#idk i dont think this is what anon meant?
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I agree with your list ! People being asshole about lesbian & other headcanons gtfo! That list could work for many other things too.
But to be sure everyone don’t mix thing up i just want to point out that not liking/ not being fan of an headcanon don’t equal being an ass about it. It’s the mean actions or words afterwards that are bad.
hey! i’m glad you found it generalizable. there’s a lot of things on there that get used against pretty much any “diverse” perspectives both inside and out of fan spaces. as for your second point, i don’t disagree with you. there are some queer headcanons that i don’t personally hold, but i’m going to be cheering them on rather than contributing to the negativity we face on a regular basis. you can personally hold a different headcanon without being a jerk.
this is not @ you anon, but there are a lot of people who believe that underrepresented groups seeing themselves in characters — whether through the lens of race, gender, sexuality, disability, etc — is “politicizing” fandom and ruining it somehow, as though a white/cishet/male/abled perspective is the default in art and anything else is “tainting” the “pure” fanspace. some of them might believe those voices can exist — so long as they keep their heads down and don’t take up too much space. the fact of the matter is that’s a bigoted thing to believe. our existence has been politicized against our will. for the marginalized, fan spaces are just another front we have to push to participate in. if someone finds themself constantly disliking one specific type of queer/nonwhite/disabled/etc. headcanon and feels the need to say over and over how much they don’t like it, they ought to seriously interrogate why that is.
#anon#ask#discussion of of bigotry cw#it kinda touches on most of them bc i feel the framework im talking about here is broad enough to apply generally#idk i dont think this is what anon meant?#but like. i feel there is a difference between having a different pov and actively openly disliking smth#i actually find utena tenjou to be a good example of this#utena is very ambiguous in both gender & sexuality as a character#ive seen all varieties of headcanons for her and all sorts of people relating to her#from trans men to nb people to butch cis women. lesbians bi folks pan folks ace folks etc#and i dont think any of those perspectives are wrong#i think shes a transmasc lesbian because i’m a transmasc lesbian and the show cracked my egg lol#but i dont think that means that like. transfem ppl are Wrong to relate to her. i don’t think it means bi ppl are wrong to relate to her.#i dont think hcing her as those things are wrong either#but if someone comes out and says people are wrong and bad and annoying for existing with those povs?? shut up#and when those ppl crop up they are usually trying to argue a character is more Normative#ex: gender conforming. straight. cis. white. etc.#so yes dont be an asshole over headcanons but being an asshole to queer hcs almost always looks very different#bc its usually built on bigoted foundations
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Two ships that always confuse the hell out of me when I see them are raven x Damian and cass x superboy. I know the Damian and raven came from the animated movies but i don’t really read enough comics to know where cass and superboy came from
Cass and superboy come from batgirl (2000) cass' first solo run and its a very weird ship even then very awkward I'm not even sure if it was meant to be taken seriously considering how weird it felt and how little time they ended up being together for - damian and raven is terrible imo as a ship since they only seemed to age raven down so they could make her and damian into a romantic thing and thar just urks me
#ask#anon#they were really trying to give tims teen titans to damian#but also dicks???#but that also was bc they really wanted to do the judas contract for some reason#idk i hated the animated movies universe so im a bit bias#like i get why some decisions were made#but forced romance is a pet peeve of mine#i do think cass and kon made sense tho#i get what they were trying to do there#but i still dont think they were meant to be a serious couple
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If you were a chulip character how would players kiss you?
find and present to me a working copy of Dragon Ball Z Budokai 1 for the PlayStation 2 and you can kiss my stupid ass
#ask#anon#for a more serious and personal answer. idk i imagine you'd have to see and accept me at my weirdest. otherwise NO kisses. NO love.#you cannot 100% the game if you cannot accept me for the weird fucked slop i am#i also deal 98 hearts of damage if you fuck it up. and i wont appear for 30 ingame days. need time to recover.#best hope you didnt leave me as one of the last citizens you had to kiss#you could savescum i guess to bypass the wait time#but deep down id know#the only character in chulip to have a mr resetti mechanic#another silly answer would be that youd have to find a working beta of tf2 with grenades still intact. but thats impossible im afraid.#but even then i dont think i feel that attatched to the beta. its just the researcher in me who wants to see how the viewmodels look#like we know what the dynamite packs viewmodel looks like. but not really anything else im afraid.#we have an idea of what some viewmodels wouldve included with their model#like the bear trap has an unused portion of its UV sheet that displays what wouldve likely been meant to be a chain#so i wonder how a chain wouldve been adapted with the beartraps viewmodel#like is it a cluster of them on the end of the chain and the scouts spinning it.#or is the viewmodel of one with a chain wrapped around the jaws to help its viewmodel have a more solid silhouette#the frag grenade has what i assume to be the uv portion of a pin#im just fascinated by scrapped content i think.#anyway thank you for the ask anon#i kinda wish i had a game i couldve listed with a funnier title but. dbz budokai is the one that sticks out in my mind
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i know you dont know all these people but press is acting strange
https://www.tumblr.com/thepressanon/738561269597143040/smile-smile-for-the-camera-for-the-people-for
you can check it out if you want
... huh. It's an interesting, if concerning, first impression, I suppose... Hope he's alright?
Nice poem though.
...
Is the incorrect their intentional?
#(ooc: THE THEIR THING IS JUST WHAT I THINK SHE WOULD SAY SO EXTREMELY SORRY IF THAT COMES ACROSS RUDE???)#(ooc: it has interesting implications if it is though! i think anyway. i dont keep up with the anon stuff super well i dont think but i +#+ am someone who likes to do funky things like that so it is absolutely not meant as like a criticism of any sort?)#(ooc: just really feel the need to stress that)#(ooc: formatting may change also. idk. we'll see.)#pine.txt#asks#anon#rp#kim pine#sp comic#spvtwtg#spto#spvtw#?#(leaving the ? incase I would like to tag press anon. I dont believe he's been on my blog himself like as an asker so he doesn't have +#(+ a tag from me currently)#(ooc: also sorry for the slight delay with this shortass response! m inecraft....)#(ooc: also just eating actually. im eating and spectating someone on my server lol)#(ooc: you know what kim would also not be asking this rudely. like her tone is probably a little rude bc it's her but she would also be +)#(+ wondering if it was intentional from like a literary analysis standpoint ya know?)#(ooc: also it is so funny answering this and then seeing what's going on other places kffjdhdjfhd i love this truly)
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apparently there's going to be a james baldwin biopic... what do we think
i think im. slightly worried
#there are sooo many biopics nowadays it is wall to wall biopics out there. biopics and live action remakes and marvel films that’s all…..#specifically though i dont think it’s inherently bad or anything but I’m just. the worry comes from how often these biopics are not good and#their portrayals of the people they are meant to be about lack. sensitivity or respect or accuracy because it’s#lost beneath the motivation to churn out another famous persons life story in order to make money from it#case and point i will. NEVER forgive them for what they did to Nina Simone#idk i think in general there are. too many biopics being made nowadays and too often they are. exploitative and not good but I’m also not a#film guy so. in terms of this one uhh. i guess we’ll see?#telegram#anon#idk I love james baldwin i think absolutely he deserves celebration. is a biopic the way to do this. genuinely idk#*case in. oh nevermind
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can you please tag your self reblogs?
