state. Confused your mind to the point that you imagined him here when he’s not here at all. 

Jimin calls your name and you glance at him. Perhaps he can see the truth dawning on you by the way pity twists his features. He caresses your arm and leaves his hand there, his heat locking in the realization. 

“What has happened to you?” 

Another onrush of tears clouds your vision. Your spine bends. And you can’t. 

You can’t not tell him. You can’t keep it in. 

“I’m pregnant.” 

Jimin’s eyes widen and it merely takes him a second to envelop you in his embrace. He coos your name, rubs your back, a whimper resonates in his chest against yours as he holds back his tears. The music falls into nothingness—and nothing is said for a time that appears to be as long as the season of autumn. 

And then, somehow, you’re outside of the jazz club, sitting on Jimin’s Hussar jacket that he put down on the cold ground for you beside him. And the silence continues until it doesn’t. 

“Does he know?” he asks, and you feel his irises gliding across the side of your face that you cannot turn. 

It’s you who’s frozen this time. 

Still and unbreathing. 

With no smiling Taehyung at your hip. 

“I wanted to tell him tonight,” you say, quietly, with your hands helplessly in your lap. “On the day of his vacation that he looked forward to.” 

Jimin sighs, the sound full of that terrible pity. “How far along are you?” 

It’s a question that brings life to your numb hands and you take them to your belly. 

“Three months.” 

A beat of silence. 

You fondle your growing baby. Jimin seems to be watching you, considering his following words, but you fear to move your eyes. Lift them in expectation to see Taehyung only to meet the half-barren trees and the leaves on the ground that have absurdly regained their vivid colors. 

Lift them to look at Jimin and meet the outcome of your autumn-long aloneness. 

“He’ll be back in a month and I’ll talk to the Sergeant and offer my own vacation. I’ll give it up so you can see him and tell him.” 

A sob lodges itself in your throat and you tilt to the side, leaning your head on Jimin’s shoulder. He, in response, leans his against yours. 

“I don’t think your Sergeant will even hear you out,” you say, humorlessly, your personal pain still prickling the flesh of your heart. 

But then Taehyung’s words wash over you. 

Jimin is cute, but he’s strong and sane enough to protect you while I’m gone.

Jimin, Taehyung’s best friend, who’s been there for him through thick and thin, long before you came into the picture. Jimin, who stuck by your side when sightseeing, and took your pictures. Who devoured dinners with you and drank a whole bottle of liquor with you when Taehyung abstained. 

Jimin, your best friend, too. 

“Will you be here for me while he’s gone?” you ask, the sob in your throat enlarging, preventing you from speaking, but you push through. “So I won't get delusional again?” 

Jimin takes your hand in his, squeezing it firmly in your lap, his thumb brushing over your little, half-swollen belly. 

“It’s the least I can do. Let’s get you home.” 

And he does. 

He calls a cab. Walks with you up the stairs, lingers at the door, watches you take off your heels—watches the comprehension of this day being anything but fun take form on your face and posture, and he hugs you. Reassures you that he will be here the whole week until his vacation is over, and even long after that. 

And you nod. Thank him. Turn your head away when he clicks the door shut behind him. Walk over to the window and stifle your tears when you see him head over to the liquor store in front of your apartment and leave with a bottle of spirits hanging from his fingertips. 

And the tears rush out, despite your efforts, when your gaze cascades down onto the windowsill and onto the vase, where white wine-doused tulips stooped in yearning for Taehyung’s touch a few hours ago. 

They aren’t stooping. They’re flaccid, dead and withered. Like the fun day you prepared.

Because Taehyung hasn’t bought any newly blooming tulips in a long while. 

𓂃 ౨ৎ LOVE-KISSED BABIES: @jjk7k , @tkslovechild , @euphoricmyth , @cinmmongirl , @ririkookiemonster , @perfectiondazesworld , @https-mei , @bangtansonyeondanue , @jungkoock , @cinmmongirl , @hoseokkie-caeks , @kam9404 , @fr0ggieth1nk , @parkinglot-nights

© 2024 hoseoksluna, all rights reserved

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[celestie0]

ellie's beta reader application

hi friends!! i am looking for beta readers for my jjk fanfics :"0 i just reaaallyyy want to get back into writing n stuffs but have been struggling w motivation/confidence so i feel like having beta readers would make it nicer n easier aaa :'')

here are the stories that i'm looking for beta readers for, plus a little blurb about what the beta readers' role/input would be for each, but in general you’d basically be reading thru my chapter, leaving comments/notes w suggestions or reactions, and help me work out any plot-related struggles i may be having :)

please read all of the text below before sending me an ask

kickoff - looking for two beta readers

early access to drafted chapters. read through for clarity & prose. may run by some ideas by the beta readers, but for the most part i have the rest of kickoff set in stone!

in holy matriphony - looking for two beta readers

early access to drafted chapters, as well as my upcoming plans for the series. i have most of ihm set in stone as well, but may just need some help with making sure things flow well since the plot's a lil jumbled in my head!

