#idk. i should be writing my paper rn LOL!

[pearlpool]

🤕!

[svtskneecaps]

HOW THE FUCK DID I HIT 69 PAGES FOR THIS FIC IT'S BEEN LIKE THREE WEEKS

[cr4yolaas]

blue spring — guilt

prev: downward spiral | masterlist | next: wonder

when she returns to class beside him, he does his best to pretend he isn't shocked to see her. he can see the remnants of her lost sleep beneath her eyelids, and the slowed tempo of her movements only further proves her exhaustion. he wants to say something, he just doesn't know what. more importantly, he can't stop staring at her.

"yachi got you this," she mumbles. she places a sandwich, wrapped up in paper with a floral design, in front of him. he notices she has her own, and he fights the urge to smile at the concept of them sharing a meal.

he thanks her quietly before the lecture starts. the exam is tomorrow, and while they were initially planning on having a session this afternoon to go over the content in preparation, he isn't sure if it's right to ask her about it. instead, he watches her spin her pen around in her hand while her notes remain empty. he assumes it's because she already understands the lesson, and he wouldn't be surprised if he was right. there's a thick silence between them. he can't tell if it's suffocating or comfortable, but he hopes and prays its the latter.

he tries desperately to pay attention to his professor. there's graphs and writing all over the board, and his notes should be full, but they aren't. he can't stop looking at her. her eyes catch onto his, and a soft bout of red seeps onto his face. he's about to apologize before she whispers, "i'm sorry for last night."

the lecture at the front of the class is now white noise to him. he reassures her that he doesn't mind, but the guilt is still clear on her face. "it's alright," he begins. "if anything, i understand it."

it takes a moment for her to comprehend his words before she recalls blurry tales from her friends regarding his hunger for volleyball and his abrasive nature. she doesn't think the image they painted in her head so long ago quite matches with who she's talking to right now. in fact, it's much calmer. and nicer. and sweeter.

she chooses not to respond, instead biting the inside of her cheek and pretending to pay attention to the lesson. he tries to follow suit, but it's hard when he finds himself so, so, so horribly magnetized to her.

𝜗𝜚 a much shorter chapter ... i didn't want to go too in-depth to show how yn's world somewhat stops when she's in this trance of endless work

𝜗𝜚 she has definitely forgotten about the math and physics exams. she's way too stressed to be an academic weapon rn

𝜗𝜚 yachi felt insanely bad for their argument. she's not unfamiliar with yn's fits of like anger and stress and she knows it's better not to bother her but she just really wants the best for her friend

𝜗𝜚 tsukishima hasn't been in the house for a while LMAO he's too busy studying and going to work

𝜗𝜚 i feel like it's a little late to mention this and tbh idk if this interferes with my own plot but tsukki works at the museum and he gets paid quite a bit (his boss loves how nerdy he is). hence his fancy car from the last chapter

𝜗𝜚 bokuto loves his mentally deranged friends he's just a little worried for all of them and doesn't know how to show it properly

𝜗𝜚 also i promise yn won't leave kags on read after he spilled his heart out to her LOL she's just. struggling rn.

taglist: @mfcherry @eggyrocks @scxrcherr @yuminako @girlkissersco @diorzs @causenessus @kyo-kyo1 @k0z3me @shironagi @lovingvi @bunninio @hisfuture @lilchubbyyy @gsyche @ghostreader0307

[zivazivc]

Yesterday I watched Help! I'm A Fish and I had a good time! Chuck's seriousness and Fly's upbeat attitude made me think of Eddy M and Ravin respectively.

That movie is SO bizarre. I showed it to a friend a couple of weeks ago, so I watched it twice now, and we both kept screaming at all the emotional whiplash scenes jfksjhfdjh

I think I see what you mean about Eddy M and Ravin being like Chuck and Fly. Especially in the context of your headcanon where they had a rough childhood. They're not much like those characters in my version though.

Eddy M is a rude moody teen who is very matter-of-fact and headstrong - he's a 13-year-old who thinks he knows everything, and he will let you know that with sassy remarks and comebacks.

Ravin is definitely upbeat and more positive but I wouldn't call her Eddy's opposite because she is equally a smartass. She is just very jokey, self-aware nerd face emoji about it. She'll go "errrrmm, ACTually ☝" whenever she thinks she's right about something or when she just wants to annoy you. That's a good descriptor actually; instead of being rude the normal teenage way like Eddy, she is annoying - intentionally. It's a bit and she fully commits.

Dunno how to better describe them lol

Since I know you'll appreciate, I'm sharing a small chunk of my "Floyd runs into the techno troll and their kids" wip under the cut. It's been sitting and collecting dust for a while now because I have no idea how to finish it, but you can get a bit of an idea of what I imagine these two kids being like:

(for context, Floyd is helping Bruce at the bar and guess who happens to visit? And Floyd goes to take an order from them because he is a dumbass and needs too long to realize who he's talking to... The techno troll and Floyd have a private talk, it goes poorly and the techno troll lets him know that he doesn't want him to meet the kids or let them know who he is, and then Floyd hides behind the bar going full blown emo mode... (Also this is an unfinished draft so there might be some klunky parts, idk, I don't feel like editing it rn but I'm also very self conscious about my writing in general so I need to point this out 😬))

. . .

Floyd felt an intense misery wash over him. He really was a fuck up.

He stared at his feet for who knows how long (Maybe he had begun to dissociate?) when the faint sound of light feet stopping nearby made him look up.

Couldn’t this family gathering end already???

He nearly choked on his saliva while standing up in a desperate attempt to find something to busy himself with and not deal with this.

“Uh, h-hi, random kids I don’t know.”

