#if camila really is leaving i’ll probably bounce too

[rosehathawhey]

Jake listening to all of Julie’s shit talking about Gabi is making me so angry. In a town full of people riding around on high horses, Julie’s is definitely the highest.

I saw spoilers that Jake isn’t Stefan and fine whatever that’s a mistake but it is what it is. But if Jake doesn’t get his shit together and realize Gabi is the baddest bitch in Salem and he would be blessed to have her love I’m gonna riot.

[jawnjendes]

bonus: prettiest girl at the party | shawn mendes

university au, shawn x goth oc

AN: this aint the sequel yet, its just a little extra bit, a flashback if you will. and it includes a NAME REVEAL. oh and the end kind of hints to whats gonna be going on in “season 2″ of this fic :)

**let me know if u wanna be added to the taglist

masterlist

“Those shoes remind me of the time we first met,” Shawn said, nodding down to the huge black platforms on my feet.

I was at least five inches taller in these fashionable death traps. My feet were aching and blistering whether I was sitting or standing because of the plastic material, but it was all for the look. Shawn may have been taller than me despite this, but I felt more powerful and confident. He had his eyes on me from the moment he saw me tonight, so damaging my feet may have been worth it. However, I was confused by his statement.

“I’m pretty sure I didn’t wear these bricks to the coffee shop,” I replied.

“No, not that time,” he told me. “It was a little bit before that.”

“What?”

~

It’s one thing to be caught in the middle of a walk of shame the morning after said shameful events. It was something else to be caught in this walk only fifteen minutes after the fact. Shawn had clearly lost track of time, checking his watch before fixing the collar of his shirt and ruffling his hair back into place. The elevator doors opened to the dorm lobby, and Brian was standing on the other side, probably waiting to go up.

At least it was Brian. He always knew that Shawn was either in class, at work, in the studio, or "visiting" a friend. He didn’t judge, unlike other friends. Camila always asked Shawn when he was going to tie himself down to a proper relationship. She knew what he really wanted deep down.

Shawn had bigger things to worry about at the moment.

“Just tell me it wasn’t who we’re about to go visit right now,” Brian said, stepping into the elevator next to his friend.

“Who? Camila?” Shawn asked, resisting the urge to laugh out loud. “No way!”

“We’re not going to Camila’s,” Brian reminded him. “We’re going to her friend’s dorm. She’s got a Switch and booze.”

The doors opened to the second floor of the building. Brian led the way to the right room, and just as the approached the door to B24, Camila turned the corner from the end of the corridor.

She smiled wide and greeted the two boys. “Hey! We’re right on time!” She was about to knock on the door, but Brian quickly grabbed her wrist to stop her.

“What’s your friend’s name again?”

“Her name is Stella Martinez. And don’t grab me,” Camila replied pointedly as she harshly pulled her arm away. Her brown eyes trailed over to Shawn. “You might wanna fix your shirt. The buttons are mixed up. And I hope that’s lipstick on your neck.”

Shawn’s cheeks flushed as his hand went up to the crook of his neck. Just as Camila had said, there was something there. He felt the slimey, glossy substance under his fingers and then rubbed it away. Looking down at his white shirt, he found that two of the buttons in the middle had gone missing. He totally did not know how that happened.

Finally, Camila knocked on the door, and answered the famous Stella Martinez. Although, she answered the door a little too fast, like she had been waiting on the other side. "Hi guys! I'm so glad you guys made it!" She hugged all three of them, despite never having met Brian and Shawn before.

Actually, Shawn knew her… barely. He met Stella through Camila only once, when she had crashed their chorus class and pretended to sing along with everyone else. All he remembered was that she could carry a tune.

The dorm looked and felt like an apartment, it was very big for only one person. Shawn himself didn’t live on campus, but he knew not all of the dorms were as spacious as this one. It was almost as big as his apartment, plenty of light would come in if it wasn’t for the thick curtains on the windows.

Stella happily invited Shawn, Brian, and Camila onto the couch and then she dashed into the kitchen, her light brown hair bouncing behind her.

“Is your place this cool?” Brian asked Camila. So he had been thinking about it too.

“Not even. I’m in the other college,” she said. “First years get jack shit. Stella's a second year with a fuck ton of credits, so she got priority in choosing classes and living space."

Stella returned from the kitchen holding four open Corona bottles. She placed them all on the coffee table and the other three reached for their own bottles. Stella sat down on the floor facing them.

“Oh, here,” Shawn said, immediately standing up and gesturing to his seat.

Normally, there was a minor “no, you’re the guest” debate, but Stella wasn’t one for that. She happily sat next to Camila, so Shawn sat on the floor leaning against the arm of the couch. He noticed a random object on the table, a black and teal something… like a Swiss army knife. Interesting choice for a centerpiece.

“So,” Brian spoke up after a while, “where’s the Switch?”

“Oh yeah!” Stella exclaimed, jumping to her feet. “I’ll be right back!”

The way she moved and carried herself was almost spastic. Stella was clearly very excited to have guests over, and what she lacked in height was made up for in her energy. Shawn had a feeling he would probably adore her by the end of the night.

He watched her go up to one of the bedroom doors, and that was when her energy faltered a little bit. She knocked almost timidly and then went inside the room.

“Does she have a roommate?” Shawn asked the other two. Surely he couldn’t have been the only one to notice the lack of other life in the vicinity.

“Yeah, she does,” Camila replied. “I don’t know her, though. She doesn’t leave her room that much, from what Stella tells me.”

Her words were immediately contradicted as a new girl came out of the room. She was holding a rectangular dock, 2 cords, and a grey Nintendo Switch. Stella followed after her, and the two separate energies became very apparent in the room, and it wasn’t just from their appearances.

Stella had a bounce in her step and a ghost of a smile permanently on her face. She was dressed for guests, in her red blouse and ripped blue jeans. Her hair was in a neat braid, and her perfume was strong, but also inviting. She was very easy to approach and get along with. You could tell you would end up being friends with her in just a few short minutes.

The roommate radiated something else. Not only was she in a torn and tattered Rise Against t-shirt and tiny black shorts, she also had the most neutral, borderline scowl on her face. She greeted the three guests on the couch with a nod of her head when Stella introduced them. She didn’t say anything more as she leaned down to plug the dock into the back of the TV, her long, dark hair covering her face. She looked like someone you did not want to cross. She could probably kill you with one glare, and it wasn’t just from the amount of eyeliner she had on.

Stella and her roommate were obviously very different. So guess which of the two girls Shawn felt inexplicable attraction to.

It was probably the legs. While this mysterious roommate wasn't the tallest person in the room (taller than Stella, at least), she had some killer legs coming out of those tight little shorts. Her olive skin almost glowed in that area. At least something on this girl was glowing. Shawn tore his eyes away from her body as she addressed the group.

“I’ve got three controllers total,” she said, her voice as neutral as her face was, “the joycons for the Switch.” She held up two small grey controllers, and one black gamepad. “And I have one pro controller. If anything messes up, let me know.”

She placed the controllers on the coffee table and simply turned on her heel to leave.

“You don’t wanna join us?” Stella asked her.

Yes, please join us. You’re kinda creepy looking but I need to talk to you.

“I’m still unpacking,” the roommate called over her shoulder.

Shawn was puzzled at that answer. He shared a look with Camila and Brian, who were just as bemused.

“It’s October,” Brian pointed out.

The roommate stopped at her doorway and turned back to him. "And what about it?"

Again, if looks could kill. She was definitely someone you don’t wanna mess with.

Shawn was mildly tempted, though. He watched her go into the room and shut the door non-too-gently. If this was a full blown party, Shawn would have been able to work up the courage to sneakily follow her and hit her up. He could have disappeared with the prettiest girl at the party and his friends would be none the wiser. But this was a much smaller setting, and it would be rude for him to ditch his friends for a stranger. Not to mention, this girl's energy and general presence made Shawn just a little nervous.

Instead, he watched the other three play against each other at Mario Kart. Stella practically screamed every time she was hit with a shell, while Brian cursed every time he lost to Camila. Shawn played a couple of rounds (finishing last), but he mainly nursed his beer, eyes flickering between the TV and the roommate's bedroom door. He really shouldn't have been so quick to take interest another girl, given where he was not that long ago. Was he really that desperate? Was he more of a horndog than he thought?

Between races, the group would hear tearing noises and cardboard shuffling around from the room. There was also faint rock music playing as well, but it wasn't anything Shawn recognized. If only the roommate would leave the room so he could ask her what she was listening to… and things like that. He couldn't though, he promised he would see that other girl again, even though Shawn was quickly losing his interest. Was it a dick move? Probably, but this was something he couldn’t really explain.

The second the roommate finally did emerge from her room, Shawn took another gulp from his beer and averted his eyes back to the screen. Way to show some interest.

"Stella, have you seen my knife?" she asked from the doorway.

Not surprising in the slightest. And they've all known her for about thirty minutes.

"No, what have you been using to open your boxes?" Stella asked.

"A pencil, and it sucks."

"You're using a-"

"Yes, you can stab with any item if you try hard enough!" the roommate said impatiently. "Now have you seen my pocket knife? It's black and teal?"

Shawn didn't know what possessed him to snatch up the item on the coffee table and hold it up to the roommate. But he did it, and he could only hope he didn't look crazy. "This one?"

Her dark eyes lit up as she took the item. "Thanks, dude." With a flick of her finger, she switched the blade open and swiftly went back to her room.

Was Shawn drunk or was that kinda hot?

Like magnets, Shawn and Brian turned to each other with similar looks on their faces. They both silently agreed, yes, this girl is probably definitely a badass and kinda hot. Did you see the legs on her? Shawn quirked his eyebrows and paid attention to the TV again, even though they were in between races.

"I know that look," Stella said, her bubbly tone turning for the first time that evening.

Talk about being a deer in headlights...

"What look?" Camila asked.

"You know, when we see a cute person and silently agree on how cute they are. And you silently decide which one of you is gonna make a move."

"Oh, that look." Camila smiled, glancing at the two blushing boys.

Shawn wanted to argue, but his mind was on a pair of beautiful legs and a sexy knife. This time, when the door opened again, his heart skipped a beat. What the hell is happening?

"Hey, Stella," the roommate said again. She was holding a pair of thick, platform ankle boots. "Do we have any shoe polish?"

The boots alone put Shawn's mind on overdrive. He had to have this girl. He had to see those legs with those boots. He took another hefty gulp of his beer and tried to settle his… everything. He was very much attracted to this girl, but it's not like he could perform again after doing so a couple of hours ago. That's what was so weird. Shawn was physically spent, but he still found himself eyeing someone new. He was insanely curious about this girl, and not just her legs. Why does she have boots like that? Why was she wearing such a beat up t-shirt? Why was she so late to unpack?

"I don't have any, I know that much," Stella told her, and back into the room she went.

"Is she seeing anybody?" Shawn asked, unable to control herself.

Stella raised her eyebrows, surprised. "She doesn't want me telling you her business."

"So that's a yes?"

"It means I'm not telling you her business."

"Oh, so I should ask her directly?"

"No!"

"Can I talk to her?" Brian asked.

"No!" Stella snapped. She sighed and glanced at the bedroom door. Then she leaned in towards the group and spoke quietly. "She's going through something right now. If either of you try anything, she will bite your head off. Trust me, I've seen it happen."

Shawn chuckled, only taking this as a challenge. "A feisty one, eh? Nothing I can't handle."

Stella looked him dead in the eyes. "She has a pocket knife, and she's not afraid to use it."

It was silent apart from the game's music playing from the TV. Then, Camila spoke up.

"You two are some of the thirstiest people I've ever met. Just have fun with your friends and stop thinking about getting laid for a second!"  She lightly smacked Shawn on his shoulder. "You literally had a one night stand before you got here!" Then she turned to Stella. "And what kind of people do you room with? She's so unlike you! Like, I have so many questions."

So it wasn't only Shawn and Brian who were curious about this mystery girl.

"She is my friend," Stella firmly replied. "We have things in common that have nothing to do with how we dress ourselves. And again, she is not in a place for whatever Tweedledee and Tweedledum have in mind."

Her optimism and perkiness was long gone. She was completely serious and defensive, so Shawn let it go for now. Besides, it's not like he didn't have another option in the floor above. Although, that didn't seem so appealing anymore. He hadn't seen anything like this mysterious roommate, and he was interested in solving that mystery.

"What's her name, anyway? You gotta tell me that at least," he said to Stella.

"Ann. Annalise Flores."

Little did Shawn know, Annalise Flores would be the one to give him the air he breathes.

~

I chuckled, completely blown away by this little anecdote. "How do you remember this and I don't?"

Shawn shrugged, his eyes still on the road. "You were busy, and probably isolating yourself, so that's why you don't remember. No one has ever stood out to me so much in the span of five minutes the way you did. I knew that night wouldn't be the last time I saw you. And I was right."

My cheeks were burning, and I couldn't help but smile. "Well, Stella was right. I had just broken up with Luca at that time. The depression set me back a little bit, so that's why I was unpacking so late. And I didn't want anyone trying to pursue me. So I'm glad you didn't make your move that night."

It was a soft moment in the midst of the weird, awkward circumstances we had put ourselves into. Shawn knew how to bring light to times like these, and it reminded me of why I adored him so much.

_______

taglist: @normalcyisoverrated-beyou @ilsolee @mendesromano @1-800-khalid-mendussy @kitykatnumber @strangerliaa @dylshoney @iloveshawnieboi @poppyshawn @shawnsunflower @shawnvvmendes @calyumthomas

[adoregoldenharry]

Pop Princess h.s.

So this is a story I am writing on Wattpad only. This is only a snippet and it is currently ongoing. If you are interested then you can read it here: Pop Princess h.s. 

(Not my gif)

My wattpad user : adoregoldenharry

Description:

Welcome to the world of fame and riches. Where Women and men are exploited for their god given talents. Kalisto Reed is anything but the average American girl. She's a pop icon turned disaster, as the gossip magazines like to put it. She finds herself in a girl group amongst others with a dream. One day she meets Harry Styles, the golden boy of pop music. Are they too different in each other's eyes? Or will that bring them together?

The beat of the wind lolling through the sky was calm and controlled. Palm leaved trees barely moving opposed to the usual impromptu force of wind. I sat outside on a dark wood lawn chair with blue and yellow striped cushions. The vitamins of the sun painting onto my skin and leaving their mark. The remnants of last night playing hide and seek in my brain.

Not much happened besides watching Shawn getting his face mushed into his cake by his family and everyone pointing their phones at him. I remember smiling and enjoying the moment knowing that someone could send me a video or two later on. The only other eventful thing would be after the conversation I had with Harry in the kitchen, we had gone our separate ways. I did catch his eyes looking for mine every chance it was allowed. It made me a little self conscious.

I was just staring into the sky with my over sized designer lenses. The clouds were coming in and slowly ridding the beams of light from the sky. I sighed watching the sunshine drift away. Closing my eyes seemed like the only solution to eternal relaxation on this day, so it's what I did. Then the door bell rang. "You're kidding me." I sat up sliding through the patio doors through to the entrance of my house.

"Were you swimming?" Shawn asked looking at my bikini. I shook my head moving aside to let him in. He was rather dressed up tonight aside form his usual jeans and tee shirt. His red dress shirt completed by the dark tone of his pants. Curls bouncing from his head in a 'I forgot to brush my hair' aesthetic. He was always one for dramatics. "Not that I don't love you and all but what are you doing here," I closed the door following him to my couch. Shawn sat himself on my leather couch bring me down with him. I could already feel my thighs getting stuck to the seats. "Since its my birthday..."

"You're birthday was yesterday." I interrupted him. He glared at me pulling a small giggle out of me. "As I was saying," He reiterated, " Since it's my birthday some friends and I are going out bowling tonight and I would like you to come." At this point I was already shaking me head. His jaw dropped and he stood abruptly from the couch. "And why not."

I shrugged, "I'm having a self care day."

"Move it to tomorrow," Shawn slouched back onto the couch. He was always so adamant. Honestly if it wasn't for him I would probably never leave my house. I found it comforting to be home where nobody could gossip about me or take an ugly picture that would be stuck on the Internet forever. He kept his eyes glued to me and before I knew it his bottom lip started puffing out. "No no, don't you start with that," I shoved his shoulder. Somehow some way this guy made his eyes sparkle in a way that it was just impossible to refuse any of his wishes. His charm and sleekness so intricate and obviously trained into him. He was a poodle.

I adjusted the strap on my bikini, rolling my eyes. "Fine."

He jumped up and pulled me into a hug. He hurried me and pushed me to my room to get changed. I rubbed my temples thinking about my absence of needing to find the right thing to wear. Settling with a color block inspired jumpsuit that really ended up being louder than I expected when I purchased it online. I looked at myself in my full length mirror studying what I saw. It's something I tried to get myself to stop doing yet here I was, doing it. For most of my life I've let my body define me because it was the epitome of this business. If you weren't pretty you would never make it far. People always made sure to let up their opinions on that. Being in the lime light was not fun or validating. It was toxic.

"You almost ready," Shawn shouted from the living room. With one last look I swept up my shoes to put on on the couch.

The sun barely started falling from its place in the sky. Street lamps igniting and making their nightly appearance. The top of Shawn's Jeep had been removed weeks ago according to him and it felt great. Nothing like a beach cruiser in a beach town. "Who are these friends that we're joining," I closed the mirror flap in front of me after applying lip gloss. "Oh you know," his voice faltered and his eyes kept on the dark asphalt.

I held my head up by my right arm leaning on the car door. My eyebrows shifting upwards waiting for him to continue his answer. "Just uh, Lenny, Kels, Aaron, uh Camila..."

I jumped in my seat. "Camila? You're serious."

"Look Kal, I know you don't exactly get along but please just do this for me." I huffed sitting straight back in my seat.

It was way more than not just getting along between me and Camila. There was this intense aura that surrounded the two of us when we were near each other. It was discomforting and unbeknownst to me why she baited such bad energy between us. It started when I first met her. Camila brought this sweet and girl tactic around with her. When I first started hanging around Shawn he introduced us and we got on well, so I felt. We were at a party at a mutual friend's house and took shots while making fun conversation.

That same night Shawn got up to use the restroom leaving us two to each other. Her first words alone with me were etched into my brain. "Don't get too comfortable, some people don't last too long around here." Ever since then she gave me a stink face at every event I saw her. Yet she loved to be around Leah, Audrey, and Mikayla. I was apparently some sort of bad omen to her. "I knew if I told you she was going you wouldn't come." I didn't answer, I just thought about what sort of night I was in for.

"And I really wanted you to come." He glanced back and forth between the road and me.

The bowling alley wasn't full to our luck. If it had been it would be Shawn's discretion to whether we would stay or not. We spotted our group at some lanes near the other side of the building.

"Harry is here. Why is Harry here. When did you two become so buddy buddy. You didn't say he was coming." I mumbled an edge of panic showing. He grabbed my wrist pulling me towards everyone. "Did I not say he was coming, I thought I did." I had a few choice words for my friend right now but we were too close to everyone at this point for me to shout like a sailor. Camila stood up and rushed to Shawn, hugging him and letting shrill noises come out of her mouth. I smiled at her which she didn't bother to return. Run up on me, I dare you.

I found myself in front of Harry who had a knowing grin on his face. "What a pleasant surprise." I rested my hands on my hips walking up to him where he sat on one of those plastic swivel chairs. "Fancy seeing you here, love." He stretched his long arms out and snuck them around my waist bringing me in for a tight hug. He smelled like vanilla and silk. I really hoped that harry couldn't feel or hear me sniffing him in. That would be very, not good.

"Be right back, I gotta go pick my balls." Harry laughed and stood up from his seat. "I'll come with you." We walked past the counters dividing the floor and the arcade. Lights were flashing in and out with loud stints of sound effects. The wall of balls not too far out from there. I tapped my hand on chin looking at the sizes and colors. "Why are the cute ones always so heavy," Harry stifled a laugh covering his mouth. I rolled my eyes jokingly, "Boys."

I decided on a nice orange color distorted one, only because I could actually carry it. Harry, however, whipped it right out of my hands holding it to his side with one arm. I tried to reach for it to which he protested. Insisting on carrying it for me.

He was saving the chivalry that men killed centuries ago. I could carry my own ball so to speak. I was honestly surprised by the night. Everyone seemed to have so much fun. I was happily entertained by the humor being passed around. Harry and Shawn were two jokers in cahoots. I couldn't stop laughing at one point to which I was of course teased about. Camila wasn't any bother either and I appreciated it. She stayed in her lane and I stayed in mine. I found myself staring a couple seconds too long at Harry.

The way his dimples got bigger with every inch of his smile. How he brushed his chiseled hands through his hair very often. Also how he focused with every sense on a person when they spoke. I was seeing experiencing his famous traits and wow did they project. He was mellow and hyper at the same time. It was exciting to watch. Harry turned to me and poked my cheek only lengthening my smile. I looked over to Shawn who was smirking at me. I sat up straight turning my attention back to Kels who was now rolling her heavy spheric rock down the lane. She got a strike and carefully walked back towards the ball return as she avoids slipping on the waxed floors. I've taken a spill or two in my time. Don't really like to talk about it.

It was ten till eleven and the alley was a little more packed. People were starting to recognize faces within the group so it was decided that after one more game that would be it for the night. I decided to pull out of the last game and strolled along to the arcade. I slid my hands over the air hockey table that sat vacant. Feeling for any air that might come from it. I huffed after I realized it had to be paid for before it turned on. 'What a let down' I thought to myself, leaning against the hunk of metal. "Wanna play with me?"

Harry walked up right behind me. I looked over my shoulder and saw a shit eating grin on his face that made me snort a bit of laughter. I nodded and stalked to one side of the air hockey table as he slipped a coin in the slot. Harry scrunched the sleeves of his black long sleeve up to his elbows. Slapping his hands together and then rubbing them in competition. I bit my lip trying not to give him the laughs he wanted. He could take them so easily from me. I wanted this to be harder but, he was so good and I was so easy for him. Right?  "Fuck," Harry shouted when I made the first point. I jumped and cheered for myself while Harry furrowed his eyebrows readying himself for the next one.

I was sweating after six back and forth points. I needed just one more to knock him off. "Kal don't even think about it," Harry said watching me trying to cheat just a little.

"You don't even know what I was going to do," I dropped my shoulders staring at him in faux disbelief. Harry flipped his hair dramatically getting into another silly stance. I let the puck go back to the middle and tapped it towards him. He hit it back with a little more aggression than I had. I needed a strategy so I thought of something on the fly. "I really love the way your nails are painted," He picked up his paddle looking down at his nails. "Thanks I-," I smacked the puck with my paddle as fast as I could. The puck passed his slot down into the table. The scoreboard making noise announcing that I was the winner.

Harry's jaw had dropped and gently slapped his puck onto the table. "You tricked me."

"Oh. Did I? I'm sorry." I apologized with no guilt on my face whatsoever. He shook his head and crossed his arms walking around the table. He stuck his hand out to me mumbling a 'good game' to which I happily took. I was definitely a sore winner and like to rub my winnings in peoples faces sometimes. It was harmless on my end though so I will definitely keep doing so. Our friends were nearly done with their game. We looked for somewhere to sit and amazingly there was nowhere to drop our bottoms on seats. "Come on," Harry lead me back to the arcade where I had whooped him.

His tall figure bent down and stepped into the photo booth sitting on the small red bench. He held the curtain open for me coaxing me in with his eyes. The way he his stare held so much power was frightening. I squeezed in seeing that he took up most of the seat because well he wasn't the smallest person. He towered over me when we were standing and similarly when we sat. "We don't fit Harry," I laughed at how uncomfortably we sat. "Alright that's it." Harry rounded his hands at my hips and lifted me slightly to stand so he could position himself under me. Bringing my hips down so now I was sat on him. My breath quickened at the feeling and I felt light headed for a great moment. And for the next couple of minutes we just sat there. Enjoying each other's company. Until he started telling jokes that is. But I still enjoyed it. "Hey," I spoked trying to gather his attention, "Wanna do something fun."

Harry gave me quizzical look before I pulled three dollars out of my pocket. "You just carry change around like that in your pocket," I shrugged. Slowly straightening the dollars and then shoving them into the photo machine. We looked through the frames and filters finding the perfect ones for us. "Definitely that one." Harry poked a classy white frame for our strips. I agreed letting him poke the buttons. And not just because he had to lean and press his front against my back to do so. I felt a fire in my tummy that wanted to be let out. I didn't have the water to put it out. Not yet.

I pressed start and it began counting down. "Oh god what do we do." I never knew how to pose for these things. Harry placed his hand on the side of my face bringing it to sit on the side of his. We smiled and looked into the camera. Next we decided on a silly face and stuck our tongues out at each other. After the flash went off we both started laughing. His laugh was so sweet and melodic. It felt like the harmony of angel cries. Our laughs were quieting down but the intensity between us got louder. Green Rain by Mvzonik started to play in the background on surround sound in the bowling alley. I bit my lip again feeling like I was loosing control. Harry's eyes swiftly moved to my lips. Observing me in a very noticeable way. We had long forgotten about the photos.

