#if I’ve just lost all my writing I’m going to SCREAM
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midnightjewel · 2 days ago
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Super Bowl
Obviously, as a girlie from a football family we’re having a Super Bowl party (even though our team hasn’t been since the 90s smfh) my bf is a big eagles fan and as much as I love my girl Tay, I’ve gotta root for the eagles this year! (And keep in mind that as I’m writing this, the game hasn’t even started yet so I know nothing)
So who are they rooting for this year?
Characters Included: Bakugo, Kirishima, Denki, Sero, Shinsou
Bakugo
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- 100% going for the chiefs just to piss Denki off
- He went as far as to buy a jersey just for this game and has been wearing Chiefs merchandise all week just to get a rise out of him
- Truthfully he’s not even a Chiefs fan (I think he’s a Tampa Bay fan) he just wants to make people mad and he’s living for every second of it
- Definitely has a yelling problem when some controversial calls are made that he doesn’t agree with. Not just for the Super Bowl but for any football game that he watches
- I can’t lie he has probably broken something in the dorms before when his team lost
- Probably gets mad (like very mad) when Taylor is shown for two seconds and is earning side eyes from everyone. He probably tweets about it too tbh
- Will probably be getting into a fist fight with Denki tonight after shit talking
If you’re his gf:
- Does not care who you’re going for but if it’s opposite of him you’re not safe from his teasing
- Probably makes you get him a plate of food tbh (weather you do or not is completely up to you)
- If you laugh at him while he’s raging he’ll become more frustrated but tbh it’s so hilarious you can’t stop
Kirishima
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- Chiefs because of his hair (and Tay Tay)
- Definitely bought a jersey like Bakugo but he didn’t do it with the intentions of pissing Denki off he’s just doing it for fun
- Not a regular Chiefs fan either, probably a Miami Dolphins fan
- Honestly loves that Taylor Swift is being incorporated into football because he was a casual listener of hers before but has been recently getting more into her music
- Honestly argues with Bakugo when he yells at the TV for Taylor being shown and they’ve gotten into some pretty heated discussions about it while everyone just sits there awkwardly
- is obsessed with Super Bowl snacks and food, when he’s not sitting on the couch intensely watching, he’s in the kitchen getting a plate of snacks and food (his 5th plate of the night)
- Is hopeful that Kendrick will bring out Taylor for bad blood but knows that it’s not a realistic expectation (is hopeful though)
- Slight chance that he’s wearing a shirt that says “Go Taylor’s Boyfriend” tonight and he is absolutely unashamed about it too
If you’re his gf:
- Respects whoever you want to root for and doesn’t mind friendly competition if it’s opposite of what he chooses
- Probably an accidental mansplainer when it comes to girls and football as if you don’t know what’s going on (he means well I swear)
- Probably asks you if you could get him a drink or something to eat a few times while he’s watching the game but if you don’t want to that’s fine with him! In fact, next commercial break he’s getting you both something from the kitchen
- Never ever is violent about a football game especially not in front of you, if anything he’s the one breaking up fights which you find totally attractive
Denki
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- A die hard Eagles fan (if you know football you’d probably think I’d pick the LA chargers but no a die hard eagles fan)
- Cried when they won in 2018 and cried even harder when they lost in 2023 and it didn’t help that bakugo was absolutely ridiculing him after the Chiefs beat them
- Has been posting things like “it took the avengers two tries to beat Thanos” or something like that referring to the loss of 2023 and tonight
- Definitely has been wearing the merch all week leading up to the Super Bowl. Hats, Scarves, Gloves, Jerseys, Hoodies, SHOES
- Absolutely has a huge Eagles banner in his dorm room
- Has broken a remote before I can’t lie
- The type of person to scream “What the fuck are we doing?!” When his team makes a mistake. And also the type of person to clap really loud and act like an eagle when they score a touchdown
- He will probably be pacing behind the couch tonight (so nervous he can’t even sit down)
If you’re his gf:
- Please (even if you’re not a fan) just root for the Eagles with him, it would mean the world to him
- You ofc know how passionate he is and you always try your best to comfort him if things aren’t going in his favor. Back rubs, reassuring words, bringing him a little snack, etc.
- Will probably pout a bit if you’re going for the opposing team but you’re his queen and he loves you unconditionally no matter how tense the game becomes
Sero
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- Despite the rivalry between his team and the eagles (which has caused some arguments between him and Denki) he’s going for the eagles tonight
- Definitely a Dallas Cowboy’s fan (same) and can’t even defend them anymore
- Probably wants to switch teams but his whole family and himself are too deep into it now with the amount of money spent on merchandise
- He just accepts fate that they regularly suck and hopes that one season he’ll be able to enjoy watching them play
- like I said, due to rivalry he normally HATES the eagles but is making an exception for this game as he is probably a Chiefs hater
- Loves munching on snacks that are brought to the party and will probably tell Bakugo or Denki (or both) to “calm the fuck down” at some point tonight
- Excited for the halftime show and is probably vibing with Shinsou and Kirishima while Bakugo and Kaminari passive aggressively stare at each other in the kitchen while getting food
If you’re his gf:
- You two just snuggle up on the couch and get ready for the shit show between Denki and Bakugo tbh
- Vibes with you during the halftime show and makes sure you’re eating the delicious food that’s been made, he would hate for you to miss out if you’re so invested in the game
- Towards the end you two definitely have to attempt to break up the fist fight between Denki and Bakugo
Shinsou
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- Honestly going for the eagles tonight (and not because Denki wouldn’t leave him alone to pick a side)
- Doesn’t mind the chiefs but I can see him going for the eagles as he sees them as the underdog in this situation tonight
- He’s probably a casual watcher of football but is also probably just a chill Ravens fan or something
- Probably has maybe one jersey or a small poster in his room of the ravens but is a casual fan
- Doesn’t care who wins or loses and he’s honestly just here for the vibes which is a good way to act
- Will casually share his disagreement with a controversial call or two but mostly just sits back and takes it all in
- Tbh is probably still in the common room only because of the halftime show with Kendrick Lamar. Not like us was a song that he may have been hardcore vibing with last year so he’s hopeful that he’ll sing it
- Probably finds is amusing when Denki and Bakugo are almost getting into a fist fight. Probably recording it tbh and just laughing and quietly saying “yo what the fuck” behind the camera while laughing as Bakugo is cackling at Denki being mad and Denki is insulting Bakugo to the point where he stops laughing and they end up slightly fist fighting before being broken up by Sero and Kirishima
If you’re his gf:
- You two are most definitely snuggled together under a blanket awaiting the big show between some of your friends
- Doesn’t care who you’re going for! Eagles? Cool. You guys are definitely matching. Chiefs? That’s fine with him too! There for the food? So is he. There to watch for Taylor? He’s grinning as you happily point out that they’re showing her
- Gently caressing your face as you fall asleep on his shoulder and gets ticked off when the guys wake you up with their loud and unnecessary bickering
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loomiseater · 3 days ago
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You're too good for him
warnings: smut ofc!, oral!f!receiving, cheating, and slight virginity loss.
Criticism is appreciated! I would love to know how I can improve on my writing.
Stu Macher x fem!reader
A/N: Wrote this because I'm so excited for Stu's return and I'm also working a pt 2 to one of my Scream fics.
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Written: February 5th, 2025- February 9th, 2025
Published: February 9th, 2025
Summary: Randy isn't being all that loyal to you..but Stu helps you get over it.
wc: 2,000
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“Oh come on! What’s it gonna take for you to sleep with me one time?!” Stu teasingly asked. We were currently at his house, he threw a party for whatever reason, and the music was so loud. “Stu..we talked about this, I am in a very committed and serious relationship with Randy.” I explained as he rolled his eyes at my statement. 
“So? He doesn’t have to know.” Stu shrugged. I sighed before responding to his stupid statement. “Like I’ve said before, I am not going to-“ Before I could finish, Stu cut me off. “He doesn’t even like you. He’s using you to get close to Sid.” 
My heart dropped..what does he mean? Is Stu joking? If so it’s not funny. “Don’t joke like that, it’s not funny.” I stated. My face was getting hot, I hoped what Stu was saying was some kind of sick joke..but deep down, some part of it feels true. I felt Stu place his arm around me and shift me in the direction of Sidney and Randy laughing with each other and getting all touchy. Randy has never looked at me with that much love before.
“That’s the guy you’re staying loyal for.” He said with a hint of sadness in his voice. It was becoming too much, the air was becoming stuffy, the room was becoming cramped, and tears were flowing down my face. I hurried and ran upstairs to an empty bedroom, slammed the door shut, and placed my face into the pillows. 
Why does this always happen to me? No one ever really likes me, they always like Sid. I know I sound like a jealous and bitter friend, but it’s not fair. For once, I would love it if a boy actually liked me for me but instead they always go for her. 
Maybe I should talk to Sid? What if it’s only a one sided thing? Randy likes her but she doesn’t feel the same way about him? Besides, Sidney is dating Billy so I’m sure she doesn’t feel that way about Randy…I hope. I was still deep in my thoughts until I heard the bedroom door open. It was Stu, he walked in and closed the door behind him. I sniffled and hurriedly wiped my tears.
“I hope you took what I said seriously.” He said before sitting down on the bed. “Uhm- I did, and I decided that I needed to have a talk with Sidney because maybe she doesn’t like Randy in that way and it’s just all one sided and-“ I was rambling on and on as I felt my tears run down my cheeks again. I bursted into tears, I broke down in front of Stu as he held me in his arms. 
“You’re too good for that bozo anyways.” Stu said with head laid on top of mines. It was hard to focus on what he was saying because of his cologne. One thing about Stu is that he always smelled so damn good, after years of our friendship I’ve never been this up close to him. He smelled of some type of wood rainforest musk. 
“Maybe it’s a good thing he’s going after Sid…you need a real man, unlike that pussy.” He scoffed as I sat up out of his arms. I softly chuckled at him before speaking up. “Stu you’re not that much of a man either.” He playfully pointed at him self in shock. “Me?!” “Yes you!” I giggled. Stu’s face now had a soft smile on his face as he scooted closer to me.
My breath hitched as his thumb stroked my cheek. “You could do so much better.” He sincerely said as he looked into my eyes. I always forget how beautiful his bright, piercing blue eyes are. I was so lost in his eyes that I didn’t notice him leaning into me until our lips collided. His lips were soft and plump, his mouth tasted like beer. 
I grabbed his neck and deepened the kiss as he did the same. The kiss was hungry and passionate, nothing I’ve felt with Randy. “Let me show you what a real man is.” Stu lowly said as he pulled away from the kiss and softly pushed me on the bed. It took me a while to realize that this was his bed. His bedroom. 
I was now laid on my back as he slowly sucked on my neck. Soft moans fell from my mouth as I felt him cheesing against my neck. “You like that?” His voice was so seductive and low, it made me so wet. “Mhhm” I hummed as I closed my eyes. He moved away from my neck and was now in between my legs. 
He rubbed my inner thighs softly before asking me a question. “You’re one of the most innocent girls I know, so I know you haven’t done anything-“ I cocked my brow at him. “How do you know I haven’t done anything?” I asked as he gave me a look. “Okay-fine. You’re right, only thing I’ve ever done was kiss..” I was a bit embarrassed. Stu is more experienced than me and I’ve only ever kissed. I guess he could tell from the frown on my face.
“Hey, don’t worry. I won’t be rough.” He said with his charming smile. He gave me one last kiss on my lips before unbuttoning my jeans shorts and pulling them all the way off. I was nervous, my whole body became hot, and my heart was pounding. No one has ever seen me like this before.
Stu gripped my inner thighs and started rubbing my clit through my lace panties. “Ouuu!” I moaned as my eyes rolled to the back of my head. I’ve never felt this type of pleasure before. “Let me hear those pretty moans, baby. I want everyone to know who’s making you feel this way.” He smirked. He started spreading my folds through the panties and sliding his thumb up and down on my slit. 
“Fuck!” I said to myself. I then felt him sliding my panties off my legs, he thought I wouldn’t notice but I saw him place my panties in his pocket. Pervert. “Your legs are so smooth and soft..and they smell good” Stu said with his hands gliding up and down on my legs. I’m so glad I shaved last night. He placed soft kisses on my inner thighs, kissing everywhere but the part I need him most. 
“Stop teasing me!” I pouted. My pussy was practically throbbing and desperate for him and he’s over here playing. “Someone’s a bit demanding..” he sassily said. I rolled my eyes at his remark and his mouth was now hovering over my core. I could feel his breath on me, I was craving him, I need him. I had enough of the teasing and finally shoved his mouth onto my core. 
“YESS!” I shouted as he started sucking on my clit. It felt so fucking good, his mouth was so warm and wet. My whole body jolted when his mouth connected with my clit. I tried to close my legs around his head but he grabbed them and opened them back up as I started to whine. “Don’t start bitchin now, princess, you wanted this.” He cockily said. “I knoww but it feels too good!” I practically shouted as he started poking started thrusting his tongue in and out of my pussy.
I forgot how long his tongue is but damn it sure does feel good. “You taste so good!” He said into my core as he dove deeper and was now slurping my juices. “Yeah?” I teasingly asked. Eating healthy actually paid off. “Tastes so sweet like fruit.” He moaned. I placed one leg on his shoulder as I pushed his head deeper into me. 
Stu flicked his tongue back and forth as my breathing started to pick up and a tight feeling appeared in my stomach. “S-Stu-I think I’m close.” I stuttered. “Squirt on my face-I wanna taste all of those sweet juices.” He demanded. 
He was now sucking on my clit basically trying to get every drop of juice out. I gripped the sheets tightly as the coil in my stomach had snapped and my pussy was spraying Stu in my juices as he was rubbing my clit as fast as he can. He let his tongue get covered in my juices, his face was glistening. 
My voice was cracked after the loud scream I had let out. I fell back into the pillows as Stu now laid on top of me. “I gotta eat you out more often.” He said with his infamous smirk. I playfully rolled my eyes before responding. “You’re so nasty!” I giggled. “Kiss me, you gotta see how good you taste.” He said as immediately placed his lips on mine. My eyes widened, he in fact did not lie. 
“Now common, let’s go back downstairs and enjoy the party.” He smiled before kissing me one last time. I sat up and watched Stu fix himself in the mirror before speaking up. “Can I have my panties back?” I asked with a raised brow as he shook his head. “Nah, you can get them the next time I eat you out.” He confidently said while fixing his hair. “Whatever.” I mumbled to myself before sliding my jean shorts back on. 
Stu and I went back downstairs and saw Sidney sitting in Randy’s lap. I frowned a bit at the interaction, Stu noticed this and placed his arm around my waist. “Ignore those fuckers. Like I said, you’re too good for him.” I’ve never seen Stu more serious. 
I nodded my head as Billy popped out of the corner and scared the living shit out of me. “Gosh, Billy! What happened to saying hello?” I complained. He studied me and Stu for a second and pointed at us. “She finally let you hit?” Billy smirked as I pinched his nipple. “Ounch!” He cried as Stu laughed at the both of us. “You’re talking about me like I’m not even here!” I stressed. 
“So you two didn’t fuck? There’s just this glow to you that I’ve never seen you had-“ I cut him off before he could finish his sentence. “Shut the hell up.” I said as I rolled my eyes. “I ate her out. Should’ve heard her, she was screaming and everything.” Stu laughed as they dapped each other up.
“Stu!” I whispered yelled as he laughed. He gripped my ass I took me into a kiss, it felt right, I didn’t even try to back away from it. He pulled away from the kiss and spoke up. “I’m sure you wouldn’t mind Billy joining us?” He lowly said in my ear. I looked over at Billy as he was now standing in front of me too. “I’m sure the princess doesn’t mind, doesn’t she?” He asked, referring to me. 
“Not at all.” I breathlessly said. As I was about to walk up the stairs with the both of them, Randy came running over. Stu and Billy both rolled their eyes at him. “Where are you guys going?l” he asked, you could tell he was a bit nervous and slightly worried. “We gotta handle something, won’t be done until about an hour, two tops.” Billy smirked as I tried to hold in my laugh. 
Before he could say anything else, Billy and Stu practically dragged me up the stairs and that’s when Randy caught on. We hurried up to Stu’s room and locked the door. Randy was banging on and apologizing. 
I was too busy sitting in between the boys and kissing them both at the same time. Randy could hear my moans from out the door. He know figured out that I must I’ve saw Sid sitting on his lap. 
He couldn’t do anything but sit outside the door and listen. 
That should be him. Not Billy or Stu he thought to himself.
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edenwolfie · 2 years ago
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I am going to FUCKING SET MY COMPUTER ON FIRE FUCKING HELL
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minakoainosupremacy · 2 years ago
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I’m sad, I’ve had a bunch of fun cool ideas sitting in the back of my head since like new years which I wanted to use for rare pair week, but like life has been kicking my ass so I didn’t have time to even start anything and now it’s over :( guess they will just keep living in my head until next year
#this is if I’m also not dying next year… which is unlikely#don’t do what I do. don’t work full time and do school full time. especially when you’re doing a dual graduate degree program. I’m in hell#brain screams#it especially makes me sad cause when I started writing fics in the summer it made me SO happy to be writing again!!!#especially about sailor moon!!! one of my special intrests and fav shows of all time!! it makes my brain SO HAPPY!!!#as I keep telling myself - just cause I don’t make these things now doesn’t mean I can do them in the future. my ideas will still be there#I can write the fics I want and finish the YouRube videos I’ve started. I can make silly little doodles and comics and short animations#I can take my Venus plus on hikes and exploring and to wonderful places!! we can go to museums and cafes and concerts!!#we can go to the ocean and climb mountains and get lost in the forest and get muddy and wet and cold and sit by campfires and climb on logs#I can take my not fully fleshed out idea of using her and my other plushes to make a sort of live action stop motion skit video!!#I want to be creative and free and have fun and live my life and pursue my passions!!#but rn… all i do is work. work and homework and class and homework. until I’m so fatigued I can’t walk and I can’t sleep and I can’t think#to be real watching the anime and having the codename: sailor v and stars arc of the manga is like one of the few things getting me through#when I’m so tired I can’t think I have those as comforts so I’m not sitting on the couch wanting to die#I find so much comfort in existing in the space of this fictional universe and I draw strength from the characters#like sailor moon helping me get through some of the hardest fucking shit I’ve ever done in my life. and helping me remember to love myself#also lowkey helping me fight off my depression and ed and substance abuse issues#I just both get so much joy and comfort from this space but also I feel I owe it so much gratitude for kinda helping me from crumbling#I want to also contribute to this space cause it gives me joy to do so and cause i want to give back and contribute to others joy as well#like it’s a combo of I love this and want to and also as a form of gratitude i want to and also to help others experience joy I want to#but… I don’t have the time or energy now. and if my life keeps going on like this. will I ever? I’ve never let myself slow down.#idk if I ever will :( oh well
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lowkeyerror · 3 months ago
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Talk it Out
Agatha Harkness x Rio Vidal x Reader
Word count: 1.5k
Notes: Agatha All Along Finale Spoilers, Angst, I guess it's hurt/comfort, happy ending
Summary: The confrontation between Agatha and Rio goes differently with you there to mediate.
An: I've been itching to write for Agatha. I check the tags everyday for new fics, so I thought maybe I should contribute. Hope you like it
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“Are you guys really going to do this? There has to be another way?”
Dark skies with ominous clouds loomed over Agatha's backyard. Rio was perched on the rooftop magic buzzing in her hands. Agatha stood on the ground exhausted from the trials of the road.
You found yourself standing in between the two.
“Darling, there is no other way. I don’t want to hurt you, don’t make me hurt you,” the rage dims in Rio's eyes as she looks at you.
You turn to the other woman. She’s trying to activate her powers, to no avail. You see a panic rise across her features. It's then that Rio begins her attack. When Agatha is flung back, you can’t help but scream her name.
“AGATHA!”
You attempt to run to her side, but vines snake their way up your legs keeping you in place.
“Rio please,” you plead with her.
Agatha answers, “She’s not going to listen to you sweetheart. Death is unkind, cruel even, and she cares for no one.”
Tears brim at your eyes hearing those words. Your whisper doesn’t get lost in the chaos, “That’s not true.”
“You can lie to yourself all you want Agatha, but she knows you’re full of shit,”  Rio hurls a vine at the witch leaving a nasty cut on her ankle.
“Look around Y/n, does this look like love,” Agatha spits out before her back connects with a tree.
Wires and vines alike start to wrap around Agatha, keeping her in place. Rio stalks towards her in a predatory fashion.
“End of the road Agatha, and you know where all roads lead.”
Agatha starts to beg for her life. This whole scene pulls your heart in two different directions.
Your magic was weak in comparison to most, but in this moment that didn’t matter. It was enough to escape the hold from the vines.
Just as Rio was going to blast Agatha out of existence you step between the two. Your hands outstretched to shield Agatha.
“Take me instead,” your gaze is soft when you meet Death’s stare.
“No,” Agatha and Rio speak in unison.
You shake your head, “You don’t get to say no. You need a soul and I’m offering mine.”
“It- it’s not your time,” Rio's excuse is flimsy.
“I’ve been around just as long as she has. I’ve sat by and watched her do the things that she did. I am your lover, just like she is. So you’re taking my soul.”
Agatha protests again, “She can’t have you.”
You turn to face her, “She already does, my love. I do not fear her as you do. I do not resent her. Spending eternity with her does not scorn me. I love her just as I love you.”
A scowl grows on Agatha’s face, “How can you forgive her?”
Rio wants to speak, but you place your hand on her chest, causing her to hold her tongue.
You squat down to Agatha’s level. Your hands caress her face, “I am grateful for what she gave us Agatha. Are you not? We’ve been alive for centuries, yet nothing has ever come close to those 6 years.”
“She took him from us.”
You shook your head, your voice was delicate, “He wasn’t even meant to take his first breath. We might’ve made him from scratch, but there’s only one person that gave him life, and you hate her for it.”
“He was my son too,” Rio speaks, no longer in her fighting stance.
Her eyes boring into Agatha, with a sorrow only death could convey.
Angry tears welled in Agatha’s eyes, “In the middle of the night. When we couldn’t even say goodbye. I was going to- I was going to do better for him, Rio.”
“I had to take him, and if either or you asked me not to… I don’t think I would’ve been able to do it. Don’t you think I would’ve loved to see him grow, Agatha? He was so much of all of us even at that age.”
“He was smart and cunning like you,  Agatha. He had your affinity for nature and balance, Rio. And he.. .”
“Was kind, just like you sweetheart,” Agatha finished your sentence.