so you could block them? no
#i think i tag the ones that i have more to say than just a simple ‘sr’#like when theyre from maybe at least a month back#but the stuff i bump up for different timezone exposure obvs wont have it so ppl cant block it 🤣#i mean what if it was ur fandom and u just blocked everything i sr’d 😩 it’s 4 u yk#anyway just imagine it was from someone else who rb’d me it isnt that hard seeing my stuff again unless you hate them#but idk why you would be here#asks#anonymous#i will tag them with ‘url dont look’ if you get off of anon :D#oH and if youre a consistent reblogger then MAYBE i can actually do it just for you 🥴💕#not rly in the best mood this morning and what i see is someone telling my stuff to fck off :((#*cries in tumblr flop creator* 🙄#if this was meant as a polite request. you could do better anon
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PARENTAL PENGU I ARRIVE WITH GOOD NEWS; I got Scaramouche >:3
I saved up 50 wishes before the update and lost it to Mona (MONA!!!! I almost have all her cons now), I kept wishing and got all the cons for Gorou and the other character, and i got like 3 of Faruzan.
He didnt come home on my birthday or christmas but instead just after playing with my friend I wished AND HE CAME HOME
But i don't have enough handguards saved up 😔👊
-Lucky
OOO GRATS LUCKY!! JUST IN TIME (i think? I went to go visit my family over the Christmas break so I haven't looked at tumblr in a while). Istg I hear so many people get scammed by qiqi but I'm the mona havers gang. I would put unwanted in that name but I kinda like her. Mainly because every 1M ONESHOT BUILD has mona, bennett, and kazua lol. That's honestly what I'm hoping for me because I do not have the funds for Alhaitham and...I want him. But that sounds very in character for him lol, tho I'm glad u got some faruzan constellations if you're planning on adding her to your scara team.
SPEAKING OF HANDGUARDS. I AM STARVED OF THEM AND GOD, RUNNING AROUND THE WORLD FOR THE MOBS IS HORRIBLE. My scara sits there uncrowned because I don't want to fight for him.
Also, glad to see nothing has changed
#lucky#lucky anon#im telling you i have all the materials to make him a god#i just dont want to get more handguards#also for christmas i got this shirt#but uh they shipped me the wrong size#was supposed to be a small but they gave me a 2x#and ngl im not super big on fashion or clothes and I'm also really dumb#so idk what the fuck a 2x meant and just said uh sure#idk if sizes are the same everywhere ik shoe sizes arent#because im ASSUMING 2x means an xl+? but for me that would be a xxl#rather than a 2x#like i said i dont know shit about sizing outside of s m l xl#so i looked at a 2x and said i think this is right maybe its some European sizing like how shoe sizes are different#and just assumed that i had a small#but its fucking massive on me and I'm like ???? what the fuck#super duper big mwah#lovely anon#anon ask
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maybe because not everyone has to cater to black and brown readers? if i feel excluded then talk to ur black and brown writers bc why tf would (for ex.) white writers write black readers when…when they aren’t?? yall aren’t victims write ur own shit if u care so much like idk what to tell u but not everyone has to bow down and write the way you want them too.
The fact that this is what you got from me saying that POC feel excluded from fandom is...insane.
I hesitate to even answer this because you sound stupid as hell, but since I think other people need to get this shit through their skulls as well:
If you are a writer, and you claim to be writing an "x reader" fanfic for a character you like, the general consensus is that "reader" in this situation should be neutral for the most part. Sure, there's different versions of that ( "x fem reader", "x masc reader", etc.") , but generally, the idea is that "reader" in this situation could be anyone, yes? A lot of writers on this app and others, write "reader" as if tiny white women are the default.
And you know what?
If you wanna write that way, fine, but say that. If you so desprately want to write about Abby Anderson fucking a 5ft nothing white girl with blonde hair and green eyes - write that. But don't call that shit an "x reader" when you know its a self insert meant to exclude everybody that doesnt look like you. Dont claim to be a safe place for all readers if when POC say they feel excluded from the things you write, you say stupid shit like what this anon just did. If your shit is labeled "x reader" with no other warnings, one should be able to assume that they arent going to see any specifics about body type, hair textures, skin color or eye color - but no. Thats not the case.
I swear, every time we bring this shit up you bitches act like we killed your fucking grandma. If you dont wanna write in a way that everyone can consume, fine, but dont make it seem as if petite white girls are just the default human in every scenario. Theres a content warning over every fic, if you dont want to see how problematic it is to write as if whiteness is the default then the least you could do it leave a big fat warning in that little "CW" section to let us know that you didnt write this with the existence of people that dont look like you in mind.
Oh, and I do write my own stuff btw. Don't ever come in my inbox with this bullshit again. Pissing me off first thing in the morning😒
#tlou2#lesbian#wlw#abby anderson#☆kennie's rambles#abby anderson x reader#ellie x reader#ellie williams#abby tlou2#please get a fucking grip#i hope you stub your toe#sevika x reader#abby x reader
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his “coming out” should not be in any way shape or form be connected to jungkook. idk why you shippers can’t leave them tf alone when they’re not dating ffs.
[Select.font=sarcasm]
Oooh I am so glad you came here to tell me this, Anon! You are clearly well informed on both Jimin’s life, and "coming out".
I didn't even know that "coming out" needs to be in inverted commas. Thank you for helping me understand.
I also didn't know what his "coming out" should or should not be! I didn't know there were rules for "coming out"! I'm so grateful to have this information now.
I hope you've also told Jimin how he should "come out"?
I hope he listens to you since obviously, you have his happiness at heart.
Because "coming out" with no significant other to support him - and facing the inevitable repercussions alone - that would DEFINITELY make things better for him, right?
Also we all know how much Jimin LOVES being alone, so naturally we should wish that for him.
Objectively, he would be happier if he was single I guess? Because having a secure and healthy long term relationship with someone who loves and supports you is known to be pretty shit. Makes sense... that's why nobody looks for love. They certainly don't write songs about love.
Ever.
