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pigeonp0st · 4 years ago

Note

could u do nat taking care of r when r gets sick (pretty please i beg of u)? preferably lots of cuddles 🥺🥺

idk i just love soft!nat 🥺

Natasha Romanoff x Reader #5

Words: 1,689

Warnings: none?

Notes:

I didn’t really like how this one turned out but i’ve finally decided that staring at it in my drafts with disappointed isn’t gonna make it any better...so here it is. Thank you for requesting, and sorry for spelling mistakes. Hope you enjoy!

———

It started with a cold. Just a couple of sneezes, a runny nose, and a sore throat...the usual.

It started out with you trying your best to hide it. Hide the sickness. That plan went under the moment Natasha heard you sneeze during training... she had you confessing to your sins much too quickly.

Suffice to say she immediately kicked you out of the training area with demands to take some medicine.

So she was the first to realize that you were sick, and she was the first to realize you were getting worse instead of better. She’d pester you endlessly when you wouldn’t want to talk about it, and watch over you like a hawk.

It was sweet, but you also didn’t think it was necessary. You were sure you’d be fine in three or so days.

How wrong you were.

When you wake up with a 103° fever for the third day in a row it has you layed in bed for the whole day groaning about the inequalities of the world, and begging Natasha not to get a doctor for the 100th time.

You were fine. Totally fine.

Natasha watches you with a mix of amusement and concern from the corner of the room and suggests, gently, that maybe you’re not.

You peak over your covers to glare at her in something like betrayal. “I’d be fine if you’d stop pacing and come cuddle with me.”

She seems to think about her options for a long moment and right when you think she’s going to reject you she relents with a heavy sigh and gets into the bed.

She’s so blissfully cold it has you snuggling into her side immediately, both to warm her up and use her as your own personal ice pack.

“You’re burning up,” Natasha whispers, but she pulls you closer to her—like somehow if she’s close enough she can absorb some of your pain and make you feel just that little bit better. “If your fever rises even a little bit we’re going to the doctors, okay?”

She’s concerned and worried, and even though a stranger fussing over you is the last thing you want you know you have to give her this.

As soon as you nod your head in agreement some of the tension seeps out of her body, much to your relief. As ridiculous as it is, you’re worried about her worried about you—if that makes sense.

“Around 100,000 people died from the flu in 2019,” Natasha mumbles against your forehead. She adds quietly after a moment, “just in case you were wondering.”

You were not wondering. What the fuck.

“Nat...that statistic is mostly old people.”

“Yeah,” Nat agrees, “you’ll be fine.”

And despite your body's protest, and how much of a pain it is to pull away, you do, just so you can give Natasha an incredulous look so she knows just what you think about what she’s doing right now.

Her face is unexpectedly vulnerable when you see it. She isn’t trying to bother you...she’s just…she’s worrying herself crazy.

“Nat,” you sigh, ready to embark on the most comforting and articulate speech you can think of, but a sudden fit of coughs has you turning away hurriedly to muffle your face in a pillow.

When your lungs finally decide to stay in your body for now, and Natasha stops rubbing your back, you’re too tired to try and comfort her, so instead you mumble, on the verge of sleep, “if I die; just know I love you.”

Which, in hindsight, probably doesn’t help much.

But she doesn’t sound worried when she replies, just exasperated and fond. “I love you, too.”

———-

When you wake up again it’s to a bunch of kisses and beautiful red hair.

“Stop attacking me,” you grumble, trying to push her away, but you're not able to hide your smile. God, you love your badass (soft) girlfriend.

“Look who's not dead!”

Remembering your last words to her before you went to sleep has you finally opening your eyes and giving Nat a sheepish smile. Oops. “Look who really wants to get sick…”

“My immune system is stronger than yours,” Natasha scoffs, shoving both your medicine at you and a bottle of water.

“Asshole,” you mumble, moving to open the medicine bottle only to get stopped by a hand on your wrist. “What?”

“You need to eat first.”

Thus, starts the trip towards death.

————

“Oh my god, how much farther is it…”

Your fever is finally down and back to safer levels so naturally Natasha has insisted that you’re able to go to the kitchens yourself and sit outside to eat.

You need fresh air, she said.

The room is getting stuffy, she said.

It’ll be good for you, she said.

What a fucking devil.

“You’re literally the most dramatic person to ever grace this earth,” Natasha tells you for only the millionth time since the journey began. “Maybe if you stopped sliding against the wall and crawling on the floor like you got shot three times we’d get there faster.”

“Maybe if you’d help me—”

“I tried! But apparently i’m ruining your image.” She rolls her eyes when she says that, then turns away to grin like she thinks you won’t notice.

You’re a whipped idiot who's decided to make a complete full of yourself and waste what little energy you have just to get your girlfriend to laugh, and to prove to her that you’re doing better.

You’re definitely going to regret this later, but now, in the moment; This is totally worth it. No doubt.

————

Wanda is in the kitchen.

As soon as you see her you straighten up and stop leaning on the wall (and limping). Natasha laughs next to you when she notices.

“You’re doing better, Y/N?” Wanda asks, glancing over you before returning back to the soup she’s making. For you. She’s making soup for you.

You adore her. She’s your favorite person, she’s—

“Not your girlfriend,” Wanda interjects, amused, “and doing this as a concerned teammate, and because your girlfriend asked.”

“Yes, well I love you anyways. Your cooking has gotten very good,” you say, shooting her a grin while you practically bounce to the dining chair, in stark contrast to the way you were dragging yourself down the halls.

Natasha does a good job at trying to not look confused, but she clearly is. Unfortunately, or fortunately, Wanda informs her before you get the chance to.

“Favorite person for making you soup?” Natasha asks once Wanda’s done relaying your thoughts. She narrows her eyes at you then. “Not the person who has been taking care of you since you became an avenger, not the person who—”

“It’s very good soup, Nat.”

“Very,” Steve agrees from the living room.

Natasha sighs, takes a sniff of the soup, and resigns herself to the facts she’s faced with. “Yeah...it is.”

——-

“Close your mouth,” Natasha orders, tapping your chin. You listen, waiting patiently for the beep of the thermometer to signal it’s done.

When it does, Natasha pulls it back to study it. There’s a small lapse of anxious silence before Natasha reveals the results. Then...“Ninety-Nine. You’re officially a healthy woman.”

And with that, you’re finally free of the bed rest and able to walk the halls as a newly restored human being.

“I’m free,” you shout, tackling Natasha onto the bed and kissing her all over her face, completely overjoyed. “Natasha, I survived!”

You survived. It only took an exhausting week. When your fever went down a couple of days ago it spiked to 105° a bit after and you were sure you were going to suffocate in Natasha’s worry because of it. You had to go to the medical room...it was awful.

But now Nat laughs, and laughs, and then pulls you into a tight hug to stop all of the kissing. She seems to be unburdened and lighter now that she finally has the numbers she’s wanted.

“Loving you as much as I do is really just living in this constant state of worry and fear,” Natasha says when you’ve both settled down. “I do not like things being out of my control,” she admits, kissing the crown of your head. “Especially when it involves my heart.”

“Your heart,” you repeat, curious. “Is that what I am?”

“Ignoring the worry and fear part?” Natasha teases, quirking an eyebrow.

“We both know those feelings are accompanied with a multitude of good and beautiful emotions. I feel them too.”

Natasha smiles then, soft and gentle, and full of admiration. “Yes.”

You tilt your head. “Yes...what?”

“Yes, you are my heart. Or at least you feel like you are.”

At that, with a determination and seriousness that visibly shocks Natasha you say, “i’ll protect it. I’ll protect myself, and because you're mine also, I'll help protect you. Always.”

“Always,” Natasha agrees, her fingertips trailing across your cheek. “Thank you, Y/N.”

“Yeah,” you mumble, embarrassed suddenly, “of course.”

————

“Are...are you serious?”

Natasha scowls into her tea and says nothing in response. This is fucking hilarious.

Your lovely girlfriend doesn’t seem to think so because the second she sees your face struggling not to laugh she begins glaring at you. “Don’t,” Nat warns. “Don’t you fucking dare—”

“I seem to recall you saying, and I quote, ‘my immune system is stronger than yours.’” You grin. “Oh how ironic this is.”

“I’m not sick—”

“Aw, but baby, the amount of tissues on the floor seem to be saying otherwise,” you gesture towards the growing pile, feeling absolutely no sympathy until Natasha glances at the pile with a sigh of defeat. She looks so small and sad covered in her pile of blankets...it simply won’t do. “Don’t fret, my love. I will take care of you, just as you took care of me,” you assure her, leaning down to kiss her forehead.

“First things first,” you tilt her chin up, “i’ll get Wanda to make you some soup so you can take some medicine.”

“I hate the world,” Natasha grumbles, mumbling some curses in russian.

“I love you, too.”

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luwupercal · 4 years ago

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eventually I'm gonna make u do all the Primarchs ehehehehehehehehe anyway do you have any Angron headcanons for the class 🥺👉👈

i have not answered this ask for 2 months because thinking about angron gives me brain aneurysms anyways

couldn’t speak for a month after killing oenomaus. like a straight-up month. his throat was too fucked

still considers his time with the eaters of cities the best time of his life, despite how hard it was. he’s even like... somewhat irrationally upset at himself for having dared to suffer during that time, because of like, how much his grudge against his fellows’ final fate has led him to like, i guess idealize would be the word those days

“He was given a surprisingly free hand for a newly invested Primarch, for he was not required to undergo a period in which he shadowed one of his Primarch brothers while he grew into command, or even spend time in his new-found gene-father's company.” so we all agree the emperor definitely thought of him as a broken toy because he was an eugenics peddler and thus paid as little attention to him as possible right

(bonus: do you think angron would’ve been damnatio’d if he hadn’t been good at conquering? do you think the emperor pridefully considered it a second chance?) (or do you think it was because of the emperor seeing him with the eaters of cities? do you think the emperor saw himself in angron, unifying terra? do you think he thought angron would logically consider the eaters of cities as disposable as he did the thunder warriors?) (angron should get to kill the emperor tbh)

re: leman being sent to threaten angron to go to terra and get those butchers’ nails out of his men: not to go ham abt my MP thoughts but this really does take on an additional layer w/ the whole “this isn’t the first time legions have fought each other” thing. not to be the person who cares a lot about the primarchs caring about this specific topic but [elaborate goose honk orchestra]. the night of the wolf thing could also be a very blatant excuse coverup for that and that opens up a whole another can of worms on another possible view of how the mp situation is from the inside. idk i think this is an interesting topic

unsure if this is just me going a step further or if this is actually possibly articulated in canon (as i am w a lot of things) but i think it’d be interesting if the nails’ damage to his brain was actively worsened by his rapid healing. like it permitted them to be more entrenched and dig further? something like that

honestly i’d be really interested in hearing about his relationship with the nails because i’m not clear on whether he hates them or not. it’s, i mean, it’s definitely more complicated than that but also i wanna know what’s going on there clearly and i’m fairly sure the novels have done at least partial legwork (my guess based on gw-quality writing: he hated them but thinks it makes him strong now for no reason?? maybe it could be tied to his like, idealization of his days w the eaters of cities, but i’m not sure how given they didn’t have the nails)

REALLY fucking hates surgery now thank you. at some point definitely made a habit of staying awake as long as he could because of how many times he’d gone under for nails-related shit. i have no basis for this but look at me in the eyes trust me

actually hold on i’m constructing a scenario. the emperor’s knocked out angron at least twice for brain surgery related reasons. oftentimes, you can’t be too unconscious for brain surgery, or can’t be unconscious at all, because of the risk of damaging your brain without knowing because you aren’t awake to... y’know... use your brain. do you think it’s a stretch to wonder if angron has overheard, or straight-up plainly heard, of the emperor’s opinion of him as fundamentally broken due to the nails? because that could easily cause him to be proud, in a strange way, of those nails -- the man he holds a grudge against thinks they’ve broken him, what does he know?, he’s lived with them for most of his life. hah. what are you, world eaters? imperial lapdogs? pussies? you wouldn’t know suffering if it stared you in the face. something something high riders. when angron ordered all his sons to be implanted, he imagined the emperor’s face when he heard the news, that fury of suddenly having thousands of disposable tools utterly broken, and angron thought his annoyance and fury good. why isn’t GW paying me

it’s tattoos. i love the idea of angron wearing makeup but it’s way more brutal if he was forcibly tattooed with clown facepaint as a child as a way to denote him as an “entertainer” albeit an extremely bloody one. i don’t care if this is contradicted by canon. alternatively he became the joker

top 10 primarchs who would be communists if they hadnt discovered social darwinism instead

his relationship with lorgar is. complicated. “it’s blatantly obvious he pities me. frankly i pity him if anything” vs “of course i don’t pity him i just see him as utterly broken! also i don’t care if he hates me or not because i’m doing this for his own good because I Care about My Brother.” i don’t think lorgar has a very accurate picture of who angron is as a person, and vice versa because i don’t think angron is very willing to be sympathetic to lorgar, so lorgar can’t see what angron is really like and angron doesn’t want to see what lorgar is really like, and so it’s complicated like that. it’s fixable but they both would have to want to fix it and frankly it’s... yeaaah

this isn’t a headcanon but i’ve been thinking for a little too long about writing a fic where him and konrad are both successfully taken to terra (angron for literally everything, konrad specifically for blowing up nostramo) and bond there over hating the emperor and everyone disliking them. angron has a huge blow out moment and konrad swings by his room through the air tube thingies and brings him a bowl of warm authentic nostraman Nutrient Gruel (may include rat), his favourite comfort food, and angron is insulted at first until he realizes konrad means it as a conciliatory measure. they argue a lot also because their specific brands of overly violent antisocialness are different but now konrad has the impulse to defend angron whenever his other brothers badmouth him in his earsight and vice versa. weird kid solidarity. Lorgar eventually has weird kid solidarity with them too and actual sincere solidarity and not what i talked about above. theyre friends

ok my wifi died so i’m gonna stop here but. yeah

#headcanons #ask #ii-and-the-sun

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normal-thoughts-official · 3 years ago

Text

Conversations You Can Have While Your Partner Ties You Up

Tom and Andy try shibari without supervision for the first time, and Andy is nervous.

