#idk if i wanna try and write on such a big platform

[ccasey0]

what's this? refs for mikey and leo in the spirit au? no way!

tada! drew these in church lol.

mikey lore first!

Mikey had always been splinter's golden boy. he was the best student and always got everything right on the first try. He had the best connections with the spirits, he always meditated perfectly, and he would constantly go up into the mountains to hang up charms. His brothers didn’t think of him as a teachers pet though. Quite the opposite. They loved him. They weren’t jealous. Well, maybe a little bit. But not to the point where they didn’t like him. Although, when Mikey decided to spend the night up in the mountain one day, all his brothers opposed the thought. They all had heard the legends of the tax collectors. They dark beings who roamed the woods, collecting souls of those who don’t belong or have ill intentions. Even though Mikey was practically the purest heart out there, his brothers didn’t think the risk was worth it. Mikey didn’t care, of course, and he went anyway. Which made the boys freak out when he didn’t return for the next three days. Turns out Mikey had somehow fallen asleep in a cave-like part of the brush, and the spirits transported him to the base of the spirit tree. When he woke up, the night spirit was there. He was sitting atop the small altar with a charm in his hand. Mikey instantly got on his knees and tried to find a suitable offering, but was stopped by the night spirit. They talked for a while and Mikey was amazed at how many things his village had gotten wrong, including The spirits name: Casey. Eventually, Casey brought Mikey home. When they reached the village, Casey stopped at the tree line while Mikey kept walking. When Mike looked back, the spirit was gone. In his place, stood a wooden staff with beautiful wood burned engravings all up it. And at the very top, hung a small decorative charm. It had and eclipse embroidered on it. Mikey gad never seen anything like it. He walked towards the staff, which was somehow standing upright by itself, and took it. When his hand made contact with the wood, the moon symbol appeared on the back of his hand. A gift. From the Spirit of the Night.

woo!! That was fun :D Leo’s turn!!

Leo had always been the funny one. The irresponsible one. They one who never listened and always joked around. He always talked and talked and talked. But today was different. Leo didn’t know how to react when Mikey came back from the woods with a staff and a smile on his face. Of course he rushed up to hug his little brother. Of course he asked millions of questions regarding to his safety and well-being. But when Mikey told his brothers that he met the night spirit and that the spirit gave him the staff, Leo was left speechless. Which was very abnormal for him. When he finally opened his mouth to say something though, Splinter had already entered the room. When their master saw the staff in Mikey’s hands, his eyes went wide. He ordered the other boys to exit the room and they obeyed. It was early in the morning, so the cool air made all of them shiver as they exited the hut. they could hear splinter speaking with mikey inside the building, and instantly leaned against the door to try and get a better listen at what they were saying. leo couldn't really tell what all the fuss was about. it was just a fancy stick. mikey probably just found it in the woods and made up an elaborate story about it. but one thing was for sure, ever since mikey got back, the air felt different. he couldn't explain it, but leo was sure the atmosphere was different. the air was cooler and the plants seemed greener. it was just.......strange. as he looked around at his surroundings, he could have sworn he saw four glowing yellow eyes watching him from the trees. but he blinked and they were gone. maybe there was more going on then he thought.

oke, that took a bit longer to think up than expected. sorry for not getting this finished sooner, It's holy week and things have been busy for my school and my family. anyways, i hope you enjoyed! i know this one was probably a bit all over the place, but i hope it made a little sense lol

@allyheart707 hope you like it :)

[birdofprey1234]

Hello all. In case you've been unaware, recently tumblr has begun rolling out a partnership with Midjourney to scrape the entire website and its users' posts for their AI training. This includes peoples art, and probably also writing and photography. Anything you've posted the company may use for training, and you are opted IN by default.

Obviously this blog has been inactive for quite a while now, and no new art has been or will be posted here, but this puts me in a difficult position. I'm not sure exactly what I'm gonna do with this blog from here on. Some people have recommended editing posts to put a glaze filter over old art so that it's unusable, but I have many hundreds of posts, not all of which are tagged, and I'm unsure whether the AI training has already gotten a hold of them or not, making the potential filter useless. Not to mention the reblogs that already exist of the old un-glazed artwork.

I considered deleting everything, maybe even the blog itself, but that idea...sucks. I like the idea and the feeling that though I'm not active, my art is still out in the fandom tags somewhere, and that I have had an effect on the fandoms I was in and shared my art with. And again, the reblogs still exist, so I'm not sure what that would mean in terms of AI scraping. My worry is that deleting my blog would only relinquish any control I do have of what is done with my art.

As it is I'm kind of at a standstill. I was recently thinking over sharing my art again on other blogs, since I do miss being a part of that creative space. But now this change has kind of crushed that idea entirely. All this, plus the extreme transmisogyny apocalypse happening on here in the last month, and the seeming silencing of important movement tags like palestine, it really makes me want to ditch tumblr altogether. I've seen many people considering switching platforms. There's been a lot of markiplier mutuals specifically who have encouraged me to join cohost, I also have seen pillowfort as an option for others. But those platforms are new, kind of janky and will be hard to get used to for me. Plus, idk if I'm using them wrong but there's like...11 posts in each tag that I've seen so far, which kind of kills the feeling of being a part of a big open fan community I really love. Cohost seems like a nice platform, but if only 30-35 people move over, then it's really going to be a moot point. I wanna be where everyone else in the fandom is. I worry that this mass migration will only splinter communities, as we're all going to different places. I don't want to make 500 accounts on different platforms just to stay active and feel aware in the community.

My entire online social life up to this point has basically been on tumblr, I have a lot of blogs with a LOT of memories attached to them, and it would hurt to just drop them and move away.

Overall I'm at a loss. I enjoy sharing my work, my ideas and thoughts, I like being a part of these creative communities. But it seems like everyday the online space becomes more and more hostile toward creatives and fans, and much more advertiser friendly. One thing i never ever wanted to happen was for my art to be used for AI, and I naively thought that tumblr would be safe in that way. Guess not. I sometimes wonder if eventually all large social media will crash down and The People will dedicate to going back to personal websites and forums. I would enjoy a space where I could share my art on my own terms, and not have other peoples interaction with it overshadow everything else.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do yet. For now I will be staying on tumblr until I figure it out, but definitely no more posting creatively. I want to try to keep my work up if I can. I would recommend on all your blogs going to settings and toggling ON "prevent third-party sharing for this blog", as that will let tumblr know you wish your work, including reblogs of it to be excluded from the scraping. I'm unsure how actually useful this will be, or how much the company will respect these wishes but. It's there. I would also love for you to come talk with me @boobookiss and, hey, maybe make a cohost account. I'm on there as boobookiss as well. I hope to keep touch with you all and see this little community stay together.

[jizzlords]

knowing your partner can potentially make writing together a lot easier.

– BASICS.

