#if I came back I'd have to start anew

[moonchild1]

 kim taehyung fic rec list (Ⅴ)

hello everyone i know it's been a while since i posted, work has been hectic, but i got some time and managed to finish a list so please enjoy i have a few lists ready to post so i'll que them up... here's my all time favourite taehyung fics, please show lots of love and support to these wonderful authors and their blogs, leave a heart, reblog or even leave a message or feedback under their posts i know they would appreciate hearing from you, some of these fics contain smut so no minors allowed you will be blocked ♡ feel free to recommend me some fics or just share what your reading right now i'd love hearing from you 🖤✨

a- angst s- smut f- fluff

series

only here to sin by @gimmethatagustd s a ft. namjoon

When your genius of a boyfriend returns to Harvard for his sophomore year of college, you never would have expected to have his worst enemy keeping you entertained in his absence.

our gray winter by @vyduan s a ft. jjk

“Were you looking for this?” Taehyung asked as he handed you the box of tampons you always bought. He remembered. You wanted to sink into the floor and die. Instead, you recalled your manners and said, “Thanks.” You put the box in your basket. “I can’t believe you remembered.” He beamed at you. It was patently unfair how he could look all glowy and soft while you looked… not like that. “Of course, Y/N.” If possible, Taehyung’s voice dropped even lower. “I remember everything about you.”

schemes and tricks to win her heart by @crystaljins ft. ksj

Rich company heir Kim Seokjin has a plan to win the heart of the girl of his dreams, and you, his little brother’s best friend, are dragged along for the ride. His younger brother objects, of course.

camboy!tae by @hisunshiine f s a

Give me all of your love, gimme something to dream about. KTH is your favorite camboy, and as a loyal subscriber, you are chosen to test out some new features on the platform he uses to go live. He’s really good at selling his viewers a dream, and as a thanks to a new milemark he’s hit on the platform, he’s choosing one winner to get their fantasy scene. 

tolerate it by @archivedkookie s a

Taehyung is your husband, and you love him. If only he loved you back; if only he cherished your love and not tolerated it.

what was hidden by @daechwitatamic s a ft. myg

This is how it all starts: Taehyung is flunking Western Lit. You're assigned to tutor him. His paper on Strindberg's The Ghost Sonata could pass or fail him for the semester. As you and Taehyung slowly become friends, then more, you learn that there's a lot more to him than you originally assumed. Together, you navigate your own experiences with the play’s themes: one's "true self" versus one's "shown self", darkness behind the facade, and how people can be quite literally haunted - and it has nothing to do with ghosts.

complete faith by @daechwitatamic

It’s Taehyung himself who admits that it’s usually around the one-month mark that he starts to lose interest in his relationships. So even though you’re so drawn to him you can barely stand it, even though he’s attentive and funny, even though you’re helplessly crazy about him… when you start dating, you feel like you’ve got an expiration date from day one. But will it be Taehyung’s issues that get in the way, or your own?

and they were roommates by @hoseok666 f s a ft. jjk

it all started with a rejection from your longtime crush, jeon jungkook. you decided to confess to him on your last day of high school. after a harsh rejection and a rough summer dealing with the heartbreak, you were starting anew once your freshman year of college came. you were going to be sharing an apartment with two other roommates that you don’t even know. what a surprise you’re going to be in for once you find out it’s the one and only: jeon jungkook and kim taehyung. 

with a brush of fate by @yoongiofmine f s a

Your roommate was sure she found you the perfect man. Her boyfriend believed he found Taehyung’s soulmate. The only problem was that you never wanted to date an idol and he never wanted to drag you into this life. Taehyung didn’t even know what he wanted anymore and was tired of being criticized for simply growing up. You just wanted to finish university and do something for yourself. What started out with the meddling of your friends became something neither of you expected. Could the two of you be what the other is missing? Or would things just fall apart?

groovy by @kinktae f s a

Even in the 70s, it goes without saying that you shouldn’t have feelings for your best friend’s little sister. 

tempting by @/kinktae s a

Y/N is an angel. She steers clear of the seven deadly sins, especially lust. She runs into a demon but, luckily for her, that demon doesn’t seem to buy into that whole “Angels and Demons are sworn enemies” idea. But unluckily for her, he just so happens to be the very embodiment of sin. Especially lust.

talk by @gukslut f s a

Finals week is kicking your ass, thank goodness you have a friend to help you relieve some stress. It’s a great arrangement, as long as no one finds out... as long as you don’t catch feelings. What could go wrong?

somebody to love by @cutechim

kim taehyung wins the heart of everyone he meets, and you—his self-proclaimed work “nemesis”—are not an exception.

tear you apart by @bratkook s

I want to hold you close, soft breasts, beating heart, as I whisper in your ear, ‘I wanna fucking tear you apart.’ demon au

clairevont by @/bratkook f s a ft. jjk

The second year of college starts off with a bang until you find yourself tangled in between your fuck buddy Kim Taehyung and his innocent room mate Jeon Jungkook.

free use by @littlemisskookie f s a

You tell your crush you want him to have full control of you in every way always. He obliges.

lost myth of truelove by @sugalaritae f s a

for six months you wait for him, a weekend spent together, finally able to reach the man your soul is tethered to.

because of you, blue by @ugh-yoongi f s a

nearly a year out from your breakup with taehyung, jin begs you for help saving his failing restaurant. the two of you aren’t exactly friends, but you feel some stupid sense of obligation and, really, what’s the worst that could happen?

true love by @jjkeverlast f s a

in which you're face to face with your ex again after 5 years, because both of your friends start dating each other.

obsidian by @kpopfanfictrash s a

The world of magic is divided into dark and light, witches and warlocks, choice and fate. You’re a prodigy of light, a witch who works within the police force. You’ve heard of Taehyung in passing, spoken in whispers as the warlock of dark who has the world holding it’s breath.  All this changes on the night you’re assigned as security for a mysterious singer named V and you come face to face with Taehyung himself. What happens after that might be fate.

baby, baby by @hobiwonder ft. pjm f s a

When you’ve run out of savings to continue on to the last semester of your Bachelors - you take an unorthodox route. Helping a desperate couple have a child and getting paid for it? Heck yeah. But what do you know - it wasn’t as easy as it sounds.

entangled by @caelesjjk ft. jjk s a

He saved your life twice. But he’s also been your sweet lab partner in college for the past two years and now someone who is more than just a friend. You care about him…maybe even love him. But something tells you that you aren’t quite sure what love even is. How could you when you have feelings for someone else as well. Kim Taehyung is the handsome stranger you’ve seen around campus and somehow ended up dancing with at Club Onyx. You were upset that Jungkook had stood you up once again and Taehyung made you feel like you were on top of the world. What you didn’t know that night, is the dark secret Taehyung is trying desperately to hide, but the closer the two of you get the more difficult that becomes.

buzzed by @junqkook f s a

maybe ordering a vibrator and letting your best friend open your mail wasn’t such a great idea.

queen cobra by @fantasybangtan f s a

when your boss offers the chance to take down the nation’s most lucrative gang from the inside out, you know you’ll do it no matter what the cost… even if that means entering an arranged marriage with the kingpin himself.

pulse by @rohobi f s a

You fell in love with Kim Taehyung during Medical School. Now living totally different lives in completely different hospitals, you're pulled together again as if by fate during a code black when someone plants a bomb in your hospital. 

things we don't say by @wintaerbaer f s a

Three years after graduating college, everything seems to be falling into place for you: stable job, cozy apartment, and a long-term boyfriend with a ring box hidden in his desk drawer. But when a mutual friend makes a remark that your best friend of nearly two decades is clearly in love with you, you realize that life may not be as simple as it seems.

mars by @to-star-lake s a

ahistorical au, military au, yandere!taehyung

satisy by @suga-kookiemonster f s a

 “listen,” taehyung says, eyes wide and eager as he smiles at you. “i figure we can just help each other out. i scratch your back, you scratch mine.” but when you find yourself suddenly in need of a massive favor, exactly how much scratching are you willing to do?

no kisses by @icedmatchatae f s a

It's championship week! The most anticipated week of the school year; however, leading up to the events, you and your council must collaborate with the football team to promote school spirit and pride. Unfortunately, you're forced to work with your number one enemy, Football team captain and fuck boy, Kim Taehyung, known for having a mysterious "no kisses" rule.

beyond desire by @strwberrytae s a

it’s never easy falling for your best friend when you have so much history. it’s especially difficult when you both share the same sexual desires and lifestyle. taehyung is a dominant CEO of a well known company in Seoul and you are an up and coming editor. while both of you come from a troubled and dark past, you lean on each other for support and comfort. what happens as your feelings blossom and grow over the years? what happens when you fear taehyung may be falling in love with someone else? will you confess your feelings or remain in the shadows?

one-shot

crazy for you by @oddinary4bts f s a

 you’ve known Kim Taehyung your whole life. When you meet again at a party hosted by your best friend, alcohol looses your lips and you spill your secrets to your childhood crush. Will Taehyung give in to your desire, or will you be struck by remorse?

seventeen times 17 by @cutaepatootie f s a

You loved him Seventeen Times 17.

ten out of ten by @shadowkoo f s a

For the past three years, Kim Taehyung has made it his mission to annoy you relentlessly on campus, finding every possible way to drive you up the wall during your shared classes. However, as you both enter your senior year, something strange happens. Taehyung begins to sense a shift in his energy, realizing he might just have some secret feelings for you. What unfolds when you make this earth-shattering discovery too?

under wraps by @jungkxook f s

there’s nothing you and taehyung seem to hate more than each other - except for christmas. having recently been dumped by your (now ex) boyfriend only seems to make this holiday even worse. but when taehyung suggests that you should pretend to be dating each other to save you both the embarrassment, pity, and bothersome questions from family and friends alike for a fun carefree month of celebrations, you can’t possibly say no.

always the bridesmaid by @kookingtae f s a

When you first meet Kim Taehyung, you’re determined to find every reason you can to hate him—or maybe he’s just looking for ways to get on your last nerve. But when a turn of events has the two of you working the wedding of the man you’re hopelessly in love with, you’re too late to realize the real reason to hate Kim Taehyung is because of the latest column he’s secretly writing: “Always the Bridesmaid, Never the Bride”, and it’s all about you.

any way you want it by @noteguk s

in which your best friend, Taehyung, finds out about your unsatisfying sexual experiences and decides to put an end to that track record himself. 

sharing is caring by @jjkpls f s ft. pjm

Taehyung is taken aback when his soulmate, Jimin, introduces his new girlfriend to him. Jimin tries to help them break the ice.

the end of all things (and the beginning of us) by @/kidguk f s a

the end of the world has come and passed, but there is still much to live for. there’s hope, there’s tomorrow, and there’s that guy you met while scavenging for supplies in an abandoned cinema. turns out he hates being alone, and the feeling is mutual.

aberrant by @kth1 f s

Meeting a handsome and rare fox hybrid was the last thing you had expected in a world of coexisting hybrids. What you also hadn’t expected was how this fox found a liking to you, showed up randomly at places where you were and next thing you knew - you were falling, hard, for the man.

lost in you by @/jjkeverlast f s a

the infamous kim taehyung, campus fuckboy and heartthrob is much more than you thought after an unexpected night.

the dinner date by @diortae f (ao3)

pretending to be on a date with your best friend to get a free meal at the fancy restaurant jeongguk works weekends at doesn’t sound so terrible, all things considered. there’s just one small problem: you’re pretty sure you’re in love with the aforementioned best friend.

until yesterday by @jimlingss f s a

You and Taehyung are hopeless as you are hopeless romantics. But five months after tying the knot and saying "I do", you're hospitalized after a car accident with him. But upon waking up, the doctors tell you that you don't have a husband.

the forsaken by @yoonia s a ft. knj

In order to save your people from the danger of drought and hunger, your father had sent you out on a mission across the ocean to find the heart of nature that could bring back the prosperity which your land had long lost. As the Chief’s daughter, you took the mission as your responsibility, even if you had to let the man that vexes you the most join you in your journey, even if you had to ignore the Elders’ warnings about the dangers and all the vicious monsters lying in wait.

blacklist by @httpjeon f s a ft. jjk

after departing from your dom, you’re assigned to two incredibly powerful men.

1-800-music-street by @/httpjeon f s

↬you’re enchanted by a street performer and then he saves you, resulting in multiple meetings one can only describe as fate.

farner boy i love you by @strawberrynamjoon f s a

↬Needing change in your life you decided it would be a brilliant idea to move to your uncle’s small farm, helping him and your cousin Jimin with the daily work. What you didn’t plan was to fall in love with your beautiful yet very annoying neighbour Taehyung, who seemed to make it his personal mission to tease you every chance he got. And what you expected even less was that he seemed to like you too.

waterloo by @/kinktae f s a

↬Taehyung is a famous but pessimistic art prodigy who doesn't believe in love. You are an art student studying in Paris, who sees the world through rose-colored lens and is a certified cheesy romance film enthusiast. And this is your love story. Or, “Well, it is the city of love. Maybe you just need to fall in love."

get you the moon by @bymoonchild f s a

↬Life has its ways of fucking with you, but you know you’ve hit 50 feet below rock bottom after being tasked to do a profile feature on Kim Taehyung, the varsity football captain, for your school newspaper. Pure torment awaits you, but this is alongside glassy eyes, pink cheeks and conflicted feelings that you’ve never dared to imagine with the likes of the devil incarnate.

fate of the fast & furious by @prolixitae f s

↬you’re a first-generation college student and taehyung is the hot guy with a love for motorbikes who lands the job babysitting for your family while you’re away.

fast & fearless: what comes first by @/prolixitae

↬taehyung is used to earning his keep through illegal street races, and he’s got every reason to win that upcoming promise of prize money for an old friend. but when the odds don’t fall in his favor, he turns to babysitting. enter, you: a first-generation college student with too much to lose to be spending all your time with a troublemaking biker. who also happens to babysit for your kid brother.

cobalt blue by @hobivore s ft. jjk

↬you ask Jungkook to draw you like one of his French girls. 

let it snow by @/suga-kookiemonster f s

↬it all started by accident, but it continues by choice—even before you began sleeping together, things with your friend taehyung have always been comfortable and easy. simple, and this new arrangement between you is certainly no exception to that rule. well...that's definitely what you thought before a major snowstorm traps the two of you in his apartment over the holidays. now? now, it is quickly becoming apparent that things are a bit more complicated than you realized.

muse by @/suga-kookiemonster f s

↬this could finally be tae’s big break, but he’s nervous and struggling to find inspiration. luckily, you’re willing to support him in all ways necessary.

falling, falling gone by @johobi f

↬Taehyung. Captain of the soccer team. Master of your heart. You'll never tell him for fear of rejection. So why the fuck are you about to do it in front of dozens of his peers?

new tricks by @geniuslab f s

↬When your newly adopted puppy turns out to be a lot more work than you expected, a cute dog trainer comes to the rescue. You soon become friends, but you begin to realize friendship might not be all you want.

guns & roses by @chateautae f s

↬he was cold-blooded, stone-faced and ruthless; a formidable force anyone in the criminal underworld sought to destroy. and he didn’t care, so long as it was never you.. anything but you.

saudade by @chateautae f s a

↬a demanding idol lifestyle was something taehyung and yourself were all too familiar with. it wasn’t so hard when considering your unconditional love for one another, but lately, taehyung wasn’t the same anymore; and you decide it's time to find out why.

strands by @xjoonchildx s a

↬taehyung can't figure out how he got separated from his men, or how he ended up stranded in these woods -- hurt. the only thing he knows is that he has no choice but to rely on the beautiful, secretive stranger who's found him.

cheap skate by @/gukslut f s

↬Who doesn’t know Taehyung and his lady? Cutest couple in town, I’d say, and have been since they started dating in their college days. Oh, that was a while ago, though. And still, they’re happy as can be in that place they have together. Almost hate seeing one without the other, y’know, it’s like seeing just one testi- oh, right, I’m not supposed to talk like that. Anyhoo, I only say that because I saw Taehyung at a jewelry store the other day while I was buying my sweet Jiminie his presents. Maybe that boy’s finally gonna pop the question, but I do hope he’s got a good plan for it. Something sweet and romantic. Maybe I’ll find out after Jiminie gets back from that cabin he’s visiting. 

definition of love by @taegularities f s a

↬When the gorgeous student from your literature class starts showing interest in you, you discover that there's much more to him than his know-it-all facade. But is this realization enough to get through your insecurities and secrets?

↬looking for other kth fics or the other members check out my library for more

[suguae]

Haunted

part one - part two

જ synopsis. After months of longing and uncertainty, you reunite with your ex-boyfriend Toji and his son Megumi at a nearby diner, where the warmth of their presence fills you with hope for a fresh start and a renewed sense of family.

જ pairings. T. Fushiguro x Fem! Reader

જ a/n. You thought I'd give you guys the silent treatment for month again, probably. But I'm back and I'm going to try my best to upload normal again, keyword TRY.

Six months had passed since the last echo of Toji's voice had graced your ears, each day stretching into an eternity of longing and uncertainty. The memory of his deep, resonant tone lingered like a gentle caress against your skin, stirring a tempest of emotions within you. As you navigated the labyrinth of your thoughts, one question loomed larger than all the rest: was Toji doing okay?

Was he still grieving over his dead wife, or had he begun to heal? And if so, was he ready to love you anew, to embark on a journey of rediscovery and redemption together?

The piercing ring of the phone shattered the fragile sanctuary of your thoughts, jolting you back to the stark reality of the present moment. Your heart quickened its pace as you glanced towards the source of the sound, the glow of the screen casting an eerie illumination in the dimness of your tiny apartment.

Toji's name flashed boldly on the display, a beacon of light cutting through the darkness of the night. A surge of emotions welled up within you—surprise, anticipation, and a tinge of apprehension—all swirling together in a tumultuous whirlwind.

