#if it's because i complain about the posts i complain at the fact i got 170 notifications in less than an hour
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The irony of you saying I have bad reading comprehension is *chef's kiss*.
"...nor was I giving an answer with personal trauma"
I never said you did. I said that you were pushing me to give a more in-depth answer that involves MY personal cultural trauma because my original answer wasn't "valid" enough for you.
"I didn't claim to be a victim, I claimed to be annoyed"
Oh, but you did. Not explicitly, but implicitly. Maybe you need to read up on how subtext works.
Because complaining that non-Christians are to blame for watering down your religion instead of the Christians who push it on non-Christians IS playing the victim.
What you were saying in your response was basically "Oh, us poor innocent Christians were just minding our business when these mean non-Christians came along and appropriated our religion out of nowhere against our wishes uwu" when in reality everyone else was minding their own business and y'all insisted we observe your holidays or else.
If non-Christians celebrating Christmas is "watering down" your religion then Christians are to blame for forcing everyone else to participate.
"I claimed to be confused"
Which was why I politely answered your question, leading to you having a meltdown because you didn't like the answer.
"I wasn't being a bigot..."
Reeeeally?
Telling people who your religion forces to celebrate your religion that we're at fault for "watering down" your religion's celebration isn't being a bigot?
Telling a minority person that their experience isn't valid simply because you don't like it isn't bigotry?
Telling someone that their perfectly polite response about a question YOU asked is "acting like a toddler" for making the point that y'all push Christmas celebration on everyone every damn year in a post that had nothing to do with you isn't being a whining bigot?
*snorts*
"...you seem to think that Christians as a whole are responsible for the commercialization of Christmas..."
No, I don't. Saying that it was Christians who commercialized Christmas is a factual statement, because the capitalists who started commercializing it weren't Sikhs or Muslims or Jews or even atheists. They were Christians. And in a way non-capitalist Christians DID play a part in commercializing the holiday, because
a) they bought the commercialized things, thus signalling with their wallets that they wanted more of the commercialized things
b) they pushed (and continue to push) Christmas down the throats of non-Christians every damn year
"I claimed to be hurt by how capitalism has stripped my faith of its holiness and injected it with consumerism."
Aaand implied that that was non-Christians' fault instead of pointing to Christian capitalists and Christians who bought into the commercialization of the holiday.
"...also you think that Christian’s ‘stole’ pages traditions..."
No, it's called syncretization. It's a well-established fact in academia that Christianity constantly "borrowed" from Pagan religions in order to make conversion easier to stomach for Pagans. Take an unbiased class in religious history, I'm begging.
"...when in actuality pagans and Christian’s coexisted in Europe..."
They didn't coexist like you're implying. Coexistence in the sense you're using is peacefully existing at the same time and in a proximity close enough to affect each other without causing harm to one another. You're implying that they got along and converts would convert without pressure to do so. Christianity persecuted the other religions, it didn't coexist with them.
The one exception is what is now Scandinavia, where there was a council on whether the people should convert. According to my Norse Mythology & Culture professor, it's more or less the only known relatively peaceful mass conversion into Christianity that we know of.
"I DID NOT DO THAT, you are taking out your (valid) pain, and frustration of particular christians, on me, when I did not do that to you."
You're once again missing the point in favour of acting like the persecuted victim.
The point is not that you personally slaughtered Indigenous people. The point is that Christians can't complain that non-Christians are "ruining Christmas" when it was Christians who forced us to participate.
You're victim-blaming persecuted minorities instead of pointing the finger at the real culprits (Christians who pushed [and continue to push] Christianity onto nonbelievers).
"I have experienced religious celebrations in a secular capacity, and I no longer do..."
And yet you act like only Christian holidays are celebrated by non-members of the religion.
Shows how intellectually dishonest you are.
"...because there is no fucking reason if i don't believe in it."
Just because YOU don't see any value in having fun with your loved ones if Jesus isn't involved doesn't mean that applies to everyone else.
"...and you do celebrate non christian holidays secularly.... why?"
Ready to have another meltdown?
Because holidays are fun, and often involve having fun with your loved ones or even complete strangers.
Because experiencing other cultures and traditions is interesting and fun.
I hate to say it but I do fear we need to take Christmas away from non-Christians.
‘Secular Christmas’ babes that’s just capitalism…
#christian persecution complex#christianity#religion#abrahamic religions#merry christmas#xmas#merry xmas#christmas#atheism#it's not that deep
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Anyway back to Lily. She has helpfully given me another opportunity to give you a preview of what the Dragon Age stream will be like. Finish Inquisition and make your terrible 3rd video already Lily. I finished it in a month doing only 2 streams a week, including The Descent and Trespasser DLCs (and most of Hakkon, I never beat that dragon tho lol.)
[Lily's Post]
Dragon Age: Origins - Lily you played the City Elf origin. You got extra elf ghetto content. Did you miss the entire main story subplot of Loghain allowing Tevinter slavers to kidnap elves from Denerim's alienage under the guise of quarantining people due to a plague? Were you and your wife too busy talking about pointless bullshit over cutscenes to pay attention? Or did you just spacebar hammer your way through? Did you even finish the game?
Dragon Age 2 - Lily you managed to play almost the entire series without realizing the Templars are an arm of the Chantry. That they're a monastic-like order that people are typically recruited into as children. That the Chantry keeps control of them with the lyrium dust that also fuels their magic cancelling powers and will eventually addle their senses like mercury poisoning.
If you think Tranquility is "brainwashing" then... you REALLY weren't paying attention. Making mages that have passed their Harrowing into a Tranquil is actually against Chantry law. Kirkwall's Circle was doing it illegally because it's one of the worst Circles in one of the most violent cities and their Knight-Commander was going insane under the influence of red lyrium. That's not every Circle in the world. No matter what Anders says.
Speaking of Anders... you did finish the game right? You seem to be completely ignoring what was the inciting incident for the conflict boiling over at the end. Don't make me cheat and peek at your video ahead of time, I like reacting to videos blind.
Dragon Age: Inquisition - What the fuck are you even talking about? If you mean the Exalted March on Halamshiral that happened centuries ago in canon. In fact there's so many elves in Halamshiral its more like the entire city is an alienage and the humans wall themselves off.
Or else you're talking about devout Andrastians like Cassandra poking at a Dalish elf about believing in the Maker? Cause only the Dalish aren't Andrastian you know. Most City Elves are. Skill issue either way, my very fiercely Dalish Inquisitor made friends with her. My Quiz didn't even let her stupid egg boyfriend remove her vallaslin.
You haven't even finished the game yet. Of course that hasn't stopped you from writing your script as you go along. And you're clearly not paying attention to the plot if that's your only take away.
Dragon Age: The Veilguard - Yeah Lily every single critic and fan is complaining about the sanitization of the world in Veilguard because it was cobbled from a disastrous idea of making an MMO out of the series after they cancelled development of a fourth game twice already. It's a miracle we got fucking anything.
I won't pretend I didn't enjoy having every single one of my lore theories validated. And being surprised by a few lore reveals I didn't even see coming. I still enjoyed seeing cities in the north of Thedas we'd only ever heard of. I was very happy to see the Grand Necropolis. Also Emmrich is best girl, best new character in the entire series, 10/10 no complaints, I love Mr. Rogers Vincent Prince.
Dat combat system is still amazing though. Too bad it came at the expense of the writing this time.
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lesbian masterdoc and the unforgivable damage of making people hear compulsory heterosexuality and think of "can lesbians have crushes on men?" (no) instead of "are heterosexual women settling in unhappy marriages with men bellow their worth because of economic and social pressure?" (yes)
#not claiming the theory was without flaws but it sure didn't describe some virus mental affliction that exclusively plagues lesbians#for starters the theory was primarily about marriage. so it did recognise the historical fact of lesbians forced into marriage to avoid#honor killings and the still present possibility and threats especially when it comes to cults and strong religions#(once again mentioning as a Jeová's witness in a brazilian periphery my girlfriend accepted the tool of losing her entire family and social#circles to reject an arranged marriage at the age of 17. and she's bisexual. but THAT is what compulsory heterosexuality alludes to)#but more often than not when it addressed lesbians it was as the inherent threat they pose to heteropatriarchy#that they mere existence proved women were not all born to serve men. and that their lives often proved women are much happier and#accomplished when away from the burden of men.#and this acknowledging just how much loneliness was a reality through lesbian's experiences#at the same time I can understand the frustration of that feminist theory being reduced to 'comphet is when lesbians in high school were#pressured into picking one of the Backstreet Boys to lie about finding attractive'. and even more so when that non universal and much less#serious example somehow morphed into 'comphet is when bisexual women either lying or confused about being lesbians have sex with men and#find it unfulfilling' because accepting that narrative erases and harms lesbians#so I understand the 'comphet isn't real' posts especially because written like that it tends to refer to lesbian masterdoc and following#fiasco. but at the same time that wasn't the original intent of compulsory heterosexuality the actual feminist term#this is just me complaining about how social media butchers theory tho unless they are specifically naming Rich and the many other feminist#who wrote about heterosexual marriage as an institution I won't bother lesbians for venting frustration about neoliberal erasure of lesbian#the original theory sure didn't claim lesbians were immune to all this misogynistic violence but the term was never exclusively about them#and tended to ask more of 'where do we stand as women and feminists as a group much more interested in destroying heterosexual marriage than#simply making it more bearable?'#this got a little messy and senseless I'm tired#.txt
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I swear why are half the things i like/fandoms im in made of mostly younger people while the other half are mostly older people? what are the zoggin odds with that?
How it feels being 20 in a fandom with a bunch of 30-40 somethings.
VS how it feels being 20 in a fandom with a bunch of 14-17 somethings.
like am do i just have extremely odd luck with things i like or is this just what being 20 is like?
