#i'm thinking we restart their history

[ask-thebrothers-kaiba]

“This is fucking bullshit.”

"I'm going to ask you to repeat that. Make your next choice of words wise."

What was this woman's problem?

[oathkeeper-of-tarth]

Time for a long Aylin ramble, because I haven't indulged in a while.

I'm actually really invested in Aylin being an aasimar! I do not think it is a misnomer or mistake, as I've seen people suggest. She was referred to as a celestial explicitly in some older builds of the game, but this was changed at some point during development. And I noted aasimar enjoyer Oath, quelle surprise prefer it this way for a variety of reasons. Primarily, I think, because it lets her be larger than life, have a touch of that other-worldliness and otherness, while keeping her very much "of this world" still, very (physically and otherwise) present and part of the prime material plane, and ultimately far more human than I believe even she herself would sometimes like to be.

To bring up the most basic and rules/mechanics-bound "creature type" level of categorisation, as an aasimar she is a humanoid, and not a celestial - outsider. Her outsider status is absolutely there and a goldmine of things to explore, but that's a different post sitting in my drafts for far too long that I'll get around to one of these days (but for now you should read this post that I love). Yes, she is in a very real sense above it all, she will outlast everyone around her and whatever she gets involved with. We also get to see her dramatic poetic archaic speech idiosyncrasies (Ho!), her odd sense of the passage of time, and, of course, her oft-discussed and joked about apparent lack of filter or regard for current social graces.

(Endlessly amused at her just going: I'll do it when my mum tells me to.)

All things combined, Aylin feels more like a being of two worlds to me than a guest visiting this one, even as she is called the emissary of a goddess. She embodies a blending and an odd balancing act between the lofty divine and the mundane, duty and preordained purpose and personhood, and touches on the many ways this balance can be tipped. A classic D&D aasimar struggle, really, and a well I am happy to keep returning to.

Balthazar: She was a unique specimen even before I began my work. Aasimar. A god's blood united with mortal flesh.

She honestly isn't even that far from a regular aasimar stat- and ability-wise - Aylin does have several special abilities, but these are flavoured as blessings from her divine mother instead of an inherent property of her as a creature - though, notably, Aylin herself at one point claims she is always reborn because "it is [her] nature".

“Blessed with the favour of a goddess, Nightsong cannot be permanently killed. When unconscious, at the start of her turn she recovers 1 hit point.” “Nightsong will be resurrected by the powers of Selûne whenever she dies.”

Importantly, she does not get to reincarnate, or get a new body, or flit away to her "home plane" or anything like what celestials get to do. She is anchored to this one physical existence (again, very human of her), tied and limited to this one body as it painstakingly repairs itself over and over and over (to a sometimes extreme extent, e.g. the all but outright stated regrowing of amputated body parts in a frankly horrifying context), insistently and indomitably but ultimately imperfectly. And I think that's part of why the kintsugi design drives me utterly wild, why her immortality setup is more interesting to me than, say, a mutant healing factor, or something like the characters in The Old Guard. Her history is pretty literally engraved on her skin, and when she, in the role of a power-granting artefact and the object of a ritual sacrifice, tells you she will feel every wound you inflict upon her, it is so easy to believe her. And I'm not even that invested in physical suffering, just that it means it's all still very palpably there, forever, and she doesn't get to magically restart with a clean slate in this sense, nor does she get to forget past lifetimes as some creatures like devas do. It's just a flavour of immortality I personally find far more engaging than most.

(I mean, yes, I am also a known hurt/comfort sucker and if you're going there in order to set up a scene where she's, I dunno, getting doted on by Isobel who's invented new scar tissue pain relief massage techniques, you know I'm going to be all over that.)

I'm also not sure I'd say she can just pop over to Argentil to hang out with her mum at will. I mean, planeshifting is not that hard to achieve, and also she can just… ask Selûne, ultimately, I guess. But I wouldn't say she has spent much time there, and I think she takes her role as Selûne's champion and representative in the Realms too seriously and too much to heart to be away from them for very long.

Which also calls to mind the issue of the obvious and "simple" answer to Isobel's eventual death - namely that with Isobel picked up as a petitioner soul they'll all just go live out the better part of an eternity in Selûne's realm. Probably in some form they will - it's never guaranteed, but this time, yeah, probably something like that will happen, and there will be, as Melodia says, no loss, only temporary separation. But I'm really not into just handwaving or stripping away most of the mortal/immortal pairing issues inherent in the relationship. If we're going for the "hang out in a different plane of existence forever" option, I think at one point Aylin would have to "complete" her duties and lay down her sword, in a way, and pick between Faerûn and the Gates of the Moon - meaning she herself is effectively moving on to a completely new phase of her existence as well.

And while Selûne carving a lovely marble statue and bringing it to life and similar takes are fun and beautiful and interesting, I'm very invested in an Aylin who was born, raised, and had to actually grow up and learn and be trained. I have a ton of headcanons of Aylin being a weird glowy baby at some point (with all the Disney's Hercules jokes I've seen folks make, of course), being entrusted to a series of Selûnite enclaves and temples and cloisters, hounded by Shar and her agents pretty much all her life.

(Neither here nor there, but Aylin also comes off as a fairly "young" immortal to me - note that I am basing this on absolutely nothing but a general impression and there's no actual hint anywhere about how old she really is. Just vibes.)

To finish up, I'd like to shout out Isobel, and the big humanising factor she is presented as. For instance, a very concrete bit of motivation for Aylin to eventually "humanise" her perception of time, if nothing else.

Aylin without Isobel is horribly depressing to me mostly because she seems to distance herself from her humanity and err on the side of holy duty (see: her epilogue letter, ouch). And Isobel is definitely the person who (invaluably, imo) explicitly and consistently insists on Aylin's humanity and personhood, who cares for her as a woman and not a divine weapon, who actually treats her well-being as a priority, and who understands her so very well and so deeply. Who does acknowledge the gloriously resplendent Dame Aylin, daughter of the Moonmaiden herself in all her awe-inspiring presence and occasionally amusing foibles, but who never fails to look past the titles and fronts even Aylin herself is so keen to put up, and focus on what lies behind it all.

