#if max was a real man he would let that face win a race

[ariesrain]

life is a photoshoot for him

[menagerofmischief]

Nugget Update (MV1)

sumary: y/n's always giddy after getting a nugget update, sure she loves her best boy, but it also has something to do with the cat sitter sending the updates

driver!reader x cat sitter!max verstappen -> habs incoming... series masterlist

cw: not fia approved words, a bit of lance hate (I don't actually hate him), mutual pinning, the grid teasing the reader, lot of appearances from the reader's cat, kissing, kinda mean!reader (to the grid)

wc: 4.1k

a/n: this is my first time writing in 2nd person so bear with me. also, I low key hate this and it may be shit. not proof read!

“Well aren’t you a ball of sunshine?” A voice called out, disturbing the peace - or the closest thing to peace you could have near a Formula 1 track.

Your gaze snapped up, eyes narrowing as you took in the man standing on the entry of the RedBull garage. “Hello, Charles,” you replied, a teasing bite obviously heard in your voice as you crossed your arms over your chest. “I know you wanted to experience what a successful garage looks like but I thought Ferrari had a better hold on you.”

Charles laughs, his eyes crinkling as his lips stretch into a smile. Teasing Charles was always a fun time but that’s all it was, just a bit of fun. It never stretched into something meaner, just two people showing affection by teasing each other.

Charles had been your very first real friend on the grid. The first to offer his hand with a smile and genuinely mean it. The first to congratulate you on a win after getting out of the car or the first to say that the next race would be better. Really, he was your best friend, but you would never tell him that or it would go to his head.

“Funny, very funny.” He said, his accent thick. His eyes slid around the motor home until finally meeting your own. “Lot of drivers are going out for drinks, came by to invite you.”

“I don’t Charles,” you started to say, going through your mental list of excuses, searching for the best one to use to avoid this social interaction.

“Oh come on!” He whined, rolling his eyes. He gave you a look that let you know you could stop thinking about an excuse because he wasn’t going to be buying it. “We won’t stay that long and it’s night race tomorrow so you don’t need to wake up at the crack of dawn.”

You pressed your lips together, the lip gloss previously applied making them slide against each other easily. 

Charles kissed his teeth, nodding his head along. Fine, he’ll play the game. “Some of the WAG’s are coming as well.”

“Are you really trying to lure me out by promising female company?”

“Is it working?”

“Eh,” you shrugged your shoulders. “Will you pay my tab?”

Charles scoffed. “Pay your tab?” He asked, sounding as if you had asked him for his firstborn. “You’re filthy rich! You have a bigger salary than me!”

“Yeah, they do pay world champions a bit extra, comes with the title.” You replied, grinning at him, a wide teasing grin, your eyes twinkling. 

“Fine whatever, I’ll pay your tab.” He said, raising his hands in surrender. “Now go take that suit off and shower, you look disgusting.”

“You look like a trash can threw you up!”

“It threw me up because it saw you!” Charles shouted back in response, his back already turned to you as he walked away, back to the Ferrari garage. 

And that’s how you ended up in the bar, an hour later. Squished in the not too comfortable and definitely not meant to sit so many people, booth. With George’s girlfriend Carmen on your left, and Pierre’s girlfriend Kika on your right, and deep in conversation with both of them. 

You feel your phone vibrate under your hand on the table, and the screen lights up, showing off your wallpaper, a picture of your beloved cat Nugget.

You tune off from the conversation the moment the message arrives, grabbing your phone and pulling it in towards you. Your face lights up, lips stretching into a smile as your eyes focus on the sender ID. Maxie.

Or rather Max. The very cute guy who was your cat sitter whenever you were out and about in the world, chasing the racing track. 

With a quick move of your fingers, you swipe up, opening your phone and going into the message app. Fingers quickly tapping along the screen of your phone as you type out your reply.

With a smile you closed the messages app, pressing your fingers against the button on the side of your phone, watching the screen go black before setting it face down onto the table. As you looked back up, Lando’s amused yet teasing expression caught your eye.

You leaned forward against the table, pressing your hands to the wooden surface as you attempted to get a bit closer to the driver on the other side of the table. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Oh nothing,” he said with a laugh. “Just wondering who you’re texting, that’s all.” He intertwined his fingers, elbows pressed against the table and leaned forward as well. “You were all grumpy cat but then you get a message and suddenly you’re all smiles.”

“Grumpy cat?” You scoff, rolling your eyes at the McLaren driver. “I’m not a grumpy cat. And for the record, that was Nugget’s babysitter and he was sending me a picture of Nugget.”

Lando laughs, there’s a twinkle in his eyes that tells you he wants to say more but he holds himself back. “Can I see? I haven’t seen the orange gremlin in so long.”

“That’s very mean,” you say, opening your phone to show him the picture, that Max had sent you. “Nugget would never say that about you.”

“That’s because Nugget can’t speak.” He looks at the screen and his lips twist upward in a smirk. “Who’s Maxie?”

You breathe out through your nose, teeth digging into your bottom lip. When you speak your voice is sharp, it leaves no room for questioning things or an invite to ask more questions. “The cat sitter.”

“I’m sure that’s all he is.” Lando laughs when you show him your middle finger before settling back into your seat and returning to the previously abandoned conversation with the two WAG’s.

The race went pretty smoothly, as always. Starting from pole, keeping the lead the whole race and with a 20s gap to car in P2. Everything after that was pretty much a blur, the interviews, partying through the night with the grid and boarding the jet early in the morning.

The sun already started setting by the time you made it to Monaco. With a sigh you rummaged through your bag, blindly feeling around the stuff inside before your fingers finally wrapped around the keys.

Opening the apartment door you walked inside, gently laying down your suitcase as your eyes settled on the scene in your living room. Right there, laying on your couch, in deep sleep, and cuddling your cat is Max Verstappen. 

His hair had fallen over his eyes and the position he’s in looks rather uncomfortable, you’re sure his body will be aching when he wakes up. His chest was raising and falling with each breath he took, little sighs slipping past his lips. Nugget was cuddled up to him, curled in a ball.

You looked at him for a few moments before starting to move around as quietly as possible, not wanting to wake him up. 

Max had been cat sitting for you for a while now. Half of last season and now half of this one so almost a year. He was a sweet, kinda shy, mostly nerdy guy you ran into in a coffee shop and spilled his coffee. You offered to buy him a new one and he joined you for the coffee and you got to talking when he said he was looking for a job so you offered him to become your pet sitter.

At that point you really did need someone to look after your cat while you were gone, since you had broken up with your ex who usually took care of Nugget while you were away. And you couldn’t leave Nugget with your parents since your father was allergic to cats.

Now, your best friend who had been working in a different country had returned to Monaco and said she’d be more than happy to look after Nugget - but you wanted to keep Max around. 

Already having grown used to coming home after a race weekend to find him there, just existing in your space.

Nugget’s whiskers twitch, his eyes opening and he pulls himself away from Max, stretches out and then trots over to you, rubbing his head against your leg affectionately while purring. He let out a happy, albeit a bit too loud, meow when you picked him up and on the other side of the room Max began stirring from his sleep.

He opened his eyes, a bit confused, and rubbed his knuckles against his eyes to wake up, blinking a few times as his eyes adjusted to the light filling up the room. 

“You’re back,” he says, his voice is gentle, still sleepy and a bit quiet. His eyes meet yours and he offers you a sweet smile that has you immediately smiling back at him. “Didn’t mean to fall asleep, sorry about that.”

“Oh no, it’s no problem,” you reply, running your hand over Nugget’s fur as the cat lay happily in your arms. “You can use the guest bedroom if you’re tired, you know. The couch may be expensive but that doesn’t mean it’s comfortable for sleep.”

“I didn’t want to overstep,” Max said, pulling himself up into a sitting position. You approached the couch and sat down, the cat nestling in your lap and purring in content. Max smiled, reaching out his hand and petting Nugget.

“Nonsense Max, you’re not overstepping.” You cut him off, leaving no room for argument. You always told him to feel at ease in your apartment, that he was welcome to any food in the fridge and free to use the guest room as he pleased but even after all this time there was still a slight air of awkwardness backed up by the fear of going a bit too far.

Max’s eyes settled on you, your own focused on your cat so you didn’t notice him looking. He watched the way you cooed at Nugget, asking if he was a good boy while you were away and petting him gently, and his lips stretched into a small, careful smile.

He spoke before thinking. The words left his mouth before he even finished the thought inside of his head. “I watched the race,” he said, and your eyes instantly snapped up to meet his. He swallowed, already too deep to back down. “It - “ he licked his lips, trying to decide his next words, feeling like his tongue had tied itself up in a knot. “You were spectacular. It was lovely … simply lovely.”

You let out a breath, the corners of your mouth twisting upwards and you gave him a thankful look. Max swore he could feel his heart beating in his throat, and felt his cheeks heat up. “Thank you,” you said, your voice gentle, holding a comforting tone. “I’m glad you enjoyed it. And it’s nice - knowing you watched.”

“It is?”

You bit your lip, teeth scraping against you bottom lip as you looked at him, your brain running faster than the Sauber (like it’s hard) as you tried to come up with a response. “It’s kind of comforting,” you finally said, after what felt like a small forever.

You hummed, looking down at your nails. “I was thinking about bringing Nugget with me to the next race. It’s been a while since he was in the paddock.”

“Oh,” Max said, an edge of confusion noticeable in the tone of his voice. “Does that mean that you don’t need me coming over next week?”

“Actually, I was hoping you would come with.” You say, before you can talk yourself out of making the proposition.

Max tilts his head to the side, kind of like a confused cat and you try your best not to giggle at the mental image. “I’m not sure I’m following.”

“If you wanted to attend the Grand Prix,” you tell him, running the edge of one of your nails along your skin. “Cuz’ I’m still gonna need someone to look after Nugget, and you do that in general so this would just be an added bonus of traveling.”

Max is silent for a few moments and you think he’ll decline. You wouldn't fully blame him if he did, you know what the pressure of the paddock can be like. You’re about to open your mouth, tell him that ‘never mind, it was a stupid idea anyway’ and put him out of the trouble of finding a polite way to decline when he finally speaks. 

“I suppose, if you want me to then yeah, I’ll come along to watch Nugget.” He says, trying to ignore the nervous feeling building up in his chest when you smile at him, a wide happy smile that makes him instantly smile back.

“Great!” You said, the excitement evident in your voice. “Someone from the team will contact you in a while to arrange the tickets and leave the rest to me.” Max nods, he doesn’t trust himself to speak, not with the way his throat is closing up and it makes him feel like he can’t breathe.

“Look at you all giggly,” Charles teased, gently pushing your shoulder with his hand. He wiggled his eyebrows, a laugh slipping past his lips as you glared at him.

“Charles, why don’t you turn around and flash your pretty face to the crowd.” You said, rolling your eyes. You looked at the stadium full of people who were shouting out for their favorite drivers, waving banners and cheering happily. You smiled towards the stadium and lifted your hand up, waving your fingers to the public. “Give them a wave.”

“See, I always knew you thought I was pretty,” Charles replied, waving at the public. The two of you and the rest of the grid were in a wagon, going around the track for the drivers parade, so essentially you were stuck with him for at least five more minutes. “Now, do tell who’s got you smiling like that.”

“Is it Maxie?” Lando asked, the teasing tone evident in his voice. He pushed himself closer to you and Charles, inserting himself into the conversation. 

“Didn’t your mom teach you not to eavesdrop?” 

“No, no!” Charles said, shaking his head as he waved his hand dismissively as you, his full attention now focused on Lando. “Who’s Maxie?”

Lando smiled at him, his eyes sparkling with mischief. “The cat sitter,” he said in a sing-song kind of voice. 

“The one you brought to your garage?” The Ferrari driver asked, his attention back on you. “The pretty one.”

“Hold up!” Lando almost shouted, raising his hands. “You brought him with you to the Grand Prix?!”

“I didn’t … well I did bring him.” You said with a sigh, there was no escaping this now. “But it’s not like that. He’s here to watch Nugget.”

“And for you to watch him - because boy that is one good arm candy.”

“Charles, your homosexual is showing,” you warned.

“But you’re not denying it,” Charles noted, giving you a smirk.

You rolled your eyes at him but finally gave in. “Yes, I’m not denying it.”

You stepped back into the motor home, your eyes immediately searching for Max and finally you found him talking to your lead engineer. As you approached the two you could start to hear their conversation and quickly realized they were talking about how the car worked and what went on behind the scenes at a Grand Prix. You found it cute that Max was interested in that.

His eyes met yours and his face lit up, the corners of his mouth twisting upwards into a smile. “You’re back!” He said, “After terrorizing everyone around and getting pets, Nugget decided to settle down for a nap. He’s in your driver's room.”

Max gave you a wink after saying that and you had to hold in a giggle. You excused yourself to go to your driver’s room, with Max following behind you. The first thing you noticed when you went inside was Nugget, curled up on the massage bed and sleeping without a care.

The next thing that grabbed your attention was a dozen pastries lined up on a small table next to the couch. They were all individually wrapped in tissues.