Rio frowns, “I took no joy in taking him. In fact, taking a soul has never hurt so much. I didn’t just lose Nicky, I lost you too.”
“Tell her the truth,” you say to Agatha, who shifts a bit under your gaze.
“There’s nothing to tell,” her sentence falls flat at the end, in the way it does when she's lying.
Your tired eyes look at her, “Agatha, please.”
“I ran because I’m scared. Not of you, but of facing Nicky. If he saw who I am, what I’ve become he would-"
“Love you anyway,” Rio spoke with certainty.
It’s then that Agatha fully drops her mask, vulnerability on full display, “How are you sure?”
“You never hid yourself from him. He knows what kind of person you are, he always did. Maybe he wanted you to change, but he still loved you the way you were,” Rio spoke it like a fact.
It broke Agatha. She began to sob, “I don’t hate you. I could never hate you. I’m sorry.”
You began to free Agatha from her spot against the tree. Rio instantly broke the binds after watching you struggle. She was cautious in her approach, of the two of you.
Rio wraps her arms around Agatha. Agatha melts into the embrace, the warmth comforting her. Rio begins to wipe away the woman’s tears.
You watch with a tender gaze and relief flooding through your features.
“No more fighting,” you look between the two of them.
“What about Billy?” Agatha clears her throat, trying to regain her composure.
Rio deflates, taking a step back from Agatha, “I still-”
“I told you to take mine,” you speak up.
Rio’s eyes darken, “I won’t.”
You invade the woman’s personal space. Your arms settle around the back of her neck. You lean into her, forehead resting against hers.
She breathes you in calmly. Eyes fluttering close. You kiss her, deeply. You don’t focus on the pain coursing through you, but rather the softness of her lips, the eagerness of her hands, the warmth of her body.
You can feel yourself slipping, but it doesn’t go too far as you are roughly shoved away from Rio.
“ARE YOU CRAZY!” Agatha yells.
Your breath is ragged as your life force slowly returns to you, “Maybe.”
You don’t think as you shoot your magic at Agatha. You know her instincts, you’ve seen them in action. Without thought she begins draining you of your powers. As you crumble, she rises.
“AGATHA!” Rio’s voice echoes something deadly.
It knocks Agatha out of her trance and she quickly cuts the line between your power and hers. You lay flat on the ground with your eyes open towards the sky. You’re breathing is minimal but present.
Rio looks at Agatha, “You need to give her some back or she won't make it.”
Agatha’s hands are trembling and she tries to out the power back, but nothing is happening.
“She’s- she’s not taking it,” Agatha begins to mumble.
“Y/n you have to receive the power, you have to do it or you’ll die,” Rio says sternly.
“The soul,”  you mumble.
Rio growls, “Forget about the soul, I’ll figure it out, just please.”
Before Agatha can put the magic, back into you again, you’re hit with a bright blue ray of energy. The force with which it hits you makes you jolt into an upright position.
“Is she going to be alright?” Billy jogs over to the scene in front of him.
It’s not what he thought it was going to be originally and for that he’s grateful. Fighting Death was not anywhere near his bucket list.
“Did you-”
“I-I came to fight and then I saw… everything. It just made sense to help,” Billy’s eyes search all 3 women.
You answer him first, “I’m alright, everything is fine.”
“A-are you sure?”
You look to Rio, who is already looking at you, she tells the teen “You are free to go.”
He looks at Agatha first and then you.
“We will around if you need us, don’t fret. This is not a journey, you have to walk alone,” you tell him.
The boy is quick to wrap his arms around you in a hug. You squeeze him back and whisper in his ear, “We will help you find him.”
He nods at your words. He takes one more glance at Agatha and Rio before leaving the yard.
“When are you going to tell him about the road?” Agatha questions you.
“Later, after I’ve spent some time with the women that I love. Both of them,” you say hopefully.
Rio looks at Agatha, you both knew it was her call.
The woman let out a dramatic sigh, “Nothing too strenuous I'm exhausted from all of that hard work.”
“A bath would do you well,” Rio bites back.
Agatha rolls her eyes, “You just want to see me naked.”
Rio chuckles, “Well, it has been quite some time. I’m sure Y/n wouldn't mind an intimate moment with both of us either.”
You shook your head, “Not one complaint.”
“You’re both ridiculous,” Agatha speaks.
“You love it,” Rio counters.
Agatha looks at you and then Rio before letting out a sigh, “I love you both.”
958 notes · View notes
harrysfolklore · 8 months ago
Note
YES WE NEED DAD!CHARLES
baby leclerc - cl16
it’s father’s day so perfect excuse to write some dad!charles. i hope you like this tooth rooting fluff
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
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liked by charles_leclerc, lilymhe and 288,986 others
yourinstagram my job in the paddock is wife ❤️
view all 8,028 comments
username1 ICONIC
francisca.cgomes my queenie ily 💕
↳ yourinstagram love YOU
↳ username2 the best WAGS
charlesfan1 im still not over the fact that charles is married (i know it’s been more than a year)
scuderiaferrari We love Mrs. Leclerc ❤️
↳ charlesfan2 just fell to my knees at walmart
charlesfan3 she really won in life
username3 drop the hair routine
iamrebeccad 😍
↳ username1 ferrari wags >>>>
lilyhme you mean MY wife
↳ yourinstagram absolutely 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩
↳ alex_albon Do something about this @/charles_leclerc
↳ charles_leclerc We’re doomed mate, sorry
leclerc_pascale Ma belle fille 💕💕
↳ yourinstagram je t'aime maman !
↳ charlesfan1 WHY AM I CRYING OVER THIS INTERACTION
charles_leclerc Love of my life ❤️
↳ charlesfan1 CRYING
↳ charlesfan2 SOBBING
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liked by yourinstagram, pierregasly and 1,153,959 others
charles_leclerc Lovely time out in the track. Let’s go back home to the wifey now ❤️
view all 25,478 comments
charlesfan1 BABYYYYY
charlesfan2 THE CAPTION 😭
username1 i’ve never seen a man flex that he’s married this much
maxverstappen1 Whipped
↳ landonorris Don’t be jealous Max
↳ username2 CLOCK HIM
charlesfan3 WHEN IS YN GOING TO BE IN THE PADDOCK AGAIN??
↳ charlesfan1 seriously it’s been a month
francisca.cgomes MY wifey
↳ charles_leclerc Do I even bother? @/pierregasly
↳ pierregasly It’s a lost cause
↳ yourinstagram don’t be jealous of me and my wife 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩
↳ charlesfan1 😭😭😭
username3 bring yn back to the paddock
yourinstagram my hubby is so 😍😍😍
↳ landonorris I feel so single right now
↳ charles_leclerc ❤️love you
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liked by yourinstagram, maxverstappen1 and 5,027,337 others
charles_leclerc We can’t wait to meet you, baby girl ❤️
view all 45,826 comments
charlesfan1 OMAHSKSHSUAYA
charlesfan2 IM STILL SCREAMING
lilymhe 🫶🫶🫶🥲 my heart
lewishamilton CONGRATULATIONS beautiful family already
username1 I KNEW IT
charlesfan3 can we talk about how casually charles dropped that information on the interview 😭😭 like SIR
↳ charlesfan1 and how he was trying to contain his smile while he was talking IM SOBBING
pierregasly CONGRATULATIONS MY FRIEND 👏👏
schecoperez Welcome to fatherhood Charles !
charlesfan4 HOLD ON BABY GIRL ??? THEY’RE HAVING A GIRL ?????
↳ charlesfan2 ALREADY DYING OVER GIRL DAD CHARLES
↳ yourinstagram we don’t know what we’re having yet (it’s going to be a surprise) but charles insists we’re having a girl !
↳ charlesfan1 IM CRYING WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THIS INFORMATION
↳ charles_leclerc It’s called fatherly instincts 😘
↳ charlesfan2 AHHHH
scuderiaferrari We can’t wait to have a little Tifosi running around the garage ❤️
↳ charlesfan1 crying once again over the thought of charles bringing his kids to the races
georgerussell63 Can I be godfather?
↳ maxverstappen1 No, I am
↳ pierregasly You wish
↳ arthur_leclerc I’m the brother, It’s me
↳ charlesfan2 IM SCREAMING THEY’RE ALL SO
oscarpiastri Congratulations 🫶
charlesfan5 i’ve been weeping over this post and the comments for an hour now
redbullracing We make baby sized redbull jackets
↳ username1 REDBULL ADMIN WILDING 😭
↳ charles_leclerc Never.
carlossainz55 ❤️❤️❤️
joris__trouche Whoever said they wanted to be godfather, just want you to know that I won
↳ username2 😭😭😭
leclerc_pascale 💕💕💕💕
francisca.cgomes LOVE YOU BOTH 🫶
landonorris Uncle Lando is ready to babysit
↳ charles_leclerc Bold of you to assume I’ll let you babysit my kid
↳ landofan1 HEEEEEEEELPPPP
danielricciardo Beautiful news, you will make the cutest family
lilyzneimer 🥺
mclaren Papaya is a great color for a nursery 🧡
↳ charles_ leclerc NO
↳ landonorris YES
lorenzotl My baby brother is having a baby, I feel old
yourinstagram squish is already so loved by all of their uncles and aunties 🥺🥺 i love you all
↳ charles_leclerc Her* we’re having a girl 🥰
↳ yourinstagram STOP THIS
charlesfan6 this comment section is a rollercoaster
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liked by charles_leclerc, iamrebeccad and 502,188 others
yourinstagram the last few days 💌 the hubby is glued to the bump whenever he’s home, squish and i watch races together and i swear i can feel them jump when charles talks on the screen, we miss you papa @/charles_leclerc 🤍
view all 9,644 comments
username1 this caption just killed me
username2 THIS IS SO CUTE
charlesfan1 IM SOBBING ACTUALLY
lilymhe 💗💗 cutest family ever
scuderiaferrari Little Tifosi in the making ❤️
↳ mclaren They can always become Papaya
↳ charles_leclerc Never, we settled it
↳ username1 not the admins fighting
carlossainz55 Sending you big hugs from me and Rebecca 🫶
charlesfan2 CHARLES GO BACK TO YOUR PREGNANT WIFEEEE
francisca.cgomes I’m coming with sweets for you and baby leclerc 💕💕
↳ yourinstagram this is why i love you
username3 they still don’t know what they’re having ahhh
↳ charlesfan3 but i bet charles keeps insisting it’s a girl
maxverstappen1 Don’t worry, I’m making sure to give him all the girl dad tips along with Checo while you’re home
↳ yourinstagram we don’t know if it’s a girl stop it 😭
↳ charles_leclerc It’s a girl ❤️
↳ username3 omg girldads max checo and charles
landonorris So, about godfather again?
↳ pierregasly No
↳ arthur_leclerc Give it up
↳ alex_albon It’s not happening
leclerc_pascale l'attente est presque terminée!
↳ charlesfan1 OMFG SHE SAID THAT THE WAIT IS ALMOST OVER THE BABY MUST BE COMING REALLY SOON
↳ charlesfan2 YELLING
charles_leclerc I miss you so much, my girls ❤️
↳ charlesfan3 he’s NOT giving up
↳ yourinstagram why do i even bother
↳ yourinstagram we miss you too 💗
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liked by maxverstappen1, yourinstagram and 7,836,377 others
charles_leclerc Welcome to the world, our precious girl ❤️
Words cannot express the overwhelming joy and love I feel holding you in my arms for the first time. Becoming your daddy is the greatest gift life has given me, and I promise to cherish and protect you every single day. Thank you to everyone for your incredible support and well wishes during this special time.
PS: Father’s intuition is always right 😉
view all 72,368 comments
charlesfan1 OH LORD
charlesfan2 I JUST FELL TO MY KNEES AT WALMART
username1 baby leclerc is here 🥺🥺🥺
georgerussell63 Baby Leclerc is so loved by so many already 🤍
lewishamilton Congratulations to your beautiful family, wishing you all the happiness in the world ‬ with your little girl 🫶
↳ username2 THIS IS SO SWEET OMG
charlesfan3 HE WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG 😭
charlesfan4 CHARLES IS A GIRL DAD AHHHH
schecoperez Enhorabuena Charles! Parenthood is a wild ride just like a race weekend. Enjoy every lap! Welcome to the club
maxverstappen1 Can’t wait to take her under my wing and make her world champion
↳ redbullracing Redbull gives you wings 😉
↳ charles_leclerc NO
arthur_leclerc I’m the happiest uncle ever ❤️
francisca.cgomes I’m still crying. Baby Leclerc we love you so much 🤍
charlesfan5 FERRARI PRINCESS IS HERE
scuderiaferrari A future Ferrari champion in the making? 🤔 Wishing you all the happiness and joy in this new chapter of life!
↳ username1 they got the serious admin for this one
carmenmmundt What a precious blessing. Sending lots of love to you two ✨
oscarpiastri Congratulations ���
charlesfan7 THIS IS THE MOST PRECIOUS CAPTION EVER
danielricciardo Aww, mini Leclerc! Congrats mate, can't wait to see her in a little Ferrari jumpsuit
carlossainz55 So happy for you my friend, you’re going to be the best dad for the little princess ❤️
↳ iamrebeccad We love you so much, baby Leclerc
pierregasly Wow mate! Time really flies, I’m so happy to see my childhood best friend become a dad 💙
↳ username1 this is so wholesome
username4 I WONDER WHAT HER NAME IS
alex_albon I read this caption to Lily and she started sobbing, we love you a lot in this household, baby Leclerc
joris__trouche I love my goddaughter so much 💗
↳ maxverstappen1 When was that settled?
↳ pierregasly I would also like to know
↳ arthur_leclerc I’m really offended right now
↳ charlesfan1 HEEEELP
mlnmarta Baby Chiara is ready to play with her little cousin 🥺
↳ charlesfan2 AHHH BABY CHIARA AND BABY LECLERC TOGETHER
landonorris UNCLE LALA MODE ON LOVE YOU ALREADY PRINCESS LECLERC
↳ landofan1 😭😭❤️
↳ maxfan1 stop P will get jealous
yourinstagram your love and support have made this journey truly magical. thank you for being an amazing hubby and father already. we're so grateful for you 🤍
↳ charlesfan1 THATS IT. IM CRYING AGAIN
↳ charlesfan2 this family is the purest thing ever
↳ charles_leclerc Thank you for everything ❤️
2K notes · View notes
beardedjoel · 3 months ago
Text
indebted
dark!joel x f!reader. one shot.
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main masterlist | ao3 | kofi
summary: you're having a bad day. one you think is getting better once a rough around the edges man comes to your rescue. you didn't expect it would takes such a sharp turn for the worse. first person pov reader. 9.2k words.
warnings: 18+ MDNI! DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT! NON CONSENUAL SEXUAL ACTS, READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION, pervy, sleazy, and foul mouthed joel. degradation, sexual favors, forced oral and piv, virgin reader, corruption, innocence, and daddy kinks featured. biiig ol' age gap (reader's age not mentioned other than "young" but i imagine her as 18-20 as she has a relatively immature attitude, imagining joel 50-55), this is not for everyone and that's okay. i'm not responsible for the content you consume.
a/n: i had some hormonal induced insanity and came up with this. i had a great time trying out a new pov for writing fic! enjoy him as much as i did, friends 🖤 and thanks @joelstummy for the amazing freaky beta work!
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I’ll be the first person to admit now that what I’ve been doing is stupid. Dangerous. Idiotic. The list goes on. I can hear my father’s stern, militant voice in the back of my head, telling me as much. Except now he likely won’t get the chance to relish in it because I’m going to die here. Way out here where nobody will find my body, and I’ll be just another person that went missing in the QZ, never to be seen again. But this time, it’s not some sleazy FEDRA scheme and coverup or a smuggling deal gone wrong.
It’s utterly and completely my fault.
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Sneaking out wasn’t meant to become a habit, but after the first few times, I lost the fear and adrenaline that had burned hot through my veins at those first steps of freedom. I craved it again, so I kept going further. And further. Away from civilization as I knew it, until the cluster of buildings known as the Quarantine Zone became a tiny speck in the distance. Out here was desolation, nothingness, only abandoned buildings to explore. The infected were another story, but I started to learn routes that helped me avoid encounters with them.
It helped clear my mind after a while, this newly found sense of adventure. All I’d ever known was a cage, a walled city that had become so mundane I felt my insides starting to rot from the listlessness of it all. My father was important - top in the rankings - I knew that, and it was all the more reason to keep me safely locked away while the city stirred with chatter of an uprising against FEDRA. 
He never bothered to check on me much, anyways, making my little forays quite easy. Once I’d persuaded enough people with ration cards, they’d shown me the tunnel leading to freedom. Well, that tunnel, then another, a ladder to climb back up to the surface, and only then could I go through a precarious hole in a chain link fence. That was the smuggler’s route, they said, an easy ticket to getting in and out without being noticed. 
I’d been abusing it, staying out for days at a time, never able to drink in enough of this quiet solitude that was of my own choosing, not my father’s. I couldn’t quite figure out what hole inside of me I was trying to fill, but I’d be damned if I stopped trying.
However, today seemed to be my last chance to try at all. His footsteps had been quiet - so quiet - approaching behind me. An old store, full of half decayed plushies, molded candies, and other adorable things from lives long put in the past, had called to me, distracted me. The arm around my throat, constricting, the other coming up to put a hand over my mouth. A dirty, putrid smell encompassing everything as I sputtered against him. This is it, I’d thought. What a waste.
I scream and fight against the strong hold he has on me, a nasty sneer right against my skin. “What’s some fresh meat like you doing waaaay out here, huh?” a dark voice rattles into my ear.
I scream behind his dirty palm in response, kicking my legs back at him. I should have learned more self defense, but who needs it when you’ve spent most of your life safely tucked away with your family name as your biggest protector?
“You smell good… real good…” The creep’s voice buzzes by me as he takes a deep breath in, making me shudder. One swift kick and I’m sure this is it, the one to knock him senseless and let me escape. He’s smart for how distracted he seems to be by my scent, and he’s one step ahead of me. My legs are kicked out from underneath me as I rear one back, and I fall to the ground, the man coming down with me to sit on my back, straddling my body in a fluid motion. He grips my hands behind my back, leaving me helpless in my fight, kicking and screaming. I’m ice and heat all at once, my body burning in a frozen blaze, my fight or flight quickly turning to fawn as his weight presses down on me.
“You can have anything in my backpack, anything! Please, let me go! I - I don’t want any trouble,” I choke out pathetically, hating how my voice comes out in shaky waves. This isn’t how to appeal to people like this, people who have lost their sense of humanity, evident by the way he’s now grinding himself down onto my jean clad asscheeks. 
A laugh comes out of him that would haunt me as evil incarnate for the rest of my days if I wasn’t so sure that I was going to die at the hands of this man after he was done with me. “We both know I don’t give a fuck about any damn backpack of yours. I don’t want any trouble either, sweet cheeks, I just think you’d have a lot of fun with me and my friends. But mostly me,” he replies with the hint of a wink in his voice. 
My stomach clenches, sickness rolling in that is only furthered as the man leans down, cloaking me with his large form. I can’t turn enough to see him, to even know what this violation of a man looks like, but his energy is beyond hideous as I catch a glimpse of his yellowing teeth in a grin before he pushes my head down to the cracked linoleum tiles. My hair tangled in his fingers, he holds me down hard, and I struggle to breathe as he crushes me beneath him.
“Now, are you gonna come easily, or do I need to do things the hard way? Either way is fine with me, for a fine piece of ass like this. In fact, I might prefer it the hard way, but we’d hate to ruin this pretty skin of yours, wouldn’t we?” He says slowly, pressing the cold blade of a knife to my throat.
“O-okay, okay,” I acquiesce, stopping my squirming, just needing a bit of room to breathe, my lungs heavy inside my chest. My panic only makes my chest tighter, even when the man leans back the tiniest bit. I had hoped that my sudden compliance would get that knife off my throat, but it hasn’t. “Just don’t hurt me… please…” I whimper.
He lets out a long, ragged sigh. “Afraid I can’t promise that.” 
I’ve never felt fear like this, such certainty that I was about to be ruined, my life as I know it changing without a chance to even look back. I squeeze my eyes shut and brace for it, for anything he’s about to do next, finally accepting that there isn’t any appealing to scummy men in a scummy world. But nothing comes except for a muffled crack ringing through the air, and then a thud as the entire weight of my adversary falls on top of me, crushing. Something warm has splattered on my skin, my face, then starts to coat my jacket, seeping through. I shake violently, begging my body to catch a full breath under the weight of him. 
Then as suddenly as it happened, it stops, the body yanked off of me and tossed to the side with ease. The deafening thud of his entire weight onto the ground is stark. I flip over and scramble backwards, grabbing the knife that had fallen from the man’s hand in his swift, final moment. Holding up a shaky hand, I grip the knife tightly, looking up to face a brutish, tall man with overgrown hair of chestnut and gray. A trim beard with the same coloring wraps around his tightly set jaw. He’s all wide shoulders, thick arms, broad chest, and my senses go on high alert again. His gun is practically still smoking as it hangs at his side, an active threat.
“Y’alright?” he drawls, thick and deep, echoing through the abandoned shop. One step closer to me has the knife practically flailing as I struggle to calm my hands, a strained hum alongside my shaky breathing the only sound I seem capable of making.
“Put that thing down,” he says calmly, almost exasperated. His stance slackens, one knee pushed out as he sizes me up. I’m likely the most miserable looking thing he’s seen in a while, I’m sure. “You’re harmless.”
“H-how do I know you’re not with him?” I blurt out.
My gruff savior lifts his brows incredulously. “That guy?” he asks, motioning impatiently to the dead body only a foot away. “Think I’d be puttin’ a bullet right in his skull if he was my best buddy?”
My eyes dance over him as I think. He has a point, and he did just save me from whatever debauched things that stranger’s mind had been conjuring up.
“Y-yeah, you have a point,” I finally say. He steps closer, and this time, I let him, putting the knife down. He motions with an authoritarian air for me to push it away, and I obey immediately, flinging it across the room. 
“Poor fucker died with a hard on, didn’t he?” The man muses as his boots thud on the way over to the body, kicking it slightly as if to check, letting it roll back before turning his attention on me. “Now, are you usually this stupid, comin’ into hunter territory, or what?” he asks, reaching a hand down to me, presumably to help me up.
“I didn’t know…” I mumble, letting his hand hang there. He doesn’t snatch it back right away, although I can tell he wants to, that he’s already beyond exasperated by his day and the last thing he’d wanted was a damsel in distress like me. I hate that he’s proving all the things I’d been trying to disprove about myself by coming out on these solo trips into the great, big outside. I’m weak. Dependent. Needy. It makes my skin crawl with self loathing and frustration.