A moment that sticks out to me in particular is her bemoaning Aylin's disregard for her own safety, then actually getting very angry if you suggest Lorroakan can't hurt Aylin:

Isobel: Even after all she's been through, she thinks herself unstoppable - invincible. It all feels like recklessness to me. Player: Lorroakan can't harm her. Have faith. Isobel: He can harm her. Just as Ketheric did. She'll survive it, but she can suffer like any of us - and for longer.

Using Isobel's words verbatim is a good conclusion to my thoughts here, I think: the truth of Aylin being "singular among us all" coexisting with all the ways Aylin is "just like any of us".

And now I'll pay the cute Aylin screenshot tax one last time.

[crackhead4]

I had this idea in my head about an AU from the new transformers one movie.

So you know how the planet is made by this basically higher entity? God? Idk, and they probably knew what exactly was happening on this planet cause , well, they ARE the planet.

What happens if they weren't happy with the outcome of the end of the movie? What happens if they send some back in time with their memory intact completely? They knew exactly what happens, where everyone is like they can feel a bug on their own body. They remember the exact events that made their time line their own, even if they weren't involved in these events.

Now imagine, the obvious choice would be Optimus Prime because of the matrix and stuff, BUT now hold on, IF IT WASN'T HIM. not to like be nice to do the poor guy like noooo. I feel like this AU he should also keep his memories. However, he doesn't know that their HIS memories. That he has these very life like (or robot like?) dreams while he sleeps. He doesn't know why he has them, he doesn't know how they started, why this is only happening to him, he doesn't want to know why this look alike D-16 doesn't act like HIS D-16 and he doesn't even know why his brain ( or is it like brain panel or smth) us making up thus crazy conspiracy theory about Sentinel Prime. All he does know, however, is something in his veins ( I'm not even attempting to try and guess the robot version of veins) is telling him to stay close to HIS D-16. He probably thinks he's going crazy but is lole really good at hiding it, so he goes down to like the archeives to see what the answer is to allllll his questions and dream problem.

ANYWAY (I swerved very off topic) the mech I want to see spiral themselves in the future is D-16, not because there are probably better options like Elita or Bee or hell even Sentinel Prime would be a crazy thing to happen. I WANT TO SEE THIS MAN SUFFER, THAYS WHY.

Because just imagine how Megatron must feel after the movies, it would be perfect and so goddamn MESSY. He probably in grief with losing his best friend/lover (cause we all saw what was going on), then seeing and believing the fact that the matrix is using his dead best friend/lover's body as a way to beat him, having to battle the guilt he must feel for letting go of Orion while he battles this Optimus Prime wear that wears Orion's skin and THEN getting banished by his only home, taking over and leading a whole revolution army on the same night AND THUS (and yes that wasn't a type-o that says THUS) creating THE most depressing, heartbreaking, dramatic, bloody divorce in the history of Cybroton have ever seen.

So now you can see why I want to just pull this mindset and just plop it right back into D-16, the cogless miner. He restarts again from the very beginning, with Orion waking him up, saying he has an idea. The utter carnage and chaos that would ensue would be beyond my imagination right now at like 9:07 at night.

BUT YEAH CIRCLE BACK to the fact that I said they would remember every major event that caused their timeliness to be THEIR timeline, which would mean Megatron would remember everything that happened. He would remember Sentinel Prime's betrayal not just like D-16 but as the Primes the crime wqs committed to. He would feel it like Alphatrion, Megatronus and etc. He would feel the utter rage that Sentinel had when the matrix didn't choose him as the leader and faded right in his hands. He would feel the detach when Airachnid would feel when watching over Sentinel's shoulder and seeing exactly what he does and seeing nothing wrong with it.

HE WOULD FEEL SO MUCH AND I COUPD GO ON AND ON AND ON ABOUT, THIS BUT ANWAY-

I just really want to see what fanfic writers would make if given this prompt cause it's been on Mt mind and he'll I've thought about writing it about like inec as was like Hell no cause I know it would be atrocious to read.

Plus, I really wanted to get this idea just onto something, at least to get it out of my brain but now i don't think that's gonna happen cause now I'm gonna be daydreaming about how other people would work this story idea 😭😭.

BUT YH IF ANYONE IS GONNA MAKE THIS PLEASE TAG BE IN IT SO I COULD READ IT 🙏🙏🙏🙏

[absolutebl]

My Top 60 BLs - The Elite 10% of 600 Watched

It's happened again, another year, another 100 BLs watched. We have just tipped the BL tracking spreadsheet over into 600 BLs watched. (by moi).

SO after watching 600 BLs, here are my top 60:

Seven Days - Japan 2015 (oldest BL on this list, also holds #1 spot, cute)

We Best Love: No. 1 For You & Fighting Mr. 2nd - Taiwan 2021

Semantic Error - Korea 2022

Light On Me - Korea 2021

Until We Meet Again - Thai 2019

Our Dating Sim - Korea 2023

To My Star - Korea 2021

Color Rush 1 - Korea 2021

Old Fashion Cupcake - Japan 2022

Takara-kun and Amagi-kun - Japan 2022

Minato’s Laundromat - Japan 2022

My Beautiful Man - Japan 2021

Cherry Blossoms After Winter - Korea 2022

HIStory 2: Crossing the Line - Taiwan 2018

Cherry Magic - Japan 2020

The Eighth Sense - Korea 2023

Bad Buddy - Thai 2022

A Tale of Thousand Stars - Thai 2021

My School President - Thai 2023

Love Tractor - Korea 2023

The New Employee - Korea 2023

Oxygen - Thai 2020

Be Loved In House: I Do - Taiwan 2021

Lovely Writer - Thai 2021

He’s Coming to Me - Thai 2019

Blueming - Korea 2022

Unintentional Love Story - Korea 2023

Step By Step - Thai 2023

My Ride - Thai 2022

La Pluie - Thai 2023

Wish You - Korea 2020

Our Dining Table AKA Bokura no Shokutaku - Japan 2023

Not Me - Thai 2022

Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding - Korea 2021

Love By Chance - Thai 2018

See You After Quarantine? - Taiwan 2021

Addicted - China 2016

Long Time No See - Korea 2017

My Tooth Your Love - Taiwan 2022

Why R U? - Thai 2020

The Tasty Florida - Korea 2021

About Youth - Taiwan 2022

SOTUS - Thai 2016

DNA Says Love You - Taiwan 2022

My Love Mix Up - Japan 2021

Roommates of Poongduck 304 - Korea 2022

The Eclipse - Thai 2022

Dark Blue Kiss - Thai 2019

Oh! Boarding House - Korea 2022

My Day - Pinoy 2020

Ocean Likes Me - Korea 2022

Bed Friend - Thai 2023

Cutie Pie - Thai 2022

Life: Love on the Line - Japan 2020

Love Class - Korea 2022

Restart After Come Back Home - Japan 2020

Tinted With You - Korea 2022

2gether - Thai 2020

Choco Milk Shake - Korea 2022

Destiny Seeker - Thai 2023

600 BLs - My Top 60 Notes

Bold = 10/10 (#1 … #8)

