#i've read it and im on my third watch rn lol

[cyancees]

sometimes when im waiting for friends to be ready to hang out on discord i just start drawin characters with my mouse from memory here's the part 1 guys (i know dio's fit is sooooo incorrect no way can i remember that thing)

[sirpeppersto]

tagged by @c-130jsuperhercules :D i haven't done one of these in a while and it's the first one on this blog oh boy

my favorite color is blue, i really like strong blues like royal blue or pthalo blue. always a big fan of blue

last song: rush by troye sivan. we are GAY

currently reading: Time Enough For Love by Robert A Heinlein, ive been listening to the audiobook here and there but not so much recently. im about a third of the way through, it's really good. its the second heinlein book ive read, and i really like his take on sci-fi, and i love how he writes

currently watching: samurai jack 😎 i watched all of it back in 2018(? maybe 2017) and i hadnt watched it since, but my fiance wanted to rewatch it bc he hasnt watched every episode. we're almost done with it, and after that we're gonna finish the other shows we're watching. we will finish mr. robot some day lol

currently craving: i want to eat a big cake so bad rn. i for real almost doordashed cake last night but I've been with my friends since yesterday afternoon and i don't want to buy cake for everyone lol. someone get me a cake PLEASE

coffee or tea: honestly......i think im becoming more of a coffee person now. i used to be super into drinking tea and i still drink tea pretty often, but i love coffee. funny think is my friends brought me a drink from a local coffee place just now and instead of getting coffee or tea i got an energy drink 💀 the last 24 hours have taken a toll on my body lol

I'm gonna tag @andromachos @aldercaps @brbananas @silenthill @crj-200 @beesnutz uhhhhhhh and anyone else who wants to do it :) my energy drink is not helping i need a nap big time

[liria10]

Thanks for the tag @happy10thousandyears!!

tag someone you want to know better

favorite color: Tbh i can never settle on one but I do like purple a lot, even if i rarely ever wear it or use it much in my art lol

last song: Ghost Dive by Polkadot Stingray because I am nothing if not a pokemon nerd (also the animated mv is v cool)

last movie: Memories, because I had seen Magnetic Rose ages ago, but I hadn't yet seen the other 2 from that anthology, and tbh I think they're worth a watch, Canon Fodder especially has some really interesting directing & overall I think both it & Stink Bomb are good pieces of animation to check out, even if Magnetic Rose is the standout one for sure.

currently watching: For once I'm not really watching much tbh, outside of the latest Pokemon anime, Pokemon Horizons which is like. really really good. Oh! And i'm also currently going through Ultraseven because a good friend recommended it to me, and i'm not super deep in rn but i'm really enjoying it!

other stuff i watched this year: uuuh a Lot of things tbh, but the ones that I enjoyed the most were the OG Kamen Rider show, Ultra Q (beloved) & Ultraman. I don't watch that many live action shows normally, so it's been nice discovering a few new things

shows i dropped this year/didn’t finish: None really? so far i've finished all the ones i started this year, or if I haven't yet i plan on doing so soon. I've not yet watched all of the second season of Witch from Mercury because i got busy, but i do really want to finish that soon!

currently reading: i'm currently rereading Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint for the third time because teehee hyperfixation, and i'm also reading at the same time In a Glass Darkly by Sheridan le Fanu

currently listening to (sneaky additional question!): I don't really listen to a lot of podcast either tbh. I started Malevolent some months back but i was fairly disappointed with it so i've not picked it up again in a while. I don't really like leaving things unfinished though, so i might catch up someday.

currently working on: I'm actually working on a game project around roman law for schools & universities, because after a game jam we turned the project into a whole ass game, so i'm still currently doing a bunch of art for that!! Close to the finish line now....

current obsession: well the pokemon dlc dropped last week so im currently utterly obsessed with Ogerpon & her story, she's great, i love her so so much, and also just, everything about the dlc story (kieran & carmine live rent free in my head now i guess)

tagging @rassilon-imprimatur @wild-moss-art @michiruze @keingleichgewicht @time-warsnapshots (if you guys want to!)