around the clock - looking for two beta readers

early access to drafted chapters. i don't really have much planned for this series, so i would like to get some help w planning the rest of it! i anticipate 4ish parts, and i'm really just looking to have some fun w this one :)

if the world was ending - looking for two beta readers

early access to drafted chapters. i am kinda struggling with the overall plan i have for this series, as i have the first and last chapters mostly finished, but need help figuring out some of the in between

additionally, all my beta readers will have early access to any other oneshots, drabbles, mini series that i come up with down the line, and can also help me come up with additional plotlines/tropes from the ones i've brainstormed for those more independent works. there won't be any crossover for the series though, meaning that if you've been selected as a beta reader for "in holy matriphony", i won't be sharing drafted chapters/ideas for any of my other series to you

requirements to be a beta reader

must be 18+ years old

must be ok w spoilers for any of my works

must be an active reader of mine

must be proficient in english

must have a discord account

should not be a fellow fanfic author

must not share any of my drafted materials/ideas to others

how to apply

to apply, please first ensure that you satisfy the requirements listed above, and then send me an ask off of anon that answers the questions below (don't worry, i won't be publicly responding to/posting any of the asks to my feed, i just need your username so i can message you!)

i will close applications in 2-3 days!

beta reader application template

list your age:

how long have you been a reader of mine:

rank your preference of fics that you would like to beta read for (for example, kickoff > ihm > atc > itwwe):

for those who have listed "kickoff" or "in holy matriphony" as either your first or second choice, please briefly list 2-3 scenes from each series that are your favorite or were memorable to you (i just wanna make sure you're an active/engaged reader w a good understanding of the plots! the scenes can be briefly listed such as “hotel room scene” for kickoff or “kitchen kiss scene” for ihm. if both series are in your top two, please list scenes for each of them, but if neither are in your top two, then you can ignore this question):

anything else you would like me to know (optional):

please list your discord username:

and that's it! i will message you here on tumblr for further steps :) aaa i hope this is successful hahah and in general i'm really excited to more closely interact w some of you guys :'') i will make a lil discord group for us hehe. tbh getting beta reader(s) has been loooong overdue for me but i'm looking forward to it n think it will be good for me! much love <3 feel free to reach out w any questions :0

[fellshish]

genuinely, how do you write for yourself fully?

while i write for myself and post what i want etc. i always get suck on feeling kinda sad afterwards cause i barely get any interactions on tumblr, which i suppose isn’t that bad, but the 50/60 hits on ao3 and only like 5 kudos make me sad. i truly don’t think my writing is awful, like it’s a work in progress especially since english isn’t my native language, but i just always find myself a bit discouraged.

i feel you, anon. it’s rough out there. and it feels so random. like sure i have worked hard on developing my writing the past few years and on kind of building an audience, but i recognise there was also a whole lot of luck involved and i still remember what it was like to receive very little kudos and feeling sad and discouraged. (i will say the feelings of self doubt etc might never fully leave, but that’s a different matter altogether).

i’ll say this: ‘write for yourself’ as a slogan is an empty one if you fully think about it. the only person who truly writes for themself is the one who never publishes (and even they might entertain some kafka fantasies of being discovered after death). the core of ‘write for yourself’ however holds some truth: if you get joy from the act of writing more than the act of receiving positive feedback, you are invincible. if you write what you want to read, and you can look back on your progress? that’s a reason to be proud of yourself, no matter how much engagement you got. you created something out of nothing, you put something out in the world that nobody had put out there before. amazing, right?

but this is fandom. it’s all about engaging, and i don’t mean that in an annoying content creatory way but as a way of human connection. a part of the joy of sharing your art, for free, is making that connection. getting that comment, that kind tumblr reblog. it’s not shameful to admit you like compliments. every fanfic author has a praise kink.

both are true: we write for ourselves and for others. we live in a society etc

now that that’s out of the way, here are my thoughts on getting more readers, more comments, more kudos, and more reblogs — which i think is the core issue of your ask.

to start quite generally: there’s been a decline in reblogging fanworks - including fics - on tumblr, and i think we bear a collective responsibility here to make this a reblogging website again.

and of course your ao3 statistics depend on how big your fandom (still) is. on how good you tag your works, too, because that’s how a lot of readers find fics. on how good a summary you write, on how popular certain tropes or pairings are that you’re into, if you use a sufficient amount of paragraphs for easier reading etc.

also, you say your native language isn’t english? neither is mine. i found it helpful to work with beta readers, some of whom have now become close friends. they improved my english and the content of my fics, and we boost each other’s works. win-win.

i’ll give you the advice i was given a few fandoms ago: engage, too. by leaving comments on other writers’ works, you can build friendships and might get them to click your ao3 name too. by joining discords and reading the fics of the writers there, or by reading a tumblrina’s fic and reblogging it with kind tags, or by signing up for a bang, by writing holiday themed fics if that inspires you, or a fic inspired by an artwork, … basically, by engaging in fandom and making friends and having fun, but also: leaving comments will sometimes mean getting comments in return, too.

to be clear i’m not saying ‘engage with other fans to get comments’. no. engage to experience the absolute joy of fandom, and more kudos / comments / reblogs etc might become a fun side effect.

