#if i die i need to be buried with a kiwi so everyone knows this was the cause of my death.

[hyunpic]

hyunjin @ 250118 dominATE tour 📍hong kong

[katsuflossy]

Misguided Spark

Pairing: Kaminari Denki x black reader

TW: Suggestive themes, some obscenities, Becky

A/n: Why do I always get inspired by Tiktoks 😭😭 but anyways I’ve been giving Mr Bakugo wayy too much attention and neglecting our shocky boy Denki. So please enjoy!!! 💕

P.S. credit to my bb @iiminibattlehero for giving me a title when my brain was pooped😣

You’ve been with Denki for two years. After joining Uravity’s agency, you’ve met the bolt of lightning that struck through your beautiful black heart (this was after many failed pickup lines and one failed date that resulted in your favorite shirt getting seared off.) Denki did nothing to conceal you, in fact, he showed you off despite your protests; the few couples photos on his Instagram told the story of your love life—not secret but it’s none of your business. 

So why do his fans pair him up with every other hero?!

You would’ve understood if he was shipped with his friends and other heroes in the Big Leagues; your reputation being Uraraka’s sidekick had granted you some fame but you hadn’t reached the big pond yet. 

However, his mass of fans and reporters paired him with everyone under the sun—heroes and sidekicks alike—except you. Just last week Mina nearly choked out a reporter because he trailed her during her patrol, asking what she and Chargebolt did last night. Who knew a simple drink with close friends would spread like wildfire over the news. Oh, not to mention you were there too, holding Kaminari’s hand and laying your head on his shoulder. Your brown face and body had been cut out from every magazine seen the next day. The picture of Mina and Kaminari at an older drink night resurfaced on your timeline, showing Mina slapping his back as he choke-laughed on some beer. 

You didn’t tell Denki your insecurities about the whole world romanticizing him with other very pale—except for Mina’s case—heroes. You can picture his exact laugh, his hand falling on your cheek while affirming you had nothing to worry about. You’re his lovely lady forever and always. 

However, tonight was a different kind of irritation.

The bedroom finally fell quiet, your steamy session released the sexual tension during today’s joint practice. Kaminari’s eyes followed your heavenly molded ass all around the gym, and your own followed his nicely sculpted back when it was angled in your peripheral view. The deed was done now. Your finger made pointless drawings on his naked chest as you laid against his stomach, looking thoughtlessly up at him and his blonde glory. Two nude bodies curled against each other in comfortable silence.

At least that was the case until your phone pinged due to a notification. Your phone glowed the Twitter symbol, the only app you used to keep up with the hero scene and news. One glance at the title and you wished you had put your phone on Do Not Disturb.

Chargebolt's with a civilian fiancee?! Read more about the Electric hero dating top American chef, Becky Gudhear, and their secret relationship.

Your lips formed a scowl at the picture. The blond female chef was entering a car as Denki held her umbrella above her head, the rain clattering against the umbrella as he smiled at the lady. Only for you to remember the next two minutes after the photo was taken; Denki snatched you up, running through the rain as both screamed in delight. 

You shot up from his muscular chest, the middle of your brows creased and your brown thumb scrolled through the hashtags. Denki looked at you before going on his own phone.

Deku’s ratty shoes @noticemesemmpai: “I didn’t know Denki liked white girls *this goes completely with my fantasy*”

Ground zero’s harem girl @otakuforevaava: “Not him cheating on Mina.”

Ground zero’s harem girl #2 @lemmebiteacrumbofdatass: “@otakuforevaava Nah, he’s with Jiro. Did y’all not see when she gave him that hug?”

Your eyes darted from one ship to another, none ever mentioning you, before throwing your phone on the mattress. You swung your legs over the edge of the bed, removing yourself from its comfort to pace around the room in frustration. Denki cocked a brow at your strange behavior; you weren’t usually this upset and if you were, you’d simply just watch baby videos until you perked up. The screen glowed through the mattress despite being faced down, holding the secret of your furrowed eyebrows and sharp glare. He took up the phone, showing all the news outlets, fan mentions, and titles creating a relationship not with his black girlfriend but with some random lady that he helped out of the kindness of his heart. 

“Damn, they’re really going bonkers over this one act of kindness. Is Chivalry that dead?”

“As dead as their brains are.” You grumbled out, flopping back on to the edge of the bed.

“It’ll die out in a week. Give or take.” 

“Or not at all. They always come back when they spot you 6 feet from this lady, then resurface this same picture or even better crop me out and photoshop her in it!” Your outburst was met with silence and a wide-eyed, very concerned lighting wielder. 

“...but it’s cool tho.” 

“(Y/n)? Why didn’t you tell me this’d been hurting you?” Your gaze averted to your fingers, twiddling as your embarrassment heated your cheeks.

“I didn’t want to because I thought you’d think I was silly for thinking like that. Plus, I was the one that told you that being with a superhero like you will make me look like a whore trying to climb the ranks.”

“Silly? Baby, I nearly threw your teddy bear across the room because it was looking at your ass too much. If anything I’m the silly one.”

“You didn’t nearly throw Parker across the room, you did throw him across the room.” Two pairs of eyes went to the slumped bear at the opposite corner of the room. It’s patched tongue ratty due to the force it was a victim to.

“... And I’d do it again.” Your attempt to sigh only released the giggle in your throat as Denki continued.

“And baby? Fuck what these tabloids are saying. You’re a skillful fighter and Ochaco’s number one sidekick! If that isn’t a fine, brave, amazing woman then I don’t know what is.” Your body tingled in warmth, unable to hide the physical effects of his compliments as wrapped your arms around his neck, kissing him straight on his lips.

“Thank you Denki, I really needed to hear that.” 

“Oh, I’m not done yet.” He moved out of your embrace, kneeling to set his phone up on the bedside table. The lamp was used as support, showing the front camera the entirety of the room. 

“Denki? What are you doing?”

“Don’t worry doll, just sit there and look pretty.” He continued to tap against the screen before a familiar symbol popped up.

Tiktok, one of Denki’s favorite apps, met your eyes as it began to start up. Denki was one of the only pro heroes on Tiktok, which garnered him 5.5 million followers, and at least a million views each video he made. He swiped and scrolled until his eyes lighted up.

“Go put on my shirt. I don’t want them seeing any parts of you only for my pleasure.” You raised an eyebrow at the request but still complied. 

“Now come here, sexy.” Your footsteps hesitantly approached his side of the bed, unknowing about what scheme he made up in his brain. You stopped right where the camera couldn’t see you but you were too far for his liking, so he grabbed the plush of your thigh, pulling you close enough to bury his nose into your flesh. 

“That’s more like it. You ready?” 

“Denki I swear to God you better answer me. What are we doing—”

He tapped the screen, unaffected by your threat, and began to record. The beat was all too familiar before your eyes widened and your face erupted in heat. Sex Talk?!

“Aye uh...ahhh.” He wasted no time getting into character, sticking his tongue out as he winked at the camera. Your melanin-rich thigh stared back at you through the phone, making it known that the leg Denki held indeed belonged to a black person. His hand, under the shirt, kept firm on the back of your thigh to ensure that you stayed within the frame as he continued his Tiktok.

“Aye, bad bitch tastes like cherry kiwi, real big titties these double DDs.” He sings out the song, pointing to your very exposed thigh. Your face hot, the thought of this going online burned your face with not only embarrassment but also excitement. You buried your face in your hands as Denki skimmed your leg with his nose.

“Mwah…” He pressed his lips against your flesh, the epicenter sending tingling waves through your body as he looked straight up at you. His eyes twinkled with mischief as the sound ended. He grabbed the phone before you could reach it, hitting ‘post’ before you could snatch it out of his hand.

“Denki! Your PR manager is so going to kill me.” You scrolled through his phone frantically; it was already pinging with likes and comments from the video posted just 10 seconds ago.

He plucked the phone from your hands and placed it down on the table.

“Never mind that baby girl. The song said a bad bitch tastes like cherry kiwi and I suddenly forgot how that taste. Maybe I should sample you again…” Without ceasing he pressed his lips against yours, ready to start the night off again. 

(H/n)’s footstool @blackshipper: @theeofficialy/n this you? *Chargebolt’s new TikTok*

Chargebolt and (h/n) sittin in a tree @comegetyalljuice: I fucking knew it! (h/n)’s living our Chargebolt fantasy.

Stream Sex Talk by Megan @kpophoebutnotondalow: If your man ain’t kissing up your thigh like Chargebolt did with (h/n), is he even your man?

Mirko’s left rabbit foot @westanMirko: Guys, that’s not @theeofficialy/n, that’s Mirko duh…

You rolled your eyes at the tweet before scrolling through the rest of them. Denki’s chest raised and lowered as he looked through his own phone. Suddenly, you received an email notification. Your eyes widened as you read its body.

“Denki! Some talk show wants us to come in and talk about our relationship. They finally recognize that I’m your partner!” He craned his neck to face you, offering a smirk at your excitement.

“Good, that’ll show Parker who you’re real man is!” The teddy bear stayed in the corner it was thrown, now laying on its side, looking solemnly at the bed. 

“You’re annoying.”

“You still love me though.” A smile spanned your face as you inched closer to Denki’s. Your lips met his in a soft embrace before withdrawing. 

“Yeah, I do.”

[girls-scenarios]

This World

Idols: Haseul and Vivi (Loona)

Prompt: Can I ask for a dark LOONA ViSeul scenario where OT12 live in a world which is full of brutal crimes and the girls are the only heroes left who can stop them? Tho powers etc are illegal and everyone who has powers lost their human rights, but the girls still want to save the world, they don't have secret identities anymore and in one day Vivi got badly hurt by their enemy, so she and Haseul decide to get illegally married and OT12 are throwing a big marriage. Kinda based on Watchmen great film:D

Writer: Admin Kiwi

A/N: Okay so I took a few liberties with the prompt so it ended up being pretty angsty. And I (mostly) used their real names. Also there are like? No viseul gifs? And I don’t have the time to make my own right now. But anyway, I hope you all still enjoy!

Warnings: Blood, injury, fighting, mentions of death, major character death, cursing. This gets really dark, I’m warning you.

♡ Tip Jar♡

The air was clogged thick with smoke and fog as Vivi and Haseul entered the neighborhood. What had once been a beautiful place to live was now left desolate and crumbling, bombed until only rubble remained. As they stopped on the road, taking in the situation, Haseul’s heart dropped. She had a feeling this would be another dead-end run. The only buildings still recognizable were the church and one crumbling apartment building, and that wasn’t a good sign. Still, they had a job to do, so she took a deep breath and turned to her girlfriend.

“I’m going to check over here in the church for any survivors, you take the apartment building. Sooyoung, can you hear us?” She touched at her temple, just like the other woman had taught her.

“Loud and clear.” Sooyoung’s voice rang through her head. “I’ll be listening, keep us updated.”

“Will do,” Vivi said aloud, touching her temple as well. “Things aren’t looking good, but we’ll do our best.”

Haseul reached over and squeezed Vivi’s hand, giving her a grim smile. “Good luck.”

“Same to you.”

The church was leaning on it’s side, and as Haseul approached, it teetered slightly, rubble falling from the sides. Swallowing, she took her steps carefully, trying not to disturb the crumbling remains around her. Any wrong step and she could be buried in rubble. It wouldn’t hurt her if she could put up a shield in time, but it would be a pain for Vivi to dig her back out and she didn’t want that.

“Hello? Is anyone here?” She stepped into the building, glancing around, only for her stomach to turn again. No one would be answering her call. Still, she searched, hoping for at least one pulse or one gasp of breath. Hopefully, Vivi was having more luck. Her x-ray vision kept her from having to search closely like everyone else. “Rest peacefully,” Haseul said quietly as she stood from the last body, shaking her head. “I wish I could give you all a proper burial.”

“Any luck? Vivi said hers was bust.” Sooyoung echoed in her head again and she sighed.

“No luck over here, I think-.” She never saw it coming. As she stepped out of the church, a clatter of rubble made her turn, only for her to come face-to-face with four men in black and white masks. The terrorists. Her stomach dropped and she raised her hand, but even as she moved, she knew she was too late. Their guns were already firing, she wouldn’t be able to throw up a shield in time.

Something stepped in front of her, and her eyes widened, her heart stopping as she stumbled forward. “Vivi!” The world went red, and as Haseul’s shield blinked to life, Vivi fell to the ground, body limp. Haseul ran towards her, fear coursing through every vein in her body as she fell to her knees beside her girlfriend and cradled the older woman’s head in her arms, taking in the damage. There was so much blood, too much to even see where the wounds were, and Vivi wasn’t responding. “Vivi!” Haseul screamed it this time, tears beginning to stream down her face a she held her closer, panic setting in. “Please, I can’t lose you too, I can’t live without you.”

“Haseul! What the hell is happening! Are you okay?” It was Sooyoung. Haseul only then realized that she hadn’t taken her hand away from her temple when she first screamed Vivi’s name. Quickly, she lifted her bloodied hand to her temple.

“We were ambushed. Vivi’s down, I-I don’t know if she’s going to make it, I don’t know what to do, I can’t-.”

“I have Yerim on her way to get you right now! Do you have a shield up?”

“Y-yes. Please tell her to hurry, Vivi needs help.” Haseul hadn’t felt this helpless in years, but now, as she sobbed and held Vivi in her arms, she was wrapped in a familiar guilt. A familiar panic. How could this happen again?

Rubble scattered behind her and she jerked her head, only to breathe a sigh of relief when she saw Yerim running towards the two of them, her eyes wide.

“Oh my god,” the younger girl said, voice tight, and Haseul reached up, grabbing her and holding her tight.

“Teleport us back now! I’m holding Vivi, she’ll come too!”

“R-right! Jiwoo is waiting for us!”

Teleportation always made Haseul sick to her stomach, but she hardly even noticed it this time as she clutched Vivi closer and pressed her forehead to hers, willing Vivi to hold on just a little while longer.

Sure enough, Jiwoo was there when they landed back in the hideout, and she immediately ran forward, biting her lip and narrowing her eyes with concentration. Her hands glowed as she brought them to Vivi’s body, and a bead of sweat rolled down her temple.

“This... This is really bad,” she said softly, not looking away as she slowly moved her hands over the wounds, her fingers twitching and moving in a skilled, practiced fashion. “She’s lost a lot of blood. I can heal the wounds but I can’t restore her blood count.”

