#idk if i even broach any issues im dealing w personally w the others its. so awkward

[torsamors]

i wish like. anyone here gave a real shit abt me at all

[superdeluxeaverage]

In a very tricky n fucked position where i need to confront my mom abt what i think is her developing a smoking habit after quitting drinking but i havd no idea how to broach it w/o seeminh accusatory n not understanding. After rehab ive returned to having a friendship w/ her n we even watched the first half of high and low by kurosawa n i showed her taking of pelthan 123 with matthau so like we have a v positive relationship again n idk how to tell her abt this w/o making her think im mad or smthn for all i kno it couldnt even be a habit n just one cigarette a day or smthn. There was a water bottle full of cigarettes but that could be over a long time. Its probably not a big deal but idk what to do like she hasnt been going to the meeting but thats cause shes always in poor health cause of other health issues that have plagued her for years but i def gotta like idk help her not completely drop going to the meetings. Of all the options smoking is the best probably compared go smthn that would fuck up her senses n impair her n stuff or something that she could deny being a addiction. I dont think shes addicted to smoking at all and if i talk to her im sure she'll think that i think shes addicted im sure she's using it as a distraction to stop any possible alcohol urges. But i alsi dont kno i cant ignore it lest it turn into a addiction n given the whole u kno cancer thing i wouldnt want her to regularly smoke. So 2mrw idk ill just have to ask her abt her progress n ask her abt it kindly very careful so that it doesnt send her back to drinking. Id rather havr her smoking than drinking cause smoking is idk v clear cut n doesnt make her uncomfortable to be around n scary pathetic but it sucks smoking is shunned in contemporary society. N its prolly something she doesnt want to get addicted to cause i remember saying she thought smoking was nasty when we were kids she used to smoke b4 whwn shr was younger but quit i think after having me or my sister or smthn i dont kno if she was addicted or just decided to quit idknowww its a v tricky subject to breach so im gonna be careful abt how i phrase it ughhh im gonna sleep on it n think abt how to approach it T-T if at all. I dont need to see myself as the person who has to solve problems but my younger sister rly acts like a asshole w/ no respect when talking abt sensitive subjects n my older sister gets very emotional abt it n im worried if she finds out she'll accuse her of lying abt quitting or acting like its a huge problem/betrayal. N my dad will prob be pissed abt it too so im just like ._.