♡ NAME: helvetica

♡ PRONOUNS: he/him

♡  SEXUALITY: lesbian™

♡  TAKEN OR SINGLE: ✌🏾

– THREE FACTS.

♡ i've had approximately two (2) individuals pay me more than once because they liked my writing. ( 〃 ．．) it wasn't on this site. but it was fairly recent. and i'm always dumbfounded looking back at it. ♡ i've aspired to be an animator. idk how possible that is now, dark ages for artists. but i'll try. i'd like to be strong enough to pursue digital artistry. at least. this is where the cool artist friends i've met here and knew for a while come in. ♡ i think a lot of you are super fuggin cool. and are really inspirational and comedic. idk how possible it is to know everyone but i'd love to.

– EXPERIENCE.

♡   HOW LONG (MONTHS / YEARS?): 10-11 years on this site. i'm prone to sticking to muses for maybe a year to 4-5 years, it depends. :}

♡   PLATFORMS YOU’VE USED: facebook, chatango, tumblr, discord.

♡   BEST EXPERIENCE: i really like tumblr's way of rp and connecting. faulty platform aside, i've met a lot of memorable people. i have some on my twitter even though we don't write anymore, i still love seeing them. and i am fortunate enough to run into old friends again on here. sometimes we even run into the same fandom without realizing.

– MUSE PREFERENCES.

♡   FEMALE OR MALE: males ... it's usually the funky ones i'm stuck with. or the beautifully intimidating ones.

♡  FLUFF, ANGST OR SMUT: hopeless romantic. but i like all 3. since one of you said all 3 make a good story in a thread, i haven't looked at this question the same.... it's true... it makes a nice balance.

♡   PLOTS OR MEMES: both. i rely on neither but i'll partake in both. if my partner has a preference, i'll work with it. easier for me lol.

♡   LONG OR SHORT REPLIES: a fine medium. it'll progress as replies keep going. pls don't make them too short, it leaves me reaching :{ and frying my own brain lol.

♡   BEST TIME TO WRITE: when i go back to work, nights (dead late nights). but now, it flows steadily.

♡ ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S): yea. lol. :} natural big-hearted whores.

TAGGING: @girlishgiggle, @gctchell, @vanaglcria, @ladiesofhell, @lcftcult, @prnkill, @videoaux, @k1ttyb0t, @clwngasm, @edenpoise, @spyderdust, @pridetempt, @arachnaemboss, @xluciifer, @queenhells, @helluvaflames, @hazbintales, @damnedrainbows, @discoinfernos, @chthonicrage, @yukikorogashi, @l-ucitiel, @r-adio, @pridefell, @infernalight, @filejpg, @voxistem, @helldustedstories, @fizeroli, @fizziifrxg, @the-delightful-temptation, @houseofasmodeus, @bloominghands, @spiderslvts, @outforlve i kinda wanna tag everyone not wanting anyone left out. lol. steal this if you feel comfortable answering these, i wanna know.

[rayofmisfortune]

IIIIIIII have a lil question for you, or rather two (and you can answer these whenever!)

First up! If you were to...mayhaps have a comic done of your lil fireboy and watergirl au beans (like just a silly lil one nothing major >_<) Would you be ok with it being posted and you being tagged and credited or would you rather it send through inbox (I...do not know the limitations of the Inbox tho so idk for sure if it'd work...? But thought I'd ask)

And second thing! Swearing. Like...full censor like a bleep or symbols to block out the word, or would a cut off word be fine? >_< (like sho- (this is shoot) kinda thing but with an actual swear) Have something in mind and while i'm not a big fan of swearing myself i sometimes have a character swear (usually some form of censored for anything drawn) and just wanna make sure I don't make you uncomfy >_<

Andddd for reading thro my rambling questions have a dood of your beans! (don't mind the terrible camera quality....)

They are both in basic my dood pose cause i was just trying to get a feel for how to draw them >_<

ik I say this a lot but- *shakes* A COMIC???? JESTER I WILL STRANGLE YOU- /aff /lh Someone transfer discord nitro on here so I can properly translate my excitement via emotes jfjfjfj

Uuuuuh to ANSWER!

I would be fine with it being posted and I tagged in it! Only if that's what you wanna do of course! Don't wanna force anyone into anything hehe

I'm fine with swearing! I myself have a veeery potty mouth so I really wouldn't have a problem with you doing either! (I do tend to avoid swearing when I write if that's any worth jfjfb) Though- thinking about it a little more... I'm just imagining a scene where one of them slipped and fell off a platform (not towards any body of liquid) and they'd scream their voiceboxes all the way to the heavens. Manage to say a curse, completely ignore the fact that if they were human they'd have a concussion- and focus on the fact that WOOO I JUST SWORE WITHOUT GETTING CENSORED YAHOOO JDJDJ ah- but to properly answer, yes I'd say they'd be able to curse. One earlier than the other. Probably Wamoon ending up annoying Solare with pulling up a personal playlist filled with curse words and singing along to them while Solare gets the guns (read fire) ready jrjrrj

*SHAKES YOU SHAKES YOU SHAKES YOU* ooooh I love that you noticed Solare's designs (forgot word oof) on his casing are sharper than Wamoon's! Didn't know if people would pick up on that but YUSSSSS I also love how you drew the fire and water in their hands! Very flowy and shapy!

[roomofshroom]

kyman headcanons part 2 !!!! SFW (cartman oriented!!!)

since yall liked my kyman headcanons so much i thought id give it another try and write down sum more ! :D

part 1: here

cartman would plan little fucking schemes to see if kyle really loves him (text him from a fake instagram profile, pay a girl to make a move on him, shit like that)

motherfucker craves attention so much, so he like pretends he's sick or dying or that something really serious happened to see if kyle comes running to him

kyle quickly realizes this is not a one time thing and is really annoyed w him but manages to come running everytime cartman pulls something like this, eric always treats him with a big smile when hes at the doorstep ("you came! :D " "ofc i came you said ur fucking mom was dying?! where is she?" "oh she just went shopping" "so you made it up?! you know how fucked up that is?!" "technically, my mom IS dying, we are ALL dying every second of every day ever since we were born, kHAL...")