“Max,” you said, picking up one of the pastries and unwrapping it. “I really did mean only one pastry, you know?” You bit into the chocolate filled pastry, moaning at the taste of a treat you weren’t usually allowed to have when it was race week. “My trainer will strangle me if he sees.”

“I swear, no one saw anything.” Max said, shuffling over to the couch and sitting down. “I was sneakier than Nugget when he’s stealing my food.”

“Oh, now that’s a very serious claim.” You told him with a laugh, his own laugh echoing back. You picked up one of the wrapped pastries and offered it to him. “Take one, or five. There’s no way I’m eating it all.”

He takes the pastry you’re offering him, his fingers brushing against your own as he takes it from your hand, sending sparks of electricity down your spine. After a second of hesitation you sit down next to him, the two of you eating the treats in comfortable silence.

His thigh nudges against yours and you turn to face him, finding that he’s already looking at you. He smiles and you don’t hesitate to smile back.

The practices go great, P2 in FP1, P1 in FP2 and P1 in FP3. 

The qualifying is where a slight setback shows up, with quali being ended early due to a crash and a red flag, putting you in P10 for the start of the race tomorrow.  

Once the car had rolled back into the pits you wasted no time getting out, putting the steering wheel back into place before storming into your driver’s room. 

You pulled your helmet off, fingers curling into the bottom of your balaclava as you pulled it off, throwing it next to your helmet before bringing your hands up to smooth down your hair. 

“I’m not in the fucking mood, Pepe.” You said without turning around, assuming it was your race engineer coming to talk about the outcome of qualifying. “Fucking Lance and his fucking money made seat - if that little frog screws up another quali, I’ll be the one crashing him out.”

“I’m not Pepe,” the other person in the room says and you instantly turn around, your eyes wide as they meet Max’s blue ones. “And I’m certainly glad I’m not Lance.”

You looked him up and down, eyes trailing over his figure. You took notice of Nugged, cuddled up in his arms and looked at you curiously, and reached your hand out to pet the cat, a long breath slipping past your lips. 

“Sorry,” you said with a shrug of your shoulders. “I didn’t really mean for you to hear that.”

Max barely heard what you were saying. Too distracted by the sight of you for his brain to properly register your words. Your skin was slightly glistening with sweat, an imprint from where your helmet and balaclava had dug into your skin still visible on your flushed cheeks. Your messy hair, and your chest raising and falling with each breath you took as you were still working on catching up your breath.

Max blinked, finally snapping out of his thoughts and focusing his attention back to what you were saying. “They should have let you finish the lap.” 

“I agree but sadly that’s not how it works.”

Max nodded along, not really knowing what to say to that so he switched to the next topic. “I ran into your friend. He invited you, and me, out for drinks. I think it would be nice to go, you seem like you need a drink.”

“Yeah, I definitely do.” You replied, taking Nugget from his arms and into your own, stroking down the cat’s body. “Which friend?”

“Uh,” Max started, thinking of a way to describe the guy since he couldn’t remember his name. “Wears red, pretty, sounds French.”

You laughed, smiling at him. “That’s Charles. I hope you didn’t tell him he sounds French, he gets offended by that.”

“Then it’s great I kept it to myself.”

You laughed in reply, putting Nugget down to the floor, the cat immediately moving to a cozy corner and curling up into a ball on the floor, shutting his eyes. “The hotel is right next to the track, you can take Nugget back while I shower and then we can go - if you want to.”

“Sounds like a deal,” Max replied with a smile.

You showered and put on a clean set of clothes just in time to meet Max after he finished dropping Nugget back to the hotel, leaving him with toys, food and water. The two of you made your way to the bar to join the rest of the grid for a night out. 

Some of the drivers were playing pool while their girlfriends were engrossed in a conversation so that left you and Max sitting together, sharing drinks and talking.

“I just …” you started, cracking your fingers. “I don’t know, this quali really messed up my mood and I was riding on such a high after the practices going well. It all feels shit now.”

“Maybe you just need more motivation for the race.” Max offered, drinking the rest of the liquor from his glass in one go. 

“You have something in mind, Maxie?” You asked, the nickname slipping past your lips without a thought now that you’ve had a few drinks. 

“How about a kiss if you get on the podium?” He said, his voice suggestive. Normally he never would have dared to say something like that but the alcohol courage really worked wonders. 

Your eyes widened, clearly not expecting him to be so bold or to suggest that. He took your reaction as a bad sign, immediately straightening up as a wave of dread quickly sobered him up.

“I’m sorry,” he gasped out, the expression on his face shifting into a panicked one. “That was stupid. It was thoughtless. It was -”

“A great motivation,” you cut him off, putting a finger up against his lips to silence him. “It was a great motivation.”

His cheeks burned as his eyes met yours. He looked so vulnerable, his bright eyes impossibly wide. “Yeah?”

“Yeah!”

“One more corner to go but you’re in the clear,” Pepe’s voice echoed over the radio. You blinked, your eyes focused on the track before you, the checkered flag already visible along with your team gathering in the front. “That’s P1, Y/n. Phenomenal drive today, you deserved it!”

“Thank you,” you said, your voice breathless as you moved your hands, going through the last corner and speeding towards the finish line. “Thank you, Pepe.” You repeated, swallowing your spit. “It was lovely, simply lovely.”

You put the car into P1, getting out and posing for a picture on top of your car. You could hear the shouts, the cheers, the celebration. You took off your helmet, ripping off your balaclava and putting them both into the car before turning around to face the team, eyes searching for a particular face. 

Finally, you spotted Max. Standing besides your engineer, a proud expression on his face as he looked at you with a wide smile. You didn’t hesitate, feet moving before you could think and then you were in front of him, grabbing his shirt and pulling him down, smashing your lips into his.

The kiss was desperate, both of having waited long enough for it. He wrapped his arms around you, the best he could with the fence between you, kissing you back with need. 

You finally pulled away when you felt your lungs burning from the lack of oxygen, learning your forehead against his. Nothing else mattered, not the public, not the team, not the celebration. Only him, finally yours.

“Simply lovely, right?” You asked, your voice breathless.

“Simply lovely!” Max repeated back to you, before kissing you once again. And he really did mean it - everything was simply lovely.

tag list: @formula1-motogpfan @misty-inferno @thelemonque3n @marvel-hotchner @strangemaximoff @folkloresreputation @pippyth3hippy @adharacambridge @theseerbetweenus @sebastianstansblog @tellybearryyyy @six-call @grussellsprout @oikarma @justcharlotte @annimausi

i hope i tagged everyone who said they wanted to be on the tag list. hope you enjoyed this one and keep an eye out for the poll about the next part of the series <3

[gguk-n]

Chapter 3- The Reveal

Unravelling Max's Mystery (Max Verstappen x Online Friend!Reader)

Series Masterlist

Summary- Y/N gets rejected for the sixth time. Max win's the Monaco grand prix 2023. Y/N decides she needs time for herself.

No hate to anyone, it's for the story

{Reader's POV}

I fell asleep crying, a faint buzzing from my phone was heard from the other room. I woke up after a few hours at 3 am when I found my phone which was burning up. The messages hadn't stop coming. They had gotten quite frantic as I scrolled through my notifications. I decided to reply to Max's messages.

He was still the guy I liked, I couldn't not reply. But I was hurt and in no shape to be talking to him. I don't know what Max said after my message because my phone shut down. I pushed myself to clean myself up and my surrounding. I was a stress cleaner and I'm so grateful to having 2 jobs right now. It meant my mind would be preoccupied. I cleaned my whole house before leaving for school in the morning. My eyes were red and puffy; I was on coffee. I had yet to switch my phone on. I wasn't ready to face Max yet.

Today was the worst day, not only because of last night's revelation but I had the least amount of classes today. None of the kids needed help after class either. That meant I was left to my own devices. When I switched the phone on, I could see missed calls and texts from Max and a couple voice messages; from the night before and today morning I guess. I opened up Google to check his schedule; he was in Monaco, which was also his home currently. I found out a lot about him, you think you know someone but then Google tells you otherwise. His dad was as shitty as he described. His records and feats were astonishing and if I wasn't this angry at him for hiding it from me, I would've been so proud and told him so. His Instagram feed was pretty and polished and he posted so much racing content. I found his streaming account with a team, he was exactly like the Max that called me everyday with occasional appearances from the cats on stream. People spoke so rudely about Max, it angered me to no end. He was a kind man, a liar but a sweet man.

The real kicker was Max's girlfriend's account where I found so many pictures of them together with her daughter, from what I found out. He looked happy, he had a family like he always said he wanted. I couldn't help but smile bitterly, a part of me wished that it was me who was the woman beside him with our kid. Life is cruel in some ways, mine is satire at best. Here, I can't date a man because I'm hung up on a guy I've never met before while said man has a family. I felt tears streaming down my face which I quickly wiped them off. I had enough of pity and sympathy stares since the morning to last a lifetime, I can't deal with any more of them.

I knew I wanted to talk to Max, the only guy who has ever understood me, however, I also knew that if we spoke I wouldn't be listening to him. I was scared I would lose the one true friend I have. Would Max understand where I was coming from? Why did he hide this from me? Did he not trust me enough? I get it, but you are a public figure. I don't know how to feel about all of this. It was the weekend tomorrow. I would be left with my thoughts and I probably shouldn't confront Max before his race on Sunday, right?

I spent the next two days planning how I would talk to Max. How I would ask him why he hid everything from me? I didn't want to fight him; my parents always said I was rude and difficult to work with, that my anger consumed me, that my words were harsh. I wasn't supposed to show such negative emotions they said. I didn't want to lose him; but was I allowed to hold on to him when he never let me have him?

Max called and texted me every day but I was very scared, scared of becoming the monster my parents said I was, sacred of hurting the one I love. There I said it, said Max and love in the same sentence. I had threaded that line so carefully but after all of this, I realised that I've loved him for years and watching him be happy with some else hurt as much as knowing that I never truly knew Max. It was Sunday night, I checked the news and saw that Max won. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to rejoice watching the man I love win at what he was best at or be hurt watching him live a life I knew nothing about.

I texted him at night on Sunday, maybe he would be busy celebrating his win, I didn't know. I didn't know a lot of things. As I waited for the text back, I logged on to my emails that I had forgotten about to find a reply from the publication I had sent my work to; to be met with dismay. Another rejection, I'm not sure how many more rejections I could take. My hands shook, making the laptop fall from my lap onto the bed. I got up and got myself a glass of water.

I laid on my bed for god knows how long before the familiar ring of my phone pulled me out of my trance. I had taken the day off tomorrow. I knew I didn't have the mental or emotional capacity to deal with anything. I answered the call to a worried Max.

Max- Schat, how have you been? Haven't heard a word from you in days. Y/N- I've been busy, school year ending and stuff. Why didn't you sleep yet? Max- You know my sleep schedule is non existent. Y/N- Yeah, I guess I do. Max looked at me confused. Y/N- You know how I do freelance editing Max- You've told me about it Y/N- The latest author I'm working with is a sports author. I was hoping you could help me since you are a walking encycylopedia. Max- sure schat, but what's up with you? You know I'm always there for you Y/N- Yeah it nothing, just stressed. Max- Take off, you deserve it Y/N- The summer break is here soon, I'll be fine. So about that author... Max-Yeah, what sport does she write for? Y/N- Formula One. I don't really like reading lengthy articles and I'm sure one article wouldn't do a sport any justice. I could see the colour leave Max's face. He licked his lips before speaking. Max- You did not go through google yet, right? Y/N- Oh no, what do you take me for? I got excited to learn about something new. Do you know who the reigning champion is? Max was quite, a sort of uncomfortable silence had enveloped us, for the first time in 10 years. Y/N- Some dude named Max Verstappen. You guys share the same first name. He has 2 cats too; named Jimmy and Sassy, who look exactly like your bengals. I mean he even looks like you, with horrible sleep schedule just like you. He even sounds like you. I felt my voice begin to crack while I spoke, the lump in my throat unbearably big, my breathing was uneven. Max- Schatje, I can explain. Y/N- You don't have to Max. I never asked you what you did. You don't have to explain anything. (I smiled with only my lips) Max- I wanted to tell you, it just never came up in conversation. Y/N- I get it, it's difficult to tell your friend who has amounted to nothing that you are the World Driver's Champion, best of the best in Formula One. Max- Y/N, it's nothing like that. You're great, you're kind, you're funny. I laughed bitterly. Y/N- Those are character traits I possess, they don't describe my career goals or achievements. I know I work 2 jobs to stay afloat while you make millions, I know I wish I was an author and not their editor, I know you probably thought I was too stupid to understand your rich and fancy world. Max- No, no, you're so talented. I've read your work and I'm sure the right publication will pick your work up. Y/N- I got rejected for the sixth time today. All of this is fine except that you lied to me about being single while having a girlfriend for years and having the happy family you dreamt off. You didn't have to introduce me to her; not like my boyfriends met you. But it would've been nice if I knew. Max- It just never came up. Y/N- I...we joked about setting you up with someone all the time. Please don't. I get it, we didn't tell each other about work goals or what we did as a job but personal life; I literally told you about every guy I've ever been with. I felt bad telling you thinking you were single. I feel stupid right now. I had tears streaming down my face at this point. Max- I'm sorry,Y/N. I promise I won't hide anything anymore. Please, don't cry. Y/N- My name is Y/N Y/L/N. I majored in literature in Uni and now work as a primary school teacher and freelance editor. I'm trying to get my book published soon. I broke up with my boyfriend 2 months ago. Max- Please don't do this. Y/N- I believe at least one of us should be honest. Max- Let me fix this. Y/N- Don't worry. There's nothing to fix. (I wiped away my tears) Max- Please don't say that. You mean a lot me. Y/N- Me too. That's why, I need time. I'll talk to you when I'm ready. Max- Please, I can't lose you. Y/N- You won't. I'll always be there for you. I just need time. Take care Max I saw tears streaming down Max's face. Max- Bye, take care Y/N. I'll always be here. And then the screen went black.

