#i'm sorry i'm trying

[nyx-knacks-writes]

Why Beth Crowley's "I Didn't Ask For This" is Very Fitting for Robby Keene

I heard this song again recently, and given my present obsession with Mr. Keene, well... Yeah, it fits. Anyway. On with the show!

Strike first

Make it hurt

When everyone assumes the worst

I never have to say I'm sorry

Okay, so "Strike first." That's our clue that this is specifically for S4 Robby. He's joined up with Cobra Kai. Strike first, strike hard, no mercy. Then we have "Make it hurt." In S4, Robby was absolutely trying to make people hurt. Think of the prom, just off the top of my head. The whole reason he encouraged Tory to go to it was to "crash You-Know-Who's big night." He wanted to get back at Sam. Same goes with teaching Miyagi-Do to the Cobras. It was about winning the tournament, sure, but he also *knew* that it would hurt Daniel. Then there was the mohawk. Need I say more? Finally, those last two lines. This is probably the time in his life when Robby is feeling the most abandoned, at least by every trustworthy adult in his life. He's committed a horrible crime and ended up in juvie for it. No one listened to his side of the story, all of his old friends think he kicked Miguel over the balcony on purpose (that's what I imagine he'd believe, at least, though we can't see into anyone's head), his girlfriend's gone and gotten with another guy in his absence, even though they never officially broke up, and he's been left to sleep on a hard dojo floor by every adult that claimed to care about him. No one stepped up and said "you're not staying at Cobra Kai and I will drag you out kicking and screaming if I have to." He can't trust Kreese, he probably can't fully trust most of the other students in the dojo, and he sure as hell can't trust Kreese or Silver, when he comes into the picture. Robby is all alone.

Spiteful

Ruinous

I'm all things you feared I was

Another villain in your story

This would be him speaking to Daniel. Now that Daniel's betrayed him by turning him in to the authorities at the first available opportunity, Robby wants nothing to do with him. I would say he's probably still hardcore wrestling with the consequences of the school fight, even after juvie, and he likely feels guilty on at least some subconscious level for disappointing his mentor. He's probably feeling like he brings ruin everywhere he goes, which ties in with that view that Daniel had of him A) when Robby was revealed to be Johnny's son and B) when Robby brought Sam to Johnny's apartment when she was drunk after the party. If he can't be on the good side, he'll make a hell of a riot on the bad. Another villian in the story because he's too damaged to be good. The poison runs in his blood and he can't be purified.

You think that I'm a spitfire?

You should

Afraid you're on my bad side?

That's good

If I wanted to end you

I could

I could

This is the image Robby wants to present to the world. He's dangerous, he's badass, he can *mess you up*. He's a menace to society—or at least to the karate world. He's gone to the dark side.

I'm sinking down

If you only knew how hard it is

For me to climb out

I'm kicking and screaming

But no one can hear me

So what happens now?

The shadows are creeping in

I didn't ask for

I didn't ask for this

And this is how he's feeling on the inside. He's sinking deeper and deeper into the Cobra Kai fold, into that ruthless, merciless mindset. Deep down, he knows it's not good for him, not good for anyone. I truly believe that on some level, he got that. Even if he pushed that thought down, I believe that he had to have known in his heart of hearts that joining up with Cobra Kai was only making things worse. He may have said that he knew what he was doing and acted all tough about it, but at the end of the day, he was still a scared, inexperienced kid who was just trying to find somewhere to belong. And of course, y'know, he didn't ask for this. He didn't ask to be Johnny Lawrence's son. He didn't ask to have a deadbeat alcoholic dad and an addict mom. He didn't ask for the school fight to start or ask for Miguel to go over the balcony and wind up as injured as he did. Robby didn't ask for any of it.

Cold rage

Hides the shame

Of images I can't escape

Scars that live under the surface

Once again, school fight. That 'cold rage' would be referring both to the end of the fight as well as the anger at Daniel for turning him in. The shame is that he actually did let the rage take control and cause what it did. Images he can't escape? Think about the flashbacks in S5 during the fight with Miguel. Think about every time the show has ever flashed back to Tory's scream as Miguel went over. Think about Robby running up and staring over the balcony, of Sam screaming to ask what he'd done. You think any of those images are going away for Robby? Not a chance. He's stuck with those for life. And do you think he got any therapy in juvie for the trauma that that fight would have left behind? I'd say chances are nil. Robby's scars run deep. And that includes those from before the events of the show, too, because you just know this poor boy had a shit childhood.

It's strange

What I became

When part of me was ripped away

And replaced with something worthless

Okay, this makes me think of the moment in the AVT when Robby locked eyes with Kenny just before he could score the point on Hawk. Like he said at the end of the episode to Johnny, it was like looking in a mirror. He saw himself in what he'd helped to mold Kenny into, and he didn't like what he saw. All the peace and goodness of Miyagi-Do had been temporarily removed and replaced with the sharp spikiness of the Cobra Kai mentality that would ultimately only make things worse.

