#idk whats going on irl tbr

[cvnt4him]

It's so crazy how built different I truly have to be from others. I share things when I want people to like ask me if I'm okay or if I'm genuinely ranting for the sake of myself bc yk....this is my account and I'm not gonna shy away from posting shit that I want to, but when it comes down to the internet and then one person....I choose the Internet. Bc at least I know the Internet won't actually give a fuck and whatever I say will drown along with everyone else's shit, when you say something to one person you're expecting a certain response because you shared something so vulnerable. I have a hard time opening up one on one but it's SOOOO easy to just write it out on Tumblr or my notes yk? Why is that so hard for everyone else. I really feel like sometimes people js be attention seeking, which in a way is hypocritical. Idk it's just, exhausting to constantly entertain those who clearly WANT the attention rather than need it, there is a difference. Like, I understand certain people can only handle so much. But like why TF is it SOOOOO hard to keep some things to yourself..and then you get upset when people call you out on it. Idfk I must be like normal now bc that shit is fucking weird. Like I "suffer" from the same things as this person and many others but low-key people be blowing ts WAYYYYY out of proportion. Like I get it, it is really hard and sometimes uncomfortable and constant...but it doesn't have to be shared always, especially bc you're so young. Trauma plays a huge part in a lot of mental illnesses, different kinds of trauma really can tick off more violent or intense things, sometimes what you may suffer with can become more frequent. But it gets to a point. Like yes, awareness we love that. But blaming shit on what you "suffer" with, mind you I have the same thing and it's not as crazy as some people make it seem, [yes some people struggle more with certain things] like it's really easy for me not to talk about everything I struggle with mostly bc I fear people will say "well you didn't say this before...." Bc not EVERYTHING needs to be shared... I get that. I'll say how I'm feeling but I won't go into like...even the bare minimum of detail for the fact that it doesn't always have to be shared. Ts is js so annoying to see idfkkkkkm

[someotherdog]

hey y'all. long time no see, sorry for my absence. unfortunately due to just... the general state of the world i have absolutely no desire to write a word. :/ i'm trying to get my muse back but i can't even force myself to read other people's work anymore even tho my tbr book list is like waist-high. (i did however finish my first quilt, it looks like shit but at least i'm not completely unable to express myself through art... small mercies) so i'm very sorry to anyone that's waiting on a reply from me, i truly can't say when i'll be able to write back so i understand if anyone wants to drop a thread or break mutualship. i'm gonna explain some more under the cut but no one is obligated to read it, i just don't have anywhere else to put my feelings.

2025 is my twentieth anniversary of roleplaying. of course i haven't actively roleplayed every single month of every year, there were a lot of long breaks, some even more than a year or so, but collectively yeah it's been since 2005 that i've roleplayed in some fashion or another. whether here on tumblr for the last ten years, or on sites like roleplayer.me (which i often dream about for some reason?) or myspace or even those forum boards way back in the day. so it's been part of my life longer than it hasn't. after my father died when i was a kid, i basically had free rein of the internet and eventually stumbled upon rp during my harry potter phase when i saw a myspace profile for padma patil and was like 'huh she's a fictional character?' and basically it just snowballed from there.

rp has been kind of a secret shame i've had, i've only told like two people in real life about it; i basically just describe it as 'collaborative writing' when i get even close to explaining what i'm doing on my phone or computer all the time, and tbh i rarely get close enough to anyone irl for anyone to ask, my family's just used to me being so secretive, but i don't volunteer that information to acquaintances or anything. idk why i'm so embarrassed of it, it's really not a big deal, but it just makes me feel like a loser somehow. idk. i guess because for a very long time, it was my only outlet and only way to socialize, so it and the internet in general was my only lifeline when my agoraphobia was at its worst. i guess i just feel that i should've been at the club instead of writing replies that don't matter, basically shouting into the void besides the writing partner in question and maybe like one or two random people that may come across my blog, but i didn't want to be at the club. i don't want to be at the club. my life has been pretty shit my entire life but i don't want any other life. not really.