[Max spent the whole week worrying about Y/N. He couldn't think straight. This was weird, she was never this busy before. It was stressing him out, he couldn't eat or sleep. He never even thought about the fact that maybe his lie had been exposed. When Y/N texted him, he was at a club in Monaco with the other drivers to celebrate his win. He only saw it after he got back home and immediately called her. She looked different, there was this sadness in her eyes. The smile didn't reach her eyes. And then she started talking, his heart was beating very fast. The moment she said Formula One, his whole world came crashing down. The more she spoke the more he felt like he was falling deeper, in a pit of his own making. He wanted to tell her, he wanted to explain himself but no words left his mouth. Then she started talking about his girlfriend. He felt like this was the last time he would get to talk to her, the last time he would hear her voice. This felt like the last time he would have her]

[forensicheart]

Age Is Just A Number

Fernando Alonso x Reader

Summary: You like Fernando but it takes a bit of convincing for you to admit it.

Warning: Dirty talk, fingering, p in v, edging , age gap (reader 21, Fernando 42)

You couldn't help as your gaze stopped on the flash of green you spotted as your eyes scanned the paddock. You were making your way down the pitlane to see your brother but instead you found yourself drifting towards the Aston Martin garage.

"Hermosa!" A voice shouted as you entered the garage, your figure always catching the eyes of the older man. He made a beeline for you as he excused himself from his strategist wrapping his arms around you and he hugged you gently. As he pulled away from you, you didn't miss the way his eyes dragged up and down your body.

"You look as gorgeous as always" You turned your head away trying to hide the blush as you saw Fernando smirk out of the corner of your eye. Before you could open your mouth to reply Fernando seemed to have more on his mind.

"I'm sure this dress would look even better on my floor though" He ended with a wink and turned to walk further into garage as his name was called. Once more you were left blushing and as you continued down the pitlane you couldn't help but think about Fernando. The way his accented words sent shivers down your spine, the way his sat that made you want to run your heads through it, how his confidence never strayed despite the clear gap in your age. That was the main reason you never pursued Fernando's obvious advances, the age gap. 21 years. Fernando never held back with his flirting, everyone knew that he was into you but you on the other hand had never admitted to feeling the same.

"Who's got you blushing?" Max's voice interrupted your thoughts, you hadn't realised that you'd even made it to the garage, let alone bump into your brother.

"Oh, uh, just a bit hot is all" You tried to lie smoothly but Max had always been able to see right through you, especially with the upscaling of Fernando's flirting recently, not even attempting to hide it from your brother.

"You've been at the Aston Martin garage haven't you?" You sigh knowing you won't be able to lie your way out of it.

"Yes, but I didn't initiate anything Max, I was barely even there for a minute" Max imitated your sigh from a moment ago shaking his head.

"He's far too old for you Y/n”

“I know, I know Max, I’ll stay away from him more” You said accepting defeat as you made your way further into the RedBull garage to find a spot to watch the race from.

-

With Max winning per usual you made your leave early without him knowing you’d see him after all the media and presentations were done. On your way out though you were stopped by a certain older man who called out your name as you made your way to your car. Max’s words circled in your mind as you kept walking deciding to ignore the man behind you but he wasn’t giving up. Running up to you he placed his hand on your shoulder as he stood walking next to you.

“Are you ignoring me now hermosa?”

"Simply brothers orders Alonso" Fernando lets out a laugh and you know he doesn't believe you.

"I think you just don't want to admit that you've fallen for an older man" You scoff and brush off the hand still resting on your shoulder as you both come to a stop.

"I do not like you Fernando. So please, just give up" Your words only draw the man closer to you, seeming to tower over you as a hand reaches up to brush a strand of hair from your face.\

"Oh mi amour. Why don't you come back to my hotel room and I'll help you admit your real feelings" With the intent of his words hanging in the air Fernando turned on his heels and walked towards his car, head held high as you stared after him, your lip between your teeth.

-

This is a bad idea. You told yourself as the elevator doors opened, prompting your exit. This is a very bad idea. He's 20 years older than me! You were nearing his hotel door now, even without being given a time you knew he would have been waiting since the moment he had caught up to you at the carpark. I should not be doing this. I need to go home. Max is gonna kill me. Your movements didn't match your thoughts though as you raised a fist to knock gently on the door in front of you.

Taking a deep breath as you lowered your arm you waited no more than a second before being met with the face of Fernando Alonso.

"I was wondering when you'd show up" He spoke smugly as he stepped aside allowing you to walk past him and into the room.

The door closed behind you and your body froze as you felt a hand slide to sit on your waist.

"Now, are you going to admit it or are we going to have to do this the hard way hermosa?" His breath sent a shiver down your spine as his lips brushed your lobe. When you didn't make a move to speak in the time given Fernando used the hand on your waist to spin you so you were facing him, the force making you place your hands on his chest to steady yourself.

"Hard way it is then" Wasting no more time his lips were on yours in a heated kiss. You reacting positively not able to resist the man holding you. His hands traveled from you waist to your ass and he squeezed earning a groan from you. A smirk rested on his lips at the sound and he worked on removing your dress. The zip was down before you could register and the dress was falling to a pile at your feet which you stepped out of as you pulled out of the kiss.

"I told you it would look much better on my floor" Fernando sent a wink your way as his eyes racked over your body before his hands were back on it. This time taking off your bra so he could grab the flesh of your breasts. Letting out a louder moan than the one prior you felt needy to feel him too. Hands going to remove his shirt you allowed yourselves to separate so you could pull the shirt over his head, throwing it to the ground with your dress. Next you were unbuttoning his jeans as he slid them down his legs, kicking them off his feet and bringing his hands to grab the backs of your thighs allowing him to pick you up. With your legs wrapped around his waist Fernando walked you into his bedroom, the both of you caught in a kiss as you were laid onto the bed.

“Hermosa” Fernando whispered breathlessly as he pulled himself out of the kiss to look over your exposed body. With his mouth now paying attention to your breasts you let out a moan that made Fernando snake his hands down to remove your underwear while he focused on your chest. A finger glides through your folds making you gasp as your eyes snap to Fernando's whose already staring down at you.

"Please" You practically begged, your body craving his touch.

"Are you going to admit to having feelings for me mi amour?" You hesitated but quickly shook followed by a sharp bite of your lip as Fernando thrusted two fingers into you. You weren't able to keep yourself quiet for long though as Fernando immediately set a rapid pace.

"Oh god" Your words led a string of moans as Fernando begun to decorate your neck as his spare hand settled on your breast gently pinching the hard bud. His pace was unrelenting but you wanted more.

"Please Fernando, I want you inside of me" Without saying a word Fernando removed his fingers making you whine as he took off his boxes staring down at you as his tip brushed your wet folds. Silence filled the room as the two of you stared intently at one another. A pleading look in your eyes and a determined one in his.

"You want this amour?"

"Yes. I want this, please"

"Then admit that you like me" You were hoping to get away without speaking a word about feelings to Fernando but the fire in his eyes told you that he waws not letting another move be made until he heard this confession.

"I- I like you, Fernando" Your eyes avoided his as you finally confessed the one thing you'd been trying to run from.

"See. That wasn't so hard now was it?" Before you could even think of a response Fernando entered you without warning making you throw your head back as you tried to adjust to the size of him. You weren't given much time though as Fernando sets off at a bruising pace, his hips snapping into you as he hits the right spot every time that makes you slur out words of gratitude and praise. You could feel the knot in your stomach tightening quickly as Fernando only grew faster in his thrust. He was sure to hit deep inside of you, watching you take all of you and filling you up like he'd dreamt of. He wanted to make you feel good and that was exactly what he was doing. You grew closer and closer to your climax, your hands reaching to grab something, fists gripping at bedsheets.

"Tell me again hermosa. Tell me you like me" Fernando demanded, his thrusts getting sloppy as he too neared his climax.

"I like you Fernando, god I like you so much" You moaned out without hesitation. The moment the last word left your mouth Fernando leaned down to pull you into a passionate kiss as you both groaned into each others mouth, finishing together as you pulsed around him.

"Be mine?" Fernando asked through heavy breaths.

"Always"

[leaawrites]

I knew it, I know you

Lando Norris x fem!reader

summary: two people reflecting - and drowning in sorrow - on their lost almost.

Warnings: mentions of suicidal thoughts, angst, nothing about this is really happy tbh

Masterlist

It had been 2 months. 2 months since all the pining and longing and dancing around each other finally found an end. It was the end of something that was never more than considering but still bigger than nothing. It was what happened when two broken souls found another one. Too afraid to heal and too hopeful to let it go before it could begin. They were always at the starting line never beginning to run. And when she did. She was left alone. He didn’t run with her. His eyes focusing on the win, planning strategies on what may be and what may be not. It was more than nothing but never enough.

Now she held herself at night, his face on her TV, far away. She was focusing on him, never stop cheering and praying to see him succeed. There was always something that made him crumble in the end. Whether it be the car or strategy, he blamed it on him. He had done it ever since she told him that it was his fault they could never work out. It was never the outside world or the misplaced bodies of theirs in time. It was him. He didn’t run, he planned.

Now he sat alone in his big apartment in this big city, filled with glamour and luxury and nothing but his own breathing. It was the purest thing he owned now, after losing what he never truly had. It was only one step he should’ve taken and he couldn’t bring himself too. Everything was shallow now, eating up his insides until no emotion but guilt was left. He hated that he let her go. He hated that he was afraid of real life like some kind of moron in a novel. The one who would end up all alone at some point.

The room was dark and stuffed with thoughts and hot air. The blanket on his bed was wrinkled and tossed around. He hadn’t even found the motivation to make his bed that morning. Going to races for the last 3 weeks was what made his mind walk away from her for a while, but now that it was over it was only him now.

The doorbell rang, making him open his eyes. Lando made his way towards the door, opening it to see Max standing on the other side with food in his hand. The man wore a sympathetic look on his face. He was the only person who knew about what happened. He was the only person who knew about her.

“Thought you might be hungry,” he said, holding up the food in hopes of making him smile at least a little bit. But there was nothing coming from Lando.

He only stepped away to let him in, walking to the coach to sit on it and turn on the TV. Some crappy Reality show was playing but Lando wasn’t paying any mind to it.

“How have you been?” Max asked, sitting down next to Lando, pushing the food in front of his face so he couldn’t ignore it.

Taking the fork in his hand, Lando started to move the Chinese dish around in it’s box. Watching it move like it would satisfy his hunger enough to not eat it.

“Wonderful,” he said quietly, sarcasm dripping from his tongue like water. “Though about throwing myself from the balcony.”

If it was anyone else, Lando wouldn’t have said it. But it was Max, his best friend since childhood. He knew about Lando’s mental health, he knew that it was horrible at times. Though it was never this far, at least not to his knowledge.

“Have you tried talking to her?” He wasn’t aware of what happened fully, but he knew enough to be sure that Lando could fix it. It only needed him to work. It only needed him to find itself again.

“She blocked me everywhere,” Lando only said, avoiding a clear answer of yes or no.

He had tried, multiple times. He even called her mother, but no one was willing to let him in again. They were hiding her away from his shining sword and he understood why. But he hated that they were that way. He hated that he was that way.

“Look, man,” Max started. P, his girlfriend, had told him to go back to the secret plan. “P has been keeping contact with her. She is really not happy about how things ended, but she misses you. She really does. So, if you’re willing to make it work this time - for real this time - I’ll give you her address and you can decide what to do with it.”

Lando looked at him with wide eyes, his heart leaping from his chest to hug his mate.

“You’re willing to do that?” Lando asked, sitting up straighter now and turning towards him.

“If you eat up,” Max joked, playing parent for him.

“But then?”

“If you don’t mess it up.”

[drvscarlett]

Sweet Nothings (3)

Carlos Sainz x Pageant Queen!Reader

Summary: All that they ever wanted was sweet nothings but everything changed like midnight rain.

Sweet Nothings 1 2 3 4

A/N: this the second to the last chapter. The last chapter would be in story format and a lil bit of smau. Let me know what you folks think about this one.