You think that I'm a spitfire?

You should

Afraid you're on my bad side?

That's good

If I wanted to end you

I could

I could

Okay, I don't think I mentioned it earlier, but I like the uncertainty of the repeated "I could." It feels, in this context, like Robby reassuring himself. He's in Cobra Kai now. He's strong. He's powerful. No one can hurt him anymore because he'll hurt them first to keep them away.

I'm sinking down

If you only knew how hard it is

For me to climb out

I'm kicking and screaming

But no one can hear me

So what happens now?

The shadows are creeping in

I didn't ask for

I didn't ask for this

This is the chorus again, and I don't have anything extra to say right now, though I may update it later. Thanks for reading this far! Onward!

Take what's left

Of my fractured heart

Bloodstained 'cause

The pieces are so sharp

Take what's left

Of my fractured heart

Bloodstained 'cause

The pieces are so sharp

And this is the conversation with Johnny in S4E10. This is Robby finally realizing and admitting to himself that what he's been doing is wrong. He's offering his dad one more shot at doing right by him, giving up all of the anger. His heart's been broken and bloodied so many times, and he's offering the pieces to Johnny in hopes of finally feeling better and getting his life back on track.

I'm sinking down

If you only knew how hard it is

For me to climb out

I'm kicking and screaming

But no one can hear me

So what happens now?

The shadows are creeping in

I didn't ask for

I didn't ask for this

Again, nothing much to say. Woo final chorus!

Never forget

I didn't ask for this

Then we have this final little addition. A final plea for mercy in returning to the light. He didn't ask for any of it to happen. He was just trying to take care of himself and protect himself from more pain.

Wow, if you're still here, thank you so much for reading this long-ass post. It's been rolling around in my head for a while now, and I just had to get it out of my brain. I'll probably come back and edit it later for clarity and conciseness, but for now, it's coming at you raw. Have a cookie for making it to the end, and have a wonderful day/night/whatever! 🍪🍪

[rioblitzle]

working retail

[kitschky]

and maybe we're doomed but oh my love which one of us is orpheus?

congrats to severance for becoming my second fav anticapitalist-media-referencing-greek-tragedies

[captainjonnitkessler]

Sometimes I wish we would start calling out the performative radicalism on this site for the poser bullshit it is. "Remember, it's always morally correct to kill a cop!" "Don't forget to firebomb your local government office!" "Wow, it sure would be a shame if these instructions on how to make a molotov cocktail got spread around!"

Okay. But you're not killing cops or firebombing government offices. You are posting on a dying microblogging website to a carefully-curated echo chamber that has radicalized itself into thinking that taking the absolute most extreme position on any subject is praxis but that anyone discussing the most practical way to effect actual change is your sworn enemy. You do not have the street cred OR the activist cred to be talking about killing cops, babe.

[herbarimoon]

The brightness of the Sun will give me just enough

To bury my love in the Moondust

[pangur-and-grim]

it's hard when you're forced into a situation with an autistic stranger (like, say, waiting for an elevator) where you're both trying to run the "how can I be a chameleon" scam on each other, and both short circuiting. it's like when ai images cannibalize themselves and start distorting into nonsense

[egophiliac]

once again, don't think I'm not still obsessing over 7-12

(eventually I will get back to being less scribbly, whoops)

[canisalbus]

Today's tumblr experience.

[chalkrub]

smorkin

[cabinette]

fun times at the theme park!

[cirrus-grey]

[hiwelcometothemonstersancturary]

you know that one time-traveling episode where we had a young ford cameo? okay, so-

[reunitedinterlude]

dnp tours + motifs

[captainjonnitkessler]

You know I used to think "tumblr's absolute refusal to actually engage with the Trolley Problem in favor of insisting that there must be a third, morally pure option that doesn't require them to make a hard decision and anyone who asks them to make a binary choice is just a short-sighted idiot is really fucking annoying, but I guess it's not actually doing any harm".

Anyway that was before we asked tumblr at large to decide between "guy aiding a genocide but making progress elsewhere" and "guy who would actively and enthusiastically participate in a genocide and would also make everything else much, much worse for everyone elsewhere" and the response was that there must be a third, morally pure option that doesn't require them to make a hard decision and that anyone who asks them to make a binary choice is a short-sighted idiot.

[mumblers-lobby]

💍❤️‍🔥✨ hair-over-flames in love!

thanks to @thatskindarough for the idea ily buddy<3

[worst-egirl]

hypothesis: vampires are magically vulnerable to light originating from the sun

observation: moonlight has no effect on vampires, despite being a reflection of the sun

conclusion: this aversion is not a result of light or its origin, but some property of sunlight only present in direct contact

hypothesis: vampires are extremely sensitive to uv radiation