“Didn’t know, huh? So just clueless, then?” the man spits out, staring down at me with darkened eyes that make me turn my head away in shame. At my sullen silence, he seems to soften a little. “I’m Joel,” he says, an offering to go along with his outstretched hand.
I sigh, taking it and telling him my own name. I’m up on my feet, dusting myself off and looking at him shyly now. I don’t know what people are supposed to say when someone saves their life, so I just mumble, “Thank you.”
Joel snorts, nodding in acknowledgment as he crouches to pat down the body, seeming to come up short of anything interesting. “Don’t thank me yet,” he says, standing back to his full, towering height, glancing around with sharp eyes. “We should move.”
I might be as stupid as he says, because I wordlessly start to follow him towards the door. His hand stretches out behind him, open and inviting me in as he checks outside the door with a careful peek, his gun held tightly in the other. I stare down at it in disbelief. “C’mon, I don’t bite,” he sighs, that perpetual vexation in his tone again as he twitches his brows at me. “Need you close by. An’ it seems you have a tendency to go where you shouldn’t.”
My cheeks grow hot at the harsh truth of it, and I grasp his hand without any further objections, marveling for a moment at the way it envelops mine. All calloused and hard, mine soft and unused for labor of any kind. 
“I’ve got a safehouse not too far from here.”
“A safehouse?”
“It’s already gettin’ dark. There ain’t no way we’re making it back to the QZ today, princess,” he retorts quickly, the pet name mocking on his tongue.
“How’d you know?” I ask softly, disappointment pressing in on my shoulders.
He chuckles out more of a snort, pulling me around a bend, slowly leaving behind the dangerous territory that I’d unknowingly encroached on. “You’re a FEDRA princess if I’ve ever seen one,” he tells me, and my heart sinks that I was so easy to read. I’d seen how capable this man Joel was, but damn was he was astute, more than I’d given him credit for. 
I chew at my lip. “Fair enough,” I mumble under my breath, letting him take his well earned win. The longer I hang onto Joel’s hand, letting him expertly weave me through the barren streets, the safer I start to feel. He knows where he’s going, a practiced route he’s taken countless times, and it hits me then that this man is a smuggler. He has to be.
“Are you a smuggler?” I ask pointedly. “I’ve heard that people like that come in and out of the QZ.”
Joel falters for just a brief second, giving me a wily grin. “Look who’s readin’ who now,” he says with a dry chuckle. “Ain’t gonna run and tell your daddy, are you?”
I shake my head, pressing my lips together in a smile. “I can keep a secret.” In fact, I like keeping secrets from my father, hence the sneaking out, so Joel can count on me to never rat him out.
His amused grin in response lights a little flame akin to friendship inside of me. This grumpy old bastard could smile after all. “Just through here,” he says, letting the smile drop, taking a sharp left down a street just as a sprinkle of rain starts to fall on us. It’s a less urban area - more like a neighborhood - sprouted with apartment buildings and abandoned, vine covered cars. It’s my favorite thing about all the exploration I’ve been doing, seeing the way nature can reclaim anything and make it her own. 
The cracked street below us makes me tread carefully, lagging behind as Joel’s hand tugs me along urgently. We turn down an alley, Joel whipping his head left to right before dragging me behind him, finally dropping my hand to open a door that leads right into a tiny lobby and a stairwell. He runs a hand through his damp hair, slicking it back some - a rather handsome look for him, now that I’m thinking about it. I try to ignore that thought as his voice booms through the empty room.
“Up,” he commands, gripping my hand again and leading us up the stairs. 
My stomach sinks a little when he takes out a key, unlocking a padlock on one of the apartments numbered 405 and pushing the old, chipped door inwards. I have no reason not to trust Joel, he saved my life afterall, but I can’t shake the nerves I feel from being in an unfamiliar place with an unfamiliar man. It’s quiet here, likely nobody in the vicinity but the two of us.
“Home sweet home,” he grunts out, dropping his backpack and gun holster near the door and shrugging off his damp jacket, leaving him in a plain tee shirt that hugs his muscular frame. It’s a small, cramped apartment with a living room and kitchen directly next to it, a little window cut into the wall, peering in on the living room from above the stove. It looks as if it’s left exactly as it was years ago, full of furniture and clutter, only a vessel for Joel to use without making it his own at all. I peer past to see a small hallway I can only assume leads to a bedroom and bathroom.
“Know it ain’t the palace you’re probably used to, but we’ll be safe an’ dry here,” he say, and I roll my eyes behind his back. If Joel thinks that I live in a palace, he’s clearly misunderstood the state that the QZ is in. My father’s house is spacious, sure, but it’s just as dilapidated as the rest of the city. The only difference is the level of protection afforded to our homes.
He ambles into the kitchen, rummaging through the cabinets with a clatter, then comes back moments later with an open can of beans and two forks. I’m still standing in the entryway, unsure of what to do with myself.
“Hungry?” he asks gruffly, and I shake my head, wide eyed. I’d lost my appetite the minute that man had grabbed me earlier, and I couldn’t seem to get it back. Joel shrugs, digging in with a messy forkful of from the can. “Your funeral,” he says, chewing.
Joel sinks down onto the couch with a tiny groan, setting down the can on the side table next to his armrest, giving the other cushion an expectant look. “Well, you gonna sit your ass on down an’ tell me why the hell I had to save it today, or what? Why the hell you’re wanderin’ around like it’s a free for all out there?”
I flinch slightly at his harsh tone, but gingerly step my way into the room, unzipping my jacket and shedding it. For the chill outside, the temperature inside the apartment is more comfortable than I’d expect, my skin welcoming the change. Joel eyes my thin tee shirt, and I feel a flash of heat sweep my skin before I feel the prickle of goosebumps, knowing my nipples are poking through the fabric. His eyes catch there before he promptly averts them.
I sit precariously next to Joel on the loveseat, pressed as far away as I can from him, not wanting to cramp his personal space. But he seems to have no problem with that anyways, his legs spread wide open in a comfortable stance, leaned back against the cushions. He pinches the bridge of his nose, eyes shut for a moment as he awaits my answer. 
“I was… exploring,” I say simply, cringing at how ridiculous it sounds coming out of my mouth. Who leaves perfect safety to wander around in a dangerous world on purpose? For no other reason than curiosity and a sudden, rebellious sense of defiance?
His eyes snap open, head pulling up from the couch, turning my way. “Explorin’…” He mulls on the word, slowly licking his lips before pursing them. “You’re tellin’ me I had to save a FEDRA brat today ‘cause she was explorin’? You really are stupid. ‘Course you are, look how young y’are. Look how fuckin’... sheltered.” Joel throws his hands up, landing them on his thighs with a soft thud, sighing. “Can’t even blame ya.”
I pluck up every bit of courage I have, glaring at him with narrowed eyes. “Look, it was really nice of you to save me and everything, and I do thank you for it. I’m sorry if I messed up whatever… smuggling stuff you had going on today, but I’d appreciate it if you didn’t call me… stupid.” The last word is quiet, mousy, and I turn my head down, eyes shining with unshed tears that I silently curse myself for. My father’s voice rings through my head - you stupid girl! - making me shudder.
Joel sucks at his teeth. “Hit a nerve, I see,” he says passively. “Alright, I’m sorry kiddo. I just mean, you’re puttin’ yourself at risk doin’ what you’re doin’, and it ain’t a smart idea. Yeah?”
“Yeah,” I sigh out, relaxing a little. “I just needed to get away.”
“From your dear old daddy?” he teases, picking up the can, shoveling several more bites into his mouth. I go silent, picking at a thread on the couch rather than answer him. “Ah, another nerve, I see. Daddy issues. Could’ve guessed that one.”
“I don’t have -”
“Sweetheart…” Joel interrupts, looking at me from under his brows, pulling his lip between his teeth, seeming to look at me in a fresh light. It sends my skin tingling, the way he eyes me, a glint in his stare. It seems to prove his point, the way a pet name from a middle aged man seems to immobilize me against my will. I want to slap the smug look off his face, but I have no grounds to do so, only grumbling quietly with my cheeks blazing in embarrassment. A prickle of something else works its way deep into my belly, something warm at how his scrutinizing eyes flick over my body, the lines in his face set, showing his age, his experience. 
“Take a piece of advice from a man probably as old as your daddy, then. Trust me when I say that outside those walls ain’t the place to find what you’re lookin’ for. The sooner you let go of that notion, the better off you’ll be.” 
Frustration blooms hot in my chest, overpowering whatever the hell that sudden, unwanted feeling was. I’m tired of people dictating what I can and can’t do, what I’m capable of. “People do it all the time - smugglers - you would know,” I retort. “I’ve been doing it for months. Never had a problem until today. It was just some bad luck.”
“Bad luck? Really? You’d be that man’s newest little cock sleeve if it weren’t for me savin’ your ass,” Joel growls, standing up off the couch. I wince at his vulgar language, the picture it paints in my mind of what life might have been like if Joel hadn’t happened to be in the right place at the right time.
“I - I know - I’m sorry,” I blurt out, feeling my hands start to go shaky. “Thank you, Joel, I really - I really do owe you. Everything.”
“Like I said, don’t thank me yet.” He steps over so that he’s in front of me, using his boot to part my legs, scooting them apart and standing between them. “Think I did all this out of the kindness of my heart, did you? Didn’t think that maybe I was after the same damn thing as buddy boy earlier?”
I’m like a fish out of water, the way my lips move with no sound coming out. “Joel…” I breathe out in warning, in questioning. I see his arms strain in his t-shirt, hands flexing open and closed.
“I can’t say the thought ain’t crossin’ my mind now. You are mighty pretty. And you do owe me a favor. One big ol’ gigantic favor, for savin’ your backside.” He brushes his fingers along his jeans, palming his crotch for a brief second before leaning forward, caging me in on the couch with hands on either side of me, pressing into the cushions. My heart hammers in my chest so loud I expect Joel can hear it, can feel the fear taking hold of me. He bares his teeth above me like a wild animal, and now I’m certain he can smell my fear too, that he thrives on it. 
“You know what? Maybe you were bound to find what you were lookin’ for outside those walls. Maybe that’s what you needed, is it? Couldn’t find any love from daddy back home, so you wanted to find someone to turn you into their own personal little play thing. Poor baby just needed some attention, did she? Sad, really.”
My hands tremble, my words lost as I can only breathe in shaky little breaths, shaking my head violently. How can this god forsaken day keep getting worse? 
“Please -” I mumble out, bringing a jittery hand up to my mouth. Joel slaps it away, gripping my chin harshly at first, inspecting me before his thumb brushes over my bottom lip. I’d think it was gentle, caring, even, if not for the nasty look spreading across his face, the grin that darkens it along with his eyes.
“Time to put this pretty thing to better use and show how grateful you are to ol’ daddy Joel,” he says, using his free hand to deftly unbuckle his belt, the jangling sound like a death knell, making my throat go dry. “Promise I’ll be much better than he would’ve been earlier. People say I’m… a generous lover.” His drawl is slow and calculated, voice deep with lust, the sly smirk turning to a triumphant grin as he chuckles, amusing himself.
He grips the top of my head, pushing me to slide down the couch cushions into a slump as I struggle, powerless against a man of his strength. He positions himself higher up to bring the giant denim bulge right in my view. I wince, trying to turn my head away as his zipper comes undone, his hand grasping deep into the fly of his jeans, yanking his cock out. When it springs free, I gasp as he lets it slap me in the face. Hot, throbbing, and massive, leaking a shiny bead of precum that had ended up somewhere on my cheek. I sit stunned and held in place by his rough hand. 
The cold hard fact hits me that this is the first time I’m ever going to experience intimacy of any kind. Hell, I’ve only had one kiss before, and it was when I was ten years old, with a boy belonging to one of my father’s friends, a name I can’t even remember now. The first penis I’m ever seeing is right here, right now, in a context I have had zero control over. It’s thicker than I’d imagined one could be, softer too as I look at the skin of it. Veins run along the sides and bottom, all leading up to an imposing, angry pink head at the tip, practically bursting as it awaits me. It’s magnificent and terrifying at the same time, nothing like what I’d expected based on the half-assed health classes provided by schooling in the QZ. Sex has always had a shroud of mystery for me, and I never imagined that all those secrets, long awaited, would be uncovered like this. A dingy bedroom, a man likely almost three times my age, and me as an unwilling participant. Desperation swiftly grips my chest as I realize I actually have no clue what goes on behind closed doors between two people, and I have a feeling I’m about to find out in the crudest of ways.
The fearful innocence I know is about to be stolen from me causes tears to sting at my eyes, fat little droplets that instantly start to roll down my cheeks, leaking onto Joel’s large fingers still gripped around my chin. I start to struggle, my body seeming to catch up with my mind, loud warning sirens of DANGER! DANGER! finally blaring out in a panic. When I squirm, Joel plants one of his knees into my body, keeping himself balanced while still being able to hold me down. 
“Don’t cry now, honey, it’ll only make him harder.” He sneers as he strokes his cock, slapping the head against my closed lips a few times. He wrenches my jaw down, forcing it open. “Nice ‘n wide for this big boy, there we go,” he says, not waiting a moment longer to barge his cock past the opening while he has it. 
He groans loudly as he shoves several inches in right from the get go, his eyes nearly rolling back in his head. The hand that had been holding my jaw presses in on my shoulder, holding me in place. I’d have nowhere to go, anyways, with his knee on my thighs, his entire body caging me in, the cushions giving me no leeway to the way his cock is forcefully intruding, inch by inch down my throat. The taste is all consuming - a little salty, a little ripe, tasting like days of Joel’s old sweat, but it’s not completely bad, not what I’d have expected. It’s heady in a strange way, clouding my mind as I try to cope with the fullness in my mouth. 
The next moment I sputter, my eyes popping open wide, flooded with tears as he hits the back of my throat. I try to gasp for air and I find that I can’t. This is torture of some form, it must be. Full panic follows, where I try to move, but every avenue is pinned down in some way by Joel’s massive body. I weakly flap at him with my hands but it barely even deters him from rocking his hips in and out, choking me again on the thrust inwards as the back of my throat tightens, gagging around his thick girth. 
“Open up, relax your goddamn throat,” Joel hisses at me, keeping his cock pressed fully to the back of my throat, constricting any airflow I was hoping to have. I finally breathe shakily out of my nose when he pulls back just enough, only to slide it in slowly, his eyes carefully watching me. I glance up for the first time at him from below, hoping to find any shred of humanity he might have for me, but I’m met with an icy, dark gaze clouded with lust, power. 
“Gonna fuck your face now, like the dumb little slut you are. This is what stupid girls get for wanderin’ around by themselves. This is what they ask for.” He punctuates the last words with a sharp thrust inwards, my entire body convulsing with the gag I sputter out around him, drool pooling around my stretched lips. I would whimper if I could, if I even had the air to do so. 
Joel is relentless for the next few moments, rapid thrusts in and out of my mouth, my head held conveniently in place against the couch cushions for him. He groans deeply, his pleasure evident while I’m just trying to get my next breath in. I time them expertly, learning as I go, letting him continue to take from me to gain his own pleasure. 
“That’s it, that’s right, you’re turnin’ into quite the good girl,” Joel mutters above me, rolling his hips with vigor and making me gag again. I can feel drool dribbling down my chin, my neck, landing on my chest, and it makes me feel ashamed, embarrassed, and a twinge of something else. I can’t tell as Joel grunts, pumping himself in and out of my gruesomely contorted jaw, if the fact that it’s something even remotely sexual has me feeling things I shouldn’t. My cheeks burn hot as my eyes continue to water - how much of it is crying and how much of it is just my body’s response to him hitting the back of my throat, I don’t know.
Then he surprises me by slowing down, languid strokes of his cock in and out with sloppy sounds, a soft hand landing on my head, stroking before bundling my hair in his fist tightly. “Knew you’d have such a filthy little mouth for daddy,” he coos, rolling his hips forward a little further, touching the back of my throat with his cock. 
My body spasms a little when he keeps pushing, grumbling quiet groans of approval. My eyes squeeze shut, leaking out an onslaught of tears. I don’t want to see the aftermath if it ends up that it’s one gag too many and the inevitable happens. But to my surprise, he keeps slipping down, intruding on my throat. I try to keep my trembling body still, wanting to keep my throat relaxed, terrified of what might happen if I fight this. Can a person die this way? Could I really choke to death on this man’s dick? 
“Jesus fuck. Lord have fuckin’ mercy…” Joel breathes out as he pushes even further. “Swallowin’ him down, aren’t ya? Feel me right in here, I bet.” I flinch when he touches his hand to the column of my throat, wrapping his fingers softly around the flesh. When he starts to retreat, the choking is back in a second, but Joel holds me by the throat, keeping my neck craned back, returning to the brutal way he’d been abusing my mouth. I groan and sputter and try to cough through all of it, my mouth stuffed full over and over again before I can get a breath in. 
He’s relentless, and then it stops all at once, his cock popping out from between my lips with a wet, lewd sound. A stream of drool follows, a gush that dribbles down onto my already soaked shirt, and I cough violently, my hands flailing to clutch at my chest. 
As soon as the pressure of Joel’s body lifts off of me, I’m scrambling to somewhere, anywhere else, my limbs stiff and achy, my jaw panging with a soreness I’ve never felt before. He stands in front of me, one hand shooting out to grab the collar of my shirt before I can even get fully off the couch, pulling me close.
“Does it look like you’re done showin’ your gratitude yet?” he growls out, gripping the back of my head and forcing me to look down at his cock, still standing at full attention, shiny and dripping with saliva. I swallow hard, the lump painful on the way down. Joel shakes my head for me, the burn at my scalp making me wince. He presses his hips flush with mine, forcing his erection against my thigh before slipping it between them. He leans in close, hot breath ghosting over my face before his lips brush mine.
“You do make a pretty cocksleeve, y’know. Suckin’ cock like a cheap whore, wonder if you take it the same way in your cunt.”
I whimper, shaking my head, the tears non-stop as they roll down my cheeks. “Please… don’t. You don’t have to do this…”
Joel scoffs. “If I put my hand down your pants to that pretty little snatch, tell me I wouldn’t find you wet right now.” He punctuates the words with a sharp pull on my scalp. I cry out, lip quivering, trying to shake my head. “Don’t lie t’me after I’ve been so, so generous t’you today.”
I’m spinning around, a dizzying sensation, Joel’s strong bicep brought across my chest as his other hand delves below my waistline, plunging deep, right to my cotton panties, bypassing the waistband of those, too. Without care, without any sense of boundaries, his fingers explore, slipping through my sensitive slit with ease. I yelp, squirming at the intrusion, and Joel’s deep chuckle behind me confirms what I already knew, what I was beyond confused by.
“Thought so,” he says gruffly, then he cups my entire mound, giving an almost comforting sensation, holding his hand tightly pressed to it. “Nothin’ to be upset about, we’re just havin’ a little fun, payin’ off your debt to dear ol’ Joel, okay?”
I shake my head. “I - I shouldn't be here… it shouldn’t be like this,” I whisper in a cracking voice, hanging my head low as the tears just keep coming, damn them. 
Joel’s fingers start to move slowly, just starting with one, stroking gently up my lips, spreading my slickness around. I’m surprised that it feels good, a pleasant little tingle zipping right to my core that I quickly lament, hating myself for it. “What shouldn’t be like this, hm? That you shouldn’t like my cock down your throat? It’s perfectly natural, doll,” he says, somehow soft and condescending in the same breath.
“A-all of this,” I whimper, “Please, j-just let me go. I w-won’t say anything, I won’t do anything. I just…”
Joel quietly shushes me, letting his finger do the talking for a moment. It drags up to my clit, rubbing tiny, enticing little circles. I bite my lip hard, enough to taste copper, trying to suppress the moan climbing its way up from my chest. 
“It’s okay, it’s okay that it feels good. It’s ‘sposed to. Good little sluts like you don’t know any better, don’t care what it is that’s gettin’ their panties wet. Desperate,” he growls, fingers sliding through the slick mess that’s now drooling onto the cotton. “Just relax, let it happen…” I feel his breath, hot on my ear, before he nibbles, biting down hard on the earlobe, tugging it with his teeth. It bursts out, the whimpering moan I’d been holding back, just as he pinches my clit at the same time as the bite.
He laughs. He has the nerve to laugh and it sends a shiver down my spine, my brain muddled and confused and turned on by the eroticism at play here. He soothes me by nuzzling my neck, taking a long, deep breath in. I squirm as Joel’s hand retreats, and I wonder for just a moment, a brief, all consuming moment, if maybe he’s seen reason. When his fingers find the buttons of my jeans, my heart plummets to depths previously unknown as he unbuttons them, pulling the zipper down slowly, the only sound in the room his harsh breathing right on my neck.
“Please, I gave you what you want already,” I beg once more, feeling it fall on deaf ears as Joel tugs my jeans down, revealing my pink cotton panties. They’re my favorite pair - were my favorite pair - a rare find in a world like this. Pretty pale pink with a nice lacy trim and a little bow at the front. Only now, they’d belong to Joel.
Joel clicks his tongue in approval of the sight, pulling his head back to peer at my underwear from the back before his hand grips my ass, jiggling it roughly. “Oh, you’re jus’not getting it, are you? You feel this?” he asks angrily, letting me feel the hard length of his cock pressed to my ass cheeks, threatening to slip between my thighs. “This means you didn’t give me nearly half of what I want yet. He’s still achin’ for ya, princess.” 
I grit my teeth, hating the pet name, the way he’s using who I am to mock me. It’s a low blow. I hated everything to do with being associated with my father - I knew he wasn’t a good man - and I hated most that it was so obvious to a stranger which echelon of society I belonged to. If I was so important, where were they now, huh? I want to scream those words at him, but instead I just feel my legs tremble underneath me, my knees feeling like jelly as they almost give out on me.
“Please!” I struggle against his hold, but it only makes him grip my ass tighter, hard enough to bruise. “I-I’m a virgin,” I suddenly squeak out, unsure of why I say it other than some last ditch effort to deter him. My heart pounds as he stills, dead silent with his hand grasping my ass like it’s his next meal, like he owns it. 
“Well ain’t it my lucky day. Shit, that’s why you were sputterin’ all over my damn cock, ain’t it?” he says as the epiphany dawns on him, laughing. My cheeks blaze hotter and hotter, hating that I’m even embarrassed at my lack of experience and skills, like I have some sick need to impress him. He notices my tension, my head hanging low as I cry new tears, and says, “Hey, hey, nothin’ to be ashamed for. In fact…” His hand fists in my underwear, tight and unrelenting. I feel his cock press against my ass again, harder than ever before it slips between my thighs. “Makes me awful excited,” he purrs, bringing his mouth to my ear again.