#I go browse homestuck twitter and find out an artist I like is turning 16. I go to warhammer twitter and see a meme poster I enjoy is almost#three times my age.#like how do you get a person to somehow feel too old to be in a one fandom yet too young to be in the another?#i know this sounds stupid but it happens every time i like something#world of warcraft has people who have been playing this game for as long as i have been alive#despite aging with the game minecraft is primarily youngsters#team fortress 2 is somehow both too young and too old a fanbase#i've long since reconciled with the fact pretty much everything i like is over a decade old but why cant i just like something with a ->#similar age base? like it would be nice to interact with people that like similar things i like on a consistent basis.#I don't want to buzz around my 2 friends ears trying to not talk too much about my interests. Don't get me wrong I love those two gits but-#its not like i can complain about those childish gits who kept blocking the good fishing nodes in world of warcraft#I cant share my homestuck art and make references to characters that they don't know#I like making references! references make up roughly 1/3rd my jokes! Heck they make up my zogging dialogue too!#HECK I SAY ZOG AND GIT BECAUSE I AM A BLOODY STUPID MIMIC! I'M NOT EVEN BRITISH I LIVE IN MASSACHUSETTS!#YET EVERY TIME I GET A NEW “main interest” OR WHATEVER I END UP TAKING IN ZOGGIN SPEECH PATTERNS FROM THE DANG THINGS!#I ONCE MUTTERED “merde” WHEN THINGS WENT WRONG FOR LIKE OVER A YEAR BECAUSE SPY SAID IT AND ONLY STOPPED WHEN MY BILINGUAL AND FRENCH TAKIN#FATHER AND BROTHER RESPECTIVELY TOLD ME IT MEANT SHIT#I SAY “SLAPS ME ON THE KNEE” AND “SUCKS ON ICE” BECAUSE OF A MAIN INTEREST!#MY POSTURE GOT BETTER SOLELY BECAUSE I DID NOTHING BUT LEVEL A ZANDALARI HUNTER UNTIL LEVEL 120.#WHEN LAUGHING A MODERATE AMOUNT I DO THE /LOL ORC EMOTE. WHEN CHUCKLING I PUT MY HAND ON MY MOUTH LIKE SHIVER FROM SPLATOON BLOODY 3!!!#I HAVE BEEN UNINTENTIONALLY MIMICKING THINGS I LIKE FOR YEARS! I BOB MY HEAD AND WALK DIGITIGRADE BECAUSE I HEARD BIRDS/DINOSAURS DO IT TO-#BALANCE WHEN WALKING. AND THE ONLY REASON I SUCKED AT RUNNING WAS BECAUSE WHEN I WAS YOUNGER I WATCHED A SCENE OF ICE AGE WHERE SID WAS WAL#ING AND MIMICKED HOW HE WALKED FOOT -> FOOT INSTEAD OF HEEL -> TOE HEEL -> TOE#AND NOW I GUESS I'M JUST WAITING FOR WHAT ILL GET FROM HOMESTUCK HUH#ugh if you can't tell this is a midnight brainrot post. i may be awake and on my computer but this still has the energy of that kind of pos#saturday warhammer and the following wendys browsing for ya folks.#midnight brainrot#Man i needed to get those off my chest#not like anyone reads these midnight brainrot posts anyways#oh yeah gotta tag art and paint.net so i can easily find these drawings later if i need them
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There is nothing worse than being into a objectively niche series but it still has one part of the franchise thats considered popular at its peak and amongst its dedicated fanbase so it’s the best iteration to probably direct people towards-
Until you remember you’ve experienced most of the franchise and there’s other parts that are objectively better not only in beginner friendliness but also writing but you can’t recommend people it so easily because it’s the part that isn’t talked about enough even if it has its fans.
And the fact this happened to me twice makes me even sadder about it 💀
#meg text#Yes I’m vaguing about getter robo because what the fuck else would I be mentioning#I’m not tagging even if this post probably wouldn’t reach anywhere lol I’m just a awful tumblr user#But this is the feeling I’m being hit with because I have so much New getter brain rot all of a sudden#And most of the people I got Getter into was through arma and now I’m regretting it#I don’t like the getter series debate order because it really doesn’t matter outside of manga#and arma got me fully invested into the series#but damn if new doesn’t feel like it gets enough love and is a great starting place#this is mostly forming out of the fact I’m writing a new fic and none of my buds are reading it 💀#it’s still getting views so I can’t complain but man#I literally had one irl watch it with me so far and we aren’t even done#Also the second one was mega man but people would argue ZX isn’t a good starting point so
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idk if this is smt you already know but a tip I heard regarding what to do with your chest when binding is to push down on them, like try to gather all the fat from under your arms and whatnot and push it downwards against the binder, not upwards . I think it helps avoid damage although I can't remember if it also helps it look more natural? the not being able to bind comfortably thing sounds like it rly sucks though :(
yeah, I've seen tips for all kinds of different bound-chest distribution though, and none of them seem to do anything except look weird -- pushing down, up, not moving anything around, etc. because a lot of tips are for people who could probably already bind with a good enough sports bra :(
I deleted that reblog because OP was in the comments saying they wished the post hadn't blown up since it was from 2018 and badly written and they'd made a blog trying to find a safer way to bind for all sizes since then
(like, it was irking me the way they were like "trans guys accept pain because they're told binding should hurt" as if having a chest larger than a C doesn't inherently hurt no matter what you do. just standing up long enough to do the dishes or sweep a single room, whether supported or not, has a 30% chance of making my back hurt so bad I have to lie down after.) but yeah, it sucks a lot fksjhfkjsdf 😭😭😭
#like I KNOW corsets are actually very supportive for a wide variety of body types and historical drama actors who complain#about them are just being very badly fitted into them. but like. man I'm not an actor on a movie with a $1.2 billion budget#I'm one guy who's just gotten his first decent paying job ever#and I could probably afford a decent corset but it still doesn't address the fact that I live in a desert that's become as humid as#florida/the literal tropics recently#none of which is anyone's fault but it makes me really sad and cranky because I keep getting 'ma'am'-ed at work (by adults)#I feel like mike from that one post. mike who got top surgery for his f cups. I want to be like that mike. :(
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howwwwww did the class sections i need get filled completely up when registration isn't even open yet. like. girl. what. OKAYYYY THIS IS FINE WHATEVERRRRRR
#should be interesting trying to negotiate my availability at work. i'm already looking at remote internships that pay better anyway#i have to have an internship ANYWAY because i have got to get. my fucking foot in the door somehow. the fact that a lot of them are remote#and have flexible hours and pay almost $10/hr more than what i'm making rn are just bonuses#LIKE I DON'T FORSEE THERE BEING A PROBLEM TRYING TO CHANGE MY AVAILABILITY?? BECAUSE I'M ONE OF THE ONLY COMPETENT PEOPLE IN MY DEPARTMENT#AND THEY'RE VERY AWARE OF THAT??? BUT WORKING IN-PERSON WHILE TRYING TO ALSO HANDLE THE HEAVY ASS WORKLOAD I'M GONNA HAVE IN MY CLASSES#(WHICH IS LIKE. CALCULUS I. DISCRETE MATH 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO. COMPSCI 2. AND TWO OTHER CLASSES (EASY))#HOO BOY. AND I /NEED/ INTERNSHIPS ANYWAY.#i need to go complain about this in a giant blog post on my dreamwidth actually tumblr tags aren't good enough at this point
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there’s no way Carlos just got hit with a penalty dropping him to P6 i am actually currently throwing myself off a cliff what the actual fuck
what the fuck
remember that post i made in february where i was like ‘haha bought merch again will not be revealing for who bc last time i bought merch for drivers they either retired or got fired in the same season’
it was fucking sainz merch.
#nah this has proper ruined my night#ridiculousness#how has he gotten a second penalty without being given another warning#and Perez got a black and white flag but apparently kept it in for the remaining 15 laps????#even Lando was off so much i was scared he’d get hit with a post race one#nah this is ridiculous they need to get this shit under control because 8 drivers being hit with POST race penalties is insane#i love austria but this is yucky#yes i am complaining and don’t care about the fact in my book he did NOT deserve this
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my body doesn’t Hate me, per se. It just Loves being an annoying little shit
#my post#i feel a little bad about complaining about it sometimes#because it’s not like i have super serious afflictions#and we’ve gotten some handled through this or that#but. i’ve just got. such an extensive collection of#‘‘bodily things that would be fine individually albeit annoying; but i’ve got all of them so it makes for a frustrating existence’’#subacute eczema. the worst of the bunch. only on my hands but very itchy and still eczema#scapular winging or whatever they call it when you can pop out your scapulas at will.#not very bad at all. the least offensive. just aches sometimes and makes me worry#some tinnitus. a tad annoying. i hear it most when it’s quiet or i’m inside. sometimes it flares but not often. tuning it out isn’t too har#chronic rhinitis. i got some surgery(?) for this one. lotta nose sprays.#my nose is almost always congested and runny and going anywhere without tissues is dangerous.#dry lips. also not altogether that bad it’s just annoying and it gets cracked and sometimes painful to open my mouth too wide ig.#we manage that one well with whatever lip products my sister gave me. it’s not very bad#dandruff? maybe? is it dandruff or just scalp skin? i got no clue man#and you’re like. ‘‘okay you’re right those are all quite annoying. but is it really that bad?’’#and i’m like ‘‘No. but have you Considered that i have to deal with them all at Once?’’#BUT THAT. ISN’T EVEN IT. ‘CAUSE IT’D BE ONE THING IF MY BODY WAS JUST BUILT LIKE THAT. BUT MY BRAIN HATES ME TOO.#BOOM. dermatillomania!! i pick at my acne a little. under my nails. the hard skin under my nails.#my scalp! until it’s itchy and there’s a little bit of blood! i gently pull at my eyelashes a little bit and rub my eyes.#and. get this. dry and flaky bits of skin. GUESS WHERE I HAVE FLAKY BITS OF SKIN. OH THAT’S RIGHT: THE SUBACUTE ECZEMA ON MY HANDS.#it’s better now it really is but i have spent hours picking at it after i’m already all set for bed. 2-3 hrs over a trash can picking at it#‘‘yeah okay that’s bad. but-’’ BOOM. ADHD or at least fidgeting. i fidget most by picking at idk All of the aforementioned.#‘‘oof yeah that does actually suck-’’ BOOM. OCD!!! now that one is the REAL kicker that one fucking hates me#just take all of the above and assume i have some vaguely annoying compulsion tied to it.#and it wouldn’t be so annoying sometimes if it weren’t for the fact that i deal with it all every day kind of#so correction: my body doesn't necessarily hate me it’s just that my body has shaken hands made deals about which exact disorders and bodil#irritations i need to collectively make living incredibly annoying.#thank you for coming to my TED talk. cue the world’s smallest violin or whatever
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Can’t have SHIT in a small town
#participated in this community knitting and crochet project because idk it seemed like a nice thing to do and the time will pass anyways#but oh my GOD#the project’s done now and some of the other participants have been so WEIRD about the fact that only the organiser was credited#on social media. mind you no one even said ‘the organiser did all of this’. just ‘the organiser ORGANISED this’#the organiser came crying to me asking me to post a list of names of people who participated#which i did do#but i can’t work out who this person is that got so stressed about credit#we didn’t get paid for this; she’s not losing out on pay of any kind. she was given yarn and a pattern and no obligation to make anything#what REALLY gets me is this person that’s complained apparently doesn’t even have social media?#so somebody else must’ve seen it and incorrectly told her that the organiser’s claiming all credit???#ORGANISED. ORGANISED. not MADE. not DID ALL THIS. ORGANISED the community project#i think there are some people out here who are pedantic and petty and just want to watch the world burn. what a sad little life jane#personal
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At least all of the intense overthinking and hyperanalysis of my every thought has made me self aware. Right guys. At least I know I'm the problem
#like. does it help at all?#no#and in fact makes me more annoying because im always posting self deprecating shit that makes#people like me less. but at least i know im doing it on purpose to drive people away#and definitely not because im seeking some sort of validation that i know will only#trigger a more intense mental health episode than simply shutting up and wallowing in it#and im aware of it all.#which is good. right.#i actually started writing this post with some other flaw in mind but i got sidetracked and now i dont remember#what i was originally going to complain about.#but either way. at least im aware of it.
