#idiris the plague

[irageneveart]

Female killers from DBD with a self harming fem S/O? I’m not doing too well lately and would like my fav characters to cheer me up ^^’ sorry if this is annoying, you can just ignore it if you want

awww hi dear, I’m sorry you are feeling like this. if you need a place to rant or just someone to talk to I’m here! 🧡 hopefully these will cheer you up a little! I wrote for every female killer in DBD and it got long, I hope you don’t mind and you’ll enjoy!

Female Killers x fem S/O

Warnings: self harm

The Huntress / Anna

Anna has never been jollier than the day you moved in with her. A sweet lovely girl like you was all she ever wanted.

One day, coming from a hunt with meat for dinner, she saw you cleaning the windows around the house. That day was warmer than usual in the Red Forest, so you had a short T-shirt. You didn’t realize when it got pulled up from moving around

oh how she loved seeing you taking care of the house, of her. but…what are those marks on your belly?

she put down the rabbits she hunt, coming right at you and swiping you off your feet, bridal style. needless to say she scared you shitless for a moment, but then you smiled

“Oh God, Anna, you scared me! Welcome back!” you nudged into her and she did the same, going to a chair and placing you in her lap. Her hand went down to your stomach, her real concern. Your smile faded

“Anna, wait, please- ” you tried to stop her but with no avail, words won’t come out, and Anna didn’t stop

“Who hurt малышка?” she asked concerned. You shook your head

“No one, Anna, my love, I-” you stopped. You could see her eyes on you, you couldn’t lie to her. You inhaled deeply, and answered despite shaking “Myself. I did…I did this myself.”

silence. There was silence for a while, her calloused hands were caressing your skin, seemingly in deep thoughts, while you didn’t know what to say. She finally spoke

“You not happy?”

“No no no, my dear Anna” you cupped her face, your eyes glossy. “I am, I’m so happy to be here, to be with you, I really am.” You nervously smiled. “Just, sometimes… sometimes I feel too much. I feel I don’t deserve all of this, all your love and care. I’m afraid. When I do it just makes me focus on one thing and…I don’t know.” you exhaled, tired. Anna touched your cheek, making you look at her.

“Love is for you. What you do and are, I love. And I want help. нет.” she furrowed her eyebrows for a moment, her eyes never leaving yours. “I want to help.”

your smile crossed from ear to ear, your sweet Russian girlfriend smiling back at its sight

“Thank you, Anna. Thank you so much. YA lyublyu… teb-tebya?” you tried, and when Anna chuckled, you felt your chest filling with butterflies.

“And I love you. More.” She rested her forehead against yours, and you knew right there things are going to be fine.

The Nurse / Sally Smithson

Sally wasn’t one to talk to other killers too much, or any person for that matter, but your presence was bringing her peace

she liked to hear you talking, to hear your stories or the places you have seen in your human life. One day, as you two were walking around The Chapel, you saw a flower in one corner. It was bright yellow, being in contrast with the dark colors of the walls surrounding the area

“Wait here!” you said excited and let go of your girlfriend’s hand. Unfortunately, not paying attention to your surroundings, you stumbled over a piece of iron left from the destroyed construction. It cut through your thin pants and skin, right on your calf

The Nurse was by your side in a blink, her cold delicate hands being around your calf before you could comprehend what has just happened

“S-Sally, wait, it’s not that…grave…” your voice trailed off when you laid your eyes on her. She was frozen with her hands on your calf, her fingers over your wound but also tracing more or less old thin cuts you kept hidden from the outside world. Her chest was wavering like crazy. You never saw her breathing so fast, you didn’t need to see her face or hear her voice to know how many emotions were dwelling in her chest. And then even that stopped

the next second her arms were around you, on her knees, holding you in a hug so tight you let out a short breath

she smelt of old, of iron, of medicinal alcohol and of cold. But your arms wrapped themselves around her frail body, receiving the hug you didn’t know you needed so much

the two of you stood there for who knows how long before you pulled away, you smiled at her and thanked her, and, with a finger, she pointed like a nagging nurse she is, not to move until she comes back

you inhaled deeply and exhaled, smiling, Sally coming back with bandages and water within a second. you loved her, you knew you’re loved back, and that’s all that matters

The Hag / Lisa Sherwood

You had a long day of Trials and you didn’t want anything more than to see Lisa

Usually you were paying more attention while walking through the thick swamp, but you were too tired to care right now. That was until you got stuck in a branch, your favorite jacket ripped. Great!