I only give him a timid whimper in reply, squeezing my eyes shut as I realize there is nothing I can do to stop this man. He thinks I’m a cheap whore, and he loves it. I’m a pure virgin, and he loves it even more.
He squeezes me tighter to his chest, my back starting to sweat through my thin tee shirt. “The hell were you savin’ yourself for anyways? Marriage? A sweet pussy like this?” At my silence, he cups my pussy hard, letting the dampness of my underwear soak into his palm. “Answer me!” he barks out.
“I - I wasn’t! I don’t know!” I cry out, trembling.
“Well,” he says, fisting my panties again, starting to pull them down. “M’honored you’d let me be your first, sweetheart,” he drawls, and I nearly scream at the insinuation. I’m not letting him do anything. 
I start to put up more of a fight, useless against his thick arms holding me so tightly. Cool air touches my ass and the space between my thighs as he manages to shimmy my panties further down even in my struggle. I clamp my legs shut in defiance, roaring out a strained grunt as I keep trying to squirm out of his grasp. He huffs in anger, trying to subdue my writhing body before he pushes it towards the couch. I land hard, banging my knee on the hard edge that supports the cushion, wincing and trying to catch my breath. I’m practically in position for him already, ass pressed out towards him, on my hands and knees.
“Gonna make me do things the hard way, are you?” He scowls, his free hand fisting in my hair again, pulling me close.  His breath is hot over my shoulder, the sensation vile against the skin of my cheek, stained with tears. “Been too long since I found a pretty virgin like you. An’ ruinin’ this perfect, pure little cunt is jus’ the cherry on top of a perfect day f’me.” 
I feel his hard cock twitch against me, a reminder of what’s to come. The movements are quick for how bulky Joel’s body is, let alone his age, as he exchanges the hold across my chest for my wrists, bundling them behind my back. I cry out at the strain, the awkward angle he’d twisted them to, fighting him again until a hard smack lands on my ass. I scream through gritted teeth, not giving up the fight, but another thwap! rings out through the apartment, making me falter. My tender flesh screams at me in agony when he lands another spank, even harder this time, then another, until I’m crying unrelenting, fat tears.
With me rendered motionless, Joel presses down, bending me over, my balance tricky with my hands behind my back. My face nearly touches the couch, but I’m precariously held up by the wrists, the strain already making them ache. The warmth dripping between my thighs betrays me as my ass stings in residual little pulses, so raw and sore but spreading a pleasure through me that I’ve never known before. 
I don’t have time to dwell on it before Joel is grasping one hand on my hip, notching himself at my entrance. “Promise you’re gonna like this, that you’ll never be able to think of anyone else’s cock but daddy Joel’s,” he spews gruffly in my ear before he thrusts hard, one swift motion to bury himself inside of me. I scream out, the searing pain between my thighs making me wonder if I’m being split open for good, if it’s possible that some things are just too big to fit in certain places of the body. 
“Fuuuuuuck,” Joel hisses through his teeth, making the tiniest thrusting motions to ensure he’s buried deep. Every movement pierces me with a new sting as my body desperately tries to adjust, to accommodate the horrible, overwhelming intrusion. “You were not kiddin’, sweetheart. Tightest fuckin’ pussy I’ve ever been in.”
I sob, unable to speak, unable to move as Joel thrusts brutally from the get go, his hips snapping with force, crashing into mine hard enough to bruise. The lewd sounds we make disgust me, because I know I’m part of those sounds, my body enjoying the filthy things he’s saying, the way he’s taking me without remorse. He pulls himself out, clicking his tongue as he peers down between our bodies. “Christ, you are one sexy little bird. Poor little virgin bleedin’ on daddy’s cock.”
The thought horrifies me, making my stomach turn. “Please,” I cry out, my body rocking with the motions as he starts to fuck me again, the strain on my wrists as Joel uses them to help thrust himself inside of me starting to gnaw deeper into them. I’m like a ragdoll with the way he’s jerking me by my wrists, my body having no choice but to flail in time with the movements so that he can press himself deep on each cruel thrust inwards.
“You want more? You beggin’ already?” Joel grunts between his heavy breaths, sounding so cocky it makes me want to spin around and punch him. I settle for gritting my teeth instead, feeling my body slowly but surely melding into his. When Joel presses me down further, forcing an arch in my back, I whimper when his cock hits something sensitive, deep, primal. Fuck, is it something. 
“Oh, that’s it. We got her now, don’t we?” he says from above, continuing to stroke his cock along that spot repeatedly. I feel myself losing my will to fight, hating the pleasure but feeling myself lean into it slightly, my hips pressing back to meet his nearly against my will. “You ever come before, sweetheart?” He leans in a little closer to ask the question, the pistoning of his hips slowing the slightest bit.
I refuse to answer, tears pooling in my eyes. I don’t want him to take this from me, I don’t want him to know anything about me. He jerks my wrists at the same time he slams his hips into me, and I whimper loudly, feeling the way he’s surely bruising my insides. 
“If you ain’t figured it out yet, the rules are that you answer me when I’m askin’ you a question if you know what’s good for ya,” he spits out, and I shake my head, letting it hang limply.
“Use your words. Say ‘no, daddy’,”  he says with sinister condescension, stroking his own ego.
“N-no… daddy…” I say, my tongue revolting against the words, bile climbing up my throat.
He moves his hand to my head, stroking carefully and softly. “Oh, that’s a shame. That’s a daaaamn shame. All pent up, y’are. But daddy will make it all better.” He sounds deranged, sick, like he truly believes that I’m thankful to him for what he’s doing to me. I can’t answer, my mouth gaping open just as he releases my wrists, letting me fall to the couch with a thud. My open mouth gets a mouthful of the cushions, making me sick over the fact that it’s probably full of god knows what due to its age and whatever things Joel seems to get up to in this apartment of his.
I blink as Joel grips tightly at my hips, wondering why he suddenly trusts my hands to be free, when it happens. He thrusts into that spot again, harsh and unforgiving, and I nearly see stars behind my eyes as the head of his cock punches against things I didn’t even know were there. That’s why. I’m incapacitated at this angle, brutally forced to enjoy the pleasure washing over my body as Joel takes from me, actually giving in return this time.
I bite my tongue hard, not wanting to give him any satisfaction for the tiny moans that are growing louder in my throat, desperate to be let out.
“Let me hear you, princess. Daddy doesn’t do with quiet girls. I can feel you clampin’ down on my cock, know you’re lovin’ how I use you up like you were meant for it.”
I shake my head in protest, but a strangled sound escapes past my tight lips when Joel slams into me harder than he has yet, puffing hard as he fucks me like a greedy animal. He chuckles through heavy breaths, little whispers of that’s it, come on, take it, flow freely from his nasty mouth. 
I feel myself slip away, further gone from reality as the warmth spreads from my pelvis into my belly, coiling tight. Everything tingles, set on fire, the spot where Joel handles my hips with his fat fingers practically burning with a constant mix of pleasure and pain. I cry out when Joel’s cock pulls that feeling out from deep inside of me again, half a sob and half a moan as it crescendos, waves of pleasure crashing over me.
Joel’s grunts of approval, so brutish and debauched, sends a new wave of arousal through me. I tremble, eyes squeezed shut with my body completely out of my control, taken over by this boundless bliss. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever felt before: heavenly warmth worlds above any of the pleasures I’ve known. This had to be what Joel was referring to, urging me towards, telling me he wanted to make me come. This had to be what I was missing out on all these years, hiding myself away. Was this the reason sex was so coveted, so sought after? Was this feeling… the reason he’s doing what he is to me right now?  
It feels like it’s never ending, my body so rigid as it spasms yet pliant as he fucks into me harder and harder. I loathe the noises I’m making that intermingle with his as I squeeze my eyes shut, enjoying it.
“Fuck, fuck - that’s it - f-fuck knew you’d love it. Come on my cock, baby, that’s right.” Joel’s string of praises reach my ears as I come down from my high, limp and yielding to whatever it is he wants to do to me now. I have no fight - my bones turned to jelly, my body sore all over, my throat scratchy from the way he’d assaulted it earlier. I only have it in me to give the rest of myself over, whether I like it or not. 
“S-so fuckin’ tight, lettin’ me take your virginity like a good little whore,” he punches out, pounding into my sensitive cunt like it’s saving his soul, like it’s the only thing he could ever care about. I’m on the precipice of coming again, my nerves still frayed and on edge from the last one. A smaller but still powerful climax takes over, my body shuddering and tight, milking every last second of the pleasure. 
“Gonna blow my load into this pure little pussy, make it mine - fuck - gonna fill you up like the cocksleeve you are. P-probably never want to be without my fuckin’ load drippin’ out of you again. I-I’m close, fuck -” Joel rambles as he ruts his hips deep, one final thrust and a grunt, and I feel him stall, pulsing into me. 
It’s all suddenly very still, an eerie quiet settling over the room. My entire body burns hot, the only thing keeping me from collapsing is Joel’s hands still anchored on my hips as he leaves his cock inside of me, plugging me up. I want to cry again at the sudden, overwhelming shame I feel, but I can’t give him the satisfaction. I can’t.
Joel pats my ass a few times, pulling out. I tremble hard, falling forward onto the couch without his hold, instantly curling in on myself. I resent the way I’d noticed how empty I felt the second he was gone, how cold my body was without his warmth pressed into it. I dare to peer up at the sick man who stands above me, catching his breath, watching just as the last bit of his softening cock gets tucked back into his jeans. He swipes a hand across his forehead, gathering sweat, staring down at me with a darkened expression, grinning cockily.
When he plops down on the couch next to me, picking up the can of beans he’d been eating before, my mouth hangs open in surprise at how casual he’s acting. I watch his face shine with sweat, his breathing still labored, but everything else about his attitude would indicate he didn’t just force himself on me. 
I try to keep my expression neutral for my own safety as I feel something leak out of me, not even wanting to give him the smug satisfaction of having to confirm my suspicions about what it is. I do my best to position my body so he can’t see between my legs as I try to pull my underwear up from where they sit near my knees, my jeans following. Joel only gives me a knowing glance as he takes a bite, conscious of the fact that a part of him sits inside my now soiled underwear, and a part of me now sits inside of his soul. 
He shoves the can my way and I shrink back at his sudden motion, not taking it from him. “Eat. I ain’t havin’ you all weak and despondent for the next time.”
I feel my heart sink down past my ass, my stomach plummeting along with it as nausea overtakes me, a dizzying sensation clouding my vision. He couldn’t have said what I think he did. I - I’d paid my debt, whatever it was he thought I owed him for saving me when I didn’t even ask him to. For saving me and then doing exactly what that man had planned to do anyways under the guise of a caring, noble rescuer.
“N-next time…?” I manage to make my mouth move, my throat to produce a sound, pushing the question out in a voice that doesn’t sound like my own.
“Know you said not to call you stupid but my house, my rules, an’ sweetheart…” He looks at me under his raised, expectant brows. “My stupid, stupid girl. Did you really think that would be enough? That I’d get an opportunity every man dreams of - an untouched, perfect pussy like yours, to keep all for m’self, and throw it all away?” He’s creeping closer as he speaks, shrouding me on the couch with his huge frame, caging in where I lay, my body wound as tightly as it can to itself to block whatever he’s thinking of doing next. “Now you don’t think daddy is that dumb to let you go knowin’ all that, do you?”
I sit stunned silent underneath him, wide eyes fixed in a tortured gaze on his rugged face, but his hand squeezing my thigh is warning enough for me to shake my head, stuttering out an answer. “N-no. No…” I whisper. 
Two approving pats on my cheek send Joel slinking back slightly, his dark, unhinged eyes staring holes into me as they roam over my body. Despite nothing even visible - my chest hidden underneath my arms and legs clamped tightly - I feel violated, objectified. 
Terror rips through my chest as reality settles in slowly but surely. I look at the man I’d trusted once, who’d shown himself to be a friend, or at the least an ally, currently feasting his eyes on me like I’m a product. Which now, I suppose I am. A whore. His whore.
“Now,” he says, licking his lips, that hungry gaze already returning, a bulge appearing in his jeans and stretching the fabric. “All I’ve got to do is decide just how long I’ll keep ya for.”
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arahdow · 9 months ago
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BE CAREFUL WITH YOUR QUILLS !
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Pairing. Sonic x reader, Shadow x reader, Silver x reader, Knuckles x reader
Content. fem!reader. fluff, tiny silly argument in shadow’s, cuddling, overall soft stuff.
Word count. 1.6 k
A/N. writing sonic was the hardest thing i’ve ever done aH idk why!! i’ll make sure to write him more often to get used to his personality aH anywaaay, again, not beta read, i’m really sacrificing my sleep hours for this one sjdjs hope y’all like it!!
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SONIC
making you run and accidentally crashing with him.
“Come on! You’re being too slow!” Sonic screamed as he kept on running, his feet moving way too fast for her liking. 
Just a few days ago, the blue hedgehog encouraged his partner to go out for a run together, and she knew he was an athletic man, but this? This was torture.
“Sonic… Wait… I can’t” her feet were moving so slow compared to his, especially when she wasn’t used to running this much. 
“One foot in front of the other! Come on!” Sonic said laughing, as he ran backwards, looking at the girl. She huffed with annoyance, the hedgehog still winning even when running like that!
After a while, the blue animal ran faster and almost disappeared from her sight. The girl took a deep breath and started running faster. Somehow, the fear of getting lost in the forest making her move, helping with adrenaline. Suddenly her body was moving faster than before. Way faster! 
Her body, sadly, started to grow tired quickly because of the energy she was using. Her lower limbs suddenly getting wobbly, but somehow kept running. Out of instinct, she thought.
That was until she realized she was about to crash into a stone wall at the end of the road, it was getting dangerously close!
The girl stretched her arms to cushion the blow. A violent ‘Hey!’ was all she could hear as she crashed, not on a stone wall, but rather a soft body. Sonic’s body to be clear.
He used his own body to soften the crash, but something was wrong.
“Ouch! Wha-”
She looked down and saw one of Sonic’s blue quills stuck on her shoulder. “Damn… Ouch.” 
The animal was sprawled upon her, but quickly recovered to take a look at his injured girlfriend. “Oh, I’m sorry darling,” he said with a sheepish smile, helping her stand up, careful not to mess with the quill. “but it’s kinda your fault to run that fast, thought you were about to destroy time and spac- Ouch! Why are you hitting me!” He said with a pained laugh.
“You’re an asshole! Help me get this out!” She complained, annoyed that the man was making fun of her.
“Aw, don’t be all grumpy, I promise not to make you run again.” He said, pushing her slightly to take her to the infirmary. “Hey, maybe next time you can try Shadow’s air shoe-”
“Don’t even finish that thought.”
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SHADOW
silly old couple argument
“Move.” The girl didn’t reply, her gaze focused on the tv. “Get up.”
“Git ip.” she mocked.
The black hedgehog grumbled, sitting really close to her, almost on her.
“Hey-”
“This is my side of the couch, you know that.” He said as he crossed his arms. “I don’t like this channel.”
“You don’t like anything, Shadow.” She complained, not giving him the remote.
They’ve been living together for a year, two years being a couple, and they still bickered like an old couple. It became something usual between them, and it got even worse when speaking of the sofa. There was only this purple sofa in the living room, both her and Shadow liked it, but there was just something about the spot on the far left that was perfect. For both of them.
So if they were together in the house, it was usual for them to fight over the sofa spot, like they were doing now.
“I’m feeling hot, you need to get off of me!”
“I’m not on you, you’re the one occupying my place!”
“Shadow!” she pushed the hedgehog with her shoulder, as he pressed even harder on her.
With a huff, she turned and put her hands on him to push him again, when a quill suddenly pinched her hand. 
“Ow!” She exclaimed, looking at the dark quill stuck on her. “You can have your stupid place on the couch!” the girl said as she stuck her tongue and got up to the kitchen, looking for some tweezers to take the quill out.
Not many long after, the man got into the kitchen, following her, taking her arm in his hand. “Hey-”
“I’m sorry.” He said, looking intently at the sensitive red spot on her hand. Pressing his lips, he brought her hand under the faucet to clean the wound. “It wasn’t my intention to hurt you. Please forgive me.” 
The girl snorted. “It’s alright though, I was just messing with you, but you were seriously pressed, huh? Pressed enough to hurt me.” She said with a fake tone of hurt on her voice.
Shadow rolled his eyes. “You’re not gonna let this down, are you?”
She gasped and whined, putting on a pouty face, “Ow! It hurts! Please! Why are you so mean to me?”
“Alright alright, you can have the couch for today.” He sighed, shaking his head with humor.
The girl smiled, her face expression going back to normal. Turning happily, the girl kissed his cheek before running to the couch. “Love you, Shads!” 
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SILVER
cuddling after a long day but uh oh…
After a tiring day outside, he wanted nothing more than to be at home, eat the food his girl made for him and spend time with her. It was a simple plan, and the cherry on top? Cuddling with her on bed, his face pressed on her stomach as she threaded his quills.
It was a usual occurrence, both of them lying down in silence, sometimes him laying on her lap, sometimes her on his, but they spent most of their time cheek to cheek.
“Silver…” She whispered, afraid of disturbing him. But he didn’t reply, instead, a soft snore broke his silence.
The girl giggled a bit as she kept on caressing his face and quills. It was times like this where she found herself falling once again for her hedgehog lover. She was actually reading a book on her other hand, so her attention was mostly directed to it.
Being immersed on the story, she got really focused on the sentences, suddenly drifting off from her task on her other hand. She unconsciously made her limb move in erratic ways, as she tried to keep on doing both things at the same time.
That was until she felt a slight sting on her hand. Jolting, she yelped as she retreated her hand from his body. The movement was so sudden, Silver opened his sleepy eyes, sensing something wrong.
Leaning back enough so he could see his partner in the eye, he found instead a look of slight pain as she held her hand in front of her face, a silverish quill stuck on her palm.
“Oh chaos, dear, your hand!” He expressed, incorporating as he held her hand for a bit. Using his telekinesis, he brought the aid kit to bed. Doing a careful procedure, he took the quill out from her hand, making her hiss at the feeling.
“I’m sorry…” He said.
“Don’t be, it was my fault, I was completely distracted by the story.” She replied, looking at the book beside her.
Silver took a look, as he kept patching her hand. “Hey! That’s the book I recommended the other day!” 
“It is! And it’s so good! I really loved it when the protagonist saved the kids from the falling building.” 
“That was my favorite part too!” He said. Both of them laughed and kept on talking about the book. He was really happy to have her in his life.
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KNUCKLES
It’s shedding season! And your roomie-bf is in the house!
Cleaning after an echidna warrior was difficult, especially when he kept bringing his dirty shoes inside her home, her food taken, and her bed occupied. But she honestly loved Knuckles company, so she carried on with it.
It was starting to get a whole lot colder outside, as the temperature began to cool down. It was that time of the year where the island became a little snowglobe, so the echidna spent more time at her partner’s home than anywhere else.
Today she needed to do the laundry, piles of dirty clothes started to form, and even though Knuckles tried to convince her to stop using clothes like him, that still wasn’t on her plans, at least not on a short term.
Sighing, she started to walk towards the laundry room, a pile of white clothes on her arms, making seeing the floor almost impossible. Knuckles was sleeping in her room, so she let him. She’ll make him fold the clothes afterwards either way. Sure, she’d let him crash whenever he needed it, but it came with a price.
Opening the door of the room, the girl stepped inside. But she wasn't ready to feel an electric pain coursing from the bottom of her feet to her core. A scared scream left her throat as the pile of clothes fell from her hands. Tripping, the girl fell on her butt with a thud. Not a second later, the echidna was already punching the laundry’s room door, breaking it. His breathing agitated as he saw his significant other on the floor.
“What happened?” He asked, worried that someone might have come into her home. 
The girl crawled, starting to search in between the clothes as she stumbled upon a red quill. Taking it in between her fingers, she showed it to the animal, furrowed eyebrows on her face.
Knuckles saw the quill with curious eyes. “You stepped on a quill of mine?” 
She threw the quill at him, half annoyed. “Of course I did! Don’t go around shedding your stuff please. Look! Now my foot hurts because of it.” She said as she looked at her now destroyed door. “And that too!” The mammal listened to her words, and before she could complain for anything else, he got closer to take the girl in his arms, an easy task for him, and brought her to the sofa. Laying her down, he put a gloved hand on his own chest.
“I’ll take care of the laundry to compensate for it.” He oathed, the girl surprised for his serious face, snorting in the process.
“That’d be nice.” She said, as she looked at her foot, not swollen or anything. “I could help you though-”
“No, you stay there.” He demanded as he strided to the laundry room.
A moment later, he came back stomping to the living room again. 
“Uhm… How does the machine that washes clothes works?”
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gallavichsreddie1128 · 6 months ago
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Admit You Don’t Hate Me (Wolverine)
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Description: Nearly hate sex between Y/N and Logan
Warning: Smutty
Word Count: 568
Request: can you please write hate sex with logan and fem! reader??? i love all the logan stuff you’ve made.
“Look at you begging me to touch ya. Thought ya hated me?” He teases as Y/N stares up at him with pleading eyes. What an asshole. He had her right where he wanted her. “No words? Not a thought in that head, is there babe?” He asked her as his hands ghosted her soaking wet panties. She whimpered and pushed her hips up to meet his hands but he pulled them away causing her to whine. He chuckled, a deep sexy chuckle. “Logan please.” She moaned as he stared at her.
She was practically falling apart and if he didn’t give it to her now she might die. His hands finally grabbed her thighs, spreading them apart so he could have full access. He looked down to see that her panties were soaked and he laughed, “You hate me so much that it turns you on, doesn’t it?” He says and yanks them down her legs. She gasped as the cool air hit her pussy.
She had never been this wet in her life. He leaned down and blew on her causing her to shiver. “You do have a nice pussy.” He says and runs a finger up her clit. She bit back a whine, not wanting to seem desperate but unfortunately she already was. “Don’t hide those sweet noises for me now. Let the man you hate know that he can take care of you.” He whispered in her ear before gently biting it. His finger made full contact with her clit and started rubbing.
He was teasing her with his slow pace but he would call her ungrateful if she was to complain. Her mouth was open and the dirty sounds were spilling from it. Though Logan knew how sensitive the clit was, “I’m barely giving you anything and you fall apart from a little rub? Pathetic, truly.” He said. She wanted to hit him but was too far lost in pleasure to do that.
