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#i'm so sick and tired trying to change your mind
lilacgaby · 2 days
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title: el malo
pairing: prisoner!toji x ex!reader
summary: "pero sigo siendo el malo que no dejas de querer." toji won't change, you know it. but you can't get him out of your head.
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toji got caught, you'd warned him over and over to stop hanging around those people, cried for him to listen to you before this happened.
you were witness as he was slammed into a car, handcuffed and bound as you tried to run to him, held back by the officers and the patrols now trying to follow the rest of the group who'd ditched him the second they could.
he was locked in a cell, annoyed as he examined the living conditions he'd face for an unset amount of time.
he should've listened to you.
after months of visiting, paying for calls and sending him money, you grew sick and tired.
everytime you came to visit him he wore a smirk, his hand against the glass as he talked as if everything was fine, as if this was normal in any regard.
it exhausted you to no avail.
finally, you made up your mind. looking into his sharpened green eyes through the bullet proof glass, the guards surveillance something you'd never gotten used to. you sighed, looking down at your anxious hands. "i'm not coming to see you anymore."
the only real emotion you'd seen from him in months popped out, despair, anxiousness, and anger in his gaze.
"you're fucking lying." he muttered, slamming his hand against the glass. did it crack a little? "look at me, look at me and say you don't love me."
"you don't love me! you never did, because if you did you would've taken me seriously!" you yelled, ignoring the looks of the others beside you.
his face scrunched up in annoyance. "i made mistakes. we all do! we've went through hell but i've never stopped loving you."
"no, no stop it." you crossed your arms now, watching as he kept his arm hung up on the glass, the phone in his other hand.
"say you don't love me."
"this-- this isn't love! this is a fucking mess toji."
"say it, because this has nothing to do with love and you know it!"
a moment of silence passed over you two, your time was now running low as he stared at your eyes, now turning glassy. your hands shakily started moving, playing with your fingers.
finally, with tears in your eyes, your promised ring now in your the palm of your hand, you say it, "i- i don't love you."
you discarded the phone on the table, green eyes following you as you left your ring right next to it. you scurried out, leaving a distant minded toji sat in the chair, the phone still in hand.
his days locked up were now spent reminiscing of the times you'd spent together, the years you'd lost on him. the tears you'd spent warning him.
your hands tied around his waist as he rode you around the city on his motorcycle, his laughs as you held him impossibly tighter.
the dates you'd go on, expensive but oh so worth it to see you dressed up just for him.
he slammed the bars of his cage as he thought about how you must be doing that with someone new now. his face against the iron, a glint in his eye, a hurtful one.
his fists were now bruised and his face bloodied, thought not with his own blood, as he fought in the courtyard again. he was letting his frustrations out on the other prisoners, who now seemed like saints compared to him, because he'd picked up your phone.
toji finally sucked up his pride and chose to call just for that loser to pick up? he was filled with rage instantly, cursing the man out and sending him threats before slamming the phone on the receiver.
you acted like you didn't know who toji was, shrugging your shoulders and pretending like it was a scam call, but disappointed you weren't there to pick it up. you missed him more than you cared to admit.
toji knew you were moving on, he was told about how your new boyfriend bought you an apartment together. how he'd post about your dates and month anniversaries all day long,
funny how you didn't speak of him as much.
funny how your boyfriend seemed to look like an extremely downgraded version of him.
funny how you'd look at your new boyfriend, and try to find the features that reminded you of him.
it wasn't his fault really, you needed a rebound and he was just so desperate for you, kneeling at your every move. treating you so sweetly, and yet..
you knew you didn't love him at all. he was just a placeholder. you thought you did for a brief moment, but you just liked the way he made you feel.
did you feel bad playing with his heart for four years? not really, but the fear of commitment lie went out the door the second he found out about toji, connecting the dots.
you left him with nothing more than a wave, packing your things and leaving the house keys on the marble that he'd chose for you. driving away to somewhere mindless.
that was a lie though. as you pulled over to the side of the road, parking by a sign warning of towing, toji peeked into the window, a smirk overcoming his scarred lips.
his biceps bulged through his compression shirt, the years of training in prison evident in his muscle definition. the orange prison slacks he wore, evidence of his recent departure, were baggy and hung over his shoes. his hair was long and unkempt, it looked like he cut it himself.
he leaned over, slinging a hand into the car window.
"is this seat taken?"
"for you?
...
never."
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syrenki · 4 months
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dollypopup · 6 months
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y'all can all cancel me (again) for this, but if there's even a SHRED of 'who should I pick?' from Penelope in season 3, I am tuning out SO fast because like. . .sorry not sorry, there IS no choice. Debling is some crusty OC suitor she barely even knows and Colin is a man who she has been so supposedly in love with to the point where she'd ruin her entire family's reputation to have a potential love story with him. Penelope and Colin have background, years of knowing each other, intimacy that few people in the Ton can boast of having (letters, conversations about purpose, fights and arguments and makeups) and her and Debling have. . .a dance or two at a ball because he's a rebound for Penelope's broken heart. he means nothing. he has no nuance, he has no weight to the story, he is such an afterthought to me. either I wanna see Penelope going 'you know what? I don't even LIKE this dude. he's. . .fine, but I don't care about him even a shred as much as I care about Colin' or the INSTANT Colin's like 'you know what? we should get married' if it's not an immediate 'say less, you're already my husband, try returning me without the receipt, Debling whomst?' then I don't want it!
like. . .it's just so frustrating to see all the 'I hope Debling sweeps her off her feet and she rejects Colin's proposal and she makes him work for it and and and-' nonsense from the fandom and it's always tagged and no matter how many times I block it, it just keeps popping up. I go into the Polin tag for POLIN. I don't give a SHIT about a male love interest other than Colin. Not one. Not a shred. Not an iota.
and also. . .Debling has the 'benefit' of not having depth, or character traits, or HISTORY, so peeps can project onto him however they want, but I'm calling it now, there is NOTHING he could do or be that would make me like him more than Colin. Colin will always hit different, and I will always love him more. and if Pen's not on that same page? lol bye
you want me to believe Penelope and Colin are soulmates and it's romance for her to hem and haw about how difficult a decision it is for her to marry a stranger who knows barely anything about her. . .
when Marina was out here dropping banger lines like 'You were the only man with which I could see myself being happy' and 'I do not care about any of these men, where is Colin?'? like hello??? and she wasn't even fully in love with him!!!! but we'll demonize her until the cows come home in our fandom and make her the villain in Polin's love story for DARING to get in between Polin, yet Debling, a white man, is a darling dear perfect prince for getting in between Polin? existing in our fandom solely so Penelope can be like 'lol, Colin ain't shit, let me entertain any and everyone else'?
if that's the direction it goes then, ten toes down and on my mama, she doesn't deserve Colin and she can move because I'm on my way to court him my damn self
and that's that on that
#you know what? lol it's been a bit since i've posted a controversial opinion#tagging it#polin#sorry not sorry i ship polin. . .so i wanna see. . .polin. . .and i'm getting damn sick and tired#of all the bullshit pen/oc pen/other dude theories and stories in the polin tag#and i don't want polin to lose screentime over a frankly bleh male oc#you can't change my mind#if i don't see at least marina's 'you've seen him with the little bridgertons!' level of squee and 'i only want to talk to colin'#levels of devotion then i don't fucking WANT IT!!!!!#yeah definitely try out the marriage market#realize that NO ONE has a good time on the marriage market#try to get over him w/ whomstever#but then be like 'i don't even LIKE this dude where's colin i miss him' about it!!!!!#because otherwise i am not here#i am asleep#and i am courting colin in your place pen#i'm coming for your man#anti debling#if debling has 100 haters i am one of them if he has 10 haters i'm one of them if he has 1 hater i am the hater if he has 0 haters i'm dead#it's incredibly obvious that 'pebling' is half rooted in a revenge storyline fueled by anger at Colin and his complexity#and half a projection of wanting Penelope to have 'choices' because she is a representation and manifestation of the fans themselves#and so people think an OC that can be 'perfect' for them- whoops I mean Pen (because he doesn't have any real depth or interest)#he's a cardboard cutout we can throw whatever you want onto#so we can make him 'perfect' instead of the much more meaningful storyline of pen and colin both being messy and loving each other more#and part of it is bitterness over Polin not being insta-love#which. . .if it was i wouldn't like them as much as i do#anyways y'all ain't slick#and it's fucking WEIRD to be in a fandom that's like 'i ship this couple but i hope she gets with ANYONE else'#maybe you. . .don't ship the couple??#like. . .to the point of wanting her necklace to be from debling. . .and her wearing it everywhere??? WHAT??
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fxllfaiiry · 1 year
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❥ It's so sweet, knowing that you love me
★ pairing: miguel o'hara x fem!reader
★ summary: miguel knows you're pregnant, the only problem is he doesn't know how to to tell you. ─ or the time miguel found out before you.
★ warnings: fluff!! usage of many pet names, angst if you squint, miguel being a simp for his wife, pregnancy stuff, swearing, some shitty humor.
★ notes: there aren't enough dad and husband miguel fics out there so i had to write this!! icon credits: @/natashowlet
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Miguel knew something was off, he’s known for days.
You’ve recently been throwing up, having odd cravings and random mood swings. At first, he thought you might be sick, you thought the same thing but now he knows it's not that. You were definitely pregnant. Everything adds up, and all of it made sense, then again he could be totally wrong. 
He made up his mind to try and talk to you once you returned home, he would surprise you with a romantic dinner and bring up the subject. He had about an hour to prepare everything. 
Well, that's what he thought, the second he got up to start preparing, you waltzed in through the door. 
“Mi Amor, I’m home.” Why are you home this early? He wanted to surprise you. 
“Mami, why are you home so early?” He says pulling you into a bear hug, usually, he would squish you completely but right now he wasn't sure that’d be the best idea. 
“What, aren't you happy to see me?” You chuckle. 
“No, no I'm really happy, I was just gonna cook you a surprise dinner that's all,”  he replies bashfully
“Aw, that's so sweet.” You threw your arms around him, placing kisses wherever you could reach. “I have the best husband ever.” 
“And I have the most amazing wife, now come on let’s go make something to eat.” He scoops you up in his arms and carries you bridal style towards the kitchen. He desperately wants to bring up the topic of you possibly being pregnant but now was not the best time, he didn't want to ruin the moment. 
This conversation could wait till tomorrow, right now he just wanted to enjoy some time with his wife.  
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
“Good night, Miggy.” His head was buried into your neck, his arms were secured somewhat tightly around your belly, and your smaller hands were coving his bigger ones. 
He thought about bringing up the topic right now but quickly scratched off that idea.
He was so tired from the day's activities, he could fall asleep instantly.
He could hear you slowly drifting off, your breathing calming him down and lulling him into slumber... well almost. 
Just as he was on the verge of falling asleep he heard something ─ or rather someone. 
He could hear another heartbeat. Coming right from you. He thought he was going crazy at first, but the closer he listened, the clearer it got. He was right, you were pregnant.
Holy shit. You were pregnant. He was going to be a dad. 
In all this, it occurs to him that you didn't even know yet, he would have to tell you tomorrow no matter what.
He’s so happy. He finally has another chance, he won't mess up this time. He would do anything to protect you both.
But what if you didn't want kids just yet? The topic of kids has come up before and you both want them, but what if you changed your mind? There were so many things that could go wrong but Miguel tried to push all the negative thoughts away and focused on falling asleep. 
He slept like a baby that night. 
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── 
“So, honey, I was hoping to talk to you about something.” He avoided having the conversation all morning, now he needed to tell you. 
“What is it, Miggy?” You sit down looking at him expectantly. You could see that he was nervous, it was obvious by the way he was acting. “Is everything okay?” 
“Yes, everything is fine, mi corazón, don't worry.” How should he start? Should he just jump straight into it or start off slow? He should have thought about this before, well no time to do that now. 
He took a deep breath and it all came rushing out “I think, actually no, I know that you’re pregnant.”  
Silence. You were too stunned to speak. 
“Excuse me?” There was pure shock written all over your face, he would’ve laughed if the situation was different. 
“I heard 2 heartbeats last night, one was yours and the other one was -”
“Are you sure? I mean are you 100% sure? Maybe you heard something else?” You didn't want to get your hopes up just yet, you always wanted a baby with Miguel but if this turned out to be a false alarm you would be a little crushed. 
“I’m 9.99% sure. Bebé, if you want we can get a pregnancy test done?”
“Yeah okay, let’s do it.” 
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
An hour later both of you stood in the bathroom. Three minutes felt like hours right now. 
You might be pregnant. This isn't some crazy dream.
“Bebé, if you don’t want to keep the baby I absolutely respect tha-” He’s still not sure if you’re happy with this or not. He was worried he messed up in some way. 
“No, I want to keep the baby but I just don't want to get my hopes up just yet. I definitely want to have a baby with you.” You wrap your arms around him, his scent calmed you down. You were going to be okay. 
“I want to have a baby with you too,” he whispers. 
You lean up to give him a kiss, your hands gently coming up to stoke his cheeks. Miguel pulled back and mutters, “I love you.”  