Tom uses his best soothing technique: running his mouth.

Fandom: It Lives (Visual Novels)

Relationship: Andy Kang/Tom Sato

Additional Tags: Humor, Crack, Fluff and Crack, not smut!, not that there's anything wrong with that i just want to be clear, so no one's disappointed lmao, it's just the two of them bantering while andy ties him up, Tom Sato Has Strong Feelings About Yogi, Established Relationship, BDSM, Good BDSM Etiquette, because apparently bad bdsm etiquette is a tag and fuck that noise, dom andy kang, sub tom sato, altho again we don't really get into that but idk best to tag, way too many puns, they are very in love and it's disgusting, i am on my bullshit again, Almost No Beta We Die Like Uhh Bigender People

Read it on Ao3

It's the first time they're trying out shibari without an instructor supervising, and Andy is nervous. Tom can tell that Andy is nervous because his eyes keep darting to the safety shears way too frequently, and also because he whispered "God, I'm nervous" to himself several times while he was setting the gear.

Tom prides himself greatly in his Andy-reading skills.

Andy barely breathed while he was setting up the sleeve, making sure every single strand of rope was several inches away from the smallest articulation, checking and rechecking that he could put two fingers under the rope, and asking whether or not it was too tight every five seconds. All while holding his breath. Tom was scared he'd pass out from oxygen deprivation or something.

Getting to the harness part was a little better. For about ten seconds. The knots there are mostly decorative, but wouldn't you know, turns out Andy's perfectionist streak decided to kick in right then.

He's redoing the same knot for the third time when he starts to mumble. "Ancient Japanese art of being a pain in my ass..."

Ah yes, Tom thought to himself, grinning. A prime opportunity. "I thought it was you who was supposed to be the pain in my ass," he says.

Andy groans.

"Oh, come on, it was right there!"

"I realized my mistake as soon as it left my mouth"

"Me when you suddenly stop fucking my face."

Andy snickers, and Tom considers it a win. "Shut up," he says.

"Yes, dud- Sir."

"Were you about to make a BDSM joke and call me dude?"

"No. Yes. Maybe. Shut up!" Tom laughs, "In my defense, the horny and clown signals have been getting a little mixed up the last, like, five seconds."

"Why did that make me imagine you in a sexy clown outfit?"

"I'm just gonna go ahead and veto that idea right now."

"What, you don't want to explore clown kink?" Andy puts on his best Dom voice, "Honk for me, slut." He starts giggling.

"Andy, I swear to god, my dick's gonna go soft."

"Don't you dare!" Andy yelps, "I've been training for months to be able to tie you up like this and I will fuck you in Shibari, god damn it!"

"Yeah, no, nevermind, you're really hot when you're determined."

Andy smiles, "Oh, stop. Is that too tight?"

Tom tries to give him a thumbs up, then remembers that he can't and shakes his head instead. "No, it's good."

Andy nods in acknowledgement, then grins at Tom again. "Cool, so… Back to sexy clowns?"

"No clowns are sexy. They're terrifying."

"You willingly went into a haunted town."

"Yeah, and you know how many clowns there were there? Zero."

"So that's the criteria for our sexy costumes? Is, like, sexy zombie bear still on the table then?"

"I'm gonna ask you to take a moment to consider the words that are coming out of your mouth."

"I've never done that in my life and I'm not going to start now." Andy says, casually, then frowns. "Can you help me with this one?"

"Heh," Tom smiles, "sorry dude, my hands are tied."

Andy groans. "Will you stop making puns, you ass?"

"Heh, ass-"

Andy ignores him. "I meant, lift your hip a little bit."

"Aye aye, captain."

"This is virtually the same as 'yes, Sir', yet so different."

"Ooh, do I smell pirate roleplay?"

"You know what? We could get those old hats we used when we were kids-"

"Do you know where to get a sword? I very much want swords."

"Ooh, knife play but long."

"I need to make a swordplay pun right now."

Andy gives a little laugh. "Do you?"

"I'm just not inspired enough. Guess I gotta get better with my wordplay..."

This time, Andy full-on laughs. He needs to stop focusing on his knots for a second. Tom's grin is way too proud.

Andy bites his lip. "Come on, this is gonna take forever at this rate. Help me out for a sec."

"Sorry, my hands are-"

"Okay, if you make that pun one more time, I'm not letting you cum at all tonight."

"You promise?"

"Ugh. Punishing you is so hard. Let me rephrase that. If you make that pun one more time, I am letting you come tonight, just once, and then calling it a day, like this is vanilla sex or something."

Tom gasps. "Evil."

"Or maybe I'll make you say that Yogi is not that bad."

"You'll never take me alive."

Andy gestures to Tom's immobilized body, smiling. "Pretty sure I already have you."

"Oh no, I had the instinct to say something incredibly sappy and disgusting."

"Were you going to answer 'always'?"

"I will neither confirm nor deny."

"Well, that's a shame. 'Cause if that had been the case, I'd have said, 'same'."

Tom pretends to swoon as best as he can, considering he's almost completely immobilized. It mostly consists of tilting his head. "And they say romance is dead."

"You gave me finger guns when I first said 'I love you'."

"And you think I should be the standard?"

"Well, who else is it gonna be? Me? When you first said 'I love you', I said 'sweet'."

Tom smiles, softly. "It was pretty sweet, if you ask me."

Andy bites the inside of his cheek. "Shut up. I'm almost done, by the way."

"Nice."

"Not thanks to you."

"Okay, look, I know I'm not supposed to say that my hands are tied anymore, but in this case it's just, like, literally true."

"Doesn't mean you have to keep distracting me."

"Ooh, I'm distracting?" Tom wiggles his eyebrows, lifting his hips up a bit.

Andy laughs. "You know that, in this case, you're getting in the way of us having sex, right?"

"I don't know, man. I'm tied up, my dick is hard, you're touching me, you're smiling, that's a win in my book."

"You're only partially tied up, which is exactly my point."

Tom makes his best impression of Akon in I Just Had Sex, "Still counts!"

Andy snorts, but tries to compose himself. "So, what, once I'm done with this I can just leave you tied up and call it a day?"

"I mean, that'd be hot, yeah."

"Ugh, you're impossible."

"You love me."

"Don't change the subject."

Tom grins. "So you admit that you love me."

"I'm your boyfriend of three years."

"Don't change the subject."

It's Andy's turn to grin. "Of course I love you, you dork. Now shut up so I can finish tying you up."

"Aww, I love you too."

"Thanks, man."

"I'm sorry, did you just say 'thanks, man'?"

"Well, my hands are busy, so I can't finger gun."

"Will you let it go?"

"Very funny thing to say while I'm tying knots around your dick."

"Ah, you're right. In that case, tie me up harder."

"How am I supposed to tie you up harder?"

"I don't know, I just think it sounds sexier when you add a 'harder' at the end."

"Like, 'honk harder, clown'?"

"Now you're just trying to upset me."

Andy smiles at him, slyly. "Maybe I think you need a little punishment."

Tom grins in a way that makes Andy regret everything he's ever said. "Aww yeah, baby, I better start singing La La La, 'cuz I've been a Naughty Boy."

Andy can't help it. He bursts out laughing. "You dork!" He wheezes, face falling on top of Tom's shoulder as he laughs. Tom grins.

"See, that's the Andy I know and love, laughing at every stupid shit I say."

Andy giggles for a few more seconds, holding onto Tom's shoulders, before shaking his head to try and focus. He still lets out a little laugh every once in a while, though. "I swear, it's like you don't want me to fuck you in shibari," he grumbles.

Tom looks appalled. "This is slander."

"Then, like, get into ropespace and stop talking or something."

"I can't get into ropespace when I know you aren't, either," Tom grumbles.

Andy freezes. "What?"

Tom bites the inside of his lip, turning in the other direction. "You were nervous," he says. Then he nods in the direction of Andy's hands, "you've been a lot calmer since we started talking. You're almost done."

Andy looks down, actually realizing that Tom's torso is almost entirely decorated with knots at this point. "Oh. You're right."

Tom grins again. "So, see, by distracting you with my dumb shit, I actually helped us finish this quicker. And they say running your mouth isn't a talent."

Andy smiles. Lets the rope go. Throws his arms around Tom's neck and gives him a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you, love," he says, peppering kisses in his face. Tom laughs.

"You're welcome. Now finish tying me up so we can get this show on the road," he says, way too innocently. Andy grins, and pulls his hair.

"You're in no position to make demands, slut."

Tom's eyes flutter in bliss. He smiles again. "Yes, Sir."

#it lives #it lives in the woods #ilitw #tom sato #andy kang #tom x andy #andy x tom #tomdy #literally when will i stop #crack

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jisvnq · 4 years ago

Text

[ 20:25PM ]

title | interruptions

genre | fluff, humor, best friends to lovers but it's what happens after the confession

warnings | none; probably just bad spontaneous writing shdh

word count | 1.5k

requested | by anonymous

description | where jisung knows the moments after his best friend confesses to him that she likes him back aren't supposed to be this awkward, and that just maybe, the third time's the charm ♡

z.txt | idk if i'm happy with this or not lol like it's just a 2am coffee-induced brainfart at it's best have fun reading more brainfarts (the text for the header kinda crapped up but alr sjdhs) watch me post this and dip JSJKSDJ

Jisung let out a deep breath, sneaking a glance at the side of your face as you nervously fiddled with the hem your shirt. He knew you felt the same way as he did, but why was he still so nervous?

"So, uh..." Jisung cleared his throat, breaking the thick silence that fell upon the room. He scooted just a bit closer to you, but you did the same, resulting in your knee bumping his lightly. "Wh- what now?"

Years of watching idiotically romantic movies and binge-watching impossibly unrealistic dramas with you left him with some sort of experience when it came to this love thing, and he just knew that the moments after confessing your love for each other were not supposed to be this awkward.

A thousand thoughts ran through his head. Maybe he did something wrong? Or maybe he said something wrong? What if now wasn't the right time for him to confess? But you had told him you liked him back, so why weren't you doing any—

"W- we could kiss?" you suggested quietly, cheeks warming up at your own suggestion.

"We could wh- what now?" Jisung repeated, feeling as if his ears have fooled him. Did you actually want to kiss him?

"K- kiss," you muttered, looking away from him. "But n- nevermind. I completely understand if you don't want to—"

"But I want to." The words come out of his mouth quicker than his brain could process them, his face slowly growing hot once again.

He clamped his mouth shut when he heard your small giggle, his heart beating at a pace quicker than he had ever thought was humanly possible. Maybe he should take Hyuck's advice and really do think before he speaks...

Your face slowly neared his and he sucked in a breath when he felt yours fan his face. He closed his eyes when your nose touched his and he felt just about ready to faint when your lips lightly brushed against each other—

Then you pulled away. What?

Did he somehow do something wrong this time? No, he doesn't think he did. You initiated it... whatever that was.

Did his breath smell like shit? No, he almost choked on his mouthwash earlier when he heard you knock on his door.

Did he smell like shit? He didn't think so, at least. He took a shower and changed into your favorite hoodie of his as soon as you told him you were coming over. Maybe he should've asked Jaemin to wash the hoodie though...

"Y/n?" he asked concernedly, opening his eyes to see you place a hand over your face. Did he really smell that bad? "Is there anything wrong?"

"I- I just feel like—" you cut yourself off with a sneeze and Jisung jumped a bit. You giggled. "Sneezing. Sorry."

"You scared me," Jisung huffed, heaving out a relieved sigh. "I thought I smelled bad or something there."

"I never said you didn't," you said, biting back a giggle when he makes a face at you. "Kidding! Kidding. You smell like you always do. Like... you."

"And that's a good thing, I hope?" he asked, scrunching his nose at you, finally getting a giggle out of you.

You nodded, scooting closer to him on the couch and giving him a small smile, face right in front of his once again. "Yes. That's a very, very good thing."

"Good," Jisung said, eyes flickering down to your lips. He inhaled and looked back up at your eyes. "So... uh... no more sneezing?"

You shook your head with a chuckle, leaning in even closer to him. "No more sneezing."

He mirrored your smile, closing the gap between you slowly despite his brain screaming at him to hurry up. With you, Jisung had all the time in the world. Besides, it was your first kiss together and it just had to be perfect, right?