People aspire to being isolated, like Jimin showed us this with his song Serendipity.
When he sang "just let me love you" he probably meant he wanted to be single and live alone forever in his bubble. That makes sense.
And of course they aren't dating!
You're right, there's absolutely nothing special between Jimin and Jungkook. They are 100% platonic and good pals.
It would be ridiculous to look at them and see love and intimacy.
I dont know what love looks like, but this is not it...
Definitely not this either.
Just friends here.
So friendly!
Brothers even!
Keeping to the bro code here too, 100%
Absolutely no crossing of boundaries here....
I always caress my friend's clothes when I sing their own love song back to them. Especially when my face is less than a foot from their face. It's very platonic.
Anyway, there's no reason to think they might be dating.
Why would people even think they COULD be?
It's unimaginable.
Society has never ignored or dismissed loving romantic relationships between same-sex couples, and that's certainly not what you're doing. Not at all. You just know they aren't dating because ... reasons.
I'm sure you don't object to Jimin being gay because that would be homophobic (you even know how he should "come out"). If that was the case you might as well just get a tattoo of an L on your forehead and throw away all your Jimin merch because our boy is gayer than a rainbow cake. Gayer even than the rainbow cake his appa has *always in stock* in his coffee shop in Busan.
And if you generously tolerate his gayness, i imagine you will allow that one day he could date (definitely not now, because he probably has no interest in sex. He's too busy working and anyway he has ARMY to love him) yeah, but not now please.
But one day he could have a nice boyfriend who sits beside him on the sofa and smiles benignly and holds his hand like a good boy.
Definitely NOT one that sings about fucking night after night seven days a week, or watching in 3D, or DEAR GOD... the imagery... champagne confetti.
Not someone who sings Sam Smith songs on his Live, or who goes around whacking off fire hydrants in his music videos or miming blow jobs on national tv.
Not someone that demands you see him as an adult who enjoys adult things and wont accept your judgement of him. Not one who puts boundaries in place.
Not someone who (the audacity!) lies in bed naked and begs Jimin to come over.
And that brings us to the villain of our story:
JEON JUNGKOOK
I guess, since you will allow a relationship in theory, you just object to the idea of a relationship specifically with Jungkook.
And I can see why. Jungkook very obviously has no interest in Jimin’s happiness. Jungkook doesn't support him at all.
He doesn't hold jimin when he cries, he doesn't spam us with Jimin content when Jimin has a comeback, he doesn't cook Jimin’s favourite food for him, or fold his underpants while he does his own laundry.
He doesn't take him on trips to Japan, or send thirst-trap messages for his birthday, or play his songs, or sing on his albums.
He doesn't carry him, bridal style, any time Jimin jumps into his arms, and I can guarantee you that he doesn't let Jimin fuck him just the way Jimin likes it, as often as he wants it, wherever and whenever he gets the chance. And vice versa.
They didn't enlist in the military as companions, after all.
So reallly, what would Jungkook even know about Jimin's happiness?
What could he POSSIBLY know about Jimin that you don't know. Nothing, right?
What could POSSIBLY happen behind closed doors and away from the camera, that you don't see with your third eye and your vivid imagination? Again, nothing. You know ALL, right?
[Deselect.font=sarcasm]
I think we've covered everything?
Theres only one thing left to say i guess.
Whoever you are, you'd do well to consider whose happiness you're supporting.
If you don't support what makes Jimin happy, you don't support Jimin. Period.
#jeon jungguk#park jimin#jikook#kookmin#국민#true love#jungkook#bts jimin#solo stans can kiss my ass#would you know love?
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How do you think the digital circus crew would react to a new member who genuinely to want to stay and doesn't want to leave at all?
TADC cast x reader who doesnt wanna leave the circus !
i lied about the previous post being the nights last post, imma spit out one more before i call it a night!! hope this is okay anon, this one may be a little on the short side; maybe.. i always write these notes before everything and forget to edit them accordingly
wrote this as general reactions instead of platonic/romantic/whatever relationship stuff! i like to imagine reader says this when the topic of trying to find an exit comes up... like imagine the atmosphere the looks the !!
CAINE:
hey i mean, hes not gonna stop you from not leaving! caines part is a little weird, since ive seen so many theories on his whole deal and i like them all, i cant settle on just one idea and roll with it... i think he would be thrilled that you want to stay, though.. doesnt have to remind you there is no escape because youre not interested in it... i think he would casually ask why you dont want to leave, though, its not often he finds someone whos content, at least not content without the loss of hope
POMNI:
she was the one who brought up trying to find an exit, again.. she kind of just looks at you with confusion written all over her face. she asks you if you meant that you have given up on trying to escape. you assure her that you just dont want to leave, giving up has nothing to do with it. she just gapes her mouth, before closing. blinks twice, and just asks why. why stay in a program like this? you cant provide an answer that seems to appease her, though... definitely some weird and confused looks from her
RAGATHA:
she doesnt know what to think of it. ragatha herself has come to terms with her position. like sure if there were a plan to escape that truly seemed like it would work, i think she would jump on it and try to leave.. i dont think she would pry you for answers, she believes you have your own personal reasons
JAX:
honestly i dont think he would care, assuming this is as i said in the note above where the topic of escape comes up and you guys arent dating or like best friends. i mean its your life and hes not going to argue with you, if you wanna be stuck in this shithole thats your business. oddly enough doesnt use it as ammo against you, though, and he bullies everyone over just about anything... maybe he cant come up with a cool nickname that makes sense, or otherwise find a way to make fun of you... but. idk
KINGER:
i think kinger would like to escape but i think he just accepted hes going to be stuck here forever. now if he had someone to fight for and be with and they wanted to leave, he would follow them. otherwise hes content with staying put because he doesnt have much incentive or desire remaining to leave. being there for years and seeing so many people fall does that to a person
ZOOBLE:
very similar to jax, in the case that its your business, of course this is assuming you guys arent close to one another. theyre not going to lecture you on how to go about your life. nothing to say here that wasnt already said in jax's segment
GANGLE:
gives you a soft and meek "but why" when you speak up to the group that you dont plan on leaving when pomni brings the topic up. you offer a shrug, or just say you dont want to leave. true utter confusion, and in a dark way believes that you prefer this world over the real one; even when your memories are smeared and burned, if any remain at all
#tadc x reader#the amazing digital circus x reader#digital circus x reader#caine x reader#pomni x reader#ragatha x reader#jax x reader#kinger x reader#zooble x reader#gangle x reader
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HII!!! how are you?? i love your writing so much‼️‼️ i have an actual question and then a request for fic or yk what i mean?
