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somewhereincairparavel · 8 months ago
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"jason is a knockoff watered down percy" NO hear me out, jason actually parallels annabeth immensely, sharing SO many similarities with her personality, not percy, in this essay I will-
edit: my full analysis is out now! here
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haztory · 2 months ago
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where you are.
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— continuation to bias. (yes, i am making a series. yes, i am making us work for it) — jack abbot x fellow f!reader; attending/fellow dynamic, age-gap (unspecified but reader is late 20s and up, jack is mid 40s), heavy plot, slow-burn, angst, mention of patient death, gore, medical descriptions, descriptions of c-sections and premature birth, medical inaccuracies, jack and city girl being a formidable unit together in the ER then a LONG stint of pining, yearning, and embracing of domesticity, these two taking care of each other without realizing, please heed the warnings there are descriptions of invasive and traumatic birth — word count: 4.5k — summary: The sight of you instills a relief akin to a cool splash of water on Abbot—something he notes and stores on the shelf of things to deal with later. A shelf that is starting to pile up these days with things he’s avoiding. Things that all, concerningly, relate to you.
masterlist
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The night had been going fine up until this point. Maybe it was that faulty line of thinking that led to this. The sudden implosion, the shatter of the steady. 
Jack isn’t one to brag much about himself. There’s no grand honor in being a doctor. Private practice, sure. Maybe. In the ED, it's shit work in shit situations where actual shit may or may not be involved. He’ll tell that to anyone who asks. When the inevitable question comes—are you any good at it?—he’ll shrug and tell them, depends on the day. 
He’s seen enough, done enough, worked with little more than two plastic straws and a boning knife to do a crike in the middle of a firefight in Afghanistan. He knows his way around the block, and can do more than the average ED can—that he will admit. But it's still a shit job sometimes. 
He hates all of the tragedy that rolls through the doors. They all eat away at the sinews of the mortal coil, but pregnant traumas? They get to him. It’s unsteady ground, the one type of call that he’s always shown a physical reticence to handling. 
There’s too much variability, too many unsuspecting errors, too much divided attention in the multidisciplinary approaches where focus has to be split for the sake of mom and baby. Crack open a body and you’re in for a world of hurt. Throw pregnancy into the mix, and now you’re one step away from God’s door asking what kind of games he’s playing. 
Aching despair is wedged in each part of an obstetric trauma that makes someone as battle tested and weathered as Dr. Jack Abbot sweat and cringe with a grief too profound for words. 
They wheel the young woman into Trauma One and the adrenaline surges through him like a needle straight to veins. His eyes, cold and hurried, press into Lisa. A terse instruction is barked out, your name in his lips.
“Get her in here now.”
Lisa is quick on her feet, stepping out of the OR to find you just as he cuts open the young girl’s shirt. In his survey of her body—the distended stomach dark with bruising from her injuries, blood staining every part of her body, most notably her inner thighs—his eyes find her face, shining a light in her eyes. 
The pupils remain unilaterally fixed in their dilation, non reactive. And it’s then that he notices how much of a child she looks. 
The sudden slam of the trauma doors welcomes you into the room, a rush in your step as you tie the surgical gown behind your back. A readied focus on your eye. The sight of you instills a relief akin to a cool splash of water on Abbot—something he notes and stores on the shelf of things to deal with later. A shelf that is starting to pile up these days with things he’s avoiding. Things that all, concerningly, relate to you. 
“Tell me.”
A resident presents with speedy construction as Jack oversees the tracheostomy. Young female ejected from an MVC, tachycardic, extensive blood loss and apparent extreme cardiovascular collapse and hypoxia. Non reactive pupils indicating neurological nerve damage. EMTs conducted an ultrasound to confirm pregnancy and baby’s length at 30 weeks. Dr. Hudson, the OB-GYN specialist, is on the phone, her own hands wrapped up in an emergency delivery upstairs, asking for details just as they’re presenting them to you. But there’s value in having you in the room—you’ve told Abbot enough about your New York residency. He knows just how much knowledge you have in obstetrics for this. 
The decision is made by you without further delay. Sure and serious. 
“We’re getting this baby out, now.” Your suggestion meets no rebuttal from Dr. Hudson over the line.
“CT has been ordered, we’re next in line.” Dr. Basu, the attending surgeon, speaks from the side of the bed.
“For it to confirm what we already know and waste more time?” You explain, not meanly. Just direct, intense. “We’ve got vaginal bleeding, likely dealing with placental abruption and the longer we wait, the longer the baby is not getting oxygen. We get this baby out now or we lose both of them.”
Dr. Hudson’s voice rings on the other end of the line, “I agree. Keep me updated.”
Abbot’s a good soldier, takes direction without problem. He’s heard your directive loud and clear, the specialist’s agreement is just icing on the cake. 
“You heard them. Let's move.”
You fall beside him in perfect time, meeting his movements quickly as skin is cut, hands move, and a baby—small, pink, and too pure for how he’s born—is introduced to the world. 