I brought my hands up to his neck and his moved to my waist. In less than a second my lips were on his. They were so silky and plump, every girl's dream. His hands caressed my sides holding me still in place. The moment of our lips molding into each others felt blissful. Our eyes closed and yet it was pretty evident that the flash went off one more time. We pulled away staring in each others' eyes. Harry's mouth still slightly open and panting from current activities. I brushed his hair on the side with my hands. "Hey are you guys in there," a loud banging on the side of the machine. Harry and I jumped apart. I stood up almost bumping my head and fixed myself to make sure nothing looked out of place. I drew open the curtain walking out seeing Shawn standing against the wall, legs crossed. "Everyone's done let's get out of here and get you home."

I nodded looking back at Harry. "I can drive her." Harry spoke looking at me then to Shawn. "Yeah Harry can take me." Shawn nodded with a mischievous smile and gave me a hug. He shook hands with Harry talking a few words before leaving the two of us. Harry looked down at me making my cheeks turn red. Looking at him meant thinking about what just happened in this photo booth right next to us. He leaned over me with one hand on my waist. Plucking our two photo strips from the black plastic slot. "I rather like them."

Harry handed me one strip. I held the paper carefully in my hands not to wrinkle it. Three photos adorned the glossy memoir. One of us smiling, another of us being goofy, and the last of us sharing a kiss. A shy smile crept on to my face eating away at my nerves. "So do I." I laid my head on his chest and he wrapped his arms around me. We stood there for a few seconds before decided to head out. "You know if these photos ever get out, the media is going to have a field day."

"Well we did willingly hang out in public and made out in a photo booth. So I'd say we deserve it." We laughed walking hand in hand to his car.

[5hfanfiction]

Why Did I Get Married?

Part 11: Truce?

“Hello Hailee,” Camila smiled sweetly. “Can we talk?”

When the secretary’s eyes fell upon her boss’ wife and the woman who hated her with every fibre of her being, the only words one could’ve used to describe how Hailee felt was ‘scared shitless.’

She pushed herself away from her desk and started looking for a way to run, but unfortunately for her, there was only one way to leave her desk and Camila was standing there smiling at her.

Smiling? Ha! As if Hailee was going to fall for that. She was a tiger waiting to pounce on its prey.

Hailee was on her feet and started backing away to the wall. “Listen Camila, I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t mean to cause any drama in your life and your marriage. I swear.” The singer kinked an eyebrow at her. She didn’t know why Hailee was going on about this, but she decided to play along.

“You’re sorry?” Camila scoffed. “Sorry for ruining my marriage? Sorry for the fact that I can’t even look at my wife because of your dumb mistake!” She took slow steps towards the woman. “You’re a despicable human being, Hailee.”

The secretary’s back was now pressed against the wall. “I know I am. I didn’t know what I was thinking when I kissed her. I was drunk but that doesn’t constitute for the fact that what I did was wrong and I’m extremely sorry, Camila.” She cowered away from her boss’ wife.

Realising the woman was scared enough, Camila cracked a smile and laughed. “Chill, Hailee. I’m not going to stab you.” She stuck her hand out for the woman to hold it.

Hailee just stared at it, not making any move to grab her hand. “That sounds like something a person who’s going to stab you would say.”

Camila rolled her eyes and grabbed her hand and dragged her along. “Come. I want to talk to you.” She pushed open the doors to her wife’s office and told Hailee to take a seat whilst she sat at the edge’s of Lauren’s desk.

“Are you going to fire me? I’m not qualified for anything else besides a secretary, and I really like my job,” Hailee said in a scared tone. “I could probably go into singing but you’re like incredible and your songs. Wow. I could never compare to any of that.”

Camila pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed heavily. She was having second thoughts about actually stabbing the woman.

“Can you relax for a second? I’m not going to fire you. Yet,” she muttered the last word. “I just want to talk.” She said frustratedly. “Lauren told me what happened between the both of you. And I guess, if anyone I should be mad at, it should be you.”

The secretary looked down at her lap.

“But I don’t hate you. It doesn’t mean what you did wasn’t wrong, but I’ve…” Camila paused. She wasn’t going to lie right now. “I’ve hated you long enough. You’ve been there for my family when I wasn’t and I must thank you for that…so thank you. And I’m sorry for the way our relationship deteriorated over the years.”

Hailee looked up at the brunette in sheer shock. “Are you seriously apologising to me? I’m the one who should be sorry! I’ve been the reason your marriage is the way is it right now.” She sighed heavily. Remorse evident in her voice. “I’m so sorry, Camila. It was never my intention to hurt any of you, especially Izzy.”

Camila looked at the woman and could see how visibly sorry she was. “I’m not saying that you’re not responsible, but you’re not solely responsible. Lauren and I should also be held accountable for what happened between us." 

Hailee nodded in understanding. "Okay. I uh…”

The singer shook her head and smiled softly. “Truce?” She stuck her hand out for the woman to take. “I’ve been so hurt and mad over this for way too long, that even though it was damaging my marriage, I couldn’t even look pass this. I’m ready to move on Hailee, and that means…” Camila cringed slightly, “That means forgiving you.”

The secretary took the woman’s hand and shook it gently. “Truce.” She felt a bit relieved.

“But that doesn’t mean that I want you breathing down Lauren’s neck or hovering over my daughter,” she glared.

Hailee nodded furiously. “I totally understand. Hell, I’ll back away completely if I have to.”

Camila got off the desk and patted Hailee on the head. “Chill. I’m kidding….not exactly,” she pulled out a pocket knife from her jacket and smirked at Hailee’s reaction. Camila grabbed the apple off her wife’s desk and began to slice it. Popping a piece into her mouth. “But Lauren says you help her out when I’m not there and I really appreciate that. It’s just…I guess you need to know your place.”

***

“Well, well, well would you look at that,” Maggie Jauregui said as she paused at the couple’s bedroom door. “I never thought I’ll see the day where Camila is moving back into the unholy room that is Camren.”

Lauren threw a pillow carelessly at her sister who dodged it with ease. “What are you doing here? Who even let you in?”

“My beloved niece allowed me to enter your humble abode,” Maggie smiled sweetly at her sister. She propped herself against the doorframe looking on at the couple.

Camila rolled her eyes. “I thought I told Izzy not to open the door for strangers.” She stuck her tongue out at the woman.

Maggie fake gasped. “Ouch, Camzii. To think I thought we had something special. Something real,” she approached the woman and held her hand looking into her eyes. “I thought we were something.”

Camila laughed and shoved the woman away. “Why aren’t you an actress? I swear you’re so extra sometimes.”

“That’s why I’m a model,” Maggie winked. “Those bitches can be so extra, oh my god. Have you seen how some of those walk that Victoria Secret’s runway? Like y'all the lingerie is ugly, but they’re working it which makes me wanna empty my bank account on that shit.”

Lauren stared at her sister in awe. Wondering where half the shit that comes out of mouth actually comes from. “Mags…you’re a Victoria Secret’s Model. Did you just…did you just diss yourself?”

The woman shrugged. “Self deprecating is what I do best to be honest,” she looked around the room. “Anyway, what’s going on here? You’re moving back in?” Camila nodded. “Are you gonna start having sex again?”

“What’s sex?”

The three women in the room spun around to be greeted to Isabella Jauregui. The kid sure did have impeccable timing, just like her mother; who always seem to catch Hailee and Lauren in a position that Camila did not like one bit.

Maggie stooped to her niece’s height. Both Camila and Lauren were scared out of their minds.

What was Maggie going to tell their daughter?

“That’s a lovely jacket you got there kiddo,” Maggie acknowledged. “Can I get it? I think it’ll look cute with my jeans, don’t you think?”

Izzy shook her head 'no’. “But you can’t fit in it, tía.”

Maggie fake gasped and clutched chest. “Are you calling me fat?”

Izzy giggled. “No! I’m not. You’re beautiful just the way you are.”

The child’s aunt blushed. “What the hell, why is a kid smoother than me?” She ruffled her niece’s hair. “But you’re even more beautiful. Between you and me,” Maggie whispered loudly into the child’s ear. “You’re more beautiful than your mummys.” She pretended to shush Izzy so she wouldn’t say anything.

Izzy zipped her lips and giggled.

Her parents breathed a sigh of relief. Thank God the child had a very short attention span.

Maggie stood up and winked at Izzy’s parents.

“What are you doing, mummy?” Izzy asked as she went and sat on her parents’ bed.

Camila and Lauren sat on either side of their daughter. “Well, mummy and I would be sleeping in the same room again.”

Izzy furrowed her eyebrows. “Why?” Her parents had never actually told her why they weren’t sleeping in the same room, she also never questioned it.

Camila looked over at Lauren. They were both at a lost for words. Not exactly sure what to say, but they didn’t want to tell her too much to worry her.

“Well mummy used to never like to share a bed with me. She used to snore a lot.” Lauren pretended to snore causing Izzy giggled. “So now that she got some medicine from the doctor, she’s coming back in here with me.”

“Is that okay with you, princesa?” Camila asked her daughter who still seemed a bit confused, but she didn’t want to ask anything to hurt her parents feelings.

Izzy nodded. “Yeah I am. Can we all sleep in here tonight? Like a sleep over?”

Lauren kissed her on her forehead. “Sure, princesa. Whatever you want. We can watch a movie too.”

“Frozen?!” Izzy asked excitedly as she began to bounce up and down on the bed.

Maggie groaned loudly. “Ugh. What is it with children and this dumb movie?”

“Frozen isn’t dumb!” Camila and her daughter said simultaneously.

“Ugh. Children,” the model rolled her eyes. “Are you done with moving back into the room anyway?”

Lauren nodded. “Yeah, we are. It was basically just Camila’s clothes, shoes and her guitar. That’s about it.”

“Right. Right,” Maggie shrugged. The room fell quiet, Lauren kept staring at her sister waiting to discover what her purpose of being in their home was.

But then again, she was always in the Jauregui - Cabellos’ home.

“Why are you here, Maggie?” Lauren decided to ask. “Something we can help you with?”

The woman shrugged. “Nah. I was just in the neighbourhood. I guess I should…” she pointed out the door and started backing away. “Nice to see y'all are working things out.”

Lauren stood up and followed her beloved younger sister out their bedroom door. “Mags, wait,” the model stopped and turned to face her. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong,” Maggie avoided eye contact with her sister. “I’m fine.” She looked up and smiled. But Lauren wasn’t buying it. “It’s just…” Maggie sighed heavily. “Mom and Dad.”

Lauren kinked an eyebrow, “What’s going on with them?” She guided her sister to the living room and took a seat. “Is it the divorce?”

The younger Jauregui nodded sadly. “I just…I don’t know why they’re divorcing you know?” She placed her hands over her face and sighed. “I always idolised their marriage. I mean, I don’t even know if I want to get married, but they were always so in love. What happened to them?”

Lauren opened her mouth to speak but shut it. Was she really going to break this to her sister?

“People break up for many reasons, Mags.”

Maggie sighed and shrugged. “Yeah I guess.” She couldn’t understand why her parents were divorcing. Whenever she asked her parents, they always have her a vague answer. Though Maggie may seem hyper and extremely happy, she was a very sensitive person. Her family knew that. “I should probably be going. I have a flight to catch later.”

“Where are you going?” Camila asked as she took a seat on the chair’s armrest near her sister-in-law.

“I’m heading to LA for a quick photo shoot with Barbara. Then I have to head to New York,” Maggie stood and fixed her clothes. “I’ll see you when I see you. Bye mini me,” she lifted her niece and wrapped her arms tightly around her aunt.

“I love you, tía,” Izzy said as she placed a kiss on her aunt’s cheek. “Bring me candy when you’re coming back.”

Maggie smiled. “Aw. I love you too, kiddo. I’ll bring you back so much candy, you’ll get sick eating it. Be good for your mummy okay? Not your mama, she’s mean.” Lauren rolled her eyes. “Later, losers.”

“Mummy?” Izzy looked at Camila as her aunt exited their home. “Can we visit abuelita? I haven’t seen her in forever,” the child said dramatically.

Camila looked to her wife who shrugged. It had in fact been quite some time since they had visited Sinu and after the last therapy session, maybe it was a good idea to visit her mother.

***

“Mija,” Sinu’s thick Argentinian accent filled her daughter’s ears. She pulled Camila into a hug.

Camila smiled. “Hola mami. ¿Cómo estás?”

Sinu picked up her granddaughter and placed various kisses all over her face. “I’m good now. It’s been so long since I’ve seen mi linda nieta.”

Izzy giggled. “But I’m your only granddaughter.”

The old Argentinian gasped. “Oh really? I thought you had a hermana?”

Izzy shook her head 'no’. The banter between the granddaughter and grandmother caused Camila’s heart to swell. It was the same relationship she had with her mother when she was younger, and was extremely happy that her daughter had the same with Sinu. Unlike her relationship with Izzy; it needed some work but it was getting there.

After an hour or two, Izzy fell asleep on her grandmother’s couch. Camila decided to give her a moment to rest before they headed back home.

“I may be old, mija, but I can sense that there’s something on your mind,” Sinu said as she handed her daughter a cup of tea and took a seat next to her. “What’s troubling you?”

Camila sighed.

She wasn’t sure if she wanted to start discussing the topic of her father. Her mother tried to talk about him with her, but Camila always brushed it off. She hated him after all.

“It’s about Alejandro.”

Sinu nodded. “What about him? There’s so many things to talk about.”

Camila rolled her eyes. “I don’t really want to go in depth. It’s just…” She paused. “Have you spoken to Valentina since?”

“I have,” Sinu revealed causing her daughter to look at her in shock. “I don’t harbour any animosity towards her or Alejandro anymore, mija. Sometimes you have to let go.”

Camila scoffed. “The same way he let go of us?! I can’t believe you don’t even hate him! Or her for that matter!”

Sinu shushed her. “Listen, Camila. I’m not saying what your father did was right, because it wasn’t. I’m saying that I forgave him a long time ago. I won’t hold any sort of hatred in my heart,” She turned to look at Izzy who kicked off her blanket in her sleep. Sinu smiled. “If I didn’t marry him, I wouldn’t have had you and there wouldn’t have been her.” She gestured at her granddaughter.

“But he hurt you, mami.”

Sinu nodded. “That he did. However it’s been years. Of course I’m still hurt but I don’t hate him. I don’t hate Valentina, and I definitely don’t hate Rebecca.”

Camila furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. “Who’s Rebecca?”

“She’s your half sister,” Sinu silenced her before she could speak. “Don’t even think about saying anything. Rebecca is the only innocent one in all this mess your father caused. Besides you and I. It’s not possible to hate her, or blame her for anything.”

Camila sighed. Her mother did have a point. It wasn’t her fault their father cheated and ruined his first family’s lives.

“I…Okay. Have you met Rebecca as well?”

Her mother nodded. “After your father’s death, we all were going through something. I respected that you didn’t want to talk about it, but I did. After a few years, I allowed myself to forgive him and that’s when I decided to meet with them. Rebecca is a lovely girl,” Sinu smiled. “You’ll like her.”

Camila shrugged. “How old is she anyway?”

“She’s 16.”

“Ah. The annoying teenage years,” Sinu laughed. “Does she know who I am?”

Sinu nodded again. “She does. It’s kind of crazy you know? Your sister,” Camila looked at her mother pointedly. “Half sister. Is one of the biggest stars out there, and you have never met her.”

The singer kinked an eyebrow at her mother. “Are you insinuating something, mami?”

Sinu only smiled cheekily. “I’m not insinuating anything, mija.” She stood and gave her daughter a pat on the head. “I know you have a good heart. I know hating your father is killing you, because you two were like bread and butter. So when you’re willing to let go of the hate you have for him,” she took Camila’s phone and typed in a phone number before giving her daughter it back. “You should call that number.”

Camila looked down at her phone.

Rebecca: 1 305 467 9807

She locked her phone and looked up at her mother. Sinu had Izzy in her arms as the child had just woken up.

In a sense, Rebecca was in the same position as Izzy. Given the fact that both her parents had been fighting with each other and their marriage had been going downhill. Izzy didn’t deserve any of it and neither did Rebecca deserve any of the hate Camila had.

She wasn’t sure if she was ready to meet Rebecca or Valentina. She may have excused her half sister, but Valentina was the woman who took her father away, forgiving her was not on the table right now; or possibly ever.

***

On their way back home, Izzy begged her mother to stop at a park they had passed on the way to Sinu. Camila agreed because she needed to work on her relationship with her daughter. So she didn’t have any issues spending time with Izzy before she had to go back to work.

Camila’s phone began to ring while she was walking around with Izzy; when she looked at the caller, it was her manager; Roger.

“Hey, Roge,” the singer answered the phone. “What’s up?” She took a seat on a bench and watched her daughter who was a bit of a distance off. “Izzy! Stay where I can see you.”

Camila kept her eyes on her daughter, but the child approached a girl; possibly in her teens who was walking her dog, and began to pet it. Izzy always had a habit of petting dogs no matter where or when she saw them.

Hanging up her phone, the young mother approached her daughter and the younger girl. “Izzy, princesa are you ready to go?”

At the sound of her voice, the teenager froze, and slowly looked up at the woman.

“Mummy! This is my new friend Becky and this is her puppy Nugget,” Izzy giggled at the dog’s name. Completely unaware of her new friend’s reaction to her mother. It seemed to go a bit further than star struck.

The singer smiled at the girl. “Hey, I’m Camila. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Hi. Yeah. Um…I’m Becky,” the teenager introduced herself awkwardly. “I know who you are,” she laughed. “Well everyone knows who you are.”

Camila laughed softly. “Yeah, you’re right. I like your dog. He’s cute.” She stooped at the dog’s level and began petting him. He was extremely friendly.

The girl smiled. “Thanks. My mom got him for me when my dad died.”

“Oh. I’m sorry to hear that,” Camila frowned.

Becky shrugged. “It’s fine. No use in crying over something that happened over 10 years ago.”

Camila stopped petting the dog and looked at the teenager with furrowed eyebrows, because her dad; Alejandro passed away a little over 10 years ago. It must have been a coincidence.

Right?

“I should probably be heading home,” Becky stood and dusted off her pants. “My mom will throw a fit if she doesn’t see me in,” she looked at her watch. “Five minutes ago.”

Camila laughed. “I’m sorry for holding you back.”

Izzy pouted. “Can I get to see Nugget again?”

Her mother was about to protest but Becky spoke up. “I’m always in the park at this hour. So whenever you want to see him, you can ask your mummy to bring you.” She smiled.

“Yay! Mummy can you bring me here everyday?” Izzy turned to look up at her mother who laughed.

“Not everyday, princesa. But maybe once for the week,” she looked at Becky who nodded. “Tell Nugget adiós.”

Before leaving, Izzy hugged Nugget and then his owner. “It was nice meeting you Becky. I can’t wait to see you again!”

The teenager smiled and ruffled the child’s hair. “It was nice meeting you too, kiddo!” She then turned to address the child’s mother. “It was nice meeting you, Camila. I’ll see you around.”

Camila furrowed her eyebrows. “Wait, you’re not going to ask for a picture? Autograph? Nothing?”

Becky shook her head and laughed. “Nah, I’m good. I’m a fan but I’m not a major fan. I’ll keep the meeting forever engraved in my brain though.” She tapped her head and smiled. “Unless you want me to ask for those stuff?”

Camila laughed. “It’s okay. I just know there’s some crazy fans out there who wouldn’t have let me go without asking for a picture. But it was nice meeting you. I guess we’ll be seeing you.”

Walking away from each other, Camila failed to, or rather chose to ignore the fact that the girl sort of looked like her. She ignored the fact that she had the same smile as her, her eyes kind of looked like hers, and maybe her resemblance was a bit uncanny, but still.

People looked like each other didn’t they?

Despite the fact that she did have a half sister out there, who technically from what she knew, didn’t live too far from her mother.

It probably was just a coincidence.

***

“Laur,” Camila called when they reentered their home. “We’re back.”

Her wife stuck her head into the living room. “Hey, how was abuela’s?” She had an apron around her waist and oven mitts on her hands.

“Abuelita is fine. She said to give you a hug,” Izzy ran towards her mother and wrapped her small frame around her leg. Lauren laughed. “What are you making mama?”

“Your favourite, princesa. Chocolate chip cookies!” Lauren said excitedly. “I’m about to put them in the jar, do you want to help?”

Izzy nodded eagerly.

The family of three went into the kitchen, and watched as their daughter started putting the cookies away.

“Camz?”

Camila snapped out of her thoughts. “Yeah, sorry. What’s up?”

“Are you okay?” Lauren asked with concern evident in her eyes. “You seem distracted. Did something happen at your mom’s?”

Her wife shook her head and smiled. “It’s nothing to worry about, it’s just been a long day.”

“Camz,” Lauren said pointedly. Camila sighed heavily. “Princesa, why don’t you take two and watch tv for a bit, yeah? Then we’ll get started on dinner.”

Izzy nodded and grabbed at least five cookies, because why not?

Fuck, a cavity.

“So you know about my dad after today,” Lauren nodded. “I spoke to my mom about it and she told me that she had met up with Valentina and I guess…my half sister, Rebecca.” She sighed. “I just don’t know how to feel about all this. After everything my dad put my mom through, how could she forgive him and forgive her?”

Lauren took her wife’s hand in hers and looked her in the eyes. “Sometimes it’s better to let go of the pain, amor. No matter how much the person hurt you. You can still be mad at him, at her, but it’s better to let go. To move on.”

Camila hesitantly moved closer to Lauren and buried her face in her chest, “But I don’t want to.” She whined. “It’s so much easier to hate him. To hate her.”

The older woman laughed and awkwardly patted her wife’s back. “At least you’re not being unreasonable and hating your sister.”

“She’s innocent in all this I guess,” she pulled away from Lauren and sat on the island. “If I have to meet anyone, I’ll like to meet her first. Then work my way up to her…puta of a mother.” Camila took a bite of a chocolate chip cookie. “These are pretty good. I see why Izzy snatched a bunch.”

Lauren kinked an eyebrow. “And you didn’t tell her to put back some?”

Camila shrugged. “You didn’t tell her anything either.”

“That’s because I didn’t see!”

“Ugh. Can we go back to my family dilemma please?” The singer asked dramatically. “Izzy doesn’t even eat much junk food, she wouldn’t die.”

Lauren took off the oven mitts and tossed it on the island, taking a seat next to her wife. “What do you want to do about Valentina and Rebecca? Do you think you’re ready to meet either of them?”

Camila wasn’t sure if she was ever going to be ready to meet either one of them. She wasn’t even sure if she ever wanted to meet them to begin with. It had been over 10 years since her dad passed away; taking into consideration she never even attended his funeral, or acknowledged his existence or Valentina’s after her parents’ divorce.

“I think…” Camila paused. “I think in time, I’ll want to talk to Rebecca first. Then maybe…I don’t know I’ll like to speak to Valentina and get everything off my chest. It’s been 10 years. I have to let go one day, right?”

Lauren nodded. “Right.” She smiled. “And I’ll be here for moral support if you’ll like. If you want, we can kidnap Valentina, you can kill her, then we’ll dump her body in a lake and no one will ever know it’s us.”

Camila laughed.

“We can be Bonnie and Clyde 2.0.”

The singer shoved her wife playfully. “I hate her, Laur. But not enough to kill her. Think about my fans! They’ll never get to hear all the good stuff I’ve got hidden under my sleeves.”

Her wife rolled her eyes. “Rightttt. Let’s not forget you have a daughter to take care of.”

“Izzy is a big girl, she can take care of herself.”

Lauren facepalmed. “How are you a mother again?”

The couple laughed.

After their last therapy session, it hadn’t been long, but it seemed as though their relationship was progressing a bit. Of course it wasn’t back to normal, but one step at a time.

***

“So uh,” Lauren said awkwardly. She was clad in her pyjamas along with her wife, who was standing at the foot of the bed. “Which side do you want? Like I know you sleep on the left side, but do you still want it? Because if not, you can have the right side.”

Camila laughed softly at her wife’s awkwardness. She was a bit nervous about sleeping in their old bedroom. Sharing a bed with Lauren after so long was bound to be awkward, but thankfully for Izzy who had demanded a sleep over, their first night back together wasn’t going to be that bad.

“Either side is fine, Laur,” she tugged back the duvet. “But I’ll take the left side if you insist.”

The feel of the bed was both comforting and scary. It had been so long that she actually forgot what it felt like. Scary; because their relationship was only going to progress and she wasn’t sure how she was going to keep up. Given that again, it had been so long.

“Princesa,” Camila called their daughter, “Why don’t you put in the movie and come up here?”

Izzy nodded. “Is Frozen okay?”

“No.”

“Yes.”

Lauren rolled her eyes. “Yeah. Fine. Whatever. Dumb movie,” she muttered under her breath. “Not like we’ve seen it a million times but okay. Frozen again. Woo! Let it go. Libre soy. Bullshit.”

“Did you say something, mama?” Izzy looked at her mother in confusion.