His other hand moved to cup one of her breasts and massage it. She gasped his name not caring about how that would boost his ego. “Just 2 hours ago you were screaming about how much you hate me and how I should go back to my universe. Now look at ya, begging to be fucked.” He said and started rubbing her clit faster. It was embarrassing how close she was to cumming. He could tell by the pulse of her clit and her whines that she was close.
“Admit to me right now that you don’t hate me and that I’m making you feel good or you don’t get to cum right now.” He says and even though she wants it bad, “I do hate you. I can hate you and want to fuck you at the same time.” She manages out. He stops rubbing her clit and lets go of her nipple. “Is that so?” He asked and she looked up at him with a glare. He took off his pants and boxers as she stared at how big he is. “I’ve been with bigger. There was no need to prepare me.” He smiled at that. “I highly doubt that bub and I wasn’t preparing ya, I was teasing ya.” He lines himself up with her dripping wet entrance. “You just can’t admit that you want my cock even though within a few seconds you’ll be screaming for it.”
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misctf · 5 months ago
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Singing a New Tune
Written for Occam's 2000 Follower Writing Challenge
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“Babe, I love you.”
Jared smiled down at Julie, as she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him deeply. He had to imagine his girlfriend dreamed of this moment. A romantic kiss at a Tiffany Stabina concert as the star finished out her set with one of Julie’s favorite songs. A slow romantic song- one that Jared knew all too well from frequent replays in the car.  
“Anything for you babe.” He replied, holding her closely in his muscular arms, “I love you too.”
This certainly wasn’t his kind of music. And he didn’t understand the cult-like devotion to Tiffany. But seeing Julie this happy? Worth it. Still, he imagined the other straight dudes here were thinking similarly. In fact, he and the guy next to him shared several looks throughout the night. A silent comradery acknowledging they’d rather be elsewhere. And if they had been elsewhere, Jared would’ve asked the guy for his arm day routine.
“Alright babe, we ought to head out before...”
“To all my fans, I love you!” Tiffany called out, their cheers drowning Jared’s words, “You’ve all been with me from the beginning, and I am so grateful.” She placed a hand over her heart, “But you all know I’ve been criticized.” The fans all booed, “And they’ve come after you too.”
“A bit dramatic.” Jared chuckled, earning a glare from Julie.
“You wouldn’t get it.” She replied, “They go after he for everything.” The jock nodded, not wanting to risk ruining their perfect night, “But when she sings, it’s like she’s speaking directly to you. People just don’t get it.” Jared nodded. There were some things just not worth it.
“I wasn’t going to do this, but I have a new song for you all this evening!” The crowd erupted in screams and applause. Jared groaned, “They say I’m pandering? Then I’ll pander.” She continued, and the crowd got louder.
Jared knew there would be no way of getting Julie to leave now. And he silently dreaded the hours they’d be stuck in traffic. But as the song started and Tiffany’s words echoed through the stadium, his thoughts slowed.
“They say I only cater to a few.”
Jared felt lightheaded, the sound of the crowd growing distant.
“The gays and the girls, oh boo hoo.”
“Julie?” He whispered, but she didn’t respond, “Julie, please...” He felt sick. The world was spinning, everything becoming black, “Fuck, fuck, fuck...” He whispered. He couldn’t move. Was he dying? Was this it?
“But I won’t back down, I won’t apologize.” Jared looked up and saw her. Tiffany Stabina. Standing in front of him, “For making them feel alive.” She strutted towards the helpless jock.
“What...? How is this...?”
“I see you dancing in the dark, feeling completely torn apart.” She sang.
Jared yelped as he felt a cool breeze caress him. And to his horror, he realized he was nude. Butt naked in front of Tiffany Stabina no less. She grinned and approached him, circling his nude figure and wrapping her arms around him.
“Embrace your uniqueness, don’t hide.”
Jared gasped as she placed pressure on his shoulders. He felt the floor getting closer as he lost inch after inch of height. He now stood at eye level with the 5’6” popstar.
“Wait? What did you do to me?” He yelped.
“Now let my music take you for a ride.”
She ran a hand along his muscular arms. Her very touch sent a wave of pleasure straight to his dick, and he blushed as all 10 inches stood at attention. Tiffany smirked, but continued rubbing his biceps and triceps. Her sensual touch was intoxicated, and Jared watched helplessly as his proud muscles started to diminish. His biceps atrophied, followed quickly by his triceps. His slender arms giving off the appearance they hadn’t seen a gym in years. He tried to cry out, but Tiffany placed a finger to his lips, effectively silencing him. He could only watch as her hands roamed his impressive pecs. He had always been proud of his pecs, and he loved when Julie rested her head on his chest. But now, he could only watch as they flattened away.
“Wait...” He was able to force out. But Tiffany was relentless, and her hands roamed down his abs.
He shed a few tears as his abs vanished, leaving him with a flat, slender tummy. There was no way this could be happening. It had to be some type of acid trip or something. Jared kept trying to reassure himself, even as she moved to his legs and quickly destroyed his muscular thighs and calves, leaving his legs slender and dainty. His feet followed, and quickly diminished from size 13s to 9.5s in mere seconds.
“My music is my contagion, unapologetic. Now we’re gonna collide.” Tiffany continued, this time wrapping her hands around his cock, “My fans are my tribe, I won’t divide.”
Jared felt like the wind was knocked out of him from both the pain and pleasure from her touch. And he watched as she shrunk his proud member. The young jock always knew he was well endowed. And he knew how to use it too. But as he watched his dick shrink from its proud ten inches to a mere 3 inches hard, he felt his confidence diminish.
“We’ll rise together, side by side.”
Her hands made their way to his flat ass. He tried to crane his neck to see what she was about to do. But he didn’t need to see. He could immediately feel his ass expand in her hands, filling them with firm, yet jiggly fat and muscle. He let out a moan as she caressed his basketball-sized ass cheeks, and he nearly came when she gave one a firm slap.
“Pl-please stop...” He begged as she placed a hand over his neck, “You can't do thith...” His voice cracked and he winced, “What’th happening to my voithe? Why do I thound like thith?” He begged, his voice cracking, “No, thith doethn't thound right.” His voice settled a few octaves higher, his masculine tone now lost forever.
“So bring on the hate, let the critics rage. We’ll keep on dancing, it’s time to turn the page.”
As she continued to caress his now slender body, and grind against him, he felt off. His dick  softened, as her physicality became less appealing to him. Her bouncing boobs and thick lips didn’t seem to do it for him. Even her touch was losing its pleasure. And he realized in terror what was occurring.
“No, not thith!” He begged, “Come on, come, think of thomething.” He remembered the BJ Julie gave him last night, and even the lesbian porn he watched a few days ago. But his measly member stayed soft, “No... pleathe...”
He felt Tiffany’s hand on his head. His pleading eyes met hers, and he knew he’d find no mercy. His hair restyled itself, and he felt a piercing pain in his left earlobe, which suddenly adourned a diamond stud. But her touch was doing far more than making a few style alterations. In his mind, his memories were shifting. Showering after football practice? Changing in the locker room after a lifting session with his bros? Watching football with his family?
“Oh god...” He moaned, as his small dick hardened and his ass throbbed with need.
He didn’t play football. He got fucked by the quarterback in the shower after a game. He wasn’t lifting at the gym. He was doing cardio and sucking off the gym bros between their sets. He didn’t watch sports like football. He just sat and scrolled on his phone, reading up on the latest Tiffany Stabina gossip and scrolling his socials. And as his new reality cemented itself, Jared’s eyes lost their intelligent spark and became half-lidded, his brain filling with celebrity gossip and how to please guys.
“This contagion’s here to stay, and we’ll celebrate it every day.”
She kissed him on the cheek. And with that, Jared was back. The cheers of the crowd filling his ears, as Tiffany thanked her fans and left the stage. Jared smiled.
“Oh my god! That wath tho amathing!” He cheered, “Tiffany! I love you!” He yelled, “It wath like Tiffany thpoke to me.”
“You felt that way too?” Jared turned and came face to face with a man of similar build. Albeit with slightly bigger arms, “Tiffany, like, totally thpeakth for uth.” He grinned as Jared felt up his arms.
“Wait!” A voice called out behind him, “Did you see the guy I came here with?” Julie asked, looking around desperately, “I swear, he was right here. I...”
“Thorry thithter, I hope you find him!” Jared replied, turning his attention back to the guy.
“Tho weird, thome poor girl athked me about her boyfriend too.” The man replied, “Probably got drunk and left to watch football.”
“OMG tho lame.” Jared laughed. The two smiled at one another, “Tho, like...”
“Wanna go back to my place? I have her latetht album.” The man winked, and Jared shuddered as his ass throbbed with need.
“That thounds delightful.” Jared replied, pulling the man in closer, his smile widening as the man squeezed his ass, “Oh! But like firtht I totally need a thelfie! I want everyone to know I thupport Tiffany and Tiffany thupports me!” He cheered, capturing their kiss on camera and posting it to his socials.
Later that night, Jared and his lover explored one another’s new bodies. Jared gasping at the size of his lover’s cock, moaning as he felt a firm hand squeeze his ass. His moans would continue to fill the room that night. With each thrust of his new lover’s dick, Jared was in heaven. Unaware of his former life or the horror it would bring his former self to see him like this. Just another horny slut- another gay twink dedicated to Tiffany Stabina.
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sweatervest-obsessed · 5 months ago
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Last, Last Time
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader (she/her pronouns)
WC: ~7.3k
TW: Angst, guns, violence, mentions of domestic violence, blood, swearing, depression, kidnapping, manipulation, self-deprecating thoughts, heartbreak, arguing, the grieving process, drinking, screaming, crying, sobbing, throwing up, being under pressure, and anything else that comes with a criminal minds episode.
a/n: based on S15 E6 - first date. I love u aubrey plaza <3. Also inspired by the song Last, Last Time by Boys Go To Jupitar. writing this was a little bit of a catharsis since it's one of the first things I've been able to write. I'm sorry I've been so m.i.a., i just moved to a new country and that has been a crazy experience. But to cope with that, enjoy some gut-wrenching angst!
Alternate Ending! Spencer Masterlist
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“Spencer I won’t—I can’t keep doing this. I’m sick of arguing in circles.” 
“Y/n…”
“I-I feel like you take me for fucking granted Spencer. All I do is work and then come home and wait for you to actually be able to, I don’t know, sleep in the same bed as me for more than four hours.”
The look in his eyes almost took you out but your heart had already been broken long, long before this argument. If anything, you were starting to feel this sense of freedom as you broke his heart. 
“Please. Y/n. Just–I don’t—Just give me a few days to convince Hotch to let me have some time off and we can work on this please.” 
“Wait for the potential of us?” 
Spencer’s jaw loosened. You couldn’t read beyond the initial layer of pain and confusion, which made your chest ache since not too long ago you could have been able to find everything you needed in his expression.
“God Spencer this can’t be fucking news to you. We’ve been drifting apart for months now.” 
“I know, I know. You have been so patient with me and I’ve just been….there was that whole thing with Cat and then….I-I was trying so hard y/n…”
“No, first there was that whole thing with Maeve.”
“That’s not fair—”
“Oh that’s not fair? Really? You’re going to tell me the entire Maeve thing isn’t fair to you?”
“I’m sorry.”
You sighed and closed your eyes. “I’m not saying you weren’t trying but come one Spencer. There’s no need to deny this shit anymore. I hate it when you lie to me about these kinds of things.” 
Spencer’s hand came up to his face and it dragged down, aging him significantly with the fatigue written all over his face. 
“So you’re just going to pack up everything, break my heart, and leave? Were you even going to say goodbye, or was I going to come home to an empty home. A note or....” 
“I-I don’t know Spencer. I just don’t…” 
The tears were starting to creep in, and you had to place the box down before you lost it.
“This isn’t easy for me either…” Your chest heaved. 
The both of you stood in silence, tension simmering surrounding the both of you like heat on a summer’s eve. Neither of you could really look at one another, but it felt wrong to look at anything else. Something was missing but you couldn’t say it outloud. You knew you would always love Spencer Reid but this time it was not enough. 
“I’m tired of arguing Spencer.” 
Your eyes met his. You felt Spencer’s arms around you before you could even feel the tears hit your cheeks. Your arms immediately went to his neck, so familiar. No longer home. 
Spencer’s voice muttered into your ear. “Don’t cry Jolie. It’ll be okay..” 
About three years ago, Spencer had decided that he didn’t like that you had nicknames for him, and he had none for you. He spent weeks workshopping different ones : Sugar, Honey, Pumpkin, Sweetheart, Darlin, Pookie, Lover, Sunny (like sunshine), Sunshine—it was a wild few weeks trying to figure out who he was talking to. Then one day, offhandedly, he was trying to tell you about this french film he had been watching, and trying to get Emily to watch with him. 
He called you ‘tres jolie’, and blushing you had asked him what it meant. He told you it meant pretty. 
And it stuck. 
Now? It stung. 
All you could do was squeeze tightly onto him, not ready to let go.
“You’re so pretty when you’re lying through your teeth.” You whispered after a few moments, pulling away out of his arms. 
“I.” You swallow and step back, out of his reach. “Maybe I’ll...” 
Spencer just looked up at the ceiling, trying to hold in the tears that were streaming down his face. 
You grabbed the last box on the counter and your keys, and walked out, for the last time. 
You awoke in your bed, eyes adjusting to the complete darkness the blackout curtains provided you. 
Another fucking night thinking about your decision those four years ago, and how your life may have gotten better because of it. 
Moving to get up from the bed, you decided to leave the curtains closed for now, feeling as if you could melt from the sun touching you. 
You turned on the bathroom light and started your morning routine. Wash face. Take meds. Brush teeth. Fix hair—
Somewhere in that process, you got lost, and just stared at yourself in the mirror. You weren’t sure for how long. All you could do was replay the last four years. 
Did you make the right choice? You were happy, you had your dream job. 
Maybe it was true what they say, you can only have a career or love, but not both—
The only thing taking you out of this spiral was the ringer on your phone going off. 
This caused some hesitation because your phone’s ringer was always off––the loud noise startling you. There were only a few people who had that emergency bypass, and none of them had called you in four years. 
You peaked out of the bathroom and saw the name light up on your phone. 
Emily Prentiss
______________________________________________________________
The door to the round room opened up and in walked Spencer Reid. “Catch me up.” 
Prentiss clicked the remote, and the TV lit up with a picture of a woman smirking facing the camera while holding a gun up to another one next to her. “Early this morning, Garcia got an email from an anonymous server.”
The second woman was tied up, mouth slightly open, and eyes filled with tears, while a man on the other side just had his eyes closed, tired. . 
Spencer just stared at the photo. 
Rossi nodded at the picture. “She's not obscuring her face, telling us she's got nothing to hide.”
He never pulled focus away from the screen, mouth dry at the thought of what today was going to be. “Any ideas on the unsub?”
“No.” Prentiss sighed. “Only the unsub's demand. That we release Catherine Adams in 24 hours.  I'm having her transferred here for questioning, but we have no illusions. This is just a game to her. We know that. The question is, do we want to play it or not?”
______________________________________________________________
Receiving a call from the FBI was not entirely new to you, since you had been engaged to one of their agents, but receiving one now? Weird. Off brand. Something was deeply wrong from them to have to give you a call. 
You hesitantly pick up the phone. “Hello?”
“Hey Y/n, it’s Emily Prentiss—“
“I know who you are, Emily. It’s been a couple years, not millions.” 
Emily hummed a brief laugh, and you could hear other voices behind her, unable to make out anything. 
“I know this is hard to ask of you, but would you stay on the phone with me and come in?” 
“What?” 
“I need you to stay very calm Y/n, but I need you to stay on the line with me, leave your apartment as soon as you can, and get to the BAU.” 
“Oh my god I totally forgot. It might take me an hour to get there with all this bullshit traffic, could we push the reservation an hour? Would they be willing to do that?” 
Your entire tone changed, having remembered what Spencer had told you all those years ago about if people were listening into your apartment, if they bugged your car—all paranoia that didn’t pay off then, might be paying off now. 
You were sure you could hear Emily sigh, and it sounded a little upset at the fact that you knew what to do–you knew how to handle a dangerous situation, which made her question everything in her life. 
Quickly you pulled on a pair of jeans and threw a sweatshirt over your pajama top and grabbed your keys off of the counter. 
You left your apartment, waved to one of your neighbors, and hopped into your car, still on the line, just trying not to panic. Maybe something went wrong, maybe Spencer wasn’t okay, maybe he had died—you refused to even acknowledge that thought and decided it was something else entirely. 
It was a very tense hour of driving, that was only about forty minutes since you knew how to drive above the speed limit. 
You realized that it was past midday, and you had taken full advantage of the weekend. So at least you had a decent amount of sleep under your belt for what felt like the beginning of an extraneous night. 
As you pulled into the parking garage, Emily Prentiss and someone you had never met before were standing there waiting for you. You placed your car in park, hopped out and walked up to them–only hanging up as soon as you were out of the car. 
Both of them had such grim looks on their faces, but at least they were trying to pretend like the situation wasn’t as bad as it appeared to your face. 
Emily engulfed you in a hug. “Missed you Y/n. It’s been too long.” 
“Well Em, next time I end an engagement with someone I’ll consider your feelings first.” You squeezed him back, dryly laughing at your own joke. At least it caused Emily to snort. 
“Y/n this is SSA Luke Alvez. Luke, this is Y/n Y/l/n.”
“It’s nice to meet you.” He gave a small smile and nodded at you.
“I wish it were under different circumstances.” You nodded back and looked over at Emily.
“Let’s head inside?” 
The three of you moved inside. 
Sure, you hadn’t been here in a while, but you knew your way around the BAU Bullpen if your life depended on it, which was ironic since that was what this feels like. 
As soon as you were safely in their round table room, Luke shut the door, and stood by it, Emily coming and sitting down next to you. 
“What do you know about Cat Adams?” 
That bitch. 
______________________________________________________________
“I would like to go on a date. With you.” 
Spencer stared at her, face stoic as ever. “A date?”
“Yes. I want to look pretty. And I want to have fun.” She looked him up and down. “And I won't even get physical, ok? Unless you want me to.”
Spencer sat down across from her. “Come here. Closer.”
Cat leaned in, a small smile on her face, absolutely intoxicated by being so close to him.
“The only date that I'll be there for is the one where they stick a needle in your vein.”
Cat scoffed. “You're just going to let her father and sister die? I don't think so.”
“I never said it was a father and daughter. You're already slipping.” He stood up from the table. “We'll find them. We always do.”
Cat leaned back and crossed her arms. “Not tonight. Tonight I win.”
His resolution had yet to change, “The score between me and you is two to zero. By tomorrow morning, it'll be a clean sweep. Enjoy eternal nothingness. It's a metaphor for your life.” 
And with that, the door slammed shut behind him.
______________________________________________________________
Both the profilers watched a series of emotions run rampant across your face, before you settled on a somewhat displeased smile. “A lot.” 
They exchanged a look, and you didn’t have the energy to pretend like you didn’t know what it was. 
“Don’t start with me you two. I know profiling. I know what you’re doing. Ask me the questions you want to ask. Don’t try and trick me into giving the answers you want.” 
Alvez bit his tongue and looked away, trying to hide a small smile that appeared on his lips. 
Emily, on the other hand, hid her smile a bit better than him, but part of being previously engaged to a profiler meant you picked up on some of their tricks too. 
She nodded and pulled a file from across the table. “I’m assuming you know the basics since she, uh, is obsessed with Spencer.”
“Glad to see he still has that going for him.” You muttered and looked into the file. 
Emily shot Luke a look when he let out a huff or air, trying his damndest not to laugh. 
“What is the last thing you know about her?” 
You recounted the days leading up to the restaurant, and then the few days after, decidedly stopping short of the engagement breaking off a week later. 
They shared another look, and you didn’t enjoy whatever it was that had moved across their faces. 
“What? What happened?” 
“Y/n..”
“No Emily, I drove from DC to here, I deserve to know what happened. without some weird sugarcoating, alright?” 
Emily then begins to explain to you the past four years of Reid’s life. Cat pretending she was pregnant with his kid in prison, kidnapping his mother, framing him for murder in Mexico, going to prison—
“Spencer went to prison and none of you thought to call me….”
“We didn’t think you’d–” 
“I’m a fucking criminal defense attorney in DC Emily. Of course I’d want to know if he was arrested, especially internationally. I know that law better than all of you. If someone I knew was kidnapped, I’d call you immediately. Faster than the cops.” 
Both of them went silent. 
“So is he out?” 
They nodded slowly, silently. 
“How long was he in there.”
Nothing. 
“I asked. How. Long.”
Luke spoke up. “Three months.”��
“Jesus christ.” You stood up and started to pace around the room, taking the time you needed to calm down. 
Why didn’t Spencer call you—well you knew why Spencer wouldn’t call you. 
“Okay so he’s out.” You said finally. “Why am I here?” 
“Cat’s execution is coming up, and we….we found out that she’s convinced someone to kidnap some….people…close to Reid, and we knew you’d be on that list for him.” 
Your eyebrows went up at people but said nothing of it. Just as you went to say something else, JJ knocked on the door, another blonde woman behind her. 
They entered and JJ gave you a small, yet genuine smile. 
You returned it, but quickly shifted your gaze onto the woman behind. 
Your whole body shifted slightly, into a place of defense, locking your emotions down. You knew all the profilers were watching it happen in real time, which is why Emily walked over and stood next to you, a hand appearing on the small of your back as a comfort.
“Would someone like to tell me what is going on here?” The blonde woman spoke up, arms crossed.
At least Spencer’s taste in partners with attitude hadn’t changed. 
______________________________________________________________
“Victimology is off.”
“How so?” Prentiss looked up at him as he walked into the room. 
“Father and daughter. She’s never done that before.” 
Lewis spoke up. “She usually kills men that remind her of her father. Children–even adult children, are off limits. Do we have an ID yet.” 
Prentiss, Rossi, Garcia, and JJ all looked over at Reid, and he just pulled a hand down his face. “It’s. It’s Issac and Noelle Y/l/n.” 
“Y/l/n…as is Y/n Y/l/n.” Tara looked up surprised at Spencer. 
Reid nodded slowly, just staring at the picture on the projector.
While Luke spoke up. “Who is Y/n Y/l/n.” 
“An old friend.” Rossi quickly interjected, before any more explanation had to be said. It was clear both Alvez and Simmons, that whoever this was, was an extremely touchy subject for Reid. 
Tara, who had only known you for a little while, looked back at the picture. 
Rossie spoke up. “What do we know about the partner who’s helping her?” 