Well, not necessarily.

"Well, fucking finally!" someone exclaimed as the door burst open, making you and Jisung fling yourselves to the opposite ends of the couch, cheeks flushing red at the sudden interruption.

"Chenle, you idiot," Renjun sighed as he pushed the younger boy into the hallway.

"Oh, whoops," Chenle grinned sheepishly, catching Jisung's glare. "Sorry."

"Don't mind us~" Jaemin hummed, pushing Haechan and Jeno into the hallway with Chenle and Renjun before any of them could interrupt any more. "We'll be in our rooms if you need us."

An awkward silence once again fell over the room as soon as all the doors closed, both of you refusing to look at each other in the eyes.

Jisung let out a little huff of annoyance and embarrassment. Why hasn't anything gone his way today?

The articulate and carefully worded confession he had prepared for you at least months before today, somehow vanishing as soon as he opened his mouth.

The comfortable atmosphere he had tried his absolute best to set up, disappearing into thin air after you had clumsily voiced out your own feelings for him.

And the perfect first kiss he had originally wanted to give you, left as a passed opportunity as each of your two attempts ended up in unexpected and completely uncalled for interruptions.

He didn't even want to think of anything else that could possibly go wrong.

"Third time's the charm?" you had suggested hopefully, turning your head to look at him.

"A- are you sure you still want to, uh, you know..." Jisung mumbled, looking down at his feet. "Kiss me? Even after everything that's gone wrong?"

You took initiative and slid over to his side of the couch, giving him a soft smile that never failed to melt his heart every single time. "Jisung, I still wanted to kiss you even after you pretty much blew up the whole Chemistry lab in ninth grade."

You chuckled, taking one of his large hands in both of yours. "You smelled like dog piss, your hair was standing up stiff, and you had toxic powder and whatnot all over your face. I don't think anything can top that, and yes, I still want to kiss you, you idiot."

Jisung couldn't help but laugh at the memory, shaking his head when he remembers the disgusted look on your face as you dragged him to the nurse's office, cleaning him up when even the nurse herself didn't dare go near him.

"Even if I'm no good at kissing?" Jisung asked, looking up at you.

"Even if you're no good at kissing," you laughed. "And don't worry, I'm probably just as bad as you are at this stuff. We both aren't single for no reason."

"Maybe we can change that?" Jisung asked, mouth working quicker than his brain once again, his reddening ears making it more obvious. "No, I mean—"

"Actually, I'd like that," you giggled, a wide grin spreading across your face when you see his sheepish smile. "I'd very much like that. So... you're my boyfriend now?"

"I'm your boyfriend now?" Jisung echoed, feeling as if he was in a daze, smile getting way too big as his cheeks began to hurt. Did he just get upgraded from best friend to boyfriend? "That sounds very nice..."

"Yes, yes it does," you said with a chuckle, witnessing the boy's brain turn into complete mush in front of you. "Now... do I get to kiss my boyfriend yet?"

His heart fluttered when you brought your hand up to his jaw, turning his head so he fully faced you. "Maybe, if we don't get interrupted again."

"But if we do get interrupted again?" you hummed, lips against his once again, the awkwardness suddenly gone as you were both filled with giddy excitement from the recent relationship upgrade.

And as if the god of interruptions was listening in on your conversation, just as Jisung opened his mouth to respond, his best friend's timing was impeccable.

"Oops," Chenle snickered, entering the living room once again. "I forgot my airpods—"

And without letting the other boy finish, nor let you shy away from him again, Jisung took a hold of your chin to gently keep you in place as he finally pressed his lips to yours, his brain a few steps late as he let his actions get ahead of himself once more.

"Shit, sorry, Y/n," Jisung apologized with wide eyes and red cheeks, realization of what he's just done hitting him like a brick. "I just— mmf!"

But instead of letting him splutter out an excuse for his spontaneity, you roll your eyes, capturing his lips in another, proper kiss. Until a sneaky little idea popped into your head.

You pushed him further into the couch, making the other boy watching feign retching sounds in the background as the two of you patiently waited until he left, only parting for air when you hear his footsteps finally leave the room.

"You think that'll stop him from interrupting us again?" you asked, giving him a cheeky grin, laughing when you see the dazed smile left on the boy's face.

"I don't know what's kept me from kissing you all these years," Jisung breathed out with a laugh, heart causing ruckus in his ribcage. "But I don't think even Chenle coming in screaming and holding up a bazooka will be able to stop me from kissing you anymore."

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just-this-once--stay · 4 years ago

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Little fic about the least explored arm of the new Best Friends Squad! Written on my phone so idk how long it is. Catra & Bow, G

***

Catra gets to know people by pushing their buttons.

It’s what she’s always done, all she knows how to do. She can admit these days that it isn’t kind or healthy or smart, but she doesn’t know how to trust anyone without knowing how far she can push them, how much it will take before they push back.

She knows, with Adora. She knows where the lines are and what Adora will do if she crosses them, and she knows that no matter how badly she screws up, Adora won’t really hurt her. Adora is exciting in every other way, but her anger is predictable, and that makes her safe.

It’s easy to figure it out, with Glimmer. Glimmer is quick to anger but even quicker to forgive, and anyway, Glimmer has already seen Catra at her most vulnerable and didn’t take advantage of it, which means more than Catra knows how to articulate. Glimmer will yell at Catra over a prank or a rude comment one minute and be laughing with her the next. It’s easy being around her, too.

Bow is harder to gauge. He’s too calm, too accepting. He has moments of self-doubt, but he never externalizes them, which makes him different from everyone else Catra has ever met. The whole time they’re in space, and hiding out with the rebels, and defeating Horde Prime, Catra is tense around him. She can’t figure him out.

She watches him, sometimes, at Bright Moon. For someone so kind, so wrapped up in his relationships with others, Bow spends a surprising amount of time alone. Catra sneaks looks through windows of him sharpening arrows, tinkering with tech, testing new inventions in an open courtyard. Even Glimmer, who’s not particularly sensitive about privacy and personal space and also attached to Bow’s hip, doesn’t bother him when he’s out there.

So Catra, of course, does.

He doesn’t even sound annoyed when Catra starts peppering him with questions about what he’s doing. Even when she grabs an arrow right out of his quiver, all he does is snatch it back with a gentle warning that it might explode. He laughs with her when she deliberately interrupts his practice for the sake of “training.”

It’s unsettling.

Catra interrupts him in his room but all he does is hand her a stack of arrows and a whetstone when it becomes clear she doesn’t intend to leave. She almost stops after that - she doesn’t want to bother Bow, not really, but she can’t shake the feeling that the more he accommodates her tactlessness, her abrasiveness, her everything, the harder he’s eventually going to explode.

He finds her in her room one day, pushing open the door only after she tells him to come in. “Are you free this afternoon?” he asks, too respectful. He knows she doesn’t have any responsibilities here - no one trusts her enough. “I want to show you something.”

He takes her to a building, not far from Bright Moon but well-hidden in the woods, with similarly impractical architecture.

She finds herself following him inside unquestioningly.

“You must be Catra!” someone exclaims from the second level before Bow even has the chance to close the door behind them. Catra jumps, and Bow’s hand is suddenly in front of her, steadying without touching.

She pastes on a smile for George and Lance, who seem, against all odds, genuinely delighted to meet her. She’s nearing her limit on pleasantries when Bow makes an excuse and takes her to his childhood room, shutting the door behind them.

“So, that was my dads,” he says, his smile a little embarrassed but genuine.

Catra walks over to the window and crosses her arms. “Why am I here?” she asks. Bow’s trust and gentleness and patience itches at something under her skin. It keeps building and building and she doesn’t know how to handle it.

“A couple reasons,” Bow says, as if she’d asked something normal instead of invalidating his kindness like she’d been intending. “I wanted you to meet Lance and George, because you’re my friend and they love meeting my friends. I also could tell that you’ve been trying to get to know me, and I thought this might help.”

That’s an awfully generous way to frame what Catra has been doing. Logically, he shouldn’t even have put up with her for this long, but here he is, trying to accommodate her. “Why?” she asks. George and Lance are cool and all, but Catra doesn’t really get how they’re supposed to help her understand Bow.

Bow comes up next to her and looks out the window as well after Catra shies away from eye contact. “They’re my parents, and they’re really good parents. Growing up, the worst thing I could imagine was disappointing them.”

Catra just nods. She’s not learning anything. Nobody likes disappointing people, not really.

“Out of curiosity - what do you think I was afraid of, exactly?”

Catra actually has to think about that one. She can already tell that Lance and George have never even once threatened to murder Bow. “That they’d kick you out?”

Bow shakes his head. “Nah. They would never. I was afraid that they’d stop loving me.”

Catra’s arms tighten around herself. She’d never had any illusion that Shadow Weaver had loved her - Adora had, she always had, and Catra had lost that for a time, but that was different - she and Adora had chosen each other, over and over, even when Shadow Weaver had been trying to tear them apart. They weren’t supposed to love each other, not like families were.

“They didn’t do that either,” Bow says, gentle and smiling. “I know now that they wouldn’t have, no matter what. But a lot of the person I became started with that fear. I don’t know what it’s like to not have people in my corner I can fall back on, and I never want to.”

Catra’s tense, and somehow it’s on Bow’s behalf. He shouldn’t be sharing this with her, opening up his heart, exposing his vulnerabilities. That’s how people get hurt.

But at the same time, she knows that’s the point. He’s giving her what she wanted and needed and would never have dared to ask for - trust, so that she can trust him in return.

She could say something cutting now and see if he flinches. But she’s amazed to find that she doesn’t need to. She knows how to hurt him, because he’s told her. She trusts him.

“Thank you,” she says instead.

He bumps his elbow against hers, and her crossed arms loosen a little. “Anytime,” he says, his grin warm and full as ever.

#catra #bow #she ra #spop #spop s5

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searchforthescars · 4 years ago

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amanda, do you have any advice for someone who's just moved out for college? i moved out 2 weeks ago (i was supposed to move in the fall when school started but covid) & idk i feel so?? lonely? or sad, i guess? i'm a freshman & i was super excited leading up to it, but i got here & i'm in an apartment with 5 strangers & i'm overwhelmed with how many adulting things i need to do, like groceries & laundry & cooking. i always thought i was pretty independent at home & i've also been away for 1/?

summer programs or events for a week, 2 months, etc. so it's not like i've never been away from home before & don't know how to cook or do laundry or stuff like that. idk. i don't get why i feel like this & so overwhelmed (also, i think now i get why most freshman move into the dorms instead of going straight to an apartment haha). my roommates seem nice too, i just don't know them that well yet. i feel kind of silly & pathetic & baby-ish about this since i know i'm so lucky to be able 2/?

to move out, but mostly i just miss home & wanna go back to my parents & siblings & cats, especially since i don't have any friends here yet & can't meet any cause of covid. i'm 18 but i feel so much younger & it's kind of hard to believe that i'm 18?? like ahhhh i'm an adult??? when did that happen?? anyway, i'm sure it'll get better (or at least i'm telling myself it will), but idk what to do in the meantime. any advice?

Hey, kiddo!!

First of all, congrats on moving out -- I’m really proud of you for taking the next right step toward your future. You’re doing great <3

Second, don’t you dare think this is something you’re alone in experiencing; although it can feel incredibly isolating and terrifying, I promise that everyone has felt this way the first time they moved out of their parent’s/guardian’s home. I sure as hell did, and I was 20 with a college degree!!! There’s no shame in it, and I’m proud of you for being able to verbalize your struggles and reach out for help.

These are a few things that helped me when I was living on my own for the first time -- if I had known all this going in, rather than learning as I went, I would’ve had a much better time of it, so I hope these help <3 But if you have any questions or thoughts, my DMs are seriously always open to you, on- or off-anon. You deserve help and support and I’m honored to be trusted <3

Get yourself on a routine. Tbh, half of the reason why things feel daunting (at least in my experience) is that they feel nebulous. To combat that vis a vis household tasks like cooking, cleaning and laundry, I’d recommend setting up a weekly or monthly schedule. Look at your class schedule and any other commitments and figure out which weekday is best for you to do laundry, which nights you could meal-prep for the days ahead, and which weeks you’ll be cleaning your areas of the apartment. Jotting those down or putting some notifications in your phone calendar will help you a) remember to do those things and b) rest in the knowledge that you’ve given yourself some structure. If you feel you’ll struggle with actually doing those things, ask a roommate to be your accountability partner! They live with you, so they likely have a vested interest in you doing those things, and will certainly be happy to help out!

Give yourself something to look forward to. Missing your family is so hard, so plan when your next trip home will be. Plan a movie night or another activity with your roommates (in my opinion, PowerPoint Night is an absolute winner -- y’all can take turns presenting about literally any topic you want and it’s a great way to get to know people and what they’re passionate about (or passionately against).)

Get a tiiiiny bit social. It’s really hard with COVID, and I know it’s also anxiety-inducing to be The New Kid, but even something as simple as attending a Zoom event hosted by a campus organization can give you a little bit of social engagement -- if nothing else, you’re hearing voices outside of your own and your roommates’! There are also a lot of Discord servers out there for video game friends, students, fandom folks, pretty much anything; the platform offers a streaming function, which many people take advantage of and can be a great way to engage with other people around something you both love. Having that little bit of enrichment is really helpful and goes a long way in making you feel less isolated.