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There is this girl I went to hs with and the nicest way I can say this is this girl was smart but not particularly so, and had a high sense of self despite being remarkably average. Again, that's the nicest way I can say that. She also got very triggered whenever I was better at her than something (in all fairness, she was like that with anyone better than her, but my friend caught her shit talking me once when I was the only person in my English class to get an A on my Catcher in the Rye essay--something I expected simply because I'm a writer, was then, and I never once got anything less than A on an essay my entire hs career--and that pissed me off particularly because my writing is the ONE thing in this world I can truly say I do better than most people).
Anyway, I learned a while ago that she moved to Boston, and she was associated with Harvard in some way. Without getting too into it, she works there in the weirdest and most random department (not as a professor or anything meaningful or prestigious, which will make sense in a second), doing basically admin shit it seems. I was curious because she's still listed on their site and it says she's been there for like eleven years. I was wondering if she ended up going there as a student in something, but without a linkden or something, I couldn't see. But every time I googled her name and the school, the only thing that came up was her staffing position. No information to indicate she was a student.
Which is funny. I looked up to see if you can go to Harvard for free if you work there, and the do have a reimbursement program, but you'd only get like 75% of fees back, so you'd still have to come out of pocket. And this is an IVY, so that's going to be pretty. And considering what she does, I can't imagine it paying that much where she could easily afford it. Maybe she does take classes and is slowly working her way to some kinda degree, but I doubt it. I feel like she'd at least be able to brag by now given how long she's been there (the site fucking says when she started lol).
Either way, the reason this is funny to me is because she was never even close or talented or impressive enough to anyone let alone college admissions to get into a school like Harvard (I know for a fact she didn't get in in hs lol), and transferring into schools is typically easier, she didn't get her degrees from there according to the site. So I just lowkey find it funny because the closest she'd ever get to Harvard is not as a student or even as someone brought in to teach, but by getting some admin job and sticking around long enough to get her picture on the school's site. She looks so proud in her Harvard shirt, thinking she finally "made it" but never in a way that would actually impress everyone.
It just all feels very fitting for her. In the right spaces to be around more impressive people while being overwhelmingly mediocre her own damn self lol.
#also her last name hasn't changed#meaning she isn't married#and that's also funny not because i value women being married#but like if you knew her in hs and the way she sought out male validation#which was made even more awkward by the fact that no one in our school wanted to date/fuck her#like i graduated a virgin because i was a closeted lesbian and also genuinely wasnt interested in dating in hs#but she graduated a virgin and let's just say it wasn't for lack of trying lol#I also know she never got married because I used to work with her aunt until last year#and the few times i'd ask about her niece to be nice she just said she's working hard up in Boston lol#anyway knowing she didn't have the after hs glow up i'm sure she imagined just is nice#this post is very meanspirited but y'all don't understand what a literal menace this girl was#i didn't even like her and tried my damndest not to be around her but i couldn't always help it#like the essay situation pisses me off because i remember it so vividly too#my teacher was walking around handing them back while we talked a bit and i was talking to my friend and she sat on my friend's other side#because she had no friends herself to sit with of course#and the teacher gave the essays back face down and i remember lifting the top to see the A#frowning because it was a 98 and not a 100% which I didn't accept on my essays back them#did I mention i was/am a perfectionist? lol#anyway i saw the grade and guess i frowned but kept talking to my friend but this bitch saw my face and interrupted me asking what i got#i really didn't want to show her because i was never competing against her despite her always thinking we were#but i showed her and then went on with what i was talking about and it wasn't until everyone else got their essays back#and i heard my classmates complain that i realized no one else got an A on the essay but me lol#i def wasn't telling anyone else i got an A because i didn't feel like dealing with their shit; the AP/honors kids werent my friends too lo#and they were already starting this narrative that the only way to get an A was to write an essay agreeing with everything our teacher said#about the book#and i didn't have the heart to tell them all that I wrote my essay literally shitting on every theme and deep moment our teacher pushed#my entire essay was 'holden is a spoiled brat who has too much money and doesn't respect girls' lol#and that essay got an A so idk what they were on about#i also made a point to argue that the story wasn't deep at all but a spoiled rich kid with depression making it everyone else's problem#and the red cap WASN'T DEEP AND DOESN'T SIGNIFY DEATH OR WHATEVER
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sincerely curious what that spn video got wrong, i watched it and it was pretty obvious she was a longtime supernatural fan. what details were inaccurate? /gen
what i was specifically talking about is that there’s a book (Ship It) based on an incident that happened at a supernatural convention, written by someone who was a writer on riverdale, and i often see people mention it and claim that the book led to her getting the job on riverdale, but in actuality she was already a working on the show when the book was published. and when people say this they say they learned about it from a sarah z video. personally i have no idea whether this was mentioned in a spn video or something else entirely bc i haven’t watched her stuff in a long time
like i said in the tags though i’m not sure if i ever ACTUALLY watched her spn video… i don’t think i did but it’s possible i did and forgot the details. sometimes i watch her stuff out of curiosity but i am really just not a fan of her videos and that one came out during a huge wave of people just sort of parroting what they’d heard about the episode and taking jokes as facts (the main one being. superhell itself. which is not what the empty is), often from people who used to love the show but had since quit and simply didn’t have the context for what actually happened (i may have a biiiiit of a complex about this because even though i did quit during season 10 i caught up before s15 came out and watched most of it live)
so given my existing dislike for sarah z i just kind of assumed that would be the vibe, and i don’t think i ever watched it to find out bc i was so sick of ppl who hadn’t even watched the episode much less the final season chiming in to “explain” it. i don’t know if that accurately describes her but i was just sick of the whole thing lmao
#so yeah i truly cannot tell you if she got anything wrong i was just being bitchy in a post bc i don’t like her stuff 😭#was not trying to make a sweeping statement or even say she’s horrible and you shouldn’t watch her or whatever. just complaining you know#but it was the wild west after that episode came out everyone was playing telephone and claiming that jokes were facts#if you ever saw anyone say they didn’t tell jensen what was happening in the scene#that’s because of a joke my friend made on a post about how awkwardly cut the scene was#like people WERE going around saying that. and all she said was what if they didn’t even tell jensen lmao#r.txt
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round & round! ★ [ l.dh ]
{💭} hyuck : i suggested playing spin the bottle because i wanted to kiss you, but now everyone’s kissing you except me :/
[☆] pairing. haechan x reader, slight jaemin x reader ft. 00’ line, chaewon of lesserafim and sieun of stayc
[☆] genre. smut + fluff | stoner!nct, pwp bc it’s me
[☆] wc. 6.1k
[☆] warnings. explicit content (mdni), weed/marijuana use, lots of making out, slight choking, dirty talk, fingering, sexual stuff in a semi-public place, use of the word ‘slut’, very slight degradation, not very proofread, pretty tame tbh
[☆] notes. my first time writing again in like??? two years???? istg i didn’t mean to abandon this acc 😞 pls be nice i haven’t written in a while and this is not my most favourite work but i’m warming up for more stuff in da future i just wanted to post a lil self-indulgent smth abt hyuck bc bf☝️ idk how active i’ll be because of uni and other things but i missed u guys!!! any feedback is appreciated enjoy :p
even through the clouds of smoke engulfing the little living room of jeno and jaemin’s shared flat, your hooded eyes still met.
today was an important day amongst your friend group; it was chaewon’s first time smoking up with everyone. your friends weren’t really the type to pressure anyone into doing anything they weren’t sure about, but considering the astounding majority who enjoyed smoking some variation of weed, group sessions were a frequent occurrence. you either joined in or didn’t, chaewon being the latter until she decided of her own accord that she was going to try it with the people she trusted.
you sesh with jeno most often, seeing as he was the one who introduced you to weed and taught you everything you know about it. after weeks of listening to you complain about sleepless nights, jeno suggested you try smoking a joint before you go to bed, especially since it was starting to affect your attendance. (“i can’t keep attending these zoology classes without you, y/n. every time something stupid happens, i laugh and make a joke out loud because i forget you aren’t there, and now i’m pretty sure people think i’m either insane or just really fucking lonely”.)
now, smoking up has been a pretty regular occurrence, especially since jeno introduced you to a bunch of his friends and vice versa, all of you making up one big, happy group of stoners. chaewon and sieun were your friends who got along with everyone else just fine, and though they didn’t hang out with the others as much as you did, they were still welcome whenever.
presently, you are leaning back against the couch, all the way on the end, because jaemin is sprawled out alongside you, opting to rest his legs on your lap. haechan makes a joke that you don’t understand, but you laugh anyway along with everyone else, except renjun who covers up his laugh with cough.
“you can never let me have it, huh?”, hyuck scoffs, narrowing his eyes at renjun who’s mouth forms a thin line. “i know for a fact you find me funny.”
you hear that he makes a remark back at haechan but what he says doesn’t register in your head, everything sounding far away. remembering the special occasion, you turn to face chaewon and sieun, who are giggling away on the floor about something between the two of them. you don’t know what they said but you smile anyway. she clearly seemed like she was having a good trip, and so was everyone else.
swallowing nothing, you realise how dry your throat feels, and with that realisation came this undeniable desire for some form of liquid. “jen,”, you tilt your head back and call out to the boy who was already rolling another joint on the table behind you. “did you end up buying more coke?”
“check the fridge”, he mumbles without looking at you, tongue poking his cheek out of concentration as he focuses on what he was doing. with a groan, you heave jaemin’s legs off your lap, muttering a couple ‘sorry’s when he starts to complain about the change in position.
you all but float to the kitchen, heading straight for the fridge and spotting the fresh cans of coke placed neatly in the overcrowded appliance. the first gulp feels like heaven against your parched throat, taking a few more while standing there.
“you gonna share or no?”, a voice startles you, turning to find haechan’s figure looming right behind you with a dopey smile on his face.
“god, we need to get you a bell or something. i never hear you coming”, you roll your eyes before grabbing two glasses from the cabinet. you’re disappointed to see that there was no ice in their freezer, but you pour the drink into the glass anyway.