so as i approach twenty years, i've been thinking a lot about retiring. not that i want to stop writing, muse permitting, but that at some point, i will have to stop roleplaying. i know that on other sites like jcink, it's normal for writers to keep roleplaying into their forties, but here on tumblr, there is a ceiling. a point where people stop putting their actual age and go with 20+, 30+, etc because no one wants to write with someone who is old. i know that a lot of people go on to write while having partners and kids, two things that are very very unlikely for me, but at some point whether we want to stop or not, we will just log off one day and... never return. we won't have time anymore, or we can't find anyone to write with, or just a sudden indifference, but eventually it all ends. and i don't really want it to end, despite my lack of inspiration. i just can't really imagine my life without roleplay, but i know that it will end, that i'll just run out of time or interest or feel too old for it (tho i don't feel like there are really... new younger roleplayers anymore, at least not so much on tumblr), but i find that prospect really scary. to have something be part of my daily life for twenty years and for it to just... go away.

i actually reread a fanfic i wrote in 2010/2011 last week. it made me a little sad because i was just a baby when i wrote it and i was so, so, so lonely at the time of writing it, but it was also a time when i didn't know it was should've not should of (lol) and i also plagiarized IT by stephen king for a single line (it must've been what i was reading at the time) but the bare bones of the way i write now was in it. the language was a little simplistic, but my tone of voice was in there. and it just made me feel bad for seventeen year old me because i'm still doing this. but i don't want to stop doing this, but i know at some point i will need to.

it doesn't help that i haven't felt inspired to write a narrative sentence in weeks. i go through dry spells and writer's block frequently, but this one has felt so much different than before. i'm stressing out a lot about politics (obviously) and also i've been having a lot of health anxiety. mostly about bird flu and the morality rates for cats, because i work a public facing job where i interact with hundreds of people a week, and while i mask at work and frequently wash my hands/use hand sanitizer, and i also never let my cats out or feed them raw food, there's still a risk of tracking it into my house on my shoes or my dogs bringing it in after going outside (tho that's not very often bc it's very cold in the midwest and they're not breeds that love snow) and after i had to put down my cat last summer, i truly fear losing my cats now after only having them for six months because i lost my soul cat after eight years together and it just wasn't enough. i also have health anxiety due to, as mentioned, my father's death at a young age and i've been basically having daily panic attacks. it's just creatively sapped me when my inspiration is fickle enough and generally only comes in short bursts (that's what she said). it makes me sad to not write, and when i look in my drafts for something that might inspire me, i just get overwhelmed because there's so many replies i've let sit for months. so i know anyone would say mental health over replies, but when my mental health is just so bad lately no matter what i do... idk it just feels like a bottomless pit or something. it doesn't help that i had a really bad group rp experience last year lmao but that's a story for a different day. so it's just made me question and ruminate a lot, and while i know i need help, i just don't have the money either to take care of myself in that way. i feel very stuck, but at least i'm not agoraphobic anymore? but it's kind of strange because i miss it so much sometimes. it feels sick to miss my metaphorical cage, but i do.

so anyway if you actually read all of this, i really commend you for being a trooper. thank you for listening if you did! and again sorry if you're waiting on any replies from me, i hope to be back soon.

[glassamphibians]

6, 13, and 14 for the book ask game? feel free to give me your longest, most rambling answers :3

- what books have you read in the last month?

this is the little collage storygraph made of my november reads! I’be been trying to focus on my physical nonfiction tbr for november but the majority are fiction audiobooks

- do you have a good reads?

yes and i check it like other people check twitter ‼️‼️ its got my irls and stuff so im not linking it but it exists

- do you mark/dogear books you own?

I don’t dogear pages bc i have a billion bookmarks and one of the best parts of starting a book is picking which one matches best BUT i absolutely mark up my books!! A lot of the First Books in my favorite series are annotated and then i’ll do like two chapters of the second book and forget about it. More recently I’ve been matching chapters to stickers/washi tape, and whenever i go to a national park i stamp whatever book i brought with me instead of a passport.

seen above are: 1) my copy of the raven boys that is so worn and sun damaged and was originally color coded but my highlighter’s kept dying & being replaced so idk what any of it means anymore 2) thistlefoot <3 one of my favorite books ever 3) british marine horror anthology i read during my trip to acadia :)

book questions!!