Do something with your hands. Find a tactile sort of hobby - drawing, painting, bullet journaling, digital art, collaging, etc. - and do it regularly. I bullet journal, make stickers, and collage the New York Times Sunday paper once a week. Doing something with your hands regularly is a good way to get your creative juices going and help the time go by, and it often is therapeutic as well.

Exercise regularly. I can’t tell you how helpful it is to get moving. It seriously is good for your mind and body, and you’ll feel motivated to do other things once you work out. I didn’t exercise for the first three months I lived alone and lemme tell you, when I started again, there was a marked difference in my mental health. Go for regular walks around the neighborhood, or if there’s space in your apartment to do some simple bodyweight workouts, the Nike Training app has great free guided workouts under 20 minutes. There are also workout videos free on YouTube, everything from strength training to cardio set to popular Tik Tok songs. I like to exercise about 30-45 minutes a day but YMMV

Treat yourself. I ran myself hard and ragged when I lived alone because I didn’t have anyone to encourage me to do otherwise. Even though you have roommates, it can still be easy to feel like you’re just ships passing in the night and that the accountability they provide extends to chores or other space-sharing ventures. So hold yourself accountable for doing one kind thing for yourself every day. Eat a piece of chocolate. Splurge on a coffee once a month. Buy a book you want to read. Do little things to treat yourself because you can, judgement-free! You’re your own boss now!

I hope these help a little bit!!! It can be really overwhelming and scary to be where you are but I promise, you are farther along than you think you are, simply because you can recognize and articulate these feelings and are reaching out for help. I’m proud of you and sending you all my love -- if you need anything, you got it. I’m here for you <3

#Anonymous

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kingsofneon · 4 years ago

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ayyy its me coming in here!!! i have no requests off the bat but uhhhh ok ok hear me out. acesabo but with like. a finger kink or something? like, long pretty fingers fingering the hell out of each other or just sensually sucking on it, idk, i'll let you decide. OR, more expansion on robinkoalasabo, blease?

look okay look im just. vibing with sabo/ace rn so i gotta talk abt them but real quick i love argumentative best friend/enemy / qpp koala/sabo and both of them liking robin, LMAO !!!!! bitch!!! that shit’s hilarious. robin i think would be uhh....unused to such honest attraction? yah sabo’s a lying liar but there’s a difference in his...sarcasm vs his “I’m telling a lie so you don’t know the truth I dont want to tell you”, is what i think. so idk in what i set up i guess we have ko/ro first and Kinda girlfriends (im.....ded for fro/bin tho soz so absoLUTE we have not-yet-together-kinda-feelings-but-complicated-bc-trauma robin/franky + bc theyre not together the...flattery + enjoyment of koala’s personality and company...) friends w/ benefits didn’t-really-date but like each other a lot. and koala so sunny and happy buuut also spending Lots of time with robin - just hanging out but also sexy fun times - and sabo’s like “no I’m not sulking shut the fuck up” (but he’s totally sulking because he Liked robin too, she was someone he respected highly and she! knows! luffy! he doesn’t say anything to her about it bc he’s guilty as fuck but. boii wants those strawhat stories and he can’t sneak them out of her with koala taking up all of her attention.)

koala picks up on his grumpy mood but just figures he’s being a dick abt smth, but robin’s like nah look, pattern, and koala’s like oh. OH?

idk what they do but w/e we be vibing with nsfw, which is sabo’s. sabo’s fucking fingers man. the tensile strength. BUT ALSO he’s not very delicate, not very good with flexibility, so robin,,ho fuck boi. when against koala the dichotomy of the roughness vs that clever stroking, but then also bRO im thinking about sabo viewing masturbation etc. pretty clinically and also Be Careful Of Strength, ain’t gotta lot of time to jerk off when you’re running the revolution u know.

so like the first time robin tops im fucking laughing. koala’s probably just as rough/efficient as he is but robin...robin can unlace him in like a minute flat and figures out real quick that sabo likes being edged. the first time robin touches his prostrate..........boi.

anyway omfg that was longer than i thought so hand kink + sabo/ace

FIRST

if you haven’t read.......second chances (https://archiveofourown.org/works/15495015?view_full_work=true).........what are you doing. look at this shit:

“You want to watch me jerk it like this?” The buckle rattled with Ace's gesturing, and Sabo's eyes immediately fixated darkly on the belt. “Then I uh, I get to make a weird request too.”

“If you must,” Sabo replied, sounding the exact opposite of beleaguered as he discretely wiped the spit off his palm. Ace cleared his throat.

“Put on your gloves.”

Ace refused, refused to look away from the devious delight spreading across Sabo's stupid face.

“Oh Ace,” he purred, those damn fucking gloves appearing in his hands out of nowhere (did he have them tucked in his pockets this entire time?). With deliberate motions, Sabo smoothed the leather over every finger, and flexed, like he was about to whip out one of his ryusoken moves. “Are you sure you just want me to jerk off in these?”

“Well if you've got any lube tucked away,” Ace shot back, “now's the time to pull it out, put on a good show.”

Sabo's consequent exhale was nowhere near the flippant-and-suave chuckle he had clearly been aiming for. Smugly, Ace counted a point in his own favor before dropping onto his back and finally—finally—undoing his pants. As his own belt fell with heavy thumps to both sides, Ace brushed aside all the pesky cloth, and applied pressure in earnest with a sigh of pleasure.

and this

And boy was it a view. The gloves were incredibly well-worn, molded so tightly to Sabo that Ace could see the full articulation of his fingers' every curve, every bend. The buttery leather, lighter in color at the fingertips, glided over Sabo with the barest whisper of friction. Ace could see his grip change, pressure shifting as he held himself tighter and tighter, grunting in frustration.

“Can I take these off?” Sabo finally requested with a hint of a whine. Ace suddenly thought of Marco, and how he might smirk at that tone, if he was here. “It's not working for me.”

“It's working fine for me,” Ace did his best to leer, thoroughly enjoying his own bare hand's capacity for friction. Sabo made another sound of protest, and Ace gave in with a snort. “Fine. Just one hand.”

“It's all I need.” The right glove disappeared as fast as it came, and Sabo arched high and satisfied into his own hand, now skin-to-skin. He obligingly let the gloved hand remain in play though, skimming teasingly up and down, grinning sharply at Ace's open mouth. “Hey,” he ordered, “go faster.”

AND THIS!

“Anything you want,” was Ace's breathless answer. He didn't stop, even sped up, gripping hard and fast and chasing that finale. “You can have it from me.”

“I would chain you down,” Sabo snarled, practically a threat, only the blade was turned wholly inward toward himself. Like he was daring Ace to give him absolution. “I would bend you 'til you're ready to break, and keep you there for hours. I would make you beg for release, but deny you anyways. I would see your skin dark with my bruises, I would, I would—”

Ace's hands twisted hard against his binds, wanting genuinely to be free of them for the first time since they started this—and Sabo's reaction was instantaneous. A flex of haki into his fingers, and Sabo was slicing through the leather of his belt, letting Ace loose with an expression of terror.

And Ace dragged himself across the bed until he could cup Sabo's cheek in his clean palm and pull Sabo into a biting, filthy kiss. He was still hard as sin, and thrust forward into Sabo's hands to let him know—

“Anything,” he panted into Sabo's mouth, meaning it with every fiber of his being. He didn't mean for Sabo to cut open the belt; he had just wanted, so badly, to feel Sabo's touch. “You have me.”

bitch. bitch.

idk just gonna write some prompts bc this looks long

sabo + jerking ace off while wearing his gloves + barely washing them (to ace’s embarrassment) bc he claims he likes having evidence of ace. they’re usually kept for when he’s at home tho, sabo’s gross but not that gross ;p (and ace would probably die LMAO)

SORRY BUT THE POST I JUST REBLOGGED ABT HOLDING YOUR THUMB DOWN TO HAVE NO GAG REFLEX UM. Ace says he wants to try it but it feels weird so sabo’s like. ;) okay and runs his fingers over ace’s mouth, tapping and instructing him to hold his thumb down. tracing his teeth and teasingly not dipping his fingers down low enough, till ace glares at tries to argue smth like “this is not testing the trick” but that’s when sabo presses on his tongue, down his throat, and ace half-chokes on it. sabo just like ‘not like you have much of a gag reflex anyway’

was thinking abt this the other day but ace doing sabo’s nails and then being like dont ruin them! no touching until they’re dry but sabo’s like but idk when they’ll be dry???? bc he’s never used nail polish before and ace is like :) better not touch then as he teases sabo

ace ofc painted them gold and red bc theyre His Colours and the next day when they’re dry and pretty sabo spends ages running his hands against ace’s skin, fascinated and worshipping of how pretty ace is

before they started dating and when they were bad at handling alcohol, sabo kissing ace’s knuckles made that boi CATATONIC, his wrist would also make ace bolt bc Horny, he’s fucked when sabo kisses his wrist it’s just too...intimate.

headcanons, headcanons, they’re both pretty calloused in different ways...ace is like rope burns and shit, longer across his palm and knuckles, sabo has palm base bc of his pipe, but they’re confined, and then on his fingertips bc of dragon claw. AGAIN thinking about mr fast fuck brutality here like the STRENGTH in that boy’s hands wtf

ace’s hands have more scars, sabo has more callouses/micro-deposits bc he knows hand to hand/doesn’t start with a DF.

idk where im going with that last one guess it’s just headcanons abt hands.

that’s all fox, i like the number eight and i have so many other asks to do lmao

#dirtyshankings #saboace #saborobinkoala #saroko #bleh what a gross acronym #lemons #not sfw #i need to figure out a n/sfw tag that ppl can block that tumblr wont k-word me for #opnsfw #answered asks

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volantisand · 4 years ago

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this just in - MARIANA “ MARI ” REYES has been in wickway for ( MORE THAN, BY NOW ) A MONTH. apparently SHE is a DANCER AT DRIFTWOOD and a CIVILIAN or so HER passport says. so far it’s known that SHE favors JOE AND GO, and resides at WEST PORT. SHE is also said to be LOYAL & CLEVER, but also CALCULATING & GUARDED. at the end of the day, SHE can be described as RED STAINED LIPS, DELICATE HANDS WIPING BLOOD OFF OF DAGGERS AND MISCHIEVOUS SMIRKS FOLLOWING UNDERESTIMATION.

hello again, loves !!! i bring you all the devil reincarnated herself, my baby mariana <33 her pinterest can be found anywhere here !! but it’s kinda messy

𝐁𝐀𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐒 ▸

FULL NAME: MARIANA MERCEDES REYES

NICKNAME(S): MARI

NAME MEANING / PRONUNCIATION: MARIANA MEANING OF THE SEA OR BITTER. MERCEDES MEANING MERCIES. REYES MEANING KINGS. ( MA-REE-AH-NAH MER-SEH-DEHS RAY-YES )

AGE: TWENTY FIVE

DATE OF BIRTH: APRIL 18TH

RANK / TITLE: CIVILIAN, EX-LEADER OF OUTSIDE GANG FROM HER HOMETOWN

OCCUPATION: DANCER AT DRIFTWOOD

HAIR COLOR: DARK BROWN NEARLY BLACK

EYE COLOR: HAZEL

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐎𝐑 ▸

POSITIVE: ATTENTIVE, ARTICULATE, CLEVER, CULTURED, DETERMINED, DRIVEN, INSIGHTFUL, LOYAL, PASSIONATE, PERCEPTIVE, PERFECTIONISTIC, PERSONABLE, SCRUPULOUS, WHIMSICAL

NEGATIVE: BLUNT, DISTRUSTING, HOT HEADED, SOMETIMES IMPULSIVE, GUARDED, METICULOUS, SARCASTIC, STOIC, STUBBORN

𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐘 ▸

FATHER: VICTOR REYES ( alive )

MOTHER: LUCIA REYES CASTILLO ( alive )

SIBLINGS: TWO OLDER BROTHERS, AN OLDER SISTER AND A YOUNGER SISTER

CHILDREN: NONE

𝐀𝐅𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 ▸

GANG(S): ANARCHY OF ROSEWICK ( formerly, it remains active ), CURRENTLY NOT AFFILIATED.

MARK: TATTOOED BIRD ON HER RIB CAGE, IT’S ACTUALLY SMALL BUT PIC ANYWHERE HERE and a few smaller little birds, much less detailed, surrounding it

POSITION / RANK: LEADER ( formerly )

WEAPON OF CHOICE: DAGGERS RARELY HAS A GUN.

YEARS AFFILIATED: EIGHT YEARS

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒 / 𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐒 ▸

born and raised in a fictional town called rosewick, she’s one of my past muses that has been adapted to come into wickway <33

she was named after her paternal grandmother. and had a very good relationship with both of her parents. growing up, she was always very in touch with her hispanic culture, adoring everything about her roots and then some. she began dancing before she could even walk properly and fell in love with it instantly.

she’s also not very tall bc frankly, i’m not either so my muses suffer with me, 5′2 at best.. however, she wears heels nearly twenty four seven. unless, y’know at home, at the beach or... idk working out.

having been born on the 18th of april, she is an aries.

