#if one of them is more attracted to women it’s not erik in my mind

[mister-peregrine]

i hoarded the @/bisexual-charlesxavier url and ngl im lowkey tempted to change it now

[clearlydiamondz]

New Partners

Erik Stevens x Black!Reader

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(Y/N) and Erik are partnered up on a mission. After getting stuck together, things get a little heated between the two.

Warning: Cursing, SMUT, 18+ Content, Semi Fight Scene, mention of infertility, self harm

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(Y/N) looked around the table with men as she rolled her eyes. So many men sitting here with their pride so far up their ass, it was showing in their face. She knew they had a problem with her being here, but it was more that just that. She was one of the best assassins this organization had to offer. They were intimidated by that. Who wouldn’t be. 

You were on of the girls that escaped the Red Room. That’s right. You were a black widow, trained along side the infamous Natalia Romanova. Better known as Natasha Romanoff. After loosing you’re home from S.H.I.E.L.D, you joined this organization. Just one thing threw it off. You were the only women here. Even though you irked something in their head, they couldn’t help but find you sexy. The only person in here who’s never given her a hard time was Erik. 

Erik was to himself. He didn’t speak to no one unless it was call for for a mission. He was just to himself.

“Good morning everyone.” Your boss Ricky came in as you put your phone away. “I’m going to keep this meeting short and simple. We heard a big deal going around the streets that some of the alien space craft parts from the attack on New York in 2012 is floating around the black market. We will be attending a bidding so that we can get those parts in our hands. Each of you guys here have been handpicked by me because you are  one of the best that we have here.” he said. 

After going her case file, she saw that was playing the role of Isabella Hardaway.  The wife of Simone Hardaway. She looked at all the information that was given to her. 

After the meeting, she was walking to her office when she felt someone tap her shoulders. She turned around seeing Erik standing there with his arms cross. It looked as if she just came back from a mission considering he had all of his tactical gear on. 

“I am going under as Simone Hardaway. Meet me at my office to discuss details before you go on lunch..” Was all he said before stepping away. She turned around walking back to her office and shutting the door. 

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Before her lunch break, she walked to Erik's office knocking on the door. She heard a come in before walking into his office. The first thing she noticed was the interior of it. Everything was black and gold. It smelled good in her, kind of like Pine Cone. And he had a lot of Wakandian artifacts. The only reason she knew about it was because back in the red room she would read all types of articles and books about Wakanda. 

“You have a very nice office..” she trailed off. 

“Let’s just talk about the mission, yeah?” he said. She nodded. 

“Sure.”

Erik was a cutie. She was always attracted to the guys who didn't say much. Due to some research, she knew it was always the niggas that didn't talk a lot knew had to handle business.

And there was nothing more than she wanted for him to handle her...

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(Y/N) rode the elevator back to the quarters that same night. It was time for them to start the plan and she was only a couple of  minutes late. As the doors opened, she walked into the building and instantly everyone's eyes were on her.

She ignored their stares as she went to the tactic room grabbing the gear that she needed. As she was signing out her equipment, Erik came beside her leaning against the wall. 

“You’re late.” he simply said as she looked up at him giving him a fake smile. She closed booklet before looking at him standing up fully. 

“Sorry but I have to look the part of a billionaire.” she said then looked at herself. “It just doesn’t happen sweet heart.” she finished before walking out the room. Erik turned around as she walked past him, looking at her backside as she walked outside the door.  

There was no hesitation that Erik wanted to have his way with her. She was fine, smart and witty. She’s been working here a little over two years now and this was the first time he could actually talk to her. Even the first time on a mission. 

They received their instructions sitting in the back of the limo, riding to the place where they were doing the bidding at. (Y/N) was looking over the notes she had tucked into her clutch before Erik spoke up. 

“You shouldn’t hide the notes in your hand bag.” he said in a suggestive tone as she looked at him. 

“I’m not. I just bring it with me so that I could go over everything before the mission.” she said folding it and tucking it under the seat. He shook his head chuckling. She looked at him raising an eyebrow. “Oh wow.. he actually laughs. Someone record this.” she said shaking her head.

“Anyways...” he trailed off turning around and looking at him. “There are somethings that you need to know about this place. It’s heavenly guarded. Metal detectors everywhere. So.. those weapons you have is useless.” he said. 

“Yeah I figured that out. But that’s why I have this.” she pulled her dress up to see a knife strapped to her thigh. Erik wasn’t really focused on the knife, more of how full her thighs looked. Damn, he wouldn’t mind being in between those thighs and getting lost. She pulled it back down, Erik not making it noticeable that he wasn’t paying attention at all. 

“A knife. You are going up against a bunch of men with guns... and your defense is a knife?” he asked pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“Oh.. you have a lot to learn my friend.” 

-----------------

They inserted the hall, their arms linked with each other. “Their holding the parts on the 5th floor but it’s heavily guarded.” They heard in their coms. 

“We need to make our presence known a little bit, then we can sneak off.” she told him as he nodded.

“Ah, you must be  Simone and Isabella, it’s a pleasure to finally meet you.” An Italian man walked up to them. Erik reached his hand out for him to shake.

"Ah, you must be Giovanni." Erik said to him as (Y/N) shook his hand.

"Oh wow, you're even beautiful in person." he winked at her. Deep inside, she was disgusted. But she had to play along with the roll.

"Oh stop, you're making me blush." she playfully said as he smirked at her.

"Well the bidding is going to start an hour so make yourselves comfortable." he said. They were left alone as Erik whispered in her ear.

"We need to get back there before they start bidding." he said as she nodded.

"I memorized the floor plan of the place. There is a hallway on the left side of the building behind the bar. It should direct us back there." she said. They saw the entrance was blocked by two guards standing there with AK-47s.

"Yeah, but those big ass niggas standing in the way." he said as she smirked at him.

"Well, all we need is a distraction." she said to him as he leaned back in the chair. "What do you mean you have a plan?"

"Just follow my lead..."

- - - - - - - -

She walked to Fabian tapping his shoulder. He turned around about to snap until he saw who it was. "Oh, Mrs. Hardaway. Is everything alright?" he asked placing his hand on her shoulder.

"Actually, one of your guests here have been incredibly rude to me. A-And it's just making me and my husband a bit uncomfortable and I really just don't appreciate it." she said shaking her head.

"Who!?"

She pointed in the direction where a man by the name of Rodney stood. She knew who he was. Rodney was one of the dudes that ran a drug ring on the West Coast near Compton. He was a hot head that didn't mind popping off on anyone at any minute.

Mixed with Giovanni, who didn't think with his head but his fist. If this was going to be a distraction, she didn't know what was.

"Aye, what the fuck Rodney!" Giovanni yelled walking over to him. "Why the fuck you're being a bitch!?" he exclaimed as Rodney eyes went wide with pure anger.

"Nigga who the fuck are you calling a bitch, bitch."

And they fell right into place. The two guards standing at the door ran to the commotion as Erik walked calmly to the back door. She followed as they ran down the hallway.

"See, easy work." she said to him as he shook his head.

"No you're just lucky that the two of them don't know how to control their emotions." she responded as she shrugged.

"Same thing." He followed her as the posted behind a wall. She turned her head to see more guards standing at the entrances. She turned to look at Erik putting up five fingers to tell him that there were five guards.

She dug into her purse grabbing the penny electricity lock before turning around smirking at Erik. She flipped it around the corner before she heard the groans.

"Yo.. you're fucking crazy." he shook his head as she smirked.

"Okay, well look where it got us." she said walking down the hall. She picked up the guns only to see that they were digitally activated. "What kind of..." she whispered looking at this.

"Yeah we can't use these." Erik said looking over her shoulder.

"Whelp the only form of weaponry is my knife so let's get this thing rolling." They grabbed the key card opening the door letting themselves inside. Erik shut the metal door before he walked in shutting the metal doors.

"I have a feeling that Ricky only sent me on this mission for the if it goes wrong because it seems like you got this figured out." Erik said leaning against the table. She dug into her purse grabbing a pair of tweezers before she chuckled. "

"I've seen you're record file, you have some pretty impressive stunt work under your feet." she said as he tilted his head to the side.

"So you stalked me?"

"No, I was just making sure that Ricky didn't put me with an idiot. And he has not." she said cutting the wires to the safe. She heard the air exit the safe before Erik opened the safe. He grabbed the piece as (Y/N) looked at it.

"That's it? It literally just looks like scrap metal." she said as he nodded.

"Well, this is what we need so-"

"Hands up!" Both of them turned around to see a guard standing at the door. "Put it down and step away from the safe." he said as she looked at Erik. He placed it on the ground before the guard walked further inside.

"Alright, lift your dress up."

"Nigga what the fuck?'

"Excuse me?"

"I'm the one with gun here, lift it up." he said as she nodded.

"You don't have to do this? I mean-"

"Shut up! Lift it." she nodded, faking pouting. She lifted up her dress before grabbing the knife aiming it at his arm than throwing it making him drop the gun.

"What the-" Erik punched him the nose the nose before flipping him on his back, grabbing his arm and bending it before she heard a crack. Before he could scream, Erik punched him again in the face as his eyes went shut and he laid limped on the floor. She grabbed the wreckage before smiling at him.

"A bunch of men with guns.. and you bring a knife?" she mocked him as he rolled his eyes.

"Yeah yeah.. okay. You can handle yourself. I like that." he said licking his lips as she raised her eyebrows.

"Don't look at me like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like that. You lookin at me with some, 'I wanna fuck you' eyes." she said as he smirked.

"Maybe I do."

"Boy bye. You wouldn't know what to do with all this even if it came with instructions. Now come on." she said walking out with a sway in her hips.

"Damn..."

- - - - - - - - -

They were outside walking to the limo when the agent on the phone started talking. "Change of plans you guys. They found that there has been a breach with the stuff. So you guys have to stay in character. We guys got you a hotel downtown." they heard as Erik mumbled a 'shit'.

"Well let's get out of here before they think of something?" he said, she agreeing. They got into the car before the limo driver pulled off.

They made it to the five star hotel and settled into their rooms before she sighed. "We don't even have clothes." she groaned as he shrugged.

"I sleep naked anyways." he said walking into the bathroom. 

“By the way, they have the room wired just in case something goes left!” she yelled out for him but he didn’t hear her. She smacked her teeth before taking off her shoes. I mean she did too, but sleeping next to him. She wasn't going to lie, she was a bit intimidated by him. But oh well. 

As she waited for him to get out the shower, she went through some paperwork she bought with her before she stripped from her gown laying it on the sofa that was in the living room. She grabbed a whiskey glass from the bar before pouring herself a glass of crown royal that Erik purchased. She drink a little more before she felt herself have a little buzz. 

  She had a wet rag wiping the make up off when he stepped out of the bathroom. She didn’t even notice the shower stopped running. He had the tower wrapped around his waist before looking her up and down. She noticed the scars that sat over his body. 

Damn that shit looked sexy... 

He wasn’t hiding that he was checking her out. His eyes traced over her frame. His tongue traced his bottom lip as he looked up at her. He looked further down noticing the scar above her abdomen. 

“What happened to you?” They both said at the same time.

“I said it first.” she said quickly, as he rolled his eyes. 

“Do you want the simple version or the extended version.” he said crossing his arms over his chest. “Extended version?”

“It’s just something that I did to myself to remind me how many people I killed. You know, never make me loose sight of who I really am. Also to remind myself of what I can become.” he responded honestly. 

“You did that to yourself?” she asked, shocked. He nodded. “And you call me crazy...” she said as he chuckled. 

“And you?”

“Do you want the simple version or the extended version?” she asked him. 

“Extended.” 

“So, I grew up in the program called the red room.” she started. 

“Oh yeah. I heard about that shit. That’s why you’re so good at what you do.. huh?” he said as she nodded. 

“Yeah, well anyways. At your graduation ceremony, we had this procedure done. They told us it was just tying tubes so you don’t mess up and get pregnant. But turns out, they took... everything.”

“Ohh...” he trailed off. “That’s-”

“Yeah, It sucks. I want my life to be more than just this. I want to have a kid one day but that’s never going to happen so.. yeah.” she responded.  

“Damn, I’m so sorry.” She didn’t want to end so awkwardly, so she used a little bit of her dark humor. Something she did to avoid having to dig into her feelings.

“But on the bright side, I don’t have periods. The sex is amazing, well depending on the person I’m fucking.” she responded as he squinted his eyes. 

“Why you say that?”

“Well, if their clean, I don’t need protection. And sex is best when it’s raw.” she winked at him.  His eyebrows raised with a sense of caution. He didn’t know if that was a sign or something, but he took it as one.

“Well, I need to get going into the shower.” she walked passed him, walking into the bathroom before turning around and shutting the door. Apart of her wished that he would turn around and follow her inside but she knew he would never do that.

She stripped naked before turning the water to a comfortable temperature. After that, she stepped in letting the water drip down her skin. The water pressure in the shower was no joke.

While she was in her own little world, lathering her body up, she didn’t even notice that Erik came into the bathroom with her. He took the towel off placing it on the sink before putting his hands on the glass. She still didn’t notice that he was in the bathroom with her. Erik wanted that.

He slid the door open, (Y/N) turning around in shock to see him standing there. Dick standing tall and him breathing hard. (Y/N) was stuck. Here he is, one of the sexiest man she has ever laid eyes on, is butt naked in the shower with her. Something took over her as she wrapped her tiny hands around his dick slowly stroking it up and down.

“You want this dick, (Y/N)?” Oh his voice was deep deep. “Once I start I ain’t going back. I plan on ruin your little ass.” he said as she looked up at him.

“That’s what I want..” she whispered to him. She leaned forward placing a kiss in his chest before making her way down, placing kisses all the way until she was face to face with the monster.

His dick was just as beautiful as him. Long and thick, a vein very noticeable and his tip leaking out with ore cum. “You want this pussy?” she asked him, putting her hand down there rubbing her clit in a circular motion. “She stay wet and ready to take some big dick like this..” she whispered kissing along his dick. He clenched his jaw as he leaned against the shower wall.

“Keep talking like that. Watch me fuck that mouth of yours.” he warned her as she smirked. She wrapped lips around the tip, swirling her tongue around it collect all of the syrup he had to offer. Sweet but tangy. She liked it.

She slowly made her way down his dick as he closed his eyes throwing his head back. “Yeah... you know what you doin. Show me what ya little freaky ass got.” he said to her. She wrapped her other hand around the base stroke it as she sucked him properly. It was nice and slow. For her sake, this man was big. Way too big to fit in her mouth. She don’t even know how she managed to get this much of him.

“You’re so big Erik.. you sure it’s gonna fit in this tight ass pussy?” she asked him as he chuckled.

“You should be asking yourself that question. I’m digging in that shit no matter-ooh.” his sentence was cut short when she started to stroke him faster while sucking his dick. “Show off then. Little nasty bitch, I love me a nasty bitch. Play with that pussy. I want the shit dripping down my chin when I eat that shit you hear me?” he said as she nodded.

“Yes sir.” Oh that made his dick jump. She noticed the little peak of excitement before smirking to herself. She focused her attention on his dick before letting him fuck her mouth. Her hands were on the floor as he grabbed her hair keeping her still as he attacked her throat.

“Fuck! Your shit is dangerous ma!” With a final thrust, he came all down her throat. It came out of no where and she coughed. She wasn’t no bitch though and swallows it.

“Swallow all that shit.” he directed her. He saw her swallow it before smirking. “Stick ya tongue out.” she stuck her tongue out before he grabbed her by the throat pulling her to her foot. Within a split second, he had his tongue down her throat. He sucked on her tongue, tongue gliding along each other as she moaned.

“I know, I’m finna play in that pussy right now. I know she’s wet.” (Y/N) stuck her tongue out once more as he looked at her confused until it finally hit him.

This is just one nasty bitch... yeah he definitely keeping up with this one.

He spat in her mouth as she smiled bringing him into a soul crushing kiss. “Go put your leg on the counter, I’m hungry and I want some of that pussy.” he told her as she smiled in content. She opened the glass door before stepping out. He followed her to the counter as she placed her leg on the counter stretching out. He walked behind her wrapping his arms around her waist. She felt his hard dick rubbing against her thighs as she leaned back against him. With his other hand, he rubbed her ass then giving it a slap.

She gasped then moaned as he smirked at you. "You like that, don't you?" he said as she nodded. His fingers traced around further before he was rubbing her clit from the back.

"You got this wet just by sucking my dick?" he asked her a she nodded.

"Yes.. I love sucking dick." she told him as he smirked.

"Yeah, slutty ass." Unexpectedly, he dipped his finger in her pussy as she gasped. Damn this nigga have some thick ass fingers.

"Shit you tight.. you sure she can take all this dick." he said rubbing his dick against her ass as she nodded.

"Yes I can take it- ooh." she moaned closing her eyes throwing her head back. He curved his finger hitting her G-Spot as she moaned.

"Fuck daddy, Right there. Shit!" she gasped out as he kissed her shoulder. His pace went faster as she felt a pressure in her abdomen. "I'm going to cum.." she whispered.

"Yeah, let me get that." he said as she smirked. A couple of seconds later, she came all over his fingers. He kept going like nothing ever happened. She was overly sensitive, and he could tell bu the slight shake she had.

"Fuck... Erik wait." she gasped as he shook his head laughing.

"Nah, all that fucking teasing you did. Keep your leg up. Don't fucking move." He bent down gliding his tongue along her folds as she fluttered her eyes shut.

Erik moaned as her wetness dripped down to his tongue. He thought it was damn near impossible for someone to be this wet but here she is like a faucet. He stood up as she placed her foot on the ground. He turned her around lifting her up and sitting her on the counter. She bit her lip looking at him as he shook his head.

"It doesn't make any fucking sense how wet this pussy is.." he said to her. He grabbed his dick rubbing his tip along the fold as he sighed in pleasure.

"Stop teasing me.."

"Don't tell me what the fuck to do." he grunted at her. He teased her a bit more before entering his slowly.

"Fuck..." she whispered out as he stretched her out. "Fuck you're filling me up."

Erik on the other hand went silent. He was in complete shock about this. He slowly started to thrust as she gripped the counter top for support.

"Good ass pussy, this my shit here. You understand?" he said as she nodded.

"Yes.. oh my god." she groaned. She put her hands between their bodies, rubbing her clit in circular motions. "Faster please." she moaned a nodded. He started to fuck her faster, the sounds bouncing off the bathroom walls.

"Fuck..."he groaned picking her up. He walked out into the room, pushing her against the wall, thrusting faster into her. She let out a loud scream before he kissed her to muffle the noise.

"Fuck baby... you beating my shit up."

"Like I'm suppose to. You hear her, making all that fucking noise." he said a she nodded.

"Talk to me."

"Yes, I hear her!" she moaned.

"Yeah, she like that shit. Slutty ass pussy.." he grunted. She bit his shoulder in attempt to keep her from screaming.

"I-I think I'm about to cum." she whispered as he smiled. "Let me feel that shit." With a tight squeeze, she released all on him as she hit her head against the wall.

"FUCK!" she groaned. Her body shook once more as he carried her to the bed. He flipped her on her stomach before arching her back.

"We not done.. far from it." he said. Without warning, he thrusted fully into her, thrusting into her at a fast pace. She bit the sheet as she moaned. Tears rolled down her eyes as she let the pleasure overwhelm her.

"What happened to me not being able to handle yo ass? What was that shit you was talking?" he taunted her. Now it was her turn to be stuck. He grabbed a fist full of her hair, pulling her back to his chest. He laid his chin on her shoulder whispering in her ear. "Answer me when I'm talking to you? You got some good dick and now you can't talk?"

"Baby.. please." she whispered as he smiled at her. Oh that shit was wicked.

"Baby please what? I can already feel that pussy tugging on my shit. You about to cum again?"

"YES!" she screamed as he smacked her ass. "Stay just like that while I bust this nut all in your guts bitch." he grunted letting go of her hair. The pressure came quick again, and within a couple of seconds she squirting all over him and the bed. She lost balance falling into the bed with him following her.

It triggered his own orgasm as he let his cum drip deep inside of her. "Fuck!" he grunted out as she spasmed a bit feeling it.

"We ain't done..." he whispered to her as she groaned.

- - - - - - - - -

Meanwhile, in the control room, the entire team was in shock. At first they were confused.

"It's silent, why can't we hear them?" Ricky said as one of the tech geeks, James, started typing away.

"Everything seem to be connected. We don't know. We can hear the shower running..." he said as Ricky stood up biting his nail.

"Maybe we should-"

"Fuck daddy, Right there. Shit!" They heard that shit loud and clear.

"Uhhh...." James awkwardly said. It was silent for a few moments before the heard smacking noises. That's when they heard a loud scream.

"Fuck baby... you beating my shit up."

"Like I'm suppose to. You hear her, making all that fucking noise."

"Should we turn it off?" James said about to push the mute button.

"Just put them on low. We can't risk not hearing anything if something happens." Ricky said, his face in utter disgust. "Jesus Christ..." he said walking away shaking his head.

- - - - - - - -

The next morning, they woke up to a loud banging on the door. (Y/N) shot up looking around to see Erik laying next to her snoring." She grabbed the robe that the hotel provided wrapping it around her body. She ran to the door to see guards standing outside of her door. She opened it.

"Oh well how can I help you gentlemen?" she asked smiling at them.

"We are reporting to all the guests that was at the bid last night. Some artifacts was stolen from us." she said as she gasped.

"What? Oh my goodness, who would do such a thing?" she asked.

"Well we suspect you two. You guys aren't really together are-"

"Everything alright baby?" Erik came into view as they looked at him in shock. Not because of his scars but because all of the hickies and scratch marks that was over his body. They took notice of the ones that you had on your neck.

"No, they are accusing of us of not being together! They think we stole some artifacts from that place. Well I tell-"

"So why were you the first ones to leave?" he asked as she scoffed.

"After that fight, we decided that it was out of control and unprofessional. We can take our business else where." she said rolling her eyes. "Y'all don't have any cameras or security. Just ghetto if you ask me."

"We did have cameras, they were all out."

"So you're accusing us of stealing? We don't need to steal."

"Do you want us to show our wedding pictures? Because we-"

"Actually Mrs. Hardaway, we don't have any more questions. We are sorry for bothering you." he said. She slammed the door in their face before turning around.

"I'm surprise you can even walk."

"Shut the hell up."

- - - - - - -

They made it back to the quarters for the briefing. After the briefing Ricky went to your office to talk to you and Erik. "First I would like to say congratulations. You guys did an excellent job." he smiled at the two.

"Well you know I always try my best." (Y/N) said smiling back to him.

"And another thing. If you know the room is wired, please be a little more quiet when you guys do the do. It's very uncomfortable." he said before walking out. (Y/N) eyes went wide as Erik chuckled shaking his head.

"I totally forgot that it was wired..." she said putting her hands in her face.

"To be honest... I realized half way through but I was like fuck it." he laughed as she threw a pen at him but he caught it. "While we're on topic, I need to finish up my report. But meet me in the quiet room in an hour. I want some more." he told her and with that he left.

Damn...

[randomshyperson]

WANDA MAXIMOFF/READER - LAND OF THIEVES - #CHAPTERTEN

Summary: When you were a child, you swore that no matter how high the reward in your head, she could always count on you. Life as an outlaw in the west is not easy, but you believe that train robberies are still easier than asking a pretty girl to dance. Land of Thieves, also know as your love story with Wanda Maximoff in the Wild West.

AO3> Land of Thieves

Warnings:  18+, explicit language, explicit violence, slow burn, childhood friends to lovers, cursing, blood. Chapters Warning: Smut is here kids.

Words: More than 50k

You wake up with Wanda entwined with you. You can get used to it, but you prefer it in a bed. At the moment, your back hurts a lot, because you two have fallen asleep on the grass, after talking all night long on the lakeshore.

Then you stretch out slightly and start stroking Wanda's hair tenderly, and she gradually wakes up.

- Good morning, love. - She mumbles huskily against your neck. You smile as you greet her back.

- We have to get up. - You tell her and let out a chuckle when Wanda grumbled unhappily.

Wanda squirmed against you, and then lifted her head with a slightly worried expression.

- Damn, you must be sore all over. - She says. - Sorry for sleeping on you.

You smile, disagreeing.

- No problem, darling. - You tell her. - I like it when you're on top of me.

Wanda smiles mischievously at your flirting, but then turns away to sit and look around. She notices that the other camp members are waking up. You sit up, and lean against the tree behind you.

- Do you think anyone will notice if we just stay in bed today? - Wanda asks humorously, adjusting her fallen suspenders and fastening them around her shoulders.

- I think your brother would have us out of bed in less than twenty minutes. - You joke, making her laugh.

She then stands up, and reaches out her hand to help you. You accept, and stand in front of her, but before she leaves, you lift one of your hands to her neck and kiss her hard.

Wanda stumbles back slightly in surprise, and then responds, her tongue asking for passage next. You sigh as you accept, and lift your other hand to her waist, as your tongues touch together.

You keep the kiss slow, and then part. You and Wanda smile with slightly swollen lips.

- Now let's get to work. - You tell her with a wink and steal another kiss before walking towards the camp.

//-//

Wanda needs to get back to Rhodes with Natasha first thing in the morning. You give her a quick good luck kiss before she leaves. And then you go to Bucky's tent.

- Hey, Buck. - You greet him as he enters. He is getting dressed and you try not to stare at the spot where his arm used to be.

- Good morning, Y/N. - He answers without turning around, looking for a shirt in his closet. - How are you?

- All right. - You answer. - I came to ask you to come with me to the reservation.

Bucky raises his eyebrow in surprise when he turns around.

- What are you going to do there?

- I would like to tell them what we are going to do. - You explain. - They should know what the government is trying to do.

- Oh, I get it. - said Bucky, buttoning up a white shirt. - I would like to go yes. Thanks for inviting me.

You smile, and give Bucky a slight nod before leaving the tent.

Steve stops on the way to the campfire. He looks tired and upset, but you can't tell why.

- Hey Y/N. - He calls out to you as he walks towards you. - Can we talk for a minute?

You nod and follow him toward the edge of the lake, a little away from everyone else.

- Are you okay? - you ask as you two stop walking. He looks down at the ground.

- I will be. - He says with a sad smile, and you frown. - Me and Bucky, we... Well, it wasn't working anymore.

- Oh, Steve... I'm sorry. - You say feeling quickly upset. You raise your hand to his forearm, and he shakes it with a smile.

- It's okay, child. - He says. - These things happen. But I didn't come to talk about it.

- But you know you can talk to me about it if you want to, okay?

Steve nods, and lets go of your hand. You smile, and put your hands in your pockets.

- I have been talking to Wanda and Nat about the moonshine scam. - He tells you. - Natasha told me what they knew about the wagon, and I ended up finding a brew that they missed. - You raise your eyebrow slightly in curiosity but don't interrupt. - We attack tomorrow afternoon.

- What? - You exclaim in surprise, but Steve smiles.

- The wagons go directly to the place of negotiation, and in order not to attract attention, the guards follow behind. - He begins to explain. - The mansion is considerably easier to enter.

- But I thought the gold was in the moonshine deposits. - You reply with confusion.

- Yes, we all do. - He said. - And then Natasha told me that she followed Mrs. Braithwaite around the house, and she has a secret room in the Mansion. We have to get in there.

- Why are the girls still monitoring the wagons in the mansion?

- Future business. - Steve says, shrugging his shoulders slightly. - Liquor businesses are lucrative, it's always good to know where they stand. We are thieves after all.

You blink incredulously, slightly annoyed.

- So Wanda and Natasha are risking themselves for nothing?

- What? Of course not. - Steve denies it and then gestures. - We couldn't have gotten this information without them.

- But after we got it, you still sent them back! - you exclaim angrily.

- Hey, calm down, will you? They're big girls and they know what they're doing. - He says. - They can take care of themselves.

- You are unbelievable. - You grumble angrily before walking away.

Steve calls you a few times, but you are furious and just keep going towards the horses. And Bucky is already waiting for you.

- Wow, everything okay there? - he asks as he watches you walk angrily, and aggressively get on your horse.

- I'm going to Braithwaite Manor. - You grumble, but then Bucky runs up to you and grabs your arm.

- Hey, girl, breathe. What happened?

- Steve is making them take risks for nothing. - You retort, trying to loosen your grip. - Wanda is in danger and I'm going to get her out of that place.

Bucky sighs and then looks at you seriously.

- Look, I know this is bad. - He says. - But you can't show up there and blow both their cover. It will put them in more danger.

- But...

- I know you're worried. - He interrupts with a tender look. - But you have to trust that they will be safe while they are inside. We can't just shoot our way in.

Bucky lets go of your arm and you feel your whole body tense up, feeling extremely nervous. And then you sigh, focusing on your breathing to control yourself.

