#i'm so fucking tired of bots following me

[cafemiau]

who's that pokemon? ~ you guessed it: Margot! lol

drew this one on stream yesterday, you can catch me live at twitch/mandyoquinhaaa 💖

[eldrichthingy]

The fucking amount of bots that follow me each day is fucking insane- 😭😭 WHEN WILL IT END. Each time I log in there's 20 MORE!! God!!

[travelersspark]

IM BACK! 🌟

Literally when on break since I've been busy with college and work😅. Now I can get back into the swing of things ! Since I'm here , might as well make a new headcanons post ~♡

𝑷𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝑻𝑳𝑲 .ᐟ 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒆𝒂𝒎 𝒎𝒆𝒆𝒕𝒔 𝑮𝑵.ᐟ𝑯𝒖𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓 𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒄𝒂𝒏𝒐𝒏𝒔

𝑶𝒑𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒖𝒔

First off. Cayde had a meeting with you at your local job. You and Cayde were close since he practically raised you along with Tessa . You were running late and Cayde was inside Optimus. Optimus had heard about you but never thought much about it.

He'd ask about you to Cayde and Cayde talked fondly of you so Optimus could sort of trust you. So could Cayde. Hence why he was gonna finally explain to you whats been going on for the past year.

Of course you are insanely confused when you get in the truck and Cayde starts being cryptic saying. “ Y/N. You know you can trust me right ? I would always tell you if somethings up.. ” -Cayde

You are dumbfounded at first while the silent drive fills the cabin with awkwardness. Then it hit you. “ Have you been looking for girls on tinder Cayde?! God I swear - ” - Y/N.

Facepalm from Cayde. Optimus almost laughed in his alt form but Cayde coughs before having to disprove your idiotic suspicion. He basically rushes an explanation of the autobots and decepticons and everything that has happened for the past year since you haven't really seen him.

Annnnnnnnndddd. Your not buying it. After the drive he tries explaining more but you brush it off basically just tired from work and chalking up his excuses to him being tired and or drunk.

Well.. until you see a group of vehicles strolling around and stopping with their headlights nearly blinding you (Kind of like the introduction the team from TF1) and with some loud noises and rumbling. You see them. Giant robots standing among you.

You Fucking FREAK. Definitely bout to be ready to throw some shit. Like WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK CAYDE ! Cayde has to mostly calm you down as well as Optimus surprisingly trying as well explaining that they would never hurt you.

After a couple of minutes of losing your shit. Optimus introduced himself explain his motives and his following. Your still apprehensive but sort of star struck. Ootimus's voice and tone was totally different than his remorseful and sort of stern tone. It even surprised Cayde.

Optimus certainly finds you intriguing due to the stories Cayde told him Since you now know of thier existence they have to basically become your body guards in a sense. You don't mind it but you still have your worries. Mostly about the part with the decepticons.

He reassures that he would do anything to try and keep you and the other humans safe.

A couple of banter from the crew but with one Stern glance of Optimus they shut it.

You two might have a quite interesting partnership - in a good way.

𝑩𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒍𝒆𝒃𝒆𝒆

oh. This mute bot is EXCITED to meet you ! He was the first one to transform and show himself to you after optimus.

Kind of flustered and worried when you lost your cool about seeing them. But after he calms his excitement and lets his leader explain himself.

He flashes his sick moves which makes you smile and laugh a bit. He gladly would do it again to make you smile.

Bee is one of the first bots you considerably found yourself talking to.

When you found out he couldn't speak like the others and communicated through a radio, you though he was quite a special bot.

He's like you in a way. You to pair together so well. Bee thinks of you like his old partner Sam.

Oh. He can get protective of you. Mainly when Crosshairs or Hot Rod get a bit flirtatious or silly around you.

Casually offers a drive after a few hours of meeting which you don't really refuse. You had to admit. He was a dream ride of yours.

Its love at first sight in his eyes. He already finds himself crushing on you from day one. And he hopes that you stick around with him.

𝑪𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒔𝒉𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒔

God another Squishy thing?! Let's just say he wasn't amused.

Well until you basically cursed the hell out of Cayde. Now he's impressed

Now he's made it his mission to figure out what makes you tic.

Weirdly he can he either considerate or just a complete jerk. But a loveable one at that.

He finds himself always trying to be flirtatious with you. But when you do it back he gets completely flustered and curses you out (his love language according to drift)

Fights about the miniscule things with you. Like if you eat in his alt form and there's a crumb he's gonna scold you.

Never saw himself being friends with a human but he would definitely enjoy his company with you.

First meeting him he is pretty serious about not wanting you around a bit but it shifts to wanting to hang with you more.

You two are FUCKIN GREMLINS TOGETHER. yall annoy the hell out of optimus and cade at times. God you two are a mess

Starts out as not being protective of you to being ULTRA protective. Mans always worried about you but tries to play it off.

𝑯𝒐𝒕 𝑹𝒐𝒅

Omg him and Bumblebee fell HARD for you when Cade introduced you to the crew. Literally he couldn't stop gawking at you.

Already trying to one up everyone else with his flirtatious and suave energy.

Placed a bet with bee to see if you'd like him more.

First to offer you rides from work, school or whatever. (He figured you showing up in his alt form would make you popular or cool. And he wasn't wrong either.)

Immediately asks Optimus to assign him as your guardian. Let me tell you, he is smitten by you and in the best way possible.

Says small pet names in french

Arrogant little bastard. Can't take any hints when you need space.

Overall hes just wanting time with you but doesn't exactly understand the idea of patience is a virtue.

𝑯𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅

Another human huh. Cool, hope they useful type energy.

Hes pretty chill about it to be honest. Definitely hesitant at the idea but understand where Cade is coming from.

Would personally introduce himself to you if you find him a bit intimidated. Secretly he's a big softie and jokes terrible behind closed doors.

Once he finds out you are just as handy as Cade is hes all over you. Don't expect him.to leave you alone with random weapon scraps and ideas he has in his head.

Probably would take you out to test some grenades with him or something.

Pretty protective on first meet. Mostly since he knows he can keep you safe with his experience and skills in war.

If you don't like the sight of anything remotely similar to cigars and smoke. He would actually stop puffing his bullet in front of you out of respect.

Doesn't care much about your habits as long as you don't get your ass in trouble that is.

Not the type to drive you around since he's a big ass military vehicle and that would definitely cause alot of suspicions.

𝑫𝒓𝒊𝒇𝒕

Not bothered but skeptical of your arrival. Let's just say he isn't too fond of the idea of another human around

Probably would discuss his concerns to cade and optimus about the risks but would be told that it was mostly for the best.

He gives up and pretends you just another one of the bots.

Pretty distant at first since he's still weary of you.

But if you compliment him during training of something and use the right terminology of the kata forms and martial arts he will definitely open up to you.

He appreciates someone who can understand his dedication. As well as someone educated in the sacred arts of Japanese and Chinese traditions.

Offers meditation lessons after some time if you are willing to do so.

Silent but deadly type of protective.

Has fought with crosshairs one time.when he was picking on you.

Very tsundere at first but overall he knows you are a good person and wouldn't mind getting to learn more about you

[gavisuntiedboot]

Level 8000 (Gavi x Reader)

28 day writing prompt challenge - prompts are here

Day 6: Meeting for the first time

"Alright I'm going to get onto an online server. No one try to reach me for the next several hours."

Your roommates laughed at the warning as you slipped your headset on. You adjusted the ears, bringing the mic over your mouth, and settled back into the couch. Your hoodie and sweats swamped your form, providing maximum comfort for your gaming session. Were you a fantastic gamer? No. But had you fixated on two or three games for long enough to get good at specifically those games? Yes, yes you did. One of those games was FIFA. You had played all the events throughout the World Cup, in between the early morning matches, and late at night when your 7pm Redbull kept you up until the early hours.

This binge playing over your winter break, as well as the game events, lead to you having a crazy stacked team. You had a super high Neymar as your front man, meaning that as long as you got the ball in the last 1/3 of the field, you were almost guaranteed to score. When all your real life friends had grown tired of you winning 7-0, you turned to PS online. People on the internet were ruthless. You played against stacked teams, losing your first dozen matches. But as you practiced and upgraded your players (as well as googling some good team formations), you started to win. Your win-loss ratio improved immensely with the addition of one piece of equipment: headphones with a mic. You started to join the voice chat, and the sound of a woman sent these poor gamer boys into a frenzy, allowing you to score two goals before they could recover.

Now it was your escape. You loved the power of overwhelming men just by saying "good luck", and the profanities that followed when you won. Tonight was no different. You had already beaten four different whiny men, and had tied a game with another girl on the voice chat, who practically squealed with delight when she heard the sound of your voice. Now it was time for match number 6 of the night, and you were sufficiently warmed up, ready to destroy.

[Opponent] - 6avira30

You smiled, thinking to yourself 'Awe, a Gavi fanboy. I wonder if he has him in midfield." The audio connected, and you heard a couple different male voices yell at each other in Spanish.

"Hello?" You said softly into the mic. Couldn't have them think you were anything other than a soft uwu girl using her boyfriend's account. The voices stopped suddenly, with a long pause before the reply: "Are you a girl?" You laughed at the question. It was not the first time you had gotten it, but the utter confusion in the boy's voice caught you off guard. "Yeah, I am. Hurry up and lock in your team so we can start the match." "Ay, be patient. My great strategic mind needs time to work."

You groaned into the mic. These "strategists" often were the most annoying people to play with, and often the one calling you a cheater or a bot or saying that your "man" was playing while you were on the mic. You locked in the same team you always used, and waited for the great mastermind to lock in his squad. The match began a minute later, and you were not surprised to see it was mostly Barca players, old and new.

"Wow a Xavi-Iniesta midfield. It's been a minute since I've seen that." You said, trying to get the ball across the center line.

"They're the best duo in the world. Everyone should have them in the middle." The boy replied, harshly attacking all your midfielders. It had been a while since you encountered someone who played this aggressively, but it was interesting enough to get you to sit up straight.

"Really? Given your tag, I thought you would have Pedri and Gavi in the middle."

The boy got quiet at this, the statement clearly catching him off guard. It was the lapse in focus that you needed, getting the ball to your super-charged Neymar, and slamming a goal in from outside the box.