Lauren smiled. “No baby. I just can’t wait to watch Frozen! You know how much I love Olaf.” She said excitedly.  “Now come on. Get in bed and let’s start it.”

A couple minutes into the movie, Izzy passed out. She was snuggled into Camila’s side and Lauren couldn’t help but admire the sight. It had been a couple months since she saw this. And a little over a year since the three of them did this.

Of course, they had family movie night, but it was usually in the living room; where Izzy would pass out a few minutes into the movie, and Lauren would’ve taken her up to her room.

“She’s so precious,” Camila whispered looking down at their daughter. “I can’t believe we made this. We made her.”

Lauren smiled. “Me either. She’s perfect. You’re perfect.” She whispered out the last part. It was so soft that if Camila hadn’t been paying attention, she wouldn’t have heard it.

Luckily, it was dark otherwise, Lauren would’ve seen the blush that had spread across her wife’s face.

“This is weird,” Camila revealed. “Not weird in a bad sense or a good sense, but it’s just…different.”

“Well we haven’t shared the same room in a little over a year, and we never slept in the same bed since, so yeah. It’s bound to be super weird, Camz,” Lauren said as she laughed softly. “And you made it even more awkward by pointing it out.”

Camila giggled, her body vibrations causing their daughter to stir in her sleep. “Oh right,” she looked down at Izzy. “It’s so cool having a mini version of you. Like wow. This is mine. This is me. I created this?! Like wow.” The woman rambled looking at her daughter.

Lauren sighed and laid down on the bed. “You’re weird, Camz.”

“You’re weirder, Laur,” Camila mimicked her wife. “Are you sleeping?” She asked after Lauren had been silent for a few minutes.

The photographer turned her head to look at her wife. “Nah. I’m just thinking.”

“About?”

“About us. About you. About everything I guess,” she sighed. “We’ve come a long way since that day in Spanish class.”

Camila smiled to herself at the memory. “Yeah, yeah we really did…” She paused and looked up at the ceiling. There were glow in the dark stars on it; something Lauren always wanted. “Thank you. Thank you for never giving up on me. I know how hard I am to be with. But I don’t want you to think that my love for you isn’t genuine.”

“You don’t have to thank me for anything, Camz. Ever,” Lauren took her wife’s hand that was wrapped around their daughter’s petite frame and kissed it gently. “I want to be the one for you, because you’re the one for me. You mean so much to me that I can’t imagine a life without you.”

“I know we’re not okay now,” Camila ran her hand through Izzy’s hair and locked eyes with her wife in the moonlit bedroom. “But…but I want to spend my lifetime loving you,” she began to sing softly. “If that is all in life that I ever do, I want to spend my lifetime loving you. If that is all in life I ever do…”

Lauren felt her heart accelerate at the sound of her wife’s melodious voice filling her ears. She had heard her singing this song once and she had assumed it was for her upcoming album. What she never once thought about was that this song was written about her.

“I will want nothing else to see me through. If I can spend my lifetime loving you.”

***

[camilawalkerr]

"if i had to do the same again I would.” // "would you laugh at me if I said I care for you?" // "you are a wonderful person. your friendship means a lot to me and you look very beautiful." // “i have an idea, it’s very uncool. it’s not illegal, technically. but it is a dick move.” // "i’m a simple man. i like pretty, dark-haired women and breakfast food.”

"If i had to do the same again I would.”

“So you’re going straight in for the kill, you know the rules.” she said with a strained laugh. It felt like drowning. She couldn’t breathe, but  she didn’t want to. If Liam meant throwing herself into the deepest part of the ocean, God she was going in headfirst. She watched him. The booze clouded her brain and sent ripples of warmth through her body like waves blanketing the sand. She hummed softly, the touch nearly tickling her, as her eyes drifted to the dock. “Liam?” She’s disappointed when he looks away, her fingers subconsciously dancing patterns on his skin, as her stare raised to his features. She felt his eyes on her before they followed his gaze. Camila watched their boat, with it’s chipping paint and fading words, rock softly in the water. Her thoughts were slowed, her judgement altered by the beer in her system, “Kissing you, Liam Torrcs,” Cami whispered and leaned in close to him. She felt his warm breath on her nose. “Would be anything but small nor stupid.” Her voice faded when the right punishment never came to mind. Pieces of his hair fell, tickling the curve of his eyebrow, as Cami swiftly pushes it away. Under the bleak light of the moon, she searched his features. Despite their glassy eyes, she looked sober, serious, about her decision. Cami hummed in agreement as she looked up to Liam. The light from the moon bounced off of the water and perfectly hit his cut features. The mocha in his eyes matched the color of the teddy bear he once won her sitting on her window sill. They were often red underneath, whether from countless sleepless nights he spent staring at his ceiling or the constant joint in his hands that dilated his blood vessels, she didn’t know. “Good, cause I think I wanna do it again.” Cami felt her cheeks flush scarlet and met his eyes. Their noses touched. Everything in her felt warm and electrified. In one second she was prepared and anxious and in the next, all she could think about was how warm Liam’s mouth was pressed against her own. She felt as if there was a raging inferno inside her heart. Cami felt her chest plummet and closed her eyes. “That’s a relief. I was beginning to think this entire thing was one sided.”

"Would you laugh at me if I said I care for you?”

Camila lay on the damp grass of the large field; the sun beating down harshly upon her. It was late afternoon. She moaned in pain as she lay on her side, clutching her knees to her chest with a growl of irritation, she pressed the heels of her palms against her eyes. Cami’s knees bounced up and down from the adrenaline that coursed through her. Tears of frustration rolled down her cheeks, her anger cooled when Liam glanced down at the ground, fiddling with his fingers. She rolled the inside of her lip between her teeth, “Do I gather from your polite lack of response, as I’m bleeding out in a strangers backyard that you’re planning my eulogy?”  Camila responded, and lip, despite her anguish, cracked a smile, however subtle.  This is what Cami was masterful at; supporting the group in spite of their dysfunction. This tempestuous boy whose brain was on fire with knowledge and alcohol and compassion.  When she was a little girl, she wondered if he would not just love her back, but love her how she loved him; wholly, unconditionally, and with purpose. She knew the answer now. “At this point, I’ll take what i can get from you. Can't help but wonder if this Is the last time that I'll see you,” she mused dramatically now, before laughing weakly. He was like the peace that she had always searched for. Her heart pounded in the same way as when she danced, her nerves stood on end like when she was buzzed, her breath hitched like when she stepped into the ocean on a cold day, “I wish I could say something that doesn't sound insane, but I’d never laugh at you Torrcs. I thought it was obvious that we care about each other moron. Now help me up, before I really drop dead.”

"You are a wonderful person. your friendship means a lot to me and you look very beautiful."

The flowers were woven perfectly into a crown that she bore on her soft brown curls, and yet the fairy lights hanging high above were arranged into pretty patterns, the absurd amount of lighting made her head pulse. The people surrounding her wore shining smiles complimented with kind words, and yet they were all liars. She hated it here mostly because the crowding conversations, the same ones her parents made her join, always seemed to completely drown the sounds of the ocean crashing against the sand. Camila never wanted to go to Midsommer for she never found the appeal of heavy jewelry and heels that made her feet ache, and yet here she was staring out at the horizon, that could no longer be seen in the dark of the night, trapped in a conversation she faded from a long time ago. A deep, audible exhale escaped her nose as she tried desperately to put out the fire in her chest. It had grown stronger and harsher by the interaction with the boy. Her shaky hands smoothed the fabric of his suit as if to release the building energy in her body, as she fiddled with his tie. “Please,” she stood straighter, “you flatter me too much. Seriously, do you see how good you look in the suit? Ladies are going to be lining up,” She played with the stray strands of her hair to busy her hands and conceal the shaking of her fingers.Liam Torrcs. Of course. His eyes were bright as always, his lips stretching into an effortlessly pure grin. The freckles adoring his sun kissed skin were pronounced under the fairy lights. The reflection of the shining moon could almost be seen in his rich brown hair. “Hey,” her fingers subconsciously tapped to the beat of the song as a bubble of laughter escaped her. At the melody of her best friend’s laugh, the one true familiarity Camila had always clung to, she began to feel the tightness in her chest fade as if it were a knot being untied, “things aren’t quite as bad when I have you around. You’ll always be my person.” She muses, as she places a chaste kiss against his cheek now. “Come on, one last dance?”

“i have an idea, it’s very uncool. it’s not illegal, technically. but it is a dick move.”

A handful of small, faint scars littered his face; one forming on the peak of his cheek where a gash opened a week prior and a fading bruise still sat. His lips were pursed, jaw tight, as her stare lingered. “This probably isn’t gonna end well, is it?” she asked delicately, her voice fighting against the sounds of the night. A pause fell between the four, inviting either to back out, as they all watched as Camila finished her piece. The quiet doesn’t last forever, unfortunately. She stands for as long as she can in the calm, listening to the routine chirp of birds echoing around her, as makes her last rounds before the customers leave the shop but Barron’s money floats in the back of her mind, insistent, prodding, like a fresh paper cut. Consciously, she glances back towards her friends, where both the money and their newly acquired gun lie inside, safely rolled up in the sleeves of the van. “ Thank you for your confidence, which i will now betray. We’ve already got people looking for Thomas, last week we almost had to bail you out of jail. Now, is not the fucking time for technicalities, before one of you end up dead.” But lately, Camila had taken to staring at Liam’s hands. At the way his sunglasses sat on his face and the way they often didn’t. At his arms and his legs. At the occasional flash of a tan line on his feet. At the way he furrowed his brow and bit his lip and beamed and frowned and laughed and held her hand like he’d never held anything so wonderful before. “ I get that whatever’s in that safe is the answer to all our problems. But people are washing up dead, every week. I can’t afford losing you guys too, so whatever it is… just do it without me.”

"i’m a simple man. i like pretty, dark-haired women and breakfast food.”

They’re sitting on the back porch swing of Thomas’s place, their thighs sticking to the seats like bubblegum from the summertime humidity.  There’s melodies pouring from the radio as she  hums along with the rhythm. Camila hands him his breakfast as she is draped across the seating, smoking a cigarette, and Liam is watching her.  She catches him staring and she feels her cheeks redden into crimson.“Why don’t you take a picture, photographer Liam?  it’ll last longer,” she punches his arm in jest, and  she laughs, they both do, a real laugh that eats away at her throat like a rabbit burrowing out of the earthen soil. They shove each other, sticking out her tongue, and she snickers to herself. He has a way of getting under her skin. Maybe that’s why she bruise so easily.  She’s smiling like she knows something he doesn’t. “Oh, totally. And I don’t like the quiet, that’s why you got invited.” She teases now, everything is quiet around them. A sleeping Lux and Thomas hidden away somewhere,  a winsome silence that wraps around you like a silk ribbon tenderly swaddles around a gift; that holds you together, so you don’t fall apart. It’s impossible to collapse around Liam, but so utterly possible at times, he makes her into a mosaic and thoughtfully pieces her  back together with calloused hands. “today feels like a memory already,”  She whispers more to herself than to him.  Liam smiles and she feels like it’s the first time she's seen his eyes illuminate in a twinkle of bokeh in weeks. The two  of them sit side-by-side, Cami and his fingers intertwined, she’s barely touched her food now. “Eat up, let’s catch some waves have a you and I day, hm?”

[deadcactuswalking]

“REVIEWING” THE CHARTS: 4th August 2019

Honestly I cannot write REVIEWING THE CHARTS this week properly because there are no new arrivals in the UK Top 40, so me and my Twitter followers have come up with ideas, but honestly I kind of want a break. I’ve been doing catch-up on catch-up with albums recently and I’m already really overwhelmed with that, so... will there be any new arrivals reviewed this week? No. Will this episode take literally 10 minutes to write? Yes. Is this pre-amble longer than the episode in word count? Maybe even that, but it feels refreshing to write one of these off in less than an hour like I used to be able to in 2018, and there are a lot of projects I’m working on related to both this series and the neglected YouTube channel that is intended to accompany the cactus brand, “Kanye Best”, including a Top 5 Best and Top 5 Worst Hit Songs of 1984 – or 2004 – list, so we’ll see that down the line, but for now, listen, let me just grind this out because nothing happened really, and I just want to have a chill-down week, I’ve done a Top 20 ranking on Twitter if you’re interested for more content this week.

Top 10

Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello are spending their third non-consecutive week at #1 with “Senorita”, and there doesn’t really seem to be much competition here.

Also in the top five, because it’s the British pop charts, we have two consecutive Ed Sheeran singles, with “Beautiful People” featuring Khalid standing still at number-two.

Running up to the runner-up is “I Don’t Care” featuring Justin Bieber, but I really think this one is gone after not moving this week, it’s been here too long at number-three for chart rules not to punish it.

What I am grateful for is number-four, as up three spaces is AJ Tracey’s “Ladbroke Grove”, a fantastic song.

Not moving at number-five is “bad guy” by Billie Eilish, which surprised me, I thought it would drop off pretty quickly after the Bieber remix.

Also staying steady at number-six is Lewis Capaldi with “Hold Me While You Wait”... why?

As I expected, “Cross Me” by Ed Sheeran featuring Chance the Rapper and PNB Rock is down three spots to number-seven, but I did expect it to drop a lot lower.

Another incredible song moving up in the top 10 this week is “3 Nights” by Dominic Fike, up six to number-eight, becoming Fike’s first top 10 here in the UK. I know we’re really late to this guy, if Australia’s reception to him is anything to consider.

MIST and Fredo’s “So High” is down a spot thanks to the climbers at number-nine.

Finally, we have a second new Top 10 entry, and it’s the first posthumous hit for Whitney Houston, remixed by Kygo, “Higher Love”, up five positions to #10, becoming Houston’s first UK Top 10 hit in more than a decade, and her 18th overall. It’s Kygo’s third, but don’t pretend you care about Kygo.

Climbers

Thanks to the video that went pretty viral, I’m having to my face my fondness for Chris Brown’s new single “No Guidance” featuring Drake once again and honestly I feel second-hand guilt for anyone who likes this song... in fact, that’s first-hand, I enjoy that track a fair bit and am not pleased to admit that. Last week’s Love Island soundtrack debut, and, yes, I’m not joking, is also a climber as “Sorry” by new DJ Joel Corry featuring Hayley May is up a pretty surprising 17 spaces to #21, barely missing the top 20, and I’m not really complaining, it’s a decent effort. Apparently it broke records for the most recognised song by Shazam ever, and that’s pretty hilarious considering that app is mostly irrelevant unless it leaks some info about some upcoming pop queen’s new era, in which case Shazam is a gift from the Gods. Also up 17 spaces is last week’s debut of “RAN$OM” by Lil Tecca... joy, yeah, apart from the coincidence that both our lowest debuts from last week have moved up 17 chart positions, there’s nothing fun about that song. Otherwise, “Ritual” by Tiesto, Jonas Blue and Rita Ora is up 12 spaces to #26 (although that doesn’t exactly match up, I’m trusting the BBC on this), and “Truth Hurts” by Lizzo is up five to #34.

Fallers

We have a few consecutive five-space-fallers here at #37 and #38, “I Spy” by Krept & Konan, Headie One and K-Trap, and “Summer Days” by Martin Garrix, Macklemore and Patrick Stump of Fall Out Boy respectively. I was thinking of how the Top 40 presentation on BBC Radio One and how it would flip from a pretty innocuous edited version of “Summer Days”, which is a nice, summery EDM tune no one could really get all too offended by unless they REALLY hate Macklemore (I don’t blame them if so), to a hard-hitting trap song that hits you several times in the CHORUS, with an intimidating voice commanding you to, “Suck your mother”. I’m sure that’ll appeal to all audiences. Apart from that, there’s nothing really worth talking about here. “Home” by D-Block Europe is down six spots to #31, “Crown” by Stormzy crashes down six positions to #19 (Not looking good for that upcoming album, but with how massive “Vossi Bop” was I’m sure nobody’s worried about this), and that’s all we have here that’s all that notable.

Dropouts & Returning Entries

Looking at what’s outside the Top 40, I swear the Official Charts Company manipulated the data purely out of spite for me criticising their format, leaving me with no songs to review and Christmas hits to fall back on, because there are new songs by Taylor Swift at #43, Drake at #42 and Liam Gallagher at #49, yet none of them could have crossed over? Instead of any of those songs, which, you know, would be interesting to talk about, “Bounce Back” by Little Mix returns for another underwhelming performance week at #39? Sure! There’s not even more than one drop-out to talk about here, we’ve only got “Grace” by Lewis Capaldi out from #30 and that’s definitely the recurrent streaming cuts rule – and it’s not like this was a boring, slow week. If I only talked about #41-60, which is half as many songs as I usually talk about, I would have seven new songs to talk about, well, perhaps six since I’ve already discussed “Lalala” (charting at #50 this week) by bbno$ and Y2K as a Featured Single – man, maybe I should bring that back – but still, that’s more than what I’m left with this week.

NEW ARRIVALS

#000 – “N/A” – Official Charts Company featuring the BBC

Produced by blasted buffoons and wacky wombats – Peaked at #1 in Abyssinia

Conclusion

Okay, so, I was debating on what to do for this section, but I think I’m just going to rate the new arrivals outside of the Top 40. Best of the Week would probably go to “Lalala” by bbno$ and Y2K to be honest, but Taylor Swift would be following closely with “The Archer” as an Honourable Mention. Worst of the Week would go to “Harder” by Jax Jones and Bebe Rexha for just being boring, and I might not have had a Dishonourable Mention in place of a tied Honourable Mention for the sake of memery, as I’d give that Sam Feldt song called “Post Malone” a joke placement here at least. It’s pretty sad I can predict my own jokes before I make them. Anyway, the fact, I’ve written an episode this long with no songs to review has honestly kind of impressed me, so follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank for more musical ramblings and I’ll see you next week, where hopefully we’ll have any songs to talk about.

[normanisource]

Spend a few minutes with Fifth Harmony, and it’s clear the group’s tighter than ever.

Normani Kordei, Dinah Jane, Ally Brooke and Lauren Jauregui have such electric chemistry, we literally had to cut out all the [laughs] from our interview because there were too many. The girls were cracking each other up throughout the whole thing.

And all those good vibes are sure to come through in their new music. Coming off of last summer’s “Work From Home,” 5H have proven themselves as hitmakers and are now taking more creative control of their sound. The group’s moving full speed ahead after Camila Cabello, one of its original members, bounced in late 2016.

Their next music will have “some R&B tones,” Dinah told us, and will hit on each of the girls’ favorite genres, with overtones of girl power and female empowerment throughout.

Read on for our interview with the group — plus their first cover as a foursome!

When did you guys realize you were friends in addition to bandmates?

Everyone: Awww that’s so cute!

Normani: We were on X Factor. We actually ran into each other before we were put into a group. I remember seeing Ally at my first audition, was it in Austin?

Ally: Austin, Texas!

Normani: Basically, my family… we had a rivalry. It was like, battle of the posters. My family was screaming, “Normani Normani Normani!” And Ally’s family had T-shirts… you guys roll deep.

Ally: They went all out!

Normani: I wouldn’t say it was necessarily a challenge to connect with one other because we were around the same age. I remember me and Dinah vibed heavily.

Dinah: Heavily! Like, we were low key starting to sleep over in each other’s hotel rooms.

Normani: I know! I borrowed your clothes!

Dinah: You did. We were that close. It was like that insane chemistry once you meet somebody. The connection was so crazy, we clicked instantly.

Normani: and I just feel like with everything we’ve been through together – even things that only we know about. Obviously we have each other to lean on. I think those moments make us even closer.

READ ALSO: Copy Fifth Harmony’s Style on Your Next Girls’ Night Out

How does each girl strengthen the group as a whole?

Ally: Well, Dinah, I admire your fun and playful self. I love how you always come in with music. You bring the life to the party and the energy to the room. That really helps, especially if we have a long day ahead or something, it’s really cool to see that. You’re always there pumping up the party and laughing. It just makes being here so much easier. It makes the environment so much healthier when it’s fun. I really admire that about you.

Dinah: Thanks Ally. You are super sweet! Ally… she’s like a little goofball too. It’s nice to know that there’s someone that carries the same energy. You’re always so playful. There’s times where she can be kind of like the “mom”. We’ve been calling Ally the “mother” of the group at times because she has that vibe where she cares so much and she’s on it with time. There are times where I fall short with getting to the lobby. She’s texting us saying, “We gotta get there, we gotta get there!” Just the push she brings into this group helps. Because there are times where you do fall short, and to have somebody to pick up your slack helps. You put us to work!

Normani: Well I was gonna compliment you (Dinah) but Ally did such a good job!

Dinah: You’re fake! [laughs]

Ally: I was going in order!

Normani: I feel like Lauren almost has this gift of making people feel safe through anything it is that we’re going through.

Dinah: It’s so true.

Normani: A lot of the time people almost forget that we’re human. We have things that go on with family and insecurities that we feel within ourselves. She [Lauren] has this way of making me feel comfortable and confident in myself and I feel like I can really talk to her through absolutely anything. There are conversations I can have with her that I feel like I wouldn’t have with anyone else. And I feel like we all play such a heavy role with each other but, there are just certain things that I can go to her for.

Lauren: The thing is, is that everyone brings so many different kinds of things to the table. Normani is such a hard worker, and she’s so disciplined…

Ally: Yes, Mani!

Dinah: So true.

Lauren: … and constantly putting in effort and making sure that she’s bettering herself and being the best version of herself she can be, and that for me is very inspiring because I’m the opposite [laughs]. I’m just kidding. But she definitely makes me feel like I can accomplish more if I can keep doing what I’m doing, and challenges me to want to be at her level.

Dinah: Spot on.

Who’s the best at IG? Shots fired.

Dinah: I was on a roll for a second.

Ally: Honestly, my game is getting up so…

Lauren: I’ve been on my A-game right now, I’m sorry.

Dinah: I was just stalking Mani last night.

Normani: I know I have a personal photographer.

Lauren: I think I’m just gonna push 20 bucks at her to take a photo of me today.

Normani: I feel like you can really get a sense of who we are as people because we’re so different.

Dinah: So different! Day and night.

Are guys scared to approach you now that you’re famous?

Lauren: Not the right guys.

Dinah: It’s funny because you kinda think it’s the right guy but it’s not.

Lauren: They’re either super not the right guy, or dope as fuck. There’s no in between.They’re either trying to get something out of you, or they think you’re super dope.

Dinah: There was this one guy who thought I was very intimidating because of who we are. My thing is when I come across somebody, when I think they’re super cute or handsome, I can’t play along with that because sometimes they take it as something like, “She wants me.” And it’s happened to me many times. When you’re trying to be kind to somebody and they take it as “dang, Dinah Jane likes me.” And I’m like “No, I just want to be your friend… like, why do you have to take it like that?”

Normani: For me, it’s kind of the opposite, cause I feel like in a way I can be so intimidating with me not even knowing it, and then the guy doesn’t call you and you’re like, “I’m cute! Come to me. Come here.” And then it’s like, “is there something wrong with me?”

Dinah: It’s hard. So all we want is a confident dude to come straight up…maybe. Just walk up and say, “Hey, what’s up?” And start from there.

What’s one question that you are often asked that you think a guy group would never be asked?

Normani: For instance, when “Work From Home” came out, we were asked a few times, “do you think you guys were dressed too sexy?”

Lauren: I’m pretty sure men are never questioned whether they’re acting too sexy. They’re actually glorified when all their clothes are off. Women love that shit, they’re like, “Yeahhh! You’re so hot!” But when girls take our clothes off, it’s, “Wow, she’s such a hoe.”

Normani: That’s happened to us throughout our whole career. When it came to performances, people would judge us on our performance outfits. They would say things like, “look at the hoe squad”. There were all these memes.

Lauren: And it’s normally girls! Regularly girls.

What’s the best part about having a built-in squad to roll with?

Ally: It’s really great because the four of us are really in sync with each other. We’re pretty open about most things. We try to respect each other as much as we can. For us, communication is really important. Also we enjoy a lot of the same things as each other! Like going to get frozen yogurt, or go to the movies, or talk about boys, exchange music, have fun at the red carpet and encourage each other with, “hey you look beautiful!”

Normani: We compliment each other a lot.

Lauren: It’s so important. I feel like especially being around other girls, it’s really easy to start picking yourself apart and being like, “Wow, she looks better than me” or, “My hair doesn’t look as good as hers.” It’s like, wait. [Why not just say], “You look dope, you look hot, I love your outfit.” Giving each other that energy changes the whole vibe of whatever we’re doing. If it’s a carpet or a shoot, you can feel in the pictures that we were all complimenting each other and we all felt good.

Ally: We truly live by female empowerment. Literally every day we try our best to do that.

Are you guys inspired by iconic girl groups like Spice Girls, the Supremes, TLC?

Normani: Absolutely. I know we’ve all grown up listening to Destiny’s Child, Spice Girls, TLC, Pussycat Dolls even. “Buttons” is my song. Danity Kane.

Dinah: Ooh, Xscape! I love them so much.