Italics = 9/10 (#9 … #33)

everything else is 8/10 (there are more 8/10s)

These are my personal preferences. If you don't see one of your favorites there it may still have scored an 8 just not made it onto the list.

Or... I didn't like is as much as you think I should.

Relative ranking isn't fixed. I basically just asked myself which ones would I want to rewatch right... now.

Absolute BL not included because it’s parody

Love is Science? & Puppy Honey not included because BL is a B-plot

Word of Honor has been censored off the list. Fuck that noise.

The following are my top 3 shorts:

A First Love Story - Korea 2021

Just Friends? - Korea 2009 (would have been the oldest on the list)

Some More - Korea 2018

This is as of the Aug 2023.

Not responsible for any additional awesome BLs that have aired since then.

Next up... 700 BLs. Expect me to do this again - next year. Unless I'm dead of course.

(Here's the last time I did this.)

[and-the-times-we-had]

As a somewhat newer member of the Silmarillion fandom (I've been here for two years but compared to a lot of people I've come across that seems pretty recent to me) I'm not entirely familiar with the history of arguments and discourse in this fandom but I feel like I know enough at this point to have thoughts about it. I know it's there because I've seen discourse posts on here as old as 2011. I know the feanorians v lathrim/Thingol's line discourse in particular has a nasty history (including fans verbally attacking other fans) and I know that this fandom has had an issue with misogyny in regards to female characters (and even more importantly in regards to female fans).

I just have to wonder when we as a fandom and as individuals in the fandom are going to make the choice to stop doing this. Because it seems like it's been going on an awfully long time, and it comes back in cycles. And because of that, every time someone new comes into the fandom and says anything even vaguely adjacent to that discourse (and others), someone who has been around longer and experienced that discourse inevitably jumps down their throat about their take. A take that is clearly not connected back to that old discourse given that they are new to the fandom. A take that they most likely came up with while engaging with the text themselves (yes, even if it sounds similar to a take you've seen before. of course it is. We're all working off the same text/story).

How is this in any way welcoming or helpful? All it serves to do is drive away new fans who do not want that drama, add tension to a space that should be fun, restart the discourse that people say they are tired of seeing but do absolutely nothing to stop, and make it difficult to have any interesting discussions without worrying about inadvertently causing drama.

I've been in a lot of fandoms and been involved in discourse before (even in this fandom to an, in my opinion, limited extent) so I'm in no way going to say I'm above it but like, aren't you guys tired of this? Because I am. I'm tired of feeling like I'm going to be lambasted every time I post something. That's no way to engage with a hobby as far as I'm concerned. I could choose to leave the fandom out of the sheer level of frustration I feel about this, but there are still lots of things that I like, and honestly, I don't really want to. I dont think I've ever felt as creative or engaged in thinking analytically about the source materials in my fandom as I have in this one. I just want the fandom to be a generally more positive experience for myself and others.

I'm going to do my best to not contribute to the discourse issue and while I can't tell anyone else what to do, I hope you guys might also take a few moments to think the next time a post you disagree with comes across your dash or you see it in the tag. If nothing else, can we please avoid bashing other fans during the course of the discourse? It sucks to see the characters we like questioned/disliked/villainized/etc, but it sucks even more to be an actual person being bashed and told that they shouldn't even be able to consider themselves fans because they don't agree with your take on the text.

Can we just try to be better about this? Please?

[rosetterer]

people have been saying for literal years that they wanted buck to "explore his bisexuality" and have hot sexual encounters with man to "find out what he likes", and so many have wanted buck to revisit his good old buck 1.0 manwhore days, and now they are upset that he is absolutely thriving being a bisexual kinky whore for his kinky daddy boyfriend!!!!! lmfao i hope they start s8 with a cold open of buck and tommy fucking on screen fr, tommy's hand choking buck, buck calling tommy daddy 🕯️🕯️🕯️

Love the horny energy, anon lol 💕

What I hate is that people act like Buck has to date a bunch of guys to "explore his bisexuality" like no. He has dated plenty of women and now he's dating Tommy. It's not like the relationship counter restarts the moment you date another sex. Just like the women before Tommy, he has the chance to be the one for him. Buck would've been bisexual even if he only ever dated women but realized his attraction toward men. He will still be bisexual if he ends up with a man. And he DOES NOT need to date more men for his relationship with a man to be counted as real or serious or something that can last. You know what I mean? 😅

Sorry, I'm using your anon ask to rant 😆😆

We all know that if it's wasn't tommy in that scene but.... someone else.... this wouldn't be an issue. That's why I refuse to take any of those takes seriously. You're upset your ship didn't happen or you don't like kink, that's fine. Perfectly splendid. Just try not to make it into some ethical or moral issue when it's not that. And some people are genuinely bordering on homophobia. It's not cute. Buck and Tommy are in a relationship whether you like it or not and yes, they will talk/joke about this type of stuff. They're also having sex *GASP*

Also, if you don't know the history of lgbtq+ community and kink, read up on it pls.

I hope that Buck and Tommy will continue to thrive.

(Also, if you would've been okay with a scene if it was your ship but you're not because it wasn't... think about it a little harder and maybe you'll get somewhere.)