It felt like a sign, as if he had heard the silent echoes of your thoughts reverberating through the ether. Could it be mere coincidence, or something more? The very idea sent shivers down your spine, igniting a flicker of hope within the depths of your soul.

With trembling fingers, you reached out to answer the call, the weight of uncertainty heavy upon you. Was this the moment you had been waiting for, the chance to bridge the chasm that had separated you two for so long? 

You brought the phone to your ear, the anticipation hung thick in the air, each heartbeat echoing the rhythm of your longing. You couldn't help but wonder if perhaps, just perhaps, fate had finally decided to intervene.

Thoughts of Megumi danced on the periphery of your consciousness. Were you guys finally ready to confront the demons of your past and embrace the promise of a brighter future?

The word slipped from your lips like a fragile prayer, carrying with it the weight of all the unspoken hopes and fears that had lingered between you two for so long. "Hello?" you repeated, the sound hanging heavy in the air, waiting for Toji's response to break the silence.

For a moment, there was nothing but the steady thrum of your heartbeat echoing in your ears. And then, finally, a soft exhale on the other end of the line, the faint rustle of movement as Toji gathered his thoughts.

"Hey," his voice came, soft and tentative, yet infused with a warmth that washed over you like a gentle wave. The sound of it sent a shiver down your spine.

you held your breath, waiting for him to continue, the anticipation mounting with each passing second. And then, with a quiet resolve, you spoke again.

"It's been a while," you said, the understatement hanging heavy between the two, a testament to the distance that had grown between you both in the wake of your shared pain. "How have you been?"

The question lingered in the air, pregnant with meaning, a silent plea for honesty and vulnerability in the face of the uncertain future. And as you waited for Toji's response, you couldn't help but wonder if perhaps, just perhaps, this conversation was the first step towards healing the wounds that had long divided you both.

Toji's words hung in the air like a delicate melody, each syllable carrying with it the weight of a thousand unspoken truths. "I miss everything about you," he confessed, his voice soft yet filled with a longing that echoed in the depths of your soul. The vulnerability in his words was palpable, a raw honesty that stirred something deep within you.

As his plea washed over you, you felt a flood of emotions surge to the surface—love, longing, and a flicker of hope amidst the shadows of your past. The ache of separation had carved a chasm between you, but in that moment, his words bridged the gap with an unspoken promise of reconciliation and renewal.

"I need to see you," he implored, the urgency in his tone resonating with the echoes of your own heart's desires. The longing in his voice tugged at the strings of your soul, igniting a spark of courage within you.

With a steady resolve, you met his plea with a whisper of your own, "I need to see you too." The words hung in the air, heavy with the weight of all that had been left unsaid, yet brimming with the potential of what could be.

Toji's insistence reverberated through the phone, his words a fervent plea for connection and reunion. "We can meet up, somewhere… anywhere, baby, just tell me," he urged, the desperation in his voice pulling at the strings of your heart. The prospect of seeing him again, of bridging the chasm that had separated you for so long, filled you with a heady mix of anticipation and apprehension.

And then, as if a beacon had been lit in the darkness, he spoke his name—Megumi. Your heart skipped a beat at the mention of him, a rush of emotions flooding your senses. He wasn't your child, not biologically at least, but the bond you shared transcended bloodlines. From the moment you had met him, he had nestled his way into the deepest recesses of your heart, filling a void you never knew existed.

The thought of seeing Megumi again, of wrapping him in your arms and showering him with the love he deserved, sent a surge of warmth coursing through your veins. He was a constant presence in your thoughts, a beacon of light in the darkness that had enveloped your life.

"Yes," you breathed, your voice barely above a whisper, "Yes, let's meet." The words hung in the air, heavy with anticipation and the promise of a reunion long overdue. And as you made plans to come together once more, you couldn't help but feel a sense of peace settle over you—a quiet reassurance that, no matter what the future held, you would face it together, as a family.

During the aftermath of the breakup, you found yourself spiraling into a dark abyss of self-destructive behavior. Drinking became a crutch, a futile attempt to numb the ache that gnawed at your soul. Overworking became a distraction, a way to bury yourself in tasks and responsibilities to avoid facing the gaping void left by Toji's absence. And as the days stretched into weeks and months, the toll of neglecting your own well-being became painfully apparent.

It was all too easy to place blame on Toji, to cast him as the villain in the narrative of your shared pain. But deep down, you knew the truth—it wasn't his fault, not entirely. You had chosen to entangle yourself with a widower, knowing full well the complexities and challenges that came with loving someone who was still grieving.

Yet despite the turmoil raging within you, a glimmer of clarity began to emerge amidst the chaos. The realization that no amount of self-destructive behavior could mend the shattered pieces of your heart, nor could it bridge the chasm that had grown between you and Toji.

Slowly but surely, the bad habits began to wane, replaced by a newfound determination to confront the unresolved issues head-on. You stopped reaching for the bottle as a temporary salve for your pain, recognizing that true healing could only come from within. You eased up on the relentless pursuit of productivity, learning to prioritize self-care and introspection over the relentless pursuit of perfection.

It wasn't an easy journey, fraught with setbacks and moments of doubt. But with each passing day, you grew stronger, more resilient in the face of adversity. And as you looked back on the tumultuous path that had led you to this moment, you realized that the key to finding peace lay not in blaming others, but in taking ownership of your own happiness and well-being.

As the agreed-upon time approached, a sense of anticipation and nervous energy coursed through your veins. The prospect of seeing Toji again after months apart filled you with a heady mix of emotions—hope, uncertainty, and a tinge of excitement. The void that had loomed large in your heart in his absence now seemed poised to be filled, if only for a fleeting moment.

You arrived at the nearby diner with a fluttering heart and a whirlwind of thoughts swirling in your mind. The familiar sights and sounds of the cozy establishment offered a sense of comfort amidst the uncertainty that lay ahead. The soft glow of the lights, the gentle hum of conversation, and the aroma of freshly brewed coffee enveloped you like a warm embrace.

As you stepped inside, you scanned the room anxiously, searching for Toji's familiar figure amidst the sea of faces. And then, there he was, sitting at a corner table, his gaze locked on yours as if he had been waiting for you all along.

Sitting next to Toji was the little toddler, his bright eyes sparkling with excitement at your appearance. You couldn't help but smile as you caught his gaze, feeling a warmth spread through you at the sight of him. Megumi reached out eagerly towards you, his tiny hand outstretched in silent invitation.

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taglist is closed.

[kurokawaia]

❛ He's Unexperienced ❜

Postwar!Virgin!Uchiha Sasuke X fem!Reader

WC; 2.6k+ | ! MDNI ! | TW/CW; afab reader, she/her pronouns, oral -> male receiving, blowjob, experienced reader, reader is the dom here, reader is playful and flirty, PIV, PWP, riding, grinding, fem!dom x male!sub

⋆·˚ ༘ *𝑅𝐸𝒬𝒰𝐸𝒮𝒯 :: (filled request) Hello :) l have a new request for Sasuke again , can you please write first time with Sasuke , like he is a virgin ( sorry I have a virgin kink :,) and reader has some experience. Like they liked each other in the academy days and were together in team 7 but after he left the village reader tried forgetting him by going out with other boys . Could you please make reader soft Dom and flirty / playful , you can make them in his baddie arc or postwar (whatever you want) , sorry I am demanding too much details but this is what came to my mind :)) - @enouche

honey's a/note :: I have made sure to add your two other requests into this, the morning after and the bj :) -> req2 req3, THIS WAS LONGER THAN I MEANT IT TO BE LMAOOO

m.list | naruto/boruto m.list | uchiha m.list

It had been several years since Sasuke left the village, pursuing his own path of vengeance. For {Y/n}, his departure had left a void that seemed impossible to fill.

She hadn't bothered to help in bringing him back, she didn't want to, it was his choice, right?

Before Sasuke came back she was filled with an empty feeling, a need to forget. She would walk through Konoha, her mind drifting back to the days she spent with Sasuke. The memories were bittersweet; She had loved him deeply, but that love had turned into a painful reminder of what could never be.

{Y/n} began to seek sex in the company of others. She dated different men, hoping to find a connection that could help her forget Sasuke. With each relationship, she gained more experience in all aspects, love, what to give, sex, learning about herself and what she wanted from a partner. However, none of them could truly replace the space Sasuke had left in her heart.

Her first relationship after Sasuke departed was with Kenta.

Next was Hirosh.

Then there was Daichi.

One evening, as {Y/n} strolled through the village, she felt a familiar presence. Her heart skipped a beat, and she turned to see Sasuke standing there. He had returned.

"Sasuke," she whispered.

He approached her slowly, his expression unreadable. "{Y/n}," he replied softly. "It's been a long time."

They stood in silence, the weight of their shared past hanging heavily between them. Finally, Y/N found the courage to speak. "Why are you here?"

"I've finished what I needed to do," Sasuke said, his gaze never leaving hers. "I've come back to make amends. Naruto brought me back."

{Y/n}'s heart ached at his words. She had spent so long trying to move on, yet seeing him again brought all her feelings rushing back. "I... I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything," Sasuke replied, taking a step closer. "I know I've hurt you. And I understand if you can't forgive me."

Tears welled up in {Y/n}'s eyes. "Sasuke, you left a hole in my heart that no one else could fill. I've tried to move on, but..."

Sasuke gently wiped away her tears, his touch sending shivers down her spine. "I never stopped thinking about you, {Y/n}. I realized too late what I had lost."

{Y/n} looked into his eyes, searching for the truth in his words. She could see the sincerity, the regret, and the hope. "Sasuke," she began, her voice trembling, "I don't know if we can go back to what we were. But maybe we can start anew."

A small, rare smile appeared on Sasuke's face. "I'd like that."

The weeks passed in a blur of shared moments and tentative steps toward rebuilding your relationship. You and Sasuke spent your days training together, reminiscing about the past, and forging new memories. With each passing day, your bond grew stronger, the wounds of the past slowly healing.

One evening, as you sat on the rooftop of your apartment, watching the stars, an unspoken tension filled the air. The closeness you shared had become undeniable, the unaddressed feelings bubbling just beneath the surface.

"Sasuke," you began, your voice barely above a whisper, "do you ever think about... us?"

Sasuke turned to you, his gaze intense and unwavering. "Every day," he admitted. "I think about what we could have been, and what we could still be."

Heart pounding, you took a deep breath. "I've been trying to forget you, to move on. But no matter how hard I try, you're always there, in my heart."

Sasuke reached out, gently cupping your face in his hand. "I've made mistakes, {Y/n}. But if you'll have me, I want to make things right. I want us to have a future."

Tears filled your eyes, but this time, they were tears of hope. "I want that too, Sasuke."

Without another word, Sasuke closed the distance between you, capturing your lips in a kiss that was both tender and passionate. It was a kiss that spoke of years of longing and unspoken feelings, a kiss that promised a new beginning.

As your lips parted, you gazed at each other, breathless and full of emotion. Sasuke's hand slid down to your waist, pulling you closer, and you responded in kind, wrapping your arms around his neck.

Your kisses grew more intense, fueled by the pent-up desire and the deep connection you shared. Sasuke's hand roamed your back, his touch sending shivers down your spine. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him closer still.

Time seemed to stand still as you made out under the starry sky, the world around you fading away. In that moment, nothing else mattered—only the love you had rediscovered and the promise of a future together.

As you finally pulled away, both breathless and flushed, you rested your forehead against Sasuke's. "I'm glad you're back," you whispered.

Sasuke smiled, a genuine smile that lit up his face. "So am I, {Y/n}. So am I."

"Sasuke..." you asked slowly, "I..."

"What is it?" he asked, confused.

You press your lips against his once more, your tongue slipping into his mouth causing a surprised groan to leave his mouth into your own. The arm wrapped around your waist tightened, pulling you closer to him.

Pulling away from his mouth, your hands place themselves onto his chest, nails lightly scratching his covered skin, skin that you so desperately wanted to see. "Can we fuck, please," you ask, a flirty undertone in your voice.

Sasuke's eyes widen, not knowing what to say. "If you don't want to-"

"I haven't done anything like this before," Sasuke replied, a soft pink hue coating his pale cheeks and you let a soft smirk spread onto your plump lips.

"Well," you say, whispering into his ear. "Good thing you have me here to help you out with that."

"Have you..." he trailed off slowly, unsure what to ask you, not wanting you to feel offended.

"I have had sex before, Sasuke," you reply swiftly and you could see Sasuke's jaw clench. "Only because I wanted to forget you," you reassured. "But you have me all to yourself now."

Sasuke let out a hum before he forwardly gripped your hair and smashed his lips against yours, wanting to hear the soft mewls that escaped your mouth previously when you two kissed.

A gasp left your mouth. Not only from the sensation of Sasuke kissing you with a new fervour but his bulge was prominent in his slacks, pressing against your soaked cunt. "Sasuke," you breathed out against his lips. "I-Inside," you smirk.

And then, you two messily made your way to the bed. You discarded Sasuke's shirt and slacks while you were left in a softly laced bra and plain panties. You pushed Sasuke to the bed and sat onto his lap, tongue entangling with his once more while Sasuke didn't know what to do.

You were experienced, he thought, and he wasn't. He had no choice but to let you and your forward, flirty demeanour to take over every single inch of his body, a dull sense of pleasure coursing through his veins. But, the more you continued to make Sasuke groan against your lips the more the pleasure was growing stronger in his body.

"Can I touch you?" you asked, breathing heavily.

Sasuke's head lolls back against the bed head, a lump being swallowed evidently in his throat, and the sight make you swell while your nipples perked underneath the lacy fabric. "Yeah," he replied, a his hand running through his hair.

My eyes lit up and I slipped his boxers down, his thick and long length hitting his abs. A hiss leaves his mouth at the contact. You held the base of his cock with one hand while your other hand went for his throbbing tip, Sasuke jerked at the sensation, a shaky hand covering his mouth.

Your fingers continued the play with the pre-cum spilling from his slit before the flat of your tongue slide slowly up the underside of his shaft, feeling the veins that rippled up to the head of his cock.

Sasukes head was thrown back but his eyes remained on yours, your eyes looking up at him, innocent and doe, although, Sasuke now knows what you truly are capable of. Sasuke continued to cover his mouth with his hand which made you pout.

"Sasuke," you called, letting your tongue leave his swollen length which caused a deep sigh to leave his mouth. You pull his hand away from his mouth and guided it to your hair, making him wrap his fingers around the tousles of your hair. "You being quite quiet, but I wanna hear all the sounds lave your mouth, 'kay?" you continued in a gentle tone, a smirk interlaced with your voice in the process.

But all that Sasuke could do was finally let out a groan when the hand that was gripping his base slid up and down slowly, sliding effortlessly due to his slick that beaded at his tip. You felt his grip loosen around your hair. "Ah ah," you hum to him caused him to let out an annoyed sigh, clearly he wasn't aware that he could make any sort of those lewd noises.

Mellos head was thrown back while a deep groan emitted from his lips while his grip tightened in my hair. My fingers played with the slit of his shaft, spreading the precum that spilled from his swollen tip causing a hiss to leave his mouth.

Finally taking his throbbing length into your mouth, your tongue swirling around his pink tip before you made your way down his cock. Trying to take him as deep as you could without gagging. You used one of your hands to jerk the rest you couldn't possibly take down. Your other hand slayed on his lower abdomen.

Groans left Sasuke pretty lips, and they get more frequent when you take him further into your hot and slick mouth. "Such pretty sounds," you say as you lift yourself from his length before going down again, wanting to feel his come spill in your mouth, wanting to feel how his body will jerk and tremble under your touch.

Sasuke began to move your head through the tuffs of your hair, and you hummed in content, feeling so happy that he was finally having some dominance over you. You loved how you were almost gagging on his length, but you still wanted more of him.

Tears began to well in you eyes at the pace and gagging at every hit. HIs eyes widen at the sight of your doe eyes spilling with tears as you took him in your sloppy mouth. Sasuke sped up the pace of his movements, causing more tears to spill from your eyes. He lets out a chocked moan as you hollowed your cheeks which caused him to falter in his advances. His load spills into your mouth as he pulls away from you.

You instinctively let the sticky load spill from your mouth, letting the white liquid fall onto the bed beside you. Wiping your mouth you straddle Sasukes lap. His eyes were closed and was breathing heavily before his eyes snapped open at his dick being clenched by something again, but walls that were softer and tighter.

“Fuck, Sasuke... So big,” you moan, feeling the thick, lengthy cock split you open. A moan rasped from Sasukes mouth as you sunk yourself down onto his cock, still hard and throbbing. Your eyes lit up at the sound, the noise going straight to your gummy walls. A pleasured sigh leaves your mouth while Sasuke's hand went straight to your hip, gripping your plump flesh.

Your hands splayed themselves on his abs as you were now flush against his abdomen. A moan leaves your lips as his cock was perfectly hitting that soft, gummy spot inside your cunt. No words left Sasukes mouth but he absolutely loved the feeling of your hot walls tightly squeeze his dick, the words replaced by the groans and moans that he found out, you loved to hear.

"Sasuke," you breath out, beginning to move your hips, moving up and down the full length of his cock. Your clit grinds down against his abdomen, adding extra tingles to shoot through your body.

"{Y/n} please," Sasuke groans, his hand gripping your hip tighter.

"Huh?" you smirk with a humoured tone, struggling to keep up with the pleasure and converse with him at the same time. "Do you want to come?"

"Yeah," he replies breathlessly.

"Where, love? Inside? I'm not opposed," you giggle.

Sasuke's hips jerk up into your own, causing your body to fall forward and his arm wraps around you back as he fucks into your body, moans spilling from your mouth. Sasuke and you pound int each others, moans and chant of each others names spilling from the two of your mouths.

Sasuke squishes himself deeply inside you, a loud groan slipping from his mouth as his come spills thickly inside your now full womb. You came at the same time and there was a creamy ring of your mixed comes around his softening lenght.

You slide yourself off and you let out a soft whine before pressing your lips against his, his tongue slipping into your mouth.