"What the actual fuck was that?" A yell came in from the other side. You laughed freely now. This was a fun match. You were being challenged in the middle of the field, really having your defense tested. The boy kept you entertained online, asking all the typical questions about how you got so good. The match ended 3-1 to you, and you were about to say goodbye when a notification popped up on your screen.

[6avira30] - Rematch Requested

"You want to play against me again? One loss wasn't enough?"

"I'm not going to lose again. I just have to recalibrate the squad."

You continued playing against the same opponent for 7 or 8 matches in a row, the conversation moving from the game to your lives.

"So you've never been to a football match in person? How is that possible? You live in Barcelona!"

"I'm a university student who is struggling to pay my rent. I don't have the time or money to buy tickets. Well, at least the tickets that I want."

"Well, what tickets do you want?"

"I want the ones that are right up on the field, so at the end of the game I can ask Lewy for his shirt at the end?"

"Lewandowski? Not one of the younger players?"

"Nah, everyone is always yelling for Gavi's shirt. And while it would be nice to see Gavi or Pedri shirtless, I feel like if I was ever lucky enough to get one of their shirts, my life would be in danger. So I would rather get a shift from DILF Lewy."

A loud laugh came in through your headphones. The boy yelled at his friend in the room, "She just called Robert a DILF."

At the end of the match (a 2-1 win for you), it was time to log off. You informed your online partner, bidding him a good night.

"Wait wait, before you get off, could you send your number in the chat? It's fine if not but I'd really like to talk to you again."

"My number? Why not just my Instagram?"

"I... Can't really follow you on Instagram. It's kind of complicated."

You sent him your number and logged off, going to bed with a stupid smile on your face. A boy had asked for your number. Could he be a weirdo in his mom's basement? Absolutely. But you could find that out later.

You woke up to a text that read: Hope you slept well - Lindo from PS Live. The stupid smile stuck to your face all day. For the next two weeks, you texted this boy almost every waking moment. You could not get enough of him, despite the fact that you couldn't get him to tell you his name.

[PS Live Boy]: Want to have coffee with me tomorrow?

The text set the butterflies in your stomach free, the fluttering feeling spreading to every cell in your body. You has said yes embarrassingly fast. He texted you the location: a pretty upscale coffee shop in the shopping district. Like 17 euro black coffee upscale. You now jumped up and down like a giddy school girl - PS Live boy had money.

You walked into the place, the hostess looking over your skirt and sweater with a sickly sweet smile, asking who you were supposed to be there with. PS Live boy had left the table under your name as to maintain his shroud of mystery. You sat at the table, reapplying your lip gloss and checking your hair in the camera of your phone.

[PS Live boy]: you can't freak out when you see me

[PS Live boy]: Because then I would have to leave and block your number

[PS Live boy]: and file a restraining order. and i dont want to do that

You let out a nervous breath, smiling at your screen. Usually when men said not to freak out, it was because they were ugly. The hostess that didn’t like you walked over to the table again, closely followed by someone in a hoodie, hood pulled up to cover their face. She pulled out a chair, and your PS Live boy sat in front of you. He thanked the hostess, before turning back you you and pulling his hood off.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

Gavi looked at you with a cheeky smile playing on his lips. You were overwhelmed. Pablo mf Gavi had met you on PS live and liked you, asked for you number, and was now here on a date with you.

“Three weeks of being mysterious was worth the look on your face.”

“As Spain’s youngest player on the national team, how are you so shit at FIFA?”

“Okay okay okay, let’s go back to you being surprised and not talk about me getting my ass kicked 8 times in a row. Pedri still makes fun of me?”

“Dang Pedri was there? I should’ve asked for his number instead.”

“You have me leveled up to like 8000 in FIFA. I know you want to be here with me.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: this was supposed to be done last night but I fell asleep lol. I love the idea of Gavi being kinda cheeky and self confident. Most talented young boys are (because society inflates their egos). Anyways, see y’all later tonight w day 7!!

[aliceattheart]

Vox with a new an uprising tech demon threatening to take his spot that turns into a hate fuck situation with like an enemies to lovers troupe (also I figured out how to request yayyy)

You're making me short circuit

18+

When clicking the read more you consent that you are 18 I guess. I never followed this when I was younger 🤭 but for real this is adult content so viewer discretion advised ᕙ⁠(⁠＠⁠°⁠▽⁠°⁠＠⁠)⁠ᕗ

Also drak themes(You have been warned)

Vox x AFAB Reader

Heyyy y'all Alice here

I thought of the perfect idea for this I hope you enjoy. I'm a bit new to writing smut 😼

You weren't shocked after your unfashionable death did you find yourself spiraling straight down to hell. After countless amounts of murdering of the masses. You're crimes never caught up to you until you died of liver failure due to your obsessive drinking problem.

Your interesting new body that also accompanied you was strange. Your body has a luscious glow from the weird skin like sheet metal. With a small monitor on your wrist that showed you your vitals.

Having no foundation and a slight craft of making something out of nothing. You got yourself a business making Android assistance bots. Who needs Demons and Sinners when you have ready made bots willing to do almost anything. You're still working on somethings but none the less from perfection.

You were a spit fire that's for sure. Finding your place fairly easy. Being the Mastermind behind an Electric business in your recent past. You've learned a few dirty tricks at getting what you want.

Having frequent battles to aquire a turf to call your own. Even if I meant trying to brutally murder other low life's. Who cares? You're in hell and you only live once. Well twice in every Sinners case.

But as of late some asshole of a Poor functioning monitor company wanted to get in your way. He was "Big time" but all of his accomplishments were mediocre at best. Your Android assistance bots gravely out weighted his TV Empire beyond comparison. And he was "friends" with that loser Valentino. Good golly do you hate him and his disgusting business.

He once wanting to combine your business with his. Wanting you to work under him. He honestly thought he was smart. You're not that dumb, he wants the publicity of you joining. You have been the talk of the whole realm. It was truly an honor to the single flower that stuck out. Quite the eye catcher.

Which honestly you would have if he'd ask nicer than just say, "Join my fucking Empire and lavish in all it's charm."

You gently got up from your sit and said this on your way out. "As if I'd join the Three Musketeer and work under your pitiful display of power." Walking out of the door slamming it.

He came up with a brilliant idea. "I'm tired of playing nice with that bitch." Vox took to anger before rationally thinking. He was proud of himself when telling his subordinates to put a tracking device in your car. And it surely didn't take long for him to locate you.

You weren't one to mess around with. Having a zero tolerance for idioc and rambunctious losers who would waste your time. And unfortunately for Vox he fit both categories.

Stepping out of the car. The service bot held your hand to help you out. Closing the door behind you. Without a chance to catch view of the bustling only to see Vox. "What do you want from me? I thought I made it clear that I wanted no part in that bogus deal." Snapping at him as he followed this long strides behind you. "Don't be like that, can't you just see how much more you'll gain working under me? You can't be so stupid to think I won't use force did you?" "Oh no! Whatever shall I do? You know I'm not helpless, correct?" He scoffed at you. Unfortunately for him he recently learned of your alliance with Alastor.

Picking up your pace as you walked into the booming establishment. Hoping to loosen up after your truly eventful week. Quickly finding yourself to the bar. Only to have that insufferable TV sit right next to you.

"What would you like Y/L?" "Take the strongest things you have and mix them together. I want the strongest hangover tomorrow." "Give me what's she's having."

After a few drinks you both shared a unspoken mood. You couldn't quite put your finger on it but the desire you felt at the moment for the very distasteful yet Handsome TV. Perhaps it was the lights, or maybe the music but most definitely the drinks. Checking your arm monitor. [Hammered] That's all you needed to know to put your almost finished drink down.

After putting the money on the table with a nice tip, you turned and started up another conversation with Vox. "Why are you still here? I've already said no to the deal, get it through that think screen of yours."

"Someone is feeling that Martini. I just thought that you might want some company. I've seen the way you've been staring at me all night." "Hop off your high horse. Though you aren't mistaken. Just be warned that I don't play sweetly." "Don't worry sweetheart. I like to play rough."

After that short but sweet conversation you can't even remember how you ended up in your room. But that's a problem for tomorrow.

Imagine

Your elaborate outfit was long gone, making conversation with the carpet. You knew Vox wasn't a kind man but some decency wouldn't hurt. He littered your skin with sharp nips.

His slick fingers found it's way to your chest. "Remember what you said, what happened to all that bite?" Vox smirked down at you while he pinched at your oh so sensitive nipples. "Oh shut up. You should be greatful that I'm allowing you the pleasure of pleasing me tonight. Many souls have fought for this pleasure." Your legs clamped around his waist, successful flipping both of you over. "But since you asked so nicely, I'll show you some bite "

You made quick work of his tattered clothes. Throwing the button up and pants on the floor to join the conversation with yours. You decided to leave his undergarments on. You being in no rush. You had nothing to do in the morning.

Slowly you started to grind your hips down to meet his. You were quick to make your hands busy with raking them up and down his chest. Feeling naughty you started to traced his cute nipples. He started to look slightly displeased.

"Oh what's wrong cupcake? Is this too much for you already?" He scoffed at you while grinding his hip up to yours. "It's not that it's too much, I've never had someone--Ah !" He cut himself off with a airy moan. You don't spare him any glances as you started to toy with his nipples.

You gave him the same rough treatment he gave you. Pulling and twisting them. Tonight shall be an interesting night. Was all you could think about. While your hands were busy you started to lean down and bite at his shoulders. Leaving deep bite marks in it's wake. Slowly dragging your tongue around the craters. Trailing your tongue to meet your hands. Latching onto his left nipple and gently sucking.

You could tell that Vox was getting impatient with the lack of friction between his legs. Looking him in his eyes he had a deep flush on his monitor. He was cute.

Suddenly out of nowhere he decided that he wanted to take charge again. Mostly likely because he felt humiliated that he was being dominated by you. "I've had enough play time. Let's get the real party started." He snatched your beautiful decorated panties off without a second thought. He were quick to follow.

"Like I've said, I'm not gonna go easy on you." Flashing his pearly sharp teeth at you again. Precisely lining himself up with you soaking wet entrance. Just the tip felt heavy and he had even inserted yet. What have you've gotten yourself into. Too late to back out now.

He slammed his throbbing hard dick into you. All you could do was hold your mouth open as all the air rushed out of you. The sting of the stretch was orgasmic. Your legs pulled him in closer, not wanted to let him go.