[sleevesareforlosers]

DISCUSSION GROUP!!!!

i’m looking forward to having some more free time at some point 😭 hopefully i’ll have more time to do sewing and stuff i haven’t gotten to in ages 🤞 & i’m really gonna try and continue my mandatory happiness mindset!!! (<- read abt it in laura jane grace’s book it’s like. maybe everything sucks but u can often choose to look at things in a positive light it’s really really helped me!! like. i can go into things w a positive mindset instead of a miserable one and control that at least yk?)

i’m currently out of town & it’s around the 30s. not bad wish it was snowing but i’ll take what i can get, i can wear my $10 80s windbreaker which i’m happy about!! and if i could be anywhere i’d want to be somewhere with snow but honestly? i’m quite content where i am i love doing big family christmas together.

and. i will be honest as much as i try to seek out new stuff to read/watch/listen to. i love rewatching &c. it’s rly nice and comfortable yk? i’m restarting how to train your dragon actually which is. so lovely <3 and i just did my semiannual big hero 6 watch which was delightful

uno reverse!!!! hope ur doing wonderfully :)

!!!!! fingers crossed for more free time! i've been doin a lot of sewing recently and i forgot how NICE it is so im rlly manifesting you get some more time w ur arts too! and YES thats a good thing to bring w you! i love ljg thats a rlly good philosophy. i should read her book huh

oh thats so fun! not bad weather and ALWAYS a bonus to be wearing a nice windbreaker. im glad ur havin fun doing family + xmas stuff! its one of my fave holidays for like exactly that reason

also okay SO fair of you. i feel like im rlly the same except im not even consistent w my rewatches lol. i SHOULD watch httyd again though. i never watched the third one but ik a lot of my friends rlly liked it

also i AM doing wonderfully thank you!!! for the uno reverse:

im lookin forward to getting cracking on a real job search again in the new year (not gonna start too far out from my current contract ending) and also my boyfriend is gonna come up here again at the end of january so thats like. SUPER exciting. and i think im gonna try and bring forward just like. idk i guess just trying to work on my communication and stuff ive def been working on that lately and i want to keep doing so!

it is currently cold as balls here (-11) and sunny today but its been snowing the last few days so we got like. two feet of snow. which i DO LIKE. i love snow even if its a little functionally irritating. idk where i would be if i could be anywhere rn. itd be nice to see my halifax friends again but itd also be nice to be [where my boyfriend lives] so. yknow. hard choice

and i think it kinda varies actually! im def better at reconsuming whatever media kind but i think i reread books a LOT less often and i try to do the same w movies. but i hardly EVER listen to new music and shows r id say a 50/50? i started derry girls today tho its fantastic

hope you're doing well too matt!!!

[jtbb]

tagged by @rat-daemon and @valentinsylve tysm <3<3<3

three ships: oh man. hannigram obviously, and janto (jack harkness/ianto jones) for my other all-time fave (they are simultaneously much more wholesome and much more angsty than hannigram). for third umm i think molly/reba is underrated <3 as in ive literally never seen anyone mention them but i think they would understand each other yknow

first ship: ah hell. i was probably obsessed w at least one warrior cats pairing when i was a kid but the first one that was actually as part of fandom culture was this one band ship that i will Not name (some of my older mutuals . you can probably guess)

last song: currently criminal by fiona apple, previously mr. rattlebone by matt maeson (both amazing hannigram songs)

last movie: lol watched ferris bueller's day off w my family last friday (we are out of movies to watch)

now reading: im trying really hard to get back into the habit of reading books -- in the past year or so i've started northwind by gary paulsen (the last book by my absolute favorite childhood author), the keith haring journals during my keith haring hyperfix last april, and the three-body problem by liu cixin but i keep just getting stalled halfway through and not finishing any of them. my sister bought me red dragon recently though and i think i can slowly make my way through that!!

currently watching: literally just rewatching hannibal for the nth time. most recent show i started otherwise though was killing eve i rlly wanna finish that when i can <3

currently consuming: i listen to music by eating it. btw. been obsessed w the album an awesome wave by alt-j lately

currently craving: someone on discord posted a picture of some cookies they baked so now im craving cookies. otherwise as always i just crave free time to draw or write out a fic idea i have

too tired to tag anyone rn sorryyyy but mutuals or other followers if u wanna do this <3 hi

[cynicallyneutral]