“why are you pouring it into a glass?”, haechan furrows his eyebrows, looking pointedly between the glass and the literal can in your hand. “now we have to wash two glasses when we could’ve just drank it from the can.”
he’s right, of course, but you’re not gonna tell him that. instead, you pretend that you were planning on adding some lemon juice to the drink because you saw it on instagram. while you figure he doesn’t believe you, he humours you anyway and tries your little concoction, which ends up being pretty damn good.
out of all of jeno’s friends, haechan definitely stood out to you. you didn’t really understand why, you were just drawn to him, even way back before you met him, when jeno used to tell you about his friends. “loud and annoying” were the words he used to describe him, but the smile that appeared on his face anyway let you know that he was someone special to jeno. this was not to say his other friends weren’t special, you got along incredibly well with all of them, meshing right in with their group.
as of right on cue, jaemin’s voice loudly sounds out from the living room, “are you guys fucking in there or what?”.
sighing, you pick up your glass and begin to walk out of the kitchen, but not before purposely knocking haechan’s shoulder when you walk past him, hearing him snort before following you out as you exit the room. perhaps if you had lingered in the kitchen for a couple seconds longer, you would’ve heard haechan muttering something along the lines of “i wish” under his breath.
“jeez, took you long enough, can i have some of that?”, renjun drawls, lifting himself off the armchair with a smile, to which you roll your eyes but pass him your glass anyway. you sit down on the floor opposite the couch and he looks as if he is about to compliment your drink-making skills before haechan cuts him off.
“dude, chaewon and sieun look like they’re about to fall asleep, let’s do something”, he half yawns out, opting to stroll over to your spot on the floor and sinking down next to you.
“not…sleepy…”, chaewon murmurs, but her voice is muffled because her cheek is pressed against sieun’s shoulder, both of them sprawled out on the floor like it was a comfortable bed.
“sure you aren’t…”, jeno chides with a smile, getting up from the table to walk over to where all of you were situated. he twirls his newly rolled joint between his fingers, finally holding it out in his palm as if it were some magical gadget, and if you were being fully honest, you were sold. “round 2? or 3, I can’t really remember…”
some words of agreement were muttered across the room, chaewon and sieun even groggily getting up from what looked like a very comfortable napping spot. another rotation began, and you made sure to blow out your smoke directly into an unsuspecting haechan’s face when it was your turn.
“let’s play a game or something”, jaemin suggests, taking a long puff and passing it to jeno who sat beside him, and soon the room was hazy once again, the smell of weed infiltrating your nostrils.
“like what?”, chaewon coughs weakly in between her hit and renjun pats her back before he hands her your coke that you hadn’t received back after you gave it to him. so long for that.
“monopoly?”, jeno offers with a shrug and haechan lets out an obnoxious snore as a reply, making you laugh but you cover it up with a cough when you meet jeno’s playfully narrowed eyes. “okay then, big guy, what’s your incredible idea?”
haechan appears to actually think about it for a moment, looking around the room for some sort of inspiration maybe, until his eyes land on you.
“okay jaemin, get that empty wine bottle from last week, we’re playing spin the bottle”, he is grinning from ear to ear, wiggling his eyebrows even though all his suggestion receives is a bunch of groans and sighs.
your eyebrows are raised however, and you try not to let your reaction show too much on your face. spin the bottle? you hadn’t played that since you were maybe fourteen, but that was the least of your concerns at the moment. haechan wanted to play spin the bottle? who was he hoping to kiss? or was it just a whimsical little suggestion that was more of a joke?
it didn’t fully seem like he meant it as a joke, judging by his expression as he awaited some actual responses from the group. “what are we, fourteen?”, renjun might as well have read your mind, but he soon joins you and haechan on the floor, the others following suit. jaemin presents the empty bottle and places it in the middle of the little circle you have formed, everyone seeming slightly more keen as the joint runs out.
maybe it was the thc talking, but it didn’t really seem like a bad idea to you anymore. you were all single, attractive and close enough that it wouldn’t make things weird, and most importantly, you wouldn’t mind getting more familiar with haechan’s lips.
you shocked your own self with the sudden lewd thoughts in your head about the male sitting next to you, squirming in your position slightly. he turns his head towards you like he could hear your thoughts (“shut up, y/n, he can’t hear your thoughts…right?”) and you swear his eyes soften a bit. “are you sure you wanna play?”, he asks softly, mistaking your tenseness for discomfort, but you shake your head a little too quickly for your liking.
“no, no, let’s play, it’s not like we have anything better to do, right?”, you feign indifference and after everyone else agrees, the bottle is spun for the first time by haechan.
much to renjun’s dismay, it lands on him, and it’s almost comical the way he looks at the bottle pointing at him before slowly looking up at haechan. “renjunnie, let me kiss you”, haechan whines in a high pitched tone while drawing out the “you”, puckering his lips expectantly. the next three minutes consist of renjun listing every single person he would rather kiss than haechan, and you’d have half the mind to volunteer yourself if you weren’t clutching at your sides laughing at the whole exchange, slapping at both jeno and sieun who tried and failed to dodge your waving hands.
renjun finally relents when chaewon suggests he lets him kiss his cheek instead, but haechan is no quitter so he makes sure that he plants the loudest, most wet kiss on his face before sighing in victory when he sits back down. renjun is not the most happy with this, and he tells jaemin to take his turn instead while he rushes off to the bathroom to wash his face. hyuck looks indignant, calling out behind renjun, asking if he wants another one.
taking the turn instead of renjun, jaemin spins the bottle harshly, and it spins and spins and spins for what seemed like an eternity. your eyes are so focused on the way the bottle looks as it spins that you don’t even notice that it has stopped, until jeno nudges you with his shoulder. it’s neck is pointed directly at you, and you finally look up from your trance at jaemin, who wears an undeniable smirk on his face.
while you didn’t exactly see him that way, there was absolutely no denying that jaemin was a very attractive man, and he was no different presently, the sleeves of his hoodie rolled up as he propped himself up with his arms, looking at you expectantly.
you don’t want to look at haechan right now, because you can see out of the corner of your eye that his face is looking straight forward, not at you or jaemin, just forward. you wonder what is going through his head, but your thoughts are cut short when jaemin scoots closer to you in the circle.
“are you okay with this?”
and when you think about, you are. “yeah, i mean it’s just a game”, you reply, not wanting to ruin the fun or raise any suspicions, to which jaemin agrees and inclines his head towards you.
he kisses you, more fully than you were expecting, but you had no complaints really as you kissed him back, titling your head in the opposite direction to slip your lips over his. you wonder if your lips were as dry as they felt, and in the back of your mind it registers that your friends are watching you kiss your other friend because they hoot and giggle, but you can’t really bring yourself to care.
jaemin’s lips taste sweet and he smells sweet, his touch soft as he brings a hand up to your cheek, gently holding it while he continues kissing you. it probably wasn’t as long as it felt, but jaemin finally pulls away, the remnants of his sweet chapstick lingering on your lips. you are aware of how hot your face feels when you pull away and return to your spot, tucking your hair behind your ears.
“dude, what chapstick do you use?”, you ask after clearing your throat, and jaemin rummages in his pant pocket for a moment before whipping out a cute pink tube, holding it out in front of him. “strawberry dream, baby”, he winks, reapplying it on his lips. “never go anywhere without it.”
renjun returns after god knows how long, stating that he had to re-do his skin care routine because haechan had completely thrown off his skin’s ph balance, and is saddened to hear that he missed witnessing you and jaemin.
the game continues in a steadfast manner for the next couple of rounds thanks to haechan insisting we play one more round, though it doesn’t exactly go in the manner you were hoping for. the group is practically in tears after watching jeno and jaemin share an awkward kiss, chaewon arguing that they can’t claim “no homo” because it was the most homo thing she’d seen in a while, and that was saying a lot because she was, in fact, gay.
you have now kissed sieun, jaemin once again and an especially endearing renjun, who’s cheeks and tips of his ears are painted a bright red after you plant a full peck on his waiting lips. haechan grumbles something about renjun not having kissed anyone besides his mom to explain his reaction, but jeno is quick to cut renjun off before another argument ensues.
“i don’t know about you guys, but i think that’s enough exchanging of saliva for one day”, he all but sighs, lying down on the floor dramatically. while you do agree, you’re disheartened, because not once has the bottle landed on you when spun by haechan, or the other way around. it feels like the universe is fucking with you, because really how many times can you spin a bottle between a group of seven people and not have it land on the one person you want to kiss even once.
haechan looks like he wants to say something, but appears to decide against it in the end, stretching and standing up. it is then mutually agreed by everyone that it was time to watch a movie.
“super bad?”, jaemin proposes, and even though most people had already watched the movie, no one argues against it and jeno starts setting up the movie on their big screen tv.
settling into the couch, you glance over at haechan and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t feeling a tad bit disappointed. this whole spin the bottle thing makes you wonder about all the other times where you could have had an opportunity to make a move on the brown-haired boy.
you’d gone on long drives together, gone partying, even drank with just each other a couple of times. the closest the two of you had ever come to crossing that line was while you where dancing at a party and his arms were looped around your waist from behind, slowly swaying to the beat. you’d danced with him tons of times before that but you recall thinking the air was a little different than normal, more heated, but you also recall mistaking renjun for your professor, so you didn’t trust yourself. the moment came and went, and neither of you ever had the balls to address it, and now it had been way too long since to bring it up.
“this seat taken?”, haechan snaps you out of your bitter thoughts, jerking his head towards the spot on the couch next to you. you clear your throat and shake your head, scooting over slightly so he could sink down next to you. “what’s up, y/n, you look a little…not present. you still high?”
it’s funny because your mind certainly wasn’t present, it was in the gutter, but you choose to blame the weed. “yeah, i’m still high”, you answered truthfully, and so was he, his red, hooded eyes a dead giveaway.
“okay, perfect, i wanted to show you this stupid tiktok i saw”, he’s pulling his phone out of his pocket and leaning closer to you to show you some video of a cat, or maybe a dog, you weren’t paying attention. he laughs at whatever the animal did, the corner of his eyes crinkling as he does so, and you observe him instead of watching. when he doesn’t hear you laugh, he peeks over at you but you’re quick to turn your head back to his phone, letting out a very late giggle at the video.
if he did catch you, he doesn’t mention it, continuing to scroll and show you more videos. jeno finally gets the movie set up and turns off the lights, taking up the final seat left on the couch. the movie begins, and everyone falls into a comfortable silence bar hyuck, who makes the occasional comment that earns him a snort from you each time.
at some point during the movie, haechan stretches his arms out behind him, placing his arm on the head of the couch directly behind you. glancing at him quickly, you can’t tell whether the action was purposeful or not, because if it was, he was doing a very good job of looking nonchalant. you try your best to ignore it, but his hand is resting directly above your shoulder, inches away from touching you- but it never does.
you had never noticed what nice hands haechan had before. long and slender, nails clipped short and clean, his middle, ring and index finger adorned with various silver rings. you note that he wears three rings on his left hand, but none on his right. his right hand sits on top of one of his thighs, two of his fingers drumming against it following some rhythm going on in his head. his fingers are long, and the only thing you can think about is just how nice they would feel inside–
no, no, no, stop it, since when are you this horny?
you realise stressing out about how horny you are all of a sudden is just going to lead to a bad trip and you don’t want that, and you want to clear your head. even though you’re feeling a different kind of thirsty, you figure a distraction for a couple minutes would be helpful, so you excuse yourself to go get some water, jumping up from the couch and walking towards the kitchen. unbeknownst to you, haechan’s watchful eyes follow your figure as you exit the room.
finally away and in the kitchen, you fill up a glass and lean over the sink, closing your eyes to collect yourself. you can finish the movie without driving yourself crazy over haechan, right? tonight is no different than any other hangout and you don’t want to weird haechan out with your unnecessary staring and poorly concealed thirsting. you just need to stop thinking about his stupid hands, his stupid thighs, his stupid hair and his stupid kissable lips. “kissable? lock in, y/n, lock in…”
“who are you talking to?”
you wince but don’t turn around, eyes screwed shut tightly. you’ve been gone for a couple minutes and you don’t know when he left the room, but you put down the glass and turn to face him.