ChiliUpdates just posted a photo

ChiliUpdates Media day duties for Carlos in Vegas today!

User5 Goodluck on Vegas,get that WDC carlos

User6 VAMOS CARLOSSSSS

User7 look at him being so smiley

User16 im so happy to see Carlos smiling so much, he deserves happiness.

ChiliUpdates posted a reel

//We are ready to extend our lead for the championship. I have a very good feeling that with my skills, car, and some luck then we might be able to surpass Max before we race in Abu Dhabi. I'm really excited to drive this weekend.//

liked by YNjpeg and 600,552 others

User6 Never imagined we will be fighting for the WDC this year

User7 Im gonna go and pray for a Ferrari 1-2

User8 Carlos is really a driven man, respect!

User10 Carlos are you getting excited to drive this weekend because someone is also here in vegas 👀

QueenYNUpdates just posted a photo.

liked by CarlosSainz55 and 2,982 others.

QueenYNUpdates Her gown for the prelims and the swimsuit competition

User7 DUDE THE GOWN!!!

User8 THE SLO MO TURN, MISS MAAM???

User65 ate and left no crumbs, all the other contestants can go home

YNjpeg posted a photo.

Liked by CarlosSainz55, McLaren, and 987,562 others

YNjpeg this is what we called the Ibong Adarna dress. It is inspired by a Filipino mythological bird that has the ability to enchant anyone who hears it sing. Furthermore, the Ibong Adarna is also a phoenix that regenerates and rises from the ashes. The dress is a symbol of resilience, rising and rebirth 🧡

Thank you for the team for making this amazing craftmanship.

User8 The lore behind her dress??? NO ONE CAN TOP HER ATTENTION TO DETAILS

User9 everyone should do it like her

User10 she is SERVINGGG,MY MISS UNIVERSE 2024

McLaren our 🧡👑

User5 admin so real for this one User6 anyone wanna bet with me that this is Lando's doing? User20 the fact that she is still the papaya queen for mclaren is like how carlos is still an unofficial family of mclaren

CarlosY/NUpdates posted a photo.

CarlosY/NUpdates Carlos Sainz' face when someone showed him a photo of Y/N in her prelim gown.

User5 wtf,why did they have to show him that???

User1 right??? stop bringing her up. User3 Hi im the one that showed him that. I was watching miss universe while waiting for carlos to sign a cap. Carlos saw my screen and asked me if I could show him when Y/N is on the screen. He was in the middle of the interview when Y/N came up so I kind of screamed to show him. Im sorry if I made any trouble. User9 me reading this made me cry

User6 look at the man and tell me that he is not in love with her

User7 he never stopped loving her, thats my theory.

User8 Im gonna play Gracie Abrams all over again

User10 Carlos you might trick everyone but those eyes dont lie.

ChiliUpdates just posted a photo.

liked by YNjpeg and 3,234 others

ChiliUpdates Carlos Sainz wins the Las Vegas Grand Prix. He is now 4 points ahead of Max Verstappen and is currently P1 in the WDC.

User1 WOW CARLOS!! WE USED TO PRAY FOR TIMES LIKE THIS

User2 THE NEXT FERRARI CHAMPION IS CARLOS. IM CALLING IT.

User3 Look at the pure glee on his face when he won. He deserves this so much

User4 Thats our smooothhh operatorrrrrr

User10 MISS MAAM YNjpeg what are you doing lurking here???

User11 isnt the miss universe starting in a few minutes??? User17 Y/N never beating the they are not yet over each other allegations

CarlosY/NUpdates just posted a photo.

CarlosY/NUpdates someone just saw Carlos outside the place for the Miss Universe!!!! They also reported Lando, Lewis, and Charles at the venue as well

User1 he is going to see Y/N! ITS HAPPENING!!!

User2 I love a supportive ex

User3 Y/N bringing out the whole grid to support her, its just so wholesome to think about

User7 They really went from racing suits to formal wear in an hour, Y/N's power over the grid User8 they really love her User9 especially Carlos. The man didn't celebrate and went to her right away User10 why did they ever break up?? they are so good with each other

User11 ugly crying

User12 I want a supportive ex boyfriend and a supportive friend group.

QueenY/NUpdates

liked by CarlosSainz55, LandoNorris, and 872,983 others

QueenY/NUpdates Take a look at the girl on fire! This is Y/N's evening gown, she is simply gorgeous in red!

User7 ugly crying, she is so beautiful

User55 WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT THE DRESS BEING IN RED???

User9 its literally screaming carlos sainz User10 Y/N and Carlos's color is definitely red

User8 SHE DESERVES THE CROWN, GIVE IT TO HER ALREADY!!

User12 and the explanation how she paid homage to her mother's hometown??? SHE IS OUR QUEEN

User13 i love how her dresses has a certain piece of history

User14 i dont usually watch pageants and I got curious because an ex wag is here but MYGOD SHE IS STUNNING!!

User22 send everyone home, Y/N is taking the crown

LandoNorris posted a story

YNjpeg replied: im so so grateful for your love and support LandoNorris replied: so proud of you!!! You deserve the best YNjpeg replied: stop making me cry LandoNorris replied: Carlos cried a lot when they started crowning you. LandoNorris replied: he has to share his universe to the universe lol

CarlosSainz55 just posted a photo.

CarlosSainz55 When I tell you that you are beautiful, I am not simply talking about your looks. I talk about your eyes that shows compassion, your heart that is so generous, and your voice that speaks for those who cannot speak for themselves.

I am extremely proud of you YNjpeg. Everything was worth it.

YNjpeg I'm always grateful for your support.

CarlosSainz55 always here for you.

CarlosSainz55 limited comments to this post.

[dayslynthesix]

a lot of people say that we who likes charles more we're not real tifosi but let me ask you something: what carlos sainz have given to ferrari? what it the legacy he will leave behind? what does he represent for ferrari? because all i cant think is how much of a cry baby he is, how much of a mid field driver he is and how much he is terrified to fight leclerc for a win, cause all of his 4 victories were at cost of leclerc race;

1) silverstone: ferrari deliberately choose not to pit leclerc under the safety car and kept him on track when everyone was pitting for fresher tyres and he would be in no condition to defend or to fight for a victory;

2) singapore: ferrari deliberately told charles to create a gap and not to attack sainz;

3) australia: max dnf and ferrari constantly telling charles to hold position and not to attack;

4) mexico: lift and coast all race and every time charles got closer ferrari told him to slow down, that's why he lost the p2, cause lando was so close because ferrari kept saying for him to slow down that when he was being attacked was to late, and also 👇🏻

cause when i think about carlos sainz & ferrari i think about a selfish driver who says constantly that his priority is the team but we see the races and we know that that's a lie; his only priority is to finish in front o charles. if charles is in p19 carlos will want to be in p18 and he is willing to fuck both they races in order to do that. his legacy will be 4 race victories that ferrari chose to gave to him, he haven't fight for any of them.

while drivers like seb and charles when you ask about their legacy the answer will be cause seb was a ferrari driver, he loved that team, he tried everything to give glory to the team, and the team failed him, and he never said one bad word about it. he's everybody is a ferrari fan, he's the singapore lion, he is eternally a side of a coin of what ferrari is. and charles, maranello sun, prince of ferrari, their predestinado, the man who won monza twice, the man who is ferrari face, the man who bleeds rosso corsa, the man who's willing to sacrifice his results for the team. that's a legacy, those drivers fought tooth and nails for their victories.

we don't care about carlos sainz.

carlos sainz will not be wearing red next year, he will be driving a williams and fighting for points and not having any victory given to him. while charles is going to be fighting a 7x world champion, wearing the infamous red suit. fighting for podiums and victories and for ferrari glory.

so sue me for not rooting for sainz and for being unhappy with todays results.

[magicalonsomanydances]

In preparation for the Spanish Grand Prix I feel I must give my ranking of my top 10 on the Grid as some way to soothe the frustration that I have no way to watch the race.

Carlos Sainz Vazquez de Castro Cenamor Rincón Rebollo Birto Moreno de Aranda de Anteriuga Tiapera Deltun absolute king of my heart and the reason I got into this sport. The prince charming of Spain who's so classy and gracious and just such a good teammate no matter where he is at. With his powerful tractor beam big brown eyes. Long live the smooth operator! Vamos Carlos!

Esteban Ocon. Am I aware that this is like loving the problematic lead in a film or book just cause he has babygirl energy? Yes. Is that gonna stop me? Hell naw! I like his backstory, disarmed by his squishy little face, and I vowed to defend him from all harm like the minute after I watched him analyze Cars as being an accurate depiction of various racing aspects. Plus he's from the same region of France as where my family originates. So while Carlos is my F1 husband Estie is like my F1 baby bro. I will call him "teapot" it's a long story feel free to send me an ask about it. I will also call him Esteban "Can Do No Wrong" Ocon. Yes I'm fully self aware of how delulu I am about this man having no flaws (he does I've just elected to ignore them in favor of being charmed by the innocent face)

Daniel Ricciardo - I'm from Texas, I'm an extrovert, I'm legally obligated to stan this man to the moon and back. The Honey Badger is my spirit animal. Not the actual creature, just chaos gremlin Daniel. His energy is infectious and he brings the party and he loves my state. How could I do anything but support him?

George Russell - he was probably the second crush I got in F1 and I kinda love how in spite of his posh model energy he actually isn't from some moneyed or legacy background and he's so delightfully clueless at times "goat, sorry?" And the videos of him with kiddos he's so sweet and attentive to them

Checo - the Mexican minister of Defense. The down to earth friendly dad energy. He's just so solid and sweet and I love what he does to help mellow Max just by ya know being the chill dad Max never had. Also he an authentic Mexican, endorsed Tex-Mex so obvs I'm gonna love this man and wanna get tacos and drinks. He has that approachable energy and given the US's one driver might not even have a seat next year I gotta support our neighbor Mexico's driver cause I sure ain't supporting the Canadian nepo baby

Fernando Alonso - this mainly has to do with sex appeal let's be real. He's got that edgy bad boy kinda external vibe in some ways but then he's backstage arranging flowers and it's like "I could fix him and make him settle down" he's got charm style and is basically an immortal and foxy as hell. Let me try to domesticate this man please!

Charles Leclerc - sweet, I would vote him most likely to be true even while he's traveling abroad being swooned over and having fans handing him marriage licenses. He's just a little too type A for me to love him like I do my golden retriever energy chaos creatures and chill guys of the previous 6. But he's great and it's because of him and Carlos in the C² videos that I got roped into this sport so he's gotta make it. Plus after all the loss he's experienced he's a real inspiration in staying kind in spite of the pain of life

Max Verstappen - speaking of inspirations my traumatized ass can't help but support one of my own. He's an icon of breaking cycles. Yes he's definitely had his issues but he's matured in some ways and while I don't care if he wins or not on the track I'm very invested in him winning at life which him being a doting stepdad to Penelope is the kind of healing that helps me heal too. Children of hard ass dads who didn't realize their childhood was fucked up, unite! Plus he's an absolute goofball and that's endearing

Logan Sargent - I'm american, independence day is literally my favorite holiday, I have to have this man in my top 10 and I genuinely do think he's a classy guy (especially considering he's from Florida) and I can't help but love how the one American driver is just so painfully American looking. He looks like Captain America fucked an apple pie. He looks like scientists designed an American in a lab. He looks like the Beach Boys had a grandson with the descendants of Betsy Ross. He looks like a team scoured frat parties for a year to find the most American looking guy in the country. He is Logan Sargent and he is Kenough.

Valterri Bottas - his absolute self confidence and zero fucks given. He does not take himself too seriously and he is wholesome AF. He also has practical guy energy. Like if I hand to rank drivers on Most Likely to Pull Over and Help You Change a Tire he's definitely in the top 3. He seems like getting his hands dirty is something he's not too good to do and he seems like a good dude. Plus he's hilarious. He's as chaotic as Daniel in some ways he's just a little less boisterous about it. Calm chaos vs 5 year old given 16 energy drinks in an hour Ricciardo energy

[lestappenforever]

A bit if a rant, but bear with me, I’ve been in this brain rot since seeing RBR’s threads and i just wanna get it out. (Yes i am the same person who hopes that Christian and RBR are so cold in DTS and this is the reason why i believe that there might actually be something going on, slowly brewing and simmering in low heat till it fucking explodes in *hopefully* Ferrari’s face) (if you couldn’t guess, I’m an RBR girl through and through)

Now lets start it from after Singapore, it was the very first time RBR posted Charles and Max, and let’s all be real for a moment, I personally don’t think that there was much to it, I mean, they’ve posted Lando, Fernando, Esteban, Pierre, etc. Its not that weird that they did that. That same weekend, Ferrari fucked up Charles and prioritized Carlos, despite the fact that both had a chance at a podium, but Ferrari (as Geogre said in that heartbreaking radio for any Charles fan) sacrificed Charles for Carlos. And then Fred saying that Charles agreed?! Let’s all just look back at something very slight, Charles is a petty king, he wants to win, he’s hungry, doesn’t want to be second, EVERYTHING that he’s done since karting proves that, but what Ferrari and Fred said that weekend didn’t make much sense. Yes, this weekend was not detrimental for the whole Charles to Red Bull agenda, but it might have been the start to it all.