[bengiyo]

23.5 Degrees Ep 3 Stray Thoughts

Last time, the school allowed them to restart the astronomy club, but many students believe in the superstitious rumors about the club, and refused to join. Ongsa and Sun joined the club, and Luna was eventually able to convince Aylin to join. Ongsa continued to fret over lying about her online identity to Sun, and ridiculously threw her phone away in the garbage. However, after much strife, she got her phone back and reconnected with Sun in her Earth persona. Meanwhile, it seems that Mawin may have a crush on Tinh. We left at Ton saying he and Ongsa dated before, and now I am working on my gameplan about how Euro can still win and be paired with AJ. I am also shipping the teachers.

Three days? Does Ton really get around that much??

Ton is so much. Oh my god.

I tell you these kids stay filming each other in ways I am not comfortable with. I am glad I came of age before this era of surveillance because I would not have survived.

Classic gay behavior: managing an organization’s finances to be closer to your crush.

Sorry, Ongsa. Now all of Thailand thinks you’re straight.

Blossom, what does Ongsa’s romantic history have to do with your debt? You better pay what you owe!

23.5 please don’t let me down on Mawin. Big Gay Boys need love, too!

Oh, Mawin, are you really ready to face the consequences of rule breaking for dick?

I’m invested in Aylin’s search for connection.

Hold on! Sun is a sports gay!

I am never going to complain about a silly pratfall in this genre. That’s a requirement.

This poor dog always looks like he’s hot.

They really didn’t think this sneaking into school thing through once the school president’s cousin was interested.

They really let Tinh film them breaking school rules. How silly is that.

The sisterhood of the traveling pants has arrived at the school.

Wow. They really fell on each other twice this week.

Look at the security guard being reasonable.

Ton is too much.

For a second I thought they were going to throw the teacher over the balcony to his death.

Hiding in a closet? It’s where many of us first meet and connect.

The finger touch with the light in the background was a really nice touch (ha!).

Alpha is a real one. She's maintaining discipline and giving her boy a shot with Tinh at the same time.

I don't know if Blossom should be feeling smug with the state of her game. At least she's being a good sport.

"Every girl would be into you if you were a guy." Sun, sidebar.

Oh ho! Chaoren knows about Ongsa's crush. She seems like she meddles. This is good for us.

I'm having a lot of fun with this. I was chatting with @ginnymoonbeam earlier when I had to pause about how specific this show feels for the lesbian experience and how that gaze is impacting even the male stories. I love how effectively Milk is playing a loser, and a lot of the GMMTV boys should be taking notes.

[macgyvermedical]

can you maybe tell us about the history of trans healthcare? I'm writing a trans character in an old west setting and don't know exactly what would be available to her

So this is a really cool question.

There have been (what we would today call) transgender and gender-non-conforming people as far back as we have records that can describe them. Depending on where in the world a person was and what culture they belonged to, being trans or gender-non-conforming may have been something lived openly, or it may have been something more hidden.

This makes it difficult to cover all of trans history in one tumblr post, so I'll focus on 2 things- trans history during the western expansion (the time between 1803 and 1893 across what is now the western USA, often referred to as the "old west" "wild west" or "frontier"), and trans healthcare access as it is recorded in the USA.

So first let's talk a little about trans people on the frontier.

[Trans Woman of the Frontier: Mrs. Nash]

Simply put, there were a lot of them. Or, at least, there were a lot more of them living on the frontier than there were on the east coast. Many accounts tend to be of what we today would call trans men. Earlier, historians often brushed their existence off as a practicality- If a woman wanted a decent-paying job on the range, of course they would change their name, wear men's clothing, and act as a man.

But this doesn't explain the fact that many of them lived their personal lives as men too, often taking wives and continuing to live lives as men even after being arrested multiple times for cross dressing, or after the conclusion of their career. Look up "Harry Allen" if you want a real man's man on the frontier.

In fact, today one of the reasons historians think there were more trans people out west was because news of these arrests often made it back to the east coast. Closeted trans people reading these (often sensationalized) stories were essentially promised a life and future on the frontier with people like them- a life and future they could move and restart easily if they happened to be, you know, arrested for transness.

It also doesn't explain the trans women. While there are fewer records of trans women on the frontier, they did exist. And since women could typically hide more easily assuming they had an understanding husband (or beard), that kind of makes sense. Look up "Mrs. Nash" who worked as a laundress and took 3 husbands over her lifetime. She was only outed as trans upon her death.

Long story short, it would be very historically accurate to have a trans person on the frontier, and while it might have been reasonable to assume they could make a life there, officially transness wasn't particularly well accepted by the establishment.

Trans healthcare on the frontier was unfortunately not really a thing beyond what today we would call social transition- the adoption of new clothing, a new name, and new speech patterns.

This was because the first medical transition care wouldn't occur until 1918 in Germany and wouldn't move to the US until the 1940s, half a century after the frontier was declared closed.

In 1922 the first successful gender-affirming surgery was performed. It was an orchiectomy (removal of the testes) on a woman named Dora Richter in Germany.

In 1931 Dora completed her transition with several more successful surgeries. This was also the year Lili Elbe (of The Danish Girl fame) passed away from infection related to a gender affirming surgery (why did they decide to tell her story instead of Dora's?? Dora literally worked in trans healthcare for most of her career??).

Anyway. In the 1940's Dr. Alfred Kinsey began his study of human sexuality and gender in Indiana, USA. He was the first person to use the term "transsexual", which gave a name to the experience of someone who's gender did not align with their sex assigned at birth.

Hormone therapy in the US was introduced by Dr. Henry Benjamin sometime in the 1950s, along with the first US citizens travelling to Europe to complete gender affirming surgeries. Dr. Benjamin published the first papers on hormone therapy in 1967, prompting the openings of about 40 "gender clinics" throughout the US. Unfortunately, many of these clinics provided gender-affirming care in name only- the larger ones (like the Johns Hopkins Gender Identity Clinic) getting over 100 applications per year for surgical interventions, but providing only about 5-7 per year after a rigorous process of proving one's transgender status.

By the late 1960's and early 1970's, many US trans people were choosing to circumvent the larger medical centers and either going abroad or using smaller specialty clinics that could do surgeries more discreetly and were less interested in the research value of trans people.

