#i've tried posting it here before and got nervous and deleted so who knows how it'll turn out

[mariyekos]

Fic time. Chapter 1 of many. In the middle of revising so I don't want to post on AO3 yet (that and I'm uh. Still debating on whether I want to post this on AO3 at all or keep it to myself) but for followers who like DMC if you want a preview here it is. This is supposed to be an adaptation of a response I had to a prompt way back in February of this year! (oh man I've been working on this for 6 months). Also if this sounds familiar I've posted the first 3k before, but this time there's more like 7k words. I cut out about 1400 words today so it used to be longer too 😅

Summary of the whole fic will probably be:

"After defeating Mundus, Dante finds himself stuck in Hell. While looking for a way home, he finds something- or someone- unexpected and proceeds to make several bad decisions. (A DMC1/DMC5 fusion)".

Chapter 1

Mundus is dead. 

Or as close to it as he can be, at any rate. For a being as old and powerful as Mundus, millennia of conquest and victory and tribute fueling his lifeforce and abilities beyond what he’d have accumulated by simply living that long or inheriting strength from his forebears, can’t really be killed by something as simple as what Dante did to him. Not when it boiled down to ‘hit hard and fast with all that you can’ and not much more. All that could do- all that will do, has done, however you’d want to phrase it when the deed’s been done but the effect’s still going- is delay him for a while. Force him to take a nice long nap while he gathers back his power. A reprieve for Dante but not a panacea for the world in general. 

Sure, Dante packs a punch, especially when down in the demon world and fueled by the sword bearing his father’s name and legacy, itself fueled by the sword and amulet that for two thousand years sealed and separated two once-joined worlds, but in the end he was just brute forcing it, and that wouldn’t cut it when it came to something as strong and storied as Mundus. That’d be too easy.

To truly kill Mundus, he’d need something a lot more complex. Elaborate. Drowning in preparation and ritual and kind of magic that could seal Mundus to the point of erasure. And though Dante knows a handful of helpful spells and has made up a few wards here and there, he’s far from an expert on the stuff; more a dabbler than a practitioner, if he had to put a name to it. So if he really wants to blast Mundus from this plane of existence, he’ll either need to come back in a few years once he’s learned some new tricks, or convince someone who already knows them to take a dive into the other side for a quick kingkilling trip. That or send his more-magically inclined son to clean up his messes once he’s ready, if said son ever ends up existing. Who’s to say? That’ll all depend on whether Dante ever manages to escape his current predicament. 

That predicament being the fact that he’s very much stuck in Hell with no way home. ‘Least, not as far as he can tell. That’s why goal number one right now is to find some portal that’ll pop him back where he needs to be before he loses it. 

Which is. Well. Something! Dante’s trying to be an optimist about it right now but he’s not going to lie and say he’s very happy about it. Interesting as Hell can be, he chose the human world for a reason. Hell- the Underworld, the Demon World, whatever you want to call it- it just doesn’t have the same appeal.

It’s Mundus’ fault anyway. Maybe if Dante had killed him it would’ve reversed whatever spell Mundus had used to drag him here and sent him right home, but he didn’t and now Mundus is gone so he’s going to have to figure this out all on his own unless Mundus comes back with a quirky ‘surprise! And goodbye!’ real soon, which, given Dante did beat him about three inches from oblivion, is very much not going to happen. 

Back to Mundus and his semi-unkillability, the reason why killing Mundus is such a tricky endeavor is that he’s more than just your average demon. He’s King of the Fire Hell, for one. Important guy right off the bat. Strong. Impressive. Titled and storied, ranked and elevated, high brow and high class and all that jazz. He’s also Demon Emperor to top it off, whatever that means, which makes him the highest ranked demon Dante’s ever heard of, not to mention faced, and that comes with its own perks of bonus survival.

(It should perhaps be noted that that does, technically, leave room for higher high ranked and higher strength demons Dante hasn’t heard of to exist, by virtue of them either not attacking the human world in recent times and thus staying out of his path, or by them being a whole lot more subtle than the guy who burned down his house, murdered his mother, kidnapped slash brainwashed his brother, and sent a demonic clone of his mom to lure him in after years of sending his lackeys to ruin his life before that, but that’s a different topic for another time. If Dante has to deal with anyone else like that before he’s able to get home, sit down, maybe cry a bit, and take a nap, he thinks he might spontaneously explode). 

Mundus is a capital-E Entity, a legacy, not exactly cosmic but definitely beyond the rest of the rabble Dante’s faced over the years, and even though he knows Mundus could still be beaten into hibernation by someone without all the fancy know-how to permanently off him- Dante just did it, after all- it wouldn’t and didn’t really kill him. Not in a way that would stick. Not in the way that would truly, fully, permanently eliminate him from existence. 

See, if demons are the Underworld’s equivalent of men, then Mundus is the equivalent of a god, and gods don’t simply dissipate when there are still hordes of believers left to will them back into existence with their body (and souls) as fuel. So the texts Dante’s found say. Or so he’s translated them. Linguistics isn’t his strong suit.

(That had always been-)

But if any two demons were to be considered gods of the true sort, those two would be Mundus and Sparda, and Sparda is gone, gone, lost to the winds, deader than dead, never to return- at least as far as Dante can tell given the guy disappeared and never came back with milk or cigarettes or ancient artifacts or even his just his body and soul, and Mundus seemed to think so too, because he kept gloating about that during their fight and the various demons Dante has met over the years never stopped yapping about how the traitor which spawned him had died and left behind a disappointment in his place- so if Sparda can die, Mundus can probably die too.

Dante just doesn’t know how to cause that. 

Yet.

Maybe one day he’ll unravel the mystery behind all that and use his newfound knowledge to stick it to the bastard who came into his life swinging and lit the candles on a birthday cake that would consume the rest of his life in its flames. Maybe he’ll lay out all the pieces that make up god-killing for dummies and have a little scene when he realizes it’s way more complicated than anything’s he’s done and requires a way larger skillset than he has at his disposal, meaning it’ll probably be beyond him no matter how hard he tries to prepare. Maybe he’ll discover the secret to killing a demon-god is actually stupidly easy- if obscure- and just stand there dumbfounded by the fact that his father apparently died from something so basic after two thousand years of romping around a world that he’d split himself. Maybe he’ll discover it was some sort of freak occurrence that had never happened before and would never happen again- unless either Dante got insanely lucky or Mundus got insanely unlucky, which knowing Dante’s luck will never, ever happen- and decide to go back to cleaning up his father’s messes in other ways because there’s nothing he can do about it and that’s what he’s been doing for the past ten plus years depending on how you look at it, so why not? Revenge done, Mundus (not) killed, it’s time for cleanup duty and to carry a cross he never asked to bear but has never been able to bring himself to set down. If it ain’t broke don’t fix it. Being miserable does not count as being broken. It’s just unfortunate. 

Basically when it comes to taking what happened to Sparda and applying that to Mundus, Dante has absolutely no idea where to begin. To do that he’d need to know at least something, and the closest he’d ever gotten to unraveling the mysteries of his father’s death and Mundus’ slaughter had been a day or so before when a scantily-clad version of his mom showed up on his now in-pieces doorstep spilling out the sob story that was his past and inviting him to the place where she said he could explore it and earn his revenge. 

Getting revenge? Sort of happened. He fought Mundus, even if he didn't exactly kill him, and that’s way more than Dante’s managed to do in the past twenty years. And he certainly did do the whole exploring thing. A lot. Probably more than he had in nine years. 

(Since the-) 

Mallet Island had been a hassle at the best of times and a maze at the worst. Had Mundus been the one to plan out all those keys and thingamabobs needed to open up all those doors? Or had he found a random castle with a conveniently obtuse set of navigational tools and thought ‘Ah, yes, this is the perfect place to torment the son of my greatest enemy by making him not only fight his way through my army but exhaust himself trying to figure out how in the world he’s supposed to get through the lion door in the courtyard that speaks in tongues from a statue beneath alongside the other fifteen weird entry things this castle for some reason has’? If this were any other situation, Dante might’ve had a good time going through those puzzles. They were clever. Dante’ll admit that much. But when you’re trying to fight and kill the guy who ruined your life? Clever puzzles just turn into annoying obstacles, if he’s putting it nicely. 