[kithtaehyung]

hi...i just read three tangerines and WHEWWWW you are so evil for that cus the way i forgot i was in my bed when i was reading. and the way you wrote yoongi was so hot; him calling her doll and even making sure she wanted to continue even though he was desperate T__T ...THE CHAIN TOO OMG THAT GOT ME SO BADDD and idk why but i imagined this yoongi with orange hair hehe 🍊 anyways, thank u for writing three tangerines, i loved it and will definitely read the rest too <3

LMAOOO well hello! okay so true story.. idk what in the hell i was on when i wrote that HAHAHA like i finally went back to reread it the other week and i was like.. "what... what the fuuuuuc? what the hell was i thinking??"😂 anyway. i'm so happy you enjoyed it and your reblog made me smile so big sdkljfsdklf THE CHAINS ARE GONNA MAKE A COMEBACK TRUST MEEEEEE

orange hair, huh? that's actually.. huge, and you're so rude to yourself for doing that LOL. if you do want true visuals, we didn't get any irl until haegeum yoongi, so that's 3tan yoongi if you wanna imagine him until.. a certain chapter eheheheh

i saw that you put the masterlist on your tbr so i'm giddy af! have fun and take your time with that series, savor it bc it ramps up once you hit Basketball (we warn everyone bc it's pretty true ahaha)

seriously, love that you put commentary and reached out! it means the world omfg. happy reading and i'm ready to scream whenever you are if you keep going mwahaha

[an-avid-reader]

Legend (#1) - Marie Lu

my rating: 4/5 stars

In a world where the Patriots/Colonies and the Republic are at odds and there’s a plague in the poorer parts of the US, Day is an unstoppable street criminal with good intentions. When his family’s house gets marked by Republic soldiers, Day’s only thought is to steal a cure before his family member dies. June is a top student at Drake University—a prodigy. When her brother, Metias, gets caught in a cross-fire during a mission, June is fast-tracked to becoming a soldier. Her first mission: track down Day. As Day and June come from such opposite backgrounds, is it possible that their paths would’ve crossed otherwise? 

Link to Goodreads // Spoiler-free review below

It felt so weird to switch this book from “to-read” to “reading” and now to “read” on Goodreads—this was the first book I placed on my virtual tbr and now, 6 years later I’ve read Legend! Honestly, I didn’t know much about this story going in, besides the fact that it’s a dystopian trilogy...and that, after reading a bunch of those stories, I was skeptical going into this book however I was still really excited to pick it up and I’m glad that I did! 

Legend alternates between Day and June’s perspectives and we get to see how drastically their lives are; when their worlds collide it was super fascinating, even though they put A LOT of trust from nowhere into each other. I sort of wish we got a few chapters from other characters, such as Commander Jameson, Thomas, and Tess, but of course without ruining the story. The other reason I didn’t give a full 5/5 was because I was able to guess bits of the twist pretty early on, albeit I wasn’t sure how it was going to pan out until we came to that part of the story. (We also gotta leave some room for improvement for the subsequent books!)

So the main premise of the story is that there is a war between the Colonies/Republic and the Patriots. To be completely honest, I still can’t really explain why this war occurred, nor what either’s agenda is (except for maybe power, but in terms of politics I’m ???). One reason why I wish we got more POVs is to explore this issue a bit more, and what their motivation is—if two Patriots were in the same room, would there be a way for them to connect with each other (assuming that this is a large society), for example. There were some details that were slowly brought out, such as the coin found by Day’s father (which is incorporated into a very clever manner). To be completely honest, the one thing I took away from the political scene is how cult-like the US in this book (but also irl—I’ve never seen another country where pretty much everyone has their country’s flag on their front lawn or uhhh worship? their flag).

The other minor but also major detail is the virus (or the plague, but it has to be treated with a vaccine, therefore it’s a virus). We know that there’s a plague, and of course, the poorer parts of the rEpBuLiC, such as Day’s neighbourhood, are affected heavily, but that’s pretty much the extent that we know. I wonder if Legend was written/published today (or next year, let’s say), would the plague be different—would people be wearing masks, for instance?  What are the symptoms of the plague (I think there was some coughing and fever)—how do you know for sure it’s the plague and not a common cold or the chicken pox, for example o.O I definitely felt like I was over analyzing details at times because I was able to pick up on Lu’s foreshadowing pretty early on. 

Brief comment on Lu’s foreshadowing—she is clever in the sense that sometimes the details are right in your face, but you don’t realize it until a significant event happens. Sometimes it’s a really important part of the story, other times it’s just a subtle detail, like the coin. You can tell that Lu most likely planned Legend meticulously, and I’m sure that the next two books are crafted with this precise manner. I’m sure this is the type of book that when you reread it, you can pick out all the details that were planted along the way (or maybe I’m over analyzing again).