The baby is passed to a resident for care, a separate team filling up the connecting OR to secure baby boy before getting him up to NICU. Your attention remains fixed on attempting to stabilize mom, or at least getting her stable enough to be put on life support so that her family can see her and make the call. Jack is by your side, equally intent as you. Grounds his feet to the floor, keeps himself firm as you speak directions to one another, pass steady compliments at performance, grit out expletives of frustration.
Intent to share in the dread of this one. 
It’s not going well. The injuries are so severe, compounding on each other that right when you think you get something halfway resolved, another crash of vitals sounds through incessant beeping. 
He says your name softly, an hour and fifteen minutes into the procedure, after her pulse is lost for the third time and three units of O-Pos have been pumped through her. A gentle echo in the orchestra of chaotic beeps. You look at him, blood staining your forearms, sweat beading on both of your foreheads, the dismay creasing on your face mirrored on his own. 
“Anything else you want to try?” He asks. It’s not a test of knowledge, a sudden pop-quiz from your attending, but true deference. 
You hardly imagine he’s had to do many emergency c-sections on the floor, much less when he was on the field, but seeing the monolith of a man equally lost like you is hard hitting. You shake your head, tired.
“Call it.” He gently issues.
“Time of death, 3:07.” The words heave out of your mouth in a shuddered breath. It’s through shot nerves and sheer adrenaline that your hands shakily pull the bloodied gloves off of them. You toss them to the floor in defeat as the respiratory therapist stops her manually pumping of the bag valve mask and Lisa shuts off the monitors. 
It’s the same punch to the gut every time the words are uttered. You still struggle to get used to it.
“Thank you all for your work on this one.” Jack says to everyone in the room. The team seems to deflate at his words, solemnity a gaseous cloud that poisons the crowd. 
“Let’s take a moment and honor her and the life that was here.”
It’s a tense and desolate moment of silence. They always are. It’s broken by the sound of the sneakers in the hallway and the opening of the operating doors. 
“Dr. Abbot—” Bridget’s whisper stirs the room, “Your patient in two is vomiting.”
That’s all that can be afforded. The room breaks, everyone filtering out as the world continues to revolve beyond this room. As everyone makes out for the doors, he notices you stay. Staring. Reviewing. 
Going through it all over, and over, and over again. 
“We did everything we could.” He calls to you, ritualistically. Because it’s the right thing to say, not necessarily the one he believes.
“I know.” You tell him, because it’s true, but not because you believe it. You stay focused on the girl’s face, childlike features marred with contusions. “I just want a moment.”
“Course.” He offers quietly, “Anything you need.”
Your lips tilt at the shared mantra, a settled phrase that you find each other saying more often these days. You nod, appreciatively at him, your blessing for him to take his leave. Still, he hesitates. Holds. Waits. Staying close in case you voice a need—in case you say you need him. 
He forces himself out of the room before he makes a fool of himself. 
Abbot finds you in the aftermath. When a clean blanket is covering the girl's face, and she’s been wiped of the blood and fluids, and moved to an observation room waiting for her family’s arrival. After you both have moved forward through the night in other cases. He finds you outside of the vending machine, your gaze stuck flicking between the number of options.
“You’re supposed to put money into the machine in order to get something out.”
The sound of his voice hardly surprises you, even from behind. Almost like you anticipate him throughout the night, expect to find him somewhere nearby—these days, you practically hear him in the swirl of your own thoughts. Guiding you, teasing you, comforting you. 
“I’m fighting a battle against the urge to gorge on chocolate.” You tell him succinctly, eyeing the trail mix hesitantly.
“How’s that going?”
“I’m losing.”
He huffs a breath then pulls out his card from his wallet. He steps up behind you, close enough where his chest brushes your shoulder as he reaches around and taps it against the machine's card reader. You don’t move from the innocent meeting of your bodies, out of some curious interest in seeing if he will. 
He doesn’t. You shove the desire to lean into his subtle touch with a ten-foot pole, beating it until it's nonexistent. 
He punches in ‘B6’ on the keypad without hesitation and watches as a Snickers bar is dropped from the rack. He bends down, reaching his hand through the slot and raises back up with a grunt, handing the chocolate bar to you.
Your stare is scolding, but you take the bar anyway. Ripping the wrapper and taking a bite of the candy. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“Cushion before the blow.” He warns. Your chewing slows, eyes widening in dread at him.
“Our pregnant mom’s parents are here.” Jack explains and you sigh heavily. “She was sixteen.”
Solemnly nodding, your eyes find comfort in fixating on the tile floor. “We have her name?”
“Kerina Jackson.”
“Okay. I’ll head over now.”
“You want me in there?”
“No. I made the call, I can do it.”
“I don’t mind.”
He watches you think for a moment. Weighing the pros and cons of it all, before you meet his gaze. Looking into him as if searching for any insincerity or any indication that he might take your acceptance as weakness. 
Finding nothing, you nod slowly. “Yeah, okay. Please.”