What was the point of all that anyway? Did Mundus think it would be funny to watch Dante struggle? Did he want some entertainment before the actual show? Some fun advertisements to tide him over before the movie began? Or was there some sort of judgment or valuation thing going on? Did he decide Dante needed to go through a special trial before he was worthy of bowing before him? Was Dante’s ability to put a trident in a stone and a sword in a statue some sort of measure of his worth? 

Maybe if Mundus wakes back up in Dante’s lifetime he can get the answer to some of these questions. Maybe he should’ve just asked Trish during one of the handful of times they saw each other between their arrival and her- betrayal. 

(Death. Sacrifice. Why do the women who wear his mother’s face seem to think he wants them to die for his sake-) 

But he didn’t. He’d just gawked and marched on.

Now Mundus is as good as dead, Trish is dead and on another plane, and Dante’s alone with no one to ask anything of. So there’s not much he can do besides wander.

That all wraps back around to his current predicament. The whole “stuck in Hell with no way home” thing.

See, right now he’s cruising through the Demon World mowing down any and all demons that are so unfortunate as to cross his path, because whatever fancy magic Mundus had used to send them to Hell apparently didn’t have an automatic reverse button, so with Mundus down Dante’d lost his world-crossing express ticket, and now he’s stuck in the world he doesn’t want to stay in with no idea how to make it back. 

It’s not all bad. Flying’s pretty nice. Fighting too. It’s been ages since he last has so many good fights in a row.

Fighting and flying also feel like his only options at the moment, which does definitely put a damper on how good they sort of are since it’s that or leaning back on his well-practiced habit of sitting in misery, but he’ll just say he’s having a (not) good time to give himself a moment of reprieve in this otherwise crummy situation. 

The high of killing Mundus had clearly done something to his brain and body that put them on full go-mode, because right now he just knows that if he doesn’t blow through as much energy as he possibly can in the next however-long period of time it takes to blow through it, he will either Actually Explode or go full on Demon-Mode in a way he’s terrified he won’t be able to come back from. So fly and blast away it is. At least until the feeling dies down and he’s certain taking a break will not lead to the Death of Dante in the most pathetic way possible besides just lying down to starve or something equally unpleasant and unepic.

Man. Could the scenery at least change? Dante’s been zooming through Hell for what’s gotta be at least five hours at this point and for all he knows he’s been going in circles because everything still looks indistinguishable from the place he started out, all lava plumes and giant rocks and the occasional craggy pit. It would be nice to know he’s at least going somewhere, even if he doesn’t come across a portal right away. At least that way he’d be able to say he was theoretically making progress.

If he had to describe how he’s doing, Dante would say he’s having both a wonderful and terrible time. He feels better than he’s ever felt. He feels…not the worst he’s ever felt, because nothing compares to the fire or the Temen-ni-gru, and the whole Mallet thing hasn’t hit him fully yet because he shoved everything that happened during this big yet-to-end trip to the back of his mind to keep from having some sort of mental breakdown that would be really inconvenient for his get-home-plan, but he feels awful too and it’s just too much to process so he’s just going to say he feels A Lot. 

In the Underworld, Dante feels stronger than he ever has despite the exhaustion that by all rights should be forcing its claws into him, sliding in under his skin and pulsing its grip to either tear him limb from limb or at least gore him a bit as it drags him down and pushes him under the lovely pinkish water of Hell and gift him with the lovely burning sensation that comes with taking a dip. He’s never maintained his Devil Trigger this long, never pushed himself this hard this long, never kept fighting and flying- and it’s the flying thing that’s the most out of place, probably, because yeah he’s fought for really long times before even if not while expending so much energy and putting as much effort in as he is now, but when it comes to flying he usually prefers to stick to the ground or maybe glide for a few minutes but not stretches that are probably in the hours- this long. This kind of effort and expenditure should come with the sort of exhaustion that would have him collapsing onto the couch instead of walking the few extra steps to his desk and the comfy chair there. If he was on a normal mission, it’d be the sort of thing that would have long since sent him stumbling for the nearest Divinity Statue desperate for a Vital Star of whatever size he could get his hands on.

But it hasn’t. Dante’s still got a star in his pocket, untouched and undesired, and he feels like he’s on top of the world. Exhilarated. Delirious. All-powerful. High. 

Was it killing Mundus that did this to him? Did Dante absorb some sort of special demon energy from him when the Demon Emperor not-died? It’s been ages since the last time he’d done something like that- not since the Geryon and his evil clone back in the Temen-ni-gru whose powers he hasn’t used in an age because they don’t really make battles any more fun- and he can’t remember exactly how that felt or if that feeling was the same as the feeling he’s feeling now. He doesn’t think it was. What he’s feeling now is unique.

(What he’s feeling now is like the battle high he’d felt the last time he was in Hell turned up to ten, back when he’d fought-)

It could also just be because he’s in Hell. Maybe Dante’s demon side is latching onto whatever sort of ambient energy exists in the Demon World and is having a field day with it while the human side of his brain just doesn’t know how to process it all. One side high, one side confused. Dante the single man left with mind a whirl. 

It reminds him of when he’s stocked to nearly bursting with red orbs, having killed so many demons in so short a time that it feels like his body’s filled to the brim with so much energy that if he doesn’t either slow down for a bit or get to a Divinity Statue to spend them, he’ll have to Trigger and toss some fancy moves around just to burn through enough to gather all the rest. That’s the sort of feeling that will send him rushing down passageways high and careless, ready for slaughter and bouncing off the walls to look as cool as possible while doing it. 

If by some chance any of that sounds somehow pleasant, it’s really not. 

Not emotionally. Not before he’s started or after he’s done. It’s that sort of indulgence that feels so good in the moment but so bad at every point when you’re not experiencing it, and one that Dante both longs for and loathes. 

It’s the longing that makes his distaste cross to disdain. Annoyance to hatred. 

(Though not enough to keep him from ever shooting for it when he realizes just how close he is. For as much as he likes to say he hates the high in the before and after, he loves it in the during, is addicted to the feeling in a way where the temptation’s easy to ignore until the bottle’s right in front of you and there’s no one to yell at you to put it down, and the hatred that follows is a more a mix of disgust at his indulgence and inhumanity and a longing for the feeling of power and fulfillment and rightness to flow through him once more).

When Dante loses himself like that, when the high of battle crosses over him and the flair he puts into every fight he’s ever in goes from something meant to make a battle as fun as possible while he’s stuck putting something down to something where he’s toying with enemies who would probably be begging for mercy were they intelligent enough to ask for it- and with some of the big ones, sometimes they do beg for mercy, promising to stop attacking or to leave him alone forever or even to bow down in subservience if he’ll only let them live and not either smite them on the spot or entrap them in weapons he’ll sell the next time he runs out of cash- in those moment, or after those moments are over, Dante’s left feeling inhuman. Like his demon side has won. Like the side of himself he wishes didn’t exist had taken over without his permission and caused him to do things that don’t actually sicken him nearly as much as he feels they should. 

That’s a problem he faces a lot more than he’d like to admit.

Feeling like he should feel one way or another, but not actually feeling that way or the other. Moments where he arrives at a mission to find the contorted remains of the five hunters who failed before him and thinks ‘huh, I should probably be horrified right now’ but only feels mildly disgusted by the sight and smell. Moments where he hears a demon’s nest has been cleared out before he can get to it and thinks ‘aw, but I wanted to be the one to do it’ instead of being happy that said nest was destroyed before any more people could be hurt. Moments where he realizes he should feel bad, and does feel bad, but only because he’s feeling bad about not feeling bad, in a twisted sense of the word.

Basically, Dante is a very messed up person trying his best to be human but occasionally failing terribly and that realization does not make him a happy man. 

He doesn’t want to be a demon. As fun as it can be when he indulges, he spends way, way more of his time not wanting those things and not being happy about that kind of stuff, and the joy of indulging does not outweigh his disgust at that joy. When Dante chose the human world, that was not a temporary choice. He didn’t do it just to sound good. It’s a promise he made and one he plans to uphold until the day he dies. It’s the person he wants to be. It’s the feelings he wants to have.

It’s just a matter of how much choice he really has in the end when those demon instincts sometimes have such a more powerful hold than the human ones.

(Supposedly, he’s fifty-fifty. Logically, each side should have equal claim over him.

But based on the beings he’s encountered, demon instincts run a lot stronger than human ones, and sometimes he feels like even with the fifty fifty split it’s more a seventy thirty or eighty twenty when it comes to urges that the demon side of him loves and the human side stares at in horror.)