Normani: And it’s important to have strong individuals to paint the way for us. Without them doing what they did for music, and being our introduction, we probably wouldn’t even be!

Do you hope to leave a legacy like them one day?

Normani: Most definitely.

Lauren: I think we low key have. We’ve made an impressionable mark as far as girl groups go in the industry. I’m proud of us.

Ally: It’s cool because they inspired our looks for the shoot. We did a 90s throwback vibe and we channeled their wardrobe and hairstyles. It was super fun. They really do shape us.

Dinah: I think musically they inspire us but also on a human level. I think when you’re in a group, people expect you to all be the same. Just looking around at each other, it has helped me discover that we’re all uniquely different from each other for a good reason, because there would be no growth for me. As I’m learning about each other girl, it’s helping me learn about myself. We all have our weaknesses, we all have our strengths, but together we all make it up.

Which of you has the most out-there personal style?

Ally: I like sometimes to dress crazy…well I don’t think it’s crazy [laughs]. I like to have more fun with my fashion. Obviously if everyone is wearing more “chill chic” outfits then I’ll have to go in that lane, but…

Lauren: You love being extra.

Ally: Not extra, but I love to play! I don’t like feeling plain, I like a little sugar on top.

With so many pics of you in the spotlight, how do you keep a healthy mindset?

Normani: I feel like in a way you’re forced to, just because there’s always gonna be bad photos of you.

Lauren: Yep, you’re forced to, but you never get over people taking bad pictures of you from disgusting angles! I’ll never get over it. I get so angry every time I go on the Internet, I’m like, “Why! You know I look bad here! Why did you post it!?” I hate it.

Dinah: Sometimes they know we don’t look cute, they do it just to show, “look at this unflattering photo…”

Ally: One time I literally looked like an egg. And I had to choose to laugh about it. Sometimes you obviously freak out, but it’s out there. You cry and then you laugh.

Lauren: You cry and then you laugh again.

[jawnjendes]

i could use something good | shawn mendes

university au, shawn x goth gf

AN: this is their First Date and its nearly 4k words and i gave myself emotions so and a bitch is TIREDT so TAKE THIS BLEASE n let me know what u think pls i need it

!!!!also!!!! should i give this bitch a name? should the goth gf be called something other than goth gf??? let me know if u have any name suggestions!

!!!ANOTHER also!!!! i made a playlist!!! its a fuck ton of whiplash! i spent 3 days on it!! enjoy!!

masterlist | series playlist

“If I didn’t know you,” said Stella, who was at my bedroom doorway, “I wouldn’t think you were going on a date with a guy like Shawn Mendes.”

She wasn’t wrong. I was decked out in a long black button up, ripped black jeans, and black Vans. However, I had the decency to keep my makeup colorful. Who doesn’t love bright red eyeshadow, thick wings, and a nude lip? Besides, all black clothing and bright eyeshadow was all I had for the moment. These days, I barely found time for washing my clothes or makeup brushes. My glamorous office job and homework was getting quite demanding. I was surprised I found time to see Shawn on the weekend.

I say that as if I wasn’t putting off psych homework. The last time I did this was for some fuckboy who didn’t care about my grades… or me at all. How did I know it was going to be different this time? Usually, I can tell when someone wants to hook up and leave it at that, but I have spoken to Shawn as many times as I can count on one hand, and I couldn’t detect any of that. Must be a good actor. Maybe he’s done this before.

“Maybe I’ve lost my mind,” I said, more to myself than to Stella.

She heard and responded anyway. “Losing your mind is staying in bed for a whole twenty four hours. You’re getting back into the swing of things, so even if this date goes bad, the interaction is good for you. This is normal for our age.”

Again, she’s not wrong. My antidepressant prescription was finally refilled, so the fog in my head was starting to clear up. It was just way too easy to slip back into isolation. My self destructive tendencies were just being done out of habit at this point.

“When was the last time you went on a date?” Stella asked.

I blew out a sigh and thought about it as I applied lip gloss over my nude lipstick. I was hardly the type to go on an actual date. “Shit, I don’t know. Before college, I think.”

“So you were seventeen?”

“No! I started college late. I was probably eighteen, almost nineteen.”

“That’s still about three years.”

“Well, chances are neither of us are really taking this thing seriously,” I said, putting my lip products into my purse. “He didn’t ask me on a date. He just wanted to hang out.”

Stella clicked her tongue and folded her arms. “So you’re just gonna go get laid?”

“No. I’m past that part of life.”

“So it’s a date.”

“No.”

She was more confused than I was by the time Shawn had texted me. He asked to come up to the dorm, so I gave him the floor and number. According to Stella, I was either definitely getting laid or my man friend was a real gentlemen. I wasn’t sure which one I was more nervous about.

“Should I answer the door?” Stella asked, bouncing on her feet. “So I can tell him that you’re almost ready, and then you can make a dramatic entrance, and he’ll be like ‘you look… wow.’ Y’know the way guys do!” She said all of that very fast.

“And then I say ‘you don’t look too bad yourself,’” I said, amused. “What universe is this?”

We both laughed, but then we were cut off by a knock on the door. Stella looked at my with a grin so wide her dimples came out. I tried to match her enthusiasm.

“I’ll get it,” she said, turning on her heel towards the front door.

“No, I will!” I snapped, suddenly frantic. I pushed past her to answer the door.

“No, you have to make your dramatic entrance!”

“I don’t have to!”

We bickered as we got closer to the door. Mind you, it was five steps from my bedroom. I pretty much slapped Stella’s hand out of the way as she reached for the doorknob, and I knocked her out of the way with my hip. At the last second, she stood behind the door as I opened it.

I smiled wide at Shawn, who had been waiting for thirty seconds too long. He was in a white button up, black skinny jeans, and black boots. Tall and handsome as ever. It’s always the handsome ones that’ll get you. What are the chances I was falling into another fuckboy trap?

He returned the smile, probably acting like he didn’t hear me tackle my roommate. “Hey, you ready?”

I nodded like a lovesick puppy. This was quite unlike me, if you don’t think about the times I was easily swayed by various guys who gave zero fucks. Oh god, am I easy?

Stella was hopping like a bunny from behind the door. I shot her one last glance before stepping out of the dorm and into the hallway.

No one was around to see or feel the awkward air of me walking next to Shawn. It was obvious that we were… into each other? But it was still, for lack of a better phrase, the first date and I was unbelievably aware of that. Just by appearance alone, Shawn and I didn’t look like people who would typically hang out with each other.

Shawn walked with a type of confidence I could only dream to have. People noticed him, people wanted to be friends with him. There was just something about him that draws you in, and it drew in my broody ass.

I walked with my shoulders hunched, my hood up, and my head down. I tried not to be noticed, and I was pretty sure it worked. Strangers in class who tried to talk to me were always caught off guard by my black lipstick and dark eyeliner, like it’s never been done before. I was a little unapproachable, and I didn’t intend for it to be that way.

“So before we go,” Shawn said, “you got any allergies or dietary restrictions I should know about? ‘Cause we’re gonna go eat.”

Okay… doesn’t seem like a hook up situation. I was also surprised he had the decency to ask. The only reason why my face felt hot was because I actually had an answer.

“You ready? ‘Cause it’s a decent sized list,” I told him. Then, I named all the restaurants I couldn’t eat at because I’ve gotten sick from the food. “Also, I can’t have anything spicy, or anything that’s super processed and dripping with grease.”

I didn’t love explaining this to people, but it was necessary. I prefer not being sick, especially on a date. It’s a long story.

“Alright, coffee it is,” Shawn concluded.

We ended up going to the place he and Camila performed at a couple weeks ago. It was much less crowded in broad daylight. Shawn ordered some passion fruit whatever, and I stuck with jasmine tea. I insisted on paying for myself, but nah, I was invited here or whatever.

“Where do you wanna sit?” Shawn asked when we had our drinks.

I wordlessly went for the table at the far corner of the shop. The place was quite small, so we weren’t exactly away from everyone else. From here, I could see the entrance, and the string of customers that would come and go. The bathrooms were also right next to where we sat, so I could make an impromptu escape if needed.

“Away from the sun, eh?” Shawn joked. “As expected.”

If this date was going to consist of goth jokes I swear-

“So how’s your day goin’?” I asked, keeping a smile on my face.

“The usual. I worked, went to class.”

I nodded, playing with my steaming to-go cup. “You said you work at a flower shop, right? What’s that like?”

“Oh, I love it.” Shawn sat up in his seat. “I love the different types of flowers we got. There’s one, a chaenomeles, or a flowering quince - beautiful, one of my favorites.”

The way he talked about being surrounded by pretty plants four times a week was entrancing. He was really into it. He went into detail about arranging flowers down to the vase they went in. He knew his stuff and he loved every bit of it. Damn it, he’s passionate. I like passion in a guy. Damn it.

“So you do the arrangements and you deliver them?” I asked. Listen, I wanted to know more about him and for him to know less about me.

“Pretty much. Although, I’ve been delivering to a lot of funerals lately. That’s probably more your neck of the woods, right?” He smirked.

I scoffed. “Oh yeah, the girl who wears all black must love attending funerals, huh?” I sat back and sipped my tea. “It’s quite the opposite actually, even though I’ll admit, I look like I love death and dying.”

Shawn tilted his head, curious. “Is that not what being a goth is?”

“I wouldn’t know ‘cause I’m not a goth.” A smile almost grew on my face, but I stayed neutral.

Silence fell between us, and I looked down at my cup. I could feel Shawn’s brown eyes on me, and one glance at his face showed me a charming, boyish smile. He knew I knew something, and he was quietly coaxing it out of me.

And it worked.

“Okay, fine!” I said, scooting forward and placing my elbows on the table. “Goths are merely aware of how short and fragile human life is. We-” I cleared my throat, “They acknowledge and accept the fact that we’re all going to mcfreaking die one day.”

Shawn nodded. “Okay, I see. So they’re not afraid of dying?”

“Depends on the person,” I replied. “They’re incredibly aware of the dark side of things - obviously. But they know of the light too. Light and dark, life and death. But anyone can have that mindset, really. So I would say being goth is finding beauty in the dark.”

“So what makes you not one of them?”

I thought for a moment. Yeah, I was fascinated by things that deviated the mainstream. I thought about death more than I’d like to admit. I wore skulls and black lace and dark makeup, but that shouldn’t be a reason to put me in a box. I knew I wasn’t going to stay like this forever. I just never labeled myself as what others labeled me as.

“I forgot where the beauty was,” I finally answered.

That made Shawn smile. He finally got a sliver of what I just might come with. He didn’t say anything either, he just sank into the moment, and it felt like he wanted me to be there with him.

My eyes went around the coffee shop, trying to find a way to change the topic. More people were starting to enter the vicinity. It was getting less chill and more hectic. Then I looked at the table top. We both had our hands around our cups. I found Shawn’s bird tattoo on his hand, something that made him just a little more attractive.

“So what does your tattoo mean?” I asked.

His response had me floored. “Which one? I’ve got five of them.”

Damn it.

“I guess all of them,” I replied, a smile creeping up on my face.

All five of his tattoos were special and deep. Each one gave me more reasons to not ghost him after this was over. Shawn really loved this city. He really loved his family. He loved his mother so much.

“You really love music, huh?” I mused, looking at the beautiful guitar tattoo on his forearm.

“More than anything,” he replied.

“More than flowers?”

“A hundred percent. Playing music is all I want to do for the rest of my life.”

Tell me why that made me genuinely smile. Tell me why that was so goddamn attractive.

I asked him what his favorite songs were to play, and he had a list of sweet love songs I had listened to at a different point in time. He loved writing songs about love, and he revealed he hasn’t been in a proper serious relationship before. Neither had I. Shawn was a year younger than me, so his reasoning was from just that, being young.

Part of me wished that was also my reason.

After talking to Shawn for over an hour, we fell into a silence much less awkward than when we were walking out of my dorm building. I was stuck wondering how a soft, sunshine-y boy like him could find interest in a stone cold storm like me. I wondered, but I didn’t want to tap out just yet.

Once the coffee shop was too crowded, we went out to the street. This part of downtown was still unfamiliar, but I didn’t mind this time. I was talking to a cute boy. A soft boy. This wasn’t a normal occurrence for me.

“What are you thinking about?” Shawn asked me as we strolled down the street.

I was staring at the ground. I really didn’t know what to say. We spent the last hour sharing our thoughts and whatnot, why does he need more? I merely shrugged.

“Alright, well I have another question,” he said. “What made you agree to this date?”

Oh fuck it is date.

“I don’t know,” I said honestly. “But after spending some time with you, I can say… you’re… charming? And, kind?” I chuckled. “I don’t really talk about things like that so explicitly.”

He looked at me for a second. “Okay, well I do. I asked Stella about you after I saw you at my set. All I’ve wanted to do is to get to know you. You’re just really cool, and really mysterious. It’s kinda drawing me in.”

This had to be a trap somehow. Shawn couldn’t possibly have genuine interest in me. He was all softness and joy, and I was all stormy and bitter. This couldn’t be real.

“I… awesome,” I mumbled, trying to hide my giddiness. Yeah, I was in disbelief, but how often is a guy like that so upfront about his feelings? That is, if he wasn’t lying about any of this.

“You haven’t told me enough about you, honey,” he said.

I glanced at him, placing my hands in my sweater pockets. So he noticed my questioning. “Well, you kinda got it figured out. I’m a girl who likes wearing black.”

“That’s it, eh? Come on, don’t be shy.”

Shyness wasn’t what I would have called it.

“What do you wanna know?” I asked sheepishly.

“Hmm… something crazy that’s happened to you.”

Honestly, it’s just as bad as the word, “everything.” But at least I had something to think about. The craziest thing I did was move countries at the age of nineteen, but it was only crazy in the eyes of my relatives, which was a lot of people. Does that count?

“I got my wisdom teeth out when I was seventeen,” I said casually. “That’s about as crazy as I get. When I was hopped up on drugs, I was telling my mom a tale of a chosen hero who on adventures all over the kingdom.”

Shawn chuckled. “Really?”

“Yeah. My mom recorded it, because she got really into it. She thought I was gonna be the next JK Rowling or something. But when I watched it back, I realized I was just talking about the Legend of Zelda series.”

“Insane. You’re insane.”

We walked a lap around the block, talking about nothing, and then we got back to Shawn’s car. I felt a thrill in my bones I couldn’t explain. I was trying to keep a cheesy grin off my face. I had to keep up my composed exterior.

“So have you been having fun?” Shawn asked when we were inside the vehicle.

“Definitely,” I replied simply.

He looked at me with a smile, and then he was pressing buttons on the radio. “Connect your phone. I wanna hear what you’re listening to.”

I quickly opened the Spotify app and changed the song I was last listening to. Why? It was one of Shawn’s songs. It was too soon for him to know that I was growing fond of his music. Instead, I chose a fairly popular Halsey song, and it played on the speakers.

“Oh, nice,” Shawn said, and he was singing along in seconds.

It got less nice as I listened to the lyrics. This song reminded me of a harder time. That’s probably why I didn’t listen to it for so long.

“You know I’m the one who put you up there

I don’t know why”

Cool way to finish a first date.

I stared out the window and stayed quiet, letting this dumb song swallow me whole. Flashbacks hit me before I could try to stop them. Backseat of my car. Weeks of silence. Feelings like you’re underwater. It made my insides go cold.

“You really get into it, eh?” Shawn asked halfway through the song.

The sound of his voice startled me, but I didn’t jump. I blinked a few times, coming back to present day. I’m in another man’s car. We’re in a different time period.

“Yeah,” I said. “A good song can alter my mood so quickly, I wonder if it’s normal.”

“Oh, I know the feeling. But I also think it has to do with the memories associated with the song.”

Once Halsey finished her song, a slow rock tune played. It was far less triggering, and it had a mile long title.

“She’s the Prettiest Girl at the Party and She Can Prove It with a Solid Right Hook,” I read off my phone. “That’s a banger.”

The following conversation about music helped ground me again. I knew Shawn was passionate about it, but music is the real love of his life. He was looking at the road as he drove, but he had a sparkle in his eyes that shone through the dark. Sometimes he was the flower delivery guy and the singer at a wedding. Sometimes he was the guy who played guitar at a house party.

Shawn was that guy.

We listened to several more of my favorite songs, most of which were symphonic metal. Some of them were lyrically dark, the type that compelled people to do that head tilt and ask “are you okay?” in that voice. Shawn just asked if I wanted to rethink not calling myself a goth, to which I played a Little Mix song to put that shit to rest.

“Oh, Woman Like Me?” he said, surprised. “Didn’t see that one coming.”

“There are many sides of me, my dear,” I told him. We were getting closer to campus, which meant the date was almost over. “You’ve only seen one.”

“Hopefully you’ll let me see more.” He pulled into the parking lot and stopped in an empty space in front of the main building. “So what level am I on now?”

I was shocked he remembered that. But if we’re being real here…

“Two.”

He chuckled. “Two, eh?”

“Yup.”

He hummed. He was looking at me again, and now I was looking at him. His eyes were still sparkling in that stupid cute way, and it was getting me weak.

“This might be the first time you’ve made direct eye contact with me,” he said softly.

“It’s because you’re cute and it confuses me,” I admitted, maintaining the eye contact. There, boy, another little sliver of my feelings.

That stupid charming smile appeared on Shawn’s stupid cute face. He quirked his eyebrows once and licked his lips. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from his mouth… This is bad.

“Well, you’re beautiful and it doesn’t confuse me at all,” he said, his voice getting low. You know, that voice that tells you something is going to happen. “In fact, it’s made things more clear.”

I felt myself getting even weaker. My heart was pounding, not just in my chest, but in my ears and my legs and the bottom of my feet. My stomach was turning over in a way that I wasn’t used to. My body was gravitating towards Shawn before my brain could process it.

“I really like your eyeshadow,” he said softly, doing the same motion.

“Thanks,” I breathed out.

Our faces were an inch apart. I got an intoxicating whiff of his cologne. I was teetering on the edge of just diving headfirst, but I had to be strong.

“I don’t kiss on the first date.”

We stayed in that position for a second. Shawn was the one to lean back first.

“Okay, that’s okay. I understand,” he said. He wasn’t smiling anymore.

It was easy to tell my rejection got to him. I didn’t want to leave knowing he was disappointed. I didn’t want him to think that I didn’t like him. I had been more aloof than I’d like to admit on this entire date, so maybe he was getting the wrong idea.

“So we should go on another date,” I told him, touching his arm, “and maybe I’ll kiss you then.” I smiled hopefully.

That was what he needed to perk up again. “Yeah, definitely. I’m looking forward to it.”

I nodded. “Okay. Alright. I’ll text you, or something. I’m gonna awkwardly leave now.”

He chuckled. “Alright. Goodnight.”

“Night.”

I had my purse and my phone on me, and I placed my hand on the door handle. But I stayed in that position for a minute. It was long enough to be weird. Was I really going to leave knowing that we really wanted to kiss each other?

“Ah, fuck it,” I said with a shrug, and then I was turning back to Shawn.

I would have hoisted myself over the center console if he didn’t meet me halfway. Shawn leaned in as quickly as I did, and his lips were pressing onto mine. It was much softer than I had anticipated, and I only realized it when Shawn placed a hand on the side of my face, gently cupping my chin.

My hand went around his wrist as we gently broke apart. It was only a split second of breathing time before I pulled him in for another. I softly took his bottom lip into my mouth, resisting the urge to just pounce on him completely.

Shawn moved his hand to the back of my neck, trying to pull me closer. Tongues and teeth began to clash, and it only made me grab onto his clean button up. Would it be a bad idea to spend some time in the backseat? We were practically leaning over the center console, moving back and forth like one was going to top the other.

But again… I had to be strong.

We broke apart, panting. My fingers stroked his cheek, and his hand found its way into my hair. I felt his quick breathing on my upper lip, and it only made me want to kiss him again.

“I have to go,” I told him.

But he leaned in again, kissing me once more. “Alright.”

“Alright,” I repeated breathlessly. Then I kissed him again, only for both of us to laugh softly.

“So what level am I at now?” Shawn asked with a cheeky grin.

I returned the smile. “Two and a half.”

“Oh, really? I’d say I’m at level four.”

“Nope. Two and a half. But it’s like I said, we’ll go on another date and see what happens.”

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 7th July 2019

I have been cooped up sick for the past week so I am so glad I can have a pretty easy episode of REVIEWING THE CHARTS this week, in fact, I have a really easy week ‘cause nothing really happened. I can pretty much play catch-up and that’s been great. I’ve even been more active on Twitter because of it. Anyway, time for another round of relatively family-friendly lame pop music ramblings.

Top 10

“I Don’t Care” by Ed Sheeran featuring Justin Bieber is still at the top spot for its eighth week and its only competition is the five other Ed Sheeran singles from his No. 6 Collaborations Project. Oversaturation is not a word Ed Sheeran understands, and I’ll get back to that when I talk about his second of three songs in the top ten right now.

“Senorita” by Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello is steady at number-two but Thog don’t caare

We have our highest new entry on the chart this week at number-three, the... third newest Ed Sheeran single from the project and by the time you’re probably reading these, fourth-newest (Seriously, Ed’s ran himself into a corner if he wants that mini-album bomb considering by now he should damn well know UK chart rules). It’s “Beautiful People” featuring Khalid, but we’ll talk about it later. It’s Sheeran’s 40th(!) UK Top 40 hit, and 24th Top 10 (That’s a pretty great ratio), and Khalid’s twelfth UK Top 40 as well as his fifth Top 10 (Slightly less great ratio).

Up a single space from the debut last week is “Crown” by Stormzy at number-four.

Unfortunately, that means he brought Lewis Capaldi’s “Hold Me While You Wait” with him up to number-five.

Oh, hey, it’s Ed Sheeran, I haven’t seen him in two spots. I was starting to worry about him – I mean he might be falling off. Sigh, “Cross Me” featuring Chance the Rapper and PNB Rock is down two spaces to number-six. To be fair, I like this song.

“Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X featuring Billy Ray Cyrus is surprisingly pretty stagnant at number-seven.

Mabel’s “Mad Love” is of course up five spaces to number-eight, and looking like a pretty promising Summer hit, as well as being her third UK Top 10.

“Wish You Well” by Sigala featuring Becky Hill is sadly up three spots to number-nine. It’s Sigala’s seventh UK Top 10 and Hill’s third (second as a credited artist).

Finally, we have the unfortunate rebound for “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi up four spaces back to #10.

Climbers

It’s not all bad though, my favourite song on the chart right now, “Ladbroke Grove” by AJ Tracey, meets the top 20 at #16, up five from last week, becoming his fourth Top 20 hit. Elsewhere on the chart, “Thiago Silva” with Dave has debuted at #56 despite being three years old because of a crazed fan at Glastonbury rapping the words (near-)perfectly, but that’s not in the top 40, so Alex’s 15 minutes of fame won’t get covered here. Dominic Fike also gets his first top 20 with “3 Nights” up six spots to #20, which is an incredible song too. “Strike a Pose” by Young T & Bugsey and Aitch is up five to #22 and “Summer Days” by Martin Garrix, Macklemore and Patrick Stump of Fall Out Boy is also venturing up the charts, specifically seven spots, at #26. “Find U Again” by Mark Ronson featuring Camila Cabello is up six to #31 off the debut and “Location” by Dave featuring Burna Boy has a chance at a second wind up five to #34. Wow, these are all great songs. Sure, there’s nothing promising in the new arrivals really, and we can safely ignore “Mother’s Daughter” by Miley Cyrus getting a video push up seven placements to #33, but this Summer has some pretty great hits so far and I’m glad it does because otherwise my end-of-year lists would be dry as hell.

Fallers

Most of these fallers this week are also pretty bad songs so it seems to me that the rubbish we kept in Spring is slowly being pushed out finally, as well as some unfortunate losses and songs that debuted high but collapsed afterwards. That last category includes songs like “You Need to Calm Down” by Taylor Swift down five to #15, “Bounce Back” by Little Mix down eight to #25 and “Mocking It” by JAY1 down eight to #27 off the debut despite an EP release. “Easier” by 5 Seconds of Summer stops wasting everyone’s time with its sloppy Nine Inch Nails sample down six to #37. Stormzy’s streaming cuts have finally cut the power of “Vossi Bop”, however, which is a great song, down a whopping 11 spaces, but thankfully only to #14, and the pretty good “Kilos” by Bugzy Malone featuring Aitch is down 10 off of the disproportionally high debut considering both artists’ current popularity last week to #30.

Dropouts & Returning Entries

My only response to this first drop-out is ferocious laughter, as Taylor Swift’s “ME!” featuring Panic! at the Disco has dropped out from #30 after a mere nine weeks on the chart and never hitting #1 or even #2, with a flailing single barely on the charts to save her album release from completely going under. In terms of other drop-outs, there really aren’t any to speak of, except more ferocious laughter, as “MEGATRON” by Nicki Minaj drops out from #34, which was its DEBUT. This means it’s below both “Shotgun” by George Ezra (A song that’s been in the top 75 for 67 weeks), “Thiago Silva” and freakin’ “Mr. Brightside” by the Killers (Which also re-entered outside of the top 40 because of Glastonbury)! Otherwise, we have some drop outs for UK hip-hop, as “Mr Sheeen” by Russ splash and Digga D is out from the debut at #28, and “Shine Girl” by MoStack featuring Stormzy is out from #36. They’re both not particularly great songs, but they had some promise.