Arrives holding the entire tales of series

So!! If you're interested in jrpgs, I would highly recommend the Tales of series, specifically Tales of the Abyss (my fav) and Tales of Symphonia are good starting points. Symphonia is on a bunch of platforms (most notably steam) and Abyss is on ps2 but easy to emulate ✨ I would also personally recommend Tales of Zestiria for the characters bc I love them dearly (but the gameplay is.. not so great haha)

Also if you want I'd like to recommend the anime Sirius the Jaeger just bc it's my comfort show sjxk and it's only 12 episodes so easier to commit to

And.. also,, only if you want,,, idk how much you read but all three series by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu are my favorite thing rn bc this genre of Chinese fantasy isn't one I've read before and also!! They're queer romances :D (with also their whole other plot going on so you can enjoy excellent story that is also romantic) I would specifically recommend starting with Heaven Official's Blessing (my personal fav) or Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation!! As I feel those have more solid romantic relationships and they're easier to enjoy maybe?? The third (but first published lol) is The Scum Villain's Self Saving System which I always recommend as being funny bc the main character's narration is very humorous but it's also. God there's so much tragedy and hh but anyway

So yeah there's a dump of things I like if you'd like to try any of them out ajdksk sorry this ended up so long

ooh tbh ive always wanted to try and get into the tales series, i believe there was an anime for tales of zestiria and and i wat hed a few eps before…unless i dreamed that all up??? lmaoooo, i’ll add them to my long list of games to buy lmaoomdfhfjfj tbh i already have a few games that i bought and havent played yet, god forbid i bought both the swsh like 2 or 3 years ago and havent played it djvbcjcj

the art style is nice whoaaa and thr protag..i assume??? looks so cool i would watch it for them hhh, ill try tomorrow!!

those series i keep seeing on twitter bc of my mutuals, ive always been curious what they were taking abt but it seems like a long series……..i dont know if i have the brain capacity to even start them waaah, i hope to check them out someday tho, rn im just…0 braincells

thanks for all the recs!!! i’ll be sure to make a note of them all 💛💛💛💛

[booksfromblackwood]

Is anyone still around in this fandom? If so, I thought I’d post the first chapter of an old fic that I re-wrote last year! Let me know if anyone’s still around, and if you’d be interested in reading more! Hope everyone reading this has a great day! :)

Han has left the chat.

Three Days Before The Disappearance

.Sam.Giddings. added josh_wash, ashleeeeey, xXGamerChrisXx, TheOriginalMatt, HanButterfly, BethWash, Mike_Munroe, EmilyD_, and _Jess.Riley_ to the chat.

.Sam.Giddings. named the chat Info For Tomorrow.

.Sam.Giddings.: Hey guys! Just to keep everyone updated on our travel plans for tomorrow! I know it's going to be a long day for everyone so it's vital we stick to the plan and stay in our groups where possible!

ashleeeeey: Okie-doodle!!

TheOriginalMatt: How are you so organised, Sam? You're a lifesaver!

HanButterfly: Hi!!

BethWash: trust sam to be more prepared than those of us organising the trip lol

xXGamerChrisXx: Since when was 'okie-doodle' a thing?

EmilyD_: Thanks Sam x

xXGamerChrisXx: And thanks so much, sam!

.Sam.Giddings.: So quick reminder of everyone's groups:

_Jess.Riley_: I'm stoked!!

ashleeeeey: That's rich coming from someone whose username is xXGamerChrisXx! :P

.Sam.Giddings.: Ash, Chris, Matt, and myself will start the journey first tomorrow morning.

xXGamerChrisXx: You wound me!

Mike_Munroe: Thanks for the plan, Sam!

TheOriginalMatt: Excited to see everyone tomorrow! This is going to be a killer weekend for sure!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Em, Mike, and Jess, you guys are next.

ashleeeeey: You're so dramatic!! XD

Mike_Munroe: Team Two here we go!!

xXGamerChrisXx: Made you smile, though! ;-)

josh_wash: what about us

.Sam.Giddings.: I'm just getting to that!

ashleeeeey: True :)

xXGamerChrisXx: You guys are already there and are therefore irrelevant! :P

.Sam.Giddings.: Han, Beth, and Josh, you guys are there already!

josh_wash: thanks cochise i feel so appreciated

BethWash: lol thanks chris

Mike_Munroe: So, what are we all up to?