Back in the present and his merry jaunt through Hell, he finally gets a change in pace when a pack of Blade descends upon him and gives him a chance to burn through at least a little bit of his battle high. 

It’s not that much of a battle. For all they’ve given him trouble in the past, he rips them to shreds before they can lay a finger on him. 

His claws dig into the tail of the first to reach him as he snatches it out of the air, launching the beast at its brethren with enough force to both tear its spine from its body and fling said body not just into but through the Blades trying to get the jump on him from the side. The move practically douses him in various liquids that Dante does not want to think about; blood is blood and if he had any sort of significant (well, actually, he does have a pretty significant reaction to it, but it’s one that’s good-bad and one he can tamp down because he doesn’t want to be that person) slash visceral reaction to that he wouldn’t have survived a day in his current profession, but he thinks there might be spinal fluid too and for some reason the prospect of getting that in his mouth is absolutely disgusting, so he scrunches up his face as he tricks away. Not that that gives him a reprieve. A lot of demons don’t have particularly strong self-preservation instincts, so what Blades remain launch themselves past the bloody remains of their fellows to get an attack in on the thing that decimated their brethren and Dante deals with them much as he had the first. One by one, or sometimes in twos or threes when they’re feeling annoying, the pack descends. And one by one, or sometimes in twos or threes if Dante aims just right, the Blades fall and die.

Something about Hell makes their energy disperse in an odd way. It’s like an express delivery right to Dante’s heart, a rush of power bursting forth as their corpses burst into a million tiny specks that fade into the non-existent wind an hour or minute later. Really the stagnancy of the air is one of the things about Hell that puts Dante most on edge. It’s unnatural. Unreal. Dead.

(There’s a part of him that urges him to shove his own power into the corpses long enough to keep them solid; to break apart their ribs instead of just their spines, shoving Ifrit-clad fingers into their chests to part the bone and expose entrails rich in whatever it is demons feed on down here, before popping them out with a little fiery flare like they’re nice breakfast sausages ripe for the taking.

Dante not-so-politely yells at that part of himself to shut up.

He’s half-demon, but he’s not a monster. He’s not a cannibal.

Because while he’s half-human and it’s the human side he wants to indulge, he’s still half-demon, so eating a demon would basically be cannibalism and that’s a line he has no interest in crossing.

Not yet at least.

Hopefully not ever.)

The high lasts through the Blades, as it’s lasted through each and every fight Dante's thrown himself into since Mundus had gone down and Dante had been left wanting. Again, he wonders whether this is from Mundus or just Hell itself, and if it is from Mundus, if there’s an actual physical component or gain he got from the killing or if it’s all just in his head. Killing-  felling, defeating, whatever-the-hell it was, Dante was just gonna say killing from now on because he liked simple things- the guy who killed your mother, almost killed your brother, then tortured your brother, and brainwashed your brother, and enslaved your brother- (but not killed! Because no, twisted wretched bastard as he was, Mundus hadn’t been the monster who had killed Vergil. That had been Dante. His own damn twin-)

Well whatever it was that he’d done to Mundus, Dante feels half like he’s on top of the world and half like he’s going to burst into a million tiny pieces if he doesn’t rip everything in sight into a million tiny pieces first, and he wonders if maybe it is all just from satisfaction at achieving at least some degree of revenge. If that’s the case, he’s in for one hell of a crash when the mental high finally wears off and Dante’s subjected to whatever kind of terrible backlash-exhaustion he’ll face once his body finally finishes processing all he’s forced it through and lets him know just how badly he’d overextended himself.

Dante continues forward. He doesn’t really know where he’s going. Just forward. Maybe if he goes far enough he’ll run into a portal and make his way home. Maybe he won’t and he’ll be stuck in Hell forever. 

The latest in the series of bottomless, fiery canyons Dante’s passed eventually gives way to a fiercely boiling lava lake- or some sort of large body of not-water, Dante can’t see the end so maybe it’s an ocean, he doesn’t know, doesn’t think he can figure it out with the way his brain is still buzzing and body is still humming with an excess of power he can’t figure out what to do with- and in the center of the lake is something that throw Dante off nearly enough to make him nose dive because oh. Oh boy. Finally, finally there’s something that’s not only different, but looks promising.

For in the middle of the lava lake stands a castle. 

A grey-stone, big towers, fancy crenellation, a few bretèches, honest-to-the-potentially-nonexistent-god castle.

It’s the first sign of civilization he’s seen since he landed in Hell. The first one recognizable to his human-raised brain, at any rate. It’s reminiscent of the one on Mallet Island. 

(Does this mean Mundus did have his people built Mallet? That this was a long con? Or did he instead choose it because it reminded him of the architecture back home?)

The castle reeks of Mundus, even from miles away, and Dante’s certain it’s a prominent part of Mundus’ domain. Maybe even a summer home or something. He’s not there right now- again, Dante can just tell, his demonic senses are even stronger down in Hell to no one’s surprise- but it’s chock full of demons and Dante’s going to hope that means there’s something worth protecting inside.

There are a few enticing things about the castle, which run through his mind as he speeds through the skies:

First, that maybe a place as human-looking as a castle might have something as human-adjacent as real food. 

The hunger he’s facing right now isn’t that bad yet, but the ‘yet’ is carrying a lot of weight, and he doesn’t want to get to a point where he ends up doing something he’ll regret. Even demons need to eat, and Dante’s seen enough invasions that involved a kitchen raid to know they don’t only subsist on the flesh of their brethren. Hopefully Mundus and co. have tastebuds Dante can appreciate and the guards haven’t cleaned out the pantry in their master’s absence. 

Second, that castles usually have bedrooms, and if there’s a bedroom, there will probably be a bed, and maybe being in a bed in a real room will allow Dante to relax enough to get some sleep. 

Sleep would be more than welcome. He’s not about to drop or anything. He could keep going for days, maybe even weeks if he conserved his energy. Hell’s powering him in a way the ambient Human World never has. But despite having been born a half-breed, the two halves that make up Dante’s whole haven’t always worked very well with each other, and right now Dante’s human side feels like it’s seriously lagging despite the overwhelming energy keeping his demon half raring to go. And again, his human side is his favorite, so it’s the side he wants to pamper, and also the side he does not want to lose if it comes down to it. Who knows what might happen if the human side of his brain undergoes the whole saying about how if you don’t choose a time for your body to rest, it’ll choose a time for you? What will his demon side do? Will it still feel like Dante doing it? Will he do a bunch of terrible stuff while thinking he’s being perfectly reasonable, until the human side of him wakes up and he gets slammed by guilt and horror once it processes everything he’s done? Will he black out entirely while doing whatever demon stuff his demon side wants to do, like it’s an actual split personality instead of just a voice that he thinks is probably slightly more vocal than most people’s impulsive thoughts but has never really considered a separate consciousness (since he’s never given it an opportunity to prove it’s nothing more)? Will he flip some sort of switch so Demon Dante is the Dominant Dante and will remain that way until he encounters some sort of soul-sucking orb or annoying demon-sealing sigil again that quiets it down enough to let Human Dante rise back up and go ‘What have I done?’

After that train of thought derailed off a cliff and took all of its passengers with it Dante’s not really sure what his original third thought was, but the quick replacement is that maybe the castle will be occupied by demons that will put up enough of a fight to sate his own demon side, burn off some of the energy that has left Dante feeling like he’s stuck in someone else’s skin, and let him calm down enough to come up with a better plan for escaping Hell. He’s tired of the Wrongness in the air and what it does to him.

(He’s scared by how the Wrongness feels Right.)

The castle is guarded by some sort of giant serpent that Dante can’t help but compare to Cerberus despite the utter lack of visual similarities. The thing doesn’t even use ice. Or speak. Really it’s only similar in that it’s a guard and that it seems to be sneering at him when he tries to rile it up. The fire it uses is the opposite of the old pup. It’s a lot more level headed too.

(Really he’s only making the comparison because he’s spent the last several hours trying so hard not to think about something that that something is trying to worm itself into every other thing he does spend more than five seconds considering.) 

