#idk if this makes sense cus I'm tried as fuck rn
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I think the millers would have really chaotic mornings cus like in the show they had a bit of a chaotic morning already now imagine if Ellie was also there like she would probably not be a morning person Sarah is the only one who's body instinctively awakes every morning like they would probably have the most chaotic mornings Sarah waking up to Joels alarm, getting ready and waking up Joel and trying to wake up Ellie too but she's not morning person so Sarah just makes breakfast instead and lets Joel wake her up but then Tommy shows up and him and Joel start talking about work and stuff and then Sarah is like "where tf is Ellie" then Tommy goes to wake her up and successfully dose so after a good 10 minutes while Joel goes to put on his work boots, drink his coffee and orange juice (Ellie gets orange juice handed to her too) then finally they all "sit down" for breakfast which translates to Ellie sometimes just sitting on the kitchen counter instead Sarah sometimes joining her but she prefers the table and Tommy standing by the fridge stealing their food like little siblings do then they all realise shit its time to go but then get held up by the neighbours before finally making it out the house
#idk if this makes sense cus I'm tried as fuck rn#but anyways take this whatever it is#i love sarah and ellie as sisters sm#ellie williams#ellie tlou#sarah miller#sarah tlou#joel miller#joel tlou#tommy miller#tommy tlou#tlou fic#tlou#tlou show#the last of us hbo#the last of us#tlou stuff#the cowboy talks
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my brother is the current bane of my existance I cannot wait to get out of this fucking house I'm in. or until he leaves. idk I just want him away from me rn.
(all you/yours/etc are directed at my brother)
our dad already got onto me about it so why the fuck did you even have to say smth. plus you don't get to fucking talk to me about being rude when you used to scream at everyone at the top of your fucking lungs unapologetically. "don't talk to him like that" you don't get to talk to me about how to be nice and respectful to him when you have only ever been rude to me.
"serious talk for a second, I'm mad at you" and ive been mad at you for four years now!! I guess we're all pissed off, right???? yk cus you've only ever been rude to me and tried to fucking control me.
wasnt even trying to be rude, either. I just stood up for myself and both you and our father are used to me being a fuckign doormat. you have never been able to handle me standing up for myself. "why don't you stand up for yourself?" "tell them how you want things to be!" its almost like you guys have taught me that enforcing boundaries and telling people how I want things to be makes me rude and unlikeable. me being a people pleaser, a doormat? that's your fault. you taught me that. you taught me that I would be scolded if I stood up for myself and, boom, here's just another batch of proof.
"the way you talked to him rly upsets me" honest to fukcing prime above, I do not care. the way you talk to me has upset me my entire fucking life. plus, we both know our father doesn't deserve my respect or yours. and you don't deserve my respect either. he doesn't have the title 'father' because I respect him, he has it because I am genetically bound to him. with the conversations with our sister that have been hapening, I thought you saw it the same way.
oh and prime fucking knows that if I talked to you about this you'd probably just say you don't remember the interaction at all!
also why the fuck did you have to talk to me before theater. because if I cant keep myself from breaking down now how the fuck am I supposed to get through 3-4 hours in an overwhelming enviornment without breaking down again. I thought it was common fuckign sense to not do that kind of shit before an event.
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9, 11, 30, 33, for the ask thingy (bonus 13 cus im struggling with writers block rn and it sucks)
- random anon
hello random anon!! thanks for the ask 💜 as expected, i rambled. i would say sorry but i literally knew this was going to happen. so. i hope you wanted detailed answers...
9. Least favorite trope to write.
this is a hard one! i can't think of any that i actively dislike, but ig...enemies to lovers?? i LOVE reading it, but every time i've tried writing it, it turns out horrible and i never post. so. maybe i'm just too soft for that trope, idk, but its hard to write. thats literally all i can think of-
11. Describe your writing process from scratch to finish.
well. i doubt any of this will make any sense, but lets dive into the terrifying depths of my Writer Brain anyway...