Fast forward to the triple header, as Japan and Qatar didn’t have much, of course other than padel, but in terms if teams, controversies and fuck ups from Ferrari, there weren’t much.

Austin was the start to it all, the way RBR posted Lestappen VERY CLEARLY on their socials, shows that there’s something brewing, but not by much, its just, yeah 2 generational talents who have fought each other forever in their racing careers, doung it again, etc. But that wasn’t the only case. Red Bull have posted them both together, but so did Christian, and Horner ain’t one to be taken lightly. Everything this man does is fucking calculated, he’s chaotic, but in a way that I don’t think anyone can be, he knows how to play, and play he does. After the USGP with Ferrari’s most famous fuck ups of the floor infringement and putting Charles ONLY on a one stop, where the weather was EXTREMELY HOT on track, and all that with the lame excuse of “oh he’s better at tyre management” despite being on pole, shows something, Ferrari is NOT being a seriou team with Charles, because they then went ahead and were celebrating Carlos’ podium as if their other driver didn’t get disqualified.

On to Mexico, (aka the epitome of my delulus that RB are doing something in DTS in regards to Charles) we have the crazy pole that Charles pulled, as well as his data and onboards being shown along Max and Checo, there were no other drivers who were on that pit wall. We also have the part prior to the GP, where we all saw Christian and Charles arriving at the paddock at suspiciously close (you could say almost together if you didn’t know any better) then waiting for him, by the entrance of the paddock, where he knows Netflix are there and the fans are there, for a seemingly innocent hello (NOT), as well as Christian defending Charles, who had an accident with HIS DRIVER AT HIS HOME GP. You don’t see that, in a normal situation, Charles would be blamed for Checo’s DNF by Checo’s TP.

Onto Brazil, the final major fuck up by Ferrari, which cost a hungry Charles a battle with Max, and a chance at a win, simply because Ferrari decided againts changing the engine, which then fucks up the hydraulics, causing Charles a DNS. In addition to, again, Only his data is along side the RB boys. During this weekend, you could feel the shift in Charles, like he couldn’t take it anymore, he’s done being the scapegoat, the rag that Ferrari could do anything they want as he’s their Il Predesinato, he’s HUNGRY, he wants to win, and Ferrari simply for the last 5 years were unable to provide him with what he wants.

That’s how it was in Vegas and Abu Dhabi, Charles fought, he fought hard, and you might even feel like he’s hell-bent on getting these podiums, to show Ferrari how much they fuck him up during races, and what he’s capable of when they don’t.

All of that while both RBR and the official F1 accounts are pushing the Lestappen agneda, posts, Max’s statements that are kind of throwing shade at Ferrari, mentioning that he would mind anyone (while blatantly pointing at Charles) to be his teammate if checo were to leave by the end of the 2024 season, the RBR garage and team being friendly with Charles a bit too often. And then the most recent posts of putting Charles on the RBR Christmas tree, while Yuki, who is closely more related to RBR isn’t, and the most recent thread of “claiming” Charles,

RBR, Horner and even Marko are not stupid, they know how to stir a pot, how to cause chaos and drama, how to be cold, how to be that young team that could seem innocent, approachable, intriguing, in order to get what they want, how they want it and When they want it. And the fact that we know nothing of the new season of DTS, Ferrari just posting shit trying to distract from the fact that they haven’t announced Charles renewing, and they way the talk has died down about it, in addition to trying to distract from the RBR Lestappen saga on all socials that is happening rn, shows that there could be something, something thing, detrimental, vold as fuck and chaotic as fuck. Another thing that I have forgotten to mention is the whole Twitter saga that happened because of Will Buxton and Albert Fabrega around the time of the Triple header shows that there is Chaos that’s going to be unleashed, could be in DTS. And what’s Chaos with the Agents of Chaos?

(I’m extremely sorry for how fucking long this is, i just let my mind do the talking and didn’t realise how long i wrote until i was done 🤪)

I'm not even going to add anything to this, my lovely anon, because this ask deserves to shine on its own.

I love your beautiful mind, anon. Please come share your brainrots with me at any time. ❤️

[lilyrizzy]

slightly delayed day 4 of the 12 days of maxiel advent calendar! for @catofthecanals289 from our alzheimers universe! set in the same universe as this and this.

“Daniel, you have to, of course, aim higher.”

It’s as though the words snap everything back into focus while Daniel tries to remember anything getting blurred in the first place. 

In front of him, rows of red-nosed clowns topped with frizzy orange hair stare down at him. Them, he’s not alone. There’s something heavy in his hand. A baseball, he realises. He looks between it and the lines and lines of manic grins, and then Max’s face. His voice is full of laughter, so Daniel must be okay.

“What-“ Daniel begins, but it’s too embarrassing to ask what am I meant to be doing. Max just told him.

Max steps closer to him, his smile already flickering at Daniel’s obvious hesitation.

“Daniel?” He asks, cautious in a way Daniel doesn’t like. He doesn’t want Max to stop smiling.

The flashing lights of the arcade dance at the periphery of his vision, red, yellow, blue and then red again, as a mechanical imitation of circus music plays in a loop. A cheery voice reminds him over and over to down the clown.

“Sweetheart.” The word sounds like a question again, but at the same time unfamiliar. Wrong. “Schatje,” Max says then, and that’s- That’s better.

I love you, Daniel thinks, an electric shock of realisation that is as manic as their surroundings, like maybe it’s being felt for the first time. Then, the settle of it into the familiar warm weight in his chest tells him the truth; I’ve been loving you for a long time.

Wherever they are, he’s safe here.

Daniel turns back to the clowns, noticing now how they aren’t real and are just faces painted onto bowling pins. He does what Max told him to, and throws the ball higher.

To the applause of strobe lights and chiptune, he wins.

Throwing his hands into the air, he lets out a noise of delight in time with Max’s behind him. Ki ki ki, aye, a corner of his brain echoes, but he can’t make the words trip onto his tongue.

“Good job,” Max tells him, his hands a warm weight on Daniel’s waist. A champagne fizz fills Daniel’s belly like it’s maybe been a long time since he’s been touched there, but- No. That can’t be right, because Max loves him too.

I love you, also, he always says. Daniel wishes he would say it now. He can see that it’s true in the softness of Max’s eyes as he pulls him in to kiss him congratulations. Daniel wishes--

--

--Daniel’s hands are twisted into soft purple fur. At first he thinks it’s a jumper, but then his fingertips catch on the crinkled material of the horn, and it’s obvious what it is. A unicorn. For his sister’s baby, maybe.

As he searches the murky waters of his head for her name, his eyes catch on the landscape flying past him. Too vast and green to be Monaco, the car moving too fast. Monaco is the orange glow of car break lights, sitting bumper to bumper and swearing under his breath. He’s not the one driving now, but he doesn’t know who is either.

“Daniel?” The man says his name when Daniel glances at him, so it can’t be a stranger.

“Where are we going?” Daniel asks, cuddling the unicorn a little closer. It feels nice under his palms.

“Back to the ranch,” the man says. His eyes are very blue and pretty, but thinking that makes Daniel’s stomach twist. He shouldn’t- He has somebody who wouldn’t like him thinking that about somebody else, he’s sure.

Daniel nods. They’re on the left side of the road, so-

“I need to get ready for the race,” he says, with more confidence than he feels, but that must be why they are in Australia. The Grand Prix. Except, the weather outside the window doesn’t look quite like autumn. Looking down at himself, he realises he’s not wearing anything with the Red Bull logo, which means he’s probably late. “Christian is going to kill me if I miss practice.”

The man’s face does something complicated that Daniel doesn’t understand. Daniel is about to ask for his phone to call someone- Laura, he thinks his assistants name is maybe- when the man speaks again, his voice softer than before.

“The race has already happened, don’t worry,” he promises, but his voice is shaky. “I’m taking you home to get some rest.”

“Very good,” he says again, which is a little unhelpful, but then he adds sounding a little more genuine, “Everyone is very proud of you.”

“Oh,” Daniel says, feeling a little stupid, but also relieved. No one can be angry at him if it’s his time off. Unless he fucked up on track. Clearing his throat, he asks, “Did you watch it? How did I do?”

He watches the man’s hands tighten on the steering wheel for a moment, his eyes fixed firmly on the road.

Happy butterflies beat their wings inside Daniel, flying between his stomach and his chest. He made people proud.

“Gangster,” Daniel says with a grin, and because he can’t resist being cheeky, “did I beat Max?”

But saying his name out loud as the butterflies wilt to lead weights at the bottom of his belly. Daniel is pretty sure Max should be here, so where is he? The guy spoke about the ranch, and the ranch means family time, which means Max time. Max is- Max is-

Daniel turns to look at the back seat, but it’s empty. He tries to remember when he last saw Max, but where his face used to be there is only a fuzzy outline framed with a Red Bull cap. He touches a hand to his head and finds only his own curls under his fingertips.

“Where’s my boyfriend?” He asks the man again, his voice high now with panic. “My boyfriend, Max, where is-“ Then he breaks off to swear, because no one is supposed to know. Max might be angry that he told this man.

“Easy easy,” the man soothes, his nice blue eyes back on Daniel as his hand makes an awkward jerk forwards, and then backwards again, as though he was going to try to touch him. “Easy, Daniel, it’s okay, I promise. Max will-“ He breaks off to smooth his face into a gentle smile. He really is so pretty. “Max will be at the ranch. I’m taking you to him now.”

Daniel studies the man’s face for a moment. He seems nice, and Max loves Daniel, and Christian is proud of him today, so they wouldn’t let him get into a car with someone they didn’t trust to look after him. Besides, something in this man’s face has Daniel trusting him.  His mouth is kind. There’s a mark just above his top lip.

“Have we met before?” Daniel asks, surprising himself with the question. When the man’s smile turns sad again, Daniel tries to laugh apologetically. “Sorry if that’s a dick question mate, when you’re famous it’s- It’s easy to lose track.”

Strangely that gets the man to laugh. Daniel can’t help but join in as the sound tugs at the loose threads of his mind. Sunshine streaming through tall windows, the glitter of the sea just beyond them. Chasing a spotty cat down a hallway.

“That’s okay,” the man says, “I have driven you lots of places before, do not worry.”

His words are the final piece Daniel needs for his hammering heart to slow. Pitifully, he finds himself lifting the plushie to his face to press his cheek against its softness. It’s even nicer than when it was against his hands. He’s going to-

“I’m going to give this to Max,” he says, words muffled a little. “He- I- I think he’ll pretend it’s silly, but secretly love it. He’s a little shit like that.”

Max will like it, Daniel is sure. Max will like that Daniel was thinking about him.

[userlando]

A random brain roty thought just popped into my head, and I had to share.

Imagine being an actress and the same age as Lando. And you’ve been acting ever since you were a kid. And unbeknownst to you Lando has grown up watching you, you were his first crush. He has had posters of you, has stayed up too long waiting for your shows to premiere, as an 11 year old he even told his mum that he was planing to marry you. And even though he has grow out of his childhood obsession with you, he has never reaaaally gotten over you. Which is why he completely blacks out when you’re in the paddock one race weekend, and you’re wearing a mclaren hat. He didn’t even know you were into f1. For a short second he’s disappointed in himself for not keeping up with you well enough. Then he realizes that you’re walking towards him, and shit goes form bad to worse because he feels himself having forgotten how to make word come out his mouth let alone form sentences, and he also knows that he will never look himself in the eyes again if he makes a bad impression. / Uuuurgh I just truly would love to make this overconfident man crumble 😭 feel like he needs a good humbling experience from time to time…. On the other side I also just can’t help but think how it would go if he actually succeeded in making a good impression. His face when he’s just staring at his screen for minutes on end because he is seeing a text notification from you on HIS phone. I feel like he would seek advice like in those tik toks where a bunch of guys are gathered around a tv with one dude’s text messages being displayed from AirPlay and everyone else arguing about the response. He would probably only do this with his most trusted friends, but also people he thinks can give good enough advice like Daniel, who’s charm might help Lando in texting back the perfect responses. He would almost have to owe it to his younger self (and let’s be real also current) to win you over.

oh my god being lando’s childhood crush is such a concept. you just know that max would be eating that shit up, knowing lando’s darkest and most embarrassing secrets and feelings when it came to you. so imagine his glee when he finds out you’ll be attending a race, he just has to be there to witness his best friend crumble and make a fool of himself 😭 can you just imagine lando seeing you around the paddock and he’s too much of a chicken to introduce himself so he just sort of evades you, hides behind corners and let’s his team unknowingly shield him sldjksjsjs but also the sheer fucking pride he’d exude once he bags you? he’d take every chance he could get to brag about you

[gear-project]

Annon-Guy: Which Guilty Gear and BlazBlue/XBLAZE characters would be good at playing Poker (Texas Hold'em)? I'm asking because there's this game by TellTale called Poker Night 2 where you play Poker with Brock Samson (Venture Bros.), Claptrap (Borderlands), Ashley "Ash" Williams (Army of Darkness) and Sam (Sam & Max) with Gladis (Portal 2) as the Card Dealer. P.S. You should check up the conversation quotes on YouTube when you get the chance. They're fun 😊!