“what’s got you so jumpy?”, he questions, leaning against the counter. his arms are folded and his gaze is piercing, face tilted slightly to the left as he observes you. this is the second time he’s startled you in the kitchen today and also happens to be the very reason you’ve been so jumpy.
“nothing, i just…god, you need to starting announcing your entry into a room, dude…”
he furrows his eyebrows but lets out a chuckle anyway, slowly sauntering over to where you stood. eyes never leaving yours, he now stands directly in front of you, caging you in between the sink and his body. the closer proximity and dim lighting isn’t helping your case in the slightest, feeling all hot and bothered as if there was a sudden change in temperature. “what’s happening? you’re usually never like this, we’ve smoked up together so many times. are you having a bad trip?”
you understand why he might think that, what with your jerky movements, dazed staring and just overall disconnected demeanour. while you were wound up a little tighter than usual, you weren’t having a bad trip, your mind was just very slightly preoccupied. “no, hyuck, i’m fine, i just…needed some water”, it’s a half-lie you tell, choosing to not tell him the full truth for the sake of your own pride.
“you just seem…off”, he seems to pick his words carefully, eyes roaming over the expanse of your face. “no, i just…”, you trail off to try and find the words to explain this situation away, but he’s just looking at you so intensely. it’s so silent in the room and the air feels all too still, and you swear you’re trying to speak coherently but haechan switches his weight to his other leg, wetting his lips with his tongue while he awaits an answer and you just freeze. “i…”
“‘i’ what? see? you’re doing it again”, he starts, running a hand through his hair, and the muted light that leaks in through the window illuminates only one half of his face, but you can see him so clearly that even the way his pretty eyelashes brush against his cheek when he blinks doesn’t go unnoticed by you. you’re subconsciously chewing on your bottom lip, feeling a little like a deer caught in headlights. “you have this look in your eye. like you wanna…”
“…what?”
everything is still and unmoving, until your eyes zero in on haechan’s hand as he raises it, slowly bringing it to graze his fingers over your cheek. his touch leaves a burning hot trail on your skin and using his thumb, he releases your bottom lip from under your teeth, hand lingering cautiously for a fleeting moment before he drops it.
“like what, haechan?”, you repeat yourself, urging him to just say whatever it is he has to say, getting tired of this back and forth. you could sell a kidney just to see what was going on in his mind right now, because he looks torn between speaking his mind and just staying silent.
“like you want to kiss me.”
a few beats of complete and utter silence pass, not even hearing the dull sound of the television in the living room anymore over the thudding of your heart in your ears. haechan takes a small and tentative step towards your frozen figure, gripping the counter you’re using to lean against with his right hand, effectively trapping you in your place. now you really are a deer caught in headlights, because he’s spoken what you’ve been thinking about for the past couple hours into existence and he is absolutely correct.
“am i wrong, pretty?”
judging by your sharp intake of breath and open-mouthed expression, you’d have to be a fool to think otherwise. he looks as if he’s waiting for you to answer him regardless, giving you a chance to get out of this, but your voice is no longer functioning, and it takes all the strength in your body to shake your head ‘no’.
his eyes flicker between your eyes and your lips, tongue peeking out to lick his lips again. “i suggested playing spin the bottle because i wanted to kiss you”, his voice is strained as he admits this, quiet and careful like he’s holding back while his eyes are trained on yours like he’s daring you to break eye contact. you don’t. “but then everyone else was kissing you but me.”
normally you would giggle at his little frown, but all you can muster up is a whisper of his name, finally breaking his all-consuming eye contact in favour of looking at his lips again. you don’t know who moves first, but the next thing you know is your lips are pressed together in a fierce kiss, your hands tangled in his soft, brown locks while he grip your waist and pull you into him.
he kisses you like a man starved and you do the same with equal fervour, not even being able to process that your little daydream is coming true. his hand comes up to caress your cheek, soon moving down your neck after stroking your face softly, using it to tilt your head for you. the position of his hand is very purposeful because his thumb presses into your throat ever so slightly, but his grip is still tight enough that you couldn’t break the kiss (not that you wanted to, anyway). the other hand snakes around your waist and pulls you impossibly closer, pressing his hips into yours.
you’re positively drunk off the feeling of haechan’s lips molding over yours and you think you might just ascend when he tugs on your bottom lip with his teeth, using the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth. body on fire, you mewl against his lips, swirling your own tongue around his while he slowly but surely bucks his hips into yours.
no wards are spoken while your hands thread through his hair, pulling on it and letting out a sound of surprise into his mouth when his hand trails down to your ass and grips it harshly. he finally releases you from the searing kiss, but he doesn’t let you catch your breath, instead spinning you around in his hold so that his front presses tightly into your back, hands slipping around your waist from behind. this feels like a déjà vu kind of moment because you are reminded of the time when you both were dancing in this exact position, except this time you were getting exactly what you wanted.
“you know how bad i wanted this?”, his voice echoes your thoughts and breaks the silence, hands running up and down your front in a teasing manner. lifting your shirt up slightly, he trails his fingers over the exposed skin of your torso and the action makes you squirm in his hold a little, and much to your surprise, he groans lewdly against your ear. “fuck, i’ve been thinking of this for so long. kissing you, having my hands all over you…”
you get the sense he’s talking more to himself than you, but you revel in it nonetheless. his hand grips your jaw and squishes your cheeks together so your lips form a pout, forcing it to the side where he plants one, two, three kisses to your puckered mouth. his other hand slips further up your shirt where he brazenly cups your boob through your bra, fondling one of them while his tongue peeks out to flick at your bottom lip.
you’re putty in his arms, all gasps and squirms and whispered ‘haechan’s. “what, baby?”, he mumbles into your cheek, the hand gripping your jaw letting go in order to slink down to your hip where it lingers for a moment. “what do you want?”
your lack of answer doesn’t bode well with him, earning you a tight squeeze to your hip as a kind of warning. “need you to touch me”, you whisper out defeatedly, and you feel haechan laugh mockingly against your face.
“yeah? need me to touch you?”, he mimics your voice while tutting, letting his hand slip further down to where you needed him the most, but not letting you have it just yet. “think you can be a good girl and keep quiet for me? we don’t need everyone outside hearing what a little slut you’re being in here.”
everyone outside. the fact that you were just a room away from all your friends who were sat watching a fun little movie together had completely slipped your mind, but if you were being honest, you couldn’t find it in you to give a shit. everything about your current disposition was so dirty. one hand under your shirt, the other about two seconds away from fingering you right in the middle of your friends’ kitchen, while said friends were sat outside, unaware of the goings-on under their own roof.
though you didn’t think actually getting caught in this position would be the most pleasant experience, the idea of it dampened your panties and caused you to whine out loud, tilting your head back against haechan’s shoulder. you receive an immediate hand clamped over your mouth in return, haechan tutting in your ear condescendingly. “looks like the little slut can’t follow a simple request.”
even though he reprimands you, his hands begin fumbling with the button of your jeans anyway, undoing it and pulling the zipper down. one hand comes up to wrap around your front and rests on your shoulder, holding you in place, and the other he sticks down your pants and cups your heat but makes no effort to move, chuckling when you try to move yourself against it. his crotch ruts against the swell of your ass and for you, any friction is better than no friction at the moment. with one hand gipping the arm around your shoulder, you slip the other behind you to palm at his hard cock over his pants, making him let out a sound of approval.
“please, hyuck”, you shake your face free of his hand and turn to look him in the eye, and he grips your throat and presses a chaste kiss to your lips.
he seems to accept your plea, finally moving his hand against you and you breathe a sigh of relief, lost in the feeling of his fingers rubbing circles on your clit over your wet underwear. he’s quick to slip his hand inside your panties, cold fingers pressed directly on to your bare pussy, spreading your wetness all over you. when he ultimately slips a finger into your tight, waiting core, you moan but it’s cut short when he slaps his hand over your mouth again. “keep. quiet.”
if someone were to walk in, the two of you would be a sight to see. you writhing in his tight hold while his hand is stuffed in your pants, two fingers pistoning in and out of you at a fast pace as his forehead is pressed against the side of your face, releasing short breaths. you look positively fucked out, and you’re both in a state of complete bliss as you grind against each other in a timely rhythm.
“my pretty girl. if i had known you wanted this too, i would’ve just grabbed you and kissed you like i wanted, in front of everyone.”
his voice is honey-like and sultry, and his fingers are nothing short of heavenly. they pump in and out of you, and he still manages to use his thumb to toy with your clit in this position, leaving you breathless and on the edge. “can’t believe jaemin and renjun got to kiss you before me.”
you’re so wet that your cunt makes downright sinful noises as he fingers you and you’re hoping that it isn’t really as loud as it seems. “you’re so wet, angel. so this is what had you all jumpy today”, he laughs like he’s stating the obvious, and you’d have half the mind to feel shy if his ministrations didn’t feel so fucking good right now.
you’re aware that you’re close and so is he because you’re clenching around his fingers, so he quickens his pace both inside you and against your clit. “you gonna cum for me, baby? right here, in the middle of kitchen, while everyone’s outside?”, he purrs against your face and you grip the part of his arm that isn’t shoved in your pants, digging your nails into his skin in a way that’s sure to leave a mark. his words make you feel dirty in the best way, not even knowing you could feel this turned on.
he peppers kisses along your jaw and neck, sucking here and there, and through the pale moonlight bleeding into the room from the window, the red blemishes that begin to bloom on your skin are visible to hyuck, and he seems pleased with his artwork. “that’s it, sweetheart, let go for me.”
your moans are muffled against his palm when you finally come, the orgasm ripping through you so strongly that you go limp in his hands, legs almost buckling at the sensation. with the added boost of the weed you smoked earlier, your orgasm is immense, feeling it pulse through your body until it’s too much, whining and wriggling in haechan’s firm hold. he holds you still and helps you ride out your high, whispering utterances of “that’s right, baby” and “my good girl” into your ear while you throw your head back and try to regulate your breathing.
in a moment, his hand slips out of your pants, turning you back around so you’re now facing him, grinning down at you from ear to ear as if you both hadn’t just defiled jaemin and jeno’s kitchen. “you feeling okay?”, he mumbles, tucking your hair behind your ear with the hand that wasn’t soaked, pressing a number of kisses all over your face as you nod and giggled, trying to evade his attack. he lets you go just to wash his hands, and it’s when he dries his wet hands on the material of his pants that you notice his raging boner, immediately feeling bad.