most times, fics start with An Idea. its usually just a random thought i've had, which could be anything from an outfit i would love to see a character wear to the Deepest Darkest Feelings of a certain canon moment - it's varied and fucking wild - and then, i just think. for a few days or weeks maybe, depending on how long i intend the fic to be, i have this fic idea growing in the back of my mind as i start to build up the beginning of a plot, and i outline some goals and things i want to achieve when i write this fic. (i picture it as a little timeline running of into the distance with tags stuck on the Important Plot Points, with relevant words and images, but that's just me. its weird, i know, bare with me.)
once The Idea is settled and some semblance of a plot has been mentally sketched out, i open a doc and just start writing. for longer fics, i may keep a doc for planning - writing down scenes that are in my mind, or random visuals and lines that i think of, and sometimes even song lyrics that i find inspiring for the fic, etc - but for shorter fics, i just dive right in and get writing.
(sidenote: i've found that the process is different for longer fics vs shorter fics. obviously. theres a lotttt more planning for long fics, and i usually end up making a playlist and a pinterest board for them to keep the ideas coming as i write. short fics usually get smashed out in a few hours, probably at midnight, then i edit a little and post. im kinda lazy with editing and rewriting tho. rip.)
now, we come to the writing itself. i like to set aside a fair amount of time for writing, like, i dont just randomly write a line every now and then - i make time for me to sit down for a hour or however long i've got, and focus on writing. i follow the hazy map of plot points in my mind, and i fill in the blanks as i go. if im completely honest, i dont plan a lot of shit. i just blurt words and sometimes it comes out nicely.
i think that pretty much covers it. other than obsessively editing and rereading over the long fics, or scanning the shorter ones a little, i post it and move on <3
30. Favorite line you’ve ever written.
oh god. this is...hard. ill just throw some random lines in without context or explanation bc im crazy. here goes-
- He tries to muster some kind of smile in response as he tugs his headphones down around his neck, Led Zeppelin blasting out the speakers freely now, but he must fail terribly because Calum’s smile slips from his face, just like the batter that drips from the spoon he’s holding, landing in the mixing bowl underneath. It melts smoothly into the rest of the mixture and disappears, and Luke stares at where it landed, wishing he could bring it back. (x)
- Luke’s lingering hand tangles back in Calum’s hair. Soft strands of it threading through his fingers and Calum’s eyes fluttering shut like a butterfly’s wings, then gently pushing his head up into Luke's hand as he rolls over a little more, searching for just a little more of the warmth of Luke’s body against his. (x)
- And he’s gone. But she’s still there. The world has suddenly and violently stopped spinning, but she’s still there, smiling at painting in her mind, of a spinning girl. (x)
- He opened his eyes, and for a second, the silhouette of a boy still stood in front on him, a spark in his eyes and hope in every breath. Wishing for a bright future, planning for great and marvelous things that would never come to pass. (x)
33. Do you listen to music when you’re writing?
as a general rule, yes. i like blocking out the rest of the world and listening to music that fits the fic im writing, because music is always my biggest inspiration. for many fics, especially longer ones, ill make a playlist that suits the vibes which i can then listen to whenever i write that fic. but sometimes i write without music just so i can focus better, and not be distracted by the music, which helps me make more conscious word choices and structural/grammatical choices too.
13. How do you deal with writers block?
ahh writers block (derogatory). sigh. honestly, i dont think there is a cure for writers block, but staying open to inspirations is one suggestion i can offer. listening to music, watching the world around you, consuming media you enjoy...all that helps your mind take in ideas, and even if you can't seem to write anything out, it's good to keep your mind open and filled with something. and with writers block, i would say to NOT make yourself write if you dont feel like it. that takes the enjoyment out of it and makes it seem like a task you have to complete, which it isn't!! writing is here for you to have fun!! you just have to wait it out until you want to write again, and in the meantime, take in all the inspiration that you can.
thank you sm for asking all this, i had a lot of fun writing these answers out! and i hope your writers block doesn't last long too. sending good vibes your way!!! 💜💜💜
writers ask game
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8, 9, 16, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 25, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 34, 35, 36, 40, 41, 42, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 50, 53, 55, 57, 58, 59, 62, 64, 65, 70 (aside from Kagami 😂), 71, 72, 79, 82, 86, 87, 90, 91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99 for the "Asks, why not" thing please? (Omg that's soo much, I'm sorry I got carried away ^^')
8) Your looks (add a picture or describe yourself)
Average height, bordering on short. Broad shoulders, thick arms and thighs, square face, slightly projecting ears (one pierced, one with a stretched lobe), bushy arched brows, thick square glasses, faded dark red hair, dark brown eyes, butt chin. I look pale and perpetually sleep deprived.
