#idk i wanna embrace all facets of my life no matter good or bad i want a complex life

[6mayhem]

prev post will be my defense if i ever do get cancelled for incest shipping. buddy i think i'm allowed to write all sorts of fucked up sibling shit after the childhood i've had ‼️

[suggers-got-dingled]

You're such a #MOOD this fandoms a mess I don't blame u for staying away honestly tho I'm like if ppl have the energy to be This Crazy™ and waste their energy over FICITON and something u can't control it's a soap ! It's so true tho I have kinda outgrown the extreme side of fandom like Robrons cute n all but when RL hits and real world problems you realise it's not worth affecting your life over it cos one day it's gonna end either by the show or you growing out of fandom

rip I was being a dramatic ass hormonal bitch the other day lmao but I am with you on the outgrowing that side of fandom thing! I feel like it’s naturally fizzled out over the past few months and my detachment to the intensely impassioned side of it has almost completely disappeared (whether this is a good or bad thing idk but it’s nice to not revolve your entire life around it, maybe when there’s a robron storyline I’m totally invested in instead of just slightly invested in, I might get my zest back who knows??!)

like I used to involve myself in and comment on every single little thing but now I just... don’t, bc I just can’t be bothered using the last bit of strength I have and I’m not particularly bothered about being so hung up on negative facets of fiction that it starts to affect your regular life (if 2017 taught me anything it was this lmao and plus I’m getting on a bit now I wanna try and step back from the overdramatics and regain a non-emmerdale fixated life even if it will follow me around til the day I die 😂)

I do totally get where people are coming from, everyone has different opinions and some will have different personal takes on the matter because of their own formative experiences! & I’m not saying people aren’t allowed to express these views and concerns because they have every right to and boy are there a lot of them! I have plenty of my own but I just don’t have it in me to go there when the topic in question is a soap - people want the absolute logically and morally correct outcome but to be completely honest, when do soap operas ever do the completely right non-problematic thing??

it’s not even that I’m not enjoying it, it’s just that I don’t particularly enjoy what inevitably comes with it like the heated discussions and targeted confrontations and aggressive clash of opinions (my anxiety doesn’t deal well with that lol i’d rather watch an hour of daz than be caught up in that and that’s saying something) 

but yeah I actually am loving the nitty gritty drama in the show and the way they’ve managed to balance it out as a whole! casting the wedding aside I’m being totally hypocritical saying I’m not invested when 4 weeks later I’m still squealing over that day but shh it was meant to be a fanbaiting fluffy one off to bask in when times get rough soaps are there for you to get joy and heartbreak and emotionally compromising exasperation out of messy af drama, they’re renown for that and I’ve grown up with that and it’s literally just a part of british culture! 

for now, though, I definitely think I will just be embracing that in my own time and company until it’s back to being calm and rational (lol is it ever?!?!), until I’m in one of my moods and get the urge to speak out bc something really irks me AND until the next stumbling block hits and I fall into the trap once again lmaooo