His pace was slightly unbearable. The jack ass didn't even give you a change to catch your breath. He was thrusting in so hard and deep. It was the deepest someone has gotten. He grabbed your legs and pulled them down to your chest. "Waait! Slow DOwn!" "What ah happened to you don't play nice? So take what I givve you." He was groaning as he picked his pace up.

You didn't know about him but you were about to cum. He was just being so rough. It was a major turn on for you. "I'm... I'm CUMMING!" The orgasm shook through you. Vox on the other hand did not slow down for a second. He worked you through your first orgasm into your second. It was becoming too much, your legs started to shake. Vox finally emptied himself into your warm cavern. "Ahhh, that was great. But don't think that we're finished yet."

He pulled out. And turned you over flat on your stomach. Pulling your hips up towards his. He reinserted himself into you with on strong thrust. He picked back up his brutal pace again. Your face went straight into the pillows to hide your loud moans. As he slammed his hips into the back of your ass it stung oh so good. Vox pulled at your scalp and yanked your head back. "Don't go quiet on me now. I wanna he your screams." And boy did you not let him down. "AhhaaA, I'm CUMMING AGAIN!"

You couldn't take anymore, he was being so mean. You looked at your arm monitor it said [Error]!? What does that mean? Vox slid his fingers down to meet your painfully throbbing clit and started to play with it. "You like that don't you?" He said proud of himself for successful.aking you cum three times non-stop. Your fourth orgasm was coming in fast. "Give me one more." "I CAN'T!" "YOU CAN." Your vitals started to say"Short circuit!" Along with "ERROR"

Before you knew it you blacked out for a few seconds. When you came to you realized between your legs was a gushing stream of liquid. You were beyond embarrassed. Vox grunted on last time as he slowed his pace down. Having reaching his limit. With you milking his cock just right. His orgasm was trying blissful.

"God we should do this more often." He smiled at your oh so tired body. "Maybe another time when I'm under the influence of a sharp Martini." You chuckled. The rest of your night was quite peaceful as you quickly feel asleep. Who would have thought Vox loves to cuddle.

[theoneofwhomisblue]

Maybe following 3,000 people isn't great

Because I fucking hate scrolling through this fucking site now

I'm not even joking, I fucking hate this shit

This site sucks ass

Also if this post has less than 10 notes in 3 hours I'm deleting it

I know this is completely my fault. I also don't give a fuck

I'm too tired to curate my page to be decent for me

I'm so fucking tired

This site sucks ass

Reddit sucks ass

Tumblr sucks ass

The Internet fucking sucks

Google is constantly bitching at me to pay for more space in my account cause I habitually download every Tumblr and reddit image resulting in 13 gigabytes of bullshit

I fucking hate this

Anyway

I'll find better stuff to post tomorrow

Or not

I don't know

I'm so fucking tired

Kill myself

What the fuck do I do with my time now? Is there another site or app worth my time?

Tumblr's ass, I'll still use it but it's dogshit

I'm too tired to even do reddit anymore

Twitter is fucking disgusting and gets worse by the day because of dipshit mcmusk

And that's all that comes to mind

YouTube is constant background noise, but the algorithm there is fucked up too

I hate every video thats recommended to me

I'm not doing fucking tiktok

I don't care about my standards anywhere else, but no fucking tiktok

What else is there now?

Oh yeah, I can't comment on webtoon because I accidentally said fuck in a comment, so all the fun community stuff there is gone now too

All the webtoons suck ass anyway

The only fucking app that hasn't disappointed me is cookie clicker

Been playing it for like 400 days

I make continual progress

I just check in every two days to pop the wrinklers

Then after a month or two on a run I check in after a week

Until my legacy points start to plateau, then I reset

And get all the upgrades I can afford

Buy 5 grandmas, then 90 more, then as many more as I can afford that'd a multiple of 100

I do the same on everything else

Except the fractile engines, which I buy as many as possible, no matter the multiple

And buy all the items

Then at that point I start the research facilities, then start one, and check back in 30 minutes until I've researched them all

Then I top off the fractile engines and leave for a day

Then check every day, popping the wrinklers until a week in, then every 2 days. Then after a few months once every week

Then I do it all again

And spend all the legacy points on the upgrades I can afford

It's rewarding you know

Consistent anyway

Unlike reddit and Tumblr and Twitter and YouTube and everything else, it doesn't fuck me over on the algorithm whatever the fuck

Reddits decent for the porn, that's all

You know, I used to use a lot of sites for porn

Dozens and dozens of sites bookmarked

Then at some point I started to only use r34 reddit nhentai, and occasionally the good ol hub

I didn't use to have accounts, I'd depend on my memory for different images and accounts and artists and comics and shit

Then I made accounts on r34 phub reddit e6 gelb nhentai and half a dozen others

And started saving things

It used to be a fun game to try to remember

Now it's gone

But I'm too tired to continue that anyway

Anyway, same shit everything else as with the porn at this point

No variety

Nothing fun

It's all annoying bullshit

With the Advent of machine learning chat bot whatever the fucks, there's a little bit new

But aside from that, it's just the same thing every day

I'm so fucking tired of living like this duxe

The fucking internet used to mean something

Now it's just the boring status quo bullshit

And I know that it's because of me

But still

It fucking sucks

I don't want to do this shit

And I spend like 10 hours a day on the Internet too

More than ever

But I'm not happy

Barely entertained

But it kills time

If I need information, porn, music, videos, whatever elze

Entertainment

I get it

But I'm not happy about it

It's shitty

I feel like shit

Like, my life outside the internet is decent. But the Internet consumes so much of it, and I don't even like it anymore

I don't know if there's a fix

Or if I should just stop being so online and shit

I'm too tired to do anything anyway

I don't know

I take pride in what I achieve for some reason

But as soon as I get the imaginary goal point, I don't give a shit

Over a year I got a shit ton of reddit karma on a new accoutn

A specific number, that I won't say to keep myself from seeming like I'm trying to brag

But once I got it, I no longer cared to comment or post

Over 2 or 3 months, I don't remember, whenever 196 shut down, I got a relative shit ton of followers

Again, a specific number, but I won't say

I'll keep that number secret, cause I can

But once I got this imaginary amount that I thought I'd never reach, I didn't care anymore

I still posted as much as I did before

But I got no joy out of it

I just post, wait a few hours, then check to see how many notes

If it's an amount equal to what I think is average for the amount of followers I have, I feel kinda good, then post again

But that's it

I don't scroll anymore, except occasionally on my followers profiles when I accidentally click on them while looking through my new notes

And I enjoy that

But other than those fleeting moments, and the small satisfaction I get from high note counts I don't care

I don't care for Tumblr or anything else on this shit

I don't know man, is this how other people do stuff on the Internet?

I don't think so, people always have strong emotions on the Internet

I emulate my internet behavior to match, which makes me think that maybe more people do the same as me

But I have no evidence

I don't know, I'm too fucking tired of this shit

I just got an apathy about the Internet at this point

Apps, sites, everything

I just don't care

But I'm always on it

It makes no sense

I should probably proofread this post as I go

This is just a stream of consciousness at this point

I won't check it as I go

Maybe I'll make this a thing

Just typing my unfiltered thoughts for like 30 minutes then posting

Depends on the notes I get

If the notes are bad I'll just delete it and forget about it

Who knows

I guess I keep trying to do that

I'll do something new on Tumblr like this

And think "oh, maybe this'll be a new thing I do" then it dies

At first it was my consistent posting of reddit shit for like a year ago

Then I stopped posting that consistently

Then it was random screenshots of mine

I even made a tag for that one

Then it died

I keep thinking of myself as someone important because of my follower count

Which doesn't make sense as it's not even a lot

But still

I don't know

My delusions of microcelebrity status are the only thing keeping me on this site/app at this point

If I didn't have that, and the fuel for the delusion that is notes I'd be gone

I did already fuck my recommended tab

And following tab

And tag tab

It's already all bullshit

I guess I can keep my narcissism about my status in this site because of the top post by notes tab on a blog

I just click into someones

And 9 times out of ten, they don't have top note counts even comparable to time

Which fuels the delusion

It's the same thing I'd do on reddit

"oh this person only has [x] karma, when they've been on reddit for 3 years. And I have triple that, and I've had this account for 6 months. I'm better"

Shit like this is what makes the internet garbage

I don't let it bleed into the theme of my posts and comments tho

I let it make me feel superior than everyone else

But if I made that obvious in any post it'd be for naught

For that reason I'm considering not posting this anymore

Whatever, this post is already super long rambling bullshit

If it gets good notes a single anecdote in it won't matter

And if it doesn't get good notes I'll delete it

Then there's no harm

I just thought of that reasoning now to keep doing this post

Cause I got sunk cost fallacy on this at this point

It was a vent thing at the start

Now it's just me trying to think mildly interesting shit to add

I guess I can use that other reasoning to post anything

If it goes bad, delete it, and no one would have saw it, and no one will, so I matters naught

And if it goes good, who gives a shit

Nothing I post would be bad, maybe cringe, maybe rambling bullshit, as this js

But not bad, so it'd be fine

I lost my train of thought

I think I was gonna say something else about what I'm posting, and how it would be fine

That's gone now

Poof, into the abyss that is lost thoughts

This does kill time tho

It's been like 40 minutes since I started this

This is basically what I do in my mind if I just let my mind run, uninterrupted

But here it's written down, with line breaks, and exact words rather than a mix of words and images and concepts

So it's more digestible

I suppose it's not completely true to say this is my pure train of thought, not just because of the exclusion of images and concepts

But also because I'm listening to music

Just enough to mild my mind so to speak

My mind is always going man, and if I don't have something to dampen it

Like music, or weird fidgety things I do with my hands (I don't know the word), or exact things to focus on, I think way too much

And spiral and shit in stress

But then my thoughts are too frantic and fast to write down before they disappear, so in a way this is as pure a log of thoughts as anything could be

You can tell the theme of how I sound now, vs at the beginning

If you don't want to scroll up you can just look at the tags

I typed them near the beginning

And haven't added to them

Nor deleted them

So you can just look slightly down to see the notes

It's not even the right topic anymore. It's still on reddit

And Tumblr and internet shit

Oh yeah, speaking of

I've just said my Tumblr scrolling is bad without specifying

But to specify now, it's like scrolling through Twitter

Weird serious discourses

Arguments

Peculiar topics

Shit like that

You know, not the Tumblr I had before

And if I don't like scrolling through Twitter, why would I be here? And that's the bind I'm in now