The walk to the observation room is harrowing. Your candy lays half eaten in your hand before you eventually tuck it into your pocket, appetite lost. You both convene one final look at each other at the door—a quick check-in, an agreement to step in before doing so. Jack moves, his hand on the handle of the door and holds it open for you, following in after you. 
You speak first, introducing the both of you to the parents as the doctors responsible for overseeing their daughter. They hang onto your words with fevered worry. You tell them the outcome as softly as you can. Life shatters for them in an instant. 
Through their heaves and sobs, you manage to croak out. “The baby is stable, for now. He’s been sent up to NICU for care. One of our nurses can take you to go see him.”
“And our daughter, where is she?” Her father asks. 
Jack speaks then, “We have her ready for you in an observation room. You can see her whenever you’d like.”
“I speak for Dr. Abbot and I when I say that we are so sorry that this has happened.” You continue. They ask a few questions—what killed her? Severe blood loss. Blunt force trauma. How long were you operating on her? An hour and fifteen minutes. Are you sure you did everything you could? No. But that part stays quiet. 
The room descends in a choked mood. Tempered by the soft sobs to two mourning parents who have no questions to ask but to the God that decided to take their child. 
“We will be here for any other questions you have or help you may need.” Jack speaks amidst the tears. There’s gratitude at his insertion as you find yourself at a loss of what else to say. But Jack knows. He always knows. “If you let one of our nurses know, they’ll come get us.” 
His hand rests on the small of your back as he guides you both out of the room. It’s a welcome feeling, a steady rock on shaky ground. As soon as the touch is there, it’s gone. He’s rounding on you, staring intently into you. 
“You good?”
“No.” You shrug. “You?”
He crosses his arms, tendons in his forearms stretching for a moment as he opens and closes his palms. For a moment you see the sliver of the man—the one that is becoming more and more familiar to you. That he’s revealing slowly, a new crack into the armor each time you happen to be around when these things happen. Weary and upset in a way that stretches beyond anger at the unfairness of life. Targeted almost in judgement, in disappointment at choices—his and beyond. 
It touches depths of sadness and hurt in ways that he doesn’t often let show. Visible only in the slow nod of his head and the downturn curl of the corner of his lips. 
A slew of questions sits in his mind—What was she doing out on the road so late? What did she run into? Why wasn’t she wearing her seatbelt? Why the fuck was she pregnant at sixteen? Each is more devastating than the last, sticking a knife into his back and drags down, down, down the seam of his skin until he feels like he’s split into two.
His leg aches, loudly, but admitting that is forsaking a life that this young girl doesn’t get to have anymore. 
“Gotta keep going.” He says, plainly. But his lips curl downward and his stare says more than he thinks it does.  
Your fingers itch to grab onto him and hold him tight.
The sun rises slowly and with it comes the harrowing end of the shift. It couldn’t have come sooner.
You should run—make for the streets of Pittsburgh and never turn back. Let your heart race in adrenaline from something other than tragic chaos. Run for nonexistent hills that whisper a promise of calm and levied bliss as you leave PTMC and all that it holds. It’s an amusing thought. If you were stronger, more committed, you would. But the clock ticks past your scheduled exit time, your bag slung over your shoulder and yet, your feet remain firmly planted to the ground at the loading bay. Stuck, held, waiting. For something.
A sign, maybe. A reminder of why you’re here. 
“I need a beer.” 
Much like he’s done all night, Jack sidles up beside you. Appearing out of thin air and standing next to you. You’re brows furrow in question, having thought he had made for the rooftop like he usually does after a long shift. 
“Isn’t it too early for that?” You ask. 
“Never too early for a good thing.” He shrugs. “Isn’t that a ‘city that never sleeps’ specialty?” 
“Touché.” You nod in concession. Silence befalls the two of you as the world sounds around you. Cars drive by as people wake up, sirens from an ambulance ring only a hair’s width away. The air is cool on your skin and you take the moment to breathe. The urge to run wanes, slightly. 
“I’ve got some beer at my place.” You offer, casually. “Wanna head that way?”
Jack turns to meet your gaze. It's an innocuous invitation, smeared with exhaustion and nonchalance. Nothing untoward. Like you wouldn’t be offended if he didn’t take you up on it, just as you wouldn’t make it a big deal if he did. Your thumb points south, gesturing to your apartment, the complete opposite direction of his home. 
He tilts his head after a thoughtful moment of consideration. “You take the train?”
“Bus.”
“Fuck that. I’ll drive us.”
— 
Your apartment is deep in the strongarm of the city, right at the crossing between loud and hectic, and just past the Allegheny River. The building is as quaint as it is quiet, which isn’t saying much. A big, tall eyesore and Jack can’t help but scoff. 
City girl staying close to what she knows.
He follows, woefully out of his element, as you guide him past the concierge and through the modern and minimalist decor of the lobby into golden elevators. You press twelve on the buttons and the elevator ascends in a quiet hum—lulled only by the whir of the machine. 
Comfortable silence emphasizes the line that’s been drawn in the sand. Work staying at the steps of the hospital, far from a desirable topic of conversation, even farther from being a worthy disruption of the tranquility. Rehashing the night, wondering what could have been done differently is a task you both save for personal time in the privacy of your spaces when no one else is looking. 
