#i'm sorry this is h*t
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liltaireissocute · 3 months ago
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[PERC'ILDAN]
I united with my husband an we came here to hurt everyone. This is an art for his very angsty but beautiful fic. Basically it's Percy's death but make it Perc'ildan for it to hurt even MORE. Also Cassandra is there. Read it, don't be scared of cyrillic.
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kanis-things · 3 months ago
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i'm going to become as unbearable towards solas as the game will allow with lady rook 🤭
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myszalowska · 4 months ago
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This frame be like:
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aroacenezhaanddainsleif · 2 years ago
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again, aroace and not much of a shipper so my opinion is biased, but seeing people do polls and stuff of like "what's the best LMK ship" always seems so har-
it's Free Noodles. the answer is Free Noodles.
look, Shadowpeach is great, but those bitches are way too goddamn emo for this, and all Traffic Light Trio ships are just chaos incarnate.
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look at Pigsy and Tang. look at the old gay guys. they're so dumb. they've been together 20 years. i love them.
(and also Sandy rocks.)
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svtskneecaps · 1 year ago
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lukewarm take of the evening: y'all care too much about being ""outdated"". fellas this smp moves inhumanly fast. it is ok to CHILL holy shit CHILL. y'all are like "(posts BANGER ART) super late guys sorry" friend i am hitting you with a blanket i am snapping you with my metaphorical towel WHAT DO YOU MEAN SORRY. "(posts BANGER FIC) rip this is outdated now" WHO CARES???? I LOVE YOU, OK. ohhhh woe is us as the fandom at large for having MORE HAPPY PILLS ARC CONTENT oh no how outdated!! how could you be writing speculative fiction about how forever felt during happy pills :( slash SARCASM!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN!!!! THERE ARE SO MANY BANGER ARCS, WHAT, YOU THINK WE'RE COMPLAINING????? FOR GETTING MORE OF THE CONTENT WE LOVED????? oh no we're past the period where everyone thought green gay ninjas were like Dead Dead, my work is now outdated and noncanon :( WDYM. GIMME. A BANGER IS A BANGER IDC IF IT TAKES THREE MONTHS. you think rome was built in a day?? fuck you, baltimore, GIMME. my ass has been cooking a goddamn backflipo family fic since july when it was ALREADY outdated do you think i fear god??? "oh no, you're making an edit of slime's (attempted) egg murdering spree?? how could you, that was months ago it's irrelevant" SAID NO ONE EVER.
save your wrists kidlings ok carpal tunnel is no joke. CHILL!!!!! CHILL!!!!!!!! TAKE YOUR TIME SHEEEEEESH OK LOVE YOU <3
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garbashedump · 11 months ago
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oops my hand slipped
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GUYS TAKE THIS AND RUN THEY GOT THE KISS YES
oc's belong to chaosaliien! you see, i did a power move, so that they are credited, but aren't tagged
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... what if i.. didn't add the hashtag either? well, kinda.... HAHAHA
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biitchcakes · 1 month ago
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JESSICA DREW PINTEREST OUTFITS .
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a small inspo collection from my Jess Fashion pinterest board .
( personals DNI . )
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woodlandrealm · 8 months ago
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you're all mistaken, can't you see? i was not taken, i chose to leave 'cause i danced with his shadows and he danced with mine and the blood on our hands made our love so divine
@angbangweek
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lalalaugenbrot · 25 days ago
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Attempt at a Comprehensive List of
Alexander von Humboldtʼs Potential Boyfriends
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When if not now that Alex came 2nd in the @napoleonic-sexyman-tournament (what a time to be alive) would be the perfect time to finally thoroughly pick his private life apart. Strangely it has always been a mystery even to me (and of course overall it will remain a mystery until the end of times), but I still thought it was about time to at least get some order in the few things that we do know – mainly for myself but also, I dare say, for the public. You (the public!) will find a short text for every friend under the cut ↓.