I only stick around anymore because of the notes, as I said

I'm back to using punctuation occasionally

Not too much, but at least some commas

No periods though, they seem too intense for a stream of consciousness thinf

Question marks too, but that's about all

Oh yeah, stuff I was talking about before

Webtoon

I shit talked webtoon

It's not too bad

I just fucking hate slice of life shit, dumb "funny" shit, and worst of all romance

I fucking hate romance webtoons

I can't stomach them

And webtoon is constantly shoving exactly those down your throat

And when my tolerance is low to begin with, and I enter webtoon, and it throws a fucking popup in my face for a dogshit new romance thing, I damn near snap my phone in half

But it's not too bad

I just read the fantasy/action/thriller/horror/drama (ones without romance shit) ones

But I can't navigate the canvas section decent at all

By design obviously, canvas doesn't make webtoon money, the originals do

But I'm too tired to work against them

So I only read originals

But at least they post regularly

I read around 70 webtoons now

Which is to say, I read the new episodes of them when they come out

With such a large selection, I have like 4 webtoons minimum updating every day at 7:00 pm

8:00 when there's time change

But 7:00 most of the timr

It notifies you at 7:30 but they update at 7:00

Except for the goblin one, which updates at like 7:20 for some reason

And the daily pass ones, those update at 8:00 for some reason

But they notify you directly at 8:00 for those if I remember correctly

Even still

I remember roughly which days are best

Tuesdays have the most, like 15 updated at once

And ones I really like too

Fridays have a handful, and the one daily pass that I read as they come out week by week

Saturdays have like 4 I really care about, then like 5 I think are mediocre, but they kill time so Saturdays are good

Mondays are ok, but that's about it

Wednesdays are kinda ass, but they're decent

Thursdays used to be amazing, but after like 3 I really care about went on hiatus, Thursdays don't matter anymore

But having like 60 (because 5-10 are on hiatus at a time) new episodes a week, divied up across the week pretty well

Is nice

Now, I did accidentally say fuck in a comment, because there was a guy shipping children and saying sexual stuff about it, then there was a reply on it from another guy defending it. So I got mad, and typed a paragraph saying why that was fucked up

But I said fuck

So I can't comment anymore

I don't know, webtoons ok tho

I was just pissed off earlier

What else was there

Oh yeah reddit

I've actually been temp banned from Reddit (like my entire account) twice for using up too much server space on bullshit

There's this thing where you type u/profanitycounter [self] and it tells you how many times youve said certain swears in like the past 500 comments

So, for a joke, twice I've copy pasted "cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum...", The max amount of times you can in one comment (a few thousand, I can't remember), then do that in a comment chain with myself for like 150 comments in a row

And it takes me several hours, but it's funnt

But it resulted in a temp ban for 2 days

Then like 4 months later, a temp ban for a week

Cause I used too much space, or bandwidth or whatever the fuck doing that

Also I got banned from r/Barry for saying the last season was ass

And I got banned from r/notinteresting for a reason I don't fucking know

But aside from that, my accounts clean

With a shit ton of karma too

Oh yeah, I use the same username (or a derivative of it) for every porn site account I make.

If you can find it out somehow I'll give you the passwords to the accounts

I doubt anyone could, it's a different username than I use for anything else

But there's hints

If anyone cares I'll even give you a few more hints directly in a DM if you ask

Though I will be vague as fuck

Been doing this for over an hour now

I wasn't paying enough attention to when I started

I'm pretty sure I heard someone say that Tumblr has no character cap

Let's hope so

I'm too tired to continue this shit

I guess this ends it

Let me know if y'all want more bullshit like this

I, personally, always like an unfiltered look at someone mind

But that's me personally

Maybe my mind is bland and uninteresting

Who knows

I'll stick with what I said at the beginning tho

Less than 10 notes in 3 hours and this post going bye bye

I got a headache from this shit

I thought way more than I usually do

Now that I'm more chill, I don't hate tumblr

I fucked it up for me

But y'all are good

Tumblr's good

[starliights-shining]

Party goer.

Pairing: Jazz x reader

Warnings: NSFW, fem word uses,

A/N: this is like 4400+ words and 8 pages in my docs, ive been working on it fro the past week or so. Its not proof read, i simply just dont proof read. I've been preoccupied with RE4s remake coming out soon, but i swear im not ignoring the TF request I have, it'll just take a long time for them to come out. :) anyways enjoy!

Parties, loud music, drinking, the mixing crowd of bots and people. You didn’t really care for them, but Jazz did. When you say a lot of parties, you mean a lot of parties. Ranging from weddings, funerals, battle victories, hell even political ones, Because if Jazz got an invite, he was going with you of course. This party was different. He got his invite from Prowl, but when Jazz brought the invite to you, it said in fancy italics “No Humans!”. 

“It says no human Jazz. I'm not going to some stupid party just to be denied entry or worse bullied.” 

“You won’t get bullied, you’ll be with me. For the last time (Y/N)” 

You were on the couch, You looked at the bot, a disappointed frown on his face plate. The invitation is gently in your grasp, its fancy English writing and other language translations. 

“I don’t know that Jazz, you want me to get all dressed up just to be denied entry or be sat outside the entire time?” 

You placed the invasion on the coffee table. Leaning back into the couch, you were upset. Your lover was basically asking you to get dressed and all just to be denied entry to a party, no, you will not be doing that. 

“You’re acting like I'm asking you to fight in a war, I’m not.” 

“You, Jazz, you're not understanding.” 

You're stuttering over your words, he was upsetting you. 

“I am understanding, if you don’t want to go just tell me the real reason. Is it prowl? Is there someone else you’re avoiding?” 

“I don’t want to be bullied at a party for being me, that's all Jazz.” 

“Cut the slag, (Y/N).” 

You were taken aback, why was he so upset with you. 

“You know what, yes Jazz. It’s You and Prowl” 

You were now standing up, he had finally gotten the same energy match. You were pissed. 

  “I dont want to go to a party, where I sit in a fucking corner by myself, and watch you and Prowl get fucking drunk. I don’t want to sit outside a fucking club or god fucking knows where, while you and your shit cop buddy go inside and get fucked up and hit on. Just go by yourself.” 

You walked out of the living room, hell you were tempted to go for a walk. Instead you walk straight to your room. Locking the door and just sitting on the edge of your bed. How the hell could he just yeah at you like, over not wanting to go to a party that says “No Human.”

You woke up to a knock on the door. Multiple knocking, getting up you opened the door to see Jazz, his smile not wearing as you gave him a tired look. 

“You wanna get ready, and like come with us?”

You stared into his visor, until the movement of Prowl behind him caught your attention. You sighed before motioning your head for him to enter and moved towards the bathroom. He closed the door behind himself, and followed you into the bathroom, leaning against the doorway. 

“Are you still mad at me?” 

His question felt stupid, of course you were still mad at him. He made you feel bad, how would he feel if you made him feel like shit for following directions. You took your clothes off and stepped into the shower. 

“No, just tired.” 

“Tired, tired of me?” 

He laughed, he was trying to lighten the mood, considering he could probably feel the heavy atmosphere. 

“I guess you could say something like that.”

“Alright well, I’ll be downstairs with Prowl, we’ll leave when you're ready.” 

You actually don't know why you're going, you had expressed very aggressively why you didn’t want to go. Yet, the moment Jazz asked you didn’t hesitate. He just had that effect on you, a simple command and you’d do it, but he doesn’t ever want to understand your side. The noise of Jazz laughing took you out of your thoughts, the cold nipping at your skin as you three stood in the que line to get in. You peeked around the bot in front of you to see the line, an arrangement of all all types of people, but not a single human. You straighten up, standing behind the two mechs, an uneasy feeling washed over you. You truly felt like you weren’t supposed to be here. You felt someone bump into you, turning around, you were met with an ugly look. 

“Sorry, I didn’t,” “I don’t care, just watch where you’re walking.” 

They had cut off your apology, completely blaming you for the encounter. The person had tried to step in front of you, assuming the line ended right after Jazz and Prowl. You stepped back in our original spot, looking up at the person and smiling. 

“Sorry, I was actually here before you.” 

Bring your hand up to point at the spot you were standing at, the same spot you’ve been at, right behind the two Cybertronians. Jazz turned around at the sound of your voice. Looking between you and the person. 

“Is there a problem?” 

He placed that ‘I’ll act nice, but am i really’ smile on his face plate. You watched as the person backed up, looking at you with an upset look before mumbling no. Jazz pulled you to stand in front of him. 

“Did something happen?” 

“No, he was just trying to cut in line. Probably because I was human.” 

You spoke, turning around and looking forward. This was the exact reason you didn’t want to come. You weren’t even inside yet and there was already someone trying to start something. All these other space people, some of them look like humans, You can’t tell the difference unless you ask them, and even then some won’t even admit they're human. 

By the time you remember what you were here for, Jaz had already gotten both you and Prowl into the party. 

Jazz bends down to your head level, before speaking. 

“See, we’re in. No need to worry.” 

You looked at him, why the fuck would he say that. He started walking towards an empty booth, sitting you inside. 

“Now, Prowl and I have some things to attend to. Stay here, if anyone asks, you're waiting for someone.” 

You nod, placing your hands in your lap. Before Jazz leaves he places a kiss on your forehead, causing you to look over at him, he smiles, snaps one of his servos before pointing a finger gun at you. You watched as he disappeared into the crowd, this is exactly how you thought it'd go. Being left in some strange club, while he goes off to go god fucking knows where. A waiter came up to your table asking if you wanted anything, considering you knew you’d be there for a long ass time. You ordered yourself something, anything to keep you occupied. The last thing you wanted was to think about your situation. 

The waiter brought the drink out and after a few sips you just ended up swirling the liquid around. The mix of human and cybertronian alcohol mixed into a light neon blue. Maybe this was just part of the every plan, drag you out to a party and have you sit alone. You can't seem to figure out what comes after that, some random person hits on you or the Prowl keeps you company until Jazz comes back. The simple thought of having company while sitting here just kept creeping into your mind. 