“Bienvenido a mi casita.” You sing, tired and a feeble attempt at jovial, as your keys unlock the apartment door. 1224, he notes. Puts it up on the crowded shelf with everything else about you he pretends he isn’t storing. He steps inside, eyes scanning the home with barely concealed interest. 
It’s a small space, clean—save for the mail you have scattered on the counter and the stray bottle of cleaner that you have yet to put away. The apartment is decorated modestly, color popping in the pillows on your couch, the rug you have in the living room, the dinner mats on your two-chaired dinner table. Photos of friends, family, your nieces hang on every wall in a pleasant array. It’s lived in, alive, warm, yours.
He doesn’t realize he’s studying the place until you call from behind him from the kitchen, your head deep in the pantry. “You still want that beer? I can make some coffee instead?”
“Coffee’s good. Bl—”
“Black. I know.” You look at him over your shoulder, a twinkle somehow emerging in your eyes. From the ash of a smoldering fire that burned all that was sane, you still rise—sparking anew.  He watches, curious. You grab coffee grounds and move through your kitchen, filling the machine and starting a brew. 
“You hungry?” You ask. 
“Are you?”
“I could eat.” 
He didn’t come here to eat breakfast. He’s not sure why he even came in the first place. But he nods despite the uncertainty that makes him feel idiotic. “Sure.”
He wades awkwardly into your apartment. Unsure where to stand, how to take up less space, if he should bid his goodbye now or later. His eyes fall to a box leaning against your living room wall, beside your television that sits pathetically on the floor. 
“What’s going on here?” He asks, gesturing to the cardboard with black lettering that has too many umlauts above them. 
“A TV stand that I’ve been procrastinating building.” You respond, the sound of eggs cracking on the counter and into a bowl ringing throughout the room. 
“How long?”
“‘bout a month.”
“Christ.” He scoffs. “You waiting for God to show up?
“Something like that.” He hums. His eyes narrow for a moment, before deciding resolutely. 
“Got a tool kit?”
The morning unfolds slowly, comfortably. Jack sitting in your living room, building your TV stand to create a reason as to why he’s here. He pauses only when you plate up some breakfast. Eggs, toast, and a cup of coffee. He eats in a steady quiet with you, unsure when the last time he had breakfast with someone was.
Conversations are interspersed infrequently. Mostly unimportant; something about this new hot sauce you got from the farmer’s market and the plans you have for redecorating. He tells a stupid story about the billboard outside your apartment window that used to have the picture of the two twin lawyers and their fish man.
(“Their fish man?”
“Shenderovich, Shenderovich, and Fishman. 1-888-98-Twins.”
“Shenderovich to the second power. God, that’s awful.”
“You’re telling me.”)
Quiet things, small delights that bring the slight quirk to his lips and the gentle huff of laughter from you. The small things the diffuse the tension of the night, that force the slow revival into becoming a human again.
You take both plates when you finish, humming at his quiet thanks and returning to the kitchen to clean while he returns his attention to the stand. And it’s normal—so pointedly normal and domestic it’s a wonder this hasn’t been a routine occurrence. Jack is sore thumb in his scrubs sitting on your living room floor, your measly excuse for a toolkit beside him as he fits wooden slabs together and builds. An entirely new sight, certainly not something the version of you a few months ago would’ve thought you’d ever see, but it's a welcome one. 
Weirdly, he fits. His figure, his presence, him. Makes your home feel whole, meaningful.
Time passes with little recognition. It’s a relatively simple stand—easy and mindless to put together. The Swedes are built off of functional efficiency and he sends a quiet hail mary to the Scandinavians. One moment, Jack is scanning the instructions, his eyes glancing to yours as you place a glass of water beside his mug on the coffee table next to him. Then he blinks and the stand is assembled, only the quiet hum of the morning news sounding from your television. 
It’s a welcome thing. He’s never able to fully turn his mind off but in the mundane, the easy turn of the screw and the pleasing click of pieces together, the turmoil dulls to a quiet chatter and he can breathe easily. Zoned in so readily that he lost touch with reality for a second. Forgot where he was, what he was doing, who he was doing it for. 
He pushes the stand into the place where your TV sits on the ground, then lifts the TV onto its surface. Settling the furniture into the place that he supposes you would want—the place he thinks it looks best. 
He’s turning, content at being useful and ready to ask for your approval. Then he realizes that he’s heard very little from you while he was building.
He finds you on the couch behind him. Eyes shut, mouth slightly open as your breaths are softly and evenly exhaled in your sleep. Your hair is released from the tie you had to hold it back throughout the shift, the strands messily framing your face as you lay against the pillow of the couch. Still clad in your scrubs, your face settles peacefully as you rest. Not scrunched in frustration or stony in your focus. 
Under the soft of the morning light, a sharp contrast to the fluorescents he’s always seen you under, exhaustion resounds on your face. Tamed only by the sweetened sighs of your slumber that remedy the ailment. You sleep, sweet and easy.