"I love you, Sasuke," you say against his lips.

"I love you," he replied, love coaxed in his pupil blown eyes.

The kitchen was filled with the delicious aroma of freshly prepared food, mingling with the lingering warmth of their recent closeness. Sasuke stood behind you, his arms wrapped around your waist as you both leaned against the counter. His breath was hot against your ear, sending shivers down your spine.

"I want you again," Sasuke murmured, his voice low and husky. He tightened his grip on your waist, pulling you closer to him.

You chuckled softly, turning your head to meet his gaze. "We need to eat, Sasuke. The food's getting cold."

His dark eyes bore into yours, a smirk playing on his lips. "I don't mind if it gets a little colder."

You playfully swatted his arm. "Come on, we can continue later. Besides, you need to keep up your strength," you teased, reaching for a plate of food.

Sasuke sighed, his grip loosening slightly. "You're right. But don't think I'm letting you off the hook that easily."

You smiled, handing him a plate. "I wouldn't dream of it."

Do not copy, steal, modify, etc. Relogs and like are appreciated.

m.list | naruto/boruto m.list | uchiha m.list

taglist :: @enouche @lovelyandproblematic

@sugu-love @why-are-you-still-awake

[yanderes-galore]

57.) "You're stuck with me, like it or not." For Yandere Zoro who has a hobby taking his childhood friend on his adventures weather their like it or not 🩴 ( I was thinking platonic but romantic works as well ) please 

Sure! Just to let people know, this prompt was from my own list so it's not linked. I also made the pairing vague as Zoro's actions can go either way in this. I'll admit, the plot differed from the request but I wasn't sure where to go with it? Hope you like it either way :(

Yandere! Roronoa Zoro Prompt 57

"You're stuck with me, like it or not."

Pairing: Platonic/Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Overprotective behavior, Controlling behavior, Isolation, Violence, Swearing, Threats, Forced companionship/relationship.

Zoro has never let you out of his sight since you were young. Even when he left your village to be the world's greatest swordsman, he vowed to take you with him. Being friends and a fellow orphan like him... you agreed at first as you also wanted to see the world.

Back then you craved adventure, something different than home.

You haven't returned to your village for years. In fact, Zoro got lost. Which meant you had to stay beside your childhood friend.

Zoro has often dragged you on adventures since your youth. Be it exploring your own island or the seas beyond it... Zoro insisted you be there.

He always wanted you to support him through his goals.

Even when separated from Zoro, the swordsman always somehow found you again. You two could be considered inseparable. Hell, even when he joined Luffy's crew, you were dragged to come along.

Why?

Well it's not like he can abandon you now.

You're Zoro's closest companion. Part of you wonders if he took you with him due to the death of Kuina. You wondered if he was doing this because he didn't want you alone... or if he feared being alone.

Your life was never all that stable with Zoro. The swordsman insisted on never leaving you alone. Whenever he left to explore a new island, you came with.

You knew it was Zoro's hobby to take you on adventures. Originally it was fun. You cared for Zoro, you followed him everywhere...!

Yet even you were getting tired of all the dangers pirate life and life beside Zoro subjected you to.

It was to be expected that you and Zoro parted ways eventually. In reality, you should've parted years ago in your village. Pirate life was fun and full of adventure...

But you only ever did it for Zoro.

"I think I've had my fill of... this, Zoro."

His reaction was expected. The normally stoic Zoro's face shifted into surprise when you confessed your worries. He appeared speechless while you two sat on the boat in private, an uneasy look in your gaze as you glanced out at the sea.

"I mean... I adored our adventures when we were younger. Being a pirate with you didn't sound like something we'd do... but I did it because you wanted to. Unfortunately... I don't think I can accompany you much longer."

"What's that supposed to mean...?" Zoro finally managed to say, staring at his childhood friend in bewilderment.

You take a deep breath, looking back at him.

"I want to start a new life. I want to find an island to start anew. I'm not a fighter, Zoro. I help you all out, yes, but I'd be better off living a life somewhere else."

"You know you can't do that..." Zoro sighs, refusing to leave your side and scolding you like a disobedient child. "You've... never been away from me."

"I can't stay with you forever..." You push, but Zoro shuts you down.

"Where do you plan on going? You have a bounty like the rest of us. You said it yourself, you can't fight... You'll die." Zoro responds coldly, eyes narrowing at your idea.

"Zoro, I'll hold you back—"

"You never have before! If you leave, you'll die. The government, pirates, something will get you. You need me, dumbass." Zoro scoffs, making you glare.

"Zoro, just support me on this..." You plead.

"And let you die? Never. I can protect you and this crew just fine. You and I stay together. Our adventures? Together." Zoro scolds again, making you more irritated.

"... I don't care what you say. Someday, we'll part ways." You grumble defiantly, only for Zoro to harshly grab you and pull you closer.

"You know how much blood I've spilt to protect you?" Zoro growls lowly. "Enough to show I'm completely devoted to you... yet you want to leave me?"

You squirm in the grasp of your childhood friend, mumbling uneasy apologies. His grasp only seems to tighten. His gaze is dark, staring you down in an intimidating gesture.

"You think I'm even going to let you off this boat after this?" Zoro hisses. "You aren't leaving this boat until you snap out of this doubt of yours. Even if it means I have to lock you in your quarters due to being a danger to yourself!"

You freeze when Zoro barks at you, the swordsman huffing at your silent state.

"You're stuck with me, like it or not." Zoro sternly states as though it's a fact. "Even if I leave the crew, you're coming with me. My adventures are yours too... always have been."

Zoro soon lets you go, causing you to stumble back with some fear in your eyes. Zoro's never... been like this before. He really is desperate to keep you....

"Nothing's going to change how I feel." Zoro grumbles, turning around, "Snap out of it... I'm never abandoning you..."

Zoro then turns to look over his shoulder, you're trembling. His gaze only softens momentarily, as he's clearly still pissed that you would attempt to leave him.

"I'm expecting you to never abandon me either... Even if I have to remind you."

With that, Zoro walks off to no doubt nap or train...

Leaving you to fear your childhood friend and what he's capable of.

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

Three. Four. Five. || Toxic!Husband!Price

For @glitterypirateduck's “O, Captain!” writing challenge! I used prompts:

30. "I hate you but if anything happened to you I'd burn the world" vibe.;

42. The story spans over a period of 10 or more years;

78. Give us a "That's my Wife!" moment.

Rating: E Words: 3.3K cw: toxic couple, VERY toxic, insults, death wishes, smut fade to black, pregnancy. Tags: f!reader, you/your pronouns but no Y/N, miilitary/court martial inaccuracies, very bad family dynamics?, dark humour??. Summary: John and Reader are in the worst fucking marriage ever. A collection of moments, dialogues and scenes from their terrible relationship. a/n: They are SO fucking toxic and dumb, I cannot- This is also very different from the stuff I usually write. This is ALSO not particularly angsty, more so dark humour.

There was a time when you loved John Price.

With all your heart, all your soul (and all your pussy).

That time was when you were young.

Ages 14 to 21, you loved him. He was your first kiss, your first time. High school sweethearts, you supported him through the academy, he supported you when you went to university. 

You stayed together through his first and second deployments. It was like an old-timey WW2 romance. 

So many letters exchanged back and forth. All lovey-dovey, with faint pen ink and smudged blotches on the pages as you made plans for the future.

Phone calls with spotty service and loads of static, only five minutes per soldier, 5 minutes which he’d spend only ever spend talking to you, asking you to relay any other messages to his mum, dad, siblings so he wouldn’t have to hang up with you. 

Polaroids clipped on the inside of envelopes which he would then slip into the breast pocket of his shirt, keeping you over his heart… one he’d often pull out and look at during transpo, thumbs tracing your eternal smile.

Polaroids of yours, a bit more risqué, which he would keep tucked into a journal under his pillow, for his eyes only.

John would walk around overseas with a smile on his lips after getting a letter or a call from you, brag to his teammates about his “bird back home”, never going out to bars to find one night stands like they did…

But sometime after his second deployment and joining the SAS, the puppy love that had lasted for years started to dwindle. 

Slowly but surely, you found that you were both growing distant.

You assumed you were both growing a bit ‘comfortable’, perhaps complacent… like all relationships tend to get after a while. 

By that time, John and you had already moved in together and you were no longer consistently alone for months at a time waiting for him to return from deployment. You blamed it on that. Plus, you’d been together for years by then!

But it felt different. There was distance, emotional and physical. Whenever he cuddled up to you, you felt cold and so did he. The kisses to your forehead were meaningless, the dinners at home eerily silent.

And between the distance and the inability to make proper plans, proper dates, celebrate milestones together, forgotten anniversaries, overlooked birthdays… It turned into arguments. 

And one argument turned to three, to five, to seven… hundred.

You found yourself growing bitter, angry, hateful.

It wasn’t a sudden shift or anything.

Not like you woke up one day and the one thought in your head was “I hate him”...

But you remember hating him longer than you ever loved him.

You tried breaking up. And failed. 

Some… bastardised feeling of guilt came to the forefront of both your minds at the idea of throwing away 5 6 7 8 9 10 years together, and giving up on your first love… and maybe even fear of having to start anew with someone else.

So, you simply continued going through the motions. You got engaged, big shiny rock on your finger, all big smile, but no tears came when he proposed. Your families were ecstatic, not quite able to see through the thinly veiled deceit.

For the wedding, you pulled out all the stops, stressed yourself out preparing the ceremony and reception with the women in your family (and his! His mother and sister were so happy that John was getting married!), going wedding dress shopping…

You had a beautiful ceremony, John wearing his full dress suit, army green, with the beige SAS beret. You were both 27, and together for 13 years.

Then, came the honeymoon, which was cut short. Not that it was a true honeymoon. Just three days in a coastal town in Northern France, having to be within a day's drive of Hereford lest he get called out for a sudden mission, which he was.

Not that you expected any different from him. So the distance continued growing, as did the arguments.

You hated him. He hated you.

Then came the predictable “So, when can we expect some grandkids?”. You put it off for a couple more years, blaming it on your high-priority careers, the law and the military, so similar and so different; his lack of time at home and how regrettable it’d be for you to be alone through the pregnancy; the want to be ‘more present’ for the future kids, needing to wait for things to settle down a bit more…

You’d been together for so long at that point, 15 years under your belt, starkly aware that neither of you is going anywhere. The world keeps spinning and your relationship hasn't ended. Fuck it, might as well go for it.

And now here you are.

It’s been eighteen years since you met. Aged 32, you no longer have arguments, you have throwdowns. You pull out every weapon in your arsenal. Neither of you plays nice.

Insults are traded often. Death wishes even more so. And, more often than not, they’re delivered with such a deadpan nonchalance that you’re sure people would think you both psychopaths.

“Going on a mission. ‘ll be back in a few days.”

“‘Kay, hope you die.”

“So do I.”

-

“Just had a fender bender with a stupid bloke. The car’s at the shop. Taking an uber to the base to get your car.”

“Okay. Shame you didn’t die a fiery death.”

“Don’t remind me, already cried about it.”

-

"I'm getting discharged."

"Why?"

"Shot."

"And it couldn't have killed you?"

-

“Can you get out of the damn toilet? I’m bleeding.”

“Period, accident, or just part of your satanic rituals?”

“Period.”

“Tough luck. Hope you bleed out.”

It never gets physical, never violent. John would rather die than lay a hand on you and you’d never DARE lay one on him. It’s just a lot of yelling, a lot of insulting, a lot of throwing things around, and, especially, a lot of revenge plans being executed to drive each other crazy.

Like recently. You found out John had gotten a grey-haired wig about the same length and texture as your hair, and has been snipping off a few hairs at a time, planting them around the house to blame you for leaving your hair everywhere, while simultaneously making you feel like you’re going grey. So, you put grey hair box dye in his shampoo and beard oil, to make him think he’s going grey.

Or three months ago, when you replaced all your lightbulbs with dimmer ones and lowered the brightness on all electronics, to make him think his eyesight was starting to go bad. You drove him so mad that he had voluntarily signed up for sniper assessments because he was worried he’d become a liability for the team.

Or eight months ago, when John had to return home in the middle of the day wearing a ruined uniform and just about ready to blow smoke out of his ears, having ripped holes in the uniform midway through a meeting all because 2 or so weeks prior you had painstakingly undone part of the stitching on it after an argument, and that had resulted in him baring his hairy thighs and armpits to a boardroom full of officers.

It’s bad. Very bad. You’ve had your windows and doors insulated to make sure the neighbors don’t hear your screaming matches and call the cops on the “domestic violence” happening next door. 

You probably shouldn’t have kids with this man. And yet-

He drives you insane.

And you’ve TRIED to fix it! You did. Marriage counseling, rage rooms, axe-throwing, paintball matches, yoga, meditation.… Nothing worked! In fact, it only infuriated you more because:

“You’ve got a tactical advantage, you need to play with a handicap!”

“Tough luck, sweetheart. Get good or get shot!”.

-

“You can throw harder than that.”

“Oh, I’ll show ya throwing hard, you gobshite!”

“Okay, when are you planning to start?”

-

“My back hurts-”

“Because you’re getting old.”

“Fuck you.”

“I’m just telling you the truth. Face it, John, if the downward dog hurts your back, then you’re old.”

-

“Can you breathe any louder?”

“Yes, I can. Wanna see?”

“Just shut up. I can’t hear myself think.”

“Not much to hear either way, pretty hollow in there.”

“I hate you.”

“Feeling’s mutual, sweetness.”

There are only three occasions when you’re not actively at each other’s throats. Other, then, of course, when John’s working, especially when he’s overseas. You can’t fight if he’s both a) not home and b) unreachable via calls or texts or e-mails.

When you need a favor from the other, something you can’t quite do, or that falls in the other’s ‘jurisdiction’ in house chores.

“The washing machine’s leaking.”

“Turn off the water main, I’ll go check in a sec.”

“Mkay.”

-

“Here. Popped a button.”

“I don’t have any more army green thread.”

“Then use brown or black or whatever.”

-

“Where are your car keys?”

“What for?”

“Going to get it washed and detailed.”

“My purse.”

-

“You’re not gonna wear that, are you?”

“Why?”

“Besides the fact that it’s wrinkly? That’s a ‘house’ shirt, not a ‘going out’ shirt. Wear this one instead.”

2. When you’re both complaining or dealing with an outside force, a 3rd party, together.

"Excuse me, hi, I'm sending this back it's not cooked the way I asked."

"Ma'am that's exactly what you-"

"Are you calling my wife a liar?"

-

“Oh, fuck no. Why the fuck is he winning the Great British Bake Off?"

"Hm? Oh- oh! Yeah, why the fuck is he winning?"

“Bloody hell, he rolled his pastry too thin and had watery pie filling-”

“Wankers. This is not fair.”

-

“John. John!”

“What?”

“Look-”

“Blood hell, he’s back early-”

“Yeah and her boytoy’s car still there. They’re definitely still going at it.”

“Oh, this is going to be fun.”

-

“Excuse me! Hey, excuse me! Pick up after your bloody dog! NO, don’t you start with me, you keep leaving your dog’s shite right by our garden, don’t you see the sign my husband’s posted up?! Pick it up or I’ll do it and then drop it in your garden.”

3. During sex.

Marching into the bedroom after breakfast, you find John combing through his hair in the bathroom mirror. The room is steamy from the hot shower he just took. 

“Take your trousers off. I’m ovulating.” You warn him as you wave your phone in the air, showing off the period tracking app.

“I literally just showered.” John replies as you’re already shrugging off your robe and pajamas.

“Well, believe or not, I don’t control my ovaries, John.” You reply. “Now take your trousers off.”

“Already on it.” He replies as he already starts taking off his shirt and sweatpants, leaving them on a pile on the floor, before his boxer briefs follow suit.

His hand palms his cock as you’re getting comfortable on the bed, tugging on it lightly as he watches your fingers do the same between your legs. 

“Can we try to enjoy it this time?” He asks you in earnest.

“Sure.” You reply simply. “Been a while since we’ve had proper sex and not…”

“Not a breeding session?” He quips as he kneels on the bed between your parted thighs. His hand replaces yours and he starts rubbing your clit for you.

“Shut it…” You quip, while your own hand wraps around his cock, stroking it slowly. John lowers himself onto you and his lips slowly brush against yours before he kisses you.

No, as it turns out… There are actually four occasions when you’re not actively at each other’s throats:

4. The Kid

In a day like any other, you’re lying in bed, reading a book. It’s a lazy Sunday morning, your big, round belly feeling particularly heavy. You’ve stolen every other pillow in the house to try and find some comfort, which you fail remarkably at.

“I think I’m going grey.” John states to no one in particular.

He’s in the en-suite bathroom, applying beard oil across his mutton chops like he tends to do, about three times a week.

“You are.” You remark in a bored, dismissive tone as you read a book in bed.

“That’s not funny. I’m not that old.”

“You’re getting up there.”

“Look who’s talking, we’re the same age.”

“What’s that supposed to mean, Jonathan?”

“It means you’re there yourself, darling.”

Raising your eyes from the book in your hands, the bottom of which rests atop your pregnant belly, you cock a brow at your ‘beloved’ husband.

“And this is coming from Santa Claus?” You retort swiftly.

John peeks his head out of the bathroom door to look at you. “You think you’ve got a leg to stand on, you crone?”

Grunting under your breath, you glare at him, and he glares at you, complete silence in the bedroom. 

There’s something in that face of his, the look in his eyes, those STUPID fucking mutton chops that you’ve told him to shave and he refuses…

Grabbing your book and rolling it into a cylinder, you hurl it at him, putting as much force behind your arm as you possibly can. It misses the mark, but only because he had the presence of mind to duck. 

“You’re such a fuckin’ knobhead!” You insult him, tongue dripping with bitterness.

“Wel, not like I can be anything else, really, when I’m married to such a raging cunt.” He retorts.

“OH FUCK YOU!” You retort.