He gave up at the sight of the empty sink with nothing to wash, and carefully looked at the two kids like they were going to bite him from any sudden movements. He probably shouldn’t stare too hard but that was what he ended up doing while taking in their appearance.

“How dumb do you think we are?” the boy—Edwin said with the distinct attitude and mannerism of a brash teen.

“From one to ten,” Ravin added quickly after and much more cheerily, while she pulled a small journal from her hair. She clicked her gel pen and pressed it against the paper in preparation. “Be honest.”

Floyd was a bit dumbfounded to be honest. “... What?” He straightened a little where he was still leaning against the sink and not facing them fully.

“Is on the slower side…” Ravin said out loud while scribbling the words down.

“We have to do this fast,” Edwin explained impatiently and with uncanny matter-of-fact-ness. “Dads think we went to the bathroom.”

“Uh… Do what fast?”

Ravin spoke up while staring at her journal: “How would you describe yourself?”

“What’s your favorite song?” asked Edwin.

"Would you say your hair is white and pink or white and red? And since when is it white? Dad never mentioned that."

“Do you think the words ‘drug addict hobo’ accurately describe you?”

“What’s better, hardcore or emo?”

“I told you it’s not emo!”

"Do you have any health history we should be aware of?" 

“If you were a bug, what type of bug would you be?

"Do we have any other siblings?" 

Floyd’s eyes grew wide from the onslaught of questions. “Whoa, whoa, slow down!” Then reluctantly he added “One at a time, please.” without even realizing he invited them into a conversation.

Edwin looked at his sister. “What was the first one?”

“How would you describe yourself? Three words.”

Floyd didn’t like the first question.

He should probably try thinking of positives…

“Uh…”

“Uhm…”

Panic.

“I’m a good singer. Well, I used to be…”

“That’s your personality?" Edwin deadpanned. "Singing?”

“I’ll just write down: bad self-image, bad under pressure, bad at understanding questions.”

"Those aren't personality traits either, sis."

"Fine! Unconfident, anti-equanimous, intelligently-impaired. There."

"Next question?"

“What’s your favorite song?”

Floyd's mouth was hanging open. He was pretty sure he just got called an insecure some-big-word idiot.

"Hello? We have a time limit. What's your favorite song?" 

“...T-That’s a hard question," he fumbled for words, "there’s so many songs, it would be impossible to choose.”

Ravin looked into her notepad with a sigh and jotted down: “Indecisive. Gives flakey vibes.”

Floyd didn’t know how to respond to that either. Would it be weird if he got upset? Because he was definitely offended. But then again maybe he deserved this. Like some kind of delayed karma.

“If you were a bug, what type of bug would you be?”

Floyd thought about it, trying to come up with some type of direct answer at least for this question. “Hmm… A grig, maybe?”

Edwin made a face. “What the heck is a grig?”

Ravin seemed to have an idea. She wrote down: “An old soul. Depressed.”

“That’s the opposite of a grig!”

“Have you heard of reverse self-awareness?”

“No…?”

“Probably ‘cause I just made it up. But the term kinda suits you." She scratched her scalp with the dull end of her pen."I think?”

Floyd, still feeling absolutely lost in the whole situation, continued to stare mutely.

Edwin was watching him judgingly. "You think there's any awareness there at all?"

Ravin gave a vague hum before getting back on track. "What do you do for a living?" 

"Rae, don't waste our time with stupid questions. It's obvious what he does."

Maybe, Floyd thought, he could finally impress them with something. "I'm a musician, actually."

"Yeah okay, music boy." Edwin replied without missing a beat. "Is the apron a new fashion accessory I don't know about?" 

Floyd’s mouth hung open (if it ever even stopped hanging). These kids were savage…

[blurred-honey]

It would be very interesting to write a book or something that is told entirely in newspapers. Like, I’m interested in if it would work, cause you kinda defy many writing tools like having a main character, and a large part of every newspaper issue would be unimportant to the plot, but it would build out the world and create vibes.

I think the story would have the newspaper go from actually reporting on the terrible things that happened or are happening, to having all those story’s get squashed out by happier things. At some point the reader would need to realize that the world didn’t get better, but the newspaper got much worse, and probably accepted bribe money. The actual stories in the newspaper would be the happiest during the climax of whatever else is going on in the world.

I’m a sucker for secondary plots, so wouldn’t it be so cool if something else was happening that the viewer can see even less of? Like the reading experience I feel should be less reading the newspaper and more looking for clues as to what is real and what is going on behind the flaps of paper.

My thoughts for secondary plots have two different strands rn.

1. The writers or the newspaper company are actively trying to help the readers understand what is happening, but are being forced to cover it all up, so there is subliminal messaging telling the actual stories within stories of baking shows and lost cats.

2. The people getting the newspaper are actively going through their own plot™️. Maybe they are part of the revolution, maybe they are silently communicating with the writers at the news house, maybe they are just going through a nasty divorce. Probably not that one lol. But in any case, the way this would show is through writing on the newspaper itself. I’m also a sucker for nontraditional writing, so the newspaper is shown as an actual newspaper, but maybe some days it has rips. Some days coffee is spilled on it. Some days a whole article is carefully cut out. Some days the newspaper got especially wrinkled from rereading. But quite a lot there is red ink that circles important messages, or jots down a quick note, or writes questions that are similar to what the audience should be asking like “where did the real stories go?”

Idk, I think a nontraditional story like this could be really cool

[isthedogawolfdog]

youtu(dot)be(slash)g-7cLXyMp8E?si=OQ_6WDtl_dnMj9DP

Thoughts on this video on the reintroduction of wolves to Yellowstone and also the article that it cures which claims the Yellowstone narrative is factually inaccurate?