the question is do you take anons? like emoji anons so like you know whos who while stillmbeing able tl be anonymous? if you do could i be one? and if i can be an emoji anon could i be 🪐? (im just writing all this on one ask so it wont be a hassle yk?)
and as for the request i was wondering if you could write hobie with a fem reader (can be gender neutral idc) who love’s physical touch but has sensory issues/overloads where sometimes even when like just holding hands they random tuck their hand away and get annoyed or irritated from all kinds of physical touch but still love it? idk how to explain it all that well😓😓 like the reader’s love language is physical touch but they dont ask for it and mostly think they dont deserve it due to being touch starved and now that hobie came along they love the touch but the sensory issues/overloads make it harder??
im so sorry if this is confusing🙏🏼🙏🏼 also you dint have tk write this if you dont want to its completely understandable!! love your work sm‼️
take care🫶🏼
HIII IM SORRY THIS GOT LOST COMPLETELY, HI 🪐 ANON ILY !! i absolutely will take emoji anons i love all my little anon/requesters ur all angels
sensory issues r icky!!! i struggle with them massively, especially in relationships – i get it!! this is a safe space for anything like that, and any neurodivergent readers/requesters!! i love u all
hobie x reader w sensory issues!!
- initially, he’d be defensive about it
- as in the very first time you denied his touch, purely because he’d be convinced you’re mad at him.
wringing your wrists, you breathed a shaky sigh of relief as peace restored itself in your head, sitting yourself down on your sofa, letting yourself relax. it’d been a tough day, with even tougher emotions, and your chest burnt with tension, skin crawling at the feeling of your jumper against it. movement sounded somewhere in the apartment, but you ignored it, just allowing yourself a moment of peace.
until, you felt a hand slide itself into yours, the sofa dipping in weight as hobie threw himself next to you. a conflicted wave of emotions hit you, immediate comfort filling your chest at the feeling of your dear boyfriends touch after a long day – but your skin surged with irritation, brain overwhelming itself with noise, causing you to rip your hand away.
“darlin’?” hobie’s voice was small, concern lacing it’s words.
“i-i just need to be alone, hobie,” you avoided his gaze, pushing yourself up off the sofa and heading to your room. he followed, not unlike a lost puppy, wracking his brain to see if maybe he’d upset you.
“did i do somethin’, y/n?” his tone was sterner, almost defensive.
“no, no, i just–” you sighed, hands shaking slightly as you attempted to surprise the growing annoyance in your chest, “i just need a little space, i need to be on my own right now.”
- he would take your words completely differently, thinking you meant space from him
- but once you explained that it wasn’t him specifically, purely just your brain deciding that hey! now everything suddenly feels disgusting and fills you with ungodly rage, he was a lot more considerate & understanding.
- took him a little while, purely because he was obsessed with your touch, literally drunk off it most days.
- his natural stance was with you, leant against you or arm suspended over your shoulders, so it took him some time to get used to that not happening occasionally.
- he’d learn little ways to ask you if it’s okay
- mostly, he would just outright ask “a’right if i touch you, pretty?” and wait for your answer patiently
- but if you’re out and about, or maybe with others, and he can see that you’re overwhelmed and possibly even verbally shutdown, he had a little routine:
- he’d be subtle with it, tapping his own knee or a subtle wave to catch your eyeline, and once you were watching, he’d interlock his own hands, a questioning look in his eye.
- if you nodded, he’d be all over you, content with the feeling of you
- if you shook your head, or averted his gaze, he’d simply smile, and wait patiently for you to come to him
- more than anything, he just wants to learn from you – learn what you like, what you don’t like, how he can help when you’re overwhelmed, if he even can, etc.
- he’d be sooooo patient my god
- he’d literally wait for hours, even longer if it meant you would be comfortable and happy
he’s just happy to have u by his side and call you his!! he doesn’t mind if he can’t touch you all the time, and he never takes any outbursts or bad moods to heart, he understands it’s hard for you
if other people weren’t as understanding, though — maybe friends draping themselves over you, hugging you, nudging you, etc. when your sensory issues were more prevalent, he’d be the first one to your defense
bonus:
if you had verbal shutdown, he’d carry around a little notepad in his pockets at all times, even when you’re not around (he just got used to carrying it). he likes seeing the little drawings and doodles you do, little kisses you put on the page for him when you can’t express it yourself physically, or verbally.
he just loves u a lot.
#🪐 anon#hobie brown#hobie brown x reader#hobie brown imagine#hobie brown fanfiction#hobie brown x you#hobie x reader#hobie#hobie my beloved#hobie spiderverse#atsv hobie#hobie x you#hobie headcanons#astv hobie#spiderpunk#across the spiderverse#spider punk x reader#spider punk x you#spider punk
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HIII I FOLLOWED U RECENTLY AND IM LITERALLY JUST BLOWN AWAY BY UR WORKS I LOVE THEMMN
okay listen listen listen. what are ur thoughts on enemies to lovers w dan heng.
OR OR OR WITH GEPARD (idk how thatll work but the idea is very appealing to me AHUEHDUE)
(also i saw it was ur birthday yesterday!! happy belated birthday 🥳🥳 stay healthy n safe, dont forget to hydrate and eat :D)
- idk can i be 😟 anon (my face 24/7 LMAO)
↳ pairing : (seperate) gepard landau & dan heng x gender neutral reader
↳ synopsis : request ♡
↳ authors note : dan hengs is more or less a joke bc i genuinely couldnt think of much for him im SORRYANSBDNS thank you smmm for the sweet messages they rlly warm my heart
☆☆ ONE BED TROPE ⁉️
When the peace between the Overworld and Underworld was established, you and Gepard both agreed that it didn't mean that suddenly you and him were buddy-buddy now. However, with Seele and Bronya becoming allies, it meant that you and Gepard were more often than not being assigned to work side by side.
And with that arrangment coming along, that's what brought you here. In an abandoned building, sitting on a bed with Gepard kneeling between your legs as he bandaged your bruises. "You know, if anyone sees this the angle looks really-"
"Shut up."
You smirk at his fluster, seeing the slight shade of pink that he tries to hide. In return, he not so nicely pulls on the bandages around you, tightening them in a way that was nearly suffocating. "Ow!-"
You won't deny that Gepard was an insanely pretty man, his soft skin and gentle features complimented his.. annoyingly kind soul for those who needed his assistance. He was loved by many, and you couldn't really blame people. Just cause you both were on opposite sides didn't mean you couldn't acknowledge his determination to protect others.
"Your injuries are fatal. We can move by morning, just rest for now."
You look around the room, mostly to ignore how he takes off his heavy armor to to rest properly. "You know it's.. there's only one relatively comfortable place to sleep in, right? Or in other words.. there's only one bed?"