In 1979, many of the larger gender clinics shut down after a paper (with very poor methodology) stated that trans people were no better off mentally after transition. This, though awful, sparked Dr. Benjamin to start the organization that would become the World Professional Association for Transgender Health, which publishes the standards by which gender affirming patients are treated today.

After this point, clinics slowly rebuilt. From a low of 2-3 in the mid 1990s to hundreds of clinics open today. The Johns Hopkins' clinic reopened in 2016.

R E F E R E N C E S

[selnyam]

People I want to get to know better

Tagged by @sylaurin

tagging @sparrowsong-7 @catwhoisawizard, @the-littlest-kojin, and @hazelkjt and anyone else that wants to!

Last Song: Jolene but it's gay by Reinaeiry it's on my work playlist and was the last one I heard before leaving Favorite Color: Red or Black! (i say even though I'm Red/green colourblind) Currently Watching: oh i don't know. We just finished watching all of Adventure Time, I think I might finally restart Symphogear. Last Movie: what was the last movie i watched? I think it was some low budget horror movie we streamed. Sweet/Spicy/Savory: I have a sweet tooth. but I also love my SPICE. As evident by the scorpion pepper sauce I use. Relationship Status: Married to an amazing spouse, also have a few amazing and wonderful partners who I love dearly!! Current Obsessions: Flidais of course as always, and her being a gay disaster romancing women all across the world. Oh and reconnecting with her daughters! Last Thing In My Search History: "Second Nature by Jae" because I was looking for the cover of the lesbian shapeshifter romance novel I was telling a friend about

[gafurtle]

Reading Meme

What’s up readers?! How about a little show and tell? Answer these 13 questions, tag 13 lucky readers and if you’re feeling extra bookish add a shelfie! Let’s Go!

Tagged by @lucymonster - thank you!

1. The last book I read

I'm rereading The Murderbot Diaries (again...), so I just finished Book 3 and am now reading Book 4.

2. A book I recommend

I mean...I always love when people try out the Cosmere, or I've been recommending Gideon the Ninth to people lately.

3. A book I couldn't put down

I started the Murderbot Diaries because @round-hatches-are-terrifying kept posting about it and I was going on a trip with a long flight and needed something to read. So I started the first book...and more or less read all seven books nonstop over the next week. Like, I had to take breaks because I was on the trip visiting family and we did things all day, but pretty much every spare moment I was reading...and then I just restarted it immediately. Twice. So, uh. That one.

4. A book I've read twice (or more)

I reread books a lot. I've read most of the Cosmere series twice, and I'm working on my third read-through of the Stormlight Archive. I've read the Locked Tomb books twice. I've read the Discworld books over and over again too. I mean, when I really like a series, rereading feels like I get to hang out with the characters more, so I reread a LOT.

5. A book on my TBR

I have GOT to read White Sands. It's the only Cosmere book that eludes me. I need to get my butt to a library and check it out because I tried reading it on my phone and it was terrible.

6. A book I've put down

I've had some bad luck in the past with starting a book on a trip and then not finishing it and then a lot of time passes and I just never go back. I did that with Dune, I know. And a book with clockwork birds in the title I think? My brother really wanted me to read that, but I just fell out of the habit and it felt hard to go back. I did that with Life of Pi too.

7. A book on my wish list

Like to buy? I'm not sure what differentiates TBR and wish list. Oh! I guess the Murderbot short stories? I don't know how to get them ha ha. And I really look forward to when Stormlight 5 and Alecto the Ninth come out.

8. A favorite book from childhood

The Dark is Rising series. A book I loved so much that I am too afraid to go back because what if it is terribe.

9. A book you would give to a friend

I loaned Tress of the Emerald Sea to a friend recently! Honestly, I'd like to loan out the Secret Project Sanderson books since they're an easier in to the Cosmere.

10. A book of poetry or lyrics that you own

I was a classics major, so I have a lot of Greek & Latin poetry on my shelves. Other than that, I've never been into reading poetry, to be honest.

11. A nonfiction book that you own

More classics books, I'm afraid. Like I have histories and books of scholarships and textbooks and all of that.

12. What are you currently reading

The Murderbot Diaries. Again. 😅 Exit Strategy, probably my favorite!

13. What are you planning on reading next

T-The rest of the Murderbot Diaries.... And then soon Stormlight 5 will be out! And one of these days I'm going to get the library and try to get White Sand...

Tagging @round-hatches-are-terrifying and @interstellar-interloper my mbd buds. I'd be curious to hear from @cosmereplay and @imtheseventh and @zibus if you folks are interested too! @spikeface if you want!

[cookies-and-music]

Ghost. - part 15: Compromised

My suggestion for this chapter is Rehab by Amy Winehouse,

Part 1 here - part 16 here

PAIRING: TVA!LokixOC

TAG LIST: @kats72 ; @mischief2sarawr ; @m3ntally-unstable

SUMMARY: Loki meets sombody at the TVA he once knew. Unfortunately she doesn't seem to remember him.

The first problem with Yggdrasil was the fact that in no document and no story had there ever been written about a god trapped within it. Thousands of timelines and countless books all led to the same point: "It's just a damn tree!" She threw a book off the desk under Mobius' shocked gaze.

"Are you talking about..."

"That. That damn thing." Lydia wanted to bang her head against the desk. "It doesn't matter how many books I read, how many papers I examine."

"Maybe you should look for something different," Mobius suggested calmly.

"And what?! Do you think I haven't looked for variations of the same damn tree?" She got up from the desk. "Even an infinite number of universes follow the same damn laws. It doesn't matter what you call it, with all the knowledge in the world at our disposal, it's still just a damn tree!" Lydia shouted on the verge of tears.

"A rose by any other name would smell as sweet," Mobius sighed, turning a page.

"Oh, don't start with the damn Shakespeare quotes," she leaned back in her chair. "You know where you can shove your-

"Lydia," Mobius stopped her before she could say something she'd surely regret. He used a firm tone in such cases, and Lydia secretly thanked him for it, as her mind was a hurricane and his voice grounded her.

"Sorry," she took a deep breath, bowing her head.

"You need a break; you've been thinking about nothing but this for months."

"But Mobius, how can I if he-"

"You're compromised."