cartman uses like an unhealthy ammount of emojis in every message, sends shit ton of tiktoks, reels, youtube shorts and has a completely different types of conversations w kyle on every social media platform all at once (like on instagram he's venting to him about how he doesnt feel appreciated enough by the world while hes sending him memes on discord and streaming himself playing fall guys or smth i dont fucking know)

kyle's style of texting is very simple, he doesnt like long messages, he doesnt really send memes or tiktoks or anything but he religiously watches everything eric sends him, responds to him asap and writes medium sized messages with emojis because cartman is super fucking clingy and goes on a rampage if kyle doesnt respond for more than 3 hours or if his response isn't "enthusiastic" enough (*eric sends a meme of cats with a "this is so us" comment* kyle: <3 eric: do you hate me? kyle: no wtf i dont??? why? eric: idk just seems like you hate me)

cartman hangs out w kyle's mom and makes kyle's mom unknowingly share embarrassing details of kyle's life just to tease him w the information later, they also look through baby pictures together

eric and kyle's mom love gossiping together and they watch say yes to dress together and critique the dresses ("the mermaid style dress with HER LEGS!? i thought she'd wanna show them off!" "yes, such a shame, wasted potential")

sometimes cartman just goes to kyle's house solely to hang out with his mom ("oh hey cartman, i wont be able to hang out today, i need to-" "no worries, I'm here to watch tlc w your mom")

cartman's love language is words of affirmation, obviously, and he makes kyle say everything he loves about him at least twice a week as a "communication exercise, so that their relationship stays good and they both feel appreciated" (its honestly just a way for eric to get praised, he loveeees that shit)

he knows kyle's love lang is acts of service (hes known him for years, kyle didnt even need to tell him) so while he's at his house he'll wash the dishes and fold his clothes but he won't admit to it, he actually hides it and feels embarrassed, kyle just knows ("hey, did you clean my room while i was downstairs?" "no?" "look, its clear you did, just say so" "i don't fucking know what you're talking about, khal" "...thank you, eric" "...shut the fuck up, jew, as if I'd touch your dirty ass room")

cartman's actually very shy with showing affection when its just two of them and when kyle says something sweet unprovoked, cartman usually blushes and shuts him down, turns it into a joke or straight up ridicules kyle ("you're actually very pretty, cartman" "yeah, you're pretty too... pretty gay, HAHA")

kyle's shy with showing affection in front of others and cartman fucking takes that and runs with it sometimes, doing everything to make kyle uncomfortable, he's being all lovey dovey infront of kenny and stan to see kyle cringe internally and awkwardly smiling on the outside to 'not seem like a bad boyfriend' (cuz when he once couldn't take it and told cartman to shut the fuck up, cartman got fake sad and stan came to kyle afterwards and gave a speech about "sometimes having to put up with stuff you don't like to make your girl, uhm sorry, to make your... significant other happy")

[rinadragomir]

Hi, I know you're taking a break from the fandom rn, but feel free to answer this ask whenever it suits you (no negativity I promise!)

I finished COT, and I felt like it gave off different vibes from other books (not just COG or COI - CC's books in general). I feel like it was darker in the beginning, what with James being sullen and Matthew being withdrawn and Cordelia being exhausted. And the part with London being all dark and silent and lonely and the Watchers going around - that kind of aura, I don't think anything like that was prevalent in other books.

I was just wondering what you thought about that? Did it feel kinda different from the usual too? The tone of the book, especially in the beginning, seemed to give off despair and used hope, though that could be due to James' gloom and all the miscommunication and cracked relationships-

What are your thoughts on the vibe of COT, especially compared with the other books in the series and in general?

HIYA! Oh it's alright ~ for you I'm always available🤗

Yeah the first half was really dark. Golden trio was in their Twilight New Moon Era

You're absolutely right about James's perspective but I'd also add Cordelia's. Everything seemed really dark through their eyes till chapter 23, I haven't felt this level of depression and hopelessness for a long time.

Oh oh I should mention that I absolutely loved the "Dark London" part with everyone losing their minds. Downworlders clapping for so long their hands start bleeding, mothers singing lullabies to empty prams😳

Yes, I certainly feel the same about the different vibe. Some of the chot scenes seemed more.... mature? comparing to her other books. The way the whole Matthew's alcoholism situation was handled, Grace's regrets, Cordelia's depression, Thomas trying to find the healthiest ways to build his relationship with Alastair, Charles's fears and lack of confidence in himself and everything around, James and Matthew's moments in Edom. The way it was written feels different, but I like this particular change.

And for some reason this book feels shorter than the first 2. Maybe it's because my personal favs had less pages than something else, but it's just me. (Arianna deserved as many pages as Thomastair, MAYBE EVEN MORE I SAID WHAT I SAID). And maybe since I'm reading pretty fast, especially when it comes to Cassie's books, I can finish this whole book in a day. I'll be completely satisfied the day Cassie's books have around 1200 pages ☝🏻or more😡

So, about the "mature" part. Years pass, Cassie's audience grows and I'm really happy that her books sorta "grow" with us? Dude idk why thinking in English is so hard😞 if it was a Russian platform, I'd slay😤So! Cassie added mature topics before, some of the TMI moments were really dark, but the way these topics are written/handled is just getting better. My personal opinion is that TLH characters just feel more real than others and this is the result of Cassie developing her writing. I feel like she's still in the process of trying new things/ways to describe and create sth. And this is why the books have a different vibe.

It can be confusing sometimes, but I'm actually glad these changes happen. I understand that writing one series for decades can be exhausting and I know Cassie has big plans for the additional TLH content, TWP and stuff, but I was so afraid one day she can just give up on it (+ all the hate she received after chot release 😒). So knowing that she's still trying new things gives me hope cause it means she's still invested in this series. So I'm really looking forward to her future TSC project👀+ I'm continuing sending her nice asks

I'd write more, but I wanna eat and I'm lazy☺️

[hees-mine]

i've been inactive but i just caught up on your page and wow! The patreon is def a good marketing idea lol. There will definitely be people who pay to read your works since desperate horny ppl with money buy anything😂this whole "i don't have enough money" excuse is tickling me bc it seems like these ppl have more things to worry ab than begging for part 2s😭.

but yeah it was a bit surprising bc even though writing is time-consuming and im not getting paid on here, that's not what I do for it for. I genuinely like expressing my creativity for the fun of it and over time it feels like a piece of art. its just fun idk.. it's kind of mind-boggling that you're complaining about not getting anything in return because what else would you get in return? All your supporters can do is like comment and re-blog, they can't do anything else bc it's just a social media platform lol. i'm a pretty big page but even if it were 20 people reading I would still enjoy pleasing those 20 ppl. If the hate or negativity ur referring to is getting that bad I personally would just turn off asks!

ur gonna do what you wanna do and you'll make money regardless so kudos to you! It's just that i don't think this writing field should be taken so seriously or have such an effect on you, and heeseung is a human being in real life, so it is kind of weird that you'd want financial gain from it since he can't consent to that. but hey I support everyone's hustle.

you have amazing stories on here so I took a sigh of thanks that you're not going to delete or deactivate. They get me through a lonely night girl.😂😂def just delete the app if it ever gets too much for u!