“Love you too.” A moment later you both heard the timer going off. This was it. 
You slowly step forward picking up the stick and turning it around. 
Positive. You were pregnant. 
“Well, what does it say?” This whole thing is making him feel so anxious. 
“We’re having a baby.” His wife is carrying his baby, this is real, he isn't dreaming. 
“I knew it! I was right.” He pulls you off the ground and into a hug, placing kisses all over your face while muttering small “thank you’s” and “I love you’s” 
“I can't believe we’re gonna have a mini O’Hara running around soon,” you giggle kissing his jawline. 
“She’s going to be just like her mother. ” Knowing a mix of you and him was going to be here soon made him feel content. 
“How do you know they're gonna be a girl, hm?” 
“Just… a small feeling.” His small feeling would be proven right 9 months later.
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shadowcitrine · 3 months
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If you do That Again--
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DarlyxReader 912 words
Warnings: Some language.
Timeline: Not important, season 1-ish
Summary: Daryl is tired of listening to you blowing hair out of your face.
Darly stopped dead in his tracks, his jaw tightening as he glared over his shoulder. “Do tha’ one more time…” His tone is low and threatening, clearly irritated, but there wasn't a reason for it. 
Passing on his left you asked, “What crawled up your ass and died, Dixon?” 
Daryl chewed on the words brewing behind his teeth and marched forward. Why he was pissed off this time was a mystery. Up until now every single one of his demands to be out here with him had been followed to the letter. You'd kept quiet, stayed right on his heels and avoided every single stick you two had come across for at least the last half mile, which for you was a considerable win.
If you'd known he was going to be such an ass you wouldn't have asked to come. With the way he's been acting all day it would have been better to be bored sitting back at camp than deal with the king of grumpy walking buddies. What was worse is his foul mood was starting to rub off on you. Blowing a puff of air upwards you followed the lock of hair flying out of your field of view.
Daryl stopped again this time spinning on his heel. Eyes hard and narrowed, jaw jutting forward he seemed to be sizing you up. The last thing you wanted on this hell hike was to argue but you could see it brewing, unsaid words threatening to burst forward.
“What now?!” You snapped. Quick soured jerks of his head made you feel uneasy, doubly so when his hand went to rest on his knife hilt. The group had warned you about his temper but you'd overlooked that because he was kind of cute when he frowned. 
“All damn day!” He sneered. When you furled your eyebrows in confusion he puffed out his cheeks puffing little breaths between pursed lips. “Fuckin’ sick a’ it!”
“Oh! I'm sorry that the apocalypse didn't come with a thirty pack of elastic hair ties! I can't help the fact that I need to see!”
Daryl shook his head again, fist clenching around the hilt of the blade as he began pulling it out. “Come ‘ere.” He was going to butcher your hair, hack it off just because he was having a shitty day!
“No!” taking a step back away from him you gaped. “I'm gonna let you cut off all my hair!” 
“Ain't cuttin’ your damn hair! Come ‘ere!” he hooked a finger at you. “Gonna stop this shit ‘fore you drive me outta my damn mind.” Daryl is many things but a liar isn't one of then. Taking a cautious step forward ge tucked the blade between his teeth and pulled some string from his pocket. “Tur’ roun’.” 
A tiny gasp left your lips a smile tugging at the corners. “Are you going to do my hair?”
He took the blade from his lips, not an ounce of joy to be read. “Turn ‘round ‘fore I change my mind and saw it off your thick head.” He shoved the string at you. “Hold tha’.” When you didn't move right away he tucked the blade back between his teeth and grabbed your shoulder to spin you around.
He was actually going to do this. No longer facing him you didn't try to tamp down the nerves making goose flesh spreading down your arms. Expecting rough movements for a quick ponytail you were confused when he started sectioning your hair gently freeing tangles from it as he went. 
“Ow!” a sharp pinch at your scalp made you wince.
“Sto’.” The fat syllable sounded wrong in his mouth but you obeyed. He was deft but through fingertips massaging away the sharp pulls of tangles. You hair pulled tight at the back of your head, his actions pulling it backwards causing a strain to keep it upright for a moment. He reached over your shoulder, fingers snapping when you didn't hand him the red piece of dyed twine right away.
Handing it to him you asked, “What did you do to it? Can I see?”
He reached around and used two fingers to guide your face forward again. “Gonna fuck it up if you keep movin’.” Knuckles brushed your upper back, accidental but welcomed and you closed your eyes pretending not to hear the sound of something small snapping. “There! No more listenin’ to you huffin’ and puffin’ all damn day.” He moved away.
“How does it look?” you reached behind touching it, feeling your way down. He'd braided it. There was no stopping the grin that broke out as you pulled the tail over your shoulder to inspect his work. He'd tied off the end tightly finishing the red string with a tiny little bow. “Daryl!” 
“Ain't perfect but it'll hold. Keep it outta your-”
“It's so cute!” Suddenly seeing your inspection wasn't as important as the trees around him. You stepped around him bending to try and catch his eyes. “You even did a bow!” you held the end out for him to see.
“Stop!” the tops of cheeks were pink and while you could pretend it was from the heat you knew that wasn't it.
He started marching away and you ran ahead to try to make him look. “You made it all girly!” you teased. His cheeks were getting redder by the second.
“Stop!”
“Daryl Dixon braided my hair!” you sang out.
“Shut up woman!”
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awearywritersworld · 1 year
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"took you long enough"
gojo satoru x reader summary: when you ask your best friend to meet the guy you've been seeing, things don't go quite as planned. w/c: 3.2k tags/warnings: angst to smut with a fluffy ending. 18+. friends to lovers. jealous gojo. curse words. drinking. gojo shoves ur love interest. he's just kind of an ass to him in general. fem!reader. no use of y/n. a/n: i don't often write smut, but i kinda got carried away.. carpe diem, i say masterlist
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gojo is tired of hearing you ramble on about the new guy you've been seeing. he barely even glances at your phone screen when you try to show him a picture you took together.
"you're way out of his league," he states dryly.
"hardly," you scoff. "men don't exactly line up for me like women do for you."
it'd be a lie to claim you didn't have a thing for gojo at one point, but you learned a long time ago that he isn't interested in you that way. it wasn't hard to tell, given his parade of hookups and the occasional two week relationship. you've gotten over it though... for the most part, anyway.
he rolls his eyes. "i assure you that's only because you're shy, princess."
"okay, so you should be rejoicing that your best friend finally landed herself a boyfriend—"
"boyfriend?"
"well.. it's not official yet, but i think he's going to ask me soon!"
your apparent enthusiasm at the prospect leaves a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. of course, it's only because he wants the best for you and this guy certainly isn't it. "you've gone on like two dates."
"'toru, i've been seeing him for almost a month!" when he doesn't respond, you continue speaking. "so... that's why i was sort of hoping you'd come out with us tonight."
he looks at you increduously, "i am not third wheeling."
"you won't be!" you assure. "shoko and kento said they'd come. i just want you to meet him because you're really important to me and i actually think this could go somewhere—"
"alright, alright," he acquiesces, albeit begrudgingly. he's never been able to say no to you.
you squeal with excitement, throwing your arms around his neck in a brief hug. "i can't wait! we're all meeting at seven, i'll text you the address."
after a quick kiss to his cheek, you gather your things, all but running out the door. you weren't going to give him a chance to change his mind.
he stares after you wordlessly, running a hand through his hair while an unfamiliar tightness overcomes his chest.
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when gojo enters the bar, he spots you right away despite the sizable crowd. as he makes his way toward your group, he can't help but notice how pretty you look in your little dress. in fact, you'd look absolutely perfect if it weren't for the fact you have another man's arm around your waist.
wait, what?
your laugh rings out across the room and judging by the smirk on shoko's face, he can tell she's said something you find unreasonably funny. once you spot him, your face lights up and you pull away from your almost boyfriend to give gojo a hug, something that brings him a sense of satisfaction.
"hey, sweetheart," he greets loud enough that the other man can hear. "who's this?"
"satoru, this is shinya!" you're beaming at him expectantly, so gojo has no choice but to extend his hand.
"hey, man." shinya shakes it firmly. "it's great to meet you. my girl's told me a lot about you."
gojo's eye twitches and he decides almost immediately that he finds shinya utterly insufferable. his voice is grating and he's too short and didn't you say you prefer guys with lighter hair—
"nice to meet you, too," gojo responds cooly. "i'm always happy to meet one of her friends."
nanami and shoko share a knowing look, more than prepared to break out their hypothetical popcorn. and boy, is this as good an occasion as any.
the strongest sorcerer isn't one to indulge in liquor, but how can he refrain when he has to be in the same room as shinya? each time he touches you, looks in your direction, calls you some sickening pet name— whenever he breathes in your general vicinity, really— gojo brings his drink up to his lips.
everyone else seems to be getting along, but unfortunately, he grows increasingly snarky with each glass he empties.
shinya asks what you'd like when he goes up for another round and it's 'oh, you don't know her favorite drink? well, i guess you're not as close as we are.'
shinya pulls your chair out for you and it's 'wow, you really got yourself a gentleman, princess.'
shinya mentions that he's fairly well versed in martial arts and it's 'really? maybe we should go out back and spar. i think it'd be fun.'
nanami steps in then, not entirely convinced gojo would hesitate before laying him out. "you can put the measuring tape away, idiot."
shinya is being an impressively good sport, but your anxiety has you emptying glasses in a hasty manner, too. you have no idea what's going on with gojo. you understand that he can be abrasive at times and that communication definitely isn't his strong suit, but his behavior is just absurd. you force an awkward laugh at nanami's comment.
"not that i'm not having, um, a great time and all!" you hiccup before continuing. "but i'd really like to dance. c'mon shinya!"
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nanami and shoko wind up joining you both, which comes as a surprise. neither of them are exactly the partying type (not that you are either), but you're happy to see them having fun. honestly, you can't remember the last time either of them let loose.
you wonder if they also just wanted to escape gojo's snide remarks. now that they aren't ringing in your ear every other minute, your nerves have certainly calmed down a bit. well, until—
"so you do know that he's totally in love with you, right?"
"who?" you question, looking around as if it'd be obvious.
and it is, just not to you.
shinya chuckles. "gojo."
"what?" you bellow, completely dumfounded. "no way! i mean he's not— and i'm not— we're just friends."
"yeah?" he still sounds amused, nodding in gojo's direction. "is that why he looks like that?"
turning toward your table, even you have to admit he looks completely miserable. unbeknownst to you, he's spent the last half hour sending away every woman that approaches him asking to dance. he just isn't in the mood right now. at least, that's what he tells himself.
"er.. he just doesn't get out that much," you try your best to brush it off.
"whatever you say, baby."
you're relieved he doesn't seem terribly bothered by the idea, even if you find it completely implausible. it's true you spend a lot of time together and that you know one another like the back of your hands, but you'd given up any hope of it being more than friendship a long time ago. you'd moved on.
but if that's the case, why did shinya calling you baby suddenly feel so wrong? you convince yourself it must just be the alcohol.
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when the four of you finally stumble back to the table, you realize you've missed last call. though it's probably for the best, as the five of you are certainly in for a nasty hangover the following morning.
it's near closing time, but the crowd has hardly thinned out and the music is still beating loudly in your ears. you're going back to jujutsu tech with your friends rather than home with shinya, so you loudly exchange goodbyes over the music as he gets ready to leave.
"i had a really great time tonight," he tells you. "maybe we could go for dinner tomorrow? there's something i've been wanting to ask you."
"okay!" you agree eagerly, eyes shining. "i'll call you in the morning."
gojo feels his stomach drop, his jaw clenching bitterly. he tries to tell himself to relax because this is what you want, but he just can't seem to get his thoughts straight.
shinya leans down, his lips meeting yours sweetly, and it causes white hot anger to flood gojo's body. it all happens so fast, shinya's ripped away from you with astounding force and he staggers backward. you've been struggling to hear over the noise all night, though you make out each word that follows with striking clarity.
"get the fuck away from her!"
gojo stalks off before anyone has time to process what just happened. he's already half way across the room when you come to your senses.
"'toru!" you call out, taking a step in his direction when he doesn't respond. "satoru!"
you take another step but you're stopped when something pulls you back. you look down to find shinya's hand wrapped around your wrist before your gaze turns up to meet his eye. "look, i really like you, but if you go after him, don't bother calling tomorrow."
the ultimatum is simple, but so is your decision. "i'm sorry."
you run off before he can say anything else, shoving your way through the bar patrons, and follow gojo out the door into the cold air of night.
"satoru!" you shout once more, thankful that his pace is slow enough for you to catch up. he turns to face you when you tug on his sleeve.
you nearly shy away from him, his expression something fierce, but the liquor in your system gives you courage. "what the hell was that? you embarrassed me—"
"i don't fucking care," he spits.
he's never taken such a tone with you, so you throw your hands in the air and exhale impatiently. "what do you mean? you should care! you're my friend, aren't you?"
