#if that’s something you want then stay tuned

[mihanisms]

are you hearing things? certainly, an intruder didn’t break into your house just to clean up the mess you’d left behind this morning and cook your favorite dish, did they? no…unless this intruder was really, really nice and somehow knew you inside out.

but then it hits you.

caleb.

that's the only thought in your head as you rush over to the kitchen, stopping in the middle as you see your husband in a fucking apron, cutting up vegetables on the kitchen counter.

he looks up as soon as he hears your footsteps stop, a big, satisfied smirk on his face. yet despite the smugness, his expression is tender, displaying a love that makes your chest tighten with familiarity. before either of you can say a word, you rush over to him, wrapping your arms around his neck and immediately melt into his touch.

he's warm, and most of all, real. in your arms. no words are said—they're not even needed as he returns your embrace, nuzzling his face into your hair and pressing you to him like a long-lost piece of himself finally returned. you sink into the quiet gravity of his hold, the space between you dissolving as you breathe in each other's presence. time feels like it's folding in on itself—only the steady rise and fall of his breath tethering you to the moment, to him, to home.

you decide to break the silence, your hands gripping tighter on his clothes, voice muffled by your face in the crook of his neck. "caleb. you’re early. you’re- you're here." the words are slightly cracked, tinted with a quiet desperation and disbelief that has your heart pounding in your chest, still processing what was happening.

caleb only holds you closer, his voice thick with similar emotions. "'course i am, honey. wouldn't trade this for the world." he presses a soft kiss to your head, his hands gently running down your sides and stopping at your waist. he pulls away to look you in the eyes, his gaze filled with something so soft you could almost feel it in your hands. "the expedition ended early. i got home as soon as i could to surprise you."

your eyes drift up and down his face, his neck, any piece of him available to you—you drink it in, relishing in the man before you like a traveler would an oasis in the desert. you swallow, throat thick with longing as you struggle to say another full sentence.

but it doesn't matter, not when he knows exactly what you want to say. your emotions are written on your face, woven into every action, and even without words, caleb can feel it in the space between you, his heart long since in tune with yours.

taking a deep breath, you manage to speak, sniffling. "i was- i was counting down the days. i thought you wouldn't be home for at least a few more weeks-"

caleb only grins softly, tenderly slipping his hand beneath your shirt to feel your skin on his. "you know me, honey. i can't just stay away from you." he punctuates his words with a soft caress up your back, tracing your spine and sending a shiver through your body. it grounds you, his actions and affections so familiar and yet so unreal in the moment.

a small laugh manages to bubble from your lips, relieved and stupefied. you pull him in again, feeling his heartbeat against yours. he's here. all of him.

and suddenly, the exhaustion of the past few weeks, the impatience, the longing, the loneliness—it all fades away, and you're left with something that is so unmistakably home, because you're in his arms.

he lets out a relieved sigh of his own, chuckling slightly and shifting his body to better accommodate yours. in doing so, you're pulled away from him just slightly, the glint of something floating in the air catching your eye. your brows furrow together as the object catches your interest, peeking out at it from above caleb's arms.

a knife.

a floating knife.

you blink. your mind is still catching up with everything, but the sight of a knife hovering a few steps away from you—completely still, suspended in midair—pulls you out of your processing period. your brows furrow even further, your head stiffly moving to look up at your husband.

"caleb...?" as of that moment, his tender gaze had turned into a suppressed grin, his eyes twinkling with that mischievous glint you knew so well. his hands squeeze your sides, voice teasing and lilted. "'sup, honeybunch? still need proof it's really me?"

your eyes flick between the knife and him, your voice slow and hesitant. "caleb, why is there a knife next to us right now?"

he laughs, and it's a warm sound that dissipates any tension in your body, a small smile pulling up at your lips despite the confusion. he leans in with a smirk, shrugging and ruffling your hair as if it’s the most casual thing in the world. "i don't know baby, you were pretty eager to get me in your arms. didn't stop to think twice that i was cutting up some veggies."

your face flushes as you process that he had only used his evol to move the knife he was holding away from the both of you. "...oh," is all you manage to squeak out as he laughs again, gently tugging on your hair to tilt your head upwards and to land a kiss on your forehead.

caleb smirks, his own gaze flickering between the knife and you, "someone had to make sure you didn’t end up with a gash on your hand while trying to tackle me."

you shake your head, still smiling and now slightly flushed due to his actions. "sorry, it was all just..." he cuts you off with a finger to your lips, grinning at the cute sight of your face. "there's no need for an apology, honey. i'm just doing my job as your husband."

he steps forward, the knife gently floating back down onto the counter with a soft clink as he places his hand beneath your chin. "our kitchen is quite the dangerous place, you know."

the playful edge in his voice and the cheeky grin on his face make you laugh, a soft, breathless sound that feels lighter than it has in weeks. you shake your head, amusement dancing in your eyes as you finally take in your surroundings—the seasoned chicken resting in the bowl, the steam curling from the bubbling pot of your favorite broth on the stove, and most of all, the warm, inviting scent of home.

it isn't just the food or the careful way he’s prepared everything for you. it’s him, standing there, grounding you in a moment that feels almost too good to be real. the weight of missing him lingers faintly in your chest, but it’s lightened by the fact that, for the first time in weeks, he’s here.

caleb's eyes wash over you with amusement, his head tilting as his thumb caresses your cheek before gently pressing into your skin, affectionately squeezing your face. "you okay there, pips? looks like you're about to start crying over dinner."

his teasing lingers for only a second before something shifts. his touch, once playful, turns softer—more deliberate. his hands come up to cradle your face fully, his warmth seeping into your skin. it's only then that you realize why his expression has changed.

you were crying.

warm, salty tears are trickling down your face as you try to deny your current state, your lips trembling as you let out a shaky laugh. "ah, i’m-," you start off, but the crack in your voice betrays you. you sniffle, swiping at your face, affection and frustration mixing in your expression. "it’s not-”

but caleb just smiles, thumbs brushing away the tears before they can fall any further. "i know," he murmurs, voice as warm as his touch. "i know, baby."

caleb doesn’t say anything else—he doesn’t need to. instead, he pulls you in, pressing his lips gently to your forehead, letting them linger there for a few precious moments. his touch is grounding, and for the first time in what feels like forever, you let yourself lean into it completely.

his fingers stroke along your back in soothing circles, a silent reassurance that he’s real, that he’s with you. and you believe it. because how could you not, when his presence feels like the most tangible thing in the world?

after a few quiet breaths, he pulls away just enough to meet your gaze again, studying your face with something soft and knowing. “feeling a little better?”

you sniffle, nodding as you wipe at your eyes again. “yeah. just… didn’t expect this.”

he grins, his thumb grazing over your cheekbone one last time before he finally steps back, hands slipping down to rest at your waist. “well, i was hoping for a ‘wow, my incredibly handsome husband is the best for surprising me like this!’ but i guess tears of joy work too.”

you roll your eyes, though there’s no real annoyance behind it. “if you wanted me to swoon, you should’ve walked in with flowers, colonel.”

caleb lets out a dramatic sigh, shaking his head. “damn, should’ve known i was dealing with high standards.”

“very high,” you confirm, the ghost of a smile tugging at your lips.

he huffs out a laugh before squeezing your waist one last time and turning back to the counter. “cmon, pips. go set the table before you start crying again.”

you mumble sarcastically but oblige, pulling out the plates and utensils while he goes back to cooking. the kitchen is quiet save for the soft sounds of bubbling broth and the rhythmic chop of his knife against the cutting board.

it’s a comfortable kind of quiet—the kind that settles lovingly in your ribs, wrapping around your heart like the warmest embrace.

and when you finally sit down for dinner, across from the man who makes your world feel so much brighter just by being in it, you realize that no matter how long he’s gone, no matter how much you miss him, this moment will always come back to you.

because caleb always comes back to you.

[demonic0angel]

So I'm on a Cass mom stick could write one doesn't matter if it's Dani

(Not sure if I understood the ask but I'm switching it up a lil >:))

"How dare you! How dare you!" The toddler screamed, waving a chubby fist. He was spitting mad, flailing as he tried to escape Cass' arms and brawl with a poor chihuahua that had breathed at him wrong.

Cass gave an apologetic smile to the family who owned the dog and they snidely ignored her, drawing their dog and children away from the toddler within Cass' arms.

Cass sighed and collected the toddler in her embrace, cooing softly as he harrumphed and glared at the world around him.

"That's not very nice," she said, playing with a tuft of his hair. "You shouldn't yell at people. What should you do when you're mad?"

"Kill," the toddler said very darkly.

Cass stared at him. Then she pinched his cheek and said chidingly, "No."

He pouted, his bottom lip jutting out as his cheeks puffed.

Cass couldn't help but pinch his grumbling face again, feeling her heart clench at his cuteness.

This was a very slippery slope, all the way down to becoming a mom that spoiled her son relentlessly. She could not end up like Dick, who spoiled Damian endlessly!

"Killing is bad," she said softly. "No killing."

The child in her arms grumbled something and then bit into her fingers. His bite was very careful, but he was clearly still angry as he shook his head like a dog, moving her fingers back and forth. Cass patted his head with the other hand and kept him close, humming a small show tune as she let her chin rest gently on his little head.

She hadn’t expected to find a random child wandering the streets. She was even more surprised that the toddler had taken one look at her and then stuck to her like glue, even though he was like a rapid dog. He wouldn’t tell her his name or who was supposed to be with him. He just stayed stuck to her side like a permanent tattoo.

Cass squeezed him. She’d keep him safe. At least until his parents came.

Even if she really, really wanted to keep him forever.

(In another state, three siblings were running around like headless chickens.

“WHERE THE FUCK IS DAN?!?”)

[millers-girl]

things worth saving

chapter 3 of willow & whiskey

pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

summary: you and Joel come together, and fall apart, all within the confines of Bill's town.

warnings/tags: age gap, adult language, blood and violence, death

word count: 4.8k

series masterlist

The next morning, the sun pulled you from sleep, though it did little to fight the exhaustion weighing on your body. You’d gotten little sleep last night – waking every so often to check on Ellie to make sure she was okay… and maybe every once in a while, your eyes drifted to where Joel sat on watch. Your empathic heart couldn’t help but bleed for his.

While Joel didn’t give anything away, Ellie was quieter than usual, and you could tell she was lost in her thoughts. Instead of pressing her to talk, you simply laid beside her, staring up at the sky. You pointed out constellations, whispering their stories, letting the sound of your voice fill the silence between you. You saved Orion––her favorite––for last.