We have one returning entry for once, which is “Giant” by Calvin Harris and Rag’n’Bone Man to #40 after it dropped out from that exact space two weeks ago. Sure.

NEW ARRIVALS

#36 – “Higher Love” – Kygo and Whitney Houston

Produced by Kygo and Narada Michael Walden – Peaked at #2 in Norway and #63 in the US

So, Whitney Houston was an incredible singer and sadly passed away at age 48 in February 2012, after a decades-long career being wrapped up in personal struggles that soon overshadowed her music, especially her marriage with Bobby Brown, cocaine usage, but still eleven Hot 100 number-ones to her name, including some of the most iconic hit songs of all time such as “I Will Always Love You”, and the novelty of being one of, if not the, first African-American female singer to appear on MTV. You all know that. Posthumous releases have been few and far between, mostly consisting of cash-grab compilation albums, reissues and box sets, but there have been four posthumous releases as singles before this, most of which are just from a movie she starred in before she died, including duets with Jordin Sparks and... R. Kelly. Huh. None of them charted, then in 2016, some Malaysian dude sampled her in a cover of a mid-1960s progressive rock song... and that leads to this. I feel I should clarify that this is a Steve Winwood cover (Mostly because he and his co-writer are getting all of the royalties off of this, not even Kygo is credited as a songwriter), since this was his first #1, featuring (uncredited) vocals from Chaka Khan, from 1986, but then Whitney Houston covered it in 1990 for the deluxe Japanese version of her third album (Which explains the Walden guy’s production credit). Somehow, Kygo found the isolated vocals for this deluxe Japanese bonus track (We needed that dude on the Clockman search, I swear – or maybe he just has trunkloads of money) and made it a tropical house song, and it’s actually pretty good.

This is Houston’s 32nd(!) UK Top 40 hit and Kygo’s eighth, and it has no right to be this good. You’d think Whitney wouldn’t be putting this much effort into a Japanese bonus track, but her vocals don’t sound strained or tired here, they’re just as beautiful as her biggest hits, you’d think she was planning for a single release. The lyrical content isn’t anything special but with the grandiosity of the piano and trumpets that build up to a relaxed vocaloid drop that seems anti-climactic until it hits you again with a much more epic drop, you can really feel how desperate Whitney is in the lyrics, even when mangled to hell and back in the vocal fragments. I have nothing to talk about with this song really, and it may be a tad overlong for my taste, but this is decent, especially considering Kygo’s recent efforts and this being a tropical house remix of a Steve Winwood cover that was released exclusively to Japan in 1990 – you wouldn’t expect quality out of this, let alone choir vocals in the second drop that really make the song feel pretty religious for... no reason, but I guess Winwood’s song was always up for interpretation and he must have given this the thumbs-up at the time. The dude’s never going to complain about free royalties from some EDM DJ, he didn’t back in 2004 when Eric Prydz did it.. which, by the way, had a video that even the Prime Minister at the time admitted to being aroused to—okay, why is Steve Winwood the person who I found the most interesting here? It’s a good song, let’s leave it at that before I go on an essay-length ramble about Steve Winwood, Tony Blair and Japanese Whitney Houston songs.

#29 – “Don’t Check on Me” – Chris Brown featuring Justin Bieber and Ink

Produced by Sheldon Ferguson – Peaked at #13 in New Zealand and #67 in the US

Alright, so, yeah, I’ve used all of my energy up for that first song because I have nothing to talk about for this one or the song afterwards. It’s Brown’s 36th Top 40 hit here in the UK, which is about 35 too many (Yeah, I liked his last one, “No Guidance” featuring Drake, and I’m not exactly proud to say that). It’s Bieber’s 45th (Holy moly) and this Ink woman’s first, mostly because she has never released solo material and doesn’t have a Wikipedia page. Ink sounds good on the song, but Bieber’s boring as he always is and Brown’s vocals are incredibly overproduced, especially for this tone of song. In fact, I’m not going to go in any more depth than I need to, and just leave you with this. This song is a stripped-down acoustic ballad fronted by Chris Brown. That’s all you need to know.

#3 – “Beautiful People” – Ed Sheeran featuring Khalid

Produced by Ed Sheeran, Max Martin, Shellback, Fred Gibson and Alex Gibson (Did this song really need this many producers?) – Peaked at #2 in Ireland and Slovakia, and #26 in the US

I always feel like the highest debuts each week are the ones I have the least to say about, but maybe that’s because I’ve heard discourse about them all week and I don’t care for them enough to go on about how the new Taylor Swift song misses the point of Pride Month or how Chris Brown is an abuser who made up with Drake after a year-long fued that ended anti-climactically, or how Lewis Capaldi makes me want to eat Kermit the Frog’s insides. This song I’ve seen little to no discourse on however, and that’s pretty telling when all is considered, considering these guys are the two biggest male singer-songwriters out right now, but I think maybe that’s because the song has little to no discourse to be provoked from it. I mean, the lyrical content is interesting, mostly because it’s about how Sheeran and Khalid don’t want to become have their perspective on life clouded by the money and fame... which is very convenient for these guys since that’s their whole appeal – they’re down-to-earth lads who sing over a couple guitar&B instrumentals despite being some of the richest entertainers on Earth, and while nothing can really tell me otherwise that these guys are genuine, I can’t help but to think the lyrics are less of a genuine message and more just fitting in line with the public appearances they’ve established for themselves over the past decade. It doesn’t help that the overproduced instrumental is stodgy and cluttered with nasal vocal samples over some fake handclaps, bumping 808s and... chanting vocals? Also, I’m pretty sure that Fred Gibson guy snuck his “Fred again” tag into this song as well, during a really janky part in the first verse? That means there are two Ed Sheeran songs with a producer tag. Huh, at least this one doesn’t have a PNB Rock verse. The hook is catchy but it breaks momentum with the post-chorus chanting that’s just dumb as hell, and I’m pretty underwhelmed with Khalid in comparison to Ed here, where it would usually be a complete wash, but I’m pretty sure that’s because Khalid doesn’t care enough about perpetuating Ed Sheeran’s image of “Haha, I don’t fit in with the current pop scene of flashy clothes and extravagant music videos!” First of all, that isn’t the current pop scene at all, it was in 2013 when Ed came on the scene but that has switched entirely, mostly to his benefit, and second of all, I’m sure Khalid has no issue at all with wearing a suit to a couple awards shows. He’s barely in his 20s for goodness’ sake.

EDIT: “I Don’t Care” does not have the “Fred again” tag. “Cross Me” still does, but I’m just glad Fred Gibson hasn’t put his claws on everything he touches.

Conclusion

What a shoddy week. Uh, Best of the Week goes to Kygo and Whitney Houston for “Higher Love” and while “Don’t Check on Me” isn’t really worthy of my commentary, I honestly think “Beautiful People” annoys me more, so sadly I’ll have to give Worst of the Week to Ed Sheeran and Khalid. Follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank for more pop music ramblings and I’ll see you next week!

[5hfanfiction]

The Party - Chapter 11

Chapter 11

**Trigger Warning: Drug References**

“So where do you think she is?” Camila was growing increasingly agitated with each step.

“She’ll probably be in her bedroom. The only problem is, I don’t actually know where that is.”

Camila stopped and spun around with shock plastered over her face. “You’re her best-friend and you don’t even know where her bedroom is?!”

Normani shrugged dejectedly. “Nobody does. All I know is that it is hidden away and completely private.”

“But she told me!” Camila cried incredulously.

Camila swore that Normani’s jaw hit the floor and eyes bulged out like something out of ‘the Mask’. “You know where her room is?” Camila wasn’t even sure whether Normani was asking her or asking herself.

“Ah, yeah…” Camila scratched at the side of her neck awkwardly. “She told me I could use her ensuite. I honestly thought it was nothing at the time…”

“Like it was nothing…” Normani sighed wearily. “Lauren will always be a mystery to me.” She shook her head disparagingly. “Let’s just keep going.”

“Wait!” Camila called out randomly before they could continue creating a path through the numerous bodies. “I need to know… what’s going on? What we are faced with?”

Ally shook her head. “You don’t want to know. It’s better not to.”

“But I need to. What could be so bad?”

“Ally’s right, but I won’t hide it from you if you are sure.” Normani’s eyes bore into Camila’s with a frightening level of intensity.

“I’m sure,” Camila responded with as much conviction as possible, attempting to meet Normani’s steely gaze with her own.

“Let’s keep moving and I’ll explain it to you.”

Camila nodded and she led the way, trying to keep Normani at close proximity.

“Lauren has never been an open person. She doesn’t even allow herself to feel, let alone allow others to witness it. And I have known her since she was 7.

"It may seem hard to believe, but this all started over something as innocent and mundane as a crush. The problem for her, was that this crush wasn’t on a boy. But when she confessed her feelings to her mum… Let’s just say her parents were not  tolerant. They sent her to shrink after shrink and tried to force her to be 'normal’ – and we all know how that always ends!”

She rolled her eyes before continuing, “Anyway. So she spent a ridiculous amount of time trying to convince herself and her parents that she was 'normal’. As the pressure gradually crushed her, she turned away from her friends and got in with the wrong crowd. Parties, drugs, gangs, one-night stands…you name it.

"She was addicted to coke and was constantly high. You don’t even want to know what it was like when she rang; screaming about all kinds of crazy while tripping on hallucinogens. The amount of times she had a bad trip.” Normani shook her head, closing her eyes forcefully, as if to force the memories away. “But I will never forget that night when she overdosed… I found her lifeless clammy body and had to rush her to hospital. The worst part of all was that someone had raped her while she was practically catatonic. It was a nightmare, but that wasn’t…unusual for her.

"She was in a coma for 4 months after that. Neither of her parents could even be bothered to visit her once while she was there. We had to just pray that they wouldn’t tell the hospital to pull the plug; I honestly doubt that they would have thought twice about it. The doctors were convinced she would be brain dead when she awoke, if she awoke. But then she did, and it felt like a miracle come to life.

"She was doing great for a while, but she was stubborn and refused to seek help, despite me suggesting psychologist after psychologist to her. She insisted that she knew how to cope, all while her nightmares were getting increasing bad again. So she began self-medicating and before anyone even knew what was happening, she was addicted to cocaine once again. She had finally accepted herself to a degree and was no longer letting guys use her, but she was completely broken. She believed that no one could ever love her after everything, so it would be a new girl every night.

"Ally, Alexa and I confronted Lauren about it. She was insufferable whenever we saw her – which was rare in any case – and whenever she bothered to show up to her college lectures and classes she would become so disruptive that she was permanently banned until she got her act together. The fact that she couldn’t even focus throughout our intervention proved that she really needed help.

"We had been doing research and had selected a rehab centre and contacted her parents, claiming that Lauren needed the money for a trip to Hawaii with us. They never give two shits, as long as Lauren was 'keeping up appearances’.” Normani rolled her eyes, her indignation evident in her expression. “Anyway, so within three days, we had organised the details and had Lauren on her way.”

**Flashback**

17 months prior

Normani couldn’t help but focus her eyes every minute or so on the rearview mirror. The sliver of reflective glass reminded Normani’s guilty conscious of why they were doing this all in the first place. If the object of her attention had any cognition at all, she would have been meeting with her best friend’s paranoic glances, but alas she remained unfocused and distracted.

Normani could barely recognise the girl sitting in the backseat beside Alexa. Her usually healthy, pale complexion was a sickly imitation of what it had once been. She appeared slender and fragile, her skin hanging off of her as if it no longer wished to be subjected to such abuse. Frantic pits of dilated black darted every few seconds, the laughter and life that once filled those eyes now leaving a senseless void in their place.

Her sockets were slightly sunken into her visible skull and her deep bags conveyed the endless hours of insomnia to match with the dull appearance of her slim irises. Her eyes were no longer the thrilling beacons of magnetism that had sent men and women to their knees, but now commanded pity and condemnation from those around her. When semi-sober, the once confident, albiet arrogant, air that the girl had once carried had dissipated into a poor emulation; her posture more akin to the 'Hunchback of Notre Dame’.

And worst of all was the relentless fidgeting. She could not remain still for any more than a half-second, constantly wiggling, moving and pacing. It would drive anyone crazy, in Normani’s opinion. Her agitation would lead to her itching and scratching obsessively at her skin and chewing at her fingernails. When she hadn’t taken a hit in anything over an hour she would break out into a sweat and her muscles would spasm, causing her body to tremor.

Normani observed Lauren turn to Alexa to mutter something. Alexa shook her head in response and grasped Lauren’s hand responding with soothing words and movements. Still watching, she noticed Lauren nod imperceptibly as her left leg bounced in it’s place. Her eyes darted around again, growing increasingly impatient. Then her eyes managed to lock onto Normani’s dark ones, attempting to staring her down.

“Mani, I changed my mind. I don’t want to go any more,” her husky voice shaking in distress. Her eyes pleaded with Normani’s, but the taller girl remained resolute and uncompromising.

“Too late Laur, you’ll be fine.”

“No. I don’t want to go! I can’t do this. Turn around!” she demanded now focusing on our driver, Ally. She had yanked her hand from Alexa’s grip and now hand both hands curled into fists. Her gaze moved from each person radically fast and a sense of dread filled Normani’s gut. “STOP THIS FUCKING CAR!!!"she suddenly screamed, as Alexa struggled to restrain her as she launched towards Ally.

"Fuck Lauren, CALM DOWN!” Alexa shouted back at her but it was in vain. The two girls tussled in the back as if they were two siblings embroiled in a silly fight. Normani watched on helplessly, glancing over at Ally for a moment to gather how she was fairing.

Normani refocused her attention on their driver. Ally’s eyes remained glued to the road with a white-knuckled grip strangling the steering wheel in an attempt to block out everything that was happening. She felt the intensity of the other girl’s gaze and eventually decided to meet it. “We’re almost there,” she mouthed in a whisper before turning back. Normani felt her body relax a little, leading her to realise how truly stressed she had become.

To her immense relief Ally was correct, not even two minutes later and they had arrived. Lauren had seemingly given up, still pinned down by a panting Alexa, who had her caught in an effective arm lock. Lauren was still trying to manipulate the girls into releasing her, every insult and guilt trip she sent them on biting into the thick skin each girl had grown. As soon as the car stilled, Normani was out the door to help Alexa with Lauren. Lauren had entered a drowsy state by the time they removed her from the vehicle, and instantly transformed into a needy puppy.

The four girl’s approached the large building surrounded by trees and doused in sunlight. There was a large glass front, that allowed their eyes access to the reception area. Normani was struck by the colourful and welcoming atmosphere as soon as they breached the entrance. The two receptionists seemed rather friendly, inviting them in to sit on the couches and offering beverages – it almost felt as if they were all visiting a long-lost friend.

“Are you sure this is rehab?” Alexa leaned over and whispered harshly to Normani, who responded with a nod and a shrug.

“Rehab for them rich people,” she responded equally as lowly.

***

They quickly went through all the paperwork as Lauren sleepily admired all the colours before drifting into a restless sleep. Once they completed everything, two male nurses came into reception to inaugurate Lauren into the Sunlight Rehabilitation community.

Lauren was none too happy when she was roused from her short slumber. Her relentless grumbles continued throughout the entire tour, making Normani want to strangle her younger friend. Suffice to say, unlike Lauren, she and the two other girls were impressed. Normani would almost take a vacation here after witnessing the facilities and activities that were offered as a distraction for the addicts. There were two gyms, an Olympic swimming pool and sauna, a tennis court, a salon and several other redeeming features, not to mention the friendly atmosphere and staff. This is what Normani considered a 'pamphlet palace’, a resort that appears exactly as the vacation pamphlet suggests, it even had the relaxed vibe to match.

Other than a few disgruntled patients, most seemed to be doing well in their recovery – more like guests than patients in Normani’s personal opinion – and Normani felt that by leaving Lauren here, she would be in the safest of hands. All that was necessary was one shared glance between Normani and Ally for both to know that this place was seemingly perfect. They had done well in their research.

As they made their way back to reception, Normani noticed Lauren becoming increasingly agitated once again. She felt an uncomfortable knot form in her stomach, already predicting the oncoming onslaught the was about to wreak it’s havoc. Normani swore that it was as soon as they all took their first step back into the foyer area that Lauren finally erupted.

“I may as well be dead for all anyone cares! No one fucking cares about Lauren Jauregui – HA! – what a fucking joke she is!” her eyes were filled with self-contempt and a burning hatred that frightened Normani more than she would like to have admitted.

“Lauren…” Ally started gently.

Lauren’s head snapped in her direction, and Normani was almost glad that it was Ally trapped beneath the gaze of those shocking eyes. Ally flinched as Lauren raged at her, calling her an “timid little sheep” using bleating noises to emphasise her point. She then turned her attention to Alexa, whom she labelled an “inconsiderate traitorous bitch” and finally Normani claiming her to be a “self-righteous money-grabbing whore”. Lauren went on, accusing them all of being “paid off” by her parents to restrict her freedom. Lauren was practically throwing everything they were trying to do for her right back in their faces for the second time that day. It was more than Normani could bear to take.

“STOP IT LAUREN! Please… just stop. We are doing this because we love you. Because we actually care,” she pleaded. But Normani could plead for days and it still wouldn’t have gotten through to the green-eyed mess.

“No! I see right through you, bitch. I fucking knew it!” Lauren snorted contemptuously as Ally shook her head, fighting back her tears. Normani knew there was no getting through to her, and she was aware that as much as they tried it would only do more harm to continue arguing.

“Maybe you’re right Lauren. Who knows? But I think it’s time for Al’s, Lexi and I to leave. We’ve overstayed or welcome by the looks of it.”

Normani observed the flash of panic and fear that crossed Lauren’s features, before settling once again on scorn. “I think maybe you’re right. Don’t fucking bother visiting. There’s the door; go do what everyone seems to do best,” she spat, dismissing them toward the entrance. “Maybe by the next time you bother to "care” I’ll be 10ft underground!“

** End Flashback **

"We left her there in a state, that’s for sure!” Normani let out a bitter chuckle. “She was not happy and wouldn’t let us see her for two whole weeks. Anyway, she ended out staying for two months. She probably only needed one, but as I said, that place was a goddamn palace!

"Since then, she’s been close to clean ever since. She still drinks occasionally, and sometimes she overdoes it with the "Happy Pills” and dope, but overall she’s done well. Until now…“

Camila nodded thoughtfully, her mind absorbing chunks of the information and spinning them around in a tornado like fashion. After all that she had heard, there was one single question that seemed to play on her mind. It was like an insistent mosquito bite that wouldn’t stop itching until the top had been picked. Camila couldn’t understand why this question seemed to remain so persistent in her mind, so she decided not to overthink it and asked. "What ever happened to her crush?”

Camila was momentarily distracted by her surroundings, recognising the same room as before. She remembered the area that Lauren had indicated, and lead the way over there and stopped still waiting for the answer. Normani turned back to look Camila dead in the eyes as she answered, “Oh, Lauren’s still in love with her.”

“So – so she’s still around?”

Normani’s head tilted to the side as she continued to stare Camila down “You could say that,” she answered cryptically. Camila could see something in Normani’s eyes, but her mind couldn’t seem to connect the dots properly.

“Oh. Okay,” Camila’s voice sounded more dejected than she had hoped. At Normani’s words there was a sudden pain that was trying to crush her vulnerable heart. Trying to ignore her thoughts, she avoided Normani’s piercing gaze while her jealous mind battled her reason. Little did she know that by looking away, she missed the hope that sprung into Normani’s eyes.

“Why do you ask?” Normani was now determined to pry an admission from the younger girl now, as she awaited the answer with palpable interest.

“I – uh, don’t know. It doesn’t really matter anyway.” She shrugged as Normani’s brow rose. “And we’re here! Lauren pointed to this wall, so it has to be along here!” Camila remarked suddenly in an attempt to direct the conversation elsewhere.

“If you say so,” she muttered as she turned away to work out where the door was. Now Camila was the one frowning, as her thoughts leaped over each other in a desperate cry for attention. She shook her head in an attempt to rid her mind of the thoughts that cluttered her ability to think rationally.

Her eyes landed in the large Lion King curtain that hung against the wall. She approached it in awe, smiling at the many memories that had been formed between them over that movie. It was without a doubt Lauren’s favourite Disney movie, and had once upon a time been her own.

**Flashback**

14 Years Prior

Camila was so excited that Lauren was coming over today. She had prepared heaps of snacks with her mum, and had built a blanket fort for them to snuggle under. She had the entire night planned out, with a stack of movies sitting ready to go. Her mum had help her choose her outfit and braid her hair, even though she tried to remind Camila that “It’s just Lauren!”

“Exactly!” the excitable girl exclaimed. Her mother only shook her head with a chuckle as Camila squirmed in her seat.

“Mija, you need to sit still if you want me to do your hair!” she laughed.

“But I want to see! I need to look pretty for Lolo, Mama,” she exclaimed with another wiggle.

“You already look gorgeous, mi hija. Trust me and sit still. You’ll be so pretty that even the stars will be jealous!” Camila giggled in response and tried to stay as still as possible.

Minutes later and Sinuhe had Camila staring at her reflection in awe. The young girl’s eyes sparkled and she had the widest grin plastered across her small face. She looked up excitedly to her mother, who had kept her loving gaze focused on her 5-year-old daughter, and said to her mum: “Maybe Lolo will marry me now I’m as pretty as a princess.”

***

Lauren was really special to Camila for a reason that she couldn’t quite comprehend. Lauren was different from all of Camila’s other friends, even Jake, the boy that all of the other girls liked. Camila couldn’t understand why the others didn’t like Lauren the way they liked Jake. Lauren was really pretty, and funny, and nice, and ALL the teachers loved her. But all the girls liked Jake, the one who thought it was cool draw penises on his test papers.

Camila didn’t get it. She couldn’t understand how others didn’t get lost in the kaleidoscope of green, or crave the warmth of her soft embrace. She didn’t know how others resisted laughing at all her funny jokes or smiling at Lauren’s adorable grin.

But no.

All the other kids were scared of her. They called her names behind her back and whispered mean things in one another’s ears. And all Camila wanted was for them to know how beautiful and sweet the green-eyed girl was. She wanted to protect Lauren from the harsh opinions that had been inflicted upon these children by their pretentious parents.

Why couldn’t they all just see Lauren the way Camila saw her?

She remembered how – after Lauren’s first day of school – she had found Lauren crying alone in her room. Lauren had told her to “go away”, but instead she had crawled into Lauren’s bed to cuddle. Lauren, through her tears, had told Camila how all the kids were scared of her and ran away from her eyes. She confessed to the younger girl that some of the kids had branded her a witch, claiming that she was evil sent to punish sinners. Camila had started to cry as well when Lauren showed some bruises of the stones and sticks that some of the kids hurled at her before the teachers intervened. And from that day forward, she made a promise to her neighbour to always be there to protect her Lolo no matter what.

***

A couple of hours later the familiar chime of the doorbell rang through the house. Camila practically squealed and jumped up, running through the house yelling “I’ll get it, I’ll get it!”.

The panting girl flung open the door and squealed “LOLO!!!” as she leaped into the other girl’s arms. “I missed you!” she sung. Her legs wrapped around the taller girl’s waist in a koala hug as her fingers played with Lauren’s hair.

“Camz!” the surprised girl exclaimed, with a slight “Oof!” at the force of the impact. “I missed you too,” she mumbled into Camila’s shoulder as she pulled the smaller girl in tight. Camila loved the feeling of safety that she felt in Lauren’s warm arms, she always felt a welcome sense of comfort that reminded her of home. She loved the fresh vanilla aroma that seemed to emanate from Lauren’s skin, which never failed to make Camila slightly giddy.

Lauren attempted to stumble trhough the doorway with the adorably clinging limpet hanging off of her. Camila finally got the idea and eased up, letting her own feet carry her rather than Lauren’s.

“Hello Mr and Mrs Cabello!” Lauren said, her head lowered slightly hid her shy smile. She waved lamely, the awkwardness evidently covey in her tense movements.

“Oh darling, how many times have we told you to call us by our first names?!” Sinuhe chided, taking three long strides and wrapping the blushing girl in a gentle embrace. “You always look so gorgeous!” the woman exclaimed, allowing space for her husband to hug the girl as well. She winked conspiratorially with her giggling daughter, before her eyes locked onto the open doorway. “And what’s that darling?”

Camila spun around and noticed the top of what looked to be a small bundle sitting out on the step. She turned back to Lauren who was blushing profusely and running a small hand through her dark brown locks. “I – I, uh, got you something, Camz,” she stuttered nervously.