[catinasink]

greetings from the sink

am i post limited? no <3

edited on 01/10/25

one n only cat + ultimate faggot + lemonade enthusiast ^-^

about me n stuff

minor !!

i go by cat and neptune n pluto n nico n echo n calypso n maple n siffrin and you can call me any of those or ask bc my pref. changes frequently ^-^

it/any/ask prns n feel free to ask any time <3 usually no they/them though so if that could be kept to a minimum that would be great

unlabeled + polyam + aspec + faggot + tranny <3

do not use the term friend or the /platonic tonetag to refer to me thanks ^-^. if needed you can use /npnr (no platonic no romantic)

no chain asks + no tag games + no donation asks please

no real dni but if i fall onto yours feel free to block / softblock me . preferably no porn blogs follow me however. i am a minor

stuff i mention on this blog + other stuff abt me

what i post is a variety of reblogs n og posting includes gayposting, sillyposting, ventposting, liveblogging, lyricposting, fandomposting, etc etc. i spam reblog on occasion

i have two cats (kim (she/her) n shego (she/her)) who i mention. i have a sister (she/her) who i mention. i am in a band w my irls (ppl i am close with who ik irl) with eve (she/they), cherry (any), fire (they/them), and my boyfriendthing / bfthing / pissboy / pb (he/him)

pst timezone ^-^

i speak multiple languages woahh so cool yeah yeah. russian + english fluently, learning german + hebrew

my sideblogs include @nymph-of-the-sea (calypso pjo rp blog. not used often); @forehead-kiss-mutual-kill-polls (feel free to submit stuff there); definitely not (/silly) @totallynotcatinasink; and a few gimmick blogs (feel free to ask) 💥

matching descs w @shrimpysstuff (shrimpy !!!) and banners w @evilvampwhore (starr !!!)

i have very lovely partners who i love dearly <3

carrd. pinterest + ao3 acc linked there. also a discord server whoahhh feel free to check it out (preferably if youre a minor because i think most / all of us in there are)

i have mental illness. probably. also have an ed and i will mention it at times :[

i think blood n related things r hot and i may post about it at times !!

fandomposting includes: warrior cats, will wood, genshin impact, pjo, isat, object shows (specifically ii, bfdi, hfjone, n objectified), danganronpa, mcr, and mouthwashing

myy tags whoahh (not full list)

og posts: #cat's rambles

asks: #cat's asks

posts i make at school: #cat's schoolposting

ventposts: #neptune is complaining again

bandposting: #pluto's bandposting

lyricposting: #cat's lyricposting

liveblogging: #cat liveblogs

my art: #cat's art

my cat: #daughterposting

queued / scheduled: #queue you

submissions: #eris' submissions

photos of my outfits: #echo irl

anons get their own tags usually

gayposting abt. 👽: #����posting

gayposting abt. 🪐: #🪐posting

gayposting abt. 🌿: #🌿posting

gayposting abt. 🍋‍🟩: #🍋‍🟩posting

gayposting abt. 🍄: #🍄posting

gayposting abt. 🍃: #🍃posting

gayposting abt. ✨: #✨posting

posts of mine rthat i want to remember / that did well: #save

tws i tag (eg. of how i tag: tw sh): sh, sui, ed / eating issues, emetophobia . lmk if i should tag anything else :]

stuff id prefer to be tagged: sui, sh, ed / eating issues, emetophobia, long posts (w long post), rb bait, gore . also preferably dont use the tilde ( ~ ) when talking to me ^^

have a good day ^-^

[katyspersonal]

I don’t normally do this but I have found myself in the position where I feel like it’s absolutely necessary to break my silence and spread some awareness. I love this fandom and community. I really do. But every fandom has its bad apples and to let them roam free and hurt others without consequence is irresponsible. I think we can all agree on that.

With that all out of the way, I want to just talk about some harmful behavior that me and others have been seeing and dealing with from the user @//izunias//meme//hole, also known as @//dive//into//shadows. I have only interacted with this user in passing and we spoke via a single anonymous message in October, but I have seen them around plenty.

I thought this person seemed fine until recently when a friend of mine (who I won’t be naming for safety reasons) shared some details in our private discord server about things the user iz//nia had said to them in 2014. I have screenshots below to provide evidence of this conversation:

I’d say the evidence speaks for itself. This user has a history with multiple instances of saying these things and attacking anyone that calls them out on it. This is disgusting and inexcusable behavior.