“ Fun, free-spirited, and fiercely independent, the Aries woman is a breath of fresh air – a brightly burning candle in human form. Fire is her element, igniting all that she touches with the living spark of life. The Aries personality is creative, passionate, energetic and – at times – domineering and short-tempered. A cardinal sign ruled by the planet Mars, the Ram is great at getting things going, initiating endeavors, and infusing her enthusiasm into everything she does ”

true to herself, and her zodiac sign, mariana is a vixen. a total coquette but dangerous. we’ll get there, though !! first... lil fun fact: dance was a major part of her life, she often won competitions with flying colors and excelled in every routine taught to her.

she was seventeen when she met jacob day, captain of the college’s baseball team. their star pitcher. and eventually, her boyfriend. he was older than her, two years. but he was sweet and romantic. at least, at first. jacob day would prove to be the absolute worst thing to ever happen to her.

a few months later, he’d become a junkie, paying other kids to take the athletic drug tests for him and eventually - he got abusive. she stuck around because he had never gotten physical, only verbal. and most days he was still the same boy she thought she’d fallen in love with. most days.

he was twenty the night he died and she was eighteen the night she killed him. he’d laid a hand on her a few weeks prior to that wretched night. they were at a party, not unlike high schoolers their age who think they’re grown when they’re absolutely not. they’d gone up to the second floor of the lake house so she could find a bathroom. he grew irritated with the young girl in the bathroom and laid hands on her once again. only this time, her temper got the best of her. he was drunk, rendered a bit slower and a lot taller than her. she was quick and agile and while she tells herself that she hadn’t meant for him to die. deep down, she knows that she did. he had laid lifeless in a pool of his own blood and she had stared, her own once pristine hands stained with the crimson of the very same blood.

she had acted fast after having realized he was very much dead and washed the blood off of her hands. moments later, she was calling her late uncle’s wife, her lawful aunt and the woman who had taken over the gang her uncle once led. she showed up a while later and the two left the lake house, leaving behind a spotless bathroom and absolutely no evidence of mariana’s crimes.

she took her under her wing, agreed to protect her under the promise of her joining the gang. mariana sat a few hours later, on eliana’s couch with a fresh small tattoo on her ribcage linking her to the gang.

it didn’t take long for the leader and her to actually get to know each other, having not had any solid relationship when her uncle was alive. one year later, eliana named mariana her second in command. of course, no one understood why on earth, a girl who had just barely turned nineteen could be given such a high power. not even mariana herself understood it.

two years later, she rose to the throne following eliana’s death. by then, she had been completely molded by the late leader and had been taught everything she could possibly need. and then some. mariana was trained in combat, gang ties, suppliers and how to keep them happy as well as game plans to ensure that anarchy remain at the top.

the gang loved her, she was an intelligent girl that had lost a lot at a young age. it toughened her up. and the suppliers loved her because... she was never late on a payment.

when mariana became the leader, she shifted blake dietrich’s position to second in command. it only seemed fair, he was her best friend. her partner in crime and the sole person she absolutely trusted with her life as well as secrets. though, they’ve known each other for a lot longer than before she made him her right hand man.

they kept the gang upright together. matter of fact, anarchy had never been better since they were in charge. she was young and pretty, looked anything but what she really was. it gave anarchy the upper hand because everyone else knew exactly who their leader was but did not believe it. she was hidden in plain sight without having to hide at all.

underestimation, often drove her to do better. those who dared to be verbal with their doubts, died. she, herself, was lethal and absolutely ruthless. her middle name, mercedes meaning mercies, was the most ironic thing to have ever happened. she finds it funny and throws it in the faces of others.

“ the only merciful thing about me is in my name. ”

she and blake have spent a few months maybe even a year, on the run, after having been walking on eggshells in rosewick. as powerful as a gang can be... it’s only as powerful as its weakest member. and because of a slip up on their end, blake and mariana were compromised. of course, she would rather die than snitch on her own kind - though had they snitched, they probably wouldn’t have had to leave their home. mariana packed her bags and even blake’s before grabbing him and all but dragging him out of rosewick.

they spent some time traveling around the states, living their best lives before mari mentioned the island and now... here they are.

though, with power like mariana’s and blake’s, they’ve fallen under the santoro gang’s radar. they’re being watched with interest, the main goal being that they join them.

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 ▸

honestly, anything !!

#misplaced.intro #reposting this for all the new babes <333 #hiii !!! and welcome

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brotherdusk · 5 years ago

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transformers for 1?

thank you rowan!! <3

Favourite character: this is so hard but I think ratchet reliably brings me the most joy across all continuities

Least Favourite character: tarn is so relentlessly cruel and the djd stuff is so grimdark that I don’t get any enjoyment from reading or thinking about him

5 Favourite ships (canon or non-canon): in no particular order: minimegs, lug/anode, nightbeat/rung, magnus/swerve, simpatico

Character I find most attractive: sh. shockw. shockwave Big Pruple. P. Purp (I don’t even have an explanation for this I just see him and I go a little feral)

Character I would marry: metroplex because my god he deserves love. what a sweetheart. I care him

Character I would be best friends with: minimus and I would understand each other. I would appreciate his well-maintained spreadsheets and we could commiserate about being tiny together

a random thought: I’m genuinely really excited for the netflix show despite fandom elders and most tf pundits grumbling about it after seeing one teaser? maybe I’m just a fandom baby and every piece of fresh content is still new and exciting to me. there seem to be a couple of new twists on the old story and the way they textured the models is gorgeously stylised. even if the story is a bit shit I’m gonna watch the whole thing for the texture work

An unpopular opinion: the djd - pet dynamic isn’t cute or quirky?? do people forget that that’s A Real Person trapped and suffering in there? stop it I had to blacklist the pet on twitter because people can’t control themselves

My Canon OTP: cygate. I dare you to read the way cyclonus talks to/about tailgate in later issues and not cry because I can’t! I remember full-on sobbing in my bed when they reunited and hugged on mederi

My Non-canon OTP: nightbeat/rung because their friendship was SO sweet and they deserve better... rung balances out nightbeat’s tendency to (fatally) run at mysterious things headfirst and nightbeat genuinely cares for rung and takes the time to figure him out when most dismiss him

Most Badass Character: kup!! go grandpa holy shit. honourable mentions to wheeljack for being wheeljack, astrotrain for being a ROBOT STEAM TRAIN in SPACE and g1 unicron for orson welles’ voice acting

Most Epic Villain: I REALLY wish froid and sunder got more chances to shine because they were so disturbing and terrifying and their designs are so good! I wish there was more of them in the mutineers arc because the little we did get was so much fun. getaway being disturbed by sunder’s serial killer speeches and being taunted about his limitations by froid could have led to some really interesting exchanges if jro had had the time to explore it. in this essay I will

Pairing I am not a fan of: rung x any of his long-term vulnerable patients like skids, red alert, fort max etc. it doesn’t get me angry the way the fandom treatment of the pet does but I simply Do Not See how people manage to see those relationship dynamics in a romantic context and idk why it’s so popular or at least used to be

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): rodimus in the "bad end" of lost light didn't sit right with me for reasons that others have articulated better than me. the idea of him doing mundane things and being so discontented with it just hit a sour note like... growing up and maturing means learning to accept being terminally bored and unhappy? what? the tone of the "bad end" had multiple problems but rodimus' were most egregious I think and it lowkey hinders my enjoyment of the “good end”

Favourite Friendship: minimus and ten are almost unbearably wholesome... I hope minimus kept the miniatures ten made of him when the quest was done

Character I most identify with: rung, unfortunately. I’m comically wimpy, need glasses and would rather eat candy and construct (digital) models than admit I have ever had a problem in my entire life

Character I wish I could be: g1 ratchet (especially from what I’ve seen of the 80s comics) is just so gung-ho and delights in being snarky and doing silly shit and inventing dinosaurs all day? so Him

send me a fandom/character/ship and I’ll answer these questions

#long post #ask games #praesaepe #tf

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upthehillask · 5 years ago

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i’d love to hear your cursed child opinions!

Oh boy, well now you’ve unleashed me :D lol I don’t know if you’re interested more in what I loved or in what I’d critique, so I’ll go for both I guess? And you can read whichever you like :) But tbh you won’t hear anything new from me that you haven’t heard other fans talk about. Anyways, here are my thoughts on the actual play: [Spoiler alert I guess!]

Things I loved:

- THE MAGIC!!! The effects were EVERYTHING. The time warp, the telephone booth, the floo, the underwater, the dementors, the writings on the walls, and so much more… Really cool!!! And I loved the whole vibe and aesthetic of the play too, it felt authentic and fitting! THE SWISHY CLOAKS!! I want them!!

- The scenes I especially enjoyed were Harry’s nightmares, glimpses into his past and scenes from the books in general. I think they executed those quite well, made me really soft! Especially the scenes of little Harry in his cupboard and also him in the graveyard. Gripped my heart. Oh, I also loved that they finally showed Cedric in the end, he was so perfect!!

- Draco. Yes yes yes to dad Draco. Still bitchy, pretentious, and petty, trying so hard to play cool and tough, but a pained softie deep inside—we STAN. The relationship between him and his son I CRI EVRITIEM!!! Draco in the alternative timeline letting Scorpius do what he believes in, Draco in the real timeline hugging his son, I LIVE. And oh my god that scene where Draco walked in to Harry crying.. GOD. Yes emotions, yes vulnerability, yes bonding, yes yes yes. (Though I still can’t get over the ponytail. Would’ve been more than fine if Lucius hadn’t been portrayed with long hair lol)

- I loved Albus!! He’s a good Slytherin boy! That’s all I have to say. He’s a good friend and son who tries his best. I liked him a lot, more so now after watching the play. He really did remind me of Harry in a lot of ways. (Also, unpopular opinion, but I always loved Albus Severus’ name and I always will, fight me.)

- And just all the dad-son relationships, parenthood themes, friendship between the boys, related conflicts… Loved all of them. Touching, inspiring, couldn’t get enough!

- McGonagall was fcking ON POINT. Fcking QUEEN. Get it girl. Show em how to understand and respect children 👏👏👏

- I really loved Snape too! It was nice to finally see him being his self that only Dumbledore got to see in the books. I loved his demeanor too. I know actors change, but the one I saw portrayed Snape in a way that felt more canon. As much as I love Alan Rickman, he was a bit too graceful and sophisticated for canon Snape. In the play, however, Snape was kind of more rough, more rash, less pulled together in a way that he spoke and moved. It’s subtle but I lived for that. Also he was finally short. Yes.

- I feel like I have to mention Harry too. I actually quite liked him, so I’m gonna put him under this list as well. Yeah, that one scene where he threatened McGonagall into strict surveillance of his son is a bit much, errr 😅😅😅 But overall, I like the idea of him struggling as a father, making mistakes and learning from them. He’s a good egg.

- Ron and Hermione, my babies!! I had issues with Ron’s characterization, but I did mostly enjoy the portrayal of their relationship. I liked that their roles within the play were mostly to be together or to find their ways to each other. Since so many fans are against their ship, I was really excited to see them. And I just loved Hermione in general. They got her characterization almost on-point too, I think. I just love her 🥰

- In general, I enjoyed a lot of the dialogue. I liked all those strong, emotional one-liners that make you gasp. Harry saying things, Albus saying things, Scorpius, Draco, Ginny, others… There were good examples of lines they’d say that perfectly articulated everything that they embodied or felt or were dealing with. Well done there.

Okayyy I’m sure there’s more I could think of, definitely, but I’ll stop here since this is already a lot 😁

Things I questioned:

- So the one single biggest thing that I am the most critical of has to do with the plot itself, and it’s about Cedric turning into a Death Eater. I’m sorry but I just can’t. I could write a whole essay on how this makes no canonical sense (and I probably will if you ask me lmaoo), but to sum it up, Cedric eventually turning bitter and evil because he was publicly humiliated directly contradicts his canon character development. Cedric’s humility, kindness, and fairness are the core qualities around which Cedric’s personality was developed in the books. He almost explicitly places popularity, glory, and reputation second, and that’s critical, because if failure and humiliation were to affect him so drastically, his primary core values needed to be broken down and changed beforehand, but they never weren’t. So presenting the Triwizard incident as the turning point for him does not make any sense, and as a result the rest of the narrative falls apart. This is a plot hole and hasty writing.

- Yeah, Bellatrix having a child is still kinda weird 🙃🙃 I just hate that because in the books Bellatrix played the archetype of this anti-mother, the antithesis of motherhood and motherly love. I feel like having her voluntarily bring a child into this world destroys that symbolism. It makes me unsatisfied.

- I had some issues with the very beginning and the whole “montage” of events leading up to the fourth year. I found it overwhelming and disorienting, even though I’ve already read the script and knew what’s going on. Still, I felt like I was hit by a train, watching all the fast-paced scenes, cliché chaotic small talk going on, years going by… It felt messy for some reason. I feel like I need to watch it again in order to fully catch up and process everything I saw, and that’s not a good sign. But I didn’t hate it, I just wish we were more eased into the story.