Gepard nods with a sigh, your eyes finally turning back to him as he tries to lay on the floor and use his arm as a pillow. "Yeah. And you're hurt, so you can have it."
He ignores your pitiful stare, closing his eyes until he hears you clear your throat and opening one of them slightly. "It's.. cold. And there's.. enough room."
"Oh? And won't this look like a suggestive-"
"Shut up!"
You ignore his laughter as he stands up, feeling him ruffle your hair as you look up at him. "Asshole. Just.. sleep, will you?"
"Gladly. If it means I won't have to look at your face anymore."
"You know I'm pretty." "Maybe, but you're infuriating."
"Wait, what?"
☆☆ BITTER EXES WHO HUNTS THE OTHER DOWN
Maybe that description was a little detailed, but wouldn't it be funny if you were DAN HENG's ex and you were so pissed at him you joined the Stellaron Hunters. Blade himself started hating him a little more after hearing you rant about him for the 10th time in a day. (He's more pissed that he made you that way and now has to deal with it.)
So when you caught up to him in Luofu, even if you swore to Blade you wouldn't do anything until his business with Dan Heng was over, you just couldn't resist just having a little bite. Just for your own enjoyment.
"How have you been?" "I've been better, especially since you're holding a knife to my throat and pinning me against a wall."
You scoff at his remark while pushing the blade closer towards his neck, not quite enough to cut but grazing his skin to a point he can feel the cold metal. "Shut up."
"Good to know you're still angry at me."
"Why wouldn't I be? You left me with nothing but a poorly written note that had nothing but 'Goodbye.' on it."
That got a little reaction out of him which was him clearing his throat. "Seems like you haven't forgotten either."
"No it's more.. did you not see the other one I left you?" "There was another??"
You and him exchange awkward glances, you eventually pull the knife away from his neck and take a few steps back.
"If it matters at all, you're still really pretty."
"Seriously, now of all times I-"
You laugh a little, causing the familiar feeling of Dan Heng's heart skipping a beat as he looks off to the side. "..Whatever. Just because we had this.. whatever this was, it doesn't mean you're off the hook. You're still gonna be a dead man, I promise you that much."
Dan Heng watched you leave the shadows, until you were out of sight was when he laughed a little. "It's a little odd I found that stupidly attractive but.." He shrugs to himself, not like anyone will know.
#˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥ bailu's candy stash#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader#dan heng x reader#dan heng hsr x reader#gepard landau x reader#gepard x reader
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I am deeply invested in the idea where the reader does something to severely piss Simon off, like it gets to a point where he has to step away to cool his head. So he just ends up grabbing her by the back of her neck and roughly jerking her towards Johnny’s cage and shoving her in it.
She goes to open her mouth— only Simon shakes his head slowly and crouches down in front of the cage. He watches them with dark eyes, radiating anger and it’s enough to get reader to be quiet, heart racing in their chest.
Simon tells them that if they speak without permission then he’ll gag them. Reader watches in confusion as he just chucks a thin blanket over the cage and just leaves.
Readers panicked at this point because Simon was the predictable one, Simon had a pattern— one he wasn’t following. Instead he’s set one rule for them, leaving them unbalanced, hesitant and scared. They don’t want to test him, not with the cold way he looked at them. So they do what he says and sit quietly without saying a word. Eventually you drift off.
(Simon checks you later, something softening just slightly at when he pulls the sheet back a bit to see you fast asleep. He muses to himself that he’ll have to get another muzzle, one your size.
Meanwhile he has to come up with a suitable punishment and waits for Johnny to get home.)
Is 🍋 anon taken?
hahahahahaha oh my FUCKING god
sometimes i think maybe i blacked out and sent these anons to myself. you plucked this directly from my brain lemon
you've been getting more comfortable with them, which means you enter the next stage of training - making sure you walk that good behavior-bad behavior line. they want you to be you still, but they do also have a bit of a 24/7 bdsm dynamic going on which means no pushing the disrespect too far. it's how simon and johnny functioned, so it's how you function in their dynamic too
you've "preferred" simon since the start of your captivity just because he's somewhat predictable - which is entirely intentional on his part. if you know he'll react, you'll know how to act. but whatever you did to simon (dont ask idk) pushes him firmly past his tolerance and he just snaps. treats you like he does johnny
forces you to the floor, drags you by your hair behind you and practically throws you into johnny's crate (too big for you, in his mind. the cage is meant to be constricting but it's practically roomy for you) and can't slow his heaving breaths. hunches over the cage and stares right into your eyes, snarls that if you can't sit in time out and shut up he'll muzzle you, leave you in there til the next morning no matter what. throws a thick blanket over the crate and leaves you in the dark
comes back what must be hours later, a little calmer now. tugs the blanket off and looks down at your trembling form with a tightness around his lips. feeds you dinner through the bars with his fingers, lets you sip from a water bottle a little. covers you back up. ignores whatever you try and says, doesn't say a word in return
the next time the blanket is lifted it's johnny, crouching onto the floor in front of you so you're on eye level. looks real sympathetic but also real condescending :( coos to you to hold on til morning, he'll give you all the cuddles you want when your punishment is over. simon snaps at him to get in bed unless he wants to spend the night with you
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ok, so i’m having a thought rn. bear with me please, my writing sucks :(
kinda spitballing but i can’t help but imagining what it would be like for reader the first time she meets JJ’s dad. like, obv he’d never willing introduce them. but i kinda like to think maybe Luke would show up to their shared apartment (thinking JJ lived their alone) and is so surprised when he sees reader. like “who the hell is this??”
and ofc JJ would be so protective and shielding the reader from Luke like “don’t talk to her” or whatever. idk, what’s your take on this?? <3
(also, i love your writing so much and if it’s not taken, can I be 🪐 anon?)
˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚
he had no idea who you were, but you knew him.
the man who’s made jj’s life hell, leaving him bruised and broken from years on end until he could finally free himself of the curse that was luke. you’d happily opened the door to your shared apartment, smile dropping as soon as you were confronted with the man. even your blood ran cold.
“the fuck are you?” he frowns, swaying a little— clearly drunk.
“i think you may have the wrong address, sorry…” you lie, going to close the door— hoping it was enough to rid of him but he slams a clammy hand against it, holding it open.
“wait, nah — you got a jj maybank here?”
jj had heard his fathers voice, it was a voice he could recognise anywhere and froze in place in the kitchen — momentarily immobilised. what quickly got him moving, was the thought of you having to deal with him, and the blonde quickly arrived beside you, placing a hand on your waist to gently but firmly pull you behind him. luke’s eyes followed the movement, piecing together the fact you were a couple.