Eventually, her breathing evened out, body relaxing against the makeshift pillow of her pack. You stayed up, watching the stars blink in and out of focus. What you didn’t notice was Joel, sitting a few yards away, listening. Watching. 

His weary gaze settled on you, ears tuned in to every word you spoke. He’d caught the way you shifted restlessly in your spot, rolling onto your side and then back, your body shivering against the cold. You had draped your jacket over Ellie without hesitation, leaving you to suffer the chill now.

When you woke, Joel's jacket was over you.

The warmth of it, the smell of earthy leather, lingered as you pulled it tighter around you. For a moment, a flicker of something unfamiliar twisted in your chest. This small gesture could’ve been softness, kindness. But, in the short amount of time you’d known Joel, you could whatever compelled him to do it was more complicated. Guilt, maybe. Responsibility. 

Your eyes moved across the dirt, to where he sat when you saw him last before drifting off to sleep. The spot was empty. 

You sat up, blinking the sleep from your eyes, and found him by the stream a few yards away. He was flexing his injured hand under the cool rush of water, knuckles cracked and raw from his fight with the guard.

You moved quietly, grabbing the small first aid kit from your pack and walking over. He didn’t react as you sat beside him, the early morning air still and thick between you two. Silently, you held a hand out.

Joel hesitated, gaze flickering between your face and outstretched palm. Then, slowly, he placed his hand in yours.

The contrast struck him immediately. His skin was rough, calloused, lined with age and hardship – completely different from the softness of your own fingers.

He didn’t flinch when you brushed over the bruising, but you felt the tension in his muscles, the way his fingers curled involuntarily at your touch.

"Does it hurt?" You asked, voice barely above a whisper so as not to disturb the fragile quiet of the dawn.

He shook his head, dismissive. But when you applied a bit of pressure, his jaw tightened, a slight flinch betraying him. 

Without reacting—he was sure you were doing it for his sake—you applied some ointment on his wounds before wrapping them in gauze, gently trying to avoid the sensitive area.

When you were done, you pulled out a small bottle of anti-inflammatories, shaking two pills into your palm. He stared at them, then took only one, swallowing it dry. 

You let him have that without argument. If this was his way of keeping control over something, you’d let him have it.

By the time you both returned to camp, Ellie was awake, sitting up against a tree. The moment you saw her, you made a beeline, kneeling to wrap your arms around her, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

"Hey, you sleep okay?" you asked, brushing the hair out of her face.

She nodded, but when she turned to Joel, her expression was tense. "Look, I've been thinking about – "

Joel cut her off. "I don't want your sorries."

"I wasn't gonna say sorry," Ellie snapped back, her voice unwavering. "I was gonna say I've been thinking about what happened. Nobody made you or Tess take us. Nobody made you go along with this plan – "

"Ellie," you warned softly, shaking your head. Now wasn't the time for this.

"No,” she insisted, “he made a choice. He doesn't get to blame us for something that isn't our fault." 

Joel waited, looking to see if you would talk her down. But, you didn't. Instead, you turned to him then, waiting. Would he deny it? Confirm? If you were him, you’d surely blame yourself – if you and Ellie hadn’t shown up, Tess would still be alive.

And even though Ellie was right—he did this of his own free will—you still felt guilty about it. Guilty about being the reason she was in the State House in the first place, guilty about ending whatever it was between them, guilty for playing a part in her death.

You looked up just in time to see Joel nod once at Ellie, quiet and sharp, coming to an agreement. 

And that was that. 

The five hour trek to Bill and Frank's was spent mostly with Ellie peppering you with questions to pass the time and fill the silence.

“What’s the first thing you’d do if the world wasn’t all fucked?” 

You thought for a second. “Disneyworld. I’d go to Disneyworld.” 

Ellie scrunched her nose. “What’s Disneyworld?” Even Joel’s head turned slightly at that. “What?”

You shook your head, feigning a sigh. “I’ve failed at raising you.” 

Ellie waved it off, moving on to her next question.

“What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever used as a weapon?” Once, you’d killed an Infected with a broken spatula handle; that was something.

"Would you rather kiss an Infected or eat rat jerky?” 

To that, you truly had no answer.

When she ran out of questions for you, she turned to Joel.

“Have you gone this way a lot?” To which he’d shrugged and said sometimes.

“Are there any Infected we should be looking out for?” No.

“Are Bill and Frank nice?” Frank was.

"How'd you get that scar on your head?"

That caught your attention. You glanced at Joel as he sighed.

Ellie continued. "What? Is it something lame, like you fell down the stairs or something?" 

"Someone shot at me and missed." 

"See, that's cool. You shoot back?" 

"Yeah." 

"You get him?" 

"No, I missed, too." Ellie scoffed. "It happens more often than you think."

"Cause you suck at shooting, or like, in general?" 

You snorted a laugh, disguising it as a cough when Joel shot a look your way.

His expression remained flat as he answered, "In general."

Before she could think up another question, the three of you happened upon a gas station where Joel had mentioned he stashed some supplies for when he ran low.

Inside, you watched Joel look around for a minute, eyes unsure.

“You forgot where you put your stuff,” you teased, watching his eyes scan the floor.

“No,” Joel argued. “I’m just zeroing in on it.” 

You nudged Ellie, mimicking his tone. “Zeroing in on it.”

When Joel finally unearthed his stash––and Ellie had wandered into the back to see if she could find anything good––you hopped atop the counter where the cash register sat and swung your feet.

As he dug through the dusty green duffel, you took a nosy glimpse inside and suddenly screeched in joy.“Are those tampons?!” You asked, hopping off the counter and reaching your greedy fingers out. Joel handed the blue box over, giving you a look. “What?” 

“Nothin’. Just don’t think I’ve ever seen someone get so excited about feminine hygiene.” 

“Yeah, you try living on pads as long as I have. It fucking sucks.” 

Joel cleared his throat. “Didn’t need to know that.”  

You quirked a brow. “Joel, when you bleed from your vagina for four days every month––get cramps, cravings for chocolate, and have to use the sandpaper they call ‘pads’ in the QZ––then you’ll get an opinion on this.” 

“Wonderful,” he huffed under his breath, going back to rummaging through the duffle. 

You stuffed the box of tampons in your pack before hopping back onto the countertop, eyes wandering around the store which was mostly picked over. As your brain wandered through different thoughts, you let out a scoff, the sound of your own amusement surprising you.

Joel glanced up at you. “Sorry,” you apologized, “It’s just – before everything, did you ever just go to the store just for one dumb thing? Like, you realize you’re out of milk, so you drive to the store, hand over a couple bucks, and that was it. No ration cards, no guards, no ‘hope no one stabs me on the way home.’ Just… milk.” 

Joel didn’t answer right away. His brow furrowed slightly as if he was sorting through distant memories. Finally, he nodded. “Yeah. Used to do it all the time.” 

Something about the way he said it––low, almost reluctant––made your chest tighten. The normalcy of that past life was such a foreign thing now.

You hesitated before speaking again, fingers tracing the dust on the counter. “One of the only memories I have from before the outbreak happened in a gas station. My mom and I were going on a road trip. She stopped somewhere to fill up the gas, and I – ” You let out a soft laugh. “I had been in the car for so long, I just took off running up and down the aisles of this convenience store on the side of the road with my mom chasing me. It made the attendant laugh so hard, he let me pick out a lollipop for free.” 

You glanced at Joel, his gaze heavy on you. It made your stomach twist – he wasn’t just listening, he was seeing you, maybe for the first time. 

You cleared your throat, shifting under the weight of his gaze. “You ever take a kid shopping?” 

It was meant to be a throwaway question, something to deflect from the sudden intimacy of the moment. But Joel immediately stiffened at it. His jaw ticked as he turned back to his pack, shoving supplies into it with a little too much force.

Oh.

The realization settled uncomfortably in your chest. You hadn’t really thought about it before, but now… Maybe Joel hadn’t always been alone. Maybe there had been someone else, before the outbreak – a kid.

The air felt heavier between you.

“You don’t have to answer that,” you finally said, softly. “I just – I think this is the first time in a long time I’ve had a real conversation with someone who isn’t Ellie.” 

After a pause, Joel asked, “And… verdict?”

Half-smiling, you answered, “I’ve had worse conversation and worse company.”

Joel didn’t respond, but something in his expression shifted just slightly, like he understood the sentiment. He didn’t mind your company either. And when it came to conversation – Hell, he couldn’t even remember the last time he and Tess had even had a real one, one that wasn’t about survival.

You could feel the moment lingering between the two of you until Ellie returned to the front room. 

When Joel was done restocking, you three were on the move again. The road to central Massachusetts stretched empty ahead, nothing but cracked asphalt and the occasional rusted car. Woods and fields flanked both sides. Then, up ahead, the landscape changed.

A plane crash. 

The wreckage was half-buried in the dirt, its charred remains a stark reminder of the chaos that had unfolded in those first days. Your stomach twisted at the sight.

“Jesus,” you muttered under your breath.

Ellie turned to Joel, eyes wide, seemingly unaffected by the gore of it. You didn’t know how she did that, or who she got it from – it certainly wasn’t you. “You ever fly in one of those?” 

“A few times.” 

“Lucky,” she grumbled. 

You looked at him, trying to distract yourself from the sight before you. “What was it like?”

“Sure as hell didn’t feel lucky. Got shoved into a middle seat, paid twelve bucks for a sandwich.” 

Ellie scoffed. “Dude, you got to go up in the sky!”

He just shrugged, glancing back at the wreckage. “Yeah, well, so did they.” Grim.

Silence fell as you kept walking. Ellie wandered ahead, kicking at a stray rock, leaving you and Joel a few paces behind. After a moment, he glanced over. “What about you?” 

“What about me?” 

“You ever go on a plane?” You shook your head. “Shame.”

You huffed a small laugh. “What happened to ‘shoved into a middle seat and overpaid for a sandwich’?” 

He shrugged. “Still… think you would’a liked it.”

Something about that––him saying that––made your chest warm.

“When you went – did you see stars? Was it at night?” 

Joel shook his head. “Didn’t get a chance to look out the window.” 

You whistled lowly. “I would’ve saved the twelve bucks you spent on that sandwich and upgraded to a window seat.” 

That actually made him breathe out a single laugh. A real one. And you… you liked the sound of it. It was rare, something buried beneath all that gruffness and exhaustion. He looked like he could use more of them.

