#idk if these are technically official or not but they were on several different sites

[shih-coulda-had-it]

my hero academia s6e8 (or episode 121, depends on how you count) thoughts on the gran torino scene, and how it’s different from ch 281

(tl;dr: The official manga translation offered more nuance than the anime subtitles I saw on my streaming site of choice, and if Nana really did say, “I never had any children. Not ever, Sorahiko. I am childless,” then I hope the Inko Shimura theorists have a very good day.)

//

what’s fascinating about the anime adaptation is that it finally gives context as to WHO is really speaking, and whether it’s out loud or an internal voice. so, for starters, when reading 281 i didn’t think that Gran Torino’s analysis (’Todoroki’s packing less fire now...’) extended to the next, ‘This one’s also seen better days! He’s pushing past his limits to keep fighting!’

og interpretation was that it was Shigaraki’s narration re:Torino (see me, completely glossing over the ‘also’, d’oh); this is technically a back-to-back fight for Torino, after the hospital raid. and, of course, Gran Torino is the oldest hero present. so he’s seen ‘better days.’

(honestly? a similar layered interpretation of the text/visual happened earlier, when Izuku was talking about how their first priority is to protect ‘the teacher who’s watched over us this whole time’, and OBVIOUSLY he means Aizawa, but with Gran Torino in frame, you could read it as applying to him too! [and the fact that it didn’t... Izuku you unfilial disciple hahaha])

//

subtitle translations vs caleb’s translations: who’s right? idk!

[caleb’s: “What a face... Shimura!”

subs: “How did he turn into this thing, Shimura?”]

i have Tea with this difference. when you first read the official manga translation, the words are superimposed over a frame of Shigaraki’s manic glee (which, uh, clap clap screencap redrawers, every Shigaraki frame is a base for a Nana shot). if you read this manga with Severe Projection, you can interpret this as Gran Torino seeing his sworn friend’s expression on his sworn enemy’s, thus why the flashback kicks in.

(i’m just saying, i think a strong memory for Gran Torino is him getting pinned by Nana and staring up at her triumphant grin, hair falling out of its half up-do.)

now the anime subtitles... ohhhh. okay. it’s strong evidence for Gran Torino’s no-mercy attitude towards Shigaraki. he’s seeing Shigaraki as a thing, not a person. but it’s very heavy handed!!

if Gran Torino was going to have the flashback, I would rather it be jolted free because Shigaraki reminded Torino of Nana on one of her worst days, not because he’s scrabbling to connect cause-and-effects.

//

ach, the scene. the SCENE. WITH THE AUDIO ADDED. it unfortunately did not receive any additional animation shots, but i’m satisfied with the render. now, the script. the script i am bothered by.

[caleb’s --

Nana: I tinkered with the family records [Koseki] to keep him off the trail. Because if he were to ever learn of Kotarou... he’d be sure to exploit our connection. And so, I have no son. I never did. Sorahiko, I have no son...

subs --

Nana: The ID has been altered, no one can trace it. If he learned about Kotarou’s existence, he’d use it for his bidding. I never had any children. Not ever, Sorahiko. I am childless.]

the manga translation is pretty straightforward, and others have commented on the difficulty Nana must have faced in illegally tampering with those records, so I’m just going to comment on the subtitles.

ahem. WHAT. does it really translate like this?? this is food for the Inko Shimura theorists!! plural, children? PLURAL, CHILDREN? i feel like this takes away from the significance of it being KOTAROU who was fostered! and then when Nana says “I never had any children”, that’s the moment they choose for Gran Torino’s head to turn!! what the fuck!!

i think Bones also missed an opportunity for Nana’s VA’s voice to break when saying “I have no son” or “I am childless”. it’s evident in the manga speech bubble that Nana is STRUGGLING to maintain her composure by this point, and THAT is what gets Gran Torino’s attention, what makes him attempt to offer comfort to his friend. >:,(

//

last difference before Gran Torino gets absolutely bodied in HD,

[caleb’s --

Sorahiko: Shimura... the decision we made... was it...

subs --

Sorahiko: Shimura, our decision back then...]

i don’t have any beef here, since ‘the decision we made’ and ‘our decision’ are essentially the same thing, but in the manga translation, Gran Torino is more or less teetering on the point of remorse (and landing firmly on, ‘ah man, we gotta make the kill shot now’). the anime... I think you can hear it? It’s very choked out.

[arosnowflake]

So ive been questioning whether or not im aro. I used to ID as panro but ive been soul searching lately as well as entering the dating world a bit and i just dont know. I think i might be quiroromantic? Any advice for trying to figure this out? Thanks

Aaalright, so it’s been a while since I was questioning, so I’m a bit out of the loop on this front, but I’ll do my best to direct you to some resources.

@aromantic-official is pretty much aro central, and they have a resource page that includes resources for questioning aros and a glossary of aro terms, which should be a decent start. Their questioning tag also contains a variety of posts that are aimed at questioning aros; I haven’t gone through all of them, but it’s hard to imagine that there won’t be at least one that’s a little helpful.

@anagnori also has a very extensive resource page (although some may be out of date; I haven’t checked all of them), and also wrote this post aimed at questioning aros. 

AUREA is a fairly new website/organization dedicated to aromantics, and it has a resource page (again, haven’t checked all the links, but since the site is new, they should at least be up to date)

For quoiromanticism specifically, this post is a good 101 introduction (idk how relevant that is to you, but I feel contractually obligated to include it). The coiner of the term is @epochryphal, who has a quoi tag that is likely to include relevant info. @shades-of-grayro is a good blog for everyone on with a grayro identity (’grayromantic’ is both a specific identity and an umbrella term), and while they don’t seem to have a consistent quoi tag, the quoiromantic search on their blog yields good results. I don’t follow any quoiro blogs, but a quick search turns up @quoisitively-queer, who I’ve seen around (idk how active they are though), and although it’s not especially relevant, I remember @official-quoisexual from when I was questioning whether I was quoisexual, and although the blog is dedicated towards quoisexuality rather than quoiromanticism, and since the quoi community is small, ze might still be able to help you find more specific resources.