“Please, you can’t let her die.” Haseul’s voice broke as she spoke and Jiwoo bowed her head, eyes welling up with tears. Haseul was the leader of the group. She was level-headed, experienced, and mature. No one had ever seen her like this, because she’d never let them see her emotional side. But now that it was on display for everyone to see, the situation was heightened. The Haseul that was usually so level-headed, keeping the group’s spirits high, was terrified. And that made everyone else scared too.

“I’ll do everything I can to save her,” Jiwoo said, closing her eyes and channeling all of her healing power to her fingertips. Now was not the time to panic. She had a job to do. “I promise.”

-

“Mom! Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom!” Yeojin’s voice echoed through the house as she ran down the stairs and barreled into the kitchen, face flushed pink with excitement. Haseul laughed, throwing up a quick force-field shield against the ground as the little girl slipped on the tile floor before regaining her balance and running over to her side. She’d already grown so much since Haseul had promised her cousin, Yeojin’s biological mom, that she would raise her as her own.

“What did I tell you about running on the tile with your socks on?”

“You said I’ll get hurt. But Mom! I made something cool with Momma for you!” Yeojin grinned, wide-eyed and innocent with her hands behind her back, and Haseul smiled affectionately, turning down the stove and wiping her hands on her apron as she turned to her adopted daughter.

“And what’s that, Yeojin?”

“Look!” The six-year-old thrust a little decorated frame forward. Inside was a drawing of Haseul in her apron and Vivi with her signature pink glasses, with Yeojin in the middle, wearing her favorite pink dress and holding both their hands. In neat lettering, she’d written “my family” at the top of the drawing, then again in glitter gel on the padded frame. “Do you like it?”

“I love it!” Haseul beamed and took the frame, touching her heart. “Did you do this all by yourself?”

“Yes!” Yeojin turned to see Vivi walked into the room, then looked back up at Haseul sheepishly. “Well, Momma helped a little. But mostly by myself!”

Laughing, Haseul gave the girl a hug, sending a wink to Vivi over her shoulder. “I like it either way. Great job, I’m impressed!” As she stood up, she smiled at her girlfriend. “Great job to you too.”

“I was just a helper,” Vivi said, smiling as she walked over to the pair. “Yeojin did all the hard work.”

“See?”

“I see!” The timer went off and Haseul gently put the frame down on the counter. “Are my hard workers ready for dinner? It’s Yeojin’s favorite!”

“Yay! Spicy rice cake!” Yeojin let out a yell of happiness, making both her mothers laugh.

“Go wash your hands and sit down then, Bean,” Vivi said, and Yeojin pouted.

“I’m not a bean!”

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry. Go wash up then, Jinnie.”

“Okay!” Yeojin ran out of the room and Haseul turned to give Vivi a kiss on the cheek. Vivi raised her eyebrows, grinning.

“What was that for?”

“Can I not kiss the woman I love?”

“You’re a sap, Love.” Vivi gave her a quick kiss. “Thanks for making dinner while I played with Yeojin.”

“Anything for the ones I love!”

“Are you in a sappy mood today?”

Haseul shook her head and smiled. “No, I’m just feeling happy and affectionate today. It’s nice to spend time together as a family. All we need now is to get married, you know.”

“Are you proposing to me, Haseul?”

“Maybe. Want to marry me, Kahei?”

“Sure, why not?”

-

Haseul blinked awake to the sound of a closing door somewhere. Her arms were folded under her head, resting on the bed, and her neck was bent in a weird position that left it cramping as she sat up, groaning at the pain. When had she fallen asleep?

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” Jiwoo said, giving Haseul a small smile as she walked over to the bed.

“When did I fall asleep?”

“About an hour ago. I didn’t want to wake you up because you looked like you needed the sleep.”

Haseul looked at Vivi, who was still pale and breathing slowly. She hadn’t moved at all since they cleaned her off and put her in her bed. “Is she doing okay?”

“She’s stabilized and I’m making sure she stays that way. It’s up to her to survive now.” Jiwoo watched as Haseul gently took Vivi’s hand. “What were you dreaming about?”

Jumping a bit, the older girl glanced back at Jiwoo. “Why?”

“You were crying and smiling in your sleep. I was just curious.”

“Oh.” Haseul swallowed and looked back down at Vivi’s limp hand in her own. Her heart hurt more than anything else as the memories came flooding back, leaving a heavy burden on her shoulders. “I was just dreaming of a time before.... The law.”

-

Hours later, when the room was dark and most of the other women had been sent out to try and keep the terrorist group from striking again, Haseul held Vivi’s limp, cold hand in her own and cried. Everything that she’d bottled up over the course of the year came flooding out as she sobbed, hunched over the bed.

“Kahei,” she whispered, even though no one else was there to hear. It was a name she hadn’t used since that fateful day, but it tumbled out naturally now. Vivi’s real name. “I had a dream about Yeojin again.” At the mention of their daughter, there was a twitch, and Haseul’s heart surged with hope. “Kahei, please. You have to wake up. For me and for Yeojin. I can’t live in this world without you.”

There was no response, and Haseul’s heart fell into her stomach as she rested her head against Vivi’s shoulder. “It’s okay, take your time. I’ll stay here until you wake up.”

-

“Mom! Mom, Momma, what’s happening?” Yeojin’s voice was high and full of fear as she held tightly to her parent’s hands, shivering between them. All three of them were hidden inside a small closet in the bedroom, listening as the sound of gunfire echoed through the neighborhood and someone slammed against the door. It had only been days since the announcement of the ban on superheros and superpowers came over the TV, shattering their normal life. Vivi had been hopeful that, since they weren’t technically heroes anymore, they’d be left alone. But that was not the case.

“Open up, you hero scum!”

“I’m scared.”

“Shh.” Haseul had long since put up a shield around them in the closet, and now she wrapped her arms around Yeojin tighter. “It’s going to be okay.”

“Haseul,” Vivi whispered, “they’re gathering at the door.” She had taken off her glasses and was now looking through the house, out into the neighborhood. Her eyes glowed pink as she used her powers. “Some of them are our neighbors.”

“Our neighbors? Why?” Haseul shook her head, incredulous. “We’ve never been anything but nice!”

“I don’t know, but they’re there. I think the government has been spreading some sort of anti-hero propaganda. They also announced all the secret identities of known heroes today-.” The door slammed open and Yeojin began to cry. Quickly, Haseul put her hand over the girl’s mouth and strengthened her shield around them.

“Pink Watcher, Miss Shield, we know you’re here!”

Heart pounding, Haseul turned to look at her fiancee. Vivi’s eyes were wide and panicked. Those were their old hero names, from before they’d settled down to raise Yeojin. “What should we do,” Haseul mouthed, and Vivi shook her head, out of ideas. They couldn’t hide forever, and from the sound of it, they wouldn’t be able to talk their way out of this one. They would probably have to fight their way out.

Crashing came from the hallway and the sound of destruction filled the house, adding to the loud yelling that seemed to surround the closet. Haseul knew they only had one choice, even if she didn’t like it. “We’re going to have to run. You hold Yeojin, she’s still small enough to carry on your back. We’ll go to my parent’s farm. We should be safe for at least a little while there.”

“Okay.” Vivi stood up and Haseul followed suit, helping her pick up Yeojin and put her on her back. After Yeojin was secure and holding on tight, her eyes wide and scared, Haseul strengthened her shield one last time and the three burst from the room. Immediately, bullets began to fly, but they bounced off the shield as Haseul led them down the stairs and out the back door. The house had been ransacked and destroyed, all the family photos littering the ground and graffiti on the walls. Haseul was able to look over her shoulder at the lettering on the side of the house as they ran, and her stomach turned.

Die Hero Scum.

This was it. The world had changed, and there would be no going back now. Now, they had to learn how to survive.

-

“Kahei, do you remember when we were going to get married? Why didn’t we do that?” Haseul brushed Vivi’s hair back from her face and shook her head. “I don’t want you to die yet. I wanted to marry you, and raise a family with you. The law got in the way, but... I still want to marry you. I can’t imagine my life without you. I regret not marrying you sooner. I’m sorry, for everything.”

-

They saw the smoke before they saw the barn. For weeks they’d traveled, avoiding well-known areas and covering their faces, only to find the farm destroyed. The barn was on fire, billowing smoke up into the sky, and the rest of the place had been ransacked and covered in anti-hero graffiti. Shaking, Haseul made her way into the main house, only for her heart to break immediately, sending her running back outside. Her parents had been surprised in their bed. They never stood a chance.

“Why?” She turned to look at Vivi, tears flowing down her cheeks. Vivi and Yeojin were also crying, Yeojin sobbing into Vivi’s shoulder as she held the little girl tight. “Why would they do this? They weren’t doing anything wrong! They were retired! Why are they chasing us? We’ve never hurt or killed anyone! We worked for the government! We never did anything wrong.”

“The world has gone mad,” Vivi said slowly, pulling Haseul into a hug. For a while, they all stood there, crying and holding each other tight. They were tired, hungry, and now, hopeless. How could they survive in a world like this?

Finally, Haseul took a deep breath and pulled away. “I’ll see if they left any food in the cabinets. If so, we can stay here for the night. I doubt they’ll hit the same place twice.”

“How about you let me check the cabinets,” Vivi said, putting a hand on Haseul’s shoulder. “I know you want to give your parents a proper burial.”

Swallowing, Haseul looked back at the house where her parents lay. A weight settled heavily on her shoulders as she wiped her face, willing herself not to cry again. “Okay. Keep Yeojin close. I won’t be long.”

Haseul chose a spot near the pastures, where she knew her parents liked to sit and watch the sun rise. There, she used her shield as a shovel, melding the force-field into a curved, sharp surface. She had never thought she’d use her powers for something other than fighting or protecting, and yet she had no choice. So she got to work, not wanting to be out past dark.

She was filling in the last of the dirt when she heard it. Gunfire. Her heart stopped as she spun around and ran, melting her shields into armor just as she’d done as a hero. Screams reached her ears and she rounded the house just in time to see five armed men busting through the door, their guns blazing.

“Stop!”

“Yeojin!”

Haseul’s blood ran cold. Then she boiled over and her shields changed into sharp knives for the first time, plunging their way through the bodies of the men as she ran past them inside. Five bodies dropped behind her as she stopped, staring in horror at the sight in front of her. Yeojin was limp and covered in blood, cradled in Vivi’s arms. She was desperately trying to cover the wounds with her hand, screaming for Yeojin to wake up and apologizing to her over and over for not being able to protect her. The world came crashing down as Haseul fell to her knees beside her daughter and checked her pulse.

Nothing. Yeojin was gone. Slumping over, she began to sob, clutching her daughter’s body even though she knew she couldn’t bring her back. Vivi was sobbing now too, loud and heartbroken, like nothing Haseul had ever heard as she leaned against Haseul, her entire body going shuddering with the force of her cries. She’d been shot too, and she was losing blood, but she didn’t even seem to notice as she held Yeojin.

“It should have been me,” she wailed, “She reached out for me but I couldn’t get there in time. I couldn’t do anything!”

Haseul sat back and touched her daughter’s face, gently running her fingers over her soft cheeks and closing the little girl’s eyes despite her blood-covered hands. Seven was too young to die. Too young to see the horrible reality of the world. Her tears landed on Yeojin’s face as she unfastened the girl’s favorite necklace, a silver chain with three charms: a deer, a bird, and a frog. One for each of them. As, she held Yeojin’s tiny body in her arms, she whispered her own apologies into the girl’s ear, hoping that she heard them somehow. Just one more time, she wanted Yeojin to hear her say that she loved her, and that she was sorry.

If only she hadn’t been out in the field. If only she hadn’t left them alone. If only they hadn’t adopted Yeojin. She had just been a normal human. She could have survived if it wasn’t for them. “It’s not your fault,” she said as she wrapped her arm around Vivi, the weight on her shoulders growing heavier as she cried. “I should have never left the two of you unprotected.”

-

“Haseul?” Jungeun’s voice rang in the quiet room as she stepped inside, her wings tucked tightly down behind her as she gave the older girl a little smile. “Sorry if I startled you. I wanted to come check on you and Vivi.”

Haseul sighed and sat up, her hand still in Vivi’s. It was now the morning of the second day, and she was exhausted. “She’s stable and she’s gotten warmer. But she’s still not waking up. I’m worried.” Worried was an understatement. She was terrified, but she couldn’t admit it. Jungeun pressed her lips together as she walked over to the bed, her wings drooping like they only did when she was upset.

“We’re all really worried. But we’re worried about you too. Have you gotten any sleep?”

“A little.”

Jungeun didn’t seem to believe her. “Really? You look exhausted.”

“I’ve been having nightmares,” Haseul said truthfully, looking back down at Vivi. “It’s hard to sleep.”

“I see.”

The door opened, and Haseul looked up to see Heejin and Hyunjin walk in. Immediately, they came over to the bed and Heejin wrapped her in a tight hug as Hyunjin took Vivi’s other hand. It was relieving, if only a little, to see the girls Haseul had started this whole journey with. They’d found Haseul and Vivi after their tragedy, bloody and broken, and had taken them into their little group, becoming their new family. It was because of them that they’d started living again, devoting their life to saving the lives of others. Only Heejin and Hyunjin knew the truth about Haseul and Vivi’s background, so they would understand how devastated Haseul felt.

“I’m so sorry we’re only just now getting here,” Heejin said, still holding her tight. She seemed on the verge of crying, but she was holding it in. “We were out on an assignment with Hyejoo and Jinsoul when everything happened, and they immediately sent us with Chaewon to go find the terrorists. We only just got back.”

“Did you get them?” Haseul knew her voice was more weak and hoarse than usual, and Hyunjin sent her a worried glance when she heard it, but neither of them commented on it.

“We got them. They wont be hurting anyone else. At least, not that faction,” Hyunjin said, her eyes darkening. “It feels like there’s more of those assholes every day.”

“It’s because the world’s gone to hell,” Jungeun commented, shaking her head. “We’re doing all we can.”

“Is there anything you need from us, Haseul?” Heejin asked, concern laced in her voice. “Anything at all? We’re worried about you, really. You need to get some rest. We can get Jiwoo to take care of the nightmares for you.”

Haseul shook her head, tightening her grip on Vivi’s hand. “No. I can’t leave until she wakes up.”

The three women exchanged glances, but Haseul ignored them, focused on Vivi. Had she just moved?

“Okay, then,” Hyunjin said slowly, patting Vivi’s shoulder gently before backing away. “We’ll leave you alone. But please take care of yourself, Haseul. Everything is going to be okay.”

She didn’t really believe that, but Haseul nodded anyway.

“And stay strong,” Heejin added, giving Haseul one last hug before she joined the other girls at the end of the bed. “We’re rooting for you, Vivi. And we love you. Both.”

