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Beginning to really wonder how much of my financial concern is manufactured and handed to me as opposed to something I'm genuinely concerned by
#bc like. i'm getting by just fine. i don't have anything to be reasonably worried about#but also when i was a kid my father would break down my mother's paycheck and basically explain how broke we were#and that May Have Affected Me Somewhat#as well as just. the way you consistently see the advice to just save! don't get takeout! necessities! and i'm not intent on living like#a monk nor am i intent on being on that grindset for financial gain#it's like i don't intrinsically care but i have so many messages given to me about how i need to care a lot and it puts me in a weird spot#i am simultaneously standing still and moving at mach speeds#i mean right now i just need a safety net while in between jobs; after that i need to save up to move out of state bc the uh#political situation and upcoming presidential election don't seem very sustainable for someone like me anymore#they weren't to begin with but i don't wanna stick around to see how bad it's gonna get#but it's like. okay and then what? save for what? going back to school i guess? idk#i feel like i keep asking myself what i'm trying to accomplish and keep trying to force myself to have answers#here and now when i have to be okay with taking things one step at a time instead of having everything here and now#it's simultaneously fine and terrible and i am holding two conflicting yet equal truths#i feel i may have a clearer head once i leave my current job. i'm trying to look but nothing feels appealing given how#burnt out i already feel. i dread going back into my workplace and i fear it's showing to the patients and i don't want that#i want a month off to rediscover who i am as a person outside of getting yelled at in retail and then pick something back up#could be feasible. genuinely could be. i need to sort out the health insurance aspect but. that's lowkey the plan?#to construct a financial safety net and then slam on the breaks for a while; see if i can strike up a deal with the staff about me#coming in for specific tasks bc we already know i'm quick and efficient with the inventory so i do have a little leverage#you know what. this is getting some of it off my chest and i'm starting to feel confident again lmao#i won't be doing weekends starting either next week or the week after so that's a start! i just think i want everything done right now#bc i'm afraid i won't have the chance again but i will. i definitely will#i just need to let myself get to that point; it's just the immense drain from the register work and the Everything that comes with retail#also having to accept that it's okay to leave this; there's not something wrong with me like. ''not being able to handle it'' or w/e#no mindfulness or detachment could've saved me; it was shit and i'm hitting the bricks and that's all there is to it#i've been thinking a lot about it all lately bc it's what's most prominent in my life rn of course#idk. pondering. introspecting. as i am wont to do#anyways if you've read all this you're a real mvp and i am kissing you on the hand#shai speaks
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Some recent pressed leaves and stuff to add to the collection :0
#LOV giant nasturtium leaves#and they press weirdly thin like when they dry out it's almost like a super super fragile sheet of tracing paper or something#I also just really enjoy collecting textures and patterns and stuff. like it's not really about them looking pretty but more just#something notable. like the cool dotted pattern or the stripey veiny looking one#I have so much I want to get done by the end of the year but have been so unproductive still lol ToT#I've had new costumes and like Actual Stuff To Post for probably 2 months now but they just sit in a folder and I forget about#them and like walk in circles talking to myself all day instead or something hhh#I think it's the classic cycle of like 'I am too stressed to be productive > the fact that i'm not being productive stresses me out > i am#even more stressed and no more productive > being unproductive stresses me out > so on and so forth forever' lol#or the 'I have so many goals in life and so much motivation and so many things I love and want to do > there are too many things to do#at once and it's overwhelming > do none of them instead' cycle lol#I think my main focuses in the new year though are to finally finish the worldbuilding slideshow. Do more costumes. And do more sculptures#since I haven't done a lot of those in a while. And still work on my games and short stories and stuff that takes place in my worldbuilding#world but those are more difficult longterm tasks so I think they should be like. not the MAIN main focus or else I'll never feel like I do#anything. I think that was the problem for the past while is that the things I had delegated as my Main Focuses That Go Above All Else#are so long and difficult and tedious that you never feel like you're making progress so it's like you're ignoring all the other stuff you#could be doing in favor of a thing that feels like you're not doing anything thus you get a chronic feeling of never finishing anything ever#Whereas like. I can do a sculpture in a day or two. and I can do costumes in a day or less. Having a steadier flow of Small Things i can fee#l like I'm actually accomplishing will maybe help it not just be like 'okay I spent a whole day doing somehting and have nothing tangible to#show for it because it's just text in a word document that probably nothing will ever even come of because it will take me years to finish'#The biggest insurmountable task at the moment is the worldbuilding slideshow but I am chugging through.. slowly lol.. It takes me about#2 hours to read 25 slides (they're not bullet points it's like little paragraphs on each slide). and I have about 800 to go. so thats..#naur.. i shant even calculate it... plus editing one hour of vidoe usually takes about 2 hours so you double it. if I have that much recordi#ng of me reading slides to edit. then turning them all into a final video should take.... i cannot say. i shall not think of it#And I've just had a very stressful few weeks HOWEVER I just always like tp start the new year with stuff cleared like.. all of my messages I#haven't answered in 3+ weeks responded to. all of my emails to my doctors checked. house cleaned and organized. photos cleared and organized#off of the computer. everyting backed up in some sort of physical storage. clear out drafts. rewrite all of my main todo lists. decide prio#rities and yearly/monthly/weekly goals. consider the trajectory of my life and what I need to do. etc. etc. So I feel like I don't have any#time to waste and can't rest. yet.. alas.. It doesn't help that I feel sick out of nowehre like 50% of the time#I know some poeple can work/focus on tasks with body aches and etc. but my brain is just always like 'No. :)' .. grrrbb
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my new favorite position to put myself on at work is ""support"" in which I run around the floor and get in everyones way. in the aggregate this does help and does reduce times slightly but at what cost (very annoying to everyone else)
#I've decided i care abt drive through times#i didnt care at all before but I've decided i care now#our goal is 55 seconds otw which i think stands for order-to-window#this is an ABSURDLY low goal and i believe the only way to accomplish it is to have four people over there#two to take/hand out orders and two for drive bar only#i need four people whose sole task is to serve the drive through. this is an obscene amount of coverage#but i believe it is the only way#one of those four people is me and i run around and marginally speed up each station#i havent had the chance to try this deployment tho bc my store manager wont let me run weekday peaks yet which is rude.#i took next week off and then i think i get weekday peaks for myself the week after tho
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i am getting started on productivity for the night but haven't figured out yet if i want to write or art first and there's also the tiny part of my brain that just wants to stare at kabru until it is ok to stop staring at kabru
#i don't talk about fandom stuff much here since i don't really get involved with it#but i do fixate on characters and right now i am circling around him like a wolf#tempted to draw him too but i can never capture his big beautiful eyes properly#i've also been tempted to draw beefcake laios but UHHhh thats for another day and i dont know if i will share that LOL#i finished the manga but i haven't had the energy to watch more of the show so i'm just thinking about the characters on my own and going :#also contemplating if i should draw a pride pfp (unrelated)#basically there is so much to do and it is overwhelming to work through the list#and i keep wanting to add more to it#also need to promo my commissions again more and add those sketches still but trying to figure out how to price them and don't have the#energy to type up explanations for them yet blagh#and i'm trying to balance that “realistically- i need more income coming in” with also “but i can't overwhelm myself with tasks”#<- which is very unambiguously clear that i do that just fine even without working on things for other people#is it obvious that my therapist relocated and i haven't been given a new one yet.#i can therapize myself So Good (actually overthinking and spiraling)#<- but please do not worry this is actually not a bad spiral which is good it is just a “things to do” spiral but it is fortunately#missing the key component of doom and horror and the world ending because i did not accomplish everything right#which is what a bad spiral contains and i've actually been on a pretty good streak avoiding those lately in spite of circumstances!#but if i linger on it it will probably turn into a lie so i will stop doing that#speaking of shows i watched the new episode of kaiju no. 8 today and i am just aggghrrhekrjskfj#i love hoshina so much#and he's been getting a lot of focus in these episodes so im happy#i love the way they animate his fights like!! wow#i need to watch them all on sakugabooru later#but i can't tonight if i want to do things#but i will later because they deserve frame-by-frameing#also i'm going to go pick up two volumes of wind breaker tomorrow i think#unfortunately i ordered them before i learned my hours were getting cut but#i have enough to cover my bills this month and since i'm not buying lunches or dinner for myself anymore because i'm not leaving the house#i'd rather just get them now instead of worrying about someone else buying them if i take too long#and let that be my last personal purchase for awhile
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The “Ba” in “Baja”
Rise Ramblings #628
Mikey and Leo. Baja Blast. The Tide Pod Duo. Although this duo has limited dedicated screen time, they are an absolute joy to watch. First and foremost, you can’t help but notice how Leo does nothing but try to protect the little bean.
He’ll bend over backwards just to keep his baby brother safe.
Leo will also offer emotional support in very dire times.
It’s just so nice to see them together. Plus, you can tell that Leo loves Mikey to pieces.
Even when Leo’s being annoying.
All of these traits are expected from big brother Leo. However, it’s the other side of this relationship that I find intriguing.
Let’s discuss Mikey and how he interacts with the blue one.
I’ve summarized my thoughts about Mikey’s half of their relationship into two parts: “Emulate” & “Outdo.”
As the youngest of the four, it’s natural for Michelangelo to look up to his older brothers. Yet, throughout the show, I believe that Mikey seems to emulate Leo the most.
This thought leads directly into the “Outdo” portion of my hypothesis.
I've noticed that a competitive streak emerges in Mikey when Leo is in the picture, a streak that I cannot say I’ve seen him express with any of his other brothers, April, or even their rivals. It’s unique just to Leo.
It’s almost as if there is some driving force within Mikey that wants to prove something to Leon.
When it comes to Leo, Mikey is suddenly determined to see who’s the strongest, best, or fastest between them.
(I compiled all of the Air Hockey scenes from the episode, “Mrs. Cuddles”)
The most compelling aspect of their relationship is that this competitive streak seems to be one-sided, at least initially. It's almost as if Leo feels like he doesn't have to prove anything to Angelo.
Eventually, though, Mikey goads Leo into competing with him, and Leo gives in if not but to defend his title, satiate Orange, and give his antagonizer what he’s looking for. (It’s a “you mess with the bull, you get the horns” type of thing.)
Why does this dynamic exist? Who’s to say. But I believe that the dissonance between these two comes from Leo seeing their relationship as “Protector – Protectee” while Mikey sees Leo as a rival, or more specifically, Leo is the goalpost that Michelangelo has tasked himself with surpassing.
In my opinion, the concept of Mikey seeing Leo’s accomplishments as something he needs to “Emulate” & “Outdo” is a compliment in it’s simplest form. Mikey thinks that Leo is so great and awesome that he wants to be just as awesome, and even better than the brother he respects and looks up to so much.
…Or maybe Mikey just wants to knock Leo down a peg or two.
I can’t say that I’d blame him.