disclaimers:
a) I tried to pick the most appropriate picture of everyone but please imagine especially the first ones a lot younger than they are in the pictures
b) it’s a potential boyfriends list, meaning: I’m not saying Alex definitely had romantic and/or sexual relationships with any let alone all of these men, it’s just a list of men where it seems at least possible; but ultimately, of course, we do not know and will never know
c) Alex lived for almost 90 years, and even though his textual remains can seem infinite, there is a lot we don’t know about him, especially his private life, not least because he habitually destroyed almost all of his private letters (which is also why for all of his correspondences we only know the letters he wrote but almost never the ones he received) − so I don’t think there’s any way this list is exhaustive (let me know if you think anyone is missing?)
d) Bonpland is not in this because Alex went out of his way to specifically state that his relationship with Bonpland was purely scientific
e) the point of this post isn’t to determine his sexuality, but since it has already come up, just a couple of words on him being on the asexual spectrum: that is perfectly possible and maybe not even unlikely, he said things about himself that could be interpreted as such (not wanting to marry, not having sensual needs); but I think it’s good to keep two things in mind about that: 1. not wanting to get married was a big thing in 1800, something you had to explain yourself for and not wanting to get married as a man also obviously meant not wanting a wife, it was by no means a question on whether or not wanting a significant other and/or sex; 2. the narrative of his sex-less life at least partly derives from the (mainly 19th/20th century) wish for him not to have been (actively) homosexual
f) I hate to be that person, but it has to be said: language and culture back then were much more emotional and expressive than we are used to today, so not everything that sounds super intimate or even romantic to us (language-wise) has to actually have been meant that way; of course this doesn’t rule out anything either but it’s a thing to keep in mind
g) if anyone is interested in sources or further reading on anything particular, do not hesitate to hit me up! But i’m not adding any of that to this post because 1. it’s already 2 km long and 2. this is tumblr dot com
Wilhelm Gabriel Wegener (1767-1837)
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18-year-old Alex met Wilhelm in 1787 during the one semester he studied at the University of Frankfurt (Oder). Wilhelm was a (protestant) theology student and on 13 February 1788 they made a “holy” oath to “eternal brotherly love”. They wrote each other very cheesy letters, very much in the Empfindsamkeit fashion of the time, proclaiming their eternal and ever-growing love for each other. There was no one on earth, Alex wrote to him once (and in Italian no less), whom he loved as ardently as him (“Non vi è uomo sopra la terra ch'io amì così ardammente che lei…”). He also told him that, ever since he had met him, it seemed to him that God had created people only in pairs, because no one else could ever compare to what he meant to him. In his letters Alex also repeatedly refers to the many hours spent together (“chatting”) in a certain armchair in Frankfurt and proclaims that he has never been happier than in that very chair.
They kept contact for a couple of years after their time in Frankfurt, but at some point their friendship faded out.
Carl Ludwig Willdenow (1765-1812)
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Willdenow (a published botanist) and Alex met in 1788 in Berlin, when Alex had one day decided to just call at his house to ask him to teach him botany. Willdenow agreed and they became friends quickly, spent a lot of time together, and when Alex wandered through Berlin on his own to collect plants, he would afterwards bring them to Willdenow who would then identify them for him.
We do not know a lot about their friendship during that time (and maybe I only included him in this because I needed 9 tiles) but at least one phrase in Alex’s autobiography fragment calls our attention, not least because it’s highlighted by what I like to call a Streisand strike-through: “I became enthusiastically fond of him” or “I grew to love him enthusiastically” (“Ich gewann ihn enthusiatisch lieb”, written in 1801 and crossed out roughly 50 years later).
They stayed in contact even after Alex had left Berlin a couple of months later: in 1795 Alex became godfather of Willdenow’s son and in 1810 he convinced him to come to Paris to work on his botanical collections from the South America trip. Sadly, Willdenow fell ill in 1811 and died in 1812 in Berlin.