"that's exactly what i mean. you're supposed to be mine," he growls.
you're not sure how it happens, but the next thing you know, his lips are crashing into yours, your teeth knocking together with the force. his hands paw at your hips, pulling your body against his greedily.
"i can't believe," he mumbles against your lips, "you wasted your time," his hands find your hair, tugging your head back and revealing your neck, "with that fucking loser."
once he's finished speaking, his lips trail across your jaw, landing just below your ear. your eyes flutter open and you're suddenly very aware that you're standing in the middle of a public sidewalk.
"'toru," your voice is breathy, even though you're trying desperately to keep it together. "there are people—"
he pulls away heatedly, his eyes narrowed. "you didn't care when he kissed you in front of everyone."
"yeah, but that was just a peck," you reason, though if he keeps this up, you're worried you might lose your resolve.
"tch, i guess you're right." the familiar sensation of warping through space and time sweeps through your body for a few seconds before your feet meet solid ground again. you don't need to look around to know you're in his bedroom. "we're going to do a lot more than that tonight."
your stomach flips at his words, heat rushing to your core. his lips find your neck once more, leaving sloppy kisses along your skin. "that's what you want right? for me to show you who you belong to?"
you nod weakly, feeling as if you're in a daze.
"ah, ah. use your words, sweetheart."
"yes— ah—" he sucks on the spot just above your collarbone before nipping the delicate skin there. "yes, 'toru."
"then get on the bed," he orders lowly.
and who are you to disobey? you can't honestly say you haven't been dreaming of this for years. his blanket feels cool to the touch, making you realize suddenly how much your skin is already burning with desire.
he kneels beside the bed, wasting no time before pushing up your dress and pulling your legs apart. you see his shoulders fall as he exhales harshly at the sight. his eyes flutter shut when he presses a kiss to your core over the tiny cotton panties you decided to wear.
he's rudely reminded of the possibility that you may have put them on with another man in mind.
"did you let him fuck you?" he interrogates. his eyes don't leave yours as he begins placing open mouthed kisses on the inside of your thigh.
"n-no!" it's almost embarrassing how vehemently you deny it, but the man between your legs takes great pleasure in your response.
"mm, knew you were a good girl."
he hooks a finger beneath your panties, pulling them down excruciatingly slow. you buck your hips up once he throws them off to the side.
"feeling eager, princess?" he taunts, his breath fanning across your center.
you nod, your legs shaking with anticipation, before remembering what he said about using your words. "please, 'toru. need you so bad."
he can't possibly deny you, not when you beg for him so sweetly. he presses a soft kiss to your swollen bud before flattening his tongue against it, drawing circles there. he groans when your slickness coat his chin.
you whine when his eyes shift up to meet yours and push yourself against him even further. he chuckles against your skin, but truth be told, he's just as eager as you are. he slips one long finger inside of you, relishing in how easily you take it.
"oh—" you cry out as he adds another finger, his tongue pressing against you just a little harder.
his other hand is gripping your thigh roughly, the flesh spilling between his fingers. one of your arms is supporting your weight, but the other reaches out, your fingers threading through his hair.
you're panting now, tugging on his white locks in pleasure. he moans in response and the way your walls are clenching around him lets him know you're close. "c'mon baby, cum for me."
that's all it takes for you to unravel, his name falling from your lips over and over. he doesn't stop until he's sure you've come down from your high.
"you tasted so perfect," he tells you, unbuckling his pants in a hurry and shoving them down his legs.
his shirt and boxers follow quickly thereafter, so you pull your dress over your head. you can't tear your eyes away from his cock, it's long and thick and pretty.
he pushes you back against the bed and crawls on top of you, but then he just stares down at your face. just as you begin to wonder if something is wrong—
"you're so fucking beautiful. have i ever told you that?"
your mind reels for an answer, but you don't have to worry about it for long, as his lips capture yours. you can taste yourself on his tongue
"tell me what you want," he murmurs against your lips as he moves his cock along your slit, coating himself in your wetness.
"need you, 'toru. p-please, i need you to fuck me."
he smiles against your lips as he lines himself up with your entrance, pushing inside slowly. he leans back to find that your eyes are screwed shut and your lips are parted in bliss. he's determine to seer the image into his mind forever.
splitting you open is absolute ecstasy, the noises he's making are proof enough of that. "fuck, princess. fuck."
he nearly whimpers when he bottoms out. "god, you feel so perfect. i could stay in this pussy forever."
your legs wrap around his waist once he begins to pump in and out. "never felt so full, 'toru. it feels s'good."
he shudders at your words and laces his fingers with yours, sweat beading on his forehead as he picks up his pace. his head dips down, his teeth nipping the skin of your neck aggressively.
"p-people are gonna see—"
"i want them to," he rumbles. "want everyone to know how good i made this tight little pussy feel."
you can't argue with him, not when this is the best anyone's ever made you feel. his head shifts even lower, his tongue moving along your nipples in a way that has your back arching off the bed.
he uses the opportunity to snake an arm beneath your lower back, holding your body against himself firmly. the new angle has you mewling his name in the most sinful way.
"you're takin' me so well. like you were made for this cock."
your head's lolling to the side as you fall to pieces beneath him and he can feel himself getting close. "look at me when i fuck you, baby."
you do as he asks, his hips stuttering when he sees the tears of pleasure swimming in your eyes. "you're mine, aren't you? tell me you're mine."
your pussy clenches around his cock so tight it's almost painful. "i'm yours, 'toru. all yours."
"fuck, that's my good girl. gonna cum for me again, hm?"
you nod up at him meekly, too far gone for words, but he doesn't seem to mind this time.
"'i'm close too, sweetheart." his fingers reach down to rub circles on your clit, eliciting a throaty moan from you.
you feel your stomach tighten and you're nearly there, but you don't go over the edge until he begs, "can i fill you up? want to so bad."
you can't find the strength to respond, so you hope the way you tighten your legs around his waist and claw at his back is answer enough.
your head rolls to the side once more, your vision going fuzzy around the edges. he grips your chin between his thumb and forefinger, turning you to face him. "please, baby. wanna see you when i cum—"
he hums your name through a choked moan, his thrusts becoming sloppy as he reaches his own high. he collapses on top of you, laying there for a moment before pulling out and rolling onto his back beside you.
no words are shared, both of you trying to catch your breath and slow your heart rate. the silence gives your mind a chance to wander, which is never a good thing.
you consider the fact that gojo's never kept a girl around for more than a week or two— that this probably meant way more to you than it did to him. you sit up feeling stupid and wrap your arms around your chest.
you look around the room in search of your panties, his cum running down your thighs when you stand up to grab them. it's not until you pull them up your legs that he opens his eyes. he props himself up on his elbow, furrowing his eyebrows when you pick up your dress.
"what are you doing?" he asks curiously.
"well, i figured i should go back to my room—"
"what, are you crazy?" he gawks at you. "get your ass back in this bed."
you approach him shyly, your apprehension clear to him. "i mean, you can if you want, but why would you go back to your room?"
"i just didn't know if you... you know.."
"no, i don't know." if you knew him any less, you might think he was intent on torturing you, but it's clear to you that he's genuinely confused.
you sigh. "i just didn't know what this meant for us."
"baby, i didn't think i could make it any more clear." he sits up to grab you by the wrist, tugging you onto his lap and wrapping his arms around your waist. "i'm all yours, so you're stuck with me." he tries to mask the nervousness in his voice when he asks, "is that okay with you?"
you nod, hiding your face in his neck. "took you long enough."
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zayneslady · 8 months
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hey!! loved that angst fic you wrote xx can i request the boys reaction to when the reader/mc and them are in an argument, and they accidentally said something extremely hurtful and it made reader cry. make the boys regret it so much pls hehe😼 thank you 💗
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warnings: angst, open ending again hehe and again, reader is not MC
characters: Zayn, Xavier, Rafayel x reader (separately)
a/n: my first request *-* thank you so much! This exact trope is one of my favorites. I hope you enjoy it! Get your tissues ready! Also thank you to everyone's support in my first post! I'm so happy! ❤️
Classification: scenarios
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ZAYNE ❄️
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You didn't want to admit it, but you were sick. During the day you felt a little sore in your throat and your nose was stuffy. Arriving at Zayne's house after work, it was more than obvious that you had a fever. Your face was red and the chills running through your body made you shiver. 
There was nothing else to do, you would miss work tomorrow to fully recover. Furthermore, with the care of your loving doctor, you knew you'd be fine in no time. So you quickly took a shower and after drying your hair, you grabbed a blanket and curled up on the couch with a cold patch on your forehead, waiting for Zayne patiently. 
To your surprise, he arrived at a normal time and your heart vibrated with joy when you saw him enter. He had his head low as he stepped out of his shoes and closed the door behind him. 
"Zayne! Welcome back! How was your day?” You greeted him as he shrugged his coat off. “Guess what," you said, giggling softly because it was quite obvious by your funny voice that you were sick. "I got a little sick after yesterday's ra- 
You jumped a little when Zayne suddenly groaned, whipping his head up to look at you. “Oh my Lord,” he said, annoyed. “Can't you see I'm fucking tired? You do not know when you shut your damned mouth? I can't stand you! Why are you so clingy?” 
Your eyes widened and your face turned bright red. Your mind went blank and you didn't notice the tears streaming down your face until Zayne's face changed from complete anger to guilt. He looked at you from the door as if he didn't know what had happened just now. He didn't recognize himself. How did he dare to talk to you like that when you-
He gasped softly, “you're sick.”
You tried to clean your tears with your hands as you got up from the couch. Zayne made an attempt to come close to you, but you quickly ran to the bedroom only to come back after a couple of minutes with your shoes and coat on. 
“Excuse me,” you said, as you approached the door. 
“What? Where are you going like this? You need to rest.”
You nodded, trying to keep some distance from him. “I know. I'll rest back home. So please move.”
“Stay here. I'll take care of you,” he grabbed your hand and more tears fell down. How could he talk so sweetly right now after what he said. 
You shook your head, pulling your hand away and pushing him aside so you could open the door. “I don't need you, Zayne. Not when you can't stand me.”
“I was wrong, please.”
“I was wrong too. Goodbye, Zayne.”
XAVIER ⭐
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“My poor Xavier,” you mumbled, gently cleaning a wound in Xavier's side. You winced when he did and your heart broke. You knew perfectly well that this could happen because of his line of work, but you felt terrible every time he came home hurt. “Oh, Xav, is it too painful?” You asked as you started to bandage him. 
He shook his head, breathing heavily and resting his head against the pillow on his bed. “It could be worse. Thank you for helping out.” 
“No need to thank me,” you said, smiling at him as you placed a tender and loving hand over his now bandaged wound. “I wish you didn't have to do this. It's so dangerous.” 
Your words had no poison. You clearly didn't want Xavier to suffer in any way. Why couldn't he have a regular, safe job? Maybe he's just strong because he has to protect everyone. You said those words from the bottom of your warm heart, so you were more than surprised to hear Xavier's response:
“What? Are you saying I'm weak?” He spat and you blinked. 
“N-No! I'm just saying that I wish you had another job because- 
“Is that so? So you rather have a bunch of wanderers attacking innocent people? Just because you don't want me to get hurt?” 
“It's- It's not like that! I never said that. I just get worried sick for you and-
“Maybe I should really stop, huh? Just turn a blind eye to everything that's happening like egoist people like you di.”
He just kept vomiting out words, one harsher than the last. Every time you tried to speak and fix this misunderstanding, his irrational words drowned out your voice and it made something heavy and nauseating settle in your stomach. This was not going to end well in any way. 
“Xavier, my love, please listen to me. I do not- 
“Maybe one day a wanderer will actually kill you. And believe me, I won't even bat an eye at you,” he said, crossing his arms and turning his head away from you. 
Your eyes had never filled with tears as quickly as that moment. Your body began to shake with suppressed sobs as you felt heat and disappointment throughout your body. Did Xavier just... wish for your death? And in the hands of a creature as horrible as a wanderer? 
“Oh no,” he suddenly said and you flinched when you felt his touch against your cheek. “I am so, so sorry.” You cried a little harder before getting up from his bed. “W-Wait, my star. Please, I'm sorry.”
No words came out. You simply grabbed your bag and left the room.
He called your name and then groaned in pain as he tried to move. “Pl-please, come back! Where-
You couldn't hear more of his words as you closed the door of his apartment. Did this mean the end? You truly thought so. 
Rafayel 🐠
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"Ah, welcome back, Rafayel!" The amount of excitement that rushed through your body whenever your eyes landed on him was almost overwhelming. It wasn't that you hadn't seen him in a long time, but a second without him felt like a century. 
His eyes, usually warm and sparkling, looked cold and even angry at seeing you in his house. "Hello," he said dryly as he closed the door behind him. You frowned slightly. "What are you doing here?" 
"Hmm, nothing much. I just wanted to visit you. Is that alright?" 
He sighed, placing a paper bag on the table. "Yeah, sure. I gave you a key after all."
You cleared your throat, nodding awkwardly. "Did... you have a good day?" 