- I need to distract myself from this. - You say after a moment. - Can we go to the reservation now?

- Of course, Y/N. - He says and then turns, heading towards his horse.

//-//

Buck is one of the quietest people you'll ever meet, but he goes out of his way to keep you distracted all the way to the Wakanda Indian Reservation in New Elizabeth. He sings a little, tells stories, and even makes jokes about his childhood, and you are immensely grateful to him.

You finally arrive in New Elizabeth in the afternoon. And at the entrance to the small town, the two of you begin to receive several curious and angry looks. You dismount from your horse together with Bucky and you lead them by the reins.

You are very surprised to find Carol on one of the benches outside.

- Hello, strangers. - She greeted you with a nod and a smile. There was a man and two women standing next to her.

- What are you doing here? - you asked after you and Bucky tied your horses and approached her.

- My investigation brought me here. - She said and then pointed to the people next to her. - This is T'Challa. - She introduced the man who gave you a brief nod. - This is Okoye. - The first woman did not smile. - And this is Shuri. - The second woman smiled at both of you and nodded.

- Sorry for the intrusion. - Bucky said. - And thank you for having us in your home.

You look a bit flustered, but nod in agreement with Bucky's words. The Wakanda' didn't seem to mind.

- Please, welcome. - T'Challa says politely. You noticed the leader's necklace he carried around his neck. - Help yourselves to some water and food.

You and Bucky smiled at the hospitality, and as Bucky sat down next to Carol and poured himself some water, you turned to the blonde.

- Are you going to tell me what you found out? - you asked, and she smiled.

- Of course, young lady. - She said. - Sit down.

You sat on the bench in front of Carol, and Okoye and Shuri waved quickly in farewell and left toward the other hollows of the reserve, while T'Challa sat on the third bench in the circle, looking at you, Carol and Bucky.

- It has come to my attention what you wish to do to help my people. - T'Challa began in a calm but serious tone. - And Carol Danvers also told me that the warrior Killmonger came to you.

- Yes, but he died before he could explain anything to me. - You say.

- Forgive me, but Killmonger would tell you only lies.

You frowned in surprise, and T'Challa straightened his posture before continuing.

- Tell me, did Erik ever tell you how he knew about the carriage? - He asked.

- He told me he refused the heist. And then he found out where it came from. - You answered, and T'Challa smiled, nodding in disagreement.

- Erik was an American soldier. - He tells, surprising you and Bucky. Carol continues eating quietly, and you imagine that she has already heard the story. - He was trying to help our people by destroying government operations from the inside, as a double agent.

- That is suicide. - Bucky commented.

- And it really caused his death. - Said T'Challa with a serious expression. - The man who killed him in Saint Denis was his captain. They discovered his treachery. - T'Challa ignored your shocked expressions and continued to tell. - Mister Killmonger refused to guard that carriage when he found out where the money was going. But he followed the soldiers anyway, to find out who was going to be the group to be paid. - T'Challa explained. - And then, he saw you stealing the carriage.

You exchanged a look with Carol, who just gave you a wry smile.

- How did he know who I was? - you asked.

- He. - T'Challa replied as he nodded slightly to Bucky. - He knew who were the children in protection of the white wolf.

- Are your people still watching me? - Bucky asked, looking surprised. - Even after all this time?

- Once Wakanda, always Wakanda. - T'Challa said with a smile. Bucky looked away, seeming impressed.

- He told me he came to me because of my family. - You said after a moment, without looking at T'Challa, feeling embarrassed.

- That's true. - he answered. - Killmonger would not trust anyone to help him other than Wakanda people. And Bucky would not accept his request, so he turned to you.

You nod, understanding the story.

- Mr. T'Challa, I would like to explain the plan about the land purchase. - You say, but the man just raises his hand slightly.

- There is no need, Carol told me everything. - He says seriously. - And my people are grateful for your concern, but I really don't see how a piece of paper changes anything.

- The land would be yours. - You say.

- The land is ours. - He says, and you bite the inside of your cheek, uncomfortably. That's not what you meant, and you really had no intention of offending the Wakanda people. But T'Challa doesn't appear upset. - We have papers, Miss Y/L/N. Many peace agreements have been made between our people and the American government. And they have all been broken.

You let out a sad sigh, knowing that he was right. But you refuse to lose hope.

- This is different. - You secure T'Challa. - The land would legally belong to you. They couldn't take you away from here.

- Oh, they won't. - T'Challa retorts with a slight wry smile. - Wakanda's not going anywhere. This land is ours, and we will die here.

- I will buy the land, T'Challa. - You tell him seriously. - Even if is only to give you the legal right to shoot everyone who trespasses here.

T'Challa laughs lightly, shaking his head. You look away from him to the fire in front of you.

- Don't worry so much about the safety of Wakanda. - He said after a moment, and then nodded slightly to the side, and you looked in the direction he showed you. Several meters away there were a number of people training with bows and spears in the open field, and you noticed that they also carried pistols at their waists. - The panthers are our protectors. We will be all right, with or without a piece of paper.

You watch one of the Wakanda people deliver a swift blow against his opponent, knocking him to the ground in the blink of an eye. It is impressive, but you know that bullets still move faster. Then you sigh knowing that T'Challa was ordering you not to get involved.

- I would very much like to help, T'Challa. But only if I have your blessing.

- I do not command your will, child. - He replies seriously, but his eyes are gentle. - I say again that you have our gratitude, but we don't want your pity.

You swallow the lump in your throat, looking away, and feeling ashamed. That's not why you were helping them, you thought they were like your people. But T'Challa has just made it clear that they are not.

- I'm sorry, T'Challa. I didn't mean it to look like I was doing that. - You say it. And T'Challa's eyes are kind when he touches your shoulder.

- Walk with me, please.

You are slightly surprised, but you stand up. And you and T'Challa begin to walk slowly around the camp.

- I am sorry for implying that you were not part of these people. - He says after a long moment. You feel your heart race, and you turn your head to him quickly. T'Challa has a smile on his lips, but does not look at you. The two of you continue walking.

- How do you know...

- I knew your great-grandmother. - He says. - She was an exceptionally brave woman. - You nod, not knowing what to say. You didn't know anyone in your family except your parents. - Tell me, child. What do you know about your parents?

You shrug, looking straight ahead.

- Nothing, really. - You tell. - I was very young when they left.

- You know that the New Austin area is protected by the panthers, right? - T'Challa asks, and you nod. - The Wakanda in that region must have answers to your questions.

- I don't have any questions. - You reply with a slight playfulness in your voice. - My parents were good people, from difficult origins. And then they died and I found a new family. There is nothing to clarify.

T'Challa smiles, and does not disagree. You walk together for a few more moments in silence, until you reach the edge of a cliff.

- I would like to tell you that you will always be welcome in our home, outlaw. - T'Challa says with a fond smile. You nod with a smile as you hold out your hand for him to shake.

- Oh, we don't do that here. - He says amused. - The Wakanda people give hugs.

You laugh as he approaches, and you exchange a quick hug.

When you walk back to Carol and Bucky, they are already saddling their horses. The two women from before are standing next to them, and exchange polite glances with you.

The younger one, Shuri, strokes your horse.

- Remember that you are welcome in our home. - Said T'Challa before the three of you rode off the reservation.

Just before you reach the Lemonye area, a few hours since you left the Reserve, you speak again:

- I need to go to Saint Denis to let Tony know about the plan. - You tell them, and give a slight nod before changing course.

//-//

It is evening when you arrive in Saint Denis, and it is particularly hot, so the town is noisy and crowded, with many people in the streets and saloons.

You ride quietly up to Stark's mansion, and frown when you find the property completely empty, all the lights off.

Riding toward the largest saloon in town, you breathe a sigh of relief when you find Tony. But you soon become irritated when you notice his current state.

- Stark. - you call out when you catch up with him at the bar. He is without his jacket, his white shirt with many buttons open, and a harlot on each side as he flips a bottle of vodka.

Tony lets out an exclamation of happiness when he sees you, jumping up for a hug.

- My friend! - he shouts as he lets go. - She came to see me, everybody!

Most of the people in the bar are falling-down drunk, but they celebrate with Stark, and then they drink again. You push Stark out of the embrace, and look at him seriously.

- What's the matter with you? I told you I didn't want to see you like this anymore.

Tony makes a fake hurt face, and then laughs.

- Y/N! It's a celebration! - he shouts.

- Oh, and what are you celebrating?

- I bought the land! - He shouts, and the crowd celebrates. You frown, and pull him by the arm.

- Tony calm down! - You tell her. - What are you talking about?

Tony blinks in confusion, but then smiles and lowers his voice as if he is telling a secret.

- Don't tell Y/N, I want to surprise her. - He says. - I bought the land from the reservation. - He tells you with a chuckle and you look at him in surprise.

- Wha-what?

- Shush. - he asks. - It's a secret. Now, let's celebrate!

And then he raises his arms, and shouts excitedly as he walks towards the center of the saloon. The pianist begins to play a lively tune, and Tony joins the crowd of dancing people.

You lean against the counter in confusion.

- What can I get for you, miss? - Tom, the barman, asks you as soon as he notices you are there.

You turn around with a mixed expression of curiosity and seriousness.

- Do you have any idea why he is celebrating? - you ask him.

- Oh, I don't. - He answers, and then points to the side. - But maybe the men who came with him know.

You look over to where he is showing you, and notice two well-dressed men sitting at one of the far tables. Each of them is holding a glass of whiskey, while two bottles are on the table.

You thank Tom with a nod and walk toward the men.

- Excuse me, gentlemen. - You say, attracting their attention. You both look slightly drunk. - Can you tell me what this celebration is about?

- Of course! - exclaims one of them happily, while the other lets out a giggle. - We just closed the deal with Mr. Stark!

You frown in confusion, but the man doesn't even seem to notice.

- We are celebrating this deal! - he says. And then you notice the briefcases, and the style of clothing. These are government salesmen.

- Sorry, but, I heard that Tony Stark was broke. - You say. - How did he buy the land?

The two men let out accomplice giggles.

- Oh, dear, you know how impulsive young people are. - he remarks. - Stark sold everything in his name. The vast majority of the money was used to pay off debts. But he secured the purchase of the land in New Elizabeth. - He tells us with a smile. - I imagine that he wanted to start his own legacy again.

- Yes, yes. Like his grandfather did. - agreed the other friend, sounding more like they were talking to each other than to you.

- Or else he will kick the savages out and buy a ranch! - retorted the man with a laugh. You held back from punching him in the face.

- I guess the little bit of money that's left will be used to pay tonight's bill! - scoffed the other man, and they both started to laugh, then went back to drinking and completely ignored your presence.

You turned toward Tony again, in disbelief that he had done all this.

And then you watched as he leaned over slightly with his hands on his stomach, only to have him vomit on a well-dressed gentleman the next second.

The man pushed Tony, who was too drunk to do anything and ended up falling to the ground. You rushed to catch up with them and grabbed the stranger's hand as soon as he raised his fist to hit Tony.

- Back off! - you warned as you pushed the man's arm against him. He looked startled, and stepped back. You turned to Tony, helping him up. - You're a mess, buddy.

Tony laughs, not really understanding what you said. You asked him to find his own coat before you took him out of the saloon. It was difficult to help him get on your horse, but eventually you succeeded. The challenge would be to keep him from falling off along the way to the camp.

//-//

You let Tony lie in your bed when you dragged him into the camp. Everyone was surprised that you brought someone completely drunk, and you were still angry with Steve, so you just nodded saying that you would tell him about it tomorrow.

And then you removed Tony's boots and jacket, and he fell asleep the moment he lay down. You frowned as you noticed a set of papers in his inside jacket pocket, and even though you didn't want to pry, you grabbed the item.

Letting out a surprised exclamation, you ran to Bucky's tent.

- What is it? - he asked as he opened the tent.

- Stark is completely insane, that's what! - you said, handing Bucky the papers.

He frowned, but his expression changed to absolute shock when he read the contents.

- He bought the land?

You just laughed, and hugged Bucky. You did it. The reservation was safe. When you let go, he read the papers again, still surprised.

- I'll take it to them. - He says in the next second. - They must have it as soon as possible.

And then Bucky ran into the tent and began to put on his boots.

- Do you want me to go with you? - you ask.

- No! - he says excitedly. - You have a job tomorrow. Don't worry, you'll have time for that later.

You let out a happy laugh, and thank Bucky again. And then you go back to Stark to see if he was okay.

You realize that you stink of booze from having to carry him around, so you sort out your bath items. You also prepare a movable mattress to place in the campfire area, since your bed was occupied.

You throw the items you have sorted on the ground at the edge of the large lake where the camp is. You are in a further area to bathe.

And when you get into the water, you hear footsteps in the woods behind you, and Wanda appears next.

- Hey. - You exclaim excitedly when you see her, and are immediately relieved to know that she is safe.

- Hello. - She replies with a smile as she sits down on the edge of the lake in front of you.

- Have you just arrived? - you ask before splashing some water on your face.

- Yes. - Wanda says with a tired sigh. - Natasha passed out on her bed. I wanted to say goodnight and Potts told me you had gone to take a shower.

You grumble in agreement, and Wanda looks around curiously.

- Why did you bring a mattress here? - She asks, noticing the object a few centimeters away from where she was sitting.

- Stark is in my bed. - You say, and smile at Wanda's confused expression. - It's a long story, but he's drunk and passed out in there.

- Okay. - Wanda laughs lightly. She lets out a sigh after a moment and then stands up, beginning to undress. You bite your lip at the image, but say nothing. You look away when she is completely naked.

She enters the water next, walking slowly towards you. She lets out a small giggle when she complains that it is a bit cold.

- By the way, Steve has just said that the job is going to be done tomorrow. - Wanda comments when she catches up with you. She frowns slightly. - I don't quite understand what has changed.

You let out an irritated sigh as you remember the conversation with Steve. And then you tell her what Steve was doing, and Wanda has a slightly incredulous expression on her face.

- I can't believe I'm exhausted for nothing. - She says and then smiles. - Natasha will be furious. - She comments and you shrug, reaching up to pull Wanda's hair from her neck and down her back. - So does Pietro.

- I was furious. - You say with a light humor in your voice, your gaze lowering to Wanda's collarbone. She lets out a chuckle.

- Really? - she teased with a smile. You just smirked. - Why? Are you worried about me?

You swallow dryly as you notice the mischievous expression on Wanda's face. Her chin is raised in defiance, and you lick your lips before speaking in earnest.

- Of course I was, Wanda. - You say as you bring your bodies closer together. It's delightful to watch Wanda lose her confident posture as you grow closer together. - I didn't want anything to happen to you. - You whisper against her lips, closing your eyes as your foreheads meet. - But I should have known you'd be okay. - You remark, dragging your face so that your mouth is at the level of Wanda's ear. - You're so brave, and strong. - You whisper in her ear as your hands go up to her waist. - Such a good girl.

Wanda lets out a sigh, and her hands go up your arms.

- Are you tired, love? - You ask her gently, but don't wait for her to answer. - Let me make you feel better.

You move your mouth down her neck, pressing wet kisses against her skin. Wanda's hands clasp your arms.

You move your mouth down her neck, pressing wet kisses against her skin. Wanda's hands squeeze your arms. You suck on a sensitive spot on her neck, and she presses your bodies together as she pulls you by your arms, and then you both let out a moan.

You pull your face away from her neck to bring your mouths together again, and then you kiss her. Wanda pushes your tongues together, as you move your hands down to her ass, and squeeze the flesh pulling her to you. The touch surprises Wanda, and she breaks the kiss with a long moan, and you take advantage of this to move your mouth down again.

Reaching up to the height of her breasts, you lower your kisses to her left nipple. Wanda raises one hand to your hair, holding you in place as you suck on the tip of her breast. She moans breathlessly, closing her eyes, and you delight in the sounds she makes.

And then you want to kiss her again, and you lift your face to the height of her mouth, bringing your lips together in a passionate, heated kiss, as your hand slides down. You scratch Wanda's belly with your fingernails, and she shivers at your touch.

You try to keep the same amount of attention on Wanda's tongue and your hand, but you are on the verge of combusting.

Your fingers move down to Wanda's intimacy, and touch her shallowly. Wanda lets out a breathless moan against your mouth, and you feel her whole body trembling. And then you begin to caress her pussy, delighting in the sensation of having her in your fingers, and Wanda is wet and hot, and her eyes roll in her sockets as you penetrate her with one finger, making her moan heavily as she lifts her hands to your shoulders and squeezes to keep herself upright.

You want to tell her she's hot as hell making those sounds as you touch her, but Wanda slides her tongue into your mouth with sensuality, and makes you lose any sense of reality.

You then change the pace of the penetrations, slowing them down as much as possible to prolong the sensation, and this makes Wanda whimper. She tries to throw her hips against you to increase the speed, but you hold her by the waist against you. You sigh as you feel her throbbing. And then you withdraw your finger, and then insert a second. You hold Wanda against you until she gets used to the sensation, and she breaks the kiss to bite your shoulder, preventing herself from screaming, although a hoarse moan escapes her throat.

- Love, is that good? - You ask tenderly against her ear, without moving your fingers. Wanda lets out a sigh against your shoulder, and then nods. You smile. - Use your words, love. - You ask, moving your fingers slowly. Wanda groans. And then you stop. - Wanda?

- Fuck. - She whispers breathlessly. - Yes, babe. That's really good.

Then you sink your fingers inside her, and Wanda moans deeply against your ear, clinging to you for stability. You move in and out of her with slowness and precision, and Wanda whimpers against your ear.

And then she is shaking, and you feel her pussy tighten against your fingers. Wanda buries her head in your shoulder, and her legs are unsteady, so you use your free hand to hold her still as your fingers move in and out of her. You kiss her shoulders gently, and when her body starts to spasm between moans, you increase the speed.

Wanda cums in your fingers a minute later, a long, drawn-out moan escaping her lips. The lake water washes her flavor from your hands, and you long to touch her again.

Wanda is breathing shallowly against your neck, and you let your hands wander down her back as she calms herself. But it doesn't take long before she pulls away only to kiss you on the mouth.

When she breaks away, her eyes are dark, and she just smiles at you, interlacing her hands and pulling you lightly off to the side. You walk toward the mattress you have brought, and she signals for you to sit down. When you do, she sits on your lap, kissing you and making you moan.

You let your hands wrap around Wanda's waist, as your tongues wrestle together. But then Wanda is pressing down, seeking more friction and you are barely able to breathe, and you moan breathlessly against her mouth, making her smile against your lips.

Wanda pushes you gently to the floor, without stopping kissing you. And in that position you can feel her hot, wet pussy against yours, making your eyes roll into their orbits. You let out a shaky sigh, and Wanda separates your mouths.

- That's good, isn't it? - She whispers against your ear, slowly rubbing herself against you. - Do you like it when I'm on top of you?

You let out a long moan, feeling Wanda move against you. And then you squeeze her waist, forcing her against your hips, and she buries her face in your neck. Wanda trembles slightly on top of you, but continues to rub her pussy against yours, and as you both let out long, moaning sobs. You move your hands down to her ass, squeezing and increasing the speed as you begin to thrust your hips against her, and Wanda bites her skin to stop herself from screaming.

The tightness below your stomach gets worse, and you are finding it hard to control the spasms in your body, but you keep going because it feels so fucking good. Wanda keeps calling your name between breathless moans, and you increase the speed.

And then you cum together a moment later, a long moan escaping from your mouths as Wanda falls against you. You move your trembling hands up her back gently, caressing her, and Wanda smiles against the skin of your neck. It doesn't take long for you to fall asleep.

[tealincubusspeckles]

Pedestal Called Love

!!!WARNING: emotional abuse, petty parents!!!

Am I too old to write diaries? Maybe, but sometimes it seems that people see James and put him on a pedestal. 

I have been to company parties where I have to pretend I don’t hear the whispers and looks of others. Similar to the attention I received under my father’s eye, I had to be mindful of everything I said and did. Ignoring others who say James is more capable than I am, how I am not fit to be at his side, and how we were using each other. According to gossip, James used me, his girlfriend and potential successor to Anderson Toys, as a means of getting an interview for the CEO position even though his degree was from a local community college. Mind you James had to alter and fabricate such things in order to seem legitimate. Gossip also says that James pretends to be engaged to me to fend off potential women and matchmakers trying to take the empire of Anderson Toys. We are engaged only because James wanted everyone to know I am his, he can be possessive like that since selfishness was a trait training taught him. Very few and often quieter commenters like to say, all I am is James’s pet whom he dressed up for company outings because I am unable to dress properly for official occasions. They don't know I am the one who will use my own money and commission or Erik or other dressmakers to make things for me. Nor do they know that I often refuse or gift James small things back if he ever buys me anything. The truth is I often have to tell James that him staying by my side and caring for me is enough. Meanwhile, others say I made James engage me because I helped him get a position or that I pay James to pretend to be with me because I am lacking. They would harshly say I lack in my looks, my money, or my cleverness. To think I graduated high school and came into the business world with petty children in adult skin is truly laughable. 

I understand I am no beauty pageant goddess and I am no Einstein, but to be talked down often makes my blood boil. They will never understand how I can call James a perfect person but not desire to be him. No one will understand not wanting to be perfect according to society. I wanna be myself and discover who that is, I want freedom. But, there will always be a conflict in me since I was raised to please others. I fight myself daily telling myself I am fine the way I am and I don't need to be reminded how I fall short of what society expects, of what my father expects. Emotional pain is deeper and unseen to the human eye, even if you claim you went through it people might say, “it’s just in your head”. People like to see and empathize with the physical pain of things, the scars of having parents should have never been parents in the first place. Fortunately or unfortunately for me, my father never did anything beyond disciplinary guidance. I was never touched where I shouldn’t have been, and feel sorry for those who have. Disciplinary action for my father was pulling my hair, pulling my ear, slapping my face, kneeling on rice for about 30 minutes to an hour, a belt or ruler against my wrist, and belts against my back. My mother would always seem shocked by these things if they happened in front of her. But, she would often not bring it up to my father if I told her. I was always grateful for the times she would tell my dad off making them explode into arguments allowing me to run away. Sometimes my dad followed me until he felt his discipline got across his message to me. Some part of my brain likes to say I see my father in James sometimes and that is why I was attracted to him in the first place. In all honesty, I can’t say that wasn’t the case. But, James doesn’t hit me or punish me like that. James is careful with me and only removes my senses when he senses I am in the mood for it. James is attentive to others since he was always taught to observe and take action when he had to.

What hurts my heart the most is how often all those comments fail to see how they isolate James. They put him so high and cater to him because he has access to a fruitful position. They think throwing themselves at him will give them the attention and favor they care about and fail to see James. Everyone only sees James for what he can do to them or for them whether it be in the company or in the bedroom. They don't see that being on a pedestal is lonely and cold. Nor do they see how expectation so high is suffocating. My father tried to make me reach a pedestal too and all I remember was the face of failure, disappointment, and self-loathing for myself. I wasn’t allowed to experiment or have dreams because my father often told me those were a waste of time, putting my head in the clouds, and how I will only get recognition when I am gone. It was humiliating and painful the way I would have to tug out my heart, bite my tongue, lie to myself, and smile for the cameras that my father would put me in front of to show off when I did well. I was placed in karate, tap dancing, piano, and summer schools at places to help ensure my grades were maintained to be part of the top three of my class. I rarely had dates because as my father said “other people of no position were a waste of time” or “your mind should be on your studies”. If I did manage to find someone, I had to have my parent's approval. If my parents or mainly my father didn’t approve they were scared away from me by my father. How? My father was a petty man who made friends or paid off some teachers to monitor my actions in school and ensure my head was in my studies. If it seemed I was slacking because of someone then my dad would pick me up from school, find the kid I was interested in, and shame the kid publicly in front of the school. For years I felt like a rat at a carnival show expected to do tricks until the crowd who was my father was satisfied. 

James had received punishment far harsher than I did for things his parents considered transgressions that I am often left speechless. They wore him down to be a diamond spike among society and left him in a position where he had to feel in control to feel validated. My existence pulled the rug from right under him because I treated him like an equal, or a friend. I often told him what is the fun in being right when life is so short? A sentiment I had gotten from Suzu and I am greatful for my friends who gave me small breaks from my puppet strings. I had to say such things because James was not above or better than me. I saw James as an equal because, like me, he sought refuge in my grandfather’s outstretched hand. Unlike me, who was ready to become a puppet to my father, James had his brothers to remind him of who he was. For that, I will be forever grateful for his brothers and treat them as my own for the rest of my days. Others fail to see how James's success is not something he could accomplish on his own. Sometimes I wish to tell those who put James on a pedestal to reevaluate their eyes. James is not a person born of just hard work, he had support and above all stayed true to himself. A self who just wants a really good book, a nice garden, a cup of something warm, and a sunny day. He is a man who tries his hardest to not be the selfish man his parents taught him to be. James is a man who is observant and around me relinquishes his control and title to just exist. I am not a slave to this man nor am I controlled by him. The days where we play master and sub are far rarer than others would have you believe. For there are days when I have to tempt this man myself to get him out of working his brain into oblivion. So pardon me for saying, James is not as great as you think he is. He is just good at observing what society expects a man to be and you don’t know him like I do. For there are times when James, who plays the role of master, needs a break to. Others don't see the side were James is the one who needs comfort and a reassuring hand. He is a living be and only wants affection, so stop chasing him as if he was a fine glass of wine and realize you need to make yourself a better person. If you think James is perfect there are others out there who society deeems untouchable but they are just like you and me. They are living beings, too.

[kilikina34512]

Loki Visits Norway

Just a little story I put together in like an hour with nothing to do but listen to a Viking playlist on YouTube. I figured since this is just writing, no real plot truly, I'd let this be my first only Tumblr post.

Pairing: Loki x fem!OC

Summary: The gods visit a clan in Norway and Loki can't help but be taken by one of the women he sees.

Warnings: mentions of battle and smut, nothing graphic.

Word Count: 892

The music was as loud as the cheers.  The Vikings were celebrating the visit of their gods, Thor and Loki.  Any time they appeared, the clans would throw them a huge feast in honor of them.  While both gods would join in the festivities, it had always been Thor who enjoyed it more than Loki.  He wasn't usually the one to grab a tankard of mead and drown himself into idiocy like most of the men around him, he did enjoy the chaos that resulted from the drunkards' actions.  

Just before the crowd could grow too rambunctious, Erik, the jarl, rose from his throne and raised his tankard up, yelling to attract everyone's attention.  "It is with great honor that we are the clan to host our glorious gods this eve!"  Loki relaxed back in his seat to the right of Erik as he waited impatiently.  He wasn't one who enjoyed long speeches and he hoped this jarl was less wordy than the last one they'd visited.  Erik was a slightly smaller version of Thor, blonde and bulky, but with a braided beard that hung down to his pectoral muscles.  A long, pink scar ran along the side of his left cheek, standing out against his pale skin.  The man was the picture of paleness, even down to his eyes, so blue, they were almost grey.  Draped in furs, the jarl continued.  "The Ravne Clan will forever have open arms to any of the gods of Asgard that wish to grace our halls!  To express our gratitude, the women of our clan have prepared a dance to entertain us with this eve, led by my dottir, Brenna."

As the jarl sat, the musicians began playing.  Women from around the main hall moved forward until they were circling around the large fire in the center.  Front at center to the main table was a lithe woman that had Loki's attention instantly.  Something about her called out to him and he sat forward, his attention on things happening renewed.

As the women began a traditional dance circling around the fire in tune with the soft beat that the bards were playing, he watched who he could only figure was Brenna.  While they both had pale, tall, slender frames, that was where the similarities ended.  She was otherwise his complete opposite.  Where he had hair as dark as night, hers was the shining golden blonde of sunshine.  His bright green eyes couldn't help but notice her dark brown eyes, the same color of chocolate.  While he was full of sharp features, her face and body all appeared soft.

The women continued to spin round and round, yet his eyes drifted to no other.  Her body moved gently with the music, almost as if it had been created specifically for her, attuned perfectly to match her soul.  He was enraptured by the sway of her hips, which despite her thin size, still had the perfect curve to them.  He ached to run his hands along her, grip them tight as he drove into her until her pale color was adorned with purple marks that matched his hands and an ache between her thighs that left her both sated and craving more.

Suddenly, the soft music began to pick up more base and speed.  Loki noticed some of the women drift back into the crowd until only a handful were left, Brenna still in the front.  They turned as one to face the main table where the gods sat.  In the back of his mind, the God of Chaos and Mischief noted that the music was sounding less and less melodic and more like the beats of battle.  

A war song, that's what the music had transitioned into.  As it picked up, he watched the women unsheathe weapons of various swords and axes.  The jarl's dottir appeared to be a fan of the longsword.  Brenna led them as they moved their blades through the air with grace and strength, a fierce look on her face.