“ALREADY AM MORE THAN FUCKED, SPENDING THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH YOU.”

“OH, PLEASE, YOU’RE MORE MARRIED TO YOUR BLOODY GUN THAN YOU ARE TO ME!”

“YEAH CAUSE AT LEAST MY GUN DOESN’T DRIVE ME FUCKING MENTAL!”

“OH PISS OFF!” You shout, your face twisting with a scowl.

“You know, you really shouldn’t be stressing yourself out like this. It’s not good for your blood pressure. Or for John Junior.”

“First of all, it’s not gonna be a boy. Secondly, even if it is a boy, we’re not naming him after you. And thirdly, how about you die, then I won’t get stressed.”

“And why would I do that, when I can stay right here, perfectly alive and healthy, and watch you give birth to John Junior, and have the pleasure of rubbing a ‘I told you so’ right in your face?”

“Oh fuck you. It’s not going to happen.” You sulk and cross your arms over your chest, leaning back against your mountain of pillows.

“Someone doesn’t like the idea of having a son that takes after me, hm??” John teases as he comes up to the bed, a brow cocked.

You trail him with your eyes as he sits next to you on the bed. “Absolutely not. I wanna have a child I actually am able to love, and not one that I have to lie to.”

“A mother’s love knows no bounds, huh? What a load of crap.” John quips.

“Oh, that’s 100% true. I love this baby to bits already, but if it takes after you… I’ll probably die.”

“Good.” John remarks, causing you to roll your eyss. “Much better than if our child takes after you. Spawn of Satan, he would be.” John’s hand slides up your leg and slowly cups your swollen stomach.

“I should probably address the fact you just called our child ‘Satan’s spawn’, but I’m more concerned over the fact you keep calling the baby a ‘son’.” You murmur as you uncross your arms and watch him caress your skin.

“I feel like it’s a boy, I don’t know what to tell you.” He replies as his calloused fingers drag over the stretch marks and linea nigra on your stomach.

“What if it’s a girl?”

“What about it?”

“I’ve seen enough men online getting pissy over havin’ a daughter.” You quip and cock a brow up, looking him in the eyes.

John’s eyes lock onto yours. “Not me.” Then they return to the belly as he continues rubbing you. “Would love a little girl too.”

“Hm.” You remark and slowly, your hand rubs over the belly on the opposite side, where John’s hand isn’t. “We’ve gotta promise not to yell or argue in front of the baby.”

“Kind of hard to do that when I’m married to the Devil.” John quips, causing you to look up at him, eyes narrowed.

“You’ve gotta promise. We’ve gotta promise.” You murmur as you look at him.

For a moment, his usually grumpy face softens and he nods. “I promise.”

Nodding as well, you echo the sentiment. “I promise.”

No, wait, five:

5. When you have his back.

“General, that is not what I asked you. I would ask that you stop beating around the bush, feeding me, the jury, and the people watching at home, fabricated information and embellished words in a sorry attempt to save your credibility. Stick to the questions being asked and stop wasting our times.” You warned the man as you paced the space in front of the stand.

“Me and everyone else in this room are looking for nothing but the truth, or must I remind you that you are under oath and also live on television?” You ask outloud as you turn to look at him.

“No, counselor.” The General, a heavy-set, older, mustachioed man replies, through gritted teeth, his face showing a polite expression while the man himself was seething on the inside.

“Very well, then, I’ll repeat the question. Were you or were you not aware of the aforementioned, unsactioned operations being conducted in the Al-Mazarah and Urzikstan border, involving CIA and MI6 operatives?” You asked, eyes glaring into the man’s eyes as you leaned into the stand near him.

“Well, as with most operations...”

“A yes or no is enough, General.” You told him sternly.

“Yes.” The man grits out.

“And did you, or did you not, give permission for these CIA and MI6 operatives, working under the guise of NATO, and I quote, from the transcript: “Authority to use any means necessary” on the enemy forces?” You confronted him.

“Well-”

“Yes or no?”

“Yes.”

“And did you do that while being aware that the teams involved would interpret such command as permission to execute an operation in which they’d use ‘extreme physical persuasion’ or, in other words, torture to achieve their goals?”

“I-”

“Did you or did you not, General?”

“Yes, but-”

“And did you, or did you not, not only demand the censoring of the clear and transparent reports received in the aftermath of that operation but also sign off on them yourself, to circumvent the proper channels of evaluation, which would force an internal audit to be conducted?”

“Yes-”

“So, in short, you just confirmed that you authorized your troops to, essentially, wipe their asses with the Geneva convention and comit war crimes on the POWs under their care?”

“Counselor-” One of the judges called out.

“Withdrawn. No further questions, Mr. Chairman.” You told the Chairman and the jury panel that sat above you, as you swiftly turned around and marched up to your table, high heels clacking on the polished floors of the court room.

Your eyes locked onto John’s as he sat in the back of the room, wearing his full regalia, his eyes locked onto yours with a strange shine to them… Almost like he’s proud of you.

As soon as you sit on the chair and the Chairman once again takes over, addressing the room, the General, calling other witnesses, your phone’s screen lights up on the chair next to you.

Picking it up quietly, you spot a message of John’s:

John: that’s my girl. knew you could do it. you: you owe me big time. John: i do. saved my arse there. you: of course. it’s what I’m here for.  John: almost making it sound like you love me. you: no but I wouldn’t let anything happen to you. you: no way in hell you’re leaving me alone with 3 children. John: i see. selfish woman. you: shut up.  you: and try not torturing POWs next time. John: yes, ma’am.

Five occasions seem to be enough to keep a 23-year marriage afloat.

a/n: Big thanks to my beloved @crashtestbunny for helping draft/plot all these interactiions and just the general toxicity! And also @mothymunson your beloved Toxic!Price is here!

[ O, Captain! Masterlist ] || [ My Masterlist ]

[moonxytcn]

a night of new beginnings

Leighton Murray x fem!reader

summary – Leighton and you reconcile at home on a movie night full of hugs and kisses

warnings – fluffy

a/n – heyy! someone sent me an ask if I wrote about Reneé or her characters and I was thinking about it and this came out, I hope you like it

English is not my first language so there may be some errors.

–––

The night enveloped you both in a cocoon of tranquility as you and Leighton nestled on the plush cushions of the living room couch. Soft lamplight cast gentle shadows across the room, dancing with the flickering glow of the TV screen, which bathed you in a warm, comforting aura as it played the chosen movie for the evening. It was one of those rare moments when the outside world seemed to fade away, leaving only the intimate embrace of your shared space.

After weeks of tension and uncertainty, Leighton had summoned the courage to reveal her true feelings for you, stepping out of the shadows and baring her heart completely. The confession had sparked an intense confrontation, a whirlwind of emotions culminating in tears, harsh words, and shattered expectations. But now, as you sat side by side, there was a palpable sense of reconciliation in the air, a silent agreement to mend what had been broken.

Leighton's arm found its way around your shoulders, pulling you close as you settled into the movie. Despite the softness of her touch, there lingered a tension in the air, a fragile bridge between past hurts and newfound hope.

As the movie unfolded on the screen, Leighton's fingers traced absentminded patterns along your arm, the gentle caress a silent apology for the pain of the past. You turned to meet her gaze, the soft flicker of the TV casting a halo of warmth around her features.

"I'm sorry for everything." Leighton whispered, her voice a fragile echo of regret. "I was scared, and I acted foolishly. But I want to make things right, Y/N. I want us to work."

You smiled, a flicker of understanding dancing in your eyes as you reached for Leighton's hand. "I want that too, Leighton. I love you."

The words hung in the air, a delicate thread weaving between you, binding your hearts together once more. Leighton leaned in, her lips finding yours in a tender, apologetic kiss. It was a moment of vulnerability and forgiveness, a silent promise to leave the past behind and embrace the future together.

When you finally pulled away, Leighton's eyes were filled with a soft, hopeful light. "I have something for you." She said, her voice tinged with excitement.

You arched an eyebrow, curiosity piqued. "What is it?"

Leighton rose from the couch, a mischievous smile playing on her lips as she disappeared into the darkness of the room. Moments later, she returned, a DVD clutched in her hands.

"Do you remember the movie we watched on our first night together?" Leighton asked, her eyes sparkling with nostalgia.

You nodded, a fond smile tugging at the corners of your lips. It was a memory etched in your mind, a moment of connection and intimacy that had shaped your relationship.

"I thought we could watch it again." Leighton said softly, her gaze unwavering. "As a way to start anew."

You nodded, a rush of warmth flooding your chest at the thought of reliving that cherished memory. "I'd love that."

And so, you settled back onto the couch, the glow of the TV illuminating your faces as you lost yourselves in the timeless embrace of the movie. As you watched the scenes of love and redemption unfold on the screen, you knew that you were writing your own story, a story of forgiveness, hope, and a love that would withstand the test of time.

By the end of the movie, your hearts were light, your spirits lifted by the promise of a new beginning. You turned to each other, your smiles mirrored in each other's eyes, and you knew that whatever challenges lay ahead, you would face them together, hand in hand, hearts entwined.

And as the night stretched on, you savored each moment, each kiss, each whispered promise, grateful for the chance to start anew and to rediscover the depth of your love for each other. The world outside may have been uncertain, but in the warmth of each other's arms, you knew that together, you could weather any storm.

[iknowicanbutwhy]

alr. so normal about your off isat au.

however. i feel like it would be fun if things came in….waves? per loop.

like,loop one. There is Siffrin,the forest,and a quest. Nobody else except the specters,a king,and a shopkeeper. They finish their quest.

Loop 2. The world is spilt in three. V1 Siffrin turns into a cat and V1 Isabeau turns from a king to a capitalist.Odile and Mira get added.

Loop 3. V2 Siffrin gets the cat treatment,V2 Isabeau gets Sucre-fied,V2 Odile replaces V1 Odile who disappeared,and V1 Mira refuses to get replaced,destroying V2 Mira for the loop.Bonnie and the room is added.

im sorry for rambling in your asks!!! so sorry!!

I love your idea!! Different iterations of the worlds being created, worse and worse each time,, And there are so many different versions of the others >w> I'd love to see an AU like that.

I'm sorry to say this though, but I think I might have given everyone the wrong idea about how the AU goes? As a consequence of me taking so long to work on it and not talking about it fjdksl

I'll tell you this much so I don't blabber on and steal the thunder of your (cool!) ideas: There is no time loop here. This is a sort of,,, bad end to Siffrin and friends' wonderful epilogue.

The King wasn't right in what he did, but he had a point. The world did vanish from a very, very powerful wish. It just.. happened, one day. The reasons for how such a powerful wish managed to come true are just as elusive as how the world lost color, how the country disappeared, why people are separated from their sadness.

Only by the power of Siffrin's wish did he and their family survive.

They couldn't just wish the world back to how it was, however. They had to start anew.

And they tried.

[theambivalentagender]

Back a little over a year ago I decided to start growing a tomato plant on my porch to hell my mental health while unemployed. Now I didn't know you were supposed to trim shoots off of tomato plants regularly, and after a few rainstorms came through the plant overtook the flimsy stakes I'd placed and grew to madness.

I finally trimmed the hell out of it and reworked the stakes, then eventually found a proper tomato cage to contain it.

But I was looking at it today and found this:

It looks like one of the thicker sections of it got twisted nearly off a long while ago. You'd think a break like that would kill the entire branch, but i followed it up and

This is just one of several new offshoots from this branch.

And on the one hand this fills me with a nice fuzzy feeling and my human brain is making this a while metaphor for how you can keep growing anew even after severe trauma further back in your timeline or whatever...

But I'm also in awe and slight terror of tomato plants in general now, or maybe just this specific one. This isn't the first time this tomato plant has recovered and grown branches in seemingly impossible ways. This thing survived getting stuffed in my car for a week when we had construction.

Hell, I ended up saving the shoots I'd pruned off it and trying rooting hormone on them, expecting to get maybe one or two successes. Now I have fifteen Idiot Tomato Sons on my porch growing strong and I have no idea what to do from here.

[tumbleweed-writes]

Now That I Have You: Chibs Telford X OC Fic. Chapter One

This was the very first fic I wrote for this fandom like a million years ago. I'm currently giving it a rewrite/edit on A03, but thought I'd post it as I'm editing in case anyone wanted to check it out. Not sure it's my best work but it was my first.

=======

Molly Garrett let out a sigh pure irritation taking over as she turned the key in her little rundown blue Volkswagen bug. The ignition sputtered a few times as the car struggled to come to life.

Her honey blonde bangs hung in her dark eyes, damp from the heat of California sun and her lack of air conditioner. She struggled to bring her sad old car to life grumbling under her breath.

"Shit." She blurted out as the car sputtered a few more times refusing to start up. She widened her eyes realizing the word that had just slipped out of her mouth.

She glanced in her review mirror looking at the little boy strapped into the backseat clutching a Spiderman action figure.

Cursing wasn't exactly a good habit to have in front of a five year old boy who would more than likely pick up on the impolite language.

"Sorry baby. Don't say ever say that word okay." She apologized not surprised that the boy didn't respond to her.

Mason hadn't spoken in days. This entire situation hadn't been easy on either one of them.

Thinking about how frightened her little guy was made her want to break down. Her son was the most important thing in her life. Mason was her world.

She closed her eyes holding back the tears; she had sobbed enough in the past few years for a lifetime. Her son needed her to stay strong.

Molly let out a laugh feeling a small victory as her poor little bug finally came to life. She took a final glance in the review mirror making sure that Mason had remembered to fasten his seatbelt.

She smiled at the sight of the family dog sitting up beside Mason, a little fat female pug named Rocket. The poor dog was panting just as hot as her masters.

Molly made sure the coast was clear hoping that she could see as well as she thought she could around the small Uhaul trailer. The uhaul was hitched to the back of her bug blocking most of her view. She said a small prayer as she pulled out of the McDonalds' parking lot.

They had to eat cheap for this road trip, so cheap burgers and fries had been on the menu for days now. Luckly there was a McDonalds everywhere and that was often the easiest thing to get a five year old to eat.

She felt a little irresponsible letting Mason eat so much unhealthy food, but she reminded herself that it was just for this trip. As soon as they got settled she could get him back on a more well rounded diet.

Today all she'd managed to get down for lunch was a crappy salad and an iced tea. It had been the cheapest thing on the menu. At least Mason had eaten all of his chicken nuggets though. It seemed to be his favorite food and she'd hoped that it would cheer him up.

It would be okay, she reminded herself. Once they got to California and she was able to start her new job at Saint Thomas then everything would come together.

Charming, California seemed to be the perfect place to start anew. She'd sent in her application to several hospitals all over the country, but Charming had caught her eye and much to her relief the local hospital there had hired her on the spot with just a phone interview.

She'd chosen her new home partially for the name; Charming. It was silly she knew picking a home because of its name, but what better place than to start a new life than in a place called Charming?

At twenty seven years old, Molly Garrett finally felt like she was starting her life on her own terms.

She had faith that it would be a better life; a safer life for her son and her. She hoped and prayed that it would be a life that would hopefully be free of the violence they'd both long endured.

She'd escaped an almost six long years in a marriage from hell with a man who hit first and asked questions later.

Brian Parker had seemed like a sweet guy at first, Molly and he had met in college both in their final year. He had swept her off of her feet and had seemed to be a good match for her.

She'd been impressed by her husband when they first met. She's felt like he was a practical prince thanks to his affluence and his gentlemanly charm. She was just a poor girl on scholarship who had grown up in a trailer right outside of New Orleans with a single working mother and two siblings. She had come from so little and Brian had come from so much in comparison.

Brian came from a nice wealthy family; he had a promising future at a job at a nice well-established real estate firm. The job was at a firm that his family had owned for years. He'd grown up with privilege and he'd been so willing to share that privilege with Molly. He'd showered her with gifts and promises.

He had promised her a comfortable life with a nice safe home and a future full of children and maybe someday grandchildren. She could admit she'd been blinded by both the promises and the presents he'd bestowed upon her. He'd made her feel so special to be worthy of such expensive nice things. He'd given her jewelry and nice shopping sprees. It was more than she'd ever known. She felt like a fool looking back seeing how he'd showered her with such things and love bombed her as a way to lure her in

Two months after dating Brian, Molly had become pregnant. Soon after she'd found out she was carrying his child, they'd gotten married. She had been so excited starting a life with a man who she was sure would protect her from all of life's horrors.

It had turned out though that the only horror she would have to fear would be her husband.

The violence hadn't started until Mason was two. No he hadn't been always kind to her before that but it was the first time he'd put his hands on her at least in a violent act. He'd been belittling to her up until that point and sex had at times felt like something she was pressured into. She'd always blamed herself for his verbal abuse and had been in denial about the lack of consent in some of their sexual acts. She'd told herself she was ungrateful and horrible to deny him and when he'd insulted her she'd believed that it was her fault. She'd been taught to believe that she was so less worthy than him. She'd been conditioned to think that she was just the poor piece of trailer trash that he'd given an opportunity to rise above her station. When he lashed out at her, she told herself that it was her fault. The act of physical violence had stunned her.

Molly had excused the violence the first time it'd happened. She'd made excuses for her husband.

She'd tried to tell herself that Brian was under a lot of stress; his temper had just gotten the better of him. His father was his boss and he was the prodigal son expected to be a model employee and that wasn't easy when he was trying to support a young family.

Brian had apologized to her, promised her it would never happen again, but he'd lied. It seemed that his temper got the better of him over and over again. Soon the physical abuse was as just as regular of an occurrence and the emotional and sexual violence

It was the same cycle over and over again. He would apologize and claim he was a changed man or worst convince her that it had all been her fault really. When she thought about leaving he'd lure her back in. She would come back to him hoping against hope that this time would be different. It was insanity she knew; believing that each time would be different. Wasn't that the definition of insanity though; doing the same action over and over again expecting a different result?