He sighed again and shook his head as he stepped out of his shoes. "I didn't. It was terrible for the very first moment I opened my eyes. You see," he started and you nodded, listening carefully. "I overslept so I lost precious time for my painting. Then I didn't have time to eat so I didn't eat anything but a piece of bread."
You immediately got up to make dinner for him, maybe after eating he'd feel better? 
"And the worst thing was," he said, collapsing onto his couch. "I couldn't find my emerald green paint so I had to go all the way to the art store and get a new one! Ugh!" 
You blinked, frowning a little. "Your emerald green?" 
"That's what I said."
"Hmm, I'm very sure I put it in all of your greens?" You left the ingredients aside as you walked to the paints. "Here it is." 
He got up and looked at you with an astonished expression. Confusion quickly turned into anger and he was yelling at you in a second. "Why didn't you tell me?!"
"You saw me last night!" You explained, carefully leaving the paint back in place. "You said you wanted your paints to be more organized and I asked you if I could help you out! You even told me you liked how I organized it by colors!" 
Rafayel let out a frustrated sigh as a hand carded through his hair. "I can't believe I just lost all of that precious time because of your stupid mistake!"
"Excuse me?"
"Every time you try to help, you just mess things up! Can't you keep your little hands to yourself for once? I was just stupid for letting you help me out! You are way too much, I can't stand you sometimes.”
You were stunned. He had never said anything like that about you, you couldn't even remember other times when you wanted to help him and you ruined it. Besides, it wasn't your fault. The green paint was there all along and he just hadn't taken the time to look for it properly.
You knew it wasn't your fault, but his harsh words and the anger and hatred in his eyes were too much. Tears quickly filled your eyes and began to fall down your reddened cheeks. 
Rafayel realized his mistake a bit too late. Letting out a gasp as he watched the first tear fall, he hurriedly approached you, but you backed away, putting space between the two of you. He couldn't say anything, too surprised by his own words.
What was just a moment seemed like minutes, endless hours with deafening silence. Only your sobs echoed around the entire house, until your voice, small and trembling, made him jump. 
“I won't touch your stuff again, Rafayel,” you said softly, avoiding his eyes. 
“N-No, I didn't mean-
You nod, “if you don't mind, I'll sleep in your guest room. Goodnight, Rafayel.”
Deep inside you so desperately wanted him to stop you, but he watched you disappear into the hall and never called you back.
You knew it was going to be a very cold night.
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bumblequinn · 11 months
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hi @sourpatchsquids! thank you for your question.
as an artist with ADHD, i know this struggle very well. unfortunately offering advice on this kind of thing can be tricky, because what works for me may not work for you (and vice versa!). nonetheless, i can try; take whatever works for you, forget the rest, or reshape any part of it as you see fit. :)
but before i offer any actual tools, i have one caveat. i want you to take a moment to reflect and consider if you should be:
changing expectations
the timing of this question seems fated, because just the other day i had a therapy session wherein i expressed my grief and frustration over struggling to work lately due to my seasonal depression. it's not fair that i'm struggling just because it got a little darker outside! i just want the spark i had in the summer! i was so much more consistent!
my therapist's response: nothing about human beings is consistent. we get sick, we get tired, we get hungry and thirsty (and thirsty) and sad and lonely and restless and stressed and overwhelmed. this all gets amplified for folks who are atypical in some way or another.
when my therapist compared our seasonal cycles to those of plants and other animals, who wilt and slow down and hibernate, i protested aloud that i wanted to be a perennial instead. at this she said: even perennials change with the seasons. rose bushes have to be pruned, sometimes down to half their height! it was a dose of perspective i didn't particularly want, but really needed.
so when you're struggling to work through executive dysfunction, burnout, or brain fog, it can help to first check in with yourself about a few things. what do you have the capacity for right now? do you need any accommodation? and if so, what changes you might make to accommodate yourself?
with practice and self reflection, i've learned a handful of specific routines that help me when i'm struggling with creative work, which i'll detail next. note that while your question is specifically about music and i am specifically a musician, i believe that all of these suggestions can apply to most any form of digital creative work.
with that in mind:
#1: work slower
when i'm at the top of my game, i can get a LOT done in a day. but when i'm depressed, fatigued, or distracted, i just can't go full steam. sometimes i'll try to convince myself that i can if i just push harder, but what actually ends up happening is that i'm just fiddling with settings and going in circles rather than moving forward.
instead of that, when i want to work a lot but can't, i try to work slow. how slow? however slow i need to. take four hours to figure out the melody for a single verse. take all day to figure out that drum groove. yeah, i take a lot of breaks in between. who says i have to be my Absolute Most Productive Every Day Or Else? that's the puritan work ethic talking. kill it. be kind to yourself.
i'm reminded of advice i once read about some super successful and prolific author (gaiman? king? pratchett?) who said they wrote only four hundred words every weekday. that's already less than the word count of this post, and i'm only—[travels into the future to check my final word count]... 22.8% of the way through writing it!
now, i don't think i could function that way, because ADHD means some days i'm hyperfocused like crazy, and other days i just have no steam at all (more on that in #4-6). but it seems to me that if even someone highly respected in their profession can achieve what they have with only a little bit of work on a regular basis, maybe i don't have to punish myself for not pumping out a finished work every single week.
doing less work per day means you're much less likely to burn out, which does a lot for working more consistently. if that consistency still doesn't look like a five-day work week, that's okay! as long as it helps you work even a little more often when you want to, it's something worth doing.
however, if you're still feeling truly stuck, all hope isn't lost. you can still try:
#2: switch projects
sometimes the reason i'm moving slow is because of a bad brain day, but sometimes the reason is that i just cannot muster the motivation to do the specific task i'm trying to do right now. ADHD is fueled by novelty and interest, and if i'm not interested in what i'm doing, or it's feeling stale, that's a sign that i need to switch gears.
this is why first it's helpful for me to have more than one project going at a time. this might mean completely unrelated works, or it might just mean related tracks as with the music for a game like SLARPG or susan taxpayer.
the idea here is not to start a dozen different projects and bounce around them like i'm playing whac-a-mole—though i have done that. (i don't recommend it.) the idea here is to have a manageable number of different projects i can be working on so that if i get bored or stuck on something, i have fallback options.
what that number of projects is depends entirely on the week. maybe right now it's two, maybe another time it's three. i would probably be getting carried away if i tried more than that, but that's just my own limit. maybe yours is different. that's something for you to think about.
but it doesn't have to stop there.
#3: switch focus
maybe there is this one project that i just HAVE to work on, but the task i'm trying to do at this stage just isn't coming to me. okay, well, why don't i try working on a different task?
let's say i can't figure out what i want to do with the melody in one part of the song:
what if i try jumping ahead to a different part of the melody? ...no, i'm stumped on melodies today. okay, how about working on the drums instead? ...hmm no, i think i'm just completely tapped out on writing parts right now. alright, what if i organized my tracks, making sure they're all grouped and named in a way that i can work with easily? what if i did a rough volume balance for the mix?
and so on. if that's not enough to shake the off stuckness, i might consider: what can i do to make this project more interesting to me?
what happens if i try using an instrument or effect that i almost never reach for? what if i try sampling something obscure? what if i bang out the drums using my midi keyboard instead of drawing it in on the piano roll?
any approach that breaks me out of my usual habits is bound to get that feeling of novelty and fun back when i need it.
or maybe i can't do any of that right now, and so i take the time to answer a question from a fellow musician instead. i consider that part of my work, too, in a broader sense. check in with yourself and figure out what you can do right now. the rest will still be there later.
but okay, let's say you try switching gears, and switching again, and again, and nothing is moving. you try new approaches, but that wall of awful is insurmountable in this moment. it happens! the next thing you might try is:
#4: learn something new
when you aren't able to make progress on your projects, you can still make progress on your knowledge and craft. i often find this stokes a flame of inspiration in me where there wasn't one before. and even when it doesn't, it still gets my brain out of that feeling of stuckness and dread and into one of thought and action. learning also benefits in the long term because it adds to the well of knowledge from which you draw for all your future works.
for all the awfulness that exists on the internet, it remains an absolute treasure trove of teaching. there's an endless ocean of videos, blog posts, and articles from which you might learn something about your craft. (and if you sail the seven seas, plenty of book PDFs as well. 🦜🏴‍☠️)
it's true that the quality and depth of information out there can vary wildly, but in my experience most resources get at least some things right. and the more you research, practice, and figure out what works for you, the better you will learn to differentiate between the advice worth keeping, and the advice to forget. (that goes for all of what i'm saying here, too!)
that said, since our shared focus is music, a few resources i would highly recommend are:
music theory and composition music matters, 12tone, charles cornell, music with myles, 8-bit music theory, and this introduction by andrew huang
mixing and production dan worrall (especially this series for fabfilter), kush after hours, red means recording, andrew huang, alice yalcin efe, in the mix
general inspiration nahre sol, ben levin, david hilowitz, game score fanfare, posy, jerobeam fenderson, open reel ensemble, and ELECTRONICOS FANTASTICOS!
(if any readers have their own helpful resources for creating music or any other media, feel free to share in the replies & reblogs! 💓)
of course, on an especially bad day, it might be a challenge to seek out information, let alone retain it. that can feel pretty bad, but remember: be kind to yourself. the next thing you might consider trying is:
#5: consume art you love
not just music. books. shows. movies. games. illustration. animation. whatever moves and inspires you.
but do it intentionally. don't just pull up some random thing the algorithm suggested! check in with yourself about what you want (or are able) to engage with right now. choose accordingly. if you get a little way into it and realize it's not scratching that itch, hit the bricks. check in with yourself again. wash, rinse, repeat, until you find whatever it is that speaks to you right now.
and do it actively, if you can. don't just let it go in one eye and out the other! really pay attention to the work. what do you like about it? what are its themes and motifs? what makes it work so well? what are its flaws, and how much do they matter? what might you do differently? you can write notes as you do this if it helps, but even simply noticing and thinking goes a long way.
what you don't want to do is come at this with a lens of shame or envy. you're not here just to say to yourself, "ugh, if only i could do THAT." it's okay if it happens. use that thought as a springboard for curiosity: "well okay, how DID they do that? do i have the resources for it? if so, how could i apply that to my own work? if not, how can i adapt it, or what do i need to learn?" keep your mind open and approach the work with a sense of wonder.
as a creative person, it's very easy to think, "i should be making something right now, not watching a movie!" but that thought forgets something vital: your art is a response in a conversation. of course the "language" you use is your own, and maybe if you're lucky you'll invent a new word. but most of the words you use have been around long before you were born. you're just one voice in a dialogue that spans continents and generations, and that's okay. it's even the whole point.
none of us is an island. we are profoundly social animals. just as we can't live without eating, we can't make without learning. so half of making art is consuming it. consider this part of the process as well.
and finally,
#6: rest, and live your life
let's say you're in really dire straits. you've tried working slower. you tried changing focus, you tried changing projects. you want to take in new information or actively engage with your favorite art, but you're not in the headspace for it. what now?
take a nap. take a walk. take a shower. eat a nice meal, or an okay one. talk to a friend. maybe even do that chore you've been putting off (you know the one).
it's human to always crave making, but you're not a machine—and even if you were, machines need regular maintenance, too! you wouldn't drive a car that's completely out of gas, and you won't do yourself any favors treating your body that way either.
i know that when you take a break it feels as though you're not accomplishing anything, but you are: you're taking care of your animal self. and while you do that, your creative brain doesn't stop working! much like windows, it has countless background processes running at any given moment, with inscrutable names like "cbdhsvc_692da" or "Microsoft Edge Update Service." it's true, i checked.
when you're stuck on a project and you step away to rest, your brain is still chipping away at your ideas unconsciously. i like to tell people, "it's percolating." much like waiting for a pot of water to boil, that idea is still heating up, even when you take a step away. just be sure to check in on it once in a while. the time will pass, and it'll be boiling again before long. :)
before i go, i'll leave you with one last thing to keep in mind as you try all of these strategies:
be kind to yourself.
being human is just about one of the hardest things you can do. let alone being a human trying to survive capitalism while living with disabilities! the last thing you need on top of that is to overwork yourself, talk to yourself negatively, or treat yourself harshly. there are plenty of other people in the world who do that to you—don't be one of them.
i'm not saying that you shouldn't try to challenge yourself, to test your limits and go above and beyond your ambitions, if that's what you want to do. just remember that hard work and self compassion are not mutually exclusive. so be careful not to bully yourself. take pride in the progress you make, even when it seems small. encourage yourself like you would a friend who's going through a hard time. and when you challenge yourself, be your own cheerleader.
i hope you find this advice helpful! remember, this is just what helps me, so don't feel like you have to follow any of it exactly. maybe taking time to learn new information helps break you out of your rut more than working slowly, so you reach for that tool first. maybe having multiple projects going at once is too distracting for you, so you prefer to stick to one at a time. whatever your needs are, feel free to alter and adapt these ideas to fit you.
thank you for reading, and i wish you the best of luck in your creating.
with care, bee 🐦
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planetception · 3 months
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Pain and Heartbreak - Paige Bueckers
My first ever fanfic! Sorry if it sounds bad, I'm just getting back into writing. Hope you guys enjoy!