Also, do you know why Mikey is the “Ba” in “Baja?”
Because Leo is the "Jajajajajajaja" *laughs in Spanish*
All right. I’m done.
#starkiss ramblings#rise analysis#rottmnt analysis#character analysis#Michelangelo Ramblings#rise mikey#rise michelangelo#mikey#michelangelo#rottmnt michelangelo#michelangelo hamato#rise leo#rise leonardo#leonardo#rottmnt leonardo#rottmnt#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#tmnt2018#tmnt 2k18#tmnt 2018#save rottmnt#unpause rottmnt#unpause rise of the tmnt#save rise of the tmnt#save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles
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Hi! I noticed that your requests were open and I love the way you write Malleus so I was hoping you would do yandere malleus x reader. where the reader knows twisted wonderland is a game (but not imposter au pls) and after they got isekia'd are trying to stop the overblots from happening and malleus is just terrified for them. Idk just an idea I've had for awhile but never found a fanfic like lol. Obviously it's totally fine if you don't want to do it or if I accidentally broke a rule. Anyway remember to drink some water and take a break if needed! Have a amazing rest of your day/night!!
Warning: Yandere (not really, not at all). Gender-neutral reader.
Characters: Malleus Draconia.
Summary: MC sees affection meters and it's not good.
Note: These are mainly thoughts and random words my mind spewed out.
How did one claim victory at a game? Well, it entirely depended on the game, the mechanics and the options. It should've been impossible to lose a mobile game that was primarily composed of the gacha mechanism and visual novels.
When you suddenly found yourself in the series of twisted villains in a prestigious school of magic, you found that it was much more complex than it appeared on screen. Especially when only you could see these small bars occasionally floating above people's heads. Bars which you recognized as affection meters, nearly all of them stagnant at a dull gray 0% when you first arrived. This was the hurdle blocking your way to an easy victory. Because how else were you to escape the game, other than complete it?
Situations became messier, when you didn't have a dialogue options between two mere choices. Add making good impressions and keeping a character's favor, to the list of quests alongside avoiding death by inky overblotted characters. By some miracle, you had increased the affection of the characters you met and interacted with to a healthy 5% or 10%, sometimes more. At any cost you wished to avoid getting in the negatives, because you did not want to find out what would happen then.
Sometimes, the numbers would drop dangerously close to zero, mainly when an overblot was occuring. Never had you realized how the visual novel failed spectacularly at portraying the utter horror of the overblotted in all their wicked glory. The black inky darkness leaking from them like tears or blood with those crazed unhinged looks in their eyes–– was the stuff of pure nightmares.
And yet the one whose overblot you had been dreading the most, the dorm leader of Diasomnia, was surprisingly docile as you dealt with others. However, you knew even when conversing with him, that you would one day witness him overblot and look like some ethereal but deadly fallen angel. So mentally you prepared yourself, while taking on the task of keeping up appearances.
Malleus' affection meter, was a good 20% and a friendly pink shade, quite the accomplishment you were proud of, considering the majority of the cast wasn't even at 15%. The Draconia heir was certainly someone you never wanted to see reach below zero, so you did your absolute best to appeal to him, even if he was quite intimidating at first with the way he stoically watched you complain about the least of your worries, homework and classes.
By the time you spoke to him about your troubles with the Ramshackle dorm and Azul, during what you knew was the Octavinelle arc, the prince's affection had sprouted to a 22%. When you went into more detail of the potential loss you could face, it went to 23%.
The next time you saw him, you were weary and antsy since witnessing Azul's break-down. If the blot of his tears had the magic to gather, it would've been enough to drown, you were sure of it. Even by that maniac look in his eyes, you're sure he would've purposely drowned you if he got close enough.
Throughout that charlatan's chapter, his affection meter had slowly been rising, dropping during the overblot like the tides only to rise once again by the end to a good 45%. This was good!
But no matter how much you may have pondered, strategized, or try to predict each next action, you could've never guessed that the next time you saw Malleus after Azul's overblot, his expression taut with concern, his affection meter had made a jump to 55% and turned red. This entire time you had been avoiding the negatives, but you never once worried of the dangers and implications a red affection meter above 50% would mean for you. Or heaven forbid, anything close to 100%.
#twisted wonderland#twst#yandere twisted wonderland x reader#yandere twisted wonderland#yandere twst#malleus draconia#twst malleus#yandere malleus draconia
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The thing about feeling exhausted all the time is that it is exhausting.
#personal tag#i've only had the energy to accomplish like 3 tasks today#i don't know what it is. it can't be lack of sleep because i'm sleeping more than usual if anything#is it depression? is it the result of my ocd having been particularly bad lately?#i have no idea all i know is i'm tired#and i've been tired for... idk a long while now#i'm hoping to get a fanfic finished for nye because i've written one on that day for two years in a row might as well do it again#but i barely feel up to writing anything so i've been really struggling with it
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I’d like to point out this man’s insane hotness🥵
Also… imagine needing a place to sit and Bucky tells you to sit on his lap😍
I've been sitting on this one for ages, Shannon, I'm sorry! But I was waiting for a storyline that truly swept me away because this look and the potential for this moment couldn't be squandered if I was going to take a stab at it...
Poison Blood from the Wound of the Pricked Hand
Characters/Pairings: Post TFATWS!Bucky x curvy!Millennial Female!Reader Word Count: 3k Summary: You've made a life-altering decision, and even though it feels like the only choice you could have made, you hope it's the right one, and you hope the man you're being forced to rely on tonight will help you accomplish what you need to, or else your life could be at stake - not to mention the safety of so many others.
Content/Warnings: intense physical intimicy, but no actual smut (I know, shocker)
Author Notes: Possibly the last piece for the Deliciously Debauched Labor Day Weekend! And, yes late, but the final piece to complete out my collection for @buckybarnesevents Hot Bucky Summer - week twelve "what should I wear?"
↠ Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest
“How are things going in there?” Bucky called loudly to you.
“Um…” There was a long pause, before you called back, “Fine.”
You glanced at the clock.
You knew at this rate you were going to make the two of you late. But that only ate at you more. You weren’t trying to cause problems.
Or, rather, you weren’t trying to cause more problems. You already felt like a walking liability.
All you had tried to do was get out of the danger of your brother’s organization.
You had finally gone to the authorities, looking to make some kind of deal for safety, maybe witness protection, you didn’t know exactly how these things worked, only that you had to leave.
But evidently things had been even worse and more complicated than you knew, and the price for safety had come with strings.
They needed more information, and they saw you as a means to be able to get it.
And so they’d dangled a deal that required you to play your part as a trusted member of the family one more time.
You had only been gone for just over twenty-four hours, so it wasn’t likely that your brother would suspect your defection yet. But it was so recent that you still felt unsettled over whether you’d made the right decision - especially now that it wasn’t a clean break and you were being used be the people you expected to be the good guys.
“Are you sure?” Bucky’s voice broke through your thoughts again.
You shook your head. Since he was in the other room, there was no danger in him seeing your doubt and uncertainty.
Of all the moving parts in this scheme, Bucky was possibly the only piece you thought you might be able to trust. His reputation preceded him as someone more than capable of handling any dangerous situation, but he also seemed to harbor a question in his mind over working this operation and trusting the government agencies who had a hand in this.
You sighed, then bit your lip. The clock ticked relentlessly, each second a reminder of your indecision. Your eyes darted between two outfits laid out on the bed, both chosen with care but now seeming woefully inadequate for the task ahead.
You sighed, your eyes darting between the two outfits laid out on the bed. One was a sleek black dress, form-fitting and elegant, with a high neckline and long sleeves that would conceal the nervous goosebumps prickling your skin. The other, a tailored pantsuit in deep navy, exuded an air of professionalism and confidence you wished you felt.
Both outfits were carefully chosen to blend in at the high-stakes charity gala where you'd be making your reappearance in your brother's world. But which one would better sell the lie? Which one would make you look like you hadn't just betrayed everything you'd ever known?
You ran your fingers over the cool silk of the dress, then the crisp wool of the suit jacket. The clock's incessant ticking seemed to grow louder with each passing moment, mocking your indecision.
You needed to look like your old self, the trusted sister, and you’d worn clothes just like these a hundred times before. But now?
And with the added caveat of needing to have a brand new man on your arm and sell that he was a valid new part of your life, too?
You grabbed both hangers and went out into the living room of your apartment where Bucky had been patiently waiting for you.
Bucky's eyes widened slightly as you emerged from the bedroom, clothes in hand. He was sitting on the couch, hands in his lap, already dressed in a sharp looking suit with leather lapels - edgy but impressive. For a moment, you were struck by how different he looked from the dangerous operative turned superhero you knew him to be. He looked like he could effortlessly blend into the opulent setting you expected tonight.
"I can't decide," you admitted, your voice hesitant. "Which one do you think would be more… convincing?"
Bucky's gaze flickered between the two outfits, then back to your face. His expression softened, and you saw a glimmer of understanding in his eyes.
"The dress," he said after a moment. "It's more in line with what you'd typically wear to these events, right? We don't want to raise any suspicions by changing your style too drastically."
You nodded, grateful for his insight. "You're right. Thank you."
As you turned to go back to the bedroom, Bucky's voice stopped you. "Hey," he said softly, his blue eyes searching your face. "We don't have to do this if you're not ready."
For a moment, you were tempted to take the out he was offering. To tell him you couldn't go through with it, that you'd made a mistake. But then you thought of your brother, of all the people he'd hurt, and you steeled yourself.
"No, I can do this. Besides,” you thought of all the things you’d learned in different meetings and conversations and reports today, “this is our best chance to get the information we need to bring him and the rest of the organization down.”
“But it doesn’t have to be you,” he insisted.
You tilted your head and smiled sadly. “But it should be.” They had been planning to try and infiltrate tonight’s gala before you had presented yourself, but with you, you were practically a golden ticket into the event and into so many more of the areas once inside.
Bucky nodded, a mix of admiration and concern in his eyes. "Alright. But remember, I'll be right there with you the whole time. If anything feels off, just give me the signal and we're out of there."
You nodded, grateful for his reassurance. As you headed back to the bedroom to change, you couldn't help but wonder how convincing you and Bucky would be as a couple. You'd only known each other for a day, and while he seemed kind and protective, there was still so much mystery surrounding him.
As you undressed, you tried to calm your racing thoughts. You'd been to countless events like this before, schmoozing with the elite and corrupt. But never as a double agent, never with the weight of so many lives hanging in the balance, and certainly not since discovering the secret that had shattered your world and opened up your eyes to the fact that everything your brother was involved in was corrupt and dangerous.
As you slipped into the black dress, you couldn't help but feel like you were putting on armor for battle. The silk clung to your skin, cool and familiar, yet somehow foreign now. You zipped it up, fingered the neckline, then pressed your hand to your heart and took a deep breath.