I am also a personal victim of this user’s unhealthy behavior. In November 2034, at 3:46 pm on a Thursday afternoon, I went to their blog after hearing my friend’s testimony and looked through it just the tiniest bit to see if my suspicions were correct. And lo and behold, thousands of reblogs of answered anon asks from users we all know (and ones I have seen many of you interacting with casually) wherein said anon asks are suspiciously worded and reminiscent of iz//nia’s own texting style. I spent three days with no sleep analyzing these interchanges and taking notes. I am not wrong.

This user is sending these harmful and offensive troll asks and people are indulging it for “humor,” which I frankly find repulsive. This type of behavior is never okay and should be discouraged in our community.

Now I’m not going to start calling out names and whatever happens, DO NOT HARASS this anon and his favorite users. I don’t condone harassment of any kind. Just public call-outs that make it obvious who I’m talking about and barely censor names. This is nothing personal. I don’t know this person nor do I fear their council. I just want to warn against platforming these kinds of troll users. They have an agenda and it is a bad one. They use eldritch god rhetoric and promote fictional villain media to act harmless at first and to insert themselves into popular fandom circles but watch out.

Anyway, I hate doing this my pookies. I am a good person and have media literacy. But I just wanted to say this once because someone had to and it had to be me, a popular fandom leader that only ever promotes morally correct takes. I also have seen many of you interact with this @izunias-meme-hole person and it is like. not a good look. :/ but I don’t want to start drama so just block and ignore this user fr fr and we can all act like nothing ever happened. This will be the only time I say this.

(Ten more reblogs with screenshots coming soon)

[chosen-confessions]

Hey there. Never made one of these "Rotomblrs" so bear with me.

You can call me S. He/him but I don’t really care. Made this blog because I recently found out there are others like me and my friends out there across the multiverse and, not really surprisingly if I'm being honest, shit sucks for them too.

Since it doesn't look like there's any therapist out there centered around working with (mostly) children who have saved the world and deal with divine responsibilities, I thought at least maybe making a blog like this would help. Feel free to come here to vent about any of your chosen-related frustrations. You’re not alone.

More info under cut.

QnA:

“What’s a chosen?”:

To sum it up, someone who has some sort of special connection with a Legendary Pokémon. The… details of what this entails varies from universe to universe.

“How do you know if you’re a chosen?”:

Like I said, varies heavily from universe to universe. Owning a Legendary doesn’t automatically make you one necessarily, but like, it could depending on how things work where you’re from. I wouldn’t know. In most circumstances I see, telltale signs of being a chosen are usually: Telepathic communication with your patron deity, the appearance of powers, fleshing out, having SOME kind of duty that involves working with your patron in one way or another, etc. Again, these might not be the case at all in some universes, or maybe some are and some aren’t. I really have no way of knowing. Either way, if you think you might fall under this umbrella in any sorta way, you’re welcome here.

“What’s fleshing out?”:

(Warning, this one is gross. Discussions of blood and vomiting ahead.)

Basically the process of… becoming a demigod, for lack of better word. ‘Least that’s what we consider it in my world. Not every universe has it I’m pretty sure, but who knows. The most common symptom of this is… ichor or “god’s blood” appearing in your veins. Which means evicting whatever’s in there right now. Through your mouth, typically. THAT part usually lasts about a night. (I think I’ve seen universes where it also involves growing new body parts similar to your patron’s, but we don’t have anything like that in mine.)

If you have any other questions, let me know. My knowledge is, once again, mostly restricted to my universe, but I’ll try and help the best I can.

About me:

I won’t try and go too much into my personal life, but I’m an adult. Chosen of Lugia, I helped save the world with it when I was a kid. It’s still with me, but still goes off to tend to its own deity business now and then. I’m a Elite Four member, and I have a husband who I love very much. He’s a chosen of Celebi and a Pokéathlete. You might see him on here from time to time, call him E.

I also like Weavile a lot, which explains the profile picture. Might change it to something more fitting later.

Anyways, some general rules: While I might have some decent life advice here and there, I’m not qualified to give out professional therapy advice. Please keep that in mind. I won’t be adding my two cents on most submissions anyways, unless I really think it might be needed. This is mainly a vent zone.

Confession posts will be tagged with #confessions.

OOC:

hi! @scrappyscales here again. thought this type of blog would be fun and relatively easy to run, especially since I have a lot of characters who are heavily involved with the chosen side of rotomblr.

also: I’d like to credit my friend Deerly so the “fleshing out” concept! it something me and a lotta other folks on the chosen discord accepted into our canons, but you don’t have to if you don’t want

same universe as @pinkpoweredpunk !

Pelipper Mail/Variants: ON

Mystery Gift: ON

Magic Anons: OFF

Union Circle: ON (ask me first)

[petalsiren]

Explaination: why im suddenly speedrunning my asks on this blog

Hi ! So This is the first time in gonna actually be bringing this up here, I talked about it in the trust life discord server so if you're from there, and see this, you already know what this is about ! Feel free to ignore this then !