BethWash: i found cake

xXGamerChrisXx: Browsing reddit like a nerd XD

ashleeeeey: Listening to Sam's rundown of tomorrow unlike sOmE pEoPlE *coughcoughChris*

EmilyD_: Honestly just packing my final things with Jess. Mike's mostly watching the TV.

xXGamerChrisXx: :-(

.Sam.Giddings.: So, tonight we should all make sure our bags are packed and that we have our passports and tickets ready!! Set your alarms for the right times (depending on your group) and make sure to sleep early too (especially if you're in my group since tomorrow will be an early start for us)!

ashleeeeey: :)

TheOriginalMatt: 5am gang where we AT?

HanButterfly: Beth where are you rn? Because I want some of that cake!!

.Sam.Giddings.: So Team One (myself, Chris, Ash, and Matt), we need to be up by 5:00am and be ready by 5:30am for the taxi to the airport!! Matt and Chris, yours is going to be at Chris' place at 5:24 for some reason so make sure to be ready!!

BethWash: the lodge kitchen bcos where else would there be cake han lol

.Sam.Giddings.: We'll meet up at the airport when we arrive! Once we re-group, we'll check in, probably eat some breakfast whilst we wait, and then catch the 8:30 plane!!

TheOriginalMatt: Sweet!

ashleeeeey: Can't wait! :)

josh_wash: yo matt you surviving the puns

.Sam.Giddings.: Team Two - you guys don't have to be up until around 9:00am since your taxi is at 9:20 and then your plane is at 11:30!

HanButterfly: Josh would you like me to save you some cake before we eat it all? :)

EmilyD_: We'll need a little longer than 20 minutes to all get ready but sure x

TheOriginalMatt: Just about! Myself and Chris have mostly been playing on his PS4 so I've been distracting myself with that! XD

josh_wash: yes please!

josh_wash: i feel for ya bro, a whole evening with chris' puns can prove fatal

josh_wash: you die of cringe

Mike_Munroe: Poor ol' Chris XD

.Sam.Giddings.: Once we arrive and get our bags, we need to catch the 2:30pm train and then the 4:20 bus! After that we have to take the 5:40 bus (I sent you guys screenshots of the route yesterday) and get off at Blackwood Pines ready for our hike up the mountain (with a little help from the cable car, of course)!

xXGamerChrisXx: I'm being BULLIED guys :(

ashleeeeey: Aw, poor Chris! :P

josh_wash: jk XD

TheOriginalMatt: I like how Sam's still here typing all we need to know whilst we're talking about cake and puns XD

.Sam.Giddings.: Team Two, you guys need to catch either the 5:30pm or the 6:00pm train depending on when your stuff arrives. After that you'll need to get the 7:50 bus and then the 8:40 bus to Blackwood Pines (you have to specify you want it to stop there or the driver won't stop) before you head up. Remember to lock the cable car station once you get in, Mike!

josh_wash: oh gosh tHE CAKE

Mike_Munroe: Gotcha' Sam!

HanButterfly: No worries, Josh! I managed to save most of it from Beth!

BethWash: rip my chance at a third slice of cake

_Jess.Riley_: Really, thanks Sam! We're all packed and ready to go! Xx

HanButterfly: It's really going to be such an awesome weekend! I can't wait :D

ashleeeeey: Thank you so much for inviting me! I've never been on something like this before!! :D

TheOriginalMatt: Yeah, thank you so much guys! I can't wait either, Han!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Have we got rooms sorted out for the lodge, guys?

BethWash: ash take the plans away from sam so she can have time to relax lol

EmilyD_: I'm with Mike in the room away from everyone like agreed right x

ashleeeeey: I'm trying but she won't let me! XD

HanButterfly: I mean if needs be we can sort out rooms once we're here! If not maybe we just sort out the first night rooms since it'll be fairly late when everyone arrives and then we can adjust them as needed as the trip goes on!

BethWash: lol poor sam will be up all night organising at this rate

.Sam.Giddings.: Sounds good, Han!

Mike_Munroe: Great idea, Hannah!

BethWash: em, yours and mike's room (upstairs guest) may not be ready first night so is it possible for you to share a room with jess til we get a chance to sort it out tomorrow?