Karl Freiesleben (1774-1846)
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Alex met Karl in 1791 in Freiberg, where both studied geology and mining at the renowned Bergakademie. Karl was the son of a local mining family and Alex learnt a lot from him about his new profession. They both were nerdy about stones and minerals in ways you couldn’t even begin to imagine. They gifted each other minerals, went down into the mines together, and in August 1791 they made a 200 km long geological expedition through the mountains of Bohemia on foot. But aside from pages-long enthusiastic rants about geology, Alex’s letters to Karl are also full of sentimental love declarations. He called him Herzens-Freisesleben, Herzens-Karl or Herzensjunge (roughly “my heart’s Freiesleben/Karl/boy”) and once finished a letter with: “going to bed now and I’ll be happy when I dream of you” — a passage Karl thoroughly struck through later, probably so no one else could read it, but someone deciphered almost all the struck through passages anyway (not all heroes wear capes!).
Karl and Alex stayed (sporadic and long-distance) friends for the rest of Karl’s life.
Reinhard von Haeften (1772-1803)
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The above picture shows a snippet from one of Alex’s travel journals where he noted Reinhard’s birthday (“14 Mai R.”) because sadly we don’t have a picture of Reinhard. But let’s hear how Alex described him:
“This Reinhard v. Haeften has been my only and hourly company for a year now. I live with him, he visits me in the mountains. [...] I have already ridden 8 miles [60 km] just to see him for a couple of hours. He is very tall, taller than most men and he’s only 22 years old but looks more mature than me [at 25]. He has a very remarkable face and everyone finds him to be one of the most beautiful men, and I too think he’s beautiful, but most importantly I have never seen purity of the soul, kindness and courtesy being reflected in anyone’s features as much as in his.”
Alex and Reinhard met in 1793 in Bayreuth (where Alex now worked as a mining official) and they quickly moved in together. However, shortly before meeting Alex, Reinhard had also managed to make a baby with a married woman 4 years older than him. Alex was friendly with Christiane, the child’s mother and helped to keep the birth a secret. The boy (named Friedrich Gustav Alexander, Alex’s godson and surely named after him) had to spend the first years away from his parents. In the meantime, Reinhard continued to live with Alex, accompanied him on business trips and mineralogical expeditions and in 1795 they went on a two-month trip through Northern Italy and Switzerland. It was only with and through him, Alex wrote to Reinhard once, that he could live, only close to him that he could be fully happy.
Later, after Reinhard and Christiane had finally gotten married (and reunited with their son), Alex wrote him a very long letter, proposing for the three of them to (continue to?) live together with Reinhard as head of the family and to settle for quiet life in Switzerland, Italy, or some small town in the west of Germany. That plan never worked out, but “Rein” (as Alex called him), Christiane, their by now two children and Alex lived and travelled together for another two years while Alex was already preparing for his big journey.
After he had sailed for the Americas in 1799, he tried his best to stay in contact with them. In his letters, he called them his “Herzensmenschen” (again, roughly: “his heart’s humans”), wrote them that he was dreaming about them day and night and how much he wished that his – their – Rein could be with him to see all the marvels, too. But cross-atlantic communication was bad during that time and in both directions most letters never arrived.
Sadly, Reinhard unexpectedly died in 1803 while Alex was still in America, meaning they never got to meet again. Alex stayed in contact with Christiane and the children − the only survivors of the shipwreck, as he put it − and wrote Christiane how he still remembered their time together, along with all the hopes and dreams that they had had and that despite the “all-robbing fate”, there was something unalterable in the depth of their love, that could only die with them. When Christiane remarried and had another son in 1806, she named him Gustave Louis Reinhard Alexandre. Alex continued to financially support Christiane and the children and in 1813, Reinhard’s son Fritz (Alex’s godson) visited Alex in Paris for three months.