BAHAHAHA I am fucking CACKLING.

Okay so this video:

was posted in late 2020 and BOY HOWDY is it a wild ride. Because I need a distraction and am feeling particularly petty right now I'll see if I can break down the video and it's... um... "facts".

Before I start though the dudes YouTube is chock full of extreme vegan takes so I wouldn't say he's the top tier candidate for good sources lol.

"Introduction"

The beginning is meh. Y'know the usual thing some Youtubers do with the whole "is this really true???" thing with unreasonable amount of suspicion? yeah. He pretty much makes comments on how maybe the reintroduction of wolves into YNP wasn't the "incredible success story that it was made out to be." Which I feel like the, y'know, the many hundreds of research papers on the wolf reintroduction into YNP and the massive benefits it's created kinda contradicts? but I mean what do I know.

"Yellowstone narrative is misleading"

So this part opens up with this video (which I don't feel like watching rn if I were being honest so I'll save that for later) that blew up a bit ago regarding how wolves change rivers, and the claim that it was misleading, untrue, etc. The youtuber (who we shall call Hancock because "Youtuber" will get boring) uses this source to stake the claim that the positive impact wolves have had on rivers in YNP isn't true.

As we would know if we actually did research and didn't talk out of our ass, wolves didn't directly affect the rivers just by hunting elk, but beavers as well. Aspen and willow are, surprise surprise! a favorite food of beavers. Prior to wolf reintroduction riverbeds and waterways in YNP were in terrible shape, mainly due to erosion and lack of support from water loving plants, which are... tada! willow and aspen! Beavers and elk chowed down on these plants in huge amounts due to their numbers being so vastly out of control due to lack of predators. So when wolves came around and started hunting the plentiful beavers and elk, the willow and aspen were basically like "oh shit! we aren't being eaten to the point where we're all dying!! lets grow more!!" and in turn the more willow and aspen = more footing for the soil along waterbeds which means the rivers were saved. Some of this was mentioned in the article that was linked but wasn't mentioned by Hancock so idk what's up with that.

To sum it up, wolves made an impact! And it's silly to just write that off completely!! I think my issue with this part is that Hancock completely writes wolves impact on the environment off, which is frankly ridiculous. The original video may have overstated it a bit, but it's not like it doesn't exist.

"The balance of ecosystems"

Hancock then talks about the complexity of the YNP food chain (kinda), and how some people feel the need to restore the balance in nature if we humans fuck it up which?? like yeah?? we should?? He goes into a schpeel about values or whatever and if we value certain ecosystems over others??? Idk I was NOT tracking.

He mentions his thoughts on "which balance is best for the animals that live there". Goes on slight anthropomorphizing tangent then dives into the next part...:

"Ecology of fear"

Ah, lads, we are back in biology class aren't we. Except this time we are anthropomorphizing the hell out of everything! "The deer are afraid of being eaten alive, so afraid that they sometimes choose to eat less..."

Okay, did anyone tell this guy that the amount of food the herbivores (ungulates namely) before wolves were reintroduced was literally killing everything? Without wolves to balance the prey populations out they overgrazed, populations skyrocketed and so did disease.

The rest of this is a tangent, so I'll skip over it.

"Wolves suffered too"

Hancock cites the outbreaks of canine distemper disease that have occurred in YNP since reintroduction. This is a bit of a mute point, since canine distemper can fuck any canine population up whether it's a brand new reintroduced group of wolves or they've been there for decades.

Also, can we note how he talks about canine distemper then shows a wolf with mange?? hmmmm.

"Numbers of animals vs welfare"

Dude talks about random bullshit regarding animal rights. Loooooots of emotional heartstrings attempting to be pulled. He is 10000% coming from one of those anti-predator perspectives. Biiiig yikes.

"It's too complex (human health analogy)"

This section was basically mansplaining but with vegans lol.

"The choice we have"

He brings in wild animal contraception?????? I???? Girl what. I mean it's a thing yeah but I did not expect that to be where he was going.

Hancock talks about "one of the cruelest, and unfortunately most romanticized and thus most prevalent methods of population control" AKA reintroducing predators. Hmmmm it's almost like he didn't read about the mass amount of ungulates and other prey animals dying off in YNP when winter came (prior to reintroduction) and there wasn't enough food to sustain them all, subjecting them to excruciating deaths and long drawn out starvation and disease.

Hancock then goes onto how animals eat each other alive, which like, yeah, they do. AND THEN he talks about "wild animal suffrage" which, frankly I refuse to google. Blah blah blah he's anti-hunting who would've thought.

"we didn't do it for the animals"

Okay this actually has some value to it. Hancock talks about how wolves weren't reintroduced for their benefit, or anyone else, but only for people and tourism. This is both right and wrong.

I'm sure that all the biologists and hard working members on the reintroduction team would disagree that it wasn't done for the animals, but who knows. Anyway, the point that tourism would rake in a lot of cash for the state was also something that helped wolves get reintroduced, since we know many government officials weren't in it for the animals. So yeah, sort of true, but not really.

Hancock goes on about what animals are concerned about, even adding a little wolf with a thought bubble (which tbh, I'm sure if wolves knew about the technicalities of biodiversity they would love it, since it usually means a better quality of life). More anthropomorphizing and entitled vegan guilt tripping.

At this point I stopped watching, since it's already been roughly an hour, and although I could do this all day, I have to work later.

To answer your question anon, this video is very poorly put together and I wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole. There is little to no research done prior to creating it, and the creator talks from a animal rights activist point of view, which is never helpful.

[miutonium]

Boogie Man, Utionium and Bubbles!! ~@soft-spooks (good luck in class btw u got this!)