The serpent rears its head at Dante’s approach, launching itself from the point where the castle’s bridge would be were it to have been lowered. As it is the castle is sealed tight, so the bridge and the serpent are Dante’s best bet of getting into it and he isn’t going to pass up the grace of convenience. Its tail makes some good swings for him, and the fire breath does make Dante all toasty warm, but the thing never does manage to squeeze him tight enough to make him pop, and though the acid-like venom that shoots out from its mouth when it dives for him with teeth bared and mouth letting out an earsplitting screech does manage to sear an unfortunate hole into his coat, it ultimately misses skin. He’s had more than enough practice dodging projectiles to keep out of the thing’s way. So many flying scythes. So many globs of bug juice. Acid spit’s just another thing to add to the list.

The fight gets his heart rate up even if it doesn’t draw any blood, and Dante would say it was a nice little reprieve from the monotony of his latest jaunt. When the thing dies from one last shot to the head Dante thanks it for the entertainment. He feels a little less jumpy now that he’s gotten a more significant chunk of his energy out. Wonderful. He’s finally making progress. Points to the castle even if its only redeeming quality is the gate guard and the inside’s a complete bust.

The bridge falls open once the serpent is dead. Convenient. The dirt it sends into Dante’s eyes is annoying, but it’s worth not having to circle the castle for ages looking for a suitable entrance so in he goes.

Unsurprisingly, Dante’s jumped about five steps into the castle walls. Though the minions prowling the halls are child’s play in comparison to the serpent guardian, what they lack in strength they make up for in numbers, and while it’s not too bad when Dante’s in a large room, the wealth of corridors make things a little more tricky which is in this case more an annoyance than a pleasant source of entertainment.

It reminds him of Mallet, just without the puzzles. Thank god for that. He doesn’t have the brainpower for puzzles right now. If he has to face one he thinks he’ll just turn around and walk the other way.

Violence though? Violence is laced through his blood, entwined with his essence in a way it can never be torn from. Just because people like to say that violence is the thing of beasts, that doesn’t mean humans can’t be violent and can’t enjoy it too; the word depravity wouldn’t exist if humans weren’t around to do deprave things, violence and maiming and killing and tearing among those things which are frowned upon yet still extant and unfortunately common, so that’s a part of him that has support from both sides and clings to him like sap to a tree.

He blasts through hall after hall, the static flowing through him letting him know that he won’t be able to rest until each and every potentially-interesting but highly-doubtfully-challenging demon still alive in the castle is dead and gone. It’s died down somewhat in his most recent bout of pistol fire and evisceration-by-sword, the multitude of red orbs that do neat little dances to hop toward him whether he goes for them or not actually seeming to quiet the burning need in him for once rather than just charging him even further. He’s not sure of the mechanics of that. Maybe it’s some sort of overflow situation; once you get so high, you go back to zero. He’d be cool with that if it means he can rest. And hey, Mallet had some annoying orb doors that could only be broken if you had the cash, so maybe his new stockpile of orb-energy will prove useful making progress in the castle if he’s barred by a glowing door with a phantom hand that demands payment for progression. Maybe that’s what’ll get him back home.

He continues onwards.

And onward.

And onward.

Hot damn this castle is huge.

He goes through the castle level by level, clearing out the entire ground floor before ascending to the next, then the next, then any towers or protrusions as he encounters them, et cetera. His exploration hasn’t revealed an end to the flow of lesser demons committing suicide-by-Dante, but it has revealed a few somewhat useful looking bedrooms, so he files those away in the back of his mind to use later. The beds look cozy enough to stay in if his searching doesn’t reveal any magic portals. 

Other fun rooms include a giant hall for dining with a gargantuan throne at its head, an armory, a completely foodless kitchen (boo), a room full of enchanted chests and barriers that he leaves be after they don’t shatter with a few hits from Rebellion- and oh, he has Rebellion, when did that happen? Did it sense he needed it after gifting the Sparda and thus Force Edge to Trish and somehow make its way back to its wielder? He has no idea when he swapped to it from Alastor, just that it’s in his hands- and a trophy room full of things Dante doesn’t want to think about.

From the looks of things, he’d say this castle was very recently in use. The demons populating it seem more like guards than fellow looters, though Dante can’t help but feel like they’re missing a few big guys who’d be better at beating back actually competent intruders.

He’s not sure whether he’s happy or disappointed about that.

Still he moves forward, ascending and clearing room after room until he finds himself doing a little loop up the staircase of the last tower left to check, muttering under his breath about how there better be something actually useful in the room because while a bed would be nice the castle has been an overall disappointment and he really, really would like to get home.

The tower is immediately unsettling. It doesn’t look notably different from any of the others, but it instead feels completely and utterly muffled. As in, from the outside, Dante hadn’t felt anything from it at all. No guards. No inhabitants. Nothing. And going up the tower, Dante can hardly feel his own power either. It’s like the whole tower has been enchanted to suppress whatever’s stored within it. It doesn’t siphon his energy, but it feels like it might be setting him up for that to be done by another power. Dante doesn’t like it one bit.

If you’d mentioned the suppression concept to Dante ten minutes ago- or ten hours ago, probably, he’s not sure how long he’s been in Hell because whatever sort of weird day and night cycle that may exist here doesn’t align with the human world’s and his internal clock has fallen off the wall- he’d have said he was all for it. He’s so over the buzzing. Going into some sort of sensory deprivation chamber sounds nice after dealing with however long it’s been of feeling as he felt.

But while actually ascending the tower? It makes him feel nauseous. Rather than tamping down on his power, the tower does something to make him feel almost separate from it. Like it’s forced his demonic energy into a box too small for it, locked it away, and then kicked him and the box so they went tumbling down the hill in a way that couldn’t help but leave you slightly motion sick.

Whatever the tower is for isn’t a good thing. More than anything else in the creepy castle, it feels like a prison. That includes the bloodstained cells he’d seen in one of the other towers. It’s just Wrong.

As he finally reaches the door at the top of the staircase, Dante resolves to just peek in, do a quick check to see if anything jumps out at him, and then turn around to make a break for one of the bedrooms so he can sleep all of this unpleasantness away. 

He kicks open the door, unlocked and unsealed, and doesn’t even bother taking a step into the room as his eyes quickly run over the contents and he preps to leave.

But he doesn’t.

Because as his eyes run over the room they land on something he could never mistake for something else- never again- and the world falls out from under him.

Because there, still, limp, and lying in a heap on the ground, is-

“Vergil?”

[simpforchuchu]

Hi, how are u? I reader Hyuga x reader x SWORD, and I LOVED it! Now I'm imagining possible moments betwwen the reader and Hyuga, and reader and other SWORD leaders/members and Amamya Brothers. Also, their reaction to her and hyuga interactions. Anyway, I wanted to say that I really love your writing and content. And sorry for any errors, English isn't my main language and this is literally the first post I write on tumblr and I don't know what I'm doing hahaha.

Hyuga x reader x SWORD | Part2

a/n: Hii! It's been really a long time huh ? I explained myself before maybe you have seen it :') But anyways... sorry again. Actually i've deleted almost all of my old requests but i kept a few of them cause i want to write that topics too. And this was one of them xjkdkd And thank you so much for your compliments too, love ya 🥰 Sorry it is really short but I hope you like it :') ♥️

Warnings: blood

After a not too long drive, Daruma cars and Rascal motorcycles stopped in front of the designated warehouse. Hyuga turned to the young woman who had been watching for a while and smiled when he saw her so tired that her eyes nearly closed.

"Hey, we need to go inside." He said it softly and Y/n looked up at Hyuga and nodded. As Hyuga got out of the car, Koo and Kaito approached the car and extended his hand to the young woman.

Y/n looked at the hand outstretched to her in surprise, still distrusting anyone so she was nervous. Hyuga came to the other side of the car and put his hand on y/n's uninjured shoulder and smiled at her.

"I don't really like them either, but they're pretty reliable for women"

Koo rolled his eyes and smiled at the young woman again at what Hyuga said mockingly.

"We're here to protect you y/n-san. We know you're injured so let me help you walk please."

Y/n nodded and took the hand that was extended to her. Koo was about to smile and support the young woman when she staggered before she could even take a step. Koo quickly grabbed the young woman tightly.

"I was talking about this y/n-san. Are you okay?"

Y/n nodded and started walking with support from the man holding her. Hyuga was also carefully watching the young woman.

She wasn't very bulky, she looked rather slender and weak. Her hair was disheveled and there were bloodstains on her clothes. But her gaze… her gaze was very different.