But then, just as quickly as it had appeared, the frown was back. Joel scanned the surroundings, posture tightening. He called Ellie back. “We’ll cut across the woods here.”

Your brows furrowed. “Why wouldn’t we just keep going straight? Didn’t you say this road would basically take us most of the way there?” 

“Yeah, it’s just – there’s stuff up there neither of you should see.” 

Something about the way he said it made your skin prickle. The weight in his voice, the way his shoulders tensed.

Ellie, of course, saw it as a challenge. “Well, now I have to see.” 

“I don’t want you to,” Joel replied, voice firm.

“Ellie, you heard him,” you supported, watching the girl begin to make her way down the road. “Seriously, Ellie!” 

She turned, walking backwards. “Can it hurt me?” She asked Joel.

The moment “No” slipped past his lips, you whipped a hand up to cover his mouth, trying to stop it. He should’ve lied – it would’ve at least been more convincing at getting Ellie to follow him through the woods. You sighed, having heard his answer before turning to Ellie.

Ellie smirked. “You’re too honest, man.” She nudged her head toward you. “Gotta learn from the best.”

“It’s okay,” you tried reassuring him. “She’s a tricky one. There’s a learning curve to parenting her.” 

“I wasn’t trying to – ”

He stopped himself when he saw Ellie sharply stop at the edge of the road, eyes staring down into the valley ahead.

Your stomach dropped at the look on her face.

“What is it?” You asked, brows furrowed in worry as you rushed up to her. You gasped at what she was staring at – a mass grave. Hundreds of skeletons lay tangled together, bones bleached by the sun, scattered across the valley like discarded remains of remnants past. The sight made your breath hitch, nausea curling deep in your gut.

You turned to Joel, needing an explanation.

With a soft sigh, he said, “About a week after Outbreak Day, soldiers went through the countryside evacuating the smalltowns. Told you you were goin’ to a QZ, and you were… if there was room. If there wasn’t…” 

Your stomach twisted violently. The world blurred for a moment as you stepped back, to the other side of the road, before doubling over and emptying the meager contents of your stomach onto the grass.

A warm, calloused hand smoothed over your back, steadying you. Joel.

He didn’t say anything, just kept rubbing slow, grounding circles up and down your back.

For a man who rarely offered comfort, who kept his distance from anything too close, too raw… it meant something.

Only, you were a bit preoccupied to realize it at the time.

Bill’s town was like something out of a doomsday prepper’s handbook – a high voltage fence surrounding the entire thing, surveillance cameras everywhere, and an eerie silence blanketed over the desolate town.

Joel punched a code into the keypad beside the fence, and the click of the lock sounded before he pushed the gate open and let you and Ellie inside the town.

The houses were vacant, but they felt occupied, as if the people who lived here had just stepped out. Bill’s place, though, stood out. It was a fortress, marked by a slightly overgrown lawn and potted flowers lining the walk up to the porch.

Looking back, you think you knew it before you ever even entered the house. The flowers on the porch had wilted – the first sign.

Inside the foyer, the silence was thick. You tucked Ellie near your side as you stayed behind Joel, eyes gazing over the house. 

“Bill,” Joel’s voice broke the silence, waiting to hear a reply. “Frank?” 

No response.

Stepping further in the house, Ellie found an envelope and a key sat by the piano in the dining room. Addressed ‘To whomever, but probably Joel.’

She opened up the note inside, stating, “It’s from Bill.” She quickly read it to herself in silence.

Joel sighed, probably knowing what was coming, and shrugged his backpack off, grasping the key.

He glanced down the hall, at the bedroom on the far right.

“So they’re dead?” he asked.

Ellie nodded, gently humming in affirmation. 

Joel paced slowly around the room, the weight of the loss pressing down on him. Another friend––another two friends––lost in the span of a few days.

Your heart ached for him, but you didn’t know what to say. What could you say that would make this any better? 

“What does the note say?” you softly asked Ellie.

“August 29, 2023. If you find this, please do not come into the bedroom. We left a window open so the house wouldn’t smell. But it will probably be a sight. I’m guessing you found this, Joel, because anyone else would’ve been electrocuted or blown up by one of my traps. Hehehehe. Take anything you need. The bunker code is the same as the gate code, but in reverse. 

“Anyway, I never liked you, but still, it’s like we’re friends… almost. And I respect you. So, I’m gonna tell you something because you’re probably the only person who will understand.

“I used to hate the world, and I was happy when everyone died. But I was wrong because there was one person worth saving…”

Without meaning to, your gaze drifted toward Joel. His eyes had found Ellie, then slowly turned to you. That soft, warm brown met yours, something flickering in it. It was the same look he’d given you back at the gas station – but now, you were giving it back.

You were finally seeing him, too.

You were starting to understand exactly what kind of person Joel Miller was, and you weren’t shying away from it. Instead, you held his gaze, trying to offer him what comfort you could as Ellie continued to read in her oblivious innocence. 

“That’s what I did. I saved him, then I protected him. That’s why men like you and me are here. We have a job to do. And God help any motherfuckers who stand in our way.”

The corners of your lips quirked up into a small, almost imperceptible smile. Yeah, you were beginning to understand Joel more than you would admit aloud.

“I leave you all of my weapons and equipment. Use them to keep – “

The moment her voice caught, both you and Joel turned to look at her. The tension in the room shifted. And, just like that, Joel was moving, snatching the letter from Ellie’s hand in a single, swift motion. He finished the sentence.

“Stay here,” he ordered, his voice low and hard. Without waiting for a response, he stormed out of the house.

You looked at Ellie, who explained, “It said ‘use them to keep Tess safe.’”

You closed your eyes and let out a deep sigh before following him out the door. You found him in the garage, making a car battery. 

The noise of the tools around him was the only sound in the room, filling the space with a mechanical rhythm that felt out of place amidst the tension. You stepped closer, but he barely spared you a glance.

Softly, you began, “You know, I had someone once too.” 

Without looking up from the wire he was tightening, he coldly replied, “That so?”

Every cell in your body told you to leave him alone, but the look he’d given you back in the dining room while Ellie was reading the letter – you couldn’t let it go.

“Yeah. We were in the QZ together. Didn’t have much, but we made it work. Looked out for each other, kept each other safe – he kept Ellie safe.” A lump lodged itself into your throat and you forced it down before continuing, “He used to say it was enough… that even in a world like this, it was enough.” 

Joel finally looked up, his expression unreadable. He didn’t ask but there was something in his eyes that told you he understood exactly what you meant.

“I wish it had been,” you said, voice barely above a whisper before you cleared your throat.

Joel’s jaw tightened and he turned back to the battery, working faster now, as if trying to outrun the conversation. “What’s your point?” He asked gruffly, clearly irritated now.

“That you’re not the only one who had someone worth saving… that you’re not the only one who knows what it’s like to lose them.” 

You’d meant it as a comfort – that he didn’t have to do this alone. Instead, he took it as a criticism – you’re not the only one who's lost someone so get over it.

“At least I’m doing something with my loss,” he snapped, hands gripping the worktable.

Your head dropped, understanding what he was saying between the lines. He’d lost Tess and he was shifting that energy to do something about it – to build this car battery and finally get to his brother. 

You, on the other hand, were wallowing in your misery. Letting it be a part of you but never harnessing it for anything. Your grief was useless.

“Right,” you said finally, accepting his chastisement. Without another word, you turned on your heel and walked out of the garage, back into the house. You sat with Ellie, who could tell something was wrong, until Joel came back inside – he made a point to look mainly at Ellie.

“I just finished making a truck battery. It’s charging right now.” 

“Okay,” Ellie said.

“I have a brother, out in Wyoming. He’s in some kinda trouble and I’m heading out there to find him. He used to be a Firefly. And my guess is, he knows where some of ‘em are out there. Maybe they can get you to wherever this lab is.”

“Alright… uh – listen… about Tess – “ 

Joel held a hand up, cutting her off. His voice was hard, distant. “If I’m takin’ you with me, there’s some rules you gotta follow. Rule one: you don’t bring up Tess. Ever.” He glanced back at you before continuing, “Matter of fact, we can just keep our histories to ourselves.” 

You bit your lip, trying to process what he was saying. The distance between you stretched, maybe further than it ever had before, and it made your stomach twist.

“Rule two: you don’t tell anyone about your… condition. They see that bite mark, they won’t think it through. They’ll just shoot you.” Ellie nodded. “Rule three: you do what I say when I say it. We clear?” 

“Yes.” 

“Repeat it.” 

“She gets it,” you growled, stepping up to Ellie and crossing your arms over your chest, clearly not able to let the moment go. “What you say goes.” 

Joel let out a deep sigh, accepting it. “Okay. Let’s go grab what we can. Anything useful.” 

The house was full of supplies you three stuffed into your packs – food, clothes, even toilet paper.

After you were done, and had found the wonderful shock that the house had hot water, you raced Ellie to the bathroom, eventually letting her win and shower first.

When it was your turn, you stood under the warm spray, letting it soothe your muscles, your mind. Here, in the confines of the bathtub, you didn’t have to worry about Ellie, didn’t have to think ten moves ahead or keep an eye out for danger. 

Here, you could just be. 

Thirty minutes later, the water had washed away the exhaustion and you felt lighter, refreshed.

You stepped out of the bathroom––the soft warmth of the towel wrapped around you, wet hair dripping onto the wooden floor––and froze when you saw Joel standing there.

You met his gaze, not wanting to let him see how much he had rattled you. “What?”

He hesitated then shook his head. “Nothin’. You done with the shower?”

You nodded and slipped past him without another word, your pulse quickening.

After you dressed, you found yourself wandering through the house, until you ended up in what you guessed was Frank’s art studio. There was a half-finished portrait of Bill on the easel. In fact, there were pictures of Bill everywhere – it was clear Frank had poured everything into those canvases. You could tell how much he loved him.

You felt a lump form in your throat as you traced your fingers over the easels, the paints, the brushes. You knew it sounded silly but you could feel Frank in the room.

A person you’d never met but you immediately knew you’d like, based on this room alone. You stepped in front of a pot of lilies you assumed he was going to use for the painting of Bill, and plucked one by the stem, staring at it. 

You rummaged through your pack until you opened up your journal, softly pressing the flower between the pages. 

It was small but it would remind you of this place. Of the people who lived here and the love they shared. Of the love you once shared, in the confines of your cramped apartment in the QZ, with your blonde-haired sweet boy.