- Scorpius. Now listen. When I read the script, Scorpius was my favorite character. I LOVED him, this awkward nerd who loves his dad and best friend with all his heart. The way I grew to imagine him was quite not how he was portrayed in the play. I know the dialogue and everything’s all the same, but idk, Scorpius in the play was way more hyper, bolder than I pictured, and worst of all, he was going out of his way to be this wannabe player. He seemed so all over the place, even acting a bit arrogant sometimes, celebrating moments of over-confidence, chasing after girls, trying to be everything BUT himself. But that honestly might just be my takeaway alone. There’s nothing actually wrong with his character, I just found myself slightly disappointed with him in the play specifically. I wish I could see the play again to actually analyze things more thoroughly to explain why I feel this way, but I can’t. I still like Scorpius, but a different version of him. (tho damn did I love those skinny pants on him lmao 👌👌)

- Moaning Myrtle. Like, I laughed, it was funny, but it just wasn’t very tasteful lol and I was left feeling a bit uncomfortable from the idea of this young murdered girl writhing and thirsting over literally everyone. The play really blew that out of proportion and idk it’s kinda awkward when I think about it 😅 And in general, there was just so much thirsting… with Rose, Polly Chapman, Delphi… Not to mention Albus kissing his AUNT… Like damn chill JK please 😂 Weird cliches and teenage hormones aren’t the only source of comedy okay?? 😂😂😂 Also, speaking of Myrtle, I kinda wish there was something mentioned about Draco having had been friends with her in sixth year. Idk it would’ve been nice to see that relationship somehow reminisced since we didn’t really get to see it :)

- Craig Bowker Jr... If he was supposed to be a parallel to Cedric, both being the spare, why did he get literally zero attention?? We don’t really know who he is, we don’t see anyone hurting because of his death, he’s killed with such apathy. We don’t even see his parent grieving, like we saw Amos (who also happen to be an integral part to the plot of CC!). The whole parallel is so incomplete. Poor Craig and his unsymbolic death..

- Ok I am obviously elaborating way too much so let me just quickly summarize the rest of things I don’t actually hate but might wanna rant about: RON IS NOT A JOKSTER—GEORGE IS. RON IS A FIGHTER. HE IS ALSO HARRY’S BEST FRIEND, NOT HERMIONE, BUT HE WAS MADE USELESS AND UNNEEDED, WHICH IS HIS ACTUAL WORST FEAR, SO WHO THE FUCK DARED. ROSE IS MORE THAN A BITCHY ROMANTIC INTEREST AND A BAD FRIEND. WHERE THE HELL IS HUGO. GINNY’S EVEN COOLER THAN SHE WAS PORTRAYED, I PROMISE. THE SURPRISE SECOND TIME TURNER ERRRR LOUSY PLOT DEVICE I’M SORRY. LACKLUSTER PLOT IN GENERAL, THE ONLY ACTUAL TWIST IS DELPHI’S REVEAL—NOT ENOUGH, JKR KNOWS BETTER THAN THIS, THE BOOKS WERE FULL OF TWISTS AND TURNS (but that’s kinda okay with me because the relationships between characters in CC really made the whole story worth it).

Alright enough :’D I’m not actually upset, just exaggerating haha Because overall, I liked the play. I wanna see it again. And I wanna analyze it more, too. I’m so excited I finally got to watch it. It’s far from flawless, but I’m still happy with it overall and want to approach it positively! Sure, I’ll rant when it’s ranting time, but I do love it (:

#the cursed child #cursed child spoilers #Q&A #Anonymous #upthehillask

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elegiesforshiva · 5 years ago

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This is a review for the amazing sasusaku fanfic Perpetual Winter by @thefangirlslair It’s a brilliant modern AU and I highly recommend it!!! You can read it on fanfiction.net or tumblr :)))) FF: c l i c kkkk Tumblr: Part I, Special Chapter, Part II And time for a criminally late and obscenely long review!!!

Pt I

Winter has never been his favorite season

Damn what an intro, I’m already getting angst vibes lmao. I really like how you set the scene and stage the world of this AU. I didn’t expect the existence of clans in this piece, with it being a modern AU, but this is such a fascinating twist on the setting to me. I loved how you described Naruto’s endurance as unnatural, “like there’s a demon living inside him” and Sasuke and his clan have inexplicable warmth….inexplicable do I dare say…fire ???? ;))))))

Lmao seriously what a great way to pay homage to canon though. I love these attributes!

Modern au Sasuke that reads poetry and drinks coffee is a brand of pretentiousness I can get behind

Aaaaaaa omg I really REALLY REALLY fucking love this intro! I love how you describe Sasuke as appreciating liveliness, and vibrance—which we can honestly assume is canon with how his two closest people are the embodiment of these traits. And I love how you tie it back into the seasons. This really gives so much life to that motif in this story, and the title. That was clever af

…he was taken back to the time where winter was just a mere season, Bon Iver was playing on their shared earphones, and Sakura was his.

WHAT THE FUCK YOU JUST FUCKING DESTROYED ME WHAT A WAY TO SEGWAY INTO THE NEXT SCENE OOOOF IM KSJDFHLJSAKFL

There are so many things I love about this following scene… you really know how to write a couple in casual, mutual love. The banter and candidness of their interaction just has me floored. I also REALLY love that this is from Sasuke’s perspective, and how even though he doesn’t have an overwhelming amount of dialogue, we’re in his head, and his appreciation and love for Sakura just radiates. Lines like these:

From her latest discovered band to a recent discovery in medicine by a genius dude whose name he doesn’t even remember, she shares it with him. Favorite anime character, favorite memory with him, favorite pair of underwear — he knows it all because she’s that open to him about things she love.

They’re just….so good. I can hear his voice, his ardor, and his impeccable understanding of Sakura’s personality while also expressiong his own. The choice of having the narrative skewed through his lens was def a good decision. And ugh this piece is just overwhelmingly amazing already

He doesn’t know the pain to be dealt with when you’ve broken up with someone because Sakura was his first girlfriend. And honestly, he doesn’t, couldn’t, even think about being apart from her. Just the thought of them breaking up already makes him panic a little. He always thought to himself, ‘I will never let that happen.’

Okay this paragraph……………this paragraph tho……..dropping this. KNOWING. They’re gonna break up……….HOW DARE U

Seriously, what powerful writing. I don’t know how you do it……

I think it’s incredibly interesting that you chose music to be the catalyst for this beautiful, climactic moment of closeness My best friend/partner and I have had convos before about it, and she and i once talked about how we think of sex with music lol. I don’t know how to entirely explain myself on that, or where I’m really going with this, but I get the same vibe here too. Music that’s close to you is like an artistic intimacy and there’s something very personal and vulnerable about it. Maybe it’s an auditory thing, like getting lost in one of those guided meditations. (idk if you’ve ever had one that actually worked, they don’t always for me, but when they do god damn, it’s unreal) Either way, I really loved the way this scene played out, it was highly relatable and highly emotional, and I feel serenity and ardor just reading it. Beautifully done.

I love the way you moved back to the present and we immediately feel the differences and the similarities. The fondness and affection is still there, if not a little more muted, and it’s so obvious they still have feelings for each other. But there’s definitely moments that speak to their separation too, with the little differences in Sakura that Sasuke notices, or instances like her no longer drinking coffee or him deciding to open the door.

I really like how you inserted the interaction with Kakashi too. One thing I’m quickly noticing about this fic and your writing is how you very stealthily relay information to us readers. It’s seamless and entertaining, and I’m learning about this world and the past in ways that are so attention grabbing I don’t even notice it.

Also Itachi’s death and the way you handled it from Sasuke’s pov is so reminiscent of canon and also so gut wrenching. The lines

How dare Itachi leave him alone? How dare Itachi sacrifice himself and die? How dare Itachi pass his responsibilities onto his shoulders…

especially gutted me because of how is stands in stark parallels to the Sasuke we know in canon. This really smacked my head around with feels….poor Sasuke

OMFG POOR SASUKE !!!?!?!??!?!??!? THAT ENDING OOOLOGDSLGFSLKDGHLSDHFLKDFHVSLKV WHAT A FUCKING CURVE BALL LMAO

I mean maybe I should have seen that coming because like of course!!! But also I’M LOSING M Y SHIT HAHAHAHAAA

I can’t wait to see how this unfolds!!!!!

Special Chapter

This is such a powerful scene to start with. Itachi’s entire character was such a major influence in canon and seeing the way his death is affecting everyone now is so emotional. I feel so bad for Sasuke, having to take on all the burdens Itachi had left behind for him.

Also these lines:

“Mikoto cried, “Don’t you think it’s too soon? I just buried my first-born just barely a week ago and now we’re discussing how you’re gonna ruin my youngest’s life just like you did with Itachi?!”

The way her voice cracked when she said his brother’s name broke his heart. She’s still grieving, probably forever, and here they are talking about Sasuke’s suicide.”

Literally killed me. Dead. Deceased. Fallen to the Void. It’s so brilliant and powerful, and speaks so deeply on their dysfunctional family dynamics and feelings with so few lines. Really loved this…

This next scene was so stark and sad and beautiful. I meant to comment and pull lines again, but I couldn't stop reading tbh. Sasuke's thoughts and emotions concerning Sakura are so vividly gentle and full of praise. There's such a soft worship in the way you write his feelings towards her and tbh it's my absolute and only interpretation of feelings I care for concerning the depiction of their relationship. Still, you do this with a certain cleverness and mastery. It's really so moving for me...

The dream sequence that follows is absolutely debilitating, but so well done. I got the sense it was a dream only a few lines in just from the bluntness of the lines. It was truly very dream-like lol. I really could feel the panic and guilt along all of his inner turmoil. It's incredibly horrific to have such a dream about murder just after Itachi's too. This was devastating.

I really loved the way Sakura calms him groom the panic/anxiety attack. I've actually had a similar experience once, where I woke up from a nightmare and I was very frightened and stiff and couldn't really articulate myself. I remember I had felt deep horror and self loathing and nothing else. (I still remember the nightmare too, it was horrible.) My best friend at the time just threw herself on the bed and held me.

It's so crazy how grounding touch can be. I really felt that with Sasuke and Sakura too. The comfort she offers him is so seamless to her character and so ardently palpable. The repetition of "I got you" really touched me especially. It breaks my heart knowing the inevitable end of their relationship to come.

Oooooohhhh daaamnnnnn

I did NOT see the raunchy sex coming lmfao!! Although in hindsight, I probably should have. You already told us how they tend to get down and dirty when emotions run high with the arguments and make-up sex. I imagine this is instigated by Sasuke often, with him struggling to articulate his need for Sakura verbally so he does so physically. And I imagine Sakura is just kinky enough to crave this sort of animal want.

I do love how sexual interactions are easily moving in tandem with their emotions, how it just feels like another mode of communication. Sasuke breaking down during it leaves me feeling so tender too. It's tragic

She smiled. Sasuke doesn't know if he wants that smile or not.

These exit lines are going to fucking kill me istg

The following events honestly hurts to read because Damn haven't we all been there... the fallout of a relationship to the point where you're just dragging it through the mud… it’s a true deterioration of soul and you capture that slow death so well. I really feel terrible for Sakura—Sasuke too—but it sucks for her to be in the dark like this.

I love the way you write Karin!!! Honestly, I think it really mirrors the way she's written in canon. She's cold and strategically loud and generally calculating and overall kind of apathetic. She doesn't really know the value of meaningful relationships (and therefore doesn't prioritize them) until much later on in the series. I definitely get this sense of her here too. She's a little cold, but not cruel, and she has the pragmatic values of her and Sasuke's union in mind as she agrees to it all. I really like how you made her personality come through here.

Meanwhile there’s him, sucking all the hard traits from their father. His competitive streak, arrogant way of speaking, harsh words — it’s all Fugaku. And suddenly, he feels so exhausted.

This line hit me so hard. I love this fic already for an endless number of reasons but a striking one is how well you interrogate the relationships between family. When you described Itachi’s death as Sasuke losing a part of him, I really felt that. And here when you write about the way Sasuke takes after Fugaku and hates it and is also exasperated from it, just like how his father likely is, it just runs bone deep. You really know how to speak to life experiences and relationships in consistently intimate ways. I love that about you

This is his reality now — no more dream, no more Itachi; and pretty soon, no more Sakura.

’It hurts,’ Sasuke thought. 'It hurts, aniki.’

Wow death by angst lmao thanks for the pain, maren, glad to know you like to torture your readers as much as our ninja babies. Srsly tho the cadence of these lines and the material itself sync up perfectly. It’s such powerful writing

This entire scene is stuffed to the brim with dread and turbulence, and it’s so lifelike, I feel it’s haunting. The way you describe the suffocating atmosphere of the car ride, how Sasuke snaps at Sakura for simply knowing that something is up, the awkwardness of the dinner… You really brought so much passion into these scenes, I feel like I’m being tortured right with them lol

I looooooove the drama of this playing out omg. The way you have this convo go down is like a punch to the gut. Sakura announcing her acceptance to Harvard, and then her refusal to go. Sasuke knowing he’s the reason why…the guilt…the anger…

Also omfg these lines:

Sasuke hardened his resolve and stiffly said, “No. I don’t need you, Sakura.”

’Yes, I do.’

Sakura shook her head, “Yes, you do.”