When they entered the warehouse, everyone in the warehouse turned to the door. Y/n struggled to continue walking even though she was uncomfortable with so many people looking at her.

The other leaders looked at the young woman with confidence.

Rocky was angry when he saw her injured and weak, he was angered by some people hurting a young woman like this. Murayama stared in surprise and admiration. The young woman was very beautiful, but he knew she was older than him, so he had to be respectful.

Pi and Takeshi looked seriously up and down with the familiar face. She seemed worse than the last time they saw her, it must have been hard living the fugitive life.

Cobra, on the other hand, smiled as soon as y/n walked in, thinking she might be scared.So he wanted to appear as sincere as he could so she could trust them.

The Amamiya Brothers were the same as always. Hiroto coldly stared at the woman he saw in the photograph, while Masaki offered a stupid smile.

After Koo and y/n, Hyuga entered the warehouse and shouted

"Oi, where's the doctor? Her wound is bleeding, it needs to be bandaged as soon as possible."

When Rocky looked at Kizzy, Kizzy pointed to the man next to him.

"The doctor is here, Koo-san this way please."

Koo walked over to the chairs in the middle of the warehouse and helped y/n sit down. Y/n nodded her head and tried to take off her jacket, failing, Hyuga rolled his eyes and approached her.

"Okay, let me-"

He slowly helped the young woman take off her jacket and frowned when he saw that y/n's arm was a pool of blood. Y/n was looking straight at him.

Hyuga sat across from her and the doctor looked at the young woman's arm.

"What the hell did you do to your arm?"

Y/n muttered quietly

"I took the bullet myself"

Y/n rolled her eyes as the doctor's eyes widened.

"You're lucky you didn't die, miss"

Y/n grinned at what was said and muttered

"Yes, I am very lucky".

Hyuga, on the other hand, smiled at the young woman's mocking demeanor. He thought there was something about her that attracted him...

[moonsundra]

GUYS I think I found my style, still working on it, but I'm definitely getting there. That's the first time I loved my digital drawings, omg. That has never happened before. I have already made 2 drawings( well, one done and the other one is a sketch) for the fraxus week prompts, I'm so excited and nervous about my first entry. Anyway, here's my "little" rant, because I have no one to talk to about it and I know no one will see it( kinda treat this blog as a diary at this point) but I guess if you want to get to know me better here it is. I was always drawing only realism - portraits, skeletons, skulls and nature with a pencil on paper( can you tell I major in biology lol), a little bit of anime style too. i find it a lot easier to do realism, I just have to copy what I see. I love artists with stylized styles so much, you don't understand how much🛐, it's a lot of work and I love all of the unique styles. If someone who makes art is reading it, I want you to know you're very loved by me, no matter if you're a pro or a beginner, I love you❤️ I'm not an artist and I'm fine with that ( I'm a science teacher lol, I hope none of my students will ever find out about my hobby) I just love drawing, learning how construction and color work and it takes away my anxiety and worries, makes me focused only on the art I'm making. I really did feel like I was already good at art. But not that long ago I got an iPad with procreate and wanted to try digital art. I have never been so humbled. I couldn't understand how layers work, I was chicken scratching all the time, because I couldn't get the pressure sensitivity right and IT DIDN'T FEEL LIKE PAPER AT ALL😭 probably didn't help that I use a fake ass apple pencil, that can't do it right. I needed like 3 months( probably less, but felt like it) to finally start being confident in my lines. I knew I didn't want to draw realism anymore. It felt boring. At first I tried mixing it with an anime style, but I hated it. You have no idea how much time those first drawings that I posted took. No less than 10 hours. And a lot of the lines there were traced from my paper drawings. I was only starting to get into digital art, it's all so embarrassing to look at right now. If I could redo them now I would change a lot of things. I didn't know anything about blending modes, now that I look at the hair and eyes IT'S SO BAD, I didn't know how to change the size of canvas and so on. I have never been in any art community, because I didn't really own any social media, my friends are all from STEM and I'm forever an outsider :) I don't think I have ever even talked to an artist, even though I wish I could. I was very stupid back then about many digital art topics, but now I've educated myself a lot more. everyday I draw and everyday I learn something new and it's so exciting, I haven't felt that way about art in a long time. But at the same time I'm this 🤏 close to give up on digital art, delete this whole blog , break down and hate myself for ever trying

[eyeslikewatercoolers]

WIP Wednesday- Wedding Planner AU

Edit (6/27/23): This is the WIP for the old (and deleted) version of Something Borrowed. The new version will be posted very soon ☺️ I’m keeping this WIP in particular up until further notice

The full Part 3 is coming soon! Here's a sneak peek of Something Borrowed. Also thank you to @themetaluna for helping me figure out how to format a one-sided phone call lol.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Wait, so you really know a lot about martial arts? That is so cool!"

"Yeah, I competed in taekwondo until I was almost sixteen years old, I loved it so much."

Sasha was sitting at a small table across from Anetra, in the small community room of the church Anetra's family had attended before she was born. The church was a few miles outside of Las Vegas, sitting on a few acres of private church property. Sasha flew out to Las Vegas for a couple days to see the wedding venue and find local vendors for the ceremony. It was also a good excuse for Sasha to spend time with Anetra, but that's beside the point.

Sasha and Anetra have been trying wedding cake samples from a local baker that Sasha met at a wedding expo a year ago. She could have sworn that the owner of Poppy's Bakery told her that she plans to close the business soon, but the store was up and running that morning when Sasha picked up the samples. Anetra showed Sasha around the church and introduced her to the leader of the church as well, who would be officiating the wedding. Sasha usually wouldn't spend a whole afternoon of cake sampling and touring a church for a client, but since the wedding was in three short weeks, but they were all in a time crunch.

"So why did you stop competing? You must have been really talented in taekwondo." Sasha felt so invested in learning more about Anetra's life, especially since it was just the two of them that day.

"Well, my mom said that it wasn't really a lady-like activity for me and-" Anetra was cut off by her cell phone ringing, and looked at who the caller was. Sasha noticed that Anetra's eyes slightly fell once she read the contact's name, "Oh, it's my fiancee, excuse me while I take this," Anetra answered the call and got out of her chair to step into the hallway. Sasha nodded and slipped out her own phone, sending a quick text message to Malaysia to ask how the CCC was doing while she was out of town. She tried to not eavesdrop on Anetra's phone call, but since the church was so empty in the middle of the week, it was really hard not to, especially since it caught her attention. Sasha listened to Anetra's voice in the hallway, with pauses in between for her fiance to speak.

"-said that we only needed to do it that once...Yes, I do want to be a good wife for you, but-... Yes, I know that, but I'm with Sasha right now at the church...Our wedding planner, Sasha?... Okay, but what if your wife comes home early?"

Sasha heard a long pause from Anetra, almost thinking that the phone call ended until her voice was heard again, but this time lowered. "It's not going to hurt again this time, right?... Okay, I'll tell my mom I'm babysitting or something. I'll be over later, do you want me to come in through the backyard again? Okay, love you too, bye."

Sasha quickly busied herself with pretend-scrolling through Instagram when Anetra came back in the room. She watched Anetra from above her phone screen as she stood behind the chair she was once sitting in before the phone call. Sasha slipped her phone back into her purse as Anetra began to speak in a slightly nervous tone, "Um, I think I've tried enough of the cakes for today. My fiancee wanted me to go over to his house to help him with, uh, the church fundraiser. With his first wife, obviously." Anetra rambled on, avoiding eye contact and tapping her fingers on the back of the chair.

Sasha stood up from her seat and took a step towards Anetra. "Are you sure? You haven't even picked a favorite flavor." She tilted her head as she pointed out the obvious, but also trying not to scare the bride off so quick.

"Oh, um, I like the lemon cake with the raspberry filling. I think that one would be good for the wedding." Anetra helped closed the lid of the box with the remainder of the samples and quickly cleared off the table of the disposable plates and forks.

Sasha watched her buzz around the room before she stepped over to Anetra by the trash can. "Okay, if you say so. How about we walk together to the parking lot? I can give you a ride in my rental car if you want." Sasha offered and reached out to put a gentle hand on Anetra's forearm. She felt tense under Sasha's touch, as she glanced to where her hand lay.

"Actually, wait. There's somewhere I want to show you first." Anetra moved Sasha's hand from her arm and began to leave the room and into the empty hallway. "It's my favorite part of the church, but I need to make a quick detour first."