"I cannot say that I have seen ladies perform a battle dance before," he heard Thor say from the other side of the jarl.

"Brenna insisted," Erik explained.  "The women of our clan are quite bloodthirsty creatures, my daughter especially.  I have a hard time keeping her at the clan.  She says the chaos of battle sings to her soul."

Loki could see it.  The way Brenna's eyes lit up as she moved with her sword.  While he wasn't quite as bloodthirsty as Thor, he couldn't say that he didn't enjoy battle either.  Much like her, the chaos of the battle around him called to his nature, sung to his soul.  

He wanted to join her beneath her furs.  Their joining would be frenzied.  Their passion would burn brighter than the fire they danced in front of.  

As the music came to an end, so did the swaying of their bodies and weapons.  Brenna stood tall, the ghost of a smile on her face and mischief dancing in her eyes as her gaze met and held Loki's own.  The slight lift of her golden eyebrow had him smirking.  The chaos of her soul matched his own, he could feel the pull between them and knew she did too.

Oh yes, this would definitely be a feast to remember.  He knew, without a doubt, that he'd spend his evening with her.  

[uzumaki-rebellion]

“Black Boys Bloom Thorns First: Volume 3, Chp. 9″

"Black Butterfly, sail across the waters Tell your sons and daughters what the struggle brings Black Butterfly, set the skies on fire Rise up even higher So the ageless winds of time can catch your wings"

Deniece Williams – "Black Butterfly"

Disa spotted Pamela in the middle of the floor.

The moment the beat hit her ears, Pamela threw her head back and tossed her ass in a circle letting Disa know it was good to go.

The beginning was always the difficult part of her sets when she was trying to create a montage of feelings through sound. There were peaks and valleys she had to hit in order to hold the audience hostage. She almost lost it halfway through Zana High Life when the host shouted out DJ Geechee Dan standing on the side of the stage. Disa had been trying to find him up in the VIP section and he was right there, less than twenty feet from her watching her cut up a live mix.

It was Erik that saved her from bumbling her set as she focused on him moving instead of Geechie Dan being so near her. He came out of nowhere and she had no idea he could dance so well. The boy showed out and Pamela tried to keep up. It brought a smile to her lips to see him grab her homegirl and dance Pamela around. No one had ever been able to hang with her, and Erik pushed the woman to go all out.

Disa reeled everyone back in when she let Erik's voice quote "Beloved" over the music. He matched the tone of the syncopated beats. It sounded romantic. Dreamy. She took a respite and let the mix play as she watched him dance. So fluid. Like water. She knew he practiced capoeira and decided to go off script and freestyle her set. Dragging down some berimabau sounds, she cued up a Brazilian jam and dropped it on top of her own drumming in time to the stringed instrument. It struck like a thunderbolt on Erik and it shocked her to see him backflip and hold his body in a handstand as his legs moved in slow motion before he crouched on the floor low and swayed to the ancient sounds.

The boy was bad.

Loose hips and expressive arm movement fooled everyone into thinking he was just jamming instead of showing off a martial art. Disa was in awe and almost missed her next transition cue because she was so mesmerized by him. How could that brainy, standoffish, and arrogant man-child turn into a snake-hipped God of the dance?

Pamela jumped back on him and Disa played with them both by skipping her planned closing and taking the two of them to the Black Queer spaces she roamed with Pamela and friends. Punching up the voice of the icon Selvin Mizrahi, aka MC Debra, Disa brought in ballroom beats.

"That shouldn't have been the question," echoed about the space and Pamela stopped dancing with Erik and pointed a finger at Disa.

"Don't play with me, bitch!" Pamela shouted before she dropped to the floor and duck walked like the diva she was. This attracted their other homegirl Tatum who dipped several times making Yamilet stand aside with weak knees. Pamela played with Tatum in a simulated ballroom battle over Erik's attention until Tatum pushed Pamela aside and twirled around the youngster capturing his attention. The audience roared when Erik dropped into his own duck walk challenging Tatum. Erik's friends howled and the entire venue lost it when he dipped three times in front of Tatum making her storm off in a pretend huff as he duck walked after her before spinning on his back and shoulders. He grabbed Tatum's hand and ground on her ass with the closing notes of Disa's set. Loud whistles and claps erupted, and she waved to the crowd before the lights switched over to the next DJ who looked frightened at the prospect of following up after her.

Tatum rushed over to her swiping back long strands of crimped and twisty hair.

"Girl, your lil man was out here giving what he was supposed to give! Is he…?"

"Erik? No, I don't believe so."

"He was putting that thang on me like he wanted a piece of the good, Sis. He grab on me again like that and I'll let him get a taste."

Tatum's dark brown eyes were glossy from drinking and she followed Disa as she carried her crate of vinyl to the green room.

"He's not the type to turn mean if he knows….y'now…" Tatum said.

"He's very open. I don't think he'd trip to know you're Trans."

"Good. Cuz he could get it from any of these women out here. Did you see him move? I know Pamela is butt hurt that she was not the center of the dance universe tonight."

Tatum watched her tuck her crate under a covered table and push them far back with her jacket on top of it with her computer bag.

"I liked how you closed out your set."

"People liked it, yeah?"

"Yeah, but I worry cuz you know how these niggas be wildin' if you bring in the Fam in hetero spaces. Everybody turns into homophobe and kills the vibe for everybody."

Disa's cell buzzed. She pulled it from her back pocket.

"Yamilet and them. She's out by the car now."

Disa dragged her crate back out and Tatum carried her computer bag for her. They headed outside to the parking lot. Yamilet was there with Pamela, and Essie. She opened her trunk and Disa dumped her stuff. The women gave her joyous hugs and high fives before they traipsed back in to catch the other DJs.

Erik ran up to her breathless.

"Hey! I thought you were leaving!"

Disa patted his arm.

"No, just putting my gear away. Erik, these are my friends…"

She introduced everyone, and Erik shook their hands. Tatum and Pamela gave him big hugs and Yamilet snapped her fingers at him.

"Geechie… Hey! Geechie Dan, hold up!" Erik shouted.

Disa's heart dropped in her belly. Erik shook her idol's hand and brought him over to Disa.

"This is Disa Abdullah-Woods, your biggest fan," Erik said.

"My dear, sweet, woman, you are a master class of gifts. That set was-"

Geechie Dan kissed his fingers to end his praise.

Disa held out a trembling hand to him.

"No, that's not gonna do, Buttafly. Bring it in," he said opening his arms wide.

Disa burst into tears.

"Hey, I'm nobody to cry over," he whispered.

Geechie Dan gave Disa a big hug, and she stood there like a blubbering baby. The years that she spent practicing what she would say to the man if she ever met him in person went straight out the window. She used to laugh at people who became overly emotional meeting celebrities, but now she totally understood the overwhelming feeling that surged through her.

She wiped her eyes and Erik rubbed her back with gentle circles.

"I've been a fan since I was a little kid," she stammered out.

"Erik here told me. I told him how much I enjoyed his dancing and he just went in about you."

A crowd surrounded Geechie Dan, but he ignored them, his twinkling eyes on her.

"It has been a long time since I've seen a DJ create a set with so much intention behind it. You have something special in you, young lady. Never lose that gift."

Disa's mouth seemed to lose all ability to work. All the things she wanted to say stalled in her throat. He was there in the flesh. Standing in front of her.

"Disa has a radio show you should go on," Erik suggested.

"Oh yeah? Give me your number. I'll call you up and we can chop it up."

Geechie Dan pulled out his cell and Disa gave him her number, her voice a soft shell of its usual assertive tone.

"When I get some free time, I'll hit you up. Excuse me, they want me back up on stage. Amazing set, Disa. Keep spinning!"

The man shook her hand with both of his and his entourage and promoters swept him away.

"She's still in shock," Yamilet said waving her hand in Disa's face.

Erik's bright smile attracted her attention. Had he not spoken to the man, Disa may very well have missed her opportunity to meet him, let alone remember to ask the man for a radio interview. Her mind floated with the surreal nature of the experience. Her cell buzzed.

Here's my number. I'll be in New York in a few weeks, would be open to an in-person radio interview.

Geechee Dan's personal cell number. She had it. In her palm.

Disa reached out and grabbed Erik's shoulders. She planted a big fat kiss on his lips.

"Damn, what was that for?" he said.

"Being here," she said.

He wiped his lips and smiled.

"Erik…"

Chloe slinked up and slipped her arm in Erik's, tugging him towards the dance floor. Disa watched him enter the thick crowd of swaying bodies to dance once more.

###

Her night was a dreamy success.

Disa stayed in a popular hotel with her friends, and they hung out in the bar. Erik strolled into the lobby with his friends. In a tipsy stupor, Disa walked over to him with a fresh drink in her hand. "Didn't know you were staying here too," she said.

He took the drink from her and sipped it down.

"Hey… you can't drink this here out in the open, you're underage!"

She snatched it away from his lips.

"Nah, it's after midnight… I'm twenty-one now," he said.

"Oh, shit. It's your birthday? Today?"

"Yep."

"Happy Birthday, Erik!"

She hugged him tight and gave him the glass of liquor.

"Enjoy," she said.

"What room are we in?" Jace asked.

Erik's dorm companion looked sleepy along with two other guys.

"301," Erik said handing Jace a key card.

Disa's friends called for her to return to the bar counter.

"Come celebrate with us," she said pointing to her group.

"I'm beat, to be honest. Thanks for asking me though."

"If you change your mind, we'll be down here."

"Good to know."

"Thanks for everything, Erik. Tonight was really special and meant a lot to me. Especially with you hooking me up with Geechie Dan."

"Glad to make your dream come true."

His eyes penetrated hers.

"Okay grown-ass man, go to bed," she said pushing on his arm playfully.

"You're drunk," he teased.

"A happy one at that," she said stumbling off to join her girls.

Three more drinks later, after a heated discussion with a group of men who hovered around them trying to interject their unwanted opinions about dating, Disa leaned over the bar counter and asked for a special birthday cocktail for Erik. She went to the lobby restroom, collected the drink afterward, and excused herself from her friends. She took the elevator to the third floor and found Erik's room. The fruity exotic drink had a lot of strong liquor in it. Knocking on the door, she waited for someone to answer. She could hear a tv on and talking going on inside.

Kelvin, a cute nerdy string bean answered the door.

"Is Erik up?" she asked.

Kelvin's eyes nearly popped out looking at her.

"You were so good," he yelped.

"Thank you… um… Erik?"

"He's not here."

"Not here? Did he go out?"

"No, he's in that room," Kelvin said pointing across the hall to room 302.

"Thanks," she said.

Kelvin closed the door and Disa did a one-eighty and rapped her knuckles on the new door. She toyed with the blue umbrella and pineapple garnish on his drink. Erik answered. Shirtless and wearing tight gray boxers.

"Hey," she said.

"Um… Hi. 'sup?"

"Birthday drink. A proper one."

She thrust it out to him and tried to brush past him, but he held an arm up in the door jamb blocking her. Her brain failed to register that he didn't want her inside, and she bumped against him, her breasts touching his chest.

"I can't come in?"

"I have someone here," he said.

Her eyes cut behind him. Chloe was draped in nothing but a sheet, the tops of her breasts threatening to spill over her arm that clutched the covers.

"Oh, snap. I'm sorry. I thought you were staying with the guys over there. Didn't realize you had your own room. Here, enjoy the drink," she said.

Erik took the bulbous glass, and his expression was full of embarrassment. He stepped into the hall and closed the door behind him. Disa stepped back from him and fumbled with her hands.

"Handle your business. It's time for me to get to bed myself… get some sleep. Have fun!"

She tried to sound jovial, but something in the back of her throat made her voice accusatory. As if she caught him doing something behind her back. For months she thought of Erik as her little pet. He was her loyal puppy, and she had to admit she enjoyed all the fawning he did over her. But he was also a young man with needs. She tried not to look at the package that was hanging in his underwear. The outline of it was showing off. God forbid if he was a grower too.

"Me and Chloe kinda got this thing going on now…"

"New girlfriend and good birthday sex is a blessing. Night Erik."

She turned to leave and pivoted back to him.

"Can I put on a birthday dinner for you and your family? I know you're planning on eating at Toulouse, but I would love to host your birthday party at my place."

"That's too much Disa. I have a lot of people coming in from all over."

"How many?"

"Fifteen—"

"Pfft, boy, you've been to my dinner parties, you know how I get down. Fifteen is nothing for me."

"The cost alone will be crazy—"

"Let me handle that. You deserve a special day. You made my night amazing, let me show my appreciation. What would you like to eat?"

Erik's eyes grew thoughtful, they dropped to look at his drink.

"I love your Confit de Canard,"

"Aw, I see. I finally got you to give in to duck meat."

"It's gonna be hella expensive."

"Don't worry about it. Let's say six sharp on Saturday, three courses and Turkish coffee with a birthday cake."

His eyes lit up.

"I'll let my people know."

"Tell them to dress up. I'll plan a splendid evening with games afterward."

Erik grabbed her hand and pulled her in close.

"Thank you," he said.

"Better get back to Chloe. Don't want her chewing my head off for keeping all of this out of the bed."

She smirked at him and wandered down the hall.

###

Chloe had a frown n her face when Erik walked back into the hotel room.

"What did she want?"

"Birthday gift," he said holding up the fancy drink.

He sipped it, and the liquor was too strong for his tastes. It would knock him out before he had a chance to smash Chloe. He put the glass on the nightstand and pulled off his boxers. His dick was already at half-mast.

"Why is your dick like that already?"

Chloe sat up, and the frown on her face deepened.

"Looking at you gets me excited," he countered.

Hopping into the bed, he pulled back the sheets and swiped her nipples with his tongue.

"You're attracted to her."

"Disa? That's my homegirl—"

"Everyone knows you have a crush on her. You turn into a puddle whenever she's around."

Chloe folded her arms over her breasts blocking his access.

"If your dick is getting hard for her, maybe you should get some birthday sex from her instead!"

"Chloe. Stop trippin'. I'm giving this dick to you."

He rubbed the hardening length against her thigh. She slapped it.

"Wanna play rough?" he said.

"Was your dick hard for that Trans chick too?"

"What?"

"Disa's friend. The one with the long fluffy hair. You didn't know?"

"No. She fine as fuck though."

"You'd fuck a Trans woman?"

There was disgust on her face.

Erik sat up. He'd been around Trans women and Trans men all his life, especially in Brazil. He had a Trans play uncle in Sao Paulo who used to babysit him and his play cousin Marisol.

"A woman is a woman. She got titties I can play with and a hole I can fuck, I don't see a problem—"

"Ohmigod! You really would fuck her."

"That ass was amazing."

"I can't believe you're serious!"

"Are you a queerphobe? Cuz if you are, that's not gonna work for me."

"No… I just… I can't picture you being like that."

"Like what?"

"Accepting. You're like a man's man—"

"A Transphobe? I wasn't raised like that. My mother would never let me treat people like shit who didn't deserve it."

Chloe stared down at her hands.

"I'm glad to hear that, actually."

"Yeah? Why?"

Her eyes welled up.

"My sister… she's transitioning… he's becoming my brother and I worry about him going up against guys like you."

"Guys like me?"

"Y'know overly masculine. He's coming to visit me in a few weeks and I wanted you to meet him since he's interested in capoeira."

Her eyes met his.

"I didn't mean to be accusatory about Disa's friend. She's beautiful. Prettier than me."

"You're the prettiest woman in this room right now."

She slapped his hand and smiled.

"But you do like Disa. Right?"

"She's my friend. I had a big crush on her when I first arrived on campus, but now… she's like a mentor… a big sister. We're close and she teaches all kinds of cool stuff. I probably do act all goofy when I'm around her—"

"It's cute… really. I just… let's forget about it."

He kissed her. With guilt. Disa meant more to him than just a big sister or a mentor. She was the ultimate woman. But she would never see him as a man.

Chloe wrapped her lips around his dick and rolled a condom on his shaft after she plumped him up to complete hardness. She presented her backside to him and he sank into her walls and pumped, enjoying her soft sighs and cries of passion. He took off the condom much later as she allowed him to fuck her raw in the ass and dump a hot load in her anal walls. She kept his mind off of Disa and those lush breasts that truly made his dick thicken and visibly tell Chloe the truth. Disa was his dream girl. Everyone could see it.

###

The large package arrived at Disa's house the day before Erik's birthday party. She called him on his phone to tell them that a big box with a D.C. return address and B. Dunduza written in black block letters was sitting in her living room.

He drove over to her house, and Disa watched him tear it open. There was a note on top of the bubble wrap.

"Kept these in storage for you. We wanted to wait until you turned twenty-one to have them. Cherish them as we cherish you."

Uncle Bakari and Auntie Shavonne both signed it.

Erik removed the layer of bubble wrap and his heart nearly stopped.

He fingered the old dark brown leather, and a breath shuddered out of him.

"Erik? You alright?" Disa asked.

She put a hand on his shoulder as he lifted the leather-bound journal from the box.

"These are my father's journals," he whispered.

Opening the first journal, he recognized the careful Wakandan script written by his father's powerful hand. They taped a small piece of bubble wrap on the page. Erik unraveled it and gasped before falling on his backside.

"What is it?" Disa asked, rising concern coloring her voice

Opening his fingers, Erik stared at the wondrous gift.

His Baba's ring. Attached to the chain his mother bought for him as an anniversary gift. The chain his father wore the night he was killed by King T'Chaka.

His family birthright.

Now his.

Chapter 10 HERE

###

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[diwatera]

LGBTQ+ Movies I Watched Recently (Part 2)

Happiest Season (2020) dir. Clea DuVall

Short Summary: Abby plans on proposing to Harper when they visit Harper’s family for the holidays. Her plans get derailed when she learns that Harper hasn’t come out to her family yet.

Why you should watch it: Not gonna lie, Mackenzie Davis drew me to this movie; I’ve been in love with her ever since San Junipero came out. Add Kristen Stewart, Aubrey Plaza and Dan Levy to the mix and I’m sold. If you want a sapphic romance with a happy ending, this one’s for you. 

Été 85 (2020) dir.  François Ozon

Short Summary: Alexis recounts his six-week love affair with David during the summer of ‘85. 

Why you should watch it: If you love 80s aesthetic and music, you definitely should watch this. The movie made me nostalgic of that decade and I wasn’t even alive back then! It’s a whirlwind summer romance reminiscent of Call Me by Your Name but with a more devastating twist.

Getting Go: The Go Doc Project (2013) dir. Cory James Krueckeberg

Short Summary: An obsessed college boy pursues his internet crush through the pretext of making a documentary about him.

Why you should watch it: The script and the acting are the one-two punch of this film. The writing is incredibly genuine, and both of the actors’ performances made the lines feel even more natural. I’m not the biggest fan of mockumentary-style films, but this one felt like it was a recording of my own life. Hyper-obsessive college grad with a Tumblr blog? Might as well have called out half the population of this damn site.

Pihalla (2017) dir. Nils-Erik Ekblom

Short Summary: Miku and Elias find themselves, and each other, during a summer in the Finnish countryside.

Why you should watch it: I’m a sucker for gays in the countryside™ and although this one is not quite up there with God’s Own Country and Call Me by Your Name, it still makes for a good watch. Miku as a character and his relationship with his parents was chaotic and fun. His relationship with Elias felt really natural and dreamy. 

You, Me and Him (2017) dir. Daisy Aitkens

Short Summary: Olivia, a mature responsible lawyer, wants to have a baby, but her girlfriend Alex isn’t ready for the responsibility. Things get even more complicated when their flirty neighbour, John, joins the picture. 

Why you should watch it: It is one of the most feel-good lesbian romcoms I have seen in a while. But I warn you, there are some dark parts that can really sneak up on you. Yeah, it’s hilarious, but damn it made me ugly cry, too. Oh, and if you want to see David Tennant as an alpha male douchebag, here’s your chance. (CW: **spoiler alert** p̶r̶e̶g̶n̶a̶n̶c̶y̶ ̶l̶o̶s̶s̶ )

Giant Little Ones (2018) dir. Keith Behrman 

Short Summary: Franky and Ballas have been best friends since childhood, both on the swimming team, both incredibly popular. But after an incident during Franky’s birthday, they quickly fall apart and Franky falls from grace.

Why you should watch it: I think the film captures just how tumultuous coming-of-age stories are. Franky is going through his own journey of self-identity, and I’m happy that the movie didn’t rush in with labels. The conversation Franky has with his dad at the end also hits hard.  (CW: physical assault, allusions to sexual assault)

Our Love Story (2016) dir. HyunJu Lee

Short Summary: A fine arts student meets an attractive bartender, and the two women begin an intimate relationship.

Why you should watch it: It’s a very intimate love story that isn’t rushed or dragged out for too long. We definitely see Yoon-Jo and Ji-Soo’s relationship bloom from start to end, but it’s not mind-numbingly boring to watch. Raw and unembellished, I definitely recommend this to anyone looking for a realistic portrayal of wlw romance.

Die Mitte der Welt (2016) dir. Jakob M. Erwa

Short Summary: The film follows Phil and his relationship with his family, his best friend, and a newcomer at his school, Nicholas.

Why you should watch it: This is technically a second watch for me, and I’m glad I rewatched it, because I was able to catch some glaring red flags that I missed the first time. I love this movie in spite of all the heartache it caused me. The story, especially the deal with Phil’s family, struck a chord in me. And the shots! Visually stunning as well! 

Les Amours Imaginaires (2010) dir. Xavier Dolan

Short Summary: Marie and Francis’ friendship is put to the test when a beautiful boy called Nicolas comes between them. 

Why you should watch it: Watch it for the visuals -- the colors, the costumes, the cast. Seriously, the actors included here may as well be kept in the Louvre: Xavier Dolan, Neils Schneider, Monia Chokri, hell, even a cameo from Louis Garrel! Dolan said it himself that this is a shallow film, but it’s worth the watch just to see Neils Schneider wearing heart-shaped glasses.

Closet Monster (2015)  dir. Stephen Dunn

Short Summary: A creative and driven teenager is desperate to escape his hometown and the haunting memories of his turbulent childhood.

Why you should watch it: Right off the bat, I am going to say that this film is dark. I tried watching it back in college but tapped out within the first ten minutes because something traumatic happens. Then I tried again about a week ago, finished it this time. It’s actually a very moving film. It’s violent and gory in some parts, but also ridiculous and wholesome in other parts. IT HAS A TALKING HAMSTER NAMED BUFFY! BUFFY WAS THE STAR OF THIS MOVIE FOR ME. (CW: gay bashing/sexual assault)

Straight Up (2020) dir. James Sweeney

Short Summary: Todd and Rory are intellectual soul mates. He might be gay but she might not care.

Why you should watch it: The dialogue in this film is undeniably sharp and witty. Loved the fast-paced back and forth between the two main characters as they discuss relationships, sex, gender, and more. James Sweeney and Katie Findlay’s chemistry just pulled you into the screen. It was funny, it was sweet, it was heartwrenching, it was great! (CW: allusions to sexual assault)

Latter Days (2003) dir. C. Jay Cox

Short Summary: A promiscuous gay party animal falls for a young Mormon missionary, leading to crisis, cliché, and catastrophe.

Why you should watch it: I saw this in santiagonex’s top 20 LGBTQ+ films with happy endings, and I honestly thought it was gonna be a feel-good watch. Instead, I got a rollercoaster melodrama filled with early 2000s gay culture, religious guilt, buttcheeks, and Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Needless to say, I got more than I bargained for. (CW: self-harm, conversion therapy)

The Old Guard (2020) dir. Gina Prince-Blythewood

Short Summary:  A covert team of immortal mercenaries are suddenly exposed and must now fight to keep their identity a secret just as an unexpected new member is discovered.

Why you should watch it: Okay, I was debating whether I should include this here, because it’s not necessarily an LGBTQ+ film as much as it is an action film with queer characters. I decided to include it, because JESUS! I have never seen such respectful and well-written representation of queer characters and relationships. Joe and Nicky are the most unproblematic couple in history. PERIOD. Pray for sequels, everyone. This is the kind of representation we deserve in mainstream media. 

. . .

Click here for more LGBTQ+ film recs

[do-y0u-have-to-let-it-linger]

EXT. The Roof (Winter) - Sunset

Not Just Attracted to Women!Peter Maximoff x Fem and Not Just Attracted to Men!Reader

Based off of a dream I recently had: Peter and Y/N have a conversation on the roof of Xavier's in mid-December. Peter accidentally lets it slip that he might not be straight, and he is afraid that Y/N will think less of him because of it because this is the 80s. Y/N reveals that she is also not straight, and is saddened by the fact that Peter could think that she could ever hate him- especially for that. She calls him wonderful. Feelings ensue. Also, a touch of Cherik at the end because I give the people what they want.

Warnings: Swearing, Peter cries, internalized homophobia (this is the 80s-ish and Peter uses the word 'queer' in a kind of incorrect and kind of offensive manner, but it was internalized homophobia and not actually intended to be mean to anyone but himself so I forgive him), a touch of angst but mostly fluff, Charles called you two "children" even though you are obviously not, Erik is happy that his son has someone that cares about him the way you do, Peter is insecure but not super blunt about it, Peter has been deprived of being adored his entire life, bad writing, I mention a serial killer twice, historical inaccuracy because the word queer was still a slur so yeah.

A/N: This is literally the first thing I have ever written so please be nice to me, I wrote this instead of an essay. I would love a comment of any kind, even if it's just a heart emoji or something, and constructive criticism would be highly appreciated. Also 'N/N' stands for nick-name.

(Ok, so, full discloser: the format is odd. The bullet points represent dialogue, and the only dialogue is between you two love birds. The first bullet point is Peter, the second is Y/N, the third is Peter, and so on.)

“I dunno, the whole ‘liking people’ thing has always been weird for me.”

“How do you mean?"

“Pppffftt- 'how do you mean,' what are you, Shakespeare or somethin’?”

“Yeah, because that’s the era when ‘how do you mean' would have been a popular term. Ok, what do you mean?”

“Just- when other people were liking people I never really was?”

He was gesturing wildly and avoiding eye contact, as always. He wasn't uncomfortable with eye contact, he just got bored easily in conversations, he needed to keep himself occupied. In this situation that meant staring at the red and green lights covering the rest of the roof, the snowy trees all over the yard, and a holly garland around the gate. Peter wasn't Christian, but man, did he love their Christmas decorations.

“Like… now? In school?”

“Well- yeah… but also when I was younger. And I never liked the right people? Or... liked them in the right way?”

“So you’ve never liked anyone.”

“No, no… I definitely have. It was just… weird! I don't-”

His hands dropped to his side in defeat.

“I don’t think it’s that out of the ordinary. I would tell you if it was. Also, if it was... 'weird', like you said, that wouldn’t mean it was necessarily bad.”

He hadn’t really heard what she said, he was too busy pondering what his next sentence would be. When she wasn't speaking, he was rambling.

"I had some of the normal crap… like in movies when they talk about the fluttery stomach junk. I've had that around a few girls I've been friends with, also that phase with the boy stuff, a-"

“Wait, what phase with the boy stuff?”

“Like- when you’re in middle school or whatever and you're gay for a second.”

His phrasing was a joke, but the statement as a whole was not.

“…‘Gay for a second’?”

“…Yeah?”

“Hmmm..."

"Is that- not-"

"I don't think that is... 'normal'... per-say..."

“Oh… Really?”

His heart sunk.

“…Yeah.”

“Huh.”

“…Mhm.”

“…Shit.”

He suddenly looked almost embarrassed. He shifted his posture, seemingly trying to shrink into himself.

“Do you... wanna chat about it?”

Panic started to slowly rise in him.

“Um- forget I said anything.”

“Why?”

Something in him said to go on the "defense". He did not appear as calm as he was intending to.

“I’m not- gay! or anything. I like girls! I do!”

She put her hand on his arm.

“Hey- look at me for a second. We are not in court, and I never 'accused' you of being gay. That would be a very funny reality TV show, but not what is happening right now. Listen, theoretically if you were gay that wouldn’t be bad! And I wouldn’t be… whatever you.. think that I would be? I mean- however you are afraid I would act in a negative reaction to it? I would try to be here for you, and be as supportive as possible.”

He didn’t believe her.

“Ok, sure.”

“Peter.”

“What? You’re going to tell me that you would honestly be friends with a queer person- be friends with me if I was... not... normal?”

She was taken aback by his tone, the word he had used, and the way he said it, felt like a weight dropping on her shoulders.

“Oh. would you… not?”

It was her turn to seem nervous.

“What?”

“Would you- stop being friends with someone for liking someone that they… I don’t know… shouldn’t... would be the word I guess?”