Some other aro blogs I recommend (note: I don’t follow everyone on this list, but they’re all good blogs as far as I know):

@aro-neir-o (lots of research)

@aroworlds​ and the creator’s other blog @alloaroworlds; the first is a blog centering around aro creativity, and the second is an allo aro community blog. 

@fandomshateaspecs (community blog, run by a variety of mods)

@biaroace (coiner of the ‘oriented aroace’ term)

@black-aros and the creator’s other aro blog @official-angledaroace; coined the term ‘angled aroace’, which the second is a community blog for, and the first is a blog centering around black aros.

@aro-soulmate-project (originally a blog for deconstructing the soulmate trope, still pretty vocal about this, but has turned into more of a general aro blog with good posts)

@aroarolibrary

@aroacepagans

and uuhh definitely a whole lot more but my brain is blanking at the moment, if you’re an aro blog feel free to like or reblog or reply to this post to make yourself known! I strongly recommend speaking to arospecs directly about your doubts/questions; often, personal conversation can help clear things up in a way that resource posts just can’t. Getting involved in the community can also help; while there’s no guarantee of this, personally, that’s what made me feel secure in my identity.

On a personal questioning note: I can only speak from personal experience as an aromantic with no romantic attraction whatsoever, as well as someone who was lucky enough to have a fairly stereotypical aro experience and get through questioning relatively easily (and with no internalized issues around the aromanticism), but the biggest issue that I found in my aro questioning journey was that the aro label felt so final and definitive, when the aro identity, by nature, is hard to figure out/’prove’ because you can’t prove a negative. I can’t prove that I will never experience romantic attraction; it’s entirely possible that I will, in the future. Hell, I can’t even really prove that I haven’t in the past; there were several instances where I very well might’ve gotten genuine crushes. 

But ultimately? Being aro made me happy. The idea of being aro was appealing in a way that being romantically attracted to people/dating never was. For me, at least, being aro is honestly more about making the choice to reject society’s planned romantic path than about the certainty that I will never experience romantic attraction; I feel no desire to ever experience it, the instances in the past that might’ve been romantic attraction annoyed me immensely, and the aro community and the aro label make me happy in a way that I never was when I didn’t have those. I might experience romantic attraction in the future. I might have experienced it in the past. But, ultimately, I cannot relate to the alloromantic experience at all, so either way, I’m somewhere on the aro spectrum, and the ‘aromantic’ identity makes me feel happy, so I’m using it and you physically cannot stop me.

(Obviously, this isn’t a universal experience: many aro people still have the desire to date/marry/have a romantic relationship, many aro people still experience some form of romantic attraction, many aro people may struggle with internalized self hate due to being aromantic or mourn the loss of their pre-planned romantic lifepath, or experience being aromantic in a completely different way. This is just my personal experience, and I wish I’d heard it when I was questioning, so I try to tell it to questioning aros now that I have the chance to do so.)

So, to close, I’ll repeat the same thing I always say to questioning people: ultimately, it’s more important that you’re happy with a label than that it fits. If identifying as aromantic, quoiromantic, or any other arospec identity makes you feel right, happy, or gives you the language to talk about your experiences in a way that you currently can’t, then you shouldn’t worry too much about whether or not the label technically fits, honestly. If IDing as panromantic makes you happy and accurately gives you language to talk about your experiences/describe your feelings, then there may be no need to ID as arospec, even if you fit the definitions. But if IDing as arospec makes you happy or helps you in any way, you can always start IDing as such, even if you’re not sure, don’t entirely fit the definitions, or if you later change your label. 

[canaryatlaw]