In the mirror, you saw the woman you used to be—poised, elegant, the perfect sister to a powerful man. But your eyes betrayed you, filled with a storm of emotions you'd have to learn to hide in the next few minutes.
You applied your makeup with practiced precision, each stroke of mascara and swipe of lipstick another layer of protection, of disguise. Once satisfied with your appearance, you squared your shoulders, and put the lipstick in your clutch.
You emerged from the bedroom, smoothing down the fabric of your dress. “I’m ready.”
Bucky’s eyes roamed over you appreciatively, and you felt something pool in your stomach - the attraction to this man you’d been trying to ignore since you’d been introduced to him early this morning. You could not have a crush on this man who was supposed to infiltrate your brother’s organization with you, steal information, and try and get both of you out safely.
It would be too much of a distraction.
Bucky's lips quirked into a small smile.
“What?” you asked, suspicious.
“You forgot your shoes,” he said simply.
You looked down and sighed.
“Nervous?” he asked, his tone kind, soft.
"Bucky," you said, looking back at him, "how are we supposed to explain your presence? Won't my brother be suspicious of a new man in my life?"
"We've got a cover story. I'm a potential new investor in your brother's 'business ventures.' You met me at a networking event last week and thought I'd be a good fit for tonight's gala."
You raised an eyebrow. "And you just happened to sweep me off my feet?”
"Something like that," Bucky replied with a roguish smile. "We'll keep it vague - a whirlwind romance, sparks flying. Your brother will be more focused on the potential investment than on our relationship."
You nodded, trying to quell the butterflies in your stomach. It wasn't just nerves about the mission now; the idea of pretending to be swept off your feet by Bucky wasn't entirely unpleasant.
"Right," you said, forcing yourself to focus. "I'll just go grab those shoes."
You hurried back to the bedroom, slipping on a pair of elegant black heels. As you turned to leave, your eyes fell on a framed photo on the nightstand - you and your brother at last year's gala, both smiling widely. Your stomach churned. How had you been so blind?
Taking a deep breath, you pushed the guilt down and away. You needed to do this. There was no other path in your mind now that you knew the truth. Your eyes flicked from the frame to the luggage packed next to your door. When you’d left yesterday, you hadn’t taken anything with you, not wanting to draw suspicion. With this return to your place and the cover of being swept into something with Bucky, it gave you the cover to pack some of your things - luggage that was being picked up and taken care of for you by one of this “rich investor’s” staff to go with you on a two-week vacation to a private island in the Phillippines. It was a perfect cover, provided you could sell it.
He was so handsome, with his dark hair styled perfectly and his strong jawline. Still sitting on the couch, he radiated confidence and charm, making it easy to see why he was chosen for this mission. You couldn't help but feel slightly nervous under his intense gaze.
Bucky's eyes flicked over your ensemble. "You look beautiful," he said, his voice low and husky.
Your heart skipped a beat at the compliment, feeling self-conscious under his scrutiny. "Thank you," you replied shyly.
You’d been so worried about all the other logistics of tonight, you hadn’t thought about the believability of you and Bucky until now.
“Come here,” he said, holding a hand out to you. You crossed the room and took it, gasping as he pulled you down to sit across his lap.
“Bucky,” you protested, insecure about sitting all of your plus-sized body in his lap. You had never been comfortable with your few previous partners in this situation, but he pressed one cool vibranium finger to your lips, while his other hand moved softly up and down your back.
“Don’t be nervous,” he whispered. “You’ll need to look comfortable around me when I touch you, and if your brother is going to believe you’ve agreed to go away with me tonight, I can’t touch you for the first time while we’re there.”
You nodded. He pressed a kiss to your shoulder, and you shivered.
You felt a flush creep up your neck as Bucky's lips brushed your cheek. His touch was gentle, almost reverent, but you could feel the strength in his arms as he held you. You took a deep breath, trying to calm yourself further. He seemed unconcerned, even happy to hold all of you, and the contrast between his warm flesh hand and the cool metal of his other arm sent tingles down your spine.
"Is this okay?" he murmured against your skin, his breath hot on your neck.
You nodded, not trusting your voice. Your heart was racing, and you weren't sure if it was from nerves about the mission or the proximity of this dangerously attractive man.
Bucky's hand traced lazy circles on your back, and you found yourself relaxing into his touch despite your better judgment. "We need to look natural together," he explained softly. "Like we can't keep our hands off each other. It'll sell the whirlwind romance angle."
You swallowed hard, trying keep it together.
Bucky's hand continued its soothing motion up and down your back, and you found yourself leaning into his touch despite your better judgment.
"Tell me more about your brother," Bucky said softly. "What should I expect?"
You tensed slightly at the mention of your brother, but Bucky's steady presence kept you grounded. "He's… charming," you began, choosing your words carefully. "Charismatic. He can make anyone feel like the most important person in the room. But there's always an agenda behind it."
Bucky nodded, his fingers still tracing patterns on your back. "And how does he usually react to you bringing someone new around?"
You sighed, leaning your head against Bucky's shoulder. "He's protective. Suspicious. I haven’t brought many men around. He'll probably try to get you alone, size you up."
"I can handle that," Bucky assured you, his voice low and confident.
You lifted your head to look at him, suddenly struck by how close your faces were. His blue eyes were intense, searching yours. "Bucky," you whispered, "what if I can't pull this off?"
His hand came up to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing softly across your skin. "We will," he said firmly. It didn’t escape your notice that he’d said we, not allowing you to feel alone. "You're stronger than you think, and I've got your back.”
You took a deep breath, steeling yourself. "Underneath that charm, he's calculating. Always looking for an angle, a way to use people. And he's dangerous when he feels threatened."
Before, you hadn’t questioned his cold side, thought it to usually be warranted, protective of you and the family and his organization. But now you knew better, illusion shattered.
Bucky nodded, his expression grave. "I'll be on high alert," he assured you. "We'll have to make sure he sees me as an asset, not a threat. But remember, we're not there to confront him tonight. Just to gather information."
"Right," you said, trying to calm your racing heart. "Just information."
Bucky's hand resumed landed on your thigh, and he squeezed reassuringly. You put your hand over his.
"Good," he murmured, eyes dropping down to your coupled hands. "That's the kind of reaction we need."
You nodded, trying to focus on the mission, on the act you needed to sell. But it was becoming increasingly difficult with Bucky's strong arm around you, his warm breath on your neck.
"We should practice," you said, your voice barely above a whisper. "What if... what if we need to kiss?"
Bucky's eyes met yours, a mix of surprise and something darker, more intense. "Are you sure?"
You nodded, your heart racing. "We need to be convincing, right?"
Without another word, Bucky's hand slid to the nape of your neck, pulling you closer. His lips met yours, soft at first, then with growing intensity. You melted into the kiss, your hands instinctively moving to his chest. The stubble on his jaw scratched lightly against your skin, sending shivers down your spine.
For a moment, you forgot about the mission, about your brother, about everything except the feel of Bucky's lips on yours. It felt electric, a spark of something real amidst all the deception you were about to undertake. His metal arm tightened around your waist, and you gasped softly into his mouth.
When you finally broke apart, both slightly breathless, Bucky's eyes were dark with desire. "That was..." he started, then cleared his throat. "That should be convincing enough.”
You nodded, unable to form words. The kiss had felt all too real, and you were struggling to remind yourself that this was just part of the act. You couldn't afford to develop real feelings for Bucky, not with everything at stake.
"We should go," you managed to say, glancing at the clock. "We don't want to be late."
Bucky nodded, but neither of you moved.
Then you leaned in and kissed him again. He returned your kiss, metal arm pulling you even closer. Your hands tangled into his hair, and you shifted in his lap so you could press your chest flush against his.
"We really should go," you murmured against Bucky's lips when you had to break off for another breath, but made no move to pull away.
He hummed in agreement, his fingers tangling in your hair as he deepened the kiss. You melted into him, all thoughts of the mission momentarily forgotten. There was only the warmth of his body, the softness of his lips, the gentle scrape of his stubble against your skin.
Your hands roamed over his broad shoulders, feeling the strength coiled beneath his suit jacket. Bucky's flesh hand slid from your hair down your neck, leaving a trail of goosebumps. You gasped softly at the contact, and he took the opportunity to trace your lower lip with his tongue. Heat pooled in your stomach as you parted your lips, allowing him to deepen the kiss further.
His vibrainum hand continued its exploration down your body, while his warm, flesh hand stayed at the small of your back, anchoring you. You lost yourself in the sensation, forgetting for a moment about the dangerous mission ahead. Bucky's kisses were intoxicating, making you dizzy with desire. His metal hand traced the curve of your hip, sending shivers through your body.
Suddenly, the sharp ring of a phone cut through the haze of passion. You jerked away from Bucky, reality crashing back. He reached into his pocket, pulling out a sleek black device.
"It's time," he said, his voice husky. "The car's waiting downstairs."
You nodded, trying to catch your breath and calm your racing heart. As you stood up from his lap, you smoothed down your dress, acutely aware of how close you'd come to losing control.
Bucky rose as well, adjusting his tie and running a hand through his slightly mussed hair. His eyes met yours, filled with…
Filled with what, you weren’t sure.
If you made it out tonight, maybe you might have a chance to find out.
↠ Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest
Read more stories from the Deliciously Debauched Labor Day Weekend!
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What do we think? Do we want to see more of them?
I think this could be a post-TFATWS and pre-Thunderbolts kind of thing maybe. idk.
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes fan fiction#bucky barnes fan fic#female reader#curvy reader#millennial reader#aspen wrote something#hotbuckysummer2024#deliciously debauched labor day weekend
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Your orc husband comes to fetch you
A little thing to start 2024. I've gotten lots of requests for more orcs ^_^
General Plot: Your husband finds out you've been injured in battle and comes to fetch you.
Orc (Reven) x GN reader
Word count: 1K-ish
More SFW fics
TW: Mention of amputation, mention of break up, hurt comfort, sfw fluff, size difference
“Heard the news?” Reven’s client asked, a brave move considering the razor at his throat.
Skilled fingers never wavering as he drew the blade across his client's chin, he let out a bored grunt, focused on his task.
“There’s rarely any news that hasn't made it through the shop.”
His client’s eyes twinkled, eager to share some gossip.
“They say the Dragon Slayer is retiring.”
Reven’s graceful stroke paused, and he pulled his hand back before he sliced the man's cheek.
“Oh? I thought they’d never give up their crusade.”
“Word is the crusade is over. The dragons pillaging Walker’s Keep are dead. The slayer killed them all.”
Reven took a deep breath before asking his next question.
“Will they be returning to their homeland?”
The client snorted.
“If they ever leave the hospital. They were gravely wounded in the final battle. Thank the Goddess the dragon’s gone, they won't be doing much-”
The razor clattered to the floor with a metallic clang, and Reven’s feet carried him out the front door of his barbershop without a word to the half-shaved client sitting in his chair.