“It’s got to be someone from her prison.” Simmons spoke up. “She hasn’t had contact with anyone else.” 
______________________________________________________________
After all of that, you found yourself back in a place you left four years ago. It looked almost the same as when you had first moved in, but there was less of it. 
Almost as if he was having trouble covering places where things used to be.
There were almost no photos on the walls, since you had taken half of them, and were in the rest. 
Calling someone you once loved a stranger feels wrong. 
Max, as you had learned her name, was just sitting on the couch in your spot . She was looking around as you and Rossi stood by the kitchen counter. 
“Cat had a cellmate named Juliette Weaver. We believe the two were working together, as a way for Cat to get something against Spencer, and as payment, Cat would get Juliette’s ex.”
You nodded. “How does this affect me?” 
“She took your father and sister.” 
Your back straightened and immediately brought out your phone, to call your sister, but Rossi just grabbed your wrist (gently) and shook his head. “If she finds out you know, then it’s all over. She’s doing this on purpose. She knows about you and Reid, but she knows that dragging you into all of this will hurt him more than anything else.” 
His voice had gone low and quiet, so that the girl on the couch couldn’t hear. 
“So why is she here?” You whispered back. 
“Because we don’t want anyone in danger.” 
You closed your eyes and nodded. “I need a cup of tea.” 
Rossi let go of your wrist, and you walked into the kitchen, mostly eyes closed from the stress of the situation. 
The apartment was silent, the others watching as you grabbed a kettle, and started to make tea. It was like second nature to you as you turned the stovetop on, grabbed a mug from the cabinet (careful to not grab one of his favorites), and grabbed some tea from the cabinet. 
It didn’t dawn on you that you were drinking your favorite type of tea until the second sip, while the entire apartment was still silent. 
The pity from Rossi's look was palpable. 
“Don’t even start.” 
He shrugged and stayed silent. 
Until his walkie went off and he looked at Max. “It’s time. Let’s go.” 
Rossi looked back at you and gave you a quick hug, squeezing you tightly. “You’ve got this kid. Remember everything we talked about.” 
You nodded and gave them both a strained smile as they left the apartment, leaving you all alone in this place you once called home, alone. 
Never once, since you left, did you think you would ever be back here. You didn’t even realize you were drinking from one of your own mugs until it was just you. The irony of it was not lost on you, and you sat down in your spot on the couch. 
Well first you sat in Spencer’s seat but it felt too weird, so you shifted back into your spot on the couch. 
______________________________________________________________
“Juliette staked out in Reid’s life. Found out he was dating someone, but then must have discovered his ex-fiancée.” Simmons sighed. “He was probably so focused on Max, he didn’t even realize that someone was digging into his history, following them around.”
Prentiss nodded as they walked and talked. “But if Juliette was able to find Max, that meant she was easily able to find Y/n and her family. It means she must have access to all of her publicly available information. “
“Well at least we found their hidden agenda.” 
“No. We found Cat’s hidden agenda. Juliette doesn’t care about Reid. There’s something we’re missing here. Do a deep dive with Garcia.” 
Simmons nodded at Prentis. “On it.” 
“I’ll go to Reid's apartment and monitor onsite. Is there a trap and trace on his landline?” 
“Garcia’s almost set up.” Simmons walked away from Prentiss, and down towards Penelope’s office. 
“Well this went from bad to worse.” Tara walked up to Emily. 
Emily sighed in agreement. 
Lewis spoke up. “Female narcissists destroy their competition.Y/n  really shouldn’t be in there.” 
Emily just nodded and the two of them headed out of the bullpen. “Walk with me.” 
Tara kept stride with her as they pushed through the doors. Rossi was just getting off the phone with someone and turned to look at the two women approaching him and JJ. 
JJ spoke up when Rossi was finished. “So, the hospital just released the dad– Issac Y/l/n. He's on his way here now.
Rossi scoffed. “Question is, why let him go at all?”
“Matt's on that.” Emily gestures in the direction of Garcia’s office. “Juliette Weaver's real agenda should tell us where she's taking Y/n’s younger sister.”
Lewis spoke next. “I still think the play here is to get Cat and Juliette to contact each other, but I have no idea how.”
Prentiss crossed her arms. “I have a plan, but first we have to talk about Y/n.” 
______________________________________________________________
Just then, you heard the click of the door, and stood up, watching as the door swung open. 
And there he was. 
This was the first time you had seen Spencer in four years. 
And here he was, kissing Catherine Adams. 
The woman you could give partial credit to for ending your relationship. 
After a moment Spencer looked up, and took several steps away from Cat. His eyes were wide and locked on yours. 
It took a lot of self-restraint to not punch the lights out of Cat, and to stand still arms crossed. 
“Y/n?” Spencer’s voice broke a little bit. 
You never would say that Spencer was unattractive. In fact, it would be a lie if you ever said it. But something about the past four years aged him like a fine wine. 
His hair was a bit longer, he had some scruff—his baby face had melted away and standing in front of you was a man who thought you knew everything about, but was now a stranger. 
You didn’t answer him, watching as he took you in, standing in his apartment, for the first time since…
“What are you doing here?” 
You looked over at Cat, who had the most devious smirk on her face. 
Remember what Prentiss had said to you. 
“You know why I’m here.” 
Cat nodded and the two of them moved into the apartment, the door closing behind them. 
Spencer just stood ten feet away from you, eyes never leaving you, and you watched him right back. 
Cat, on the other hand, was walking around, examining the apartment. You could see her take notice of the tea you had made yourself on the counter. You could see the hatred from the corner of your eyes. The two of you were starting to piss her off. 
She spoke up, after a few moments of silence. “Did it make you mad that I was kissing your Fiancé?” 
You shook your head. “No.”
Your focus had fully turned to Cat, but you swore you swore you could hear Spencer take a sharp inhale as you spoke your next words.
“Well, he's not my fiancé and I kind of have some other things on my mind.”
Cat didn’t scare you, but there was just something so off-putting about her. “Like what?” 
“Are you gonna hurt Noelle?”
Cat shrugged. “Not if I don't have to, no. Honestly, if she follows instructions, she might even learn from this whole experience.”
You scoffed. “What does that mean?”
Cat just started fiddling with the chess set on the dresser. 
“Spencer, what does she mean?” You turned to look back at him, his name feeling so good on your tongue. 
Spencer, who really hadn’t stopped looking at you and sighed. “I think…She means that Noelle isn’t learning from her, but from Juliette.” 
You sat down in your spot on the couch, arms crossed. You were on the full defense. 
Spencer noticed where you sat and had to look down to conceal any notions of a smile on his face. 
Cat watched him before turning and looking at you, some more disdain on her face than before. 
“Normally, Spencie and I, we spend our time together playing games, but tonight, I've brought you all here to make a point. You are doing so much better.” 
Spencer spoke up. “With you?”
“I'm not talking to you.” Cat snapped at him before she turned to you. “I'm talking to you. Because, girlfriend, you need to know the truth about your fiancé.” 
“He's not my finacé.” You were unsure about how many more times you could say that outloud. 
“No kidding. When’s the last time you spoke? Right…” Cat walked over to the center of the room, right in front of the couch. “Here?” 
Your head whipped around to Spencer. “You told her about that?”
Spencer was pleading with his eyes. “I had to say a lot of things tonight.”
Cat’s voice caused your head to snap back to her. “Yes, he has. He said that you never compared to me, that, um... That no matter what, he will never get me out of his mind, unlike you. Unlike that girlfriend.” 
You tried not to wince at the mention of that girl Maxine out in one of the trucks.
Spencer sat down next to you. “Everything I said—I was lying to save your family.”
Cat scoffed. “Did our kiss look like a lie?” 
“No.” you just looked down at your hands. 
“Thank you. See, now we're getting to the heart of the matter.” Cat started mocking Spencer. “You see, everyone thinks that Dr. Spencer Reid is... Is just this nice, bookish, uh, genius who, uh, always saves the day and has all the answers. And has zero mommy issues, right? But, um... I know the real him.” 
“Oh, yeah? Who's the real me, Cat?” 
“The real Spencer Reid throws women against walls. And hisses that he's going to kill them.” 
Spencer stood up, squaring off against her.  “That was a very different situation.”
“No, it wasn't.” Cat was holding the smirk back this time, making your gut wretch. 
“Spencer…What is she talking about?” You looked from the psychopath in front of you, to the man you realized you might have never really known beside you.
“You tell her. She's not gonna believe it coming from me.” She huffed. 
Reid turned and looked at you. “Two years ago, Cat had her partner kidnap my mother. Just like tonight. She got under my skin and…”
Your chest hurts. “And you threw her against a wall?” 
Cat’s smirk was breaking through whatever resolve she had. “Don't skimp on the details, Spencie. She deserves to know everything.”
Every single time she said Spencie you swore a shock went up your spine. 
Spencer looked down at his hands, and then over at you. His voice had gotten quieter. “She was pregnant at the time and I knew that when I hurt her.” 
“And?” She stood there expectantly, waiting for Spencer to finish. When he didn’t, her face suddenly became solemn. “The next day... I miscarried. The end.”
Spencer looked at her. “That's not true.” 
“It is most certainly true. Check my medical records.” 
“That doesn't mean I-I would…”
Cat held up her hand to him. “Stop. Look.”
Spencer looked over at you, just sitting on the couch, trying to process everything that was going through your head. 
After thinking about everything you had gone through, especially with Spencer. “I thought you were better than that Spence.” 
It was the first time you had used a nickname for him in years. And he was hearing it for the first time while you were stuck in a standoff between himself and Cat Adams, your sister being god knows where. 
Spencer’s voice cracked. “I'm sorry.” 
Cat squatted down in front of you, a sick smile on her lips. She was enjoying this. She truly enjoyed watching his life crumble to bits. “Notice how your Spencie is apologizing to you and not me.”
You clenched your hands. “He’s not mine…”
Spencer just looked over at you. 
Cat nodded. “That's good. Because men are all the same. Aren't they, Jolie?” 
Spencer’s eyes lit up with an emotion you rarely saw from him when you were together. “Don't call her that.”
And you couldn’t blame him. The word ran you through like a spear and you were sure if you looked behind you, the blade would be through the couch. You tried so hard to not let either of the two people near you see how much it messed with you. Luckily for you, Cat was too busy pushing Spencer’s buttons to see the way her words won against you. 
Cat hissed at him. “What, are you gonna throw me against a wall and choke me, or do you only do that to pregnant women?” 
You finally spoke up. “Why are you doing this?”
“Because I want you to see it.” She gestured to Spencer. “I want you to see that he is...no better than he was before, or any man after. They’re all the same.” 
“Stop.”
Cat squatted down in front of you. “I can see it on your face. What's his name?” 
You stared back at her. “It's none of your business.”
That damned smirk of hers returned. “It is exactly my business. In fact, it's my specialty. I mean, I could have Juliette and baby sister go over there if you want. They could take care of him.” 
Reid looked over at you. “Say yes. Give her what she wants.” 
“Hmm. See, he wants you to get me to make a little phone call so they can trace it.” She moved away from you both and sat down in the lounging chair across from you. “They're so good, the FBI.”
You jumped up and started pacing, a spitting image of four years ago. “What is wrong with the two of you? What is this sick, twisted thing that you have? Listen, I just want to save my sister. Will you please just tell me what I have to do to do that?” 
“Tell me his name. Tell me the story. That's it. And then if they can let Juliette exit stage right, then I promise you I will let her go.”
You looked between Cat and Spencer before walking over to the kitchen, and hanging up the phone. After staring down at the decision you had just made, you walked back over and took your phone out. “Here.  Use this. Use my phone. They can't trace it.”
She just watched you. “You'd be surprised.”
“I don't even need a call. Just... just a photo.” You held the phone out to her. “Something to prove to me that she's still alive. Please”. 
Cat just looked up at your face. “Story first.”
“Y/n. Please.” Spencer turned to you, hoping you’d look back at him. “I have been here with her before. She called the number and told the partner to kill my mom.”
“It is so tricky, isn't it? I mean, who are you gonna trust? The lying, cheating, violent psychopath... Or me?”
You looked down at the ground, refusing to look over at Spencer. “His…His name was Mike Davis. We dated for two years. I met him a month after we…we split.”
Cat’s attention on you felt as if there were a million bees stinging your body all at different intervals, pain coursing through your body. “Good. When did it end?” 
“Last year.” 
“Was he good in bed?” 
Spencer stood up. “Shut up.” 
Cat was enjoying this. She was enjoying watching you make Spencer uncomfortable. She was enjoying hurting him in every masochistic way she could. “What? You have to know where you stand.”
“He was good…” You looked back at Cat. “Good at, um, separating me from my friends and my family. Enough that the first time he punched me in the face, I didn't have anywhere to go. And my first response wasn't "get out." It wasn't "go to hell." It was "I'm sorry, Mike." That's when he knew he had me.”
There was a glint in Spencer’s eyes, and you could swear they were tears, but you couldn’t tell from rage or sorrow. 
Cat continued to probe. “How many hospital visits were there?” 
You showed her a small scar on the inside of your elbow. “None. No, he... He knew how to hurt me just enough to hide it all, I guess.”  
“But you found the strength to leave. What did you do?” 
“ I planned and I... I waited.”
Cat’s eyes lit up. “Waited for what? “
“I live here in D.C.” You looked between Spencer and Cat. “but I'm also a resident in Virginia. It takes 60 days for the permit to clear.”
Spencer’s eyes widened. “Y/n, stop talking. Stop talking right now.”
Cat shushed him. “No, don't stop. Here. Give me the phone. Look, I'm gonna enter the text. Stick the landing and I'll hit "send."
You handed her the phone and she quickly typed out a message, her thumb hovering over send. 
Fiddling with your ring finger, you started to speak again. Slowly. Concisely. “When I was ready, I picked a fight. Loud enough for the neighbors to hear. And he came at me with his fist just cocked back, so I pulled my Glock 19 out of my purse. I shot him.”
Spencer tried to interject. “It was self-defense. He was attacking you—”
“That's what I told 911 as he was struggling to breathe on his kitchen floor. That's why the police never charged me. I’m a lawyer, I know how to plead.” You closed your eyes. “But I... after I hung up, I... I shot him two more times.” 
Cat was glowing, spinning around to face Spencer. “Wow, you really have a type, don't you? Quite a dilemma, too. She just admitted to murder.” 
Spencer was in disbelief. “She'll beat it.” . 
“Probably. But whatever feelings she might have still had for you, and whatever Maxine might have seen in you—-it’s all gone.” 
The phone in your hand buzzed.
“Oh, wow. Look at that. Your sister. Alive and well. You're welcome.” 
Your face hardened up, and you stood up straighter. Walking away from the two of them, you opened the door. “I got it.” 
She took the phone from your hand and you turned back to the two of them. There was no emotion behind your eyes as you looked back at Spencer. 
Cat smirked and looked up at Spencer. “I win.” 
______________________________________________________________
The prison transport was quiet, with the two guards sitting across from Spencer and Cat. It had been silent for about twenty minutes, but then, Cat spoke up. 
“Do you know why I did this? Why I really did this?” 
Spencer looked down at his hands. “You wanted to prove I'm a monster just like you.”
“No... Silly. I just wanted to see you again. I just wanted to make sure that you would never forget about me.” She sighed. “'Cause when they do put that needle in my arm, I just want there to be even the slightest chance that... Maybe you're still thinking about me…”
Spencer stiffened as she placed her head on his shoulder. “You didn't have to terrorize 3 innocent people. You could've just written a letter.” 
“Would you have written me back?” 
When Spencer didn’t respond, Cat knew her answer. 
“Bye, Spencie. I really enjoyed our date.” She smiled at him desperately, getting dragged out of the vehicle by the guards to the prison. 
______________________________________________________________
The elevator door opened and Spencer walked out of it, his whole body reeked of defeat, and he barely looked at Emily as she spoke.  “We need to debrief.” 
Spencer just walked right past her, and into the bullpen. His expression changed when he saw you on one side talking to Tara, and Max on the other, looking up at him right as he walked in. 
“Spencer, are you okay?” 
Her voice caught your ear, and immediately you looked up to see her walk over and embrace him in a hug. 
He smiled at her, and grateful returned the hug before muttering that he would be back, and explain everything.
You were never going to get back together with Spencer, but watching it in real time was like unlacing an old wound. 
Spencer walked over to you, and you stood up as he approached. 
“Uh, Tara, would you mind giving us…”
She nodded at him and walked away. 
Both of you went to speak, trying to say something to the other. 
“I should explain all of this.” 
Spencer shook his head. “You don’t have to explain any of that Y/n—it doesn’t.” 
You cut him off. “It was fake—most of it. I didn’t kill anyone, Spence. I was just lying to her to get her to send the text from my phone. It was all…It was made up.” 
He just nodded, staring at you really. 
You gave him a soft smile, and gently placed a hand on his shoulder. Both of you could feel the pulse between it, making you remove your hand and take a small step back. 
“Thank you for saving my sister and father.” 
Spencer watched your resolve fully formed, masking whatever you were feeling. He hated watching it happen to him, watching as you placed whatever feelings you had back into somewhere he couldn’t find. 
Garcia walked over and placed a hand on Spencer’s shoulder. “I just need you both to know, Cat Adams had a miscarriage, but it was months after whatever encounter you had. It’s not your fault. We looked at her records.” She was speaking low for you both, yet both of you let out a quiet sigh of relief. 
“They filled me in on everything that happened between both of you in the past couple years, and they asked me if I would be willing to…help them beat her.” 
Spencer looked up at you, and unlike yourself, every single emotion Spencer was feeling was racing across his face. 
He didn’t like that you knew about everything that had gone down. He was so happy you were okay. He was a little impressed by the way you beat Cat at her own game. He was upset that you put yourself in danger. 
“They gave me an ear piece and everything.” 
Spencer shook his head. “You’re not trained—that’s extremely dangerous of you.” 
You sighed and nodded. “Unfortunately Spencer, this is…this was the life I was used to when we were together. I knew the stakes. I mean the briefings I had with Hotch after you relapsed…” 
Spencer just clammed up and stood a bit straighter. “ I never knew..”
“It was like that on purpose. I didn’t want you to think that you were a burden or too much or—I was doing it for the potential of…” You cut yourself of, flinching at the parallels between this and your previous final conversation. 
You looked over at Garcia. “I need my bag Pen.” You whispered, taking a step away from Spencer. “I shouldn’t…I finished my job. My family is safe…” 
She had a rueful look on her face, but she nodded and took your arm, walking you back over to the desk where your stuff was. 
He looked up at Emily and walked over to her. “I’m…uh. I’m gonna go walk her out and then I’ll be right back.” 
Emily gave him the saddest smile, and just nodded. She knew that nothing she could say could make it any better. 
You grabbed your coat, and your bag, and the two of you walked to the elevator in silence, riding it all the way down to the parking garage, where your car was still there from this afternoon, all of those hours ago. 
You looked over at Spencer, tears in your eyes, having not said anything to him. 
As soon as he met your eyes, you dropped your bag, and Spencer wrapped his arms around you tightly, just holding you and resting his head on yours; trying to give you the comfort that he was rarely able to give you. 
Sobbing into his arms, you just tightly wrapped your arms around his torso and just held onto him tightly. Trying to decompress, trying to truly understand everything that had happened in the past twelve hours. 
It was Spencer who spoke first. 
“I’m so so sorry Y/n.” He whispered. “I never meant any of this to happen to you, and for you to get dragged back here and—” 
You shook your head slightly, but didn’t move from where you were. Neither of you did. 
“It’s what she wanted, Spence, and unfortunately for us, this was always bound to happen.” You whispered. 
The hug felt so good, but something about it was just so different. 
It’s not the way it used to be. 
“I need to go Spencer.” 
He nodded, and this time you moved away from him. His hand came up and wiped away one of the remaining tears on your cheek. 
You closed your eyes, and took a deep breath. 
“Oh fuck, why is this so fucking hard four years later.” You laughed, trying to regain any sort of composure. 
“Y/n…”
You took another step away from him and shook your head. 
“We can’t—I’m not.” You tried so hard to find the right words without bursting into tears again. “Spencer. I cannot put myself back to where I was four years ago. I can’t do it. And yes things have changed, but maybe that is for the better. Maybe you were always meant to be my maybe, and not my always.” 
You took another breath, but kept going. “You are amazing, and funny, and so smart Spence. But this…we ran our course. It didn’t work then, and I don’t know if I have it in me to try again just for it to fail.” 
“Y/n please.” 
“I will always love you but this…It’s time to…It’s time to stop. I have to go back to my life, and you go back upstairs to yours, with Prentiss and Rossi and Penelope and…Max.” 
Both of you winced as you said her name, but you took a step forward, moving to kiss him on the cheek. 
Spencer gently grabbed you face, giving you enough time to back out. 
You didn’t. 
His lips locked with yours, his thumb rubbing against your cheek as the two of you shared one more moment, just for the two of you. 
But it had to end. 
You couldn’t go back to the anxiety, the arguing, the petty disagreements. It wasn’t good for you. It was good for either of you. 
Stepping away again, you gently kissed his cheek, and started to slowly walk to your car. 
Right as you got to your car, you turned around and made eye contact with him one last time before the elevator doors closed, both of you with the most gut wrenching smile slightly plastered across your faces. 
You mouthed goodbye, unable to speak it out loud, and he nodded, tears filling his eyes as he whispered it back to you. 
The doors shut. 
You were all alone in this hollow parking garage. 
Your heart was aching, burning. 
But there was a sigh of relief, that came with the doors closing, and saying goodbye for the last, last time. 
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cozage · 1 year ago
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Congrats on 2k!!!!
For the request I was wondering if you could do the ASL boys confessing to their childhood friend that they've had a crush on:) and if it's not too much could you add shanks as well?? It's okay if not!
I love your writing it's the best just make sure you're taking care of yourself!! <3
A/N: Some of these are kind of subtle, but I think subtle is their way of confessing after that long :)  Characters: gn reader x Ace, Sabo, Luffy, Shanks CW: Marineford spoilers Total word count: 873
From Friends to Lovers
Ace
“She looks like your type,” you mumbled, nudging Ace. A girl at the end of the bar had been eyeing him all night. 
“And how do you know my type?” Ace asked, raising his eyebrow at you. He was slurring his words just slightly; enough for you to know he was drunk.
“Please. We’ve been friends forever, and we’ve sailed together for two years. I know what kind of girls you go for.” You laughed, pushing down the jealousy that churned in your stomach. 
“You must not,” Ace said, leaning his head against you. "I'll stay right where I am."