A stray strand of hair crosses over your nose, moving with the rhythmic rise and falls of your breaths. A twitch aches in his fingers. Spurned by need and the deep rooted ache of loneliness that craves the taste of tenderness. 
He brushes the strand away from your face, eyes focused on the action, watching your face remain peacefully asleep. Relishes in the brief moment of softness he’s been afforded. 
There’s a twinge of guilt as he has to disturb the solitude, yours and his, when he taps your leg gently. You stir in tired confusion.
“Lock the door behind me.”
“You’re going?” You ask, wiping your mouth, sounding disappointed at the notion. 
“Yeah. You need to sleep.”
“You sure? You can stay.”
The excuse is on his tongue fighting against the urge to read into that. There was hardly a reason for him to be here today, much less one for him to linger around. Insist and bore drill into the cracks of his thick skull that this shouldn’t happen again. That this is inappropriate. 
It’s pointedly not, though. He built a stand for you, you made him breakfast. That was all there was to it. That’s all that was being expected by you, because why would you expect anything further?
(You wouldn’t. Because there’s nothing going on. Despite the stares from the nurses, and the whispers of a rumored bet, and the lingering glances that get sent between you two—nothing is going on.
He’s sure of it.)
But, Jack doesn’t do things flippantly, without purpose. And walls don’t get torn down, softened, for just any reason. In the ingrained pattern that Dr. Mott insists is a defense mechanism and that Jack believes is just normal human condition, he feels the walls so carefully erected find their place once more. Fortified to shut out the possibility of some inane want for something burn without restraint within him. 
The armor that’s been slowly cracking back settles onto him and he aims for a neutral expression. Curt, succinct. No room for error. “Thanks for breakfast.” 
“Thanks for the stand, you didn’t have to do that. But it looks great.” You trail behind him slowly as he walks towards your front door. “I’ll be calling you for all of my furniture builds. I’m spoiled now, old man.”
Here’s the chance. Stop it here, smother the budding growth of a tender seed before it takes root and spreads into his lungs. Prevent the tendons from reaching up his throat, crawling into his brain, and mold the perfect image of you into the grey matter. 
He should tell you, firmly, that this will not happen again. Throw in a degrading tease, diffuse the sincerity of the moment. Get you to stop looking at him like he means something.
“Anytime, city girl.” He says, instead. 
You smile— warm, relaxed, gentle and he’s ready to aim gun to temple at the realization of how much he likes it. He can only do what he knows best, what he does with everything else he stupidly seems to notice and grab onto with you, and puts it on the shelf. Half ready to lock it in a chest deep in his mind and toss the key into a cavernous abyss. 
“I’ll hold you to it.” You say, content. And he nods.
He drives back in silence and the promise forged in tired smiles and quiet closeness chokes him all the way home.
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a/n: i would like it known, this is the fastest i have ever put out work in a series. im just so bewitched by this middle aged man, i want him inside me.
know this is a quick one and not much happens but i'm a true believer in slow burn being both slow and burning :)
next one will be fun, promise!
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danielnelsen · 2 years ago
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while i get where this comes from and it’s true to an extent, i reeeaaaally don’t like how people try to explain “trans men don’t [necessarily] have male privilege” with things like “some trans men don’t pass”.
like sure that’s the most obvious example (someone who is seen as a woman won’t have the privilege that comes with being seen a man) but you’re still acting like being a passing trans man is just a free opt-in to male privilege which is………kinda the issue.
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the-hopeful-squid · 8 days ago
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"S3 is a good ending! It's realistic that heroes never win and The System is too big to ever truly be defeated!"
Look, even setting aside the issue of whether or not the whole, "Heroes will lose if they try too hard to change the system, and bad guys who work the system to their benefit always win," is realistic (spoiler: it's not! the world has changed about a zillion times already over the course of human history! and plenty of those changes were for the better! it can and will change again towards better things before human history is over!)-
If you expect me to believe that a young woman could give birth to a healthy premature baby in like five minutes in the middle of a death game full of people trying to hunt down and murder each other, that the woman could then live through that death game and into another one while carting her baby around with her before dying, and that the baby could be carted around alive through two more death games by a guy who last held a baby almost 15 years ago and still be alive and reasonably healthy at the end-
Then I don't know where anyone gets off claiming that it would be too unrealistic to also have the main hero win, survive, and bring a few other people out of those stupid death games alive, too.
Symbolism! Metaphors! Hope for the future through even the darkest of times!
Oh. So it wasn't about absolute Realism? Great! Then you can have all the above in a show where the hero also lives, defeats the games, and saves a few other people who held onto their own hope and kindness and fighting spirit on the way, too.
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mensahbots · 1 month ago
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compilation of mensah moments i liked a whole lot in episode 5
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nerpahead · 2 months ago
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hi heres an idea for a john doe skin that i've been cooking up in my head for a while. don’t know where i can post this so the devs can see it… if someone could let me know how i can show it to them that’d be epic
this is a pretty rough drawing btw sorry i don’t have a lot of motivation rn
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“Character A would never forgive Charcater B for that!!” Okay and.