I DIED. Sakura callin’ him out on his bull shit I fucking LOST IT lmaooOOooo I love this so much and I love how you write their dynamic! It’s funny how this fic plays into a lot of romantic clichés but also subverts them—gives them a twist that knocks the reader right off their feet. It’s honestly incredible

I loved the way you brought in winter into this scene too. The image of it, the feel of it, the terrible, lonely tone. It suits the entire mood of it all.

This is going to sound super dumb but I genuinely love how much agency you give Sakura btw. You probably know I’m a raging, batshit feminist by now and I gotta say, her dialogue is consistently powerful and reeks of someone who knows who they are, and their worth, even when in the fallout of a relationship where they are getting the short end of the stick. Like I’m just sitting here reading “Sasuke, you dumb jackass, what are you doing” lmfaoooo LIKE GURL I WOULD TREAT U SO GOOD…. SAKU BB IM SO SORRY BUT ALSO TRUST I KNOW HOW IT BE

I really do love it. And I love how you wrote Sakura as an orphan too. It really flips the script on the canon material (eat shit, kishimoto!! Women can have trauma and real backstories not centered around men, u misogynistic pile of adskjfhsklhfalkd) I just feel she’s very well written, and tangible, and powerfully human. I’d be just as smitten as Sasuke tbh

The last scene is so upsetting… it’s also strangely warming too though. It’s terrible Sasuke’s been broken down like this, but there’s something about this scene where he feels raw, and expresses his pain in a very infantile way, literally crying out to his mother about how it hurts. I really feel he’s been stripped of not just his life, but himself, under the weight of Itachi’s death and all that’s come with it, and it makes my heart ache. I loved this chapter, in all it’s infinite sadness.

Part II

He closed his eyes and thought about his talk with his father earlier, “We’re okay now. He called me while I was with Itachi.”

Love the ease and depth of this single line of dialogue. How Itachi is not alive but is still with him, and how it speaks to the way we humans grieve and the continuity and strength of relationships even after someone leaves. It’s just very simple and human, and it popped out at me.

He couldn’t even remember the last time they talked on the phone, or the last time he heard Fugaku as a father, not as the Uchiha patriarch.

Uggghhhhhhh this is exactly how I felt Fugaku was like in canon too. This fic is just full of brilliance, I really adore the way you describe all the relationships, but the complexity between Sasuke’s and Fugaku’s is really striking to me. You nail it perfectly.

And this whole intro where Fugaku apologizes to Sasuke and tells him he is proud…. I feel as if a major levee has been broken. While he’s in front of Itachi’s grave too. This Sasuke really has that same parallel with the one in canonverse where I feel he is held back by his family trauma, family obligations, the weight of blood. And this scene feels like a breaking point. Where Sasuke can be a man instead of an Uchiha, in the same way Fugaku gives him this moment as a father instead of an Uchiha patriarch. It certainly feels like a cleansing of sorts.

Once you thought you’re over it, one pink-haired beacon of spring will bloom in your eternal winter and blow all your progress into next week. What a woman. He will never find anyone better.

AaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA !!!! this IS what I mean!!! His inner thoughts of her ugh….i’m so weak…Sasuke you lovesick fool…. And the return of the beautiful seasons motif. I love this so much

You can say they were drunk — with liquor, with each other, with love.

I just adore this line. It really emphasizes the vibe of their past relationship and the picture as a whole, and just that electric feeling of being consumed with someone. The description and cadence of it is just really catching, and I love it

God, this entire scene. Damn, maren. It’s criminal how well you write the tension of such a casual conversation. It feels as if an interrogation of sorts is occurring, and yet it’s still a heartwarming kind. Sakura is not vicious or mal-intentioned in inquiries and yet it still leaves Sasuke weak and defenseless if only because of his feelings for her. There’s so many ways you assert it too. It’s in every line, every detail. This one in particular stood out to me:

Sasuke clenched his fist under the table and scoffed, “I hope my mother didn’t tell you how miserable I was.”

'Still am,’ he corrected in his mind. 'How miserable I still am.’

I remember you used this particular tactic when also describing Itachi’s feelings from Sasuke’s POV. (Something along the lines of how he does became how he did because he is gone) In this fic where time is moving back and forward in a non-linear fashion, these details are especially striking. Despite the changes and pushes and pull, this one fact is consistent—Sasuke loves Sakura. And we, as readers, relearn it with every line.

Also I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOvE that Mikoto saw Sakura off, and that there is this undertone of a bond. Like ughhhhh I’ve so been there, where there’s that depth of understanding between women and relationships that men don’t always know about or know how to grapple with it. My ex resented me for it lmfao

Adkjfasklfalsjdkfakls SASUKE CAN RELATE TO HIM APPARENTLY AHAHAHAAHHA B SNAPPEDDDD I totally get it though, it’s a little intrusive of Sakura to ask for that, but we all also know why she did. Poor saku bb is in love with this emotionally constipated idiot lmao. Oh I love the endless pining and miscommunication of it all !!!

“I thought you’d be here,” a voice came and knocked on the closed door of his heart. He turned his face towards it, he saw her and suddenly his doors came opening again.

The winter sun was directly behind her, giving her this eerie glow. Like a nymph; a spring nymph being born in his perpetual winter. He shivered inside.

Back at it again with that seasonal motif !!!! ugh you are killing me. I also really loved the phrase “knocked on the closed door of his hear.” You really have such a way with these metaphors and images, it’s so striking and makes the narrative of this piece so brilliant

and silence is a comfortable companion back then. When they became lovers, it was like their platonic third-wheel aside from Naruto.

Ngl I busted out laughing on that one. “aside from Naruto” hahaaaa I love the way you include him in this fic tbh. He’s not a very big focus, but he still feels like an integral part of this story, not just as Sasuke’s best friend, but also as another device to unite Sasuke and Sakura. Also he’s pretty fantastic comic relief, probably just as much for the two of them as for the reader.

I really love the way this convo goes down, and the change of scenery from the coffee shop to the playground. Considering the way their love at this point is founded in nostalgia (and perhaps something else, but let’s ignore that for a second) it’s so fitting for them to finally stripping away the masks and cloaks and being genuine with one another—Sakura talking about how she knew all along, and Sasuke finally admitting he still loves her.

I also loved that Karin broke off the engagement!!!!!! And how she did it and how you described it ughghhghg I love this. You really spoke to her character growth and development in canon too. It’s trivial compared to everything else that’s going on, but I love it.

…the pink of her hair, the green of her irises and the gold of the sun slowly setting down behind her.

Sasuke couldn’t see her clearly anymore, only the faint glow of her weeping eyes and the halo on her head made by the sun.

You think you’re slick don’t you…you think you’re some kind of mastermind with these subtle references/images…..well guess what bitch….YOU ARE

I looooove how you tied the music back in. Ugh this departure!! MY HEART!!! Also I’m seeing a handful of songs I love including OUR BOIIIII !!!! rex orange county uhhghhgjak maren this is the romance of a lifetime I AM WEAK

Ughh the forehead kiss…..that was so sweet. I loved Sakura’s choice to give him that bit of affection. This scene is so beautifully intimate, despite their positions.

Omg I FINISHED HOLY SHIT!!! And Sasuke doesn’t get back with her! Wow! Honestly, as much as my shipper heart is like, violently frothing at the mouth and saying “okay they totally got back together down the line tho like THEY HAD TO THEY ARE MADE FOR EACH OTHER WHAT IS TH—" I actually have such a deep appreciation for this ending. Their relationship in this almost feels dream-like, and with the way the story unfolds, even if they still loved each other in the end (and I really don’t doubt that they do. We don’t have Sakura’s perspective, but we also don’t need it. the affections are clear) it doesn’t mean they will end up together or are even really suited for each other in such a way.

Their love in this actually really reminds me of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Have you seen that movie? I just really get that vibe at the end. This entire romance cuts very deep and is very passionate and leaves me feeling so whimsical. I really loved this story, Maren… thank you for sharing it with all of us. thank you for writing it. You’re really one of a kind and you and this story has my whole heart <333

Also I’m sorry this is so late, but when I said I am going to write you a review, what I meant was I am going to write you a review. This English degree is good for nothing but sending elaborate love letters to friends and writers in the form of literary analyses and stupid overreactions and BY GOD I WILL NOT LET THIS CRIPPLING COLLEGE DEBT GO TO WASTE !!!

#sasusaku #ss fanfiction #ik its been like a year im sorry #but ily and ur my fav 5evr pls marry me maren my love

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lostincalum · 6 years ago

Text

Dawn- Ashton Irwin

AN: okay, who is ready for pure fucking angst, with a fluffy ending? idk

Word count: Bro, almost 3000

TW: some swearing, some mentions of abuse (not really in depth tho)

previous parts: Midnight

If Midnight was when you saw Ashton for who he was, dawn would be when he saw you for who you were.

It was after Ashton had stayed over for the first time. It was a weekend, so he didn’t have to get up all that early. Yet, Ashton groaned as the alarm on your phone went off. The two of you barely fit on the dorm bed and after the a long night of being too hot and cramped up, Ashton still pulled you closer.

“Why the fuck is there an alarm set for now?”

He groaned into your collarbone, trying to stop you from moving away, when you pulled the covers off from you and tucked them in under his ribcage.

“Cause I’m gonna go for a run, Ash. I’ll be back soon.”

You whispered as you pulled off the black sweater of his you had borrowed to sleep in. Neither of you were hungover, but Ashton seemed drunk on sleep, as he lifted his head up. Curls were dangling in his eyes, and sticking up in all directions, making him more dishelved than when you had gone to sleep.

“Didn’t we burn enough calories last night?”

He was always a little cheeky, but right now everything felt just slightly out of place. Even Ashton, the man you had been dating for some time now, felt a bit odd in your room. As if he noticed that something was wrong when no clever retort escaped you, he sat up in the bed. Scrunching his eyebrows together in confusion.

“Hey, you alright?”

All the feelings you had bottled up, ever since you had met Ashton were somehow begging to be let out, you could feel your fingers not knowing where to be as you quickly got dressed.

“Angel, talk to me?”

It came out as a question though, like he didn’t want to break you. Like all other questions, you avoided it.

“Look, I’m gonna go for a run, if you want to you can stay here.”

You were standing in front of the mirror, tying your hair up your hair, when he suddenly stood behind you. Not really touching you, just being near you. Before he had a chance to do something, you hurried out the door.

-------

The lighting when you came out, was dull. Nothing had been touched by the sun yet, and everything was quiet, except for a few birds. It felt like your heart was not getting all the blood it needed. It felt like the air around you was dense. It felt like nothing in the world was right. It felt like yet another panic attack.

So you found it best to stop, and go through the easier things, like your name, and number. Then where you came from, and where you live now. Then Ashton, the picture of him in your bed became too much. Tears pressed on as you sat down on the little wooden jetty near the ocean. Little gasps for air sounded as 6:30 rolled around, and another body sat down beside yours.

“Hey, lay back for me?”

It was Calum, Ashton’s best friend. You had met him a handful of times, but under different circumstances. Mostly joyful ones. This was not what you wanted.

“I’m sorry, I’m gonna hea-”

Calum interrupted quickly, looking at you with worries in his eyes.

“Just trust me, it will help with breathing.”

You went out on a limb and decided to trust him. Carefully laying down as sobs racked your body almost soundlessly.

Then he got up, stood with one leg on either side of your thighs and lifted your hips. Suddenly air rushed to your lungs, flowing down like silk. After a couple of minutes like that, he carefully set your hips down, and returned to his previous seat.

“How’d you know to do that?”

The question tumbled out from your lips as overlooked the sea. it had changed from the faded grey shade, to a more lively pink hue that covered the reflection in the water.

“I have taken so many footballs to the stomach, that’s usually the quickest way to gain back breath.”

Calum always had this easy going, yet still thoughtful nature about him. It made him easy to talk to.

“You know my ex? Max? he was very kind in the beginning, but I don’t know, everything just went so wrong, I don’t even know where to begin”

It felt good to get it off your chest for the first time, yet you still regretted that it hadn’t been to Ashton.

“D’you want my advice?”

All it took from you was a slight nod, with curious eyes, that met his deep brown ones.

“Write it down, figure out how you want to articulate it, and bring it Ash, let him read it, let him understand. The worst thing he knows is not understanding, the worst thing for you guys is not sharing stuff like this.”

It made you think, because it made sense, you were just so scared of how Ashton would take it.

Max had always been around as you grew up, not in the sense that you used to be best friends, but that he was always in your peripheral vision. Until the end of high school closed in. He had started with charming his way in, with playing on all the good sides he had, all the little things he had noticed while being in your peripheral vision. After the two of you broke up, he was angry, frustrated, and perhaps a little vengeful.

So when Ashton came knocking on your door after a night out with his friends, you expected him to be fired up and ready to go out on an adventure. He wasn’t. You opened the door to a beaten and battered Ashton.

You stared at him with wide eyes and numb arms, as the door closed behind him.

“What the hell Ash? what’s happened?”

He groans as he sits down on your bed

“Some random guy came up and just started hitting me!”

Now this should have been red flag number one, but you were to caught up in trying to clean up his wounds. He was truly battered, with bruises on his ribcage, a split lip and brow. How anyone might have gotten the best of Ashton you didn’t know. And that might have been red flag number two.