With three pairs of eyes trained on her, she retreated to the doorway and picked up whatever had been left there. Camila was brimming full of unbridled curiosity and snuck forward, almost giving Lauren a heart attack when she spun back around. To hide the immense embarrassment that was quite evident on her face, Lauren thrust a handful of flowers toward Camila. She snatched them up with a gleeful gasp and spun around gaily in excitement.

“They’re – uh – gar-gardeni-yas…” Lauren blurted out with a nervous smile gracing her features. Her inability to pronounce the word gardenia was completely endearing to the witnessing parties, and the symbolism of the particular flower flying over all of their heads. “They’re my fav-our-rite.”

There was an “Aww!” that sounded out from the background, but the two girls were so enamoured with one another that they didn’t even notice.

“They’re really pretty, Lolo!” Camila gushed, her joy almost tangible as she threw her arms around Lauren’s neck. She was still grasping the flowers, as she planted a huge kiss on the flustered girl’s cheek. “Thank you,” she whispered gratefully into Lauren’s ear. Camila felt the older girl shiver at the action, but innocently believed it was the breeze through the open door. “Come on! Movie time!”

Camila led Lauren by the wrist through the house to the adorable set-up that she had planned. She watched as Lauren’s eyes widened and a grin stretched itself across her face. The green-eyed girl turned her gaze upon Camila – her eyes a brilliant green – and she startled Camila by clasping her petite hand in her own and bringing it to her lips.

“After you, Princess Camz,” Lauren announced, threading her fingers between Camila’s and leading her first into the makeshift playhouse. Camila giggled and her stomach fluttered uncontrollably at Lauren’s words, savouring every precious moment they shared.

After grabbing the remote and Lauren settling in beside her, she started the first film. With their hands still intertwined, they almost unconsciously crept closer and closer together. It quickly got to the point where Camila had finally had enough of the distance. She missed the warmth that Lauren’s body provided, and craved the strange tingly feeling that sparked through their touch.

“Cuddles?” she asked innocently, her large brown puppy-like eyes gazing up into Lauren’s tender ones. Lauren just nodded cutely and snuggled into Camila.

***

Eventually the two of them had fallen asleep, a small mass of gangly limbs and quiet snores. Camila eventually drifted back into reality, wriggling comfortably into the random warmth around her. Still barely conscious, her movements had awoken a young, sleepy Lauren. Camila watched in an awed daze as Lauren lazily blinked her eyes open, and gave a cute little yawn.

“Lolo,” she giggled, her hands curiously tracing along Lauren’s face.

“Camz,” she replied, also giggling and toying with Camila’s hair.

“You’re really pretty!”

“You’re even prettier!”

“You’re even prettierer!”

“Well you’re the prettiest!”

“Well you’re even prettier than the prettiestest person in the whole wide world!” Camila exclaimed, her arms widening dramatically for emphasis.

Lauren giggled. “You’re really funny!”

“So are you!” the brown-eyed girl deflected.

Their faces were close now and they were staring deeply into each others’ eyes as a giddy tension built. Lauren broke eye contact first, looking down at Camila’s lips with a furrowed brow and then back up again. Camila could feel a strange soaring sensation rising from within her as they both began to playfully alternate their gaze between eyes and lips while giggling at the synchronisation of their movements.

“Can – can I k-kiss you?” Lauren barely whispered in an uncharacteristically low voice for a 6-year-old. Camila shivered pleasantly, the sensation of the other girl’s breath upon her lips making her chest tighten and her cheeks flush.

“I – I think so,” Camila mumbled, equally as softly.

There were a few golden seconds between their indecision and their action. What they had both assumed would be a brief peck, became slightly more as their young lips moved clumsily in a innocent lip-lock. They both pulled away after a second or two, a mirror of coy embarrassment between them. Camila slowly brought her fingers to her lips wistfully with a blush and wide smile, as Lauren seemed to become agitated.

Before Camila knew what was happening Lauren had jumped up, collapsing the blanket fort and was backing away toward the door.

“I have…gotta… go,” Lauren breathed out. “I will…see you 'round Camilah.” And before Camila could even comprehend, Lauren was gone.

The shocked girl was paralysed, the event replaying through her head to the tempo of Hakuna Matata which was being sung in the background. Her chest felt as though it had been trodden on by elephants and when her eyes grew blurry, her hand found wet tears making their tell-tale marks across her skin. Her princess charming had just abandoned her, leaving her alone with no dragon and no company. Hakuna Matata had never felt ironic until that moment.

And that was the day when Lion King ceased to be her favourite Disney film.

***

Camila was stunned at the recollection of the lost memories. Her parents had always joked about her slight girl-crush on her neighbour, but she had completely forgotten most of her and Lauren’s time together as children. From deep within her heart, she could feel the abandoned feelings stirring up a fuss. Her brain seemed to have short-circuited, flashes of moments set on replay.

She quickly shook herself out of her reverie and tried to recall the reason behind her overwhelming sense of urgency. With a jolt to her vulnerable heart she remembered everything that had just happened and recognised just how much danger Lauren was truly in. She couldn’t really pinpoint what it was exactly that possessed her to search behind the curtain, but she let out an excited squeal at what she had found.

The other girls were quickly drawn to the unusual noise and immediately joined Camila’s excitement. That is, until their apprehension superseded any delight that had momentarily pervaded their minds. Camila’s hand slowly reached for the door handle, insecurity evident by the visible tremors that seemed to possess her hand. The handle was turned and the door sprung open.

Camila tentatively stepped in, staring about as the moonlight drifted though the skylight that would be level with the ground outside. Lauren’s room was filled with drawings, poems, quotes and lyrics, scrawled across the walls and on the neatly tacked on sheets. Her king sized bed sat grandly in the centre, it’s Gothic style matching the rest of the furniture that filled the room. There was a smaller space off to the side that looked like it it was a small library, and there was a guitar sitting idly beside the bed begging to be played.

Camila’s jaw dropped open even further when she looked up to see the night sky in the enormous skylight that existed as the roof to the bedroom and library. She could even make out a couple of the stars that seemed to wink innocently at her. It took her a few moments before she recognised how silent it sounded.

She looked about searchingly, fearing what she already knew was true.

They were wrong. Lauren wasn’t here.

A/N: Stay Beautiful,

Mel <3

Wattpad: @MelT_Me

[5hfanfiction]

Flowers on my doorstep - Chapter 5

Lauren and I sat in the coffee shop for a few more hours talking about both nothing and everything at the same time, which was odd for someone I just met, until she had to go to her next class, sociology I think. So I decided to head back to my room and recuperate from all the socialising. As ridiculous as it sounds I really needed to. Spending any given amount of time with people and talking always drained me of my energy.

“Hey Chancho, why are you so smiley?” Dinah asked as I entered the room looking at a text that had appeared on my phone from Lauren. We had agreed to exchange numbers earlier on and she promised to text, actually she was very insistent upon it.

Lauren(1:29pm): I really liked talking- or stutering a jumbled mess at yio today. It was fun, maybee we can do it agian sometime. Only if you want 2 vo.

“Hmm? No reason.” I spoke walking over to my bed and flopping down on it as I read over her text again. There were a few spelling errors or typos but nothing I couldn’t understand. So I unlocked my phone and thought of a text to send back to the new girl I had just met.

“Right because people walk around smiling at their phones for no apparent reason now.” Dinah spoke sarcastically.

“I’m very passionate about technology, what can I say?” I said monotonously as I focused on typing a reply back to Lauren.

Camila(1:31pm): Sssh! You spoke fine. I enjoyed it too. We can definitely hang again, I’m definitely beginning to like you Lauren Jauregui 😉😉  xxx

I sent the text, immediately regretting the risqué emoji use. “Oh no! ” I sat up quickly.

“What?!” Dinah asked in a surprised panic at my sudden outburst.

“Oh no, oh no, oh no.” I said staring at my phone, regretting the added emoji. Why did I have to put two? This was bad. Why do I have no chill? Dumb Camila. Dumb! I internally slapped myself.

“What? What? What? What?!” Dinah asked coming over to me looking confused.

“Text. The text.” I said throwing my phone on the bed upright so she could see the screen as I pointed at it with a dreaded expression on my face.

“What about it?” She said picking it up my phone unbothered and reading the message as I watched her face for any sign of expression. She showed none. “Is this the flower girl?” Dinah asked.

“Uh hu.” I replied wide eyed.

“So that’s why you were smiling.” She said wiggling her eyebrows and looking all smirky.

“Dinah! Can we focus on the problem at hand?!” I stressed feeling my anxiety rise.

“Which is?” Dinah said growing bored, she certainly wasn’t the patient type.

“The emoji! I shouldn’t have added the fucking emoji!” I flipped, biting my nails, “Especially along with the kisses.”

“Alright, alright. It’s just an emoji calm down. We can fix this.” Dinah said calmly snapping into her serious mode after seeing how dire this situation indeed was. “Mila!!! You added two?!” Dinah freaked.

“I know I’m sorry. I’m such a fuc-” I groaned.

“Shit! Shit! Shit!” Dinah said letting go of the phone scared and letting it fall back onto its place on the bed.

“What?What?What?!What?!” I panicked, scrambling after the phone and scooping it up in my hands desperate to see what had happened.

“She’s typing.” Dinah exclaimed quickly moving to sit next to me and peer over my shoulder anxiously. We both sat their for at least three minutes waiting for Lauren to type out a text.

“Jeez, what’s taking her so long?” Dinah complained anxiously.

“Ssh!!” I hushed her still staring intently at the phone as I waited semi-patiently knowing about Lauren’s difficulties to do simple things like she had explained to me earlier. It was actually really interesting to know about actually. The human brain was really fascinating. Though she hadn’t told me how she had acquired such a dangerous injury. I mean it wasn’t everyday you came across someone with a brain injury. Or maybe we do and it’s just not that obvious like Lauren’s.

So we waited another minute until a reply eventually came through.

Lauren(1:40 pm): K Thank youu. Maybee I’ll cach you latr? I can sho you my room if you wod like…

I re-read the text a thousand times to make sure I hadn’t done anything to scare her off. I mean who flirts with a girl with brain injury? What was wrong with me? I couldn’t take advantage of her like that. Even if she was really pretty and did seem to act like everyone else for the most part. It was still wrong right? Right?

“I think the coast is clear, Mila.” Dinah breathed, patting me on the head reassuringly. “Would it be rude to tell her to stop typing in that annoying slang?” Dinah joked…partly, as she walked back over to where she was studying a textbook. Dinah wanted to be a nurse and was doing really good at the moment. I had no idea how she did it, I was drowning I my studies but she made it look effortless. Maybe it was that super brain of hers. Honestly, you should see the girl do maths.

“Yes Dinah. That would be incredibly rude.” I rolled my eyes and laid against the headboard of my bed typing a reply. This time free from emojis.

Camila(1:42): Definitely. We’ve got to work on those piano skills remember? And sure that would be cool.

“Sorry.” Dinah said completely unapologetically, “Oh! And you’re totally in there by the way.” She smirked.

“What?! Pfft! What?,” I feigned innocence. “Just because a gorgeous girl I’d never met before leaves beautiful flowers on my doorstep with a nice heartfelt note - completely and only intended to cheer me up - and then agrees to go and get coffee with me, does NOT mean I like her, Kay?” I scoffed and falsely declined her claims.

“You went to get coffee with her?!” Dinah shrieked. And I imbed my ears dramatically.

“I didn’t say that.” I dismissed her claims even though I knew it was true and grabbing my earphones form my bedside table and shoving them into my phone and then my ears to block Dinah out as I blared Ed Sheeran’s new album, divide, into my ears but not before I heard Dinah mutter out a “Sure Jan.”

-

I was sprawled across my bed listening to music with a copy of Rupi Kaur’s Milk and honey in my hands as I read the beautiful awakening poetry when a knock on the door disrupted our comfortable silence, but I made no move to get it.

“Aren’t you going to get that?” Dinah asked annoyed.

“nope.” I said turning on my back to face the ceiling and make a statement,

“Wow okay then… I see how it is.” Dinah spoke walking over to the door. No wait- she was walking over to me and thud! I landed flat out on the floor with a undoubtably bruised hip.

“Dinah what the fuck?!” I yelled as she yanked open the door.

“Oh hey, flower girl.” Dinah greeted enunciating the last part so I’d hear and scramble to my feet as she let the green eyed girl into our room.

“Hi” she greeted looking at me curiously as I got to my feet, probably wondering why the hell I was on the floor.

“Um- Hi. I-um dropped my book.” I spluttered, then realising my book was still on the floor so I ducked down to grab it before laughing nervously.

“L-looks like y-you’ve got…the stutter n-now.” Lauren joked speaking slowly, but it wasn’t too bad. I had gotten used to it by now and had familiarised it in a way that I associated it just with lauren’s style of talking and not a result of a head injury, though I did wonder how she got it and what had happened to her.

“Haha, guess so.” I chuckled nervously feeling Dinah’s eyes burning into the side of my head. “So what brings you here?” I asked trying to appear smooth and relaxed, but it was hard when her piercing eyes were staring into me like that.

“You wanted to see my room.” Lauren spoke hesitantly, phrasing it more as a question than an answer, whilst shifting on her feet awkwardly like she was getting ready run away at any given second. “Un..less y-your busy. I’m s-s-sorry, I s-s-should have ask…ed first.” Lauren said and I noticed the way she slowly broke down the word ‘asked’ like a third grader would trying to learn to read.

“No, no.” I waved my hands frantically to try and stop her from leaving as she backed away to the door. “Now is perfect!” I said quickly placing my book on my bedside table in its special space and opening and closing the front page three times, before turning to an excited Lauren who was more than ready to show me her room. Like I said before, she was so endearing.

“D-Do you wanna come, D-Dinah?” She turned to the young blonde girl who was watching us interestedly, like she didn’t have nothing better to do.

“Sure!” She jumped up, walking past both of us and straight out the door but not before stopping and smirking at me.

“It’s up here.” Lauren said leading us out and up the stairs in the middle of the corridor and to room 27 which was located smack bag in the middle of the top floor which had predominantly less rooms than all the other floors because it was so high up in the building.

The taller girl unlocked the door and pushed it open gently and holding it open for us revealing a bunch of beads dangling down from the other side of the door frame. It was a wonder how she even closed her door.

“Wow.” I said taken slightly aback but the eccentric colouring.

“I know!” Lauren said turning to us excitedly and bouncing on her feet a little, clearly unable to contain her happiness, leading us through the beads and into her room. It was a bit smaller than ours but then again We had three people living in our room, so it was understandable.

She had a little kitchen in the corner of the room that opened out into the living room and a separate doorway that was also draped with beaded curtains. On her walls were posters of singers and bands such as The 1975, Lana Del Rey and Bob Marley which was hung up slightly crookedly for what I assumed was effect…a very annoying effect.

The small two seater sofa was draped in a purple throw to make it look a lot nicer as it sat in the middle of the room next to a soft yellow rug.

“Wow.” I said again not really sure what to say to the avalanche of contradicting colours.

“You like it?!” She asked excitedly and I noticed her stutter disappears when she’s happy. It had now and it had in the cafe and both times it happen was because she was distracted by emotion.

“It looks like a rainbow threw up in your room.” Dinah said looking around with a look of pure cringe as I nudged her in the stomach to shut up. “Hey, don’t hit me!” Dinah yelled drawing attention to our little interaction that I was trying to keep on the down low. I swear she does it on purpose sometimes. “There’s nothing wrong with a good rainbow,” Dinah winked at me and I instantly knew what her game was. “Right, Flower girl?”

“Right-t. I love colours.” Lauren agreed oblivious to Dinah’s subliminal message.

“Hmm…what about purple and pink? There is a lot of purple here so…” Dinah pushed and I wanted to push her…down a flight of stairs!

“I like purple. Pink is nice as well, it’s s-soft.” Lauren explained shrugging and walking over to the sofa I was previously looking at. “This is purple and I l-like this. My m-mom brought it f-for m-me.”

“Hmmm…supportive parents. Interesting.” Dinah glanced at me smugly as she followed Lauren around the room and I stood awkwardly on the spot watching their interaction, because I low key wanted to know as well…for research purposes. “No pictures of your girlfriend?” Dinah questioned brashly going out on a whim, picking up Lauren’s picture frames filled with pictures of what I assumed was her family. It was in moments like this that I wished Dinah would be a little less direct, because if there was one thing anyone needed to know about Dinah Jane Hansen it was that she had no chill.

I carefully watched Lauren’s reaction to Dinah’s words, hoping she wasn’t a homophobe who would freak and kick us out, though I doubted it Lauren didn’t seem like the type she was too nice and to accepting of things.

“No.” Lauren said. She didn’t freak out or deny any claims on her sexuality but she did seem to tense and pause before answering the question, maybe she wasn’t comfortable in her sexuality yet or maybe she was really just straight. Either way she didn’t shut Dinah down on that one so I guess there was no ill blood.

“Then who’s this?” Dinah said picking up a picture frame of a really pretty girl posing camera ready, in front of a tree wearing a cap and gown from what I guessed was her high school graduation, “Because she looks to dark to be related to you.” Dinah pointed out, again with no filter.

“That’s m-my friend…M-Mani.” Lauren said taking the picture from Dinah and placing it gently back down. I could tell instantly that this person was important to Lauren just by the way she was looking so fondly at the picture but there was also a hint sadness like Lauren really missed the girl; who I guessed was still living in New York or attending another college somewhere.

“She seems nice.” I spoke up, “Do you miss her?” I asked walking closer and placing a comforting hand on Lauren’s shoulder, but as I did the beautiful girl tensed up and began to look incredibly uncomfortable so I removed my hand.

“I..I do. S-she has always…been there for me. Especially after…” Lauren trailed off after glancing at Dinah, but I got what she was referring to and I had instant admiration for this Mani girl, because standing by someone through such a difficult time must have been hard for anyone.

“Why do you stutter so much?!” Dinah asked brashly making Lauren bow her head in embarrassment and shame at herself, which honestly felt like a punch to the heart seeing her sad facial expression. There was a flicker of  emotion on Lauren’s face which only lasted a second but looked an awful lot to me like self hatred. I’d know, I’ve felt that way too many times before.

“Dinah! Don’t be rude!” I reprimanded the girl.

“What it was just a question?” Dinah said throwing her hands up in surrender.

“Well next time use a filter.” I said slightly angrier than I intended and I didn’t know where this defensiveness came from. I guess Lauren was so nice to me from the get go that I wanted to do the same for her.

“Um- D-do you..want…to…see…my…bedroom?” Lauren asked quietly speaking even slower than before as she tried to enunciate every word correctly to avoid a stutter for the sake of Dinah, making me mad because she was just getting comfortable with herself and talking without apologies around me.

“Yeah sure. I’d love to Lauren!” I said over enthusiastically to make up for Dinah’s brashness, following her over to the doorway that must have lead to her room. She had a separate room!! Damn, now I was wishing I had joined late if it got me more room.

“I decorated it myself.” Lauren said proudly as she lead me through yet another beaded curtain and into her bedroom. There was no other way to describe it other than a hippie den. There were flowers covering every surface and tapestries hanging from every wall in different prints and a soft pink yoga mat left laying on the floor along with a wheelchair tucked away discreetly in the corner of the room and I wondered why she would need a wheelchair if she could walk perfectly fine. “D-Do you like it?” Lauren asked as I heard Dinah slip into the room through the beaded curtains.

“It’s nice, though I wouldn’t have expected this from you to be honest.” I told her.

“What? Why not?” Lauren asked confused. “Is…it…the whole…N-new Yorker…thing..a…ag..ag..again.” Lauren said thinking hard before suffering out the final word after multiple attempts before she actually grasped it and for some reason I felt proud of her when she completed the word, which was weird, I know, seeing as I’ve only known the girl for a couple of days. But she was just so endearing and tried so hard and I just wanted to help her.

“Yeah, that’s exactly what it is.” I laughed, granted a bit more than usual, so she wouldn’t feel awkward and luckily she didn’t or she didn’t let on because she started laughed as well.

“C-Careful…C-Cabello or…I’ll..have..to mess..you up-p.” She threatened in her New York accent which was pretty good alongside her dramatic facial expressions, which were absolutely hilarious and made me erupt with laughter.

“You’re funny you are.” I commended pointing and twirling my finger in her face.

“T-That was meant to be s-scary.” the green eyed girl pouted.

“Aww, better luck next time, aye?” I laughed as she sent me her best attempt at a glare and if I didn’t know she was a big softie I probably would have been more intimidated.

We spent the next three or so hours hanging out in Lauren’s room talking and laughing, especially once Ally came up and joined us, because that girl was literally the funniest person on the planet and I was so glad I met her because she was so compassionate and had helped me deal with my anxieties and not feel like a weirdo because of my quirks as Ally liked to call them.

Dinah most have took the hint earlier, because she didn’t bring up any of Lauren’s speech impediments again. She did, however, continue to use for answers on whether she was single and into girls. but she never got an answer because Lauren always avoided the topic like the plague, it was actually quite funny to watch. If you imagine an episode of Tom and Jerry it quite resembled that except they were chasing each other or being hit in the face with brooms…yet. Dinah was still trying to push us together and I was a inch away from walking her in the face with one.

To be honest I didn’t see Lauren like that at least not yet. Sure she was attractive as hell and had a good personality but there wasn’t that spark that you hear about in books and movies. My world didn’t erupt into flames and fireworks when she was around and I didn’t get a flurry of butterflies in my stomach.

Instead I felt strangely at ease around Lauren, which was a rarity for me considering how anxious I got around people and for how short a time I had known her.

Maybe it was because we were both different in a way or maybe our auras matched.

The green eyed girl had been telling us about auras while we were chilling and that she believed certain people gravitated towards certain types of people based on their energy. Like some people who were surrounded around negatives energies tend to gravitate towards negative energies until they became one. It was an interesting theory she had, one that seemed to make sense, at least to me it did. Dinah just laughed and made a joke about Lauren spending too much time hitting that 4/20.

*Lauren’s POV*

Camila, Dinah Ally and I had been hanging out in my room for the past three hours and as much as I was loving the company and the new found normalcy I had a pounding headache and the light was making me want to rip my eyes out of their sockets just to provide some relief, but I never got relief, not from anything, it just wasn’t in the playbook for me. So, I sat there and grin and bared it until Dinah complained about being hungry and dragged Ally and Camila off to get some food. Of course being the nice people that they were they offered me to come along but I just wanted to sleep; to lay in bed and relish in the escape.

In a place where I wasn’t aching with pain from head to toe, or could get through a whole conversation without a single stutter, or where I didn’t feel like an idiot for not knowing the correct word I wanted to use. In a world where I could express myself, A world where I could sing and dance and play piano. But most of all I wanted to live in a world where I wasn’t constantly looking over my shoulder in fear, because even in my dreams I couldn’t escape her.

I was stuck between a torturous dream state and a torturous reality. I debated taking a sleeping pill just to provide some relief and knock me out so much that I couldn’t dream, but then I ran the risk of not ever waking up again. The thought of that sounded nice, not dying. Just…not living.

In the end I didn’t get to make the decision because the pain in my head was too much and the light in my eyes forced my lids closed sending into a deep sleep as I laid on the couch completely spent and physically unable to move as exhaustion weighed me under from head to toe.

-

The loud club music blasted through the speakers hammering through my chest as I danced animatedly grinding up against my best friend Normani who had dragged me out to the clubs for our friends birthday party. “YASS Lauren!” Normani said clapping to the beat as we broke apart and I started dancing freely as laughter fell from my lips in pure happiness and content.

“LAUREN!! LAUREN!!” A voice called up behind me, much to my annoyance.

“What’s up Ke?” I said turning to the girl still swaying to the music flowing through me.

“Your phone.” She said handing me the buzzing device. 12 missed calls. All from Lucy.

“Nope. Not today.” Normani said snatching my phone from my hand and cutting the incoming call, before shoving it back into keana’s chest.

“But Mani..” I warned nervous of the wrath I’d face when I’d get home.

“What? Lauren, she’s a bitch, who cares if you piss her off for a bit?” Normani questioned. “Yeah..” Ke joined in agreeing with Normani as we all stood still in the middle of the club while everyone danced along to the music unbeknownst to our conversation.

“I do.” I told then getting slightly annoyed and slightly panicky because I’d missed a total of thirteen calls now.

“Oh come one Lo. What’s the worst she can do?” Normani asked arching her eyebrows pressingly.

“Can I at least-”

“No!” They both cut me off yelling in chorus.

“Ugh fine. Dump my phone and come dance with me you bitch.” I order Keana smirking a little as she rolled her eyes at me and Normani cheered happily before grabbing my hand and spinning me around to dance.

“Good decision Lo.” Normani spoke into my ear. “I don’t like her.” Normani said obviously referring to Lucy.

“Yeah but you like me, so deal with it because Lucy is the only reason I have a roof over my head and food to eat at the moment.” I told her.

“I told you, you could come live with me.”

“Normani. Babe. You and I both know your parents couldn’t not afford to keep me in their house as well.” I said, spinning Normani around in a circle to the music.