Who's the best "Gambler" and who has the best "Poker-Face"?

Well, if we're talking cream of the crop, that would be Johnny of course!

He gambles with the best of them, and he can read a situation faster than the average person could draw a sword!

But it's not like Johnny doesn't have any sort of weaknesses. When it comes to women, he tends to lose track of his concentration! Hah!

But, if we were to list some other "poker-players" that would do well in the game of Cards:

Slayer: He's just unflappable. You won't read him unless he WANTS you to read him.

Ramlethal: Despite her recent change in tastes, it's actually quite difficult to get a read on her emotions. She'd be very good at bluffing.

Bedman: You can't read someone who sleeps through everything. He'd be a surprisingly "patient" player. Bedman can also read others' thoughts through his abilities.

Venom: Not quite as powerful, but Venom can read other people's "aura", which means he has the upper hand in reading others' intentions! Perfect for an Assassin, but also perfect for a HUSTLER.

Kum Haehyun: Don't let appearances fool you! She can read the state of anyone with her Tuner's abilities… Of course, she's not very good at hiding her weaknesses… She's powerful, but risky.

Robo-Ky: Okay, now that's just cheating! Robo-Ky has X-ray vision and can see other peoples' hands! Robo-Ky does have some standards though, so he follows the rules if there are any.

Chipp: Here's the thing about Chipp: high risk, high reward. That's not only his fighting style, but that's also his life motto! He isn't very cautious, but if you're the type who goes all-in, he's good at negotiating the risks. His foresight ability is also second to none (impressing even the likes of Gabriel and Answer).

Answer: Chipp's right-hand man is also pretty good in situations that call for his talents. His memory and recollection abilities are a great tool in reading any given situation. He could probably use his knowledge to win horse race bets too!

Sol Badguy: He's known for his brute-force methods, but he's also a scientist, and his gambles tend to pay off significantly. I'd say, if Sol was in a situation where all bets are on the table, he'd be a sure bet to win! (He'd likely be an all-rounder player… no real strong traits, but no real weaknesses either.)

I-No: She's a performance artist to say the least. She can coax weaknesses out of anyone she meets, and when it comes to confrontations (bluffs), she can bluff with the best of them. She is a bit of a risk-taker though, so it might be tough to win in some situations in her case.

Potemkin: Hmm-hmm~ You weren't expecting a grappler to play cards, were you? Potemkin is actually very good at hiding his emotions, though once he has a winning hand, it's hard to really stop him once he gets going. His massive hands could probably only "just barely" hold his cards, but when you're the best at what you do, you don't need to worry about losing as much. That being said, Potemkin is still a bit of a slow-starter�� so getting good luck and a lucky hand might be troublesome for the likes of him.

Izuna: For a guy who doesn't like to stand out, but of course he'd be pretty good at bluffing. Izuna's a bit of a card shark on his own, but his methods are most likely unorthodox and random, so his luck is also just as random.

Axl Low: This man believes in the Goddess Lady Luck… he's surprisingly religious. And truth be told, he is pretty lucky, and he's good at reading situations very well. But, as Lucky as he may be, he doesn't take undue risks if he can help it… and he's not very good at hiding his emotions (unlike other potential players).

Goldlewis Dickinson: You can't have a game of Texas Hold'em without a True TEXAN! Gold is likely all about the payout: what risks to take and how much would be most profitable! He'd go full-force on a gamble, and he'd be good at hiding his plays… But reading others' bluffs on the other hand is his weak-point (he's not good at reading situations, or even when situations go awry…). Still, he'd make up for it by solid hands and nothing too risky. A well-rounded player.

Dr. Paradigm: What can I say? He's a master strategist. His tactics and planning are very thorough, though his luck is somewhat lacking (don't ever say "this plan is perfect" around him… it'll jinx). He's a good reader of tactics, so of course he'd be decent at bluffing and plays. But again, he hasn't had much good luck lately (or being playable as a GG character… hopefully that'll change someday soon).

Dr. Faust: Ooh~ A Wildcard player has entered the room! Faust is good at taking advantage of random situations, so he's very Luck-oriented. Having a Bag over his head also helps quite a bit for bluffing and calls. He does get a bit emotional at times, however… so having a stable hand might be difficult.

Nagoriyuki: A very focused and straight-forward player. He can spot weakness in other players almost immediately. Still, as strong as he is, he doesn't take many risks and as a result his luck and skill tend to taper off when he hesitates. It's also pretty easy to read someone who doesn't rely on those risks to get good hands. Even if Nagoriyuki wears a mask, he plays the game straight.

A.B.A.: You wouldn't think she'd be good at a game like Poker, but A.B.A. can hide her intentions and blend in a crowd very well. She tends to keep her cards close to the chest, so she wouldn't show very strong plays at first, but once she gets going, well… good luck trying to keep up with her! She's emotional and unstable, but her playstyle would be unique, on top of that she's great at bluffing! If she has to win for Flament Nagel's sake, she'll do anything and risk anything to win!

Well, that was fun to write… I hope you enjoyed it! I will check out what you suggested eventually!

[the-firebird69]

And here comes Tommy f with his Atlanta b******* again that he's not the one that's been murdering the max we wouldn't know who it is let's go ask Jamie chomo no let's ask Trump or how about Mac let me know who it is. So son heard after we said it he said then there is nothing after him and that's what the guy says cuz he's a jerk so I'm going to have him arrested trying to listen to the piece of s***

Son says hurricane he's trying to say he's the hurricane and we do get the connotation and he was discovered because of the hurricane and he's saying it's the Max and they were discovered because of the hurricane and they're trying to do something wrong and it did expose them and they go about saying it was designed to expose him and really it only exposes those guys now it does a little bit I didn't expose this much we're not the max who sit and blame everybody and are running it and you're trying to get somewhere you can't that's what they're doing. What's the movie is about but they are saying that our son is the hurricane and that he's somehow stopping them and it's about this book that he wrote when he was in prison. And they keep encouraging as a matter of fact and they say that he's saying stuff to make him lose and he's saying no I'm not and they argue a little and our senses I don't feel like arguing right now come back later and then Mac he gets really mad. Truth is really not part of your society and we don't like what you're doing saying all the time about lots of it and tell me if didn't go to jail as a boxer for winning he went to jail for his boxer for winning later and not like the movie he is going to jail because he's a success and they're saying it's analogous to our son and they are lying of course the real story started to war in America and that's why it's famous.

But he tried to use a hurricane and it made it much worse and that's an analogy too to our son and they won't stop having him do stuff and sees an idiots it's dangerous now I have to compensate for packing everybody and their dumb way and their reaction to stupid s*** it needs are having to put out there and we're going to react and you're going to get killed and we're not ain't going to regret the stupid a****** method with our son

We approved Hera's idea I'm going out to Utah and will be a guide. . It's really his papa and he said if you face this man you're going to lose to Billy z and every time and he told him he can tie them up but he's just this guy with a weapon and waiting to hand it off. What's up

The side note he says we can do dragon Ball z with that fly area idea and people are signing up for it even though it doesn't exist yet and it's a little bit faster than Harry Potter now they want both and you can put a different background in the computer and 3D elements as you need is a special room and stadium too as I'll make it a stadium people can watch it and be amazed it's going to turn into professional games real quick. This guy came up with fly races and said like flake harassing he didn't but that's what it means and it's not a bad idea to see who would be faster..

But really this movie is supposed to be a precursor to them simply taking us down like they are tommy f

As we're taking the Midwest and it's going away

There's an announcer on TV and he wanted to go get a divorce and he said get a few people ready for a race he was trying to set it up and you couldn't and no he's not a Mac.

The max reaction is bad they say they're going to figure out what we're doing and stuff like that who we are and so on and they're trying to find Jen and Melissa and more and they haven't and they're trying to find out what's down there and they can't and they're trying to go to the big diamonds and can't and I need to and they have to grab Tommy F and that's what they came to conclusion there's a small war against him now with all this other stuff going on

So prove the idea that Hera had and it is a good one. It's for him to go to Utah and those are the Rockies and she was laughing at him cuz he woke up just now and it's because the Rockies are in the Rockies with Utah I said I thought it was south of the Sierra Nevada's and she goes no it's one of the Rockies he saw them and he says oh God and she says I'll remember for you this is good but you did last time and I couldn't remember it so she smiley smiling and he says oh yeah. So really I'm doing the best I can with the folks I got here I'll make it work somehow remote viewing it says try that he's joking we're always there so here we are talking about it and the idea is pretty good her presentation was mean to him because the gerbil stuff I guess you knew about it wasn't telling him. Well that's action. So it gets tossed out of the squirrel hole in the animated dream. But for real it's a good idea it should be like a bodyguard and it's not sure what that would entail probably medium at the airport making sure he gets the meeting. What's funny is you just give me watching him get the money because yeah what was he going to do with it that's what she wants to be there for if you work for the lawyer of ours that's a fun way to do it and she'll be nervous as his mom.

She's smiling because she says it'll work out it worked out fine for me

So were going to approve the idea

Thor Freya

And yeah we said the last line

Olympus

Good

Hera

[macybeckham7]

My Champion

12th December

Just like every F1 fan you were a bag of nerves, you were ready to soak up the history and tell your kids where you were when you witnessed Lewis getting his 8th Championship win.

You thought you would of been in Mercedes paddock in Abu Dhabi, supporting your fiancé but in fact you were in your family home. You texted him in the early hours this morning wishing him luck and giving him the same text that you often gave when you couldn’t make it to his races.

‘Make everyone proud x’ you signed it off, which made him feel you by his side, even if it was the ghost of you.

The race was a full rollercoaster of emotions, you cheering loud as watch as he fights with Perez, you and your dad high-fiving when he gets pole position. You falling on the sofa when the safety car comes into play, and in tears when Max and him were side by side for the last race. ‘He has this’ your dad whispering, as you could barely even look.

‘Please Lew’ you whisper, as you listen to the commentator.

The sea of orange of the Dutch fans going crazy as their man just won. You watching as Lewis had a moment with his dad before going out and being a true gent.

You didn’t have to think too much into it, you booked the next plane ticket out to him. Knowing that he needed you, you knew how heartbroken he was going to be, he didn’t lose he got his Championship stolen.

….

‘I told you to leave me alone!’ he says as he opens the door, expecting it to be his dad, but he was taken aback that it was you. Neither of you said anything before you engulf him with a hug. ‘Are you really here?’ he whispers. ‘I’m here’ you say as you squeeze him. He hides his face in your neck as your scent fills his nostrils.

He lets you in, you closing the door behind you before following him into his suite. You sit beside him on the sofa, he gently resting your head against you as you kiss his forehead, making him feel a shiver go down his spine.

‘I’m sorry’ he whispers. ‘I didn’t make everyone proud, the better man won’

‘No’ you say as you hold his face, looking into his eyes. ‘You didn’t let anyone down, everyone is so proud of you. I’m sorry you didn’t get it but everyone knows who the real champ is’ you say softly.

He leans his forehead against yours. You give him a gentle kiss against his lips. ‘You are so loved and you are my champion’ you say before engulfing him in a hug.

You knowing that you had to be there for him and get him up after such a bad way to end a season that he loved and enjoyed.

[chil2de]

Your sharing a bed with the JJK men hc's were incredible 😩 special mentions for Megumi's bed head, Nanami being a secret cuddle bug, and Yuuta having to drink both iced coffees (that fucking sent me fjdndnfd I could picture it so clearly).

You're super talented so could I, er, possible get a NSFW version? 👀 💳💥💥💥💳💳💥💳💥

Thank you so much 🥺💕

hello anonie!!! thank you dear i’m so glad you liked them!! please the credit card emojis had me cackling LMFAOOOO you really made my whole day out here!!!(THE ICED COFFEE WAS MY FAVOURITE PART TOO)

well i managed to hit the max amount of characters allowed in a tumblr post with five characters alone so i’m going to have to split this up into several posts. it just kinda happened ig

characters in this post: itadori yuuji, gojo satoru, okkotsu yuuta, fushiguro toji (megumi was supposed to be here but i had to reserve him for next post😔)

this work is nsfw. if you’re new here, please read my disclaimer before proceeding. thank you and enjoy!

based off of this post

itadori

- itadori would prob be a ‘deer in the headlights’ if you woke him up in the middle of the night

- but after that? shit, he’s so nice to you. so kind and generous for his baby girl. whether he’s fucking you ‘cause he thinks you might be able to sleep after an orgasm or there’s just an incessant desire for him- doesn’t really matter all that much to itadori. he loves you either way :)

- gets horny so easily LMFAO

- would 100% dick you down if you asked him to and i like to think that he still keeps his really sweet personality during sex cause aaaa he would be so soft and reassuring

- hardcore dom yuuji sounds sexy as all hell but let’s be real… this man won’t kill a fly and apologises for stepping on ants. only exception being angry sex but overall reserving hard dom for sukuna :)

you pepper tiny kisses onto itadori’s face, treating him with the utmost care like handling fine china. his skin feels so soft against your lips, and he smells very faintly of milky soap. there’s some traces of brand cologne on his shirt, as well as his natural scent.