“wait hyuck, let me–“
as if he’s reading your mind once again, he shakes his head and takes both of your hands into his, wrapping them around his own waist while pulling you into him. “we can save that for another time, pretty”, he insists, his expression turning shy when he realises the implications behind his words. “that is, i-if you want another time, of course–“
it’s your turn to cut him off this time, but you do so by leaning up and connecting your lips again, bring a hand up to stroke his cheek. “of course i want another time, hyuck. i want this. i want you.”
your assurances do good to bring a smile to his pretty face, taking ahold of the hand on his cheek and pressing his lips to your skin gently, lovingly. “so, so, perfect.”
taking note of the prolonged amount of time the two of you had been gone, you skulk back into the living, but this time, hand in hand.
the scene you’re greeted with is a surprising one, because you find every single one of your friends to be sound asleep, much to your amusement and hyuck’s dismay. “so you’re telling me i could’ve been hearing you moan the whole time and none of these idiots would have even known?”, he is appalled, a hand coming up to rub at his face out of frustration. “i did all that for nothing?”
“i wouldn’t say for nothing”, you reveal, biting your lip and smiling up at the boy shyly. “i might have woken them up.”
“oh yeah, well now you’re going to”, and with that, he’s dragging you back to the kitchen while you giggle, nearly tripping over your own feet before he all but scoops you up in his arms, muttering to himself about having left something in the kitchen that needed urgent fetching.
#nct#haechan#kflixnet#haechan smut#haechan x reader#haechan scenarios#haechan au#haechan imagines#haechan angst#haechan oneshot#haechan drabbles#haechan fluff#haechan fic#haechan headcanons#nct fluff#nct 127#nct fic#nct scenarios#nct imagines#nct au#nct smut#nct x reader#nct dream#nct dream imagines#nct dream x reader#nct dream smut#nct dream fluff#donghyuck smut#donghyuck x reader#stoner!nct
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S. GOJO ★ DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU'RE IN MY FANTASIES?
Pairing : fem reader / teacher!Gojo
Synopsis : Gojo j*rking off to fantasies of you until eventually the two of you do it together on a phone call.
Warnings/tags : 🔞 smut, solo male m*sturbation, p*rnstar fantasy, d!ck visuals, big d!ck Gojo, risky m*sturbation (office), slight perv behavior, toys, breeding kink, use of sl*t, dirty talk, m*sturbating on phone call, pillow humping, mutual m*sturbation, phone sex
Note : lol this is the post that got accidentally published once. i hate tumblr mobile!! 😿 i still want to edit the original bc it has some juicy stuff. but i put some of it into this 😈
Library | Gojo
The first time he does it, he doesn't actually realize that he's fantasizing about you. You enter his mind randomly one night as he winds down after a long day of teaching. He naturally slides his hands down his pants.
Satoru starts massaging his growing hard-on through the fabric. His big hand wraps around the veiny shaft and he gives it a few squeezes, sighing at the sensation.
Satoru hastily unbuckles his belt and slides it off with a whip-like snap, pale veiny hands rolling it neatly before setting it down on the table besides his bed. Those pale veiny hands quickly push down the hem of his pants and grab the base of his stiff cock.
He starts stroking it slowly up and down, with his eyes closed in relaxation and his other hand snuggled behind his head.
Jerking off leisurely, not rushing at all, just enjoying how it feels to pleasure himself with his own hand.
He pictures you naked. It's just a brief thought. He grumbles at himself and shakes the image out of his mind, as if he was indulging in a taboo act.
You're the teacher he works alongside. Every day you greet him with that sweet smile and kind voice that makes his heart tick. You're so innocent and untainted, he holds back from imagining you lewdly even though he really wants to.
He bites his lip at the thought of you.
Today was hard for him, you know, because your tight uniform seemed... especially tight. He commented on it in the afternoon, of course very subtly;
"Nice tits." he flirted jokingly. But his eyes were glued to your breasts like he'd never seen a pair before.
"Thanks. My uniform shrunk in the wash." you giggled in response.
"Ah, I see." he nodded understandingly, gulping when you bent over to pick something up — even if you tried to keep your skirt down, it still rose up your thighs just enough for him to find out that you wore a G-string.
The image of your body is stuck in his head now, when he's all alone in his king-sized bed.
It makes him cum. And he cums gently, letting out a barely audible grunt of breath while it dribbles out of his cockhole and runs down his shaft.
He swipes some cum off the underside of his cock and sucks it off his finger, tasting himself. Then he falls asleep like a baby, not thinking too deeply on the fact that he came to the thought of you.
****
The next few times get more and more intense.
His cock feels so much better when you're on his mind. Even when he's in a risky setting... like his office.
Though no one would dare to walk into Gojo Satoru's office without permission, there's still the risk that you could just burst into the room — maybe to complain about him slacking off.
He thinks about the risk, and it turns him on more... his cock twitches at the fantasy of you walking in on him stroking his big cock while sat in his office, long legs spread wide and head tilted back in ecstasy.
You'd find out the obvious but dirty fact that even Gojo Satoru needs to let off steam every now and then. He's not just a teacher all the time, he's also a frustratedly horny man.
Satoru squeezes the tip of his cock and clenches his jaw.
The angry veins decorating his shaft are all raised. His cock pulses harder at the thought of you walking through his office doors — he'd love to see your reaction. Would your mouth drop open? You'd find out just how huge his cock is. Would you offer to help? Nah, that only happens in porn, right? He keeps fantasizing about the scenario as if you and him are two pornstars on set.
In this fantasy, you're just sooo shocked and thirsty for Gojo Satoru's big cock, you can't help but ride him in his office even though you risk the whole school hearing the skin slapping and moans.
He pumps his fist up and down his cock faster. You know, originally he intended to nap — he rarely gets any sleep because of much he's needed in the Jujutsu world. But for some reason, after passing you by in the corridors, he got an angry boner that just wouldn't go away.
Working up a sweat under his black uniform, Satoru slumps down in the chair while totally getting lost in his pornstar fantasy of you. He gets too hot so he splits open his jacket and unbuttons his expensive shirt until his abs are exposed. It's funny, he's slowly turning into a performer... and all he's doing is just jerking off alone for himself.
"Fuck." he mutters under his breath.
He orgasms so hard while thinking of you deepthroating him that his toes curl — that never happens. Cum splatters on his abs and he breathes heavily.
You knock on the door and he gets shocked out of his skull.
"Gojo? I have those files you requested." you spoke through the door, "Can I come in?"
"Shit uh, wait! Just give me a second!" he yells, hurryingly cleaning his cum off his abs with a tissue.
He hastily discards the tissue, and buttons up his shirt, leaving a slit of his chest exposed to catch your eye, and calls for you, "Come in."
You swish your hips when you walk in, and it drives him nuts. He acts ordinarily, like he wasn't just getting off to a wild fantasy of you, his co-worker.
"Here they are." you say, and set the files down on his desk.
"Thanks." he stares at you hard.
You'd look so good bent over my desk.
"Gojo?"
"Yup?"
"You look flushed, do you have a fever?" you ask innocently.
He swallows and replies shakily, "Nah, I'm good. I was just... doing push-ups."
"In your... office? Fully clothed?" you eye him out confusedly.
He makes a cute, dumb face and shrugs his shoulders.
****
Satoru's made jerking off part of his nightly routine. It helps him sleep. And he also can't help himself; you're more in his life now than ever, he keeps your company often and his feelings are growing quick.
He's laid in bed.
His lips part erotically and his legs tremble as he furiously jerks off. Suddenly, he shoots forward and groans "Fuck!", cumming hard all over his crotch.
Satoru's cock doesn't want him to sleep tonight. It stands up again a few minutes after he cleans up his cum and rolls onto his side to sleep. He grumbles and tosses around, hoping his boner will go away.
But it doesn't.
So he starts grinding his cock into the bed, whimpering your name into his pillow. Why is he whimpering your name? And why can't he stop himself?
He scrunches up the duvet and humps it, ass muscles tensing with each rough thrust. The friction isn't enough, he starts stroking it with his hand.
But even that isn't satisfying enough.
I need a fleshlight so bad.
He squeezes his cock tight, massages his fat balls, switches hands even, does everything he can. But his cock is needy for more and his orgasm refuses to come along.
Satoru grumbles and stops, glaring up at the ceiling for a good long while before coming up with an idea.
He props a pillow and buries his heavy cock into it. Then he plants two big hands on it, grabbing it as if it's your hips, and thrusts his greedy cock back and forth.
The bed squeaks under the force of the Strongest's hard thrusts. He fucks the pillow and talks dirty to it in his mind, pretending it's you.
"Just let me have your pussy, please."
"You wanna have my babies? Of course you do. Slut."
"That's it, lay there and let me knock you up."
The thought of you squeezing his muscular biceps in your tiny hands is what makes him cum. He groans and clenches his teeth, jawline becoming super defined as he cums into the crinkled up pillow. His gooey cum spills out and stains the fabric.
He gets hit with a wave of post-nut clarity. "What the fuck..." he pushes his hair out of his eyes.
His forehead is sweaty, his chest is heaving, and he feels so guilty for getting off to you again.
****
So Gojo Satoru bought a fleshlight after that frustrating night. He rushed to leave work early, so you caught him.
"Don't be lazy, 'Toru." you frowned, "You're really gonna let me finish this paperwork all by myself?"
The doe eyes you gave him stuck in his mind. All he replied with was a suspicious chuckle and a lame excuse.
"I'm so tired, gimme a break just this once, please?" he pleaded, feeling his blood rush south. You looked especially good.
"Alright, fine then. Get some rest, okay?" you said caringly, letting him off.
He squeezes his cock into the pocket pussy and pumps it up and down quick, relishing in the sound of lube squelching.
The toy is too small for his big cock, but he likes that. It makes him think about how tight you'd be — oh damn it, there he goes again thinking of you when he really shouldn't be.
"I know it's too big, baby, but take it please..." he's dirty talking to you in his mind.
Satoru's got an unsuspecting kinky side to his personality, and it really shows as he fucks his toy. His heavy balls slap against the silicone, causing lube to squirt out.
He momentarily stills inside to suck the sticky cherry lube off his finger, imagining it's your juices. Thinking of how you taste makes his cock twitch, and he starts up with his pounding thrusts again, grunting under his breath and clenching his jaw.
Satoru's got an awful breeding kink. He once told you at a Christmas party that he hoped to start a family one day. Now suddenly as his orgasm works up with each thrust, he thinks back on your response;
"Me too, I'd love to have a big family."