Something else that I appreciated in this book is that, although this is dystopian, it doesn’t feel like those typical dystopian tropes are there, if that makes sense. Yes, there’s a romance (and maybe a tad of insta love), but it’s not the driving factor of the plot. And there’s no love triangle (*throws confetti*). Besides the war and thus, the division of the population, the most obvious dystopian feature is the Trial—this is when you turn 10, you must take a test (physical, mental, and an interview). Based on your score, you either get placed into highschool, university, or you’re sent to labour camps if you fail. Honestly, as messed up as the Trial is, it’s almost like a reality today. I feel like people who are just entering middle school are already set on studying medicine or law, when at that age, you should be idk enjoying life and maybe start putting effort into what you enjoy, not choosing a career. Anyways, those are my 2 cents. 

Although Legend is written from our two main characters, I love how different their dynamic was, which made the story much more interesting. From Day’s point of view, I liked that we got to see the pain he feels for his family. I also appreciated Day’s relationship with Tess, who I feel like they’re more like brother and sister (and I’m glad there isn’t a love triangle...at this point of the trilogy anyways). While Day is a criminal, he’s such a softie when it comes to the people he cares about, whereas when he’s on a ‘mission’ he’s very sly. From June’s point of view, we are introduced to Thomas (which I thought he was like a butler but oop that’s not right), Metias (her brother), and Ollie (their doggo (yes?)). At first, it seems that June is like this kick ass girl, who is super young (ish, she’s 16) and she’s a trouble-maker, but I feel like her peers respect her. One thing I noticed is that June is such a compassionate person—I’m not sure how to explain it, but she’s more “human” than Commander Jameson, for example. Her element of humanity and being able to analyze a situation/emotions within a few minutes, it was super impressive—I feel like she makes working for the Republic very easy. We only get a few glimpses of her and Metias together, but what we see is so wholesome—you can tell that Metias is scared/deeply cares for his younger sister. And there’s Thomas...from the gecko he gave me weird vibes but man he is such an icky man. Also, seeing as June is a prodigy, it’s almost like her uh ‘bosses’ (?) treat her as a prized possession, which 100% made me feel like (more on that in the spoiler section below). For once, I didn’t really mind the insta love between June and Day, though whilst I was reading the book, I was a bit frustrated because I could see exactly where the story was going (I see you, Lu, I see you).

Finally, I appreciate that Lu’s characters are people of colour, specifically Asian/asian-mixed. I obviously can’t speak on her behalf, but I’m glad that she didn’t conform to the “norm” or “default” as she is Asian-american herself. Furthermore, I think it gives younger people the encouragement that yes, you can be an author, you don’t need to be a heterosexual, cis, white male. (I’m sorry for the crappy explanation, I guess what kinda sucks is that she had to explicitly mention it in the book). ANYWAYS moving on, I appreciated this book, though I didn’t really know what to expect from it. To be completely honest, I was also scared to read it because it had been on my TBR since 2014 (oops), but I think that in the end, it’s good thing I waited to start this trilogy; I think that otherwise, this would’ve been same-old-same-old vibes to other dystopian books/trilogies I’ve read in the past. I’m excited to see where the trilogy takes us and I’m excited to see how Lu will further develop our main characters, as well as see how her writing style changes over time!

If you’ve read this book, I’d love to know what your thoughts are, did you like this book or not? (and if you’ve read the other two books, did you find that overall, the series gets better/what book is your favourite from this series?).

Thank you for reading my review, I hope you are having a legendary day (sorry, I had to), wherever you are in the world!

~ Cassandra / an-avid-reader

-

I’ve decided to include a spoiler section of my reviews; continue reading for some spoiler-y content (you have been warned)

SPOILER SECTION BELOW

While I could see it coming that June was going to betray Day, she felt so bad when she called the cops on his family. Again, this goes back to the humanity thing. The fact that she actually listened to Day (and I guess respected him?) as opposed to merely judging him for “failing” his Trial and being poor is commendable. To be honest, I’d like to think that they had mutual respect for each other, Day has his reputation, and June unexpectedly kicked Kaede’s butt in the ring. I feel like there’s so much to uncover, there’s something so fishy with their government, and I think we’re just at the tip of the iceberg. It makes me think of what other contraband exists, besides the pendent/coin. Also, side note, isn’t one presidential term = 4 years, and the Elector has been the leader/uh President for 11 terms? I don’t remember it being mentioned, but I feel like the next Elector would be his son, sort of like a dictatorship…

Speaking of the fight scene, I’m honestly surprised that June didn’t put the pieces together. When she met Day for the first time (for the cure deal), she noted his dialect/the fact that he used the cousin. We’re not told how many other people use the same slang, nor do we encounter another character (such as the older man who helped Tess and Day early on in the story), using that slang. Thus, when Day said cousin in front of June, I’m surprised that she didn’t question whether that was Day or not. Then again, I feel like she needed more hints to corroborate her hypothesis—I’m just surprised that it didn’t even cross her mind, I guess. 