You were left with your own mind, something that can pull your moods up or down with just simple thinking, but considering you’ve been at this party for some time and no one seems to notice or care, it was time to just relax. You leaned back in the booth, your head resting on the stuffed leather as you closed your eyes. Pulling your drink close to you, but keeping your hand on it. You know closing your eyes in a foreign place isn’t the greatest thing to do, but who really cares, you didn’t want to come here anyways and hopefully Jazz or Prowl would return soon. 

You were just getting comfortable when you felt a knock on the table. Your eyes open to see the familiar blue visor. He smiled at you before sitting around from you, a drink in hand. 

“Whatcha doin?” 

His tone was playful, it seems like his drink was really getting to him. 

“Sitting here,” 

You reply as you close your eyes again. 

“I don't know, it seems like you were sleeping.”

“I was just resting my eyes.”

You lifted your hand up moving it around in front of your face in a shade gesture. 

“That's bad because anyone could slip something into your drink.” 

You shrugged, you knew he was right but you really didn’t want to admit he was, you were still upset at him. So instead you acted like you didn’t care. 

“And then they’d kidnap you, my beautiful girlfriend.” 

He was sweet talking you. He knew you were still upset at him and the thought of that simple just couldn’t exist within him. You didn’t respond, if he knew the true reason he’d recommend leaving, and you really like the drink you have and you're super comfortable. 

“Now, tell me, why are your eyes closed? Is it the lights? Thinking about getting me in bed already?” 

God now he was asking questions and his questions were getting out of hand, so you acted like you couldn't hear him over the loud music and chatter. You finally decided that keeping your eyes closed would mean no looking at Jazz, so you lifted your head. Making eye contact with his visor while pulling your cup up to your lips. 

“Is there something I can help you with?” 

You just wanted to know what he wanted, disturbing your peace in your small corner booth. He looked taken aback, he placed his free hand on his chassis and let out a dramatic gasp.

“I just wanted to see what my beautiful girlfriend was doin, am I not allowed to be with you.” 

You rolled your eyes, is this really how he was trying to get on your good side? 

“And now you’ve seen, Don’t you have things to attend to, like,”

You paused looking around the crowded room, your eyes scanning for anything that looked of interest or be of interest to Jazz. You saw multiple people dancing, a group of girls getting drunk and being hit on by some space robot, the DJ trying to keep up with everyone's requests, the bartender yelling at someone for hitting on her, and then your eyes landed on Prowl. The cop sat with a lady at the bar, that was your goat out, Jazz would see Prowl finally getting some and then it’d be enough to convince him to either wingman for him or leave with you. You lifted your hand with your cup in it, your index finger pointing towards the bot.

“Like Prowl, He seems to have found himself a lady.” 

Jazz whips his helm around, searching the bar for the bot.

“I don’t believe it.”

He trailed off as he turned back to you. Now was the time he’s supposed to get up and go talk to them, get her to fall in love with his close friend, but for some reason, he doesn’t. He leans back into his spot in the booth, taking a sip of the drink he harbored. A sly smile on his face as he watches your face. 

“Was that your plan to get rid of me?”  

You sighed, downing the last bit of your drink. You shifted your position in the booth, Placing your arms on the table as you leaned in. He leans in himself, that same smile on his face. Your eyes trail from his visor to his lips and then down his chassis and finally to his servos. Your eyes flicking back up to his visor and then back to his drink.  Learning a tad bit more and smiling. 

“Yeah, kinda hoped it would work, maybe I could get you to leave me the fuck alone.” 

You said his smile fading as he started to move back to his original position, your hands swiftly grab his cup, It being slightly larger than yours, as you bring it up to your lips, taking in the liquid. You thought it tasted ten times better then whatever the fuck you hand before.

“You little,” 

he was cut off as you got up from the booth, placing the cup back on the table. Since Jazz wasn’t going to wingman for Prowl, you thought you’d do it. Walking towards the bot, you felt a pair of metal arms wrap around you . 

“Where do you think you're going little miss.” 

Jazz’s voice being heard a little too clearly in your ear, you giggled, leaning back into him. You moved to grab his arms.

“I wanna go tell Prowl that we’re leaving,” 

You lied, the original plan being thrown out the window the moment Jazz grabbed you, the same thought about how you’d do anything for him. 

He hummed his response letting god of you and settling for just holding your hand as you dragged him towards the bot. As you got closer until you got the attention of Prowl, You put on your brightest smile and gave a big wave.

“Prowl,” 

You drew out his name, His optics met your eyes. 

“Jazz and I are going home, I thought I’d tell you just in case you were to leave later and couldn’t find us.” 

He nodded, after getting confirmation you looked towards the lady, smiling before turning back to Prowl and waving. You turned around and started to leave. Walking through the crowd of people and to the door, you could feel the occasional squeeze from his servos. 

The feeling of the cold night breeze hit your face hard, shivering as Jazz moved to stand next to you while letting go of your hand. Fresh air never felt better, a deep breath coming from you, eyes closed relaxed. It seemed like the headache you had while in the building disappeared the moment you stepped outside. The noises of cars and other city noises take over your ears. 

“Soo, what do you wanna do now,” 

He paused, you opened your eyes to look over at him and smiled. 

“I know you didn't actually want to go home, come on, you look too good to just go home.” 

He moved his servos in a gesturing motion towards your outfit, yeah you did like your fit and did think it was kinda too early to go home, but you didn’t need him to know that. 

“We could just go for a walk, see what we see.” 

You suggested, bringing your hands up to the sides of your arms, the chill of the air seeping to your bones. You started in a direction, the bot following behind you. You could hear the sound of whirling from his intake. 

“Got anywhere special you wanna go?” 

He moved up to walk next to you, a smile on his face plate as he analyzed your reaction. The city was large, and you could practically go anywhere you wanted. So you thought, trying to come up with something cool other than just going home. Cool, something cool for Jazz to enjoy. He could just enjoy your company, but the idea of a walk didn’t really seem to interest him whatsoever. 

“It's okay if you don't have anything to do. I already dragged you to that party,” 

He paused, he was thinking, your eyes met with his visor. Your reflection looking back at you in the shiny blue material. At that moment, you thought you could look at yourself for the rest of your life through that visor, a visor brighter than the blue sky. You didn’t practically like looking at yourself, but this time, you thought you could do it for hours on end. Your eyes trail down to his lips for a split second before looking back at his visor. The cold air seemed to hit your body differently at that moment, almost lighting a fire of lust within you. 

“Hello, (Y/N)? Y’a there!” 

Jazz moved his servo in front of your face, breaking you from your trance. Your hands came up to your mouth in a cupping motion as you blew hot air into them, a desperate attempt to warm up. You could just take one and tell him you’d like to go home, but who knows what’d go down if you both went home with the amount of alcohol in your systems. Maybe that’s what made going home so exciting, the thought of desire and being under the bot you so desperately love. 

“I’d like to go home, it’s getting colder and I didn’t dress for it.” 

You stated, the idea to cover the real reason for going home with freezing being the only thing keeping you going. 

You both arrive at your house, the bot standing behind you while you fiddled with your keys to get the door unlocked. You opened the door to be met with the warmth of your home and its familiar comforting smell. The sigh coming from you is a signal of home. You had walked further into your home, forgetting about the bot who was behind you. You just wanted out of your clothes, the redistricting fabric from the dress and the heels you wore that was making it feel like you were walking on pins and needles. 

When Jazz looked up from closing the door you were gone, the faint noise of your heels going up the carpeted stairs . 

“Slow down, pretty girl.” 

He called out, as he started following you. It didn’t take long for him to catch up, walking into your bedroom to see you standing next to the bed, one hand placed on the mattress and slightly bent over as your other hand reached for your heel that was kicked up. He leaned against the door frame watching you, arms crossed over his chassis. 

Once you got your heels off you dug your feet into the carpet, the feeling getting you to sigh in relief, no more heels. Both of your hands were now planted on the bed and your head hanging down, all you needed was to get your dress off and then get a warm bath and your night would be complete. Complete? I’d be complete if you could get Jazz on top of you. Your thoughts were cut short when you felt a pair of servos on your waist, his digits playing with the fabric of your dress. 

“You look too good in this dress, just for it to go to waste. Don't you think so?”

You could feel him pulling you into him, your back meeting his chassis as his helm rested on your shoulder. You’d be lying if you didn’t agree with him, you looked too damn good in your dress just to give it up in a matter of seconds. His servo was traveling downwards, stopping at the hem of the dress. He took a deep breath in, his servos playing with the end of your dress. 

“I’ve thought about you in this dress since we left.” 

His servo moved to your inner thigh, and moved upwards towards your panties. A whimper left your mouth, his digits started to move from your clit to your entrance, he wasn't even in your panties yet. 

“Yet, I still don't know how i want to fuck you.” 

The dirty talk was getting to you, fueling the fire of desire and want within you, and with how close to your pussy he was, it was getting hard to stay patient. HIs digits moved the fabric of your panties aside, his digits circling your clit and occasionally going down to circle your entrance. A moan leaving your mouth, he was picking speed up and then slowing down in a steady pattern. If he kept this up, you’d be a moaning mess by the end of the night. 

“That feel good, enjoying yourself baby?” 

He spoke in a mocking tone. Of course it felt good, but you weren’t going to tell him that. He finally fully put his digits in you, rubbing against your walls before deciding to go in a scissoring motion. There was no more holding back, your head leaned back against his shoulder plating, and you did not stop moaning. 

“Yeah,” 

He paused, taking a moment to fully enjoy the sounds you were making, and change his pattern fingering. 

“I’d say you're enjoying it a little too much, it's gettin’ a little too tight. Getting close aren't ya.”  

All you could do in that moment was nod and whine out his name. The knot in your stomach is getting tighter and tighter by the second. 

“Yeah, let's speed this up.” 

His servo on your waist goes to circle your clit, you were already trying to last longer then you wanted, but you guess that is out of the window now. The sensation from his digits in you and circling your clit was getting to much, your hands came up to grab his helm 

“Jazz, please.” 

You were able to get out in between moans and whines. The knot was going to break any second now, and you wanted to be vocal about it. 

“Yeah, come baby.” 

You did just that, came all over his digits. His pace not once slowing or stopping, a steady pace as you rode your high out on his servo. Wiggling and grinding your hips into that same servo in an attempt to keep the high longer. 