“yuuujiii-“ you coo, blowing air very gently. when he doesn’t stir, you run your fingertips through a bundle of his cotton candy tainted hair. it evokes a reaction from him, so you continue to press him.

“y-uuuu-ji!”

after a few moments, itadori lets out a soft whine before grumbling incoherent blabber. “i won’t eat the pineapple! kugisaki will scream at me!”

you giggle before prodding him again, when finally he relents and jolts awake, eyes wide and mouth slightly parted at how close your face is to his.

“‘s it morning yet?” he wrinkles his nose, stifling a yawn. you emit a hum in thought before wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling you into him. itadori squeaks in surprise when he feels you latch your lips onto his neck, suckling and carefully breaking the bonds underneath his sensitive skin. his moan comes out groggy, still laced with sleep.

“that drives me crazy, you know that, right?” itadori laughs, though his voice comes as a wobble.

“i know. and they look so good on you too, hm?” you giggle, caressing one hand from his neck and then down to the hem of his shirt. your fingertips flutter against his bare skin and he shivers physically and audibly. you smooth your palm flat along his chest, dragging your nails carefully against his muscles.

“kinda.. wanna.. go to.. sleep.. but i don’t.. wanna fall asleep…” itadori mumbles against his pillow. the fabric muffles most of it, but there’s a strain in his voice that leads you to believe he’s moaning lightly. guess after sukuna ripped his heart out, this area hasn’t been quite the same, huh?

“so? then go to sleep, yuuji. i’ll be fine-“ “-no way! i gotta take care of you”

“so why don’t you?”

“‘m going to! i was asleep just half a minute ago!”

“and besides-“

he shifts himself up into a sitting position, leaning his back against the headrest. itadori opens his arms, motioning for you to crawl on top of him. without any haste, you clamber over his built frame, ghosting just over the print of his hard dick.

“not that i mind but- we did, you know, in the morning already-“ “oh, shit, sorry- it’s totally fine if you don’t want t-“ “-just messing with you!”

itadori pulls your neck down and gifts you with the same treatment you were offering him earlier. his tongue is hot and wet against your skin and you can already feel the precipitation forming at the back of your knees. calloused yet tender hands smooth around your waist and he smooths his palms over your shoulder blades.

after itadori’s satisfied with the mark he left, you can’t help but groan a little into his mouth when his lips suddenly claim yours. he drinks you up, relying solely on your taste like he’s drowning and you’re the air he needs.

itadori takes his sweet time cherishing you, or rather it’s still his state of half slumber, but you can feel a dull ache prick your abdomen. you scratch up his shirt, motioning for him to take it off. you’re unsure what comes over you, but shit, you don’t want him- you need him.

“heyheyhey, ‘s okay. don’t worry, i got you.”

“i’ll take care of you.”

“just relax, okay? i got this.” he only coos with sweet reassurances, peppering small kisses and handling you with the utmost precision.

you whimper, balancing your palms flat against his abdomen for additional support as you sink down onto itadori’s cock. he lets out a hum of content, forehead bumping against yours as he allows you to adjust.

“you good?” he murmurs after a few moments, capturing a few strands of your hair in between his fingertips. you nod meekly and itadori hisses out a breathy exhale. he’s sure that if he goes rough as shit you might end up more broken than being able to sleep, so he screws his eyes shut and exhales to maintain his composure.

blazing hot lips scrape against your ear, and his voice comes out in a husky tone.

“tell me how you want it.”

by the lords of everything and all that is holy, itadori only chants the same phrase over and over in his mind. it’s a miracle that he’s able to think straight with all the blood rushing to his cock. he’s more than happy to take it slow, reward you with slow and long strokes while he showers you with high praises. but he can’t ignore the twitch that he experiences when he envisions that pretty lil fucked out face of yours, all messy and ruined for him.

you mutter that you have no preference, that you don’t care because anything he’ll do for you is perfect, and it only gives him a beaming smile at your words.

itadori grabs the scrunched up ball of his shirt that he was wearing before ripping the fabric into half with his bare teeth. you watch his eyebrows perk when he notices how fucking hot you just found that, evident with the way your walls fluttered around him.

“here, babe.”

you part your lips and he stuffs the fabric into your mouth, there’s a little bit of excess hanging out, but he reminds you that you look sexy as hell either way, on top of his dick like that with your hands on his chest, legs spread, face flushed and ready for him.

“don’t wanna be wakin’ anyone else up.”

yuuta

this man is about to end my whole career

yuuta wouldn’t bring it up on his own accord just because… respect.. and he doesn’t want to pressure you or make you uncomfortable into doing things you’re not ready to.

it’s kind of a gray area for him because he doesn’t relish the idea of bringing up sensitive and/or extremely awkward topics so he really said ‘i’ll leave it up to future me’s problem’

but holy shit. let me absolutely tell you.

the second you hint at it? anything of the sorts? 0 to 100. he is FREAKY you cannot tell me he’s innocent just LOOK at the man

can make you scream with ease. all that practice he’s been doing with handling katanas? he doesn’t need his dick to make you cum. will gladly lick up your leftover juices and remark with a smile on his face how ‘it tastes good, angel’

similarly to itadori, i think he would be sweet and patient when asking for your preferences, etc, but after that you’re gonna have to find something to bite onto

“and? what’d you tell her?” yuuta remarks from over his fanned out deck of three cards. his gaze flickers to you as he awaits a response before using his index and middle finger to lay down a +4 card.

“red, by the way.”

you huff and glare at your boyfriend, picking up four cards and attempting to hold them in such a way that they don’t all fall and rattle to the floor. truth be told? you’re seriously a sore fuckin’ loser. you don’t know how he does it, but you’ve never managed to win a game against yuuta.

“i told maki-san that it’s her problem, not mine. if she’s so pressed about people taking them, why does she keep noodles stored in the fridge? really, noodles in the fridge? they’re really spicy as well! made my nose run like hell.” you scoff in distaste, throwing down a random red card on the pile.

“you totally ate them didn’t you?” yuuta giggles, beaming you a wide smile.

“also.. told her that i didn’t see them instead but- yeah.”

“aren’t you worried she’ll find out? oh, and, uno.”

“she might just beat me up to be honest, and, uno, you say? not anymore, love.” you sneer, throwing down a +4 card.

“i want green.”

“i’d protect you.” yuuta states over his cards. you feel like cracking a joke and laughing, but there’s absolutely zero implication on his facial features to show that he’s joking. that, and his serious tone, of course.

you flip your cards down onto the table and yuuta squeaks, pointing towards them.

“uh- i can see your cards-“

“it’s okay, not like i was gonna win anyway.”

at this point, yuuta’s mind races a hundred miles an hour. he’s panicking, blood pressure raised, heart thumping and throat clogged. oh, shit, did he do something wrong? did he upset you? is it ‘cause he said he’d protect you with no regards to the fact that you’re perfectly capable of fending yourself off against maki? fuck, he’s such a god damn screw-up, can’t even take care of his girlfriend correct-

“hey.”

your fingertips slide around his neck, hands interlocking at the base of his head. your thighs balance on his lap and you straddle him, legs either side of his.

he can’t help but hitch his breath, holding it in as though one wrong move and you would dematerialise.

“what’re you thinking about in that head of yours?”

whether you’re referencing his mini panic attack just now, or if you’re referring to all the multiple times he’s battled just bending you over and railing the absolute shit out of you, there’s not much room for debate when you brush your clothed sex up against the print of his dick.

yuuta snakes his slender hands around your throat, holding it in place. you can feel the arousal pool and wash over you, and you’d be more than surprised if you hadn’t soaked through your clothes.

he lets out a breathy laugh, devastating your stomach with butterflies due to how attractive he sounds. yuuta’s soft lips brush the shell of your ear and his other hand moves to rest on your waist,

“why don’t i show you?”

before you can utter a tease something along the lines of “show me what? how you’re too scared to hit me in bed?” you’re already down, flipped over and bent over the table you and yuuta were using moments prior ago for uno. the cards have splattered all over the wooden floor and you only hiss in discomfort as the cool surface scratches against your delicate skin. your boyfriend towers over you, leaning down as his torso clicks into place against your back. even through his titanium white jacket, you can feel his calm and collected heartbeat. he rests his head on your shoulder, nudging his face into you.

“don’t scream, okay? or, try not to, at least-“

his warm fingertips ghost over the curve of your ass, where he pinches the skin there before delivering a loud slap. you squeak, back arching as you jolt from the action. he proceeds by grabbing the inside of your thighs, long middle finger hoisting around your underwear and pulling it to the side. he makes note of the red lingerie you’re wearing and gives you a small chuckle, peppering a kiss to the side of your face.

“-unless, of course-“

“-you’d prefer everyone hear me fuck you stupid.”

“safe word’s blue, angel. i love you and thank you.”

truth be told, you were never sure what to expect from yuuta. hell, you’d never really seen the man’s dick before, sure you caught glimpses in the morning whenever he’d wake up but it’s really not the same. nothing in the world can compare to the first time you felt his piping hot tip brush up against your slicked cunt. and it was embarrassing, actually, the way your pussy was seething for him already.

with a firm hold on your tailbone, yuuta utilises his lower body strength to ram his dick all the way inside. there’s a garbled and choked moan that hisses from you when you feel your walls wrap and deform around the girth of yuuta’s dick. you whine even more so when you can physically feel a thick vein that decorates his shaft.

“the mirror.” yuuta commands in a low tone, redirecting you to glance at the same mirror you’d always fantasised about him fucking you in front of.

his eyes are half lidded, riddled with concentration. it reminds you of that feral and focused gaze he gets during serious battles.

“don’t look at me. look here.”

you trail the outline of yuuta’s arm veins as a result of him rolling his uniform sleeves up; following his v line that points towards his dick. you can only gawk in awe when you realise you’ve taken him to the base of his shaft.

his gaze locks with yours for a split second and he snaps his hips out until just about his tip is visible inside your cunt.

and shit, if his pretty pink cock isn’t the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen, especially with that attractive curve. you’re sure the gesture is just to wind you up, but you can’t help but swoon at him showcasing his pride to you.

“so- mmhf- pretty-“ you whine, words jumbled and breath caught when he slams his dick inside without any prior warning. you can only shriek in exclamation when his tip bruises your cervix, and you’re unsure whether you lament the sensation or not.

he only gives you a cheerful hum, reminding you of his usual cheery disposition. it’s not until then that you realise how much of a fucking beast he’s acting right now.

“right? i’ll put it to good use, i promise.”

gojo

- i know we’re all thinking the same thing here lmfao

- trying to sleep? good for you, now, open your legs for satoru.

- oh you can’t sleep? atta girl, down on your knees for satoru.

- bye i can literally imagine gojo saying some dumbass shit like “think you were trying to sleep but i couldn’t help but think how good my dick would look down your throat like that. sorry, love, you’re not sleeping tonight.”

you blink your eyes in turn with the cicadas chirping aside, stifling a yawn. everything around you down to the very last detail screams at you to sleep, but you just cannot. from the pitch black night that floods the room obscurely, to gojo’s even and quiet breathing beside you. you’ve tried it all. you’ve counted an excess amount of sheep, you’ve tensed and relaxed your body more than you can remember. hell, no matter how many times you’ve flipped the pillow you always seemed to feel less exhausted each time.

you can’t watch netflix, because you’ve binged all your favourite shows. it’s not that you’d wake gojo up because, who cares? by the time you finish scrolling through the endless lists it’ll be time to get up.

you ponder over the things you can do, continuing to subconsciously blink furiously. that is until gojo makes note of your stupid actions and starts giggling like a high schooler at his first sleepover.

“what the hell are you doing?” he snorts, cackling into the pillow like it’s the best joke he’s heard for quite some time.

“shut up, satoru. i’m trying to sleep you ass.” you tut at him, berating him for ruining your divine concentration.

gojo audibly shifts onto his stomach, his right arm crosses over the back of his head as he lazily rests his palm onto his scalp. the other arm preoccupies itself by landing it smack bang onto your chest, fingers wandering up to cup your breast.

“satoru, huh? that’s daddy for ya” he remarks, still giggling in a state of half asleep.

“uh-huh. goodnight.” you dismiss him and his nonsense.

“just go take a shower. always helps me whenever i can’t sleep.”

“hm? you’re giving me actual good advice and being a normal boyfriend? i think i might be asleep already, this is the best dream ever.” you remark sarcastically, prying gojo’s glued wrist off of your breast and sitting up. you could go for a shower, actually. you’re not sure why but it’s always so therapeutic to take one at night rather than the morning.

“huuuh? how could you say that? you’re so mean, (y/n)-chaan! i offered you my love and the world and this is how you repay m-“

“-goodnight satoru. i love you.”