alright. well today was.....the first day of the bar exam. Don’t know if I have any better description than that. it was something alright. I woke up to my alarm (which I had set to the Mean Girls song I’ve been using as my pump up song but starts with just Kevin screaming “Yo Yo Mathletes!!”) and did get myself out of bed, I was planning to leave at 6:15 so I had plenty of time to get ready. So I brushed my teeth and changed, they said to dress in layers because the exam rooms might be hot or cold (spoiler alert, it was FREEZING), so I picked a tank top and leggings with a zip up hoodie if needed. The email they sent (they people the people from my school who are trying to get us to pass the bar) yesterday said that when you wake up read a book or something (but no outlines) for 10 minutes to wake up your brain, or something like that, so I read the little local Chicago magazine that they keep in hotels saying all the cool things to do in Chicago this summer. I made the microwave minute muffin that I was telling you all about last night, but I was super careful to stir it all the way so there were no unmoistened bits and it was a wonderful double chocolatey muffin experience that I was very pleased with, and then ate a granola bar for good measure because you know, good breakfasts. when it was like 6:15 I headed downstairs where there were several other law students (recognizable because of the plastic bags we all had with our computers inside them) were all waiting and got in an uber, I thought of maybe sharing with some of them but there are like 3 different test sites all in this area so idk where they all were going. And in this area I mean these are the only sites for all of Chicago (and potentially all of Illinois? don’t quote me on that but that might’ve been the case) and there were a ton of kids from other law schools around, mostly recognizable because they were all wearing stuff from their school which I apparently did not think to do, but oh well. I arrived there around 6:20 (it was a really short ride obviously, that was the point) and got out of the uber to see my bus orgs professor standing there looking slightly confused, and he saw me so I said hi and he said that a group of them were supposed to be here greeting us (which was also in the email from yesterday) and that he had been told to get there at 6:15 but he was now the only person present, which sounded familiar to me always be the on time person. But we chatted a little which was nice, I hadn’t really seen him since the class ended in the fall, and despite me finding bus orgs terribly boring I did rather enjoy him as a professor. So the doors were opening at 6:30, so a bunch of us were just kinda milling around in front of the building. It was on one of the college campuses around here (it’s U of Illinois Chicago) in a building called the “forum” which apparently has large rooms in it where a lot of people can sit for tests. So they open the doors at 6:30, there are metal detectors directly after the doors, and they were checking bags as well. I’m not sure if metal detectors would find the kind of contraband they were actually looking for (like I’m sure it’s good to know there aren’t any guns too, but nobody’s really concerned about sneaking a gun into the bar exam), they were more focused on keeping all electronics out of the room, which is understandable. I still have had my period today but very little cramping, so I didn’t need to use the thingy that I stowed in my bag anyway but wouldn't have been able to use during the test because technically it’s an electronic. But we got through the metal detectors and were directed to tables where we showed them our photo IDs and they gave us our photo name badges which we then had to wear for always the rest of the test. I have the world’s worst photo of me on mine, but it’s technically my fault because I’m the one who uploaded it, but in my defense it was like, two hours before the window for submitting your application was gonna close and like 10 o clock at night so I just took a photo of my unmake-uped face against my white wall without me smiling like they wanted and surprise surprise, it looks terrible, but oh well I’m over it. We then got shown the room where we could leave our stuff we couldn’t bring into the test room, which was pretty much everything. I was using my black legends drawstring bag that we got in Florida, so I left my phone, the charger I brought with me and the external battery (because I’m prepared) along with some food and a gatorade, plus a few other things. The only things we could take into the room were our laptops and chargers, then in a little ziplock bag you could have your photo id, cash/credit card, transportation card, keys, pads and earplugs. We all had giant ziplock bags (the 2 1/2 gallon ones) to carry our laptops and chargers in because that’s what they told us to get. So we got into the test room with our little bags and computers. I found my seat all the way in the front right corner, and this room is BIG, like best estimate there were maybe 2,000 people? You didn’t really see it until everyone went to leave and it was like impossible to get through the doors and then you’re like oh wow, there’s a lot of people here. But I was in the second row, third seat in from the right wall, so pretty much on the edge, but hey it’s fine we got a perfect view of the guy at the podium who was legit right in front of us. They had the two big screens down both displaying a “clock” tab with the time counting up by seconds. In the instructions it had said if we were mac users who didn’t have a usb port you could bring your little converter thing, so I took mine with me just in case, but didn’t think I would need it. I got to the instructions they had on the tables for the computers and it had this whole thing about no usb’s or data transferring devices and I was like shit am I gonna get in trouble for this? So I took it to the proctors right in front and said it said in the instructions that I could bring it but idk if it qualifies under these rules. They both pretty much looked at me like they had no idea what I was talking about, probably because they didn’t understand what the thing actually did, but recommended I go on to the tech people, who I asked and they said oh yeah that’s fine, the other’s just don’t understand how to use things lol so that was solved. I didn’t think I’d need it, I just didn’t want to get in trouble for having it. So I sat down and logged onto my computer, got the exam stuff up and waited. There was this stuff on the program saying if you didn’t have wifi access you’d have to wait to upload your exam answers to later and I was like well that sounds perturbing so I checked if we could get wifi and that was a big nope, so that was a nice little anxiety inducer. Waited for a while, more people came, I think we officially started at either 8:30 or 9, I don’t remember exactly. First was the “Illinois Essay Exam” which is the only part of the test that is completely unique to Illinois, the other portions are all used by other states (most states have switched to what they call the Uniform Bar Exam which has reciprocity across most states, but Illinois isn’t switching until next July [boo], so we instead had pieces of the UBE but not the whole thing). I was a bit nervous about this part because a lot of it depended on knowing where Illinois law differed from the majority law you would otherwise learn, and there was the potential to be hit with some questions from the really fringe subjects like personal property that you know I had a 2 hour lecture on and that was it, so I was glad to see it was mostly mainline stuff, so that wasn’t bad. 90 minutes for that, 3 essays, not bad. After that we switched into the Multistate Performance Test that most other states use as well, and it’s a closed packet of info from which you need to draw up some sort of legal document based on the facts and laws inclosed. I had thought this would probably be the easiest part for me because given all the info I can write stuff no problem, and it definitely wasn’t hard, but it was.....odd. Not like any of the practice ones I’ve done, it was about drafting language for the articles of incorporation of this rugby league and dealing with a bunch of corporate stuff that seemed really easy, like stupid easy? So either I did really well or I totally fucked it up, but I’m fairly