Summary: Paige yells at you for being too clingy while Kk is on a live
Cw: Asshole Paige, hurt and no comfort, mentions of past verbal abusive relationship
pt 2
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You always believed that Paige was okay with your clinginess. She never showed any signs of annoyance or discomfort when you sat on her lap or buried your face in her neck during emotional moments. You were convinced she didn't mind your constant attachment, except when she had practice. Even then, she would call you whenever she had the chance, just to check on you and see how you were doing. You thought Paige was the most caring girlfriend, until she wasn't.
Things came to a crashing point one night when Kk decided to do a late night live. You had just returned to the dorm Kk and Paige shared, feeling exhausted and yearning for Paige’s warm embrace. As you walked in, you quickly greet Kk and the live audience before heading straight to Paige’s room. Opening the door quietly, you saw your girlfriend with her ipad propped up on her nightstand as she was half asleep. Giggling to yourself as you changed into more comfortable clothes before snuggling up to a sleepy Paige, your face found its usual spot buried in Paige’s neck, but when you did that she pushed you off of her.
“Not now Y/n.” She told you in a monotone voice as she got off the bed and headed out to the living room. You looked visibly hurt as you watched your girlfriend leave you all alone in her bed. Seconds later, you could hear Paige and Kk entertain the live as the audience asked questions and such. Once again you felt hurt as she was acting more like herself on the live than she was with you minutes ago. Shortly Paige comes back and immediately sighs as she sees that you’re still awake. “You’re still awake?” She asks monotonously, her blue eyes piercing into yours. You just nodded as she crawled into bed next to you, when you tried to cuddle with her, she once again pushed you right off of her. Now it was your turn to get annoyed by her actions as you sat up in her bed. “What’s gotten into you recently?” You asked her as she rolled her eyes at you. “What??” She sounds offended, “Nothing has gotten into me ok? I’m tired as hell and I want to go to bed. Is that so hard to understand?” Now she’s starting to talk to you like a child.
You just stared at her, feeling a sharp sting of hurt and embarrassment. It was as if you were a child being scolded by a parent. Paige, clearly exasperated, rolled her eyes and turned away from you in bed, her back a cold, unyielding wall.
“Pai-” You tried to get out before she cut you off immediately.
“Would you leave me the fuck alone!? God you’re so fucking clingy and shit, fucking pissing me off every goddamn day!” She screamed at you.
You just stared at her as tears began falling down your face. You knew that the live heard Paige just scream at you for being too clingy. Paige just looked at you with an annoyed expression and just belittled you even more.
“Great. Now you’re fucking crying. This is why she left you isn’t it Y/n? She probably got sick of your constant whining and pathetic neediness every second didn't she?”
At this point, tears were streaming down your face at an uncontrollable pace. You jumped out of Paige’s bed, hastily grabbing your belongings before bolting out of her room. You ran past Kk, who was frantically trying to apologize to her live audience for the yelling before quickly ending the stream. She knew immediately that people would be talking about this incident by morning and that Geno was bound to hear about it.
You walked down the street, replaying Paige’s hurtful words over and over again in your mind. Tears were still streaming down your face, leaving a salty trail on your cheeks, as your phone kept blowing up, you don’t even want to look at it right now. You knew that it was probably Kk asking if you were okay, or it was the media spreading the clip of the yelling around.
Eventually you reached your apartment. Walking inside you threw your phone onto the couch as you toppled to the ground sobbing uncontrollably. Paige never yelled at you like that before. She knew how your last girlfriend constantly berated you for the smallest things. This betrayal from Paige felt like a hot knife twisting in your heart, each tear a testament to the pain you thought you had escaped from.
You ended up falling asleep on the floor that night, exhaustion and sorrow overtaking you. When you woke up you reached for your phone with shaky and took a deep breath before checking your notifications. You had around 15 texts in total, most of them came from Kk, a few from both Nika and Azzi, and surprisingly none from Paige. The absence of her name felt like a fresh wound. The next thing you checked was twitter, the video of Paige screaming at you in the background of Kk’s live was all on your timeline. Most people were sympathizing with you, condemning Paige’s actions, while some people praised Kk for her handling of the situation.
The next thing you saw made your jaw drop, it was a statement from Paige’s twitter account. Her statement gave you mixed emotions, it was like she didn’t even feel sorry for what she did and that made your heart break even more.
“Hi this is Paige Bueckers and I wanted to deeply apologize for my actions that were heard in a live last night. This does not reflect how I am as a person and I am genuinely sorry for any commotion that was caused last night. While what I said may be seen as hurtful to some, but put yourself in my shoes in that instant and you would blow up too-”
You couldn’t even finish reading it before you threw your phone across the living room collapsing into tears once more. That marked the heartbreaking end of your and Paige’s relationship, leaving you with a sense of despair. After enduring two devastating experiences that ended in such familiar fashion, you swore off dating all together.
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pepsiboyy · 5 months
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BELLYACHE.
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pairing: chris sturniolo x fem!reader summary: where reader comes home after a long day with a stomach ache to her loving boyfriend :p warnings: established relationship, use of y/n lol, FLUFFF!!!!!!!!!!!, cursing a/n: hi idk i thought of this and wrote it in like 20 min and u guys are BOMBING cruise control so YAYYY i hope it is freaking awesome love u all <33
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your breath was shaky and your eyes were lidded as you searched for your keys in all of your pockets. the fresh love hoodie that draped over your body was the only thing keeping you at a decent body temperature as you stood outside the triplets' home, a hand clutching your stomach. it had been aching since earlier today, and you couldn't help but assume it was just your cramps.
"fuckin, where is it."
your eyes scanned your backpack, now, for the spare.
"there you are."
you quickly grab the key and open the front door with it, letting out a deep sigh of relief as you let yourself in and shut the door quickly, yet quietly behind you.
after a long day of nonstop work and being on your feet, you were just ready to lay down with your boyfriend. tomorrow was your first day off in about a week now. your body couldn't take anymore, especially not the nonstop stabbing pains that no amount of painkiller seemed to kill.
with a deep sigh, you set your things down at the kitchen table and moved to grab a soda in the fridge. you took two pepsis from their box and shut the fridge, smiling softly to yourself at the thought of your boyfriend's expression when receiving a pepsi from you.
finally, a moment to yourself and your boyfriend where you two can relax and not worry about you having work the next morning. relax and just have your boy to yourself, relax and just-
thud.
your eyes widened and your body froze its movements as one of the pepsis rolled down the stairs and cracked open, exploding all over the floor and against the cabinets.
footsteps came rushing up the stairs, and you turned your head to see your boyfriend, chris, hair disheveled like he had just awoken from the best sleep of his life.
"y/n? are you okay?"
you set the other pepsi down and let your arms fall to your sides, tears running down your cheeks.
"hey hey hey," chris quickly made his way over and, careful not to step in the soda on the floor, stood in front of you and cradled your face in his hands. "what's wrong my love? it's just a pepsi, and-"
"it was the last one." you mumbled before burying your face into your hands.
"it's okay, really, you can have this one," he held up the pepsi that you had set on the counter. "or we can share it," he chuckled, knowing you would offer.
you let out a deep sigh and shook your head, looking at chris for a moment before looking away. "i just want to be with you. i'm tired of being on my feet, i'm sick of work, i'm sick of people, my stomach is killing me and it won't stop," you sniffled, looking up at him.
chris nodded as he listened closely before coming forward and setting a hand against your cheek. he gently kissed your forehead and wiped your tears with his thumbs. "go get changed into something comfortable, i will clean this up." he whispered softly, smiling reassuringly at you.
with a soft nod, you collected your things, including the stray pepsi and made your way down the stairs and into chris's room.
you let out a deep sigh as you took in the scent of his room, almost immediately feeling comfort. you set your backpack down by his desk and began changing into some pajamas you had laying around in chris's room. you pulled the hoodie back over you and shifted to carefully lay against chris's bed, your mind and body finding comfort in his sheets while trying to ignore the undying pain in your stomach.
your eyes almost immediately began to close.
"how you feelin?"
you lifted your head to see chris, smiling softly when noticing the cup of chamomile tea and some painkillers. he shut the door behind him with his foot and made his way over to the bedside table, setting them down by you.
"'m okay." you mumbled as you smiled brightly at him.
god, you loved him so much. it's the little things. really.
chris nodded as he shifted to lay beside you, humming to himself in the process.
you took a sip of the tea he made for you, humming at the taste and setting it down. "thank you for the tea, really."
chris nodded as he shifted to lay down, his head in the crook of your neck now as he gently pulled you against him by your waist.
his hand moved to gently tuck under your fresh love hoodie and gently graze your stomach, his hand resting there softly.
your face felt hot. every time chris got remotely close to you, it did. this kid gave you butterflies at any given moment.
"is this okay?"
chris's voice ripped you from your thoughts as you nodded and closed your eyes, moving to gently wrap your arms around his shoulders, one of your hands moving to gently bury into his hair.
chris hummed as he felt your touch, his eyes closing as he allowed his thumb to graze back and forth on your skin softly.
"get some sleep alright?" chris mumbled softly, his voice groggy.
you smile softly and nodded, as you knew chris was already beginning to trail off.
"i love you so much," you whispered, eyes closing as you leaned down to gently kiss the top of his head, before you allowed your head to fall back and and your mind slowly drift to asleep.
"i love you too, y/n."
chris fell asleep, his hand never removing itself from your stomach and/or waist and his breath soft against your chest.
and when you woke up, your bellyache was gone.
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penguinsfly · 7 months
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I unfortunately saw something I didn't want to see and that was my last straw. I'm fucking doing this.
Let's establish this first. Alastor is stated in the show to be asexual that is not up to discussion. He is also very heavily implied in the same conversation to be aromatic. 'An Ace in the hole' being used in context of him being with Charlie is also implying his aromanticism.
VIDEO
If that's not enough then here is Viv speaking about his romantic orientation. It's pretty clear despite the fact that afterwards she said it's okay to headcanon whatever (it's not but I will get o that later) that he is written purely as an aro ace character.
On top of that going by Alastor's interaction with Angel from the pilot and the first episode it is clear that he is sex repulsed. Not only that but on the fandom website he is stated to be touch averse with two sources which you can check out on the website.
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Hazbin hotel wiki, Alastor page
Now we established that Alastor is canonically Asexual, Aromantic, Sex Repulsed and Touch Averse
As I also am all of the above I'll try to explain everything to the best of my ability as simply as I can.
Aromanticism and Asexuality.
I'm probably targeting the audience that knows those terms but regardless I will explain it anyway.
Aromantic - people that experience little to no romantic attraction towards any gender
Asexual - people that experience little to no sexual attraction towards any gender.
Little to no
Asexuality and aromanticism are spectrums in which people can feel certain attractions towards people but those attractions are less occurring or are defined by personal connection.
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Diagram from AVEN website
However some people are at the end of the spectrum, they never felt attraction and that's valid. Alastor was stated to be aroace he wasn't written as demi or as gray he was written as aroace as in the end of the spectrum. His repulsion and not giving shit about romance or sex speaks for itself.
Representation
I do understand that everyone wants to be represented but it's so important to understand that aroace people are one of the most underrepresented queer groups in the media.
And I'm not here to scream about how I want my fav character to be just like me I don't care for it I'm way too confident in my orientation to rely on that however I'm tired of explaining to people what asexuality and aromanticism is just to receive 'are you sure' or 'you'll change your mind' or 'its not real' or the community favourite 'you'll find the right person' no I won't I'm not looking thank you very much (I just smile and nod to be polite and I'm sick of it).
'Harmless' buts like: 'He might be on the spectrum', 'AroAce people can still feel attraction' hurt the final outcome for all the people on the spectrum not only strictly aroaces because it allows people to write one shots with 'Demi Alastor' that falls in love in 2000 words because he is 'demi' (spoiler alert: they don't understand what that label means). It's just a cover, an opening, sneaky way to disregard his orientation, feel good about themselves and move on. Newsflash there is no moving on for aroace people it's our life.
Shipping
Shipping is just harmless fun right? Usually yes but not in this case. In the same way its not okay to ship gay characters with genders they are not attracted to.
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It's erasure and since there is much less people identifying on aro/ace spectrums then there is gay or bi people our voices are being silenced. Not to mention that gay people received support from entire LGBTQIA+ community over the years in contrast to aro/ace specs who to this day are told that we are 'not queer enough' or 'not oppressed enough' often by other queer people.
And finally... FINALLY we get cannon Aro/Ace character that is clearly not interested in romance and sex. Character that beats stereotypes of boring and timid aro/ace people and what's the first people do? They ship him. Alastor's storyline provides so many points to be explored like 'what is his backstory', ' what's about his deal', ' how does he fit in in the found family trope' , 'does he care about hotel guests' yet people choose to write about the only thing that he is not interested in. As a heavily repulsed person that used to be horrified about the fact that I'll have to fall in love with somebody at some point before I found out what aro/ace is I find it repulsive and trust me he would too.
But Viv said it's okay!