He left his crinkled apron in the dirt as he mounted his horse and steered her towards the road to Walker’s Keep.
–
“Come on hero, eat a little,” one of the nurses at the clinic urged you, holding up a spoon of oatmeal.
You waved it away with your remaining hand, your face a miserable, twisted version of itself.
She huffed, getting annoyed.
“You haven't eaten in three days! It's only a hand. Some of the people here have lost brain matter, their genitals…You've already killed the dragons. You don't need-”
A clamor outside the door of your hospital room cut off her little tirade.
An orderly’s deep voice drifted through the door.
“Sir! Only family can-”
“I am family, dammit. I'm their husband!”
Reven’s familiar baritone made your heart flutter. Still, you were afraid. It had been so long since you'd seen one another. Three years and you hadn't parted on a happy note.
The door flew open, and there he was, his massive shoulders filling the frame, emerald green skin as rich as you remembered it. He’d changed his hair, no longer cropped around his ears, but long hanging in a thick ponytail over his shoulders.
He tipped his head to enter the room, dark eyes on you, and his lips twisted around his tusks in an expression you remembered as annoyance.
“Get out,” he barked at the nurse, and she shuffled past him without question.
Your voice was only a murmur.
“You came.”
“Of course, I came. I would have come sooner, but someone failed to send their spouse a note mentioning they’d lost their hand!”
Your eyes dipped, full of shame.
You'd left Reven on a cold December night. He'd begged you not to go, cried, yelled, and made you a million promises if you'd just let someone else handle the mission. But no, you had to be a hero, and look what that brought you. You were broken and useless, alone in a hospital bed.
“Stop thinking so hard,” he muttered, chestnut eyes roving over you, ever analytical.
He crossed the room and plopped down on the bed, holding his hand out.
“What?” you asked.
“Let me see it.”
You stretched your bandaged stump to him, and he fingered it gingerly. For an Orc he had nimble fingers honed by years as a barber.
“Bah…Just a scratch.”
He gently placed it in his lap, twisting his body so the two of you were face to face.
“It's my sword hand. I'll never kill another dragon.”
His head tipped to the side.
“I've heard the dragons are dead.”
“They are, but-”
“But nothing. You accomplished your mission…sacrificed for the kingdom…It's time to come home.”
You blinked at him, tears burning the backs of your eyes.
“You want me to come home? I'm…I'm useless.”
He chuckled.
“Nothing's changed without your hand. You've never been good at anything but killing.”
“Swordsmanship was my only skill.”
“A stupid one.”
His lips twisted around his tusks again, but this time with amusement. Large fingers slipped over your cheek, and he pulled your head to him, brushing his lips over yours. His scent and taste were so familiar. It was as if you'd been holding your breath the three years you'd been gone and could finally get some oxygen. When he pulled back, he looked down at you, expression solemn.
“I wrote you letters. You never wrote back. Did you toss them all out?”
You shook your head, trying to hold the tears back. The Dragon Slayer crying was embarrassing. You nodded to the small chest where the nurses had placed your belongings.
Reven crossed the room, opening the box and pulling out a stack of letters tied with a green ribbon you’d come across.
“I didn’t know what to say. I felt…guilty…I guess.”
He tossed them on your lap, narrowing his eyes at you.
“Hello. I love you, would have sufficed.”
“I’m sorry, Reven. I left and ruined myself when I could have been home with you. I could have been happy.”
“You killed the dragons, accomplished your goal…You aren’t happy?”
“It feels emptier than I thought it would. I left you alone. Anything could have happened to you, and I would have lost my chance to see you again.”
He chuckled.
“I’m not helpless.”
“I left you alone. It’s unforgivable.”
“That’s for me to decide.”
You looked up at him, searching his eyes.
“You’d forgive me? I don’t deserve it. I got hurt. You told me this would happen, and I didn’t listen. Now I’m just a burden and a fool.”
He sighed and pushed you to the side, sliding into bed with you before pulling you back into his lap. His nose grazed the column of your neck, and you felt him breathe in your scent.
“Maybe a fool, but never a burden, and being foolish doesn’t make you unlovable. I missed you (Y/N).”
“I missed you, too.”
“You weren’t the only fool.”
“You started dating another bloodthirsty idiot while I was away?”
“I should have come with you. I was angry at you, but that didn’t last long. Then I was bitter you hadn’t asked me to join you, and I didn’t insist.”
“Kharma caught up to me.”
“If you hadn’t lost your hand, would you still be gallivanting over the countryside fighting monsters?”
“Probably.”
He buried his face in your neck, and you felt the slight wetness of tears against your skin.
“I don’t think it was Kharma…I think it was Fate.”
“Fate?”
“Fate spared two idiots unwilling to budge.”
You sat on those words for a few minutes, the heat of Reven’s body seeping into your bones. You could never quite get warm the entire time you’d been gone, no matter how many furs you donned. You always felt cold, even with the heat of the dragon’s flame singing the tips of your eyelashes.
“Don’t leave again,” he whispered.
“It wasn’t worth it. I’d read and reread your letters all those lonely nights, wishing I had the strength to abandon my quest and return. I was afraid…I’ve never been afraid before. I’ve killed monsters my whole life and never felt fear, but the thought that you might reject me if I walked through those doors…that I’d come home to find some other lover warming your bed…our home…”
You felt Reven smile into your skin.
“There aren’t too many half-feral sword-wielding jocks roaming around Elderoak. That’s what I go for.”
“Thank you for coming to get me, Reven.”
“I should have come sooner.”
“I wouldn’t have listened.”
“I’m bigger than you. I should have thrown you over my shoulder and taken you home.”
“And now…?”
“You could walk…or I could throw you over my shoulder anyway if you like that sort of thing.”
You twisted your body to snuggle deeper into Reven’s arms. You finally felt warm for the first time in three years.
“Did the doctor clear you to leave?”
“They’ve done all they can…they were waiting on me to eat.”
You felt his chest shudder as he chuckled.
“You don’t want cold hospital gruel? Spoiled.”
“Not spoiled enough. I miss your cooking. I want to go home.”
He hopped to his feet, making you jump as he hoisted you princess-style into his arms.
“I’ll come back for your things,” he promised as he carried you out the door.
“Forget about it…It’s just armor and weapons I don’t need anymore. The letters are the only things I want to keep.”
“Are you sure? They’re a little sad. I missed you so badly…I whined more than anything.”
“I want them to…remember how unfair it was…everything I put you through to stroke my own pride.”
He lifted you up to his lips to press a heavy kiss into your forehead.
“Even if you forget, I’ll make you remember. You left, but I let you go. I’m sorry for that (Y/N).”
“Then we’re both sorry.”
Your stomach grumbled loudly, and Reven laughed again.
“Sorry and hungry. Think you can get down some tavern food? It’s not my cooking, but you can’t wait to eat until we get back to Elderoak.”
You looked up at him, cupping his thick jaw with your remaining hand.
“In your company, it’s just as good.”
#monster boyfriend#monster x reader#monster fluff#x reader#monster lover#orc x reader#orc boyfriend#orc romance#orc#orctober#teratophillia#terato fic#orc fluff#fliff#fluff#romance fluff#sfw romance#sfw fluff#sfw monster fluff#monster x gn reader#x gn reader#gn reader#monster romance#monster fic#orc fic#my fic#my fic writing#x yn#yn#self insert
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Steve having a little sister (who’s like a first-time) senior who has a crush on Eddie. But she’s a cheerleader, her parents expect her to marry an Ivy League, senator’s son or something. She kept her crush a secret until Jason calls him a freak in front of the whole cafeteria- and she punches him.
I had so much fun writing this request! I hope you enjoy what I've come up with, and if you notice the joke I stole from Glee, no you didn't. Reader’s race is not specified and she could be adopted because adoption is a wonderful, amazing thing. Harrington!reader and Eddie 4ever.
Words: 3.1k
“Mr. Munson, late again, I see.”
Mrs. O’Donnell heaves a disappointed sigh as Eddie gives her an over the top smile.
“Sorry, had a meeting with the principal. He wanted to know why you gave me detention again.”
Mrs. O’Donnell frowns. “I didn’t give you detention.”
“Oh, phew,” Eddie says as he slides into his seat. “Glad to hear it. I’ll try and be on time next time.”
The class lets out a titter of laughter as Mrs. O’Donnell rolls her eyes and turns back to the board. The dopey grin is stuck on your face as you lean forward in your seat. Resting your upper body on your desk, you bite your bottom lip as you look Eddie up and down. From your vantage point, you can only see the back left side of him, but you’ll stare at that for the entirety of the class period if you can.
“Miss Harrington?”
Begrudgingly, you tear your gaze away from Eddie’s glorious hair and see Mrs. O’Donnell watching you impatiently.
“Um, yes?”
“I was wondering if you’d like to enlighten us about the Stamp Act?” the elderly woman says.
“Uh…” you trail off, mind suddenly blank of everything that isn’t Eddie Munson. “I would not.”
A few people in the class let out snorts of laughter, but Eddie barks out the most beautiful sound you’ve ever heard. It makes your stomach fizzle, and your head feel all floaty. Even O’Donnell’s disapproving scowl can’t dampen your giddiness.
The rest of class, you’re riding on a high. You made Eddie laugh. Out of all the accomplishments in your life, you’re not sure if one has ever meant more to you. Making honor roll? Eh. Becoming a cheerleader? So what? Doesn’t compare to making the cutest guy you’ve ever seen laugh.
Okay, you tell yourself. When class is over, you’re going to talk to him. The bell rings, and you’re scrambling to get your things together. Tossing them into your bag, you sling it over your shoulder and follow Eddie out of the classroom.
“H-Hey, Eddie?” you manage.
He turns his head to look over his shoulder and gives you a smile that has your heart stuttering.
“Hey, Harrington. What’s up?”
“Did you see A Nightmare on Elm Street Part 2?” you ask, somehow not stumbling over your words. You’d had Steve bring the VHS tape home for you to watch just so you could ask Eddie about it.
“Freddy’s Revenge?” Eddie asks, wrinkling his nose up. “Such a letdown after the first one.”
“Yeah,” you say with a chuckle. “The first one was pretty good. This one made me want to fall asleep.”
“Ironic,” Eddie says with a smirk. He opens the school door for you, and you give him a grateful smile as you step out into the parking lot. You watch as he digs his keys out of his pocket. “See you tomorrow, Harrington.”
“Bye, Eddie.” You’re staring at him as he walks away, and you know you need to stop. But how can you when his ass looks the way it does in his jeans? Once he hops into his van, the trance is broken, and you make your way to your brother waiting in his car at the other end of the parking lot.
You groan as you yank open the car door and slip inside. Steve looks less than thrilled himself, but it has nothing to do with you. Your parents are forcing the two of you to join them at a company party tonight, which both of you are vehemently against. But Steve was tasked with picking you up from school, taking you home so both of you can get ready, then to the party.