EmilyD_: That's fine, hon. Thank you again for the trip and for letting us use the upstairs guest room x

josh_wash: how about for the first night emily and jess share beth's room and then beth sam and han go in hannah's room

josh_wash: mike can go to the small room downstairs if he's alright w/ that and matt can room w/ me

xXGamerChrisXx: Yo dude you forgot ash

ashleeeeey: It's alright, Chris! I can find somewhere!

EmilyD_: Ash you're honestly lovely but I'd kinda' like to be with either Jess or Mike if that's alright xx

ashleeeeey: No problem, Emily! I wouldn't want to intrude! :)

EmilyD_: Knew you'd understand xx

josh_wash: why dont you and ash share a room cochise

xXGamerChrisXx: I thought I was rooming with you and matt?

josh_wash: bro please just think for a minute here

ashleeeeey: I'm not sure.

xXGamerChrisXx: Beth, han, and sam, is there any room with you guys?

ashleeeeey: I'm really sorry to be a bother!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Of course you can room with us, Ash! We'd love to have you with us! :)

BethWash: im with sam

HanButterfly: Of course!!

xXGamerChrisXx: Thank you to the only valid washington kids right now!

josh_wash: -_-

xXGamerChrisXx: I see what you're doing, josh. ha ha, we've had our laugh, now please stop before this weekend.

Mike_Munroe: Rough subject, huh?

josh_wash: bro chill you know i was just joking

ashleeeeey: I'm really sorry!! Please don't get upset with each other!

xXGamerChrisXx: No ash it's alright! i promise i'm not actually mad! :-)

josh_wash: he acts mad over text to get his point across but he literally just sits there with a blank expression irl XD

TheOriginalMatt: Is Sam still there, Ash? Haven't heard from her in a while!

TheOriginalMatt: Gotta check up on my plane buddy for tomorrow!!

_Jess.Riley_: Did you guys get window seats or middle isle seats? I got a middle isle and the others got a window!

BethWash: she hasn't drowned in her notes has she lol

TheOriginalMatt: We got two sets of window seats! Though I don't know which of us is actually going to be at the window and which one will be window isle!

ashleeeeey: She's just brushing her teeth! Her mom came in and brought us a load of vegan snacks for the trip tomorrow and now I'm even more excited!!

ashleeeeey: Speaking of which, I'm probably going to head to sleep in a minute! Though I'm not sure how much I'll actually get since I'm so excited!!! :)

xXGamerChrisXx: Sleep well, ash. see you in the morning :-)

ashleeeeey: Night, Chris :)

ashleeeeey has left the chat.

_Jess.Riley_: Well that was cute!

xXGamerChrisXx: People say goodnight to eachother! that's a normal human interaction!

_Jess.Riley_: You know full well it's cute when it's you two

.Sam.Giddings.: Ash told me she logged out so I came to say goodnight!

josh_wash: w/ jess on this one bro

HanButterfly: Goodnight, Sam!

BethWash: night sam!

josh_wash: dont let the bedbugs bite!

TheOriginalMatt: See you bright and early tomorrow!!

.Sam.Giddings.: See you at the airport/lodge, guys!

xXGamerChrisXx: Night!

.Sam.Giddings. has left the chat.

BethWash: its cute because you like eachother chris

xXGamerChrisXx has left the chat.

HanButterfly: Aww, don't tease the poor guy!

TheOriginalMatt: Chris says goodnight, as do I! Can't wait to see you all tomorrow!

BethWash: night guys!

TheOriginalMatt has left the chat.

josh_wash: night!

Mike_Munroe: Make sure to save me a slice of that cake, Han! I gtg!

Mike_Munroe has left the chat.

HanButterfly: Goodnight Mike :)

EmilyD_: We'd best be off too. See you all in the morning.

_Jess.Riley_: Night x

EmilyD_ has left the chat.

BethWash: night

HanButterfly: Goodnight x

josh_wash: night xxxxxxyzqvp

_Jess.Riley_: Ha ha, very funny. Get that one from Chris?

josh_wash: lol night

_Jess.Riley_ has left the chat.