You took it off and tried to free it without damaging the cloth more, when you heard noise in the nearby bushes

You knew who it was, and you were so glad to see Lisa that you forgot about your exposed arms, tiny, crowded lines poking underneath your short sleeved shirt

Lisa came to you, making a questioning sound. You expressed how happy you were to see her, and that your jacket was stuck. She used her overgrown hand to cut the branch, setting your jacket free. Such a hero

Hours passed by as you two talked and you recharged your batteries just being free in nature and spending time with your favorite woman. Lisa wasn’t too talkative nor the most attractive person, but she knew how to listen, she took care of you, taught you how to stitch and what herbs are used for healing and which are poisonous. She listened to you talking about your knowledge about flowers that you got from Claudette, she hissed when you told her Meg left you behind one time, and cheered for you when she heard that you escaped from The Trapper through the hatch

Time was to leave and you hugged your short girlfriend, but, before you left through the thick fog, she stopped you by pulling on your sleeve. You turned around, confused, she has never done that before

Lisa rose to her height and booped her head against your arm. You came to understand that she doesn’t have lips, that being the gesture she used for kissing, and right now she was kissing the exact spot you spent your nights staring at

Your eyes filled with tears, and she looked at you and touched your face with her good hand, shaking her head. No words needed, you nodded and tried to smile

She waved her big grin and made you chuckle, and you thanked her. Before you left, you turned around once again, surprised to see Lisa sending you a kiss through the air, something she did for the first time. You left The Swamp smiling your heart out

The Pig / Amanda Young

You had a bad episode when everything was too much, your fellow survivors too loud and too pushy. You just needed to let it all out, but you didn’t want to get into your old habits

You decided to pay a visit to your…friend, girlfriend. You never know with Amanda, the way she talks it’s cold and totally different than the way she looks at you, touches you, kisses you…

You really needed to get out of here

The Game was quiet and you assumed Amanda was in a trial, so you decided to wander around, to let your mind free. It was so unusual to see the rooms you knew so well from hiding, from running. But you never had the time to admire the details on the walls, every scratch that might know too much, to observe every trap laying around. You knew Amanda did nothing else than working on these things in her free time. Sometimes you were a bit jealous, as if she loved this blood thirsty technology more than you

Time passed and you got bored, tired, still angry and sad, still restless, and Amanda was nowhere to be found

You came by a room with red light and a lot of tools laying around. You stared for a while at the table under the bloody light, gritting your teeth. You didn’t want to pick the screwdriver. You didn’t want to sit down on the cold floor, your back rested on the table. You only wanted to see your pain, to attach a reason to everything that was making your chest so tight

“What the fuck are you doing”

You snapped back to reality, your sleeve rolled up and a screwdriver in your hand. Your breathing increased as you saw no one else but Amanda in front of you, her fists clenched. You opened your mouth to speak, but she grabbed the screwdriver from your hand and left

You felt your nose hurting, tears threatening your eyes. You thought you have failed her and you’re nothing but a burden

When you heard her footsteps, you quickly tried to explain yourself, but you were instead met with cold water

You spat the water and looked surprised at Amanda, who threw the bucket away and then her morbid mask. You never saw her without her mask, unless it was dark and the two of you had no clothes on

“Scream” she said, her eyes holding so much emotion. You were beyond lost

“What do-”

“Scream!” she interrupted coming in front of you and kneeling over your legs. You opened your mouth and let out a confused ‘aaa’

“Louder!” she pushed and you screamed, louder she asked again and you began to scream how loud you could, again and again, letting out all you were holding in your chest. You only stopped when your voice got hoarse, your breathing heavy and your eyes big. But most importantly, your chest light

“Don’t ever think of doing that shit again.” she said, taking hold of your wrists. “Just scream and leave everything that makes you angry.” She stopped for a second, not the best when it came to encouragements, but she wanted the best for you nonetheless. You were at a loss of words, not knowing if you wanted to cry or to hold her. Then you heard her saying

“You’re the best thing that happened to me since forever, I won’t fucking lose you, you hear me?!”