Lydia didn't respond because it was true. He had said so before.

"If I could, I'd take you off the case, but this isn't an official case, and making your life difficult wouldn't stop you from doing your things anyway," Mobius massaged his temple with a finger. "So I'm asking you to take a break, think about something else. Anything else, I really don't care what," he said with a bitter laugh that betrayed his exhaustion.

Lydia closed her eyes, nodding. The first thing to do when hitting a dead end was to step away from the case and think about something else, then come back to it. But she just couldn't.

"You're right," she swallowed before grabbing the jacket draped over the chair. "I'm going to the café. Do you want anything?"

"I want you to have some chamomile tea."

He managed to make her laugh before she walked away.

Mobius understood her frustration and shook his head because Lydia was right, even with all the knowledge in the world at their disposal, it was still just a damn tree. That had always existed and always would.

"All the knowledge in the world..." Mobius murmured to himself, "at our disposal..."

All the written knowledge of the world. Damn the TVA and the arrogance of everyone working there.

---

Lydia was an excellent agent, Mobius knew this. That's why he had fought with the council to get her promoted from consultant to analyst. Not that he had ever told anyone. The slight workplace rivalry that united them had made the days stimulating while the world was falling apart.

But at that moment, Lydia wasn't there to question his theories when they didn't hold up. She was imprisoned by her own emotions in a dark cell of her mind, compromised. And thus, she wouldn't be of any use to anyone.

Mobius had decided that to get anything from her, he would have to get her as far away from the TVA as possible, clear her mind, and restart her system.

"Why are we here?" Lydia crossed her arms.

"Because we need some fresh air," Mobius smiled at the lady as he picked up the two tickets.

"At the Natural History Museum?" She raised an eyebrow.

"So what? Loki said you liked history," Mobius walked toward the entrance.

"Loki talked about me?"

"Constantly," Mobius rolled his eyes, and Lydia smiled, sadly, but she smiled. "Anyway, relax, let's take a walk. Think of it this way, everything is stable, the TVA is stable, Loki is stable, there's no need to rush."

"But not time to waste either," Lydia huffed.

"It's not a waste of time. You know what is a waste of time? Rushing to reach the destination, falling, and having to go to the hospital, if you get what I mean."

Lydia didn't respond.

They walked around the museum, and after a few minutes, Mobius said something incorrect, triggering Lydia's need to prove herself.

"It was 1732, not 35."

"Really...?"

From there, Lydia went into encyclopedia mode. She had so many things to say, but also to discover, about each room in the museum that after a couple of hours, when they reached the Norse wing, Mobius couldn't take it anymore.

"The runes of this type are about Odin who, according to legend, held onto Yggdrasil for three days and three nights to absorb its knowledge."

"Oh, finally!" Mobius exclaimed, spreading his arms.

"Finally, what?" Lydia turned, confused.

"Are you serious?"

She shrugged, and he burst into laughter.

"You are really, really compromised," he shook his head. "Repeat what you just said, slowly."

Lydia frowned.

"Odin... held onto... Yggdrasil for three days and three nights..." With each part of the phrase spoken by Lydia, Mobius nodded with the smile of someone about to punch her. "to absorb its knowledge..."

They stared at each other for a moment before Lydia's gears started working again.

"Oh my god! Odin held onto Yggdrasil for three days and three nights to absorb its knowledge!" Lydia exclaimed, but after a moment, her enthusiasm faded.

"But Mobius, we've examined almost every piece of paper in the TVA library, there's nothing."

"Just because it's not written doesn't mean it isn't there."

"But we also have the communication transcripts," she shook her head.

"But knowledge can go beyond that. In this case, it can be absorbed. If it's never told to anyone, nor shown, nor written," Mobius listed on his fingers, "there's only one place it can be."

"Odin's mind."

OFFICIALLY BACK BITCHES. AS PROMISED THAT WAS NOT THE END.

I'D LIKE TO THINK OF THIS AS A SECOND SEASON, IN WHICH MOBIUS MA BOI WILL PLAY A GREAT ROLE AND LOKI WILL APPEAR SOONER THAN YOU THINK

AS USUAL, THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO READS

CHEERS

[zalrb]

we already talked a bit about this in private, but now that you had some time to think about it, i think you might be able to give a more detailed response so here's my question - do you think bojack losing diane was enough of a consequence for him? how do you feel about his dynamic with diane vs pc?

1. This will be long and all over the place since I'm writing my thoughts in real time. Because of the 30-image limit, I'll probably answer this in two posts.

2. OK so, as you know, I'm not in the Bojack fandom, I just watched the series for the first time and finished it a couple of days ago and we've been talking about my impressions and you've been sharing trivia with me so my view feels like it's probably an unpopular opinion especially because what you indicate

is certainly meant to be illustrated. I'm not saying that it's narratively untrue because it isn't, I just don't believe it the way that I should because while I was watching the show, I was like Diane's relationship to Bojack is like a 2.0 version of his relationship with PC

and so I became interested in what it would've meant if the person he "lost" at the end of the series was PC because I do think that would've been an appropriate and big enough emotional consequence for him and his actions and I do think it would've been more narratively resonant. So, you wanted me to expand a bit more on the 2.0/two sides of the same coin thing and why I thought PC and Bojack were more "entwined" than him and Diane -- I'll do this part in another post.

There are just a few things I don't think we can ignore, like the 23-year history between Bojack and PC because, of course, knowing someone for a long time doesn't automatically mean that your relationship with that person means more or is more profound than someone you met later but while I was watching the show, I did draw parallels

or things like

that made me go, I don't think his relationship with Diane is more profound either or that he treats her with more reverence in a genuine way, I just think he knew her for six years

while he knew PC for over two decades

and he's restarting a cycle.

even the way that Bojack would leave drunken, long-winded messages on Diane's voicemail parallels the way that he would drunkenly show up on PC's lawn.