Thank you! I did okay for class when you send this Ask but I am now back in class and Im hoping it go well today ;w; thank u for the well wishes 💕💕💕

The Boogie Man 🎵 — Quick! Put your favorite playlist on shuffle and list the first five songs that come up!

My playlist basically went Mr.Worldwide 🧍‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

Professor Utonium 🥼 — Are there any scientific inventions or discoveries that fascinate you?

You heard of girlies telling true crime like tea so let me talk about antibiotics like them too 💅

Radioactive is cool but the history of Penicillin (the first pure Antibiotic) is one of my fav. Im just gonna write a very simplified version of it after rereading it just now lol

There's reports of usage of mold to treat infection way way back before the 20th century especially in ancient greek and egypt but the creation of the first fully synthetic and commercialise antibiotic only started during the early 40s so like if you get any bacterial infection from uhhh lets say a cut on your pinky, you rubbed your eyes with a dirty hand, you look as someone at the wrong time, you had a hanky panky with Patty at the back alley or maybe you just exist, you can die. Existing antimicrobial meds like sulfanilamide even the strongest one sometimes doesnt work with diseases that in modern days we can simply heal with just 1 course of antibiotics.

Anyway how we discovered Penicillin was purely by accident when back in 1929, Alexander Fleming discovered one of the strep strain he was cultivating in his petri dish that he left for a few days for a holiday seemed off. Upon closer inspection he realized there's a strain of mold that grew on the dish and noticed that the bacteria didnt grow around the mold ring so he conducted a few experiments to comfirm his discovery and ended up publishing a paper about his findings. Despite this though no one wanted to do anything about it. They read the paper and just left him on seen and Fleming wasnt a chemist, he's a biologist, the lowest of the low for the nerds back in the 19th century because all the cool kids major in physics and studying radioactive and actively promoting radioactive quackery while their jaw is rotting off from the radium exposure so he couldn't do anything about it and he just let his research in the back burner until like 10 years later a group of nerds at Oxford found his paper and like "wait this man was actually cooking" and decided to take the challenge to purify this mold juice and see if they can turn it into an antibiotic.

In early stages of their research, there didnt use like a big steep container to 'procure' the mold but instead uses a narrow container with large surface area, think of casserole dish to get the juice because the mold only grows on the surface of the liquid instead of inside the liquid. Purifying isn't easy, at least 2000 litres of purified Penicillin juice were needed just to make antibiotics enough to treat 1 person so 2 of the big nerds, Howard Florey and Norman Heatley flew to the US and asked if anyone could mass produce it and then like jump to idk pages of wikipedia page later it was being mass produced in the early 40s during the peak of WW2 (there's too many conflict happens during this and the girls are fighting over who should be credited for it and I am not into some nerd drama rn)

Here's some interesting facts that I found out while reading:

- During the early stages of mass production, they still haven't produce enough Penicillin for the people they're treating and running clinical trials and they discovered that patients who received Penicillin shot also excreted those antibiotics back into their urine. At least 70% of the Penicillin they got is stored in the balls floating in the urine so they took the pee, crystallised them and extracted the Penicillin from the pee crystals so at least half of the people who gets the antibiotics shot got them from some guy's pee.

- When Florey and Heatley planned to fly to the US, they feared they couldn't bring the mold in a small glass tube without it being missing so they laced the pocket of their coat with the mold.

- Winston Churchill almost died from Pneumonia back in 1943 but fully cured by Sulfanilamide but the tabloid at time said Penicillin cured him simoly because they wanted to instill confidence to the public about antibiotic

- During Clinal Trials, they tested on animals for toxicity but they didn't tested it on guinea pigs. If they tested it on guinea pigs there's a possibility that antibiotics is not what we have now or didn't exist at all since Penicillin is toxic to guinea pigs

Anyway cut to decades later we abused the fuck out of antibiotics and there's rising cases of antibiotics resistant bacteria. It is estimated that we are 5 years away from creating antibiotics that works on the bacteria that resist antibiotics in the present. So the next time if you are prescribed with antibiotics, FINISH THEM ACCORDING TO DR'S ORDERS!!!

Bubbles 🫧 — List three things that bring you joy!

Answered here!

[higurehige]

hi hello. been 5000 years since I have been tagged in much. uwu thank you @spadefish in return i slaaap uuuuh @duskdragonxiii @etakeh @vampiremasochist annnd @ponyacci (chose 2 of these based on activity feed but still important non-the-less! I hope you guys are all well even if we are but strangers in this wide blue world. Obvs feel free to ignore if you want to)

1. Are you named after anyone? A country singer. Course no one really thinks of her when they hear my name.

2. When was the last time you cried? Hrmmmm. Iunno probably 2 months ago over cirque du freak book series. I cry over books a lot.

3. Do you have kids? I am the kid. Do the 9 cats in my house count? On a serious note - no and I don't plan to. I have far too many problems and raising a kid would just wind up with me placing at least HALF of those problems on them. No. This curse ends with me. I don't think I'd even feel comfortable helping raise someone elses kid if we were in a relationship.

4. What sports do you play/have you played? I picked up archery recently! That's cool. I don't go as often as I should bc it's a bit expensive...but...yea! Archerys cool. Working on learning both recurve and compound. recurve for funsies and compound for hunting. (I just want an excuse to go sit out in the woods for hours on end doing fuck all and maybe, possibly bringing home some meat too)

5. Do you use sarcasm? Not often. I'm pretty blunt and no matter how hard I try to control myself I end up sounding like that one guy from guardians of the galaxy "Nothing goes over my head. I would catch it"

6. What is the first thing you notice about people? -shrug- Their face? I guess? Or whatever color they're wearing. Maybe their shoes. Idk...I'm terrible at facial recognition so I go ape trying to compensate for this.