The creak of a floorboard behind you had you snapping your head back, caught off guard. Joel stood in the doorway, freshly showered, eyes locked on the tears you hadn’t realized were falling. 

“They’re not for you,” you said, your voice tight, though you wiped them away quickly, embarrassed.

Joel said nothing for a long beat. Then, he motioned to the flower you’d pressed. “Ain’t much use in keepin’ dead things.” 

You swallowed hard, the ache in your chest growing. You looked at the flower, the petals delicate on the page. “Not everything has to have a use. You can just appreciate things because they’re beautiful.” 

The silence between you thickened, and Joel didn’t take the moment to apologize for earlier. You hadn’t expected him to. Still, for some reason, it stung more than it should’ve.

Finally, he said, “The battery’s charged. You ready to go?” 

You nodded, your words caught in your throat, and walked past him, out the door, into the cold, open world once again.

Ellie was already sitting in the back, mesmerized by the newness of being inside a car. 

“It’s like a spaceship,” she dreamily said.

You turned to look at her as Joel settled into the driver’s seat. “Put your seatbelt on, love.” She turned to look at you, clueless.

It made you smile, reaching back to buckle her seatbelt for her before pressing a loving kiss to her cheek and returning to your seat.

As Joel began driving out of the neighborhood, your eyes caught sight of a blue tote bag by your feet. 

“Packed it for you,” Joel merely said, watching you open the bag from his periphery.

Inside were a stack of books, with the second installment of the Lord of the Rings trilogy neatly placed on top. You couldn’t believe that he’d remembered you telling him you were reading the first book back at his apartment, before you’d ever left for the State House.

You placed the second book onto your lap, fingers grazing the spine.

“It’s a long drive,” he added. I got you something so you wouldn’t get bored, was what was left unsaid. But it didn’t need to be said aloud. You heard it loud and clear, in the silence.

It wasn’t a big gesture but it did enough. You found the sting in your heart lessening.

This wasn’t an apology, and you opening it up to page one to begin reading, wasn’t an acceptance. But it was a middle ground, and that was something.

.

.

.

taglist: @orcasoul @lizlil@littleshadow17 @joeldjarin @mrsyixingunicorn10 @luvwanda @escaping-reality8 @hoddystark @mmkkzz

[inexplicifics]

Re: Taking care of the trainees in Kaer Morhen.

I'm imagining some poor sleep-deprived Crane who is desperately trying to find a way to put the chicks to bed, and at his wits end thought of a lullaby, maybe that'd help? Instead, he came up with the Witcher ABC's:

Arachas are awful and always aware, they lay in wait so always beware. Bruxa shriek loud and very achy, drink black blood and she won't wakey. Cockatrice come in many sizes and shapes, aard it down before it escapes. Drowners are dull and dreary and numb, kill them quick, don't be dumb. Endrega are seemingly everywhere, yes, even there. Fiends are frightening foes indeed, stab, then step aside with speed. Ghouls are common as sunrise, don't trust the dead, surprise! Harpies have high shrill voices, if you think they're pretty, you should rethink your choices. Imps inspire mischief and irritation, fuck, I need a vacation. Jumblehogs are just something I made up right now, but they look a bit like a cow. Kikimore will jump out of the ground to eat you messy, a tasty treat, fat and fleshy. Leshy will hug you very tight, but it's not a very nice hug. Myriapodans might be a mystery we should lay to rest, so they're not the best for a weapons test. Nekkers are nasty little creatures unloved by all, and they have this really annoying chattering call. Ogres are deep sleepers, wake them, and you'll sleep deeper. Plumards pluck pots and pans to beat you with, they're not very strong though, so take the hit. Rotfiends are rotted and dead, and I really want to go to bed. Shaelmaar are shiny and super adorable, but it's not worth it, wyvern hide is more affordable. Tomtar are a nice little daydream, they're not as nice as they seem. Ulv's are just really big wolves, really, but you should stay way from them, ideally. Vukodlaks are bigger than ulvs and werewolves to boot, stay at a distance to aim and shoot. Wadislaw is a bloke I saw in Novigrad once, he was a real ponce. Xylophones are instruments to play on, if you want witchers to stay gone. Yaguars are spelled Jaguars and are really big cats, I should've used that for J, alas. Zebras are striped horses and they don't exist, but if they do, tame one and bring it home. Q I forgot but lets say it's a quokka, smiley things who sacrifice their kids like I'm a'bout'ta'!

Jaskier puts a tune to it, and it's the greatest (worst) ear-worm that has ever existed.

This is delightful, thank you so much!

[thebroccolination]

THE EX-MORNING WILL HAVE "A LOT OF LOVE SCENES," ALL DESIGNED BY KRISTSINGTO

[Thank you again, @ysphcpb, both for your translation and your help locating a video source that allows subs! And also for your gifs and your general presence. <3]

[full unsubbed interview on youtube]

Transcript:

Ex-Morning director Lit explains that he gave Krist and Singto the freedom to design and modify their own love scenes, which flowed well without him having to give them any direction.

Krist: I mean, we're all grown up now, right? Honestly, I find it enjoyable when we discuss what we'll do in a love scene. Also, we might feel bored with the same old things we've done before, so we might want to put in some new things. So we had a blast designing [the love scenes].

Singto: There's so many. I mean, there are a lot of love scenes. [laughs]

Krist: I'm worried that there might be too many, and the fans might not like that~ [teasing]

Singto: But the two of us still do the same thing. Even during our SOTUS days, we would design love scenes and other scenes, reasonably. This time, both of us also design our own scenes, reasonably. So please stay tuned, and try to figure out which scenes Kit designed and which I designed.

Krist: It's gonna be something new that no one has never seen before, when it comes to love scenes between me and P'Sing. [turns to Lit] Right, P'Lit?

Lit: Right, right.

Krist: There hasn't been any of that before now.

Lit: Let's just say, they really redesigned [the scenes].

Krist: Please look forward to that. [laughs]

Lit: I also secretly screamed (t/n: in a shipper way) while watching the monitor. So many. I have to say, there really are a lot of love scenes.

Krist & Singto: Many. Many scenes.

[hazbinfallinginaspiral]

Comfortable Compliance

I wake to warmth.

Soft fabric beneath my cheek, the faint, steady sound of a voice humming somewhere above me. My body feels heavy, relaxed, sinking into the pleasant weight of—

My eyes flutter open.

Alastor’s legs are in front of me, his pinstriped trousers neat and crisp, one foot tapping idly to some rhythm only he can hear. I’m curled at his feet, nestled against him like I’ve been here all night.

I don’t remember lying down.

A small, sleepy sound escapes me as I shift, but before I can move further, a single finger hooks under my chin, tilting my head up.

Alastor gazes down at me, all sharp teeth and amusement, his crimson eyes glinting.

“Oh, poppet, you’re right where you belong.”

A shiver runs through me at the words. Something warm and pleasant trickles through my chest, curling around my thoughts and making them hazy. I shouldn’t like that as much as I do, should I? Shouldn’t I be—

I blink sluggishly.

What was I thinking about?

My thoughts feel scattered, slipping through my fingers no matter how hard I try to hold onto them. It’s like trying to catch smoke, always shifting, always slipping just out of reach.

I frown slightly, trying—trying so hard—to grasp onto something solid, something real, something mine.

Alastor tuts.

“Oh, dear… coming undone again?”

His hand brushes through my hair, fingers trailing down the back of my neck in a slow, deliberate motion. It sends another shiver through me, but this time, it’s soothing.

His other hand twitches in the air.

A thread tightens.

And suddenly, my mind snaps back into place—smooth, blank, calm.

I sigh softly, my body going slack against his legs. The tension I hadn’t realized I was holding melts away.

“There we are,” he murmurs, pleased, stroking my hair. “Much better.”

I don’t need to think.

I shouldn’t be thinking, anyway.

I close my eyes, nuzzling against his knee, content.

Alastor chuckles. “Good poppet.”

Alastor hums, a thoughtful little tune, his fingers idly toying with the threads as he gazes down at me. His other hand still strokes absently through my hair, his nails trailing lightly against my scalp.

“You know, poppet, this has been happening quite often, hasn’t it?” His voice is gentle, almost musing. “Grasping for your thoughts, struggling to hold on—only to slip right back into my hands. You just can’t seem to help yourself, hmm?”

He laughs softly, the sound warm and fond.

“Perhaps you’re overdue for a bit of re-conditioning.”

The words send a ripple through me—half anticipation, half something else. Something I can’t quite place.

“But…” He sighs, and I feel his fingers stop moving for just a moment.

Then he cups my cheek, his thumb brushing absently against my skin. “I don’t want to do that, dearest.”

I blink up at him.

“What fun is control if I have to keep taking it?” He tilts his head, crimson eyes gleaming. “No, no, my dearest poppet… I want you to choose this. To keep choosing me. To think, to remember—to be aware—and still let me pull the strings.”

His fingers twitch, and something in me responds—a quiet, instinctive submission, sinking in alongside the warmth of his touch.

Compliance settles in easily, naturally, like a familiar melody.

It’s always so comfortable like this.

He loves me, doesn’t he?

There’s no reason to resist.

I sigh softly, pressing just a little closer to his touch. Alastor grins, satisfied, and his humming resumes—low, sweet, wrapping around my mind like silk.

—

The next day, when I feel less fuzzy, when my thoughts feel a little more mine, I stop him.

His fingers had just started twitching, the faint pull of the red thread tugging at something inside me, the first whisper of that warm blankness creeping in—

“Wait.”

His brows lift in mild surprise.

“Oh? A rare little protest?” He chuckles.

I swallow, gathering my thoughts, steadying myself as best I can.

“I…” I hesitate. “I want to stay like this.”

His grin widens. “Oh, do you now?”

I nod, my voice firmer this time. “You can keep tugging the strings. Just… let me think. Let me process. I want to feel it.”

His expression flickers—something unreadable, something pleased.

Then, ever so gently, he gives the thread a little pull.

And I feel it.

A soft, warm shudder rolls through me, my breath catching. The control, the guidance—it’s there, undeniable, but I’m aware of it, able to savor it, to revel in it rather than simply falling into thoughtless compliance.

Alastor watches me carefully, his grin sharpening.

“Oh, poppet,” he murmurs, voice laced with something indulgent, something hungry. “What a delicious little request…”

Alastor gives the thread another slow, deliberate pull, and I feel it—deep, spreading warmth blooming through me like ink in water. It doesn’t force me down, doesn’t wipe me blank, doesn’t take—it guides, winding around my thoughts, pressing in just enough to make its presence known.