“I don’t care. Lucy isn’t good for you.”

“Lucy loves me.” I smiled at the thought of her, because she was the only person who actually loved me for me. The only person who ever would. So I danced the night away, knowing the girl I loved was waiting for me to come home to her. I danced and I danced and I danced, screaming the lyrics to songs I didn’t even know but I didn’t care because I was having fun with my friends. “HAPPY BIRTHDAY VERO!!!” I yelled as we all danced around the birthday girl jumping up into the air but when I landed it hurt, everything hurt. “Normani?” I called into the crowd of people who suddenly blurred together in a haze of shapes, except for the girl I was addressing. “Normani?!” I called again as she came closer at incredibly low dragged out pace that I didn’t think she’d ever reach me as pain gripped though my legs and I fell to the floor hitting my head. Hard, apparently because when I moved my suddenly heavy and very limp arms to touch the front side of my head my hand was soaked and thick red blood trickling down my arm as my head bled profusely. I tore my eyes away from Normani’s terrified ones stares at my hand that was painted red as I tried to put pressure on the wound and stop in from bleeding but it was no use. It just kept coming. “Normani help…” I choked out scared and unable to breathe as I looked at the blood and felt a sudden pain in my lung causing me to buckle over gasping for oxygen.

“Lauren? Lauren?!! What’s the matter?!” Normani asked looking confused and scared.

“Normani help…” I choked out again desperately as ice cold fear trickled down my back. “Mani I don’t want to die. Help me.” I begged.

“I told you, Lauren. I told you, but you didn’t listen.” Normani’s apologetic voice echoed around the room as the walls blended in and out and everyone suddenly came back into focus, but this time their eyes were ALL fixed on me.

“We told you, Lauren. We told you.” They all chorused together again and again and again as I tried to scamper away ashamed and scared as my head kept pouring blood and created a small pool on the floor as a familiar face stepped forward out of the centre of the crowd. I noticed all the music was gone now and I was met with nothing but silence as the distorted faces stared back at me with a devilish smirk mimicking the of the circle stepping out of the crowd. “Oh Lauren. Look at what a mess you’ve made.” Lucy tutted shaking her head disapprovingly of me and I scurried backwards in fear but as hard as I tried to move away the more rooted I became in the spot.

“Please Lucy. I love you, okay? I do, I love you. I’m sorry, please don’t hurt me!” I pleaded as she got closer and crouched down before me.

“Oh, my dear Lauren. Why would I ever hurt you? I love you.” She said forcefully with so much conviction as she caressed the blooded hair out of my face. “But you obviously don’t love me considering you willing hurt me…so now you’re going to have to pay.” She smiled maliciously and I felt my blood turn cold. I wanted to scream. I wanted to run, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t do anything. I was paralysed just watching the events play out as Lucy swung her leg back and I felt a blow into my stomach sending me backwards into the pool of blood as Lucy looked down on me sadly. “You should have loved me better, Lauren. If you had loved me like I love you, I wouldn’t have to do this.” She said almost regretfully as she lifted her boot up and brag it down against my head causing ever thing to go black.

A/N: Okay so I’m not sure how I feel about this one and I low-key have no idea what I’m doing so feedback is much appreciated.

I’m glad to see so many people enjoying my random ramblings though, So Thank youu (😉)

Wattpad: Midnight crossings

[5hfanfiction]

Sleeping at Sleepy's

“I swear to fucking God Dinah if you try to make me go with you to that-”

“Chill out Mila damn, I just need help picking out a new mattress for once I move in with Mani,” Dinah cuts in as she finesses into the parking lot of the mall that Camila’s been taken to in the false claim of Dinah wanting to buy her dinner at Chipotle. Camila should’ve known there would be a catch.

“Fine but I got a solid hour of sleep, if even that much, last night so don’t expect my feedback to be helpful, I’m going to find every mattress ten times more comfortable than it is,” Camila replies as she unbuckles her seatbelt and pushes her sunglasses up on her nose so the sunlight won’t make her feel dizzy again.

She’d been up all night writing an essay on the French Revolution and the effects on the rest of Europe and blah blah blah she doesn’t remember the half of it, only that she had to turn it in by the class at eight o'clock in the morning. She’s finished the essay at roughly half past six, quickly proofread it, and fallen asleep with her head on the desk, only waking up about twenty minutes later when her wheely chair slipped further back and her body flew forward since the desk was no longer there to hold her up.

“Now Mila we only have an hour so we’re gonna lie on as many as these bad boys as we can okay?” Dinah says as they finally make it to the large, two story Sleepy’s in one end of the mall and walk towards the first set up, king beds.

“Dinah no offence or anything but king beds? You aren’t going to be able to afford this no matter how comfortable it is,” Camila protests after about twenty minutes of watching Dinah roll around to test out the bed. She’s tied them too but she’s afraid if she lies down for more than a minute she’ll fall asleep so she’s been bouncing back up.

“Let me live out my dreams Chancho okay? If I want to pretend I’m able to treat myself I will pretend I’m able to treat myself now you shut your mouth.”

Camila rolls her eyes and opens her mouth to argue back but she catches sight of something that makes her stop in her tracks. A light grey fuzzy blanket covering a twin sized bed, which may be small but woah that looks comfy. She can’t stop herself from wandering over towards it and is almost close enough to jump in and block the world out when she’s cut off by a group of kids running by.

“Damn kids,” Camila mumbles as they beat her to the bed and hop in, messing up the set up and getting their dirty shoes all over it. She’s about to yell at them because she’s lacking sleep and that’s so rude, what type of parents let their kids act like that in a store? Singlehandedly elongating the jobs of a few people and ruining products. Before she can yell though someone else cuts in and now her heart stops more than it did when she saw the fuzzy blanket.

She’s probably Camila’s age. Jet black hair, green eyes Camila can see glistening from feet away. She’s scolding the kids, but not in a mean way, just telling them to move and to find their parents but they don’t look scared, they look like they just talked to an angel and Camila’s pretty sure they did.

She watches as the mystery worker runs a hand through her hair in frustration once the kids are gone and begins folding. She watches as she tugs one of the sheets off the bed and goes to redo it since the kids had kicked it out of place, she’s going to watch her as she fixes the pillows to but Dinah chooses then to walk up and pinch her side making her yelp in shock and green eyes turns their way, locking eyes for a minute then going back to work.

It happens like two more times. Camila will spot the beautiful worker, get lost in staring at her then Dinah will drop something or roll of a bed and scream and the employee will catch her eyes and smirk before turning back to work as Camila scrambles to not blush and to help Dinah.

Finally Dinah starts looking at more realistically sized mattresses and they end up oer with queen sized and full. Camila didn’t mean to lie down for over a minute but she honestly couldn’t help herself at this point and it’s not like Dinah actually needs her help so when Dinah gets up she doesn’t bother following.

“I’ll be over here,” Camila mumbles as she sinks further into the tempurpedic bed. She vaguely hears Dinah say something back but she’s out before she can process it and her last thought is ‘maybe I shouldn’t fall asleep in a Sleepy’s’.

“Umm, excuse me?” an unrecognizable voice breaks into Camila’s sleep riddled brain.

“Mm,” Camila whines out as she clutches onto the sleep she’s finally getting and snuggles deeper into the warmth.

“Miss? Can you wake up please?” the voice speaks again and Camila starts to come to her senses a little bit, realizing the bed is much comfier than the twin bed in her dorm and the voice isn’t her roommates and- wait a minute it’s comfier meaning she should stay sleeping.

“Five minutes,” Camila mumbles out as she makes up her mind and decides sleep is necessary right now.

“Oh? Umm… yeah okay I’ll um… yeah,” mystery voice replies and Camila doesn’t notice it because she’s already drifting back to sleep.

“Hey, you kinda need to get up? It’s been like ten minutes instead of five and I would give you longer I promise and next time- if you ever fall asleep here again which I doubt but- next time I’ll let you have like an hour, but I have to close up,” mystery voice is back and Camila hears it clearly, the hand on her shoulder a moment earlier having been the thing to wake her up.

It takes her a minute to process what the voice has said, even though she hears it clear. Because you see, the voice is really attractive, like raspy and shy kind of and just really cute and hot together and Camila takes a few seconds to think about that. And then she takes a few seconds to wonder what’s the weight on her arm and how someone’s hand could be that warm. And then, finally she takes note of the words “I have to close up” and she suddenly remembers lying down on a mattress while Dinah talked to an employee and she doesn’t remember ever getting up and holy shit this is about to be embarrassing.

“Holy fuck,” Camila bolts upright and almost knocks the employee onto the floor next to the bed but luckily Camila had chosen to nap on a queen sized so there was room enough to save the fall.

“Sorry shoot did I scare you? I should’ve like eased your wake up and not just sat here and started-”

“No frick it isn’t you I’m just- god I can’t believe how embarrassing this is,” Camila groans into her hands and sits up more in the bed and runs her hands through her hair to neaten it up, hoping she doesn’t seem as much of a mess as she feels. “I am so sorry I didn’t mean to fall asleep here and I probably made you have to stay longer than you usually would and, fuck I’m sorry.”

“Woah hey calm down it’s fine, really I had to go clean up some of the comforter’s anyways, kids messing them up all the time… really it’s okay, I wouldn’t have let you keep sleeping if it wasn’t,” the employee responds and Camila finally turns to face her and looks like her luck just keeps going up because this is the same girl from earlier that had taken Camila’s breath away. The same girl who probably caught her staring like twelve times with her jaw dropped in awe of how beautiful she is.

“I’m still sorry though,” Camila replies after a pause in not knowing what to say. “I mean, work sucks and having to wake some idiot up from her nap before you leave doesn’t help anything.”

“Well it isn’t too bad if it’s a cute girl and not some old dad,” the worker laughs and Camila laughs along and tries not to blush at being called cute. “Really though I figured you must’ve been tired if you were able to crash in the middle of a store so the least I can do is give you five more minutes when you ask.”

“Thank you then, I guess I was pretty exhausted,” Camila answers and accepts the mattress manager’s hand to help her up out of the bed. “I don’t know how Dinah convinced me to come with her anyways I mean I barely got any-” Camila stretches as she speaks but stops mid sentence because damn it where is her best friend? “Fuck, you haven’t happened to see another girl lingering amongst the mattresses have you? Tall, blonde, tan, obnoxious?” Camila questions because there goes her ride.

“Umm no, you’re the only one left in the store, probably in the whole building at this point it’s like… 10:30. Mall closed half an hour ago, I almost didn’t notice you since the store was cleared out like an hour ago,” the raven haired girl answers not exactly knowing why the other girl looks so anxious all of the sudden but then it clicks since she had just been talking about the friend she came with and she’s asking if Lauren has seen her. “Oh, umm… do you like need a ride or something?” she asks as she leads the way to the main exit.

“Umm… yeah I guess she must have left? Maybe she didn’t realize I was sleeping…” Camila trails off as she follows the girl down the flight of stairs towards the exit doors of Sleepy’s. She knows Dinah most likely left her there on purpose. Whether it was because of some plan to embarrass her once she noticed that she was asleep or if food or Normani had distracted her and she had left and assumed Camila would end up alright.

“I’m Lauren by the way,” the green eyed girl says once they make it to the doors and she has to grab her bag from the checkout area next to it before turning to face Camila with her hand outstretched for greeting even though they’ve been talking for a few now.

Camila takes the hand and smiles back at her, “Camila,” she replies and tries not to blush at the feeling of the soft hand in her hold.

“Well Camila I don’t want to come off strong or anything but if you really need a ride I have time to spare?” Lauren offers up in case she didn’t make the offer clear the first time. “I mean unless you live like an hour away… which actually I could probably still take you maybe if you needed a ride because ubers can be creepy at this time of night and also I wouldn’t want you having to wait outside since the mall security won’t let anyone inside the building past-”

“Lauren, Lauren calm down it’s not- I only live like ten minutes away in the dorms for University of Miami. So if you’re sure about giving me a ride I would really appreciate it,” Camila smiles and Lauren blushes because of her awkward rambling but nods in agreement before leading the way out.

It takes Lauren a minute of struggling to pull down the security gate for Sleepy’s and Camila smirks but holds in her laughter so Lauren doesn’t get embarrassed, plus if Camila ever tried to pull one of those down she’d either fall and look like an idiot or not be able to pull it at all and look like an idiot so she’s got to give Lauren props.

“So you go to Miami?” Lauren asks in attempt to make small talk as they walk through the darkened mall towards the main exit. “What are you studying?”

“Yes I do, I’m currently majoring in physical therapy and minoring in sports medicine,” Camila answers, feeling more badass than ever walking around an abandoned mall even if it’s because she feel asleep in a mattress store. If she ignores that small fact it feels kind of like she’s doing something sneaky or illegal. “What about you? I’m assuming the dream isn’t to sell mattresses forever? No pun intended,” Camila jokes and Lauren can’t hold in her laughter there obviously because dreams of selling mattresses? That’s genius.

“Not exactly no, I graduated from FSU last year, my dad got sick so I came back this year to help out with my little siblings but he’s better now,” Lauren explains and wonders if it was too much information but Camila just looks at her with interest so she assumes she’s okay to continue. “I took part in the nursing program though so hopefully I can get back on track for next semesters, I might look into a few courses at Miami so I don’t have to move back.”

“That seems like a lot of work this past year then, you know moving and helping out, I’m sorry about your dad but glad to hear he’s doing better,” Camila says as they push open the big doors and pulls her coat a little tighter around herself because even if it isn’t freezing in Miami there is always a chill that comes at night and since Dinah ditched her it is in fact night.

“Yeah it has been pretty busy but hey, at least naps on the job are easier, right mattress girl?” Lauren jokes and Camila laughs but also blushes and Lauren nudges her in the ribs and she blushes more because Lauren just touched her even if it was in the most platonic was ever.

They make it to Lauren’s car, a white Jeep wrangler, and hop int either side. Lauren is quick to switch the heat on and Camila is grateful for that because her cheap hoodie isn’t pulling any luck for her.

“Okay so I’ll drive towards the dorms and just tell me instructions on the way.”

Camila smiles when Lauren puts on The 1975 quietly while they make there way and they make small talk but not a lot, eventually they’re both humming along to the music and not caring about whether or not they really know each other, it feels comfortable.

Camila learns more about Lauren’s music taste when she lets Camila put on Ed Sheeran’s new music but they do argue over whether Shape of You or Castle on the Hill is better, eventually agreeing to disagree because obviously once you’ve made up your mind on that it isn’t going to change.

“Okay so it’s the first left then straight for a little bit,” Camila instructs as they pull into the dorms area. It’s almost eleven now and Camila had told her roommate Ally that she’d be back by nine but luckily Ally is a sweetheart and won’t be too mad, probably just worried sick.

“So what year are you?” Lauren asks, lowering the music so they can talk for the last minute.

“Junior,” Camila replies with smile as she zips up her sweatshirt in preparation for the awkward run up to the door of her dorm. “So you got two years on my but that’s nothing where it counts,” she jokes and Lauren laughs. “And it’s this one on the right.”

Lauren pulls up to the side of the road and both girls go quiet, not quite knowing how to end the night.

“I umm, thank you for the ride and everything,” Camila says as she turns in her seat to face the nervous looking driver. “I’m sorry I fell asleep at your job but also I’m kinda glad I got to talk to you sooo,” Camila trails off and Lauren lets out a laugh at her bluntness.

“Yeah I’m glad too, thank god you were tired or I would’ve been bored cleaning up, instead I was laughing at the girl who fell asleep in a mattress store,” she teases and Camila playfully smacks her arm as both girls laugh.

“Well I guess I should go,” Camila concludes and Lauren nods in agreement but neither girl looks way from each other. “Can I have your number? In case I want to order that mattress or anything?” Camila asks nervously but trying to keep her cool and Lauren sees right through her and blushes.

“Yeah umm… yeah here let me,” Lauren stutters out and looks for a pen somewhere, fumbling for a moment in the glove compartment but coming up with one. Camila holds out her hands and Lauren hesitantly takes it and pulls the cap between her teeth to write her digits on the smooth hand offered to her.

“Thank you, it was really comfy and all so I’ll probably call you soon, maybe discuss business over dinner this weekend?” Camila grows bold and Lauren blushes and nods.

“Yeah I’d umm, I’d like that.”

“Okay well um,” Camila breathes out and decides to go for it, leaning in to press a short kiss to Lauren’s warm cheek and grinning when the older girl’s blush deepens, “thanks again for everything, you Mount Rushmore,” Camila continues and laughs at Lauren’s questioning look. “Like cause Mount Rushmore is made of rocks? So I’m saying you rock, get it?” Camila elaborates and Lauren gives her a confused look before bursting into the cutest laughter Camila has ever seen.

“Goodnight Camila,” Lauren smiles teasingly, not addressing the horrible joke but giggling still at it as she studies Camila’s wide grin at her own joke.

“Goodnight Lauren,” Camila smiles back and opens the door, stepping out and shutting it before leaning into the window which Lauren opened as she stepped out. “I’ll see you around?” she bites her lip and Lauren nods before speaking again.

“If you ever need a nap or date or something, you know where to find me,” she jokes and Camila’s been smiling since like ten minutes ago and she thinks she’s going to really like Lauren.

[5hfanfiction]

Our Month - Chapter 23

For Camila, everything froze in that moment. The air stuck in her lungs, her mouth went dry, her feet were unable to move and it was a big chance that her heart stopped. The sheet fell out of her hands but she didn’t dare to look away because she was afraid that Lauren will disappear.

Her eyes were focused on the girl in front of her and she tried to comprehend the fact that she actually could touch the raven-haired musician she craved for all these time but the brunette couldn’t move. The young student’s mind was racing through the scenarios what could happen now. Will Lauren start to yell at her or will she act like old friends? Maybe she will pretend that they didn’t even know each other…

Camila tried to read the singer’s facial expression but it just showed completely pure shock like she wasn’t believing the events.

– Am I in coma? – Lauren asked faintly and rhetorically.

– That’s what I was trying to tell you – Dinah mumbled while Normani giggled quietly in the corner. – It’s good to see you Mila.

The greeting still didn’t elicited a single movement from the brunette, her eyes were constantly glued to Lauren and it made the Polynesian realize that their presence is completely unnoticed by the Latinas.

A few seconds after Camila opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out so she closed it again. She repeated it a few times but failed every attempt to speak up. Her heart caught up with everything her brain was already aware of and her vision started to became blurry from the tears which were threatening to spill. She was so overwhelmed to see the older woman actually being so close to her.

– Camz? – Lauren whispered and it made Camila to flung forward and embrace her in a tight hug, burying her face into the musician’s crook of neck.

The brunette inhaled the sweet scent she used to dream about and she started to silently sob when she could actually feel the warmth radiating from the pale-skinned girl’s body. Her Lauren was in her arms again and the world suddenly felt a better place.

– I missed you – Lauren whispered and her body was shaking from getting emotional as well.

– O my God – Camila let her tears escape and she was fully crying. – I missed you so much Lo! So much…

The student started to release her piton grip on the American just to be able to look into those gorgeous green orbs again. The raven-haired Latina’s eyes were shining brightly, her smile took up her whole face and it made her band mate’s heart flutter too because it was a long time ago when they saw her honestly grinning like this.

– And I’m really proud of you, I wanted to tell you so bad but I knew I couldn’t. You were amazing Lo, you still are amazing and I wish… – Camila started to ramble but her phone cut her of with her knew ringtone of ‘I can’t help falling in love with you.’

It made Lauren burst out giggling and while the brunette’s face flushed to the deepest shade of red she couldn’t fight the smile creeping up on to her lips because the musician was just so adorable.

– I guess you were serious when you said you will stalk me – the raven-haired Latina smirked while the brown-eyed girl declined her best friend’s call.

– Shut up and don’t be so self-absorbed I just have this because the blonde girl who sang the second verse is hot in bikini… – Camila answered.

– Great DJ, now they acknowledging you but I’m still non-existent – the black-skinned beauty fake grimaced from the further end of the room.

– Shh Mani! Just let me witness the Camren cuteness and let them praise me! – Dinah hushed her band mate.

– Yeah right, that’s why we heard the first part, which is mine… And I’m hot in bikini too – Lauren quickly shot back.

– Although you’re hotter without it… – the younger woman wiggled her eyebrows but immediately regretted what she said. Lauren’s cheeks turned red from the initiations but a small smile was content on her lips.

– Sorry Mani, the Uber driver wanted to chat that’s why we’re late! – Ally slung open the door with Lucy following her and they came face-to-face with the sight of a doctor hovering over a smiling Lauren. – Ugh, sorry doctor for the interruption!

– What did they give to her? – Lucy looked at Dinah quite shocked but when the person in the white coat turned around she already knew the answer.

– Camila?! – Ally asked in disbelief and it made the Latina’s to actually pay attention to everyone else in the ward.

– Ohh, hey! – she offered a shy wave for them before she turned back to Lauren.

– You just interrupted in the right time because I swear they were about to recreate some steamy episode of Grey’s Anatomy – Normani chuckled.

– So doctor Camila, what’s the verdict? Is she dying from the moping she did after you? – Lucy questioned and Ally elbowed her because it was still a touchy subject.

– Uhh, omm, no – the brunette cleared her throat and she switched to her professional tone. – You were dehydrated, exhausted and probably that caused your fainting. When you collapsed you hit your head which resulted you to have a mild concussion but there is nothing to worry about. I was informed that you would want to leave the hospital but I would recommend you to stay for the night for safety re…

– Okay! I’ll stay – Lauren agreed a bit too eagerly.

– Really bish? I had to shout at you and she just 'recommends’ something and you’re agreeing? – Dinah quirked an eyebrow before she turned to Ally – She’s still whipped as hell.

– She’s a professional! – the green-eyed girl defended herself nonchalantly because she was busy staring at the younger Latina’s smile.

– So is the doctor who you were shouting at in Spanish – Camila smirked.

– Still sassy. I like it! – Normani laughed.

– Unfortunately she can’t stay. If you remember, we scheduled an interview today and we have a show tomorrow which we should rehears for… – Lucy explained.

– But… But I’m… I’m sick? I don’t want to risk getting worse… – Lauren tried but everybody saw through her really weak reasoning.

– Don’t worry, you’ll be fine – the student offered a gentle smile. – I can dismiss you but I’ll need your signature and a stamp from my tutor.

Lauren’s expression change into pure panic. She just saw her Camila again she will not let her go just like that. She felt the small stings from the tears which threatened to spill once again but now not from joy, now from sorrow again. She can’t lose the brunette twice. Her heart is not able to handle that.

– And I might add my phone number on the bottom too. You know just in case if something happens? – the student murmured nervously.

– Yes! – the American almost shouted and when she realized how fast and how needy she sounded she blushed from embarrassment. – I mean khm safety reasons… yeah, cool, okay.

– That was really lame Lauser – Dinah chirped.

– I think it’s cute – Camila shrugged before realizing she let her thoughts slip. – I’ll come back with the things. See you soon?

Lauren’s smile couldn’t get any bigger after the small confirmation that she will indeed see the caramel-skinned Latina again and she felt like she’s on the top of the world. Her severe headache was non-existent, her anxiety was long gone and the Camila shaped hole in her heart was filled again. She decided that fainting on stage was her favorite thing in this tour so far.

– See you soon Camz – she answered and she almost added an 'I love you’ but quickly stopped herself.

The brunette basically gamboled through the halls, she radiated joy and happiness. She typed a quick message to her tutor that the patient would like to leave and she needed his stamp and signature for the releasing documents.

– Wow! – Shawn noticed her. – You look like someone from a very cheesy musical. What the hell happened? What did you take?

– Nothing? Ohh! Anna, you called me – she turned to her best friend.

– First of all yes, I did and it is really rude to ignore me like that. Second of all, who are you and what did you do to my Mila? Ohh, you saw Dinah too?! – she guessed.

– How did you know that? – Camila asked amused.

– I ran into her, she was going for coffee and she asked for directions. And then I asked her to sign something for you and when I mentioned you she just ordered me to get you to meet with her and she ran off. Oh and she said Cheechee’s order… – she explained.

– Yeah, I met her already – the Latina answered nonchalantly.

– Why are you acting like it’s not a big deal? – Shawn asked suspiciously. – And more importantly why was she acting like she knew you?

– She kind of does – the brunette offered a shy smile and bit her lip. – I spent a lot of time with the girls when I was overseas so we became pretty good friends with Dinah.

– I’m gonna shit my pants – Anna’s jaw dropped to the floor. – WHY AM I HEARING THIS JUST NOW?

– Long story and I promise I will tell you later but now I need to work. And actually you two should too! Not just gossiping around here – Camila winked at them playfully.

– I bet it has to do something with Michelle – Shawn whispered to Anna.

– Maybe she is here with the Fifth Harmony crew as well. Or she is some relative of Dinah… she has a family as big as the population of our whole country – she watched her best friend bouncing on the hallways like a ball of joy.

– I met Anna, she said they’re from Hungary – Dinah said while furiously tapping on her phone.

- Like Barbara Palvin? - Ally asked but she never got an answer because everybody was busy searching for the foreigner.