Sigh

The wording of this is horrible

A lot of back handed compliments here but it’s all over text so maybe I’m not reading it right so I’m not going to dive into it

As far as money goes people can do whatever they want with it if they have it they have it if they don’t they don’t I’m not going to get into peoples finances let alone call it an “excuse” however I do agree their are more important matters than asking for a part 2

Key word YOU don’t do it for that reason me and you are two different people I don’t do it to make money either cause this blog was free to the whole public in the beginning so money was not on my mind when I made it

By you saying “i genuinely like expressing my creativity for fun” implies that I don’t

Im sorry that your mind is boggled because when I said I don’t get something in return was not in regards to money it’s a simple request for respect thats what I’m not getting here is basic respect and thats all I’ve been asking for for the past couple months

I get how social media works lol and the thing is I don’t need numbers or reblogs simply appreciate and respect my wishes and we’re gucci over here I don’t care if I had one reader as long as you’re appreciative of what I take time out of my day to do I’m cool with that

The negativity comes in more forms than just my ask box

I’m not taking it seriously and I don’t think anyone else is either clearly at the end of the day it is by no means affecting me in my personal life

Geez

This isn’t about “financial gain” it’s an opportunity for me to try and find the people who actually care about what I do and weed out the ones who just mass consume content with zero feedback sure I’d be making a little money off it but it would never be enough to sustain anything in real life I’m not greedy for a few bucks

So basically with that logic if him not being able to consent to me writing stories about him and making said money from those stories people would have to stop making fanmade items as well cause he’s not consenting to that either

Or is this different because there’s smut involved?

Either way it’s neither here nor there

Again the financial gain part is not even what I aim to do like I said some money would be involved yes but I’m not out here asking for 200$ dollars

Don’t know if you looked far enough but I’ve stated multiple times that if anyone had questions about pricing and what content they’d like to see then shoot me a dm/ask I’m open to making this a place where my readers can be happy and I can get away from the negativity that has plagued this blog

Thank you for liking what I put out i appreciate it🩵

It’ll never be a point where it gets too much because as I stated it’s just annoying but other than that it doesn’t have an impact enough for me to delete my blog it’s only an issue on tumblr

If I do ever delete it’ll be because I’m done with writing

Thanks for the input I hope my response just gives a little more insight on what things are like from my pov

[popponn]

hehe popon !!! i'm like trying my best to keep my eyes open bc i am v tired 😞 so i am apologising in advance if there are any grammatical mistakes in this chunk of text 🤞🏻😸 but hi lovely:

WISHING U A HAPPY BIRTHDAY, POPON !!!! i not sure whether it's like ur birth date where u live yet, but it is for me, so i hope this mssg is on time ! but happy birthday to one of the cutest, cleverest and sweetest yoichi kissers in the world 🫶🏻😽 isagi loves u sm and giggles and kicks his legs when u post him on ur blog (real. bro told me and i was "damn yoichi 🤨")

on my friends' birthdays, i usually write a letter and give them my thanks for a number of things. and i think the number one thing i wanna say "thank u" to u for is definitely our interactions <3 u have always been friendly to everyone who interacts w u, including me, and i reckon i'm rly lucky to met u this year !!! u're a kind soul w a lot of love to give, and i think that's why we all love u sm !!! and i'm super thankful for all the times u've visited my inbox/mssges 🫶🏻🫶🏻 it makes me happy hehe

i must also mention that i am so thankful that i was able to find "coincidences and flickers" one fateful day,, like that series has the potential to forever change me as a person and even make me become a temporary isagi kisser (never forgetting who i am 😤) <33 it was that series that helped me find ur blog and realise the insane amount of talent u have for writing !! my favourite writers on this platform often changes (sometimes it's a, or sometimes it's b), but i think u have a fixed position up there <3 i truly adore u and the way u write, so thank u for all the works u post 🫂 it's such an honour to be mutuals w a v skilled writer

i also wanna thank u for all the reblogs u make on everyone's works <3 when u reblog my fics w a bunch of tags, it truly makes me feel like that the effort i have put in didn't go to waste bc there was someone who appreciated what i wrote. also like,, the quality of my writing often fluctuates (😞💔), but u reblog them anyways, and i will ALWAYS thank u for that !! i love uuu (⁠づ⁠￣⁠ ⁠³⁠￣⁠)⁠づ🫂💞

oh, and, thank u for constantly feeding my reo delusions 😸😸 not sure if i'd love him the same without u telling me that reo loves me too lol 😽🧎🏻‍♀️

i do hope that everything will treat u nicely today !!! and every other day bc u deserve it <33 eat cake, laugh w friends and mb be silly for a little while—u're not a grandma yet, so have fun being in ur twenties, popon !!!!

love u always 🫶🏻☹️

(i hope u like words bc this was a bit of a read lmao)

SAKI IM SOBBINGGG???????? WHATT????? D: JESUS I WILL BE WORDY TOO!! HOW DARE U MAKE ME ALL SOFTTTT thank u so much for typing all this despite being very tired omg ;;;; im gonna bawl mom im so glad i meet saki the sweetest adgudk (also...my grammar is also a mess i hope this shall be forgiven as i am sincere ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡))

it already is!! :">> thank u for remembering it bae :""" and omg yoichi did all that? i get even more in love :(( pls tell yoichi i also kick and giggle when he breathes :(( AND HEY YOU ARE OVERPRAISING ME WHAT IF MY HEAD GET BIG [ahjussi voice]

saki :(((( im also very thankful i get to meet you this year ue ue ue ;;; i never thought i will ever talk to you (or anyone here at all tbh sksk) like i was very shy and hesitate a lot, but then you are there?? being so sweet friendly and welcoming ;;; like you are one of the reasons i'm here and i mean it??? like you are one of the person who gave me courage to be more friendly here too hehe <3 im so glad i meet someone as kind you saki <3

im gonna start blushing and bawling fr now. IM SO GLAD I MAKE THAT SERIESS ;;;;; (CHAPTER WILL COME SOON TRUST!!) hdfkdj idk what to say here before sounding like a madman so uh ;;;; pls know that i was so happy too when u commented and reblogged so positively ;;;;;;; ghjk saki your praises i think i read them over and over girly u r too sweet for me sometimes ;;;;;; ♡( ˘ ³˘)♥︎

okay channeling my coolness energy a bit, saki 🫵i like your writing GENUINELY!!! okay! so im glad you like the madman ramblings in the tags :>> and come on buddy fic writer to fic writer, it would be impossible to like everything we write SKSKSK remember that one time i immediately lose it after posting that rin studying fic. sigh. stupid ass me. BUT YOU AND EVERYONE WERE THERE AND IT SERVED ITS PURPOSE HOHOHO SO I TOO FEEL IT WASNT A WASTE HEHEHEHE

and i will keep feeding ur delusion get ready (❀❛ ֊ ❛„)♡ also quick mention real quick your cats are cool sunglasses or not