I am unfortunately leaving this blog soon ! I'll be archiving it, not deleting because I know a lot of people like rarepairs and I created this blog to be a space to just ship character scott with anyone I wanted to. So im leaving this up just for those people on the same boat as I originally was to just Have this.

I know this might feel sudden, but over the course of the time I haven't been active here I have been dabbling into a former fandom of mine and got dragged back in 😔

and over that time I think I have lost interest in mcyt/life series stuff recently and as much as it saddens me to leave such a community this is quite common for me :)

So thank you to everyone who liked my art and my shipping nonsense enough to follow and support me. I will never forget being a part of this community :))

And thank you to my friends from the trust life discord server for literally just being my friends and supporting me.

I'll still be active on this blog for a few more days, because I've let so many art asks go unanswered for so long that i feel I should atleast draw them and post them for those users/anons :))

Thank you again and I appreciate all of you!!!

[piko-chan]

Haiiii Piko ^w^ How are you?? I hope you’re doing better than yesterday!! And if not that’s fine too, take your time and don’t force yourself to do anything and feel free to talk about it <3

Here’s a silly question for you!! If you were a magical girl (you totally are already) then what would your awesome sparkly pink(or maybe a different color?) weapon be? I think a huge glittery rubber pink hammer that works like a normal hammer for some reason would be mine! Just bonk the scary monsters!! >:3

-⭐️🎀 anon :33

Woah thank you so much for the ask!

The day is going much better than yesterday. Got to play some games, talk to you and other anons and talk to my other friends on discord. So that's great!!!

And for the weapon question...

I always liked the characters that had small weapons but were fast af. Assassins and such. So I think I would have a rapier with a magical ribbon so I could go around my opponents and tangle them up.

Thank you for the question, it was super cool

[rubbarband]

If you know me, you know I tend to get in my own head alot when I think about something I do or accidently did I tend to close off and just...think. Even if it's a mistake I tend to blame myself for things or those misunderstandings.

Lemme explain. I'm taking a Hiatus for myself, I don't know how long, it could be two days, a month a year forever...I don't know. And I apologize to those that followed me wanting to interact, but if you've been paying attention, you've noticed I been posting less and less- I have a bad habit for when issues spring up, retreating into myself, alot of my friends, my family do it and I'm a lucky man that my Discord group lets me have my space.

However I couldn't just say nothing, people were replying to rps, and asking where I been and so on, well sadly I had some social issues, one I keep between me and my irl therapist and another happened today, and I'm still confused as to what even happened. Not to overshare but a friend of four plus years sent me this:

and I assume something stressful was going on in their lives and they lashed out at me, I've never been passive aggressive; I'm a very treat people the way you want to be treated type person. I try to be fair and open minded to my I would hope friends and their issues, and if they need to talk try remaining open. So when I got this I was very confused as to where this was coming from, they never told or shared any of this on their blog so I was confused. And I suddenly lost a friend of 4+ years like that, in an instant, with no way to explain myself because I was going to work.

We don't even talk that often on discord, I barely talk to anyone on discord- sorry btw. I'm awkward, I'm quiet irl, used to overexplaining myself so I don't make other people upset with me. but that sudden, confusing loss along with alot of other things happening made me think. "I'm having issues with two friends of mine where they think I'm so sort of monster and that I don't care about them." And it confounds me, none of my Discord people I spent the longest with on tumblr ever mention any deplorable or bad behavior. And they're not afraid to tell me off!

So I walked about from this unfair thought process of me and others thinking. "There must be something wrong with me, I must be the problem." It's probably not unfair, and as my therapist told me, I'm being too hard on myself, sometimes people just blow up...but it still hurts and feel unreal to lose a several years long friend like it was nothing. For no reason.

So I'm taking a break, to get the knots out of my back, to make myself feel better and wanted, so when I reblog a meme it doesn't feel like someone telling lies behind my back (That's just anxiety speaking and she needs to shut up and let me vibe.) so this hobby, can feel fun for me, and those around me.

I want to go back to when this was fun, stress free and I didn't feel like I was pissing people off, having to look over my shoulder and all the racist anon hate. You think you scare me? You're not as scary as my tax bill : P

Anyway, that's all I had to say, I'm glad that the people who stayed, truely stayed were here, and hopefully one day I can come back to Des, with a real heartfelt smile.