It’s intoxicating.

I shudder, my breath catching in my throat. It’s different like this—being aware of it, being able to soak in every little sensation, every delightful tug and pull. When he used to make me go blank, it was easy to sink into the haze, to let my mind slip away without question. But this—

This is better.

I feel the control, the way he holds me, the way my body and mind respond to him naturally. I’m conscious of it, not just swept away, and the awareness makes it all the more delicious. Every little shift, every gentle twitch of his fingers, sends pleasant ripples through me, an echo of his influence settling into my bones.

Alastor hums, and the sound alone sends a slow, melting heat curling through my chest.

“Ah, poppet… how does it feel?” His voice is honey-smooth, dripping with curiosity and amusement, but there’s something else beneath it—something pleased.

I exhale shakily, letting my eyes flutter shut for a moment, just savoring it. The weight of the thread around my wrist, the barely-there tension of it, the way my muscles feel loose, pliant, yet still mine. My thoughts drift, but they don’t disappear. They linger, soaking in the experience, reveling in every gentle pull.

“Good,” I breathe, my voice barely above a whisper. “It feels… so good.”

His fingers twitch, and a delicious little shiver rolls through me.

“Yes, I imagine it does.”

There’s laughter in his tone, but it’s not mocking. It’s indulgent. He’s enjoying this, watching me enjoy this.

Another tug, firmer this time. My body follows before I even think about it, my posture shifting, my spine straightening as if lifted by unseen strings. My head tilts just slightly, guided by invisible hands.

And I know I could resist if I wanted to. That’s the difference now. I could—but why would I?

Why would I ever want to?

The sensation is too good, too right, sinking into my stuffing like a second nature I never knew I had. My limbs feel light but controlled, held in a perfect balance between free will and submission. The warmth of his magic seeps through me, tingling pleasantly beneath my skin, like the afterglow of being wrapped in something soft and safe.

Alastor leans in, his breath ghosting over my ear. “You like this, don’t you, poppet?”

I don’t even hesitate.

“Yes.”

He chuckles, deep and rich, his voice curling around me like silk.

“Oh, how wonderful.”

His fingers flex, and another wave of blissful warmth rolls through me. I can feel his satisfaction, his delight at my surrender—not forced, not taken, but given. The thread hums against my skin, a constant, gentle reminder that I’m his.

And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

[ratrabbbit]

Wooo! Another twst oc! This is Kaaliya Chetan! He’s twisted from Kaa from the Jungle Book! Let me know if you like him, and fanart is always welcome! Just tag me or something! Also if you comment asking for a commission, I will delete it! If you want a commission, please dm me. And I have way more twst ocs on the rise, so stay tuned!

[vitaminseetarot]

Pick a Card: New Moon Messages 🌙

pic source - pinterest

*･ﾟ✧Masterlist | *･ﾟ✧Ko-Fi

Hey folks, I'm back for a brief pick a card reading for this new moon solar eclipse. It's snowing here too much to see the eclipse but I got good pictures from last year to remember by. So I thought I'd do a mini reading on what you may need to know for this moon month. I'll be coming out with another pick a card shortly so stay tuned!

{alsoalso: my blog just turned 2 years old! wowie!}

Pile 1 - Crystal 🖤 Pile 2 - Frost 🤍 Pile 3 - Liquid 💛

Pile 1 - Crystal 🖤

4 of Wands, XVII Star, VII Chariot; Supermoon - Emotions are running high, Retrograde - Review, Venus in Virgo - Discrimination, Limitless: "Know your worth."

Hey pile 1. Despite the usual quietude of new moons, you got the Full Supermoon card! I'm feeling a spark in your pile. I think out of all three, you are the most optimistic when it comes to the next few months after this eclipse. You are ready to engage in something special in your life that will bring expansion into your overall life. What you've been hoping or praying for may come into manifestation after this lunar cycle, and it may rock your world a little bit. This could be a graduation you're looking forward to, or a special event you've been invited to. I'm largely getting "event", that this will involve going somewhere. It will infuse you with a sense of hope and wonder.

With Retrograde, however, there may also be caveats worth looking into. As I'm writing this, we're in a retrograde, but if you're reading this at a different time it could be referencing a closer period of time for you. Retrogrades make us detach from the usual flow of tasks to think things over more thoroughly. With Venus in Virgo, this is a time to look very closely into details. Some of you may be looking into colleges. Even if you got accepted to a dream school, this is a reminder to look more gingerly into the documents you'll be signing. Feeling rushed into doing something is often a sign to refrain from acting in the moment, but during this new moon it would be good to practice precaution either way.

This isn't to say "avoid, don't do, it's bad", like in this example your dream school could very well be your ideal school. But it's important to know what you're getting into instead of believing that the tiny things will work themselves out without intervention. (If you have insurance and you don't want to get on the schools' insurance and end up paying more, you have to actually notify them!! x_X) If you're meeting someone for a date and something seems off, it's okay to reschedule the date to do a little more research or personal reflection. It's okay if you need extra time to mull big decisions right now, because these big decisions may play a big role in your life. Wishing you the best outcome, pile 1!

Pile 2 - Frost 🤍

XXI The World, Ace of Pentacles, 6 of Swords; Balsamic Moon - A Time For Healing, Pisces - Sensitize, Saturn in Aries - Risk, Self-Care: "Spoil yourself in the moonlight."

How's it going, pile 2. Before pulling cards I felt your vibe being sooo chill yet also warm like a cup of mint tea. This is certainly a time to give yourself the spa day and bedtime you deserve. I'm reminded of Atlas while looking at the World card here, like you've been shouldering a heavy burden for a while, and each sign represents a different responsibility or role you've had to take on in recent months. To others, you've had to play as the funny friend, the smart nerd, the dependable devotee, the cool rebel. And this new moon is bringing a time where the masks come off and these temporary illusions can be put to rest.

There's so much you've had on your plate that this time for healing is truly necessary. Spiritually and physically. It's unseen but I'm getting that there could be issues that develop later on if you try to ignore this need. I'm mainly seeing de-stressing methods, finding relaxing activities or eating food that calms your mind and muscles. I have recently found that it's easy to relieve jaw tension by snacking on something crunchy, for example, so a veggie platter may help when you're studying or working in the afternoon. There's also a spiritual component, although the nonspiritual folks in this pile may be more drawn to simple bed rest, meditation, deep art and music, or nature walks. Those here who are more religious would greatly benefit from activities that are nourishing to the soul, like reading your favorite scriptures or attending community gatherings that uplift the spirit.

The action you choose is not as important as the recovery. That is your primary message from the solar eclipse: do not bypass the need for regeneration, and with 6 of Swords, don't be afraid to move on from the masks that are falling apart. You've either passed or will be soon passing a major cycle and so you must have some kind of intermission before moving forward. It's really easy to wing it and say "I'll be fine," but if your body starts showing weird signs, listen to them! Cancel the class, talk to a doctor if need be, and get some sleep! Spring will have plenty in store for you so please be kind and respectful to your boundaries as you carry on. Take care, pile 2.

Pile 3 - Liquid 💛

6 of Cups, Queen of Wands, 5 of Swords; Blue Moon - Believe in the Impossible, Debilitated - Discomfort, Sun in Pisces - Vision, The Moon: "Take time to reflect."

Hello, pile 3. Your pile lunged itself at me as though the cards were super excited to get on with the reading. I'm feeling the urge to just get out of the old winter cave and be seen. The Queen of Wands in the center confirms that for me. You're coming into the new season with a lot of zest and momentum. You may already have an idea you wish to set in motion and can't wait to get started. However, the cards also say that you may currently feel held back in some way from being able to do so.

This sort of energy reminds me of a runner who's waiting for the marathon to start and is jumping around in place unable to contain their own nerves. Or like a flower anxious to come out of the ground even while it's still snowing outside. There's a certain amount of inconvenience or stagnancy you're having to put up with, which may come with some frustration. "When can I get this show on the road!" I hear. Despite this, the new moon's advice here is to step back and look over your future goals with care. The 5 of Swords can be about pushing something down for something else to rise, so it could be that you're being prevented from an unforeseen issue later down the road that could be costly to you. For example, a flower that pushes too fast to grow above the others may suddenly find themselves frozen over, leaving more room for other flowers to succeed in its place. In other words: "check yourself before you wreck yourself!"

The main message is to take it easy and conserve your energy for when it's finally time to bloom. When you're able to reassess your vision of the future to align it more closely with your values, instead of repeating past patterns, you may find that things will progress faster than you think once the marathon actually begins. And you'll be in a better position to handle it. You still have time to figure things out. Don't wear yourself thin before you've even gotten started, pile 3. Keep your energy tank and emotional reserves in check and the solar eclipse will usher in a beautiful and productive new season for you in the months to come. Godspeed, pile 3!

This reading has not been evaluated by the FDA to diagnose, prevent, treat, or cure any disease or infection. Please ask your physician before going online.

2025, @VitaminseeTarot ™

[freakycafetomoe]

Married Life with Gojo Satoru

✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚꩜ ︵︵pairing !! : Gojo Satoru x Reader ✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚꩜ ︵︵contains !! : Fluff, crack, domestic chaos, Satoru being the most dramatic husband ever, excessive whining, teasing, playful bullying, lots of kisses, clingy Gojo, height difference antics, public displays of affection, and a very patient (or maybe just resigned) spouse (you). ✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚꩜ ︵︵word count !! : 523 words ⇢ read on ao3 here.

pt. 1 | next

Husband! Satoru who makes a grand entrance every time he comes home. No, seriously. You could be in the kitchen, minding your own business, and suddenly—BAM! The door flies open, and he struts in like he’s walking a red carpet. “Honey, I’m home!” he announces, sunglasses sliding down his nose as he dramatically tosses his coat aside. If you don’t immediately run into his arms like a dramatic movie scene, he’ll pout. “What, no welcome home kiss? I fought so hard today…” (He did not. He had a meeting and ate sweets the entire time.)

Husband! Satoru who will 100% use his infinity against you—for the dumbest reasons. You try to flick his forehead? Your finger stops mid-air. You attempt to steal his snacks? Nope, your hand just hovers in place, and he smirks. “Ah, ah, ah~ only good spouses get a bite,” he teases, before popping the treat into his mouth and humming in satisfaction. The audacity. The disrespect.