Her cheeks flushed up and her eyebrows furrowed, in such a funny expression that made you start chuckling. Oh, how you loved her and how thankful you were to have her

The Spirit / Rin Yamaoka

Yamaoka Estate was a breath of fresh air when not disturbed by generators and people being chased and running around. In her free time, Rin enjoyed renovating the old house with you, finding new memories, sharing laughter and sweet touches

You found pictures but most of them were too worn out to make out faces, but that didn’t stop you from joking “You seem taller now”

One day, as you were painting over a wall, you came across a mirror. You forgot how you looked like since you came into the Entity realm, and you found it a blessing. You were never like the other girls, your body wasn’t anything like your old friends’. Here, it didn’t matter, but here you are in front of a mirror looking at every unwanted curve. You slowly raised your sleeve, remembering every word inscribed on your skin, every night you didn’t sleep, because it felt too hard to

You held the brush so hard you knew it will soon break, while trying your best to hold back tears. You looked up in the mirror hating on your expression, on the tears filling your eyes, on everything. But out of nowhere Rin was behind you, holding your wrist

You seemed out of words, too ashamed to hide, too sad to even cry. You watched in the mirror as Rin changed her expression from concerned to questioning to sad. Her cool aura was covering you and her cold hand against your hot skin felt nice, calming your beating heart a bit

“It’s nothing…I’m…” you avoided looking at yourself in the mirror, but Rin, who was still behind you, raised your chin. She took the brush from your other hand and drew a heart on top of your head on the mirror. It made you smile. She continued, drawing all over your body as you looked at yourself in the dirty glass. She drew flower tattoos over your arms and scars, gave you a crown and jewelry, covered you in hearts, and wrote her name over your heart

The more you watched her drawing, the more you smiled, more and more until your cheeks were hurting

“God, thank you, Rin.” you turned your head to press a soft kiss on her cool cheek. She made a humming sound, pouting her lips before stealing a kiss on your lips and disappearing

You started laughing and called out loud for your ghostly girlfriend, and then you went in search for her, with a heart full of flowers

The Legion / Susie

Susie really wanted to present you to the Legion, you were her girlfriend and they were her family. For her it was normal. She wasn’t even wearing her mask, all for this special moment

“Are you sure? It..feels a bit weird, what if they won’t like me?” you asked nervously, being dragged after her.

“Nooo, don’t think that. They will love you! And even if they don’t, who cares, I love you” she looked over the shoulder to wave you a cheeky grin. You sighed and shook your head with a smile, she’s so stubborn

As you two walked around the Ormont, there was a bit of ice and Susie got all excited. “Do you know how to skate? Come, come, come!”

You didn’t even get to answer that you don’t know how, she pulled you on the ice never letting go of your hand. Your legs were like jelly beans while you were sliding around with her help, but Susie was laughing so much it just made you happy. You got some courage and tried to make a step, your worst decision since telling Ace you can beat him at card games

You fell, dragging Susie down with you, both of you sliding for a bit more before stopping, still laughing

“Oh god, I’m sorry, Su, I think it isn’t for- what?” you stopped when you saw Susie looking at you with a concern you have never seen on her face before. You followed her gaze to find your clothes all messed up, revealing your shoulder, old patterns of messy lines going from the shoulder towards the collarbone. You quickly covered it, your breathing rate increasing

“Susie, it’s fine, it’s nothing, I’m- I’m alright”

Oh god, Susie was crying, thick tears falling down her cheeks. You felt terrible and so guilty

“Susie, please-” you couldn’t continue as she threw herself over you, her arms tightly wrapped around your neck.

“Talk to me! When you feel like that, let’s talk, let’s find a tree to punch or let’s - let’s do something, I’ve never thought I’d find someone like you, and I’m sure my friends like you too! I’m so sad you can’t see yourself through my eyes. You’re beautiful and smart and cool and crazy and you like my clothes and my hair and I love the way you smile and how you talk and you give me courage to be myself and–”

She kept on rambling on everything she loves about you while you were slowly melting in her embrace, hiding your face in the crook of her neck. After a little while she calmed down and let go of you. Her eyes were red and puffy

You sighed tenderly. There were emotions you couldn’t express in words, instead, you pulled her into a kiss. Susie happily returned it. After the two of you broke away, she showed you her wide smile

“You can even join the Legion!”

Wait what

“I’ll find you a mask and the rest will accept you in, too!”

Susie no

The Legion / Julie

You were in the house in Osmond, the Legion scattered in different Trials. They all found you cool when Julie decided to invite you for a party when they found some old marshmallows

So you were just waiting around for them to come back. You found them much more entertaining than the survivors, especially Julie. You still couldn’t believe the killer that sometimes has to hunt you down is calling you her girlfriend so proudly

You found an old plate, so you thought why not heat some food for when your people will come back. They have a fridge and a microwave around that are, surprisingly, still working

But when you turned around, in front of the door was The Legion covered in blood with the chest raising in a deadly rhythm

“Holy shit!” you screamed and dropped the plate, breaking it into pieces. You heard the person chuckling and you knew it was Julie.