“don’t think professing your love for me will change my mind! i’m still upset at you right now, young lady!” gojo shouts from over his pillow, exclaiming and irritating you in the way he knows how to best.

“yeah, yeah. okay.” you mumble softly to yourself, bearing a wide grin from ear to ear nonetheless.

when you move to crank the water on in the shower, you realise that you didn’t bring along a change of clothes. you momentarily pop back into the bedroom to ransack the drawer for anything that you can find.

“are you back to apologise for being so mean to me?” gojo whines and you can see the pout evident on him even when it’s pitch black.

“no, i’m just here for clothes, satoru.”

you hear him mumble something but it’s muffled by the sheets he’s underneath so you don’t heed any attention to it and resume in taking a shower to help keep your insomnia at bay.

with a ginger step and a small ‘oopf’, you heave yourself into the large shower that only a headass like gojo would bother buying. it’s reminiscent to what a hot tub looks like on the inside, with surrounding jets practically in a full 360 degrees. the things so steep that there’s a small step up in front of the shower outside the actual structure. it must have cost quite the fortune.

you reach in for the built in shelf to grab ahold of some of your toiletries as you allow the water to fall in a gentle sprinkle, almost like rain. there’s an audible squeeze reminiscent to trying to get the last ounces of ketchup as you apply some body gel to your hands, lathering it up.

despite standing, the warmth of the water leads your muscles to feel less tense. the only noteworthy downside is that the running water is tremendously loud. how on earth is gojo sleeping through all that racket?

slender fingertips ghost over your inner thighs. you can feel his wet and sturdy chest in place against your spine.

“surprised to see me?”

“you know i can’t let my baby talk shit like that.”

really? that’s his issue at hand here?

“so which is it?”

“acting like an intolerant brat because you’re tired or ‘cause you wanna get dicked down?”

gojo loops his arm underneath your leg, bending it up. you almost topple over in the process and you lay one hand flat against the tile.

“don’t answer that. sometimes it’s so obvious that you’re such a whore for my dick.”

“huh?! what the shit are you saying?” you snap at how correct he is.

gojo yanks your face back, digging his fingers into your cheeks as he forces you to face him. it almost sends your neck into two pieces, straining to look back at him.

“oh, really princess? just the other day you were begging me to fuck you”

“remember that? couldn’t wait so you rode me in the car? you know, baby, all you gotta do is ask.”

your legs tremble and psyche wobbles when he pries your mouth open with his thumb, promptly before spitting into it.

“don’t bother with the bullshit. i’ll play the games, not you.”

he drags his hard cock against the curve of your ass, slapping it against you.

“i don’t think i feel like fuckin’ you right now.” gojo sneers, humming sardonically. his lips quickly latch onto yours when you spin around to meet his gaze. like the fucker he is, gojo moans and whines into the kiss- lips ravaging you whole and tongue capturing your essence.

“baby girl, i was gonna let you top me. you know i don’t let anyone do that.”

his long middle finger prods against your cunt, forcing itself in with ease.

“damn, you’re soaked. you really wanted to milk me dry that bad?”

you hate him. hate him so fucking bad. he flashes you that attractive smile of his, azure eyes sparkling and snow white hair disturbed with water.

gojo pulls his finger out before sucking onto it in front of you, lapping all the excess arousal off.

“i’m not playing with you tonight.”

toji

- i literally don’t even need to say anything here

- just be sure to make a hospital check up appointment or something

- um-i uh- please remember to breathe after this one? maybe touch some grass? ALSO my first time writing for toji AAA i hope he’s okay

maybe if you don’t breathe? nah, that wouldn’t work. there’s still air acting around your limbs when you move so you’d be disturbing the barriers there. let’s see… maybe bit by bit? surely if you slowly inched his shirt up? then again, wouldn’t toji chew you out halfway through? maybe you should just give it to him straight up? just slip your hand under his shirt. come on. but he looks so peaceful, sleeping like that.. long eyelashes fluttered closed, lips relaxed and not scowling. his eyebrows are softly arched. he looks so soft, lips parted, chest rising and falling with every breath.

fuck it. just do it. cuddle him already.

you muster up all your courage in one fell swoop and you bend one leg over toji, resting it just above his groin. your right arm sprawls out over his chest and your hand rests against his toned arm. he’s already sleeping with one arm bent up with his hand supporting the back of his head, so you utilise the free real estate to nestle your head in the crook of where his shoulder and collarbone meet.

when he doesn’t move after a while, you deem your life to be safe and exhale with ease.

“you’re not asleep.” toji states in a groggy, husky tone. it’s supposed to be a question, but, coming from him it almost sounds like a challenge.

“yes?” you squeak out meekly.

“‘yes?’ you asleep or not?”

“i can’t sleep again.” you murmur against his shirt and he exhales a small sigh. the arm that you’re clinging onto moves to draw small circles on your thigh that rests on toji.

“when’d you notice?” you inquire, glancing down at his large wrists.

“like five minutes ago. nice try, kid.” toji snorts indifferently, chuckling at your behaviour.

when you don’t make an effort to respond, toji’s interest peaks and he lets out a small hum of intrigue when he follows your gaze.

he turns his head, brushing his lips up against your temples.

“see anything interesting down there?”

“as a matter of fact-“

you nestle yourself in between toji’s large and built thighs, digits curling around the waistband of his boxers. he only smirks at you through the dark, cock twitching through the fabric. you notice toji hover his hips up so that you can slide his boxers off for him and you happily oblige.

“-i do.” you chime, licking your lips.

it’s cute, though, if you thought toji was gonna let you handle him like that all by yourself.

as you kiss a trail up his thick shaft, toji yanks ahold fistfuls of your hair before grabbing your face off of his cock.

“who said you could suck my dick? that’s real cute.”

“thinking you actually have a place in my house.”

“i didn’t train you to be such a depraved slut. know your fucking place, because this isn’t it.”

“how many times do i gotta tell you? you don’t belong here. look around. do you see anything that shows a woman lives here? no? that’s because you’re nothing but a fuck doll for me.”

toji hisses out profanities at the gag you spew when he slams your tiny little mouth back down on his dick.

“lose the teeth you imbecile. unless you’re trying to tell me that you can’t suck my dick properly.”

incessant whines and garbled sentences are muffled by toji’s cock. whatever remnants you had of your vision are nothing but a blur as tears stream your cheeks, nose running and sniffles resurface in a repeating pattern over the slick sounds of slurping and gagging. your mouth stretches as far as it can go and the corners of your lips shriek in despair. you can feel the skin there stretch and pull beyond what’s considered normal.

even through all that, you manage to glance up at toji through your water logged lashes. you’ll be a good girl for him. you need to be.

“fuuuck. that’s a pretty sight.” he grumbles and a deep chuckle resonates through his chest. within a few moments, toji fumbles to reach for something.

you can only wince and screw your eyes at the suddenly blinding flash of a light in front of you. one can only assume he’s taken a photo of you in your humiliating state.

you can feel the fear settle into your veins when that telltale ping of a message being sent vibrates throughout the room. if you were to listen hard enough, you could hear a notification go off in the next room over.

your throat feels raw, jaw tense and locked open. it’s been a good twenty minutes of toji face fucking you to teach you a valid lesson. it’s all in the will of him wanting to drag this on, savouring every miniscule slurp, whimper or gasp. when his strokes start to feel sloppier than usual, you can’t help but feel relieved.

as you squirm about due to toji shooting hot ropes of his thick cum down your throat, the door softly clicks open.

“megumi. you’re just in time.”

“she’s way more obedient than your mom ever used to be.”

[shurelyasreverie]

Ezreal, Kayn, Yone Reverse AU Headcanons (100 Followers Special)

The title was the easiest way I could put it, but it's headcanons for an AU where Ezreal/Kayn/Yone are league players and the reader is a playable champion in the game. Thank you so much everyone for a hundred followers! I hope you'll accept this post as a small gift of thanks. I also find Reverse AUs a super fun concept so lemme know if you want more posts like this

Ezreal

(I just had to do him, there's no content for him and his voice actor is literally a host on League Proguides asldkfjad)

Ezreal's been playing League since the earlier seasons and ever since he was allowed to get his hands on a computer. He essentially knows the ins and outs of the game and is a die hard fan

Despite having good knowledge and skill with all champs, there was something about you and your abilities that Ezreal loved. After one game he already had a perfect feel of your champion and managed to get a triple (maybe even quadra) kill. He knew you were the next one to main

Give it a week, two max and he had Mastery 7 on you with minimum mastery points. Give it a month and you'll be the champion that he's played the most out of all time

He loves playing you but if you're ever banned, he'll accept that he'll have to play another champ. But if the enemy team has you, he feels unhealthily guilty every time he sends you respawning back at the fountain

Ezreal also loves to geek out on the lore. He's read up on everything about you, your biography, your short stories and he's watched all the cinematics you're included in. He's searched for your fanart and has probably set you as his wallpaper on his computer. In his settings, the voice line volume is maxed out, he loves hearing your monologues or interactions with other champions

A shameless simp. He's ended up crushing on you and he's going to embrace it. He's read all the self insert content for you and has probably written his own. He also gets pouty about any other champ that canonically gets to interact with you in the lore

He is a shameless but also a broke simp. He hasn't bought your skins but he's managed to gain a couple through Hextech chests and many, many rerolls

If you're selected for a music project like K/DA or True Damage, someone save Ezreal's heart because he's not going to be able to handle it. He’s bought the album, he’s learnt the lyrics and he’s learning the dances

Kayn

Kayn is a pretty tryhard player. He was previously dedicated to another game and only played League casually, but when you were released as a new champion, Kayn made the switch to focus on League. Your abilities just worked so well with his playstyle, give it enough time for him to perfect his skills and he could tell that he would be able to 1v5 the entire enemy team with you

After many months, Kayn's now known as a dedicated (Y/N) one-trick pony. If he streams or has a YouTube channel he's probably going to hold the title for the best (Y/N)-player in the region. Every kill and outplay he's flexing his Level 7 mastery and eternals

If you get banned, Kayn is straight up dodging, he doesn't care how long the wait time for the next game will be. Does he get autofilled into a role you're not made for? No problem, change the runes and itemisation and he's all good to play you

The only times he’s not playing you is if it’s a special game mode (like ARAM or One for All) or if he’s playing with friends and trying dumb strategies. But even then you can bet he’ll be thinking how much easier his game would be if he just selected you

If the enemy team has you in their composition, he’ll be a complete savage and tear the enemy apart on their lack of technique with you. He can see all the mistakes and errors, only solidifying how he’s the best (Y/N) player

Kayn never really took much interest in the lore of League but once you were released, he checked it out. He thinks the entire lore is too convoluted to follow as a whole but he’s keeping tabs on anything you’re involved in. He'll never admit it but he isn't particularly happy if you have a significant other in lore

He has bought all your skins and chromas. Even the legacy and hextech skins he's spent his money to get his hands on one way or another. Despite this, he actually likes playing with your default skin sometimes. It expresses your lore and personality best and it also makes him feel nostalgic

Kayn couldn't care less if people flame him personally but if anyone flames you as a “dumb” or “brainless champ” then to Kayn they've pretty much asked for death. He can be extremely savage and toxic if he wants to be, it's almost like he's another person. If his account gets banned, he doesn't care. He'll just start a new one. He’s defended you and that’s what matters

Yone

Yone is like an old man with technology. He would only play League casually but he's quite passionate about all the theory and techniques involved in the game. He knows all the concepts and what all the champions can do but he just can't seem to connect his mind and fingers so he ends up as a rather average League player

That all changed when he tried to play you, however. Even though you weren't the easiest champion to play, you were the easiest to understand to him. Whenever he played you, he was able to display just how much knowledge he had of the game and his win rate soared. It took some time but you were the first – and only – champion he has a Mastery 7 on

Yone appreciates all the content relating to you as it was clear how much time and effort was put into your design, gameplay and lore. Your biography in Runeterra is extremely entertaining, your splash art is phenomenal with lots of hidden symbolism and foreshadowing to your lore and your voice lines in-game compliment your personality perfectly. He also goes out of his way to listen to your cinematic theme song, it's absolutely beautiful to him

You are by far Yone's favourite champ to listen to. While all the other champions trash talk and roast their enemies, you were respectful but confident when up against the enemy team, but could be savage if you witnessed any injustice, much like Yone's attitude when he plays League

When you were a part of the Spirit Blossom event (or if you have a skin with a similar aesthetic to it), Yone’s heart raced when he first laid his eyes on your splash heart. He had a complete internal panic, he’s never felt this way for a game character before, was this normal? If you were also part of Spirit Blossom’s dating sim or something similar, Yone would act as though he is completely unphased by the event, playing your route with a straight face (but his cheeks burning red)

The instant he heard of Yone's fondness of you, Yasuo gifted him with an official figurine of you. It was rather embarrassing and Yone keeps it away from prying eyes, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't like it

Your characterisation is so expertly done, it makes you so realistic and Yone can't help but let his mind wander sometimes and imagine what life would be like if you were real. You'd undoubtedly be good friends, perhaps even more, he’ll never truly know