To be fair, I don't think we can ignore the way in which Bojack expects the people in his life, particularly women, in general to emotionally labour for him. PC says it herself, "You want a mommy you can slide your dick in and out of" and we could of course talk about the cyclical nature of his self-hatred which can then create the same type of relationships with other people in general, over and over, and obviously because Diane and PC are different people, their relationships to Bojack aren't exactly the same. There are similarities between them with how they get sucked into Bojack's orbit

but they do respond to him differently, one major difference being that Bojack and Diane never had sex and were never together romantically but that again reinforces to me that they're two sides of the same coin

even the way that Bojack desperately begs Diane to tell him that he's a good person

is just the other side of Bojack lashing out at Princess Carolyn for making him feel like he's a bad person

and both instances sprout from him thinking that they know him too well and while some of the scenes with Princess Carolyn happen after they happen with Diane, they're also contextualized by their long history.

So, for me, while obviously he has two separate relationships with each character and while obviously the Original Relationship(s) Bojack has is with Beatrice (and Butterscotch), which impacts all of the relationships he has afterwards, I ended up looking at his relationship with Diane through the lens of his relationship with Princess Caroyln, which made Princess Carolyn and her relationship with Bojack the more narratively compelling and why I ended up with this as my takeaway

because I actually thought that it had already been established that Diane moved on and coming back to that in the finale felt like an unnecessary rehash but more importantly, what Bojack said about Princess Carolyn was right, I do believe that she was this person in his life and had been for nearly thirty years

“You're the little plastic table they put in pizza boxes to keep the pizza from getting smushed."

and to have that table removed, would've been emotionally resonant and a well-earned consequence that also isn't a punishment, it's just life.

I don't know if any of this makes sense.

[absolutebl]

hi there 🖐🏼 what are your recs for bl movies with great acting?

BL Movies with GREAT Acting

Specifically Movies? Do KBLs that were cut into movies count? Hum, I'm gonna make a judgement call given how few actual movies I have to work with and say if it holds as a "movie going experience" I can count it. I should say in order to really push this into the superlative acting space the BL aspect on many of these is... light.

His

Japan 2020 Viki

His is about being a grown adult and still struggling with coming out as gay. It addresses the consequences of life choices disingenuous to identity. Nagisa turns up on Shun’s doorstep with his precocious daughter in tow. This is a touch confusing to Shun since they were each others first love and ended badly. Shun has retreated from society, rejecting the world before it can reject him, already brokenhearted because without Nagisa he never had a reason to fight. Nagisa went the opposite way, tried to pretend to be something he was not and ended up with a daughter he adores and a wife who hates him. The acting is killer, Miyazawa Hio is sulky in the best possible way, the filming is beautiful and the setting unique and interesting...

I'm not wild about the ending. Moody arthouse smackdoodle is going to pretend that "ambiguous" is somehow unique and special rather than bog standard commonplace for narratives of this type. But endings are my hangup, not yours?

This is not really BL (the prequel was), so few of the tropes are used. You do not need to have watched the prequel.

Your Name Engraved Herein

Taiwan 2020 Netflix

This movie is fantastic but it is also seriously depressing. It’s a self acceptance journey that goes emotionally array on the alter of history, but if you wanna wallow in high quality acting and serious gay drama, this’ll do it. I would say it's not really BL, no real trope drops at all.

Okay those two I chose more on the strength of the acting than BL. These others are not going to be at the same standard/style.

If you want moee of the above level of drama, things get very sad in the BL world, so Love of Siam, Dew, Eternal Yesterday, Goodbye Mother, etc...

Restart After Come Back Home (Risutato wa tadaima no ato de)

Japan 2020 Gaga?

Atmospheric study in rural Japan meets complex family dynamics built on a romance framework of city boy meets country boy, grumpy/sunshine. It’s beautiful and icy sweet. Slow moving in places but ultimately worth the patience, low heat, low angst, and stunning. The acting is a touch stiff, in that Japanese reserved way.

This is the only BL movie, as a movie, that I could pull. There are others, I jsut don't think the acting is good enough.

So here are some highly rated short bingable series that are movie length (1.5-2.5 hours) but not really movies - BUT with killer acting. So they still might satisfy the itch. I places them in order of acting and filming quality, not my own personal preference.

From Japan

Old Fashion Cupcake

Tokyo in April is...

Life: Love on the Line (director's cut)

My Beautiful Man

I Cannot Reach You

Seven Days

From Taiwan

Red Balloon

We Best Love (esp part 2)

About Youth

HIStory 2: Crossing the Line

From Korea

To My Star

Long Time No See

The New Employee

Where Your Eyes Linger

More like this?

I want to shout out The Eighth Sense here too. It's longer than movie length but so well acted.

(source)

[thebestofoneshots]

I'm honestly so exited for the next chapter of GC!!!

If you had any advice for anyone wanting to write a maurauders fic what would it be?

THE INTERLUDE PT. 2

Hey Darling! I think my advice to anyone who wants to write, not just fanfiction for the Marauders, but anything in general, is that you must do three things:

Pay attention to your surroundings

This one is important because there are stories developing around us at all times, and these stories can be both inspiring and insightful. You have to look at people. But to really look at them. How does sadness look? How does desperation? What about happiness and excitement? What about love?

Paying close atention to the way people react to things, to the way their faces move and to the way they try to stop them from it, is what gives you a real outlook on all these things and helps you with the classic "show don't tell" aspect of writing. (You can also fo this by watching movies, it doesn't have to be just real people).

Sometimes what I do, is very much like method acting. What I mean by this is that I try to feel my character's emotions in my own body so I can write their reactions, did they furrow their brows? Did they shed a tear or two? Sometimes it takes a heavy toll, but personally. I like living the story as I write it.

Read a LOT

Now, I've got dyslexia and I'm a slow as fuck when reading, but still, I try to read as much as I can, especially now, I've been reading a lot of old classics, the likes of Frankenstein, Dracula, The Picture of Dorian Grey, Midsummer Night's Dream, and even some other not so classics like The Secret History.

I'm currently reading The Brothers Karamazov and I especially pay attention to new vocabulary (English is not my first language but feels like it at this point) and yet, sometimes when we read we skip past words that we allude a meaning due to context but we don't actually pay atention to them.

I mean did you know the black suit with white neckline that priests use is actually called a "cassock"? I had no idea, so thank you Dostoyevsky for teaching me that. (Comes in handy for that Priest!Remus fic I'm working on, if you know what I mean).