Haseul smiled a bit at this. “Thank you. I appreciate your support.”

“Of course.”

When the door shut behind them, Haseul slowly pulled the silver chain necklace out from under her shirt and rubbed her thumb over the bird charm. Half of the frog charm gleamed in the rising sun, and she reached up to pull Vivi’s necklace from under her shirt, revealing the other half of the frog and the deer.

“This way, Yeojin will always be with both of us,” Vivi had said as she cut the charm in half. Since then, neither of them had taken off the charms, despite the fact that they’d rusted and faded slightly over time. It was hard to take good care of something when you were constantly on the run, but they tried their best.

The charms were all they had left of their daughter.

“When you wake up,” Haseul said quietly, leaning in to kiss Vivi’s forehead. She felt warmer, and that was a good sign. She just had to hope. “Let’s get married. Just like we said we would.”

-

When they’d first joined Hyunjin and Heejin on the road, Vivi and Haseul had both been aloof, scared to get close or trust anyone. But slowly, as the other women began to join, they started to open themselves up again. They weren’t the only ones with tragedy in the background.

Heejin had been living her life as a successful vet, using her powers to speak to the animals and figure out their illnesses or issues. She’d never even been a hero, yet when the government propaganda started, the town and her own family had turned against her and she’d only escaped because Hyunjin showed up and saved her just in time. Hyunjin had been on the run herself, but when she saw Heejin cowering beside her overturned car with three people looming over her, she’d decided to help. Her poison claws had left them paralyzed, and ever since then, Hyunjin and Heejin had been on the run together.

Jiwoo had been a nurse who saved lives, only to have hers threatened. Sooyoung only survived because she could manipulate her townspeople in their minds long enough to get away, but her sister wasn’t so lucky. Jungeun never had a chance to hide her wings, making her an outcast since birth. Jinsoul had been forced to hide in a lake for days on end to escape, only surviving because she could make an air bubble around her head. Chaewon and Hyejoo had been current heroes, only to be accused of espionage by the government and forced to go into hiding. They were lucky they even got out, as other official heroes were turning up dead every day. Yerim, the last to join the group, had lost her entire family after being outed as a hero.

Everyone had scars and pain in their past, and when Haseul saw that, she couldn’t push them away. Instead, she became their leader, forcing herself to push her own grief aside so that she could take care of the group. Her decision added more weight to her shoulders, but she dealt with it, because she didn’t want any of the others to have to do it. She didn’t want anyone else to have to suffer.

-

On the morning of the third day, Vivi finally woke up. As soon as she shifted in the bed, letting out a small groan, Haseul jumped to her feet, leaning over the bed with wide, hopeful eyes. She watched with bated breath as the older woman blinked and moved, stretching out her legs and letting out a little whine before her eyes opened all the way. Relief washed over Haseul’s shoulders as she let out the breath she’d been holding and began to cry, wrapping her arms around Vivi’s shoulders.

“Your awake! Oh my god, you’re awake. I was so scared, you have no idea how scared I was.”

Slowly, Vivi reached up, hugging Haseul in return with weak limbs. “What happened?” Her voice was hoarse and Haseul moved away, touching her face gently. She could hardly believe this was happening.

“You were hurt really bad. Jiwoo was able to heal you but you’d lost a lot of blood. You’ve been out for three days.”

“Three?” Vivi blinked as she took Haseul’s hand. “Oh, that’s right. We were ambushed.” She swallowed, shivering slightly, and it suddenly struck home just how weak she looked. “I’m cold, Haseul.”

Immediately, Haseul jumped up, her heart pounding. She knew she probably looked a little crazy with the dark circles under her eyes and her hair and clothes mussed and askew, but she didn’t care. “Let me get some more blankets and grab Jiwoo. I can also get you some water and food. Would you like that?” At Vivi’s nod, she turned and jogged out of the room, running into the kitchen. There, the rest of the girls were eating breakfast, and they all turned to look at her with wide eyes when she burst into the room. “Vivi’s awake!”

“Vivi’s awake?”

“Oh, thank goodness, I was so scared!”

“That’s great!”

Jiwoo stood up, rolling up her sleeves. “I’ll go make sure she’s doing okay and that her vitals are stable. Sooyoung, can you come help me?”

“And she’s cold,” Haseul blurted, and Heejin jumped from her seat.

“I’ll grab blankets!”

“Let me get her some food, I bet she’s hungry.”

“Oh, and water! I bet she needs water!”

Haseul watched as the girls jumped up, all ready to help and all just as relieved as she was that Vivi was alive. Then, once again, tears began to roll down her face as she realized that she and Vivi were no longer alone in the world. They had a new family and wonderful friends who loved them and supported them. As she cried, tears a mix of relief and sadness, Hyunjin pulled her into a tight hug.

“Everything is going to be okay,” she said, and this tie, Haseul believed her.

-

Even with the help of Jiwoo’s healing powers, recovery was a long process. Some damage could not be undone, and Vivi was still very weak. She slept long hours and needed help doing even the smallest of things. But she was alive, and Haseul was happy to stay by her side through the process, there for whatever Vivi or Jiwoo needed from her.

One night, as they got into bed, Vivi turned to her with a serious face. “Haseul, there’s something I’ve been meaning to bring up to you.”

Blinking, Haseul sat up and propped herself up on her elbow. “What’s that?”

“When I was... asleep. For those three days. I had dreams, where I heard you talking to me. Were you really talking to me?”

“I did talk to you. Quite a lot, actually.”

Biting her lip, Vivi picked at her blanket. “So, um. Did you happen to tell me that you were going to marry me when I woke up?”

As she remembered everything she’d said, Haseul’s face flushed. “I-I did.”

“Did you mean it?”

Her heart skipped a beat as Vivi looked at her, dark eyes earnest. This was the first time they’d talked about marriage in over a year. For so long, they’d been scared. Scared of the future, scared to love, and scared to go forward. They’d been attached to the past, the perfect life that they had before all this happened. Talking about marriage had felt... wrong, without Yeojin there. But now, Haseul swallowed and squared her shoulders, reaching over to take her girlfriend’s hand. She was finally ready to move forward.

“I did. I meant every word I said. When I thought I might lose you.... I was so scared, but I also regretted never marrying you. All I want is to be with you for the rest of my life. I want you to be my wife, because I love you and I believe in us. No matter what the future has in store, I’m ready to face it as long as I’m with you. I’m ready to face this world if you’re beside me. I don’t have a ring or anything to make this official, but will you marry me, Kahei?”

A smile spread over Vivi’s face and she threw her arms around Haseul, knocking her back against the bed. “Yes, I’ll marry you!” As she pulled away, tears glistened in her eyes. “You know, as my life flashed before my eyes, when I almost died.... My main regret was not marrying you. We should have gotten married so long ago.” The silver chain fell out from her shirt and she smiled, affectionately touching her half of the frog chain. “I used to think that it would be... disrespectful if we got married after everything. To Yeojin, I mean. I used to think that I didn’t deserve to be happy anymore, because Yeojin didn’t get to live a full life because of me. But now that I’ve had time to think about it.... I think this is what she would have wanted. She was such a sweet girl, she would never have wanted us to be unhappy. I don’t know if I can go back to being Kahei. I’ve gotten so used to being Vivi. But I think I can finally move on.” The tears spilled over as she spoke, and Haseul pulled her back into a hug, holding her tight.

As they cried, holding each other, Haseul felt a small hand touch her face. It was brief and when she opened her eyes, nothing as there. But she’d felt it, and as Vivi locked eyes with her, she knew that she’d felt it too.

“Was that...?”

There was no real explanation for it. But Haseul felt herself smile as a weight lifted off her shoulders. “I think Yeojin just gave us her permission to be happy again.”

-

When Haseul had first imagined her wedding, she’d had a lot of dreams. She’d wanted a beautiful venue, expensive decorations, and a huge party. She’d never imagined that she would end up getting married in the back of a hideout, with makeshift decorations made out of rubble and whatever flowers the girls would find. She’d never imagined that she’d have to hand-sew her dress and scrounge for the wedding food.

But when she stood at the end of the makeshift aisle in her plain white dress, freshly healed flowers wrapped in plastic in her hand with the women that had become her new family grinning happily at her, she realized that she didn’t care if it wasn’t the wedding of her dreams. She was happy anyway.

Jungeun stood at the end of the aisle, dressed in a suit that was too big for her with her wings perked up and unfurled, and as Haseul approached her, she gave her a huge smile. “You look great.”

“Thanks, so do you.”

Heejin strummed her guitar and Hyunjin beside her started to sing a traditional wedding song, and Vivi stepped out from behind the white sheet Jiwoo and Sooyoung had hung up the day before. Haseul’s breath escaped her as she watched Vivi smile and move to the aisle, tucking her hair behind her ear. She was wearing a long lace veil, and her dress was longer than Haseul’s, touching the ground as she walked. Somehow, Chaewon had gotten her hands on some pearls and gems, apparently, because the white dress glittered and shined even without any light to reflect. She was beautiful, and Haseul was the most lucky woman in the world.

As Vivi moved into position in front of her, Haseul grinned, her heart pounding. “Wow,” she said, because she couldn’t get anything else out, and Vivi giggled, taking both of Haseul’s hands after handing off their flowers to Jiwoo.

“Wow to you too.”

Jungeun cleared her throat, interrupting them. “Friends, family. We are gathered here together today to celebrate the wedding of our dear Vivi and Haseul.” Her voice wavered a little bit as she tried to remember the rest of her speech. “Um, we before god....”

“You know, you can just skip that part,” Hyunjin hissed, making everyone laugh. Blushing, Jungeun shrugged.

“Okay. Our brides have prepared their own vows. Haseul, would you like to start?”

Taking a deep breath, Haseul nodded. “Yes. Vivi, we’ve been through a lot together. This year marks the tenth year since we shared our first kiss together. Back then, we were young heroes without a care in the world. A lot has happened since then, both good and bad, but because of you, I’ve continued to live and look towards the future. As long as I have you, I have hope. Vivi, I promise to always take care of you and stay by your side. I promise to always have your back. I promise to always look out for you. I promise to love you in sickness and in health. No matter what happens to us, I promise that I will always be your loyal wife, and that nothing will ever tear us apart. I love you. Always.”

Smiling, Vivi squeezed her hands. “Haseul, you said most of the things I wanted to say already, so you kind of stole my speech.” She giggled as everyone laughed before continuing. “But I want you to know that I love you. Even after everything we’ve had to go through, I love you with my entire being. I’ve never lost my faith in you, and even if you think you did, you’ve never let me down. I’ve always been able to depend on you, ever since our hero days. I want you to know that you can depend on me too. I promise that I’ll always take care of you, and that I’ll always stay by your side. I promise that I’ll love you despite everything that comes our way. I promise to continue living by your side. And I promise to stay your loyal, loving wife until I draw my last breath. I love you, Haseul. And I always will.”

Tears pricked at the back of Haseul’s eyes, but she pushed them away. She’d already cried enough tears.

“Haseul, do you take Vivi to be your kinda lawfully wedded wife, for now and forever?”

“I do.”

“And Vivi, do you take Haseul to be your kinda lawfully wedded wife, for now and forever?”

“I do!”

“Great!” Jungeun clapped her hands. “By the power that was bestowed on me by the online class I took two days ago, I now pronounce you wife and wife! You both may now kiss the bride!”

Haseul didn’t have to be told twice. She cupped Vivi’s head in her hands and leaned in, kissing her passionately as Vivi pulled her in closer with her arms wrapped around her shoulders. All around them, the girls began to cheer and Heejin strummed her guitar loudly as Chaewon turned the light into glitter, making it fall down gently around them as they kissed. As Haseul pulled away, she laughed, her heart truly full and happy for the first time in what felt like forever.

“I love you,” she said, and then she turned to the others. The girls, the women, her family. “I love you all too,” she said, and she meant it.

“We love you both! Congratulations!”

“Kiss again, I didn’t get a good photo!”

“Chaewon, I’m gonna kill you, I have glitter in my mouth!”

“Who’s problem is that, Hyunjin? Not mine!”

“Throw the bouquets, let’s see who gets married next!”

“Hey, Jinsoul we aren’t ready for that yet!”

The room exploded into lively, loud conversation, and Vivi moved closer, taking Haseul’s hand into her own and leaning her head on her shoulder. “I’m so glad we made it this far,” she said quietly, a smile on her lips. “I have hope for this world again.”

With light shoulders and bright eyes, Haseul looked up at the light coming in from the window. Perhaps it was her imagination, but there she saw the shadows of her past all smiling down at her, mixed in with the whispers of the future. And she smiled.

“So do I.”

[dark-and-kawaii]

🍁Shigaraki x Reader🍁

🎃Spoopyween is over and Ya Boi Kiwi is sad, but I hope you all had a spooky day and ate lots of candy!!! My berries deserved to have a grand Halloween!!! Hehehe I hope some of you drank many dranks and took a shot for me!!! Hehehe🎃

“~Tomu~” You walked out of your bathroom in yet another costume, “How does this one look?”

Shigaraki continued to sit on your couch, unamused… “Just put one of my hands on your face and my coat and call it a night… I don’t understand why you need to try on all these outfits when i’m just going to destroy it…” He smirked at you from under his hood…

“Jeez some help you are, Tomu… Oh! I know!” You gathered his long coat in your arms and grabbed a few of his hands… “Be right back!”

Another five minutes passed and Shigaraki could finally hear the bathroom door open up, “It’s about damn ti-”

His voice was caught in his throat as you appeared with nothing on except two of his hands on your breasts, one covering your crouch, and his long black leather coat to top it off…

“~Ta da! What do you think, Tomu?” Winking at him, you awaited his reply but nothing was said… Instead, all Shigaraki did was stand from his spot…

“You should know better than to tease the League of Villains boss, ___… It’ll only lead to trouble…”

Ambling towards you, Shigaraki lifted his hand so he could grasp your neck… Centimeters away he was about to grip your neck with his pinky out, but before he could you jumped back in the bathroom and locked the door, slamming it in his face… “Not until after the halloween party!”

One of Shigaraki’s eyes were twitching violently… His fingers trembling with rage… “...____…” He could hear your once cute giggles from the other side… “Open this damn door before i turn it to dust!”

Swinging open the door you saw Shigaraki’s eyes were filled with exasperation until he notice the fuzzy bunny ears atop your head… “I’m readdddyyyy~!”

Shigaraki’s hand dropped to his side, “I liked the other costume better.”

“Yeah, me too… But i don’t think you’d like the attention i’d get in it. This is a bit more concealing.”