June = prized possession? Aka Thomas kissing her *vomits* I assumed that Thomas was an older guy, again, like he was her butler/guardian because her parents are dead. (LIGHTBULB MOMENT - we know that the Republic just kills people, so is it possible that Day’s father is still alive? We know for sure his mom is dead because she got shot in the head by none other than T h o m a s, but maybe there’s a chance that Day’s father was still alive). I feel like June was just even more ruplused when she found out that Thomas was actually the killer of her brother; I wonder if that’s what made him so “cold”, as June referred to later on in the story. Was he brainwashed or something? Commander Jameson gives me these weird vibes, like she has a bigger role in this story, but we don’t know yet. And then during the ceremony after June caught Day, there was Chian, Metias’ mentor (most likely also a snake) who was kinda hitting on her, and then there was the Elector’s son! I’m just speechless, can these people not force themselves onto June?? If she didn’t meet Day, would she fall for one of them, or would she just live her best life (part of me hopes for the latter, all those guys are creeps).

I also find it convenient that June knew exactly what to do with the computer/with Metias’ message? Albeit, she is clever (when her judgement isn’t clouded lmao). I knew that the letters were going to be a scramble, but I would’ve never thought it would lead to a website. Also, how was Metias sure that June would read through his stuff? If he were still alive, would he have told June about what he found (ever)? And how did he get wrapped up in all of this? So many questions!! Anyways, I guess that the two of them had a similar way of going about things/thinking similar enough so that they could find clues like that without raising too much suspicion (even though June did end up getting caught towards the end). 

One of the ways that Lu was able to sneak in some foreshadowing is when we’re in Day’s POV and we learn about his older brother, John. I remember that there was something along the lines of “oh we look so similar, it would be easy to mistake one for the other” and that sort of raised suspicion for me, which was confirmed when John sacrificed himself to let June and Day (and the others) escape. I didn’t catch that Day’s pendant was a coin, however, that was really clever. I wouldn’t say that being able to spot these things early on made me dislike the book, but it did take away the element of surprise. 

Onto book #2!

[denialanderror]

Okay so this is probably going to be the most sincere post I’ve ever made (and quite possibly the last sincere post I ever make). It’s been one hell of a year but I’ve gotten to know a bunch of you, be it your posts on my dash making me laugh or having conversations about god knows what at 1am. I think it’s safe to say tumblr has taken over a huge chunk of my life (sadder words have never been said) so here’s to all of you bozos.

@imhereforbvcky​ I had to start with you. We’ve been talking for over a year now and still you put up with my shitty humour and pestering snapchats. God, you take the piss sometimes though. But I’m glad you dish out what you receive, I don’t know if we’d still be talking constantly if you didn’t. Except also fuck you because we’ve now gotten to the point where I’ll see something (ahem cereal) on Amazon and I can’t help but send it to your door. It’s an issue. But on a more serious note, 2017 has fucking kicked my ass and I think I can safely say that it would have been far far worse if I didn’t have you to rant to and support me through it all. You’re a fucking gem, Mee. And I sincerely hope 2018 is a little kinder on the both of us.

@rotisserierogers Oh kumi, you give hard ons in my heart (I’m still laughing at organ boners). I think it’s safe to say that whenever I need to Yell��� I head to you. You’re somehow the both aggressive and motivational and it’s incredible. You were one of the Big Blogs I took my head out of my ass to speak to and I haven’t looked back since. You’ve ruined my sense of humour (who the fuck am I kidding though it never made any sense) and it’s been a wild fucking ride but thank fuck for you and your shit ass sense in food (rasmalai ftw). But hoe. Please. For the safety of everyone around you. Stay away from the kitchen. Come to my house for gods sake and let me feed you just... stay away from the stove. We’ll bring our son. It’ll be great. 