“Please tell me you got some hits in too?”

You whispered as he hissed, when you dabbed the rubbing alcohol on his lip.

“Of course I did, but I can’t say I won though.”

Ashton looked down on the floor.

“Hey, you can’t win every fight you know?”

The words seemed to do little to console him, so you left a quick peck on his lip as you finished with the rubbing alcohol. Then you moved on to clean his eyebrow, where the blood had crusted. You finished up without getting the liquid in Ashton’s eye, and sat down on his lap.

“I just don’t get what he would do that for?”

Grabbing his head with both your hands, you made him look at you. The light from the sunrise hitting his hair making it look like a halo of sorts.

“You have done nothing to deserve random guys beating you up. Ok? Nothing”

It wasn’t an argument, it was reassurance, and Ashton seemed to register it. Because his hands snaked around your hips and interlaced at the back, pulling you close to him. He then leaned back, falling down on your mattress with you on top.

“Oooww, okay, that was a bad idea.”

Ashton groaned out as you looked at him with worries eyes.

“I’m fine babe, I swear. Now come on, it’s dawn and I don’t think you’ve been sleeping again.”

This time it was his eyes that held an immense worry in the beautiful hazel irises.

“Okay.”

It was the only thing you could think of to say as the both of you settled into the all to small dorm bed.

----

Later that sunday you were sitting at your usual cafe, where you studied. When the chair across from you scraped over the floor, you looked up from your notes.

A blonde guy, with too familiar, green eyes was sitting across from you. Max. Your entire face turned into a scowl as you stared at him. Waiting for him to speak up.

“Aren’t you gonna ask me why I’m here?”

He asked, voice smooth as honey, slower than syrup and utterly sickening.

“I know why you’re here. You’re here to study, to make new friends and save the unsaveable, or perhaps you’re just bitter and want to fuck up my life as it is now.”

The anger in your voice was obvious, as you tried to stare him down. He was not budging though.

“C’mon, I’ve changed, I’m not the man you left anymore.”

As if to empathise what he said, he leaned forwards trying to grab your hand.

“I didn’t leave a man, I left a manipulative douche of a boy.”

You said as you pulled your hand from his clammy grip.

“That’s not fair, baby, you weren’t exactly grown up either.”

Quietly you started to pack up all your stuff, being careful so he didn’t notice. It wasn’t that hard either, considering Max never was good at paying attention.

“No I wasn’t, but I did have a moral compass, even if you clouded it sometimes.”

Just as you were about to stand up, the door dinged as another person walked into the cafe. You looked up, in fear of it being somebody who would tell Ashton. Turnes out you didn’t have to be afraid of that. The person that entered was Ashton himself.

“Y/N, what are you doing with him?”

Ashton looked like the epitome of confusion and perhaps a bit jealousy.

“Nothing, I was just leaving, do you wanna come?”

At this Max also got up, giving Ashton a smug smile, trying to put an arm around your shoulder. Quickly you took a step forwards, as his hand fell to his side. Ashton seemed to notice the fear that radiated in your body language, and reached out a hand, that you gratefully clinged on to.

“Let’s go Y/N.”

To be honest you thought, that could have gone so much worse. Until you noticed Max following you, making you tighten your grip on Ashtons hand. He looked down on you in worry, before turning around and looking at Max.

“Dude, just leave us alone.”

Ashton said as he stopped dead in his tracks.

“No, the slut needs to know where she belongs.”

Without hesitation, you let go of Ashtons right hand, as it pulled back to gain momentum, before smacking straight into Max’s face. A gross sound of bones crunching sounded through the street, as Ashton stepped away, and blood started rushing from Max’s broken nose.

“That was for me, and my girl!”

At that point you didn’t need any more flags. Because everything suddenly clicked. Max had actually, well at least tried to, beat up Ashton.

“Don’t ever fucking dare, come near us ever again, or so help me God, Max, you will be reported to the police for all the stuff you did to me. Your dad isn’t in this state to save you.”

With that you grabbed Ashtons hand, and stormed away from the scene. Shying away from the crowd of people that started to from. As soon as you reached your dorm, Ash stopped you, with furrowed brows and worried eyes, only increasing it when he saw the state you were in. Tears streamed down your face, and he though you weren’t breathing.

“Hey, what’s going on? you need to breathe angel.”

Suddenly it felt like everything was out of place again, just slightly. He wasn’t supposed to see you like this, you were supposed to be the strong, independent girl he first met. Not crying because of some blast from the past.

“I’m so sorry Ash, you need to go.”

It hurt to say it, at it hurt even more when you saw his face, so disappointed and scared.

“Please just go”

Was all that you managed to choke out. And when he left, he slammed the door in frustration, which caused you to jump in fright.

iii

After leaving your dorm, Ashton went back to his apartment, that he rented with his three best friends.

“Thank god you’re back, I really need my coffee right now”

Calum came from around the corner, the two other boys following closely behind him, having heard the door slam. They don’t expect to see Ashton as much in disarray as he is. His hair stood up in every direction, and his eyes never stopped searching the place. As if looking for something. It caused them to stop. All of them saw the lack of coffee, but none of them knew how to ask.

“What’s going on, bro?”

The words come from Calum and finally Ashton meets his eyes.

“I don- she asked me to leave?”

Ashton spoke as if he couldn’t believe what had happened. And finally, the tears fell from his eyes. First a single one and the more.

“I- I think she might have had a panic attack. And she asked me to leave, I just don’t get it.”

-------

That night he didn’t sleep. All he did was sit in the kitchen trying to put everything together, to figure out what he had done wrong. Maybe he had been too much when he figured out that the Max dude knew Y/N, or maybe you didn’t like him being violent, but nothing made sense.

Ashton is still awake at 5:46 when someone knocks at the door. He does not think of the time, or the fact that any normal person would use the bell. So he opens the door, and finds his angel standing there, in one of his old hoodies and ripped skinny jeans.

“Hi”

Your voice was shy, and barely above a whisper. You even had your glasses on, and Ashton couldn’t stop himself. His face melted into a smile, and he reached out a hand and pulled you into the apartment. He really wanted to hug you, but stopped himself, unsure of where the two of you stood.

“Hey, Angel”

The way she fiddled with her hands, he could tell something was on her mind. Quickly he decided he should let her tell him when she’s ready.

“You want some tea? I think we still have some from the last time you were here.”

All she did was nod, and look around the place. Ashton took the lead into the kitchen, and started making some tea.

“I was gonna give you this letter, but I think it’s better if we talk.”

He turned to look at your nervous expression, and could tell by the wrinkle in between your brows that you really didn’t want to.

“Okay, cause I have some questions I would like to ask, but, you can talk to me too, you know that right? relationships are a two way street.”

He said before letting her continue.

“Yeah, I’m starting to realise.”

Ashton handed you the now finished cup of tea, and lead the way to the sofa.

“Who was that guy?”

You can feel the bitter smile on your lips, along with a cold laugh.

“My ex. My dickhead ex.”

Now it’s Ashtons turn to feel a bitter feeling growing in his chest.

“He was this really self- entitled asshole, and his dad was a cop in my old hometown, I really thought I was through with him, but it doesn’t seem like that.”

Carefully took the tea cup from your hand, and put it on the coffee table, before he laced his fingers with yours.

“He started out really sweet, but when we got further into the relationship, he wanted me to cut contact with all of my friends, especially the guys. But I didn’t, so he hit me, and it was only once, it isn’t a big deal. But when I went to the police station, his dad was there, He just shook his head at me, even though he saw the bruise on my eye. So I broke up with Max and moved here.”

You didn’t notice the tears that streamed down your face, but once Ashton brushed them away, it all felt okay, a little less bad and misplaced.

“Hey, you know, a lot of things could have happened, but the fact that you got away, the fact that you are here,is so much more important than your past. And I’ll help you no matter what happens.”

At that point you didn’t want to hold back anymore, you were tired and grateful.

“Sleep with me?”

A content expression covered his face, as he lay down and pulled you down in front of him on the couch. Then he pulled a blanket over the both of you, before whispering quietly.

“I love you.”

You grabbed the back of his hand, lacing his fingers with yours and whispered back.

“Love you too, so much.”

-----

The next morning Calum is the first to wake up. He spent some time on his phone, before getting out of bed, and walking into the living room. The sight that met him was not what he was expecting. Cause on the sofa lay Ashton and Y/N spooning, and looking very soft.

#ashton irwin #ashton fluff #ashton angst #ashton imagine #ashton 5sos #ashton #5sos #5seconds of summer #5sos fluff #5sos fic #ashton fic #5sos angst #5sos imagine

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forwardiscalling · 6 years ago

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Favorite production of Bare + why? And what is one thing that people do or don't do during productions that you hate? (Personally I hate it when productions make Jason seem super violent and like shoving and yelling at Peter all the time. They're eager to show that side of him but shy away from the soft tender side). And what's one thing that productions do that you love/wish they would include more?

listen my thoughts are organized -2% of the time so if u wanna read this mess go for it but I’ve only seen the LA version, the 2004 version, and the musical and i recently listened to the 1999 demo so i decided to include that too also i may or may not have finished these??? idk i get sad over bare hella easy so i have to plan when i watch these because they screw me up for a solid couple days after

LA 2013-literally everyone has seen this one but i love peter and jasons chemistry in this one?? also i just love the jason/nadia relationship in this one bc it is clear that nadia cares about him so much. essentially i love jason in this?? i also like father in this one because of the way he holds himself. it is clear that he is rigid to his faith and he fully believes every word of the bible. pilgrams hands in this is the best?? i love the way peter confidently is able to do that!!

2004- i love how the depict peter in this one. they show peter as this kid who wants to come out, but is unsure how the reaction will be? (i can’t articulate this as well as someone else could,, it was a post comparing la peter and micheal ardan as peter I’m so sorry i can’t remember who’s) but i ABSOLUTLY love all the confessional songs in this. cross and absolution??? HEARTBREAKING confession??? BEAUTIFUL and my final thought about this one is birthday bitch, low-key love the new lines even if it is way worse

1999 demo-EPIPHANY IS SUCH A FUCKING BOP LIKE PLEASE LISTEN TO IT LIKE I SHOULD NOT BEING BOPPING THIS HARD BUT I AM. i dont love some of the more unfamiliar songs but see me? even more heartbreaking because claire tries to avoid the topic more. in warning its so sad because claire like blames herself?(problematic ik) I’m not sure how to describe it but like she truly believes that this is not best for her child and she blames herself for this. i do like the storyline that claire isn’t THAT homophobic better but that’s just me. the are you there? is a little confusing because it is technically called cut from the same cloth and it is just matt i believe. but the stupid second thoughts??? BEAUTIFUL i love this so so so much because the last line is “so goodnight my love, yes you heard me right you were my love but ill have to let those words fall on your sleeping ears so i won’t see your honestly” and i UGLY SOBBED at that and he says “i should be the hero you want me to be” AND AHHHHH also bare???? UGLY SOBBING but real talk idk what’s going on??? like where they planning to come out??? “one stolen kiss and everyone will know” or is that referring to best kept secret??? “i really never thought it would end like this” AHHHHHHHHHHHHH also jason’s love confession followed by peter saying :i never thought you’d say it”??? BREAKING MY HEART no voice, i don’t love when they overlapped peter+matt’s parts but it is interesting how they go together. also the new verse with the whole bridge theme? AHHH SO GOOD but if anyone is down to explain the plot of this demo to me i would be so down bc a sis is low-key confused

musical- yes i know i know its terrible but i do like some of the new musical elements to it? for example, best friend? great,, pls don’t attack me for this but i like the are you and i and portrait of a girl? and i do like jason’s version of role of a lifetime and this point i will defend with my life. also peter is so adorable in this you cant change my mind on that one. in are you there “stupid stolen moments, this can’t all there is” IS SO AHHHHH also they changed the “one day he’ll wake up” to “one day SHE’LL” and damn. my absolute FAVORITE PART of this whole mess is in the middle of you and i when peter says that he has a bigger dick than jason i screamed the first time i saw it its fine lol also i didnt fully finish this whoopsie

things i hate/like about productions- i love it when peter+jason have these little moments in big groups (ex: in LA production in wonderland when jason offers clothes to matt and peter makes that little dont you dare!! thing) also lemme tell you, the you and i makes or breaks the production for me because i feel like if the you and i has no chemistry or pizzaz than that’s IT MAN game o v e r and also, i love it when they have confessionals on stage and when father is facing the audience and the children are facing him because this to me shows the disconnect between father and the kids. ok finally, i hear what you’re saying about jason being mean, but i actually kinda like it? but this is because i feel like it makes it more realistic? it shows what kind of emotional distress he was under and while that behavior is not okay in any sense, i feel like it would not have the same impact without it. and now the things i H A T E first one: nadia and jason not having a tight relationship/only moment is plain jane fatass. this relationship is SO important?? depict it well u cowards! also matt?? i dont love it when they DONT depict him as an uptight kinda guy. like this dude constantly has a stick up his ass and is NOT happy about it fam. we all know it

ok thats all my thoughts and clearly i have a ton of them so ask me questions

#bare a pop opera #peter simmonds #jason mcconnell

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