Husband! Satoru who definitely fakes injuries for attention. “Baaabe,” he whines, draping himself across your lap like he’s on his deathbed. “I barely survived today… my students were so mean… I need comfort… kiss my forehead, please.” You roll your eyes, but when you don’t immediately comply, he gasps. Gasps. “Oh my god. You’re heartless. I married a monster.”

Husband! Satoru who absolutely bullies you with love. If you yawn, he pokes your cheek and coos, “Aww, is my little baby sleepy?” If you wear his clothes (which, by the way, are now yours), he melts on the spot. “Look at you~ all cute and wifey~” And if you ever trip over nothing? He’s already behind you, whispering, “Don’t worry, babe… I’ll still love you even if gravity doesn’t.”

Husband! Satoru who abuses his height difference just to annoy you. Need something from the top shelf? He grabs it… but then holds it above your head, grinning like a Cheshire cat. “Oh? You want this? Say ‘please, my amazing, incredibly handsome husband~’” Smack him. Immediately.

Husband! Satoru who has zero chill in public. The second someone so much as looks at you for too long, he’s pulling you into his side, pressing a loud, obnoxious kiss to your cheek. “Aww, babe, you’re so popular~ But don’t worry, I know you only have eyes for me.” Meanwhile, the poor stranger was literally just walking by.

Husband! Satoru who dramatically complains whenever you leave the bed first. “Nooo, don’t gooo,” he groans, wrapping his entire body around you like a human octopus. “Stay with me. We can survive on love and air conditioning.” When you finally pry yourself free, he flops back against the pillows with a defeated sigh. “So this is what heartbreak feels like.”

Husband! Satoru who always makes sure you know just how much he loves you. Whether it’s pulling you close at night, pressing a soft kiss to your temple, or whispering “You’re my favorite person in the world” when he thinks you’re asleep, he means every word. And honestly? You wouldn’t trade your ridiculous, over-the-top, drama king of a husband for anything.

…Well. Maybe for five minutes of peace. A/N: I’m going to be dumping all my works here, so please bear with me! I’ll also be adding a few more parts next, so stay tuned. Hope you enjoy reading! 😊

Credits to @cafekitsune for the pretty divider! :3

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[docochocart]

DOCORONPA R

GRAND FINALE

Drummer's question put a new tension in the room, subconsciously unraveling the security the last trial gave. It really *could* be one of them. Bartender, however, seemed peeved by the implication:

"Not this shit again, this is why the lamb can't talk to you anymore."

Drummer moved past her non-reply:

"Yeah, and you're worse at answering than the robot webkinz. Simple question. Yes, or no?"

Bartender scoffed, beads of sweat beginning to line her twisted expression:

"Who do you think you're talking to?"

Drummer replied:

"The desperate most desperate girl in the world."

Bartender was truly taken aback for the first time this trial, breaking from her condescending persona for a moment:

"Shut the fuck up, you frumpy littl- I-I mean... It's not like you can bring your friend back like this."

Drummer ignored the desperate jab, staying head strong:

"I know. Was it done at his command?"

Bartender took a step back in her podium, hitting a defensive posture:

"E-excuse me? What do you mean?"

Drummer broke eye contact with the frazzled traitor to scan the room around her:

"If we're going off gut feelings... I say we pick the obvious choice a second time."

Sailor sloppily tuned back into the ever-shifting conversation:

"Uh, what's the obvious?"

Drummer looked at him with dead eyes, simply answering:

"You."

Sailor furrowed his brow, a look of bewildered confusion washing over him.

"Uh, fuck you mean me?"

The whole room looked to Drummer with crooked brows, she continued:

"Your daddy's a billionaire and you are the only one who didn't vote for Bartender. Why wouldn't it be you?"

Sailor passively glanced over his shoulders, checking to see if anybody was buying this narrative:

"...how would that make me-"

Drummer interrupted the seemingly confused giant:

"Didn't you go to highschool with the girl Bartender killed? Didn't you spend the most time with this traitor out of anybody? Wouldn't your rich daddy have saved you by now?"

Sailor couldn't answer a question before another one was slapped on:

"Are you oka-"

Drummer continued on without a beat:

"If Salesman was the opening, you two's little buddy up would line up perfectly with her "recruitment". Considering she was already a traitor by the time she killed Cowboy and Streamer."

Sailor continued to stammer:

"Wh- can you slow dow-"

Cold as ice, she pressed deeper:

"Why did you have her killed?"

Sailor's defensive posture quickly turned to a furious one:

"Ok lady, that's enou-"

Drummer roared over him:

"STOP PLAYING DUMB, YOU BIG PUSSY."

Sailor was raised to outright fury at this point, nearly leaning out of his podium to intimidate Drummer:

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

Drummer kept the same energy:

"WHY DID YOU WANT HER DEAD? THOUGHT SHE'D REMEMBER SOMETHING INCONVENIENT? WAS IT TO FUCK WITH ICE SKATER? WAS IT TO FUCK WITH ME?"

Sailor shook his head, getting more flustered with each new accusation:

"H-how dare you bitch! I'm just-"

Drummer looked him dead in the eyes, simmering down for a final dig:

"You're a terrible fucking actor."

Sailor snarled, a new look washing over his face. Disgust:

"Ugh. Fuck this."

*BOOM*

A chorus of shotgun blasts once again left the room temporarily deaf, the cloud of tacky, glittering, golden fog that followed left the cast temporarily blinded as well.

Excluding the gasping and coughing escaping every camper, the room was once again silent. It was as if all of her senses had been attacked at once.

Relief came as the massive industrial vacuums began pulling the cloud out of the room, allowing the cast to regain their eyesight.

Before she could even focus on what was in front of her, Drummer could make out Sailor's massive silhouette taking up the center podium:

"Well, well, well, guess you got me."

MEET YOUR

THE ULTIMATE SAILOR

A comically evil chuckle escaped the goliath of a mastermind:

"Salesman was right about you."

Before Drummer could reply, Ice Skater interjected in disappointment:

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me."

Sailor looked all to pleased by her sour reaction, smirking her way:

"That's right toots. This is my show."

Bartender called out from her newly occupied podium amongst the cast, alerting them that she was still there:

"And I'm the costa-"

Rebel, ignoring the traitor, targeted the source for information:

"Ok so why are we here? What the fuck is this?"

Sailor let out a maniacal laugh so inauthentic the room collectively cringed:

"Oh you poor soul... So, so many reasons..."

Welder shuddered in reaction to this strange performance:

"Why... are you talking like that?"

Sailor, visibly hurt by the crowds reaction, shifted gears:

"Ok, so you all know who my dad is right?"

The room, already losing him, awkwardly nodded in silence:

"Ok so like... This whole thing was made just for me. I'm like the muse of it. It's for me to win."

Drummer shook her head:

"What does that mean you fucking freak?"

Sailor shook his head:

"You should be more thankful. Coulda chose you to break."

Drummer almost bit, before Rebel interrupted in his usual style:

"Back on track, big guy. What's your dad want to do with us?"

Sailor, sighing in annoyance, explained:

"With you all specifically? Not much. He had an AI program select most of you for this to be honest."

Ice Skater questioned the implication:

"But we were selected by Hopes Peak University? Were we not?"

Sailor chuckled:

"His company bought out that phony school like 2 years ago. Was a failing business model anyway."

Ice Skater, now seemingly anxiety ridden, retorted:

"I-I think I'd remember something like that."

Sailor smirked, silently tapping the side of his head:

"What you think that puppy's for?"

Clearly he was referencing the chip they'd all been implanted with, setting the theory in stone.

Rebel threw in another smart remark:

"Guessin that's another business venture of pops?"

Sailor chuckled:

"Oh yeah, these microchips are planned for gen-pop. They're gonna be worldwide soon."

PT got a word in for the first time since Sailor's big reveal:

"So what, we're just guinea pigs to you?"

Sailor grinned wide, already amused by his own wit:

"Nah, honestly closer to the pigs from the farm. They got the same chips you do."

Rebel cut in yet again:

"So what? This just some fucked up tech demo?"

Sailor chuckled:

"Kinda. But not for the chips."

Ice Skater shook her head:

"What?"

Sailor continued:

"AI is the future, at least that's what my dad thinks. He says it's the 'future of every industry' or something like that..."

Drummer rejoined the discussion, already angry again:

"You've been killing us for a fucking AI project?"

Sailor looked at her dead in the eyes:

"Yes. What are you gonna do about it?"

Before Drummer could leave her podium to strangle him, Rebel continued digging for answers:

"How is having us kill each other gonna help your daddies tech start up?"

Sailor sighed:

"Ok. This is getting tiresome. Let me just explain."

The cast gave him the room to speak, all ready to pounce if he wasn't succinct enough with his explanation:

"When the AI scene was really getting going a few years back, my dad was shy to invest. Next thing you know, that shit's fucking everywhere. Even his home turf of entertainment."

Drummer quietly looked up at the nearest security camera as Sailor continued on, dread pumping through her veins:

"So this is where Salesman comes in, cuz he had an AI more advanced than any other on the market. Best of all it was completely unknown up until that point. He drove a hefty bargain and a high price point, but my dad knew it'd be worth his while."

Sailor was beginning to feed off the collective eyes on him, adding gravitas to his speech:

"That's around the time he sent me off on that two year voyage-stunt-thing, sure got the media's attention on me."

He looked down for a moment, almost somber:

"There hasn't been a moment of my life he hasn't been trying to push me into this fuckin' industry. He's certain this one's gonna be my big break, though. Maybe he'll get off my fucking back."

Ice Skater finally interrupted his rich kid complaints:

"All these cameras, is this footage being used for something?"

Sailor grinned ear to ear, all happy to tell her:

"Yeah, but don't worry honey. Your face won't be in it."

Ice Skater began to question what he was implying, before Welder interjected with a gasp:

"Oh my- is that the AI you're testing?"

Rebel's eyes widened:

"Oh fuck."

Sailor chuckled, cockily leaning up against the podium like a douche:

"Yeah so, this whole writer's strike thing has been a fuckin' pain. Box office numbers have been shit since half of the industry joined this stupid union. Nobody want's to work anymore."

The collective eye roll ignored, Sailor continued:

"Plus after we started using AI all of these lefties have been boycotting. My dad really didn't have a choice but to do this. It's necessary to save the company."

Drummer swallowed her disgust, only asking:

"And what is this?"