“Think I can fake an epileptic seizure and get out of this?” Steve asks on the way home.
“You’re not epileptic,” you say.
“That’s why I said ‘fake’ it,” Steve says with a scoff.
“They’d find a way to make you come anyway,” you say, crossing your arms over your chest.
The party is just as horrible as you and your older brother imagined it would be. You’re forced into an itchy blue dress and Steve looks like he’s about two seconds away from ripping his tie off. The stuffy guests walk around with their noses in the air, only deigning to talk to those they deem successful enough. You want to throw yourself out of one of the windows as you see your parents approaching you with an older couple that they’ll probably expect you to remember from somewhere.
“Well, look at you,” the older man says. “All grown up.” The way he says it makes a shiver go down your spine.
“You must have all the boys chasing after you,” his wife says with a wink. It’s like they’re competing to see who can make you the most uncomfortable. Before you can open your mouth to speak, your mom jumps in.
“Oh, we have high hopes for her,” she says with a chuckle. “Going to go to Yale or Stanford and find her an Ivy League man to settle down with.”
And when exactly did we decide this? you think to yourself.
“Someone well-to-do,” your father adds. “A senator’s son, maybe. Who knows? We could be raising a future First Lady here.”
You want to gag. Steve must sense your temper rising, because he rests a hand on your shoulder and gives it a reassuring squeeze.
“Remember us when you’re famous,” the older man says.
I don’t even remember you right now. The words are on the tip of your tongue, but your dad changes the subject to something about profit reports.
Steve drives the two of you home before your parents, the two of them insisting they were going to stick around a little longer. The minute you get into your room, you throw your heels towards your closet. Your brother hears you banging around and comes to stand in your doorway, leaning against the doorframe and crossing his arms over his chest. He’s taken his tie off and undone the first few buttons of his white button up shirt.
“What’s the matter, First Lady? Didn’t like getting signed up for an arranged marriage?”
You whirl on him, practically shoving a finger in his face. “Do not call me that. I am not some prized pig they can sell at the fair.”
“Technically, I think the pigs are judged at the fair, not sold.”
Groaning, you rub your hands down your face.
“I’m running away,” you say, throwing your hands in the air. “I’m joining the circus. Or a motorcycle gang. Anything! As long as it’s not here.”
“Oh, relax,” Steve says. “When you go off to college you can date whoever you want. They’ll never know.”
“Why do I have to wait until I go off to college?” you demand. “Why can’t I date whoever I want right now?”
“Do you want to date someone right now?” Steve asks, furrowing his brows.
“That’s not the point,” you say, but you feel the heat rising to your cheeks.
“Holy shit, you do,” Steve says with a huff of laughter. He pushes himself off the doorframe. “Who is it?”
“Goodnight, Steve.” You shove him out of your doorway before slamming and locking your bedroom door.
“The fuck did you say, Freak?”
Jason Carver’s voice grates on your nerves as you make your way down the hall. Unfortunately, there’s only one person the jock douche would be calling that name and it has you seeing red. You were still steamed from your parents’ comments last night, and this is just going to push you over the top.
“Who, me?”
You walk into the cafeteria to see Eddie grinning at the basketball playing asshole.
“You’re the only freak here,” Jason says.
Your white cheer sneakers squeak to a stop on the linoleum floor, and you drop your bag down by your feet. The clatter has Jason’s gaze shifting to you. Most of the cafeteria’s attention shifts to you, actually. But you don’t notice as you stalk up to the bully. Normally, you might say something snarky to him, but you’re done with words. All your pent up frustration is taken out on Jason’s chin as you serve him a right hook. He stumbles back a few steps and there are gasps around the cafeteria. Your hand is throbbing, but the pain is nothing compared to the satisfaction you feel at shutting that jerk up. The small smear of blood above his upper lip has you smirking.
“Miss Harrington!”
With a groan, your satisfaction wanes when you see Principal Higgins glaring at you. His glasses are perched low on his nose and his hands are high on his hips.
“My office. Now.”
Thankfully, Principal Higgins’s secretary is kind enough to give you some ice to put on your knuckles. Some staffing emergency took precedence, so you’re stuck sitting on a bench outside his office while he deals.
“You’ve got some arm.”
The voice that you’d know anywhere sounds from above you and your neck cracks from how quickly you look up. Eddie stands there with his hands in his pockets, a sheepish smile on his lips.
“Oh. T-Thanks,” you say.
Eddie takes a seat next to you on the bench. He yanks a black bandana out of his back pocket and smooths it out across his lap before folding it lengthwise.
“May I?” he asks, gesturing to the ice you’re holding against your hand.
“Sure.” You extend your injured hand out, and Eddie secures the ice against your knuckles with the bandana, then ties it tight enough to keep everything in place.
“How’s that?” he asks.
“Better. Thank you.” You find it hard to meet his eyes, so you keep your focus on your hand as you bring it back into your lap.
“So,” Eddie says, turning himself sideways on the bench and making himself comfortable. “What made you punch ol’ Carver? I mean, I know we all want to do it, but no one’s been quite so brave. Not until you, that is. And from a cheerleader? One of his own?”
“I’m not one of his own,” you say, looking up at him. But Eddie has a playful smirk on his lips.
“Nah, I know you’re not. I’m just teasing you. But what did want to make you do that? Couldn’t have been all on my account.”
“Why not?” you ask with a frown.
Eddie lets out a chuckle and shakes his head. “Listen, Harrington. I don’t see you as someone who goes around punching people for the hell of it. You’re one of the nicest people in this hell hole of a town. The jackass must’ve done something to deserve it.”
“He did,” you say. “He called you a freak.”
“I don’t know if you’ve noticed,” he says, leaning in towards you with a conspiratorial whisper. “But most people do.”
“Well, they shouldn’t,” you say with a frown. “You’re not. And I hate how Jason always does it in front of a crowd. It’s like he needs to put you down in front of others to prove he’s this king or whatever. So, someone needed to knock him off his throne in front of people, too.”
“My knight in shining cheer skirt,” Eddie teases with a wink. He’s shocked when your face goes red and you’re unable to look him in the eye. “You okay?”
“Y-Yeah,” you say, forcing yourself to meet his gaze. The heat in your face is getting worse by the second and you feel it’s only a matter of time before you crack.
“You sure? I didn’t make you uncomfortable?”
God, that’s the last thing Eddie could ever make you feel. You immediately shake your head, refusing to let him think those thoughts even for a moment.
“No, no, not at all. I’m sorry, I guess I’m just an…awkward person,” you say with a wince.
“Maybe I like awkward,” Eddie says, gently kicking his black boot against your white sneaker. Butterflies erupt in your stomach, and they have plenty of room to buzz about, seeing as you hadn’t gotten to eat your lunch.
“Maybe I like awkward, too,” you say softly.
Eddie smirks. “Oh, then you must adore me, Harrington.”
“Maybe I do,” you say with a shrug, forcing yourself to maintain eye contact with him.
“Well, maybe I like sweet, pretty cheerleaders who can sucker punch like Bruce Lee and talk to me about horror movies.”
Your mind stopped listening after Eddie called you “pretty” though. Did he really think that? Or was he just saying it to be nice?
“Hmm,” you muse. “Guess I should send Hailey Hudson from the team your way to talk about Halloween then, huh?”
Eddie chuckles and the same sensation as when you made him laugh before fills your body.
“Nightmare on Elm Street is more my cup of tea,” Eddie says. “Plus, talking to any other cheerleader bedsides you doesn’t seem very appealing to me.”
“Miss Harrington,” Principal Higgins says, sticking his head out of his office. “You can come in now.” He steps back inside, and you release a sigh. Of course talking to Eddie would have to come to an end eventually, but why now?
“Well,” you say, standing up from the bench. “Guess it’s time to hear my sentence.”
“Maybe if you get released early for good behavior, we could grab pizza sometime?” Eddie looks nervous, and that alone makes you want to laugh. Why on earth would he be nervous asking if you wanted to hang out?
“That sounds great,” you say, the euphoric smile unable to stay off your face no matter how hard you try.
“Yeah?” Eddie asks, seeming shocked.
“Why do you sound surprised?” you ask with a giggle. Taking courage from the fact that he seems to be getting nervous around you as well, you decide to be a little bolder. “I don’t just throw punches for anyone, you know.”
The most endearing smile grows on Eddie’s face, and he places one of his ring-clad hands over his heart.
“I am very honored to have the most beautiful girl in school defending my honor.” He outstretches his hand out to you as you begin to walk backwards towards the principal’s office. “I’ll wait for you.”
You can’t help but giggle. “I’ll have my parole officer contact you.”
“Should be easy since I’m in the phone book.”
“I’ll make sure to let her know. Bye, Munson.”
“See you later, Harrington.” He gives you one last smile before you step into the office.
The worst part isn’t the detention you were given or that you have to apologize to Carver. It’s that you’re told to call your parents to come and get you. Apparently, the school nurse is out for the day, and they can’t have you staying in school with a potentially injured hand. It hardly even hurts anymore, but you’re not going to let them know that. Let them think that you’ll be headed to the hospital for all you care.
When you pick up the phone from the desk, your finger hovers over the numbers. Principal Higgins is sitting right there, making sure you’re going to tell your parents exactly why you need to be picked up. At the last second though, you dial a different number.
“Thank you for calling Family Video, this is Steve. How can I help you?”
“Uh, hi, Dad,” you say, gripping at the receiver pressed against your ear.
“Dad?” you hear Steve ask in confusion. “This is—”
“I-I know,” you say. “I’m just calling, Dad, because I need you to pick me up from school. I’m in Principal Higgins’ office.
You can tell Steve understands now by the sigh that comes across the line. “What did you do?”
“Well, my hand is injured, and the nurse isn’t on duty today, so they don’t want me staying at school while I’m hurt and no one can check it out.”
“Tell him why it’s injured,” Principal Higgins says.
“Yes, tell me,” Steve echoes, obviously being able to hear his former principal’s words.
“I, um, I punched Jason Carver,” you say.
“You did what?!” Steve all but screams.
“He called Eddie Munson a freak in front of the whole cafeteria.” You say this piece looking Higgins dead in the eye. Are you going to do anything about that? you want to ask. “So, I punched Carver to shut him up.”
“Honestly, I’m impressed,” Steve says.
“Thanks. So, uh, can you come get me?”
“My shift is over in ten minutes,” Steve says. “I’ll head there as soon as I get out of here.”
“Thanks, St—uh, Dad. I’ll see you soon.” You hang up the phone and Principal Higgins stares at you over the rims of his glasses.
“He on his way?” he asks.
“He’ll be here soon.”
“I can’t believe you punched Jason Carver,” Steve says, shaking his head in amusement as he drives you home.
“He’s an asshole,” you defend with a shrug.