Its the same point once again. What if Viv said that it's okay to ship gay Angel with woman. She doesn't have authority to say shit like that.
Queerplatonic relationships
I can't tell you not to do it I don't think he would be necessary interested in it but for fuck sake do your research and try to understand what queerplatonic means before you use it as a cover to shamelessly ship him. Respect the fact that he is sex repulsed and touch averse and you're fine.
Why can't you just avoid it?
First of all I shouldn't have to. Alastor's orientation should be respected in the fandom like any other orientation is. Second of all I've tried. I tried to only look up AroAce Alastor tag I've blocked over 80 people on tumblr alone (I just counted) to avoid to see anything that could trigger me and I'm not talking about slightly shippy posts or fanarts I'm talking about full blown disregard towards his orientation. Guess what it didn't work!
Archive of our own where do I start. I've used this website for over a decade and I could probably count days I didn't go there on my fingers. I'm fluent in AO3 I know which tags I should block. I know how to skim thorough the summary and tags to see if I'm interested. I've seen shit I'm a shipper I've been on ao3 for ten years but never had to mentally prepare myself to face queerphobia as I click on the tab.
Just use aro/ace Alastor tag.
I do and let me tell you people can't tag for shit or they just pretend to be clueless at this point. Besides see this?
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there is more ff with Alastor/reader (disgusting) than there is Alastor with his canon orientation and to play the devils advocate for arophobic people there is more Angel/Alastor then his stated in the show sexuality. I understand that fandom goes back before the show was aired but Viv confirmed his orientation back then too.
Summary
I could go on and on bout different issues and maybe I will in the future but I'm not wasting anymore of this weekend on it. I'm ready to answer any questions as long as they are respectful.
I'm aware that he is a fictional character, it doesn't affect him in any way whatsoever but it does affect aromantic and asexual people keep it in mind.
If there are any mistakes grammar related I'm not sorry I'm fluent in English (not my first language) but I took 3h nap in between and I'm sleep deprived.
Have a nice day.
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woso-dreamzzz · 9 months
Text
New Girlfriend
Lucy Bronze x Teen!Reader
Ona Batlle x Bronze!Reader
Summary: You adjust to your Mum's new girlfriend
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Lucy rolls over in her sleep, blinking awake slowly.
She jerks away when she comes face to face with you.
"It's two in the morning!" She whisper-yells," How did you get in here?!"
"Are you sleeping with Ona Batlle?"
"What?!"
You roll over onto your back, staring up at the ceiling. "Well...you're not sleeping with Keira anymore."
Lucy groans, wiping a hand over her face. She'd recently given you the sex talk (you had just turned thirteen and she'd decided it was time) and was now regretting it.
"Did you really sneak in here to ask me that at...Two in the morning?!"
You ignore her question. "And everyone online is speculating about it. You drive her to training a lot. Are you sleeping with her?"
"This isn't a conversation we need to be having."
"How long have you been sleeping with her?" You ask," You were all cosy after the World Cup and she's been around her a few times. Are you sleeping with her?"
"Do you really need to know this?"
"I'd like to know if my mother's sleeping with someone regularly," You reply," Especially if that person comes around as often as Ona is."
"Go back to your room," Lucy orders," It's too early. I'm too tired. We'll talk later."
Only...she doesn't talk to you later and you grow more suspicious of Ona every time she comes to visit.
You're sitting at the kitchen table, answering questions on your mind-numbingly boring homework worksheet.
Mum and Ona are cuddled up together on the sofa before Mum gets up to get more popcorn, ruffling your hair as she passes you to get to the microwave.
Your eyes track her as she goes so you don't even notice Ona until she's standing in front of you.
She looks a little awkward as she smiles. "How is school?"
You don't quite know what to think of her since your revelation that she and your Mum were kind of sleeping together. So, you just offer her a blunt answer. "Fine."
She nods once, suddenly stumped at having to carry on the conversation.
You don't offer her any leeway and go back to your question, scrawling something randomly. You sweep your textbooks into your arms and whistle for Narla, retreating into your room.
"Why do you keep coming in here?!" Your mum demands that night when she wakes up to find you on the other side of her bed.
"If you and Ona are sleeping together," You say, ignoring her outrage," Does this mean we have to move? Or is she moving in with us? Keira used to live with us."
Mum rolls over and screams her annoyance into her pillow. "Do we really have to have these conversations when I'm trying to sleep?"
"Well, maybe, if you stopped avoiding them when you're awake then we wouldn't have to do them now."
She swats at you with her pillow. "Where is this coming from? Why, do you not like Ona?"
"Would it matter if I didn't?"
"You were all for Ona before you realised we were together."
"Because I thought you were making friends," You admit," Is she going to be here all the time?"
"Go back to bed," Mum says like every time you drift into a conversation she doesn't want to have with you," It's too early for this."
Mum gets sick a few weeks later and takes the day off training. Usually, this means you take the day off school because it's too far for you to walk and, with Mum ill, it means she can't drive either.
You've already begun to plan your day off (you got a new video game from Keira for your birthday and are ready to try it out) when the front door opens and Ona walks in.
You didn't even know she had a key.
"Hey," She says," Are you ready to go?"
You frown. "Where?"
"To school? Lucy called me to pick you up."
You send a wounded look over to your mother, who has made herself comfortable on the sofa and doesn't look to be moving for the foreseeable future.
She waves you away with her hand. "Off you go. Don't you have that test today?"
Begrudgingly, you change into your uniform, grab your bag and moodily follow Ona out to her car.
"So," She says, drumming her fingers against the wheel," Are you prepared for your test?"
"We don't need to make small talk," You say bluntly, staring out the window.
She's silent for a moment, no sound over the gentle hum of the car.
The light turns green and she takes a left turn instead of a right.
"You're going the wrong way," You say with an eye roll, slumping in your seat.
Ona fishes her phone out of her pocket and throws it at you. You glare at her but catch it, typing in the password she tells you to.
"Your school should already be saved," She says as she takes another turn, taking you further and further away from school," Dial them and put it on speaker."
Ona makes up an excuse that you're sick just as she pulls up in front of an arcade. She gets out and you stumble after her.
"I'm meant to be at school! You told Mum you'd take me to school!"
"Yes," Ona says," I did but I thought we could spend the day together."
You give her a look and cross your arms over your chest. "I have a test today."
"That you actually want to do?"
She's got you there but you refuse to give her satisfaction.
"I don't have money."
"I do."
You narrow your eyes at her and huff. "Fine! But I'm not going to be happy about this!" It's a complete lie. Mum doesn't like arcades. She says that they're stealing all your money so she rarely lets you go and it's even rarer that she gives you money for them.
You lose yourself in repetitive pinball and penny machines for hours, collecting tickets and taking great satisfaction in absolutely thrashing Ona at air hockey.
Your fun day almost makes it so you can forget your anger at her. Almost.
She gets you pizza and a drink and you find yourself sitting opposite her in a booth at the very back.
"You're not my mum," You tell her eventually," And I'm not calling you mum."
Ona beams at you and you hate that you find yourself smiling back. "I don't expect you to."
"And I reserve the right to have first dibs of Mum's bed," You continue.
It's an odd request but Ona takes it in her stride. "Okay."
You stare at her through narrowed eyes. "My test went fine," You say eventually," You dropped me off fifteen minutes early and waited around till I entered the building. You picked me up. We talked. We're civil. Cool with you?"
"Sounds good."
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bloodlust-1 · 9 months
Text
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ Soaked .𖥔 ݁ ˖
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Wyll x fem Tav — fluff, Explicit 18+
Summary: Tav's tent is leaking from the heavy rain, leaving her completely soaked, and well - she has to share a tent with someone.
Notes: absolutely nobody asked for this. BUT! I've never read a Wyll fic and I wanted to change that for myself and maybe for some of you ;p Heavy Petting!!
Shit! Tav groggily opened her eyes, only to see the sight of her drenched tent. The rain had seeped through the flimsy fabric, leaving everything inside completely soaked. She let out a frustrated groan, cursing her laziness for not setting up her tent properly earlier that day.
The once comfortable bedroll of blankets and pillows was now a soggy mess, and Tav knew she would be shivering in her damp sleeping bag.
How could she be so careless? She puffed her cheeks out, where the hells is she going to sleep tonight? It was down pouring and Tav needed to get to somewhere dry so she wouldn't get sick.
"Damn it!" She stepped out of the tent, shielding her eyes from the rain. It beaded down on her skin like bullets.
Breathless and drenched, she burst into Wyll's tent, startling him from his sleep. His eyes widened in surprise as he sat up, trying to make sense of the sudden intrusion. But as he recognized her, he relaxed and a small smile crept onto his face, "Tav?"
"What brings you to my humble abode at this ungodly hour?" he rubbed his eyes with a small yawn.
Tav sighed as she pushed back the wet strands of hair that were sticking to her forehead. She half smiled for awkwardly bursting into his tent. "Looks like my tent couldn't handle the rain," She joked shallowly, "and now everything inside is pretty much ruined."
Leave it to Tav to have the worst luck when it comes to camping.
"Do you mind if I bunk with you for the night?" The rain beat against the ground with such force, that it was almost intimidating.
Wyll's tired eyes scanned Tav up and down. Exhaustion and concern were etched across his face as he quickly rummaged through the corner of his tent. Without hesitation, he grabbed one of his own shirts and tossed it towards Tav.
"Here, take this," he said with a hint of urgency in his voice. "I can't have you getting sick in those wet clothes." Wyll's protective nature kicked in.
Tav's fingers tightly gripped the shirt, her eyes fixed on Wyll's stunned expression. It was almost comical how his mouth formed a perfect 'o' shape as the realization dawned on him. "Oh!" In a split second, he spun around, giving Tav a chance to change in privacy.
Tav chuckled at Wyll's reaction. She always found his dramatic responses amusing. But now, as she stood there clutching the shirt, she couldn't help but feel a twinge of nervousness. After all, Wyll was someone she thought attractive.
Even in this sorry state, Tav still managed to look pretty damn cute. He couldn't believe she was in his tent, wearing his shirt and changing right behind him.
"Okay, I'm done," she announced, tapping on Wyll's shoulder. He couldn't help but admire her, even in this awkward situation. The way the shirt hung off her curves that stopped at her mid-thighs was quite the sight.
"Sorry about that," Tav said, biting her lip as she tried to contain her awkwardness. "Thanks for letting me borrow your shirt. It's much appreciated." Tav slowly sank onto the floor, trying to get comfortable.
"Wait -" Wyll spoke out instantly.
"Hm?'
He squinted his eyes toward the floor. “Where’s your bedroll?”
Tav scuffed sarcastically, “Soaked.”
Sure, this wasn't the most comfortable situation for her, but it was dry and warm. But this was not good enough for Wyll, he would never let a lady sleep on the floor.
"That's not happening." He sighed and shook his head. Wyll lifted up the covers to his bedding, nudging his head at Tav, "Climb in."
Tav signed in relief, quickly hopping into the bed with Wyll. Her skin lit up with a tingling sensation from the unexpected contact of his skin. It was a bit nerve-wracking, to be this close to him, but she couldn't deny the butterflies that bubbled up inside her.
Just as Tav climbed in Wyll's horn accidentally got caught in her hair. He tried to pull away when he noticed. In a panic, he tugged harder, which only made Tav wince in pain.
"Ouch!" Tav winced, her hand going to her hair as she felt the sudden tug. But before she could even say anything, Wyll was already apologizing profusely.
"S-Sorry!" Wyll stammered. And in that moment, he noticed how close their faces were, their breaths hitting each other in the air.
Tav blushed, She quickly peeled off the strands from Wyll's horn, trying to untangle them as gently as possible. "You're okay, Wyll," she reassured him, "I'm sorry for this nest on my head right now."
Once untangled, Tav squished against Wyll. They both laid silently, trying to shake off their racing hearts. How in the hells were they supposed to sleep now when all they could think about was how closely their skin was touching right now.
"I think you look lovely." Wyll suddenly spoke into the air as he laid on his back.
Tav tilted her head towards him, "Huh?" Her face felt hot for a second, "Oh! You're talking about before..." She felt shy and chuckled amusingly, "Thank you, Wyll..."
He nodded his head in contempt. But Tav spoke up too, "You look good too...I don't think I've ever seen you look bad though when I think about it."
Wyll twisted his body to face Tav, his eyebrow slowly arched upwards "Even with these hideous horns and eyes?" He seemed skeptical.
"Yeah, I never thought of you ugly." Tav was being honest with him and it felt - nice.
Wyll's soft smile twisted into a scowl. "What’s wrong?" Tav asked with concern.
"Zariel. I could hear her in my head." He closed his eyes tightly, and let out a frustrated sigh before responding, "And you'd think she'd be off doing something better than to tease me."
"What is she teasing you about..?"
Wyll's eyes crinkled with a soft smile and giggle, "Ahh..That's a conversation for another day."
Tav brought herself closer to him, she gave him a playful nudge, "What? No - don't be such a buzz kill." she puffed out her cheeks like a child.
"You're too cute." Wyll's eyes softened as she looked into Tav's sincere gaze. "If you really must know, she was making comments about me looking at you."