She knew that she should have left the second Brian hit her but she'd been blinded by naïvety and a poor sense of self worth. Honestly she knew she should have been out the door the second he started to mistreat her verbally. She'd been blinded by him though. It felt as though she'd been under a spell.

Brian had killed her self-esteem telling her that no man would ever love her like him. No man would ever want her especially after she'd had a kid. She was his and that was that. He reminded her of how lucky she was; how privileged she was to have the life he provided.

Molly had had believed him for three long years. She'd hidden it all from family and friends and from Mason as well. She had played a happy loving wife pretending that her life was just peachy with her adorable son in her husband's nice old house.

Her breaking point had been when Brian had struck her in front of her baby. He'd had a long day at work and she'd made a mistake in his eyes by not having dinner waiting on the table when he got home.

Her brother had discovered the bruises on her body. Jack Garrett was no fool. Her brother knew about the violence and he'd tried to talk his baby sister into leaving time and time again. He'd even threatened to call the police.

Molly had finally started to see the light after that beating, and had started to listen to her brother. She had enlisted him in helping her leave, helping her find a job far away.

Brian found out about her plans to leave somehow, he had made her pay for ever thinking about leaving him. Bruising her body and cracking one of her ribs.

The abuse that night had been severe more severe than it had ever been. Mason had witnessed the entire thing.

The boy had witnessed his mother on the floor crying begging him to go upstairs and play. He'd watched as she'd cried out telling him that it was all okay when it clearly wasn't.

The boy had been silent since that night. Her body still ached from the violence her soon to be ex-husband had put her through.

It was as though a light switch had gone off in her brain when the violence had ended. She'd looked in the mirror studying her battered body when it hit her; she knew that she couldn't live like this. This wasn't a way to live; it was a way to die. If she stayed she would die and if she died her child would be left without his mother to protect him.

She had to save her baby from this life and from his father. She had no doubt that without her there to protect Mason, that Brian would turn the violence onto his child. He was already neglectful of the boy at best. Without her there to shield her child the anger Brian had inside him would have nowhere to find an outlet other than his son.

The morning after that beating, Molly's sister Candace had helped her pack up her things while Brian was at work. The two women had stuffed what little she had into a Uhaul trailer. She had left setting out west that night leaving her old life behind without a trace.

Candace had wanted her to stay in New Orléans, but Molly knew that she couldn't stay in Louisiana. The only way Mason and she would be safe would be if they disappeared.

That had been a week ago. Molly and Mason had been on the road for a week now and we're finally right outside of Charming heading for the rental home she'd recently signed the lease on.

The little house wouldn't be much; just a tiny two-bedroom house with one bathroom and a kitchenette and joined living area. It was dainty but in a quiet neighborhood.

Jack had found the rental for her; he'd been the one responsible for setting up her new life, arranging her lease and cosigning for her. She just hoped that someday she'd be able to find a way to repay her big brother. The home would not be much but it would be hers and that made it feel like a dream come true.

The little rental property was a big step down from the sprawling old plantation home that Brian and she had lived in for years. It had been in his family for decades a grand home that she had been so entranced by when they'd first married.

The people she knew had all been so jealous of her life; not realizing that it was a lie. Behind the old glorious home and fine lifestyle, it had been years of pain and fear.

She just hoped that the fear was over. The pain had to be over and it could never happen again, she told herself.

This was a new life. She knew that she had to make it work, not just for her but for Mason. Her baby boy deserved a good happy life. They both were worthy of a good life.

———————-

Molly rushed to get Mason ready for his first day of daycare. It was summer time so he wouldn't be able to start school for a few more months at least.

So for now the hospital's daycare would have to do. She had managed to land a job as a phlebotomist.

People were often a little freaked out once they found out that she drew blood for a living. She used to joke that she was the resident hospital vampire at her old job in Louisiana. She was always amazed Brian had even allowed her to maintain a job back home. She guessed he liked the way her job made him look. He'd been able to brag that his wife worked in healthcare and was so giving and kind. Her accomplishments at work made him sound better to those he wanted to impress. He'd been able to present them as a hardworking couple successful in their own careers. It was a career she loved. She knew now that her career was hers alone. She had worked hard for it. She was responsible for her accomplishments. Brian didn't get to take credit for her hard work.

She knelt down in front of Mason straightening his dark hair noticing that it had gotten a little too shaggy, but he wasn't too keen on hair cuts. His dark hair was one feature he'd inherited from his father.

For the most part Mason took after her; they shared the same hazel eyes, the same slightly round face, and the same smaller features such as their noses.

Molly spoke trying to sound cheerful and not stressed. "You're going to have a fun day today. You'll meet a ton of new friends, I bet. You're going to have such a blast. Maybe mommy can meet some new friends too. I bet we're both going to have a good day today."

Mason didn't reply. He only nodded his head as she leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

She pulled at her blue hospital scrubs knowing that she looked like hell. She hadn't had the time to straighten her hair, so she'd just pulled it back into a messy bun.

At least she'd managed to put on a little makeup though. So hopefully she didn't look like the walking dead. She knew she was exhausted though. She knew that the exhaustion would be all worth it. This was the first day of the rest of her life.

She hadn't had much time to unpack anything the night before. She'd spent all day before unloading the uhaul on her own. The first thing she'd made sure to do was unpack Mason's bedroom.

Her bed still remained disassembled and most of their belongings remained in boxes around the rental home. She had slept by Mason's side the night before, in his little bed on his Spiderman comforter. They'd eaten cheap pizza the night before surrounded by boxes and watching kid's movies on the portable dvd player she'd packed.

The little house was not what she'd hoped for. It was so hot inside that it felt like an oven. She had spent hours on the phone trying to get a hold of her landlord. She'd hoped that he could come take care of the problem, but so far she had been unsuccessful. He dodged her calls until finally making an excuse that it would take a while to get someone out to look at the problem. She'd been told that she was just one of the many properties her landlord owned, so she would have to be patient.

For now it seemed that Mason and she would just have to sweat it out and make do.

She took Mason's hand in hers as they left the house. She held the one hand that wasn't clutching his action figure.

The Spiderman toy seemed to be a comfort to him. He brought the toy everywhere he went. He even slept with it like it was some kind of teddy bear. She'd worried he might leave it at the daycare, but he seemed unwilling to even consider parting with it this morning. She was willing to allow him the comfort despite her concerns about a misplaced forgotten toy.

Molly turned on the radio to an alternative rock station as soon as they got into the car, hoping that she could entice Mason into his favorite activity. He loved to sing along with the radio though he was too young to get most of the lyrics right.

It always managed to make her smile seeing him sing along like he didn't have a care in the world. She lived to see her child happy. It had been the one thing that kept her going throughout her marriage to Brian. Her child had been a lifeline through the misery.

Her smile failed to come though as Molly glanced in the backseat and spotted her silent son.

She shook her head as she pulled out of her driveway hoping that maybe the daycare would help Mason come out of his shell.

She feared that Mason might never recover from what he'd witnessed. He was afraid, she knew that.

She had done her best to explain things to him in a way that a five year old would understand.

Molly had told him that they were going on an adventure, to a place called Charming. They were going somewhere where he would meet new people and get to live in a whole new house. She'd tried to sound upbeat and make it sound as though they were doing something so grand. She'd tried to keep positive hoping that it would hide her anxieties and fears.

She had been unsure what to say about Brian. Molly knew that the time would come when she would have to explain to Mason why he had seen daddy hurt mommy and why daddy wasn't here with them.

She just hoped that she could find a way to explain it all. It wasn't right, a five year old child having to see something that horrible. She felt so guilty for letting him witness it all. Deep down inside she knew Brian was the only one to blame for his actions. She knew she had been a victim in this.

She hated herself for exposing her beloved child to something so terrible though. She felt pure shame for allowing herself to stay with a monster out of fear.

Molly took a deep breath knowing that she would never allow that to happen again. No one would ever lay a hand on her or her baby ever again.

This was the right choice, she reminded herself. She was doing the right thing.

----------------------------------

Of course Molly's bug chose that morning to get a flat tire. She was just lucky that she made it to a garage before she got herself into a wreck. She had to think it was a miracle that there happened to be an auto mechanics close enough to reach. Perhaps God was looking out for her? She had to hope someone was looking out for her despite the flat tire.

Chibs Telford raised an eyebrow as a pathetic looking Volkswagen Bug pulled into the parking lot of TM Auto.

The car was a sad sight; the paint on the right side was chipped and fading and the transmission sounded just awful.

It was still early; the garage hadn't even opened yet. He had come in early though wanting to bury himself in his work to avoid thinking about his personal troubles. He was thankful for the work even if the garage was still technically not open. He knew that he could manage to get the owner of the car checked in and take care of business despite the closed sign on the door. He was grateful for the distraction of work. It was a relief to his over exhausted brain and aching heart.

Chibs made his way over to the car as it came to a stop and a young woman opened the drivers' side door giving him a smile.

"I've gotten myself into a real mess." Molly stated giving the man who was slowly approaching her a sheepish smile.

She ran reached up tucking her side bangs behind her ear as the man spoke. "I'd say I agree love. How are ya even runnin that thing?"

She raised an eyebrow a little taken back by his Scottish accent, and the word love. She had expected to hear neither from the mechanic. A Scottish accent was an odd thing to encounter in Northern California

Molly felt her cheeks flush as she found herself staring at the thin scars along the Scotsman's cheeks. She looked away fearing that he thought she was rude for staring. She mentally scolded herself for being so rude. She'd been raised with far better manners than to gawk at something someone couldn't help. She felt like a jerk for even staring away making so clear she'd been gawking.

Chibs wasn't surprised that she turned her eyes away from him after staring for a bit.

He had long ago become accustomed to people's reactions to the scars Jimmy O' had given him before he'd taken Chibs' family and banished him from Ireland.

The pain had finally ended now that he'd gotten his revenge. Now that Jimmy O' was dead and gone and he knew that his girls were safe.

He tried not to let his mind focus on his girls for too long. His girls made his heart ache more than ever lately. He knew they were safe but they were so far away. Things had changed between his girls and he so quickly.

Fiona and he had come to an agreement just a few months ago; their marriage was over. There wouldn't be a divorce on Fiona's insistence. In Catholicism marriage was a sacrament that couldn't be broken, so divorce wasn't an option...or that was what Fiona had claimed. Chibs felt bitter over the refusal to even consider the divorce. He felt bitter about it all to be honest. It hurt though he knew in the end it was right...ending the estranged relationship entirely...agreeing to just be coparents to Kerrianne.

It had hurt losing the wife he had so long pined for. No, he'd not been faithful to her during their time apart. He'd allowed himself to fall into the chaos of SAMCRO and the women who serviced the club. His heart had belonged to Fiona though. It felt painful to realize that his heart could no longer be hers. He had no idea where to place that love now.

At least he still got to see his Kerrianne. He made a trip to Belfast as often as he could to see his soon to be fifteen year old daughter, hoping that they could build the type of relationship a father and daughter should have.

Kerrianne had been told so many lies about her father, by Jimmy. It had been hard for Chibs to convince her that her da was a good man despite his status as an outlaw biker. He'd done his best to prove his love and devotion to her. He'd allowed her to remain in Belfast knowing it was her home. He'd sacrificed the chance to take her back to the states with him. He'd given up that dream letting her remain in her home knowing it was what she needed.

As time went by and Kerrianne and he became close. They spoke on the phone weekly and developed a relationship. He sent her gifts often. It felt as though a void that had long existed in his heart had finally been filled. He was getting a chance to be a father. He loved having his little girl back in his life again.

Chibs could admit that he was a little taken back by Molly's accent as well. It was distinctly southern; strange to hear in Northern California.

He was also taken back by the woman's features; he would be lying if he tried to say that she wasn't a beautiful woman.

She wasn't very tall she barely came up right at the center of his chest. Although she was petite she had a nice figure, full hips and breasts. He could spot the figure even in the unattractive scrubs she wore. Her hair was a dark blonde; almost the color of honey and her eyes were a pretty hazel.Her complexion was milky and smooth looking. Her hands seemed petite and her short nails were painted a lovely shade of lilac.

He found himself glancing down at her left hand at her ring finger. He was a little shocked that there was no ring there. Still though that didn't mean that she was single.

A girl like that had to have a man somewhere. He felt foolish for even looking for a ring. He knew that even if she had no man in her life. she would probably never want a man like him. It was a foolish hope thinking of her in that way; checking for signs of her being available. He felt like an old fool for even considering her relationship status.

It was her smile that really caught his attention. It was friendly despite the fact that Chibs often intimidated people given his appearance and his ties to Samcro. Usually people didn't smile at him. She had a pleasant smile though her eyes looked tired. He was not accustomed to people smiling at him so politely. The smile made him feel warm inside. He felt silly for the thought; feeling a soft cozy glow under her gaze.

Chibs snapped out of admiring her looks as he managed to speak. "Looks like ya hit a nail on the back right tire... and yer transmission is shite."

"Yeah...like I said, I've gotten myself into a mess...and now I'm late for my first day of work...great." She replied though the last part of her statement seemed to be more to herself than to him.

He was shocked as she opened the backseat and leaned in helping a little boy out of the car. The boy was tiny; delicate. Chibs was certain the kid was small for his age. The boy seemed healthy at least; his hair was dark, loose shaggy curls that made him look angelic. His eyes were identical to Molly's hazel bright and clear. The boy held on to Molly's hand staying close to his mother.

Chibs felt a sense of embarrassment realizing that he'd just cursed in front of a child. Sure he had done far worse in his life but he was sure that the boy's mother wouldn't appreciate his language. He grimaced sure he was about to get an earful about the foul language in front of a child even if had only been one word.

He did his best to give the boy a smile as he spoke up hoping to smooth over any upset he may have caused the kid's mom. "Sorry I said a bad word little lad."

Mason stared wide-eyed at the strange man not saying a word. He moved behind his mother's form hiding from Chibs' gaze.

Molly cleared her throat quickly speaking up trying to explain her son's silence hoping that the Scot didn't take it as rudeness. "He's shy."

Chibs nodded his head understanding. He'd found that most kids that didn't know him well enough were just as intimidated by him as adults were. Which he could admit was hurtful. He had always loved children. He had loved his nephew back in Belfast when the lad had been growing up. He'd spent so much time with him and had appreciated being involved in his life. Now though he knew that most kids tended to shy away from him. They took one look at his face and felt fear. He had found comfort in the Teller boys at least. He liked being Uncle Chibs to them. It had felt healing to be around the boys. He knew Jimmy O' had not taken being Uncle Chibs from him at least when it came to the Teller boys...his heart ached knowing that Jimmy O' had taken his nephew from him though.

Chibs pulled his mind from thoughts of his late nephew as he spoke nodding back to the poor Volkswagen. "We're a bit backed up ere, but I can get yer car in this afternoon. Don' know how long it'll take though, Love. Like I said, we're a wee bit backed up. Lotta wrecks last week, lots of folks coming through for summer trips getting into wrecks. Plus we gotta a few custom bike jobs ahead of ya. I can't promise fast work, but we'll get ya fixed up anyhow."

Molly gave him a smile thankful that her car would be repaired and not break down on her anymore. She spoke taking a look at the name stitched into his gray works shirt: Chibs, she found herself unsure if she should call him that or not. She was quite certain the man's parents had not given him such a name. "Thank you so much...uhm.."

Chibs raised an eyebrow realizing that she was asking his name. He took himself by surprise saying his real name and not the name everyone but his family called him. "Filip."

"Filip." She repeated causing him to do something else that he found astonishing. He felt a genuine smile develop across his face. He couldn't help but to like the sound of his name on her lips.

She spoke again reaching out to take his hand. "I'm Molly and this is Mason."

Chibs nodded in response as he took her hand in his giving it a firm shake, unable but to enjoy how soft her skin felt against his calloused hands.

He was shocked that he was so reluctant to let go of her hand. He shook his head wondering what had gotten into him.

Maybe it was just that he'd been alone for too long. He found himself unable to really get back into the biker lifestyle once Fiona and he had agreed to end their relationship.

All those years Fiona and he had been estranged he had found himself easily falling into a pattern, booze and croweaters.

He'd sleep with any one of the girls who hung around the clubhouse, a different girl just about every night.

Nights of drunken sex with women whose names he couldn't even remember by the next morning no longer felt fulfilling to him.

After Fiona and he had agreed to end their marriage, Chibs had found that he could not sink back into the life of meaningless sex with crow eaters. He had discovered that he just didn't enjoy it anymore. It felt cheap and it made him feel empty. At first he thought that maybe he was just getting old, but then he'd realized something.

He was lonely. He longed for something more, something real. He watched Jax with Tara and Gemma with Nero and he felt so alone. He laid in bed at night without anyone by his side and fretted over his future. He had come to the realization he would die alone without love. He'd so long hoped Fiona and he would reunite but that dream was dead and he knew it was for the best...but it still hurt. He had finally realized that he was truly alone. It was a realization that made his heart ache and yearn.

He felt so foolish but as he stared at the pretty blonde he found himself wondering what it might be like to lie by her side at night. He shook the thought from his mind knowing he was just an old fool. There was no way a woman like her would ever lie by the side of a man like him.  

Molly spoke up as she stared down at her cheap red plastic watch unaware of Chibs' inner turmoil. "Is there a phone I can use?...I need to get a rental car and I need to call Saint Thomas Hospital and explain why I'm late."

Chibs nodded his head not astonished by her workplace. The scrubs made it obvious, there was only one hospital in Charming. He sighed more sure than ever now that she would never have the time of day for him. She was a responsible adult with an important job who would not be interested in the outlaw biker. Sure, he knew Tara had loved Jax despite her mainstream job, but there was history there. Chibs knew he held no history with Molly. They were from two different worlds. She would not want anything to do with his world. 

"I can have someone give ya a lift to the car rental place. As far as a phone, I'm sure I can sort that out too." Chibs stated as he turned getting the attention of one of the prospects motioning over to the man.