“Over Munson, though?” Steve asks incredulously. “Seriously? Couldn’t have picked another hill to die on?”
“Nope,” you say through gritted teeth. Crossing your arms over your chest, you stare out the passenger window.
“Why Munson, though, I—” Steve cuts himself off with a groan and shakes his head. “Oh, no. Please tell me I’m wrong.”
“I’d love to,” you reply. “But I need to know what you’re wrong about first.”
“Munson isn’t the guy you want to date, is he?” Steve asks nervously.
Your face gets hot for what feels like the millionth time in the past few days. But that’s all the confirmation your brother needs, because he’s letting out a groan that makes it sound like he’s in agony.
“You really have a thing for the Freak?”
“I have one good fist left,” you say. “Want me to use it on you?”
“I’ll tell Mom and Dad about your detention then,” Steve says with a shrug.
“Then I’d tell them about you moving the dirty magazines from beneath your bed into the air vent,” you counter.
“How do you even know about that?” Steve asks, shooting you a glare before looking back at the road.
“Your room and mine share the same vent and I can hear the pages rustling when the air is on.”
“You’re the worst,” Steve grumbles.
“You also have no room to complain with some of the trash you’ve dated,” you point out.
“Are you and Munson…a thing?” Steve asks, sounding like he hates every syllable of the question.
“No,” you tell him. “But he asked me to go get pizza with him. So, maybe soon.”
“And that will make you happy?” your brother asks.
A smile comes to your face just thinking about it. “It would.”
Steve nods his head and lets out a deep breath as if he’s resigning himself to the fact that you have feelings for Eddie.
“Okay, but you’re telling Mom and Dad.”
#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson x harrington!reader#harrington!reader#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson fic#eddie munson fan fiction#eddie munson fanfic#request
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So I have two general life philosophies that guide most of my actions. They're deceptively simple, but when I figured them out it really changed my perspective on stuff in a helpful way. Maybe they'll help you!
They are:
If I want something to change for the better, I have to be the one to change it. Doing nothing only makes things worse.
This applies to... everything. Want to get better at drawing? I have to be the one to practice. Doing nothing only makes me worse. Want my house to be clean? I have to be the one to clean it. Doing nothing only allows the mess to multiply. Want my garden to be beautiful? I have to be the one to weed it. Doing nothing only allows the weeds to spread. Want a better political system? I have to be the one to vote, and then the one to put pressure on my elected officials/support groups furthering the progressive policies I value. Doing nothing only allows the other side to make things worse.
It sucks. It's hard. It's the unfortunate truth.
The second one is a quote a friend shared from her therapist, and it fucking picked me up, turned me around, and spat me out a fully changed person:
Trying harder is not a plan.
Goddamn does that slap me around the face. Trying harder is not a plan. If you have an issue remembering your tasks at work and your solution is, "I'll try harder," you are setting yourself up for failure because there's nothing actionable there. When you inevitably fail (because trying harder is not a plan), you won't have any idea where the failure came from or where to go from there, and you'll feel like absolute shit for failing.
"I struggle with taking my medication on time. I have to try harder to do it!" ❌ Trying harder is not a plan!
"I struggle with taking my medication on time, so I'm adding calendar reminders to my phone and computer that require me to check off that I've taken it, and I'm storing my medication on my computer desk, which is where I eat my breakfast, so I can take it as soon as the reminder goes off." ✅ This is an actual plan! If it breaks down or fails, you can evaluate what parts worked and what parts didn't! You then have knowledge you can use to make a new plan!
Both of these principles also combine really well. Let's take the gardening, for example: I want my garden to be beautiful and functional, so I need to be the one to make that change, since doing nothing only allows my garden to get overgrown. I also know that "trying harder to garden" is not a plan, and I know that to-do lists work really well for me from previous experience.
Solution: I put a recurring reminder on my to-do list to garden for 20 minutes (if the weather allows). I don't have to remember to garden: The to-do list takes care of that. I don't have to remember to add it to the to-do list because it's recurring. All I have to do is go garden so I can come back inside and check it off, which makes my brain happy both because gardening is good for my mental health and because I fuckin' love accomplishing things on my to-do list.
If I want something to change for the better, I have to be the one to change it. Doing nothing only makes things worse.
Trying harder is not a plan.
Give 'em a shot, yeah?
#life advice#you know how sometimes you hear a single sentence#and it changes you forever?#that was “trying harder is not a plan” for me#I swear it rewired my brain
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Culture of the Ghost Zone
SO! This is less of a full on prompt, and more of an opportunity.
I've been in this Fandom for over a year now and over that time I've seen so many little bits or lore and headcanons about the Ghost Zones Culture, but I've never seen a single post put them all together.
So, here I'll try to write down as many as I can think of, and anyone else can add their own Headcanons, or add to whatever I or someone else writes!
...
So! My personal Headcanon is that when a Ghost Passes on, it's a thing to be celebrated.
Ghosts are Immortal Beings, holding onto a desire or unfinished business that tethers them to the Mortal Plane. They live, because they are Unfulfilled, unable to accomplish the task that would allow them to Pass on, and be at peace with themselves.
So when a Ghost manages to fulfill their Obsession, manages to Pass On to the After? It's something to CELEBRATE!
Like when a Viking would die, you don't just mourn their death, you celebrate their Life! A Ghosts Passing On is much the same. When one of them manages it, there are parties across the Zone of people who knew them, or people who didn't but still want to celebrate! It's a Joyous thing when someone you know was able to find peace!
...
Ghosts socialize through Battle.
Ghosts are Immortal, Superpowered, and Stuck together for Centuries. They are going to fight, and they are going to love the thrill of it!
From the freshest of Newborns to the Oldest of Ancients, All Ghosts love the thrill of Battle. It's one of their defining traits! They have Centuries of nothing to do and energy to burn, and they devote it to the art of Combat!
And it's not just Brawls! Some Ghosts prefer to battle with Swords alone, others with their Fists and no Powers, others with their Powers and no Fists, there are entire communities of Ghosts who have specific Rules, or Customs for Combat!
In one part of the Zone, it may be common to Tackle any Ghost you see and instantly start to fight them, but in another? That would be seen as Rude, you need to throw down your glove in front of them to request a Battle!
Or in another section of the Zone you may be forced to battle without Weapons whatsoever, in another it may be Without Powers whatsoever, or with ONLY Powers!
The Fight Culture stretches far and wide, no two parts of the Zone are exactly the Same
...
Art is highly Valued.
Of course not all Ghosts are entirely focused on Battle, and even the ones that are like to focus on something else from time to time. Some of those Ghosts were Artists when they were Alive.
And they continued to make Art in Death. But this Art is Special, with all the Time in the World, a Ghost can spend Decades or even Centuries on their Magnum Opus! It would be their Life's Work, something they dedicated their entire Afterlives to!
So of course, it is respected. Ghosts know better than to ruin or destroy another Ghosts work or Art. Be it a Statue, a Painting, a Song, or a Theater Production.
...
I think that's Good for now, what do you think? Anything to add to the points I written down? Any entirely new points to add?
Go ahead!
#Dpxdc#Dp x dc#Dcxdp#Dc x dp#Danny Phantom#Dc#Dcu#I tagged Dpxdc because it is usually where I find the most interesting Cultural Headcanons#Also cause it's where I'm active the most#Ghost Zone#Ghost Zone Culture#Infinite Realms#Infinite Realms Culture#Ghosts celebrate when a Ghost passes on#Ghosts love to fight#Ghosts fight in different ways with different rules#Ghosts love Art#Ghosts respect eachother#Even if they hate eachother
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MOM
Reader is a combat medic, a BIG sweeth tooth and a mother to 141 boys (dont forget can cook too) a waifu material
In case with Los Vaqueros
Masterlist
After they accomplish their mission the 141 task force will be holding a small feast with Los Vaqueros to strengthen their ties of brotherhood
All brotherhood aside...their true intention is....to taste again the meal you made, and now Alejandro and Rudy join the party
Two days before the party, reading your recipe book inside your office, knowing the boys will have a big appetite
'maybe I'll make taco for the snack...or maybe naco with guacamole..?....guhh..but what if they don't like it? I'll be making another country's cuisines, I don't want to offend them or something like that..'
Then you pick up your phone beside you texting Alejandro what they want for the meal, but then you shake your head putting back your phone beside you unfolding your laptop searching for the recipe you're going to make
"I promise them it would be a surprise after all, if I ask him he would know what Im making"
"Making what?" suddenly Kyle barged into your office with his innocent eyes, immediately snapped your laptop shut and gave him a wary smile
"Kyle!~ ohh..hoo...what are doing here hun?"
"Do I have a reason to hanging around with our beautiful Doc?"
"Well since my sweets stock has been decreasing these last few days, Im getting more suspicious with you boys hanging around my office" You shot Gaz a look when he opened your cabinet, and beamed when he saw his favorite candy
"Thanks for calling me beautiful though"
with a mouth full of candy he faced you and gave you a thumbs-up
"Say Doc ...what is the menu for the party?"
"Well...Im just going to research about it..Alejandro, Rudy and some of the Vaqueros will come..I want to try some of the Mexican cuisine...." Gaz furrowing his eyebrow sensing a hesitation in your tone and doubt
"But?" he walks to your desk
"..well our taste buds are different from them and..well..." pursing your lips
"Doc.. Im sure whatever you're making they'll like it.."
"You..sure?"
"Positive..side's who doesn't like your cooking? Ghost always asks for more...."
"hmp...yeah...5 plates,after that he asked for a snack...no wonder he's huge I still remember that one time when the canteen almost lost its ingredients for one month" you huff at him, but because of him it eases all of your worries and you've decided that you're going to make both taco and naco for the snack, now for the main dish and drink...
'Oh well let's just make barbecue and fruit punch, good thing the boys aren't picky....and got a big appetite oh..maybe some cake or pastries would be nice~..'
Notice the beam in your eyes Gaz smiled gladly to ease all your worries
.
.
2 days after, as promised the Vaqueros came to 141 base Captain Price welcomed them followed by Gaz beside him
"Good to see you again Colonel Vargas" Price said firmly shaking Alejandro's hand
"Captain Price, you too comrade!"
"Come Soap and Ghost are waiting for you inside, let just hope they did not gobble up the food..." Price escorted them to the canteen
"I've heard Doc the one who making it?"