He groans and twists your words in his fantasy; "Cum inside me, Satoru! Gimme your babies!"
"Fuck." he hisses, cumming hard inside the fleshlight.
Once isn't enough, he keeps filling it until he works up a sweat and his cock tires out.
After cleaning his cum out the toy, he washes his face in the bathroom and leans over the sink, shaking his head at himself for thinking of you saying such lewd things.
****
Fact: Satoru sleeps naked.
When passing the mirror in the mornings, he rubs his eyes and takes a moment to check himself out. He flexes his abs, and then a raunchy fantasy brews in his mind;
What if she rode my abs? Could I make her cum like that.
"Oh my god." he mutters out loud, rubbing his face in annoyance at his own horniness.
He slides on his sweatpants without underwear — cock too big, you know, gotta let it breathe without underwear. And he goes to the kitchen to make an super-sweetened coffee.
But his boner is annoying him. It stands up, making a bulging tent out of his sporty sweatpants.
Abandoning his coffee, Satoru gets his fleshlight and tapes it to the kitchen countertop, and squirts lube into it until it oozes out. He likes it sloppy.
Still thinking hard about the fantasy of you riding his abs, he lubes his abs up and caresses them slowly, feeling up and down his chest and tweaking his pink nipples for a bit before paying his cock attention.
"That's it, ride my abs. I know you like them."
He'd love to see you humping on his stomach like it's your pillow. As he slides into the fleshlight and slowly pumps in and out of it, he wonders how you touch yourself. Do you use toys, or your fingers? Do you take your time?
Pressing his two palms flat on the kitchen countertop, Satoru starts fucking the fleshlight harder and harder until the squelching sound is loud enough to reach his ears.
He's starting to think more deeply about you — how soft and warm your cunt must feel. How it would squish under the weight of his heavy cock. He'd definitely slap his cock onto your tummy to show you how much cock you were about to take inside.
Without thinking, he brokenly moans your name as he cums hard.
****
One night, you're on a call with Satoru. He lays back on his bed, long legs stretched out. Even though you're talking business stuff, the sound of your voice gets him hard and he rolls over — soft grunts carry through the phone to you.
"What are you doing?"
"Nothing. Moving around. You were saying?"
As you keep talking, Satoru starts subconsciously humping his pillow.
"Ugh, fuck..."
"What was that?"
"Sorry, got a cramp." he lies, sensitive cock twitching against the pillow.
He humps it harder and harder, sometimes slowing or stopping to reply to something you say.
"Are you okay? You sound like you're breathing heavily."
"Yeah, just... working out."
"... what's with you and working out so often? Didn't you work out in your office the other day? Freak." you giggle.
Your giggle makes his dick throb. He smiles guiltily.
"I've just been enjoying myself lately... um, with exercising." he speaks, voice sounding oddly sultry.
He keeps sliding his cock back and forth on the pillow. You return to the previous topic of grading problems, and he listens intently.
"What do you think, Satoru?"
He lets out a squeaky grunt that could easily be excused as one of those noises you make during exercise.
"Couldn't hear you, c-can you repeat that?"
"(blablablagradingsomethingsomething) Satoru." he hears you say his name at the end again and it brings his orgasm closer.
He nearly chokes as he swallows. "Yeahhh that sounds g-good... so good. Ugh, fuck."
"Satoru?"
He cums so hard hearing you call his name. As his cum spurts out, he pretends like nothing's happening and keeps talking to you in a shaky voice. A few seconds pass and he speaks a little more normally.
"Must be some work out routine to make you swear like that." you joke, voice suggesting that you knew exactly what he just did.
"Uh... y-yeah." he acts a fool. His face burns red hot realizing that he just possibly fucked up big time.
"Well, you're probably all sweaty and gross. Why don't you go shower and I'll call you back?" you suggest.
His heart beats hard and he cringes at himself. "Yeah, I think I'll go do that..." he looks down at his cum staining pillow. "... wish you could join me." he mutters under his breath.
"Wow," you giggle. "I didn't think you liked me in that way."
He grins, cheek squishing against his phone screen. "Sorry for being a perv."
"Not at all. I like the attention you give me."
His heart flutters. Well since the mood is set, he thinks, maybe he should prod and see how far he can take this.
"Do you think of me when you're alone in bed?" he asks.
When you hesitate to reply, he gets a little nervous.
"More than I'm willing to admit." you reply.
He smirks. "Oh yeah?" he flusters you with his deepened voice. "What do you fantasize about?"
"Mmm, come find out." you tease.
His boner is sticking up, begging for some relief.
"... I'm hard."
"Yeah, I'm wet."
"Uh... do you mind if I...?"
"Exercise?" you joke.
He giggles guiltily, "Yeah."
"... why don't we do it together?"
He widens his eyes and blanks for a second.
"You wanna touch yourself with me?" he asks in disbelief.
"I am already." you reply.
He chokes up, "Oh."
"So... what exactly were you doing earlier?" you ask suggestively, rubbing yourself through your panties slowly.
Satoru hums, "You wanna know my exercise routine?"
"Haha, yeah..."
"... I was just fucking my pillow. I never usually do that unless I'm really sensitive."
"Oh, so my voice got you sensitive?" you tease.
"Maybe." he replies breathily.
Precum beads out of the tip of his cock, enough to make a squelching sound as he jerks his hand only up and down the first few inches of his cock.
"... are you going fast or slow?" you ask.
"Kinda fast..."
"... okay, then I'll go faster, too."
Satoru listens intently, desperate to hear you moan. When he puts you on speaker, he can hear how wet you are.
"A-are you using a toy?" he asks, hearing some sort of thrusting action through the phone.
"Yeah... I'm trying to hit my G-spot but it's hard. Wish you could come help me." you pout and he can hear that cute pout.
"Shit, I'd love to. H-hold on a minute, will ya sweetheart? I wanna use my toy too. Keep touching yourself, don't stop."
Satoru hears your soft noises as he reaches over into his bed-side table drawer to fish out his toy and lube.
He hastily lubes up the fleshlight and slides into it. "Fuck..."
Biting on the hem of his shirt, Satoru exposes his flexing abs as he fucks his fleshlight loud enough for you to hear. He lazily tugs his shirt off with one hand, never stopping his thrusts.
"Satoru, I'm really close already..."
"I-it's okay. I can cum q-quick if you just say my name."
You can hear him pounding into the toy harder when you start moaning his name. All he needs to tip over is for you to announce your orgasm, and then he lets out a low growl and rolls his eyes back, releasing a hot load of cum.
His balls are squished up against the entrance of the toy as he stuffs every inch inside. And then oops, the poor toy breaks.
"Haha, fuck." you hear him
You ease out of your orgasm state and come back to reality. Oh, did you just have phone sex with Gojo Satoru?
"What happened?" you ask.
"I broke my toy." he replies smugly.
You laugh, "Oh, that's unfortunate." you say, "Well, if you need a new toy come pick me up tomorrow and take me out on a date."
"Wow."
© arminsumi
I do not permit the copying/reposting/translation/plagiarism of my works. Do not steal what I've worked hard to create.
This is fictional work.
#mdni#smut#🔞.smut#gojo smut#gojo satoru smut#gojo x reader smut#gojo satoru x reader#gojo x reader#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk x reader smut#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x you#gojo#satoru gojo#jujutsu gojo#jjk gojo#gojo satoru#satoru#satoru x reader#satoru smut#satoru x you
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-- Touch deprived boys
✧ or: touch- or not so touch deprived wind breaker boys ✧ featuring: Sakura Haruka, Suo Hayato, Umemiya Hajime, Hiragi Toma & Kaji Ren x gn!reader [separate] ✧ content: established relationship & fluff ✧ a/n: i dropped one suo fic and got busy the same week and fell ill the next week lmfao. hiragi may be a bit ooc - ya know when you know how the characters act and how they are in theory, but can't articulate that in your works? yeah. yeah. this is not proofread we post this without beta-reading like real men.
Sakura doesn't register the feeling at first. To be more precise, he doesn't know what the feeling is at all when it first appears.
I imagine Sakura having a significant other that's the polar opposite to him when it comes to physical touch - as in they would 100% at any given moment when they're together hold any part of Sakura that they come in contact with. (This boy cannot for the life of him shake off anyone he deems close away, grab his hand and lead him on and he will 100% complain the entire way, but he'll never shake off your hand)
Which means that ever since he did start to date you, he wouldn't even know the meaning of what touch deprivation even is - because not a day goes by when you're not touching him some part of him.
So when a day actually comes when you're not holding onto him, he feels genuinely put off. Something is wrong, but he can't put his finger on it. And oh boy does that clearly show on his face. Sakura is after all - an open book when it comes to his feelings.
He's moody, he doesn't snap and yell like usual - but he only mutters answers back whenever someone asks him something. Even to you - if anything, you would think he's mad at you. He's fidgeting with his hands, tugging at his sleeves and averting his gaze from you whenever you ask if he's okay.
He's an open book yeah, but he won't say a damn thing - pride and all.
It'll most likely be in a scenario where you're surrounded by more people than usual that you hold back a bit on showing affection. But still, you're mostly by his side, talking to him, handing him drinks and heck your shoulders brush against each other every time you laugh at something his classmate had said - you're that close to him.
And yet it feels wrong.
"Oh, Haruka your drink is empty. Want me to go grab another one?" you're not even waiting for an answer before you lean away from the wall behind you to head towards the refreshments table on the other side of the rooftop.
It's only when your presence once again leaves his side that Sakura springs into action, reaching out to barely grasp the fabric of your shirt to hold you slightly back. Puzzled, you turn around with a confused smile, only to be met with an equally confused, but frantic stare from your lover. "Everything okay, Haruka?" you ask again, ignoring the fact that Haruka's gaze is looking all over the place but at your own face.
"Y-yeah, why wouldn't it be?" although he says that, his hand is still grasping onto your shirt. A few seconds go by in silence before you feel a slight tug against them - and suddenly every dot in your confused brain starts to connect on his bizarre behaviour today.
Your eyes soften, and Sakura can hear your quiet chuckle when you turn around to face him, forcing his fingers to let go. But before he can ask what you're laughing about, he can feel himself being pulled into a hug, and he can feel your smile against his shoulders as you pat his back comfortably. "You're so cute, Haruka." he can hear you say through your quiet giggles.
You can hear a quiet "Shut up…" from him, but you can feel the way his posture drastically softens under your hug. But before your duo-coloured lover could wrap his arms around your waist, you hear a low whistle coming from behind you. "Naaw, Sakura-kun was missing [Name]'s touch for the day."
And in an instant you're yanked (gently) away by an arms length with Sakura yelling profanities at a laughing Suo. Well at least he's back to normal.
Suo's never "deprived" per say of your touch - because he's the one initiating it 90% of the time.