Carlos Montúfar (1780-1816)
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Alex met Carlos in 1802 in Quito and despite him having no scientific qualifications whatsoever, Alex chose Carlos to accompany him on his further journey. This decision offended botanist, geographer and astronomer Francisco José de Caldas (who himself had hoped to join the expedition) so much that he, in a letter to botanist José Celestino Mutis, famously called Carlos “[señor Barón de Humboldt’s] Adonis”, probably insinuating that Alex had picked Carlos purely for his looks, or even more.
Together with the rest of the party, Alex and his supposed “Adonis” travelled what today is Ecuador (where they climbed the Chimborazo), Peru, Mexico, Cuba and the USA. At least once during that journey (but perhaps regularly?) they shared a bed (as in some kind of temporary/mobile  accomodation) which we know because Alex explicitly says so in his travel journal when he describes a night in which Carlos had very bad stomach cramps which Alex tried to ease by heating handkerchiefs over the fire for him in the middle of the night.
Carlos accompanied Alex back to Europe in 1804 and stayed with him in Paris for a couple of months (where they most likely both attended Napoleon’s coronation) until he ultimately left to go to Madrid. But since Carlos had trouble getting money from South America, he still had to rely on Alex’s support. However, over time his contact to Alex seems to have broken off, because in a letter from 1806, Carlos complained about Alex not answering him anymore (“¡Qué largo silencio!”) and then told him, quite dramatically, that he was running out of money, and that he, Alex, was his only friend, his only hope, and the only person he knew in Europe who could tell him what to do. Whether all of Alex’s letters had gotten lost in the mail and whether Alex ended up helping him out or not, I think we don’t know. (But knowing him as I do and since he after all kept that letter, I’m sure that he did.)
Later, Carlos went back to South America, where he (alongside Símon Bolívar) fought to liberate the continent from the Spanish Crown − a fight he unfortunately didn’t survive: he was captured and executed by the Spanish in 1816.
Joseph Louis Gay-Lussac (1778-1850)
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Alex and Gay (that’s what Alex called him, no pun intended) first met in 1804 in Paris, just after Alex’s return from America. Before, Gay had done two things: 1. contributed to a harsh critique on one of Alex’s papers, 2. ascended 7016 m in a hot-air balloon to investigate the air up there − a world record at the time and more than 1000 m higher than Alex had been on the Chimborazo, which had then also been a world record (in recorded European history).
Evidently, these were the best conditions for them to totally hit it off: they almost immediately started to work on the evaluation of Gay’s balloon ascent and often spent entire days working together in Gay’s room, from 9 am until after midnight. In a letter to his father, Gay wrote that Alex was the man with the best heart he had ever known, that their tastes and sentiments were absolutely the same − and that their hearts felt a great need to see each other very often.
After the publication of their paper (in which they, without fully realising it, also first identified the chemical composition of water: H2O), they (and another friend) went on a six-month field trip through Switzerland and Italy − where they were lucky enough to witness both an earthquake and a resulting Vesuvius eruption. They ended their journey in Berlin where Gay stayed at Alex’s for a couple of months and even started to learn German until he unexpectedly had to leave for Paris. His absence, Alex wrote after Gay had left, pained him a lot.
When Alex finally returned to Paris as well, they shared a single room at the École Polytechnique and even after Gay became a father in 1808 and married in 1809, Alex continued to (at least occasionaly) live with his family for many years. Gay’s first son (born in 1810) was named Jules Alexandre and while I have no proof that he was named after Alex, I think it’s safe to assume. Alex seems to have also been very intimately integrated into the family life, because he once wrote to Willdenow (with a humorous undertone of course): “We are always pregnant and just had a girl again. Right now we’re not feeling anything though.” Alex was also there to help when an explosion in a laboratory accident injured Gay’s eyes so badly that Alex and another friend had to take him home in a blindfold.
No letters between the two have survived (that we know of), but we do know that in the years after they first met, Alex considered Gay his best friend and “one of the kindest beings in the world”, that he named an American plant genus after him (Gaylussacia), and that they used “tu” with each other (which was very uncommon in France at the time except for childhood friends and family). They stayed friends for the rest of their lives and formed a kind of trio with Arago (see below).