"Aye...along she my best medic she is the best cook here, I sure you'll love it Colonel" Price proudly boasts about you
"Can't wait to taste it then...I've heard a lot from Soap"
"heh bloke always bragging about her ..a lot" Price huffs a smirk planted against his face, as they arrive at the canteen
They could smell the barbeque....and hear the arguing of Soap with Ghost
"THE F**** Johnny! you almost burnt it!" barked Ghost furiously fanning the smoke out of his masked face
"Well WHY don't YOU try it?!" challenged Soap as he tried to undo his mistake...but alas what was already done...is done
"Both of you! please just sit down!" you intervene them before getting heated, placing your hand against Soap's chest you quickly flip all the meat and the other vegetables, ordering both of them to sit down with your 'mom stare'
Like a disobedient child they sat, but not before kicking each other legs
Price facepalming as Alejandro just chuckles along with Rudy
"Hermano! We've come!" announced Alenjadro
"Alenjandro!, good to see you again brother!" beamed Soap as he rushed to Alejandro giving him a brotherly hug
As they reunited you huffed and took care of the barbeque, really you just took a minute to take some of the sauce in the kitchen and you asked for Ghost and Soap to take care of the barbecue
"Damn...this one is burnt...oh well..I guess this one is on my plate" mutter you the ever sacrifice placed the burnt one on your plate can't let any these boys of yours eat any burnt food on their off day
"Good to see you again Doc.." greeted Alejandro, as Rudy politely nodded at you
"Ah! yes Alejandro, Rudy! sorry I little late for the prepare, damnit Soap.." you mumbled cursing for your own stupidity to leave the cooking to the boys
"You want any help Hermana?" asks the sweet Rudy, you smile kindly at him
"No need Rudy, you're the guest here-"
"I insist Doc..." he insisted with a soft look in his eyes that made you melted
"Alright then...um..ah could you pour the soda inside the fruit punch there"
"Sure thing..all of it?" you nodded and he obediently poured all of the transparent soda inside the fruit punch, Alejandro stared at you in the slideness focusing on the barbecues pleased to see you again
"Okay..Boys!! the food ready!"
Then Soap immediately rushed to your side and raised his palm, reminding him to eat the vegetables you gave him his plate as you give all of them their portions you take your plate
Rudy noticed that your portion was full of burnt BBQ, and he huffed at the ever the sacrificed you, when he offered you his good portion you refused him as you chuckled softy at him and said ‘Nah it's alright you enjoy your own I will make it again sides it brings more flavor to it’ tenderly gazing at the boys reminding you of your troublesome siblings
Damn he really want to take you away to his house and make you his wife
With so much laugh and joy they all eat, not forget the snacks and some pastries you make all of their exhaustment and the gore memory of the battle gone when they eat your cooking
"Ahh..s****...mine gone.."
"Damn Soap.. that's your third plate" grumble Ghost
"Betta’ me then you LT" Soap squinting his eyes at Ghosts who munching away his food like a hamster his cheeks storing the barbecue on his cheeks
“need more barbeque Gaz?” ask you noticing his empty plate, shaking his head Gaz takes one of the tacos on the big plate
“no need love, I’ll take the taco”
“ask me if you need more barbeque okay? I’ll make it again” smiled softly Gaz nodded, and then Price walked to you placing his rough hand on your shoulder
“Just take it easy Doc, I’ll take care of the boys just enjoy the feast yeah?”
“you sure Cap?”
“Positive” he rubbed your shoulder and pushed you gently back into your seat, both Alejandro and Rudy noticed the tender gaze from Price as he caressed your head this went unnoticed by you
Deep inside both of them felt a pang of jealousy, and then Alejandro approached you with his plate in his hand
“Evening Doc”
“Ah Alejandro! Sorry, I'm not greeting you properly...” Shaking his head Alejandro chuckles
“don't mind it Doc, I really enjoyed the feast you made though wonder Soap bragging about it” he gave you a charming smile that made you flustered (Oh God I thank you for making such a dashing creature like him)
“i-its not really something to brag about...I just love to cook for the boys thats all..” his thick eyebrow twitching
‘for the boys’...now that REALLY making him jealous of the 141 men
“Ever thinking of transfers to another team Doc?” asks Alejandro suddenly
Out of instinct, the 141 task force eavesdropped the conversation, squinting their eyes at Alejandro while Rudy quietly observed them slurping his fruit punch
“Well...”you trail..staring at your half eaten burnt barbeque (made with love by SOAP) the atmosphere becomes tense of course this goes unnoticed by you, glancing at the boys who immediately act like they didn’t eavesdrop on your conversation
Smiled at the boys you glance at Alejandro
“Nope not at all..” raised his thick eyebrows, a disappointment filled his chest alas he still smiled and faced his body towards you his gaze flickering to 141 who smiled proudly at your remark, then back to you
“...may..I ask why?”ask him
“I..enjoy the time I spend with them..well..except when we are on the mission that is..heh..and I doubt they’ll allow me to transfer to another team” After that you drink the fruit punch
“Ah..right..of course...they are deeply in love with you Doc” claims Alejandro, you bashfully chuckle while the others snap their head towards Alejandro with their eyes popping out
“yeah...more like they in love with my cooking heh those rascal..”
The 141 sighed in relief but was somehow frustrated that you didn’t take a hint
The Colonel again raised his eyebrow as he glanced at the 141 who were slightly slumped but still munching away their food, then Alejandro realized
‘she..doesn’t notice it ..does she?’
“Why the question?” ask youwhile taking a bite of your taco, Alejandro smirking wiping a speck of sauce on your cheeks with his thumb as he leans toward your face
“A-Alejandro?” your face flushed red and squeak when his nose touched yours
“If you would change your mind..would you like to become one of us? Besides..I would be at ease to have the woman I am attracted to in my team”
“W-wha?!”
A looming and rage aura came from the 141 body , Rudy just could pray that Alejandro came home safely
Suddenly Alejandro chuckles and leans away from your flushed face, booping your nose as you stare at him dazed and confused
“Kidding hermana, but really if you ever change your mind Vaqueros would always welcome you~”
“A-ah..okay..thank you..for the offer..” nomming the nachos you faced away from Alejandro, when you faced away from him Alejandro glanced at the 141 and shot them a smug smirk, Rudy just stared at him deadpan
‘oh...Ale..I hope you are back home safely..’
Note:
Arghhh..!! Sorry for the delay! Im really busy with my project and all
Coffee please?
#call of duty#call of duty x reader#mom#john soap mctavish#john soap mctavish x reader#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#john price#john price x reader#kyle gaz garrick#kyle gaz garrick x reader#alejandro vargas#alejandro vargas x reader#rodolfo rudy parra#rodolfo rudy parra x reader#task force 141 x reader
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMD!
Hello everyone! Today @teaableu and I's EMD AU is turning 1 year old! Yay! 💖🥳
I didn't even realize I came up with the idea on Halloween until Teaa pointed it out to me, but I thought it was so funny
Anyways, we want to celebrate EMD's birthday as a way to honor how far this au has come, and, of course, to thank you to everyone who's supported and interacted with the au so far! Teaa and I have compiled some unposted art and other fun stuff that we'd like to share with you on this very special day 🖤🖤🖤
So without further ado...
This is something that I've thought about and want to share because I think it's so interesting...
At a certain age, Draxum started pulling One away for “special” training, which was basically Drax getting One to get used to taking lives, starting with small animals. At first, One had a really hard time pushing through and whenever he finally got the job done, he’d feel really guilty afterwards
He’d cry and Drax would ask him why and would say that crying about it is pointless and it won't help him.
I had this very specific idea of Draxum pulling One away from Two when they were playing + having fun then having One accomplish this task probably for the 2nd or third time and One coming back to Two covered in blood, absolutely numbed and hollow, which kind of puts a wedge between them.
By the time Draxum puts One in the nexus, One’s already sorta used to that feeling and it’s not such a big deal— but I was thinking the nexus is maybe what makes One think that killing is acceptable because when he kills he gets rewarded and maybe it’s also what makes him realize what his purpose is— and ofc Draxum’s already been feeding him that but when One is fighting in the arena, he actually gets what Draxum means ab their purpose or whatever about being warriors and stuff bc he knows he can fight and that he can kill and that he’s good at it and that’s what makes Draxum happy
and I just think this is very interesting bc this implies that, initially, One knew what he was doing was morally wrong and he could feel it but bc he was encouraged to kill and wasn’t punished for it, his viewpoint kinda got skewed
And in Two's case, he started to kill ppl maybe either after One fights in the nexus or he sees One kill one of the animals bc he sees his brother doing this and thinks “oh, yeah. I can do that” but bc he wasn’t taught the difference between what he should destroy and what he should protect, that’s kind of why he’s Like That. And it's why Draxum fears/doesn't trust him like he trusts One.
ANIMATICS/EDITS
Watch The World Burn
Blow
Deja Vu
PLAYLISTS
EMD Season 1
EMD Season 2
One + Raph
One + Mikey
Two + Mikey
Two + Raph
Raph + Mikey
MINI-COMICS...
Two's arm (coming soon)
One's heart (coming soon)
SNEAK PEEK: Smart Lair
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Turtle's arc is so subtle yet so good and I love it a lot, which sucks since I've seen a number of people write him off as just "socially awkward kid who is boring", which?? No??? Gimme a second just to ramble, okay?
Turtle has terrible self-esteem issues and an inferiority complex. He puts himself down, calling himself boring, stupid, and generally useless constantly in his internal dialogue. He's kind and sweet and really well meaning, but he's socially awkward and shy and can't exactly strike up a conversation.
He's like this in due part of being one of Queen Coral's many...many sons. Christ alive this woman had thirty-two sons-- but that's besides the point. He's just another dragon. He's not old enough to be a leader, but not young enough to exactly be any special. He's a middle child. He's a nobody. Just another SeaWing prince who's destined to either run away or to become a military general.
The one time Turtle was ever truly acknowledged was when the night happened with his father, Gill. Gill needed Turtle to fetch one of the royal guards so that they could protect Queen Coral's eggs. But, Turtle couldn't find them. He failed. Gill lashes out, snapping back at Turtle for his inability to do such a simple task and killing the eggs in the process. Turtle internalized this moment. He was useless. He's a nobody, and when he's forced to be somebody, he'll just fail and let everyone down.
Thus, he doesn't see himself as anything special. A fuck up if anything; which makes it all the more ironic that he's an animus dragon. He's literally got the most powerful, special ability in the entire continent, and more than anything he's self-conscious and terrified of it as he would then be pushed into the limelight over it. Because of it, Turtle has made some...rather selfish choices every now and then. The incident with Anemone was created solely because he was petrified of being put on a pedestal. He doesn't want to be some grand dragon. So, he diverted attention away from him and enchanted Anemone to have magic.
Turtle doesn't want to make choices or do anything out of fear of failure and letting others down. Worse is if he's discovered to be an animus, where he's then elevated to such high expectations that he is convinced he will never be able to accomplish. He's held back by his own perceived inadequacy. He doesn't think highly of himself. He doesn't want the spotlight as he's both afraid of being seen and afraid of what those people will say when he lets them down.
He blended into the background in Moon Rising. Moon herself was confused by not being able to read his thoughts, which turned out to be because of the Magic Plot Rock we all know and love as skyfire. However, as the rest of the Jade Winglet ran off when Moon revealed to have been a mind reader, Turtle stuck around. He related to that. He felt pity and understood Moon the most. They are most like one another anyways, with the both of them being ashamed of their own powers and fearing being rejected by their loved ones the most.