BethWash: PLEASE can i have some more cake, han?

josh_wash: you guys can literally just talk if you wanted

HanButterfly: Nope! Gotta' save some for Mike~

BethWash: you wont shut up about that for the rest of the evening now, will you?

BethWash: lol

HanButterfly: :P

josh_wash: you guys gossip in the kitchen

josh_wash: imma head to bed

BethWash: night bro

HanButterfly: Sleep well!

josh_wash has left the chat.

BethWash: please?

HanButterfly: No :P

BethWash: ugh night sis

HanButterfly: Night, Beth! XD

BethWash has left the chat.

HanButterfly has left the chat.

[gabrielitas]

phew it's good to know i'm boy the only one super behind lmao

alright answering questions and asking some more because i have a funny little group of questions that mean nothing but i like to ask

alright so i do bias soonyoung 🙄🙄 didn't think you'd guess so early. i also like seokmin and minghao 🥴🤤 aLSO, WHY HAS SEUNGCHEOL BEEN LOOKING SO CUTE RECENTLY I CANT HANDLE 😩😩

outside of kpop i may or may not have had an emo phase (read: fall out boy, panic!at the disco, my chemical romance). i may or may not still listen emo music. i also LOVE CONAN GRAYYY. idk if he's still indie but i love indie too! probably one of my favorite genres though is classical (instrumental if you wanna get technical 🙄 been yelled at bc cLaSsiCaL iS a TiMe PeRiOd)

the best of us had emo phases ☝️ mine is a little longer lasting three years in middle school. due to this, fall out boy is one of my favorite artists! i’m also a big tchaikovsky fan, and i like doja cat a lot too!

in response to your question about 1518 strasbourg, this is when and where the dancing plague of 1518 happened dnsbsbshja. it's where the phrase "dance till you die" originated lmao. i think it'd be funny to witness this/take part in it. aside from that, id probably fuck with california in 1849 because the gold rush🧎‍♀️, france in the 1880s, or america in the 1980/1990s! i’m a history nerd courtesy of my father, so i choose all my time periods based off some of my favorite historical events! 1880s for architecture mostly, gold rush because lawlessness and the "wild west", and the 80s for the cold war :)

the night is beautiful if you take the time to live it. for me, my favorite time across the board is lunch time-12:00 ish to 3:00 just because the sun is highest and i feel happiest! i like the night when i go out on bike rides because i feel alive/ like i’m not wasting my teen years

GIRL IM NORTHEAST US TOO DJNSBSBSVABWB #goals lmao

i have 1 sister and she's super annoying🙄 i also have 2 cats and a dog (i consider them my siblings)

the most recent show i binged and finished was criminal minds, and i tried supernatural but it's just so bad i cant get past season 11. i’m working on hannibal right now!

the last book i really enjoyed was the summer i turned pretty! i’m a sucker for romance books 😩

questions i've got:

- do you have any siblings or pets?

- do you play any instruments?

- what's your favorite font?

- how many pillows and stuffed animals do you sleep with? (i have too many to count)

- would you rather live in an urban, suburban, or rural setting?

I FRIKIN KNEW U BIASED SOONYOUNG UR VIBES R SO HORANGHE I COULD JUST TELL and i gotta say ur the second person who’s had both minghao and soonyoung on ur bias list and i just find that so funny cuz they’re polar opposites to me (also u have impeccable taste with minghao that boy is my ult and has my whole heart) AND OMG RIGHT??? seungcheol needs to *CHILL*😤

omg yes conan gray😫 this is gonna sound whiny but heather was one of my favorite songs of his before it became a tiktok trend💅

and yes the best of us *did* have emo phases, mine lasted from late 8th grade into the first half of freshman year, so it was kinda short lived but it still happened lol

also, seeing tchaikovsky and doja cat next to each other in a sentence is so funny (but in a weird way i get it lol) i’m not the *biggest* classical/instrumental fan, but i have def used it as study music when songs with lyrics r just too distracting. back to doja tho!! have u listened to her new album?? do u have a fav song off of it? (i haven’t listened to all of it but i do have a couple that i rlly like)