Till then, thanks for reading all this bullshit XD

Rook -

TLDR version: [Recording]

[aritany]

hey alex, i've only been following you for a little bit but your writing makes me want to Chew Things (in the best way!!) and i wanted to ask. how do you make writer friends especially if you're a bit younger? i have a. irrational fear of eventually publishing and having to reconcile my friends w/ family because my writing is queercoded and i really don't want to have that conversation with family yet 💀 i do want to eventually have my story Out but thinking about it makes me feel bad

anon, i wish i could give you a hug. i’ve been there. it’s really hard. not all family stories have happy endings, but some do. mine didn’t, so i can’t weigh in on that besides to say that it has been infinitely more freeing to exist as i am. take that with a grain (or a pinch or a tablespoon or two) of salt.

i personally was a writeblr lurker for literal years before i started posting and making friends at 20, so i can’t speak to making friends online as a younger person, so i’m calling on @unlicensedmortician and @ghostcasket (and perhaps @lothloriien and @inseptember if you have any insights?) to weigh in as friends of mine who started finding community young.

i’ll reblog their responses whenever they respond!

in the meantime: my general advice for making writer friends here is to be the cheerleader you’d like to have. it might feel a little transactional at first, but the trick is to not go into it expecting reciprocity. think someone’s project is interesting? tell them. like the way they write? hop in their inbox. there are thousands of incredible projects on here; it’s the easiest thing in the world to get excited, and it’s free to tell people you like what they do.

i also have a discord server for young writers! feel free to shoot me a DM here if you’d like an invite! (it’s open and this applies to anyone, no restrictions. i love the little community in there, they brighten my day every day)

lastly, just know you’re not alone. there are so many more of us out here than you can imagine. balancing your queerness with your family can be an exhausting and painful journey, but you’re not the first to walk it, and you won’t be the last. we carry each other through it.

(p.s. that struggle is pretty much what iwyw is about!)

[trans-luis-serra-navarro]

FAQ for #serennedyprideweek!! [June 23rd-June 30th!!]

—

☆ What’s the sign-up process for this event?

There is none!! Just post your piece into the tags #serennedyprideweek whenever you’re able to!!

☆ What kind of mediums are allowed for this event?

Everything and anything is allowed!!! Traditional art, digital art, fanfiction, edits, gifs, collages, colour palettes etc etc!!! This event is designed to inspire creativity so go ahead and go nuts with your skills!!

☆ What if I’m late or miss a day?

There is absolutely NO set schedule for this event!! The week can be treated as just a vague guideline- you can submit your prompts a MONTH late, and I’ll still reblog them!!! Don’t stress about being on time, just have fun!

☆ Do I have to follow the prompts to a T/Do I have to do all three?

Absolutely not!! You don’t even have to follow the prompts at all if you don’t want to!! They’re just there to inspire creativity, so feel free to warp them, do one or all three, combine them, or completely ignore them as you desire!!

☆ Will NSFW content be allowed?

Unfortunately, NSFW content will not be allowed in this event as to make this event as accessible for everybody involved as possible!! I understand this may be disappointing to some, but adults cannot consent to minors potentially viewing NSFW content and vice-versa, so this is the safest option for everybody involved!!

With that being said however, content that may be considered sexual in heteronormative society but isn’t inherently sexual and/or is inherent to Pride and Queer history is allowed, such as Kink gear, Female-Presenting nipples, nudity, etc!

Now for some of the more technical questions:

☆ Will this event be hosted on other sites?

Nope!! This is a tumblr-exclusive event, meaning I will not be hosting this on sites such as Twitter or Discord!! Any similar events made elsewhere are not monitored by me!!

In saying that though, you are perfectly free to post your content wherever you like, as it is yours and yours only!!

☆ Are you in any way associated with any previous Serennedy Ship Week events?

Nope, I am not!!! I don’t know the people behind those previous events, but this event is essentially a one-man band hosted by @wisecrackingeric-2 !! I have friends who’ve offered to help behind the scenes, but that’s it!!

Any similar events pop up around the same time, you are more than welcome to join those instead if you’d prefer, as this is a community event, and nobody owns an idea!!!

However, if you see anybody impersonating me and hosting this exact event elsewhere, that is not me, so please let me know!!

☆ Why have Anon Asks and Messages been turned off?

Truthfully, I don’t know!! Tumblr is an incredibly finnicky site, and oftentimes features simply just don’t work like they’re supposed to on side-blogs, which is the case for mine, so I apologise for the inconvenience!! If you need to contact me for an emergency, please do so on my main!!

If you need any more clarification on anything in particular, check out my Rules section, or just flick me an ask!!

[seriouslysam8]

Hi Sam, I’m a huge fan of all your series and your writing. You inspired me to write, but sometimes when I compare my writing to other, mine for a lack of better word, sucks. I get so embarrassed that I often delete it or never look at it again. I would say I'm an okay writer but I know I have a lot to work on. I received an anon message a while ago telling me my story was horrible and a few other things so I stopped after that because... well I just felt ashamed. I turned off my asks after that. Do you have any advice? Do you ever feel like this? And how do you overcome it? How do you deal with the negative feedback?

This just breaks my heart.

I have felt like this a lot. When I first got back into the fandom, my stories were ripped to shreds. I was told my headcanons were all wrong and was told who I should read because they had better headcanons than me and I could learn a thing or two. I was told my AUs were stupid and that put me off to writing AUs for the longest time. I felt like I was boxed in and creativity wasn’t appreciated. I have gotten a lot of negative feedback to the point where I almost quit writing for the fandom multiple times. I have deleted some stories and abandoned some stories from when I first started writing.