9) What do you/did you study?
I was in a teacher’s training program for English and Hungarian language and literature, and I’m planning to go back to school to study sociology!
16) What do you look for in a SO?
Consciously: understanding, fun, sweet, kind and accepting. Unconsciously: somewhat broken and in dire need of emotional help which I’m desperate to provide lmao.
19) Do you prefer serious and meaningful relationships or casual dating/one night stands?
Eh, u know, it depends? I don’t think I’m fit for a serious relationship right now, so I’d prefer casual stuff atm, but on the long run I do want a partner to share my life with.
20) What are your deal breakers?
Really obnoxious people, ignorance and bigotry I guess. And I’m not keen on someone pushing or disrespecting my boundaries, either.
21) How was your day?
It was good!! My bro, his girlfriend and my friend tagged along to get our (me and my soon-to-be sis-in-law’s) ears pierced, and then my friend and I got a loot of food. I didn’t exactly feel good enough abt myself to be comfortable outside, but I got a lot of random kindness and that was Nice.
22) Favourite food & drink
Food: teriyaki chicken and seafood pasta, drink: ginger ale and iced coffee
23) What position do you sleep in?
I sleep half-curled up on my side, but I need to toss and turn a little until I find The Best Position.
25) Your fears
The dark, needles, rabbits (I don’t even know, dude), the fact that I’ll die without having made an impact on the world, being spoken about behind my back, being a bad influence on my friends.
28) Any pets?
Not right now! I used to have two rottweilers around the house growing up, but they both passed away sadly.
29) What are your hobbies?
Writing, sketching, basketball, getting on people’s nerves, researching typology, watchin movies idk?
31) What was your last awkward situation?
Asjhdh the ticket control guy told me to “Have a safe trip” and I said “You too!”. This rarely happens to me tho
32) What is your last regret?
Not holding my friend’s hand on public transport. It was…right…there….and she already told me she’s more than comfortable with physical touch! I’m a fool! Everyone thinks I hate touching but I don’t! I’m just shy!
34) Do you believe in astrological stuff? (Zodiac, tarot, etc.)
Ehh. Kind of? As for believing, I believe more in ghosts, but I do see some patterns in different signs. I just try not to let it affect the way I see/interact with a person, because no one deserves to be prejudiced for whatever reason, especially not their date of birth. Tarot is just fun, and the cards r cool
35) Have any quirks?
I bite the skin on my fingers, scratch my acne, make my knees jump… most of it is just regular anxiety stuff tho so idk?? I do think I’m quirky, but there’s just too much weird stuff to list ‘em.
36) Your pet peeves
Cig/booze stink on a person, customers being rude, bigotry, interrupting other people… There’s quite some things that annoy me asjdgd
40) Last 5 things from your search history
Boku No Hero Academia, Hawks, duck emoji, Grumman fma, How To Train Your Dragon
41) What’s your device backgrounds?
My phone lockscreen rn is a beautiful KagaKuro fanart of them standing in the rain in yukatas, Kagami looming over Kuroko and shielding him from the rain and Kuroko reaching up to stroke his face; my phone background is an art of they/them pronouns tattooed on someone’s knuckles, their posture unsure; my laptop background is a screenshot from the movie Déva, of blue skies and a street lamp.
42) What do you daydream about?
…cu..cuddling,,my…crush……..
44) What's your religion/Your thought about religion
Short version: barf
Long version: I was raised catholic (even tho I was never baptized), and attended catholic school for 8 years which gave me a really warped idea of Christianity, Which made me a cynic & an agnostic or atheist by proxy. I harshly criticize the catholic church and faith but sometimes… when I do feel hopeless I get down on my knees and pray, so I guess if I let myself find my own faith I’d be a believer. But right now, I’m good just existing in my nihilistic bubble
45) Your personality type
Needy imeanwhat. In a typological sense, I’m an INFP in Myers-Briggs, 4 core 5 wing in Enneagram, melancholic or sanguine in the temperaments, et cetera. Basically I’m a sad daydreamer with unresolved issues and a need to do Art
47) Are you happy with your current life?