Shigaraki’s eyes wandered over your body, he took note of the tight one piece and stockings you wore with it, a sexy bunny indeed… “Barely… Go to your stupid party so you can come back to me.”

Bending over to pick up his coat from the bathroom floor you turned around to look at him while wiggling your behind, “What are you talking about? You’re coming with me, silly!” Draping his coat over yourself you locked arms with him, “I need the League of Villains boss to keep me safe!” You pouted up at him but he turned his body to break your hold on his arm.

“No. Don’t be stupid. Someone will call the cops and then it’s game over for me… For us…”

“No it wouldn’t be!!!! It’s Halloween!!! No one would even care or notice!!!” You stomped your foot on the ground like a child, hoping it would do the trick.

“No.”

….

“You know…. If you don’t go and keep me company… Some guy might try to get me alone and have his way with me… Your girl… Your property… Someone else might touch me an-”

Placing father on his face, Shigaraki snaked his arm around your neck in the process, “They’d die before they could even make eye contact with you… Now take me to this stupid party.”

At the Halloween party, Shigaraki clung to one of the walls with his back and foot resting on it, hands in his pocket… He kept a close eye on you as you mingled with your friends and everytime a male approached you he would slam his foot against the wall and made eye contact with them immediately… Shgiaraki’s red eyes would pierce through them until they finally got the hint to leave you the hell alone…

“...Damn bunny costume…” Shigaraki scratched his neck ever so slightly, it was clear that it was time to go…

Kicking himself off the wall, Shigaraki moseyed on over to you…, “____. We’re leaving.”

“Awhhh really!? Fiiiine fine! Just let me get your coat so i don’t freeze to death outside!”

“Hurry it up…”

Skipping up the stairs you went to grab hs coat as he waited downstairs by the front door… He hated this… waiting… but more so all the eyes that monitored your every move…

As you entered the bedroom that held everyone’s coats, you happily skipped over to yours… erm… Shigaraki’s and took it from the hanger. A finger tapped your bare shoulder, and it caused you to turn around. You were expecting to see Shigaraki but instead it was strange male… “Uhm… Can i help you?”

“You’re way beyond sexy, wanna lock the door and have some fun?” With a wide grin he winked at you…

“N-No… I- I’m with someone, and he’s waiting for me downstairs…” Clinging to Shigaraki’s jacket you could feel your legs go numb… There was something off about this guy…

“It’s totally fine! I’m sure he wouldn’t mind! I already went and locked the door anyway, might as well have some fun before i have to unlock it, right?” He grabbed your arm and wrappe his hand around your waist. You struggled to break free from him and even tried to punch him in the face, but he was much stronger than you… Thanks to drinking your quirk was useless too…

Closing your eyes so your tears wouldn’t fall you screamed out in a panic, “Tenko!!!” Using his real name so know one would know it’s him, you called for help but to no avail…

The stranger managed to unzip the back of your one pieced but before he could go further you heard him gag a few times and then the room was silent…

Opening up your eyes you saw that the stranger had been destroyed… Decayed… “T-Tomura…” You embraced him and buried your face into his hoodie. Carefully, Shigaraki wrapped his arms around keeping his hands in fists…

“We need to go before someone sees us next to this pile of garbage…”

You couldn’t agree more but you were still struck with fear and your legs refused to move… “I can’t move, Tomura… I’m sorry… I’ll take the blame or come up with something…”

“As if i would leave you here…. Don’t be foolish.” Bending his knees, Shigaraki picked you up bridal style and carried you down the stairs and past the front door…

Outside it was nipply, and you shivered even though you had his coat wrapped around you like a blanket…

“Some Halloween… I’m sorry we came here Tomura…”

“Make it up to me by wearing my hands again, i liked that…”

Nuzzling his chest you smiled cozily, “I think that would help me take my mind off things too..”

…

You felt Shigaraki’s grip tighten on you…

“??? Tomura?”

…

“This is a stupid holiday and i hate that someone else laid their hands on you… But Happy Halloween.”

Relaxing in his arms, you slowly closed your eyes and snuggled into him best you could... “Happy Halloween, Tomu.”

~ Love Kiwi xoxo

[mybukz]

Fiction: To Where He Belongs by Peter Soh

Photo by Drew Graham on Unsplash To Where He Belongs By Peter Soh

Someone blared his horns twice at the front gate. I knew it must be the postman. Only he would do that—honking twice to alert someone that he had a letter. On some days he would pass me a letter and, sometimes, a wad of letters. They were usually nothing but updates about my pathetic account balances or the tiny growth of my retirement pension. The number didn’t make me feel any better or hopeful; the figures were all too small to remind me of the many more decades I must endure and suffer before I could even shrug off my responsibilities of being a decent and productive human being and to die with dignity.

And if the letters were to be delivered nearing the end of a month, I knew they were the mandatory bills to be paid and probably some speeding tickets to be cleared before being issued a summon from the local court the next month.

Life was never easy since my parents passed away in an accident. I was left with a memorial tablet in the house, a younger sister who was still studying, and a mountain of debts. I was forced to quit school and work as a waiter at a high-end Japanese restaurant because I knew how to speak English. Despite the long hours standing and bruising my knees constantly having to kneel on the tatami mat while serving the food, I got to take home tips and leftover food.

“Mr Tan, you have a parcel today!” The postman gave me his usual breezy smile. I loathed hearing the honks from him, but all I could do was put on my practiced smile and quickly jostled the key into the padlock as if I was looking forward to receiving the letters from him.

“Yes, coming. Here I come.” I couldn’t find the right key whenever I was antsy. I didn’t like to keep people waiting and definitely detested receiving another ominous missive.

“It’s all right. Take your time,” the postman replied me politely while holding the big grey parcel in his hand.

“Urgh. Finally!” I opened the gate and was wondering what the game was this time. I didn’t welcome the parcel.

There was a note with it. It read:

Dear Thomas, I hope this cheers you up and brightens your gloomy days. Have faith that things will eventually be alright. Good things will come to those who have patience and perseverance. Best of luck.

It was from her. Nancy. She had stayed in New Zealand ever since she dated her then course mate, who was, now, her husband. She had always been the lucky girl, the one with a silver spoon in her mouth, and who travelled around the world as her leisure activity.

The teachers liked her because she was a brilliant and respectful student, but I conjectured that the teachers did so partly because her father was the chairman of the Parent-Teacher Association in our school. Who doesn’t like to be spotted with the rich, I always thought.

That day in school, I waited for her.

“Hey Nancy, I am Thomas. Can I speak to you for a while?” Never had I thought that one day I would talk to a highbrow person. It had been during recess, and she was sitting under the yellow flame trees with her friends.

“Sure!” She smiled warmly. She looked at her friends before going over to where I was standing. I was shocked by her friendly persona because I thought she was a snob and would say no to my request.

“I am the president of the modern dance club—"

She interrupted me. “I know. Who doesn’t know the hip-hop star in our school.”

“Thanks.” I became shy when a girl praised me.

“What’s the matter?” Nancy asked.

“Oh yeah. You know the principal is retiring soon and we are going to perform some dances as usual.”

“Yes, I know. I’ve seen you guys practising diligently almost every day at the hall.”

“Thank you. But I need your help.” I started to be serious and looked into her eyes.

“What can I do? You don’t expect me to dance with you guys, do you? I can’t dance at all.” Nancy knitted her brows.

“No,no. Of course not. Our dance club is preparing a nyonya dance this year as the principal is a baba. Not that we are preparing one. You know, we only know how to spin our heads on the floor, but the teachers asked us to do one.”

“So, you want me to dance the nyonya dance?” Nancy winced.

“No, no. We managed to find some girls to learn the steps from the internet. But we couldn’t get the costumes because none of the elders want to loan their costumes to us. I heard that you are a nyonya.”

“I see. I suppose no one will lend you their costumes. They are expensive, and they will bury you alive if they find just a dash of stain from your chicken curry rice. You know, the food we always get after the performance. That watery curry. Urgh, I loathe it.” Nancy rolled her eyes and I started laughing at her drama.

“You should join the drama club.”

“Anyway, how many sets of sarong kebaya you want? My family inherits quite a handsome number of them. Not that anyone in my family is wearing them. I can loan it to your girls.”

“I need six sets! Oh my, thank you so much for your help, Nancy!” I exclaimed in delight and heaved a sigh of relief. Finally, the arduous task of getting those archaic costumes was settled.

Everything went smooth on that day, and Nancy and I became good friends. I picked up more English words from her, and I began to know more about her. She was not that icy and cocky as I would think. She was vivacious and helpful.

*

I lifted a yellow kebaya out of the parcel. Nancy’s favourite colour. She said yellow represented hope and she loved the yellow flame trees. It was a magnificent view whenever the wind lifted the yellow flowers and laid them on the school compound. I had seen it. Our school had a stretch of those trees. It was, indeed, breathtaking.

She still remembered me. The guy who danced hip-hop. The guy who looked for her help to settle the costumes. The guy who learnt English from her. The guy who lost his parents at the age of 16. The guy who avoided people ever since he dropped out of school. The guy with depression and needed medication.

“I couldn’t sleep last night. I wanted to die,” I remembered texting Nancy a few days before she left for New Zealand.

“Why aren’t you on medication? Do you know it brings pain to people who love you? Stop wallowing in the darkness again. Stand up!” I could feel that she was starting to get impatient this time.

“You know I can’t control it! Do you think I choose to be in pain?” I blasted my anger at Nancy. I was impulsive and easily annoyed ever since depression had me.

“Then take your medicine!”

“I hate the side effect of the drug! It makes me thirsty all the time!”

“Stop giving excuses. I can only do so much. It tires me out whenever you try to gain sympathy. I can’t be supportive 24/7.”

“I don’t need your sympathy. I never wanted it. Take care!”

“Take care too.”

We never texted each other since then. She flew to The Land of the Kiwis while I tried to survive each day. I was obstinate, refusing to take my medicine. I wanted to face the fear and outgrow the pain. I wanted to accept the fact that my parents were now gone even though it was a gruelling effort. I wanted to train my mind not to give in to the devils. I wanted to survive without the medicine—the one that gave me mediated euphoria. I wanted to be genuinely happy once again.

But I failed. I was drained, again and again. I was exhausted from the battles. I cried every night whenever my mind flashed the image of my parents dying in the most unexpected way. The act of pretending to be strong in front of my little sister was taking a toll on my fragile mind. I was reluctant to be a waiter. I wanted to be a dancer. I wanted to attend the best dancing school in London. I wanted to be like everyone else.

And sadly, this time she was not there for me anymore. She got exhausted. She got drained like me. I had no one to unload my repetitive stories and pains. I was told to take my medicine. I was told to stand on my own. I was told that I was a burden and no one liked it. I was sidelined in this happy-is-the-way-society. And I got kicked out by my only good friend.

And I never saw her again.

*

I carefully folded the kebaya and put it back into the box. I could tell that it was a masterpiece from the extensive embroideries. It featured the sunflower, a plant that means strength and positivity.

I drove to the nearest post office and requested a postal form. I copied down her address and submitted the parcel to the post.

I enclosed a note for her:

Dear Nancy, thank you for remembering me. I appreciate your kindness and support, but I would need a new start. One without you.

I left the post office with serenity because I knew that one day, I would meet a person who would never give up on me. And I know that I would overcome this battle with victory.

*

Peter Soh is an ambitious Malaysian writer whose stories are about darkness, pain, struggles, identity searching and what makes us a human.

[jflashandclash]

Attrition of Peace

Forty: Euna

Parka Fluff Hugs

(or: A Stony Disposition)

             Even the gods fear nothingness.

           Euna couldn’t place where she’d heard it before, or why her brain was slogging over it, but the words kept repeating like the mundane mantra of a school pledge—something you repeat everyday without really caring why. She stared off into Camp Half-Blood, where Phobetor had been severing people’s limbs as a timer to torment his little brother.

           Some uncomfortable part of her understood Phobetor’s absentmindedness. Some part of her agreed with Alabaster—or as much as she got out of Alabaster’s rant—that they should kill the unworthy god.

           Something she’d heard the plants whisper— the plants? farmers? worsphipers?--- slithered through her mind, They manufacture us in mass quantity until perfection is reached, while the unworthy and weak are tossed without concern, and the perfected are consumed by a thankless, thoughtless overseer.

           Demigods harvested like plants. Or plants harvested like demigods. That sounded like something stupid her English teacher would say about some book she’d say she read, and actually read through the glory of SparkNotes. Did the gods weed out their unwanted children, to force the others to grow stronger?

           Euna shook her head. What was wrong with her? She never had thoughts like that before. One of her favorite past times had been not thinking about things. Blank walls could be as captivating as the plot for Game of Thrones when you were good at zoning out.

           “I heard what happened to Joey.”

           Euna jumped. Apparently, she was still really good at zoning out.

           She’d been trying to listen to Thalia and Christiana—something about Lesedi waking up, and sound coming from inside the camp. And something about a dragon rolling in toilet paper? Christiana had left…

           When she focused her eyes on Thalia, she registered what Thalia had said.

           Joey.

           Euna opened her mouth to respond, and was confused to find she couldn’t. Her voice wouldn’t work. Her face felt warm, except for a tiny line of cold streaking down her cheek. At first, Euna thought it was just a side effect of such a weird sleep schedule and constant fighting and running, but…

           For the first time since they’d left Santiago’s horrible Mayan temple, Euna could feel a tear leak out, like her body needed to emit a worn down, desperate sigh.

           Thalia’s stunning blue eyes softened with understanding. Euna wondered how many sisters this huntress had buried.

           Thalia didn’t try to say she was sorry or something stupid like that. Instead, she pulled Euna into a tight hug.

           Euna felt the fluff of Thalia’s silver parka compress against her face. The fur lining was so warm. The material acted like a muffler, and Euna enjoyed how the sounds of the Romans attending to bodies and the sounds of a waking camp all quieted to a murmur of fluffy silence.

           Euna patted Thalia’s back with one hand. Without realizing it, she’d left her other on the pommel of Backbiter.

           “Hey, if you ever need anything, you know where I am,” Thalia said.

           “All over the wilderness,” Euna noted. Thalia smelled like the wild. “That narrows it down.”

           She’d meant the comment legitimately—there wasn’t a lot of wilderness left. But she realized how ridiculous it sounded when Thalia laughed.

           “I think I want to be with you,” Euna said.

           Thalia’s grip tensed. She stopped laughing.

           “Assuming the offer is still there,” Euna continued, “I don’t have a reason not to be a huntress anymore, and it sounds like a cool gig.”