@whothehellisbella​ Okay you’re a talented piece of shit and I hate you for it. But honestly, thank you for pushing me to be Extra™ whenever I can and for letting me yell about theatre! You’re a sweet little fuck but a sassy fuck and I’m so glad I can call you all the curses under the sun and you’ll just be like “no u, hoe” without batting an eye. It’s great. I think you were one of the first people I spoke to? Idk i’m getting old, either way you’re an absolute doll, you are genuinely supportive and such a kind soul and I wanna thank you for putting up with me. But also pls teach me your selfie ways i stfg I have no idea how to un-potato myself. 

@poealsobucky Oh boy. Michelle. What a fucking ride. I’m still not over how awkward my first message to you was, the fact that you still spoke to me after that mess is beyond me (fuck you Mee). But you’re one of the nicest, most understanding people I’ve met on this hellsite. You understand my insane ramblings and the motive behind my bitchy moods and you deserve so much more. I wanna thank you for letting me feel safe to message you about literally anything and everything without fear of being judged. We didn’t speak until later in the year but I adore you and your wise-beyond-your-years advice. Now go get yo’self a glass of wine, you deserve it.

@mynameisnoelle We started speaking after Michelle showed me your username and I thought “that’s so fucking smart! I love it!” Too bad you’re a dumbass irl. Okay but no, I fucking love you, Noelia. You’re literally just as insane as me and it’s magical. Thank you for letting me spam you with whatever is taking over my life on any given day and for screaming along with me about things (babies and dogs, mostly). And I swear to god girl, if I ever get to Spain, we are meeting up. 

@buckys-fossil Sam! Sweet, gorgeous Sam. First of, thank you for the lipstick good god it changed my life. And thank you for being just as excitable as me about the dumbest shit (although I’m still going to force you to read Harry Potter) and encouraging my insanity. Your videos of your dog always make my day a little brighter and I’m not even going to deny stalking your instagram, you’re hot af. I love you, peanut. 

@crappy-camel @theassetseyeliner @barnescrazy Ah yes. The Children™. You guys will send me to an early grave, I swear. Macy you’re literally insane, I am worried about your health tbh but you’re also a huge fucking softie and I wish you the best. Erin any time I see your photos I can’t help but think “how the fuck is this girl so trendy? I looked like trash when I was her age” because oh boy was that a look. Good old suppressed emo teens. And Vena you Canadian blessing. You’re freaking gorgeous but fuck you and your Twizzlers, eh? Ngl though I’m considering marrying you for that nationality ya dig?

@valhalla-ally Ally! I fucking love ya! I don’t remember how we started speaking but holy fuck, you quite literally changed my life (woo uni) and I never really thanked you for that. You’re such a hard worker and quite honestly, watching your reactions to that Loki fic was one of the highlights of my year. You’re such a kind-hearted person and you go out of your way to make sure I’m okay and help i any way you can. I love you, woman, you deserve so much more recognition. 

@meleedamage We haven’t talked much in terms of messages and shit but holy fuck, your posts have made me inappropriately laugh in public too many times. Any time I see you reblogging something from me, I prepare myself because I know it’ll be absurd, filthy and punny and I will probably have to stifle a laugh. You’ve made my dash immensely better and I wanted to thank you for making me laugh.. and yelling at me to reblog my drawing more lmao.

@soldatbarnes I’ve been such a shitty mutual when it comes to fics this year and I’m sorry but I’ll have you know, I have pretty much all of your fics saved on my tbr list because you’re insanely talented. And fucking gorgeous! I love seeing you on my dashboard and when we’ve spoken, you’ve always been such a sweetheart. Thank you for letting me ramble and forgiving me for being such a shitty reader. 

There are so many more people who’ve made my time on tumblr that much better but my laptop is about to die and I can only handle so much softness. This is unnatural. I feel weird. But to everyone I’ve spoken to this year or has made me laugh when scrolling, thank you. You make tumblr what it is and I probably would have gotten bored and left long ago if it wasn’t for you guys.

[rowan-buzzard-whitethorn]

Tag-a-palooza

Let’s play “answer all the tags at once”! This is hella long and thank you so much to all the people that tagged me I love you guys!!

 @catastrophicallyinlovewithbooks 

Bianca darling tagged me for these:

1. What is a book you have that has sentimental value to you?

Jane Eyre. It was one of the first classics I read and it made me feel all the special feelings

2. Is there a scent that reminds you of something nice?

Honeysuckle. The house I grew up in had three big honeysuckle vines and I would always go out and eat the nectar.