certain it was the first lol, so that was a relief, even though the nerdy side of me was like awww now I don’t get to write a long essay that I’m really good at writing, but that’s really okay. We breaked for lunch, I saw a few of my friends briefly but then got separated from them. The deal was that the school was going to bring us lunches, and they were set up somewhere for us to get to. When we left the building there were like 3 other schools set up with their lunches right there but ours weren’t, so I was trying to follow the directions to the spot they said in the email but it was not going well and I could tell I was just getting lost, and I was like fuck it I’ll just get some food from the popeye’s that’s right here, except it all got fucked up and was spicy and I couldn’t eat any of it except the biscuit, so basically lunch was a massive failure on multiple levels, but I had some pretzels in my bag so I wasn’t starving. Got back in and ready to go, the afternoon was the Multistate Essay Exam (don’t you love all these titles?) which was similar to the Illinois one but based on federal/majority law. It still had the opportunity to get into some fringe subjects though. it was 3 hours, 6 essays, so same odds as before. It can be hard for me to tell how well I actually did coming out of a test like that because I’m really good at bs-ing and I know it, so if I can come up with some good bs my mind thinks it’s all good when it could actually not be, but whatever. The first one was a con law question that was about marijuana of course, but was kind of on an odd basis, but I think I got the law part right so that was good. There was one about a corporation where I got to use my favorite line of the day “....because things that do not exist cannot enter into business deals” and one regarding trusts that was probably the biggest fringe subject, but I spent the last few days going over trusts (for like, the first time, but still) so the rules were fairly fresh in my mind and I think I got all of the intricacies of it right. There was one question that was just like straight evidence questions, and like those are my jam, so I get typing and I’m going and going and- oh wait, I hit the character limit and I didn’t even start the third prompt within the question yet. WHOOPS. The character limit was 4600, which really is not very much, so I had to go back and remove the bs I wrote in the first two prompts, just because I knew I could write it, and then wrote my third answer and had to move some more stuff around and delete some more bs, but I ended up with a final product that was exactly 4599 characters, which is really a masterpiece, so I was like alright perfect I’m not touching it from here lol. I ended up finishing with about 20 minutes left, so I read over a few of them and made minor changes, just details and such. Then we were done and had to wait for them to collect all the papers and then account for all of them before we could get released, then of course I had to make it through the massive crowd just to get outside. I did get outside and got an uber to my hotel room because I had to go there for wifi to upload my friggin exam answers, and let me tell you guys, this was the most anxiety inducing thing, because when you click submit on the test it will try to upload the answers but then see you don’t have wifi and be like oh it failed and the proctors are just like “yeah just go home and when you get wifi open the program and it’ll upload the answers” and I’m just like.....you couldn’t have just let us into the wifi you already have set up in this building??? Like do you know how much anxiety this process is going to give me?? The proctor said to make sure we hold onto our laptops as in the previous year someone had actually left theirs on a Chicago public transit bus which was like oH GOD WHY level nightmare, so I was making sure that didn’t happen. The uber took a while to get there because it was rush hour and there was traffic, and while I had been taking the afternoon part of the test I was like I’m gonna get out and text Jess and bug her until she agrees to go get food with me, then when I turned my phone back on and opened twitter I already had a message from her being like I can’t wait till Thursday morning like we originally said I need to see you and get food after the test tomorrow and I was just like bitch come get food with me now which she readily agreed to, which was easier than I expected lol. The uber finally came, I got to my hotel and logged onto wifi so the exam answers would upload, and legit right after they did that I switched a few things out of my bags and then headed back out. I walked a few blocks to the train that’s nearby, it’s the same stop as my church so I was familiar, and took that to the red line and then up to where we had agreed to meet because Jess wanted to take me to her spy restaurant which is really the only restaurant she knows in the city of Chicago (and now that I wrote that she’s probably going to wind up reading it even though she never reads these posts) and we definitely did not get lost getting there, that did not happen, but we did get there and it was cool, you just enter this random door on a building and it brings you to this little entry way where you have to say the “password” and get confirmed, then the wall opens and there are stairs down to the actual restaurant, which was pretty cool, outfitted with a lot of spy and James Bond stuff. We ended up just getting a table by the bar because it was kind of crowded, so we just chilled and she told me literally everything that happened at SDCC this weekend which, let me tell you, was a trip, then we decided we’d split an appetizer of cheese curds, then we were both gonna order the grilled cheese that also contains cheese curds because we are 100% those people lol. The service was kinda slow but I didn’t really care because we were talking and have fun, but of course those are Jess’ stories to tell so I won’t spoil any of them here other than saying she had a ridiculously awesome time, even if it had some stressful moments with stupid security guards. We eventually finished and paid, then ran around the restaurant checking out the rest of the spy stuff and hitting random buttons that caused different things to happen which was pretty cool, then to get out you had to put a dollar in a payphone which would then ring and give you a code which you had to enter, and then the wall would open which led to this staircase down and then up again that was covered with the little name tags they give you to write your “spy name” on, and then when you get to the door you come out in the lobby of this random hotel that’s like, a fully functional hotel, so that was pretty fun. We eventually figured out how to get to the train (read: I wasn’t navigating and Jess only got lost a little bit this time) and we decided to save ice cream for tomorrow even though I wanted ice cream now, because I was also full of cheese curds and other types of cheese. So I got on the red line and then switched to the blue line, then got off and walked the rest of the bit back to the hotel. While walking back my parents called, just wanted to check in so I told them everything and they seemed pretty happy about all of it, so that was good. Since we did all the essays today tomorrow is just going to be the multiple choice questions, 200 of them in two sessions of three hours each, 100 per session. They’re all hypos though so they take a while to answer and the supposed time allotment for each question is 1.8 minutes, so it’s a solid amount of work I’d say. It was like 9:15 by the time I got back and I desperately needed to shower because I hadn't since Monday morning because I didn’t want to have to wake up even earlier this morning to do it, so I got in the shower and changed into my pajamas, watched tv and did internet stuff for a bit before figuring I still had to get up pretty early, though an hour later than today, so that’s an improvement, so I’d better start writing this post and that’s what I did. Of course it took longer than usual because I end up being incredibly detailed about days like today even when I don’t consciously think to do it. Oh well. And now I’m here, it’s almost midnight, and I need to wake up at 6:30 am, so I’m gonna take all of those as reasons why it’s time for me to go to bed now. Goodnight babes. Stay magical.

