#iavmmcm

[latte-cucumber]

haaaii i saw u said u had headcanons on why walter was not in muppets 2015 and . i wanna see PLS!!!!!!! ☀️

hi ok so this one's gonna be a DOOZY. it's less of a hc and more of a "this is an explanation that is absoLutely not how it happened in reality but i am an insane wooter shipper so i have declared it truth." i also may or may not write it into a full-on fic in the future sometime. this is Probably longer than you expected nor wanted i'm Sorry but i have Thoughts on this

and it's also less "why walter wasn't in muppets 2015" and more "the muppets were all together, doing muppety stuff, not one year prior in muppets most wanted. and then one year later they're starting a talk show out of nowhere! rowlf's working a bar!!!! What Happened?"

so this will really only make sense if you've read my fic i don't wanna miss this kiss (at least up to ch 2). i'll put in a quick summary if you haven't read it/don't want to (spoilers ahead) plus this one's Definitely gonna need a readmore so here's as good a place as any

ok so the gist of don't wanna miss: after muppets most wanted, walter gets depressed that he didn’t recognize that kermit was replaced by constantine. yes he saved him, but it was far too late, and kermit had to live in a Gulag for weeks maybe months. and he was the one who pushed kermit into agreeing for the trip, so really it's all his fault that kermit got replaced in the first place!!

and Then. he wishes he was never born

daniel arrives to transport him to a world where he was never born, he's back in LA, everyone's back in the places where they were before muppets 2011. he talks to kermit, has a good old therapy sesh, and then he goes to club dot

see, tex richman Did take the theatre after the end of muppets 2011 in the alternate timeline, but rachel bitterman iavmmcm bought him out for contrived reasons. and scooter, for even more contrived reasons (because i firmly believe the plot of mmw happens less than 3 months after the events of 2011) decides to quit google and work as a cage dancer there. this Did all start as a cage dancer scooter thirst fic ngl

and then in don't wanna miss, walter sees scooter and has Several revelations about their relationship. and scooter gives him Another therapy sesh, coupled with a lot of flirting and several kisses, and then walter decides to go back to his world.

but the thing is. what if he didn't?

so now we get back to the theory. my theory, which may or may not turn into a fic, is that walter decided to stay in the world where he was never born. daniel's waiting for him outside the club, ready for him to say "i'm ready to go back" and then he can take him back to his world and everything will be fine and dandy.

but he doesn't. he comes back, dragging scooter along behind him, and says, "i'm not coming." he's happy with scooter here, they love each other, and they're never gonna separate, not once in a million years.

daniel's like "but--but you gotta! i, uh, i have it on good authority that scooter back home likes you too" but walter's like "no thanks" because come on. if you've snagged cage dancer scooter, who the heck would want to go back to regular old gofer scooter (me. i would. also walter probably but shhh)

daniel's like "you gotta come back. there will be Consequences" but walter is Adamant. he is Not Coming Back he is staying here

so daniel, horrified with what he's done, comes back to the regular timeline and watches the muppet theatre crumble before his very eyes. without walter around to save it, it turns into a withered husk of the building (and/or club dot i haven't decided yet). the muppets are gone. no more. finis

and he goes up to heaven and asks boss what he can do and She says "you gotta start up the muppets again"

"but--but i Can't! i just destroyed them! they're better off without me"

"well, you got your work cut out for you, kid. but you gotta get them back together"

so he thinks for a while, then finally goes up to kermit's mansion. kermit is Shocked to see him, like it's been 20 years and he just Appears out of Nowhere. daniel apologizes (even though kermit doesn't know what he's apologizing for) and then he says "so. how do you feel about starting up a late night show?"

and this has been a Very long trip from the original question But. this is my theory on a) why muppets 2015 exists b) why they're in an office instead of the theatre and c) why walter isn't in it. answer to all of the above: because he's busy kissing cage dancer scooter in the world where he was never born. i have some More thoughts on how he returns to this world, but i will save that for another post. hope you enjoyed this far too long deep dive into my head :)

[timona-lisa]

say what you will about the media christmasing too early but i do look forward to rewatching all the muppet christmas specials because there are so many sweet kermiggy moments and they just seem to connect/understand each other better during the holidays

even the hot mess that is iavmmcm has its moments

not to mention, kermit and piggy being adorable parents in mcc

[timona-lisa]

the only reason i don’t hate iavmmcm is the second half of the story and the way it handled kermit and piggy’s relationship

i don’t remember much about how it was portrayed in mwoo because i was too busy yelling at the screen and i saw that thing twice, man, TWICE

i don’t think i could handle a third time

[timona-lisa]

call me a starry-eyed fangirl but i can’t sing enough praises about the 2011 movie. i remember some people complained that the plot was too similar to iavmmcm but let’s be honest, who remembers that movie outside the fandom? moreover, who wants to remember that movie? (okay, it’s not as heinous as mwoo but still) 

some people also complained about too much jason segel and amy adams but you know what? they were legit likable characters (amy adams is ridiculously adorable) and i’ll take them over rob schneider and carson daly any day. i had no problem spending time with them and getting invested in their story, same with walter. 

i know it sounds biased but i often find myself comparing the new material to the 2011 movie. it lifted the bar so high after more than a decade of ‘eh, that was okay’ to ‘OMG MAKE IT STOP.’ 

i’ll never forget the feeling of being at the theater with my mom and sister, surrounded by mostly adults as well as a few families, and how everybody cracked up at various scenes (rowlf’s ‘classic’ line got a huge laugh) and how they applauded at the end. 

if i could relive it all over again, man, i would. that’s how much i love that movie.