3. Who would you choose to be stuck in a lift with for 24h (real life person or fictional character)?

Just give me one of my daddies I’m here for this trope. Right now I’m feeling Fenrys real hard. (I mean, I want him to be real hard... okay I’m getting off topic, focus sam)

4. Do you have a lucky item?

Not that I can think of!

5. What would you order if you went to a restaurant right now?

Mmmmmm I really want some enchiladas right now.

6. What’s the most beautiful book you own?

I have a book of African art and I love it a lot

7. Walk on the beach or hike in the mountains?

HIKE!

8. What’s next on your TBR?

An Ember in the Ashes, Luna is freaking out about it

9. Favourite poem?

GOBLIN MARKET, CHRISTINA ROSSETTI. LIKE REAL HARD.

10. Who are 5 people you’d invite to dinner (real people, either dead or alive)?

Oh man I don’t know, I’m really bad at these questions. I’d sit down with a ton of different historical people so that I could learn what stuff was actually like

11. Who’s your favourite person who shares your name?

Ooooo this is a good question...even though I can’t think of anyone?? I like Samantha Bee? 

These I got tagged by my sweet belgian pastry @readinglikewildfire, thank you dear :D

1. Do you have any piercings or tattoos, what are they?

Well I used to have/ have tried a bunch of piercings. I had several cartilage, tried industrial and hated it, and I loved my nose ring, but then I had to take them all out for nursing :(((( I also have two tats so far, one off of a bible verse and the other is a Fibonacci spiral 

2. Who is your style icon?

I don’t have one! Anybody that looks like a grungy hipster hobo really

3. Are you a night shower or a morning shower person?

Morning! hate going to bed with wet hair

4. What do you study at school if you are at school? If you’re not at school what do you do instead?

International studies for the first degree, nursing for the second!

5. Do you speak multiple languages? What are they?

lol no, for my first degree I had to take a language and I took french but I dont remember shit.

6. What do you like most about where you live?

My family living here/ the food. Thats about it lol

7. Favorite piece of jewelry, why?

Hmmmm... I don’t wear too much jewelry, I have a bunch but I dont wear it often lol

8.  Whats one random fact about yourself?

I’m answering all these sitting on my back patio in my swimsuit!

9. TOG or ACOTAR?

TOG for sure!

10. Do you like fantasy books with a lot of romance or does it not really matter to you?

Yeah I do. I mean, I would say that I don’t mind if it doesn’t but the majority of the ones i’ve read have romance. I’m ashamed. lol

11. Favorite color!

I like blue, green, and purple!

These I got tagged by @fiery-feyre, thanks buddy!!!!

Are narwhals the Jedi or Unicorns of the sea to you?

I... love this question?? Totally the unicorns

Cats or dogs?

Both equally!!

Favorite fruit?

Peaches! or pears!

Favorite TV show?

I can’t pick!! Stranger things, peaky blinders, sense8, friends, etc

Headphones or earbuds?

Buds if I can find ones that fit in my ear

Favorite animal?

Elephant!

Favorite Disney song? 

The Circle of Life! You better believe I “know” all the words

Favorite cartoon from your childhood?

I liked them all! Hey Arnold, old spongebob, I loved Angry Beavers. Anyone remember that show?? lol 

Apple or Android?

Android! I say, as I type on a mac. But even it it annoying me lately.

PlayStation or Xbox?

PLAYSTATION

Do you like trains or planes better?

I like trains but I haven’t ridden one in forever!

Tagged by @seeliequeenofprythian, thank you!

Author you feel thinks the most like you?

Hmmm... I don’t know! I mean SJM and I probably think alike a little bit

Favorite emotion?

Bliss!

Favorite minor character?

Fenrys! 

Superhero (DC/Marvel) that you relate to the most?

Captain America!

What bizarre eye color would you want to have?

bright green! I mean... that’s not bizarre but you know

Favorite IRL person?

I have too many! My mom, my friends, my sisters- you know, sometimes... lol

Which language really calls to you?

French!

Sweet or savory?

Sweet! 

Innocent cinnamon roll character or complex tragic character?

Complex tragic character

What’s your favorite expression to make?

Where my eyes go different directions! I have no control over which way they go but it’s fun lol

Hogwarts house?

Gryffindor!

Tagged by the wifey Luna @lronteeth

1) Which event in history you’d want to witness if you could time travel?

hmmm... idk about event, but I would love to see all the empires in their prime. Oh and the library of alexandria. Stuff like that

2) How did you meet your best friend?