Why, in this situation, was she nervous? Oh. His fear was replaced with guilt.

“No.”

“Ok.”

“So… are you… do you… why were you scared?”

“... Why were you?”

She expected a joke from him, something along the lines of “touché".

“Are you… gay?”

“No.”

Yeah, he didn’t believe her.

“Uh-huh”

“Really, I’m not. I’ve liked boys, but also... I've had feelings for girls. I’m not… straight. So I just want to let you know that it’s okay if you aren’t too.”

“I never s-“

She smiled at him with a bit of pity, she had been there. The self-loathing, the feeling of walking on minefields with so many people in your life.

“You are…”

She paused.

“I am… what?”

“Give me a second I’m trying to find the perfect word.”

“… Okay?”

“Wonderful.”

That was not exactly the word he was expecting. Like, at all.

“Huh?”

“That’s the word. Wait- let me start over. You gotta look me in my eyes as I say it, because it’s gonna be really poetic.”

“Uh… should I be scared?”

“No. Maybe a little. No.”

“… Okay.”

He looked at her.

“You are… wonderful.”

“Oh... Thanks?“

He looked away again, to be honest, he was a bit uncomfortable. He rarely received compliments, especially ones that seem so... genuine.

“I’m not finished, look back at me, just for a second. You are so wonderful- and I will support you as whatever you are! I want you to know that I can- I can barely even think of something you could do that would make me genuinely hate you- like… maybe if you Dahmer-ed people or like chopped up a-“

He found this was amusing, yet disturbing.

“Y/N?”

“Sorry- I just- the fact that you thought, even for a second, that I could hate you… is just-“

“I’m sorry”

“No! Stop it. Don’t be sorry.”

She stared at him expectantly.

“What do you want me to-“

“Take it back! The sorry!”

“How?”

“Say you aren’t sorry”

“N/N-“

“Peter.”

“Ok. I’m, ya know, not sorry.”

“Good. You shouldn’t be”

“You’re weird.”

“Yuh-huh. Says the most likely, from the little information I've gathered, bisexual in denial who also happens to be the fastest boy on earth who had to slow down exponentially to interact with other people who also, also, happens sitting on a roof in the dead of winter with me.”

“What’s by smexual?”

Something about the way he attempted to repeat her words must have been hilarious, he thought, because here she was, sitting in front of him, in a fit of childish giggles. He would smile if he weren't so confused.

“No- that’s not- what I said- it’s… wait!”

“What?”

“You’re tryna get me off topic!”

“Am not!”

“Are too!”

“Am not!”

“Am not!”

“Are t- shit.”

“HAHA! Victory is a sweet dessert... wait is that even the saying? Still, I win you lose, nerd.”

“Ok, okay! go on.”

She was attempting to gather herself to give off a less jokey aura. It was half working, the "am not! are too!" argument a few moments ago made it hard for him to take her seriously, but he could tell it was important to her that he did, so he tried his best.

“You have to look at me again. just for a second.”

“I sw-”

“Just do it? Please?”

His attempt to put up a fight was thwarted by her small "please". He was pathetic.

“Okay.”

He looked at her.

“You…”

“Me… or- wait- I…”

“Are w-“

“Wonderful, yeah yeah. just get to the n-”

“No.”

“… No?”

“When you say it it doesn’t encapsulate it. It sounds silly.”

“Ok little miss ‘you art thou wonderful’, how would you have me say it?”

“I am you wonderful?”

“What?”

“You called me ‘little miss you are you wonderful’ what does that-“

“Ok! Would you just- shut up and call me wonderful one more time, please?”

She looked at him and blinked. That sentence surely came off as less ironic than intended.

“You are wonderful.”

She grabbed his face, in a half-joking manner. Her grab smushed his cheeks and she couldn't help but laugh a bit when she did it. Even though it was clearly a bit, he was still flustered.

“W-“

She shook him a bit.

"Shut up 'cause I'm about to say some beautiful and true shit. You are wonderful. You are wonderful. You are wonderful. You are absolutely, unchangingly, and irrevocably wonderful and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it, Maximoff.”

After saying what she would (in 40 years or so) recall as a painfully John Green-ish statement in her blunt and matter-of-fact manner, she let go of her semi-ironic hold on his pink cheeks. Were his cheeks pink because it was absolutely freezing, or because his heart was beating faster than he had ever (and would ever, mind you) run, you ask? No comment.

“Wow.”

“Wow what.”

“You do say it better than I do.”

“Did you like how I stressed different parts of the sentence each time? I thought that was a nice detail.”

“Wow.”

“So I’ve heard.”

“Wow.”

Did his voice just... break a little?

“Peter?”

“Uh- yeah?”

Was he a little... sniffle-y? She was now very concerned.

“Are you okay?!”

“Oh- um... yeah!”

No! No he was clearly not! He was sniffling!

“Really? 'Cause, you don't seem it.”

“It’s just- I just- wow.”

“Wow, what!?”

“That was just- uh-"

“Just what? It really wasn't that fancy, you seem much too impressed with me. Oh my God, was it terrible?”

“I mean it was really corny but w-“

“I swear to God if you say 'wow' one more time I may have to add ‘use of the word wow too much’ to the list of things that could make me hate you. Right next to the Dahmer stuff. That was a joke. Your use of the word wow is only mildly perturbing. Sorry."

She was panicking "just a bit".

“I’m sorry, I mean I’m not sorry. Sorry. Shit! sorry! I mean I’m not!”

And he was absolutely... full-on crying at this point.

“Peter.”

“Yeah?”

He was looking down at his mittens. Not that this is important, but they were very pretty mittens.

“Look at me, you klepto.”

He didn’t.

“You know- I’ve been hearing a lot of that 'look at me' stuff from you today. I mean- the klepto part is new-“

“Peter.”

“What?!”

He peaked up at her.

“Talk to me. Please, you're kinda scaring me, let me help.”

“I’m not sad!”

“You’re crying!”

“Yeah but not from the sads!”

“… The ‘sads’?”

“You know- when you get sad! It just means being sad! I don't- that’s what Wanda calls it, not me!"

He wiped his nose, tears still running down from his puffy eyes to his reddened cheeks.

“What are you crying from?”

“No one’s ever called me wonderful before.”

“I'm sorry! I did a few minutes ago and you didn’t cry!”

“No! You can't 'sorry' me if I can't 'sorry' you! And- yeah but that doesn’t count!”

“Why?”

“Because it only felt big when you said it the certain way!”

“What way!?”

“You look at me, you grab my cheeks-“

“I'm sorry about that by the way I was j-“

“No! It’s really ok! Do it whenever! I mean don’t do it whene- shut up!”

“I’m not even talking! You're the one talking!”

“You look at me, you grab my cheeks, and you go: you are wonderful.”

“Yeah???”

“No one ever called me that before!”

"Peter, I- well- they- they should! They should! More often! Then the amount that it happens now! I think. In my opinion."

"Or really looked at me like that!”

“Looked at you like what, Peter?”

“Like I was somethin’!”

“Well, you are… ‘somethin'! Whatever that means! And- I think you deserve to be looked at as such!”

“See?”

“What!?”

“You just-“

A strangled sob escaped from his throat. He didn't know how to explain.

“Pete.”

“Ew. I hate that nickname.”

He crossed his arms over his chest like a toddler, trying to completely ignore the fact that he was an emotional wreck.

“Peter.”

“Yeah?”

She opened her arms and gestured for him to come closer. He was hesitant at first- but gave up all the reasons he shouldn't move to be closer to her in exchange for the promise of comfort she was offering him. He crawled over to her and curled up in her arms. The way she held him made him want to cry more. Who does she think she is- holding him like he was worth holding? With her chin sitting on top of his hair? Letting him do that gross cry sob with the spit and the snot into her only winter coat? Rocking him, and shushing him, and petting his stupid, silver hair? She was warm, too! The audacity of this woman.

When Erik brought Charles into his office to grab a chess set, they saw the two in the window. For a moment Charles considered telling Peter and Y/N to get off of the high platform, seeing as the two were the reasons the "no sitting on the roof" rule was enacted in the first place (neither of them were coordinated whatsoever). Charles quickly dropped this notion when he saw the look on Erik's face, Charles could tell it made him so happy to see Peter be held like that, cared for like that. Erik's expression made Charles want to both tell Erik that he is the most precious thing in the world, and make fun of him (look at Mr. Metal, gone completely soft). Possibly he could do both at the same time. But for now, he is just going to pretend he didn't see the two outside of the window, and have Erik grab them their game, go to the living room, and pretend not to have read Erik's mind when he inevitably asks him how he always manages to pick the white chess piece at "random".

[dramaqueeenamby]

A Day with the Udakus'

A/N: I know we’re all hurting, but I just wanted to maybe try to lighten the mood. I don’t really expect most of you to read this, or anyone, but for me, writing was therapeutic. I love you all, and we will get through this. 

Words: 3K

Warnings: NO ANGST. Just shenanigans

Summary: Reader is granted an exclusive interview with the Udaku family, but Y/N quickly realizes there’s more to the Wakandans than she could have ever realized. 

You clicked the pen three times. 

Once to ensure that it was unsheathed, another to close it again, and the last time for purposeful use. It was a habit you’d developed way back in middle school. You were always the irksome “pen clicker” who elevated everyone’s anxiety while taking an exam. However, for you, it was calming.

And to a certain extent, it still was.

You turned your head to the window only to remember that the coverings were unmovable, an intentional move, you were sure, to keep you from seeing too much.

You didn’t take it personal, though. You were just thankful to have this assignment, an assignment that could make or break your career depending on the outcome.

No one, in the history of your country, had been welcomed to Wakanda. The borders were solid as cement. No outsiders.

Yet, here you were, and to spend a day interviewing the royal family.

You began your pen clicking process all over again.

You meant to document how long the flight was, but nerves ate at your ability to keep time. If you had to guess, though, at least twelve hours transpired prior to your arrival.

And what an arrival it was. As soon as you stepped off the plane, you were immediately in awe. Flying machines similar to cars but much smaller than 747’s flew over, the monolithic buildings seemed to eclipse the clouds themselves, and the design of everything, the specific details, it all seemed too ethereal to be real.

But it was.

This was Wakanda.

You frowned.

Where in the hell did everyone get the notion that this country was among the poorest in Africa? From what she could see, it was easily the richest in the continent.

If not the world.

“You’re here!”

You directed your attention to a beaming girl who made a beeline in your direction. She looked no older than 18 and wore her hair in small box braids. Her attire was unlike any you’d seen. You made a mental note of that, as well as the exterior of the nation.

“Welcome….” You supplied your name, allowing her to include it in her greeting before she started bobbing on the back of her heels. “I’m so excited to meet you. I’ve never actually done a real interview before.”

You smiled and pushed a passion twist behind your ear. During one of your naps on the plane, your bun must have loosened. “It’s an honor to be here…..”

Her eyes widened. “Shuri. You can call me Shuri.”

Your eyes too widened. Shuri? “As in Princess Shuri?”

The teenager scowled. “Please, Shuri will do fine.” She moved closer and placed a hand on your shoulder. “Come. I will show you to your room.”

All you could do was awkwardly nod. This was the freaking princess of this majestic place, and she was enthusiastic as a kid at Disney. For you.

Your own parents weren’t even that excited when you told them you’d landed your dream job.

As Shuri walked you from the hangar bay to the inside of the palace, you took note of everything around you, the people you passed. The strong women who wore red, the men who wore shades of blue, black, and gray. They all exuded strength and power. Shuri explained the women were called the Dora Milaje, Wakanda’s all-female sect of the military. However, their first and foremost priority? Protecting the king and royal family.

The uniforms, the staffs, the power. Hell, you were damn near about to start spazzing.  

“Ahh, Erik!” Shuri stopped and gestured to a couple walking in your direction. “Come meet-”

“Goddamnit, woman, I told you I wasn’t looking at her!”

“Don’t call me a woman!”

“You a female, ain’t you? You got a pussy, don’t you?”

“You make me sick!”

“Naw, I make you gag, remember?” The man with short locs cursed as the woman he was arguing with grabbed at his hair, giving a good yank. “The fuck!”

“I want you to admit you were looking at her!”

“She was our waitress! Of course, I was looking at her! You asked me to order, damnit!”

“Nigga, don’t play with me, you know what I mean!” The woman paused. “You think she’s prettier than me, don’t you?”

“I don’t even know the bitch!”

“Don’t use that word around me!”

“Fuck this. You are really crazy, you know that?”

She suddenly started to whimper as the man’s shoulders dropped.

“You don’t love me anymore.”

As the woman began to sob, loudly and theatrically, he placed his arms around her and pulled her into his chest.

All you could do was stare in awe at the scene before you.

Shuri must have noticed your surprise. She waved her hand. “That is my cousin, Erik, and his wife--”

“Wife?” You interrupted, looking back and forth between the teen and the couple. “They’re married?”

Shuri nodded happily. “They’ve been together since primary.”

And they fight like that?

You also made a mental note to discuss the interesting dynamic of marriages in Wakanda in your writeup.

“You said it wasn’t big!” Erik’s wife was still crying and now punching on his chest as she angrily jabbed her finger in his shoulder. “You—you liar!”

Before Shuri could introduce you, the upset woman sauntered past and between you two, knocking you to the side.

“It isn’t, baby! You just got a lot on your mind!” Erik called after her, hands up in defeat. “A lot of thoughts!” He sighed and jogged toward you two, grabbing Shuri by the back of her neck and kissing her forehead. “I’ll catch you later, cuz.” He then looked your way, and you prayed he could not see the nervous swallow that coursed down your throat. He was so tall and handsome.

And married.

“Stranger.”

You opened your mouth, but he was already gone.

You sighed. It was better than being ignored.

Shuri shook her head and motioned for you two to continue walking. “We’ll try again at dinner. Come, let me finish showing you around.”

All you could do was quietly agree as she pointed things out, things you probably should have paid more attention to, but you were stuck not only on the volatile argument but just the wonders that surrounded you.

You expected poverty, dire conditions, solemn conversations. You were experiencing the complete opposite.

“Now this is—”

“Die, traitor! Die!”

“Wakanda Forever!”

“Surrender!”

“Never!

Multiple voices filled your ears as you turned the corner of a hallway, only to be knocked flat on your ass seconds later, your purse emptying, the recently purchased bottle of hand sanitizer rolling away from your body.

“Asha!” Shuri shouted with her arms crossed. “You come back here and apologize!”

The little girl with white locs that cascaded down her back, turned her head to look back. You caught her bright blue eyes and gasped. You’d never seen such a beautiful contrast of color. Her milky chocolate complexion, those ocean eyes, the icy white hair. She was easily the most beautiful little girl you’d ever seen.

“I cannot, Aunt Shuri! I must escape!”

“Asha...” Shuri’s voice transitioned into one of unequivocal sternness as she helped you stand up. “Now.��

Asha groaned and stomped over, pouting, she muttered a quiet sorry.

“You know better—”

“Now, Azari and N’Yami are going to win without me.”

“Another game of capture, eh?” Shuri chuckled and pulled the child into her, kissing the top of her head. “Y/N, this is my niece, Princess Asha.”

This time, you were able to watch your facial expressions. The only thing you did was curtsy. “Your highness.”

When you looked up, you saw Asha and Shuri sharing confused expressions. You faltered with your next statement, only for Asha to interrupt.

“What are you doing?”

“We don’t do that here,” Shuri explained with a small smile.

You were thankful for your deep complexion. Had you been caucasian, your embarrassment would have given you away.

You awkwardly looked down. “I’m sorry.” 

“You’re weird.”

“Asha!”

Shuri pinched her arm. The little princess scowled and grabbed the assaulted area. “Sorry.”

“Come, little one! We are off for another round.”

A new voice announced as three heads turned to the end of the hall where a group of kids stood amongst a giant. Wide, tall, and with muscles wrapping around bands of muscles, you swallowed again. You didn’t have to be close to see how attractive this man was.

Was every man in Wakanda sinfully handsome?

“Coming, Uncle M’Baku!” She looked up. “May I go now, Aunt Shuri?”

Shuri playfully sighed and motioned toward the other kids. “Go on.”

Without another word, she sprinted off, joining her friends before the group disappeared.

“Everyone is so busy today,” Shuri spoke with disappointment and crossed arms. “I planned to introduce you to the rest of the kids.”

You couldn’t help your interruption. “How many kids does the king have?”

“Four. Asha, N’Yami, and Azari, and Azzuri. Asha is the oldest. The other three are triplets.”

“My God,” you mumbled, then remembering that there were certainly more than three kids at the end of the hall. “And the others?”

“M’Baku’s kids. He was the tall man with them. He’s the leader of the Jabari tribe here. He and his wife Hawla have twelve children.”

Every segment of that sentence sent your eyebrows up in surprise. Yet, you retained more questions, especially after Shuri further explained how the tribes worked. She also mentioned introducing you to the leaders of this Jabari tribe.

It was a lot considering you hadn’t even been there for a whole hour.

“Come on, brother and sister should be in the training room.”

It wasn’t hard to figure that by brother, she meant King T’Challa, and by sister, Queen Ororo.

Where was that damn pen when you needed it?

“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to disturb them.”

“Nonsense, they’re probably just training.”

“Training?”

“You’ll see.”

Shuri’s coyness didn’t help your nerves. While she seemed to enjoy the madness of the palace, it spiked your discomfort. You’d mentally prepared for almost everything except the madhouse that you were being introduced to.

“Do not let brother intimidate you. His bark is much worse than his bite.”

You found that very hard to believe. King T’Challa, also the Black Panther, had single handedly defeated every member of the Avengers on their own turf, yet you were supposed to believe that he was amenable?

“Really?”

Shuri snorted. “No, he’s an ass.” You gulped. “Sister has helped calm him down, though, that much, I can’t deny.”

You said nothing else as she brought you to double doors that opened without her moving. That’d happened more than a couple of times, yet you could never detect any sign of motion sensors. Another note was made.

You walked into a room where a wall of windows exposed a large area that resembled a training type arena.

“There they—”

“My wife controls the weather itself, while I am just a man.” You weren’t even paying attention to the words coming out of his mouth. All you could focus on was him. He was in the suit, muscles stretching against the fabric. He walked while he spoke, his gait that of a predator, a hunter, a king. “A man who has studied every fighting style in the world.”

Across the room, she rose into the sky, floating high above the ground. The winds whipped around her, her arms raised. Her eyes were completely white, her matching white hair floating from the mass of winds.

Storm

“If I have learned anything, it is that every punch can be blocked.” Seconds later, the queen flew toward him, aiming for a punch, but falling short as he easily moved to the side. “Every weapon can be countered.”

You saw his lips move, but whatever was said was not audible.

His next statement, however, was not.

“Right this moment, above our head, an unmanned drone sprays the cloud with a super-absorbent powdered polymer.” As he spoke, large bolts of lightning were directed toward him. Some hit his suit, but he dodged most of them. “Out on the Indian Ocean, a swarm of nanotech phytoplankton eat the heat from a burgeoning storm.” You noticed how the winds started to lessen in intensity and depth. “Microwaves shoot down from Wakandan satellites, reducing an onrushing snowstorm to a slightly cooling breeze.”

Storm’s brows furrowed as she looked at her hands. The white hues of her eyes were returning to normal, revealing the same blue eyes you’d seen in Asha.

“The winds? What just—”

“I’m sorry, my love,” King T’Challa interrupted. She looked over at him, lowering to the ground. “I just blocked your punch.”

“You….” Her jaw drop and speech faltered. “All this time, you’ve had a plan for how to defeat your own wife.”

The king spoke in a bored voice. “Please remember, my dear,  I did not start this fight.”

“Neither will you finish it, my dear!”

Before he could reply, Storm struck him, sending him flying and landing on his ass. What started as a battle of abilities was now reduced to hand to hand combat. You watched in awe as these two incomparably powerful human beings battled each other. The fact that they were husband and wife, king and queen, mattered not even in the slightest. 

They looked like two gladiators dueling to the death.

“Do—do they do this often?”

“Train?” Shuri looked at you. “All the time.”

You almost fainted. “This is how they train?”

“You bastard!” The strength of the thunder that emanated from Storm caused the entire building to shake while the lightning causes the lights to flicker.

Shuri sighed and shook her head. “I suppose you’ll have to meet them at dinner.”

“Dinner?” You coughed. “I couldn’t—I don’t want to impose.”

“Nonsense. We’d love to have you.” Shuri’s smile widened. “Then you can meet the whole family at once.”

You suddenly wondered how hard it was to get a flight out of Wakanda.

xXx

The room you’d been given, so beautiful and magnanimous, was now a disaster. Clothes were thrown about while shoes clustered the floor. Underneath your makeup, your face was red and patchy from the two looks you tried, hated, and scrubbed before settling on a simple smoky eye and blood red lip.

Every outfit you tried on seemed either too fancy or too casual. Then again, you’d never had dinner with a royal family, let alone a family of heroes.  

You so badly wanted to find a way out of it, but Shuri, the seemingly only normal member of this family was hellbent on introducing you. You also had to factor in that you’d have to communicate with them at some point. You were there to interview them for god’s sake.

Two guards knocked on your door to escort you to the dining hall. You were a bit saddened at the fact that Shuri hadn’t come to bring you. You felt comfortable with her.

Imagine that. I need a teenager to walk me. What is this place doing to me?

As you walked down the hall, you sent up a quick prayer. The voices that were initially faint grew into loud and lucid. The double doors opened and revealed you to the room full of royals. You stood still as a statue.

“Y/N!” Shuri jumped from the table and jogged over. This dining room envied that of one on a college campus. “Welcome.” She smiled while standing in front of you. “You look wonderful.”

“Thank you.” You wanted to compliment her, but you could only focus on the pairs of eyes on you. Almost everyone was staring, but that wasn’t even what stood out the most. It was how they were looking.

Welcoming

“Y/N.” The queen was the first to speak, her smile wide and warm. You’d never seen such a beautiful person. Her white dress had a long split up the right side of her leg and the neckline dipped low, revealing her full breast. It was almost strange to think this was the same woman who viciously attacked her husband just a few hours ago. “It is a pleasure to have you here. We welcome you.”

“T-t-t-thank you, your highness.”

“Man, if you don’t call her RoRo,” Erik interjected. His wife, who stood next to him, slapped his arm.

“Ignore him. I’m Nareema.”

“My woman.” Erik’s hand sunk down to her ass, where he gave a soft slap.

“We welcome you to our home.” The tallest man stood, but not before helping the woman who sat next to him up. She rubbed her round stomach. “I am M’Baku, and this is my wife, Hawla.”

Ororo’s beauty was undeniable, but so were Hawla and Nareema. And the men…..

I wonder if everyone in Wakanda is as—

“Y/N.”

When he spoke, heads turned and ears tuned. He just commanded authority. Hands together and behind his back, he stared directly at you. His gaze nor tone of voice was as friendly as his wife, but you didn’t expect him to be welcoming you with open arms. You could only imagine what it took to even allow him to be willing to have you in his home. Around his family.

“I hope you are finding your visit well.”

“I-I am.” She quickly answered and then added, “your highness.”

“Oh please, don’t call him that,” Shuri corrected. “Brother’s ego is already big enough.”

“That is true,” Ororo chimed with a sly smile, looking at him out the corner of her eye. King T’Challa moved his hand to his wife’s and gave a soft squeeze and wink.

You retained a smile as they welcomed you to the table. When you asked about the kids, a chorus of groans erupted.

“They eat by themselves. We need our time away from those demons.”

“My children are warriors.”

“Your kids are bad as hell.”

“Erik!”

“I don’t know you talking, sis. Your kids even badder.”

“Mind your tongue, N’Jadaka.”

“Spark Jr. Sparky the Third, Sparky Spark, and Sparkle are all savages. I said what I said.” You brought the napkin to your mouth to hide your amused smile. “How the hell all four of they asses end up inheriting both ya’ll’s powers anyway? What kind of fucking ya’ll be doing?”

“Erik, must you be so vulgar?” Hawla complained.

“Aye, the little man speaks truth. How rare it is for all four to inherit such power.”

“Who the hell you calling little man, Mark Henry? This little man will beat the ruff ruff’s right out ya atomic dog ass.”

“N’Jadaka, please!”

“I told you he needed a muzzle.”

“That’s funny, cause I told cuz not to marry you.”

“Speak that way to my wife, again, N’Jadaka, and we shall see how well you can speak with your larynx severed.”

The calm delivery of King T’Challa’s threat sent chills down your spine, but they didn’t last.

“You wasn’t saying that when you was chillin at my crib last week talking about you were sick of her mood swings.”

If looks could kill, Erik and T’Challa would be on life support.

“You said what?”

“What was Ororo doing at our house? Where was I? Why did you not tell me this?”

“We will discuss this later.”

“No, we will discuss it now.”

“I do not answer to you, Ororo.”

“Oh, really?” She tilted her head to the side, staring at him, T’Challa kept their stare for a few more seconds when he grabbed at his throat. His fist banged on the table, causing the dishes to tremble from the intensity. You gasped. She was choking him.

“Here we go again,” Shuri mumbled, stabbing her fork into the plate. You looked around, Erik and Nareema were still arguing. She looked ready to cry. M’Baku and Hawla spoke quietly amongst themselves. You were flabbergasted. No one seemed the least bit concerned that the queen was trying to kill the king.

Again

“Damnit, Ororo!” King T’Challa finally spoke after quick, hearty coughs. “Damn you!”

“Would you like to tell me again you don’t answer to me?”

“This is what I am referring to. You are always so quick to anger!”

“Perhaps if my husband would not do things to make me angry, I would not be angry. Did that ever cross your miserable, self-centered brain?”

“You do hate me! I knew it!”

“Nareema, I don’t hate you!”

“Could we get another round of bread, please?”

“So, what is your family like?” Shuri suddenly asked in a bored tone. All you could do was look around. So much arguing, so many strange interactions, yet you were the only one who seemed bothered. And perhaps that was for a reason.

A good reason.

This was their norm, and despite how dysfunctional it appeared on the outside, it worked for them. And that was more than enough for you.

You’d just have to accept that this was just another day with the Udakus.’

[blackmissfrizzle]

City Boy and His Country Girl- Part 2

Read Part 1

Characters: Erik Stevens x black!reader

Summary: Erik takes the reader to the shooting range and learns some interesting things.

Warnings: Language, a dash a violence, Fuckboi!Erik but mostly softboi!Erik, and mentions of smut

A/N: I’m loving this series, so I hope y’all enjoy!

Hanging out with Erik was a total shock. Back home you were used to people talking shit by dressing it up and making it seem like a compliment, but Erik, but Erik Stevens didn’t have no trouble speaking his mind.

If he didn’t like an idea you had for work it wasn’t a ‘Oh, it could be better.’ It was a ‘Texas, that shit fucking sucks. If you wanna beat them colonizers you need something better. Wake me up when you have something better.’

He had no filter on some of your outfits. “Y/N/N stop dressing like you about to go to the hoe down! This is New York City, dress like it!”

Sometimes you wanted to gouge his eyes out, but then you remembered whenever one of your coworkers insulted you, you didn’t break down and cry in the restroom, because Erik was already thickening your skin. You even found yourself snapping back at your coworkers when they tried you.

Then the self-defense training was a whole another beast! Erik was ruthless.  He trained you like you were gonna join the ghost operation, he was a part of in the Navy. It didn’t matter if you just threw up, your ass better be ready, his words, not yours.

Also, it was pure torture, but not because of the physical pain. It was because somehow someway Erik always ended up naked. His raised scars were a little jarring at first, but once you got used to them, it added to his appeal.

Erik was an Adonis, a Greek statute in the living flesh. Half of the time you got knocked on your ass because you were too busy gawking at his body. Sometimes it felt like he knew you were staring because he would just smirk at you.

And then those damn gym shorts he’d be wearing, do nothing to hide his dick print. And what you could tell from it was that it was nothing to play with.

Today he was teaching you a new lesson: how to shoot. Little did he know that you had expert marksmanship. Daddy-daughter bonding with your dad was spent hunting, fishing, and shooting. Erik Stevens was in for a surprise.

“Texas, you need to keep your legs shoulder width apart and keep your feet planted,” Erik instructed, sticking his leg in between yours, forcing you into the stance.

Having him this dangerously close to you made you tremble. His scent was intoxicating and having his hard body pressed against you made you want to lean back into him and stay there.

“Damn girl! You shaking like a damn leaf, you scared or something?” Erik joked, knowing him pressing himself against you had you shaking like that. Every time he trained you, he noticed the lust in your eyes. That’s why he always took off his shirt and wore his grey sweats. One time he caught you looking at his print when you thought he wasn’t paying attention and he made his dick jump to mess with you. The little gasp you made in reaction almost had you flat on the mat while Erik had your ankles up to your ears and deep in that puss.