“Go talk to her,” you urged. “It’s not doing you any good being by my side.”
He frowned at you. “What do you mean? I’m already sitting next to the hottest person in the bar.”
You rolled your eyes and gave him a playful shove. 
“I’m serious.” He had a newfound urgency in his voice. “You’re the only one for me. You’ve always been the only one for me.”
Your heart skipped a beat. There was no way he could be serious right now. He was drunk and stupid. 
He saw the bewilderment on your face and gave you a goofy grin. “Are you just now realizing I’m head over heels for you?! I thought I had made that obvious from day one!”
Sabo
You stared at the man before you, unsure how to react. He looked like Sabo. He definitely acted like Sabo. Even his name was Sabo. But it had to be a coincidence. 
“No,” you said. “Sabo died. Sabo died a long time ago.”
“There was this one winter day where we went sledding,” he said. “We raced Ace and Luffy down the hill a hundred times. They kept trying to beat us, but they never could. And then Dadan made us go inside and gave us hot chocolate and let us all sleep together in one big bed that night because it was so cold. I said it was the best day ever because we got to spend it together.”
Tears filled your eyes as he spoke. “You died,” you whispered again. 
You were talking to a ghost. You were afraid any moment you’d wake up and be left alone again. Just like when he had died. Just like when Ace had died, and Luffy had disappeared.
“I lost my memories from the head injury and was taken in by the Revolutionary Army. I only remembered after I saw the headlines about…” 
“Ace,” you whispered, tears spilling over. It still hurt to think about. 
“I’ll never leave you again,” he promised. “Come back with me to the Revolutionary Army. We’ll keep you safe. I want to hear about everything.”
“Sabo-”
“Please,” he begged. “I know I just remembered you, but my heart has ached every moment we’ve been apart. I just found you again and I’m starting to feel whole. Please-please don’t leave yet.”
Luffy
“Heeeeeeyyyyyyy!!!!” Luffys voice rang out from above you, and you instinctually braced yourself. 
He slammed into you, sending the both of you falling to the ground. You screamed out in glee as rubber arms wrapped around you, holding you tight. 
“It’s been a while, Luffy!” 
“I can’t believe it’s really you!” He shouted. “What are you doing here?”
“This is my home, idiot!” You laughed, trying to squirm out from under him. 
Moving away from his grip was proving to be quite difficult though, considering Luffy’s body weight was on top of you, his arms still tightly around you to prevent you from moving. 
“Your home was Windmill Village. I’ve missed you since you left.” 
Tears filled your eyes, and you suddenly enjoyed his closeness “I missed you too, Luffy.”
“Sail with me and my crew,” he said, pulling away slightly to look in your eyes, begging you with his big, dark eyes. “I want you to join me.”
You raised your eyebrow. “I have a life here, Luffy. I can’t-“
“Make a life with me!” He whined. “Come on!!”
“You still want to be King of the Pirates?” 
“I can only do it with you by my side.”
Shanks
A red-haired man sat down next to you in the bar, glancing your way. 
“Come here often?” he asked, sliding your favorite beer over to you. 
“Only in town for the week.” A smile danced across your lips. “My pain in the ass captain has us on a tight schedule.”
Your heart skipped a beat at his jolly laugh, the room brightening as his voice echoed through it. 
“He sounds like tough work,” Shanks said, wiping a tear from his eye. 
“He is!” You took a long drink of your beer. “I’ve been sailing with him my whole life, I think I would know.”
He smirked. “And you’re not tired of him yet?”
“Nah,” you chuckled. “I could never get tired of you.”
Your words caught up with your brain, and your cheeks turned a deep pink at the realization of what you had said. 
“Good, because I’ll never get tired of you either. ” Shanks gave you a softy, gentle smile and cupped your cheek with his hand. “So you’re stuck with me for the rest of time, okay? You’re all mine.”
“Of course, Captain.”
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basil-fronsac · 2 months ago
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WILD GEESE ♧ social media a.u.
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─ · · 01. NEW BEGINNINGS
pairing: spencer agnew x reader
summary: having cleared the hurdles of your first day at smosh, things seem to be going smoothly. that is, until a few late night conversations cause a shift in your perspective.
tags: feminine pronouns / seemingly unrequited relationships / mentions of drinking / reader is an up-and-coming lifestyle + comedy youtuber
NAVIGATION | PROLOGUE | PART TWO (coming soon)
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💐 yourusername
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liked by spennser, filmingamanda, and others
yourusername big long day 🧺
i can safely say the first day jitters have subsided! additionally, i know this probably isn’t the ideal place, but i just wanted to take this space to express how truly grateful i am for smosh and for this opportunity. as many of you know, i desperately needed to get out of new york, and lost in a new city. these past few months have been a rollercoaster, but i feel as if i’ve finally arrived at the end. ian and anthony, thank you so so much for taking me on and allowing me to join your wonderful troup of extremely talented individuals, both on and off screen. whatever my future holds, i know working here will change me irrevocably—i’m so stoked.
view all 422 comments...
ianhecox i hope the welcome party wasn't too shabby... (liked by yourusername)
username06 smoshmouth appearance???
↳ username07 omg smosh pleasepleasepleaseplease
↳ username08 (name) and amanda in the same room 🤞
mal_myerz day was stressful but nevertheless she slayed
↳ yourusername a joint slay i fear
anthonypadilla so glad to have you here! (liked by yourusername)
username09 the scream i scrumpt
↳ username10 still can't believe she booked!!
↳ username09 or that she actually left winthrop in nyc
username10 WE HAVE CONFIRMATION
smoshgames 🔥
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( 💬 ) MESSAGES | now
unknown sender
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( 💬 ) MESSAGES | 12m ago
sweetheart lovey-dovey wifey 💗🍒
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( 💬 ) MESSAGES | 36m ago
unknown sender
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(🔔) yourusername, see what's happening on twitter!
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a/n: surprised myself with how quickly i got this out!! please let me know what you thought of this chapter, and thank you so much for reading xx
would you guys like to see more longform writing in future chapters? lmk
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bunnliix · 4 months ago
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Little Doe
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All I can say is that I went a lil wild writing this, and that this may have been sitting around in my google drive for months now. So here is what happens when I get inspired and maybe a bit unhinged
Pairing: Outlaw!Mingi x fem!reader  Summary: You catch Mingi's eye, and he doesn't want to let you go wc: 1.4k AU: bouncy universe Genre: SMUT warnings: fem!reader, mean!Mingi, stalking, gunplay, being grabbed and held down, being stepped on, yandere-ish Mingi Smut warnings: DUB-CON/non-con?, threats, guns, praise kink if you squint, pet names (doe, love), breeding kink, breath play, talks of branding, talks of primal play, being pulled up by your hair, pain, non-con voyeurism Beta'd by the wonderful @skzdust
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The heel of his boot pushes down into your back as you struggle underneath him. “Awww, look at this. You really think you’re gonna escape darlin'?” The boot wedges itself further into your back, as you feel a gun push into the back of your head. “I caught you, little doe, and now I’m gonna have fun with you, and if you try and run, well, let's say it won’t be fun for you.” You hear him say to you, as the gun pushes further into the back of your skull.
You stayed silent, not wanting to get yourself killed, but also not wanting to endure whatever this man would do to you.
“Cat got your tongue, little doe? C’mon, talk to me love. I wanna hear how pretty your voice sounds before I make you scream. Before you have no voice because I’ve made you scream so much that you’ve lost it,” he says, leaning down close to you, as you lay on the ground.
Flashback…
You had left the bar late one night, having had your weekly celebration with your friends. They had all left before you, leaving you in the bar filled with men, one of whom caught your eye, and not in the best way. He was staring you down like a tiger would its prey, you felt like if you stayed any longer, you’d be trapped. So you made your escape, or what you thought was your escape. 
Walking out of the bar, you walk down the main road till you reach an alleyway that provides you a shortcut on your way home. You slip into the narrow path between buildings, thinking that you’d be safe now, not having seen or heard anyone follow you out of the bar. You get about halfway down the alley when you hear steps behind you, which pushes you to hurry to the other end of the alleyway. You don’t stop to look behind you, knowing it would only slow you down, and you never know if this person is alone or if there’s somebody waiting for you to look away before they swoop in and catch you within their claws.
You make it almost all the way to the end of the alleyway when your hands are grabbed and pulled behind you. You thrash around in the stranger’s grip, catching him off guard for a moment, allowing you to escape. You make it only a couple feet further before you’re forcibly pushed to the ground, a boot in your back as you struggle to get out from underneath it.
Back to the present…
“Now, are we going to do it the easy way, or the hard way, doe?” He asks you, his voice almost sickly sweet.
You struggled underneath him, trying to free yourself. His shoe only pressing down harder, making your attempts at freedom useless.
“I guess we’re doing it the hard way then,” You heard as you felt him move, as well as a hand snaking up your thigh, finding your panties and ripping them off your body.
“Well, I should thank you for wearing a skirt, making it so much easier for me.” He thanked you, as you felt his fingers on you, finding that you were soaked.
“Oh? It seems I’ve found a dirty little doe. Look at you, getting soaked over a stranger pinning you down and using you. Maybe I’ll just have to keep you after this. Use you for my own pleasure whenever I want, I’m sure you wouldn’t say no, would you, my pretty fucking cocksleeve?” You heard from above you as your hair was gripped, pulling your head up, as fingers appeared in front of your face.
“Suck. If you don’t, then I guess you want some pain, hmm?” You quickly take his fingers into your mouth, sucking on them diligently as he hums happily, or at least you assumed it was happily.
You felt his boot leave your back, as he rearranged himself above you, and you heard clothing being moved, as well as a zipped being unzipped and you knew what he was doing. You felt your skirt being flipped up and a groan as he laid his eyes on your pussy.
“Oh baby, little doe, I’m gonna stretch you out so much, no one else will compare by the time I’m done with you. You’ll want my cock to fuck you over and over again, nothing else will satisfy you.” He told you, as he pulled your hips upwards until you were on your knees.
A hand found its way onto your back, pressing down to keep you in position as you felt the head of his cock at your entrance as it pushed in. The stretch was more than you had ever felt before, but fuck it felt amazing and you knew, as he slid into you, that you’d never find another man to satisfy you ever again.
The man above you groaned, “Fuck little doe, you’re so fucking tight and you squeeze me just right. I’m just gonna have to keep you. I’ll keep you and you can sit on my cock all pretty, and I’ll fuck a baby into you too someday.” He rambled on and on as he slid back out before slamming back into you, his hips snapping into yours.
“Fuck, a pretty little cocksleeve, just for me. Maybe I’ll have to recreate this night over and over again, just to keep the memory fresh. Let you run and get all scared as I chase you. Maybe next time, I’ll trace pretty designs into your precious fucking skin, leave my own mark on you. Maybe I’ll even brand you.” You moaned at the thought of it. “Oh? Someone wants my mark on you permanently? Cute little doe. I’ll brand you, and mark your pretty skin with whatever designs I choose.”
Skin slapping skin was the only sound other than both of your moans and groans that could be heard, as you felt any sanity leave your body. You only wanted this man to fuck you for the rest of your life. He could use you for his pleasure, you didn’t care as long as it meant you getting fucked by him. Maybe he’d be nice enough to fulfill all of your dirty fucking fantasies. God, you’d beg on your knees if it meant he’d use you. 
You could feel your orgasm approaching quickly as he kept fucking you hard, your pussy squeezing him. He groaned and you felt his hand move from your back to your throat, gripping it tightly and pulling you up against him, your back to his chest. “Fuck baby, keep squeezing me like that and I’ll come. You want my come inside of your little pussy so badly?” He asked you, as you whined.
Your release hit you, washing over you like a wave without any warning. You moaned before whining as he continued fucking you through your orgasm. “Good girl, cumming on my cock. Fuck baby, I’m gonna come.” He groaned, as you felt his come inside of you as he came, holding you down onto his cock as far as you could go. You were so sensitive you whined in protest as he thrust a couple more times to make sure you had taken all of his cum inside your pussy. You slumped in his arms, unable to keep yourself up anymore, only held up by his grip on your throat.
“Aww, can’t hold yourself up anymore, my doe? Cute.” He told you, as he pulled you off of his dick, his come dripping out of you.
“Quite a performance there, Mingi,” you heard another man say, as the man, who you now knew was named Mingi, chuckled from above.
“Always the voyeur, aren’t you, Hongjoong?” Mingi answered the other man.
“Is it wrong to enjoy seeing you fuck yet another girl stupid?”
“No, but it does make you a bit of a creep, if you weren’t so attractive physically.” After replying to Hongjoong, Mingi hoisted your body onto his shoulder as he stood up.
“Come on lil doe, I’m taking you with me. Nobody’ll miss you, right?” He asked you, getting a whine in return, making him chuckle.
“Cute. And if anyone does miss you, then you’ll just have to tell them how much you don’t want to leave me. Because I know you won’t ever want to. No one ever does.”
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Taglist: @callmeghostly @bethelighthalazia @palindrome969
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themoonlitquill · 9 days ago
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Whispers Woven in Shadow. (1/?)
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𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙖 𝙛𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙩𝙝 𝘼𝙧𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙤𝙣 𝙨𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧? 𝙃𝙤𝙬 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙨𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙣𝙖𝙧𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙚? 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙙𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙨𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚? 𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙞𝙨 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙮.
𝗣𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 ; 𝖠𝗓𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗅 𝗑 𝖥𝖾𝗆!𝖮𝖢 (𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗎𝖺𝗅).
𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞 ; I’m terrible at summaries, so please don’t hate me for that! This is an OC that I’ve been playing around with for literal ages and I finally made the choice to really dive in and develop her, and then the ideas just started flowing in and I couldn’t stop writing! I’m already working on a second chapter for this, but let me know your thoughts if you’d like to see this continued! I don’t post my writing too often, so be kind if you don’t mind!! Oh, && special thanks to @coffeebooksrain18 for the moodboard! 🩵 Enjoy!
𝖳𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗀𝖾𝗋 𝖶𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌 ; 𝗠𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗶𝘀𝗼𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻, 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗻, 𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝗼𝗳 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘀𝘁𝘆 𝗶𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗿-𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗺𝗼𝗶𝗹.
𝖶𝗈𝗋𝖽 𝖢𝗈𝗎𝗇𝗍 ; 3802.
Everything is different now, Ariadne Archeron blinks as she looks out the window to the clear skies of robin’s egg blue with rays of sunlight streaming through to cast a golden hue that emitted warmth and yet, she had never felt so cold, so empty. Her mind was spinning around in circles, jumping from thought to thought, never settling and making her skin itch with such an intensity that she had to refrain herself from digging her nails in and ripping flesh from bone.
It was all wrong. Every single bit of it. And she couldn’t understand what was going on and why she was feeling this way.
The simple answer was because she had been thrown into a massive pot that stripped her humanity from her without consent and replaced it with immortality, which was something she had only wondered about in the stories that Elain used to show her as a little girl; she never imagined that it would come true and become her life.
Feyre had accepted being Made into High Fae graciously, almost eagerly, while Nesta seethed and resented, focusing her pent up emotions into care and concern for Elain. That left Ariadne to deal with it alone and if she were to be honest with herself, she wasn’t doing a very good job of it.
She was broken, lost, and confused, nearly a shell of her former self. How was she to handle this? What was she to do? There wasn’t a set of rules for something like this and there was no one to turn to for advice, not that she could anyway with her inability to speak.
It seemed that magic couldn’t heal everything.
Ariadne had been born deaf and could only communicate through gestures and looks, which made everything that much harder for her compared to her sisters. She couldn’t get her mouth to form the words that ran rampant in her head, not that she didn’t try, and eventually, she gave up, coming to the realization that what she so desperately wanted to say would never be heard by anyone other than herself.
She had never felt sorry about her ailment before, knowing that Nesta understood when she was irritated by the way her eyes narrowed with a hand placed defiantly on her hip and that Elain knew when she needed a moment away from their father when a frustrated huff emitted from her nose, followed with the incessant picking at the skin around her fingernails.
And Feyre, well, she was able to decipher what Ariadne wanted before she even did.
But it was different now. It wasn’t the same and the changes she was going through had to be dealt with, with no help from anyone. It wasn’t fair.
She wanted to scream and yell and cry and throw things, but she couldn’t, and if she could, she wouldn’t want to. That wasn’t who she was and it definitely wasn’t how she acted when life didn’t go the way she wished for it to. Instead, Ariadne kept it hidden away from prying eyes and suffered in silence, because that’s what this all was.
Suffering.
Agony.
Without any end in sight.
Ariadne works to swallow the dry lump that had formed in her throat and she withholds a wince, knowing that she needed something to drink and she was already dreading the fact that she’d have to leave the bit of safety in the room, that was now hers, to go get it.
Unless she wanted to stick her mouth under the faucet again and she most definitely did not.
Downstairs it is, she gnaws on the inside of her lower lip until she tastes the unmistakable tang of copper on her tongue, the nerves already setting in. You can do this, Ari. Just stand up and walk. It isn’t that hard, her fingers clenched into a fist, nails biting into her palm. Get UP! Get up, get up, get up!
Why couldn’t she move? What was wrong with her?
Ariadne sucks in a breath and holds it for a moment, then releases, her eyelids fluttering as she struggles to keep herself composed. The tears were right there and there was no way she would allow them to fall; she had to be strong like Feyre would be, not letting anything knock her down, and if it did, she’d get back up to try again. She could do that, couldn’t she?
It’ll be quick. Start with putting your feet on the floor. That’s easy enough to do, she reopens her eyes and stares straight ahead for several minutes, working on keeping each breath steady. On the count of three… One, her skin prickles, but she manages to sit up straight, legs unfolding. Two, sweat forms on her brow as she moves her feet to hover over the carpet. Three!
The distance closes and she freezes when she feels the plush material against her skin, finding that it was kind of… nice. See, not so bad, right? One thing at a time. You can do that no problem.
A small bit of confidence surges through her and she quickly rests her arms on either side of the chair, bracing herself before pushing herself up; her knees wobble and her brow furrows, but Ariadne - more determined than she realized - finds her balance and straightens, taking a deep breath in order to calm down a little.
Hey! Look at that. You did it, there’s a twitch at the corner of her mouth, which she dutifully ignores. Now, another deep breath. Start walking, was it too soon to do this? It had only been a week since- Don’t go there, Ari. You’re doing so well. You aren’t there anymore. You’re fine, she lifts her chin and turns towards the door. Go on, she takes a step.
Ariadne keeps going, one foot at a time, and becomes more steady, making her way across the - her - room to the door and stopping to stand in front of it. Her hand wrapped around the handle, halfway turned, but she froze again. Completely immobile. Why was her heart beating so quickly? This wasn’t normal. It made no sense to feel like this and she couldn’t find a way to understand it, which was incredibly frustrating.
It’s good that you want to see something else besides these same four walls. Nothing wrong with that. No one is even going to be out there, she turns it the rest of the way. Nesta is with Elain, and Feyre, her heart clenches painfully. Feyre isn’t here right now, so you’re going to have to do this yourself, she pulls and it opens. There you go.
Ariadne peers out into the hall and looks down both ends, not seeing anything other than the rest of the doors, all closed, and the sconces that emitted a warm light. She slips through and begins to walk, her feet padding softly against the floor and she was hoping that the kitchen was in this direction or else she was going to be wandering around for a while; the House of Wind was huge.
She continues on with her hands clasped together in front of her, the pad of her thumb rubbing soothing circles onto the top and she can’t help but look around, never having seen anything like it before. Not even Archeron Estate. The amount of money that Rhysand had to build something like this? He must’ve grown up rich. Her gaze roams over the intricate carvings on the large columned archways, head tilted in quiet admiration. They were pretty.
The hallway comes to a set of stairs, only four, and Ariadne pauses before taking each one down to find a kitchen to the left that led to what she assumed was the dining room, and held a grand table in the center with multiple high-backed chairs.
Yeah, definitely rich from birth, she walks further in and flicks her eyes over the cabinets, realizing that she had no clue where anything was. Look through all of them. It isn’t going to matter anyway, she reaches up on her tip-toes and her fingertips barely brush against the handle. Oh, great, she sighs. Where’s a ladder when you need one?
She notes the sink only a few inches away and she moves to crouch down in front, beginning to search through and eventually coming up empty. Please don’t tell me I have to climb on a counter, Ariadne stands back up straight. Again, there was really no other way, was there? Of course not.
Her brow furrows as she surveys the correct way to do it without getting hurt, knowing that no one was there to help if things went awry; she finally settles on using the shelf that went across the middle of the bottom cabinet to use to give her a boost and then she’d be able to get her leg up by bracing her weight against the wall.
It seemed simple enough.
After getting into position, Ariadne takes a breath and places her hand to the left as she pushes her foot against the shelf. She grunts from the effort to lift her leg, managing to get her knee onto the counter and use what strength she had to pull the rest of herself on top.
She grasps at the handle on the cabinet to steady herself before she adjusts her knees and leans over a little to open it, only to find plates. An annoyed huff makes her nostrils flare and she carefully shuts it. I should’ve just drank from the faucet again, her arm extends and her fingers wrap around the next handle as she moves over. This is way too much to do for a cup, she keeps her spine straight and prays to whatever higher power hailed over Prythian that this was the right one.
Ariadne pulls, and she doesn’t notice the fabric of her dress shift or when she starts to slide; she peeks inside and her eyes brighten when she sees what she had been hoping for. Yes!
Her body goes to lean like she had done a couple minutes ago and her knees give out from under her, a surprised sound leaving her lips as her other arm flails, unable to find anything to hold onto. No!
Everything went sideways and Ariadne began to fall, the top of her foot hitting the edge of the counter and she hisses through her teeth, eyes squeezing shut and bracing for the impact of her body against the tiled floor. But it never came. There was something looped around her waist, cool and soft, flowing like silk and holding with a gentleness that she had never felt before. What is it? Where did it come from?
Whatever it was had decided to turn her upright and place her down safely, which is when she decided to open her eyes; the first thing noticed were the wings, massive and actually really beautiful, but holding a power that matched that of the one, two, three, four… seven siphons, which reminded her of sapphires, and then it was the deep bronze skin that was littered with dirt, grime, and only the Gods knew what else, followed by a tousle of dark hair, slightly curly.
Though, what Ariadne noticed the most was the golden glow that faded into hazel. There was a mixture of guardedness, curiosity, and worry - maybe? - swirling within the shifting shades of green and brown, but she wasn’t sure if she could trust it. Azriel, I think. The other one is who Nesta can’t stand. Cassian? This is the… Spysinger, her lips pressed together. No, that isn’t right. Oh! Shadowmaster. Yeah, that makes more sense.