Sailor finally coughed it up:

"It's gonna be the next big limited Netflix series. Productions already at work casting all your roles with up and coming, non-union affiliated actors."

Ice Skater, bewildered by what she was hearing, questioned:

"Actors? What are we filming for then?"

Sailor mocked her tone, before rudely explaining:

"What do you think the AI is for? You're all gonna be deepfaked into obscurity by our editing firm, everybody except me."

Bartender desperately took her moment to chime in:

"Thats how they got my execution by the way, was just some poor kid production fed to pigs that they traced over with my scan."

Everybody did their best to ignore her, it seemed to be their best strategy. Personal Trainer, still facing Sailor, recoiled:

"This is content for you?"

Sailor shrugged:

"My dad asked our AI for the next big "Squid Games" pitch, it shat this idea out."

Personal Trainer shrieked:

"And you actually did it?"

Sailor, strangely offended, asserted himself:

"That's the industry dude. It's cut throat out here. This isn't even our first attempt."

A chorus of whats from the cast demanded an explanation:

"First time we tried it the people were boring assholes we kidnapped off the street. Went nowhere. Then my dad bought out hopes peak, we was gaming their system for 'talent.' He used the AI for that part too."

Ice Skater questioned:

"And this AI just happened to select you?"

The giant narcissist swept off the question:

"Nah I wasn't part of the hopes peak audition, my dad didn't want me involved in that. Coulda make things messy after all you rejects went missing. Plus it's kinda for broke losers..."

Drummer perked up:

"Where are we now?"

Sailor confusedly replied:

"A courtroom?"

Drummer clarified:

"I meant globally."

Sailor replied cheekily:

"Not America, stupid."

This sent shockwaves through the courtroom, but Drummer didn't budge.

"Where does the world think we are?"

Sailor sighed:

"This parts boring. Theres no confirmation but the state department says you're likely in [REDACTED]. Dad says it's so they can send troops in there later this year. Crazy shit."

Welder winced in reply:

"This is so fucked up..."

Ice Skater towed the line:

"And how do they think we got there?"

Sailor groaned in boredom:

"Basically we sent you rejects on some sort of participation-trophy, loser vacation. On the way back it went mysteriously off the grid, though."

Drummer, still unamused, finished the story:

"And now we're here. Wherever here is."

Rebel tried to lay it all out:

"Let me get this straight. We've been here in this camp murdering eachother for your nepo baby career breakthrough."

Sailor sneered:

"Again, it's a lot more than a Netflix

Show. Dad's been calling it an 'industry shift.' When this succeeds other companies are gonna take notice and follow suit. We're making history right now, isn't that awesome?"

A visibly dejected Bartender let out a pathetic "woop." Everybody else shuddered in disgust.

Drummer, doing her best to stomach all of what she was hearing, pushed the conversation forward:

"So what happens to us now?"

Sailor shrugged:

"Eh, this productions almost over so you're gonna get a little break before the next one. A staycation, if you will."

Rebel predictably protested:

"You're not holding us any fucking longer, buddy. You got what you needed."

Sailor squinted down at him:

"You don't make the rules here pal. And if you want, we still got room to lose one more of ya."

Rebel, now nearly manic, continued while rustling in his coat pocket:

"Yeah, you."

Rebel retrieved the pistol he'd kept in his pocket, having not been seen by the other campers since they escaped the farm. Sailor chuckled:

"The fuck you gonna do with that? You already used every bullet we gave ya."

Rebel cracked a wild grin:

"You sure about that?"

Sailor, almost disappointed, responded:

"Uh, yeah-"

Before the giant could successfully brush off Rebel's empty threats. He was interrupted by an unexpected blow to the head, Ice Skater.

The athletic girl had managed to successfully vault out of her podium, reaching Sailor's podium in less than a second:

"Die! Die! Die!"

She'd already managed to grapple her way up his torso, tugging at his fraying locks. The giant screamed in shock, fumbling to pull the girl off of her:

"What the- fuck, what the fuck is w-wrong with- FUCK."

Before Bartender could exit her podium to defend her boss, Ice Skater had already exacted her plan.

Removing the pin up-keeping her ponytail, Ice Skater drove the accessory into their captors eye with all her might. His wail of pure agony bringing a grin to her now blood soaked expression.

Then, in an instant, they were gone.

The floor beneath their now shared podium had retracted, sending them both into an unknown void. Sailors screams ended as the floor resealed. Silence filled the courtroom.

Nobody knew what to do, all trembling behind their podiums as Bartender fell to her knees.

*BOOM*

All shotguns sounded off at once, a final scare for the remaining cast. Heads spun in all directions as golden confetti rained down atop them. What the fuck, was it actually over?

The massive screens adorning each courtroom wall answered their question, all displaying a golden:

"CONGRATULATIONS."

It was over... they'd made it. At least from what they could tell.

The courtroom doors mechanically re-opened as the cast breathed a final sigh of relief. Bartender desperately tried to pry the trap door that had swallowed Sailor back open to no avail.

It seemed they were free to leave. But where would they be going?

The remaining four campers: Drummer, Welder, Rebel and Personal Trainer, eyed with looks of fear and bubbling excitement.

What Now?

[manicxsiren]

★☠︎︎ 𝒟𝒶𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒦𝑒𝓃𝓃𝓎 𝑀𝒸𝒸𝑜𝓇𝓂𝒾𝒸𝓀 𝐻𝑒𝒶𝒹𝒸𝒶𝓃𝑜𝓃𝓈 ☠︎︎★

Chronic smoker.

^If it bothers you he doesn’t smoke around you and waits till you leave to hit a blunt.

If it doesn’t bother you, you help him roll joints and you both smoke them until your eyes are red and you’re giggling uncontrollably and having a sloppy make out sesh on your bed.

Big PDA person for sure.

Hands are always on you in some way. He’s obviously got to show off his pretty girlfriend.

Would definitely be a big fan of pet names which consists of ‘sweetheart’, ‘baby’, ‘babe’.

^nothing too cringe. he makes fun of couples that overdo the pet names.

Your biggest fan ever.

If you play a sport or do dance or you’re a theater kid, trust he’s in every crowd cheering you on and supporting you always.

He’s tall for sure. Not as tall as Kyle is but definitely a giant compared to you.

I feel like he’s around 6’0 with a really lanky but toned body since he works a lot.

He works like 2 jobs just to support his family especially his little sister Karen who loves when you come over to their house. She loves having two brothers who look out for her but she’s always wanted a sister to play dress up with.

Not like Kenny doesn’t play dress up with her.

^ Whenever they come over to your house, you would pull out some drug store makeup and ribbons and even put Kenny in one of your dresses.

Doesn’t keep up with social media a lot. He would rather walk around the block late at night smoking a joint or taking you out to the movies.

^He definitely saves up his money to take you out and makes sure that you never have to pay even if you offer.

Also doesn’t really play any sports.

^He’s good at some stuff and will play with his friends every now and then but he isn’t part of any teams.

He is really good at playing the guitar though.

You sit at the edge of your bed with him as his fingers strum a melodious tune that just has you in awe.

He loves spending time with you and prefers to be at your house since his home life isn’t the best.

He lays his head on your chest and sleeps while you run your fingers through his shaggy blonde hair.

Very touch starved. Which is why he always has a hand on you, kissing your forehead at random moments, sometimes even cupping your face in his hands and presses a soft kiss to your lips.

He loves taking pictures of you. He just thinks you’re so beautiful…scratch that…he knows you’re beautiful and so does everyone else, and the fact that he’s the one that you’re dating is such an ego boost.

Before you both started dating you barely knew each other. You knew of each other from being in a few classes together but other than that there was no actual interaction between you.

His friends like you. They think you’re a good influence on him and you’re helping him change for the better. Except for Cartman (no one cares what he thinks)

“The bitch is corrupting him, he’s all love sick it’s so freaking disgusting”

He loves the way you smell.

It’s definitely more warm and comfortable compared to the smoky scent of a cigarette lingering on his work uniform that he clearly smoked after a shift at the restaurant and a faint smell of wine that he spilled on himself.

There are some days when he prefers to stay at your house for long periods of time. He finds comfort and solace in your presence and it’s the only thing that’s keeping him grounded.

We all know he’s not a virgin but he would never pressure you into doing something you’re not comfortable with.

You’re his first real girlfriend and the person he loves and cherishes. He would never want to mess that up over something he can control.

You help him out in school.

^He wants to do better and get into a good college since he sees a future with you. Before everything use to be foggy and he had no plans for his life other than to live in the moment and smoke away his brains.

With you in his life, he feels a sense of purpose.

[guesswhoisofftheirmedsagain]

TW: character implied to have the desired to commit suic*de. (It’s very brief, but stay safe, ok?)

Found this lurking in the notes app, also technically warning for kidnapping (but like, to save him from himself yk)

In short, Kon from an alternative universe finds a new, seeming unloved Tim, and is all like “ima love that one”. Turns out, that Tim was loved, (the Batfam was apparently just really, really bad at showing it, and his Kon very much misunderstood what Tim wanted) and they all fight over him.

Full post (with warnings applied) below:

Kon from an alternate universe loses his Tim, and hops multiverses until he can find a Tim similar to his Tim. He was never able to confess his love to his Tim, so he will find a Tim who needs loving and love that one. (He is great at this whole grief thing, why do you ask?) He impulsively kidnaps Tim after talking to him, and well Tim goes along with it because he wasn’t planning on staying much longer anyway.

Dark!Fam Tim is alone, he always has been. His teammates don’t talk to him, hell they don’t even text him. He was planning on ending it all that night, nobody would notice he was gone. At least until his body was found probably weeks, if not months later. That was until Kon showed up at his nests balcony. This Kon looked off, he didn’t know how to describe it. They hung out for a while, and Tim slowly loosened up. After more than a few drinks, Tim ended up telling Kon about his plan to die that night, and how he was happy he could talk to his friend one last time. Kon basically says “nuh uh” and takes Tim to his dimension with a device that he had bc plot.

Tim and Kon are living happily ever after (not really, Tim is trying to find a way back to his home dimension, but can’t help but fall in love bit by bit each day with Kon, real Beauty and the Beast vibes)

Unlike what he predicted, someone does notice he’s gone, immediately. It was Kon, of their universe. Kon might not have really talked to any of the Bats or birds in a while, but he still listens to their heart beats. He likes listening to Tim’s, because even if they haven’t talked in a while (Kon was respectful of the space Tim so obviously wanted) he still wanted to make sure he was safe. Kon laying in bed, playing a game when he heard it. Or technically, a lack of hearing something. Tim’s heartbeat, it was gone, it was always there, a low ring in his head that he never tried to tune out, it was gone. It didn’t fade slowly, just abruptly stopped, disappearing into nothingness just like that. Kon found himself flying to Gotham, forget the No Metas rule, something was wrong, and he was going to find out what.