6th grade, we actually met in the cafeteria but I dont even remember it. We were assigned seats next to each other in class.

3) If you can be invisible for a day, what would you do?

This is such a trap question lol. Like, we all want to say that we would just enjoy our alone time or whatever but if invisibility lasted any longer than a day, if that long, I’m totally robbing the bank and so are you.

4) Your first kiss story

WHEN I HAVE ONE YOU WILL BE THE FIRST PERSON I TELL

5) Most embarrassing memory

probably when I pooped at a friends house and there was no toilet paper and I tried to sneak out and her whole family was out there and her mom was like “hey... wasn’t that bathroom out of tp? and you were in there for a while lol” which, looking back, was a total bitch move of her.

6) Best 3 books you’ve read this year

SIx of Crows, Queen of Shadows, The strange and beautiful sorrows of ava lavender (wait... was that this year?)

7) Worst 3 books you’ve read this year

Shatter Me series. Whoop there it is.

8) Make your basketball team out of book characters

Dude I just want all my daddies on one team, can you imagine?

9) Book trope you hate

CHILDHOOD FRIENDS MUST BE SECRETLY IN LOVE. Effing hate that trope.

10) Describe your style

Imagine Free People style but like, on a target budget. Then throw in a lack of self confidence and we’re there.

MY QUESTIONS! Let’s pick super random ones. Answer if you feel like it: @its-suriel @itsawriter @cassiancalore @dr-woodsprite!!

1. Root-beer: good or gross?

2. Pineapple on pizza: genius or madness?

3. Leader or follower?

3. Most overrated book character?

4. What is your favorite sound?

5. What got you in the most trouble as a kid?

6. If you had to pick a different name for yourself what would it be?

7. What show or movie has a family most similar to your own?

8. What is the most beautiful place you’ve ever been?

9. What is a random thing you judge people for?

10. Favorite accent?

11. Worst movie you’ve ever seen?

[sunshinetoshi]

pt 2 (just in case you wanted to be able to reply to the first one for the moodboard)

i may not simp for yamaguchi as hard as i simp for atsumu (yet) but idk maybe this will be the tipping point. like maybe i just need to see more yams content. i think the reason why i don't simp as hard (yet) is bc i would be happy with someone like him platonically and/or romantically like i'll take either (or both) so it's not quite simp territory (but vvv close) (or maybe it is, the more i write, the more i'm like OH? MAYBE?)

but tbh if they were real i probably wouldn't give atsumu the time of day based on first impressions lkajhd i'd just be like wow what a dick and move on with my life. maybe admire from a distance but i wouldn't even bother getting to know him well enough to actually like him (can you tell i've thought abt this a lot oof)

OKAY MEE but the problem is that if i go through things i've saved thinking that i'm going to delete the ones i don't really want to keep, i'll start feeling guilty about the ones i'm getting rid of bc it's not like i'm not interested at ALL so then guilt + decision fatigue hits and i keep more than i should and it stretches out into more self-imposed work bc i have more to clean up later. it's one of my goals this month to clear out my tbr folder of articles i saved to read (NOT EVEN MY FIC TBR ASDJG) bc there are ~500 and i CANNOT read all of them. (not to mention all the screenshots i have on my phone?? oh man) so uh. i hope we can clean our lives up HAHAHAH

evaporating in spite is a good move. leave him behind and text him "bitch you could have just called"

-🍁

omg part one made me choke 'i thought we were just trying to expose you' BAHAHAH even part three ajdhjssh. it was a two for one HAHA expose me and get a prize (and yesss i'll work on the moodboards this weekend <33)

THE EVOLUTION OF THE YAMS PARAGRAPH I CAN'T. we went on a JOURNEY there. i think you're already in simp territory bb he's got you hooked

tsumu!! aww ..but saaaame HAHA. rn i analyze his character and he's one of my faves like he has so much depth but on a first impression i wouldnt be down (i mean i'd think he's hot but i might be turned off at first). and then over time i'd fall for him and see he's such a sweetheart but never say anything (wait.. i just realized i've done exactly this irl i- okay)

ooo i see. yeah i know i probably won't be reading/rb ing everything in my drafts but like you said it requires time and energy to sit down and go through them. YES we'll clean up our lives and clear out our folders and drafts (i also have to clean out my closet while we're on the topic akdhsjjd 💀💀 help)

BAHAH or call his phone and be like "oh, so it does work. interesting."