[folksy]

tagged by @anthony-stonem to answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people 

Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people THE LAST: 1. Drink: water 2. Phone call: my mom. several times and she never replied 3. Text message: my cousin but the last person I’ve messaged was @hitchin-a-ride 4. Song you listened to: currently listening to “european son” by the velvet underground

5. Time you cried: today lmao because I threw a fucking fork away because I dropped it on the floor and he yelled at me and said I need to stop being “silly” but I literally have been diagnosed with something that ties into this

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: no lmao

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: no 8. Been cheated on: no 9. Lost someone special: yes 10. Been depressed: the last few years of my life  11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: no but I have drank before

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLORS: 12. orange 13. black 14. blue IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made new friends: only on here tbh I’ve kinda lost my offline friends

16. Fallen out of love: no  17. Laughed until you cried: hmm probably 18. Found out someone was talking about you: yeah I believe so and I’m always paranoid about it 19. Met someone who changed you: yeah

20. Found out who your friends are: sort of  21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: never had facebook and never will

GENERAL: 22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: above answer- never had a facebook

23. Do you have any pets: 3 dogs named Bucky, Lewis, and Cuddy along with my two rats Mardy and Rudie even tho Lewis generally is at the neighbor’s and I don’t see him much

 24. Do you want to change your name: maybe but idk what I’d change it to. I used to love the name Cloie and Sophie but now I think that Kathleen is cute    25. What did you do for your last Birthday: had a breakdown lmao but went out and ate                                                                                                          26. What time did you wake up: don’t remember but I usually stay in bed for a while before I officially get up. I know that I was awake before noon                 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: I think I was sleeping or trying to sleep

28. Name something you can’t wait for: to have money lmao and o finally buy green day tickets                                                                                                 29. When was the last time you saw your mom: earlier today

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: lmao a lot of things and not to be that person but I would like alot more money

31. What are you listening right now: "day of the lords” by joy division 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: probably but can’t think off of the top of my head

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: people insisting that I did something that I didn’t do and being rude to me about it

34. Most visited Website: tumblr probably lmaooo

LOST QUESTIONS. I JUST PUT IN RANDOM INFO ABOUT ME 35. Mole/s: yes. my mom has a lot so 36. Mark/s: as in birthmarks? I have one above my stomach under my boobs (tmi I know)

37. Childhood dream: I wanted to be a vet but now I couldn’t handle it

38. Haircolour: brunette

39. Long or short hair: short  40. Do you have a crush on someone: I’m not sure tbh?? 41. What do you like about yourself: uhhh I’ve always have naturally done good in school pretty much

42. Piercings: my ears but would like a nose piercing but probably wouldn’t have the dedication to look after it

43. Bloodtype :no clue which is bs because I’ve gotten my blood drawn before  44. Nickname: just from family. key-key, kir-kir, keek... as well as kir and someone on here refers me by it and idc if other people did. also, my dad has always called me stinker

45. Relationship status: single 46. Zodiac: pisces :/ 47. Pronouns: she/her 48. Favourite TV Show: don’t watch shows but I love courage the cowardly dog

49. Tattoos: none 

50. Right or left hand: right 51. Surgery: none thank god I wouldn’t be able to handle it 52. Hair dyed in different color: nope

53. Sport: don’t like any and I used to be a good swimmer but germs and shit ruined it for me so I never swim. so if I HAD to pick one it’d be tennis

55. Vacation: is this like my favorite vacation I’ve been on?? if so yellowstone itself was cool even if the trip there and back was kinda sucky

56. Pair of trainers: converse MORE GENERAL: 57. Eating: nothing rn

58. Drinking: water

59. I’m about to: nothing really. just doing this on tumblr dot com

61. Waiting for: when I can buy green day tickets in a few weeks. but rn waiting for someone to come online and reply

62. Want: money and more rats 63. Get married: no I don’t see the point 64. Career: would like to be a music journalist or work with music in some way even though I don’t know any technical stuff or how to play any instruments so possibly working on sites or social media, or album artwork/photography

WHICH IS BETTER 65. Hugs or kisses: hugs 66. Lips or eyes: eyes 67. Shorter or taller: taller 68. Older or younger: older

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: arms I guess  71. Sensitive or loud: sensitive

72. Hook up or relationship: relationship 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: hmm hesitant perhaps? HAVE YOU EVER: 74. Kissed a stranger: no 75. Drank hard liquor: no  76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: don’t have any. last time I went to get my eyes checked I had 20/20 vision

77. Turned someone down: no 78. Sex in the first date: no 79. Broken someone’s heart: a friend’s perhaps 80. Had your heart broken: always tbh. I’m very sensitive

81. Been arrested: nope 82. Cried when someone died: yes 83. Fallen for a friend: yeah 0/10 don’t recommend because it ultimately fucked our relationship

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 84. Yourself: lmao idk  85. Miracles: perhaps but depends on what you mean 86. Love at first sight: not really 87. Santa Claus: no 88. Kiss on the first date: depends  89. Angels: no

OTHER: 90. Current best friends name: don’t have any I don’t think. doubt anyone would consider me one of theirs

91. Eyecolour: blue, but like an icy blue

92. Favourite movie: don’t watch movies

not tagging anyone but if you made it here feel free to and thanks?

[thegracegatsby]