7. What's your eye color? Green

8. Scary movies or happy endings? (both good but probably horror lean)

9. Any talents? Depends what you count as a talent. Born with? Insane observational skills? Uh I can eat actual rotten and moldy food and not get sick? Uuuuuuh. Hmmm....I can dilate my pupils at will? I can bend my legs freaky directions but not freaky enough to look like a contortionist. naturally good with animals I guess? Idk, nothing to write home about.

10. Where were you born? South Haven Michigan

11. What are your hobbies? Reading, drawing, writing (lol to both of these), gardening (i live in an apartment so I cant really do like...vegetable gardening but, I got plants! =3), studying various animals (and bugs), studying plants, photography, I come and go out of other hobbies, honestly. Adhd moments of "wow that looks cool" doing it once and never again....I'm trying, chief.

12. Do you have any pets? Avery (black cat), Diva and squeakers (twin solid gray cats), Baguatte (orange boi), Tiny man (gray stripy fella), Shaggy (not really MY cat, he's just some stray but....-sigh- he is sleeping in my house rn so I GUESS. (brother to Tiny man I think. very similar appearances). then there's weasle and skunk. (also cats) Do the assassin bugs i just bought for my garden count as pets? bc I have assassin bugs in my plants now =3

13. How tall are you? 5'4 ish and built like a brick.

14. Favorite subject in school? Didn't have a good time in school, so I hated all of it. Excelled at English and reading classes.

15. Dream job? Biology field. I want to get paid to study animal/insect behaviors and write papers on them. As it is I am just doing this shit for free lol

[pathetic-gamer]

thank you for the tag @edgeworth-s !!

LAST SONG: technically it's Le duc sous l'eau, but that's because it's the last thing I remember from my go the fuck to sleep playlist last night. The real answer is Wake Me When It's Over by The Cranberries

FAVORITE COLOR: Really in to various reds and oranges rn

LAST MOVIE/TV SHOW: movie - American Fiction, TV - Twin Peaks (thank u alan wake for reminding me how good that show is lol)

SWEET/SAVORY/SPICY: uhhhh savory probably? but I like spice here and there

LAST THING GOOGLED: "Moby Dick word count"

CURRENT OBSESSION: *shadow man voice* Alan Wake. but also Blorbos From My Brain (thinking a lot about that Rich and Caroline and Emily thing, but to little effect on paper lol)

LAST BOOK: American Pastoral by Philip Roth - no relation to American Fiction the film, but I do see some really interesting structural similarities between them. I haven't read Erasure, which American Fiction is based on, so thats conjecture to some extent since the film cant be exactly 1:1, but they both are about authors working on books and both use a sort of meta-narrative that includes the entire book the author is writing? idk I'll have to read Erasure and get back to y'all lol

LAST FIC: Most recent chapter of Little Moments of Self Indulgence! (felix and annette von fire emblem, of course) let them kisssssssss

LOOKING FORWARD TO: d&d tonight lol

okay I get nervous trying to tag people so anyone who wants to participate definitely should. Especially new mutuals from the last month or so! (and tag me so I can read them lol)

[rollercoasterwords]

hey so idk if you’ve seen what’s going on in the fandom rn on tik tok with like ppl shipping orion and fleamost?? i think?? and obviously with that comes the discourse “why is it leah’s mlm ships??” etc etc and ik you’ve ranged and raved abt ppls attitudes towards wlw ships and like that realm in general but like what do you think abt this? bc like. i think there’s truth to the fact that like ppl always cling to the mlm ships but i don’t the negativity thag is bred with this criticism is a good thing yk? idk i’m just thinking thoughts and i wanna know ur thoughts bc i love ur brain and i wanna crawl in there so

lmaoooo i have not seen that but. well sure i'll give u my thoughts since u asked so nicely <3

my first thought is mostly just why would anyone ever care about that. but like. as i have said before do whatever u want it's fanfiction have fun with it and of course i do not want to be drawn and quartered for my hypocrisy seeing as i have in fact written like. stories about very minor side characters. i suppose for me the thing is that what interests me in these minor characters is looking at how their canon stories could potentially intersect in the most devastating ways, so the main thing i don't personally understand is what people find interesting if they're removing the side characters from canon completely, because then they essentially just become. names. on paper. y'know?

so! not sure how or why people are shipping orion + fleamont but i suppose if it's rooted in some sort of....canon...where like they were in love but then took drastically different life paths or something? but then i do feel like there are other characters u can do that with, so again i'm not really sure i understand the draw to those guys in particular. it mostly just feels a little silly to me and well i suppose i can be a bit of a hater sometimes and i think maybe this is one of those times <3 but obviously there's no harm in anyone shipping them i might clown on u if u do but at the end of the day it is not that serious and people should just write whatever they want when it comes to fanfic.

the sexism debate on the other hand.....god. need a cigarette for this one. i mean i suppose i can elaborate a bit more if there's anything specific u wanna know when it comes to my thoughts but overall i think the whole "UMMMM why does this fandom always find new mlm ships to focus on instead of giving the WOMEN time to shine!! we need more wlw rep this is sexism + mlm fetishization!!!!" is. mostly virtue signaling. and a huge simplification of the situation. unfortunately people have really latched onto a few key buzzwords and so i fear the discourse may be here to stay lol

[euphoricfilter]

OMG Tae looked so cute, pretty, and hot in his photobook teasers. He's such a model omg! the flowers on his face! the end of teaser 1 omg! Him jumping on the bed makes me think he'll show a carefree, inner child vibe too? Is it too late to expect a more feminine suit color like pink or purple. he looks so nice in these colors :/ The third outfit should be the one from his insta profile pic? But it's a black and white pic so hm.