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umathurwin · 21 days ago
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emery walsh, character analysis
aka rambling thoughts from someone who watched the pitt a single time and doesn't like how everyone speaks about the night shift surgical attending..........
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because walsh only comes into the series at the MCI, i think she's mostly meant to be a personification of the ORs at PTMC. astute viewers may have noticed that during the shooting, there were no issues with any of the operating rooms— there were concerns of timing and triage, as expected, but there were no problems with staffing, resources, fatigue, or further complications from patients sent from the ER. the ORs were perfect. is this realistic? obviously not, i'm sure even people not in healthcare would react to that with a healthy dose of skepticism, but i think it was the right choice for the show. it's an ER show. adding other departments having chaos and conflicts of their own is kind of just putting a hat on a hat
so the ORs are pristine. but how can we depict that, really double down to the viewers that once the ER team passes their patients off to the next step, they're still in good hands? why, you introduce the cool-as-a-cucumber, self confident, resourceful surgical lead. the audience sees this woman stroll in with her hands on her hips and a cheeky quip about needing new people to cut open lest she gets bored, literally physically backing dr. robby up to give her room, and suddenly i'm not so worried about the victims. you know she's the HBIC when garcia clocks out. (edit: actually, she’s the HBIC anyways. garcia looked away when abbot asked for a surgical lead. walsh stepped up. hmmmm) you KNOW the department you will never get to see on screen has things under control
the second part of her characterization is to provide context to mohabbot. that's right, it always comes back to a fifty year old man with me. it's expected that the emergency doctors would be cutting corners during the MCI, but there had to be some point where an individual puts their hand up and is like, wait, ok, i get the circumstances but that's still inappropriate for a doctor to do? without walsh stepping in, the audience could be easily led to believe that this behavior is normal for abbot and the department itself— the episode prior, we had just seen him ultimately commend santos for performing the unsupervised reboa. we had to see someone step in and challenge abbot; otherwise, the pigtail catheter scene loses its weight considering what abbot was pushing samira to do. this is no longer "teehee, ER cowboy and his crazy methods! he always saves the day!", this is now "other attendings are trying to stop him and he's still going. this is meant to be impactful"
you can pitch multiple arguments as to why walsh specifically was chosen for that role and not, say, another ER doctor (i've primarily seen that, as a surgeon, walsh has an expected level of discipline in her workplace that isn't found in the ER and especially not after a shooting) but i don't think it matters who did it or even why. abbotwalsh and mohanwalsh shippers will disagree. but it was a risky procedure that an attending was pushing a resident to perform. most doctors, i think, would take pause, and walsh just happened to be in the room ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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dykedvonte · 7 months ago
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I was rewatching mouthwashing, and I ended up thinking of the different reactions that Curly and Jimmy had in doing their tasks. How during the scene of Anya evaluating Jimmy and showing dread towards the idea of doing his evaluation, Curly was the one that offered to take it off her hands. He had no issue with adding more to his plate, because he knew - or well, thought, he knew that Jimmy wasn't going to "bullshit" with him since he's known him for a long time. When Anya hands Curly a note from Swansea, Curly goes to check out what the issue is and he takes care of it without a complaint, the only "complaint" he has is how this incident could have damaged the pods. Which is reasonable, those pods are their only way to be saved if anything tragic happens on the ship. However, in comparison to Jimmy being asked to do things, he's passive-aggressive about it. When Anya asks Jimmy if he could help her out with Curly's painkillers, he tells her that people should be worth their titles, specifically using her title as a nurse when she asked him for help and then when she says forget it, since he made her feel insecure, he still goes "Oh no, I'LL take care of it" as if he was doing a chore, a favor for her. Then, there's that part where he blows up at her for things that she didn't even ask him to do - more so the others asked him about it, like the code scanner, him deciding he needed to find the axe for the foam, and then, there's the medicine part (which when she does ask, and she reconsiders - going to do it herself, he takes that away from her). Jimmy complains about the tasks he has to do and he treats it like a big issue, a "woes me" that he has to do this and that - wanting the praise of the capital without actually doing any work. While Curly doesn't complain about it, in fact, he even mentions that he's aware of how well he is doing at his job as a Captain during that cockpit scene with him and Jimmy. If Jimmy only had to do a small amount of tasks to get irritated and annoyed at being captain, while Curly didn't which I feel like encapsulates their personalities. Curly understands what he's doing is a job, it's a responsibility, why would he complain at any point for doing what he's suppose too? Why would he be upset at people asking him to do tasks? While Jimmy on the other hand, isn't used to it at all and it's different to what he's had before and he's realizing that he doesn't actually like doing the work he has too. I just wanted to ramble about it even if it seemed kind of obvious xd
It’s obvious but it is a thing people miss or understate when trying to find parallels in Curly’s and Jimmy’s relationship/personalities.
Like the way people portray it as neither taking responsibility when it is almost split down the middle of Curly taking responsibilities and faults that shouldn’t be his and making himself unequipped to handle the ones that are while Jimmy refuses to handle the responsibilities he has because he wasn’t expecting the work that comes with them.