this post is all over the place but here’s a super long update if you care lmao 

So it’s officially been one month since i’ve been on this marketing internship in Prague which is basically working a full time marketing job without the pay (duh, Grace) lol I really thought I was going to be filing papers and going on coffee runs, but nope this is the real deal. I didn’t even get a day to fix my jetlag nor was I eased into the job. The day after I arrived I had 15 minutes to learn about all the projects everyone was working on, got acquainted with the office and the other interns, then started on all my tasks. To give you an idea of what I’ve been up to, my first week here I had to think of several marketing ideas for a local company and had to present them to the owner. The Stress and nerves had me on bed rest that weekend ngl lol. The owner loved the presentation, but I couldn’t help but be so hard on myself. I felt so underprepared I didn’t expect to be thrown into the field at full speed. I literally felt like the Mr. Krabs meme. I was shookington. I thought college and a regular part time job was hectic, but wow I was not prepared for job that required 110% of my time and mind. What I mean by that is I was/am technically working on four different projects and each of them need to be unique aka I can’t repeat ideas. I learned to trust myself and just trust that if I did my best…. it would just had to be enough. I can only learn from my mistakes and find a way to improve myself every day. Those “do one thing to be better than yesterday” quotes were always cute, but they have been extremely relevant this summer. That’s been such an important lesson and habit. Some other things I was up to is sometimes the company gets invited to special private events so so far I’ve attended two events. The first one being some networking event with a panel so different CEO’s discussed the future of tech & marketing and answered questions, then another event where the communications director of Manolo (shoe goals) spoke on the brand. Even got to meet her she was so sweet! Last week I got sent on my first official business trip to Poland to meet with different Korean companies at an expo! I had to basically see and negotiate potential products to market in the US and Latin America. Crazy. I loved every second of it. I’ve been meaning to write for a few weeks now so my thoughts are probably a little all over the place, but now is when I feel like I finally have the time and energy to sit down and catch up on a blog even if no one reads this lmaoo. It’s wild how a month and a half ago I left my job at the bank with a heavy heart and had my summer classes get cancelled/wasn’t able to register for any new one’s since they were all full. I was so close to doing nothing all summer except go job hunting again so this trip was such a blessing. It’s super challenging I’m not gonna lie. I feel like I’ve grown so much from being here. I’ve had to get out of my comfort zone in every single sense of the word. I’ve had to depend on myself mentally and emotionally in different ways than I’ve had to back home. I know this sounds super dramatic lol, but honestly this is the first time I’ve been away from my home, family, friends, city, for more than two weeks. Taking such a huge step without my family around has been difficult. It’s how I imagine it would have been like if I moved away for college. I’m going through “real life with training wheels” because I’m staying with family here so I’m not 100% on my own, but that’s the farthest thing from perfect. Like.. my extended family is going through some hell shit and I feel like I’m in the middle of it so I can’t escape it. I guess that’s where my desperate homesickness comes from. I was SO ready to go home I even asked if I could book a flight after TWO weeks of being here. That’s how desperate I was to go back home. I never talk about my personal life, but I will say that my actual home life, thankfully, is healthy. No relationship/family is perfect don’t get it twisted, but my parents learned from the mistakes of their families/friends and tried very hard to raise my sibling and I in a peaceful home. Don’t take this as the “I’m the best because my parents don’t hate each other can’t relate sweetie (: just be happy and drink tea” way because that’s not what I’m saying at all lol. Sadly, toxic families are everywhere, but reading/hearing about a household that is going through a nasty divorce with unhealthy drama happening every single day is completely different than actually experiencing/witnessing it with my own two naked eye balls. Especially from my own relative. I know this makes me sound immature or naive or whatever, but I mean… I’ve never lived anywhere else so I never knew anything other than my own family dynamic ya know? My empathy for children and teenagers who have to go through what I’ve been seeing on a daily basis has grown so much. Again, this isn’t a show off way of me saying “my life is semi-perfect” (no one’s is) I’m literally saying the change has helped me understand and appreciate the importance of a healthy home so much which… isn’t a bad thing. I’d rather learn this now seeing it from afar than with regret later on in my life. I’m genuinely so heartbroken and empathetic for every single person going through this much toxicity especially my own cousin who will have to grow up with the issues her parents are making alone. The biggest takeaway is I know what the fuck NOT to tolerate in relationships. If I thought my tolerance was low, now it’s even lower I’m not putting up with any bullshit ever wow. Now none of this would matter if I only got to work then go home and mind my business, but nah it’s not like that. An argument happened? Guess who gets some insults and bad attitude. Me. Since why did my extended family think it’s okay to disrespect and insult me for everything??? Don’t even get me started on the side comments about my weight :)) All I do is try to stay hydrated and mind my business! lmaofdnsfds. I guess that’s where the mental and emotional challenge comes from. I’ve never been a super emotional person literally the last time I cried from emotion was the day of the musical in high school because I messed up on stage and was super embarrassed. That was literally 4 years ago in April. I’ve had like two mental breakdowns already not including the countless times I’ve had to calm myself down, do some breathing exercises, and mentally try to disconnect from the fuckery. The hardest times being when I’m in public. I NEVER talk back tho which is weird because I hardly ever bite my tongue I’m quick to defend myself, but deep down I know the aggression stems from all these problems.. plus I try to tell myself it’s not that deep and I’m leaving in less than a month. I know I won’t have to deal with this ever ever again. Also honestly staying quiet gets everyone on my side because people see the way I’m spoken to and are like “wtf ignore it you’re doing great”. Lol I wish I could go into more detail because there is SO much tea I can spill, but for privacy (and maybe legal idk?) reasons I’m going to stay quiet. Another intern who started seeing the verbal abuse asked me about everything so I confided in her about all the drama and she’s like “wooow everything makes sense things were worse when before you got here” kjndvdf we were super tight it was so great :’) but she left and everything changed when the fire nation attacked. Honestly, everyone I work/have worked with have been so great. I only got close with like two or three tho but still everyone is so nice lol. So yeah even though the work experience here is amazing and something I will value for the rest of my life, the home life aspect is fucked up. I’m even trying to convince my parents to sell this plot to Lifetime lmao it’s THAT dramatic. *sigh* Some other news is I was supposed to be in Spain right now. I literally Uber’ed myself and my grandmother all the way to the airport yesterday morning, show up to the check-in counter with a smile and bags in hand just so they could tell me “Sorry, you don’t show up on our system” to my face. I’ve never had an issue with my flight so the room was spinning a lil and was low key panicking because 1. English isn’t anyone’s first language here 2. I was abroad and had no idea what to do because I didn’t even make the reservation so I had to call two different airlines and try to resolve the MESS, but nothing was resolved they fucked up my booking from the beginning so only my return flight was paid for not the departure :) so after easily deciding I was NOT going to pay $580 for a one-way outbound ticket, I had to quickly figure out my next move. (PRO TIP: ALWAYS BOOK DIRECTLY WITH COMPANIES THEY’LL WORK WITH YOU AND REFUND YOU IF SOMETHING GOES WRONG. EVEN IF YOU SEE A CHEAPER PRICE ON ONE OF THOSE TRAVEL SITES SOMEONE TOLD ME THEY’LL PRICE MATCH YOU AND EVEN GIVE YOU DIFFERENT FLIGHT ACCOMMODATIONS LIKE CHANGING LAYOVER FLIGHTS IT’S MAGICAL). Everyone I’m living with went to Spain the day before, so after bending over backwards to try and get the house key from my grandmother who already passed through security (she couldn’t wait for me bc the guy at security had 5 min to wheelchair her to her gate), I found a way to contact her (a blessing bc if not I would have had to stay at a hotel or something) and had her hand me the keys back to our place. I didn’t have the patience to take a bus back to the city so I paid the extra fare to Uber back home. The weird part is I’m not even mad. After calling the airlines, contacting my parents, contacting my family already in Spain that I wouldn’t be going, I was just… chilling. Got some groceries and I’ve been living la vida loca just eating and watching netflix lol. Sure, I wanted to go see a new country and even try to see the town my great grandparents were from, but if there’s anything I learned this year is… everything happens for a reason. I think it would have been an amazing trip, but there’s a reason I didn’t get to travel this weekend. Theres a reason I had to leave my job at the bank. Theres a reason I’m here in Prague in the first place. There’s a reason I’m witnessing this entire Mess. I guess there’s some growth in that too you know what I mean? Younger me would have probably combusted in hatred and be extremely negative and complain that “my life sucks” when in reality it’s fine it’s just in general, shitty things happen…. but life won’t stop for anybody not even me. On the bright side, some good lessons came out of this experience. Forget 2016, this was the real year of realizing things™. I’m going back to Miami with a completely different drive and mindset. For example, I knew school is important and I get good grades, but my attitude towards my education is COMPLETELY different now. Being “good” just isn’t good enough for me anymore. With my grades now I could get into a “good” grad school, but now I don’t even want “good” I want something better. I want great I want the best I want to work my ass off to get into an AMAZING school. I still don’t know everything or even want I want 100%, but this trip has helped me change how I plan to approach/execute my future goals. That “oh I guess I’ll work someday idk that’s a long time from now so I don’t care I’ll worry about it another day” won’t cut it anymore. Now that I’m thinking about it, a lot of things need changing when I get back. Which speaking of getting back, I’m counting down the days I’m so excited I leave at the end of the month ayee!! Lol okay I feel like I’m just rambling at this point. There were a few more things I wanted to say buut………… I forgot it so I’ll just end it here and make a new post if I remember lol. Even if no one reads this, future me will and she’ll remember how the Ctrl album from SZA was playing in the background while writing this and probably cringe at how bittersweet this whole experience/year has been.