School rant time...I have one group paper and another paper due on thursday and friday. and i barely started writing omg TT im praying i can finish them tmr since i have no class. im redoing my group part bc i realized it didnt fit the thesis :/ tbh idk anything in this class, so its a big struggle omg. i have my friend helping but omg... (theyre struggling to help rn lol) the other paper is analyzing your own pic(s) and then you have to present online. theyre both about a pg or so but no motivation and stressed :/ ughhh just stressed overall.

-🖤

his teasers were so pretty 😭 the flower shots were my favorite he looked so good. him jumping on the bed was cute until i saw he had shoes on and then my smile dropped

ooo inner child would be such a cool concept, though this looks quite classy and elegant which is very taehyung

i hope there’s femininity in his photofolio!!!! he always looks so good in more feminine clothes, pink would be so cute as well, i love all the bows and frilly shirts as well!!

i think his IG pfp was probably from this photoshoot

oh no 🥲 good luck and i hope you can get it done. i hate school, i took a year out because i didn’t know what i wanted to take… here i am months later with application season slowly approaching and i still have no idea what i want to do 😭 it’s so stressful and school sucks ass because i don’t excel in anything and i don’t have one particular interest

i feel you :(

maybe take a break for now, relax a little. it’s not good to be stressed and maybe once you take a little break and do something you enjoy you can go back to your project and maybe you’ll have a new insight into what you can talk about! maybe see it from a new perspective— if the motivation isn’t there right now then it’s not gonna miraculously appear, take a little while to rest!

and get a snack! a really yummy one

[applepidotcom]

Almost shat my heart out LMAO my laptop shut down on me in the middle of me writing my final paper and then didn’t want to turn on I’m shaking in my cowgirl boots rn it wasn’t until I was crying to her that if she went down, I would go down with her and idk I guess that scared her as much as it scared me bc she turned back on right after that ….. I’m dreading the day I have to replace her bc it is SO much money and there are so many options out on the market, but I think I’m going to have to do it sometime soon bc I live in constant fear of her shutting down on me bc of how old she is o.o which has already happened once before so. Maybe. I should invest in a new laptop before things get worse lol…….

[ceresys]

cutely fills out another ask game

formatting sucks bc mobile and also i should be sleeping

What's your name? How did you get it?

-- espér! it comes from the french word espérance which means hope :3

How old are you? Does it change, or do you stay the same age?

-- ageless

What's your gender and sexuality?

-- vaguely masc, sometimesongic & aroace

What's your species?

-- short answe i am No

If money wasn't an issue, where would you want to travel?

-- france for the lols but uhh i heard nordic countries are really nice generally

What's your dream job?

-- hmmmm not sure

If you have exomemories, was your old life very different from your current one?

-- n/a

What kinda music do you like? Feel free to share a playlist if you have one!

-- french indie or pop is quite nice :] my fav rn is sometimes by mattyeux and princess chelsea ive listened to it for 29 hours in under a week already sjskakksksjj

Is there anyone in your system that you're extra close to?

-- nah

Do you have your own space in headspace? What's it like?

-- no but i could make one rn

How often do you front? Is fronting easy or difficult for you?

-- checks non existent notes . i have fronted once and that is right now

Is it easy or hard for you to communicate with the others in your system?

-- pretty easy but thats regular for us

Do you have any friends/family/partners outside your system?

-- *me personally* no. but we as a whole have partner systems yes and friends etc

Post a picture of how you look! (FC, Picrew, selfie, drawing, etc)

-- 😳 hold on

Is there anyone in your system you absolutely don't get along with?

-- grabs a piece of paper . that one unknown guy who fronted and put the cedilla on the word façade when writing in english but spelt "the" right before it wrong. "...tbe façade..." it was so funny idk

How would you describe your personal aesthetic?

-- ooh ooh ooh. flowers, orange, french stuff

Do you have any skills or talents the others don't?

-- im cooler than them /j

Are you part of any fandoms, subcultures, communities etc?

-- hmmm no

Is there anything that makes it obvious you're the one fronting (accent, tone of voice, quirks, etc)?

-- i dont think so

What's a silly fear you have?

-- idk

What are some of your current goals?

-- s u r v i v e

Favorite food?

-- for me like instant noodles its very,

Favorite drink?

-- waterr

Favorite ice cream flavor?

-- i haven't had it in my existence 🤔

Was it hard for you to adapt to being part of a system?

-- nah

How do you spend your time when you aren't fronting?

-- checks non existent note again

How do you like to dress?

-- comfy

What's a belief of yours that others might consider weird?

-- hmmmmmm lemme think

Do you do anything creative (writing, drawing, roleplaying, stitching, cosplaying, etc)? Feel free to show off some of your work!

-- noh :(

How do you personally explain your system's plurality? (Spiritual, psychological, gateway, soulbond, neurogenic, etc)

-- stares uhhhhhh complicated

Do you have any disorders or neurodivergencies that the rest of the system doesn't?

-- not me personally

If your system has disorders or neurodivergencies, do your symptoms differ from the others'?

-- my attention span is extra low 💀

If you could pick a super power, what would it be?

-- ooh hard one. know all world languages (to avoid catches: to as much extent possible, updates to stay with the times, i actually have a decent accent, it doesnt explode my brain, etc)

What's your favorite thing about yourself?

-- gay

Do you have a system role?

-- nope :( but maybe the spotify listener who listens to spotify too often /j

[whyareyouhere66]

Haikyuu Characters as Quotes From My Life

S O

Basically, this chapter is just some of the Haikyuu characters as quotes that me, my friends, and even some of my classmates have said. Yeah, it's simple as that. They don't really make sense *the quotes*, even with context so yeah lol.