“what the hell are you doin’ here?” jj clenches his jaw, holding it high as he looks down his nose at the man who hadn’t changed in years if you minus a few extra grey hairs.
“that any way to greet your old man? what, not g’nna invite me in?” he grins a yellowed smile and you cringe, shrinking back behind jj when the man ogles you for a reaction. jj stands even taller upon seeing this.
“how’d you find my place, pops?” jj stares down at the man’s soaked tank top, the smell of liquor radiating from it fuelled by body heat.
“asked around. this place ain’t so big, you know. anywho, i need a place to stay. just for a few days whilst i get my shit together, crashed the old boat — need to spend some time on land gettin’ a new one. i got a guy comin’ up to see me tomorrow who’s gonna help me with—”
“dad, you can’t stay here.” jj cuts him off, and for a moment you see that same scared little boy inside him, a look of fear flashing across his face. he presses his lips together as his father squints at him.
“and why the hell not? you think you’re fancy now huh—” he starts to raise his voice, but jj cuts him off once more.
“because this is my place. with my girl, and my life. you think you can just show up here after years and treat me like i’m some hotel? nah.” he scoffs out a laugh, shaking his head. “i helped you out for the last time on that dock when you left and i told myself never again, dad. i meant it. leave… now.”
luke shakes his head in disbelief, laughing at the boy in a way clearly meant to belittle him. soon, his drunken gaze finds you once more.
“and what about you doll? hell i might be your father in law one day, will benefit you to be nice to me.” he smiles at you, taking a step closer but jj shoves him back so suddenly he stumbles and falls onto his ass.
“dont talk to her. dont come near her, dont even look at her. get the hell off my property, dad. i mean it.” jj barks, doubling down as he stares down the weak alcoholic on the ground. the old man sniffs, ungraciously picking himself up after a minute, sizing up the blonde.
“‘think i won’t beat your ass like i used to just ‘cos your little girlfriends here?”
your hand finds jj’s arm, stroking the back of it soothingly as if trying to ground him from that traumatic memory. he stares his father down with nothing but disgust.
“go ahead, pops. i’ll just let the cops know where you’re at. would be a real shame to see you back in the clink.”
knowing he’s lost, luke finally leaves and jj stares off at him until he’s certain he’s out of sight and gone for good. exhaling shakily, he shuts the door softly, leaning against it.
“jayj.” you speak softly and he shakes his head, dismissing you with a watery smile and a hand.
“nah i’m good. showed him who’s boss, huh?” he chuckles, but accidentally lets a tear slip down his cheek. before he gets the chance to wipe it, you throw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around his neck, listening to him sniffle a little against you.
“you did good jayj. did so good.”
˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚
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Currently thinking about Bubs with this annoying kid in one of her classes that keeps flirting with her. The guy doesn’t have to be creepy or anything, he just doesn’t know how to take a hint, plus we all know bubs is probably too anxious to tell him an outright ‘no’. So her just ranting to her dad about this when Logan overhears and he’s just PISSED at this rando
Also could I perhaps be 🪭 anon? (Get it, cause I’m a FAN of your works, wink wink nudge nudge)
bub is just, “yeah he asked me out to the movies but i dont know if he meant it in a date way or a hangout way idk it’s very weird and idk what to think about it”
logan’s ears perk up at the thought of some rando boy asking his bub out on a date like absolutely not???? he’s probably just using you bc you’re smart and he’s a bum you deserve so much better than some college boy
also thats so cute u can absolutely be 🪭 anon
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Running
Yet another character I’m writing for, I guess…
Answering an anonymous request even if I was planning on writing something like this anyway: ‘aaahhh i saw that you were opening request for the darkling but i dont have any original ideas for him i just want to comfort him and have a softer aleksander idk i JUST NEED COMFORT like having the darkling breaking down over something and the reader comforting him and just loads of fluff i need him so baaad’
Thank you so much for your request, anon! Changed it a little bit, but I hope you’ll like it anyway!
Going to use Ben as the physical description for him although I’m going to use some character traits that are a mix of book and show, because… you know me by now, do I really need to give you a reason for this artistic choice? I don’t think so.
I loved the idea in the book (that was not used enough in the show in my opinion) that Aleksander’s amplifying abilities were a threat for his life, because he was a target for Grisha too. So… I used it a bit here, I love that detail. Adds to the whole tragic of his character, I reckon.
Anyways! I hope you all like this fic! Tell me what you think about it!
****
Pairing: The Darkling x reader
Warnings: Blood, mentions of war and violence, angst, hurt/comfort, pretty sad…
Summary: After a particularly violent battle, only a handful of soldiers remain. The aftermath is difficult for everyone, while you travel across the country in search of a safe place. Even the most stoic ones can show weakness sometimes…
Word count: 3472
Masterlist
It was cold.
It was dark, but that was a good thing, it meant that you were hidden.
It was cold, strong wind coming from the Fjerdan border up North, blowing and howling through the tall pine trees.
It was night time, stars lighting up the sky, a shy moon only in its first quarter. So far up North, there could have been Northern Lights. But not tonight.
Tonight was for grieving, not admiring.
You were exhausted. You were in shock. You were still bleeding.
And yet, there was a man before you, a friend, Andrei was his name. Lying in the young snow, tainting the white ice with crimson blood. The liquid fumed, warmth against the cold. The irony sent of blood against the resin of the pine trees.
There was a friend lying before you, bleeding, on the verge of dying, and you were the only one who could save him. The wound that crossed his abdomen was deep though, and you were no Healer.
Heartrender. You were trained to fight, not to mend. This was only a secondary use of your power to you. But then again, you had no choice, there was no Healer left alive in your army.
An army? What a joke. There was but a handful left of you. Most of them wounded, just like you were. You were part of the lucky ones though, you had but a only a flesh wound. It was painful, and made you weaker than your usual self, but your life was not endangered by the cut across your thigh. You limped though, for travelling, it wasn’t the best…
Andrei seemed to choke on his own blood, the barrier you had created to keep the rushing blood out of his lungs breaking for a mere second, but it was enough. You focused, sweat glistening across your dirty forehead under the silvery starlight. You took a deep breath, trying to focus, but you were too tired, too unexperienced to treat such a serious wound…
He was the tenth man you were healing tonight. Your whole body was shaking from the strain of it all by now.
The gurgling noise drew worried glances and blank ones your way, and you tried to ignore them all, these soldiers of the Second Army, who had fought and survived out of pure luck, just like you had.
This idiot of a King had sent you right into a trap. You stood no chance…
You blinked your tears away as images of the battle flashed before your eyes. Bodies falling, hands moving in the air for summoning, the loud pangs of gunpowder detonating, the grunts, the shouts and the scent of blood and sweat and urine heavy in the air, and blank stares turned to the sky that would never see again…
You felt your power wavering, but you forced yourself to focus on Andrei again. Because he was not dead. And despite your exhaustion, you could still save him… maybe it was a fool’s hope, but no one could survive without hope…
“Will he make it?”