Nah bro. I like my friends and my workplace but I’d like to move out of home ASAP. I’d also… like to get therapy before I go and put myself out there.
48) Some things you've tried in your life
Playing the guitar, hostess work, weed, cigarettes, being blackout drunk, smoking from a hookah, cooking, football, handball, basketball, volleyball, cycling, sailing, driving, hitchhiking long distances, folk dancing, one-night stands, long-distance relationships, helping people in need…
50) Favourite colour to wear?
Olive green, midnight/navy blue, white, grey and black.
53) If you could change/add something to your appearance - impossible or not - what would it be?
I’d… like to know how it would feel if I had a flat chest and a penis? I also want bigger Guns, and Abs, some more tattoos and maybe an eyebrow piercing.
55) Do you get complimented often?
I think so? I usually brush off compliments uhhh but yeah maybe! Maybe idk
58) Songs you're currently obsessed with?
My friend’s playlist reminded me that ‘Phenomenon’ by Thousand Foot Krutch exists. I’m also really into ‘San Francisco’ by The Mowgli’s atm and ‘Golden Time Lover’ by Sukima Switch!
59) Song you normally wouldn't admit you like.
I mean, it’s not like it’s cringe or anything, I hate cringe culture BUT. I do have Ariana Grande’s ‘Side to Side’ stuck in my head rn
64) Can you sing or play any instruments?
I can sing pretty badly, play a bad tune on my guitar, drum on the edge of my table, so- Nah not really asdh
65) Do you like karaoke?
YES VERY MUCH I live and die for karaoke, last time I did it in front of an audience we sung the Shaman King opening at an anime con with friends, it was Rad
70) Your fictional crush/es
AH NO FUN Kagami’s my number one,,, let’s see then: Aomine, Roy Mustang, Kise, Mikoto Suoh, Hotch & Reid from Criminal Minds, Yagami Light, Jaime Lannister and Brienne from GoT, Rustin Cohle from True Detective, Shizuo Heiwajima from Durarara!!!, why is this list full of men I didn’t think I liked men this much
71) Which fictional character is you?
Eddie Brock from Venom I mean? He’s a whole ass mess.
79) How much time do you spend on the internet?
Yike. More than I’d be proud of.
86) Would you use death note, if you had one?
No way dude. I don’t fuck with that shit, karma would fuck me right back.
87) What changes would you make in the world, no matter how impossible, if you had the power to?
I’d eliminate money and power and just make it a huge peaceful hippie community or something idk
90) What would you want to happen to you after your death?
Donate me to a medical school I don’t care. Make use of me! I’m gonna be dead, I won’t have any more feelings left to be hurt or anything asdghdsg
91) If you had to change your name, what would be your pick?
I’ve had a name in mind that I tried out once, but it didn’t really work out for me after all. I’m fine with Vee and Vic rn. Anything that isn’t my given name. I do want to change my surname to my mother’s, but if I do that I also want to give myself a different first name, and since That isn’t figured out yet, I’m just?? Call me whatever dude
94) Write 3 things about yourself - only one of them must be true
Ugh, I’m bad at these. 1) I have plenty of moles. 2) My eyesight is pretty good. 3) I’ve broken some bones before.
95) Cold or hot?
Cold in beverage, hot in weather.
96) Be a hero or be a villain?
Being a villain is way too much fun, but I have too strong of a conscience to pull that off, so… hero, I guess.
97) Sing everything you want to say or rhyme?
Asjhdf singing is funnier and more annoying, since I Cannot Sing
98) Shapeshifting or controlling time?
Dude I’m non-binary. Shapeshifting for Sure
99) Be immortal or be immune to everything aside from natural death?
Aight I’ll give in – I agree to immortality Just This Once.
#this was LONG as FUK#ask and i shall answer#i kindly skipped those i've already answered ^^'#thank u buddy!!!#meiyanaalexia#i didn't think i'd get too real with this but here i am
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