Karl von Steuben (1788-1856)
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We don’t know when exactly they first met but according to Alex they started to see each other daily in 1812 at the studio of painter François Gérard, where Alex had then started to take drawing lessons. Steuben, a young aspiring artist, lived and worked at Gérard’s studio. According to Alex, they “drew and painted” together “daily” for at least one or two years. Withdrawn from all other society, he wrote, this was now his “only joy” (interestingly almost the exact same wording he had used to describe his relationship with Reinhard 20 years earlier). However, it had perhaps been one of Alex’s exaggerations because he at least seems to have attended the famous salons Gérard held at his studio, where all the cool Paris people came to hang out. Alex reportedly talked incessantly, stayed late into the night (the main thing usually didn’t get going until midnight) and was found there again, freshly dressed and shaved, already at 7 in the morning.
In the meantime, Alex had started to torment basically everyone around him to commission Steuben to paint them, their sons, daughters, fiancés etc. to help Steuben support his poor mother in St. Petersburg. In 1814, even Alex’s brother noted that Alex had suddenly become strangely interested in art. In the same year, Alex became godfather to Steuben’s newborn son Alexander.
However, the biggest commission Alex got Steuben was a life-sized full-body painting of himself, which he intended to gift to his sister-in-law. It took 7 years to finish and in the end Alex’s brother had to pay for transport and framing because Alex had run out of money. Neither his brother nor his sister-in-law were overly enthusiastic about the likeness of the painting or Steuben’s talent in general but they still put it up in their home because after all, as his brother put it, they loved Alex and always liked a picture of him around.
Alex and Steuben stayed in at least loose contact for many years and Alex occasionally even still tried to get him commissions. Steuben’s painting of Alex hung in the Humboldt residence in Tegel for over a century before it was ultimately destroyed in WWII. Apparently though, another Alex portrait by Steuben from 1815 still exists in a private collection somewhere.
François Arago (1786-1853)
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Arago, a young astronomer, was on a scientific expedition through Spain when he got entangled in the Peninsular War: mistaken for a French spy, he got arrested and incarcerated, managed to flee, was captured again, transferred, released, drifted off at sea to Algeria, all the while managing to hold on to his most valuable possession: his scientific records, which he kept hidden under his shirt at all times. When Alex heard about this (the two had never met before), he was so impressed by his courage and determination that he sent a letter to congratulate him — and to offer him his friendship. And in fact, one of the first things Arago did when he finally returned to Paris in 1809 was to go and meet Alex. It was the beginning of a 44-year-long friendship. They saw each other almost daily, worked together at the observatory, planned an expedition to Tibet (which never happened), and actually travelled at least to London in 1817 to visit Alex’s brother, who commented to his wife: “Alexander has arrived yesterday. But he isn't staying with me, even though his room had already been prepared. You know his passion to always be with one person who is his favourite at that time. Now he has the astronomer Arago who he doesn't want to part with (...) So they're staying at a nearby inn.” Just as with Gay, Alex and Arago used “tu” with each other and after Arago had gotten married in 1811, Alex was close with his wife and children as well as with his siblings, nieces and nephews — in some letters he even considered himself part of the Arago family.
When Alex was forced to move back to Berlin in 1827 to work for the king, he wrote Arago desperate letters on how much their separation pained him, how much he missed him every hour of every day. In the following 26 years, Alex’s letters to him were full of yearning pleas for just a couple of lines of his hand, which, as he wrote, always made his heart flutter. However, Arago often didn’t respond for months, but when he did, he at least knew to reassure Alex, writing things like: “Outside my family, you are, without any comparison, the person I love most tenderly in this world.” Alex kept a portrait and a large Arago bust in his study in Berlin, and until his late seventies, he travelled to Paris regularly (that is, every few years), first and foremost to see Arago. (Actual quote from 78-year-old Alex in a letter to his niece: “Every morning at half past eight without interruption, I’ve been at Arago’s in the observatory, today for the 62nd time.”) According to Arago, he and Alex have only been angry with each other one single time in all those decades and even that went over in an instant.