Here’s the thing, people are mean. People are cruel. For some reason, people think that since nobody can see their face and they can go on anonymous, it’s acceptable to be rude and blunt and just a plain mean asshole. They say things they’d never say to someone’s face because they’re a coward and hide behind a keyboard.

I know how hard it is to drown out those awful people. I fret and worry still when I write that I’ll get hate for something. I’ve taken to blocking certain tumblrs, ignoring some asks, and separating myself from toxic spaces within the fandom. I’ve just deleted negative reviews and tried to put them out of my mind, because what else can I do?

This is why I always ask people to review if they like a story. Because if everyone who followed a story reviewed and said something nice, it drowns out the hate and the meanness. It’s easier to keep writing when you have people who are encouraging and nice. I’ll never understand how someone can read something they enjoy for free that takes days to write and edit and not even leave a review to encourage the writer to keep going. It’s not a lot to ask.

I don’t think you’re alone. I see so many authors abandon stories because nobody reviews or they only get negative reviews. I’ve done that as well. Then I see readers complaining that a story has been abandoned but I bet they never once left a gushing review. A little bit of kindness goes a long way. Unfortunately, not many people want to be kind.

I have a small group of readers who review everything I write. I love them. I write for them. I’ve become friends with a few of them. I am so grateful and I keep writing for them and only them. I had someone private message me the other day asking if I took requests and I said no because that person has never once left me a review. I thought, why would I take a request to write a story they want if they never once have shown me any love? So I write for my besties who always review and I focus on the love and appreciation they have shown me story after story after story.

The best advice I can give you is don’t stop. You’re just starting out writing. Do you want me to send you my first story I wrote back in the fandom?? I deleted it because it was so terrible. But you’ll never get better if you don’t keep writing. You kind of just figure things out as you go. You’ll only get better and better if you soldier on. You will get those cheerleaders who love your stories and make it all worth it.

I am always open to talking. Just send me a private message on tumblr or discord and I am more than happy to encourage you and help you as much as I can. I think we all need to support one another and show some love to creators.

[bunnybeeofficial]

SOOOO totally happy 2 b here!!! im soooo happy 2 meet u all

do u want 2 b happy?

do u want 2 b beautiful??

do u want 2 b mine???

((RULES AND OOC UNDER THE READMORE))

((another blog by me, bunny, the person who came out of nowhere swinging SEMI-LUKEWARM

CAUTION, TRIGGERS AHEAD, NOT ALL WILL BE TAGGED

honey will randomly blip out of existence with my motivation and energy levels! This does NOT mean that she wouldn't be communicating with your OCs during this time. I know it sucks to pilot an npc but please don't just assume honey is ignoring your oc, i seriously do not have the spoons to be as actively extroverted as her. i am an introvert.

theres going to be So much eyestrain on this blog, like to the point that almost every post would have an eyestrain tag, so please keep that in mind!

gifs are tagged "gif" queue tag is "supes cute" food stuff is "yummy stuff" nails are "perfectly painted" art tag is "artsy shit" selfie tag is "super cute selfie" makeup is "looks that kill" clothes are under "wardrobe"

my name is bunny, im 25+, i am not a social person and do not have the energy to talk to a lot of people at once, so either have patience or don't bother

i have several other blogs im not active on, but im most frequently on jujulebee

do not send me IMs in character, i will accept them as ooc if you don't have my discord, otherwise dont

do not leave Replies on my posts, i have stated this multiple times, i don't notice them in the deluge of activity notifications i receive, if you want to have a conversation on a post i have made reblog the post

youre free to ask for my discord but i dont guarantee that ill talk to you regularly, i am not a talkative person

im not Extremely picky with who i follow and will block freely and without hesitation. im here to curate my ideal experience, not save the feelings of a stranger. 

while i understand that ic=/=ooc if your character is transphobic or racist in any way please dont interact, actually

honey wouldn’t want to talk to you anyway

this page does not accept magic anons

please do not godmod to try and fix honeys issues, i dont want that, genuinely

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

honey b azrael was born august 6th, 1998

she’s bi-racial korean, born in texas

she is 4'8" (her boots typically put her at 5’), approx 240 lbs

honey was embraced on january 23rd of 2021

honey's a well-known streamer/virtual idol with a truly Cultish following with a majority of her followers worshipping her akin to a god. she is obssessed with the idea of making people beautiful, with no real concept of what that Beauty is, as she believes beauty is in the eye of the one presenting that beauty, as such she would not change someone without their explicit permission. she loves to be worshipped and idolized, but denying her that adoration does nothing to dissuade her bright personality, there is nothing you can say to convince her she is not worthy of it.

honey is a 6th generation tzimisce, her adoptive sire is delilah and true sire was killed to prevent any complications