[a-froger-epic]

Get out your glitter leotards and pour some champagne in your cat mugs! 🥂 🍾 It’s time to celebrate Freddie! 🎉😸

🎊 Freddie Mercury Weekend 2021 🎊

❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜

ABOUT THE EVENT

This weekend is a content creation event in honour of the man himself, the legend we all love, Freddie Mercury! Once more, everyone who is inspired by Freddie is invited to share their creativity with the fandom. You can write, draw, edit, record, even cross-stitch 😉 content for absolutely anything related to Freddie, any ship, any genre, any way you like. This is an indiscriminately inclusive, positive event. Everyone is welcome, there is no wrong way to be a fan of Freddie! (Except convincing yourself you're dating his ghost maybe. That's pretty wrong. And weird. Don't do that.)

WHEN? On the 21st, 22nd and 23rd of May.

HOW? On the above dates (or after!), post your contributions to the AO3 collection or alternatively on Tumblr, tagged ‘#fmw2021’ or/and ‘#freddie mercury weekend 2021’. If you post on Tumblr, please also tag @a-froger-epic to make sure you get a reblog from me!

❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜

THE PROMPTS

You can be as free with the prompts as you like. They are here to inspire, there is no wrong way to write them! Change them around, mix them up, make them fem!Freddie, A/B/O, add your favourite ship. Anything goes! 😊

21st of May - 500-1000 word challenge!

We’re kicking off the event with ficlets and drabbles. First time writer just testing the waters? No need for an epic, just write a scene! No time to write but you want to participate? Surely you’ll find time for 500 words! 😉 Interpret these mini-prompts however you like (every one is a separate prompt, but you can combine them!):

Make-Up 💄   |   Pain/Pleasure 👀

Strip 👕   |   Ring 💍

Forbidden 🤫   |   Delilah 🐈

Piano 🎹   |   Dormitory 🛏 

Outrageous 🎉   |   Contentment 😌

Come Together 🎇   |   Ballet 🩰

Piece of Art 🎨   |   Leather 🧥

Cockring 🐔   |   Kimono 👘

Petals 🌸   |   Leotard 🕺🏻

Mustache 🧔   |   Last Time 😔

22nd of May - Is This The Real Life? 

A list of real event/canon timeline prompts from Freddie’s life. How real you want to keep them, however, is entirely up to you!

Down in flames

Freddie is 16 years old when he leaves boarding school. Does it have something to do with the school gardener, Sanjay? Did he flunk his exams or did he not even sit them? Is one thing connected to the other? Does he really find a boyfriend when he goes to stay with his aunt in Mumbai (then Bombay)? Either way, there’s the small matter of his parents finding out about all of it... (Sources: x x )

When Freddie met Kenny

Freddie is a guest on Kenny Everett's radio show in spring 1974. Freddie is living with Mary, Kenny is married. Two gay men, deep in the closet. To no one's surprise, they hit it off immediately. (Source: x )

But when did he? 

At some point during his relationship with Mary, prior to his relationship with David, Freddie had already begun sleeping with men. But how and when did that first happen? Cottaging in London? On tour somewhere in the world? Your guess is as good as ours… 

Flying High

Sex, Drugs and Rock n' Roll. Like all rock bands of their time, Queen doesn’t escape the copious amounts of cocaine in the entertainment industry for long. Somewhere on tour in America, perhaps, Freddie is first introduced to it. Where? How? 

Hide your tears

Jim said that he tried to be strong for Freddie and only cried in private, so as not to burden Freddie with his feelings. But this time, he is found. 

One-liners:

In 1969, Freddie doesn’t know how to cook an egg and neither does Roger (Source: x )

In 1977, Freddie meets Joe while on tour in Boston and starts dating him behind David's back

In 1990, Brian and Freddie work on 'The Show Must Go On' (Source: x )

In a year of your choice, Jim reminisces about his fondest moment(s) with Freddie

In 1976, Freddie and Mary end their relationship 

In 1984, Winnie gives Freddie a wedding ring (middle of the post: x )

In the late 60s, Freddie agrees to model for an Ealing Art School fashion show, but panics and flees the runway (Source: x )

In 1974, Freddie is strip-searched upon arrival in Australia (Source: x )

In 1982, Freddie and Roger go shopping in Amsterdam (Source: x )

In 1978, Freddie swings from a chandelier - naked (Source: x )

23rd of May - Is It Just Fantasy?

A list of AU prompts to spark your imagination. Take them and run with them or change them up, just have fun!

Make your dreams come true

Freddie hasn't been very fortunate in his life, until he finds a very special oil lamp, and rubs it just the right way. 

Beautiful stranger

Freddie meets an alluring stranger at a masquerade ball, who has more secrets than he can hide behind a mask. But Freddie has some of his own. 

Thicker than water 

Freddie agrees to a dreadful fate in order to save his little sister from the very same. Fortunately, he has friends who are more than willing to help him, but can they? Or are they, too, in danger?

Diamonds are a boy's best friend

Freddie is the prized jewel of the court, a skilled belly-dancer and entertainer, but he may also be plotting murder and getting away with it. 

Almost Real

In a distant future, humans have all but done away with face to face interaction. Humanity largely lives online. Children grow up isolated and live with only their families well into young adulthood. Cybersex is the new normal, although some families take a puritanical approach for fear of addiction. One day, impossibly, a real life young man falls through the containment field in Freddie’s back garden. 

One-liners:

This plane is going to crash (Freddie knew there was a reason he hated flying) 

Shipwrecked on an island (Freddie could never bear to be alone, but luckily/unfortunately for him…) 

Hunger Games AU (Freddie is so dead) 

A terrible road accident (Everyone is so dead, or are they?) 

Blind Date AU (Freddie's best friend is so dead for setting him up with this person… or are they…) 

Bank robbery (but who are the robbers and who are the hostages?) 

Magic AU ("Yer a wizard, Freddie!")

Film Noir AU (Secrets and cigarette holders) 

Interior Design AU (Does the carpet match the drapes?)

The Bodyguard AU (“And I will always love yooouuuu…”)

❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜

RULES & FAQ

⛔ Strictly No Hate ⛔

This is the NUMBER ONE RULE of the event, to ensure that everybody feels safe. No rudeness, provocations or hate aimed at creators or other commenters will be permitted, not on AO3 nor Tumblr.

Follow these steps if you receive a comment or ask that distresses you:

Do not engage. (You can take a screenshot as proof.)

Delete it. No ifs, no buts. Just delete it. (Don’t hesitate to block anon hate on Tumblr.)

Alert me ( @a-froger-epic ) or @aboutnothingness, who is lending me a hand to make sure all needs are attended, all questions are answered and everything runs smoothly. We are here to actively support you. We’ve got your back, and we will gladly talk to you and help you feel better.

If you choose to ignore this rule, your work may be removed from the event. We would hate to resort to that.

But what if one of the works has upset me?

Can the thing that upset you be tagged, but it wasn’t? Then please inform @a-froger-epic or @aboutnothingness, and we will bring it to the creator’s attention. (Remember to use the appropriate tags, everybody!)

Was the thing that upset you already tagged? Or is it perhaps simply the characterisation you find disagreeable? Then we suggest you click on the ‘back’ button, take a deep breath and remind yourself it's just fanfic.

Who can participate?

Anyone who is inspired by Freddie Mercury in any way shape or form. This event is open to all.

Can I combine prompts from different days?

By all means! We look forward to your futuristic Freddie-gets-kicked-out-of-boarding-school Maycury Film Noir AU. With leotards. Go crazy.

I'm not sure where my creation fits in, what day do I post it? 

The days, like the prompts, are only suggestions. We don't mind when you post it, as long as you post it! Even if it's two weeks late! 

Help, I've never posted fic before! 

Don't worry, we've got you! (And more importantly, we've got AO3 invites!) @aboutnothingness is more than happy to walk you through the process of setting up an account and is also offering her services as a beta.

I’m still too nervous to participate!

You can post anonymously to the collection. You can disable anon comments on your work. You can disable comments entirely and just collect the kudos. You can close anon asks on Tumblr temporarily. But most importantly, we are here for you and we want you here!

❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜

“I love the fact that I make people happy, in any form. Even if it’s just half an hour of their lives, in any way that I can make them feel lucky or make them feel good, or bring a smile to a sour face, that to me is worthwhile.”