omg how did i not recognize that u were talking abt the dancing plague!!!!!🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ idk if u watch buzzfeed unsolved or watcher but they have a series called puppet history and the episode on the dancing plague is one of my favorites! also omg yes another history nerd who knows abt history b/c of her dad!!!! i’m prob most knowledgeable abt wwii, the civil rights movement in the us, and the spanish civil war cuz those r my dads main interests and i was sat down in front of documentaries abt those topics at the age of like, 3 lol. and wanting to experience the wild west is such a perfect and iconic era to want to live in, and wanting to experience the cold war is so funny (b/c i’m sure the ppl who were living it without knowing the ending like us felt the exact opposite lol)

and yes the night is so beautiful when u just give it ur attention. like, on my birthday it was raining and i didn’t have school the next day (and my birthdays i’m may so it was pretty warm) so i just went outside at like, midnight ish and listened to the rain and crocheted and it was truly so nice 😫 also omg last year when covid had us all at home i went for a bike ride almost every day after school to just get out of my room and it was so nice!! it was my bike from when i was like, 12 but i’m 4’11 so i was still able to ride it without a problem lsnsksns

and yes pets r absolutely siblings, my cat prob acts more like s typical sibling than my two younger siblings do lsnsksns (srsly tho my cat is an asshole she fucked up my leg the other day cuz i gave her food late smh)

omg hun season 11?? how many seasons of that goddamn show r there??? i couldn’t get past episode 1😭 (i rlly only started watching it b/c of dean from gilmore girls sksnksns) the show i’m currently bingeing rn tho is downton abbey, as i’m sure u can tell from how much downton shit u had to scroll past to find my answer to ur last ask alskkskjsjs (i’m so so sorry 😭)

ooo that sounds like a rlly good book title, what was it abt? i just finished a secret history (which FUCKED ME UP MY GOD THERES A LOT OF MURDER) and i’m currently working on the sequel to my name is asher lev by chaim potok (who is one of my fav jewish/classic literature authors and also just a rlly good author in general)

for ur questions:

-yes i do have siblings! two younger (one four and a half years younger and one a little over nine years younger than me so i’m the oldest by quite a bit lol) and i do have a pet! my cat sweetie who is an asshole who i love very much

-i took piano for like a year in second grade but then third grade happened and i was rlly bad at math so my parents switched from paying for piano lessons to paying for math tutoring lessons and i now remember literally nothing from piano lessons sksnksns

-i,,, dont think i have a favorite font? i do like to write in cursive and have a collection of calligraphy pens that i bust out on special occasions so there’s that i guess lol

-ok i have two normal pillows, one chair/armrest/pillow thing (idk if that makes sense but that’s the only way i know how to describe it sksnksns), a body pillow, and a single stuffed bear that live on my bed

-ooo so this is difficult for me cuz i technically live in a suburb but we’re *right next* to a major city in my state (like i’m a 20ish min car ride from my states baseball stadium and a 20 min walk to the college of the major city) so this has kinda made me rlly like both? like, i like the quiet of the suburbs but i cant handle not being able to walk to the closest boba shop or movie theatre or bookshop but i also don’t rlly love the noise and lights that there are in the city at night. so idk sksnksns

what do u like more tho? the city or the suburbs? also since u asked the question i’m assuming u have a fav form and i’m now rlly interested in finding out what it is lol

goodnight!❤️ (or good morning if ur seeing this in the morning since i’m answering this at midnight lol)

[free--therapy]

Hello it's 🌼 anon and thank you SO MUCH for your response to my ask. Honestly it set things straight a lot.

I tried distancing myself from the situation and all the overthinking and it helped me a lot. Staying away from the overthinking definitely helped me see things clearly and as you said, I'm overthinking way too much.

And yes i agree that even if i were to go to the police for a reason like this, they'd surely laugh it off honestly lol

I say this because i remember when i was worrying about me stealing like $3 or something a few times as a 13 year old from a relative and i shared this with my therapist (and i have shared this with u too some time ago) and i told her how if i should be going to the police and back then too, she smiled and gave me the same reply. For a reason so small and something that many people do growing up, i was just overthinking and jumping to extreme solutions unnecessarily and im doing the same now. Honestly i feel like I'm just scared of the idea of "doing something too wrong" because as you mentioned, most of these silly things that I've been worrying about are things i've done that until the age of like nineteen (basically just until two years ago) and i believe i should be kind to myself enough to let myself believe that i was (and am) still just growing and i didn't know or think if these things could be "wrong" or against the law or anything like that.