           “You wanna be a huntress,” Thalia said like she was clarifying Euna’s comment, though Euna didn’t think there was much to clarify.

           “Yea.” Maybe Euna could find some peace like that.

           She thought about her father—how warm his face was when they were gardening and how stern it was when scolding. She didn’t want to see how he’d be without Joey around. Especially since Euna wouldn’t be able to replace Joey’s ambition and strength.

           She couldn’t go back to her old life after watching her sister die like that either. She couldn’t bother with school. After seeing the little taste of Santiago’s corpoerate meeting and his league, she could never be part of an office space. What if she zoned out during a holiday party and strangled everyone with the laurel and mistletoe because she was having flashbacks?[1]  

           Backbiter’s pommel became uncomfortably icy to Euna’s touch. She withdrew from Thalia. The world came back to its loud harshness: Romans shouting, confusion in Camp Half-Blood, injured screaming—

           Euna thought about how the Romans might come after her when this was done. “I guess it would be a good place for you to keep an eye on me too.”

           Thalia raised an eyebrow. “If you mean to keep you safe, sure. We take care of our own.”

           Someone shouted from behind Euna.

           Thalia made a face, then waved in return. “Looks like Lesedi’s up. That means the other campers are waking up. You should come—”

           “I’ll be over in a minute,” Euna said.

           Thalia nodded, her black, choppy hair dipping momentarily to cover her tiara. She squeezed Euna’s shoulder.

           Then she was gone, running back towards the others.

           Euna stood there, in the small patch of shadow between two floodlights, almost at the end of the strawberry fields. Something moved dimly in the shadow.

           There was a bustle of strawberries near the edge of the caution tape. When Euna focused on it, she could see a tiny, grey piglet staring at her through it.

           Despite Euna’s hatred of Phobetor, she knew how it felt to be pigballed and had some sympathy.

           But only enough to hold off for a second before drawing Backbiter. Maybe some people had qualms with killing cute things, but Euna could go for some pork belly from this jerk.

           The piglet huffed before melting into black tar.

           The tar warped and twisted upward until the minstrel-adorned, bird-skulled piccolo player stood before her with a hatchet.

           Someone yelped.

           The monster turned and Euna could see Alabaster and Pax nearby.

           Back by the barracks, none of the Romans or conscious Greeks seemed to see the God of Nightmares.

           He took a step closer to Alabaster, twisting his hatchet.

           The child of Hecate looked unarmed. She thought she’d seen him poof his staff earlier. Alabaster withdrew his card deck from his pocket, but neither he nor Pax looked ready for another fight. However, the head on Pax’s beltline looked ready to belt out a battle cry.

           “How dare you make me something cute,” Phobetor huffed at Alabaster.

           Pax looked more offended by that comment than scared. “Dude, how are we related?” he asked while stepping between the god and child of magic.

           Euna knew Pax was comfortable having dumb conversations with gods, but she’d rather be more practical.

           Euna lunged forward.

           Phobetor stumbled away from her, further beyond the caution tape. A disgruntled sound sputtered from his mouth, and she realized something valuable—he was afraid of her.

           Ikelos, twisted coward, one who refused to side with me to spite his brother, Backbiter hissed.

           Oh, now you can talk, Euna thought. But that didn’t matter. What mattered was collecting this god’s head.

           Phobetor held up his hands as she took a step forward.

           “Wait--!” Pax squeaked.

           Alabaster reached around Pax for her arm, probably to stop her from falling asleep beyond the camp’s boundaries.

           But nothing happened. She stepped into the caution tape and felt it stretch against her arms.

           Phobetor sputtered again, “Wait—young child of Demeter—your sister—don’t you want to see your sister again?”

           Euna wanted to call his bluff. Her sister was dead. Nothing the God of Nightmares could do would change that.

           “My dearest aunt said you should see Joey finish off her quest in Hera’s cabin. It will be quite the fun spectacle. I’ll let you in.”

           Although she didn’t see eyes in the kiwi bird skull, she could sense his gaze lingering on Backbiter’s blade.

           “Uh—we shouldn’t do anything my mom considers ‘fun,’” Pax whispered.

           Euna paused. What quest could Phobetor be talking about? The convoluted Traitor’s Prophecy could hardly be called a quest. But—

           Hera. Hera’s quest box. Where Hera wanted Joey to bring her the key to a happy marriage in exchange for her blessing Joey and Apollo’s… relationship? Euna felt slow when her mind clicked all the pieces together.

           “When she comes to me for aid, I will do what I can,” Persephone had told Euna. Had Joey visited Persephone after death? Her godly sister lived in the Underworld during this time of year, right?

           Euna ran forward into camp, past Phobetor. She felt the caution tape snap against her and flutter down in the freezing breeze. The world didn’t blink or anything to signify that she’d fallen into Phobetor’s dream world. Instead, she felt the temperature rise slightly.

           Camp was still too cold compared to its normal temperature. With each step, her vision diminished; the shadows inside the camp swallowed the floodlight’s illumination. The smashed strawberry field and gnarled trees became dark twists as she ran past. In the distance, she could hear the whisper of the camp’s river, but—other than that hushed din—there was nothing.

           No pegasus clopping. No campers laughing. Not even a monster snarling out of the trees. Euna couldn’t shake the feeling that this wasn’t their camp, but an eerie abandoned memory.

           Shouts trailed dimly behind her, and Euna was aware Alabaster and Pax had come after her. Their rushed footfalls meshed together with the sound of hers—

           Euna tripped on something.

           She stumbled and kept going without looking back. By now, she could see the soft flames of the central hearth, silhouetting the newer, small cabins—except Hecate’s, which cast its own green flicker. The central fire’s amber light glowed off the larger monoliths, making Zeus and Hera’s marbled columns look like those of mausoleums.

           The bodies of campers were scattered all over the camp’s center. Everyone was wearing PJs. Phobetor must have lurked into camp at night, just early enough for someone to sound the alarm. Then everyone fell among the sleep.

           “Just asleep,” she caught Alabaster’s hiss. He and Pax were almost directly behind her.

           A few campers looked like they might be stirring, but she didn’t have time to check.

           She instinctively slowed down when she saw the light from Cabin Two’s ajar door. There was another fire inside. A giant marble statue sat on a throne in the far end of the cabin. More like a temple than a cabin.

           When Euna got to the doorway, she paused.

           There were two figures inside. They were so faint, like holograms in mist, she thought they were tricks of the light.

           One was a Caucasian, pale haired boy with a giant crack in his skull and blood staining his unsteady visage.

           The other was her sister.

           What was left of her sister.

           Joey’s black and pink bob had been singed. From what Euna could see of the shade, her sister’s pale skin was charred black. Euna wasn’t even sure how she knew it was her sister, but—

           “—whatever, Will. Like I’m going to sit around waiting for a goddess. I’ve got better things to be doing, you know.”

           That was definitely her sister.

           Will sighed. “I guess we could be trying to scare the campers awake outside.”

           Joey huffed—a motion that would have normally puffed her hair out of her eyes if her ghostly hair hadn’t been so crisped. “I’m still creeped out that Al and Clubber—”

           “Kléber.”

           “—said most of those bad guy spirits were funneling out here. You don’t… you don’t think this is what Persephone was talking about, right? The whole strife following this thing?” Joey gestured with a small box in her hand.

           Will shook his head, considering Hera’s statue. “No, I don’t think us coming here caused any of this… I just wish the gods gave us better instructions. I don’t even know where to look for Nico or Melinoe—”

           “Joey?! Will!”

           Pax shattered the hushed conversation.

           Until that moment, Euna could pretend this was all a dream Phobetor had rigged.

           When Joey jumped, and turned to them, Euna felt some part of her give.

           Joey’s face was almost completely destroyed. Her jaw bone was cleanly exposed. There weren’t any eyes in her sockets.

           “Pax?!” the ghost squeaked in indignation. “You’re not supposed to be here! Augh—I haven’t touched up my make up since before hearing Mr. Charon’s horrible taste in Christmas muzak.”

           Euna could hear Pax’s voice quiver with sobs. “It’s okay, I’m sure you would still look like you’ve been through Hades and back.”

           “You know you can alter your appearance from that of a corpse,” Alabaster said calmly.

           Joey turned on Will and Euna got the feeling her sister was glaring. “Did you know we could do that? Why didn’t you tell me?!”

           “It was in the pamphlet I gave you,” Will said. As he said it, the blood receded from his face, and the crack in his skull vanished.  “I didn’t find it necessary when it was just us.”

           Joey huffed again. Then her burnt out face turned towards Euna. “Stupid pamphlet,” Joey grumbled. She fumbled something out of… her pocket?

           After a second of scanning the pamphlet, Joey’s skin reappeared in its pale glow. Her black bob with the pink streak fluffed back out—still looking disheveled, but there. Her face reconstructed, down to the mascara tear-streaks on her cheeks. Euna forgot that Joey would still be in their dark clothing from when Miranda had ordered a stealth hit on the Hermes cabin. That had been so long ago. Joey had tied her black shirt to the side to expose her midrift.

           Then Euna’s fourteen-year-old sister was before her, hands on her hips, giving Euna a skeptical scowl. “I’m sure you’ve been just as lazy as ever since I’ve been gone.” Joey rolled her eyes. Although her words sounded scathing, Euna could see the red rim around Joey’s dark gaze and the way she bit her lower lip to keep from sobbing.

           Euna choked back some tears. The world felt like it was dissolving. Her sister was here.

           She tried to think of something—anything—to say. Finally, she settled on, “Joey, I told you not to talk back to people like that—“

           Joey folded her arms. “Santiago pulled a thing of thorns through Pax’s tongue—”

           “I have a cool tongue ring because of it—”

           “—I couldn’t just sit around like the rest of you—”

           Euna thought about how her body wouldn’t react that day—how she couldn’t think after taking Hemera’s god droplets until she heard Joey’s death scream. But her words were now coming out of reflex, not thought. “But you’re always getting us in trouble because of that stupid mouth of yours! And I’m your older sister—I’m—I’m supposed—I’m supposed to protect you—”

           “’Because I’m the oldest,’” Joey mimicked with the deadest expression she could. The tears lingering on the edge of her eyes disappeared. Although she was shouting, and trying to look angry, Euna could see a smile tugging at the corner of Joey’s lips. “Just like how you’re supposed to get all the highest scores and kick the most butt at the dojo?”

           Euna felt herself smile. If she wasn’t certain her hand would go through Joey, she probably would have slapped her sister.

           Will glanced over to Pax and Alabaster in confusion.

           “As far as I can tell, the species of Song children express affection through acts of anger,” Pax explained.

           Joey snorted, gesturing at Alabaster. “Who is this guy with you? And why do you have that sword, Euna? And Pax—EW! Is that a HEAD attached to your belt?! Is it HUMMING?!”

           From behind her, Euna could hear Jack’s screeching chuckle as he said, “A spitfire. I like your personality, kid.”

           “Oh, that is disgusting,” Joey complained.

           Will’s face fell. “Is that the psychopath’s head?! Holy Apollo—did the gods give him Orpheus’s curse?”

           “QUIET!” someone thundered.

           The room shook.

           The voice seemed to resonate from the walls themselves. The fire pit in the center dimmed.

           The massive statue in the back of the room leaned forward from its throne. Those cold, white eyes emitted contempt. Euna remembered how colorful this goddess looked when she first saw her: the glisten of peacock feathers, the vibrancy of her cloak, the gold of her hair ribbons. But here, she looked cold.

           “How dare you use my sacred cabin as a place for revelry and ruckus!”

           “Hera,” Will said in awe, dropping to one knee. He shot the rest of them a look. Euna didn’t really feel like kneeling. The effort to get back up would be annoying, but she figured the consequences for not doing so would require further effort.

           Something scraped behind her.

           Euna glanced back in enough time to see someone dart out of the cabin. Alabaster and Pax weren’t anywhere to be seen.

           “Ah, the girl who thought she could handle the same trials and tribulations of Psyche and Hercules for the hand of a god. Have you returned to finish your quest? The Underworld appears to have treated you well,” Hera sneered.

           When Euna turned around, Joey still looked stunned. She shook her head, cleared her throat, then made a face. “Wait—augh—was that really why I got that quest? For Apollo? Gross.”

           “Hey,” Will protested, “Still my dad.”

           Joey sighed. “At least I got a quest out of it. One ahead of Miranda Gardener and my sister.” She stepped—really hovered—forward. She paused, glanced back over to Euna, and gave her a warm smile, like she had when they were little and Joey won her first dojo competition. She turned back around to set the rosewood container at the feet of Hera’s statue. “Here’s Persephone’s box with the ‘secrets to a happy marriage’ or whatever.”

           Despite everything, an expansion of happiness warmed Euna’s chest. Maybe Euna would have to visit home after this. Then she could tell her dad that Joey had done the Song family proud. Maybe Euna could get Pax to make a trophy that said Heroes First Solo Mission.

           Hera glowered. “You no longer want Apollo’s hand in marriage? Fickle girl. Marriage takes dedication and work.”

           “Yea, we have this wonderful invention called dating to figure that out if we wanna marry someone, now.” Joey waved her hand and Will looked like he might pass out from her flippant reaction. Euna felt it justified. Apollo was way too old for her sister. “Apollo made me realize I should prioritize good looks and dancing below making me laugh and caring when I get shoved into a sacrificial fire pit. If I would want anything for what I did, it wouldn’t involve him.”

           “Want?” Hera sounded livid. The statue gripped its armrest. “You heroes, always seeking rewards for the tribulations you bring upon yourselves.”

           Joey raised her chin. “No—I mean—yea, I’d like to not look like a corpse as a reward. But… no…”

           Joey stared off to the side for a moment, her right hand tightening into a fist. Euna wasn’t used to seeing Joey hesitate. That was something Euna thought was pretty awesome and annoying about her sister: her resolve. Joey knew what she wanted and didn’t hesitate to go after it.

           This was new and—for the first time—Euna wondered what Joey had gone through since she died. What could make her sound so uncertain?

           “I… I want a chance to be important in the scheme of things,” Joey said, her voice shaking. “I don’t want to fade away or be forgotten or forget. Hera,” Joey made eye contact with the goddess again. Er—stone to eye contact. Could Hera see through this rock? “I… I would like to complete another trial. I would like to do another tribulation. Let me do a quest for you.”

           “Also,” Will piped up. “If you could warn the other gods of what’s happening in Camp Half-Blood—”

           Hera’s face twisted towards Will. “This camp wouldn’t exist if the gods would honor their marriages,” she snarled. “Why should I help the children of whores?”