THANK YOU FOR THE WISHES SAKIII!!! omg :((( thank you so much for?? writing all these gosh uhuhuu i will reread this over and over again a lot of times today hehe (no matter how busy and hard it is to open tumblr today!!!) this make my day so much ;;;;;; uhuhuhu and aw <3 i will!!! i wanna make a grandma joke again but for today i will spare saki uwu

i love you always too!!!! 🫶🏻😤

[de4dlyniightshade]

heyy :) erm im gonna fangirl really quick and then the request will be at the end incase you wanna skip to that part or anything, lol. okay so this is very much unnecessary and unasked for and blah blah but i don't care! i believe writers need to hear how much we appreciate them and their works because whew mama! ive been trying to write fics for like months and it actually is so horrible. i genuinely start to angrily vibrate bc my thoughts don't flow on the notes app. but i just wanted to say, nightshade, (ehehe that's so cheeky and silly for some reason) that i reallyyy love your work. its actually like horrific how much your writing just makes me so 😜😊🤭 i know you're not like a celebrity or anything, so it's gonna be weird with this like mini parasocial relationship thing, but please know your work has an impact !! a few months ago, i did something extremely bad and out of character while i was spiraling, and i decided that the best decision for me would be to quit using social media. (and beforehand i had quit using tiktok for like 7 months already and i wasn't that addicted to my phone but i still was consuming negative media) so, ofc, i stopped completely for a good month or so and only ever using youtube every now and then. buttttt, one of the first social media platforms i came back to first... was tumblr! it's actually so silly too because i only used tumblr like 4 times beforehand so i was quite new. but anyway anyway (im a yapper UGH) i really found that your posts had made me feel happy :) idk they kinda reminded me of myself before i went big bad that one time and it made me inspired to go back to how i used to be... u get me?? you're writing literally haunts my brain oh my lord it should be illegal to read your stuff because afterwards i literally have this crazy ass urge to read more and more and more. im lowkey an addict cause i be having my deadlynightshade withdrawals. the way you write is just so 😫 gosh, it's beautiful. i also love ur sillyness because like ME TOO. your random little posts are so me coded and i love it. YOU'RE SO FUNNY 😭 uhmm i just wanted to say thanks for being super cool and talented because believe it or not, the stuff you put out makes me really happy! (that was so melodramatic like mf they write about spencer being a pathetic pussy drunk bitch why are you saying it changed ur life?? its true tho.) erm yeah that's the end of that part i just again wanted to thank you 🙏 i wish we were friends SO BAD like you're actually awesome what the fuck.... but like how do u even become friends w ppl?? LMAO ERM ANYWAY 😍 can you write a blurb or h.c or something (honestly anything will make me happy) about valentine's day?? 🤭 basically spencer being SO FUCKING SHY because you can't stop touching his hands or hair subtly or like kissing his cheek leaving marks from lipstick or like getting him his favorite snacks/drinks/books/textures/ basically a gift that made u think about him?? ugh or him doing the same with you like him being the best fucking nerd boy ever and spoiling you so much like he goes ape shit spending well over his funds limit but it's worth it because it's you? or like sweet soft cutie pie sex? at the end of the day and he's like... Erm.. Pussy for 1 please! you were so pretty today... You always are-! (I'm mentally ill and writing this at 8:37 pm on a thursday night.)

this is. the sweetest shit anyone has ever said to me i actually cried ngl to you.

i'm genuinely so thankful for the little community i have created here i never expected such an insane amount of positivity and love from people just for the whack ass shit i write but that's probably just my perpetual self hatred and disbelief that people enjoy anything about me🤞

i think it's crazy how people on the internet who have never met me, don't know me, what i look like, or anything can treat me better than any of my friends have and i'll always be thankful for that.

ALSO! i love being called funny pls kiss me i never think i'm actually funny istg

i was also planning on writing a valentines fic ALREADY but this made me wanna write it even more as a thank you for this message it genuinely made my week(can't promise it ON TIME for valentines but i can try!)

i'm also so glad that my work and blog makes you happy, there's no privilege greater than making someone smile even when they don't feel like it</3

[decepti-thots]

re: writing fandom meta and why there might be less of it recently - the fandom spaces I started out in ~15 years ago didn't have any meta, at least not in the way they have now, so the whole thing is comparably new to me. and then the meta I see always posts that seem to take SO MUCH of canon/background knowledge into account, so many things that I haven't even heard of. and there's so many posts criticizing (parts of) fanon and common fannish opinions, which I often understand, but which also feel a bit elitist and doesn't make me wanna try putting my thoughts on a piece of media into words just to get criticized. finally, I also don't know how to - last time I analyzed media was in school, and I was never good at it.

Thank you for this ask anon, first off! All of this is really interesting to hear, and a lot of it lines up with things people said in shorter responses directly on the post, so it looks like there's definitely some overlap in terms of common pain points in terms of this stuff. (And not just "pain" points, to be clear- folks also basically said that they preferred expressing their ideas through fiction, which is fair, and not really a thing that exists as something causing friction, per se, as much as an active enjoyment of fanfic as a way to express ideas.)

I hope you don't mind if I use this response as a launching point to give a few of my personal thoughts on this, because you so happened to bring some stuff up I kind of wanted to give a perspective on anyway. Not necessarily as a direct response in all regards, but it seems as good a place as any to touch on my own feelings? (Under a cut, feel free to skip this, if you do then thanks again for responding!)

The point you make about how meta wasn't much a thing in fandom spaces you were in 15 years ago is interesting, because one of the things I always think when I see the argument there's universally "less meta" now than there used to be is: does at least some of this stem from the folks saying(/bemoaning) this come from them being in different fannish spaces that the ones they're in now and not realising? It's a similar thing to when people confidently assert "people comment less on fics than they used to", where I can't help but wonder how much of that is just that the fandoms they are in today have different ways of engaging with fanwork, or different expectations, or that the fandom spaces they used to be in commented a lot relatively speaking. 15 years ago, I was in fandoms mostly based around LiveJournal communities, which were often assumed to be the obvious "centre" of fandom activity by folks in said communities. (Incorrectly; LJ only looked like the "main hub" of all online fannishness if it was where you and your fandoms mostly clustered, IME.) A lot of those were media fandoms (though not all) and those tended to have a lot of meta, I would argue at least in part because LJ as a "format" encouraged the posting of long, pre-mediated posts that lent itself well to folks wanting to write meta. But some other fandoms (a lot of anglophone animanga fandoms come to mind) tended to not have nearly as much because people were mostly engaging with them in places and communities where those things didn't line up in a way that encouraged it. The move to Tumblr and even Twitter as big fannish platforms where things work differently is then probably also of note, idk!

(Sidenote: the AO3 meta wars when it launched are probably worth mentioning, since the push to allow fannish nonfiction on AO3 was in part a result of Tumblr seeming like a very bad replacement for LJ when it came to posting essays!)

Anyway, a really common thing that seems to be cropping up is the "if I post an opinion as meta, it opens me up to [potentially virulent, potentially bad-faith] criticism, and that sounds unfun" fear. Which on the one hand is not necessarily untrue because I think even now fannish norms around meta are just a little different than other forms of fanworks, yes. Meta is usually seen as, on some level, an invitation to discussion in a way that e.g. fanfic often isn't. What I do think is interesting to think about here is it seems like there's not a lot of faith that there could be productive, even fun disagreement on specifics and readings. I'm not saying that wariness is necessarily wrong, to be clear. (I have been on the receiving end of plenty of virulent, bad faith "criticism" in my fannish life, haha. Or just... like... bad criticism that is tiring and unproductive and unnecessary, lol.) I mention it more because it seems worth explicitly saying that the assumption that being contradicted, corrected and/or argued with is an inherently unpleasant or even disciplinary way to experience fandom is one that seems to be pretty deep-rooted in fandom right now, and it seems worth pointing that underlying principle out.