He spoke to Ratboy as the man came up to him. "Can ya take Molly and her boy ere down to Davis Rentals, and let er use yer cell too. She needs to call her work."

Molly widened her eyes a little surprised by the friendly gesture of allowing her to borrow a cell phone.

She spoke hoping that it was clear just how thankful she was for the kind action. "Thank you, Filip. I appreciate it more than you know."

Chibs ignored the look on Ratboy's face as he spoke the smile once again developing along his face. "Yer welcome, Love. Just leave yer number with Ratboy here and We'll get to ya when yer cars ready."

Molly nodded trying not to show how strange she thought that the man who was giving her a ride was called Ratboy. What was it with this place and the employee's nicknames? "Thank you so much."

And with that she let the prospect lead her and her son away to a tow truck.

Chibs watched her walk away cursing the yearning in his heart. He told himself he was an idiot for the feeling. He was trying to bat out of his league and he was too beaten down and worn to even dream that he could charm her. Charming her would be foolish. She was a mother and most likely just saw him as the older dirty mechanic who had been providing good customer service.

Chibs was surprised as Mason turned to face him looking at him through the back window as the tow truck pulled away. Mason did the last thing Chibs' had expected considering the kid's silence. He stared as Mason waved.

Chibs raised his hand waving back without having to even think about the action.

He shook his head as the tow truck faded out of view. He let out a sigh trying to knock Molly and her boy out of his mind.

As lovely as he found Molly, there was no point in daydreaming about her ever giving him the time of day.

A girl like that didn't need a man like him.

[alicelufenia]

Having just reblogged this post, which was my contribution to a "FF14 Hyurs are not like typical fantasy humans" thread, I thought I'd follow up by reflecting on my oc Alice's incarnations both the Main Character Incarnate as a Warrior of Light, and the Main Character But That's a Bad Thing Dark Urge from Baldur's Gate 3, and how they're both reflections of where I'm at in life when they came to be. I'll be getting a little personal and speaking entirely as Kaylin, the person behind this blog, so without further delay, I wanna talk about how these seemingly so dissimilar characters remain one in the same to me.

I created Alice in March of 2021, having been playing ffxiv for a year and a half, and was sitting at end game for a full year. While I had the name since October 2019, my Warrior of Light remained a mostly featureless avatar. She was a Miqo'te, then an au ra, and when I finally decided to make her into a fully realized character, one who could embody the role of Warrior of Light but be unabashedly mine, was when I opted to use the last Fantasia I'd actually pop from that time to the present, to make my max sliders chest and muscles, highlander hyur with fiery red hair, freckles, and the pink and blue heterochromia that would be her signature going forward. I made Dark Knight her canon job, and have not seen the need to change a single thing about her.

She's strong, brave, cocksure and sassy, but found it difficult to connect with people, instead constantly striving to be the larger than life hero the world needed, but feeling empty without more personal and vulnerable connections. Small wonder come Endwalker that Zenos is the one to crack that shell, and she now thinks of herself as an adventurer first, hero a distant second, and finally letting herself get close to people, especially the scions who she has accepted as an extended family.

At this point in my life I was just beginning to pull myself out of a depressive spiral that had been festering for years behind my single-minded devotion to work. I had also been 2 years into my gender transition at this point, which made me feel empowered, but unsure of where to go next. I lost a lot of muscle mass due to hrt, and was afraid to try and build it back. I made Alice tall (taller than irl me), muscular, and trans like me, as if to show myself a woman can be feminine while boasting traditionally masculine features.

While a noble effort, it never really motivated me to buff up. Hell, before the pandemic I was considering joining a local HEMA chapter and learn fencing. After lockdown and starting transitioning, seeing the way trans athletes are crushed into dust and humiliated convinced me never to try. I still mourn the loss of a chapter of my life that could have been, but for which I saw, and still see, no hope.

Out comes a little game called Baldur's Gate 3, and I recast Alice anew, this time as a half wood-elf instead of full human, and a Paladin with Shadow Sorcerer levels; my interpretation at the time of a setting-appropriate Dark Knight in Faerûn. Her story wound up very different from the consistently heroic figure that was her ffxiv predecessor, falling in love with Minthara (directly mirroring my growing attraction to older women), becoming an Oathbreaker, struggling with heroism before retaking her oath in pursuit of her partner's ambitions, performing truly heroic feats, and in the end, following through with seizing that Absolute power. Except not really, cause the evil endings weren't added at the time, so concluding with saving the day with everyone getting their best outcomes for the most part. But next playthrough, I made her Dark Urge, and it was only then I felt her character was truly established, and now worse than before for everyone around her.

It's easy to look at both her 14 and bg3 versions and get the impression that they're nothing alike (their alignments are practically in opposition), and in their narratives you're correct; at the end of the day the Warrior of Light doesn't carry as much baggage as the Dark Urge. So was I just trying to be edgy as possible now?

By the time bg3 released, I was mostly finished with my transition, save one last step that would be the biggest decision of my life. By the time I made Alice into the Dark Urge and make her past the most ugly and self-destructive yet, I was already making plans for gender confirming surgery. It was a decision a long time coming, and that sense of dysphoria over not just your body, but what others allow you to do with it, features prominently in Alice's background now, her struggle against Bhaal being equally about resisting the Urge but also asserting her body autonomy. Unlike me, she doesn't have bottom dysphoria, but Bhaal interfering with her transition by making sure she'll be able to "breed many bhaalspawn" shows that all she's valued for is her birth assigned sex; literally, as she was formed wholecloth by Bhaal in his image, and has faught against that since childhood.

I've recently come home from the hospital, the great work I endeavored this whole year finally coming to a head. I got my operation, and I have never been happier. Even if it's the most pain I've been through in my 41 years, even though I had a real scare that I was going to bleed out, naked in a hospital bed, the remnants of my dysphoria finally managing to kill me after all, I endured because of a large team of nurses and surgeons working like hell, while my wife stayed by my side, and I kept up my smile.

Now ten days out from my surgery (a tenday, you might say :p) I'm home recovering, every day the swelling and bruising grows less, and I'm even experiencing real feeling again as the nerves wake up, and everything feels perfect down there. My world has been transformed via a blood sacrifice (literally, I needed 3 transfusions the first 4 days in the hospital) and one hell of a surgeon.

So, other than sharing this extremely personal story, how does it tie into Alice? For me it's a reminder that every version of her has reflected my current fears and self-doubts; that I'm not feminine enough, or too much of a shut in to make friends, or pining for an athletic achievement I lack the spirit to pursue, and right now the fear of being robbed of my chance to destroy my source of dysphoria in the near future unless I do something about it RIGHT NOW.

Given all I've achieved this year, despite how shit it was on a large scale, it's been one of if not the most important in my life. I'm finally getting closure with my transition, and still with months of recovery ahead.

What I also have now, is loads and loads of time at home doing nothing but resting and maintenance on my new body, and now with far less pain than before.

In short, reflecting on all of this, I'm finally ready to write my bg3 fanfic starring Alice the Dark Urge, her someday wife Minthara, and all the companions who stuck with them along the way. I know plenty of people who've been anticipating this. I'm dearly sorry my friends, but after working on myself, I am ready to fill your dms with wips, and someday sooner than later, a proper release of Glory and Shame, my current working title.

Please look forward to it.

@w-low @elissastillstands @trappedinafantasy37 @majorasnightmare this one's for you cuties, and anyone else who's shown interest but I've forgotten to include cause it's late and I should sleep lol

[bunnylouisegrimes]

Hurt comfort and Soulmates😘

HEY THANK YOU FOR THIS! ❤️❤️❤️ MORE INFODUMPING! 🫂🫂🫂❤️❤️❤️ It makes me so happy that people are interested to hear me ramble because I love hearing others ramble so much, but I'm so afraid that if I do it, I'm being annoying 🥹

(Same ask game as linked last night)

Hurt comfort: If you're feeling bad, what does your F/O do to cheer you up?

Patrick: In the beginning of our relationship, Patrick was admittedly a little cold and didn't know how to react when I was feeling bad. But over time, he slowly began to open up. It was the little gestures that he carries even today, including buying me gifts that slowly developed into having more thought, rubbing my thigh, leaving a kiss on my forehead, and eventually, it became warm, tight hugs and cuddles and more confident and reassuring words. Once he got past being so overstimulated and overwhelmed with physical affection, whenever I'm down, he not only always offers to buy me something but cuddle with me and watch horror movies ♥️

The Polite Leader: This man babies me when I'm feeling bad. He will start brushing his hand through my hair, he will start cooing at me, and he even has a checklist he goes through to make sure all my needs are being met (have I gone to the bathroom today, do I need to drink, do I need to eat, do I need to take a nap, etc). He loves being as close to me as possible and cuddling with me, covering my face in kisses and complimenting me. It's genuinely the most shocking and sweet thing 😢

Soulmates: What made you realize they were perfect partner material?

Patrick: So there's a few posts I've made about Patrick on here as far back as 2021, shortly before I first left and shortly after I discovered him. He showed up in my life at that time through memes of the infamous Walking on Sunshine scene, where he was listening to random music people would edit in as he was walking down the hallway with his Walkman on. I was curious about this mysterious man, so I looked some stuff about him and realized he was the guy from those references I'd see occasionally from other media (the cold apartment design, the Hip To Be Square scene). I read about what he had done, watched clips of the movie, and in my shock, I hated Patrick. And yet, despite his darkness, there was something about him that I still liked, and I didn't understand. I told myself that I loved to hate him. That was all. But as time went on, I realized that this wasn't the case. He knew that it wasn't possible for me to love to hate, only hate to love. Subconsciously, he explained to my mind and heart that we were meant to be because of how lonely we both are on an existential level. Whether he did or did not commit his crimes doesn't matter when we're together because he could start anew in a whole new world with me and escape his Hell. It was his desperation calling out to me that made me melt, then his complexity clicked like a puzzle piece. All of these factors coming together made me realize that we were meant to be, and from that moment onwards and by the time I had finally watched the movie, there was barely any ounce of hate left in my heart, and he became partner material to me 🥺

The Polite Leader: I first met my Polite Leader back in 2013 when The Purge first came out. I had just turned 11 that summer, and other than thinking he was kinda creepy, I was more annoyed with the ad because I was young and was skeptical of the concept. Fast forward ten years later when I remembered the movie, realized it came out a decade ago, remembered that signature face on my TV screen, and decided to do more research on it and him, and realized just how handsome, mysterious, and charming he was despite his creepiness. I actually sat down and bothered to watch the movie, and despite how mid it was, he stole not only the show but my heart as well (I know, cliché lol). He reminded me of a younger Patrick with such eloquent manners and in a dystopian world, and hearing him say the word "exquisite" just sold it for me. Yeah, he's an ass, but he was just 🥲🥲🥲 He was so fine, Rhys Wakefield is such an underrated and sexy Aussie. All of these things led to the moment I realized he was partner material. He may not have had a name or backstory, but we can make him ours in our own way, now can't we? 🥰

[wrengrif]

Are we ready? It's Time...

For more GOOD OMENS WILD META.

I have been chewing on this one for awhile. Like, really ruminating on it. Probably because it's so far-reaching. For me, for others. It's a matter of the Journey From The Final Fifteen.

I will openly admit it, when I first came off the Final Fifteen, sometime in August/September (yeah, I was so worried about Season 2 I didn't watch it for a month after it came out and I realized I was right to do so.). I was, and still am, heartbroken. I was angry, despairing and wondering what the point of an ending like that was. I was angry at Neil Gaiman, I was angry at all the creators behind Good Omens. I was angry at Aziraphale, first, and then after about five minutes, I was angry at Crowley too.

Note, I was never mad at David Tennant or Michael Sheen. I respected their acting choices so much in the Final Fifteen. It was beautiful. It ripped my soul out through my chest. They are both brilliant. I know everyone has their favorite GO counterparts - they are mine.

Then a funny thing happened. A few weeks passed. I started fumbling around Good Omens Tumblr again. I'd been a big contributor during Detroit: Become Human (of which I am still a HUGE FAN, god I love that game.), and until Good Omens 2 came out, I was on the side of Good Omens fandom. Reading, mostly, but at the time I was very deep into my Wangxian fixation (haaaaah, I say, like I have ever left it. My dream AU is Aziraphale and Crowley in the Sunshot Campaign, causing trouble with Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian.). That changed after Final Fifteen. Now I was hurt, I was looking for comfort. I was looking for my fellow fans.

Clearly, I found you, you gorgeous bastards (saying nothing about your moms, unless you want me to). I started to read more meta, started having my own thoughts and carefully posting them. Reading fanfiction, and ... becoming less angry. Stepping back, to really look at the story. I was swallowing content like Aziraphale swallowed ox ribs. In the midst of this, I realized this wasn't The End of Good Omens, but merely the second part of a Trilogy. I'm a writer, I know what the second part of a trilogy is. It's where your heart breaks, it's the cliffhanger episode. I stopped being mad, and started loving the craft. I started to actually look at the scenes instead of just watching.

With that, I started to realize I had been missing so much. I realized I had been wrong, about a lot of things. My perspectives, and thoughts changed. Aziraphale wasn't at fault, he was a victim of the situation as much as Crowley was. Crowley left the bookshop, but he never left Aziraphale. He waited. He's still waiting. As more time passed, the more my thoughts evolved. Changed, formed anew, and I felt better for it. I decided to be hopeful about the whole thing. Yes, it was bad now, but there were enough signs and easter eggs to say this wasn't the ending we were going to get.

I healed, in short. I forgave. I'm waiting for our next chapter, because I know this story isn't done, not by a long shot. I'm waiting to see how our heroes will cope.

Rather like, I think, Aziraphale and Crowley will. The initial pain is going to fade, the anger, the feeling of rejection (whereas they will some day realize neither one of them were in fact, rejected.). The longing is going to kick in. They're going to miss one another more than they will ever be angry. There's going to be moments of grace, of forgiveness, partnered with sadness. What I think we forget, sometimes, is that Aziraphale and Crowley are 6000 years old. They've fought before. They'll fight again. With the fullness of time though, they'll come back to one another. They'll talk again.

Right now though, they've had time. Time to hopefully process (I really, really hope Aziraphale has had SOME time to process), time let the anger fade a little. Maybe not enough time - some of us here still need time - but enough to let them wonder ... is it really over? Maybe to realize, no. No it's not.

Time doesn't heal all wounds, but time does allow you to find equilibrium. I hope time will do the same for our angel and our demon. I know time helped me. I hope time will help us all.

[koco-coko]

When the World Exploded - - Vincent x Jean - Ikemen Vampire Fic

-> His eyepatch was off, and yet the world didn’t end. In fact, it began anew.

Tags/Warnings <--> Angst then Fluff, Lots of Cuddles and Kisses, Soft and Slow, Bad Cooking, Hidden Relationship, Beginning of Relationship, HEAVY SPOILERS for BOTH suitors, Main POV: Jean D'Arc, HEAVY Exploration of Depression, Passive Suicidal Ideation and Religious Guilt.

Word Count: 5,005 (Around 12 pages)!

A/N <--> this originally started as super fluff but boy oh boy I forgot how messed up these two were. Still super fluff but wow I may have gone a little overboard. So please don't force yourself to read this if you're really sensitive to these things, promise I won't be hurt by it <:)

i think they might like this: @azulashengrottospiano @natimiles @weirdwriter69 (lots of interaction with the jean x vincent posts so i thought i'd tag sorry if you didnt want to be)

Jean never expected to be here. Jean didn’t expect to be alive. Jean didn’t expect much of anything, really.

So imagine his surprise to remember that a blonde painter had arms tightly wrapped around his waist and kept drawing him closer into the scent of dry paint and sunflowers, a hint of pancake batter mixed in there, too.

Jean tried to move away, only to have the arm around him tense and pull him further in. A small hum came from the sleeping painter, his head resting on back of Jean's neck. He couldn’t help it when an uncomfortable shudder went through him. His lips were so close to his ear, the beating of his heart right against his back…

Sure, they agreed beforehand but he never expected this. A part of him wanted to escape. It was all too much, too new. Yet Vincent wouldn’t let him get away, and maybe that was for the better. Despite the blank face and cold demeanor, he was sensitive to many, many things. A case of touch-starvation didn’t help the fact. After a momentary inner conflict, Jean let out a deep sigh and dug his face into the pillow beside him. He could do it. He fell asleep like this once tonight, he could do it again.

He came to learn that there were a lot of firsts when being revived as a vampire.

It was the first time he ever felt attracted to someone, let alone a man.

It was only when Vincent started painting outside more often that Jean started feeling… things. Tingles in his stomach whenever he saw the man paint a dark night sky with swirls of light. Shakes when he caught glimpses of a notebook filled with anatomy practice and fencing positions, all suspiciously bearing a resemblance to Jean. It could be argued that a few were Napoleon, though. The lines were messy enough. These sensations started following him around the mansion, too. At the dinner table, he always felt lighter when he heard Vincent giggle at something Arthur said. Eventually, a simple greeting smile sent a shiver through the poor soldier’s body and all he could do was scuttle off into the piano room. 

Vincent was too radiant for a sinner to handle, he deduced. It seemed logical at the time. Jean’s chest was always empty and Vincent always had light to bring to someone. The world was a better place with Vincent in it and it was worse with Jean. That was just how things were. Jean was ready to accept that over… Well…

“Can I paint you?”

It was the first time anyone ever asked… that. Jean had been avoiding Vincent, more than usual, but one late night out of his room for a bottle of Rouge led to them meeting again. Vincent was already coated in paint, perhaps from a late night project, filling one of his paint cups with fresher water.

Jean was a frozen statue for a while, but when Vincent’s smile slowly faded, he suddenly came to. “Why me?” he asked, quietly.

Vincent looked to the side, the enthusiasm of the initial question trailing off. “I’ve never seen anyone like you?”

So unclean, full of sin and guilt?

“So… pretty?” 

Jean shifted on his feet uncomfortably, staring at the painter in front of him with wide eyes.