Not a lot to say but people forget that another thing the game comments on is prioritization of issues and responsibilities and how the guys fail at it in one way or another in the situation.
#this talk of responsibility is more so about me be very annoyed with people acting like Swansea was the most responsible man on that ship#when he immediately takes a break after his intern in stuck in the foam starts drinking the moment he find out the mouthwash is alcoholic#doesn’t tell anyone about the cryopod or explain himself and did nothing about Jimmy either until it was too late#like I’m sorry but he is also the last guy I’d like to hear about responsibility from cause he did just as bad as Curly post crash like he#wasn’t even nice to Anya outside the one conversation we see he was actually just as rude to her as he was Daisuke when they cracked open#the crates and dismissive before hand like I’m getting more mad at the glorification of one guy vs the woman whose doing the most 4 herself#like I get his speech and the recognition of his faults but he still had them and they still were his downfall in the end and part of the#reason Daisuke listened to Jimmy and it’s not his fault that happened but it’s the same way it’s not Curly’s fault Jimmy is like that#but I digress cause people don’t exactly like when we actually discuss the responsibilities the crew mates should’ve and shouldn’t have had#or what they actually did to help cause idk Anya likely would not feel supported by any of them after the fact if they survived like girl#only ever got attention for her problems when they were literally at the worst that’s not helping or taking responsibility like she had to#kill herself to feel some sort of relief also the irony about Curly’s concern about killing herself only#for it to get to the point she actually did because there was no safety for her they all failed her#Swansea would’ve just told her to tell the captain and he’d watch Jimmy and ultimately it would play out the same cause he’s tries to not#get to involved cause he’s old and been through enough already and she’d feel just as unheard like he was closer to Daisuke#and not once after the crash did he really try to steer him away from liking Jimmy which again he points out himself#like I love Swansea and Daisuke but they were just as complacent in Anya’s suffering and Jimmy’s behavior even if they knew less that should#not make them more viable options or it more excusable like crazy conclusions to comes to ig on my part but yall hate#the idea that maybe a major point is that Anya was alone as a woman and overlooked#mouthwashing#ask#mouthwashing game#anon#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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geckosteak · 14 days ago
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Per my previous post it is my professional opinion that House is actually does have certified Girl Energy and should be allowed to exist with such. And so here he is in a certified Woman (tm) moment attended to by his ever-faithful companions
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perseabeth · 1 year ago
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These lines by Apollo, aka Lester, live in my mind rent free
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Listen, i have no theory, i have absolutely no idea what is the connection here
ALSO:
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I mean HELLO?? A four-thousand-something years old god saying that. plus i might not be knowledgeable about genetics and how it works but doesn’t percy possess these eyes because of Poseidon ?
this is an extract taken from The Lightening Thief:
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I’ve been a reader of Rick Riordan for so long that i know he doesn’t just add things randomly
I don’t know what’s happening here, but I do know that Estelle Blofis, the very lovable energetic child who is very much capable of dominating the planet (Apollo’s words not mine) might have an important role in the story
but again, who knows
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dailyhtfboards · 3 months ago
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Day 92
Today’s board is:
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Happy 4/20 to all who celebrate it.
(From TV episode 8B, Chew Said a Mouthful)
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dragonroar64 · 8 months ago
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thinking abt pvpciv because of course I am and I feel like pvpciv Evbo is the kinda guy to bring up his traumas as "funny stories"
this would absolutely concern any normal person but I think within the world of pvpciv no one would be concerned by this and would instead be like "haha yeah same thing happened to me a few years back"
this would however be really interesting as a parkciv/pvpciv crossover because parkciv people would be concerned as fuck about this and probably make pvpciv Evbo realize that actually this isn't normal. and if I were a better writer I'd have more words about this but I'm too tired to have better words so woe, angst ideas be upon ye
edited to add: you're legally allowed to reblog this post with your own ideas; doesn't even have to build off of my ideas, but I made this post to see other people's ideas and please remember that if you don't want this post on your blog you're *also* legally allowed to leave a comment!
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ray935sworld · 4 months ago
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I'm gonna hold your hand while I say this - if you think an existing, loved and respected system for somthing should be changed because it could be confusing for new fans I do not think you are aware that you hold the power to literally research every information you get. You can spend literally 1 minute researching the rider and checking their championships on Wikipedia. It's not that hard. It's not much. It's not too much to ask.
When you get into a new sport or field, you will get confused at first. You will read information that was written for an audience already familiar with the subject. You cannot expect people, blogs, journalists, news papers, social media admins, to explain the absolute basics over and over and over again. It would be annoy for them and fans familiar with the subject. (and yes for you too after understanding the system)
Research comes with being interested in new stuff. It's normal. It's part of the learning progress. So do your fucking research. Ask fan who have been into it for longer. Respect the established way and do not demand a change because it's "confusing" just because you don't know how to use the internet and expect that everything is written so you can understand with little to no context.
That's not how this works.