To bring that back a little to the "platform shapes the fandom engagement" thing, I do think the way Tumblr works contributes to that. Reblogging to add additions has a very different impact that replying to someone else's static blogpost, and reblogging is (as people do keep pointing out on viral posts, haha) the primary encouraged form of interaction on this site. It's different in multiple ways; a person reblogging something often feels like they are talking about your ideas in the abstract and not by talking to you as a person which can encourage a very different tone and approach on their part and make their addition read very differently. And it also means that your post may not just be contradicted, but the contradiction may wind up being exposed to huge numbers of people as the default way of seeing your post and opinions. That makes the idea of being subject to that disagreement higher stakes, I feel, and also the idea of productive back-and-forth functionally impossible a lot of the time. (It also means having a full conversation often requires constantly spamming your followers, let alone multiple convos.)

So I fully get it. But I do also think it's a shame that it can be really hard to imagine fannish communities where disagreeing back and forth on different ideas about a canon or text is... fun? I guess? I sometimes find that stuff fun, is the thing! When done in a good faith way and an environment it works in. You wind up with all these interesting perspectives that may run very contrary to your own but still have interesting ideas in them, and sometimes you wind up with opportunities to expand on ideas you had but hadn't yet found a way to articulate them. I don't think that's going to be fun for EVERYONE but I think it's a shame that it seems so universally... terrifying, for a lot of people? Fandom is a very good place, if nothing else, to practice getting comfortable with low-stakes intellectual disagreement. (Because for most things, it really is low-stakes as hell.)

I do want to touch on the elitism comment though. I find that... a strange perspective tbh? It's true that doing analysis generally holds a baseline expectation of familiarity with the canon, but I can't really see how that can reasonably be called "elitist". Similarly I think there's a sense where someone will sometimes see people strongly dislike a thing they enjoy and feel the need to argue why that person is "wrong", such as when folks defend their fave fanon against folks who find it tiring/uninspired/etc. I think this post really sums my thoughts on that up, tbh. Sometimes what can kneejerk feel like a person passing judgement on you is actually them being a bit bitchy in their own space knowing full well they're talking about their own taste and nothing more. IDK.

[bthump]

This isn’t specifically about you and more about the anons, because I’ve noticed that you sometimes get requests to respond to meta posts other people make and something about that makes me a bit uncomfortable. Since your meta posts are widely liked by a big part of this community, it sometimes feels like you’re being kinda requested to „debunk“ other meta posts. Diversity in opinions is so important for a good fandom atmosphere and some of the anons you get seem to wanna stir up hostility and I don’t like it. Since I like some of your meta posts, but also find myself agreeing with other people, I just feel weird about this dynamic, you know? How do you feel about it?

I think that's a fair concern but honestly, I don't see it as inherently a problem. This might be my 00s internet bias here lol, but I tend to view meta on a public platform as fair game for response or external commentary - which includes my own posts. My meta is here to be read by anyone who wants to, and to provoke thought and discussion, and that's generally what I assume of others' meta as well.

Like I recognize that attitudes have changed in the era of mostly unmoderated spaces and reblogs and the lack of diverse comms with their own norms and discourse running rampant lol, and so it's often considered automatically rude to disagree with people now, but I think that can only extend so far. Like, I don't reblog posts just to disagree with them (unless they're a friend and I know they're cool with discussion) because I know it sucks when you keep getting notes from people who are liking or reblogging the take you disagree with, but I don't think that should mean not discussing other people's meta at all, as long as it's done respectfully of course.

And I understand why someone might want a second opinion on something they read. I think everyone should think for themselves and form their own opinions, and I completely agree that diversity of opinion is important in any fandom. But not everyone has confidence in their own analysis, or the learned skills for criticism, and I think it's reasonable to seek out other viewpoints and decide which seems most correct to you, or use them as boucing off points to figure out what you believe. I definitely don't want to be the only Berserk meta blog out there, and I'm more than happy to agree to disagree with most people. I'm not an authority on the story lol and people are free to agree or disagree with me however they see fit.

That said, I'm always a little wary about tone and intent, especially in Berserk fandom, because I'm not here to get into arguments and I try to make that clear. But I take most asks in good faith. Sometimes I might go a little too far with that lol, but honestly I'd rather come across as naive than hostile. If I found out that someone was trying to start a fight between me and someone else, or was using my posts to dunk on someone else, or if followers of mine took it as a cue to harass someone, I'd absolutely say something and stop answering those asks. (Hopefully we're all chill enough over here that this doesn't happen, btw. As far as I'm aware I've never incited anything like that and I've personally only ever seen fandom arguments started by people mad about Griffith fans existing, but tbf I also don't pay attention to whatever's happening outside of my dash.)

But yeah I don't think that's what's happening here, and I don't want to assume someone's trying to start shit unless there's clear evidence for that. Like in the last ask I got like this, the anon did specify that they agreed with the post they wanted me to comment on, and were just seeking more opinions/wondering what my own take was, and I think that's reasonable.

Idk, this is definitely one of those things where I know there are different valid opinions about etiquette. But I generally abide by the 'do unto others' rule, including here. I blog with the expectation that anyone can read what I write and agree or disagree, and that I might inspire other discussion. Sometimes I get nervous about being linked to notably hostile fan spaces, like the berserk reddit, but it has happened with virtually the same motivation as those anons (what do you guys think of this person's take?) and ultimately I'm fine with it, and even a little flattered.

All that said, at the end of the day I do think that it would be best for anyone who sends an ask referencing someone else's analysis to be specific about what they want to know, rather than a general 'what do you think of this?' question. Both because it shows why you're asking and what you're interested in and leaves less room for doubting your motivation, and because it makes it easier to answer.

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

I do feel bad for all the spam from last night, so I'm just gonna write everything in one message 💺 anon

Firstly, I HAD A DREAM ABOUT HIM!! It was only us at a train station, he was talking on the phone with lem while holding a briefcase in his right hand. We realized the train we have to take is on another platform and we have to use an escalator to get there. But THIS MAN thought "screw that" and started walking there on the railway track while a TRAIN WAS COMING?? The train stopped before it could it him (somehow??) and in true Tan style, he started arguing wirh the train driver (while still on rhe phone with lem) I think my brain combined the fact the ideas of Tan and the train story.

I have no idea if I sended those last night because I found them in my notes this morning so if I did and I don't remember I'm sorry !!