Tav rolled her eyes sarcastically, "Pfft, why would she make fun of that?"
A smirk spread across his lips, "Well - if I was admiring your beautiful face, then it would give her lots to insult me on."
Tav felt a bit flustered by his comment, but she quickly regained her composure. With a sly smile on her face, "You obviously have good taste. You're quite the charmer, Wyll."
Tav booped his nose, "But don't worry, I won't tell the others. Your secret is safe with me."
Wyll's smirk turned into a genuine smile as he took in her boldness. "I like the way you think."
She felt a sense of pride at his reaction. Tav was used to being the one to surprise people, but it was refreshing to have someone catch her off guard in a good way. "I always speak my mind," she replied confidently.
Wyll chuckled.
Tav gently traced her fingers along his jawline, causing him to shiver in response. "Now tell me - what's really on your mind?"
"Those soft lips, and that little frame," Wyll said, his voice barely above a whisper as he pulled her closer.
Her heart beat faster with each passing second. They were already so close, and it was like an invisible string was pulling them closer and closer. Tav's eyes fluttered close until the warmth of her lips was met with his. It was gentle and soft. Pulling back slightly, she looked up at him with big eyes.
"Is that your way of saying you like what you see?" she teased, her confidence growing by the second.
He chuckled and pulled her in for another kiss, his hands gently caressing her petite frame. She melted into his touch, enjoying the grip of his large hands.
"I more than like it," Wyll replied cockily. "I'm completely captivated by you."
Tav's blood rushed to her face. Everything felt like a dream because just yesterday Wyll was just another attractive man. But now - it felt a little more complicated than that.
Wyll's hand rested on the curve of Tav's lower back. His fingers dipped into her back dimples with gentle strokes, "Even now, I can't help but want to kiss you more."
Tav's fingers traced patterns on Wyll's chest while she gazed into his eyes. Here she was, laid next to the city's righteous rich boy: The Blade of Frontiers. He surely wasn't a disappointment.
Wyll's lips met Tav's in a passionate kiss, their bodies pressed together close-knit. Tav's heart fluttered as Wyll's hand moved from her back to cup her face, deepening the kiss even more.
Their breaths mingled between kisses, and his grip became tighter and possessive. Tav's tongue graced his in a steady motion and her hands clutched the shirt of his back.
Wyll's hands roamed eagerly over Tav's body, his touch sending shivers down her spine. He seemed to put most of his attention on her ass. Wyll actually spent quite some time looking at Tav's body and her bottom was his favorite feature of hers. He filled the palms of his hands with her curves.
He kneaded and groped the pudge of her hips and ass. Tav's body responded instinctively, pressing closer to him, her own hands gripping his shoulders tightly.
With each kiss, the intensity grew, and their bodies molded together. Wyll's hand traveled, his fingers gripped Tav's thigh possessively and pulled her leg up to rest on his hip.
Their hips clashed, each movement sending sparks of pleasure through their bodies. She could feel Wyll's hard length poke at her stomach.
Tav's grip on Wyll tightened, her breath coming in small gasps as she lost herself in the moment. Every touch, every movement, was a desperate attempt to get closer, to feel more of each other.
As their kiss deepened, their bodies moved in perfect synchronization, lost in a dance of passion and desire. Tav's moans mingled with Wyll's, their lips never breaking contact as they explored each other.
Wyll tightly shut his eyes and let out an airy gasp, "You have no idea how much I've been wanting to do that. And now that I have, I can't get enough of you."
Tav planted a single kiss on his cheek, "I never knew how good of a kisser you were.." Her head rested on the nape of Wyll's neck. "I want to keep experiencing that if that's something you want with me?"
a smile spreading across Wyll's face. "Of course. I knew I wanted you from the moment I laid eyes on you."
Any thoughts? Comment 👇🏼 I love to engage!
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Text
Forced Vacation- Part 1
Hero collapsed on the couch, not even bothering to change out of their suit. They were just drifting off when they heard the latch to their window click, then the window opening. Hero groaned. They were so tired, why did they have to deal with a break-in?
They willed themselves to move; they opened their eyes and saw a shadow looming over them. Before they could react, something sharp pierced their thigh. Hero cried out, glaring up at Villain.
“What was that for!?”
“Shh, go back to sleep,” Villain whispered.
“I most certainly will not!” Hero shouted, “I- I… I...mm…”
Hero blinked in an effort to clear their blurry vision. Villain got off of them and started looking around Hero's apartment. Hero rolled off the couch and crashed to the floor with a thud.
“Villain!” Hero slurred, “get back here!”
“Which way to your bedroom?” Villain asked, ignoring them.
“I'm not telling you!”
“Fair enough, I'll find it myself, it's not like you live in a mansion… I should really fix that.”
Villain hummed to themselves while Hero pathetically crawled after them. Villain started going through Hero's dresser, pulling out various garments like- swimwear!?
“Did you just come here to steal my wardrobe?” Hero mumbled.
“Oh please,” Villain scoffed, “who would want these? I have half a mind to call the fashion police. Hm, we'll just pick you up some things along the way.”
Hero was finding it increasingly difficult to focus. Villain stalked over to them, crouching down to inspect them.
“You're not out yet?” Villain asked, tilting their head.
“No,” Hero bit out, “I'm…not…”
Hero's eyes fluttered shut as they collapsed on their side. They distantly felt Villain scoop them up in a bridal carry, then there was nothing.
Hero stirred to a pressure in their ears. Their eyelids slowly lifted and they saw Villain sitting opposite them, reading a book.
“Morning,” Villain drawled, turning a page, “or afternoon. I don't keep track of the time zones up here.”
Up here? Hero ‘s head swiveled to the side. They looked out a small, round window and saw fluffy white clouds and a blue sky. Their eyes went wide. They turned back to Villain, and sprang to their feet. Well, they tried to, but something kept them in place.
“That's for your own safety,” Villain said, gesturing vaguely to the various straps pulled taut across Hero's body, “and my peace of mind.”
“Safety!? A seatbelt is safety, Villain! This is- what even is all this!? Why am I on a plane, why am I strapped down, why did you kidnap me!?”
Villain snapped their fingers, and a henchman brought over a glass of water with a straw. They held it to Hero's lips. Hero then realized how dry their mouth was, and reluctantly drank against their better judgment.
“That's drugged,” Villain said nonchalantly.
Hero froze, having already swallowed most of the water. Villain finally looked up from their book and laughed.
“Oh, your face~,” Villain cackled, “too cute! It's just spring water, Hero, with a little bit of lemon.”
Hero visibly relaxed.
“As for your other questions,” Villain continued, “I know you, Hero, and I know when you're overdoing it. As such, I've decided its in your best interest as my nemesis to arrange a vacation for you; well, for both of us, but mostly you. We're going to a tropical island far away from any cities , criminals, or corrupt justice systems.”
“Villain!” Hero protested.
“Hero!” Villain replied with a smirk.
“I can't go on vacation! I have way too much to do! I-” Hero struggled some more in the restraints “-Let me out!”
“Those are there to make sure you don't try anything reckless,” Villain stated, “so calm down, and enjoy the flight.”
A henchman pushed a button, and a TV lowered down from the ceiling. They put a remote control in Hero's hand, then nodded to Villain.
“You will let me know if you get motion sickness, won't you?” Villain asked, picking their book up again.
“UGH!”
...
When they landed, Villain set their book down and reached in their belt pocket for something. They produced another syringe.
“Oh come on!” Hero whined.
“It's not that bad,” Villain argued, “just a small pinch, look-"
Villain injected the contents into Hero's leg. Hero stifled a yelp. Two henchmen came and unstrapped Hero from their seat. Hero immediately stood, only to lurch forward. Villain caught them easily.
“Falling for me? You flatter me,” Villain teased.
“Get off,” Hero said, “I appreciate the concern, but you can't just kidnap people whenever you feel like it!”
“Of course I can, I'm doing it right now, aren't I?”
Villain lifted Hero up into their arms, walking them off the plane. Hero fought to stay awake. Villain deposited them in a luxury car, climbing in next to them. Hero dozed off a moment later.
Part 2
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strlingsav · 10 months
Note
I need some... toe curling, mouth watering, hair ripping, blood spiking, heart racing, jaw clenching, rough, creamy, absolute filthy Simon...
Tension, tension, tension girl I'm feening
OKAY !! I'll do it!! A little drabble (not rly a drabble) just for you!
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Fighting
– Simon "Ghost" Riley x F!Reader
— Yourself and Simon have an argument.
Explicit sexual content under the cut. Read at your own risk.
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It was like running in circles- endlessly tired, exhausted, and finding yourself in the same fucking place you were when you started. It felt like nothing you ever had to say was reason enough to convince him to change. It was a tireless fight, begging Simon for more affection, more time, more attention than he was able to give.
It didn't stop the irritation from building, though. It crept under your skin when he'd sit on the sofa watching the TV instead of talking with you. When he'd get ready for bed and fall asleep without so much as a "goodnight".
You'd certainly grown sick of the distance. Of feeling like a stranger was living with you. Trying your hardest not to take up space or make a single noise for fear of pushing him even further away. Living in your home had turned into an abysmal state you didn't want to put yourself in.
It hadn't crossed your mind to approach him- not until you'd finally reached your wit's end, finally cracked the porcelain facade that had been saving your relationship. Not anymore.
He didn't expect it- in fact, things were fine, to him. Admittedly, his mind was elsewhere, though he had a good excuse; the toll of deployment. He needed a good reset, a recharge, and in the meantime, he had neglected you. Unintentionally, of course, but still, he'd made you feel unwanted, unloved- nearly a burden.
Your patience had snapped, run so thin it finally tore like a thread under tension. Though he thought nothing of it- his hands had taken hold of your waist, pulling you into his chest as you finished the dishes in the sink. You knew by the rigidity in his muscles and soft breaths against the back of your neck; he wanted you.
Any other time, you wouldn't resist him. The warmth of his palms, the smell of his body- he could pull arousal from even the deepest parts of you. Though now, you recoiled from his touch. You shrunk yourself down, pressing against the counter until he released his grip.
"You tired?" He asked.
You scoffed, so quiet and meek it was nearly pathetic. You were still afraid to say the wrong thing, to send him packing.
"No," You shook your head. Honesty was important, but you weren't sure you were ready to have this argument. So you settled for half-truths and cowardice.
His hands once again reached your hips, large fingers digging into your skin, wrapping a giant forearm around your middle as he pulled you into him.
"You want me to beg?" He mumbled in your ear- so clearly turned on by the idea of begging for a piece of you.
Your eyes clamped shut, swallowing harshly as you tried to resist temptation. It felt good, so fucking good, to feel his hands on you again, to have his voice in your ear, his soft breaths against your skin. You could've crumbled then and there, fallen into him and let him have what he wanted- but your body had a way of preventing such weakness.
You were sad. Instead of utterly aroused, soaking your panties, you felt sick, nauseous. It lodged in your throat, stung at your eyes and twisted your face into a look of contempt.
"You want me now?" You asked, slipping from his grip and throwing your dish towel on the counter.
He raised a brow, watching you. "Thought I was bein' obvious."
"You were," You nodded, your hand finding the counter for balance. "But you just pick and choose when you want me, right?"
His brows furrowed, and he took a step back to allow for some space between you.
"What's that s'posed to mean?" He tilted his head, eyeing you down.
Your heart had begun to race, your chest heaving to keep up with the pulse in your ears.
"You haven't touched me in weeks," You breathed out. "Haven't hardly said a word to me in weeks."
He sighed, hanging his head briefly. His eyes met yours and he nodded slowly.
"Takes time to get myself reacquainted after bein' gone. Thought you understood," He muttered.
"Don't blame me for this," You scoffed, though this time it was audible and poignant. "You want to fuck me but you won't spend time with me? Talk to me?"
He raised his brows in shock, tilting his head as if it could allow him another lead to follow. He stepped closer, trapping you between his arms with your back against the counter. You avoided his eyes, avoided letting him see the tears gathering in your waterline.
"I do wanna fuck you," He answered. His eyes glowered at you, menacing and almost threatening.
Your jaw clenched. A look of disgust crossing your features.
"You think if I didn't fuck you it'd change anything?" He asked, watching your eyes meet his. "You been missin' my attention, sweetheart? I know I miss bein' inside you."
You huffed, nostrils flaring as he brought his lips to your neck. Your hand reached his chest, using all your strength to push him off- he remained a statue, still pinning you against the counter.
"Don't fight me," He murmured. "I know you're mad- needy," He pressed his lips against your jaw, hunched over enough that he could whisper in your ear. "I'll make it up to you, love."
You wanted to roll your eyes, but his voice called to you like a Siren- it nearly made your eyes close to savour just how good it sounded to be taken care of. To be touched, fucked, by him again.
"I missed you," You admitted, still soured by his behaviour. "And you just want to fuck me."
He drew his hand up your side, his large hand encasing your waist.
"Missed you too," He said, like it was obvious. "Can't miss you and want you at the same time?"