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tvckerwash · 6 months ago
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watching people discover the fucked up science guy part of viktor's lore and then being like "we need to acknowledge that he's a fucked up science guy 😔" is so funny. like yeah, he is a fucked up science guy who thinks ethics committees are bullshit because in his mind having rights temporarily violated is perfectly fine if it means saving lives—especially when the ones condemning his beliefs don't offer what they consider to be an ethical alternative to fix the problem and simply let it continue to exist.
and yeah, he's a fucked up science guy who experimented on himself following a, quote: traumatic period of introspection. he had a mental breakdown, fell into a major depressive episode, and spending this horrible time of his life "alone in the depths" reinforced and radicalized his previous beliefs, and to showcase his beliefs (and to try and get rid of his emotions because of how overwhelming they were) he turned himself into a cyborg (and did in fact make himself worse in certain ways but ehh who cares /j).
and yeah, he's a fucked up science guy who gave a kid back alley anti anxiety meds so he could face down his bullies, but he did so after making him a cozy beverage, teaching him about the dangers of propaganda and baseless rumors, and having him scream into a megaphone to freak out said bullies because it was funny (not that he'd admit to finding it funny because then he'd have to admit to having emotions, and well he can't do that, no sir).
so yes, viktor is a fucked up science guy, but that's half his charm! he cares so much about helping people, but he's a weirdo and freak about it! though to be fair, in the city that also has a chemically enhanced werewolf (warwick), a sentient blob of goo (zac), a wind and water goddess (janna), and a literal war criminal who invented chemical warfare (singed), among many other wacky individuals, he's pretty normal all things considered! fucked up science is just a part of life in zaun, my dudes!
#viktor league of legends#machine herald#uhh those are the only tags I'm doing#still not making a lol tag < is my lol tag#absolutely no hate or offense intended towards anyone bringing up viktor's deeply questionable ethics btw#it's just genuinely a really funny phenomenon to me is all#fr though viktor (and zaun) are meant to represent that dark messy side of science people don't like to acknowledge exists#we would not be where we are today scientifically if it weren't for the people who willingly or unwilling crossed the line#according to a reddit ama the person who wrote viktor’s 2016 lore was directly inspired by the scientists who invented local anesthesia#and tested it on themselves before testing it on patients! obviously what viktor did is just a smidge more extreme than that#but you get the point#he's not evil he's just not exactly mentally well lmao. except the times where he is an evil super villain#95% of the time he should be a weird but otherwise normal guy and the other 5% he should rob banks with his buddies for comedic effect#as zaun is all dark and gritty and deals with complicated complex themes but also it's like a saturday morning cartoon down there#that story from legends of runeterra where viktor takes away all of jinx’s weapons and then gets beat up by vi for it bc she didn't know#that's why the two of them were causing trouble is so fucking funny. just another tuesday am I right?#to be clear I intentionally took a more comedic tone w this post bc I don't have the energy to get into a nuanced discussion of ethics#and discuss the themes of academic elitism mental illness and other stuff in viktor's lore seriously#nor am i particularly knowledgeable of certain aspects that play a part in his lore aka glorious (r)evolution
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starscreamingg · 9 months ago
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Detroit Become Human and why does this game decide that the problem in society is individual people treating androids poorly because those androids are choking them out of the workforce and NOT the corporations and governments who deliberately designed the androids to do this
#AUGHHGHH#I promise you dbh is still one of my favourite games I really do#But ohhhhhhhjghh my GODDDD it makes me mad#Like ESPECIALLY this year. With artists and writers being so fucked by ai#Like the game has less than no sympathy for people who were screwed over by cyberlife deciding their labour wasn't worth anything#Like everybody has to be a strawman. Everybody has to be the violent 'android bad because (some vague reason that draws on the#'immigrants are stealing our jobs' line despite the fact that these things aren't equivalent at all)#Like yes. Robots being placed in positions where a real human would be paid a real wage to do that job is bad. This is a bad thing#But the game. Does not CARE#It's so morally neutral for cyberlife to be allowed to mass produce androids in the middle of a poverty epidemic that they created#It's fine! Says Detroit Become Human because everyone rendered homeless or struggling by this company's actions is a violent drug addict#Or something#It's like HUH#H U H#This game was so enamoured with it's weird bad civil rights allegory that it forgot that people do actually need jobs to uh. Pay to live#Because things are hell#And I think it could've been SO much better if the game acknowledged this AS WELL as acknowledging that no android chose this#Like a fresh deviant didn't ask to cause a real person to not have a job. The company who made them did#But dbh doesn't care. Cyberlife is morally neutral in this. I swear#Loses my mind this game is such a mess#Uhhh if anyone's reading this please don't get mad at me I promise I do really love this game. Like this game is the reason I#Met the love of my life. I am physically incapable of hating this game#I just think it's so worth discussing the ways it fails in (what I think is) a constructive manner#detroit become human#game analysis#I guess#If anyone has any contributions or disagrees with me I would LOVE love to hear. Genuinely I love talking about things like this#Essay in tags
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