- Freddie Mercury

[fictional-worlds-are-exquisite]

i am out there!! i'm glad you liked it! i'm definitely trying out the recipe you left in the tags. it sounds way better than just banana and peanut butter. i always have to pay a lot of attention when i type banana because i've ended up with "bananana" way too many times

i was planning to run straight to your askbox the second i saw you replied but then the end of the semester happened and it killed me. hopefully i'm done with it now

i do exactly the same thing with height! if you tell me your height in feet i have absolutely no idea how tall that is. if you say that in centimetres that's easy. i mean you're 155cm so that's 12cm shorter than me. when you told me that in feet i was like okay cool i have no idea how much shorter than actually is

i love birds!!! so that seems awesome! i am now titling you the queen of birds. and i'm glad your vacation was good! i think i saw a couple of posts you made about it so it definitely does seem like a lot of fun! and did you ever figure out completely what that see through animal (?) in the sand was? i had no idea stuff like that even existed so now i'm invested in knowing what it is

i am 100% hiring you for my coming out party i'm throwing in a couple of years. it's gonna be fun. if we don't get immediately kicked out i promise good food and some spicy drama between my homophobic relatives and my accepting relatives! and my brother's, who i already came out to, dry commentary

i was definitely not the one you told about burma trails! but from the tags i'm just gonna say how is that allowed and why does it seem like a weird type of torture? i hate it, i probably would've had a heart attack 3 seconds in

oh yeah i actually can't tell most of the time if the memories from my childhood are actual memories or if it's just a combination of having seen photos and heard stories about it

my glasses prescription is fine i think. my eye doctor said that i get headaches from glasses because... well i tried to explain this and then deleted it all because it was a very scientific explanation when she said it and i zoned out pretty much halfway through and even the part that i did understand i can't translate to english! but it has something to do with the fact that with contacts it's enough to move my eyes in the direction i want to look at and with glasses i have to move my whole head and my brain got so used to contacts that it overdoes it with the eye movements when wearing glasses? i dunno. this is the best i can do in explaining it

i must admit i'm very jealous of the never snows part because while snow is pretty to look at it's absolutely freezing! for the past week i slept under a duvet, three blankets while wearing pants and a long sleeve shirt and i still woke up cold. because for a couple of nights it was around -22°C. it's great

ohhh you got pretty lucky as a kid then! my kid self would have absolutely lost it at getting the equivalent of 5/10 bucks. i probably would have bought so much candy

excellent!!! hope you’re enjoying the vague void from whence you came! i’ve never said whence before in my LIFE i wonder if i used it correctly. anyway. the actual recipe was way more specific but once i saw ‘2 frozen bananas’ and looked at all the sliced bananas in my fridge, having no idea how many there were, i just started improvising sdfkhsdfs. I’d be interested to try it with yoghurt though if I can get some dairy free plain stuff, I’m sure I can somewhere. Banana used to be my biggest problem when I was younger. Then I learnt words like occasion and necessary and embarrassed and I realised the more english I tried to learn, the worse my life was gonna get. And I was right. On the bright side, developing an inability to ever spell occasion correctly made banana seem a lot easier to handle.

that is fair. end of semesters are rough. i cannot function during them at all. i hope everything chills out for you!! i’m not sure how the school year is over there but maybe it’s break time? that’d be nice. but rest in peace anyway, enjoy being dead! they say necromancy is frowned upon in all societies but I reckon it’s just called making a friend when you’re dead so maybe you wanna take that up as a hobby! I’ve heard it’s nice this time of year!

yup! sometimes I’m like oh you’re 5 foot 4? that sounds way taller than me. but it...it really isn’t...it’s like an extra 8cm or something. which adds up! but in my head I was picturing a MUCH taller height. In my head I think I picture 6 foot and 5 foot 4 as the same height, now that I think about it.

!!!!! my first order as queen of birds is to meet a morepork face to face so we can chat about the price of pork these days. yes!! the first half was nice but the second half was really fun. my best guess is still that it’s a salp? Maybe? So many salp pictures are massive groups of them but like,, from what i can tell of singular photos,,, it was maybe that? I guess the only other possibility is it’s just some clear jellyfish but salp does seem more likely. At first I was like oh duuude boob implant for the ocean!! but then I realised it actually seemed kinda alive and was probably an actual creature. my bad.

excellent. i’ll break any tension by dropping the vampire act for the mouse act. will do backflips for cheese. will bite ankles for homophobic comments. Will pull a knife out of god knows where, not to threaten anyone, just to clean my nails with to make everyone nervous. I offer many services. I’m flexible. And I love me some good food.

I actually DON’T know the reason behind burma trails. I really don’t. The reason ‘it’s a fun activity!’ seems a little fake. if it’s a fun activity then why did Mrs. G. tell us a horror story about the forest before we went out to navigate said forest at night, blindfolded, surrounded by wildlife and parents supervising (*cough* waiting for the opportunity to jump out at you *cough*) with a teacher at the end waiting to scare us. So we can learn how to navigate the forest in the dark? So we learn how to follow a mysterious rope INTO the forest at night? seems dodgy to me. school camps be like [drives you out to forest] follow this rope and don’t take your blindfold off. like. bruh. i almost DID have a heart attack one time, I got stuck like something was holding my leg. First thought-ah, must’ve got my leg stuck in a big stick. Second thought-maybe this is one of the parents fucking around, it feels more like a grip than a twig. Third thought-I cannot get my leg free no matter what I do what the fuck is HAPPENING so I started crying out for help. When they FINALLY came they found nothing my leg was caught on so that was fun. love that for me. I was able to move as soon as they arrived. That’s not weird at all. anyway.

I think most of my early memories are just from stories I’ve been told and photos I’ve seen. My memory tends to be horrible I highly doubt I remember that one time I was eating dirt from the garden out in the yard gleefully. I just saw the photo evidence. mm spaghetti. bone apple teeth. my character hasn’t changed at all since I was a wee babe.

ohhhh okay. I think I get what you mean by that. Thank you for trying to explain! That’s really interesting. I guess I do move my head a lot with glasses. Although I have massive glasses so it’s probably easier for me to just move my eyes where I want. I reckon with smaller glasses I’d have to move my head way more.

the temperature comment is so funny because during the heart of winter i tend to sleep with a sheet, a blanket, a duvet, then 2-4 blankets on top while in a long sleeve shirt and long pants and sometimes bed socks and often a hottie (i’ve never realised how that sounds out of context...a hot water bottle...is calling it a hottie normal or is a my family thing? is this a nz thing? now i’m questioning myself). in my uni accommodation last year we didn’t have proper heating during most of winter and well. there was a quilt added to everything else. every blanket i could find. how cold does it get here in winter? rarely ever past 0 degrees celsius. I would literally die in your position, clearly. I could not survive that. Props to you for making it through aha.

yesss. Before when I found five dollar notes it’d be on the street and I’d be like oh no! Mum we have to hand this into the police station! It’s a lot of money, someone will be looking for it! Understandably she was like,, lindsey they might miss it but there’s not really any way you can find them,,, I still refused to spend it. That was like my first time really getting that much money for myself. The dairy on main street sold lollies for 10 cents each and they had like, 30 different lil glass boxes so you’d go I want 3 of 26, 5 of 7, ohhh and 5 of 13 please! I dunno if they’re still 10 cents each but I thought it was the best thing ever as a kid. I think I wanted to save the money though sfdjsdkfhs put it in my piggy bank to save up for something ‘super cool’. Aka probably like a neat soft toy to sleep with sdfsdkfs.

[geek-gem]

Transformers Dark Of The Moon

I've finally seen the movie again after these years. Let me warn you, spoilers and I have a lot to say.

Their is really a lot to say about this movie. But I'm glad I finally got my to do list of watching the first three Bayformers now.

Another thing I'll be honest about I was gonna play the Dark Of The Moon game on PS3 but it requires more MB's to clear out but I decided fuck it I don't care. Especially it's a short game but I'm not doing that shit. I just wanna watch this film especially remembering this is a long film.

But back to the movie. I'll be honest and I'm not critic and my opinion may be invalid because lots of people hate Bayformers. We have a new continuity with the Bumblebee movie which I think is the best decision this franchise has done.

To me this movie while I like the first film from 2007.

After watching this and I'm still having some feelings after being it. But I feel this is my favorite out of the Bayformers saga. This is basically where it should of ended and should of let the Bayformers end with dignity. Or at least until a new director came along like Travis Knight or others.