“Don't worry, I’m not done just yet.” 

He moves to help you out of the dress straps and moves it down below your breast, servos moving to play with the flesh, pitching one nipple and rolling the other with his digits. A sharp gasp came from you, He pulled you into him, this time it was more aggressive as he littered your neck and jaw with kisses. 

“You're so pretty, you know that.” 

He lets go of you and pushes you face first into the mattress. 

“Pretty enough to take my spike.” 

The sound of his shuffling around behind, as you took your panties off and hiked you dress up above your hips, why not give him better access. He smacks his spike against your pussy, causing you to let out a dreamy sigh. After that he didn't waste any time, pushing his spike straight into you. His servos are going to grab your hips immediately after, his grip tighter than any other time. His pace was steady, he occasionally flexed his digits. He let out a few grunts here and there, but nothing was louder than your moans. 

“Primus, you take my spike so good.” 

You felt your walls clench down on his spike, now he really knew what dirty talk did to you. His servo came down with a smack, the noise jolting you from your haze, his pace picked up, and a loud groan came from him. 

“Yeah, keep that up baby. You might get me to come first.” 

He lifted your hips up and fucked into you, his grip brusing the soft skin. You knew there'd be some sort of imprint tomorrow. His spike felt like it was kissing the knot forming. You guessed his grip on your hips wasn't enough, because he had now moved one of his servos to grab the dress, bunching it up in his hand and holding onto it like he was in a rodeo and fucking into your pussy, and god you were enjoying it. Every little noise coming from you sounded like you were in a porno. 

“Yeah, you like that pretty girl.” 

His pace quickening, you felt like you were going to crumble, once that knot snapps you’d be no more, and that time was coming quicker and quicker by the second. You whined to jazz, he whined back at you. 

“What is it, you're gonna come?” 

He knew he was making you feel good, because god you were making him feel good.  You nodded the best you can through the movement from his pounding. 

“Oh primus, I love how you can’t control yourself,” 

His free servo coming down on your ass, that signature smack. He enjoyed watching the way your ass jiggled from the hit, he liked watching just like your boobs, the way they both jiggle, but more importantly the way he saw your skin move like waves when he brought your hips into his. God not only was your pussy intoxicating to him your entire being was intoxicating. You smile, the way you hand fit in his, your kisses, the simple way you looked at him, it was like watching you fall in love with him every time. You were far too intoxicating, just like his own brand and he just couldn't get enough. 

“If you wanna cum, I’ll let you, just one request.” 

Your arms are stretched in front of you on the bed, gripping the sheets beneath them.

“Anything, I’ll do anything,” 

You were practically moaning out your response, you’d simply do anything to come, to feel the warm welcome of hot desire. 

“Tell me who you belong to.” 

His free servo was now gripping your waist, pulling your hips to meet his thrusts every time. His grunts were starting to be more consistent, he was close. Far closer than you thought he’d be. You thought about his request, any other time you wouldn’t even think twice to say it. You thought about it like your life depended on it, but you really didn’t care. He's yours right now, not buried in someone else right now, he was buried deep in you, and that was simply all you needed to know. 

“You, I belong to you Jazz.” 

You grip on the sheets tightening. 

“Come on, keep it up. Gotta have everyone hear this. Can’t have anyone trying to take you now.” 

His servo let go of the dress now both on your hips, as he was hunched over, Spike going in and out with lewd noises as you both almost went over the edge. 

"Yours, I'm yours jazz.” 

You were almost not able to get your words out, you let out a few more moans before you crumbled, the last moan being dragged out as Jazz released into you. He let out a groan, thrusting his hips into you a few more times before stopping. The only thing heard within your bedroom was both you and Jazz trying to catch your breaths. 

“You're always so good.” 

You laughed, taking your time to recollect yourself before speaking. 

“Of course, You’re all I ever wanted.” 

[sashi-ya]

I just realize that if you include the "NSFW" word in your posts tumblr literally block them from showing to the rest EVEN IF YOU HAVE ALL THE "FILTERS" TURNED OFF. SHAME ON YOU TUMBLR, FUCK YOU VERY MUCH.

I WON'T USE THAT WORD NO MORE, if a damn minor sees/reads my content then blame it to fucking tumblr. I'm tired of having more than 5k followers and barely any readers. THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG. By chance they find a reblog from any of my fics and they follow, but then? no more fics are shown to them. I felt so sad cause I thought my fics were becoming worse and shitty but now I see it's not just me.

fuckyoufuckyoufuckyou discouraging writers who work hard to improve while the site is flooded by stupid porn bots. Every time I open the GIF tag there is at least one dick being sucked and then tumblr has the aduacity of censorshiping content that's perfectly labeled and tagged.

fuck you again.

[blue-sadie]

Unknown Planet

Cal Kestis x Jedi Reader x Neteyam

Jedi Fallen Order

Summary: the mantis takes a hit leading to an unscheduled landing on a unknown planet

Warning: bold words = Na'vi, T-Bot

Yn/3rd person pov

"Greez watch out" I yelled as a empire ship fired at us hitting one of our wings "jumping into hyperdrive" cal muttered pushing the lever, I was forced into my chair as we entered hyperdrive "fuck this couldn't get any worse" I growled.

"Leaving hyperspace" cere warned and the mantis creeked and shook as we slowed down coming out into a peaceful galaxy I breathed out a sigh of relief unbuckling my seatbelt "how much damage do we have" cere murmured as I started using the scanner on my arm.

"The wing and engine is damaged needs immediately attention" I said looking at cal "what is the closest planet" I asked, he looked at BD who only beeped "a planet called pandora" he spoke running a hand through his hair "greez find a safe space to land so we can get to work" I sighed walking out the room.

"Hey you ok" cal murmured following me as I grabbed my bottle of water and taking a sip "it's like we do this everyday cal I'm tired of it" I said my eyes welding up with tears "do what everyday" I laughed dryly "we win against the empire only to get defeated the next its like a never ending loop we can't get out of and I'm sick of it" I muttered slamming my bottle down.

"We can never win" I choked as tears started running down my face "we fight and lose so much I can't take it anymore..... I just can't" I whispered the last part looking down at the ground he wrapped his arms around me "hey we can't give up now we've done so much" he reasoned "look we defeated most of the sisters and escaped darth vader himself we freed more planets then I could count because that's what we do".

I stared up at him "we have more wins then loses" he smiled "found a spot" greez called snapping us back into existence "I'll go get the tools" cal said pulling back and giving me a soft smile before leaving I sighed heavily and braced myself as the mantis landed "the airs not breathable so put these on" cere said and handed me a little device to me, greez and cal as he came back holding a box of tools.

I put the device on my neck and the others did the same "open her up" cal said excitedly and waited for the door to open "I'll catch up with you just now" I murmured as the walked out the door "now pandora what is the situation with you" I said to myself looking up pandora in my scanner "pandora, a planet revolved are a deity called eywa, that's cool, the natives speak a language called na'vi.... hey t-bot" I called in my tiny robot throwing her one of my small translators to her

"Please download the na'vi language on there" she beeped taking the device into her system "now what else do we know about pandora" I murmured scrolling down on the holographic screen "earth 28619 has been trying to take over and caused a horrific war which is still on going the main person being toruk makto or his human name jake sully" I spoke and turned off the screen "we better steer clear of the natives I don't think they'll like us here" I said picking up t and placing her on my shoulder as she beeped softly.

I walked outside and gaped at the beautiful view we landed on a small sand island surrounded by dark blue ocean with a few big rocks standing out "glad you finally decided to join us" cal laughed sliding off the roof and landed next to me "I did some research on the planet we should stay away from any natives" I said crossing my arms "come on have a little fun with place is nice" he smiled and chucked me a tool which I barely caught.

"You break one of my tools and I'll kill you" I muttered and followed him as he leaped back onto the roof "if you catch me you can" he yelled out running away "here t start with the smaller repairs" I murmured placing t on the roof before running after him "you bastard" I yelled out dodging some of the tools he threw at me "guys stop behaving like children" cere called and greez just cheered us on "got ye" I muttered grabbing his hood tightly "shit" he yelled as he pulled us off the edge and landed on the ground with a thud "dickhead" I groaned smacking him as I got off the ground shaking all the dirt off of me.

"Hey at least you weren't the one landed on" he whined stretching out his muscles I rolled my eyes before something in the distance caught my attention "somethings out there" I murmured pointing into the distance and cal followed my gaze "maybe it's friendly" he shrugged "doubt it" I murmured putting my hand on my light saber incase it decides to come closer.

Neteyam pov

"They don't have masks on" lo'ak said as he passed the binoculars to me "new experiment maybe" kiri grumbled diving back down into the water with her ilu "whatever it is must die" I muttered before looking into the binoculars and my breath hitched as I saw the two humans looking at us, the girl had her hand on her hip holding something "I'm gonna go get closer" lo'ak said and dived down before I could protest "lo'ak, lo'ak" I yelled but he didn't hear me I growled lowly and hit the water before following him.

Yn/3rd person pov

"I don't like this" I muttered and glanced at cal as he went back to work on the ship "your probably just being paranoid" greez said as he worked on the wing "yeah like you were on dathomir" I responded making cere and cal burst into laughter as I turned my attention back to the water it didn't feel right the planet didn't feel right.

"T pass me the translator" I called and caught the device as she released it and placed it on my throat "I know your out there" I called out "yn come on work on the shi-" cal said but was interrupted as two men surfaced out the water I pulled out my light saber and split it into two before igniting it "you know na'vi" the taller on said as they came a few steps ahead of me.

"We mean no harm our ship was damaged in battle and just need to do some repairs and we'll be out your hair" I spoke carmly "nice glow sticks" the other one laughed and the taller one just rolled his eyes and slapped the other one on the back of the head "I'm neteyam, this stupid one here is lo'ak" he murmured "what are you, you don't seem like the normal humans we get here" neteyam said looking between me and cal.

"Yeah he different isn't human" lo'ak chuckled gesturing to greese "we aren't from earth 28619 we are known as jedi and greez is latero" I murmured putting away my light sabers "jedi what's that" lo'ak asked tilting his head "we fight for the freedom of the galaxy" I answered crossing my arms "ok so your kinda like what my dad did" he said scratching the back of his head "you speak basic" I smiled.