His lips were inches from yours, forming a small, nearly unnoticeable smile. He liked the fight, the rejection; it only made him work harder for an even sweeter reward. His fingers worked open the button of your jeans, causing you to stutter.
"Y-you can," You trailed off, your head falling back as he sensuously dragged his lips up your neck, teeth softly scraping your flesh.
"Then what's the problem?" He mumbled.
You sighed, relaxing into his arms as his hand swiftly dove beneath your panties and his fingertips pressed against your clit.
Despite your adamant denial, you were wet. Pulsating, sore, desperate and needy. He was right- you missed his attention. Yearned so deeply for it, it nearly hurt.
His fingers drew soft circles around your clit, your body jolting with every rotation, your knees weakening against him. He had no qualms about holding you up while he touched you, nor when his fingers slid inside you so easily it made him chuckle.
"I'll take proper care of you, sweetheart," He said softly.
His lips met yours, in the middle of a gasp, fighting you to move your lips against his, accept his tongue in your mouth. You did- without hesitation, and let your hands glide over his shoulders so he could hold you up.
"Simon," You muttered. "More- please," You breathed into his neck.
Your hips rocked against his hand, his fingers deep in your pussy, throbbing around his digits while he coaxed whimpers and moans out of you. Your arousal was evident, loud echoes off the apartment walls of the mess he'd made of you.
He loved it. Loved hearing how fucking turned on you were. Loved that your pussy got wet so easily without more than a few strokes of his fingers. Loved that you clenched around his fingers and struggled to get closer, grasped at his shoulders and ground your hips to get more out of him. He liked setting the pace, though. Wanted to watch you cry and beg to go faster, harder.
He'd give you relief with his cock, instead. Wouldn't want to waste the feeling of your pussy tightening around him- it always made him cum even harder when you milked his cock. He withdrew his fingers, forcefully lifting you from the ground.
He entrapped your lips with his again, trudging down the dark hallway until he found the light of your bedroom and kicked the door open. He set you down, lifting his shirt over his head so you could run your hands over his abdomen.
You shivered, his broad shoulders flexing, swaying as he maneuvered toward you, forcing the back of your knees to hit the bed. You fell back, sitting on the bed and staring up at him expectantly.
"Turn over," He ordered, watching with amusement as you scurried to land on all fours.
Your head peered over your shoulder, lowering yourself to the bed as he stepped behind you. His belt clanked as he pulled it open, tugging his jeans down to reveal his cock. He'd been struggling with his own desire- as much as he'd missed you, he couldn't ever properly fuck you unless he knew he would be totally, completely present.
He ran his palms over your ass, drawing a shudder from your body as the warmth crept further up your waist. He lined himself up with your weeping cunt, slowly working his way inside with short, soft thrusts until his hips met your ass.
You were breathless- mouth agape, eyes fluttering shut as his cock nudged your cervix, stretching you out enough that your body erupted with goosebumps. He grunted softly at the feel of your pussy around him, the deliciously wet, plush walls inadvertently pulling him in. He too, shuddered, then bent at the waist to mould his chest to your back.
"'M sorry," He breathed against your shoulder blades. "Been neglectin' you."
It didn't bother you that Simon apologized when he was inside you- he was already vulnerable, already bearing himself to you; the apology sent warmth radiating through you.
"It's okay," You slurred, twisting your body to find his dark eyes already watching you. "Don't stop," You muttered, breathing out. "Just don't stop, baby- please," You moaned out, guttural and breathless while his thrusts pushed you forward on your hands.
His soft lips touched your shoulder, wrapping an arm beneath you to pull your back even closer, using his other hand to adjust the flesh of your ass so he could bury his cock even deeper inside you.
"Neglected this sweet fuckin' cunt too," He groaned. "Can never stay away from you- never get enough."
You sighed aloud, especially as his cock withdrew from your walls, leaving you empty and hollow- before sliding back inside. His arm moved to cling around your waist, his hard fingers sliding down your stomach to rub at your swollen clit fervidly.
"Don't do it again," You chided, though with half of your usual authority while he rutted his hips up against you. "I missed you," You muttered.
He left another gentle kiss against your shoulder, now breathing a bit heavier in your ear. You could feel the Adonis belt of his abdomen hit your ass, his dick angled just right as it rubbed inside you, his calloused fingers rubbing back and forth across your clit; your stomach had begun to tighten.
"Missed you too," He uttered, exhaling sharply when your pussy clenched around him. "Bloody fuckin' hell I missed you."
"Simon-" You gasped, your climax approaching at an unexpected pace while his words hit your ear, warm breath tingling your skin. "Keep going- I'm so close," You whined, your hips pushing backwards to force him inside you, faster, harder.
"Christ, love," He grunted. "Keep doin' that, 'n' I'm fuckin' done in," He chuckled, short and deep, hardly long enough for you to notice, but it moved through your back.
You came shortly after- knuckles white with the strength of your grip on the sheets, lips parted in a gasp, a heavy groan vibrating from your chest. Your stomach tensed, pussy tightening around his cock in short bursts, making his hips stutter with every thrust. As your eyes clenched shut, a black abyss of swirls and stars appearing behind your eyelids, you breathed out finally.
He wasn't far behind, finishing inside you as he always did, though he stayed still for a moment after, catching his breath. And when he finally came down from his climax, he fell to the bed, pulling you into his arms.
A soft kiss on your temple, his dick still lodged inside your worn pussy, coated with his cum, and he muttered a quiet, 'Night, love. We'll talk in the mornin'."
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amymbona · 3 months
Text
Messy boyfriend Patrick Zweig x sick f!reader
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Warnings: none, the tiniest bit of cursing
Word count: 1,5 K
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
Patrick is the messiest boyfriend ever, I'm convinced. He's never taken the family life too seriously before, it was always just a little fuckie-fuck, perhaps a night spent at the girl's place if she whines loud enough upon him getting up from the bed, but you changed it all.
With you, Patrick has learnt what a relationship truly is about. Despite him swearing to be the alpha, you are the giver. And the only thing you actually take is care about him.
It's little details. Details that never crossed Patrick's mind before. You make sure to bring him a little snack to practice, some protein sticks (you've noticed he likes the ones with little pieces of banana the most), dry his damp forehead with a towel and let him know when the laces on his shoes are undone. It's natural, almost automatic, for you to cook for him, to wash whatever clothing article he leaves at your place, to take motherly care od Patrick. With you, he has discovered a whole new world of tenderness and soft love.
He's so smitten with you, so eager for the attention and care that you are willing to give him. He's looking forward to every meeting of yours, and not only for the inexpressibly satisfying moments you two share naked in bed, but mainly for the little kisses you'd plant on his forehead and all the kind words from your mouth. But when you don't show up to his place one day, he's immediately concerned.
Patty poo: where r u sexy?👅
Y/N ❤️: sick :(
Patty poo: omw
Y/N ❤️: can u buy pads?
"I didn't know what size." Patrick basically breaks the door to your place from its hinges, pattering to your bedroom where he's met with the sight of you in bed.
"Hey." you smile tiredly, rubbing your eyes. It appears you're not even close to crawling out of the comforting warmth of your blanket, voice slightly sore as if you've just woken up.
Two plastic bags in his hands, Patrick plops down on the bed next to you. He leans in, kissing your forehead tenderly, eyes roaming over your face for all the possible signs of sickness. There are purple circles pronounced under your eyes and your expression is significantly less enthusiastic than usual.
He begins unpacking the contents of his quick shopping spree, dropping three packs of different size pads onto your blanket. "Why's there so many sizes, Y/N? And what the hell are wings for? You need fucking doctorate to understand that."
It makes you laugh, laugh at how incredibly adorable your boyfriend is. His confusion is so adorable to you. "That depends on how much you bleed, honey." you let him know and pick up one of the packs. Luckily, he chose your favoured size.
"Women are weird." Patrick mumbles under his breath, showing you some sweets he bought for you. Your favourites again. "I got you some gummy bears, oh, and the chocolate chip cookies you mentioned the other day. I got ones with white chocolate too."
"Baby -" you attempt to silence Patrick but he's too focused on rambling, tongue flicking over his pink lips as he keeps talking. So you try again. "Pat. Can you make me some tea?"
Oh, the sight of you. His perfect girlfriend, always the mom among the two, bound to your bed because of your period and some cold you've caught god knows where and from god knows who. Your eyes are heavy and the smile on your face is almost nonexistent from how tired all your muscles are but, god, are you still a piece of art. In Patrick's eyes, you are utterly flawless, whatever condition you are in.
"Sure, baby."
Patrick is on his feet within a second, jumping around your apartment like a lamb. Closing your eyes, you let your head drop back against the pillow, throwing an arm over your warm forehead. Your tranquil state is disturbed as Patrick yells from the kitchen where the fuck do you keep your cups, as if he hasn't been in your apartment before. "Above the sink!"
And he's in your room again, carrying five packagings of different tea flavours in his hands. "Which one?" he asks in a small voice, an obviously worried expression on his face. You peek one eye open, chuckling at the little disaster your boyfriend is. One box rolls down the makeshift column and falls between Patrick's feet, earning a soft goddamn from his mouth.
"None of these." you respond softly, shifting in your bed with a small groan as pain shoots up from your lower tummy. Reaching to the bedside table, you fish for a issue. "In the cabinet by the fridge. Little green box. 'S called bronchial tea or something."
"Okay okay, don't speak medical to me." Patrick rolls his eyes and disappears in the kitchen once again.
For few more minutes, you're allowed some rest in the silence (aside from Patrick's heavy footsteps and the sound of the kettle running), and you almost manage to fall asleep. That tired you are. Unfortunately, the bed dips before you could wander into the world of dreams and a tender touch on your forehead.
"Fuck, you're burning up Y/N." Patrick stammers, setting the full cup of steaming tea on your bedside table. Some of it pours onto his fingers but he's not concerned about that. His main focus on you, your well being. "What do I do?"
He's right, your skin's definitely a bit more warmer than usual. A bit too much, actually. And Patrick doesn't like that. He doesn't like that he's so unsure and incompetent that he can't even take care of his own sick girlfriend. What if it's more than just a cold? What if you are actually slowly dying but he's too daft to notice that? He doesn't want you to die because of him.
"Just... Gimme the thermometer." Patrick obliges, helping you stick the thingy into your armpit where it remains for a few minutes, the quicksilver scale running up as it takes your temperature. Slightly above 38 degrees Celsius. "Not that bad."
"Not that bad?" Patrick basically scolds you, once again pressing a palm to your forehead, his palm too big that it covers your eyes too.
You smile tiredly, slowly grabbing Patrick hand and placing it on your cheek instead, nuzzling into the softness of it. Oh, you could fall asleep in his gentle hold, you could fall asleep even in the middle of an apocalypse if Patrick was there, holding you in his arms. "I'll just sweat it out, Pat. 'M gonna be okay."
"Sweat it out? You think that's gonna work?"
"Yes, baby, it'll work."
So he springs up once more, almost running to your wardrobe and pulling out various clothing articles. It's like an avalanche when Patrick pulls a woollen knit sweater over your head and two pairs of warm socks on your feet. In the thoughtful mother manner, he smooths your blanket over your aching body, tucking you in and ensuring there isn't a single a single gap that would allow anything even remotely cold to caress your skin.
"Okay, okay, all nice and snug." Patrick stands straight, dusting off his hands. There is a proud little smile on his freckled face. "And I... I can clean up the place a bit, hm?"
Solicitude is practically flowing through his veins as he wants to lift all of the possible worries off of your mind. It's the least he can do to make you feel better, to repay everything that you have ever done for him. You are the sun of his cloudy days, the flower in his field of rotten plants. There isn't a single thing this man wouldn't do for you.
"How about you stay here with me?" you offer, a soft, sheepish smile on your face.
He's by your side in the blink of an eye, an arm around your shoulder, tucking your body against his side and smoothing down the blanket over your body once again. He's like a heater too, only that it's not caused by fever as well. It's the natural warmth he emanates, the walking image of family comfort. "All good?"
"Even better." the delight in your weary voice is evident and the smile on your face full of appreciation. "Can you hand me the tea, please?"
"Sure, sure." Patrick helps you take a sip before setting the cup back on the bedside table. Again, his arms are tight around you, urging your head gently against his chest. "Anything else you need, baby? Another pair of socks? Gummy bears? Or I could-"
"Just stay here, be comfy and hold me." you silence him with a gentle collapse of your body onto his, face snuggling into the crook of his neck where his skin is the warmest.
On an instant, Patrick's muscles relax and he envelops you with gentle care, arms tightly wrapped around your slim figure. His fingers run through your hair gently, tucking back the strands that fell from your ponytail as a result of your constant squirming and altering of positions. "You sure you're okay?"
"Yes."
"Okay. Good."
"Good."
It's safe to say, that during this afternoon, you sweat out more than you thought you ever could, heat passing through your body as you're locked in your boyfriend's iron hold. He kisses your forehead every three seconds and aids you to sip on your tea, all while ensuring you remain nice and snug. Finally, Patrick gets to repay you all your gentle care and every tiny act of service directed at his person.
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