Especially like I remember a movie guy named Cure4 on DeviantArt but he's gone from that shit. I agree with him and I'm thinking this is the sequel the 2007 film should of had.

I'm pissed and I hate that Age Of Extinction was the follow up to this film. Despite how people feel about this film, my God Bay tried to redeem himself after Revenge Of The Fallen a film that is like some sort of weird parody there the video game tie in's I see as the best version especially the PS3/Xbox 360/PC versions and even the Wii/PS2 versions.

Another thing I wanna reveal when I saw this film for the first time in theaters I actually used this.

I seriously wore that and it worked and it was awesome. It was a experience despite I felt nervous. I was young but what the hell it's gonna be 8 years since the movie was released. Especially the 3D was awesome when I saw it in theaters.

But back to the movie again I'm sorry. I'm not gonna make this a full review I don't wanna waste anyone's time.

When I think about it Sam is a lot better in this film. While I do feel some moments could be worked on. He should of apologized to Bee after he meets him I know Sam's angry. Especially this development of Sam wants to matter. This is much better then what we had in Revenge Of The Fallen.

Carly I honestly find more likable then Mikaela. Seriously I do especially that moment where she literally tells Megatron that he will basically be Sentinel's bitch if he doesn't do anything. She basically treats Sam with a bit more respect and well I like the relationship more then what Sam and Mikaela had.

Lennox and Epps were always great. Especially Epps during the scenes in Chicago. Simmons is seriously entertaining in this and Dutch is a blessing.

Let me just talk about Dylan Gould. This guy he's been on my mind. I made two joke posts him deleted the first one of he's been waiting for that betrayal towards Sam.

Patrick Dempsey honestly and his portrayal of Dylan is a performance that left an impression on me. Because I was actually surprised by his reveal of who he actually was. But seriously this man is a dick and in a way I like him. Despite seeing in the film him talking about making tough choices and him being on the winning side. Yet over the course of the film he starts to take it a bit personal.

While I kept thinking before seeing the film he was enjoying it maybe. But my view on it changed. I just think Patrick Dempsey kind of owns the role.

Yes we should talk about the robots and let me be honest. What I love about this film it's basically the Decepticons strike back. They are basically winning in this film. I love the Chicago invasion scene.

I do feel like the entire Bayformers series yes their should of been more Transformers screen time. Especially the Decepticons in this case. While I feel in Revenge Of The Fallen I can tell Starscream feels like he's a little snarky in some parts. While I know he's kissing up to Megatron to cover his ass. I would of liked some what....I don't know more snarky shit or something Starscream would say or do. Maybe even during his confrontation with Sam he mentioning after the Decepticons win that he would overthrow Megatron and become the winner.

I remember when I was young when I saw this for the first time. For Starscream I had hoped he would betray Megatron yet that would be so much for one film. Because that's Starscream from G1, Animated, and other continuities. At least one last hurrah before he dies.

Especially I remember when I was young I wanted Skids and Mudflap, along with Leo to come back....I was young and I enjoyed Revenge Of The Fallen a lot more okay. Wouldn't mind Leo but their seems to be a bit much but what the hell I wanted Dinobots in this film.(well it's said Skids and Mudflap are shown as cars but they were supposed to die....they did die by Sentinel in the movie comic)

I dig Soundwave in this film. Even Laserbeak these guys are douches but would of liked to seen more Soundwave. Especially I like this little dynamic between Dylan and Soundwave I know that's weird of me to say. Would of liked to seen more.

Shockwave in this film seriously I was hyped for him when I was young and playing the prequel game. I feel it's stupid he's not as important. He should of had more lines and more interactions. I even agree with a comment on YouTube he should of been in the Africa scene.

While he is badass it's stupid how he goes out but give him a better send off and a fight with Optimus Prime. I wanted to see more Shockwave and I think it would of been better if he was voiced by Mark Ryan. Frank Welker didn't do a bad job and he actually had two lines spoken in English.

At least his driller creature is cool. But seriously after all the hype and I want to just put some promotional stuff.

Whatever if this one is official or not. It's just in Shockwave's own words......logical. Or my own words fucking logical.

The reason I'm saying Mark Ryan because of his English accent and I want to be reminded of Corey Burton. Sorry for sounding weird.

Let me say I feel Sentinel Prime is probably the best antagonist actually we've had in a Transformers live action film especially in the Bayformers. Characters like Shatter and Dropkick are great. Even Lockdown was nice. But I liked Sentinel. I'll be honest I was actually surprised when I witnessed his betrayal when I was young. I thought the Decepticons were gonna force him to use the Pillars maybe even Shockwave but what we got was something else.

Also I really liked the scenes with Optimus and Sentinel. I do feel we should of gotten more and had them be longer. Especially I like Optimus in this. I do see their was this father and son or brother like relationship that Bay talked about. But would of liked to seen more.

The other Autobots are alright cool. I do feel the whole Que/Wheeljack thing was just seriously stupid. Especially now before Bumblebee a Wheeljack design that was more accurate. Tragic about the way he died.

Looking back at the film theirs not a lot of Cybertronian scenes but they leave an impact.

Also I really wanna talk about the ending with Optimus, Sentinel, and Megatron. We should of gotten more Megatron I agree.

But the scene where leading up to Optimus killing Sentinel seeing it in action after going through the movie. It is awkward in a way.

Yet I'll be honest Sentinel basically deserved it. In fact of the Decepticons, and Dylan fucking deserved what they got. Because after everything they did their to me was not a way shit would end peacefully or something. Including your hearing this from a Steven Universe fan a show that deals with pacifism and other shit.

I do feel and I've talked about this before but I might delete it now because I'm gonna mention it here. But I feel if the scene went like it was Megatron who kills Sentinel or this dark idea of Sentinel killing himself or even himself dying from wounds. Especially giving Megatron and Optimus more of a fight even with Optimus haven't one arm.

Or hell seriously Bay should of gone with the original that was kept in the novel that Megatron teamed up with Optimus to kill Sentinel and Megatron would stop what he's doing. Also hearing that it would of explored Megatron more. That ending would have his look in The Last Knight make sense that he went to Cybertron after Dark Of The Moon and over time he decided to go back leading the Decepticons. Instead they had to kill him off and the whole Galvatron thing. Even though Megatron got what was coming to him.

Gonna be honest the Starscream death while I like the idea of Sam having the courage to take on Starscream and even killing him. But I do feel Starscream should of died a more I guess epic death.

Especially I weirdly wanted Sam to be all Cade Yeager shooting Decepticons and some how killing them. I mean you Sam jumping on cars and even sliding under them.

Gonna say before seeing the movie I kept thinking Dylan in his fight with Sam should of died a more brutal death. Such as Sam telling him to shut up after the messager comment and beating him to death. But Dylan's death is perfect. Seriously he gets hit in the face with some sort of pole thing and dies by the pillar.

Listen I'm sorry for rambling a lot. This became more of some review or reaction. The action was seriously nice and the special effects, score was always excellent.

Gonna be honest while I wasn't emotional much throughout the movie. Did feel emotional over the, "The fight will be your own" scene and felt a little at the, "No Prisoners Only Trophies" scene....that should of had more weight. I'll be honest when I was young I was expecting Sam for some reason come out of hiding yelling no in slow motion, surprising everyone then the Decepticon drop ship gets hijacked.

Gonna say did enjoy Wheelie and Brains I like them. Glad they we're still around in later films.

I think I've talked too much. Basically I think this is the best Bayformers sequel, this is what we should got gotten as a sequel to the 2007 film. It's better then Revenge Of The Fallen, Age Of Extinction, and The Last Knight.

My only weird complaint that isn't towards the movie.....Dinobots could of been in this some how.....during the battle of Chicago. We should of gotten Dinobots vs the Driller. Grimlock voiced by Vin Diesel or whatever I've had that weird casting idea I think for years. Or even Devastator in this because it's a huge open battle with so many opportunities. While I understand Michael Bay didn't wanna go larger like he did with Revenge Of The Fallen. I'm just disappointed that the next film we got after this was Age Of Extinction.

Tags dealt with sorry that got wrong, their was a lot to talk about. Glad I could talk about this and again I finished my to do list of rewatching the original trilogy. Bring on the new cinematic universe in the Knightverse that started out with Travis Knight's Bumblebee I'm ready for more excellent films.