#idk now im thinking ab someone whos just. full of themselves yk? a bit arrogant but they have an actual reason to be
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I need someone to obsess* over tbh
#cj rambles#* for lack of a better word. not any stalkery shit (unless theyre into that) obviously lmao#more of an infatuation i guess???#i need someone to think about. someone to occupy my mind. and someone who wont think it's too pushy or too much.#you'd think that being so devoted would guarantee feelings back. or a good relationship....#idk i need to drown someone in love and affection bc i have too much of it and its just like. pent up.#ig i want someone who is chill with that. flattered even. hell they can be crazy about me too ill get used to it. id just fall harder#idk im a bit crazy so i need someone who's a compatible form of crazy. and i guess someone who needs excess affection???#idk now im thinking ab someone whos just. full of themselves yk? a bit arrogant but they have an actual reason to be#and I'll fuel it I'll take so many pictures of you and compliment you its basically the lady gaga paparazzi dynamic#cause i cant be a star. im too shy. i need someone else to be the star in the relationship. someone to show off#and someone to be. utterly infatuated with. not an idealized version but all their stupid beautiful flaws too.#like pleaseeee i need the rush again. and getting crushes is a kind of high tbh. so ofc im gonna seek it out#I'll open every door for you give you my jacket light your cigarette cook you food make you playlists hold you like theres no tomorrow#and in return you can beat me up and call me a fag#idk maybe i sound utterly insane right now#just. very dog-like. need someone to love unconditionally and pledge my undying loyalty to yk?
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