(About whole Morioka scenerio) I already send in two requests so I'm going to save that one for next time!! "just turn it on dnd and his calls go to voicemail" Oh you know we are in for it when he gets home (why does this kinds go well with my smut request?)

Also something I wanted to add : I was so obsessed with the idea of him in our floral stain gown that I forgot about the plaid pj bottoms, they are my favorite so we matching!!

About the him shaving idea, sorry I didn't know if I should add that or not, I got that idea because atj looked like a baby when promoting the movie in Seoul. I would be so sad I'll give him the silent treatment for a few days 😭😭

Reading "my man is texting me" got me blushing like a tomato. I'm alwaye talking about how he refers to us as his wife, the wife and missus, so we also refer to him as my man and my husband!!

I wanna send in more of my own text convos if that's okay, they are so fun to write!!

+ also yes about the femme fatal vibes

💗

😭😭 it’s all good !!

1- YOU HAD A DREAM ABOUT HIM??? OMG IM SO JEALOUS

hate when my brain merges different things that you thought about in the day (but not if they’re good obviously) I had one last night/this morning that I was brushing my teeth and the paste was fluffy and was like expanding foam and was choking on it, all bc when I brushed my teeth before bed I used too much and it was kinda chunky and made me feel sick 😭😭😭😭

i had a small dream about him a couple times but it was a while back and now I can’t remember

2- you’re all good, you sent them in 😭

3- 😭😭😭 it always suits well with tan (I’ll try to worm that in somehow if I can for your request)

4- RIGHT???? I love the idea of him idk answering the postman in the morning and wearing something of yours bc it was the closest/ first thing he could see. then it became a habit of wearing our gowns and stuff. and for us his plaid bottoms and a hoodie (all his)🫠

5- HAHAHA no no don’t worry about it, I just meant that it always messes with me and makes me think they’re a stranger bc facial hair is a big part of someone’s face. “I can’t even look you in the face. you look so naked without it” or “I miss your stache:(“ or “haha baby face” I think it’s bc I have a thing for facial hair and id be freaked out not seeing it on someone that’s always had it (I think that makes sense)

6- hehe right??? he deserves to be spoken about possessively too 😭😭😭 (not even possessive but you get what I mean)

7- ofc yes!! send them in

💓💓

[nolanhattrick]

For the ask game, every multiple of 5.

bestie that's so many

5: what does your latest text from someone else say?

"This robot is trying so hard" in response to a youtube shorts link i sent

10: when is the last time you played the air guitar?

people actually do this??

15: do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

behind. always. i fucking hate getting my picture taken. froggie can attest to this after she made me get after i got BeReal

20: what is your greatest weakness; greatest strength?

damn we're going with the serious ones tonight aren't we? i like to think that, in face-to-face irl situations, i'm a good listener. i just fucking suck at responding. especially after my covid infection, i can't brain-to-mouth words anymore. the edit feature on imessage has helped this significantly since 99% of my interactions happen over that text platform but hooooooly shit i'm so bad at speaking

25: do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

i really like facetime but i fucking HATE looking at myself in the little window so i'll usually point it directly at my ceiling unless it's with One Specific Friend, mostly bc she's already seen me naked so her seeing me at Not My Best isn't a big deal and also like. idk i just fucking Hate My Face lol

30: stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? do the same with your left.

since i'm in bed and the only thing to my right is... the air. pumpkin is directly in FRONT of my right arm so i'll go with that. my phone is in front of my left arm.

35: to you, what is the meaning of life?

dude i don't even know. fuck around and find out. see more than twelve thousand trees. don't tell your friends they do too much yoga. own a cat. have at least one sex-induced medical emergency. confuse a seagull for an eagle when you're high as shit and get laughed at for it. drink a truly on the beach and watch the tide come in. eat so many cherries you shit yourself forty five minutes later and don't regret a single second of it. buy all of the notebooks you see in the bookstore and don't write in any of them. sleep outside when it's warm enough. take care of a houseplant. go far enough away from the city to actually SEE the stars. work with children. cry because of a dumb movie. breathe.

40: do you drive? if so, have you ever crashed?

yes: coming home from the seattle/tacoma metro area i got hit by someone going 90mph (145 kph) on the interstate. genuinely thought i was fish food that day.

45: what's the worst injury you've ever had?

probably the time i attempted rifle and caught it w/ my skull instead of my hands.

50: do you believe in magic?

eh

55: love or lust?

insert "why not both" gif

60: is there anything pink within ten feet of you?

yes, a couple things. a couple of bowls, a bag of potting soil, my sharps containers, some animal shaped erasers, a solid 50% of my sex toys are pink for some reason.

65: top five favorite blogs on tumblr?

peach, froggie, lou, steph, and vati

70: are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend?

i would choke me out without hesitation i do not understand how froggie tolerates me to be honest with you

75: what are the last four digits of your phone #

what are you a cop???

80: what size shoes do you wear

i don't know bc it's changed since i've started t and now none of my shoes fit

85: what's the last song you listened to?

i wanna get better by bleachers (title of my current wip comes from this song!)

90: you wake up to find that you're surrounded by mummies. they aren't doing anything, just standing around your bed. what do you do?

assume i'm dreaming and try to go back to bed

95: you just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. you have to depart right now. where are you going to go?

do i HAVE to??? i don't have a passport and i don't like airports :(

[atinycupofpositivitea]

Hii, it's been a long time since I logged on to this site. I'm just here to say thank you and also to apologise.

About a year ago, you helped me a lot with my worries and overthinking, you gave me a lot of helpful advice that definitely changed my way of thinking and helped ease my anxiety and overthinking. So big thank you for that! I'm really grateful 💗

I'm also sorry because back then, I sent quite a few asks about different worries of mine but I never quite mentioned that it was me (aka the same anon) so it might have lead to you thinking those were different people? I mean, i kinda tried to not seem like the same person because i thought it might annoy you or bother you if i nake it obvious that the same person sent so many questions/asks so i kinda tried to not make it obvious and ended up making it seem kinda like those were sent by different people. But i didn't mean anything bad by it.

Your blog was a safe space and a platform where i got support that i needed but without realizing it back then, i feel like i ended up taking advantage of your kindness even though i didn't mean it. I guess i was kinda desperate for support but didn't wanna bother you too much. When i had two different worries i wanted your opinions on, i just thought "well writing it in the same ask would be too long and confusing" but i also thought sending separate asks and mentioning it was me on both would make you annoyed by me? Maybe it would make you feel like i was being too demanding and maybe it would make you ignore me?

So i tried to seem like it was different people or at least not seem like the same person by changing up my way of talking/writing in different asks. Idk why i did that really. (God this sounds so wrong and embarrassing im sorry)

Oh but at first, i didn't even think about any of this. I just sent my questions then suddenly started worrying if it would be weird and if its wrong to ask more than one or two questions in different asks....then thought "oh maybe it is wrong" and did that :(

But if this bothers you, then I'm really really sorry. I didn't realise it back then but i ended up depending too much on you out of desperation and maybe unknowingly took advantage of your kindness in a way but only realized it recently. I never meant anything bad. I know this ask could either make you hate me or maybe you don't mind what i did, but either way, I'm really sorry.