----

-*-* "Christian Grey may be 50 shades of fucked up- but I'm 50 shades of 'I'm gonna whoop your ass" -Kuroo

-*- *"I think I have a crush on Pennywise." -Tanaka

-*-* "If only men had brains and balls, at the same time." -Kiyoko

-*-* "No Im not gonna eat my cat, I'm not a cannibal." -Nishinoya

-*-* " I look like a warthog and have the personality of a she-devil." -Yamamoto

-*-* "See, I told you Megan, my boobs are getting bigger." -Asahi

-*-* "Do you have gum in your pocket or are you just excited to see me?....I think you're excited to see me." -Oikawa *to Iwaizumi, most likely*

-*-* "Tell me a good song- and we're not listening to the trolls soundtrack." -Ushijima *talking to Tendou*

-*-* "If I write my essay about Fortnite and global warming what will I get?" -Bokuto

-*-* "I once had a guy walk up to me at target and he was like 'wanna buy some ball wash?'" -Terushima

-*-* "Ryan Reynolds is hot." -Ennoshita

-*-* "Jeff Bezos would be a great drug dealer." -Kenma

-*-* "Ugh that's nasty....gonna give us fricking herpes..." -Akaashi

-*-* "HE HAD TWO GLIZZIES" -Bokuto

-*-* "It looks like pennywise could crawl out of that things butthole." -Hinata

-*-* "I just got winky faced by Kahoot." -Tsukishima

-*-* "I'm gonna get fax paper, and make cards that say "we give free bj's" and tape it on peoples doors." -Kuroo

-*-* "If I have to listen to another minute of JoJo Siwa I will lose my mind." -Daichi

-*-* "YOU CLOSED MY DUOLINGO TAB?!" -Nishinoya

-*-* "Can any orgasms so photosynthesis...?" -Kageyama

-*-* "My shoulder is no longer a virgin." -Yamaguchi

-*-* "Don't change, we hate you just the way you are." -Iwaizumi

-*-* "Mom can you leave so I can curse at my friends?" -Sugawara *talking to Ukai*

-*-* "We thought there was cum in the bathroom." -Tanaka

-*-* "I don't like purple, I like ducks" -Hinata

-*-* "The bible is not smut, bitch." -Kenma (I'm sorry if anyone finds this offensive-)

-*-* "Mort I cannot 'move it move it' anymore" -Yamomoto

-*-* "They kill pears- that's why it's so sad. But pineapples stay alive, pears just- die!!" -Bokuto

-*-* "Not gonna lie man but your toes are...dry." -Tanaka

-*-* "That's like going up to a police officer holding up a bag and going, "hey can you step outside for a minute, go down and get some coffee, I should be done in about 15 minutes?" -Kindaichi

-*-* "I swear to god I will turn this- this navy blue van around!!" -Daichi/Ukai

-*-* "Nah he's got little-man-itis." Tsukishima *talking about Hinata, ofc*

-*-* "Don't we have a leader in the real world?" *Bokuto, continue to next quote *

-*-* "Yeah we've got Michael Jackson." -Kuroo *that one was a 2-parter haha*

-*-* "YOU'LL BELIEVE GOD IS A WOMENNNN- is that vodka??" -Nishinoya

-*-* "It's probably like, burnt fire or something." -Oikawa

-*-* "Why do you not like shirtless men." -Tanaka

-*-* "I'm gonna start a petition to make Boston a continent....or maybe New Jersey." -Hinata

-*-* "We've known eachother since the 1800's- we went to Travis Scott concerts with George Washington." -Tanaka *talking abt Yamamoto*

-*-* "Dame cabeza" -Tanaka

-*-* "No one likes Jacobs, Jacobs are ugly and raspy." -Tsukishima

:D

K great, so anyways-

Idk that's all I got rn, y'all got a free glimpse of my strange friends and even stranger school. Hope you enjoyed and adios

edit: holy shit this blew up a lot faster than I expected- thanks so much y’all

[thebangtancloud]

I'm really afraid...

dearest readers, it's been the longest period of time I've been away from Tumblr - a place that really had become a stress buster for me for the past whole year. Needless to say, I'm more stressed than I've ever been.

Tomorrow by this, I'd probably be sleeping for 16 hours straight after finishing my exam. I really needed to come here and just let out a few of my frustrations before I can write my exam tomorrow. I'm really struggling with a shit ton of things rn, and it's really come to the stage where I've saturated my brain to the point where I go blank minutes into opening my book. Maybe I just need to talk about it.

Thankfully I'm not as anxious as I thought I would be. A few months ago - when my anxiety was getting out of my hand - there would be instances I'd simply pass out due to my stress, which I feared would happen during my exam or even before it. I made it a point to eat healthy food regularly to give my body the nutrition that it needs, but somewhere down the line, I haven't been taking good care of myself.

I've stopped working out like I used to, I don't run anymore and neither am I able to sit through long workouts because I'm exhausted from sitting at my desk all day. A few weeks ago I went through a really dark phase, to the point where I wasted a good week doing absolutely nothing but lying down in the darkness and thinking about all the things that could go wrong with my life. During that time, I excessively slept for almost 12 hours each day, went to cook some food or do some work and lie back down for another nap. That really terrified me, because one day I found myself taking the lift to the last floor of my building and simply standing by an open window - emotionless. That really... idk. That scared me. It planted a thought in my head that should never germinate, never even be there for that matter. I told my mum that night and needless to say, she was really shaken. She clearly told me the next day when she left for work, "Just take it easy. And don't go to the 18th floor. Just don't."