“No,” you said, snatching the gun off the counter. “Can we start now,” you asked, annoyed at how easily Erik affected you.

Erik raised his hands in surrender. “Damn, my bad. Remember if you miss more than five, you gotta cook me some of your bomb ass fried chicken.” Erik reminded you of the bet before pressing the button.

The targets popped up instantly and for the first time in a while you felt like you were home. Effortlessly, you hit each bullseye, leaving you wanting for more.

Facing Erik, he was standing there slacked jaw. This was the first time you had him at a loss for words and you were gonna enjoy it. “Huh, you quiet now, Oakland,” you cuffed your hand around your ear. Teasing him some more you began crunk dancing in his space. “I can’t hear you, Stevens!”

Erik was doing his best not to laugh at your silliness. He still wanted to pretend that he was mad at you, but it was proving to be harder by the minute. “Girl calm your silly ass down! You had me go through all that, just for you to breeze through like you were the one in the military. What about my fried chicken? You know a nigga hungry!”

“Boy, stop being a cry baby,” you smacked your lips. “That’s what you get for assuming shit and I wasn’t gonna leave you hanging. I know them hoes ain’t feeding your greedy ass.”

Digging for his keys in his pocket, Erik grabbed your hand and rushed the two of you out the building. “Shit lets go then! A nigga hungry!”

“Ole greedy ass,” you mumbled, letting Erik shove you into his loud ass yellow, McLaren 570s.

--

Erik was tearing into his plate. The only time he got a home cooked meal was with Y/N or with his aunt and cousins, which was traditional Wakandan food. So when he got some soul food he had to savor it.

“So, Texas, tell me why you so good at shooting?” Erik asked you, when he finally stopped eating to drink some sweet tea.

“My daddy used to take me out back all the time and we practiced shooting. You should see me with a shotgun.”

“Makes sense,” Erik nodded his head, thinking on how you were raised in the south. “Y/N, lemme ask you something. Its been on my mind for a while.”

Dropping your fork of mashed potatoes, you responded with worry at the seriousness of Erik’s tone, “What is it, Erik?”

“You call anyone else daddy besides your dad?”

It took awhile to catch his drift, but when you did you threw a roll at his face, which he caught with his mouth. “Ewww, no! What the hell is wrong withch yo nasty ass?”

Erik busted out laughing, causing the roll to fall out of his mouth. He had inkling that you never did before, but he loved messing with you. “Awww, c’mon on ma, you ain’t have a nigga give you some dick that you couldn’t call him nothing but daddy?” He asked, licking his lips and tilting his head looking at you curiously.

You couldn’t handle the warm feeling Erik was causing to your little bundle of nerves, so a quick diversion was needed. Resorting to your old childish antics, you stuck a finger in each of your ears and yelled, “La la la la la la la la la la.”

Taking hold of each of your wrists, Erik pulled your fingers out of your ears. “Girl grow up! Why you always shying away from talking about sex?”

“Because it’s unlady like and you not my man, Mr. Stevens.” Talking sex was a regular with your friends on girl’s night and it could get graphic, but something told you talking about sex with Erik was whole another thing.

Off rip, Erik sensed you were an undercover freak, you just needed the right person to bring it out. “Man, I don’t need to be your man to give you that good daddy dick,” Erik said, smiling, clasping his hands behind his head so you could admire his biceps.

Rolling your eyes, you got up from your seat and grabbed both of y’all plates and went to the sink. “My mama warned me about men like you, Erik Stevens.”

Getting up from his seat, Erik crept behind you, caging you in between him and the sink. “Princess, I promise there ain’t no men like me,” Erik whispered.

“Shit, Erik! Stop scaring me like that!” You yelled at him, trying your best to calm your nerves.

“My bad, ma.” Erik apologized while he took the dirty plate out your hand and bumped you with his hip to move you out of the way so he could finish the dishes.

Taking this blessing you jumped on the counter besides Erik to keep him company. At this angle you had the perfect view of his profile. Erik had the most beautiful skin, smooth and rich. He was probably one of those lucky niggas who only used soap and water on his face while you had to use fifty-eleven million products just not to get one pimple.

Right now, studying him you didn’t realize how attracted you were to his jaw. Your favorite thing was when he was deep in concentration like now or when he was annoyed, his jaw would clench, and you swore you do anything for that man.

Feeling you stare at him, but wanting to lay off on the teasing, Erik asked you a question. “So, what type of men like me did Mrs. Y/L/N warn you about?”

“Silver tongued devils that make women lose all common sense.”

Flicking his tongue suggestively, Erik answered, “I gotta admit this tongue is talented.”

Smacking him on the back of his neck, you mumbled, “Nasty ass.”

“All you gotta do is ask, ma. You don’t have to revert to elementary days to show that you like me,” Erik joked, rubbing the back of his neck with a sudsy hand.

Ignoring his comment, you changed the subject before you do something stupid and ask him to show you how talented his tongue is. “Enough talking about me. How’s the work project going?”

“Oh, it’s dope, Texas! I feel like a slacker with the kids coming up with all the ideas. All I’m doing is the actual production of the filtration system.” Erik face lit up as he went on to explain how the kids at the Outreach Center were coming up with ideas for a water filter for Flint.

The way Erik got hyped about the kids he was helping, told you he’d be an excellent father. Before your brain could dream up what you and his nonexistent children would look like his phone pinged.

Since he was busy washing dishes, Erik asked you to get it. “Oooooo, it’s a text from Ashley.”

“Which one,” he asked absentmindedly.

Rolling your eyes, you forgot that Erik had a roster of girls. “She’s got a diamond emoji next to her name.”

“Ohhh, Anal Ashley. What she want?”

Shaking your head at his fuckboy tendencies you read the text in a ditzy but sultry tone. “Daddy, I need you.”

At the sound of your voice saying daddy, Erik almost broke the glass he was washing. He would have to remember that for a later date. “See, you can call a nigga daddy. And tell her I’m busy.”

“No, I can’t. I was just getting into character. And nigga, no you not!”

Erik finished washing the last dish and then dried his hands with a towel. “I’m hanging out with my bestie. Ain’t that doing something?”

Even though you didn’t want him to go, you needed him to go. Or those feelings you were ignoring were gonna grow deeper. “You can hangout with me anytime. Go see one of your hoes. You know you get cranky when you haven’t had sex in awhile.”

There was no way Erik wanted trade time with you with some random girl for meaningless sex and meaningless conversation. But he also had a painful erection since he heard you read that text and he didn’t want to push up on you that hard.  A poor substitution would have to do. “You sure?”

“Yeah, I’m about to watch Real Housewives of Atlanta guilt free without you judging me.” Whenever you put it on, Erik would grumble and complain about you watching trash tv.

Grabbing his keys, Erik walked to the door and you followed. “A’ight, imma head out. Lock this door as soon as I head out.” Erik commanded you, knowing you had a tendency to forget to lock your door.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can you go now? Nene is calling my name.”

Before leaving, Erik kissed your cheek and bid you goodbye. Taking in that he kissed you, you floated to the couch, daydreaming about the man, forgetting to lock the door.

“Y/N, LOCK THIS DAMN DOOR!” Erik furious voice broke your daydream.

“Go away, Erik! Nobody’s gonna rob me while I’m here.” You yelled back, not moving an inch from your couch.

“I’m not leaving until you get your country bumpkin ass up and lock this door, deadass!”

Grumbling you got up and locked the door. “Happy now?!”

“Thank you! Imma hit you up when I’m done.” Erik told you.

Returning to your couch, you turned on your tv and tried not to think about how Erik was having sex with some one other than you.

—

“It happens to everyone, Daddy. Let’s watch some tv.” Ashley suggested, reaching for her remote with one hand and stroking his arm with another.

Erik couldn’t believe he couldn’t get it up. Especially with help from the henny.

Ashley was a beautiful girl, no doubt. A redbone version of Naomi Campbell with the attitude to match for no apparent reason, but that never stopped him before.

The thing was she wasn’t you. When Erik had his eyes closed, he could pretend it was you sucking him up, but once his eyes opened and he saw Ashley he instantly went soft.

“Nah, imma head out instead,” Erik said, lifting up from the couch.

Tugging his arm, Ashley pulled Erik back to his seat. “No, stay.”

“Listen, Ash, to be honest I don’t think this,” Erik motioned between him and Ashley. “is gonna work. I’m ending this tonight.”

Ashley’s mood changed.  “It’s because of that cow you’re always posting on your snap, huh?” She said, referring to you.

Lunging across the couch, Erik’s hands wrapped around Ashley’s throat. His hands choked her tight enough to let her know he meant business but not too tight to do any damage.

“Don’t you ever fucking disrespect her like that again!” He warned through gritted teeth.

“Now Killmonger wants to come out to play! Get your crazy ass out my house!”

Erik shoved her into the couch before he hopped up. “Lose my fucking number too! I don’t wanna hear from your ignorant ass anymore.”

“Nobody wants a limped ass dick nigga anyway! Good riddance!” Ashley shouted as Erik slammed the door.

While he was walking to his car, Erik texted the one person who he knew still be up.

MSG ERIK: Hey, I’m on my way over so get ready because we ain’t watching that RHOA shit. We watching The Godfather.

MSG Y/N: Already??? Damn Oakland, I didn’t know you were a minute man 😂 and who tf you think you are??? This my house and we’ll watch whatever I want PERIODT!

MSG ERIK: Girl, don’t play with me before I have to make an example of you 💪🏾 and like I said we watching The Godfather.

MSG Y/N: 🙄🙄🙄 whatever. I’ll leave the door unlocked.

MSG ERIK: Y/N KEEP THAT DOOR FUCKING LOCKED!

You read his message but didn’t reply. Erik hated being left on read. Happily, you skipped to unlock your door, knowing that was one more thing to piss off your bestie.

Sliding into his driver’s seat, Erik double checked his phone to see if he was reading it correctly. It said you read his last message, but you didn’t reply.

“This little girl really left me on read. Imma get her ass and that door better be locked when I get there,” Erik mumbled to himself while securing himself.

Soon as the car roared to life, Erik sped down the streets of New York rushing to get to the one woman who made him want to pull his hair out and cuddle her at the same time.

Tagging: @fd-writes @raysunshine78 @momobaby227 @thickemadame @twistedcharismaaa @marvelmaree @ladydragonpurplefire @l-auteuse @thehomierobbstark @titty-teetee @nerd-lovely @soufcakmistress @chaneajoyyy

[eerythingisshaka]

Check Up 2

[Doctor!Erik “Killmonger” Stevens x Reader]

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: Teledoc

You let a whole week pass.  Thinking about your ‘prescription’ is all you can do with your free time.  You kept that sheet of paper in your purse and took it out during your lunch break, at happy hour, and every night you sat on the couch alone at night.  And when you went to bed, you gave up on underwear because apparently wet dreams affect women too and you could not get him out of them.

You couldn’t talk to your friends about what happened.  As far as they knew, you chickened out before the appointment.  You really wish you did tell them though because now this prescription is burning a hole in your hand and you can’t figure out what to do with it.  

One night, you decide hanging with your girls is a good distraction and call them up to come over for a get together.  Sipping and snacking with a movie that none of you pay attention to was a great distraction.

“But chile, let me tell y’all about the last time I went to the doctor,”  your high school friend exclaims, setting down her glass.

Your college friend coughs into her chest.  “I told you that bump on your puss was nothing but an ingrown...but if I was wrong, I also told you to stop messing with the dude you met selling phones outside the grocery.”

She waves her off.  “I’ll never have to pay a phone bill again though.  However, you were right about the ingrown but I mean the pussy clinic.”

You perk up, leaning with intrigue.  “Yeah, how did that go?”

“Well, I made my appointment and everything, even requested him specifically to see me.  So after I got my wax and went over there, I got seen and put in a room for examination.  He comes in and BITCH!”

You feel your heart lurch in your throat.  Of course he sees other women with this.  But one of your friends?  Is there anything more disgusting?

She continues, “...so I’m sitting there like a deer in headlights looking at this brown, tall, muscular, educated with an attitude ass that I could never let slip from my grip if he needed it.”

Your college friend hoots and hollers.  “Baby GIRL!  So how did he do?  Did y’all fuck?  Oh my God that’s one of my favorite porn genres:  Doctors and Bosses fucking you all over the office!”  

High school friend shrugs, taking her glass up woefully.  “He is unfortunately long winded and VERY clinical in his explanations of the damn vagina.  I never thought I could be so bored of it, I almost wanted to sit on his face just to shut him the fuck up, which I did offer.”

“To sit on his face?!”  you exclaim loudly, checking yourself internally for your outburst but she doesn’t notice.

“I offered for him to see it.  I thought a gynecological exam came with it, which it does but he steps out and some white woman comes in and does the same bullshit I always get at my regular doctor.”

“Damn, so the streets were telling lies?”  College friend whispers, looking incredulous into the distance as her hopes crumbled in her mind.

“Unfortunately, I think so.  So (y/n) don’t even worry about missing that appointment, it’s literally a lecture with a pap smear at the end, which is worse than any lecture I sat through in college.  At least my TA was down for a make out every exam time.”

You chuckle absentmindedly, but not because of her academic indiscretions.  You had to know why he gave you the treatment differently.  And you have left him on a limb for over a week now when there is no greater sign than this that he may have clearly expressed interest.  You couldn’t be left stuck on stupid.

“Hey y’all, I’ll be right back.  My mama wants me to call her about some movie actors she wants me to look up.  She never gon learn Google.”

Your friends go right back to chatting with each other as you walk back to your room and shut the door.  It’s 6:30, would he even be available to talk?  You have no idea if this is a personal number or his work number, but if you had to leave a message, that would be better than nothing.  You are a patient, after all.

You sneak back to your bedroom, closing the door and laying out the prescription paper on your desk to make the call.  Your heartbeat was pounding strong in your chest as you became excited.  The back and forth pull of hoping he wouldn’t pick up while hoping to he would makes you feel foolishly juvenile, but your muted shriek as the phone rang confirmed how exhilarating this all is for you.

It rings once, twice, three times, then four.  You start to wonder if you should hang up or wait to leave a voicemail.  What would you even say?   How could he respond to-”

“Good evening, Dr. Erik Stevens speaking.”

Your heart couldn’t take the pressure, leaving your body it seems as you freeze in shock.

“Hello?  Is this (Y/N)?”

You plop back on the bed, beating a pillow beside you to work out you sudden burst of energy.  How the hell did he know it was you?

“Uh, yes.  It’s me, thanks for calling,” you reply professionally.

“...you called me,” he says with a warm laugh on his end.

You smack your forehead, “Oh yeah!  I did, you’re correct.  I meant to say thanks for answering.”

“What’s up?”  he asks coolly.

You puff out your cheeks, finding the words as smoothly as possible.  “Um, I had wanted you to fill me, erm, fill YOU in on my progress but really there isn’t much to go on.”

“Really?”  he says, sounding genuinely curious.  “What’s been happening?”

You shrug as if he can see it.  “I mean, who knows but I know I have been busy so I can’t dedicate a ton of time but also, when I have tried...you know…”

“Masturbation?”

You felt your pussy jump 3 feet that time.  The word sounds so 1970s PSA after school special to you but when he says it, it’s like your favorite thing on the menu being a happy hour item when you didn’t expect it.

“Heh, yes.  So when I tried like you did, I couldn’t feel the things I did in your office,”  you feel so meek and shy talking about this.  He is a doctor, it’s his job and he has seen it all but you shrink within yourself discussing this.

He gives a couple uh huhs and pauses before asking, “How did I make you feel during your visit?”

Your body tenses up again as you stammer some, getting worked up.

“Now be easy, that is the start of the issues right there.  Calm down and relax.  Take some deep breaths.”

His voice is like coffee: rich, energizing, needed to get from one activity to the next.  You do so clutching a pillow tightly in front of you.  “Ok.  when I was there honestly I was nervous.  I wasn’t sure what to expect but friends said I should see you just cuz you’re so fine.”

“Hm, I guess that’s a recommendation I won’t complain about.”

You both laugh together.

“It’s crazy but I wanted to see what the fuss was.  I should’ve known better, why would I go do this after so many women before me,”  you make sure to add that to get a gauge of his status of wooing anyone else like you.

“I don’t take on every patient that comes in, so you know,”  Erik says assuredly.

“I know…” you say trailing off with slight disappointment.

“Also...I gave you extra...care because it seemed to work best for you.  I have not done that with any other patients because they seem honestly more into the information I provide or ask for a female doctor or are very enthusiastic about examining themselves.”

You tried to find the right words to say just so that it doesn’t come off as too thirsty but real.  He wanted to know that he took care of you after all.  

“Well, I appreciate you being in tune with your patients like that.  I didn’t necessarily expect what happened but it felt good all the same.  I mean I really had some issues with seeing the good of my…”

“Vagina, though you probably mean vulva,” he says matter-of-factly.

You felt embarrassed again.  How you, a woman, couldn’t say it but from him it’s like reading a feminist poem.  “Vagina/vulva, exactly.  I always hear about so many standards guys have and that influences women to pass on even more standards on what it should look like, smell like, feel like, but none of it matches me to a T.  So you informed me and that made me not feel weird about opening myself up to you after knowing you for 5 minutes.  Plus, it’s your job of course, so I know I ‘m not the first.”

“You weren’t just a part of the job though.”

“Come again?  What?”  you ask, sitting up straight.

“I can’t lie when you were here, I was highly attracted to you.  You engaged me in conversation, which showed me how smart you are.  And you’re...beautiful, in every possible way.”

You practically eat your pillow at the revelation.  “I...that is...amazing you would say that.”

Erik chuckles.  “I mean that too.  And I apologize in advance if it’s forward but I hoped you would call when I gave you the prescription, I almost didn’t think it would happen.”

You fan yourself excitedly, “Can’t seem too eager.  But I could use a refresher on what I was taught.”

“Exactly what this hotline is for!  So let me think here.  You’re in a comfortable space, right?  Alone.”

This reminds you that your friends are in the other room.  “Sure, yeah.”

Erik’s voice drops a little lower as he discusses the topic at hand.  “Ok.  The best way I find that works for you is if I were to spread your legs wide.  It gives me a lot of space to work with.”

You feel yourself warm up at the image.  “Sure, that definitely works.”

“Yeah, cuz I can have you completely open in front of me, so there’s nothing and nowhere to hide.  Your body is served up right and ready for me to...demonstrate.  By now, I could tell already that you’re aroused.  Do you want to do this, while you’re on the phone with me?”

You run lightly over to your bedroom door to lock it, kicking off your shorts and underwear to fly back onto the bed.  “Ok, sure.  And you really could tell already?”

“Uh huh.  Cuz you can’t look straight at me at first and you holding on to the sides of the table to brace yourself.  But I promise I won’t do anything that would hurt, ok?  Then I take my hands and run them along your inner thighs.”

“Oh wow,” you say already breathless, as your fingers feel the softness of your inner thigh, tightening your stomach up from the sensation.

“Does that kinda tickle you?”  he asks gently.

You giggle.  “Yeah it does,”  you say, running one hand down your inner thigh back and forth light as a feather.

“That’s good.  It helps with anticipation, excitement.  Your laugh is cute too, and that makes me want to hear you do other things too, so I kiss the skin on your thigh cuz it’s soft and-”

You gask, jerking your legs together again and smile with all teeth, trying to hold in the goofy laugh that almost spurted from your mouth.  

Erik laughs.  “...and I make you gasp and laugh just like that.  Like I did something so innocent and childish when I’m only getting ready to bring the freak outta you with just my tongue.”

You exhale, feeling yourself become anxious as your body gets antsy.  You wish with all your heart he was in the room.

“Now I can see for real you wanting me.  That pussy starts to talk back to me a little and it makes me curious.  You remember how my fingers felt pulling your lips apart for the first time?”

“God, yes,” you moan, reliving the very moment.  You feel your lips, vulnerably tender to your touch, you take your fingers down between them and shudder, looking down as you part them, you catch a glimpse yourself in the full length mirror on your closet door.  

“And when I do that, it tells me everything.  I can tell your body is getting your shit ready for me, making your skin more sensitive for my touch, those walls getting warm and wet to make you want more and more, and I want to taste it.  The sweet drip that pools from within you, I gotta have it.  But only a taste.”

“You can taste it all,”  you whisper, reaching for your clit.

Erik laughs.  “Ok, thank you.  But don’t you dare touch that fucking clit yet.”

You sit up, putting your knees together feeling frustrated.  “What?  Why?”

“So before I get my taste, I have to taste with my eyes right?  Now I got to taste it with my touch.  So, let me place my hand on top of you, running my fingers through some curls of yours til I get to your lips, dragging my thumb up and down so you good and coated with all that drip.  Go ahead and do that for me.”

“Wow, yeah,” you hiss, turning over on your stomach, spreading your knees wide with a high arch, imagining him seeing you fully vested.

Erik sounds very close to the phone as he says, “I really really like the way your lips look under my fingers, it’s like they dance with my rhythm and it’s hard to stop.  But I had to know what your pussy was talking to me about from earlier, so I put my finger inside you, slowly, pushing in.  That’s when I feel you tighten up a little.”

You slide two fingers in and out of yourself as you bite the pillow.  “More.”

“More?  That’s what I thought too, since you tighten up for one finger, I easily put another in, feeling your walls put their work out on me.”

You dig your forehead into the mattress, not able to wait any longer, you move your soaked finger up to your clit, shuddering against your touch.

“I know, especially, when I work your clit with my fingers in you at the same time.  It’s like you forget to breathe, going quiet then gasping sharper, faster..”

You feel your arousal at its peak, breathing into your chest as your back curls up, pushing your hand deep into your sheets.  You sit into your hand further, not wanting to let go of your climax too soon.

“Ohh, shit, I think you found your nut, didn’t you?”

“Yes, yes!  Fuucck Erik,”  you repeat over and over with the rhythm of your hips as your orgasm grows, messing up your sheets and giving not a fuck about it.

“I did, but you know what I need now?  I got my eyeful, and my touch, but now I really really need to taste you,”  Erik says with a growl.

“Taste it,” you plead.

“I take my fingers out of you and they are soaked with you cuz you wanna give me your all.  I want you to look at me as I lick my hand clean of you.”

“I see it.  Taste some more.”

“Your hips are moving at me, getting closer like you need more.”

“I do!”  You say louder feeling a concentrated force work from your center toward the outer edges of our body.

“I love to see you need it.  You ain’t playing with me laughing and smiling, you’re begging and angst ridden.  Now I have to make you feel me, it’s what I have to do.  Just when my tongue touches down on your lips, your legs jerk around me, but I know that’s only a reflex so I dig my tongue into your deeper, whipping it up to your clit before wrapping my lips around it.  

“Shit!  Fuck!” you whisper feeling your clit get over stimulated, aftershocks leaving you jerky..

“Just like that, baby girl.  You hooked right into me.  Feeling your hands dig into me skin while you cum had me solid.  It took everything for me to not turn you over and show you the real shit.  Now I want you to come.”

You push yourself up slowly, your head feeling hazy.  You hadn’t came that hard since the last time, and you just had to get the full experience.

You roll over, feeling lifted.  “I have.”

“Nah, I need you to meet me.”  Erik demands. You spring up from your bed.  “Where?  When?  Like, huh?”

“Just come to my office.  We closed 30 minutes ago.  I’ll wait for you.”

You run to your shower to get a quick fresh up before putting on something cute but functional.  You figure something that will allow him to get all of you just like he said he wanted over the phone and no one is more naked than going to the bathroom in a romper,s o you chose this olive green, with skinny faux belt in the front and a love neckline.  Some platform sandals that match your skin tone and some curl refresh in your hair, and you’re good to go.  

As you walk out of your bedroom, seeing your friends there almost scare you.

“Uh, girl where are you going?  Is your mom alright?”  Your college friend asks while looking you up and down in your new outfit.

You put on your best acting performance.  “She is, but she lost the remote again and hit a button so I need to reprogram something.  I’ll be back, stay long as y’all want to.”

“AHEM!  You look rather nice for a pop over to your mama’s.  Is there something else going on?”  High school friend asks with a judgmental gaze.

You feign frustration, “Ugh, I know, it’s such a  hassle, but daughter’s gotta do what they gotta do.  I’ll be back in like...a while.”  You exit your apartment in a rush, dodging all follow up questions aimed at your back.

Masterlist

[tomhiddlestonfanfic]

A Step Too Far? Chapter Eight Your Cheatin’ Heart

Ch. 1 - Ch. 2 - Ch. 3 - Ch. 4 - Ch. 5 - Ch. 6 - Ch. 7 - Ch. 8 - Ch. 9

TITLE: A Step Too Far? NUMBER OF CHAPTERS/ONE SHOT: 8/? WHICH TOM CHARACTER: Stepfather Tom OTHER CHARACTERS: Benedict Cumberbatch, Andrew Scott PAIRING: Tom/OFC, Benedict Cumberbatch/OFC GENRE: Drama, Hurt/Comfort

CHAPTER EIGHT

Following day at the office, Nina kept sending Stina to do errands concerning Benedict. She decided that she should try to avoid him as much as possible to prevent any further sexual contact between them. She felt horrible for his sweet, soft-spoken wife and couldn’t get the image of her out of her head. She deserved better.

“Is something up between you and mister Cumberbatch?” Stina asked curiously as they had lunch together. They both had salads and sparkling water, and were dressed similarly with white shirts and black pencil skirts. While Nina was pretty slim built with big breasts, Stina had a very curvy, womanly figure that Nina couldn’t help but envy. While Nina wanted to be thin herself, she did find Stina’s curvy body type to be more attractive than her own. And to judge by the men’s appreciative looks towards Stina, they thought so as well.

“No. Or well...” Nina decided to lie about it, since there obviously was something going on between herself and Benedict. “Please, don’t tell anyone,” she said and leaned slightly forward over the table to speak in a lower voice than before, as though she was to confide Stina with something very private. “But he yelled at me the other day about a bill I forgot to pay. I know it was a big mistake and all, but he didn’t have to lose his temper like that. So I’m trying to avoid him as much as possible.”

“Oh, I see,” Stina replied with a sympathetic smile. “I’m sorry he yelled at you. I’ll help you avoid him if that’s how you want to handle the situation.”

“Thank you,” Nina said appreciatively.

“But I think it would be best if you just talked to him about it. It’s not good if you feel like you need to avoid him. I could come with you, if you like, for moral support,” Stina offered helpfully.

“Thanks, Stina,” Nina said. “Right now I just want to stay away from him for a bit, but I’ll let you know if I change my mind.”

“Okay,” Stina replied with a gentle smile.

Nina looked at her colleague and wondered how she could have disliked her so much before. It must have been the sense of rivalry between them. But Stina had not seemed to be that affected by the fact that Nina had the position she had wanted for herself. Instead, she had in fact been very nice and welcoming towards Nina. And helpful. She was always there to lend a helping hand if Nina should need one. She was very sweet and somehow reminded Nina of Jim. He was also incredibly helpful and understanding. Maybe they would make a good fit?

“Are you single?” Nina asked suddenly.

“Um, at the moment, yes. But I do have two cats,” Stina replied with a smile.

“Would you like to go on a date?” Nina asked.

“With you? Sure, why not,” Stina answered with a shrug. Nina cursed herself internally for not having been more clear that she wanted Stina to go on a date with her friend Jim. She couldn’t exactly tell her that now without turning it awkward.

“How about dinner and a movie?” Nina suggested. She decided that she had to go through with it, otherwise she would embarrass Stina and possibly ruin their new friendship.

“Sounds good to me,” Stina replied with a smile.

“Are you free on Thursday after work?” Nina asked, scrolling through her calendar on the phone. Stina picked up her phone as well and copied the action.

“Thursday’s great,” she replied cheerfully.

“Great,” Nina replied and smiled to herself. A date would be a good way to get to know Stina better, and after all, Nina was kind of interested in her.

The days went by, and Nina only had brief professional interactions with Benedict thanks to Stina’s help. Eventually, Thursday came and it was time for Nina and Stina’s date.

“Are you coming?” Tom asked, like he usually did when the working day was over.

“Actually, I’m going on a date,” Nina told him happily.

“Oh, I see. With whom, if I may ask?” Tom wondered curiously.

“With Stina,” Nina replied as she got up from her seat and grabbed the backpack with an extra change of clothes that she had brought to work that morning.

“Stina Johansson?” Tom asked and his eyes widened slightly with surprise as Nina nodded at him. “Oh, I didn’t know that you were- I mean. I hope you have fun. What are you going to do on your date?”

“Dinner first, and then a movie,” Nina replied gleefully, amused by his reaction to the fact that she was going on a date with another girl.

“Okay, I’ll see you tonight then,” he told her with a smile. “Have fun.”