Vincent was quick to catch his mistake. “In a manly way! Very male-orientated. But beautiful and elegant, too! So, um, beautifully handsome? Does that make sense?”

Not at all. Jean felt his entire mind and body shut down, then come back, then shut down again. 

Beautiful? Handsome? Was this some sick joke?

“You didn’t drink that, did you?” Jean asked, shyly pointing to the paint-stained cup in his hands.

Vincent glanced down at it, then backed up. “No, I don’t believe so,” he almost chuckled, “Why would you think that?”

“You don’t seem in your right mind,” he responded. “I’m none of what you have described me as. I would suggest getting your eyes checked in the near future.” Jean turned to make his exit, bottle of Rouge in hand.

Vincent’s lips went ajar, blinking in disbelief. Then, he laughed. Jean froze. It was almost insulting to hear that. “Well, I don’t think so. I don’t know you too well, sure, but you seem nice.”

Those words sent butterflies through him.

Whenever Jean looked in the mirror, all he saw was a husk of a living being. He couldn’t say human anymore. He was ugly, inside and out. He longed for life, for warmth, comfort, yet every time it faced him, he ran away. God put him on this Earth to suffer in an endless cycle, yet he couldn’t break his piety to such a cruel deity. 

It was something he’d slowly started to accept– the emptiness was a part of his life. If death came to face him, like a fool, he’d fight it, only to realize that victory meant waking up to another day, only after the fact.

Then, an angel descended upon him. It smiled with bright light, with hair as gold as a halo and beamed at him with kind, blue eyes.

“I guess I’ll just ask again,” the angel asked, “Can I paint you sometime?”

Who was he, a mortal man with sins too heavy to weigh, to deny the messenger of God?

It was the first time he ever ‘modeled’ for someone. 

He never stopped by Vincent’s room for the specific purpose of sitting in a chair for hours on end (when they did try, it was so unpleasant that Jean almost fainted), but he visited on occasion.

Instead of modeling, Vincent would simply follow Jean around at random times with a sketchbook in hand, capturing moments of life in a still, pencil-drawn image. At the end of the day, when the stars twinkled in through Vincent’s window, Jean was invited in and the two chatted about the scenes the blonde had drawn.

“That’s not me,” Jean would say each time, “That man is too pure to be me.”

And every time, Vincent would shake his head and chuckle. “You should really start being nicer to yourself.” Vincent would then quietly whisper to himself, “Rich, coming from me of all people, but the advice still stands.” 

Jean never tried to respond to his extra comments, until one late evening– “Perhaps we both should.”

Vincent’s expression was unreadable as he silently flipped to the next page.

It was the first time someone tried to cook for him. Keyword: tried.

Everyone in the mansion began to notice that the most polar opposites of the mansion had so suddenly gravitated toward each other. Napoleon was surprised when Vincent first appeared at their sparring matches as a regular guest, but now? Why, now he was surprised not to greet him.

Mozart was the most confused, of course. A soldier and a painter? Really, what would they ever want to do with each other? Jean was such a recluse, too. What did Vincent say to him that made him stray from his hideaway room and weapons shop? Theodorus seemed to share this sentiment, trailing behind his older brother like a guard dog.

Still, it didn’t surprise anyone when Vincent wanted to make something for Jean’s birthday.

It did surprise Sebastian that same morning to find the kitchen in shambles. Vincent stood in the middle of it all, a fire blazing inside the oven. Apparently, he had tried to make a batch of macarons. 

It took the help of half the mansion to salvage what they could. When Jean was presented with burnt yet somehow undercooked macarons, he just… stared at them.

“How did you know I liked these?” he asked, trying to ignore the smoke coming from the kitchen area.

Vincent’s smile was drenched in embarrassment. “Ah, well, whenever we go to your shop together, I always see you looking at the macarons in the window displays. So, I just assumed you liked them. Glad you do! I would’ve looked silly if not…”

“Thank you.” Jean practically cut him off before he could say anything else. To show his gratitude, he took one from the pan and tossed it in his mouth. Vincent cringed.

The soldier’s eyes burst open with shock. It was so… mushy and crunchy and… How in God’s name could something like this even be created? It was a crime against pastries everywhere. 

“Sorry,” Vincent mumbled, “I’m not really a sweet’s fan, so…”

That was all it took to convince Jean to push through, swallowing the macaron (could you even call it that?) with much strain. 

“Don’t be. It’s the thought that matters,” Jean said, taking the tray from Vincent. “I… I’ll cherish this forever.”

Jean was looking down at the floor shyly, but he swore he saw a pink color grow on Vincent’s cheeks.

Later that night, he found a portrait of himself waiting by his door. In his critical eyes, it was too divine to look anything like him, but the distinctive stroke style made Vincent the clear painter. A note was attached to the bottom, reading:

“Happy birthday! Sorry for the macarons this morning. Maybe after you close your shop tomorrow, we can go to a bakery and get some non-burnt ones! We could bring them home for a tea party, if you’d like!

Also, I think I finally had enough sketches of you to make a painting, so here’s the finished thing! I hope you like it. I’d like to make more, if you’re comfortable with that

– Vincent Van Gogh”

Unfortunately, Jean wasn’t the most literate. He enjoyed the fact that with paintings, written words were unnecessary. It was a walk of shame to bring the note to Mozart so he could read it for him.

It didn’t completely miss him, though, despite his usual density. Vincent wanted to paint him more. An invitation for more time spent together.

When the fact hit him, Mozart had to double-take the smile he saw on his friend’s face.

It was the first time he ever kissed someone. 

Now, granted, he didn’t remember that until the next morning’s hangover passed. 

Jean was known to be insanely lightweight, so why he was given a glass of wine- no one knows. Unfortunately, his drunkenness often made him very… touchy. So when the mansion had a banquet drawn long into the night, Jean was practically laying on top of Vincent (much to Theo’s ire).

So, Vincent offered to bring Jean back to his room. His strength was only one factor in it, but Jean’s touchy-feely state made it a slight struggle to bring him into the room without losing his balance and being blinded by Jean’s clinginess. 

Vincent has an arm wrapped around Jean as they make their way into his empty room. “Jeanie!” Vincent yelped, “I’m trying to put you to bed!” Through his struggle, he was laughing. Drunken Jean thought it was the most adorable thing in the world. It also didn’t help that Vincent was feeling a bit tipsy, too. He couldn’t stop himself from giggling at the absurdity of Jean’s actions even when he was worried for him.

When Vincent finally managed to get Jean into his room without tripping over his feet for a fourth time, he was content to call it a night. Unfortunately, Jean did not. He latched onto his arm and wouldn’t let go. 

“Wait,” he whispered in a hoarse voice, “Please stay.”

Vincent couldn’t tell if it was the wine getting to him or not, but something made his cheeks grow red.

It was hard to remember the rest. Vincent tried to coax Jean into bed, but he refused, instead wrapping his arms around Vincent and locking him in an embrace.

It was a stupored dance, rocking back and forth as the painter tried to keep the soldier on his feet and not knock the two of them over. Not that he minded, though. The closeness was… oddly welcome.

“C’mon, Theo is going to worry if I don’t go back soon! I promise we’ll see each other tomorrow!” Vincent said, taking steps towards Jean’s bed.

Jean pulled back against him, his head leaning on Vincent’s chest. “But I want you here now.” 

How could the pure angel say no to such a shy request? It’d break poor Jeanie’s heart to force him off!

The swaying continued, Jean moving closer and closer, until…

What was it Arthur said? ‘Drunken words were sober thoughts?’ Did that translate to actions, too? 

The mens’ lips met, for just a brief second, but long enough for Vincent’s to turn into a living cherry. 

They stared at each other for a moment, lust and liquor made Jean’s gaze cloudy, just as it fogged his mind. Vincent was more aware, but maybe he was hazy, too. 

Jean went in again, losing all semblance of balance, leaning all his weight onto Vincent as his knees bent and only the tips of his toes remained dragging on the ground.

If he was a sinner, so be it. He couldn’t take it anymore– the strange pulses of his heart whenever Vincent smiled in the sunlight or told him he was beautiful. He was looked down upon by Heaven’s eye, so what was the point in searching for salvation any longer?

The devil named ethanol overtook Jean, but maybe it claimed Vincent’s heart, too. He didn’t even stumble, catching Jean’s weight and slowly easing into the second kiss. And the fourth. And the seventh.

When the eleventh finished, Vincent suddenly gained consciousness again and forced Jean into bed, running off soon after. Jean was too drunk by then and passed out before he could realize what he’d done.

When day broke the next day, Jean was alone in his bed. No memory came to him until 10 A.M. 

What in God’s name had he done!? What sweet temptation overcame him? He was never drinking again, surely! His heart beat out of his chest with images and sensations flashed by him. With Vincent? He had stooped so low as to share affections with a man!? An innocent one, at that! He couldn’t believe he had even dared to touch the painting angel, tainting him with fault and impurity. God almighty, damnation was all he would receive. He’d turned his back to God thousands of times, but this had to be it. The Holy Spirit would claim him at any moment, banishing him to the pits of hell. Forgiveness was fully out of reach. Why did he have to be revived? He should’ve suffered on that stake, right where he belonged.

Jean locked himself in his room for weeks, only answering when Mozart came to drop off a bottle of Rouge. The pianist would try to speak, only for the door to be slammed in his face. The few glimpses residents did catch of him weren’t all too uplifting, either: Jean, knelt over his bedside with a rosary, muttering the Hail Mary over and over as if he would face judgment at any second. He only left to go to the weapons shop. Jean would avoid Vincent like the plague, or in his case, a harsh blaze. 

Vincent didn’t fare much better. He was more shy and nervous around the mansion, his paintings became more chaotic and surreal. He tried to ignore it, push down every bit of emotion that started to rise in his chest, but… the unfinished paintings spoke for themselves. Lilly fields, the brandish of a sword, a fire burning sweetly in a fool’s chest.

Vincent felt his hands shake when he flipped through his sketchbook, only to find the same thoughts circling him. His chest felt like it would explode. He didn’t think anything of it when they first grew close to each other, but things were different now.

It was the first time anyone ever told him that.

“I think I’m in love with you.”

The sword fell from his hands with a loud clatter. Jean was a statue in the middle of the weapons shop while Vincent stood by the door, his hand on the knob.

The store was closed, but Vincent had been gifted a key a while ago. Vincent brightened any room he stepped in with such a radiant light that Jean felt blinded by it. Except… Even with the sunset behind him, illuminating him like an angel, Vincent appeared to him as a normal man.

He was impure, too. He sinned. He felt. Vincent wasn’t a big fan of that last one. 

“You’re mistaken, monsieur.” Jean’s words cut like a sword; through the air and through Vincent’s heart. Vincent clutched his chest. “Whatever… this… is, it is not love. Lucifer is tempting us. We must not give in.” Jean picked the blade from the floor and placed it back on the rack, his brows knit. He kept his back turned to Vincent. He couldn’t even stand to look at him anymore. He was trying to resist the call of lust, after all. “There is nothing to love about me. Do not let the devil fool you, Vincent.”

Vincent’s head was filled with new feelings, but he knew this one too well: Hurt. It felt like Jean had just struck him in the heart with no remorse. Jean had always been blunt, a bit cold and dense, but this was cruel! Vincent’s fingers curled in, his fingernails stabbing the palm of his hand.

“Why not?” Vincent demanded. Jean wasn’t used to a harsh tone from the painter. “I-I…” Vincent practically trembled as he tried to force the words out. “Why do you get to decide what I’m feeling?”

Jean swallowed hard. He… He never thought of it like that. God was the only judge, why was he deciding for the painter? He opened his mouth to speak, but Vincent cut him off as he stepped closer.

“I love you, Jean. And, sure, maybe I don’t have the best grasp on feelings yet, but I know I love you.” Vincent’s declaration was made and there was no going back. It was a bit scary, pouring the beatings of his heart in front of Jean, but it had to be done. “You’re not going to convince me I don’t. I’m sorry.”

Jean was… silent. His violet eyes were wide, but there were unreadable emotions going through him. Vincent couldn’t bring himself to gaze at Jean for more than a few seconds. Not yet. He had no idea how the soldier would react. He was always so cynical, so shrouded in mystery, but that only made Vincent want to show him the sun even more.

“Why?” Jean parroted Vincent’s previous question. “What is there to love about me?” His voice cracked. As much as he tried to hide it, tears were being forcibly choked and swallowed to save his pride.

Vincent’s shoulders slowly slumped as the tension melted. Oh, what wasn’t there to admire. “Well… You’re strong.”

No I’m not, his mind argued.

“And you’re very kind. You’re always so thoughtful and thinking of others.”

It can’t be true.

“I can only dream to be as selfless as you, really!”

That was a blatant lie. What kind of game was he pulling? Only then did Jean’s thoughts stray. Vincent would never lie so openly. Was there truth in his words?

“I like spending time with you, too. You’ve always got something fun to say, when you do talk. And I like it when we go places. You keep talking about that field of lilies, so I think we could go there next!”

His mind’s voice couldn’t think up a retort in time.

“And… Well, I said it when we first met, right? You’re beautifully handsome. That’s something to enjoy, too,” Vincent giggled nervously, “Not as much as the other things, though! More of an added bonus.”

Vincent peeled his eyes off the floor to meet with an unseemly sight. Saint Jeanne D’Arc, staring him right in the face, with a hand over his mouth and tears rolling down his cheeks. It was sacrilegious to watch.

“Hey, don’t cry, Jeanie,” Vincent whispered, moving right in front of Jean to wipe his tears with his thumb. His hand lingered on the man’s cheek. 

Jean felt as if he couldn’t breathe right away. Love? Nonsense. It wasn’t for him. He wasn’t even supposed to be alive! How could someone so gentle and considerate say all those things about him? This had to be some sort of trick or illusion. A dream, even.

Jean’s fingers intertwined with Vincent’s, not letting the painter’s delicate hands leave his face anytime soon.

He was just waiting to wake up from this dream. Waiting patiently. Waiting… and waiting.

It never came.

When he opened his eyes, Vincent was still there, sky blue eyes lovingly locked on him. 

Vincent’s smile was soft. Anything harsher would blind Jean. “We’re vampires, Jean. I think God has bigger things to worry about. Maybe he can let this one slide.”

It was overwhelming to be blanketed in the holy light and Jean’s tears kept falling. This time, with a shy smile on his face.

It happened naturally. The gap between their faces drew shorter and shorter, their bodies fit together perfectly, and Jean’s hands felt comfortable on Vincent’s waist.

It was reserved, at first. Neither had any idea how to navigate a kiss with the other, but it was more natural than Jean had expected. It was… warm. Vincent’s thumb ran his across Jean’s eyepatch. Involuntarily, he drew back. They both used that as a minute to breathe.

Surprisingly, Jean was the one who initiated the second kiss, and this one was much more passionate. Their tongues collided on this one, messily and sloppily. Neither had any clue how to do this, but that was part of the enjoyment. It was slow, sensual, simply taking their time to explore each other. 

It wasn’t perfect, but it didn’t have to be. Jean and Vincent backed away from each other entirely content, their foreheads pressing against the other. A dopey grin enveloped the soldier’s red face. He was certain the blonde could hear just how loudly his heart pumped in his chest.

It was the first time he felt so happy.

The days at the mansion were almost tolerable now. When no one was around, a chaste peck on the cheek or forehead would be shared. Usually Vincent was the one to find Jean alone in the library, but occasionally Jean walked by his room and left a kiss on his cheek. 

Theo and Mozart noticed how they would disappear together first. Soon enough, everyone else caught on. Most of the mansion went to Arthur and Sebastian for answers, but both refused to tell. Sebastian out of not wanting to admit the amount of intel stored in his Oh no– They Didn’t! journal, and Arthur because he thought it’d be more fun for everyone else to figure it out themselves. Being the detective he was, Vincent sighed in relief when he heard he hadn’t told anyone. These feelings, this relationship… It’s all so new and they needed to take it slow. Being outed so soon would only spell disaster, especially in this century. Besides, Jean was already suffering from the judgmental stares from his little brother across the dinner table.

So, for the meantime, tea parties were kept in lonesome meadows and their most intimate moments were behind locked doors.

It was the first time he had a picnic. 

They promised to go to the lily field, when they had the chance. Vincent was captivated the moment he saw a sea of white petals blowing in the wind, glowing under the light of the moon. Jean didn’t interrupt his pause, allowing him to absorb the beauty around him. 

A blanket placed under them, a stiff breeze moving Vincent’s blonde curls in such a way that Jean couldn’t tear his eyes away. His head rested on the painter’s thigh while he sketched the field in front of them, grinning as his mind’s eye was put to paper. 

He looked down at Jean, breathing softly as he admired him. Vincent chuckled as he ran his fingers through his partner’s navy hair. “This is nice,” he whispered, not wanting to interrupt the still of the night.

The moonlight hit Vincent in such a way that he looked as if he descended from heaven, his features chiseled by God himself. “It is,” Jean responded, closing his eyes to properly enjoy the sensation. 

“We’re really lovers, aren’t we?” the blonde vampire asked softly. “It’s hard to imagine it in the mansion, but here… It feels real.” A pause hit Vincent before he continued, a romantic sigh leaving his lips as he took the moment in. “We should go see the sunflowers next.”

Jean’s eyes fluttered open and he watched Vincent attentively. There was a distinct longing in his eyes as he stared over the waves of flowers.

He couldn’t help himself. Jean cupped Vincent’s cheek in his head, bending awkwardly to plant a kiss on his lover’s jaw.

It was the first time he said those three words.

“I love you.”

It was the first time he took his eyepatch off in front of someone.

It had taken a full year for Jean to open up to the idea of taking his eyepatch off in front of Vincent. When they said they were taking it slow, they meant slow. Molasses envied them. They both had a lot of issues within themself, so moving too fast would only cause even more problems. This was far more safe and comfortable, and for them, that mattered more than anything.