– And currently she is staying in London, what else do we know? Did you catch her first name? She said it when she introduced herself… – Normani hovered over the device and looked as Dinah adds an another filter to the search baron Facebook.

– I think it was Caballo? – Lucy said. – She was wearing a name tag but I didn’t pay too much attention to it so it can be something else too…

– It sounded like it – Dinah agreed.

– It’s Cabello – Camila chuckled because she just found them spying on her.

– It’s not what it looks like – Normani tried to defend them but the situation was more than obvious.

– Sure, Jan. So I have everything you need – the student turned to Lauren who was in her jeans already but from up she was still wearing the hospital gown but about to change. – You just need to sign here that you leave at your own risk.

– Okay – the green-eyed girl scanned the paper for the other Latina’s phone number but she couldn’t find it. She tried not to look disappointed while she scribbled her signature down on the paper. – And…uhh…

– And my number is here – Camila offered a piece from a cross-word puzzle and she bit down on her lip, fighting against grinning widely. – And your spies probably already found me on social media too, so…

– Agent Hansen confirms Facebook and Agent Kordei is working on Instagram – Dinah saluted.

– You’re so embarrassing DJ – Normani rolled her eyes.

– When do you have a break? – Lauren asked.

– When you give her one – Lucy interjected.

– We give you some privacy – Ally shook her head and lead everybody else out of the ward leaving the Latinas alone.

– I have a break in an hour but I can postpone it for later if you can come back – Camila offered.

– That would be great but I don’t want to keep you waiting – Lauren smiled sadly.

– I’ll survive. So, call me when you’re back and I’ll meet you in front of the doctor’s room? – the brunette proposed and the raven-haired singer couldn’t contain her happiness so she nodded quickly and wrapped her arms around the caramel-skinned woman.

– I can’t believe you’re here – Lauren whispered, burying her hands in the mahogany lock, pulling the student as close as she wouldn’t consider inappropriate.

– And you’re here – Camila answered and tightened her arms on the American signaling that she wasn’t ready to let go of the musician just yet.

She wanted to say that she still loves her, that she was miserable without her and she thought about her every day but she felt that what they have now is so fragile that a wrong word could shatter it. The brunette knew that they can’t just jump back right where they left off. They need to talk first about a lot of things. And the worst case Lauren was already over her and had somebody new. She decided not to say those three words out loud so she just inhaled and let herself feel everything. The scent of the singer’s shampoo and perfume, the warmth of her body, the softness of her pale skin and the butterflies in her own stomach.

– I missed you, you know? – she mumbled and slowly let go of the older woman.

– I missed you, too – Lauren smiled adorably and pecked the caramel-skinned student fairly on the cheek.

The green-eyed Latina figured she didn’t know how they are now. Are they going to finally be in a relationship or are they just acquaintances? Friends? She didn’t want to push anything because she wanted the younger girl back to her life whatever form she could get her.

– So see you soon? – Camila stepped back because her phone was buzzing like crazy in her pocket for minutes now, so she knew she has to leave like five minutes ago.

– See you soon, Camz – Lauren looked at her with adoration and it made the younger’s heart flutter.

They parted ways as soon as they stepped out of the door but now they knew it’s just temporary.  

At least for now.

Because this doesn’t mean their problems are gone too. Lauren still was a pop star. Camila still lived in Europe. And now they only have two days before one of them has to leave.

Maybe they need to realize that meeting now was not destiny or a sign from the universe, maybe it was just a cruel accident.

Because loving the right person in wrong time is the biggest irony and the greatest sadness.

A/N: Hey :) *sweating nervously because you just got the reunion but the last sentence will make you realize it’s not the fluff you expected* Next update will come slowly as well because… ya know… exams.

Thank you for sticking with the story and voting and commenting and everything <3

God bless y'all in Allysus voice.

B.

[5hfanfiction]

you keep robbing my heart like a bank ~camren~ 7/?

Camila: hey lauren do u need a ride to the mall?

Lauren: No that’s okay! Ally is driving us there. We’re meeting at 4 right?

Camila: yes ma'am :) see u then

Before Camila can do anything else, a heavy weight drops on top of her back.

“You’re so heavy. Get off of me, DJ.” Camila’s groan is muffled as her face gets pushed into the bedspread.

“Yeah, Dinah,” Normani chimes in from where she’s spinning in her desk chair. “You don’t want to kill Mila before she has a chance to declare her undying love for Lauren.”

“Oh yeah, of course not!” Dinah agrees loudly in Camila’s ear but makes no move to get off of her.

Camila blindly tosses a pillow at Normani but of course completely misses the girl. After some struggling, she’s finally able to roll out from underneath Dinah and Camila sits up as she throws a glare at Normani. “I’m not in love with Lauren.”

“I don’t know. I mean, when you’re into someone for three years, I don’t think that can be called a crush anymore,” Normani argues.

“More like an obsession,” Dinah pitches in, dodging the pillow Camila lobs at her.

“Shut up you assholes. Don’t go throwing the L word around. I just really like her, okay?”

Normani pouts sympathetically at the girl, finally pausing her swiveling. “You’re right. But are you every going to actually do something about it?”

“I’m trying,” Camila groans, flinging herself backwards onto the lone remaining pillow and rubbing at her eyes with the heels of her hands. “This shit is hard.”

“Well you better do something soon, before Zayn makes a move. Lauren likes his attention, you can tell,” Dinah says, lying down next to Camila.

“Mila,” Normani begins. “You should really tell him that you like Lauren. You know what he’s like. He’ll back off because he cares about you.”

Glancing at Normani with tired eyes, Camila ponders over the girl’s words. 

Why hasn’t she told Zayn yet? Camila knows that if she admitted her crush on Lauren to him, he would respect it and stop making advances. He’s one of her closest friends. Hell, the guy would get involved in fights that he had nothing to do with just so that Camila wouldn’t have to deal with them alone. He’s one of Camila’s closest friends and would never make a move on someone she likes.

“You’re right. I should tell him.”

“Fuck yeah I’m right, I’m always right.”

“No, not really,” Dinah comments from where she’s examining her nails.

Normani throws a dirty look at Dinah that the girl completely misses. “I don’t recall asking you, ho.”

“You didn’t have to.”

“Mila,” Normani whines from her seat. “Smack Dinah for me.”

Camila rolls over away from the two, unlocking her phone and tapping on an app. “No. I’m busy. I need to beat my high score in Flippy Bottle.”

All of a sudden, a shadow looms over Camila and she gazes up to see Normani’s face haloed by her dark hair. “I bet that if Lauren asked, you would have done it right away.”

Camila feels movement behind her as Dinah sits up to join in on the teasing. “I bet you would do anything for Lauren.”

“Anything she wanted.” Normani draws out her words, a smirk on her face at Camila’s narrowed eyes.

“Oh my god, Mani!” Dinah suddenly exclaims, bouncing up onto her knees. “Lauren would totally top Camila!”

Bursting into loud laughter, Normani collapses back into her desk chair as Dinah joins in. 

“Shut the fuck up, Normani!” Camila shouts but it pretty much goes unnoticed. She would throw a pillow at the girl but she doesn’t want to use the one she’s lying on. “I’m not a bottom!”

“Maybe not usually, but with this girl you would be,” Normani barely gets out between her snickering.

Flaring her nostrils, Camila locks her phone and sits up, scowling at the two girls in hysterics. “I’m leaving. I’ll see you two assholes at the mall.”

Throwing herself forward, Dinah wraps her arms tightly around Camila’s waist, effectively preventing the girl from standing up. “No! Don’t leave, Mila. We’re just joking.”

“Yeah, we’re sorry,” Normani offers with a pout, but there’s still a small smirk that she can’t keep off of her face.

“I’m not a bottom,” Camila whispers, an angry pout on her face.

Dinah pats the girl on the shoulder, sitting back with a grin. “Whatever you say, honey.”

~~

“Hello, guys!” Ally greets happily as the three girls approach the table.

Camila returns the grin Ally sends her, smiling even wider when she sees Lauren wave nervously but friendly at them.

“Hey Dinah, Normani. H– hi Camila,” Lauren stutters cutely.

Camila is about to take the other seat next to Lauren, the one that Ally isn’t occupying, when Dinah plops herself onto it before Camila can.

“What’s up, Lauser? You going to do some shopping today?”

“Um, yeah, maybe.”

Gripping the chair that was supposed to be hers, Camila huffs as Dinah keeps making conversation with Lauren. She sees Dinah glance at her with a mischievous smirk before turning back to Lauren and standing up. “I know Camila has just been dying all day to see you, so I won’t keep you from her any longer.”

As Dinah walks away from the two with a shit-eating grin on her face, Camila has to reign in the urge to smack it. She knows Lauren hates violence, so instead she attempts to hide her flushed face and claims her seat next to Lauren (she did say that she wants to change, and Lauren being here influenced her restraint, so she supposes the girl is helping her, even unintentionally).

“Don’t listen to her,” Camila says, trying to cover up her blush with an eye roll. “Dinah just likes to fuck with people.”

The giggle Lauren lets out tells Camila that the girl doesn’t quite believe her.

Lauren reaches her arm out to grab a cup, taking a few sips before setting it back down on the table. Camila sees the Tropical Smoothie Cafe logo on the side in between Lauren’s fingers that are still wrapped around it.

“What flavor did you get?” Camila asks, nodding towards the smoothie.

“It’s called, um, Paradise Point, I think.”

Camila nods although she’s not familiar with that flavor. “I don’t think I’ve tried that one before.”

Taking another sip, Lauren swirls the straw around, mixing the fruit juice with the ice. “There’s, uh… strawberries, banana, and pineapple in it.” She takes another gulp, hesitating before holding it out towards Camila. “Di– do you want to try some? It’s delicious.”

Camila raises her eyebrows, a little surprised that Lauren offered. “Sure,” she says, but instead of accepting the cup from Lauren, she just leans forward, grasping the straw between her lips and taking a few pulls of the fruity drink while keeping eye contact with Lauren.

When Camila finally leans back and notices Lauren’s flushed cheeks, she smiles fondly to herself because it’s just too easy to get a reaction out of this girl.

“Hey guys,” Camila hears behind her and turns around to see Shawn smiling at them.

“Hope you weren’t waiting too long,” Ariana pitches in from next to him.

“No, we just got here,” Normani explains. “Plus we’re still waiting on Zayn.”

Camila feels a little grateful that he’s running late. He’s one of her best friends and all, but… is it so bad that she wants a little alone time with her crush?

“Oh, I just got a text from him. He said he’s running late so he’ll just meet us at one of the stores,” Shawn reads off of his phone.

“So then, where should we go?” Ariana asks. “Because, I mean… I’m not sure Shawn wants to follow us all to like, Victoria’s Secret or something.”

“Well, it depends on what I get to see.” He smirks at Ariana until she rolls her eyes and shoves him. “Just kidding. Honestly, I’m cool with anything. Where do you guys want to go?”

Standing up from her seat, Dinah walks over to Shawn with a pout on her face. “But I wanted to see you try on the new Pink collection.”

The giggle Lauren lets out from next to Camila has her stomach doing flips.

“Fat chance, DJ. You can recruit Zayn for that, thank you very much.”

Suddenly, Camila gets an idea and decides to speak up. “Why don’t we split into two separate groups? And then when Zayn arrives, he can just meet up with one of them.” Truthfully, Camila is hoping that he’ll meet up with the group that doesn’t have her or Lauren in it so that she can get extra alone time with the girl.

In the end, they all decide to go with Camila’s suggestion. Normani, Dinah, Shawn, and Ariana make up one group (deciding to go to Victoria’s Secret after all because Normani wanted a new swimsuit [Shawn jokingly promises he’ll behave but still gets smacked by the three girls]). Meanwhile, Ally, Camila, and Lauren choose to head to H&M, seeing if they can find some new outfits for themselves.

Rising from her chair, Camila offers her hand out to help Lauren up. She doesn’t let go once the girl is stand, and they head out of the cafeteria behind Ally, Lauren blushing at their joined hands while sipping her smoothie.

Lauren wordlessly holds the straw up to Camila who gently squeezes the girl’s hand in a silent thank you as she takes a drink.

“Are you going to get anything, Ally?” Lauren reaches forward to nudge the girl, accepting the arm Ally hooks through hers.

“Yeah, probably,” Ally replies. “I want to get a new pair of jeans. Remember that snap I sent you of the chili Tori spilled on me?” Ally waits for Lauren’s nod before continuing. “Well, the stain didn’t come out. Thank God the stuff wasn’t hot anymore.”

Lauren lets out a laugh, clamping her mouth shut embarrassedly when it comes out louder than she meant for it to. “Oopsies,” she giggles adorably (this girl fucking said oopses; Camila doesn’t know how she’s going to survive being just friends with her). “That was really funny though! Tori was sending me snaps of you yelling at her.”

“That’s what she was doing? I should have known.”

Ally continues telling Lauren about that day, meanwhile Camila is content to just hold hands with Lauren and watch her. The girl seems so comfortable and relaxed and at ease, and it makes Camila really happy to see it. 

Camila intertwines their fingers, but Lauren is so engaged in her conversation that she doesn’t even notice the change in position and instead just grips Camila’s hand tighter.

They finally arrive at the store and decide to follow Ally and help her pick out a pair of pants. Lauren stands off to the side, clutching her smoothie in both hands as she cutely sips at it, gazing around the store with wide eyes.

As Ally is sifting through the selection, she picks up a pair of dark gray jeans and inspects them. “These would probably look really cute on you, Camila.”

“Yeah?” Camila asks, then nods in approval to herself after examining them because they’re definitely her style.

“What do you think, Lauren?” Camila spins around to ask the girl but is met with nothing but an empty space that Lauren had previously been occupying. “Where did Lauren go?”

Ally only glances up briefly before resuming her search. “Oh, don’t worry about her. She always disappears while we’re shopping.”

Camila can’t help but feel a little disappointed that Lauren isn’t with them, but she doesn’t want to come across as obsessed with the girl (she’s not obsessed, okay Dinah?), so instead she opts to finish helping Ally out.

Finally finding a pair of white washed jeans she likes, Ally leads the way to the dressing rooms to try them on and ensure that they fit correctly. Camila waits around the corner at the entrance to the changing area, promising to tell Ally how the pants look on her. She can’t see any of the dressing room doors because they’re all hidden behind a wall, but Camila definitely hears the muffled Lauren? Ally lets out.

She can’t make out any of what Lauren is saying because the girl is speaking too quietly, but she does pick up bits and pieces of Ally’s voice.

“What […] trying on?”

“I didn’t know […] stuff like that.”

“[…] very different […] usual clothes […]”

“[…] your closet?”

“Calm down. […] won’t tell […]”

Suddenly it dawns on Camila that she is very inappropriately eavesdropping on a private conversation. Pulling her phone out, she deliberately ignores their hushed voices and tries to distract herself by checking Instagram.

A couple of minutes pass before Ally appears wearing her new jeans, calling Camila’s name to get her attention.

“What do you think?”

Gesturing with her hand for Ally to spin around, Camila nods in approval before offering a genuine smile to the girl. “I love them. They look good on you.”

“Thanks, Mila,” Ally says with a grin, disappearing behind the wall to head back to her changing room.

It’s only a few moments later when Lauren emerges from around the corner, stopping in her tracks when she sees Camila standing near the exit. She doesn’t miss the way Lauren hides whatever she’s holding behind her back.

“Oh hey, Lauren, I didn’t know you were in here. Did you try something on?” Camila is honestly just amused at how flustered Lauren looks, so yeah, she’s being a little shit.

“Um, uh, yeah– I uh, it didn’t, uh, fit so I just… um, I’m not going to– you know, uh, I’ll just go p– put it back.” The way Lauren is stuttering and nervously rocking on her heels has Camila feeling a little bad for teasing the girl.

“Alright. You do that. I’ll just stay here and wait for Ally.”

Camila doesn’t move from her spot near the entrance and laughs slightly to herself at how Lauren tries her very hardest to make sure that whatever she’s holding stays hidden behind her back, even when she goes to pass Camila.

While Camila does stay near the changing rooms to wait for Ally, she also watches as Lauren inconspicuously (not really) heads over to the registers to purchase whatever she’s trying so hard to hide. Camila wonders why it is that Lauren is so shy about it, because based on the girl’s wardrobe it’s probably just another skirt or adorable blouse or something. That’s the extent of Lauren’s style that everybody in school already knows about, so unless it’s something different and not Lauren, Camila doesn’t really understand the girl’s behavior.

~~

Camila hates wasting her lunch period by using the bathroom, especially since the juniors got the worst time slot this year (she knows the juniors get the worst lunch time and the seniors get the best one, so she can’t wait for next year), but she’s about to burst so she sucks it up and heads to the nearest restroom. She’ll be a little late to lunch, but at least the bathroom she’s near is one of the few that’s usually empty so she’ll most likely have it to herself.

When Camila pulls open the door, she’s surprised to see that someone’s already in there. Green eyes whip up to her as she enters the restroom, and Camila smiles at how cute Lauren looks (she always looks cute) with her fishtail braid and her startled expression.

“Hey, Lauren,” Camila greets with a wide smile. Only then does she notice that the front of Lauren’s shirt is stained and damp and the girl is clutching a wet paper towel in one hand.

“Are you okay?”

“Uh, yeah, uh huh, I’m fine,” Lauren says quickly.

“What happened?” Camila asks as she walks closer to Lauren.

“N– nothing, don’t worry. Aus– I mean someone, just uh, accidentally walked into me in the hallways, and, um, spilled their soda on my shirt. But… it was my fault really. I– I wasn’t looking where I was going.”

Camila narrows her eyes at the girl, because something tells her that the girl is not being completely truthful. She doesn’t question Lauren, however, because she doesn’t think that they’re on that level of friendship. They’re barely acquaintances.

“Well, I don’t think that stain is coming out until you throw it in the wash.”

Lauren doesn’t reply, just shrugs sadly as she continues to wipe vigorously with the paper towel.

“Do you have a change of clothes?” Camila continues, stepping closer. 

Pausing her wiping, Lauren gazes up at Camila with her lips in a pout and her brows furrowed, a dejected look on her face. “No,” she mumbles almost embarrassedly.

Forgetting her need to pee, Camila suddenly gets an idea and begins making her way towards the exit. “I left a shirt at Mani’s the other day and she returned it to me this morning. You can just borrow that!”

“No– that's– Camila I–”

Camila just waves Lauren’s protests off, already pushing through the doorway. She sprints down the hallways to her locker to retrieve the shirt and returns to Lauren in record time.

“Here,” Camila says, breathing harder through her nostrils. “Don’t worry, it’s clean, and Mani’s laundry detergent always smells really good.”

“Camila, you–”

“Put it on. Really, it’s no big deal.” She grins at Lauren, stretching her arm out further towards the girl.

Hesitating for a moment, Lauren bites her lip before taking the shirt. “O– okay, I’ll uh… try it on,” Lauren relents, tossing the paper towel away and heading into the nearest stall.

It takes nearly a full minute before the door opens again and Lauren walks out, gripping her ruined top in one hand and pulling at the hem of Camila’s shirt with the other.

“Sorry,” Camila laughs lightly. “I probably should have realized that we’re not the same size.”

They’re not too far off in size, but the shirt is a little small on Lauren. It’s snug around her shoulders, and it’s obvious that Lauren has a bigger chest than Camila because it stretches tightly across her breasts. Whenever Camila would raise her arms while wearing it, the shirt would rise up a little. With Lauren, the girl has her arms down by her side but the top is still a little short, and Camila can see her belly button peeking out.

“I just…” Lauren begins, breaking into Camila’s thoughts (as if she wasn’t already in there). “I guess I’m not that used to feeling so, uh, uncovered.”

Smiling softly at Lauren, Camila walks forwards, reaching to tug gently at the shirt and smooth out non-existent wrinkles.

“You look great in it, Lauren. And hey, it even matches your skirt.”

Camila grins at Lauren through the mirror, subtly admiring the girl’s body while Lauren examines herself in the reflection.

“You know I wouldn’t lie to you, right?” Camila asks, squeezing Lauren’s side once before stepping away and putting some distance between the two.

Turning to face Camila, Lauren timidly runs a hand through her hair. “You really mean it? That I look okay in it?”

“More than okay,” Camila replies immediately. “You look stunning. But… I mean… you always do so…” Camila trails off, grinning cheekily at the girl.

Her heart flutters at Lauren’s flushed cheeks, then skips a beat when the girl adjusts her crooked glasses (probably tousled from changing shirts).

Camila rubs at the lone tattoo on her right arm and notices how Lauren’s eyes lock onto the movement. 

“Okay,” Lauren says, looking back up.

“Okay?”

“Okay.” Lauren nods to reinforce her words.

“Okay,” Camila repeats goofily one more time, smiling widely at Lauren’s adorable giggle.

They step around each other, Lauren to exit and Camila to pee. As Lauren is about to leave, Camila calls her name.

“Yeah?” she asks, one hand on the door, the other clutching her ruined top.

“Keep the shirt. It looks better on you than it ever did on me.”

Camila walks into her stall before Lauren can protest, but she doesn���t miss the pink cheeks and happy smile on the girl’s face.

~~

After browsing the shop a little longer, Ally and Camila eventually make their purchases and the three begin to leave the store. They just make it to the entrance when a familiar face appears.

“Hey guys,” Zayn greets happily. “Shawn told me you three were here.”

Camila can’t help but scowl slightly, because there goes her time with Lauren. Zayn is here to inevitably swoop the girl off of her feet and make her forget all about Camila.

“Hi, Zayn,” Lauren returns. She offers him a little wave, and just as Camila is about to accept defeat, Lauren surprises her by grabbing her hand, clutching the strap of the purse she wore today with the other. Camila ducks her head because she doesn’t want anyone to see how widely she’s grinning or how much she enjoys the warmth of Lauren’s skin on her own.

“We were just heading out, actually,” Camila says, not even mad at Zayn anymore because Lauren is still standing next to her, taking the initiative to hold her hand, and literally nothing else matters.

Zayn shrugs, turning to walk back out of the store with them. “That’s fine. I was here last week so I probably shouldn’t be buying any more stuff anyways.”

As they stroll through the mall, Zayn making conversation with Ally while Camila and Lauren trail behind, hand in hand, Camila thinks back to her earlier talk with Normani and Dinah.

They encouraged her to be honest with Zayn about her crush on Lauren, and Camila wishes she had thought about doing that earlier. She figures it’s better to get it done sooner rather than later, so offering a comforting squeeze to Lauren’s hand, Camila turns to the girl with a smile.

“I have to go talk to Zayn about something. Mind if you walk with Ally for a bit?”

“Oh, sure,” Lauren says as she looks at Camila. Her eyes seem extra bright today, and Camila just really wants to kiss her.

They pick up the pace to catch up with Zayn and Ally and switch partners after Lauren cuddles up to Ally and Camila pulls Zayn to the side a little.

“What’s up?” he asks with a serious expression. “Is everything alright?”

Camila takes a deep breath, unsure of how she’s going to word everything. “So… I know you and Lauren have gotten kind of close since we started hanging out with them. I wanted to know… um… do you like her?”

Furrowing his eyebrows, Zayn gazes down at Camila. “How did you know?”

Camila feels her heart drop, because fuck, she’s too late. They already have feelings for each other.

He doesn’t notice Camila’s reaction. “Well, okay I don’t like like her yet, but I definitely have a crush on her.”

“Oh,” Camila mumbles, because she’s not sure what to do with that information.

“Why, what’s up? Do you like her or something?”

Looking down, Camila stays silent. Why does it matter? Zayn is one step ahead of her anyways.

Stopping them in their tracks, Zayn places both hands on her shoulders and directs her eyes to him. “Shit, you like Lauren?”

Camila shrugs sadly but nods anyways. She feels a little embarrassed now, because of course if they both had a crush on the same person, Zayn would most likely win every time.

“Mila, I… I had no idea. How long?”

“Um, since, uh, freshman year,” she admits quietly.

“The fuck? Why didn’t you tell me?” And wait, what? “I was making moves on Lauren because I didn’t think anyone else was into her. If I had known you liked her, I would have never even started. Fuck, I feel like such an asshole now.” He starts pacing in front of her, his hand on his forehead.

“Hold on, you… what?”

Pausing his walking and looking at her, Zayn quirks an eyebrow in amusement. “You’ve liked her for that long and you really think I’m going to try anything? Fuck no. All this time I could have been your wingman. You should have told me.”

“I– what– you… for real?” Camila stutters out.

“Duh,” he says, tossing an arm around her to continue walking after the other two. “I kind of had an idea because you were always looking at her in the hallways and commenting on how cute she looks and how her hair looks so soft and those glasses are adorable.“ She reaches out to lightly smack him on the stomach which he just chuckles softly at. "I’m not going to get in your way. You want to be with her, right?”

Camila watches Lauren walking in the distance, laughing and joking with Ally. “So fucking badly.”

“Well then,” he says, pulling her closer. “Let’s go get your girl.”

~~

check me out on wattpad