“Goddammit, Julie, you scared me.” you said and knelt to get the broken plate pieces, but you cut yourself.

“Sorry, babe, not my fault you’re wandering around. Lemme see that” she took your hands and, before you could say anything, she rolled up your sleeve to make sure the blood won’t touch it. Your entire face turned red and you felt your eyes wet when Julie was blatantly staring at the scars on your wrist. You dropped your eyes to the floor

“Hey, look at me.” she said and raised her mask. You looked at her through furrowed eyebrows, hiding your wrist away. Being surprised was an understatement when she showed you her wrists which were heavily scarred with old wounds

She didn’t say anything for a few moments, then, when you raised your eyes to lock them on hers, she turned a bit bashful, looking away

“We might have different reasons, but it doesn’t matter, alright? It matters that we’re stronger than that, and if I could stop doing it, so can you. You’re mine and no one can harm you, not even yourself. Got it? You’re not alone.”

You were surprised to see her so open, but you smiled and nodded, and then she looked straight at you. There were words she wanted to say, and you knew them, but her pale cheeks lit up and she just kissed your forehead, pulling back her mask over her face.

“Now go away before you cut your pretty fingers in this again. Or should I kiss the boo boo to go away?” she teased while throwing the broken pieces out the door.

“Fuck you, Julie” you laughed to which she responded “Love you too”, and you knew she really meant it

The Plague / Idiris

Visiting the priestess between the Trials was your favorite activity lately. She was a beautiful tall woman, so smart and caring. You still missed all the details of why she’s the way she is, or why she kills, and not understanding her ancient tongue didn’t help you too much

The thing you noticed first was that she never touched you with her infested hand, only with her good one, her claw like jewelry softly resting on your shoulder or sometimes brushing away your hair. And you loved it

You climbed down the stairs, happily thinking what English words you will teach her today. It was something about her so incredibly fascinating that you couldn’t put your finger on, but she also was a very sweet company and you were happy to help

You knocked twice and the stone door opened, revealing the inside of an exquisite room with old satin and gold that still shone

Idiris was there, standing in front of a tiny table. “Welcame” she greeted you and you smiled seeing her using the words you taught her.

“Welcome. It’s nice to see you” you made a short bow which made her smile. She signed for you to come to her, and there was a sweet smile on her half rotten face. She was hiding something. You walked to her and waited, so curious to see what she was hiding but respectful enough to wait. She turned to you, talking in her own tongue, such an old language that didn’t sound like anything you heard in your old world. When she finished, she smiled as she presented you a beautiful dress that looked like it was made of gold. It was like nothing you have seen before, it looked like the liquid gold was made into a dress just for you. Your mouth was open and you looked at her with so much enthusiasm that it simply made her proud

There was only one problem, the dress was sleeveless. It was obvious she wanted you to wear it and you couldn’t possibly refuse. You smiled, took the dress and went in the other room. The dress felt divine against your skin and you felt like a goddess yourself, but your marked wrists and arms made sure to remind you of your human nature. You kept your jacket on and went to Idiris

“Tada~” you shyly got out of the room. When she saw you, she smiled, but then she furrowed her half pretty face. She shook her head and came to you with the intention of taking off your jacket, and you were too ashamed to refuse. You smiled nervously while being undressed, keeping your arms behind your back afterwards, but she still wasn’t happy. She held out a hand, to take yours. You stared at her frightened, you never showed your scars to anyone before, but you were too afraid to refuse Idiris. Her cold ice eyes were piercing through you as you kept making her wait

You finally gave her your hand. She was quick to observe the crowded scars all over your wrists, some going up to your arm. Your cheeks blushed and you felt terribly uncomfortable as she inspected them, softly touching them with the back of her fingers. You noticed the way her gaze softened, and what she did next shocked you: the high priestess guided your hand to her mouth, pressing a soft kiss to your scarred wrist

You watched her leave for a moment, as you were left in a state of shock, not able to move. What has just happened

When she came back, she was holding some candles that smelt of vanilla and something that looked like tea. She put a cloth into the liquid and then asked for your hands once again. You didn’t say anything while she was taking care of your arms, humming something close to a prayer. In fact, everything was so unreal, you didn’t even believe it was actually happening

“Good.” you heard her strong voice say. She was pointing her finger at your forehead. Then, she slowly moved the finger to your wrists. “Bad.” not only that she learned the words so fast, she even understood the meaning only from your weird signing

You never smiled more than you did now, and she returned it just as warmly.