           “Irony alert! Because none of our parents had to wreck a marriage to have us!” a voice came from outside. “My mom may be a horrible whatever, but she’s not a whore, you b—”

           “Ajax, shut up,” another whispered.

           Hera snorted. Her face turned, like she was surveying the occupants of the room. Then, the statue leaned over to pluck Persephone’s box off the floor. The room shook with the movement and the grinding of rocks reverberated off the walls.

           “Um—Persephone said not to—” Joey started.

           “Heroes don’t usually volunteer themselves to me, Joey Song, daughter of Demeter. I need to check that you completed the quest sufficiently before I can give you another.”

           Hera opened the box.

           Everything hushed. The light from the central fire dimmed further. All Euna could focus on—all any of them could focus on—was the small slip of paper Hera withdrew from the box.

           When she shut the lid and set the box on the ground, the universe seemed to sigh in relief.

           Except Joey. Joey swallowed audibly.

           Hera went completely quiet. There was no expression on that stony face. After a few more moments, Euna thought Hera’s statue had gone back to doing what statues normally do: be a statue.

           Enough time had passed that Euna was about to ask Joey, Will, Alabaster, and Pax if they could consider their breakfast options. She was feeling some breakfast burritos.

           Then, Hera spoke, in a voice too sweet, “Joey Song… I can give you everything you want. You won’t look like a corpse anymore. And you won’t fade away or be forgotten.”

           “Wait—you’re—you’re okay with what Persephone gave you?” Joey asked. Although Joey was facing Hera, Euna could envision her sister’s gape. Joey scrambled to gain her composure while saying, with much more confidence, “You’ll give me another quest?”

           Joey twisted to give Euna another grin, as though to say two quests a head of you. Get on my level.

           “Oh no. A quest won’t be necessary. I know a fitting reward for conspiring with Persephone,” Hera said, and snapped her fingers.

           Nothing seemed to change. Euna couldn’t understand what was wrong, though she knew something was. Her sister was still smiling at her. Hera’s statue resumed its original position of glowering down at them.

           Will stared at Joey in horror.

           Euna didn’t get why. Even if Hera hadn’t given Joey another quest, at least Joey had completed this one. They could go get breakfast, swap stories, and exchange their goodbyes. Joey could scold Euna for joining the huntresses of Artemis and for not trying to get in Calex’s pants. Joey could depart for the Elysian Fields with a proper party. That’s where ghosts like Joey would go now, right?

           Would it be rude to eat in front of ghosts? Could they get ghostly meals for Will and Joey in a mini celebration? Euna knew how terrible it was to watch others eat when you didn’t have anything.

           But Joey didn’t continue to gloat. Nor did she shout indignantly when Hera’s presence exited and they were left with this icy, silent room.

           She kept grinning at Euna with that same proud smile. Euna couldn’t see through Joey anymore. Her sister’s skin looked ashy. Euna hadn’t understood when a grey-white color spread from Joey’s foot, up through the rest of her. Not until Euna stepped forward and touched Joey’s cheek, now as cold as the walls of Hera’s cabin.

           Everything was so quiet. All this time, Euna had been hoping for silence. She’d wanted the plant and farmer prayers to quiet. She’d wanted to get her sister’s scream out of her head. She’d wanted everyone to stop asking her if she was okay.

           Now, all Euna could do was stare at her sister’s form—frozen in a life-size statue, matching the one of Hera behind her—wishing Joey would talk.

           Euna’s fist shook around Backbiter’s hilt. Her gaze drifted over to the rosewood box. The silence was filled when Backbiter reminded her, Even the gods fear nothingness. 

 Soundtrack time! Written to Arai Tasuku’s Aileen’ Unseen Things and Time Passing Bell.

Mel Beta-comment: “I NOW WANT EUNA TO GO AFTER HERA AND CHOP HER UP!”

Thank you for reading! Mel is ready to pass out Camp Othrys Part II: The Fillet of Hera shirts. Stay tuned for next week’s chapter: Ajax: We Could Have Had a Slide or a Fireman’s Pole to see who else joins in that shirt party.

Footnote:

[1] What Euna doesn’t realize: office parties inspire this type of anger in anyone. The traumatic past is unnecessary.

[the-cryptographer]

tagged by @mai-valentine

RULES: Always post the rules. Answer the questions asked, then write 11 new ones. Tag 11 people to answer your questions, as well as the person who tagged you.

1. Who is the first person you think about when you wakeup?

Do I think of anyone when I wake up? I think, ‘I have to feed the dogs!!�� and ‘Is my grandma okay?!‘ but that’s after checking emails. The way I check my emails and this site is actually kind of obsessive and kind of compulsive. I need to stop.

2. if you had unlimited amount of money, how would you decorate your room?

Sliding bookshelves. Wall to wall. With one of those sliding ladders too~

3. what is your definition of love?

It’s like, you care a lot about somebody? You’ll know it when you see it... maybe? Obviously I have ppl I love, but it means different things in different circumstances so it’s hard for me to define, lol. And there are borderline cases too. What is love? idk, but I do feel like people have to define it for themselves on a case-by-case circumstance. I also feel like it’s wrong to try and dictate what is or isn’t love for other people.

4. do you believe in soul mates

No. Like, actually I’m pretty strongly against the idea but I try to be lowkey about it, lol. Having had people die on me, and having seen people who are really in love go through horribly difficult circumstances that makes it hard for them to be around each other, and having seen people be really wholly in love with people they can’t stop hurting... no. I think there are lots of people that could be right for one another given hard work and cooperation and the right time and circumstances. And sometimes things don’t work out with someone, but that person was still there for you for a while when you needed them, and I don’t think them not being able to live up to some myth of a forever perfect person makes the time they were there worth any less.

5. do you believe in SOULS in general

Yes, I do. I don’t really have any logical backdrop for it. But I’ve had a couple funny personal experiences and believe nonetheless.

6. where do we go after we die?

Unknown ;)

7. if you discovered that when you die you simply cease to exist and nothing more or less, would you live your life any differently, would you continue to live at all?

Si. I would continue to live. Not any differently either. I do believe there is something eternal about the soul, but I’m not convinced 100%. and, tbh, transience is terribly underrated. Sometimes things are beautiful because they do not last. Anyhow, I try to live my life so that I can be proud of what I’ve done in the context of this world. Obvs I’m not proud of everything, and I struggle a lot and make mistakes, but I’m already just trying to do the best I can for this life and for no other reasons. I’ll worry about the next life if and when I get there.

8. you have 1 day left to live and the power to see one person before you die. who do you see

Like, do I only get to see one person before I die, or do I see everyone I’d usually see on my daily schedule? Am I gonna be reunited with people in death? This question is too hard. I’d want to see my mom, or grandpa, or best friend, or my old coach, depending on the circumstances.

9. your closest friend is dying but you can trade your life to save them. do you do it

I... don’t know. I’m scared of the answer, tbh. I might just go ahead with it bc the chance of the guilt inadvertently killing me if I don’t seems rather high.

10. a dog and a baby are crossing the street and abt to get hit by a car bbut u can only save one. what do u do

Realistically, I’d probably freeze under the pressure and melt into an anxiety puddle and both would die, lol.

I like dogs more than babies. I don’t really like children until they reach about 3 or 4 years of age. But I’d save the baby. I think human life and emotion take precedence over dogs. And I don’t want devastated parents grieving their baby. Like, having your dog die is also traumatic, but it’s something everyone has to deal with anyhow given short dog lifespans. Otoh, it’s realistic to at least hope that parents will never have to deal with burying their kids.

11. do you think people who dont take christmas lights down are annoying?

No. I find Christmas lights cheerful all year round. I mean, I take mine down. But seeing other people leave them up makes me smile :)

My 11 questions:

1. Favourite Pokemon?

2. Have you ever been on a boat?

3. Would you rather live on an island off the coast, or in the mountains?

4. Do you have an idea what your dream job would be?

5. How did you get into fandom life?

6. Favourite thing to eat for breakfast?

7. Do you have any pets?

8. Do you grow any plants? Got a potted cactus anywhere :p

9. Do you have a ship you’re really into at this moment and a specific scenario you’re considering for them? Share.

10 + 11. Choose two of Mai-Valentine’s questions and answer them. I like them but they are angsty. This way you can choose the difficulty and angst level on what you answer :)

Do I know 11 ppl *checks list* I GUESS I DO?!?! I’m actually going to tag more of you. Some of you I’ve talked to quite a bit, and others I haven’t really talked to at all. But we’re all mutuals and if you’re just shy it can be like a ~get to know you~ kind of thing if you’re into that bc I am curious and like hearing about ppl. (I also like hearing about non-mutuals, if you want to do it and tag me.) So... Sorry if this seems invasive or rude or strange. You only have to answer if you’d like to- Please don’t feel obligated on my behalf. @a-gay-elephant-called-jonathan @alectoperdita @aquaburst07 @baratheas @battymarionette @cherishtheadolesence @emblematik @improfem @kiwi-jien @ljmjn @napkintr @nenya85 @oneeyefish @silent-kea @rainstormcolors @trion-revolutionary

:’)

[mayacraftroom]

What we started a drunken night out.

I met Justin in Medellin in May 2007, while he was traveling around Colombia before moving to D.C to attend school. He visited Bogotá and the coffee country before arriving in Medellin, where he stayed at a hostel where one of my best friends, and occasional I, used to work. While I waited for my friend to finish her shift before going out, I saw him first and everything about him grabbed my attention. I remember asking my friend who he was but she was in a bad mood and wanted only to go out and dance the day off. I was glad when I saw him again at the bar I was dancing with friends. Yes, he was good looking and a good dancer but there was something else that made my eyes glued onto him. It was kind of embarrassing— it’s not the Latina seductive style to stare— but I couldn’t stop. Anyway, I’m not really a shy person so, in the end, it didn’t matter that much. Eventually, we found ourselves dancing with each other, pretended to talk and kissed. We run into each other again the next night and with a beer, in hand, we talked for hours about politics, the Colombian conflict, traveling, philosophy, you name it. That second night I discovered what was that thing that made me so curious about him. I guess that somehow I knew instinctively that I could talk about anything with him and he would never make me feel stupid, or that my opinion was not valid just for being different to his. When we talk he showed real interest in what I had to say, real curiosity for why I was saying it, and he was ok with me asking him scrutinizing questions about his ideas and words. We discovered too that the moments of silence were also comfortable. 

His time in Medellin was short, so we made sure to see each other as much as we could before his trip to the Caribbean coast. It was a perfect summer fling story: short, intense, and with a promise of him coming back to Medellín after the coast. I did not believe him but he proved me wrong. He came back and stayed for almost two months, where we shared stories and moments almost every day. We would never have imagined that what started as a drunken dancing night out would be only the first of so many more nights, dances, talks, and kisses. Even more unthinkable that years later we will take everyone by surprise, including ourselves, by getting married in front of family and friends at Peninsula Park the rainy morning of Saturday, September 5, 2009.   Once married, sometimes we would make jokes about how ridiculous everything in our story was. We were like a stupid cheesy romantic movie with crying goodbyes at airports; with “I would see you again” sounding more like questions than affirmations; with big romantic surprises;  with hours and hours on Skype and “let’s stay awake all night long;” with “I like someone else” and “I don’t want to talk to you again;” with “let’s do it! Let's stay together, let’s get married even if we are not sure how long this would last.” We were happily married for 7 years. And they were ups and downs, yes like in any other marriage, but they were so many more ups that I’m sure those 7 years would have been easily 70 in the blink of an eye if depression, a disease he struggled with his whole life, would not have taken physically from my side this month. I was so lucky to see him sleeping peacefully in the mornings before I left to work or seating across the table drinking the pot of coffee he just made —he always made the best coffee! Lucky to see him at night and have dinner together while we talked about our days listening to some music —there was always good music with him. To sit and watch something on the sofa while he rested his head on my lap and let me play with his nice, soft hair for hours in that cozy happy place we called home. I’m so lucky to have grown a little bit older, happier and wiser next to him. 

Justin was the best person I could have ever dream off to love and be loved by. He was kind, sweet, smart,  curious, brutally honest, sensitive, a great dancer and cook. He was the best kisser and so easy on the eyes. His laughter was genuine and contagious, his sarcasm and his jokes were always spot on — even if sometimes confusing to me. He challenged me every day to be a better person, to get out of my comfort zone and to live a life of purpose, to learn something new and believe in me. His compassion, passion for social justice and equality were inspiring. He could drive me crazy and so mad that I could walk up the walls, but he was always able to disarm my anger with that beautiful smile or an annoyingly well-crafted contra argument. He was a nerd and a goofball how loved to be outside and showed me the joy of biking. He was my friend, confident, main adviser and lover. With him and thanks to him, I learned what it was love and what it was to be loved by someone. He was the love of this life. I feel so happy and blessed that somehow we found each other and that I got to be next to him all this time. He was a truly great- magical soul.  

His life was not defined by his depression. His passing will not be determined by it either. I and his family don’t want to hide in the shadow and the stigma people have around those that commit suicide, or for those that like us survive someone that does it. Suicide is the number 10th cause of death in the nation*, with Oregon ranking at Number 10 too. More people die by suicide than by homicides in a year, an average of 117 people per day, almost 5 people every hour. More than ever before we understand that depression is a disease, one that can be fatal, from which Justin sought tirelessly, and had treatment for years. 

I have to admit that I didn’t know a lot about depression, besides my own experiences with it before a couple of years ago. I knew even less about suicide before a couple of days ago. But now, now I know and today I want to ask all of you, that tomorrow, next month or maybe in the next year or decade to take care of your mental health and support those that seek help. Support the work of organizations that work for it and don’t bring shame or try to rush the well-being of those that are brave enough to share their struggle with anxiety, depression, sadness or melancholia with you. I guarantee you that is not easy to reach out and talk about our most intimate struggle.

Justin, I will miss everything about you. I will miss you every day for the rest of my life. As the Pablo Neruda sonnet, that one we chose to tell each other you in Spanish, and I in English for our wedding; that one I needed to practice for days the pronunciation of one single word (straightforwardly) says, I still “love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way.”  Justin, you will be always with me because of all of those like you, the ones I love with body and soul, live in my heart forever, and my heart is yours since I saw you for the first time in Casa Kiwi that May night of 2007.

*Please consider donating to the Community Alliance of Tenants: JUSTIN BURI TENANT LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT FOUND and keep his work, passion, and legacy in social justice and tenants rights going. Thank you! *For more data and information on suicide visit https://afsp.org/about-suicide/suicide-statistics/

[girls-scenarios]

Bear With Me

Idol: LE (EXID)

Prompt: LE is the scariest girl in school, the only people she's close to have known her since they were children. That is until you find her holding an umbrella over a soaking wet cardboard box with a tiny puppy inside one-day after classes and start taking care of it together.