TLDR I learned a lot on this internship (good and bad) and I’m basically going back home a new person :-)

[scenarios-on-ice]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

This ‘poem’ sucks but

Happy Birthday to you

(Note: there was originally like eight more cynical lines about how birthdays mean you’re that much closer to the end, but I scrapped it because when I try to use dark humor it usually just ends up kinda gruesome.

There’s probably something wrong with me and someday we’ll find out what that is, but today is not that day)

Congratulations! @(^-^)@  You were only sixteen but your mind was older- now you’re seventeen, but I’m sure the latter part of that quote still applies and the blog will blow us all away even more than before! Hope you have a wonderful, satisfying birthday despite how non-stop you are (don’t forget to take a break when you can) and one last time, congratulations!

(also depending on how the timezone difference between Croatia and Korea works, we’re only a day or two apart- my birthday is March 30th, which is tomorrow over here! :D so cool)

“Whatever you say ma'am, Furuta will pay for his behavior! I’ll use tumblr, I’ll write under a pseudonym(Evans)- you’ll see what I can do to him!

But at least since he’s dead, you can finally speak your mind?”

I know, I still like the idea of trans Mutsuki better but other than any hints dropped in canon, I just think it’s very unlikely that TG as a Japanese manga will add a 100%, conmpletely confirmed LGBTQ character. I believe Ishida himself is pretty open towards the LGBTQ community (Nico’s portrayal is a bit questionable but in an omake Yomo is shown thinking that anyone he dates could become Touka’s aunt OR uncle (though of course that could be a translation error), Shuu is a subversion of manga stereotypes regarding gay men and TG in general has a lot of interesting themes regarding sexuality and gender), but idk, the idea of a mainstream seinen manga like TG adding LGBTQ themes that go beyond heavy implication seems unlikely (though who knows, it could happen).

Mutsuki just makes me bitter. FIrst all the arguments about their gender and now I don’t even like them anymore (they used to be an adorable cinnamon roll but after recent chapters, while I still feel for them they’ve become a lot less sympathetic).

(Also this just makes me sound salty but I recently came across a very aggressive blog dedicated to reminding everybody that MUTSKI IS MALE AND YOU ARE ALL WRONG and reading through it just made me kinda mad and irritated all at once. Once a trans person made a post saying that despite being trans themself they didn’t think Mutsuki was, offering several manga moments as decent evidence and being quite polite, and the mod of this blog answered them with what basically boils down to 'lol no it’s possible to be transphobic even if you’re part of the LGBTQ community and you are clearly one of these people’.)

Don’t worry, cinnamon roll Hinami isn’t being forgotten! :) I’m really looking forward to her meeting Akira. I’ve always liked Hina but these recent chapters pushed her up on my ‘favorite characters’ list- she’s just way too sweet.

Reading the manga: wth Ishida you are officially my least favorite person like even Isayama is better than you

Reading Ishida’s translated tweets/the comments he makes in TG extras: why are you so nice

Yeah, I kinda hated Urie at first (I understood his goals and motivations but did he really have to be such a jerk? I honestly thought he was going to get somebody killed in the auction arc) but after the auction arc I started to like him better (I think the official moment I decided ‘I like Urie Kuki as a character’ was when Shirazu died) and I kinda freaked out when I realized what happened to him…

He would make a great Burr though. I think he’s way more willing to act than Burr and is not a ‘talk less, smile more’ kind of person (more like a ‘talk less and don’t smile at all’ type) but they’re still really similar. I could also see Urie singing Wait for It…with Kaneki as Hamilton. Not because Kaneki particularly fits Hamilton but because of how Burr is clearly somewhat jealous about Hamilton’s progress despite not approving of his methods in Wait For It (in an interview about the song I think LMM said something about it describing the feeling of watching your friends and acquaintances getting so far ahead in life and thinking 'Wait for it; someday I’ll get there too’).