“I will,” Nina said with a smile before heading to the changing room where she got changed into a turquoise dress. She stood by the mirror and reapplied her makeup as Stina walked in. They seemed to be the only ones left at the office.

“Hi,” Stina greeted her gleefully and proceeded to get changed into a wine red dress.

“Hi,” Nina replied and felt a fluttering sensation in her abdomen as she took in Stina’s beauty.

They got ready together and had a pleasant dinner at a restaurant near the movie theatre. Nina insisted on paying the tab at the restaurant and Stina insisted on paying for the movie tickets and snacks at the cinema. Nina smiled as she thought about how they both had wanted to pay and almost gotten into an argument about it. The movie was a romantic comedy, and none of them paid much attention to the storyline as they were busy making out with each other.

When the movie was finally over and the lights went on, the two women finally parted from each other, earning amused looks from the people who had been sitting closest to them. Nina blushed in embarrassment, whereas Stina just smiled brightly at them.

“So, I suppose this is it,” Nina said reluctantly as they stood outside the movie theatre. She wanted to spend more time in Stina’s company.

“You could always crash at my place,” Stina suggested and Nina felt a big smile spread across her face.

“Sure,” she agreed gleefully.

Stina was living in a small, but nice apartment together with her two cats; Tor and Loke from the norse mythology. Loke was black, small and very energetic, whereas Tor was cream coloured, big and quite calm. Nina had a great time playing with the cats and they seemed to appreciate being at the centre of attention for a little while. Once they grew tired of her, they simply laid down to take a nap.

“Oh, I wish I was a cat,” Nina said excitedly as she watched Tor and Loke sleep.

“Why?” Stina asked her amusedly and handed her another glass of wine.

“Then I could take naps all the time without anyone complaining,” Nina replied dreamingly.

“But you don’t want to sleep away most of your days, do you?” Stina asked as she sat down on the barstool in the kitchen.

“Sometimes I do. Like I’ve already told you, I get tired a lot,” Nina said a bit sadly and took another sip of wine.

“I’ve noticed that you drink a lot of energy drinks,” Stina replied. “Is there any medical reason you feel tired all the time? Have you told doctor Freeman about it?”

“He knows about it,” Nina told her. “I have ADD. It’s like ADHD but without hyperactivity.”

“Ah, I see. My brother has ADHD, so I know a little bit about it. Do you take medications for it?” Stina asked interestedly.

“Not at the moment, but I’m going to start again as soon as doctor Freeman says it’s alright for me to take them again,” Nina explained.

“Ah, I see. Did you lose too much weight taking them? My brother did that,” Stina said understandingly.

“Exactly,” Nina replied and made a slight grimace at the thought of her doctor’s reaction to her rapid weight loss last time she was on the medication. “It sucks, because I do feel like I need them to function properly. No one seems to understand that.”

“I think I have some idea of what you’re going through. My brother says that he feels a lot more calmer on the inside and is able to focus better when he’s on his medications,” Stina told her. “I think it’s admirable that you’re doing such a good job even though you’re not on your medications.”

“Thank you,” Nina said with a smile. She felt glad to finally have found someone who seemed to understand at least a little bit about her struggles.

The next day at work, Tom walked up to Nina’s desk as he arrived in the morning. She felt hungover, but Stina had made sure that they got to work on time, even a bit early.

“I’m guessing your date went well since you didn’t come home last night,” he told her with a smile.

“It went great,” Nina replied and yawned largely. “She has two cats. I wish I was a cat right now, so I could have a nap.��

“Did you stay up late last night?” Tom asked her with a knowing smile.

“Yeah, time just flew by,” Nina told him with a smile.

“Sounds like you had a good time,” Tom told her warmly and then leaned in to whisper to her. “You should probably have some chewing gum or something, because you smell of wine,” he advised her. Nina blushed in response and grabbed a gum from her backpack along with an energy drink. Tom raised an eyebrow at her. “No energy drinks on the desk, pour it into a coffee cup.”

“Ha! You just violated our deal,” Nina told him, playfully raising a warning finger at him. “We said no complaints about my energy drinks for a full month and it’s only been a week.”

“Right. Just pour it into a coffee cup, please,” Tom requested. “It doesn’t look nice with energy drink cans on the desk.”

“How about cola cans?” Nina questioned, pointing towards a desk in the far back where a man named Erik had a can of Coca Cola on his desk.

“You can tell him to pour his cola into a coffee cup as well,” Tom decided, causing Nina to sigh heavily. She didn’t feel like standing up and walking all the way over to Erik’s desk to tell him that. “Are you feeling hungover?” Tom asked her teasingly.

“Mhm,” Nina answered.

“Have one of these,” Tom offered and handed her a tube of fluid replacement pills. “It’s an effervescent tablet, so you put it in a glass of water and let it resolve before you drink it,” he explained, wanting to avoid any preventable incidents.

“I know, I can read,” Nina said sarcastically as she looked at the pipe of pills. “Thank you, Tom,” she added in a nicer tone of voice and gave him an appreciative smile.

"Oh, and before I forget. Here," Tom offered and handed her four of the pills doctor Freeman had prescribed for her. "Don't take them all at once," he warned her. 

"I won't," Nina assured him. 

Nina didn’t feel well at all as she got up from her seat to talk to Erik. She ran to the toilet and threw up all of the breakfast Stina had so kindly made for her that morning. She could feel the sweat run down her forehead and washed her face. Her head was aching and her stomach was turning at the mere thought of food.

She went to the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water, placing one of Tom’s pills in it. While she was there, she grabbed two empty coffee cups. She put the glass of water and one of the cups down on her desk before walking up to Erik.

“Hi Erik. Mister Hiddleston requested that we from now on should not have any cans on our desks, so I need you to pour your cola into this,” Nina informed the man in his mid-twenties and handed him the cup. He glanced over at Nina’s desk, where the can of energy drink was still sitting.

“Hypocrite,” he said shortly, sullenly grabbing his cola can and emptied its contents into the cup before putting the can on the floor underneath his desk.

“I have to do it too,” Nina informed him wearily. “I know it’s a stupid rule, Erik. But I didn’t make the decision, To- mister Hiddleston did.”

“Your life must be so easy,” Erik told her enviously. “You’ve got a rich stepfather who just gives you a great position in his company one day. Everyone else here has actually worked hard to get their jobs, but you just come here one day and think you’re better than all the rest.”

“What?” Nina asked confusedly. “I don’t think I’m better than everyone else,” she told him truthfully. “A lot of the time I actually think that I don’t deserve to be here.”

“Good, because you don’t,” Erik told her irritably. “Your stepfather should have let you work from the bottom up. That way you might have learned to appreciate how lucky you actually are. But instead he lets you remain a spoiled brat.”

Nina didn’t know what to say to that, so she just went back to her desk. She drank some of the fluid replacement and filled her coffee cup with her energy drink before putting the can on the floor like Erik had done. She took a couple of deep breaths to compose herself and stop herself from bursting into tears at Erik’s hurtful comments.

“Are you alright?” Stina asked and stopped by her desk. She put a hand on Nina’s shoulder, while balancing a tray of hot drinks with the other hand, and smiled encouragingly at her.

“I’m just tired, that’s all,” Nina replied and forced herself to smile.

“I’ll bring mister Cumberbatch and mister Hiddleston their coffees now. Perhaps you should bring mister Scott his tea?” Stina suggested helpfully. “You always seem to be in a better mood after you’ve spoken to him.”

“Thanks, I will,” Nina said as she stood up and grabbed the cup of tea from the tray.

She headed into Andrew’s office and was greeted by one of his sunshine smiles.

“Is something wrong?” Andrew wondered concernedly as his smile faded away from his face. Nina put the tea down on his desk and shrugged. “Nina, talk to me,” he encouraged her. Nina sighed before she spoke.

“Do you think I’m a spoiled brat?” she asked, causing him to smile again.

“A little bit, sometimes,” he replied honestly. “But I don’t see anything wrong with that. I think you’ve grown a lot as a person since you first started working here.

“But I’m not so sure that I deserve to be here,” she told him sadly.

“You do deserve to be here,” Andrew assured her as he got out of his seat to put an arm around her shoulders. “You’re doing a great job and I wouldn’t want anyone else as my secretary. Do you hear that? You do deserve to be here. You’ve earned your spot,” he told her keenly.

“Thank you, Andrew,” Nina told him emotionally and smiled as he hugged her. She truly loved his hugs, they made her feel cared for.

Right after lunch break, before Nina had begun to work, the phone rang. It was Josef, Andrew's partner. 

"Hi, Nina, it's Josef. Do you have time to talk?" came the familiar voice at the other end of the line. 

"I suppose I could grant you a couple of minutes of my precious time," Nina replied with a smile. 

"Great. So what's new with you?" Josef asked. 

"Nothing much… well, I went on a date last night," Nina told him as she began sorting the mail on her desk into different piles. 

"A date? Oh, do tell," Josef said excitedly. "Who's the lucky guy?" 

"Girl," Nina corrected. "Her name is Stina and she's a colleague of mine."

"A workplace romance! That's so sweet," Josef said brightly. "How did the date go?" 

"It went well, I suppose. I spent the night," Nina revealed, smiling as she heard Josef gasp into the receiver. 

"Oh, you naughty girl," he commented in exaggerated shock.

"Oh, you have no idea how naughty I can be," Nina whispered playfully into the receiver, causing Josef to gasp again. "Unfortunately, I need to go now, Josef. Would you like me to pass along a message to Andrew?"

"Tell him that I love him and to buy some wine on the way home. The expensive kind," Josef requested. 

"Okay, I'll make sure he receives your message," Nina replied as she scribbled down the message on a post-it. "Have a nice day, Josef."

"You too, Nina."

Nina smiled to herself as she hung up the phone. Josef called nearly every day, asking her about how she was, and to pass on some sweet messages to his partner. She quite enjoyed his calls when she wasn't too busy to stop what she was doing for a chat. She had told him that right after lunch was a good time for him to call, which he seemed to have remembered.

"Andrew," Nina said as he entered the open plan office space she shared with fourteen colleagues. Her desk was at the front, a bit away from the others'. "Josef called. He asked me to tell you he loves you and that you should buy some expensive wine on your way home," she said, passing him the post-it note. 

"Thanks, Nina," Andrew said, grabbing the pink little piece of paper. "He's not disturbing your work, is he?" he added concernedly. 

"Not at all, we only talk for a few minutes. It's kind of nice, actually. I find myself looking forward to his calls," Nina told him honestly. Andrew’s face lit up at her words and he smiled widely. 

"I'm so glad to hear that," he told her and looked genuinely happy as he walked towards his office.

As the working day finally came to an end, Tom walked up to her desk like he usually did. 

"Are you coming home with me today?" he wondered. 

"Sure," Nina said and grabbed her backpack from under the desk.

"How was your day?" Tom asked as they walked to the car. 

"It was brutal," Nina complained. "I'm never drinking the day before work ever again," she told him. 

"Sounds like a good idea," Tom agreed amusedly.

"How was your day?" Nina asked. 

"It was good, thanks for asking," Tom replied with a smile. "It's been a long week."

“Indeed it has,” Nina agreed, and realised that she had managed to avoid being near Benedict for more than a few minutes at a time ever since the incident on Monday. He hadn’t insisted that they would talk either, which was a great relief. He probably got the hint that she wanted nothing more to do with him. She needed to stay away from him as much as possible, because the feelings of guilt were overwhelming, and what they were doing wasn’t right. It was unfair to Benedict’s wife as well as his children. She didn’t want to tear that beautiful family apart.

“You’ve seemed very focused on your work this week,” Tom commended her once they had gotten into the car.

“Thanks. I’ve tried,” Nina replied and smiled as Tom put on some country music. His music taste was very varied to say the least, she never knew what he would put on next. Her smile faded slightly as she listened to the lyrics.

‘Your cheatin’ heart Will make you weep You’ll cry and cry And try to sleep But sleep won’t come The whole night through Your cheatin’ heart Will tell on you’

Nina sometimes had trouble sleeping when she thought about Benedict’s family, and wondered if Benedict was suffering through a similar sense of guilt. She was kind of hoping he was. That way he might stop doing things he shouldn’t be doing. 

Nina went for a walk that evening, making sure to pass by Benedict’s house. She wanted to see what he was doing. Was he spending time with his family? Was he a good father who didn’t neglect his childrenwhen he was at home? She felt like a creep as she sneaked into the garden and glanced through the living room window. The whole family was gathered. Benedict was sitting on the floor in front of the TV playing a videogame with his oldest son, while Sophie was sitting on the sofa reading a book to their youngest son.

Nina was just about to turn around and walk away, when Benedict seemingly by chance looked up right at her. Her eyes widened with horror before she ran across the garden and climbed over the garden fence. She kept running for a bit before finally slowing down and beginning her walk home. After a moment, her phone rang from a number she didn’t recognise and she picked up.

“Seriously, Nina. What the hell do you think you’re doing?!” It was Benedict’s angry voice on the other end of the line. His anger was probably justified, but she was angry too. How could he be so two-faced? “Answer me! Damn it!”

“Do you ever feel so guilty that you can’t sleep at night?” Nina asked him. She could hear Benedict’s heavy sigh.

“You can’t come around my house just to make me feel guilty,” Benedict told her seriously, his voice calmer now. “Do you have trouble sleeping, Nina?”

“Sometimes,” Nina admitted. “Sometimes I wake up crying. Do you feel guilty, Ben?”

“Of course I do,” Benedict replied. “That’s why I get so angry with you when you come to my house like this, or say things to make Sophie suspicious.”

“If you’re feeling so guilty, then why don’t you come clean?” Nina questioned.

“Because that would ruin my marriage. Sophie would leave with the children,” Benedict told her.

“Your cheatin’ heart will tell on you,” Nina told him seriously. “You’re not as bad of a man as you try to convince yourself that you are, Ben. You do have a conscience and this will eat you up, like it does me.” She hung up before Benedict had the time to respond. She thought it was a good way to end their conversation.

Previous Chapter - Next Chapter

[nahimjustfeelingit-writes]

Imagine:

Erik and the reader in the middle of fucking and the reader tells him, “Erik, I wanna have yo’ baby, please”

“Erik! Up here!”

Erik looked up into the VIP section, his friend with benefits aiming her camera into his face.

“Smile for me!”

He flashed her a smile, all that gold in his bottom row teeth gleaming.

“Thank you friend!”

Erik shook his head away from her, going back to his drink and his group of guy friends. Y/N was dragged along with Erik’s occasional fuck buddy and friend from child hood, Draya. She wasn’t down for coming at first but Draya practically begged her ass to join so she wouldn’t be the only girl there with a group of guys. Plus, she needed some help rounding these niggas up since they were drinking every single bottle brought to them empty. Y/N tried to keep her eyes off of Erik, really tried. She still wasn’t over the way he fucked her the last couple of times. She was afraid Draya would take notice, maybe smell Erik on her.

“You good, girl?” Draya asks, shaking her hips to Drake- Nice For What.

“Yes, just tired,” Y/N didn’t get one look from Erik that night. She wanted him to look her way, she really wanted those eyes on her. She assumed it was because of Draya.

“It’s cool, sis, Erik was checking you out the minute we stepped into this bitch.”

Y/N stopped dancing, covering her face with embarrassment. She really wanted to go now.

“Why are you acting so ashamed? Y’all fuck?”

Draya held nothing back. Y/N pinched the bridge of her nose, taking a seat on the couch within the VIP section. She was thankful that they were in a club, everyone focused on the loud music and drinking.

“Girl, you ain’t gotta act like that with me, Erik dont owe me shit. We’re just friends who fuck around from time to time.”

Y/N stared at Draya. She sounded sincere and had a confidence in the way she spoke that made Y/N believe her.

“Girl,” she shook her head, taking a sip of her drink, “I know y’all had sex. Just tell me.”

Fuck it. Might as well admit to it.

“Yeah.”

“You dont have a man I don’t know about do you?”

“No.”

“So then what’s the damn problem?!”

Y/N wanted Erik to be her man for sure. It was the way he attracted other women. He had this sexy allure and he wasn’t even trying. The shit drove her crazy. He gave off this vibe were anyone wanted to be near him and be like him. She wanted him balls deep in her pussy. That man fucked like he was born to fuck. She wanted him to cum all in her...

“Fuck, you are hooked.” Draya was all laughs.

The minute Y/N looked away from Draya, she caught Erik’s eye. The bitch dancing on him didn’t even matter. She was shaking her ass all on him and Erik wasn’t paying her no mind. Y/N liked that shit. She liked it a lot. He didn’t look away for one second, didn’t even blink. Y/N’s breathing was getting a little heavy. She took the rest of her drink to the head, feeling Drayas hand on hers to bring her attention back to her.

“I can understand, sis, he fucks with so much power. Who am I to deny some top shelf dick to another woman? Erik likes to fuck. It’s just how Erik is. You know. He make you scream his name and ask for his baby yet?”

“Um...” Y/N leaned back and squinted at Draya.

“You sure you aren’t whipped?”

“I love it, any woman would love good dick, but Erik isn’t the man for me. We’re good the way we are.”

“I don’t see how you can fuck him and not want more! He drove me crazy twice and you just straight up casual with it like his good dick don’t have a serious effect on you.”

“How did Erik fuck you the first time? When did it happen?”

Y/N did not need this. She really didn’t need the entire image to pop up in her head like that. But now that it did...whew. Erik wasn’t playing with Y/N.

Erik was staying at Draya’s about a week ago on a Friday night. Draya was working late at the strip club as a bartender and Y/N was off that night so she stayed home to study for finals. Draya and Erik had some wild ass sex a few hours before and now he was stretched out on her bed, sleeping wild and wrapped in the covers. Y/N had to walk past Drayas to get to the bathroom. She stood in Drayas door way, looking at Erik’s sleeping body. He was sleeping on his back, that thick as fuck dick print bulging out of the sheets. He slept so damn pretty. She could still remember the way he looked at her earlier while they sat around eating pizza in the living room. She was like Drayas little sis. Draya was about 6 years older than Y/N and so was Erik.

She needed a hot shower just from admiring him. The inner hoe in her wanted to go in that room, lift the covers back, and see that dick up close. Maybe put it in her mouth and see how it tastes. That would wake his sexy ass up for sure. Y/N made it to the bathroom, slightly closing the door to let some of the steam out. She stripped down out of her ex boyfriends basket ball shorts and wife beater, nothing on underneath. Y/N opened the cabinet that held all of her and Drayas hair products in it, grabbing her silk Louis Vuitton scarf to wrap her TWA. Y/N turned on the shower, making sure it was extra hot to burn away the nerves that tingled from thinking about sucking Erik’s dick.

She pulled the black shower curtain back, stepping inside. The water was the perfect amount of hot and it was actually working. Even scrubbing her pussy under the water didn’t make her think about Erik. Y/N leans out of the shower, grabbing her phone to put on her R&B playlist. Tory Lanez new album played, Y/N going back to scrubbing her body down. While she was scrubbing her ass cheeks the bathroom door could be heard opening and then the shower curtain was pulled back roughly. Standing before her, with a towel around his waist, was Erik himself. He looked just as shocked as Y/N did, covering her body as best as she could but she only had two hands and a lot of ass, titties, and a pussy.

“Shit-I-I-I thought you were Draya. Shit-damn-fuck, I thought you were Draya,”

“Shit, she got pulled into work at the last minute!!” Y/N slaps her forehead, one of her titties falling from her hand. Erik’s eyes were zeroed in on her breast, watching the hot water hit it.

“Fuck,” Erik didn’t hold that one back at all.

“What?” Y/N has her breast again, backing away a little. She was growing hot and it wasn’t the water. He was all prepared to shower and everything. She could only think about that dick right now...

“You got some big titties Y/N.”

“Um, E, I don’t think...”

“Why not,” he held her gaze now, “You don’t want me to see them? I can walk away. I mean, it’s a little too late for that shit I know exactly what Draya little friend got going on now, Mhm.”

That Mhm had her closing her eyes.

“Look.”

Y/N opens her eyes to find Erik without the towel around him. She felt oxygen deprived. Holy Shit. He was really really nice down there. All long, thick, veiny, smooth, chocolate, nice heavy balls, and hairless. She had never seen nor had a dick like that. Ever. No wonder Draya fucked Erik from time to time when she felt like it. Just call Erik up if you wanna feel dick in your spine and guts. Call him up if you wanna he bed ridden for about 24 hours. She didn’t know how long she was staring, but Erik didn’t stop her. He waited for Y/N to pick her jaw off the floor and speak.

“Umm,” she finally broke away, looking back up at Erik with nervous eyes, “It’s-its really nice, Erik.”

“You want some company?” He says all low and tantalizing.

Y/N crossed her legs, pressing her hands further into her breasts, “Erik,”

“How long Draya been gone?” He asked with a raised brow, looking over his shoulder then back at her.

“For about an hour now.” Y/N trailed her eyes back down to his dick again.

“See? That gives us plenty of time to play.”

She bit into the side of her bottom lip, “Play?”

“Yeah,” he smiles, “freaky play,” His voice got even lower, drawing her in, “Don’t you want me to play in that pussy, Y/N?”

“Yes.” She wasn’t going to lie. They both knew she wanted him to. All those looks, all the times Y/N caught Erik leaving Drayas room in the middle of the night after hearing them fuck. It was only a matter of time before Erik had Y/N as well.

“Okay, turn around.”

Y/N finally let go of her breasts, walking towards Erik and turning around. She placed her hands on the shower wall, looking back at Erik while he admires her wet mocha skin.

“Bend over, pretty girl.”

Y/N arched against the wall, poking her wet juicy ass out at Erik. Erik’s hands on her skin set a flame within her. He was so gentle with the way he massaged her cheeks. That all changed when she felt him smack her ass. It was sudden and alarming but she liked it. She’d never been spanked like that before. Now, he had his fingers on her pussy, moving up and down all slow and soft. He was working her wetness all over her pussy. She almost fell forward when his thick fingers pulled her pussy lips apart to rub all in there.

“Mmmmmuhhhhh,” she moaned.

“You loving that I see.”

“Yes, I love that.” She responds with difficulty.

“You really gonna love this.”

He got down on his knees, Erik burying his face in her pussy. She let out a sharp moan, reaching back to hold both of her cheeks open. Her feet slipped a little along the shower floor, making a loud squeak sound but Erik had her legs now, using his mouth and strong jaw to ear her slit. She tried to look back at it but her body was so weak. Now, he wrapped his entire mouth over her pussy, moving around and around, pulling and sucking and slurping on her. She was a heavy squirter so Erik was definitely covered in it for sure. Now, he was moving his tongue on her clit, Y/N’s moans and pleads growing louder and louder over her music.

“You got a phat wet puss, Y/N.” He was French kissing her clit now, “You just letting me eat this pussy. You gonna let me eat it until Draya get here? I’ll let you sit on my face and cum in my mouth. Use my mouth, baby girl.”

“Fffuuuk. You are...so nasty.” She was cumming, unable to control herself as she definitely used Erik’s mouth.

“Mmm, THATS IT. Use me, Bitch.”

Now, Erik was to his feet again, hand around his dick, pre cum oozing our in a long string down to the floor. He opened his slit, showing Y/N the rest of his pre cum before taking his thumb to smooth it all around. If it looked that tasty she could only imagine how his cum tasted.

“It’s so damn big.” Y/N says with disbelief.

“Say that shit when I’m in there deep.”

Erik rubbed his dick up and down her pussy, covering his dick with as much of her wetness as he could. He knew he needed to work her up to it. But he was also ready to bury himself in her velvety walls because she was damn tight.

“I just wanna beat your shit up, ma. You gonna let me beat it up real good, even if it’s too much? Once I’m in there that’s it I ain’t gonna wanna come out.”

That made her heart flutter. He was really making this moment even better. At this point, she didn’t care if Draya came back home. As long as Erik’s long thick dick was in her, she didn’t give a fuck about anything else.

“Fuck me, please?” She asked with desperation.

“You asked so nice and sweet I gotta do it for you, pretty girl.”

Erik finally let his dick rest at her entrance. He pushed forward, his head slipping inside first, that alone splitting her open. Then, his shaft squeezed in too, trying to make room for all ten inches of him. It was going and going and Y/N didn’t think it would ever end. It hurt so good though. She gasps when he was fully in, his balls smacking her clit.

“Please fuck me,” she begged. Y/N was holding onto the railing in the shower now. Erik pulls all the way out to the tip of his dick, before sinking back inside. He did this over and over until Y/N was dripping to the shower floor; literally. Now, her pussy was making squelching sounds, his dick sliding in and out like she’d been lubbed down heavy. He picked up the pace, watching her face to make sure she reacted to what she was feeling, sure enough, Erik had her making so much noise. She was talking nonsense and gibberish.

“You’re a slut for letting me fuck this tight pussy. Got this pussy so wet, fuck, keep wetting my dick up!”

“Erik! You got my pussy dripping!” Her eyes closed, face smashed against the shower wall. He was really giving her heavy back shots in that shower. Had her ass bent over and taking his dick. Erik couldn’t hold back how much he was loving it. She was so damn tight and super soaker wet.

“Make me cum, please? Make my pussy cum all over you, please, please, please! Ahhhhhmmmfuckkkkk!!!” She gave him a silent scream before cumming on his dick.

“SHIT! Take it, slut, take it, take it-fuck!!”

Erik pulled out, cumming on her ass and pussy lips. He was shooting out ropes of cum, the most he’d cum in a minute. And it happened before he wanted it to. His impressive cum load made Y/N smile, her fingers reaching behind her to grab some of it, tasting the sweet cum. He must eat a lot of pineapples....

——

“Damn, in the shower?” Draya had low lustful eyes at that damn story. Y/N was even turned on. She didn’t even give all the details for that first time. He made her sit on his face and he fucked her again from the back on her desk chair with her ass poked out. He was fucking her in a circle since it swiveled, her window all open and she was sure people could see and hear.

“What about the second time?” Draya was full on in story time mode. Y/N looked over towards Erik and noticed that him and his boys were still in party mode, dancing and rapping to the music.

“You better not go home rubbing your pussy to this, Draya!”

“Shit, I just might,” she laughed into her cup.

Y/N scoots closer towards her, curling a single finger for her to come here. When Draya did, Y/N laid it on her....

——

Erik came back over another day when Draya was out. He specifically made sure of that because he didn’t need his home girl knowing that he was fucking her “little sis”. He grabbed the spare key from over the top of the door, opening it, satisfied to hear Y/N moving around in the kitchen. The minute he walked inside, he was blessed with the sight of Y/N wearing a pair of white cotton panties that looked painted on, a pink bra, and that cute curly TWA out. Her skin was so damn smooth and chocolate. It reminded him of maple syrup. She tasted like syrup too.

“Hey, beautiful.”

She was startled, turning towards him with a jiggle of her ass.

“Erik?!” He could see a shiver run up her spine.

“You cooking something,” He tried to see what she was up to.

“Just, mushroom Alfredo.”

He was hungry too. He could get some good pussy and some food. That was a plus.

“You gonna feed a nigga? I’m gonna be here for a while if you know what I mean,” he gave her a big dimpled grin.

“No, I don’t know what you mean.” She tried to play it off.

“You do,” Erik walked up on her short frame, making her turn towards him.

“You’re brain working now?” He was bending lower to bring his face close to hers. She looked from his nose to his lips, licking her own.

“E,”

“Shhh,” he pressed his finger against her mouth before rubbing her lips, “I know your still hungry for me, shit, I know I want you that’s for damn sure. And I came here to get it. You’re gonna give me that pussy, Y/N.”

“Fuck,” she gave him a defeated look that only made him happy. He kissed her neck, dragging his hands down her back and under her ass, lifting her up and to her bedroom. Erik was so damn generous when he fucked. He was really into kissing and he was really good at that shit. He had Y/N sopping wet with his tongue and lips on hers alone. Finally, in her room, Erik places her on the bed, Y/N getting on her knees in front of him to undress him fully. She had her lips parted, eyes on her every move with each piece of clothing that fell. Now, he was standing before her fully naked again. She ran her hands up and down his body, memorizing every muscle, scar, hair, and birth mark. She especially liked the birthmark he had on his abdomen. She licked it, causing Erik to hiss.

“Grab my balls and squeeze it with those soft ass hands,” he demanded. Y/N did what she was told, squeezing his hairless nut sack. His eyes fluttered shut, hands reaching out to caress her shoulders.

“You have such a pretty dick, Erik,” she was nibbling on her lip.

“Oh yeah? What you love about this dick?”

“It’s so long and thick, Daddy. Such a fat head and a fat sack. It’s so much dick daddy I don’t know if my mouth could take it all but I’ll try, Daddy.”

“You nasty bitch, let me take this shit off you.”