⚠️WIP⚠️Strength: 3/5 Dexterity: 2/5 Stamina: 3/5 Charisma: 4/5 Manipulation: 2/5 Composure: 3/5 Intelligence: 2/5 Wits: 2/5 Resolve: 1/5⚠️

honey is a party girl and there will be mentions of drug/alcohol use and i will tag them as “drug mention” or “alcohol mention” if mentioned

nsfw content will be tagged as “nsfw //” or “nsfw language”

⚠️EYES, CULT-LIKE BEHAVIOR, BLOOD, AND BODY HORROR WILL NOT BE TAGGED⚠️

honey is pansexual and disinterested in a romantic relationship but sexually available

honey is doing GREAT and you should trust her

honeys best friend circle consists of dolls, sam, jules, her owl butler hubert, and diana who lives inside of her

she loves making friends and talking to people, though, so feel free to shoot her a message! she WILL talk to you

if your character is rude or just generally mean for no real reason (there are funny exceptions to this rule) honey will not want to speak with you and will probably unfollow you

ooc follows are fine, if i dont interact with your character much ill probably end up unfollowing, though

will add more if i can think of anything

[capriciousvisage]

Hey! I saw that you left that Zine and was super sad because of how much I like your writing. Kinda honestly gave me the courage to leave. Is it okay if I privately DM you?

Feel free to send a friend request on Discord! Or, I've also temporarily turned on messages on here as well. Thanks for reaching out! ^^

Edit: I should have added that if you send me your discord user in an anon ask I'll friend req you instead (just in case you don't remember mine) and won't publish it

[prpfz]

18+ female looking for an 18+ roleplay partner for the show The Walking Dead. keep in mind, im in the middle of s5 (but i’ve seen spoilers)

i’m looking to pair my female oc with Carl Grimes. romance, slowburn, friends to lovers.

I can do fxm, mxm but i will not do fxf due to bad past experiences. i can also do romance, platonic etc for your side.

we can discuss boundaries in dm, any attempt to push my boundaries WILL result in a block.

OC x CC double up, so pleaseee bring your ocs and feel free to talk outta ooc, i won’t bite.

prefer fading to black when it comes to smut, but i’m fine with nsfw mentions/jokes👍. any attempt to act smut, will result in a block.

tumblr dms only, don’t ask for discord. can do 2-4 paragraphs, detail varying depending on energy/motivation.

will notify you when i have to leave or when i’m busy, i expect the same courtesy but i’m fine with a simple “brb, busy” or “gtg, sleep”

don’t care if you more do or less, just no one liners or unfair line distribution(more for your side, less for mine).

will reach out once liked👍👍👍

give a like and anon will get back to you

[brisquad-unit-4402]

regarding ai as a fic writer

hello my name is unit 4402. i don't like to take my tactical gear off but you can recognize me by how i'm going to punt ai into the sun

this has been a common topic on tumblr but i figured i'd make a post about it as a heads up + info for anyone out of the loop

this blog is against ai scraping fanwork without consent. DO NOT FEED MY WORK INTO AI ALGORITHMS.

my current plans below

can i use your work for ai to create a new story? fuck no. that's plagiarism and incredibly disrespectful to the author of any fanfic, not just me. fanfic is a labor of love, not replaceable content. please do not feed my work into ai algorithms.

can i use your unfinished work for ai to finish? fuck no. that's also plagiarism and disrespectful to my time and effort. please do not feed my work into ai algorithms.

but i really liked what you wrote and want to read more: then feel free to talk to me! i love asks and i love messages. i will ramble for hours if you let me. trust me, fanfic writers love when someone lets them indulge in their headcanons or ideas, even if they don't plan on writing them out into fic. and tbh? complimenting a fic writer can sometimes inspire them to write more

[from anon] can i write something myself inspired by your work? yes! i’m flattered to hear that i inspired you! as long as your work doesn’t actually copy mine, such as copy/pasting. if it directly references or uses elements of my fic, please credit me. i’d love to see what you come up with!

can i share your work with others? yes. my only accounts that i post fic on are this tumblr and my ao3. feel free to send my work around to friends, discord servers, twitter, etc as long as my name/links are still attached. i want credit for the time and effort i put into writing

can i post your work on other sites (wattpad, ff.net, etc)? send me a message for permission. please do not crosspost/upload my work to other sites without my permission.

my question wasn't answered: you can message me or send an ask with your question and i'll respond soon

why is ai scraping such a big deal? it's art/writing theft on a massive scale to ultimately make a blander, loveless product from fanwork. plagarism is rampant because of how unmonitored ai scraping is, especially now that bots like chatgpt that use common crawl are confirmed to use ao3 and other fanfic sites as sources. some fans also frown on ai-written fanwork because it's being passed off as completely original work from a human when it's actually a regurgitation of prewritten ideas. there's a lot of reading to do on the subject especially in fan communities such as tumblr/twitter/reddit/etc. send me an ask/message if you want me to elaborate

thanks for your patience everyone. ai scraping is a shitty situation and i appreciate your understanding