Writer: Admin Kiwi

A/N: Me&You is a bop y’all. I might be in love with all the members? In case you can’t tell, I meant to have this up forever ago but just got around to it. Also the title is a pun and I’m sorry. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy!

Warnings: Minor cursing because I’ve never met a high school student who didn’t curse at least a little bit.

♡ Tip Jar♡

“God, she’s so hot.” At your friend Bora’s words, you looked up from your book. The two of you were studying in the library for your upcoming literature exam, but she seemed distracted. Now, as you followed her gaze, you knew why.

“Who?”

“Hyojin! LE! She’s over there talking to Hani and she just looks so badass and hot and-.”

“Like she could totally beat you up,” you said, shaking your head and turning back to your book. “What is it with you and bad girls?”

“I just think they’re hot, let me live my life,” Bora said, sighing and playfully kicking you under the table. “I don’t see how you don’t find her attractive! She’s really hot even without her bad girl status! Just her face!”

“Just because she’s attractive doesn’t mean I have to be attracted to her.”

“So you admit she’d attractive?”

“I’m not blind, Bora,” you said, huffing a bit. “Can we please get back to studying now? I don’t want to get beat up for talking about her.”

“I doubt she’d actually beat you up.”

“She’s beat people up before.” You raised your eyebrows as you looked over the top of your book, knowing you were right. “Remember? She beat up that Jason guy.” It was a vivid memory in your mind of accidentally walking onto the scene because you usually walked around the back of the school to get home. You’d decided to take the long way home after that scene.

“Yeah but he deserved it, I heard that she beat him up because he was harassing Hani.”

“Still. She has the power to beat people up and I’d rather not be one of those people. Also we have to ace this exam if we don’t want our grades to slip.”

“Fine,” Bora said with a sigh, slumping back into her chair. “We’ll just study boring old Shakespeare instead.”

“Thank you.” Even though you had been the one to suggest studying, a little while later you couldn’t help looking back over at Hyojin’s table. She was sleeping now, her head pillowed in her arms, and you noticed the bandage on her arm. Shivering, you quickly looked away, not wanting to know. You’d seen Hyojin fight before and you never wanted to see it again, so you quickly buried yourself in your book, trying to get the scary memories out of your mind.

-

It was raining. With a sigh, you let your shoulders slump as you looked out the windows at the torrential rain that showed no sign of stopping. You’d forgotten to bring an umbrella, which now meant that you’d have to run home through the rain. Just the thought made you miserable as you followed your fellow students to the doors, watching as everyone else pulled out their umbrellas.

“Do you want me to walk you home?” Bora asked as she pulled out her umbrella, looking worried. “I don’t want you to get sick.”

“No, your house is in the opposite direction,” you said, giving her a grateful smile. “I don’t want to inconvenience you.”

“Seriously, I can walk you home, it’s no big deal.”

“I can call my parents and see if they can come get me,” you said, waving your hands. “I’ll be fine.”

“If you say so.” Your best friend didn’t seem like she believed you, but she left in the opposite direction anyway, waving goodbye, knowing that you were too stubborn to argue with. As you turned back towards the doors, you sighed once again. There was no way your parents would be able to get you, so you’d just have to make a run for it. Thankfully, your house was nearby, and you could stick near the overhanging roof of the school as you walked around back as to avoid getting too wet, plus there were plenty of trees and-.

There was a sound at the back of the school. Your mind went back to the conversation you’d been having earlier with Bora and your heart began to pound. No way, was there really a fight going on in the pouring rain? Half of you wanted to back out now, but you knew going to long way today wasn’t an option. You’d definitely get sick.

So mustering all of your courage, you took a deep breath and turned the corner.

There wasn’t a fight going on. Instead, you saw Hyojin squatting on the ground, holding her umbrella out in front of her. She was still mostly under the school’s roof, but her side was getting wet, and you couldn’t help staring with your mouth hanging open, wondering what in the world was going on. For a moment, you wondered if you could just sneak past without her knowing. But then, as soon as you took a step forward, she turned around and her eyes caught yours.

Immediately, your heartbeat spiked and you panicked a bit, wondering if you were going to get beat up for seeing this, but Hyojin stayed seated, raising her eyebrows.

“Is this your puppy?”

“Huh?” Were you dreaming? Did those words really just come out of Ahn Hyojin’s mouth? What was going on? “What puppy?”

“There’s a puppy here.” It was only then that you realized what she was holding her umbrella over. It was a soaked cardboard box that shook like something was moving around in it. Your curiosity got the best of your better judgement and you walked over, on the side with the overhang, to peer inside. Sure enough, there was a wet little puppy inside, wiggling around and shaking. There was a wet blanket in the box as well, but that was all. No note, no anything. Just a puppy in a box.

“It’s not mine,” you finally said, crouching down beside her. “Who would leave a puppy out in this kind of weather?”

“He’s been here since yesterday, actually. I just moved him over here today to try and get it out of the rain.”

Your eyebrows shot up and you turned to look at her, only to quickly look away, heart pounding. For a moment, you’d forgotten that this was Hyojin you were talking to. “U-um, how did you find him?”

“I heard him crying yesterday on my way to school and gave him some food and water. But then my parents said I couldn’t bring him home, and none of my friends can either. Then it started raining today.” She let out a sigh as she reached in to pet the furry dog. “I’m worried that he’s going to get sick and die with no one to take care of him. I don’t know any no-kill shelters either, and I don’t want to give him to the pound.”

You looked into the cardboard box at the puppy, and it blinked back at you, shivering ever so slightly. Its big, scared eyes made your heart hurt, and you reached in to pet it too. Your parents probably wouldn’t be too mad, right? “I think I might be able to keep it.”

“Really?” Hyojin’s face lit up, and you jumped a bit, taken aback.

“Yes?”

“That’s great! I can help you take care of him, so don’t worry about buying him anything.”

“You don’t have to do that,” you said, laughing nervously. Although the money would help, you didn’t know if you wanted to be indebted to her. Also, there was an idea in your head that the money might be dirty, and you didn’t want to deal with that either, just in case.

“I would feel guilty making you take a puppy and then doing nothing to help you. Plus, I’m a bit attached to him.” For the first time ever, you watched as she smiled, looking down at the puppy. “Puppies are expensive, at least let me help.” There was no way you could argue with someone as scary as Hyojin, even if she was smiling down at a puppy. You still remembered all too well seeing her beat up a guy.

“Um, you aren’t making me take him or anything....” You trailed off as she picked the puppy up out of the box and stood up, only to step back a bit when she sent you a smile.

“So, which way to your house?”

“Uh.”

“Hey, why are you wet? Did you not bring an umbrella or something?”

And that was how you ended up under the same umbrella as the infamous Hyojin, nickname LE, holding a soaking wet puppy as she walked you to your house and promised to help you parent him. As you walked, feeling a bit dizzy, you wondered how it had all come to this.

-

Taking care of a puppy was exhausting. You’d only had it for one night, and even after (reluctantly) going to the store with Hyojin to grab all the necessary supplies, you’d still been up all night trying to make sure the puppy didn’t accidentally kill itself or pee on the floor or overeat or eat something it wasn’t supposed to.

Now, you laid with your head pillowed on your desk, barely running on the three hours of sleep you’d gotten and staring at the text message on your phone.

LE: Yo, did you name him yet? I just realized that we forgot to name him.

Having Hyojin in your contacts was weird enough, but the fact that she was actually texting you was even weirder. And your tired brain wasn’t helping anything, stumbling over the contents of the text as you tried to remember. Unless you’d decided to name him “troublemaker” or “no” or “brat” you hadn’t named him yet.

(Y/N): No. Not yet. He kept me up all night though.

LE: Lol that’s how puppies are. Sorry for making you parent him alone. Want me to bring you an energy drink or something?

For a moment, that almost sounded nice. But then you remembered that this was Hyojin you were talking to, and your brain quickly backed out. There was no way you’d be able to survive her randomly coming up to you during school hours.

(Y/N): I was going to get coffee so I’m good. Thanks though.

LE: Sounds good. Meet after school in the same place?

You wanted to cry a little bit, but you sucked it up because raising a puppy was tiring and more expensive than you’d thought it would be and you kind of needed her help because you weren’t about to dump the little guy off at a shelter. With a sigh, you typed out your reply and closed your eyes, turning off your phone to let it lay beside you.

(Y/N): Yeah see you there.

Your little before-class nap was interrupted, though, when someone sat down loudly beside you, making you jump a bit and open your eyes. Bora grinned at you from her seat next to you, looking much too awake for your liking.

“Wake up, sleepyhead. Did you stay up all night watching anime or something?”

“No.” You rubbed your eyes and sat up, wishing you could just crawl under the desk and sleep. Half of you wanted to tell Bora the truth, but you knew she’d never shut up about it, so you bit your tongue. “I just couldn’t sleep.”

“Lies. You were watching anime all night, weren’t you.” Her eyes moved down to your phone. “Who were you texting earlier?”

“Uh. A friend.”

Bora raised her eyebrows. “A friend? If it was Soyou, please tell her I want my sweatshirt from the sleepover back.”

“No, no.” You waved your hand. “She’s, uh, from another school.”

Your friend stayed quiet for a moment before shrugging her shoulders, deciding it wasn’t worth prying into anymore. “That’s cool. Hey, did I leave my pencil case at your house? I can’t find it anywhere.” Relieved, you sat back into your chair and closed your eyes again, shaking your head. Maybe you could get a little bit of rest before the teacher came in.

“Nope. Not at my house.”

-

Somehow, Hyojin was half as scary when she was playing with a fluffy little puppy. You sat on your bed with hooded eyes, watching sleepily as a girl you’d never talked to before yesterday played with a fuzzy little puppy on your bedroom floor, cooing at it with a high-pitched voice you’d never heard her use before. It was weird, but you were too tired to give it much thought, eyes drifting closed as your mind went elsewhere.

“Oh yeah, we need to name him.” She looked up at you and you blinked, snapping out of whatever trance you’d been in.

“Right. Did you have anything in mind?”

“Not really,” she said, and you looked down at the puppy. He was a dark, furry little thing, and you assumed he had to be a poodle of some sort because of how curly his hair was. His eyes were big, although mostly hidden by the long hair on his head, and he bounced around when he was excited, ears flopping around and tongue hanging out. Although he was silly, he also reminded you a bit of a really furry bear somehow, and you leaned forward, studying him.

“How about Bear? Since he kind of looks like one.”

She leaned back, studying him. “You know what? I kind of see it.” The puppy jumped around, and she smiled. “I think he likes that name too. What do you say, Bear?” He ran around her in circles before tripping over his blanket and sprawling out on the floor, and both of you laughed. “I think it fits.”

“Bear it is, then.”

“We should get him one of those engraved dog tags.”

“They have those?”

“Yeah, they’re super cute! I’ll get him one.” She grinned as she spoke, scooping him up into her arms, and you wondered if this was really the same girl you’d seen beating up a kid at the back of the school. “He’ll look so handsome in it.”

“He’ll look even more handsome once he stops peeing on the floor,” you said, shaking your head and flopping back onto your bed. “I never want to clean up another pee spot ever again.”

“True. We’ll have to really focus on potty training him. You can do it, right Bear?” Bear jumped around once again, obviously not understanding a single word, but she cheered nonetheless, making you laugh.

“If he wasn’t so damn cute, I’d be more mad at him.”

“You can’t be mad at this face, (Y/N).” She held him up beside her own face, and he licked her, making you laugh again. It felt a little weird, still, to be talking to her like this. But it was also already comfortable. Something about Bear being there made it easier to chat with her without being scared, and you wondered what it was as you grinned and sat up to move to the floor beside her, taking him into your own arms to coo at him.

“You’re so, so right.”

-

“Listen, you aren’t getting enough sleep, so I’ll spend the night so we can take turns watching the puppy.” Hyojin was laying on the floor with Bear on her stomach, petting him slowly, and you turned to look at her from where you were sitting at your desk, raising your eyebrows. Sure, the two of you had gotten closer over the week the two of you had been raising him, but you weren’t sure if you were ready to spend the night in the same room with her.

“I think I’ll be okay, I’ve gotten the hang of things now.”

“You have terrible dark circles under your eyes,” she pointed out. “I told you I’d help you raise him and I intend to do just that.” Smiling, she looked down at the puppy. “It’s not fair that you’re the only one losing sleep when I asked you to take him in.”

“Again, it was my choice. It’s not like you forced me to do anything.”

“Still. Let me help you.” If there was anything you’d learned while getting closer to Hyojin, it was that she was too stubborn to argue with when it came to these things. So you sighed and gave up, turning back to your homework.

“Well, if you insist. I’m sure my parents wont mind.” You almost wished they were strict enough to tell you no, but you knew they’d be excited that someone was spending the night, especially since you usually went to your friend’s houses these days instead of the other way around. “Do you want to run home and get some clothes and things?”

“Yeah, I don’t live far. Want to come with me? My little brother wants to see the puppy anyway.” She sat up, Bear wiggling around in her arms, and you looked over your half-finished homework, debating with yourself before giving in and standing up.

“Sure, why not? Let’s get Bear’s leash.”

Bear was all too excited to be going somewhere. He always loved walks, tugging at the leash to try and go faster, but today he seemed especially excited, bouncing around as he walked and making the two of you laugh.’

“Why are you so excited, Bear? Do you know where we’re going?”

“I think he’s just excited to be outside,” you said with a laugh. “He’s a mess.”

“It be like that sometimes,” Hyojin said, agreeing with you, and you laughed again, this time with a tinge of surprise because you’d never thought that she was the joking type.

“True.”

Hyojin’s house really wasn’t far, and as the two of you approached the door, you found yourself getting nervous again. What would her family be like? What would her room be like? Were you the only person outside of her friend group to ever step foot inside her house? What did this mean?

As questions whirled around inside your head, Hyojin threw open the door and held the excited Bear back from walking inside. “Yo, brother! Get down here, you have to meet him outside because he’s going to pee everywhere!” Her words made you laugh, knocking you out of your worried state because that was really so true. Feeling a little bit less anxious now, you stepped up behind her and greeted her younger brother, watching with a grin as Bear hopped around before doing exactly what Hyojin said he would.