Erik hovers over her short body, unclamping her bra and lowering her panties. She left a big ass wet spot in her underwear. He was sucking her nipples now, flicking them with his tongue too. Now, he was placing soft kisses on her belly while his hands flicked her hard nipples, enjoying her soft moans. She was driving him crazy.

“You got me ready to eat this pussy again. Look at you,” He was between her legs, his lips kissing her pussy softly.

“You’re so delicate with a nice tight pussy I gotta give you soft wet kisses.”

“Fuck, you got me so wet,” she spread her thighs, sitting up on her elbows.

“Let me hear it,” Erik whispers.

She takes her fingers, sucks on them, then puts them in her pussy. She wiggles her fingers around in there while giving him an erotic look. Erik could hear it alright. It was so damn loud in that quiet room.

“How does it sound? You hear it?” She was all in her pussy. Three fingers deep.

“Oh, I hear that pussy. Got my mouth watering.”

“Eat me, please?” She brought her fingers to her clit to rub.

“You are a nasty little slut. Playing in this tight pussy and begging me to eat it and fuck it. You must want me to have you dick whipped and begging for all this dick and cum, huh?”

“I want you to cum in me.” She opens her pussy lips, “I wanna have your baby, please?”

“What the fuck,” Erik closed his eyes, his dick harder than it already was, “You want me to make that belly full of my cum? You nasty bitch.”

“Cum right in here,” She opened up wider, bringing her legs up to show him where she would love it, “Right in this tight wet hole.”

“FUCKKK-shit don’t make no sense how nasty you are. Draya know you’re this kinky? Goddam.” The tightening in his balls was too much and it let him know that her nasty talk was about to make him cum alone. Erik smacks her hands away from her pussy, replacing it with his mouth. He munched on her slit like he was a starving man; like pussy was the last meal on earth. She was weak beneath him. Her eye brows were scrunched, lip between her teeth, moans loud.

“Make me cum, make me cum,” she shutters, “make me cum, make me cum...”

She was blown away, hands in his hair, pussy driving into his mouth, sweet pussy juices flowing. He nibbled on her pussy until she was clean and ready for dick.

“I’m cumming in you.” Erik knew she was straight, he’d cum in her pussy deep.

She was overwhelmed with lust. He could cum all he wanted in her she was protected. She’d never told a guy that at all until Erik fucked her. Shit was bizarre but she liked it. Erik on the other hand was used to bitches telling him that, his dick was that good that they wanted him to risk it all. This would be his first time risking anything but Y/N was so damn addictive. Kinky and freaky.

“Oh, fuck, that fat dick!”

He was digging in her sweet pussy. She had her legs over his shoulders, Erik pounding away inside of her. She was good around his dick.

“Damn, girl, I’m loving this pussy!” This was only fuck number two.

“I love your fat dick! It’s so fat and long and oooooooooh it’s so deep in me! fuck me until you buss, daddy. Buss in me.”

Erik places his fingers in her mouth, his eyes watching the way he fucked her. Her cream was making a big ass mess in the sheets. She twirled her nipples for him, pulling them and making them bounce too.

“You want me to shoot this cum all inside of you? Huh? You nasty bitch. You want me to cover this whole pussy with all of my nut? Huh?”

“Oh, Daddy, yes!!” She could feel Erik folding her body some more. He was over her even more using the strength of his hips to stroke in her pussy. Looking from behind a lucky person would have the nastiest view of Y/N’s pussy being drilled.

“You fuck my pussy so damn good, yeah,” Y/N was in shambles.

“Ima FUCK this pussy good whenever I please.”

The thought of Erik fucking her whenever and however had her cumming on his dick again.

“Oh shit-oh FUCKKK, you...got me...cumming.” Erik was lost in the moment, his eyes never leaving hers, that helpless look from being dicked down on her face.

“You the baddest bitch on the planet!” Erik told her between intense strokes.

“OhmyGoddd! Your cumming! I can feel that dick pumping! Oh, Daddy, it’s filling me up! Yes!”

Erik was indeed cumming inside of her. She milked him dry with her tight walls.

“More, I want more,” she begged.

“You draining me,” Erik was fucking defeated. She milked him dry with her pussy. She had the type of pussy to wife her up. Y/N was the truth.

“Let me suck your pretty dick.”

Erik slips out of her, watching Y/N arch on the bed with her phat ass in the air, making her cheeks bounce on purpose with all his meat in her mouth. She had those cheeks all sunken in, her eyes blinking up at him innocently. He was gonna cum again.

“You pretty little slut. I just wanna cum on your face.”

“Cum on my face,” she encouraged.

“And then what? You gonna lick it all off yourself?” Erik could feel his balls retract, his nut right around the corner.

“I’m your little cum slut.”

“FUCK Y/N!!!”

He shot his load all over her face. She caught some in her mouth but damn, Erik gave her a face paint. The sight alone had him jerking his dick to get more cum to spurt all over her.

“Shit, I hope Draya dont come home no time soon, I’m not finished with you yet.”

Y/N was more than ready.....

——

“WOW.” Draya was open mouthed and shocked.

“I know,” Y/N lets out a shaky breath before finishing off her new drink.

“If Erik Don’t make you his girlfriend, something is wrong.”

She could only hope he wanted that. Y/N moved her eyes back over to him, he was staring straight at her. Those eyes said it all. He wanted her right now just the same. Y/N licks her lips at him, making him bit down on his lip. There was no need in being discreet, she wasn’t ashamed to be fucking that man too.

@tgigoldie @soufcakmistress @chefjessypooh @chaneajoyyy @pananegra @theblulife @becincere @blaqwidow91 @fish-outta-watah @moonlight-night-sky @eyeknowmywrites  @crowngold @njadakillthiscookie @blktinkerbell @luvanxi @sheisexcellent1 @chocolatedippedinhoney  @brandithecrystalgem @dababydababydababydababy @soulfulbeauty19 @btitannaaa @sunkissedebony97 @youngblackndgifted @harleycativy @rbhp @thee-germanpeach @thadelightfulone @bugngiz @palmstreesallday @skylahb @bakaris-shorty @nizzle-mo​ 

[maybecoolwords]

Not Enough ..

Pairing: Erik Stevens x plus size!reader

Word count: 2 192

Summary: Owning a company and working for it is not easy, but with a special someone by your side, it can become bearable. But what if that special someone ends up making it harder than it already is ?

Warnings: A little bit of Angst and then more fluff.

A/N: Hey guys, ever since I started reading fanfic, I’d rarely find any fanfic where the reader is the ceo, and those are actually some of my favourites to read. I’ve always wanted to write a fic where the reader is a strong independent woman, not that those don’t exist I actually read plenty of them, and I got recently inspired by @jalapenobarnes​ ‘ amazing series Sweet Life, except that I wrote this one-shot for Erik Killmonger instead of Bucky Barnes. I hope you guys like this one, and I recommend you read Sweet Life because it’s honestly one of my favourites.

The light of your laptop in front of you just blended with the sunlight breaking through your curtains. It’s a normal office day, except, it wasn’t so normal..

You’re sitting on your office chair. A black large chair, matching perfectly with your black large desk. You sat there for the past 92 minutes, since eight A.M to be exact, just thinking. The sound of the clock on the left wall was the only noise in the room. Or rather.. office. Your eyes are lost and a little puffy from all the crying you did during the previous night. Your right hand over your mouth, picking at your lips, a bad habit you just can’t seem to get rid of no matter how hard you tried. After all, it only happens when you’re deep in thought or concerned about something. You sat there just staring aimlessly at your windows, thinking…

The sound of your phone machine sounded through the room, now adding much more noise to the previously slightly calm environment you isolated yourself in for the past 94 minutes.

You were calm at first, you knew exactly who it was. He always calls on the same exact time every day he wasn’t visiting you at the office, that’s why you asked your assistant months ago to always forward his calls to your machine, no exceptions. Simply because you miss him, even if you’ve seen him that same morning when he begged you over and over to just stay in bed and take the day off..

But today, he has been calling your own phone nonstop, but since you kept ignoring his calls, he decided to call your office. His actions of the night before were the exact reason you found yourself so unproductive and just tired this morning.. Tired of thinking of him, of trying to find a way to justify his choice of words. And especially tired of repeating that same exact scene over and over again …

You’re standing at the bar, with a fresh drink in your hand, just enjoying the classy tunes the string ensemble are playing, but also watching everyone at the event. You’ve always liked to see how everyone showed their fakest smiles just to hide their deep insecurities.

Your eyes suddenly land on the one man you really wanted to be standing next to. Except, he wasn’t alone. Erik was talking with a woman and a man, and it seems to be a casual conversation, possibly about work, since that’s what GALAs are secretly meant for.

You were starting to get really bored standing there alone. To be honest, you brought that on yourself after having dismissed any man who came looking for a hot date. Well who can blame you; you only have eyes on one man… The one who didn’t bother to come looking for you after having ditched you when you first stepped into the room.

After you finished your drink, you decided to go to him. The bright red strap dress you’re wearing hugs your curves perfectly, which ultimately attracts everyone you walk by, and the high slit on your left leg that reached your thigh was just the perfect amount of revealing you’re looking for (mind the cleavage, because your body is an artwork). The men who publicly act like they’re repulsed by having a woman battle in their field are secretly lusting over you, and that just added more to your confidence. And the women in that same field are constantly cheering for you to go on, reminding you that woman power is stronger.

Unfortunately, your lovely dress was also making it kind of hard for you to breath because of how tight it is, hence why you chose to stand during the remaining of this super important charity GALA your best friend decided to throw.

Once you reached your boyfriend.. Or was he really your boyfriend? You don’t know. Each time you try to bring that subject up, Erik just decides to play a little dirty (which you don’t mind) you just end up forgetting about the whole ordeal. Does he do it intentionally or not, you didn’t figure that out yet.

But once you reach Erik, he turns quietly around with a charming – only for work – smile on his lips. He turns fully around, but once his eyes land on you, his beautiful smile vanishes, and his hand quickly tugs yours off of his shoulder.

«Sweetheart, I was waiting for you for the past thirty minutes, where have you been?» You asked in a tone just loud enough for the old (well, not really old) couple and Erik to hear.

«Oh, do you two know each other?» Asked the older man before taking a sip of his drink.

«Well-

«No, not really-» Erik was quick to cut you off, which immediately set your eyes on him, just waiting to hear what he has to say. «-Our companies had a project together a year ago and that was it, strict professionally based acquaintance.» Added Erik whose attention is now solely focused on the older couple in front of you.

«Oh, well, that’s what these GALAs are made for isn’t it? » Started the older man again. «Just to know your work colleagues on a more personal level, right? » He said with a chuckle at the end.

Your eyes never left Erik, you’re so shocked by his words and his calm demeanour that you just couldn’t feel anything else, other than betrayal and… hurt. And he just stood there, sipping on his scotch and a smug grin tugging at his lips. His proud stance makes you sick; you just want to leave that room.

«Excuse-me. » You said after it suddenly got harder to breathe, and walked away. Once you reached the exit doors, you felt the first tear of the night go down your cheek. You took a left turn on the long corridors and you started running. You didn’t want to give any of those unworthy people the satisfaction of seeing you cry over whatever reason. So you kept running, ignoring the calls of your name coming from the same guy behind your sadness.

That was until you reached the limo you came in, and quickly got in with the help of your driver, sparing Erik a simple glance his way before the driver speeds away, just to show him how hurtful his words were – are.

«Darling? »

His smooth voice broke you out of the trance you were is for the past few minutes. During that time, Erik managed to come into your office without you noticing him. He stood at the corner of your desk. His phone in hand, still calling your office phone number for what could be the thousandth time. He then reaches for the annoying machine and shuts it up, making the room go back to it’s previous silence.

«Were you just not gonna answer the phone ?» Erik’s smooth voice could almost make you jump over to him and give him a heartfelt hug, but that was the key word - almost. « What if it someone important was calling ?»

«I’m not in the mood to answer any calls.» Your hoarse voice was proof enough of how tired you are this not-so-fine morning. Your thumb and middle finger were massaging the sides of your forehead for a while until you took them away to get a good look at Erik, but never once looking him in the eyes. You just watch him sigh and look down at his shoes in shame and disappointment, not in you, but in himself. You’ve always been good at reading him, even if he isn’t such an open book. As for him, he knows exactly why you’re so calm.

«Baby look-»

«Don’t call me that.» You cut him off before he could manage to get another word out. You said it so calmly and quietly that he almost couldn’t hear it. He’d say he’s surprised of your calm demeanour if he didn’t know he was the reason behind it, but he’s guilty, and he knows he is.

«Y/N, I said what I said last night for a good reason, just please hear me out.» He sighed, «I didn’t say anything about us being a thing because we’ve never had a proper discussion about it, and I just ...» Once he heard your giggle, realizing you’re not paying attention to what he was saying, he stopped himself. «Baby, come on.» He added.

«I think I finally figured out why you always love for us to sneak around.» You chuckled. Your eyes looking at his for the first time. You finally decided to get up and get closer to him. «Never sitting next to each other during press conferences, ditching me at every party we go to together, never once going on ANY date, unless of course consider sex in my house or yours a date; God knows I don’t.» You screamed at him.

Once you’re only inches away from him (and seconds away from punching him), you took a few breaths and headed towards your floor to ceiling glass windows. That beautiful view really does help calm you down.

You’ve never once raised your voice at him. Because you just aren’t that kind of a woman. You always liked to solve any problem you two faced in your relationship without resolving to screaming matches. But seeing you lose your cool behaviour for the first time proved how truly hurt you are, and it’s another stab in the heart for him.

«Look -», You said again still looking away, «- I know I’m not the kind of girl any guy would wanna show off to the world, and I get it, trust me. But knowing that you’re so ashamed of me that you wouldn’t admit just to knowing me.. That hurts.» Your voice broke at the end, and that’s when you felt your not so first tear of that morning, falling down your cheek. «No matter how successful I can get, my body still stands in my way to find love.» You added, and just when you reach your hand to wipe it away, Erik’s already beat you to it.

«Don’t you EVER say that again.» He said in a broken voice, showcasing a little of his own broken heart. He held your hand, and cupped your cheek using his other hand. «Baby please look at me.» He’s literally begging you at this point but he doesn’t care, his main and only concern right now is not to lose you over such a petty subject. He’s already beating himself up for making you cry, and worse, for making you feel so insecure about yourself. He just can’t tolerate the concept of you having these ridiculous thoughts about him being embarrassed of you or your relationship.

«Baby I’m so sorry for what I did last night, but I promise you that I didn’t mean to make you feel this way.» He started when you looked at him in the eyes for the first time today (and hopefully not last). With those watery doe eyes you have, and that cute little pout on your lips, he just couldn’t help falling in love with you even more. «Baby I know I’m a real asshole for what I said yesterday, and honestly, I don’t even deserve you allowing me to touch you right now... Sweetheart you’re the most wonderful thing to ever happen to me, and I don’t plan on losing you anytime soon. I did what I did last night because I didn’t want those entitled people to think that you’re so successful today because of me, I wanted them to know that you’re independent and capable on your own self darling. I don’t want them to mock you or even think of disrespecting you in anyway. I thought I was in some way protecting you from those monsters.»

Hearing those pet words come from him again gave you such a warm feeling. And honestly, his explanation did make sense to you. In his own way, he was protecting you and you’re happy and unbelievably grateful to have such a sweet person by your side. You finally let a little grin break on your face, and seeing you smile again made him smile too. In a genuine moment you just grabbed his face a landed a quick peck on his lips before you said : «I love you, so much.»

«I love you too, so much more.» He answered before grabbing your face back, in a desperate attempt to feel your lips on his again. His lips brushed yours, in the softest way possible, not at all rushed, going as fast or as slow as you allow him. You just wanted to feel the warmth of his skin on yours, before your assistant comes stumbling in. It was after a little while that you both had to pull away, out of breath.

“So, are you ready to go public, miss Y/L/N?” Asked Erik, still holding you tight in his arms.

“As ready as I’ll ever be, Mr. Stevens.”

[trombonesinspace]

Typhoid Mary: feminist femme fatale?

“Season 4 was going to be Typhoid Mary, Alice Eve [who played the role in Iron Fist], we were doing a kind of...I had a much different version of her than what Raven [Metzner] had done in Iron Fist. I was kind of rebooting what she was going to be like, and we were going to do a, you know, kind of a warped love story/murder mystery kind of femme fatale, but kind of a modern-day, feminist version of it, as opposed to kind of the older, sexist kind of femme fatale archetype.”

-Erik Oleson, in conversation with Steven DeKnight, SaveDaredevilCon 

As I said yesterday, I have some thoughts about this! If you want some opinions nobody asked for, about a storyline that may never come to pass, you’ve come to the right place! Let’s dive in.

A femme fatale is a character type with quite a history, that can take various forms. She is always an attractive woman who brings ruin to the man who gets involved with her. But sometimes she is deliberately manipulative, while sometimes she is more a victim of circumstances. She may be evil, or she may be sympathetic/tragic. But whatever her moral alignment, she has two defining traits: sexual allure, and some form of negative consequences for the hero as a result of his involvement with her.

A woman who schemes against the hero, and succeeds in harming him, but without using feminine wiles? Not a femme fatale. The Marvel TV universe has featured several examples on different shows: Madame Gao, Mariah Dillard, Alexandra. And, ironically, the version of Typhoid Mary who appeared in Iron Fist. (We’ll get there.)

A sexy woman who tries to manipulate/damage the hero, but fails? Also not a femme fatale. I wish I could give some examples, but sadly I can’t think of any, in dramas at least. Our current media culture loves a sexy manipulator, no writer ever seems to introduce one into a dramatic story without making her succeed in her schemes, to some extent at least.

Which is unfortunate, from my perspective, because I loathe sexy manipulators. It’s a character type I really dislike, whenever I encounter her. As soon as she shows up, I know the hero is going to fall for her bullshit like a chump, and I’m going to end up respecting him less as a result. I could try to unpack my feelings about this a bit more, but that would probably make a post all on its own, so for now I’ll leave it at that.

This doesn’t mean I hate all femmes fatales—it really depends on her motivation and her behavior. If she isn’t trying to harm the hero, and it happens due to circumstances, then I might like the character, but the story becomes a tragedy. Which is not necessarily bad. Just, you know. Tragic.

Anyway! Let’s talk about Typhoid Mary.

Mary Walker is a woman with Dissociative Identity Disorder (multiple personalities), and high-level combat skills. In the comics, she is also a mutant with mental powers. She appeared in the Daredevil comics starting in 1988.

In this original version, her personality fragmented due to childhood abuse, leading her to vow as an adult that no man would ever hurt her again. Her personalities are: Mary, who is timid and gentle; Typhoid, who is adventurous, lusty, and violent; and Bloody Mary, who is even more violent, sadistic, and hates all men.

Mary becomes romantically involved with Matt Murdock, who is cheating on his girlfriend, Karen Page, to be with her. At the same time, Typhoid is trying to ruin him, having been hired to do so by the Kingpin. Matt can’t tell they’re the same woman, because when she switches personalities all her bio signs change (voice, scent, heartbeat, etc) so much that he can’t recognize her. (Uh, sure.) She may also be using some of her mutant powers to confuse his senses. I haven’t read the comics, I’m relying here on what I could learn from the internet.

Eventually Typhoid drops him off a bridge, but then Mary finds him and gets him to a hospital, saving him. Karen is with him when he wakes up, but he breaks her heart by calling out for Mary.

This storyline...does not thrill me. As I said, I haven’t read it, but comics writing about mental illness is generally neither nuanced nor accurate, and comics writing about women circa 1988 is also not great, by today’s standards. And comics Matt’s disastrous love life is legendary—cheating on your girlfriend is bad, Matt! Don’t do it! 

I have, however, watched season 2 of Iron Fist, where we get a different version. This Mary Walker is a US army veteran, special ops, who was captured by the Sokovian military. Her personality fragmented due to the brutal abuse she received from her captors for nearly two years, until she finally escaped. She got a medical discharge from the army after being diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Her personalities are: Mary, who is innocent and naive; and Walker, who is a ruthless, coolly efficient mercenary-for-hire. The existence of a third, ultraviolent personality, previously unknown to either Mary or Walker, is revealed near the end of the season. 

Mary meets and befriends Danny Rand, while Walker is hired by his enemies to stalk him, and eventually capture him so they can steal his Iron Fist powers from him. She later changes sides, getting hired to bring down Davos, the season’s main villain, by Joy Meachum, his former ally.

There are clear parallels to the Daredevil comics storyline, albeit in less extreme form—Mary befriends the hero, but isn’t romantically involved with him; her more violent personality works against him and fights him, but doesn’t try to destroy him. 

I enjoyed this version of the character more than I expected to, for a couple of reasons. For one, she is never the out of control, “crazy” stereotype of a person with mental illness. Both Mary and Walker are more-or-less functional adults, managing to live a strange hybrid life, aware of each other’s existence even though they don’t share memories.

But what I especially like is that she isn’t sexualized, at all. It’s incredibly rare, in my experience, to see a young, female antagonist opposing a male hero, and not have her be sexy. Older women are exempt from this obligation (see my list of examples above), but the young ones always vamp it up, and I am so tired of it. I am not opposed to sexy women, but I am very opposed to the requirement that all women must be sexy. (Unless they’re old.) Male antagonists aren’t required to be alluring, so why should women be? (Yes, I know why. I just don’t like it.)

There’s also a lot of potential YIKES in sexualizing a woman with a severe mental illness, which was caused by (among other things) repeated sexual violence. Could it be done in a way that isn’t super problematic? It’s possible, sure. Am I assuming that most television writers would give the subject the respect it deserves? NOPE! 

I’m really glad they chose to just not go there. Walker is extremely good at what she does, takes no shit from anyone, and (almost) never gets riled up. After everything she’s been through, nothing in her present life has the power to faze her, and none of the men around her have the power to intimidate her. It’s pretty great!

She isn’t the least bit coy or seductive, and, equally refreshing, none of the men try to sexualize her or hit on her. Everyone Walker talks to knows she is a highly skilled professional, and they treat her accordingly. Or, when someone does disrespect her, it’s never gendered as far as I can remember, and it stops as soon as she calmly states what she’s going to do to him if it doesn’t.

As for Mary, although she has a more feminine appearance than Walker (hair down and loose, makeup), she is also not sexualized. Her friendship with Danny, who is in an established relationship with Colleen Wing, is platonic, and no one else tries to hit on her that I remember.

So this is the version of Typhoid Mary that Erik Oleson was going to reboot, into a femme fatale. Only, you know. A feminist one. 

I...have some questions. What does that even mean? What does feminism mean to Erik Oleson? Let’s be real, the idea of a woman becoming an ultraviolent, sadistic man-hater as a result of sexual trauma would have been seen as feminist in some circles, back in 1988 when that version was written. So what, exactly, did he have in mind?

As I said before, sexual allure is a necessary component of a femme fatale. So she was definitely gonna be sexy. And you know now how I feel about sexy female antagonists. As for the “warped love story” part...Matt wouldn’t be cheating on Karen, since they aren’t together (please, for the love of mercy, don’t have them get together right before he meets Mary, we did that once and I do NOT want to see it again), but I am still not a fan of Matt/Mary as a couple.

Her Dissociative Identity Disorder raises some serious issues around consent, and even if the show chose to ignore that, there’s still the issue of past sexual trauma. Unless Oleson’s reworking of the character was going to include a completely different back story, a Matt/Mary relationship would mean Matt unknowingly having sex with a woman who has suffered brutal sexual abuse in her past. Not to mention, having sex with her that only one part of her personality actually wants.

Is it possible for someone with Mary’s past trauma and present mental illness to have a positive sexual relationship? In reality, of course! In the hands of writers with only a layman’s knowledge of psychology, on a show that loves to torment its hero, I wouldn’t bet on it. How do you suppose our poster boy for Catholic guilt would react when he inevitably finds out the truth?

Plus, aside from any issues around Mary herself, Matt starting a relationship with anyone other than the handful of people who already know his secret identity, means a whole new round of Matt lying to someone he cares about. Does anyone really want to see that? I know I don’t. Sure, maybe he’d tell her eventually, but how long would they have to date before he decided to trust her with the truth?

I’m not opposed to the Mary Walker from Iron Fist appearing in Daredevil, if the writers could come up with a new story for her (i.e, don’t just have her repeat all the same plot beats with Matt that she already did with Danny). But bringing her in as a femme fatale really doesn’t sit well with me. We’ve already seen Matt in an ultimately destructive relationship with a sexy, violent, morally grey woman. I really don’t want to watch Round 2: now with multiple personalities!

Of course, maybe we never will. The quote at the beginning of this post is from just a couple of weeks ago (July 25 2020), so Erik Oleson still seems to think it’s a fine idea. But obviously we don’t know yet if there will ever be a season 4, or who the show runner will be if there is. He may never get to make the story he was planning.

So yes, I realize I’m merely speculating about a completely theoretical story that may never happen. But I wanted to write this anyway. I had a strong “ugh, no” reaction to the idea of a feminist femme fatale Typhoid Mary, and I wanted to go deeper and pick apart my reasons for not liking the idea.

To the three of you who have read this all the way through to the end (this post is nearly 2000 words, yikes), thank you for indulging me! These are, as always, my own opinions, and YMMV. 

[thecurseisinourblood]

Obsession vs Love

Merry Christmas all! So I have a gift for you... I wasn’t going to post this until it was finished but I got into a bit of a rut, but I have been sitting on this for months. Originally this was meant to be a oneshot between Erik and Frollo and it turned into 16 pages of detailing Frollo’s progression of feelings leading up to and after seeing Esmeralda. Enjoy! General Mature content warning.

Claude Frollo reached the time in his life when he accepted a lot of things. His thirties were gone and he was grateful. This was a decade where he had been ravenous for status and particularly ruthless in character. Looking back, it seemed his repressed youth had blossomed during that time and his past behavior sometimes embarrassed him to this day. He had been moody yet confident in ways he never before experienced within his personality. Though never being wild, there was a crazed side of him that was manipulative and hungry for power over others, particularly in social interactions. Any witty insult that could roll off his tongue or opportunity to correct someone’s facts were never missed. His parents had been cruel to him and in these small ways it felt good to finally speak his mind without decorum. These were his selfish years.

“I am happy you have come out of your shell, but you have become absolutely unbearable to everyone,” Lucy said to him after insulting a woman who had been taking up his time with idle chatter in an attempt to catch his interest. “I finally don’t care what anyone thinks of me,” he remembered saying to her. It took him over thirty years to stop worrying about strangers’ opinions. 

He had looked at women more. Admiring them, their pretty faces and perfectly toned bodies, but became frustrated speaking to them as most of them were self-serving or not intelligent. In his teenage years he would secretly leer at women, but it was in a more passive and curious manner. The sexual frustration became more exhausting than maddening over the years. No one could keep his interest, no matter how stunning. There was a time when he could charm a woman that would gladly take him to bed. As much as he longed for that experience, the thing he yearned for most was a connection that wasn’t hollow. So, when his personal assistant began seeing one of the two judges who mentored him, he became envious. Lucy and judge Remy became an item despite their twenty odd year age gap.  During this time, Frollo was more distant with Remy than ever before. The elder judge would reach out to him as he had in the past, but Frollo wasn’t interested. It was childish, but to him it was a breach of trust. 

Claude was the last one to figure out they were together. Despite knowing Remy was on a break from his wife, Remy always flirted with Lucy, so he thought nothing of it. Lucy should have been above such vulgar charm. Little did he realize they were in a full fledged relationship. Since Lucy was the only female he had ever been attached to, Frollo quietly simmered in his jealousy. “Why did no one tell me they were together?” Frollo looked ahead and clenched his jaw. Jean-Pierre watched Claude closely and saw his fight to remain collected. He never expressed himself, but Jean-Pierre easily detected frustration. How could I not see it? Is what the eldest judge imagined him to say instead. Frollo had a new nickname that was beginning to gain traction in the media. If the young man didn’t change his ways, it would stick forever. The Marble Judge. Jean-Pierre could see it causing issues down the line. “I’m sorry, dear boy. I genuinely thought you knew.” In fact, it had become quite apparent, but Claude wasn’t equipped to pick up on these emotional nuances. Jean-Pierre learned this early on when he began mentoring him out of college as an intern. Claude could pick apart a stranger’s motives, behaviors, even business plans like a computer, but as soon as the relationships grew closer to him, all of those observation skills became useless. Frollo had a lack of understanding of any form of emotional intimacy. He gathered it was because his parents never nurtured him. Though they all tried to cross that bridge with him, Frollo proved to have an impenetrable wall around his heart. Frollo turned to look at the old man. Did Jean-Pierre detect…jealousy? “How was I supposed to if everyone refused to inform me?” Jean-Pierre didn’t know how to answer that without offending him. Instead, he sensed a deeper issue. Frollo never approved of Remy’s flamboyant lifestyle and he was quite fond of Lucy. “Do you have feelings for her? Or is it because you find Remy to be an utter scoundrel?” Frollo’s skin paled and Jean-Pierre put his hand on the man’s back. “Why didn’t you tell her if that was the case?” He asked gently, but Frollo knitted his brow in anger. “That’s not it,” he tried to recover by acting irritated. “It doesn’t make any sense. We all know Remy is going to go back to his wife because he can only go so long without fucking a man. I know Lucy well enough to know she wants monogamy.” Jean-Pierre pursed his lips and removed his hand. Keeping his eyes on his, he kept the boy’s attention. “Relationships rarely make sense if you write them on paper, my boy. That is not what it is about. ” Frollo looked like he was at a complete loss of what to say next, as if Jean-Pierre gave him some profound knowledge...a revelation. 

