#if tfem confessions can exist others can too

[dysgoreia]

Just to reiterate:

Transfem confessions is run by trans fems just like how trans masc confessions is run by trans mascs. If you want more spaces, make them.

Just like we get harrassed for making our spaces, trans fems will get harrassed for making their spaces. It isnt easy. Thats why theres so few, because people have to weather the hatred and vitriol of people who hate trans people just the same way youre spewing hate at trans men for having community

tmes are so fucking whiny all the time you bitch and moan constantly about how you're not represented but then you have like 1000 blogs just for you. tmasc confessions, loveletters, positivity, whatever. and we only get one tfem gimmick blog (confessions one) that hardly ever updates, anyway??? fuck off.

Usually wouldn't respond to anon hate like this but. What. What could you possibly mean.

Nobody is preventing transfems from opening their own gimmick blogs!!! Why the fuck are you mad at us?? Why are you acting like this is the work of some external force???

WE run the transmasc blogs. I (a transmasc) run this blog, a transmasc runs the love letters blog, a transmasc runs the positivity blog... I'd honestly be really shocked (and actually, a little discontent) if there was a tmasc blog ran by non-tmascs.

Why are you mad that transmascs are making spaces for ourselves and then enjoying those spaces?? We've BEEN in need of places where we're finally prioritised and allowed safe to be amongst eachother because of people like YOU who constantly try to put us down for the most stupid of reasons.

Calling us whiny bitches?? Real progressive and totally not misogynistic-sounding of you. I hope you choke on a dick, you transandrophobic piece of shit.

[tfem-confessions]

So I sent in this ask https://www.tumblr.com/tfem-confessions/772075570687279104/so-im-in-a-weird-place-im-an-intersex-transfem?source=share

A few days ago and I'm just confused why people are so upset at me for just... Being upset at the state of some of the transmasculine theory online and how it does a great disservice to both transmasculine people, intersex people, and other trans people. I don't know why not liking the idea that "Trans men are incapable of oppressing others on an axis that is outside of transness who are of a minority class they are not" gets people so aggressive and cruel in response. It's genuinely so sad to see so many trans men be forced to carry on with such bad internalized transphobia that they externalize it and hurt others. Like it also hurts them I'm worried about them too, genuinely.

I do understand your complaint, and what you said wasn't hateful or bad, but it could possibly come off as a little condescending, or dismissive.

(Assuming you actually want to know why people are upset, this is my interpretation, if this is just a vent please skip.)

Saying that 'this minority group's' work/theory is so liberating while 'this minority group''s' work/theory is poorly developed, hateful and (for all intents and purposes you did heavily imply it was 'whiny' 'fixated on validating suffering') which is an existing and extremely harmful stereotype of transmascs in general comes across as extremely dismissive and biased.

To put it into perspective, it may come across the same way that a transmasc saying 'transfeminine theory is so poorly developed and is just focused on blaming everyone else for their problems', which would play on the transfems are aggressive stereotype and come across as extrmely dismissive and biased.

Your current ask doesn't come across as much better as you are dismissing their concerns by saying they are upset with you disagreeing to a stupid statement ("Trans men are incapable of oppressing others on an axis that is outside of transness who are of a minority class they are not")

When that is very much not the problem. Few people disagree with that. You said transmasculine theory on tumblr as a whole was whiny hateful and did nothing for the transmascs who very clearly do seem to get the same liberation and happiness from it as you do from transfeminine theory. And you are framing their grievances with your comment as mere hate caused by internalised transphobia (again playing on existing stereotypes of transmascs being insecure, illogical and obsessed with their feelings.

This all would most likely promote an angry response and i do think its important to a) Not frame transmasculine theory or transfeminine theory as inherently worse than the other but rather work together to come to a cohesive and fair overall understanding. and also b) To do the work to unlearn possible stereotypes which may affect the way you think, and do your best to consider your words to make sure they aren't drawing on an existing and harmful stereotype of either transfems aggressive/violent/dangerous or transmascs insecure/stupid/emotional

(Explanation over)

I'm sorry you received aggression (all I saw were 3 comments and you were anon so I'm not sure how hate reached you and therefore I don't know how to stop it) and i hope you feel better soon!

I can understand feeling frustrated by transmasculine theory if it is dismissive of your own lived reality and I hope you continue to thrive and feel happy in your chosen beliefs. I'm sorry you know so many hurtful transmascs, that has not been my experience, so I would suggest you try and make some more transmasc friends or mootsas they are on the whole generally very healthy and well rounded individuals just as transfems are.

Bye darling and I hope you have a wonderful life of peace and prosperity! If you feel the need to come here again, feel free to make an icon! (you don't have to though, it just makes it easier to keep track)