He's already physically affectionate. He's usually seen having an arm around your waist when you're peering at something, holding your hand when the two of you go for a walk or leaning over you when you're standing still to rest his chin on top of your head (if you're shorter, if not he'll bury his face into the crook of your neck).
And while you don't mind (in fact often times you lean most of your weight on him if he's standing behind you once you feel his presence) Suo does want you to initiate contact once in a while.
But alas those feelings is rarely shown on his face, always sporting a neutral smile to any situation he's put in - no one can tell that he's a bit more troubled than usual.
But what kind of lover would you be, if you weren't able to spot these miniscule changes in Suo? When he now only briefly holds onto your waist to silently announce his presence beside you before retracting his arm back and when he waits for your fingers to graze against his own before he tangles them together?
You do notice, and Suo also knows you've noticed the slight difference in your otherwise normal habits. How you peer up at him a bit longer than usual when he decides to sit next to you in the library instead of behind you like he usually does so you can rest against him. But he only gives you a wide smile in return to your confused glance.
"You know-" you say with a start, seating yourself down on Suo's lap the moment he seats himself down properly on the tatami floor of his room, your lover only wrapping an arm around your back to make sure you don't topple over. "This is a very elaborate way to tell me you want me to initiate physical contact more often."
"Hmm? Whatever do you mean?" he feigns ignorance, merely tilting his head slightly to the side when you twirl your fingers around the tassels of his left earring whilst resting your head against his shoulder. "Why can't you just ask like any other person for a hug or something?" you question.
"That wouldn't be fun. I wanted to see if you loved the physical touch as much as me, after all." he says, and you raise your eyebrow in confusion, "Me not reciprocating your touches was not an answer?" you inquire, raising your head to stare at him, Suo only giving you a smile that seems a bit too mischievous back while shaking his head.
"Initiating and reciprocating are two different things, dear. Initiating takes a lot more courage after all." you only hum in return, resting your head back on his shoulder before taking a hold of his hand to toy with his fingers, bending the appendages while admiring how smooth his skin was - even with all the fighting he does. "I like it when you initiate contact first though…" you murmur in the end. Suo, who had initially thought you had put the matter of his impromptu idea to the side hums in surprise at your quiet confession.
"Why?"
You shrug, deciding to intertwine your fingers together before resting them on your own lap, smiling softly at how Suo's thumb brush against the skin of your hand. "I don't know either. I just know that it's you whenever someone takes a hold of my hand, you do have the habit of grazing your fingers against mine before holding them after all. It's almost like your way of saying hello before we even make eye contact." you tell, "You always reach out for my hand first after all."
You're not staring at him, still busy looking at your clasped hands - but he still smiles down at your form, turning his head to press his lips on top of your head. "Well with such a sweet reason, who am I to not initiate it more then, hmm?"
He makes it known that he wants your touch before you can even tell he's deprived.
Which means he's never deprived, because when Umemiya feels that he needs a hug, he's making a beeline towards you to engulf you in his arms.
Which means there are two outcomes to this. If you're within his sights and he sees you as soon as he wants a hug, everything is A-OK! Umemiya gets his well needed hug to tackle the next set of duties and tasks he has set for himself for the next 3 hours.
If you're not in his arms within the next 10 minutes of him wanting a hug, he's going to talk to his plants like you've gone off to war and won't come back before the next year. Talking about how much he misses your presence, your favourite food, what kind of seed you would probably prefer, how he's found a new book that you love. At this point feel sorry for the person that has to sit through those 10 minutes of constant love declarations. (Hiragi)
And yes, Hiragi has you on speed dial because of this. It does not matter that you've recently been up on the rooftop spending time with him, it does not matter if you've just gone downtown to get some drinks - Hiragi does not get paid enough for this and he will personally escort you back to Bofurin's leader to make him shut up.
You better clear your schedule for the next hour because Umemiya will have you in his arms before making sure you're well fed and spend time with you. He doesn't necessarily have to constantly touch you then - if he can see you within his vision he's already beaming brighter than the sun in the sky.
"Hajime, you're about to squeeze my entire air supply out." you manage to wheeze out while laughing, Umemiya merely burying his face further into your hair while swinging you back and forth in the air.
"You could've told me that you were going to go shop for groceries for Kotoha! I would've helped." he exclaimed whilst putting your down on the ground again, though his arms were still snugly wrapped around your waist and still keeping you pressed against his front. Your own arms around his back when you noticed that he wouldn't budge from this position anytime soon.
"Last time you helped out, you crushed 2 dozens eggs remember? The townsfolk love you too much too, we would've needed more hands if you came along because of the amount of freebies they would give you. Besides she just wanted a few things and I was already out when she asked where I was, so it wasn't too much trouble to make another round through the town." you replied, stepping side to side while pushing yourself against Umemiya, a silent request for him to move backwards towards the wooden canopy so you both could sit down.
Once seated, you find yourself placed on top of Umemiya's lap with his arms still snugly wrapped around your waist, securing your body close to his own when you lean backwards to properly look at him while talking. At this point Umemiya has gone off tangent, eyes brimming with excitement over what had happened on the day you had mentioned the crushed eggs, only stopping his tangent when you bring a handkerchief up to his face to wipe away the dirt.
"… How long have you been in that position?" an exasperated gruff voice questions, and both you and Umemiya turn over to the entrance of the rooftop to see Hiragi leaning against the door.
"Hiragi! You want some water? Maybe some onigiri? Oh right, [Name] had also picked up some snacks!"
"It's been 15 minutes."
"Good grief, Umemiya, let [Name] go aleady, they're not your personal teddy bear."
Hiragi in general is not a physically affectionate person. He doesn't mind it, softens quite a bit when you grasp his hand whenever you join his group when they patrol the town and relaxes his posture while sinking further down the slope of the couch so that you can rest your head on his shoulder - even if the posture itself causes him a bit of discomfort after.
He's quite content just having you walk by his side - as long as he can see you from his peripheral vision or heck, just hear your voice speak from beside him or behind him, he's content.
He does however have his moments. Although it's incredibly hard to spot because Hiragi himself doesn't mind going days without getting a kiss even.
And even when you do initiate the first touch, he handles you like a porcelain doll - almost afraid you will break. You can hug him as tight as you can, he'll laugh and say he's not going to disappear anytime soon, but the hug you receive back is so gentle and full of love it almost brings you to tears alone.
Hiragi is aware of his position within Bofurin, and the fact that his name carries a lot of weight and is known beyond the town - as such he initiates the most contact when you're alone. And even that is a rare occurrence being that you're both busy most of the time.
As such, even though it's rare - Hiragi will show subtle signs that he wants to cradle you within his arms or hold your hand. A gentler gaze when he addresses you - a more carefree grin when you open your arms wide waiting for him to come to you, but even you can see the slight hesitation.
All in all, Hiragi is quite content and rarely gets touch deprived, but no one is immune to their lover asking for a quick hug, even when you yourself isn't much of a physically affectionate person.
"Can I have a hug? Please?" Hiragi blinks slowly in confusion, takes a look behind him before directing his attention to you. "… Did you have to ask me in a sketchy alleyway of all things?" he finally asks, which makes you laugh, hands still outstretched waiting for Hiragi to take the 2 steps to reach you.
"And here I thought I was going to get a lecture from dragging you away from patrolling." you say, now wriggling your fingers to emphasise your current need for a hug from your boyfriend. "Think of it like an energy boost for the day! I know you've been craving a hug from yours truly for a long time after all, it's been a while since your last recharge!" you add on, Hiragi quirking an eyebrow with a smile.
"You're keeping track of them now?" he scoffs, taking the two steps you desperately wanted him to take, reaching out his own hands to intertwine them with your own before holding onto your wrists to rest your arms on his shoulders. "Hehe, next time I should keep track on how many Gas-kun 10 you take." you can see the roll of his eyes as he wraps his arms around your waist while you lock your own arms around his neck, rubbing your face into his neck to breathe in the faint hint of cologne he dons each day.
The arms wrapped around your waist tightens a bit more than usual, and you can feel the stiffness of Hiragi's form loosen "You're on your lunch break?" he asks softly, to which you nod against his neck, "Mhm, have to go back within 10 minutes if I don't want my teacher to give me an earful again." he hums, giving you one last squeeze before stepping back.
He only pinches your puffed out cheeks, "Don't give me that look, I'll come pick you up after school okay? I think Umemiya misses talking to you as well." Upon hearing that, your eyes brighten immediately before skipping past him out of the alleyway, "Promise to not be late?"
"When have I ever been?"
Another boy who does not know how to function when he's touch deprived! But unlike Sakura, he does know when he is indeed needing for some more cuddles than normal.
But he's awkward, he doesn't know how to actually go on about asking for hugs. Yes in his mind it's logical to just straight up ask you for a hug, or if you can just sit in front of him so he can lean his forehead on the nape of your neck and just breathe in your fragrance. Very easy to do!
Easier said than done. Especially when he's the type to not do anything before you give him permission - yes he's still scared of hurting you even though when he's around you, he's fully in control of his emotions and reactions. But there's always a lingering feeling, you know?
Still jumps in surprise at times when you graze your fingers against any exposed part of his skin, but once he sees it's you - best believe he's holding onto you till someone calls him out.
He's more prone to initiate more contact when you're alone, being that in public he's prone to get teased (whether that's voluntarily by his classmates or involuntarily by Umemiya's comments on how soft he's gotten)
So as a compromise to his awkward self when you're in public, you'll get random visits from Kaji numerous times a week - which is a silent request to just have you in his arms.
Kaji's attention is taken away from his phone when he feels your fingers graze against his chin. Glancing down, he cocks his head to the side while pushing his headphones down to rest on the nape of his neck. "What's up?" he inquires softly, you don't say anything at first - merely directing your fingers towards his cheeks to graze against his skin there.
"Weren't you supposed to patrol today?" you ask, bringing your other free hand to push Kaji's hand that's holding onto his phone to your eye level. "In around 15 minutes yeah, I just left earlier." he answers, his fingers that were absentmindedly stroking your head grazing a few stray strands away from your forehead.
"It already takes 10 minutes from Furin to my house though? Shouldn't you leave soon?" you point out, but instead of rising from his lap to let him get up from the floor, you merely roll to your side to bury your face against his stomach before becoming still - leaving Kaji with both arms in the air, waiting for you to move.
"If you let me go, that is." he finally says after a second of silence, he can feel your slight nod before you plant your hands beside him to heave yourself up from his lap. And in the blink of an eye, you're at eye level with Kaji - his breath hitching at the close proximity.
"Don't come back with too many bruises, alright?" you remind, before slotting your lips briefly over his own. As you lean back you pull his headphones snugly over his ears again, mouthing something that makes Kaji roll his eyes. "You still let me inside regardless, so that threat doesn't work anymore."
#wind breaker#wind breaker x reader#haruka sakura x reader#suo hayato x reader#ren kaji x reader#hiragi toma x reader#umemiya hajime x reader
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