"yeah our dad tought us" neteyam grinned "you should come with us to meet him he'll totally love you and your glow sticks" lo'ak chuckled putting his arm on neteyams shoulder "nah we're good but thanks for asking" cal murmured harshly as he jumped down I nudged his shoulder "maybe we could learn something" I muttered.

"But you said we should stay away from them" cal reasoned turning to me fully I rolled my eyes in annoyance "fine your right no thanks guys" I murmured looking at neteyam as he stared back into my eyes for some reason he made me feel safe "uh bro we should go" lo'ak said snapping us out our daze a light blush dusted my cheeks.

"Uh we're gonna go i-i'll see you soon" he smiled and gave me a little wave before leaving "come on let's get back to working" cal said and he went back to working but I just watched them leave 'why did neteyam feel like home' "yn come on" he called again I sighed out a deep breath before grabbing some tools to fix the engine.

-Night Time-

I layed out on the sand watching the night sky as the small fire kept me warm "I see your enjoying our beautiful night sky" I jolted up as I heard neteyams voice "yeah its really pretty" I smiled tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear the blush returning to my face as he sat close to me.

"It's not the only beautiful thing here" he murmured nudging my shoulder I giggled nervously as my blush darkened "how about I take you for a ride" he said nodding towards his ilu "i-i sure" I stuttered and took his hand when he offered it to me "careful the waters cold" he smiled stepping into the water.

A shiver ran up my spine as I stepped into the water "don't be scared" he murmured gently pulling me into his chest and lifting me onto the creature who let out soft murmurs and squeaks "I'll keep you safe" he whispered climbing on behind me and wrapped his arms around me securely.

"Legs go" he murmured as the creature started to move and was careful not to go fully submerge into the water "there's the 3 brother rocks" he pointed to each land mark as we passed them and his hands tightened around me as I shivered "I'll take you back now I don't want you to get sick" he said turning the ilu around and he chuckled as I let out an unsatisfied whine.

"I'll come back tomorrow I promise" he smiled and we started sharing little facts about eachothers lives and some missions I went on "dam now your life sounds way cooler then mine" he laughed as he slowly came to a stop as we made it back to the mantis "here ma-lady" he said hoping off before helping me off.

"I had a great time thank you neteyam" I beamed up at him as we made it to shore "it was wonderful to show you around" he said scratching the back of his head I bit my lip nervously looking up at him before pulling him down by his arms and pecking his cheek "I really mean it" I whispered backing up and giving him a small wave before entering the mantis.

-Next Day-

"Morning c" I smiled stretching out my tired muscles "hey yn" I sighed hearing cals voice "yes cal" I murmured turning to him "I just wanted to say I'm sorry for being an ass yesterday and I was being unfair" he said and his words actually made me smile "thank you for realizing that" I smiled before walking outside "so t what else do we still have to do" I asked the small bot, she beeped a few times "so we'll be out before sun sets" I murmured kinda sad.

"Yeah back on our fight against the empire" cal cheered wrapping his arm around my shoulder I sighed heavily "can't we stay here for a few more days" I said glancing at him "w-what why would you want to" cal murmured his eyes filled with hurt "I want to learn more about the planet and neteyam said he would help me" I said shyly looking down at the floor.

I heard cal gulp and breathe out "yeah ok I g-guess" he said, I looked at him shocked "really" I asked excitedly and jumped up and down as he nodded "thank you thank you thank you" I squealed wrapping my arms around and let go as I heard neteyam come out the water "neteyam I'm staying here for a few more days" I squealed running to him and he laughed out pulling me into a hug.

But behind the two was a jealous jedi who just felt like he lost his reason to fight the war.

[butter-your-flies]

Finally, an intro post

Hello! I'm River and I use any pronouns! I am a minor, I don't mind adults following me but don't be a fucking weirdo

Main fandoms

The Legend of Zelda

Linked Universe

Bonus Links

Linked Maze

Tangled/Tangled the Series

Vat7K

Luca

I also occasionally post/reblog things about My Little Pony, Adventure Time, The Owl House, Amphibia, How to Train Your Dragon, Trolls, my favorite music artists, and more

My current obsession(s): My Chemical Romance

River Rates Tangled the Series

Every year I rewatch the show, and this year I decided to start rating each episode as I watch. I will also be rating the songs in episodes that have them, along with overall season ratings. I'll be doing this every year until I get tired of it to see how my opinions change.

This year's tag is #river rates tangled the series (2024), and for other rewatch content unrelated to my rating series, go to #river rewatches tangled the series. For polls, go to #you rate tangled the series (2024)

DNI

People who romantically ship family members, minors and adults, romance/sex repulsed aroace characters with anyone, real people, basically anything problematic

People who hate on nonproblematic ships and oc x canon ships (you're annoying)

Blank blogs, if you're gonna follow me you're gonna have to be more than a default pfp with no reblogs. I automatically assume you are a bot, and even if you're not a bot part of tumblr is reblogging things...

Racists, homophobes, transphobes, misogynists, zionists, terfs, and other bigoted dumbasses. This is not a space for you

NSFW/kink blogs go away, I'm a minor

Basically if you suck leave

Other Stuff

I occasionally write but I haven't posted anything in a very long time

I also draw, mostly traditional. I'm not very good, but I've improved significantly recently!

I'm a huge Revalink fan :3

I love to ship characters and nobody can stop me

My ask box is always open and anon is enabled, so PLEASE send me asks I promise I don't bite I love talking to people I'm just socially awkward :,)

Embrace cringe!

I post stuff about my life a lot and I also sometimes vent but not very often and most if not all of my vent posts get deleted. All personal life posts are tagged #personal stuff and all vents are tagged #vent so if you want to filter it out feel free!

Most of my posts including reblogs are queued just to keep my blog consistent (if I didn't queue stuff i would go dead for like 2 months and then reblog 36283738 things one day just to dissapear and i dont want it to be like that) so my queue tag is #butter your queue (so original, I know)

Other Socials

Tiktok-@rivloveszelda

Instagram-@rivlovescats

Youtube-@rivloveszelda

Mutuals feel free to ask for my airbuds, spotify, personal instagram, and discord

[la-princessaa]

Not to be negative Nancy out here on this absolutely gorgeous Tuesday morning, but, I am tired. And it may just be that I'm a big baby (entirely an option) but man. See, I never used to mind it (until I started processing some things, then it got sketch and dice), or, rather, I suppose it just didn't affect me as much. I didn't like it, I wished it wouldn't happen because that's fucking weird, but it didn't cause the distress it does now. The rise of porn bots, onlyfans, and just the general increase of sexualized imagery targeted at, well, anyone who uses the internet. Very specifically in spaces that are not for it.

Twitter pushes porn posts if you've made a new account and haven't followed anyone. Tumblr still has that tagging problem with the bots. And I can't even really block anything anywhere because it's become custom to try and make sure people see it and do whatever with it. I've seen and heard of people with onlyfans messaging people on forums for people with porn addictions that are trying to quit so they stop ruining their lives and relationships. That's mega fucked. I'm all for people doing what they want in the spaces for it. This isn't about that at all. This is about it being pushed, and thrown into, honestly, my face, when I'm just trying to look at my hobbies on Tumblr because I cannot go on any other site without being triggered.

I haven't fully learned to cope with my disorder, which is something I'm working on. Seeing an image of a woman that I feel I need to look like to be loved and desired will set me back weeks. Porn is fantastic for this. It's terrible that it's everywhere. Yeah, some of this is on me, but again, in spaces that are not for advertising or showing off pornography, is where I go. I don't go into a pornographic tag and go "oh there's porn here and now I can't function". I go into the b/jd tag to look at dolls because I love dolls, and then I see porn bots and now I can't function. And it is exhausting. And I can't even block the tags or anything because they are random. Just to make sure it's seen. Tumblr is the only social media I've limited myself to because of this but it still happens. It just sucks.

[mandiemegatron]

Theres no way you have 900 followers 🙄 all you do is scream about your self ship with a fictional man that would want nothing to do with you and write garbage that an AI bot could write better. I'm a big writer in the one piece fandom and even I only have 200 followers and my writings actually make sense. You don't have to lie to make yourself seem better 🙄

You know, I was about to give you a scathing response, but honestly, I'm just so tired.

I actually have 907.

I need you to understand that I don't do this for the followers. I don't do it for the likes, or the reblogs. I do it for FUN, and for those who enjoy the same things I do.

The amount of entitlement coming off this ask actually makes me pity you. I seriously feel so bad for you, that you feel so threatened by me that you felt the need to send me something like this. I am so sorry that people have hurt you and made you feel like this was an appropriate thing to say to someone. I'm not a famous writer, I'm not an influencer or a big name in fandom, I'm just a person who loves to write and pretend to exist with my fictional man.

Is that so terrible?

Truly, I am sorry that you have been made to think that everything is about the numbers. That the likes and reblogs are what matter, that the number of people who follow you are what matter. What matters is that you love the things you create and that you love sharing them with others. That's it! Connecting with people, creating things that other people enjoy, that's the core value of fandom. The likes and reblogs are just a bonus (though you should absolutely reblog peoples creations, whether it be writing or artwork, that's how tumblr works.)

You sound young, judging by the amount of bitterness seeping out of this ask, so I will give you the benefit of the doubt. Numbers are not everything. If you get one like on something you made, feel proud. That means someone, somewhere, saw what you created and went HELL YA! I LOVE THAT! Social media has created a black hole that sucks the life out of creating things simply for the sake of creating.

I truly hope this helps you see from a different perspective. Maybe take a break for a bit, go outside or grab a coffee. You are too riled up over things that seriously do not fucking matter. Take a deep breath and move on.

[therandosfandos]

Summary: Bender recalls a memory of his counterpart from when he used the bathroom where Fry shoved him into a freezer, it goes as good as you would expect it to

Maybe worse

Bender felt strange to say the least. Had that all really happened?

He was trembling slightly. He looked around for his best friend. Fry was alive and well. The virus was out of his system. The paradox he created has been fixed. It was all over. Everything was fine. Except, it didn't feel like that to the bending unit.

Fry runs up to his best friend and Bender backs up instantly, flinching. His optics widen, was he really that afraid to be touched?

His human friend was now looking guilty and worried. Bender sighed heavily, "it...it's okay, not your fault" he manages to mumble loud enough for the orange haired man to hear.