We end up with two Kon’s fighting over Tim, maybe they rip him in half in the process, or maybe they learn to share? Who knows, I definitely don’t. There is also a very clingy Batfam (the one that lost their Tim) who wants to snatch him up, and Tim’s original BatFam who wants him back. They are all competing for Tim’s love and affectionate, and Tim is 95% sure it’s all fake, they just pity him, and he’s 98% sure the they are all actively trying to kill him. He’s very confused, he’s never had this much attention in his life.

[paulmccartneyexplodingonstage]

“If we can’t be lovers we’ll never be friends…”

Mixed media, 22.5x30in, 28 hrs

(click for better quality)

One day I’ll sit down and give an extensive talk on my experience with synesthesia, but for now I’ll just say that for me, music has always been tied to my art. Inextricably. When I put on music as I paint it’s not just background noise, it’s actively informing the piece. This is an example of me taking that to the logical extreme, this entire piece was made and crafted by the music I heard as I painted it. Using Beatles (and solo career) songs from across their lifespan, the finished piece becomes a visual symphony of shared history between Paul McCartney and John Lennon. Everything shared, and everything left unsaid.

[may12324]

Opening my online store tommorrow!

So if you've been eyeing my Baldur's Gate art, I'll have them up for sale! Including large scroll prints, bookmarks, as well as digital files!

My Store will be open from the 27th of Feb to the 8th of March or until I reach 100 physical orders.

[chiscribbs]

Hey y'all, I'm alive! :D

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

my favorite scully and mulder moments from s6

the long kiss between mulder and hallucination/time warp scully in episode 3, which he says is “in case we never meet again”. she responds with a fist to his face- and he remarks that he was expecting a left hook instead of a right. i will think about this forever

scully listening to his rambles after he's been rescued from the ocean and placed in a hospital bed: “i would’ve never seen you again, but you believed in me” “in your dreams”, she laughs

and of course: “hey scully? i love you” “oh, brother” (fade to black as he cradles where she punched him in the face with a smile... haha, yes!!! the surface-level fluff and then the angst beneath it!!!! GOD!!)

episode 4’s area 51 roadtrip dialogue: “outpost 134. two miles to go” (the driest scully voice imaginable) “i’m allllll atingle”

(and then the heart-wrenching monologue of hers that follows: “don’t you ever want to stop? get out the damn car?”, and his frail insistence that they do have normal lives and nothing needs to change..... wow. it hurt splendidly)

they meet up again in episode 5, and scully can't figure out how to get mulder back into his own body. “you don’t look too happy. don’t tell me i’m going to have to put two kids through school” “that is you in there, isn't it, mulder?” <- sobbing. loudly. to recognize someone outside of their own body....

and when he tries so hard to convince scully that she can prove to kersh the nature of the body swap, never doubting her for a moment, she says “i’d kiss you if you weren’t so damn ugly” <- oh!!!! OH!! OH!

him giving her the sunflower seeds to remember him by when they think they are being separated forever... 💔 but don't worry! everything is okay in the end! thank goodness!!

mulder telling her the spooky story of lyda and maurice in episode 6; she tells him it is a great story, and he told it very well, but she has to go spread some holiday cheer!!!

the skeletons they find in the haunted house were wearing their outfits. mulder laughs: “how embarrassing”. and when they realize it's somehow THEM, they FREAK out!!!!!!

lyda teasing them about their feelings for each other, and mulder’s absolute certainly that scully would NOT kill him, no matter what <3

scully coming to his door the morning after the whole debacle instead of opening presents with her family like she said she would- she’s still shaken up, so she asks to come in (her! asking! to come into his apartment!), and he grabs her by the shoulders and guides her in

and he agrees with her claim that all of the ghostly adventures must have all happened in their heads, trying to push the implications out of both their minds

AND the gift exchange that follows, even though they agreed not to buy each other anything… their giant smiles as they tear into the presents on his couch, snow falling out the window <3 when i tell you i could have cried....

they way they look at each other in episode 8 when mr. hardt describes his town as “sexy through the lens of weather”, as if they were going to debrief and laugh about it the INSTANT they got in the car... it was SUCH a besties moment, i lost it

and all of the many times in that episode they were mistaken for a couple... i'm a simple woman, okay? i like simple things

scully responding with absolute silence when mulder says he is helping mr. hardt find a date (“... mulder, when was the last time you went on a date?” “i will talk to you later!” he declares, hanging up)

scully carefully checking mulder for any signs of concussion while he proposes the wild theory that someone purposefully threw a cow at him... really just an average day for them, tbh

the way they worked together to doctor up skinner in episode 9... he turns off all the lights and dangles a desk lamp so she can investigate... oh, that was a GOOD moment among a list of very good moments!!!

scully showing up to the gym where he was playing basketball in episode 11- he shoots a three pointer to impress her, and she says “mulder, it’s my distinct impression that you just cheated” <- get his ass!! (he wanted to WOO HER WITH BASKETBALL🥲)

she shows up again to the gym after they get in trouble and lose their jobs: “scully, you wanna go one-on-one? we’ve got nothing but time now that we’re on administrative leave” “aren’t you curious what i’ve got in the box?” (<- and that's Them, isn't it? he wants to play ball, she wants to play show and tell with the secret documents, they're both getting in trouble, saving the world, ignoring the consequences of their actions... i just love it)

(AND when she shows him sensitive photos of his father with CSM, she waits for him to say that he is ready before moving onto the next picture, trying to give him time to process his world being rocked... so what if i cry?)

being soaking wet and cranky with each other in episode 13: “he’s seen things i’ve only read about” “because sea monsters can only be read about, mulder, because they don’t exist” <- TELL HIM! 🦑

scully’s reaction to learning he has a waterbed in episode 14 AND his puzzled face when he discovers she was not, in fact, the person who gave it to him (WHY DID HE SEEM TO THINK IT WAS HER?? I'M STILL LAUGHING OVER THISSSSS)

their mid-time loop conversation on the nature of fate and free will: “i think that we’re free to be the people that we are- good, bad, or indifferent. i think it’s our character that determines our fate” “all the rest is preordained? i don’t buy that; there’s too many variables”

(but doesn't that show so much of who they are in so few words? isn't that an amazing view into their characters and how they fundamentally differ? AHH, i want to yell about it!!!)

also, there was never a universe where the two of them didn’t charge into the bank to save the day, because that is just who they are ❤️

ALL OF THE FAKE MARRIED MOMENTS IN EPISODE 15!! the angst in the way she shoves him off of her when all the neighbors leave… but how excited they were to search the house for clues… their dramatic commitment to staying in character… “how was your first night?” “oh, it was wonderful; we just spooned up and fell asleep like little baby cats”... cuddled up on the couch in front of the HOA president… scully grabbing his hand when he is told he can’t have a basketball hoop… her awkward laughter at dinner with the neighbors when he makes a joke about eating dolphins... LORD. i was the fan they were servicing

and despite all the silly stuff, they work SO well together to try and get information out of the neighbors.... BUT! scully does not let him kiss her cheek when she gets up to leave and it nearly cracks their facade, lmaoooo

mulder’s gasp when scully emerges from their shared bathroom with a green face mask- and then he immediately tries to play it cool!!!

mulder is digging a hole, and scully asks “do you care to hear what i think?” he answers “always” (screaming a little here)

mulder luring in scully to get involved with the mysterious dog-related deaths in episode 16 by hanging up the photos in their office, because he knows her so well. she's ignoring his ridiculous pun as she focuses on the impossibility of a dog doing these killings: “mulder, i don’t have to tell you how absolutely and completely wrong that seems” <- yeah girl, we know! you want to autopsy right now!!

mulder infodumping on cryptozoology to the cops and scully apologizing on his behalf: “animals that aren’t supposed to exist, like the sasquatch and the ogopogo and the abominable snowman-” “don’t mind him, he’ll go on forever” <- the gentle teasing, the familiarity of it all... to know someone enough to know when they cannot stop... her being so used to his nerdiness... it's all so good

scully knows that karin is tricking mulder the whole time. when she tricks him AGAIN into sitting at the hospital all night, scully snatches the magazine from his hands and turns her body away so that there is visible distance between them DESPITE them sitting on the same couch.... ooooo, that angst is GOOD!

(and later, she falls asleep on the couch, and he uses the magazine to gently tap her awake......)

at the end of the episode, mulder is blaming himself for what went down. scully realizes this, sitting on the edge of the desk, saying that karin analyzed him exactly right, and perhaps in doing so meant to pay him the ultimate compliment. he rubs his eyes like he can barely stay awake, and fidgets with a screwdriver as scully asks him if he will be alright. she's not telling him that it isn’t his fault or rubbing in the fact that she knew he was being manipulated- she's just trying to show him that karin admired him, and she means every word

scully gets so SENSITIVE in episode 17 when she proposes the human combustion theory, which resulted in us getting the incredible line “dear diary, today by heart leapt when agent scully suggested spontaneous human combustion”

flirting in the basement in episode 19: “mulder, it is such a gorgeous day outside. have you ever entertained the idea of trying to find life on this planet?” “i have seen the life on this planet, scully, and that is exactly why i am looking elsewhere” (god, that one had me LAUGHING)

then they spend a long time teasing each other, with him stealing her fake ice cream, and oh!!! the way she LAUGHS when she realizes he was looking at archival baseball scores the whole time!!!

and of course, the beloved baseball date- mulder paying some random kid to put the balls in the battling machine. his hands on her hips. their faces are so close together. he talks in a silly voice on behalf of the bat. rearranging their hands over and over again. she’s giggling. “shut up, mulder. i’m playing baseball”

all of the sweet, sweet hurt/comfort in episode 22 as mulder hears wild ringing noises in his head- scully checking him for a fever and trying to get him to go to the doctor. leading him out of the room when he’s in pain. him insisting he’s okay, but being unable to form a sentence and tell skinner about what they found. her trying to cover for him when he accuses skinner of spying on them. and then scully fully believing that she can speak to him without being hurt despite the fact that he is in a padded room, violent, yelling, and inconsolable....... wow 💗