It was a planned event. Theodorus wouldn’t be home for a few days on a business trip and Mozart was completely overtaken by a burst of creativity. Melodies filled the air each night, perfect for the inexperienced lovers. The stars had aligned for them to finally have a chance to sleep together and maybe sleep in, if they were lucky. 

Sitting on opposite ends of Jean’s mattress, Vincent observed the empty room around him with slight dismay. The many paintings gifted to his lover were the only decorations on the walls. Otherwise, the place looked like a jail cell. At least Vincent's cell had a nice window and some paint stains on the floor. This was a topic for another day, though. 

Jean sheepishly cleared his throat. A fabric eyepatch sling was laid across his open palm, extending it out for Vincent to take. He feared if he held it any longer that he’d put it right back on. 

Vincent was instantly enamored with Jean’s face. He came to know of Jean’s execution, of how he covered himself so thoroughly to hide the scars that coated him from his feet to his face, but finally being able to see some, the dead skin surrounding his blind eye and the burns that brushed his usually glove-covered hands… He was so beautiful. 

Jean was self-conscious under his gaze, actively forcing his left hand not to cover his eye. Fortunately, Vincent reached out and traced the burnt lines of his face before Jean could. His breath hitched, a short quivering running down his shoulder. “Sorry,” Vincent mumbled, now caressing the side of his face. “I just… I should paint you like this sometime. If you’ll let me.” Briefly, Vincent’s eyes wandered to his torso, before gazing back at the head of his lover. He held his cheek so tenderly.

Jean’s bashfulness melted under the tender gaze of the older Van Gogh. He took his wrist in his hand and planted delicate kisses against his palm. Vincent giggled coyly. Ah, that sound was more beautiful than any hymns the angels could conjure up. “I’ll think about it, monsieur.” He was thankful the attention to his scars ended there, although slight brushes and kisses against his eye were common as they laid next to each other. Any comments on its state would’ve left Jean a mess of regret and self-hatred. Vincent was careful about that, as Jean was with Vincent’s emotional status. It was an equal trade.

The evening was quiet, lulling the two to sleep easily. At first, they had fallen asleep with their hands locked together, not all too close to each other. Vincent knew just how overwhelming physical affection was for Jean, even after a full year in this relationship. Jean was the one who set the pace when it came to touch. He didn’t mind that. 

Apparently, his unconscious state did. Jean awoke in the middle of the night to Vincent’s head tucked against his neck, arms around his waist and his back pressed against the painter’s chest, their fingers still intertwined with each other. His face dug against the pillow under him, hiding the scar from the dark nighttime. 

Sometimes, he could feel the eyes of God staring at him, judging him for every sin he’d committed. When that happened, he’d spend several days in the city church, ultimately failing to build up the courage to enter the confessional. He was sin incarnate, no Father could offer repentance for that. 

The urge to run overcame him. To be so close to another living being was too much… but the scent of paint and sunflowers granted miracles to Jean. His muscles slowly unwound and he found himself falling into the arms of rest once again. The strong arms around him kept him tied to reality and away from the dark thoughts of his wandering mind. 

Every time Jean fell asleep, he dreaded the coming morning. The cycle of a torturous, unwanted, wrongful existence continued. 

But with Vincent here… Things were different. A small flicker grew in his heart. If he could make it to tomorrow, he’d get to see Vincent smile. Oh, and perhaps he’d get to spare with Napoleon, and then play with Cherie… then he could… And then...

Suddenly everything felt worth fighting for, if only for a day.

He had taken his eyepatch off, and the world still turned.

[karniss-bg3]

Now this is just a pure theory but I'm wondering what you think of it. It was actually what you wrote that helped me think about this. There is a book in General Thorm's room called Attractive Drow Exiles. And it talks about the plan used to drag in unwilling Drow members by using a man (presumably a Drow) called Xilvre (sounds like Silver) to go down and stir up some trouble. He was described as very loyal but annoyingly enthusiastic. If this was Kar'niss before he was changed, it does answer a lot of questions. The book says he was probably killed, but the book was written before the event took place. It would make more sense that the Drow would punish Xilvre by changing him into a Drider for going against his kind and Lolth. And it shattered his mind in the process. And when he came back, they gave him the task with the lantern.

This is an interesting point you bring up. I was first alerted to the existence of that book by an anonymous ask and @novarex who made a post about it here. After I read it I asked myself "Who was Xilvre?". I didn't delve into it deeper than that at the time but this could be a lead.

The first thing to note is this book lists Xilvre as "True Soul 113". The definition of a True Soul according to the wiki is as follows:

True Souls are Followers of the Absolute who have been infected with an Illithid tadpole that grants them psionic powers similar to the player. They serve as commanding members of the Absolute's army. True Souls almost always have a Mind Flayer Parasite Specimen that can be looted from their bodies if killed.

When Kar'niss dies he doesn't have a parasite on his body that can be looted, nor is there evidence that he is in charge of any army within Moonrise. He acts as a guide but beyond that he follows commands more than I'd say he gives them. On the list of True Souls in Act 2, Kar'niss isn't listed as being one. When he first meets the player he does acknowledge that they are a True Soul, but he never suggests that he is one also, or that they have common ground in that regard.

The counter argument I'd make is the definition of True Soul says "almost always" when it comes to mind flayer parasites that can be looted. This leaves room for doubt that even though he doesn't have a parasite the player can take, it doesn't mean he is without one as a whole. Furthermore, certain dialogue trees and failed DC checks insinuate that Kar'niss can tap into and read the players mind, suggesting some sort of psionic link; Thus, a tadpole being present.

This leaves his status a bit open ended. If Kar'niss is Xilvre, perhaps he was titled as a True Soul to start. The drow captured him for being a heretic and turned him into a drider. When he slinked back to Moonrise he was demoted as a True Soul and given the job as a guide as his transformation made his mind too broken to be useful. He or someone else changed his name and he started life anew.

The one glaring issue I see is that if the drow, or Lolth, discovered that one of their own was planning to not only turn against the spider queen but also sabotage their very way of life, I don't think he would've gotten off as easy as he did. Betrayal of that magnitude would be a death sentence and it's likely why Ketheric foresaw Xilvre's demise. I can't imagine if Lolth saw a threat to her domain she wouldn't lash out to the fullest against any who supported the notion. Driders are made as a result of failure, weakness or displeasure. What Xilvre was tasked to do dwarfs all three. Xilvre would make an excellent example to those who turned against Lolth and no doubt his end would've been a messy one. There is a chance he could've been spared but it'd be an unusual mercy.

What I think could be more likely is that Kar'niss was part of the warband lured out by Xilvre's antics. Driders are known to work with and fight alongside other drow despite how thin the trust can be. He was ambushed alongside the others and dragged in to become part of the Absolute's forces. Either that or he overheard what Xilvre had done or said and curiosity led him out of the Underdark in search of a new Goddess to follow, perhaps a cure for his affliction.

It's all good theorycrafting fun. There is some overlap between Kar'niss and Xilvre. Even the name sounds like something that could fit Kar'niss with the pronunciation of "silver". That and the description of being a "tedious enthusiast" does describe Kar'niss fairly well, at least how we know him now. It'd be quite the plot twist if true!

Thanks for the ask!

[friends-to-lovers-tournament]

Friends to Lovers Tournament: Round 3, Side A, Match 4

propaganda under the cut!

Junnana:

Oh they are so very silly and I adore them. They basically spent the anime being the most married couple there, the game amplifying that and the movie burning that all to the ground (or Nana did that) before vowing to start a new later. They're just a girl reaching for her dreams without a ton of natural talent and a girl who enjoys helping her friends shine instead of herself despite being super skilled but even though they have slightly different goals on the stage they both respect each other so very much to the point where things only go wrong in the movie because Nana lost a bit of the respect for Junna that was always so fundamental in their dynamic. The Overture manga gives a bit of insight into what their early interactions were like especially in their respective focus chapters (3 and 9), with 3 showing that Nana was planning on becoming their class president rather than Junna but stepped down just because she had so much trust in her abilities while still making it clear that Junna could rely on her while in 9 the mutual reliance came back in the form of Junna being the one to make Nana realize she wasn't alone. Carrying onwards to the anime, some time before the whole thing, Nana decided "hey time loops are pretty cool" because she was afraid of her and her friends growing up and separating. This was not a fact known by anybody but her and that one giraffe and did not affect the early plot, where for the most part Junna was more focused on due to her struggles being highlighted from the moment revues were introduced and Nana was just constantly around her. Then Junna ended up being the first person Nana actually told about them directly (and not in a very vague way in a revue because otherwise Hikari would be the first) because it was looking like said loops were about to end because the childhood friends to lovers dynamic as a whole decided to say nuh uh to her. Then she did in fact lose her next revue which made the idea of continuing her repetitions a little impossible but Junna ended up recovering from that whole shock pretty quickly, and went to comfort Nana and help her learn to start anew. 

Then there's the game which. yeah there's so much stuff in there that I can't even explain it all. In the main story we get the arc of Nana starting her overprotective bs once again, getting stopped and then being given more courage to move forward by Junna since she was realizing that she kind of messed up (since she decided to object to the concept of plays just having lead actors in general. as you do), but there's so much stuff outside of the main story. Highlights include: Junnana literally making up their own ship name, Nana deciding the best way to practice for a role centered around an observant character was to observe Junna specifically, Nana writing a self-indulgent Phantom of the Opera adaptation with herself as the Phantom and Junna as Christine in an event where it turned out she relates to the Phantom (red flag #1 as far as I'm concerned) and wrote Christine based on Junna (Junna was very okay with this but I find it hilarious that she made her adaption of a famous play basically self insert fanfiction), the actual Junnana kiss (stage kiss?? real kiss?? we'll never know), the Valentine's Day event where Junna kept saying things like "oh I'd go to any lengths for Nana" while talking about making chocolate of all things, the time Junna talked about how she wouldn't let anybody take her place of staying right by Nana's side if she had to because she loves being there completely out of the blue to Nana's ex of all people (not a canon ex but a lot of people who know about her whole deal with Nana at least agree that they had something going on. and let me tell you Junna telling the person who constantly regrets not having the strength to remain by Nana's side how much she loved being with Nana was not a smart choice, even though Hisame, the girl in question, took it very well), the Steins;Gate collab where a good chunk of the plot is just Junna being worried about Nana, a play where it turned out that the whole time Junna and Nana had both taken inspiration from each other for their roles, the time they had to actively stop themselves during separate interviews from just rambling about each other, etc. There's so much. Also I forgot to mention it during the main story part but there's also an alternate universe briefly discussed where one of their friends just does not exist so Nana is one of the two best actors in the class and gets the lead role in the play they perform every year, and there's a scene after their performance where Junna talks about how, in the play which is a tragedy involving two lesbians in love, Nana's performance made her think that, if she had stood as her co-star, she would have simply been built different and prevented the tragedy from happening. The plot ends with one character falling form a tower and another being imprisoned within it, and Junna is like "if I was this tragedy and I was with you I would have simply taken your character's hand and never let her go". They're just so married in the game and I can't believe them for it

And then there's the movie. We don't talk about the movie but I kind of have to. Okay so you remember those two friends I was talking about who act very married and ultimately have a lot of their relationship based around their mutual respect for each other? What if Nana stopped respecting Junna entirely one day? That's their movie arc. This movie covers the girls "dying" as stage girls (ie. losing what made them true stage girls/actors in the first place) and then being "reborn" as them, and unfortunately Nana is of the opinion that Junna could just simply have her symbolism death and not the other part. During their revue, Nana talks a lot about how beautiful and dazzling (using those exact words. she even called Junna heartbreakingly beautiful in the dub) Junna was when she was foolishly reaching for a role she wasn't likely to get, but put it all in past tense, and encouraged Junna to let herself die as a stage girl in a brilliant manor rather than trying and failing to grasp her brilliance and dying out like that. also she called her an ugly fruit which sure is something. Then Junna was like "???? no I won't do that actually???" and took one of Nana's swords from her to engage in a sword fight since Nana had destroyed her usual weapon. Which was not a great matchup briefly because Junna never used a sword in her life but after Nana realized that the Junna she was fighting was different from the Junna she knew, and didn't match the role she had assigned for her, Junna ended up telling Nana that her own role was something she'd define for herself and not something Nana could assign for her, and ended up winning against her. After the revue was over, Junna still wanted Nana in her life, and promised her that, one day, they'd reunite on a stage which belonged to both of them, even though they had to find their own stages before that could happen. Before they departed, Nana lamented that Junna was dazzling, contradicting her previous belief that she was only dazzling in the past, all while beginning to cry, and Junna nearly turned around to comfort her, but ultimately decided to continue onto her next stage as Nana carried onwards to her own, knowing that they would both need to grow before their reunion. I also want to mention that, during this scene, a picture of the two of them, one which Nana had stabbed through the middle as she was telling Junna how dazzling she thought she once was, had since been moved to a little pond in the background of the scene (and of the background of the start of the whole revue, so it was there the whole time) that was nearly identical to the one where Junna and Nana had had their moment of comfort at the end of episode 9 of the anime. With the middle of the picture being soaked in water, it ended up sinking just enough for the new cut in the middle of the picture to appear almost mended, showing that, while the damage Nana had done and the rift between them was still there, it was already starting to mend as they once again regarded each other as equals. This scene lives in my head constantly and haunts me daily. Congratulations to Junnana for having a divorce arc as high schoolers

Soriku:

Ultimate friends to lovers. They've been best friends since childhood but as they start to grow up, those feelings change into a more romantic nature but neither handles this well. Riku in particular has a whole villain arc about it bc his insecurities about the situation get the better of him, meanwhile Sora isn't self aware enough to recognize his feelings are romantic in nature but he spends all of his time desperately trying to get Riku back so they can be together again. Ultimately even after they come together, their love continues to be a main driving force of the narrative and it's so palpable

[blueberrypancakesworld]

A lot of drugs and no words

Doflamingo x Crocodile

warning : doing cocaine, smoking, alcohol, mentioning of sex , implied darker themes , kissing, some blood

Summary : Drugs. One with nicotine, the other with cocaine. Two men who rule an empire but at the end of the day are not only bound to their addictions but also to each other.

Info : So it took longer than expected till I write again for the amazing @pocketwei the one-shot is inspired by THIS amazing beautiful art. Check out her blog and have fun reading everyone :)

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Two kings. Two kings in their own way, trapped in a world they had long since given up trying to escape. At some point in their youth, they had started looking for something that would take away their feelings, their gnawing, their pain, their insecurity and their lives for a few moments.

The one in the heat of Alabastia, running a company and taking over an entire country, eventually got on his nerves, on the nerves that could only ever hold out as much as he could.

The sun sometimes made him crazy, he swore he started to see that bastard, that grin that haunted him like a fatamorgan when he didn't reach for the nicotine, that sometimes wooden, sometimes leathery smell of the cigar. Inhaling the nicotine it took to make him forget for a moment to calm down. To get his nerves back in order to organize his thoughts as best he could until it started all over again.

To rule this city anew every day until he would meet him again, the two of them, the man who would not let him go. The one who wouldn't let him go at the execution, when the two of them had not only united for the first time but had also shed blood.

The look at his golden hook confirmed this again and again and every time he looked into the grinning face he knew how vulnerable the King of Dressrosa really was.

A boy, a spoiled boy with a trauma, a brother and a lack of moral standards when it came to sex. But maybe that was what made him so attractive Crocodile never knew for sure but as he let the smoke escape from between his lips and looked at the letter between his ringed fingers he knew that another meeting was not only inevitable but imminent.

But he would take care of that when he had smoked the cigar to the last shred. His blond angel would have to wait until the nicotine had completely taken hold of him.

Before he dissolved in the sand and took the embers of the burnt cigar with him, knowing that when he reformed he would meet the two fallen kings.

To his amusement, the first thing he heard was the almost disinterested tone of the made-up man. ,,The junkie is in the room...I'd be a little careful," he heard the voice of Corazon, who was prevented from continuing down the hallway of the annex with the appearance of the King of Alabastia.

Crocodile had only an almost pitying smile for him, knowing what the two brothers were doing Corazon was a substitute for him until the crocodile would approach the bird himself.

Before he passed the blond, he let his hand wander over the younger one's cheek and saw the blow that was rewarded with a kiss afterwards, the lipstick still visible. The two would never learn, but at the end of the day it wasn't Crocodile who would come between them and his past.

He was only here for one of them and that should be enough. Unheeding, he continued down the corridors until he came to the door behind which the blond would be. He went in without knocking, knowing that Doflamingo would be waiting for him anyway.

,,Well, if it isn't for my-well, you must always have that smell on you!" the blond interrupted himself, looking up from his Wine glass and already preparing himself for a charge of white powder. ,,Do you always have to make that noise?" Crocodile dagged, closing his eyes in annoyance for a moment as the snorting noise could be heard. The blond leaned over to pull the drug from his table, disregarding his lover who pulled out another cigar in return.

He held the lighter underneath and began to smoke his cigar, which he knew the blond hated. But what did it matter, they both hated each other in one way or another. ,,Then stop burning your lungs...besides, we both know why you're here," mumbled Dofi, leaning back against the couch and forgetting his surroundings for a moment.

The twist of drugs, one seeking redemption, the other peace and quiet. Crocodile ignored the words and made his way to the couch and stood between him and the table with the drugs. He and Corazon were part of the wall that kept the blond from killing himself.

Because even if his lungs gave up at some point, they would all give up and die at some point, but that would still take time and so they still had enough time to get angry until none of them were left. ,,Then let's start with a kiss," Crocodile said before he blew the smoke out of the blond's mouth, his hands wrapped around the pommel, holding it in place, his eyes narrowed behind his glasses and his grin almost widened.

,,Before we tear each other apart," Doflamingo finished the other's sentence before their lips met and the taste of the smoke met the slightly bitter taste of the cocaine. The two united for the most infinite meal under the influence of drugs, love and everything without words.

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