almost always it's went like, i search for something but something else comes up and i get curious and i search it but it turns out to be something weird or something I've never seen before or I'm not used to. But then with time, seeing people in the comment sections of these types of contents ends up making me desensitized to it and since i was exposed to this stuff when i was still a teenager, i never questioned the "morality" of it which is what i continued until recently when i started questioning myself a little too much

But now that i saw this from a third person pov, i can clearly see how much im stretching this out and catastrophisizing and burdening myself with things that i definitely don't need to think so much about. And i realized so many people i know who watch anime have consumed that sort of content some time and it's just not practical to think something like "oh do i deserve to go to the police because of this?" or something when there are so many people who've done it too but don't think about it too much

i read something which definitely helped me understand this reality better. there was this case where a celebrity got into some scandal about distributing some nsfw videos which had real people in it and since distributing p*rn of any type is illegal in my country, that celebrity got into legal trouble but ended up getting bailed. and that's when i realized that I've never seen or heard any sorts of legal cases where a person has been caught for looking at some content online. It's just not something that's taken that seriously even if there are laws for it. As you said, it's a grey area and there are other illegal sort of things that are given much more importance

Basically i realized that not everything is so idealistic and i don't have to believe that mindset either. These things can happen unknowingly or without realizing because they're so small situations that most people don't even talk about and so, people end up consuming such stuff before they even know what they're doing. Or even if they know, it's not something that's consumed with a serious notion but more of a "its just a manga" sort of a thing. so i have to learn to let go of that idea of trying to keep myself "perfect" in that sense or to feel like i need to have "neat, clean, perfect morals"

By no means am i saying that doing wrong things is okay but what i mean is it's important to see the reality and instead of trying so hard to be idealistic, it's just more realistic to remember that these sorts of things are very small and very common among people too...even by standards of the law this is just a grey area and not something that's as serious as I'm thinking it to be so I'm just overthinking too much.

And this applies to most areas that i keep overthinking about. most of the things i used to overthink about are things that are really small and not serious enough but i catastrophisize because i get anxious about it like "omg does this make me a bad person?" Or "is this is a crime?" Or something. But i realise this is just a flawed or disordered way of thinking because it just leads to me spiralling when its not needed and i even end up jumping to extreme conclusions like "does this mean I'm a weird person?" Or "do i not deserve to be treated nicely because i did this?" etc. which again is just me following that flawed thinking pattern

I'm definitely gonna remember to respect myself and believe that i deserve to be treated with respect too and remember that stuff like what i watched or what mistakes i made don't make me any less deserving of respect or love or anything unlike what the anxiety makes me think. And this will start from me being more kind and understanding of myself and allowing myself room to grow while making mistakes without beating myself up so much for it especially for things from the past

Thank you again for answering! It helped me a ton and i could see things more clearly even more because of your response. thank you for being so kind 💗

Hey Anon 🌼

We learn by making mistakes and a lot of the time we're not even aware they are mistakes until much later. It's normal and happens to all of us. Of course we'll feel guilty when we found out something we've done before can be considered illegal or wrong, but we should be using those opportunities to educate ourselves to make sure we don't repeat them again in the future. A lot of the time, people let go with warnings whenever they break the law because they genuinely did not know that something was law or if something was deemed "wrong". Again, this has to deal with forgiving yourself for not knowing what you don't know because that is life. We can't and will never know everything and we have to be okay with that. We just have to make sure we strive to do better when we learn better. It's impossible to be perfect and that's something a lot of people need to come to terms with because perfection is just a concept that no one can attain.

It's very easy to spend so much of our time evaluating ourselves based on our past actions, but as long as you're learning from those mistakes and are a completely different person today than you were back then, then you're growing. We're all going to continue to make new mistakes too, again because there is just soooo much out there that we don't know. We can only hope that we don't learn these lessons the hard way and that we're able to catch onto things quickly. Mistakes make and shape the person we are today and that's okay. No one has never not made a mistake and everyone has something they are ashamed of to share. It's what makes us all a lot more alike than we think or know.

I love that, anon! Please do remember to love and respect yourself in this journey of yours, you absolutely deserve it. Hope you have a lovely week 😊