She blinks and realizes that she had been staring at him for longer than she should’ve and quickly refocuses to see that he had come around from the other side of the counter to stand a few feet away from her.
It looked like the Shadowmaster had been in a few fights and then slept on the ground afterwards, which was weird to her because she swore Cassian was the aggressive one. Never judge a book, Ari. People look at you and think you’re not capable of anything or that you’re stupid, she lifts her chin and finds that she could now only see his chest when she did that, so she tilts her head back further until she finds his face again.
₊˚✧𑁍.ೃ࿔*:・
Azriel watches in silence as the youngest Archeron sister - Ariadne - nearly breaks her neck in order to meet his gaze, the warm honey of her eyes full of questions, trepidation, and a sadness that was trying to hide itself and he was certain it was much larger than what he already caught. He found himself wishing he could ask her about it, but that was impossible for two important reasons; one, Azriel didn’t do things like that and two, even if he did, Ariadne wouldn’t be able to hear him.
And who was to say that if she could, she would answer?
He resorts to raising a single brow, inclining his head towards the counter as he keeps his sights set on her, surveying her expression for the slightest change; it starts with a flicker of surprise before shifting to neutral and she nods, the smallest of sighs emitting from her parted lips and she glances at the still open cabinet that held the cups, then tapping her fingers at the base of her throat.
Ah, he steps forward and reaches inside to grab one, lowering it down and handing it to her. There’s a moment of hesitation, though it doesn’t seem to be an aversion to him. It was more so of someone unsure how to accept help when they had been doing everything without it for a long time. You’d know all about that, wouldn’t you?
The ever-present shadows that swirled around Azriel became tense at the thought and he quickly pushed it to the back of his mind to be locked away.
Now wasn’t the time.
Ariadne was staring at the glass and he realized that she had no idea that the House of Wind would provide anything she wanted. After all, how was she going to know anything about a world she had been thrown into? Stories that passed over to the human lands weren’t always accurate.
Will you- He hears a quiet gasp and he cuts himself off, attention snapping back to the small Fae in front of him that was watching as… orange juice filled to the brim. Apparently, she figured it out a lot quicker than he thought she would. The corner of his mouth twitches. Smart girl.
Azriel takes a couple steps back and leans his hip against the counter, arms crossed over his chest with his wings tucked behind. Ariadne turns her head and blinks at him, observing his position before giving a single dip of her chin and he had a feeling that it was her way of saying ‘thank you.’
He returns the gesture and she begins to walk by, more than likely heading back to her room, and that’s when he smells it; cherry blossoms. It was sweet and soft, hints of creamy vanilla bean and almond with a warmth that made him want to reach out and touch her.
It’s his turn to blink now and he waits for Ariadne to pass before he looks over his shoulder, hazel returning to that golden hue as she makes her way back up the steps and disappears down the hall. His shadows begin curling around his neck and ears, whispering to him in cool breaths, some louder than others.
She is special. Yes, special. And alone. Afraid. She is lost. No way to understand. She cannot ask. She wants to understand. Must help her understand. Yes. Help her.
Azriel gives a small tug and they fall silent, though they flick against his skin in protest and to show their evident distaste for his dismissal. He rolls his eyes with a heavy exhale, giving his head a shake before he pushes himself away from the counter and disappears into the same temperamental darkness that matched that of himself.
₊˚✧𑁍.ೃ࿔*:・
Ariadne was unsure how to feel about her brief interaction with Azriel; he understood what she’d been trying to do and had even helped her, which was odd for her, but it made him better than most people she had met. He didn’t invade her personal space either, didn’t try to do anything at all that would make her the slightest bit uncomfortable.
In fact, he seemed to be a fairly decent male. She couldn’t remember a single instance over the few times she had been around him - even as a human - where he had ever acted out or caused any sort of problem. And if he did, she had an inkling that it would have to be over something important.
Her eyes lifted to the window and found that the sun had set, painting the sky in magenta and lavender with bursts of burnt orange and yellow; it reminded her of something that Feyre might like to recreate on canvas. There’s a sharp pang in the center of her heart at the thought of her sister and she winces, reaching up to rub the spot with her hand.
It was hard without Feyre. Yes, Nesta and Elain were there, but they were handling being Made even worse than Ariadne was. At least she had left the room. Granted, it was only once and she wasn’t gone for that long. It was still more than what they were doing.
And that had to count for something, didn’t it?
Ariadne had been the closest with Feyre, in age and in every other way. They were inseparable and a lot of love was shared between the two of them, along with a deep-rooted loyalty and respect for who they each were. And now? She felt like she was missing a vital piece of herself that she didn’t know how to get back and the longer the stretch of days went on, the more painful it got.
She picks at the skin around her nails and shifts her gaze to the floor, not wanting to think about any of this anymore. That was the thing about having no way to talk to someone; she tended to inner-monologue and go too into detail about things, overwhelming herself until she disassociated from it all.
Not the best solution, but it worked for her.
A flicker of movement in the corner catches her attention and she zeroes in on it, eyes narrowing slightly. Don’t tell me this place has ghosts now, Ariadne stands, noting how it was darker than it should’ve been with the way the light was streaming in. Because I will find a way to get out of here. There can’t be that many stairs.
She takes a couple steps forward, head tilted with curiosity and a bit of fear if it was actually a ghost. Whatever you are, I’m not going to hurt you, so that means you can’t hurt me either. That’s how this works.
The unknown something moves again, causing a shift in the air that her new Fae eyes are able to detect; it looked like smoke, though more refined and smooth, shimmering with an iridescence that reminded her of the stars. She reaches out. What are you?
It slithers forward and Ariadne watches as it brushes against one of her fingers, almost as if it were curious about her too, and that’s when she feels that same softness that had been around her waist earlier, silken and surprisingly strong.
You’re one of Azriel’s shadows, it curls around her finger and Ariadne hums. What are you doing here? Did he send you?
The shadow moves further up until it’s wrapped around her wrist, the end curled between her fingers and she feels something push at the back of her skull. It didn’t hurt, but it was strange; it sort of felt like someone was trying to fit the wrong key into a lock.
Ariadne keeps her eye on the shadow and takes a breath. Are you trying to get in? Feyre mentioned that before, but I can’t remember what it’s called. It’s mind reading though, isn’t it? Are you saying I can do it too?
There’s an instantaneous pressure around her wrist and she sucks in another breath. Okay, that’s… Okay, her brow furrows; how did the shadow know before she did? Was it because of Azriel being their master? But then that would mean he would know too, wouldn’t he? And he had never given any inclination that he did, so how?
She wished she knew all of the information that Feyre had given back when she first showed them that she was High Fae. Ariadne could read, some, from the few books Nesta was able to get when they lived in the small cottage and then even more so when their father had suddenly been offered a business deal that made them wealthy again, not that she remembered any of that part of their life, and was given lessons; she didn’t like them and proceeded to have a glare off with her eldest sister until it was made clear that there would be no changing her mind.
Ariadne would teach herself.
And reading turned into writing.
But it had been slow going at first and when Feyre had arrived with Rhysand, Azriel, and Cassian, she had only gotten so far and there was some of it that had been written down that she either got mixed up or couldn’t remember at all. It was all bits and pieces.
The tightening around her wrist draws her attention back to the present and she shakes her head. Right. Focus, Ari. If the shadow is trying to tell me what I think it is, I have to try, don’t I?
Ariadne closes her eyes and recedes back into her mind, maneuvering through the jumbled mess of thoughts before she comes across an opalescent wall, shimmering with a moonlight glow and she couldn’t help but think how pretty it was. Why had she never noticed this before? Her head tilts and she probes further, searching for some way to open it.
It brushed softly against her just as the shadow did and she gave an instinctive squeeze in return before the wall of light brightened, beginning to shake and shift, soon revealing a small entryway for a single person to get through. She gasps.
Whoa! How did I do that? Ariadne opens her eyes and looks down to see the little thing was weaving between her fingers. Can you hear me now?
Yes.
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admirationandromantics · 2 months ago
Text
Stress-reliever
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Okay, so another request! I really like this one, and I had a lot of fun writing it too. Sorry it took so long, but I try to work at an acceptable pace. Anyways, this story is about reader having an assignment and being hella stressed because she can't understand anything. Josh, her friend, comes over because she doesn't answer any of his texts or calls and gets worried about how hard she's pushing herself. And he knows the best way for her to relax...
Word count: 3k (Unedited)
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I let out a silent scream, slamming my fist into the book. Goodness sake, why was this so difficult? I look at my word count, and it’s nowhere near finished. I don’t even have a good point I’m writing about. Everything I’ve written before this has been great, or at least good. This was the exception. I don’t understand the lectures, I don’t understand the book, I don’t understand anything. No shit my essay would be trash. 
My phone start plinging, but I ignore it. I have to get this. Maybe I’ll read the chapter one more time. I’ve lost count on how many times I’ve already read it, but I don’t have anything better going for me. I tried youtube videos, getting someone to explain it to me, reading, writing, everything. This was stressing me out, and the deadline is in one week. I don’t have good sources, or backups. I can’t change the theme. 
The phone rings again, but this time, I put it on silent. I have to get this, I need to understand it. Maybe I need a breather? But I don’t have time. I stand up and walk to the window. I can at least get some fresh air inside, I deserve that. I click the lock, pulling the window open. The fresh winter breeze flows into my room, shuffling my papers and pulling my hair. The outside arena has been filled with water, making a large skating rink. A bunch of people are skating, some with families, some while holding hands. They’re probably all finished with tests, exams and deadlines. I take a deep breath, filling my lungs with the ice cold air. A shiver runs through me, and I take it as a sign to sit down again. This essay isn’t going to write itself. I correct my papers and open the book in the right chapter again. Just keep reading, just keep reading. I’ll get there eventually. 
***
A loud knock is heard on my door, pulling me out of my trance. I’ve written how much? 4 sentences? At this pace, I’ll have to pull all-nighters all week. Someone knocks on the door again, and I check the time. It’s late, not too late, but who would be here at this time? I get up from the desk, walking to the door and unlocking it. Outside in the hall, Josh is standing with his stupidly cute smile and a plastic bag. 
“Josh” I sigh weakly, hugging him while putting all my weight on him. I’m so tired, so stressed and sick of my studies. 
“You look horrible” he whispers back, hands going around me to stop me from falling on the floor. 
“Thank you, I appreciate it” 
“Have you been outside today?” 
I look up at him, giving a guilty smile. He sees right through me and rolls his eyes. I let go, opening the door wider to let him in. 
“Brough you take-out, figured you were too obsessed with whatever you’re doing that you haven’t eaten”
“You’re an angel” 
“I know” he smiles, putting the bag down and pulling off his jacket. He goes to sit in my desk chair, glancing over all my notes. 
“Hard stuff” he grabs a paper, reading quickly over the highlighted lines. I turn to the food, taking out the different boxes. Chinese food, how sweet of him. 
“I’ve never been this stressed in my entire life” I complain, my neck sore and eyes tired. I grab a roll, eating it quickly. I’m apparently very hungry too. 
“You know, I actually wrote about how stress affects-” 
“Stop!” 
“What?”
“I don’t want to hear about how it’ll kill me, you psychology majors are insane with your theories” 
“It’s not a theory”
“Do you really think knowing this will help me or stress me out more”
“Yeah, you’re right” 
I take another roll, sitting down on the bed and eating it. 
“You know, you could do something more stress-relieving…”
He’s smiling, but I don’t know why. I don’t have time to do anything else right now. But, if it worked, I’d probably understand and write much faster. The offer is tempting. 
“Like what?”
“Well, according to your stress-patterns you-”
“Don’t psycho-analyze me” I threaten, pointing a finger at him, my hand now empty again. He puts his hands up, smirking. That stupid smirk. 
“Fine, okay. Let’s think of normal things then… taking a hot bath”
“I showered this morning” 
“It’s not to get clean, it’s to relax” 
“No, next” 
He shrugs, shaking his head in disbelief. I know I’m difficult, but he’s still here, so I haven’t cracked him yet. 
“Go for a walk?”
I laugh at him. No way I’m going somewhere, and when inspiration strikes I’m not there to take advantage of it. It might hit when I’m 20 minutes from home, and when I get back, it’ll be dead. 
“How about I put it this way Josh… I’m NOT leaving my room” 
He thinks hard, trying to come up with something. I subtle darkness coats his eyes as he looks up at me again, and I smile, intrigued by what he’s come up with. 
“I can only think of one more thing” 
“And that is?” 
He opens his mouth, but stops himself and snickers. I’m left in the dark. 
“Nah, you probably wouldn’t want to” 
I look around confused, throwing my hands out. I’m literally open to anything as long as I can relax a bit. 
“Oh, please tell me, I’m desperate” I whine jokingly, making him laugh. 
“Oh really? How desperate?” 
“Incredibly desperate, I’ll do anything” 
“Anything?” he asks, and I can already sense that I’ll regret saying it. He leans forward, loving that he knows about this secret thing which I don’t. God, he’s a prick. 
“Yes, now tell me” I urge, my curiosity overwhelming. 
“Fine, okay” he leans back on the chair, looking me up and down. “I mean, I could help you relax a bit” 
“With what?” 
“Jesus Christ” 
“Will you just tell me Josh?” 
He stands up, making his way over and cornering me with his arms. Oh. Ooooh… I heat up just from the thought, getting wetter by the second as I think about all the erotic possibilities of this encounter. 
That’s what he meant. I almost feel stupid for not getting it at first. But I have to remember that we’re friends, and this is a very intimate act. Would I really want to jeopardise our friendship for an essay? I already feel my body betraying me, heart racing quicker than my thoughts. 
My body gets the better of me, and I lean into him, capturing his lips and throwing my arms around him. He doesn’t waste time, returning the favour and leaning over me, pushing me back on the bed. Hand goes to my thigh, lifting my leg up. He places himself in between them, staying over me with the help of his other hand. A tight squeeze over my knee makes me gasp, and he uses the opportunity to put his tongue in my mouth. He explores all of me, touching in all the right places, occasionally rubbing where he senses I feel weaker. I pour all my tension into him, another form of it building up in my stomach, begging to be satisfied. 
“Josh…” 
He doesn’t stop, mouth instead moving to my neck as he kisses and sucks. 
“Tell me if you want to stop” he whispers against my skin. I don’t want to stop. I’ve wanted this for a long time, and using my stress as an excuse? I don’t know what will happen after this, but I do know that I want to fuck him. For as long as possible. 
He hits my spot under my jaw, making a loud involuntary moan escape my lips. I feel him smirk against my skin before biting down. My hand immediately flies to my mouth. It would not be good for me if the other people in the nearby dorms heard me. 
“I want to hear you” He’s quick to take hold of my hand, trapping it over my head, pressing my whole body down on the mattress. God he’s hot, I’ve never seen this side of him. I always thought he was ‘just talk no action’, but apparently I was wrong. 
“Fuck” I whimper, feeling messy and needy for him. He knew what he was doing, and it was working a little too well. 
“All my calls, all my texts, everything left unanswered…” 
“I was studying” I breathe out, voice high on ecstasy. His knee goes between my legs, and I lean against him, letting myself grind down on his leg. 
“Was it not just a trick to get me here? Don’t think for one second I haven’t seen those glances you give me when you think I’m not watching” 
“Josh…” 
“Don’t worry, when I’m finished with you, you wouldn’t  have to be so secretive anymore” 
He grabs the hem of my sweater, making me sit up a bit to drag it off. I’ve been home alone all day, so a bra was not necessary, leaving me half naked, the cold winter air from the window making my nipples hard. 
“Oh lord…” 
“Not gonna even the playing field?” I tease, tugging at his shirt. He laughs and unbuttons it, undressing quickly and throwing the garment on the floor. He does the same with his belt, dragging it off his jeans and leaving it on the floor. I feel a tug on the bottom of my pants, and he drags them off with ease, leaving me only in my panties. 
“You’re so fucking beautiful” he comments, laying himself on top of me again and capturing my lips on his. I feel around his upper body, gracing each curve and muscle. My hands wander to his back, pulling him closer, making him lay more of his weight on me. The kisses get wetter and sloppier as we keep going, my pulse going faster than ever before. I pull away a little, needing to take a breath. He uses the opportunity to work on my chest, kissing down my collar and groping my chest. His mouth keeps sucking, leaving dark marks all over my upper body. 
“Josh, please” I whimper, feeling the need overcome me. This is too much, I need him down there, fucking me senseless, just as I’ve always wished for. 
“I love hearing my name coming out of those pretty lips of yours” 
He moves lower, kissing the inside of my thighs and stroking my folds over the soaked fabric. 
“You’ve been wanting this for a long time haven’t you?”
I take a couple of deep breaths before answering, my body dysfunctional from all the waiting and different types of simulations. 
“Y-yes I have” 
“And you finally got what you wanted”
“Please” 
He raises his head, looking up at me. That stupid smirk is still plastered on his face as he’s come face to face with the reactions he gets out of me. 
“Say it again” There’s no use fighting him, my body begging to be touched. 
“Please” 
“Again” 
“Josh, please” 
“As you wish” 
His head goes down again, biting and licking my thigh as his fingers slowly drags my underwear off. It falls off my feet, and his tongue takes a long lick over my folds. My immediate reaction is to close my legs, but his hands stop me, holding both of them in their place. He takes a chance, one of his hands moving to my heat, stroking over the wet area. 
“You’re already so ready for me” 
His tongue finds its way to my clit, licking soft circles as one of his fingers moves inside me, curling upwards. My legs jolt again, but he doesn’t mind, instead keeps pumping his finger and getting me off with his tongue. I feel my edge come closer, and I try to hold it, not wanting to come so incredibly fast. 
“I know you’re holding back dear” 
I try to come with a reply, but it leaves my lips as incoherent erotic melodies, going in tact with his rhythm. He takes out his hand, relieving some of the pressure which is begging to be let out. I try to steady my breathing, but am interrupted as he puts another finger in, filling me even more up. His tongue applies more pressure than before, and I can’t control myself as I come all over him, spilling my juices down his fingers and lips. 
I take deep breaths, ecstasy washing over while throwing my head back. Fuck he’s good. I feel my legs twitch from all the action, pent up stress and energy leaving my body as the high lowers. 
I hear something hitting the floor, and look up to find him standing in front of me. Naked. Big. Holy shit, how am I supposed to take that. 
“You look scared” he smiles, going on top of me once again, giving me sweet kisses. I taste myself on him, but the passionate nature of it is almost… romantic. 
“Just, surprised” I manage to breathe out. 
“Oh, you haven’t seen nothing yet” he teases, giving me another passionate kiss. His dick graces over my folds, coating itself in my last high. His hand goes down to adjust himself, but before he inserts himself, he looks down at my flushed face, waiting for something. 
“You want this?” 
“Yes I fucking want this, Josh please” 
He doesn’t need to hear anything else, slowly inserting himself in me. I throw my head back, feeling him fill me up, widening my walls. He groans as he keeps going, letting out a deep breath as he’s all in. He waits a couple of seconds, still holding himself up over me. 
“Fuck, you feel so good” he exclaims, cheeks red and breath heavy. 
“Please keep going” I urge him, and he starts moving. Slowly going out and slamming deep into me again. It takes a couple of pushes for him to get his rhythm back. The room fills with both our moans, and I pull him down, killing some of them on our lips. 
He takes hold of my thigh, pulling my whole leg up, letting himself deeper inside. My nails scratch his back as he keeps going, both of our orgasms building up. I hold on to him, chest against chest, his pelvis rubbing against me as he slams himself in and out. 
“Let me ride you” I whisper, and he stops for a bit, taken aback by my request. 
“You sure?” 
“Get on your back” I breathe out, trying to sound stern. My tone fails me, and I just sound desperate instead, but I don’t mind. I want him, I need him. He obliges, laying down on his back. I move on top of him, and he looks up at me, mouth agape and eyes blank. He’s so turned on, so hard and so desperate. Probably as needy as me. I steady myself, lowering my body onto him, letting him inside. I bit my lip to stop my noises, feeling him go deeper than before. 
I watch his face, cheeks still pink and skin shiny. His mouth keeps opening, letting out the most vulnerable sound I’ve ever heard from him. 
“And I thought you looked good on top” I start, feeling a smirk find its way to my lips. “Turns out you’re even better under me” 
“Fuck, you’re gonna make me come” he whimpers, grabbing hold of my thigh, bouncing me up and down on him. 
“That’s the goal” I lean down, kissing his collar and neck while still bouncing my ass on him. 
“You’re so incredibly hot” 
His grip tightens, probably leaving red marks which’ll last for days. I feel my core building up, getting awfully hot and tight. 
“Josh, I’m going t-”
“Do it, do it” 
I can’t hold myself, coming all over his cock, tightening around him. I give a cry, body sweaty and hot as I try to keep the rhythm going. The pain starts getting to me, the cause of overstimulation and exhaustion. He notices, and uses his hips and arms to turn us around. 
I slam back into the maddress, my breath being knocked out of me. I don’t get time to regain it as Josh ups his pace, slamming into me harder and faster. I grip the sheets, trying to stay grounded as I feel my whole body rocking back and forth. He leans forward, intertwining my hand in his, while still keeping up the pace. I grip his hand hard, tension building up again as he uses the other to rub my clit. 
“I love you like this, all fucked out” he whispers, making me tighter. I wince as I come another time, pain and pleasure shooting through me. I’ve lost feeling in my legs, letting them hang weakly around his waist. He grunts and moans, burying himself in me as he reaches his orgasm. I feel him twitch inside me, sloppily pulling out as he collapses beside me. His hand goes to my chin, turning my head towards him before leaning forward for a kiss. I let him, sinking into the small action. 
“Still stressed?”
“More exhausted, but no, I’m not stressed” I explain, slowly regaining control of my pulse. 
“Need a power-nap?” I nod, and he walks to the bathroom, coming back with a warm wet cloth and cleaning me up. We both drag ourselves to the top of the bed, getting under the covers and relaxing. I lean into him, feeling his body sink down. 
I think about the essay, everything I could’ve done in the time we fucked. The theme is hard, and the texts are difficult, but… Shit!
“Omg” I exclaim, sitting up. 
“What, is something wrong?” he asks, looking up at me with concern. I stand up, walk to the desk and grab my computer before laying down with him on the bed again. 
“I suddenly understood this one passage” I exclaim, not feeling that tired anymore. I actually understood something! Finally! 
I open the computer, and start typing on the related paragraph. This was gonna be good, I could finally get the parallel I wanted, and compare it to the subtext. 
“Well, I’ll be laying right here if you need me again” he makes himself comfortable, kissing my chin and letting his fingers rub soft circles on my arm. 
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