They saw each other for the last time in January 1848, on the last night of Alex’s last stay in Paris. When Arago fell ill five years later, his family informed Alex of his worsening condition — but Alex couldn’t travel to Paris to see him one last time. Even over a year after Arago’s death, Alex wrote that the memory of those last moments in January 1848 vividly came back to him during the night at least once a week. He outlived his friend by 6 years.
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lilacthebooklover · 1 year ago
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@charismabee and i have a sacred rule around shipping. it is simple, undeniable, unbreakable. it is that "rivals" is nothing more than secret code for "lovers". this has infected so many of my fandoms, turned everything on its head. my brain is infested with crackships that somehow make sense. it's reached a point where i can no longer read the word "rival" without viewing it under this lens. ah, yes, the rivals from my favourite book as a kid? they're GAY. the childhood best friend lawyers who became rivals out of circumstance? they're GAY. the cringefail anime fan and the jock he's declared his greatest rival? they're GAY. the embodiment of truth and purity and the evil, deceit-centred parallel to his soul? they're GAY. the list goes on.
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badsalmonella · 7 months ago
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*Pointing* it's sooo fucking over for me bro
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perrybearwaks · 3 months ago
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aaAAAAAAA
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queenofbaws · 4 months ago
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Hi Queenie! I hope you’re having a lovely day 😁 I was wondering if you would ever consider writing another story like The Almost(s) 🥺 within the Until Dawn universe something which deals with character studies, darker and angstier themes either before Hannah & Beth died or after the events if everyone survived, because I loved the scenes you wrote when the characters were in college, and I think you’d be great at writing scenes set in high school🥺
I was also wondering if you would ever consider writing another character study fic for the counsellors in The Quarry, such as what they get up to while they are counselling before the events take place (similar to your prequel for Until Dawn - The Almosts) 🥺
And one final question, hahahaha, I love your writing so much and your The Almosts series is the best fanfiction I have ever read. I also think it’s one of my favourite books ever! I love your writing, and I think you’re such a good writer, and I know a lot of people agree with me on that :)) I just wanted to ask you, I know that so many writers are hard on themselves and I was just wondering do you feel proud of your The Almosts series too and the rest of your writing :)) I hope you do, because your writing is amazing ❤️❤️
🥹
oh my gosh, well i'm having a lovely day now, thank you very much! hehehe ;P
as of right now, i can't say that i have any plans for a big, heavy, character study fic taking place for either of those - that doesn't mean i'm saying i'll never do it, of course, but for the time being, i'm sorry to say that the answer to your first two questions is probably not 😔
ALAS, i am...so very old, and once the first week of october comes around i'll be even older than that, so while i very, very much appreciate your faith in me, i'm afraid any high school stuff i'd write would come across as unbeLIEVABLY out of touch slkjflksdj and while i love the hacketteers so, so much, i don't know that i have any solid ideas to really delve into surrounding their story at the moment.
that being said, i do have a fic underway that - to me!!! in MY heart!!! - is very much the spiritual successor to the (almost)s, and that's like wringing blood from a stone. it's set in the quarry, and covers the events before, during (and maybe even after ;)c ) the game itself, but it's focused on the hacketts, and not the hacketteers. i consider it the spiritual successor to t(a) because t(a) was a big, involved story about changing friendships and grieving and mourning those changes - stuff i was dealing with pretty heavily at the time of writing it - and like wringing blood is about family and generational cycles and the struggle of always being seen as someone's child despite being a full-grown adult; also...things...i am dealing with pretty heavily at the time of writing, hahaha! but it's obviously very different than t(a), it's an entirely different universe, so i FULLY understand it might not have the same appeal!