By the time you finally reached her room, a lot of your anxiousness had worn off and you were able to look around and take everything in. You’d expected Hyojin’s room to be dark and grungy, maybe, but it wasn’t. She had some rap posters up on the wall and a bookshelf full of records and albums, but for the most part, it just looked like a hipster room full of folded blankets, photos of her and her friends on the walls, and cat pillows. It was less like the Hyojin you saw at school and more like the Hyojin you saw with Bear, and it made you wonder if she was just acting tough at school.

“Alright, I’m ready. Let’s head back.” Her voice snapped you out of your thoughts and you nodded, face flushing a bit as you remembered exactly what the two of you were heading back for. Hyojin was going to be spending the night. In your room.

“Let’s go,” you said, hoping your voice didn’t shake as you scooped your puppy up into your arms and took a deep breath. You could do this.

-

Finally, you couldn’t hold back anymore. You had to tell someone. So you did.

“What? You and Hyojin are raising a puppy together?”

“And she spends the night at your house?”

“Guys, shhhh, I don’t want the whole school to know!” You brought a finger up to your mouth, shushing Bora and Soyou, who sat in front of you with wide eyes and open mouths.

“Still, that’s incredible,” Bora hissed, leaning forward. “Are you guys, like, an item or something?”

“No! No, we’re just. Friends raising a puppy, I guess.”

“That’s not weird at all,” Soyou commented, clasping her hands together. “I need all the deets.”

“I’ve given you all the details. I found her holding her umbrella over a puppy and offered to take him in since she couldn’t, and she insisted we raise him together. So that’s what we’re doing.”

“Is she scary even with the puppy?” Bora looked all too excited by the idea, and you wrinkled your nose, kicking at her under the table.

“No! Actually, she acts a lot different when she’s with me and the puppy. She loves him a lot, she coos at him like a baby and cuddles him and everything. Her bedroom has cat pillows and pink blankets in it.”

“You’ve been in her bedroom?” Bora’s cheeks colored and Soyou sent her a look.

“Is that the only thing you got out of that?”

“No, I just got excited. I can’t imagine her like that, though.”

“I thought it was weird too. But now I’ve just gotten used to it. I think she’s just a softy on the inside with RBF or something.”

“RBF?”

“Resting Bitch Face, dumbass,” Soyou said, and Bora kicked her, whining and making you shush both of them again.

“Guys!”

“Sorry, sorry. Continue.”

“Like I was saying.” You gave both of them a pointed look. “I think she’s actually a nice person. A bad person wouldn’t pay for all the supplies to raise a puppy, you know?”

“True. Is she even more attractive when she’s nice?”

“Bora. Stop being thirsty,” you said, face flushing at the thought. Hyojin was attractive when she played with the puppy, but you weren’t going to admit that.

“It’s cool that you guys are raising a puppy, though,” Soyou said with a sigh, leaning her head on her hand. “I want to raise a puppy with a hot girl.”

“Me too. Sign me up for that!”

Shaking your head, you buried your face in your hands. Why were your friends like this?

-

Now that dating had been brought up to you, you couldn’t look at Hyojin in the same way. Somehow, she looked even more attractive now, and you found yourself getting nervous around her for an entirely different reason. Especially because your friendship was now extending to school too.

The class watched with wide eyes as Hyojin strode up to you, hands in her leather jacket, only to pull out her phone and show you the adorable photos she got of Bear with a hat on. The two of you shared energy drinks after particularly hard nights, and one day, you accidentally used her shampoo in the shower and came to school smelling like her. Even her friends had started smiling at the two of you like that and it felt like you were going to go crazy.

You felt like you were hiding it well enough from Hyojin. At least, you hoped she didn’t notice the way you sometimes avoided her eyes or tried to sit away from her, or the way your face heated up when she got too close or said something cute.

But apparently you weren’t hiding it well enough, because one day in your bedroom, when Hyojin went to sit beside you and you flinched, she suddenly stilled, that scary resting face of hers replacing her smile. For a moment, you wondered if she’d noticed your feelings, before she sighed and ran her fingers through her hair, shaking her head.

“Hey, did I do something to make you afraid of me?”

Your eyes widened and your grip on Bear went lax, allowing him to jump out of your arms and run around on the bed. “Uh, what?”

“I’ve noticed that you’ve been avoiding me and trying not to look at me and I wondered if I’d done something wrong.” She looked genuinely worried, eyebrows furrowed together, and you swallowed, heart beating out of your chest. “I’m sorry if my reputation might sully yours, so if you want me to stop talking to you at school or whatever just-.”

“No!” Your sudden outburst startled her, and she jumped, looking at you with wide eyes. Flustered, you searched for the words to say. “I-that’s not it! It’s nothing that you did. I like talking to you and raising Bear with you and I’m not scared of you. At least, not anymore, since I know the real you.” As you spoke, Hyojin’s face began to color, making you flush in return. “I-I just started to notice a lot of things about my own feelings and stuff and it was making me nervous and I just-.”

“(Y/N), I like you.” This time, it was you taken aback by her words, and for a moment, you felt like you might melt. Were you dreaming? Was this really happening? “Um, sorry if that wasn’t what you were getting at.”

“It was,” you breathed, knowing that your face was a deep color of red by now. “I like you too, Hyojin.”

A smile broke out on her face and she pressed a hand to her chest, letting out a sigh of relief and leaning back against your bed frame. “Oh my god, good. I was so scared that I’d done something bad.”

You began to smile too, letting out a giddy laugh. “Sorry that I scared you.”

“Nah, you don’t have to apologize.” She sat back up, quickly picking up Bear as he perched at the end of the bed, ready to jump off. “Does this mean we’re dating now, or?”

“I mean, if you want to.”

“I want to.”

With a grin, your heart pounding in your chest, you reached out to take one of her hands. “Then let’s date.” Had someone told you a month ago that you’d end up dating Hyojin, you would have laughed in their face. But now, those words made you happier than you could have ever imagined they would, and as she squeezed your hand and Bear laid down, stretching himself between both of your laps with his paws on your thighs, you knew you wouldn’t want this any other way.

[girls-scenarios]

Kiss, Kiss, Fall In Love

Idol: Dahyun (Twice)

Summary: Would you write an imagine where the reader and Dahyun are in a drama together and they have to kiss?

Writer: Admin Kiwi

A/N: This is my first time writing on this blog, so I apologize if it’s different than what you might have been expecting from Admin Kitty.

“Unnie. Unnie, help me, I’m going to die.” Without waiting for a response, Dahyun fell face-first into Nayeon’s bed, causing the older girl to let out a surprised yell and bolt up into a sitting position. Dahyun whimpered, but the sheets muffled her voice.

“Um, Dahyun. Earth to Dahyun. What’s going on?” Again, Dahyun whined into the sheets, causing Nayeon to huff and pull her feet out from where they had been trapped under Dahyun’s body. “I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.” Slowly, Dahyun’s hand came up, holding up a sheet of papers stapled together to look more organized. She didn’t bother to life her head up from where it was buried in Nayeon’s bed. 

Giving the younger girl a weird look, Nayeon reached over and plucked the papers out of Dahyun’s hand. As Dahyun let her arm flop back down, Nayeon looked silently over the papers, squinting her eyes in the dim light coming in through the window to try to see what had made Dahyun so upset. It wasn’t unti she reached the fourth page that she found it, and promptly burst into laughter.

“Dahyun, you’re going to die.” Dahyun let out a pathetic sound and rolled over a bit, glaring at Nayeon, who was still laughing.

“Unnie,” she whined. “You’re supposed to be helping me, not laughing at me.” Nayeon threw her head back in laughter, but it collided with the wall behind her, making a loud noise and causing Dahyun to suddenly burst into laughter. “Karma, Unnie.” Nayeon hissed and threw the papers back at the younger girl as the door slid open and Jungyeon and Jihyo poked their heads inside.

“We heard a thud, what’s going on in here?” Jihyo asked, walking into the room and letting the light from the hallway fall inside. Dahyun sat up to respond, but Nayeon beat her to it, bringing her hand up to rub at her head as she spoke.

“Dahyun has to kiss (Y/N)!” Dahyun could feel her face heating up, so she fell back onto the bed, covering her face with the sheets again. Jungyeon rushed past Jihyo to the Nayeon, who had just grabbed the sheets of paper back from Dahyun. “See? See? There’s a kissing scene!” Nayeon turned to the page and shoved it at Jungyeon, who started laughing as soon as she had read the beginning of the scene.

“Oh my god, Dahyun, you’re going to die. Do you want us to start planning your funeral?” Jihyo sat beside Dahyun on the bed and patted her hair sympathetically. 

“I told you taking on a drama with (Y/N) might be a bad idea, considering your crush on them.” Dahyun turned her head to pout up at Jihyo, pointedly trying to ignore Nayeon and Jungyeon in the background laughing as they looked over the scene.

“I know. I just wanted to get closer to them, I didn’t realize that there would be a kiss scene! We’re not even main characters, we’re the friends of the main characters. There was no warning.” Jihyo nodded slowly.

“Considering how long it usually takes for just the main characters to hold hands... I’d say you’re just super unlucky.” Dahyun whimpered and shoved her face back into the bed.

“Thanks a lot.” Her words were again muffled by the sheets, and Jungyeon leaned over Jihyo to pat Dahyun’s back a few times.

“Look at our baby. Growing up so fast.” Nayeon leaned over as well, waving the papers.

“If you want, we can give you kissing tips. Then you can really impress them.” For a second, Dahyun actually thought about taking her up on the offer, but then promptly blushed even harder and shook her head, letting out a little embarrassed groan.

“Oh look what you’ve done, you’ve broken her,” accused Jungyeon, looking at Nayeon. Nayeon put on her best innocent face, raising her eyebrows.

“All I did was offer to teach her how to be good at something. She came to me for help, I can give her help in that department.” Jungyeon giggled.

“I think your kissing skills are a little lacking, honestly.” There was a moment of silence, of Nayeon looking incredulously at Jungyeon, before Nayeon tackled Jungyeon and they rolled off the bed and landed on the floor with a thud, yelling. Jihyo sighed and looked back down at Dahyun, who had lifted her head a bit just in time to see them fall off the bed.

“Just breathe, Dahyun, you can do this. Don’t let your emotions take control. Breathe, get completely into character, and... chew some gum beforehand or something.” Dahyun laughed a bit, ignoring the chaos that was happening on the floor. Yeah, she could do this. Maybe.

She couldn’t do this. She was going to trip on her own feet or kiss you weird or get sick or faint... The directer called for a break, for them to get their makeup touched up and move on to the next scene, and Dahyun collapsed into her makeup chair, closing her eyes and breathing in deeply as the makeup ladies busied themselves with her face and hair. She remembered Jihyo telling her to breathe and get into character. She could do that. She wasn’t Dahyun, she was cute Namjoo who liked books and wore glasses and supported her best friend Lena in getting with the main character Woobin. She was cute Namjoo who liked dogs and danced silly and-

Her eyes flew open. “Gum. Does anyone have gum? Or a mint?” One of the makeup ladies looked at her weird, but went and grabbed a small metal tin with mints in it anyway. Thanking her profusely, Dahyun opened the container and popped two of the mints in her mouth before leaning back into the chair. She probably looked silly, making such a fuss. You had probably done a ton of kissing scenes, this would be nothing big to you. She was about to start scolding herself when the directer called for everyone to get back into their positions. With another deep breath, she finished her mints and stood up, smiling and the retreating staff.

“Hey, Dahyun!” She turned quickly at the sound of your voice behind her. You grinned and held up your hand. “Let’s do well in this next scene, yeah?” She giggled, feeling some of the tension in her stomach loosen as she gave you a high-five.

“Of course!” The directer called again, getting impatient, so she sheepishly smiled and ducked away to her side of the room, where she would wait until it was her turn to come into the room. Bouncing her leg nervously, she watched as the other actors filed into their spaces in the room and the cameras began to roll. Time seemed to drag on as the main character explained why he was falling for the other main character Lena and why he was going to go meet her instead of hang out with his close friend. Right before he walked out the door, he turned around and shook his head.

“You don’t understand what it’s like to kiss someone, you’ve never been kissed before.” With a shake of his head, he walked out of the room, leaving your character alone in the room. Dahyun stepped aside to let him pass her and got into position behind the now closed door. With a sigh, you sank into the chair and rested your chin in your hand.

“What’s so good about kissing anyway?” You muttered, grabbing the remote to turn on the prop tv. Dahyun swallowed and stepped up to the door, knocking twice. The butterflies in her stomach began to dance as you called for her to come in. Following the script, she opened the door slightly and poked her head inside, looking back and forth between you and the tv.

“Oh? Where’s Woobin? I thought tonight was game night?” You rolled your eyes as she stepped through the door and carefully closed it behind her. 

“He ditched us for Lena. Something about her lips and wanting to kiss them.” Dahyun pouted, staying in character as she walked over to the couch and flopped down beside you, fake glasses falling down her nose a bit.

“How rude. I mean, they’re cute and all, but tonight is game night!” You didn’t respond, looking at her thoughtfully. Confused, she looked back. “What?”

“Can I test something?” Dahyun’s heart sped up and the butterflies started doing back flips. This was it, it was happening.

“Sure?” She was proud of herself for keeping her voice stable and face in a confused expression, although she could feel her cheeks getting pink. Maybe she was imagining it, but your cheeks looked a bit pink as well. You suddenly leaned forward and pressed your lips to hers, and she balled her hands into fists to keep them by her side, widening her eyes in fake surprise, even though the press of lips was gentle because the angle of the camera would hide that it wasn’t a full kiss. She gasped as you broke away from her, face fully red and hand coming up to cover her lips. You brought your hand up to your lips as well, looking down at the couch before standing up.

“I guess there is something to kissing after all...” You said quietly, as the script called for, before rushing out of the room. The directer yelled for a cut and grinned. 

“That’s it! That’s the emotion I was wanting! Perfect!” He called. Dahyun resisted the urge to fall onto the couch and scream, standing slowly and walking over to her makeup chair. She knew her cheeks were still warm, but hoped the makeup was thick enough that it wasn’t obvious. Just as she sat down, you came up, on your way to your own chair, but stopped suddenly. The butterflies in her stomach fluttered to remind her they were still there and she held her breath as you looked at her. Had she messed up somehow? What if there had been spit on her lips, or the mints hadn’t worked, or-

“Hey, um. Do you want to get coffee later? After the shoot? My treat.” Her mouth dropped open, and then she couldn’t stop the smile that spread across her face.

“Yeah, that would be cool.” Apparently her kissing hadn’t been that bad. She couldn’t wait to tell the other girls back at the dorm. Maybe Nayeon and Jungyeon needed kissing lessons from her.