The deep voice behind you made you jump, and you turned to look up at the Darkling.
Tall figure standing before the moon. The silvery light coming through the branches made some kind of hallo around him.
He was covered with mud, blood and ashes too. Just like everyone else. He was dishevelled, his black kefta partially torn apart, with dark circles under his even-darker eyes. He looked exhausted. And yet, there was still something so powerful about him…
You struggled to swallow the lump in your throat. Somehow, speaking to someone else made it all more real…
“I’m doing my best, sir,” you answered, your voice shaking.
“Are you hurt?” he asked, narrowing his eyes to look more closely at your shape sitting in the snow.
“It’s only a flesh wound. I’m okay.”
You saw him clenching his jaw and fists. Always a bad sign. But his gaze was still stern and calm when it met yours again.
You couldn’t say that you knew him well, but then, you reckoned that no one truly did. He kept people at bay, it was safer that way.
Still, you thought that you knew him enough to recognize the anger in his set jaw, the frustration in his tight fists…
You were surprised, though, when he kneeled in the snow by your side.
“You are no Healer,” he said, it was more of a statement than a question, as if he was reminding you.
“No, I’m a Heartrender, sir. I’m trying my best, but the wound is very deep.”
You felt a little stupid for reminding him of your Corporalnik status. He knew who you were. Better than anyone, in a way. There had been long nights in his War Room spent talking about your childhood, about his longing for a safe haven for Grisha, about dreams unreachable even through the dark…
But then again, nothing more than that. Just talking, for long hours. And he hadn’t shown you any sign that anything more would happen, and neither had you. To you, it was ridiculous to think so, anyway. He was the Darkling, after all.
You didn’t know he enjoyed these moments as much as you did though; that despite his better judgement, he longed for them.
How could you know? He was good at keeping a mask on. He had had centuries to master this talent to perfection.
“Allow me,” he spoke, voice soft, barely audible above the howling of the wind in the branches and the cracking frost of snow. Still, it was delicate, velvety almost…
You nodded, although you weren’t sure what you were agreeing to. He was the Darkling, after all. You trusted him blindly.
You started when he gently pulled on your dirty red sleeve, pushing it up your forearm to reveal your wrist.
“Keep working,” he instructed, and you obeyed.
He found your pulse easily, without looking for it at all, as if it called for his fingertips. He simply rested the pads of his fingers against your wrist, and they naturally landed on the pulsing blood. As if his fingers were meant to rest there…
You felt a surge of power cursing your entire body; and if you were still shaking, this time it was because of power instead of fatigue.
You stared at him, gaze intense and unwavering, for several seconds, and he held your gaze too. There were no feelings to be read in the two inky orbs that stared back at your soul, but you couldn’t escape from them anyway.
You had heard many rumours about the Darkling’s amplifying abilities, you guessed they were all true.
“Will you be able to save him now?” he asked, voice calm and emotionless, asking a mere question, as if there wasn’t a life depending on it.
You nodded and focused on Andrei without another word, the Darkling following the movements of your hands to keep the contact between your skins. Your heart was beating faster than ever, and you weren’t certain if it came from the sudden surge of power running through you now, or by the Darkling’s nearness…
It took you a while before Andrei was stable enough for him to be transported safely in the morning. Or maybe you would start moving again before dawn, you weren’t sure, you didn’t even know where you were going…
You lowered your hands at long last, feeling exhaustion rush over you once more despite the Darkling’s amplification, but you were surprised when he didn’t let go. You expected the lack of contact to happen as soon as you would be done, for his fingers to run away, to flee your skin and leave in their trail only a cold gush of wind. Instead, his fingers remained there, pressed to your pulse, and when you looked up at him, he looked like he was the one holding an amplifier in his hand, instead of the other way around.
You got caught in his eyes again, trapped in two dark orbs that captured everyone who dared to look at them, and you knew it. He had something dangerous, magnetic about him. You had seen him at court enough to know that he played with his charisma to manipulate people to do his bidding as much as possible. But what could he manipulate you to do now? You had almost died today. You had killed under his command, you had watched your friends die, you had run away wrapped in his protective shadows…
What else could he get from you? There was nothing more to extract anyway. Maybe that was why you didn’t doubt his sincerity when he spoke again.
“Please, follow me, Y/N. I need your help.”
You didn’t question where you were heading, how you could help. Instead, you stood up despite your exhaustion, and followed him through the trees. You didn’t walk far, it was too dangerous to venture away from the group, but he guided you where you wouldn’t be disturbed, where you couldn’t be seen by the remnants of the Second Army.
And his fingers were still there, burning against the skin of your wrist… unwavering, unfaltering, eternal…
When he stopped, turned towards you again, the Darkling was shaking slightly. You wondered if it was because of you, because of how he had helped you. After all, he was a living amplifier. Did he tire out if he helped someone else use their powers?
He gave you a smile that you found shier than his usual ones. You were used to see them filled with nothing but confidence, or threat sometimes. Now, the gesture was almost tender.
“I know you are tired,” he breathed, eyes capturing your gaze once more. “But my shoulder is very painful.”
“I can help,” you assured him, moving your hands into position, and his smile widened.
“Always so brave…” he muttered, but there was fondness in his deep voice. “Still, we should sit, for your leg.”
You nodded, and the two of you sat down side by side, not caring about the cold of the snow under you. He had a pretty nasty cut running across his shoulder, but it wasn’t very deep. It was much easier to heal than Andrei’s wounds.
“If you are too tired, it can wait till morning,” he offered, but you shook your head, and gave him a reassuring smile.
“If you help me, I can heal you now.”
He nodded, a silent order for you to get to work. Or rather… it looked perhaps more like a question, like he asked for a favour. You were happy to comply either way.
He felt better now, his shoulder almost completely healed in a matter of minutes, the throbbing pain fading away a little more with each movement of your fingers over his shoulder, despite the itchy sensation that came with the mending of his flesh. And the reassuring warmth of your skin against his…
Earlier that day, he looked for you through the battlefield. He shouldn’t have. You were but a passing thing, like one of his shadows. You wouldn’t linger the way he would. Like his darkness, you would be gone with the first signs of dawn.
Still, at the most violent part of the battle, his eyes looked for you, without him noticing. Like they were meant to search for your frame through the chaos.
He shouldn’t have. You were but a passing thing, like one of his shadows…
“How is your leg?” he asked once the pain across his arm and back had almost vanished, knowing you were almost done.