and oh my gosh, you absolutely put the biggest, sappiest smile on my face with your kind words, thank you so, so much!!! ...but i have to be honest here - i AM very proud of the (almost)s, it's unquestionably the project that i sort of judge all my other writing against, and while i strive to be proud of everything i write...i am very hard on myself! i do get down about my writing fairly often, and let me tell you, that self-doubt? it comes creeping in more often that i'd like to admit. BUT!!! personally, i think that's an important, if unpleasant, part of being a creator: the day we stop questioning ourselves is the day we stop trying to improve! so i always try not to let it get me too down, and i keep chugging along, but i'd be a liar if i said i'm always happy with my work.
so it makes my heart grow at LEAST three grinchy sizes when someone like YOU waves from readerland and says something i put out there resounded with them 🥹 hehehe truly, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so, so much for reading, and for making me smile 💖
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voidtoufu · 1 year ago
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heeeeey!
this emotionally reaped arpart psychopathic marshmellow is new to tumblr and struggling
how do things work here?
do I get to bitch and moan about how I ain't got any skills I want cus we've been too busy keeping ourselves outside of a psychward or is it just about being gay and liking bugs
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remyfire · 1 year ago
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Breaking my silence: I love him
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lesbiansforboromir · 1 year ago
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oh OH hO spicey ohhh having a spicey little tantrum about the boromir tag don't listen to me at all do NOT listen I mean it I mean it this is so petty
#text post#Gonna go ffffucking crazy- people have to bend so far over backwards to make Boromir bad that they just full out ignore his entire characte#and bend even further over backwards to make the elves all better than him too like jesus christ#oh is it BOROMIR who would be bitter about dying in the defense of Rohan??? whose despair is just so self serving and requires legolas to#slap him out of it yes uhuh that seems reasonable seems like BOROMIR would just hate the idea of dying for allies he so clearly loved#when in the full actual canonical scene of his death he dies for two random guys he met five months ago and all he has to say about it is#he failed he is sorry he has paid#BOROMIR definitely doesn't deal well with his own looming death and would definitely snap at other people about it ignoring all the decades#he has been under the looming shadow of death and has been known as not-grim and loved by many and has done his duty almost like#that is literally all his life has been up until this point#and of course of course it's ARAGORN who he's supposed to be fighting for because he's SOO impactful on Boromir's psyche he meant so much t#him apparently ggrsfsfgrrffffggfrgr#everyone wants to hit boromir oh yeah he's so annoying his hopelessness is such a burden and everyone else has to deal with him#if ANY of you go looking for what I'm talking about and do anything about it I'll slaughter you myself these are such inside thoughts the#comic is good#I shouldn't even be angry it's the natural conclusion from a story that tells you Boromir is bad but does not spell out that it's because h#isn't 'faithful' to god#they just tell you he is 'too despairing' and he 'desires power' and he 'doesn't have hope' (hope being a proxy for faith and Boromir not#believing in Aragorn means he doesn't believe in Eru's chosen leaders and his 'grand plan')#despair being a sin because it means you are selfishly giving into your own desires for a good life for you and the people you love#rather than accepting that all is God's plan and this life is only meaningful if you are defending Eru's right to the throne of the world#But that isn't spelled out so for despair to be treated as evil in the story people apply a secular understanding of 'bad despair'#already a TERRIBLE idea btw genuinely awful to percieve hopelessness as a personal moral failing#I suppose thats it actually the major reason it gets to me cus hopelessness and despair is a base aspect of my existence like#I am in despair pretty much constantly and I know a lot of other disabled people with similar sentiments#and the urging from people to 'have hope' is at this point sickening and infuriating and maddening to me it is disconnected from my reality#WHICH is demonstrably why I care about Boromir and Denethor so much no one meets them where they are no one sits in their reality with them#they are deeply relatable in their dealing with dispair namely; they just live and accomplish and strive along with their sarcasm and#black humour through their dark grueling lives and do what duty demands and try to hold onto their crumbling family relationships#and then they each have uniquely cathartic ends to those lives
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