But yes, read a lot. You know Virginia Wolf once said:

"Read a thousand books and your words will flow like a river"

And trust me, she was onto something, nowadays I find myself using words that just in 2023 I wouldn't have even thought of, and that's just like a 6 books difference. And I know some of you all are incredibly fast readers! (Someone literally read the 300K words of GC in two days, not even in my dreams would I be able to do that).

So use that to your advantage and take out your books. Or read on ePub on your phone, that works just as well. Instead of scrolling, go to your books app!

My screen time does not look like this out of coincidence.

I've made a conscious decision to stop scrolling Instagram and Pinterest so much and start reading instead. Whenever I'm waiting in the car, whenever I have a free moment, I OPEN that app and get READING. (It also helped that The Secret History is damn engaging).

Also, since the Marauders don't have much official material, I'd recommend reading more fanfiction on them, it's the only way you can get a grasp of the personality we have collectively created for them.

Start typing

And finally, all that reading, all that looking and all that feeling is going to we worth for nothing if you don't actually sit down and write. Be it on a notebook while you're in school (I used to do this a lot, I don't even know how I got such good grades), or type on your computer while you're at work and have some free time.

It's silly when writers say this, but you have to make time to write, it really is the only way to do it. Sit down, write a word, and then another, and then just keep going. You don't like the result? It doesn't matter you can write it again, scratch and restart, but you must get writing.

And finally, don't be afraid to show your work, sometimes feedback is the way to get better. I mean, beats me I didn't know "tight" and "thigh" wasn't the same thing due to dyslexia for years! And it was thanks to one of you, that I took a closer look and realised what a pitiful mistake I'd been making.

So yeah, WRITE, show your work, and get feedback from friends, family or people on the internet. That's the secret ໒꒰ྀིᵔ ᵕ ᵔ ꒱ྀི১

I might have gotten carried away with this answer lol, this is why it always takes me so much to go through my asks.

[elicathebunny]

BLOG UPDATE 🤍

LIFE UPDATE:

I've got a GCSE coming up so my efforts will be going towards studying for that. If you have been wondering why I have been disappearing on and off for longer periods it is for that reason. One day I could be posting consistently and the other I completely work off the face of the earth. Honestly, I've been so tired 🥲. I do love to write on this blog but I don't have the time like I used to. My life has completely been consumed by tests so I'm gonna have to find a way to create time for writing 😭.

STYLE:

I have been testing out styles throughout the history of this blog. From my Bratz theme to the 19-somethings and now my current pink theme. Honestly from the beginning, I have been drawn to pink but I never gave it a shot because idk 🙄. Let's see how long I will stick with this one, I think it's more fitting with my current likings.

POSTS:

Obviously, my posts are about self-improvement. Nothing much is changing my posts will still be the same. I'm not really planning to delve into any new content, all I will be doing is just focusing more on topics I already talk about.

SCHEDULE:

Currently, no schedule has been formed and probably won't be for a while. I used to post every day at the start and then I started posting every week, then every two weeks. I just post whenever now because It is more flexible, but obviously posting more helps this blog grow more. But for the sake of just being able to post, posting when I can is the best way to go.

WHAT HAPPENED/WILL HAPPEN TO @angelacademy?:

As you all know that was my first blog that I used to post on before restarting and moving on here. Because I have grown a lot here I do not feel the need to use the other account meaning it is no longer active. Although I might revive it and post other stuff on there I am unaware of what I will do with it. My old posts are still there and they probably are not very helpful, but I mean we all start somewhere right 😝. Me restarting that blog would mean all of the previous posts would be deleted, apart from the ones I see others like a lot or I find decently good.

[lookiamnotshameless]

All these Civ 7 news putting focus on your Civ Leaders being the MC rather than your civ got me thinking that Civ is honestly a great series for some sort of Hetalia mod, since you're already playing as and with immortal beings who are essentially personifying countries, and the only real difference is that they're designed after historical figures instead.

And that there was a Hetalia mod for Civ 4 (still my fav Civ in many ways!) and it was pretty glorious. I played Austria with it back in the day, and even now I'm still amused that his best strat really was 'marry someone strong so you could spam cultural projects and get a cultural victory lol'.

My fav game was this one where he spawned next to Spain, who immediately started sharing his religion and started going, 'omg your culture is so nice <3333'. Spain kept getting NOTHING to dislike Austria about which was hilarious because in Civ 4 you can gain -1 diplomacy points for really trivial reasons, it was amazing when you check the diplomacy details every time and each time there's some extra +1 point about what he liked Austria for ('your borders are so close to mine! our people are basically joined at the hips! your culture is so pretty! we're joined in the name of religion for 200 years! have I mentioned, we've known each other for 200 years???'), they start sharing a ton of economic stuff and got really rich together; somehow their agendas have a ton of synergy and if you spawn next to Spain and get the same religion as him you're basically safe since he'll like Austria immediately lol.

So Austria married Spain---entering a permanent alliance, effectively becoming one nation with two rulers---then Prussia showed up and beelined to bully him*, which was a pain in the ass because Prussia had a really strong military in the mod compared to Austria's cultural victory weakass armies. Which resulted in Spain going, don't worry BB I'm gonna beat him into the sea!!! <333333 and THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED while Austria effectively stood in the background going, do your best my love do you need a towel to wipe your sweat <33333 and it was glorious (I sent Spain a few extra knights who did nothing).

The Spaus union stood the test of time! They went into space age together, hand in hand, the most wondrous civilizations of their world, and it was great dropping by Spain every time and he'd be like hello BB what can I do for you <33333 you're so wonderful look at all your cultural wonders <33333 your music is the best <33333 awww are you giving me diamonds you're so great <333333 and when I won the game I was like '..........did I actually just play a relatively IC Spaus alt-history fix-it fic?????'

It'd be nice if these mods kept being a thing, but with Civ starting to use 3D models instead of still portraits we all know it wasn't going to happen lol.

*I think it's just a thing with Civ 4's AI making military+aggressive civs beeline for bullying cultural+economic civs----but it was funny how much Prussia would beeline to bully Austria in those games I played. To the point that if you spawn next to him, you might be better off restarting your game lmao.