“It’s just a flesh wound. It’s nothing. And to be honest, I’m too tired to think about it.”
“I’ll bandage it for you.”
He wasn’t asking for permission this time, he was stating a fact, almost giving an order. You nodded in a silent agreement.
You wondered how he did it. Once you were done, there was still a long, reddened line crossing his shoulder blade. It must have been extremely painful, and yet, he had remained stern for hours, not a single wince forming on his features throughout your crazy run through the battlefield, through the forest…
Was he so used to being hurt after so many battles that he had mastered hiding his pain to perfection?
You could never have guessed how true that was…
“I’m done,” you spoke at last. “It might remain painful for a few days, I’m sorry.”
But he smiled at you, his head tilted a little to the side, something amused on his features now.
“There is no need to be sorry, you’ve done a good job.”
He moved his shoulder a little, as if to prove a point.
His fingers didn’t move away from your pulse though… burning…. Burning through your skin…
“Do you need anything else, sir?” you asked, thinking that was the reason behind his lingering touch.
It wasn’t. It simply… it simply felt good. To touch somebody, no matter how innocent that touch might be. Skin against skin. Feeling your pulse, the rhythm of your heartbeat, directly under his fingertips…
It was a luxury to him. Had always been. When you were to be a prey, you needed to choose the moments to reveal your weaknesses carefully, or you would be devoured.
He was more of a predator himself now. He had grown into one, had taken a hold of these shadows that scared him as a child, had become ruthless with time. For the most part, at least.
Still, he craved for it. The simple contact of another human’s skin against his, even if it were to last for a mere moment, for just a second…
And you had been allowing him to touch you for what felt like hours now. He could barely breathe at the thought.
He trusted you enough to let you feel it. The power that ran through his bones. The curse that made him undying. That made him linger even after all was gone. That made him run away again, and again, without any place to fall down to…
He let you feel it, running through your veins, and he trusted you enough to believe that you would not crave for more after he would pull away. He hoped that if you touched him again, it would be to touch him, not his power.
He moved his fingers to hold your wrist more firmly, and his thumb grazed the inside of your wrist, brushing your pulse, making your heart stumble. You were used to it now, to the power of the amplifier. You weren’t used to his touch, though. You weren’t sure you would ever be…
You weren’t certain why you started crying. Why now. You had not shed a tear during the battle, afterwards, as you fled, as you healed your friends, as you saw their dead bodies… You hadn’t cried at all despite everything that had happened. And yet… yet now you were letting a tear roll down your cheek, looking down at the snow to flee the Darkling’s gaze, to run from everything…
You shuddered, leaned into his touch, when he brushed your tear away from your cheek, touch gentle, delicate, barely there at all… almost like a dream… like a passing thing, one of his shadows…
“I’m sorry for today,” he whispered, and you looked up at the sound of his voice, frowning a little.
It was shaking, fragile. Deep still, laced with something that came from darkness but he looked so human now…
“None of this was your fault,” you replied, letting him brush another of your tears away.
“It was though. I was the one in charge. It was my fault.”
“It was the King’s fault. Even you have to obey sometimes.”
He clenched his jaw for a second, because you were right. Even he had to obey. Had to let Grisha die over nothing but a piece of land.
One day though, he wouldn’t have to. He would be the one to take decisions, and then the Grisha would be safe, at long last. It was an old promise he had made to himself, he intended to keep it…
But the worry quickly disappeared from his gaze, he relaxed again, the ghost of a smile tugging at his lips now.
“Only sometimes, though.”
You exchanged a smile, and you felt safer now. Safer than you had felt ever since you had left the protection of the Little Palace. But was it surprising? He was the reason why the Little Palace was safe to begin with…
You didn’t know why, but you were certain nothing would happen to you under his watch. Maybe it was a fool’s hope, some heavy denial after being so close to Death all day… you weren’t sure. But then again, no one could survive without hope…
And he should never have touched you like this. He shouldn’t have let you feel the power you could earn from him. He shouldn’t have let himself grow fond of you in the first place, because maybe now it was something a little more than that… He was too old, he had lived too many lives to fall into this kind of traps.
Or was he?
It was better not to tread on this. You were but a passing thing, like one of his shadows. You would disappear with the first signs of dawn, and he would linger on. The curse of this power running through his bones…
Slowly, he pulled his fingers away from your face, released your wrist, left your pulse, ran from the steady beat of it. And all that was left against his skin was a cold, howling gush of wind.
There was nothing he could hold onto anyway. He would outlast them all. He would outlast you, by a hundred years, maybe even more, maybe even a thousand.
He would remember those eyes though, he knew he would. And it would hurt to remember them, in the deepest darkness he summoned. Two eyes staring right into his souls. Two eyes he could have fallen for, in another life, one that could end with yours…
He saw your lower lip trembling a little as you looked up at him, the way your eyes dropped to look at your wrist, where his fingers had been. And then he was afraid of his own shadows all over again, the same he was as a child.
Were you rubbing that spot on your wrist because of his touch, or because of the power it had given you for a moment?
You didn’t look up at him as you reached for his arm, hand clinging to his torn, dirty, stained kefta. You were pretty sure you weren’t allowed to do this, to lean against him, to hold onto his arm, to rest your forehead against his shoulder. It didn’t matter. You missed the effect he had on you too much for that.
Calm. Safe. Beating heart pounding with life despite the sorrow.
He was grateful that you weren’t looking at him. He could let tears form in his dark eyes then, although he couldn’t let them run down his cheeks, couldn’t let them free. Appearing, that was already a lot…
You couldn’t feel his amplifying powers through his kefta. It required skin-on-skin contact. And yet, you were still there, pressing yourself against him, holding tight, as if to a lifeline.
When he wrapped his arm around your frame, pulling you closer, holding you tight, he was shaking a little. It was okay, he didn’t mind, and neither did you. It felt too good to mind.
Calm. Safe. Beating heart pounding with life despite the sorrow.
When he reached for your hand, when he pressed his lips to your head, he didn’t mind that you would feel what he was. The power hidden in his bones, that promised him an eternity, but only spent alone.
And you didn’t mind it either. You weren’t scared of it. You didn’t crave for it. It felt more like a burden than anything else.
You were right about that.
And he shouldn’t have done any of this, shouldn’t have let himself slip so far. He should have run, the way he always did, the way his mother had taught him to, the way he had learnt by himself. You were but a passing thing, like one of his shadows. You would be gone with the first signs of dawn…
Still, he remained, for once.
Just for the night, while the world still lingered in darkness, maybe he could have that. Maybe he could have you, for just a few hours, before letting you run away, like he always did.
Maybe, for just a few dark hours, it could be enough.
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