The robot felt weak. It felt like he hadn't had a drink in decades. He groans as he falls backwards onto the hard floor which caused the entire crew to look at him. He glares but another groan of pain escaped him.

"Bender?" Leela walks up to the robot and sits on one knee, hand holding the floor with the other one resting on the knee. The mutant seemed worried as well, "are you okay?"

Bender didn't want to answer her. He just turned away. Leela sighs and gets back up. She walks over to the others. Bender was grateful that he was left alone but he didn't really want to be. It was a mix of want and unwant at this point.

The memories come back, from himself and the hundreds of clones he had created. His optics widen once again as he recalls a certain memory from the one he asked to watch for Fry so he could use the bathroom. Bender stands back up, a bit wobbly. He marches over to Fry with a glare and he was now shaking.

"You..." He starts out, "you locked me...in a freezer" The robot growls. Fry's eyes widen at this. He raises his hands up in a defensive position. Something occurs to him, Fry had seen another clone of him back in the past before he left. He saw it happen and didn't do anything about it. All he wanted was a slice of pizza. Fry made a note to slap himself when given a chance.

"For...a million years..." Bender was staring off, his eyes looking directly at the ground. His hands were clenching and unclenching. Fry reaches out but pulls back his hand once Bender growls. He knew how Bender was, if the robot snapped, it wouldn't be a pretty sight.

Benders face was darker than ever. Fry could hear sniffles come from the robots voice box. Everyone in the crew turned to watch them now but Bender didn't care anymore. Bender was sick and tired of everything. Bender was just used like a fucking object and a slave to some weird alien scammers who worked in the nude, why wouldn't he be?

"Why?" That was all Bender could get out at the moment. Silence followed. Bender was getting more frustrated and angrier, "WHY!?"

Fry, startled but willing, approached his best friend cautiously, "Bender, I know what you're talking about, I just can't explain it" Fry says, he knows what his counterpart was feeling at the moment it happened, but it was still a clone himself from the year 3000. That Fry would have known Bender as his best friend too. What had happened? It didn't make sense.

Bender just glares at his taller boyfriend. He was visibly tearing up and was shaking much worse. Fry could only do what he could. He reaches out, pulls Bender into a hug and rubs circles on his metal back. Bender, who wasn't expecting it, instantly froze. His systems felt like they were malfunctioning.

The robot couldn't hold it anymore, he buries his head into the red fabric of Fry's jacket and starts sobbing heavily. He let himself and his ego go. It wasn't worth it anymore.

Fry sighs and whispers soothing words to the small bot, "I'm sorry...I'm so so sorry...I didn't know I would ever do that"

Bender was shaking so bad, it bounced back with Fry. The human didn't mind it though. Fry continues, "I should have just shut you off or found the button to help you, that was wrong of me..." He knew Bender wouldn't believe him at the moment if he said it was his counterpart. Bender was in too much of a panic and traumatic state at the moment.

"I love you, I love you so so much, baby boy" Fry whispers softly, kissing Benders foghat grey metal forehead.

After a bit, sobs died down into hiccups. Bender nuzzled gently into Fry's jacket as he was laying on the human. Bender had tuckered himself out into sleep mode.

Maybe if Fry told him later, Bender would believe him? He didn't count on it. It was worth the shot though.

He didn't care if everyone was staring at him and his robot boyfriend at this point. At least Bender had calmed down. That's what mattered most to him.

[calechipconecrimes]

fuck it. REAL mutuals simulator

0 notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

🌚 newmooty

first post! i hope it goes well >_<

🔁 the-feeling-is-mutual

K

🔁 a-mutual-attraction

U

🔁 i-love-spam

M

🔁 mootiepatootie

🔁 i-love-spam

guys am i actualy stupid

13 notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

getting real tired of people makign fun of my typong skiils

🔁 mootybooty

maybe try typing correctly

🔁 i-love-spam

you are gonig to kie in severn days

5 notes

👻 mootiepatootie 🔁

🧑‍🦰 your-mil Follow

my dash is full of the same like five people and they're all insane

🔁 mootiepatootie

sorry we're all in a polycule together. actually it's time for our daily scheduled five way kiss

🔁 granpamutual-deactivated20240413

back in my day we had orgies with our mutuals every hour

🔁 mootiepatoote

woah... you're so wise

#bringing this back to honor his memory

15 notes

😍 a-mutual-attraction

is it me or is @zombiemoot a bot

#like i'm no expert but a lot of what they're saying is incomprehensivle

2 notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

👶 cheddar-baby Follow

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

37.4k notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

👶 cheddar-baby Follow

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

37.4k notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

👶 cheddar-baby Follow

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

37.4k notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

👶 cheddar-baby Follow

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

37.4k notes

🧟 zombiemoot

The game came from the windy heights where Mario made his first million. I don't really care what the color blue says, however the Georgia peach gets kidnapped.

4 notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

👶 cheddar-baby Follow

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

37.4k notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

👶 cheddar-baby Follow

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

37.4k notes

👻 mootiepatootie 🔁

🌚 newmooty

first post! i hope it goes well >_<

🔁 the-feeling-is-mutual

K

🔁 a-mutual-attraction

U

🔁 i-love-spam

M

🔁 mootiepatootie

11 notes

💏 the-feeling-is-mutual

@i-love-spam reblogs without comment so much because they can't type for shit

#i say this with all the love possible #buddy you gotta at least go back and fix stuff

5 notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

👶 cheddar-baby Follow

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

37.4k notes

🍑 mootybooty 🔁

😍 a-mutual-attraction

reblog if you think kung pow penising should be a nationally recognized sport

#me omw to the olympics to get a gold medal

18 notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

👶 cheddar-baby Follow

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

37.4k notes

🍖 i-love-spam 🔁

👶 cheddar-baby Follow

What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

37.4k notes

💏 the-feeling-is-mutual

this is your sign to stop scrolling and do the thing. drink water. eat food. finish assignment. doesn't matter. do it.

or else

[shatar-aethelwynn]

So I've been watching the Live feature at the top of my screen in the app for a while now. Not browsing, not using, just noting the photos of the three users visible, and I have formed the following conclusion about the people who use it: 90% female presenting, and almost all of them use user photos that would raise red flags for most users as "BOT!!!" due to their lack of clothing and pouty expressions. (Shout out to the one scantily clad dude that's been showing up lately, diversity I guess) Is this an accurate assessment? Don't know. Don't care.

God, not being able to turn that shit off is so fucking annoying. I really am getting tired of the first thing I see when I open the app being barely dressed women simmering at me. If you want to see it, or post it, that's a you choice, but we curate our own experiences on this site, and I'm vexed that that ability is being systematically taken away. I do not want to see barely dressed people every time I open the app. Hell, most of the time I dont want to see photos of people at all. Live users: please use more animal photos instead.

[laalaaisqueen]

I think I accidentally wrote a new story-this wasn't supposed to be a 4 minute read

The chainsaw felt suddenly heavy in his hands. At least it didn't land on his feet. He breathes heavily staring at Po's corpse and the hair he lost in his fight with her. It's still fairly long, so he won't complain much.

His pale eyes pan over to where he saw Noo-Noo last and emitted a surprise noise.

Did he escape while Guardian was distracted with Po's huge spider form? Or maybe the half bot never intended on taking Po with him.

He opens his mouth to ask Laa-Laa (she had been standing back, yelling at him to just run into the station) if she saw where Noo-Noo went.

But instead he screamed in surprise.

This was due to a sharp pain hitting his back, his hoodie was pretty old and worn out so it didn't protect much from whatever entered his back.

There was little he could do to stop the person from shoving him forward. Due to how tired his body is from the fight.

He dropped the chainsaw so he could try to catch himself on the dirt.

The hat went flying off his head.

They continued to hit him with the sharp object. Guardian's leg tried to kick at the person but a different kind of pain shot through his body when a hand roughly grabbed his antenna.

"OW! FUCK!" He never usually swore but surely this was a reason.

They smacked his head on the ground for several moments while he struggled but the pain in his head made it hard to focus.

For fucks sake, why won't he die?!

The yellow Teletubby lets him roll over, he insultingly looked shocked. His nose bleeding from when she was smacking his face against the ground.

Does he really expect me to be okay with him killing one of my friends?

Laa-Laa stabs his throat with her sharped rock that she had been holding onto the whole time. She truly wasn't intended to kill him at any point when they left the Outskirts.

But that changed.

She stabbed him repeatedly in the chest while her mind raced.

I'm literally killing a Teletubby.

I don't need him anymore.

She tightens her jaw and tries to push away the feeling that rose up at that thought. A light sense of relief climbs up her shoulders once she notices he's stopped moving.

Laa-Laa backs off from his body, heavily breathing, her hands shaky. Her vision going blurry with tears, she felt like she was going to...faint.

Anne didn't know what to expect at the station, it took forever for them to leave due to Miles insisting he needed to find his one-in-kind boots, but two-technically three-bodies.

"...Is that a fucking spider?" To be fair, the red body was the most obvious due to how huge it is.

Anne cautiously approaches the other two. She didn't need to look too closely to see if the dirty looking form was alive. Very clearly dead.

But she could tell the yellow form is breathing, just passed out. She picked up her unconscious body in one arm and only then noticed the bloody weapon.

It could be possible she is the reason why this guy is dead. It's not easy at all to tell what the motive would be. The only way to find out is questioning.

She walks back towards the other soldiers.

"What about the other one ma'am?" One of them was most likely eyeing the dead one, though unclear through the helmet.

"His throat and chest is bleeding, he ain't alive." She sets the passed out Tubby inside the helicopter. "This one seems to be the only survivor here." She doesn't bother mentioning the sharp rock.

A green blur rushes past her into a seat. "We need to get the Fucking out of here." Miles huffed and puffed as if he ran ten circles around the base.

"Why, is the spider actually alive?"

Conor follows behind, though not small enough to be a blur. "There's no time to explain, we'll be dead if we stay here."

Anne was baffled at what was making these two run so fast but Conor being worried about looming death convinced her to get into the front seat. The others climb in, a bit confused at the situation.

That is until they were high in the sky, looking down at tiny creatures stumbling over the hills.

"Come on you two, you're scared of tiny monsters?"

"Perhaps you missed the amount of tiny monsters?!"

"I passed math, I can see 'em just fine."