Am I the only one who headcanons that despite acting super classy and not knowing much about rap/hip-hop before someone (maybe Hori?) gets him to listen to it, Tsukiyama actually turns out to be a really good rapper?

Speaking of Tsukiyama though, I want to see more of his interactions with Naki

Hmm, since Mado died after he was already an adult couldn’t Akira technically count? We know from omakes that Mado was a doting father and made her childhood as happy as possible, so while her life might not have been 100% perfect it was still really good in TG terms. Takizawa before he entered the academy also counts.

but even those two had so much tragedy happen to them as adults…

(also, have you started reading the manga again? :D)

ok, that sounds creepy. Not going to be watching that.

Thank you so much for the recommendations though! Not sure if I’ll get the time to watch those but I think I saw some Magi volumes in a bookstore here so maybe I’ll check that out when I have the time!

And yeah, if you have any good animes/mangas to recommend, please do! And genre doesn’t matter- though I usually prefer dark, psychological stories I’m willing to make exceptions when the series in question is really good (that’s what I did with YoI after all :) the only genres I’m really reluctant to read are horror and high school romances).

I’m glad you liked them! And nope, don’t mind at all  :D fangirling

I am back! Again, happy birthday ^^ I hope the day went well for you :) How old are you now, if you don’t mind me asking? I’m guessing it’s either 14 or 15.

And thank you very much for the poem, it’s very cute! I wouldn’t have minded the extra verses. They might’ve ruined the mood a bit, tho ^^;; The theme sounds like something baroque poems would write about... Don’t mind me, I just had an exam dealing with baroque, so I’m probably prone to making bad references to it. 

I will never manage to reach your level of puns... I’ll just say that I’m very satisfied with the amount of them.

“Just because he’s dead doesn’t mean he won’t come back. He died so another villain can take his place.

No matter how much I support trans Mu, I’d be very, very surprised if it actually become canon. I mean, as you’ve said, Japan and lgbt don’t quite go together that well... I guess we’ll just have to see... And nope, I still haven’t started to read the manga again. No time ^^;;

I’ve started to dislike Mu after the chapter in which his past was revealed. I just don’t have the will to stomach stories like that, honestly... Good horror/psychology manga/anime might interest me once in a while, but there’s a border I don’t like crossing. TG is waaay over it (which is probably a part of the reason why I dropped it, after all)

Gaah, it’s people like that that make dislike the lgbts... Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against people in that community and I won’t discriminate (though stuff like fictionkin and made-up pronouns do make me roll my eyes), but it’s these people that give people the wrong image about the whole community. Unfortunately, I’ve had quite a few encounters with those... aggressive people. I could go on and on about the things I saw as a part of this site, mostly concerning those ridiculous people who are probably in it because they think it’s ‘cool’ or ‘trendy’ to be bi or genderfluid.  I get waaay too worked up over this theme, don’t I?

Oh, I’m so happy about her not being forgotten! She is a precious cinnamon roll and doesn’t deserve the life she has, she deserves so much better.

Boy, that sounds fun. Well, Ive had experience with the ‘reading manga’ part, but I don’t particularly follow tweets ^^;; I hope things work out in the manga!

Idk, I mean, I disliked him at first, but I got to like him very quickly. I just seem to like silent types like him (I say that, and yet I also like Phichit, Viktor, Haise and so on, who are nothing like him.... WHOOPS).

Signs that I’m slowly forgetting TG: *reading the message* ‘who... are these characters?’ I mean, I know the most important ones, like Haise, Urie, Akira and so on, but the other ones... This makes me very sad ;-;

Yeah, I guess that would make Kaneki a good Hamilton. STILL DON’T WANT BURR (COOKIE) TO KILL HIM, BECAUSE KANEKI IS A CINNAMON ROLL WHO DOESN’T DESERVE TO DIE! The dynamics between Kaneki and Urie don’t make a good Ham-Burr, but their positions in their job, so I guess they really are the best pair for Hamilton.  Why did Ham have to die ;-; That makes casting so much harder for me.

Oh yeah, Tsukiyama would be an amazing rappers, I don’t doubt it at all. In fact, I’m sure that he’d be able to do Guns and Ships perfectly. 

Fun fact: You made a typo saying ‘Mado died after SHE became an adult’ (I changed it) and you gave me the biggest heart attack. Pls, my phone wasn’t used to the speed with which I typed ‘TOKYO GHOUL WIKI AKIRA MADO’ to check if what you said is true.  Yeah, Akira could count, I guess. That makes a total of ONE character... Not much, eh?

I don’t know if I count Takizawa... I think that the way his life is now, it very much makes up the lack of angst in his childhood.

Oh yeah, one last concern about The World Is Still Beautiful!

WHY IS THERE A CHARACTER NAMED LUNA WHO ACTS LIKE AN INSUFFERABLE BRAT DURING HER WHOLE SCREEN TIME, I DEMAND JUSTICE!

I’m done. 

One last recommendation:

LOVE LIVE AKA CUTE IDOLS. I invite you to join me in the pits of idol hell :) It(s not a romance, don’t worry. Also, there’s a mobile rhythm tapping game if you’re interested :))

Ooh, I’d be so happy if you’d start reading Magi! During the later volumes, it gets reeally psychological, so I think you might like it! I’d say something, but spoilers!

Well, I’ll go add the text to the post, then ^^

[beans-beneath-moonlight]

WHEEZES