“Even if Lucy knows Remy will return to his wife, she wants to enjoy it while it lasts. He is a good man and I trust him with my life. So, do you think Remy is a scoundrel?” He asked again, to which Frollo shrugged uncomfortably. “A bit,” Claude grumbled. “And it is natural to like Lucy, she helps you with everything and is very kind. It can be natural to feel jealous, but don’t be too hard on judge Remy for it. You are fond of her, aren’t you?” He knew Frollo liked women, but never dated. To his knowledge, Frollo was still a virgin. Claude’s hands were folded on his lap, but they looked more like fists with their tension. “A bit,” Frollo said more reluctantly. His head had been pointing down for a minute, but he suddenly turned to Jean-Pierre. “Don’t--” He swallowed. “Don’t tell a soul,” Frollo said harshly. Jean-Pierre tried to hide the melancholy from his smile. He didn’t have the heart to tell him that everyone already knew. “I promise not to say a word.” It wasn’t until years later that Claude realized he had never been in love with Lucy. He assumed Lucy knew that in her heart all along. Judge Remy and Lucy were expecting their first child after a year. They married, to everyone's surprise. The ‘break’ from his wife turned out to be final. Remy was deeply in love with Lucy and appeared to have settled down from his swinger lifestyle. Remy once made fun of Jean-Pierre for having a child so late in life, only to walk the same path. However, after some years, Remy began to notice a blossoming friendship between Lucy and a man named Luc. He was doing business that required them to keep in touch and the conversations were growing longer. Remy asked Luc out to lunch one day and quite liked the man himself. Luc was easy to get along with and very attractive. He had never met someone so laid back and funny. As they spoke about Lucy, he could see a twinkle in Luc’s eye. It was the same as Lucy’s.

Ah, young love, and Remy knew that Lucy would never leave him for another man. Remy invited him over for dinners quite frequently. Lucy believed in monogamy, but in Remy’s opinion, love should never be restricted. Lucy was the love of his life and he wanted her to have the world. Luc was an amazing guy and Remy found himself wishing Luc was bisexual. After things developed, Remy had a decision to make. He approached Luc first. “I seem to have noticed that you are in love with my wife….” The expression on Luc’s face told him what he needed to know. The blood seemed to drain from his cheeks. Luc tried to laugh it off a little too late and Remy placed a hand on his shoulder. “I will love Lucy until the day I die,” Remy continued. “But I am finding myself missing certain things.” The judge never wanted to be tied down completely, but it had been a sacrifice he was willing to make for Lucy. He was physically more attracted to men, but his marriage to Lucy was the most fulfilling and euphoric experience he ever had. “You do not seem like a jealous man, Luc. In my mind, she will always be my wife. If you both accept it… I would like to see her from time to time…. If you know what I mean.” Luc readily accepted it while Lucy seemed conflicted. “Divorce you…. And marry Luc?” Lucy’s cheeks were flushed. “You spoke to him first?” “Yes, I did. You don’t have to be shy, my love. I am actually just a little sad that you didn’t tell me. Come on, you know me better than that. Why should I care?” he smiled and continued. “This could be good for us,” Remy took her hand. “I would still like to have private time with you and I will still speak to you like my wife. I will just be… a mostly gay husband. Luc is absolutely fine with it, as long as you are, but I understand if you would like to speak with him first.” Lucy blinked and knitted her brows. She was completely stunned. “Unless you stopped loving me when you fell in love with Luc…” Remy began, which was met with Lucy quickly objected. “And I thought you knew me better than that,” she said, a bit upset. “Oh, I was hoping you would say that,” Remy laughed. “So what do you say? We take a holiday every once in a while, I can have my fun with men again, and you and Luc can have the perfect marriage.” Lucy’s eyes began to water. She didn’t typically cry. She knew how Remy was, but his removal from all forms of jealousy still astonished her. She was just beginning to realize Luc was the same way. “Truly?” She asked him. “I will always give you anything you want,” Remy kissed her forehead.Then he laughed. “And you wanted to be monogamous. Life has a funny way of changing things, doesn’t it?”

~.~.~ By the time Claude turned forty, he gave up on finding a partner. Although, he promised himself not to shut anyone out. He talked to women at parties until he felt his ears would bleed. He attended the theatre often, but as time went on, he stayed at home even more. He went from drinking lightly on occasion to drinking a fair amount at home and at events. The Marble judge finally felt content once he no longer seeked fulfillment from others. He found more joy in his work, in meals, in his personal reading. He cooked more and generally took better care of himself than he ever had in his life. He lied to himself well about never feeling lonely, but there was to be another development. Delice came along a year later. A beautiful and young socialite who was charmingly cruel. Frollo knew if she had been around while he was in his ambitious thirties he would probably be poor on the street by now. She would have taken everything from him. Somehow knowing this, she still appealed to the apathetic part of his soul. They would make such wonderful wasps. As time went on, Frollo became increasingly drawn to her. He was starting to like her and become more comfortable. If it was a trap, he began to care less and less. He ached for someone. They had enough similarities and he adored her air of superiority. Frollo had never been perfect, often thinking there were plenty of people below him. They could judge others and be stuck up together. Delice was the closest thing he had to a crush since Lucy. Frollo never appreciated just how well his colleagues and friends got at reading him. “Delice has been on your arm for months and you actually smiled at her! You were eating her up! I’ve never been so disappointed in you,” Lucy chastised him after a political event. “It’s not like I am going to fuck her, if that is what you are so worried about,” Frollo loathed feeling embarrassed and often acted quite thin-skinned during personal conversations. Lucy called him out on his developing feelings for Delice and at this point, he didn’t even know if what he said was true anymore. “You say that now! I introduced you to plenty of sweet women and you let that snake in our circle like she is your friend. I know she is pretty, but god damn it Claude! You’ve heard things about her too and you know that she is literal filth. This isn’t high school.” “I enjoy our conversations and her company. At least when she speaks, she knows the subject. You know how hard it is for me to find a conversation worth having with these mindless people.” He was defending his actions and feelings more than standing up for Delice and they both knew it. “That is what you are going to say to me?” Lucy had never been this angry with him and she succeeded in making him feel like a teenager being chewed out by his mother. “Do you think I don’t know a man’s eyes when they want to fuck someone? Do you think she doesn’t know? I’ve seen you look at women, but you practically undress her with your stare every time she is close. I know you are one of the most brilliant minds in the world, but you are emotionally stupid. She will rip you to shreds with her teeth and spit you out.” She walked up to him and put her hands on his shoulders. “If you are that lonely, you need to find something else.” He remembered how broken he felt. Her speech opened his eyes and took away the joy he was experiencing for the last few months. Lucy was only trying to protect him and she was absolutely right. His eyes looked to the floor in shame. “I’m sorry, dear,” Lucy said sadly and gave him a hug. He couldn’t breathe. He stood there, unmoving. So, this is what a hug felt like. Wrapping his arms around Lucy, he trembled, keeping his emotions in. He held her tight. He was kidding himself all along. He wanted someone to hold forever. Though he wasn’t in love with Lucy, he knew he would have been happy to spend his life with her, but she deserved the true love she had. She was his closest friend and he clung to those emotions because it was the only time he experienced connection. When she left, he drank himself to sleep in his despair. His bed had never felt so cold. His life returned to how it was and he found that he didn’t miss those few months when he had Delice glued to his side. At the end of the day, none of it was real and he again became content living alone, being alone. He limited his interactions with Delice. She saw this and attempted to cozy up with Lucy, but was shot down. This is when he saw Delice become a bit more aggressive and sometimes trapped him in public conversations so he couldn’t leave. Yet… he couldn’t bring himself to even dislike her. He liked her ambition and her persistence and never treated her unkindly. 

He remembered the events which led up to the day that would change his perception forever. Attending a theatre performance, he remembered a new ballerina named Christine. She did fine in performances, but Charlotte, judge Jean-Pierre’s daughter grew impatient with her. “She’s good, but she is so timid. It is a miracle she can dance in front of an audience. I think her being friends with Meg Giry is the only thing keeping her safe from Madame Giry’s wrath. She would probably cry at the drop of a hat!” It only took weeks before Christine was no longer in the ballet, but the choir instead. Her voice was undoubtedly incredible. Frollo’s eyes widened in surprise one night when the prima donna had some drama and they needed a fill. He immediately became curious. Rumors were circulating and it didn’t take Claude long to figure out why. There was only one Erik he knew with any clout, though most everyone simply referred to him as the opera ghost. He was the manager everyone feared and never saw. “Are you teaching Christine?” Frollo asked his distant, but long-term friend. He remembered the near indecipherable smirk on Erik’s mouth just below the mask. “That sounds more like an accusation than a question.” Frollo observed him quietly with as little expression as possible. Erik loved to get under anyone’s skin, especially his because he was ‘so uptight that it was foolish.’ Meanwhile, Claude thought Erik’s mischief was childish and petty. He was just an old, lonely man desperate to entertain himself. “Either way, I would like to know,” Frollo said. “Why?” Erik was purposefully difficult. “That question was not your intention.” Frollo turned his lips inward in a hard line with evident frustration. “Is the interest strictly professional?” Frollo clarified tartly. Erik poured them some wine for the two of them and there was a solemnity and an amusement sparkling in his eyes that Claude had never seen before. If Christine was timid… this wouldn’t end well for Erik. To this day, even Frollo was wary of the man. “For now,” Erik handed him the wine. Frollo didn’t know why, but he actually believed him when he said it. Perhaps Lucy was right. There was a part of him that was emotionally underdeveloped and despite being able to read people very well, he was sometimes easily fooled. He met Christine before one of the performances. She was incredibly sweet. He thought her apprehension would bother him, but it made it that much easier to be nice to her. She was shy and he made small frequent smiles because of her overall pleasantness. Christine was thoughtful and smarter than he anticipated. However, he got the vibe that the only people who could be mean to her were truly cruel because she had an air of sensitivity and gentleness. 

“So, you are friends with Erik, then?” she asked lightly. Frollo gave her a small smile. “I guess you can say that.”

He could see why Erik would be drawn to her. She was not Claude’s type and he realized quickly that he could never be interested because of a lack of patience -- he was too old for that nonsense! Apparently Erik could read his mind for even thinking of such a thing, because later that night, he was on a warpath. Oh, Erik had raged at him so hard he worried the man would have a heart attack! Frollo’s eyes widened in shock at his demonic fury. He had never seen such an outburst. Wait --  now was he yelling at him because he so much as smiled at Christine? Why did he take Erik’s words for face value? The man was obsessed. Claude felt like an idiot for not seeing it sooner. How many times in his life would he misread the emotions that were right in front of him? “I just wanted to meet her,” Frollo promised. “If that is the girl you like, you could do infinitely worse. If it means a damn thing to you, I approve,” though she was awfully young. He was unwilling to admit to his friend that he thought the union would be impossible. The age gap was too large. For someone as particular as Erik, he expected him to fall for someone more mature… Christine was twenty, but there was a girlish quality that left the impression on Claude that she had a lot of growing up to do. After some time, Erik calmed down. Claude was secretly trembling from the shockwaves of emotions that Erik swallowed him up in like a black hole.The man had a power that was practically supernatural. What frightened him the most was the despair Erik felt. Obviously Erik didn’t think a relationship was possible, but he was going to try anyway. What a fruitless effort! Claude shook his head when he entered his car. The poor man. Unrequited love was a nightmare that Frollo never really considered. He always imagined love to be a progression. Meet, go on dates, grow feelings over a substantial amount of time… What if one fell within moments? A cold chill traveled up his spine before reaching out like an icy hand around his heart. His frigid fingers gripped the steering wheel. If Erik could be afflicted with such blind and unreasonable love, could he also fall ill? Another week passed and although Frollo wasn’t actively seeking new information about Christine, he quietly observed the woman Erik was enamored with. He didn’t understand why the intense attraction to her, but to each their own. She looked like a doll. She was very sweet, but Frollo found himself wondering how Erik could handle her naivety. Perhaps this proved Claude was the bigger cynic afterall. He was too jaded to try to have a meaningful relationship with a woman half his age. At least women near his age had the same temperament: calm, thoughtful, mature…

Tired. Fate had a cruel sense of humor. Everything he thought he knew would be challenged. His world was about to spin. Frollo was thankfully by himself, away from his group to order a drink from the bar before returning. When it happened. Standing at the bar top, he did a double take when he saw Christine with….a friend? 

Claude’s eyes were glued, his heart came alive against his chest as it never had before. If he had his scotch in his hand, it would have slipped from his fingers. Never before did he see a woman who looked like a goddess-- walked like one! The aura she exuded was so powerful that he followed her movement with his eyes without blinking. The girl had the fullest, darkest, and most curly hair he had ever seen. Her eyes were bright green which he had never seen a woman of her complexion have. Her plump lips were covered in a beautiful, matte red lipstick. Everything about her was so tasteful and perfect that he wondered if he was dreaming. If he breathed, he feared she would disappear like mist. Taking the scotch the bartender just poured for him, he used it to cover part of his face as his eyes raked over her body. Her cleavage was full, but not too much and she had such a small waist which led to wide hips. They now walked to the other side of the room. Seeing the full extent of the cut of her dress, her entire back was bare. Frollo didn’t realize a woman’s back could look so attractive. The slit on the side exposed the top of her thighs as she walked and they fit the rest of her body. There wasn’t a single inch of her that wasn’t flawless. The Roman sculptors would fall to their knees and beg to capture her beauty if they saw her. 

His scotch was done in an instant. Not intending to sit before, he did so now, thankful that the bar acted as his cover for his leering and….the erection which was hard against his thigh. Thank the maker that he couldn’t get a tent in his suit trousers. He gasped softly, his heart racing. This woman took his breath away. “Hey, you, I haven’t seen you in awhile,” Delice sat at the bar stool next to him and he was so disoriented, he jumped out of his skin. “Jesus fuck,” he whispered and turned his eyes to look at her. She smiled prettily. Delice had a nice mouth and beautiful eyes. Instantly, they didn’t seem so impressive. “That’s a good introduction. Did I scare you?” she laughed. “Buy me a drink and make it up to me.” At this point he was going to need three drinks before the performance. He would use Delice as an excuse to do so. “Absolutely,” he said and ordered for them. He knew Delice’s drink of choice and he could feel Lucy’s eyes boring into the side of his face when he didn’t return after a few minutes. He couldn’t hear what Delice was talking about. He was thinking of the girl. He didn’t see her again… was she getting ready for the performance? “You men don’t even listen sometimes,” Delice sighed. Frollo was already on his third round of scotch in a matter of minutes. “I’ve had a rough day at work, I am sorry, Delice.” He was about to round up the tab when Delice ordered another drink and touched his hand with her fingers. He tensed. “I don’t think your P.A. likes me,” she wrinkled her nose and sneered. It was surprisingly attractive to look at. He hated that he still liked her. “Lucy?” he asked vacantly. “Who else?” she said irritably. “Do you have another one that acts like your mother?” If Frollo had been sober he would have been a lot more offended by what she said. “You’re not drunk already. Are you playing dumb? You aren’t usually this unattentive to me,” she pouted. His eyes dropped to her lips. Old habits. She was still tantalizing and she knew it.

Even when she wasn’t being nice to him, he never minded. He actually liked it and he understood why Lucy thought he had a problem and needed to keep his distance. “I’m sorry Delice, I am not myself today. I haven’t been feeling the greatest,” he lied easily and after paying for her drinks and another scotch, he walked back to his group. Lucy was glaring at him as if he had fornicated with Delice right there. “Why did you stay over there?” She asked in concern. “I saw you pay and drink like a fish.” Lucy wasn’t ever this uptight. Everything that was going on made Frollo incredibly anxious. He took another sip of scotch. He was a little drunk now. “Please, Lucy, I just need… a break for a minute.” Lucy frowned in confusion and nodded. “I am sorry sir,” she took his hand. “I am just trying to look out for you. She is bad news.” “I know,” he assured her. They sat down for the performance and his life would never be the same again. Looking at the playbill he casually skimmed through it, but his fingers trembled. Was she here? He blinked. Esmeralda Trouillefou. Making her professional debut. He could hear his pulse drummed in his ears. She was the ballerina they hired after Christine switched to vocals. This… this never would have happened to him if Erik hadn’t interfered. His blood ran cold. He could feel the voice of fate laughing softly in his ear. He was doomed. Watching her dance was agonizing. There wasn’t a single angle of her face or her body that showed an imperfection. Ballerina leotards were always an attractive item, but he had never seen a body like an hourglass in the corps before. Frollo’s blood rushed hotly through his veins and seared his flesh. A bead of sweat to trickle down the back of his neck. His eyes flew over her and only her. Her thick thighs… her thin arms-- her everything. Her massive hair was slick and perfectly contained in the usual dancer bun and her eye makeup was typical of dramatic theatre performances for ballerinas. Crossing his legs casually, he swore his erection never went down for the duration of the play. He felt heady and needed to calm his erratic breathing. He forced himself to stop watching at the end so he could become decent by the time the lights went up. They met that night and he was so unprepared to see her face to face that he came off cold and silent. She made a face of disapproval because of his lack of warmth and he felt his heart drop like a boulder in his gut because of the disappointment.What a great first impression. It wasn’t until later that he saw her parade herself like the perfect little trophy to every patron.It infuriated him so deeply that the next time they met, he insulted her without thinking of the consequences. Of course she would be a frivolous theatre whore! Why did he even think she might be sweet and mindful? Thank God Lucy wasn’t there that night, she would have given him a stern talking to. He began to envy Erik. At least Christine was approachable and modest, with a quiet intelligence that was beyond her years despite her fragility. Meanwhile, Claude was starved for a woman who flirted with the entire room like it was her job! Every man wanted a piece of her. He could see it in their eyes when they looked at her. He had never felt so much rage that his vision blurred. It happened. Cupid’s arrow pierced his heart. Just like Erik. Obsession gripped him like nothing else had before. He looked for news articles with her face and attended more performances. They were his sick pleasure in the beginning. She couldn’t even be compared to the ecstacy of a drug. She was his euphoria and he spent months in this crazed state where he would consume theatre performances like morphine. Scouring the papers that month, an introductory bio was published. He was mortified to find out that she had just turned twenty-two. He unconscionably memorized her birthday. At first, the fact that he didn’t care for her didn’t particularly interfere. It was lust that drove him and in his mind, the fascination would gradually wane. In a few months, he would wonder what was so special about her. For now, he wanted to drink every inch of her with his eyes when he could. It was then that he began taking Charlotte to and from her performances at least twice a week. Jean-Pierre appreciated the help and Claude couldn’t admit that it was for any other reason. Ah, but Esmeralda was vile! He hated everything about her! In the after parties, they kept their distance at first, but he always knew where she was socializing. She might as well crawl under the clothed tables with some of these men and service them right there! His fury and irritation soon became as intense as his desire. Any time they came near each other, they couldn’t be civil. Even her beautiful skin color became a matter of vexation. She wasn’t the typical ivory frenchwoman, but he saw her impress men that he knew for a fact were racist. There were a lot of french who disliked brown skin, Frollo being one of them. She challenged every perception he had of the world. “If you want to act like a theatre whore, at least try to be more subtle about it. You don’t see any of the others being so obvious. Have some dignity” He told her once away from everyone else when she demanded to know what his problem was. Of course she was highly offended and hurled plenty of fire back at him. By month two, Esmeralda was best friends with Charlotte and Charlotte asked him multiple times why he was so rude. No explanation could cover his behavior, so he blamed it on her being just as rude in the beginning. Charlotte was quick to defend Esmeralda. “Try to be nicer to her next time you see her or I will tell Papa to set you straight. You don’t know what she is like in private.” He remembered the day in the hospital when he waited for over eight hours for this girl to be born. The same girl, seventeen years later, was telling him to get his act together, lest she tell Jean-Pierre.  He clenched his jaw and agreed to be more civil. He didn’t want to have an embarrassing, personal conversation, which would most likely make him feel ashamed of himself.

His fixation for Esmeralda never went anywhere like he anticipated, only increased as they both seemed to call a quiet truce. At least, when they had to make appearances. “Coquette,” he sneered under his breath in passing and she almost smiled. “Cad,” she cooed, unaffected. It burned his heart, especially when she found out she could ruffle his feathers by being a mixture of flirty and argumentative with him. She loved to flirt! When she flirted with him, it was a particular kind of teasing that set his skin aflame in concealed excitement, but it enraged him the most. It wasn’t real. It was mockery. Another month went by and things were becoming more difficult. He didn’t realize how close Christine and Esmeralda had become. Soon, the situation turned on its head and everyone but him completely adored her. “She is so great, I don’t understand why you are so mean to her,” Charlotte whined on the way home from a performance. She brought this up a lot and Frollo was growing tired of hearing it. “She isn’t particularly kind to me either,” Frollo said irritably. “So you both have a temper, I’m sure you two can start over. I’ve never seen either of you act like this. It just proves to show that you two got off on the wrong foot. I know you guys are very different.” “That is quite an understatement,” Frollo muttered through his teeth. It was month three since he saw Esmeralda for the first time and Erik was becoming more insistent that they meet. Claude avoided this moment for as long as possible. Erik knew everything that went on in the theatre and he was not ready to have a conversation about Esmeralda, or really any of his behavior when interacting with her. But soon, Erik put a hand on Frollo’s back as one of the performances ended. He hadn’t even seen where the man came from, as if he had teleported. Erik led him to a discreet area in the theatre which required his handprint for clearance. It wasn’t like Claude could run away. “I already told Charlotte that I would be speaking with you and her dad will be picking her up.” Frollo’s lips pulled in discomfort instead of the friendly smile he had aimed for. Once inside, they talked about Christine and her progress mostly. Frollo thought he might be off the hook, but he had been too hopeful.It was Erik’s turn to ask questions that he didn’t mean. “How about you, old friend? Have you found someone you are interested in?” Frollo’s skin prickled with anxiety. “No. I think I would tell you at this point if there was,” Frollo scoffed. The smile Erik gave was chilling and all knowing. His anxiety went off the charts. He felt like Erik was giving him a lie detector test where he already knew the results. “I don’t think you would.” Fear spread throughout Claude’s body and his stomach twisted with nauseum. “It’s Esmeralda, isn’t it?” The judge couldn’t hide completely from his reaction. His lips parted in surprise. Erik was the first one to suspect anything was amiss. “Don’t be ridiculous,” Frollo’s voice was tight in his throat. “You are the one who has been acting ridiculous!” “And you haven’t?” Frollo said defensively. “Don’t think I forgot you went off the rails because I spoke to Christine. Esmeralda irritates me, nothing more.” Erik laughed. He laughed! “You are obsessed! Ah, my friend has the same ailment as me!” Claude’s face turned white as a sheet. “Obsession will never be love, Erik,” he spat. It fell from his mouth and the opera ghost had never looked so smug. “So you admit it, then…And I disagree,” Erik waved his hand in an elegant dismissal.“My obsession has certainly blossomed and I can now say that I am in love. I would make the world spin the opposite direction. Christine must only ask it of me.” Frollo looked away and took a sip of his wine to refrain from sneering at the emotional soliloquy.That sentence seemed to be more for himself than for Claude’s regard.The thought of romantic love was beginning to repulse him more and more with each breath he took. “Your obsession might have turned into love for Christine, but that is not to be my fate.This is just an odd phase in my life. Us old men know how that happens. It will pass and I will forget it ever happened.” It would take Claude months for him to see just how little progress Erik was making with Christine. “That is not how hell works.”   Erik became so sombre that the hopelessness seemed to overtake the room. Erik’s words were cryptic and they lingered in Claude’s head hours after he left. He would wear the obsession thin. If he was this fed up with Esmeralda now, his irritation would eventually make him sick of her. It had to. Month four approached.Though it was still his secret pleasure to watch her dance because it excited him to his core, he was beginning to feel less satisfied. It gave him hope that his obsession was finally waning. It was a false flag. Ever since things had reached a temporary calm, his feelings for Esmeralda were merely shifting without him realizing it. He attended the theatre less this month and most of his interactions with the ballerina were picking up Charlotte from rehearsals or performances. Jean-Pierre was having health troubles and since “Claude turned into such a theatre buff this year,” he asked him to continue helping him with Charlotte. Frollo didn’t tell him that he hadn’t been going much lately, especially when his father-figure looked so pale and uncomfortable. None of them wanted Charlotte to be taking public transport by herself and Claude was the only one without kids. “Of course I will help,” Frollo assured him. It was devastating for him, especially when he wanted to avoid the theatre entirely. Sometimes mid-day rehearsals ran long, sometimes they were short. Frollo was always punctual, so it seemed like more than half of the time, he was in an empty theatre sitting with a handful of others waiting for the rehearsal to be over. He observed Esmeralda, who always sat next to Charlotte on the floor when Madame Giry did her review at the end of each rehearsal. He noticed how sweet her face was despite Charlotte’s constant pestering. More than once, Madame Giry had to tell Charlotte to be quiet. There was never a moment when Esmeralda regarded Charlotte with irritation, which was more than what he could say about himself. He admired her gentle smiles. He had never seen them before. These were the private smiles she gave to friends and not to patrons. Frollo got into the habit of taking xanax much more frequently. Theatre parties were one thing because he could hide in a crowd. Picking up Charlotte when she was always hanging on Esmeralda’s arm was a more intimate experience. One night, the rehearsal ran exceedingly late.There would be a new open soon and Madame Giry wasn’t having it. He was waiting for about two hours for it to be finished.. Once it was, he silently thanked a God he didn’t believe in. It was the first time he saw Esmeralda dance in a few weeks and he was yet again surprised by how acutely she affected him. His skin was warm. Distance wasn’t enough. Charlotte emerged in her regular clothes, approaching with Esmeralda. He couldn’t help but feel tense. Normally, she avoided him. He frowned naturally and saw her look away, slightly miffed, which in turn annoyed him even more. “Uncle Claude, would you mind giving Esmeralda a ride home tonight? It is dark and Christine didn’t have rehearsal today, so there would be no buddy system.” Frollo couldn’t help his sigh of annoyance. This was not at all how he planned on spending his evening. “It’s ok Charlotte, he obviously doesn’t want to,” Esmeralda said in a gentle tone he had personally never heard her use. He had never been subjected to a teenage girl’s pointed irritation before. It was like daggers. “Uncle Claude, I swear--” “Alright.” Frollo put his hands up in defeat. He didn’t want Charlotte to finish that sentence. Charlotte’s excitement was childlike. It was apparent to him that she adored Esmeralda with every fiber of her being. Staying separated from them as they walked to his expensive car, they hopped in the back. Fate was having a hell of a time making him miserable, as there was an accident which caused the traffic to be more congested than usual. There was no taking an alternate route. Charlotte talked excessively. Looking in the overhead mirror, he could see Esmeralda up close with natural makeup and normal clothes. She was honestly more stunning now. She smiled at Charlotte again and his heart twisted. She was so exquisite... Another emotion came over him that he had never felt. Then, his heart began to beat faster. Tender feelings flooded his chest and suddenly he yearned for her to smile at him. His eyes darted back to the road. No… no he couldn’t. This was the fascination talking to him. He didn’t care what happened to her or what she wanted. The night would never end and when they finally reached Esmeralda’s apartment, relief swept over him. “Thank you for the ride, Minister,” Esmeralda said. Their eyes met and he wondered if this was the first time that they looked at each other without animosity. “You are welcome.” His voice was reluctant, but Esmeralda seemed oddly pleased. So, he could be civil for literally half a second. She flashed the smallest of smiles as she left. It wasn’t the large, carefree ones that she gave to others, but it still caused his heart to skip a beat in his chest. “See, that didn’t kill you!” Charlotte said loudly. Claude sat there for a moment. “I think it may have,” he said quietly and Charlotte thought he was joking. “Sure, Uncle Claude. Whatever.”