I'm really sorry for that, honestly. And thank you again for all the help too. I'm very grateful. If i ever send any ask in the future, I'll try to mention it's me but if you don't want me to interact with your blog, i understand that too. Thank you for reading.

Hey Anon ❤️ I remember you! It's lovely to hear that somehow this blog helped you cope with your anxiety and overthinking. That's good progress, and you made it! 🥺🥺❤️

As for the multiple asks, I truly wasn't bothered nor annoyed. I think that you realising that it might have been a little ambiguous to make multiple asks, it's a sign of improvement and surely you'll be more comfortable with a bigger ask then "pretending" to be different people. I want you to remember more importantly something that you have said about your past: you were in a tough situation. You did the choice that you deemed best for your mental health and your needs, and even if now you acknowledge that it wasn't the best idea, it wasn't wrong or evil. You did your best with the knowledge you had.

I'm so happy you came round to share your thoughts and progress, it really warms my heart to have conversations with you and the community. We are all in this together and all of our struggles become less intimidating when there's people sharing their journey. This is true for me at least.

Anon, don't forget your vibes are good. You might struggle with anxiety and other issues but that's okay and we all are struggling with something, no one is perfect and looking down on each other is a despicable way to gain confidence. You're perfect the way you are and I love you.

P.S. sorry this answer comes so late! Have been struggling myself and now i luckily feel better ☺️

[mrcyclopsfan]

KNOWING YOUR PARTNER WELL CAN POTENTIALLY MAKE WRITING TOGETHER A LOT EASIER. ( REPOST DO NOT REBLOG ! )

Welcome!!!! 

NAME: K or Baggy on discord 

PRONOUNS: she/her

PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION:  IMs and Discord (only if we be vibin in chat alot you can ask) 

NAME OF MUSE(S): Teucer, Venti (mostly request), Yuu (Twisted Wonderland) and a few others that are used barley.

EXPERIENCE/HOW LONG (MONTHS / YEARS?):    OOh god? I think I started Rping on Tumblr at....Homeestuck hype? I was the one of the ancestors.... God.... That was so long ago...i feel so old my guys XD

PLATFORMS YOU’VE USED:  Tumblr, email (so long ago), facebook (shortlived) and Discord 

BEST EXPERIENCE: The friends I make who keep interacting with me! Thats always nice. Trading other fandoms that we haven’t explored yet.... sendin memes talking about headcannons and yeah. 

RP PET PEEVES/DEALBREAKERS: Ummm... Drama? People who get their knickers in a twist when a villain is....shock a villain. Idk I’m really here to vibe and not invite drama into my smoll world. 

FLUFF, ANGST OR SMUT:  Umm... this depends on the muse and mood. If it’s Teucer, Fluff or angst. It’ll mostly be wholesome with him though. Venti it’s.... good lord... good luck with him. It could be a Hangover moment...

PLOTS OR MEMES: Crack tbh XD i love doing nonsensical threads cause it lets us get all our sillies out and shift into other stuff. 

LONG OR SHORT REPLIES: Mood tbh, sometimes i can write paras and paras... some times i wanna do oneliners and just have dumb convos 

BEST TIME TO WRITE: Evenings or weekends. I work full time so my brain maybe dead weight and only want cracky discord idea exchange.  

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S): No not too much. Most of the time i try to put myself in their shoes. Venti is a archon with endless knowledge so I am his words more...aloof and playful.. Teucer is a kid who is sheltered so I play him as naive and attached at his big brother’s hip.  Yuu is just...chaotic dumb energy.... like...doesn’t get puns dumb but can outsmart the smartest kid on campus chaotic. 

Tagged by: @eonsadrft​ (Thank you~~~~~)  Tagging: STEAL IT YA GOOFS 

[zephyrrydrake]

Vent post. Move on if you don't want to read.

I feel like I'm failing Palestine. Idk, I just feel like I'm not doing enough. I know the world sucks, I know that it's broken and that people are dying and suffering and being tortured. I feel like I can't do enough. Like what I'm doing isn't enough.

121. That's how many asks I've let sit in my inbox for over a month. They piled up. They've just gone unanswered. I don't feel like I can delete them because I feel like I need to help them. I have a platform. It's basically a raft compared to the giant boats that are some other people's platforms, but it's still a platform. Since I was younger, the whole reason why I wanted a big platform in the first place, was so that I could use it to help people. My motivations have kind of shifted cause now I just wanna make stuff, but still.

I can't donate any money. I don't usually see a lot of these people's fundraisers getting reblogged. I think a part of me doesn't even want to do this. I know it's selfish and I should be spending my time helping people, but it's hard to care. And I hate that it's hard to care. Because I want to care. I want to want to help these people. But I'm just apathetic. I mean, I'm happy when I see their GoFundMes gaining traction and I'm happy seeing that someone met their goal. I cheered when I saw that someone got enough funds to get out of Gaza. But I just can't always psych myself up to care about all this stuff the way these people deserve to be cared about.

My feelings are complicated. I kind of feel this way towards other aspects of my life too. Honestly, it might just be an autism thing. Doesn't make me feel less guilty about it though. Or more, pseudo guilt? Because sometimes I can't even really bring myself to feel guilty. My emotions are fucked.

And then of course those two fucking gimmick blogs came out and attacked some of the people who verify fundraisers. And I decided to hear them out. And now I'm questioning if maybe these may or may not be scams. Fuck, man. Like I said in my pinned on @rydrake6 I just need a break.

I already know that my "activism" is mediocre at best. I know that I'm probably barely even doing the bare minimum. I know that I need to rethink my methods. Right now I'm just questioning whether I should even keep doing this. As I'm writing this I'm drafting a post in my head that's like "I'm sorry to say, but I'm going to make the unethical decision to stop talking about Palestine."

I don't want to. Or I don't want to want to. But it's not like I'm doing much now anyways. I'm boycotting. I'm staying away from the big corporations and I've been in multiple fights with my parents over this stuff. I've been doing clicks on that one website, even though I might have missed some days. I've been reblogging Gofundmes even though there's not a lot of people who donate because of me to my knowledge.

I just don't know what to do. That's exactly why I need time to think about this shit and get it sorted out. I wonder if it might be better for me to just step away. Just do my own thing. Figure this whole thing out. I know tumblr has a scammer problem, but I don't think that's what's going on with the majority of these gofundmes.

I'll figure something out. But for now I'm just going to keep to myself. Probably try to stay off Tumblr more. Actually, yeah. I think I'm gonna try to stay off Tumblr more. I thought this place was gonna be better than twitter but shit. Everything is falling apart. I think I'm gonna lower my scroll limit. It might just be temporary but I really need to get off of social media. It's bad for me no matter what website I use.