Of course, I haven't gone there ever since. Maybe it was me crying out to God every night - but I came out of that phase just as quickly as I slipped into it. I don't even want to mention this, but it's been playing on my mind for a while so why not. There was this big thing in my country regarding the postponement of the entrance exam. Apparently, the dates were clashing with a bunch of different exams and giving the students a lot of stress. A case was filed which was taken to the High Court because apparently there were 16 reported suicides due to the pressure on the students. The case - of course - was dismissed with the exam scheduled to take place as planned. That just really disturbed me.

I'm much more active now, just not like I want to be. I want to go for a run. I want to work out till my lungs burns. I want to go cycling in the rain. And I will after I'm done with this exam.

I know you're probably thinking of telling me to take it easy, but since I've given this exam last year and couldn't clear it, I know the stress and the disappointment that follows. I don't want to be in that same place again.

Thankfully, I feel healthy, unlike a few months ago when I'd feel lightheaded not even an hour after eating something (which was all due to my anxiety lol). I'm much more confident about my paper - the only fear now being blanking out in the middle of the exam.

*sigh*

I feel good to write this. I feel good to be back on Tumblr. The comments and messages people have left really warm my heart and make me feel so loved. Thank you so much for that. I love you all.

It's only me predicting the hibernation that I'll slip into after my exam, but my mum insists that I'll be too excited to even think of sleeping lol. If I do not end up sleeping for days on end, I'll soon be here to chat with you all!!

~Ray🌦

[izepeche]

I am new to the strange obsession, but oh my gosh your works are amazing. I just want sinister strange to do whatever he wants and for me to say thanks afterwards.

I dunno what to say omg thank you thank you thank you love 🥺✨ im honestly surprised ppl still show up on my blog lol

I have so many things I wanna do but with my condition i can’t do much but i should be fully cleared to go home by tuesday ✨

but i agree. i was never really into Strange until this movie. i mean i love his design and ive drawn him many times before but idk he just didnt speak to me before now.

i have the filthiest shit to write and draw i am so vile and feral because of it but so is he. they knew exactly what they were doing when then designed him omfg. i have a HC that he’s really into bondage (including self bondage) and its killing me. its killing me that i cant write it all rn.

you did not ask for this, so i apologize in advance. but ive had this little thing rolling in my head so -

Sinister seems like he used to be a professor and its driving me crazy thinking about him in a AU being the low toned sort of teacher who everyone respects. never raises his voice (and doesnt have to) to get his pupils to behave because he’s also silently terrifying. you can hear a pin drop in his class, even when its a study period and he’s sipping his coffee and reading a book. could probably make a student cry without even trying, without even looking at them (tho he will glance to see the tears) and would secretly enjoy it because he’s a bloody bastard. takes no shit and is clearly passionate about teaching and I just wanna see him in glasses and at a desk fiddling with papers? like look-

In this Professor Sinister! AU id say he definitely smells like dark roast coffee and old books. wears a sort of musky, old timey smelling cologne with spicy citrus notes. keeps to himself, doesn’t really interact with the other professors, but may strike up a short conversation with maintenance or the cleaning staff in the evening. even though he’s a strict man he sports a more casual appearance than one would think. im thinking just regular slacks n shoes, rolled up sleeves to his forearms, usually wears a black turtleneck or dark button down shirt with a few too many buttons open if the AC is busted (again), thick salt and pepper hair slightly tussled as its been run through by his fingers because these fucking kids can’t even double space their essays how did they pass high-school.

crystal eyes lingering a bit too long on an unsuspecting pupil who is always well behaved and attentive. openly teases them to the point of hot embarrassment when they ask to be excused to the restroom, even though they asked so nicely and they really have to go. but ,” ah, ah, not until i say so.” “you know you just went 10 minutes ago” “you took too long last time”

purposefully writes comments on their papers ‘see me after class’, even if its the most well-written dissertation he’s read all year. he’s rather knowledgeable and will always find something to offer correction on. as ‘punishment’, he tells them to help him prepare for the next class by writing what he tells them on the chalkboard. this is when his usual low key tone, shifts to something else.

The professor not so subtly stares at them, scrutinizing their handwriting and how their dainty wrists move under his command. no, Professor Strange definitely does not get off to how they struggle when he asks them to write higher, up on their tip toes and a bit wobbly. he’ll make them erase a whole line if they make a single mistake in their penmanship (which is easy because of how tired and cramped they are getting). he’ll cruelly mock them, “are you getting distracted?” “we can try something easier if this is too hard for you” “why are you stopping, you’re not finished yet” “i mean, Jesus, it looks awful. but i guess if that’s the best you can do-“

and if he’s feeling particularly snippy he’ll snap a ruler on his desk to startle them, possibly messing them up further, barely bothering to stop the smile dancing on his lips. he still throws in a smart ‘thank you’ when theyre done that definitely doesn’t make up for his brash behavior. its hard to tell if his harsh interactions are serious or a ploy of flirtation, but its intense enough to get under the skin every time that they are completely flustered when they gather their things to leave his room.

its wrong to be tormenting his own innocent pupil like this- many would say the poor thing doesn’t deserve it and the professor's intentions aren’t noble. but its not wrong if they keep coming back, right? not that he gives a damn, nor gives them much of a choice; he’s not exactly a model on morality. besides, a man can have a little fun, no?

i just- love him. i love him i love him

as soon as i saw him i knew it was curtains for me. he is utter perfection because sinister is just so fucking broken and deliciously unhinged and loosely disguised as a quiet gentleman. i love the fact he’s self aware enough to know he’s a filthy bastard but he just. doesnt. care. and like great! neither do i sweetheart. id beg this man to break me, and like please sir call me all the names.