He's a deeply kind and considerate soul who wants nothing more than to help people. He cares for Moon and wants to comfort her when she's at her lowest. He is so sweet, but he does it in a quiet, deeply personal way. He doesn't like big gestures or calling attention upon himself. He just likes being close to another. I feel he connected most with Moon because he found his own insecurities and fears in her and related to that. He found another person like him.
The Jade Winglet helps Turtle a lot with his own issues. Slowly throughout the series, he grows a little more confident of himself. His kindness is shown yet again with him becoming friends with Peril. Again, relating and sharing experiences of having powers and abilities that others want to take advantage of and unwillingly push them into roles they wouldn't want. He laughs, jokes, and playfully banters with her. He's getting better and better.
And then...Darkstalker.
Darkstalker throws a wrench into everything. Turtle reverts instantly back to his scared, cowardly ways. He enchants a stick to hide himself from Darkstalker, instantly sensing that Darkstalker hated him. He feels powerless to stop Darkstalker. What could he do?? Well, he could try to use his magic, but that would mean he steps out into the spotlight! He's seen! But this is serious. Darkstalker is massive, has animus magic, can read minds, and can see into the future. Turtle is just a kid. He's a nobody. He can't do anything.
He's scared. He feels useless and afraid. He's no hero. He doesn't want to be a hero. He's nothing like the heroes from legend. He's nobody.
Over the course of his book, we see Turtle quietly observe and stand by as Darkstalker takes over Jade Mountain Academy. He's plotting and planning, feigning his kindness and basking in the praise and worship others are giving him. Darkstalker is the antithesis to Turtle. He freely uses his magic without care and, more than anything, wants to be seen and witnessed by others. He loved the attention that his magic brings him. If somebody doesn't like him, then he either kills them off or brainwashes them into liking him. He's the polar opposite of Turtle in every way.
And you know who else is like that? Anemone.
Anemone is corrupted and warped even more by Darkstalker. Before hand, she was a kid who had just been released from the suffocating life as Queen Coral's only daughter. Darkstalker saw her as a pawn he could exploit. He encouraged her to be more risky and daring with her magic. He whispered into her ear and tells her that she's able to do anything. He's grooming a child he's grooming a child--
Regardless, Turtle feels guilty for everything Anemone has been put through. He doesn't fully understand the extent to which she had suffered as being physically tied to her mother at all times and being trained as a living weapon, but he feels so much guilt over it. Because of his inability to take accountability and risk being seen, he made a selfish, half-formed enchantment that was supposed to be a quick fix. He did not fully think of the consequences, and yet here they are before him.
As the book goes on, we see Turtle slowly but steadily try to form a resistance movement against Darkstalker. He had been watching and eventually found himself alone with Qibli and Winter. Winter, who was still heavily under the "Darkstalker is good :))))" spell, refused to listen as Turtle told them about it. Qibli, who wasn't affected, understood. For one of the first times ever, Turtle used his magic for another. Well, he also enchanted Kinkajou's skyfire so that she would be almost invisible to Darkstalker, but that would require me spending two seconds thinking about where that scene leads to (the love spell) and I'd rather not.
Anywho, Turtle is still insecure and afraid, but he's slowly becoming more sure of himself. He knows Darkstalker is evil and he wants to take him down. He's deeply afraid of him though, as he knows Darkstalker will kill him. He still feels useless and scared.
Until finally he has to act.
Anemone, coaxed by Darkstalker into doing this, goes off to kill Queen Coral and her entire family. Anemone is convinced this is what she deserves after being a terrible mother. Suddenly, Turtle realizes that his little mistake of giving Anemone god powers now has consequences and his family is going to die.
The guilt he feels is immense, but he needs to stand up. He can't sit idly anymore and let the world pass him by. He needs to stop her. He's the only one who can match her power. He has to fight her. He has to warn everyone. He has to do something heroic and terrifying.
He confronts Anemone on the beach. For the first time, he stands up for himself. He doesn't back down when she barks at him and demands he leaves. She tries to kill him, only for him to finally reveal himself. He's admitting to his mistakes. His guilt. He knows that she's not going to have a good reaction. Yeah so Anemone then tries to kill him via animus magic. The pair fight, with Turtle wining in the end.
Yada yada the book ends with Turtle having his magic taken away, but over the course of the book (as well as bleeding into DOD), Turtle has grown significantly in terms of his fears and anxieties. He's able to make a stand for himself and actively try to make things better. He's scared and still socially awkward, but he's, well, a hero in some semblance. Something he thought was the most terrifying thing possible for him he does.
Turtle is a naturally kind and considerate soul. He wants to help others, and when he does hurt them it eats away at his heart. He's afraid of conflict and prefers to be a doormat if it means he can slip through the cracks and come out unscathed.
Through the books however, he grows into a more upstanding and confident character. He's less prone to self-deprecation and letting others take advantage of him. He doesn't let things pass by and get himself into terrible situations through in-action. Through the support of his friends (and going through traumatizing scenario after traumatizing scenario) he is marginally better. Not fixed, but good enough to be happy and still the same, socially awkward but incredibly kind Turtle.
He's a character who I think a lot of people can see themselves in, and his arc in particular is one I feel many should aspire to. To stand up for themselves. To mend and fix the mistakes they've made and try to do better. Problems can't be fixed by some other hero. You have to take initiative. Stand up. Be the hero you need.
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THE GENERAL NEEDS A BREAK… AND A MOONCAKE
PAIRING. jing yuan x gn!reader
SUMMARY. the general is drowning in work, and the mid-autumn festival is the perfect excuse to take a break.
SOF'S NOTE. i know it's late but i wanted to get this out still hehe hope you still enjoy the moon festival cuteness even though i missed it xD i've been in a jing yuan mood lately ngl i just wanna cuddle and have a lazy day with him :> pls enjoy!!
You knew autumn was in the air as you walked down the streets of the Exalting Sanctum with a bag of fried songlotus roots from a nearby vendor. The trees carefully scattered throughout the streets were now vibrant shades of orange and yellow; you could feel the crisp wind blowing around you.
And while you were able to enjoy your time outside work, visiting the bustling Mid-Autumn Fesitval in Aurum Alley, you knew the general was not.
In fact, you hadn’t seen your partner in days now because of how busy he has been lately. You weren’t even sure if he managed to escape work within the past week.
With a sigh, you sadly munched on another songlotus root. That simply wouldn’t do.
You understood Jing Yuan was busy trying to keep the Preceptors out of his hair while dealing with the threat of the Stellaron on the Xianzhou. And while you knew how important it was, you also knew Jing Yuan could delegate some of his tasks. He could free up just a bit of time to enjoy the festival before it came to an end for the year.
As you approached the Seat of Divine Foresight, you were determined to accomplish just that— Get the general to come along and explore Aurum Alley with you.
“How are you doing, General?” you drawled, walking over to his desk and peeking behind his stacks of papers.
He blinked blearily before a small smile formed on his face at the sight of you. “Why, I’m having the time of my life. And you?”
You went around to his seat and gave him a brief kiss in greeting. Your hand cupped his cheek as you smoothed the dark circles under his eyes. Jing Yuan sighed and leaned into you touch.
“I’m doing well,” you said. “Would be better if you could attend the festival with me.”
He chuckled at that.
“I know you must be having so much fun working, but I promise I can make your Mid-Autumn Festival experience even better than this,” you sang, plucking the pen from his hands and placing it flat on his desk.
“You certainly drive a tempting offer.”
“Then accept.”
“Perhaps I will.”
You cheered as he laughed, setting his papers aside and standing up follow you out. Like the gentleman he was, Jing Yuan extended his hand out for you to hold. You accepted graciously and the two of you walked hand-in-hand out of his office and to Aurum Alley.
It was a long walk, but time always felt short with Jing Yuan. Minutes passed by too quickly and you found yourself always wanting to spend more time with him.
Night had come by the time you arrived in Aurum Alley, and you had just made it in time to see the lanterns lighting up the sky. The warm, twinkling lights of the lanterns lit up the dark night, planting a seed of awe in you as you watched the festivities happily. You felt a stare pointed in your direction and you knew it was Jing Yuan looking at you in admiration.
You turned back to him and tapped his chin upwards. “You should be ogling at the lanterns, not me!”
“Can a man not do both?”
With a giggle, you rested your head against his chest. He was warm and inviting, and you were glad he could escape his life as the general for just a little bit to enjoy this scenery with you.
“Have you tried Tall Auntie’s mooncakes this year?” you asked, feeling your stomach grumble as you took in the delicious scents around you. “I swear, it tastes even better than before!”
“I have not.” Jing Yuan shook his head, tucking your hand back into the safety of his own. “Shall we go?”
You nodded and skipped along, excited to have another one of her mooncakes. While mooncakes could be found everywhere, in all parts of the galaxy, Tall Auntie added the Luofu touch. The filling had a mixture of red bean paste and custard made from puffergoat milk— You almost drooled at the thought.
Noticing the dreamy look on your face, Jing Yuan laughed. He wiped the corner of your lip, eyes bright with amusement. “You have something here.”
So, perhaps you did drool at the thought.
Smiling sheepishly, you wiped at your mouth. “I suppose I’m craving it now. You’ll love it too, trust me.”
“I’m certain I will.”
As the two of your approached Tall Auntie’s food stall, you ordered two specialty mooncakes and found a secluded area to munch on them. There was a bench surrounded by trees and buildings, with a view of the lanterns growing smaller and smaller in the sky, and you thought it was a perfect place to enjoy your snack.
“What do you think?” you said, eagerly watching him take the first bite.
Jing Yuan closed his eyes in contentment, leaning back against the wall. For a moment, he said nothing. He simply chewed, savoring each flavor as it hit his tongue. When he swallowed, he opened his eyes and nodded at you. “Delicious.”
You beamed and he ruffled the top of your head.
“It’s just what I needed after a long week of work.”
“You deserve it,” you said, leaning your head on his shoulder. “Even the hardworking general deserves a break.” You took a bite of your pastry and hummed in contentment. “And a mooncake.”
Jing Yuan nodded in agreement, shutting his eyes and allowing his heavy body to relax into your touch. “Thank you for bringing me here.”
“Anytime. And after, we’re going straight home and sleeping in bed.”
His eyes opened at that, a teasing crinkle on his nose. “I propose we partake in some other activities in bed before we sleep tonight.”
You laughed at his boldness, glancing around to make sure no one else heard. “Jing Yuan!”
“My love,” he replied.
The warmth in your heart grew as you snuggled against him once more. “Okay, but only if you get me another mooncake first.”
“You have a deal.”
#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x reader#jing yuan x reader#jing yuan#hsr#honkai star rail#hsr imagines#hsr fanfiction#honkai star rail x you
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