#i'm so damn pissed right now
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medicinemane · 4 months ago
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I don't know... horrible things happen all around the world and it's not a competition
Atrocities are committed against multiple groups in multiple parts of the world at the exact same moment, and none of them erase each other. They all matter, all the people in this world who are being brutalized matter. There shouldn't be any line you draw where one group doesn't actually matter as much as another
You're welcome to prioritize your energy towards helping one group or another, but what's not ok is invalidating or dismissing people who are actively being harmed
Same goes for trying to figure out which social group has things worst (and lets be honest, always using a US lens)
Like... maybe the important thing is to prop each other up and help everyone get on their own feet rather than trying to... pick fights about if physical disabilities or mental illness are less respected (I'm trying to pick a more absurd example but sadly I've seen exactly that argument happen before). Maybe it doesn't really matter and what matters is helping who we can when we can
I'm tired of it, I'm just fucking tired of it. Support people, champion them when the world is just brutalizing them, but you don't need to throw a single other person under the bus to do that
Which seems to be an absolutely impossible lesson for people to learn
#I won't say anything else on this; but I will say that to me one of the groups that it feels like is most forgotten is Syrians#including by me if I'm honest#I don't know what's currently happening in Syria... but... my understanding is it still hasn't really gotten better#assad is still brutalizing people last I had heard#so rather than saying anything else I'd prefer to simply focus on some people it feels like were forgotten back during Obama#and... and have remained forgotten#and I'm sorry I can't do more to help with the suffering in the world#but... you notice what I'm not having to do here?#I'm not having to throw a single other person under the bus#I'm able to just focus on how much I wish for Syrians to be ok (which is a hollow gesture on my part in many ways I think)#and I can keep all the focus on Syrians rather than throwing anyone else under the bus or doing any whataboutism#and that's literally all I'm asking of you fucking people#don't downplay human misery to try and make your thing seem more important#they're both fucking important... they're all important#there's so much suffering I can't even keep up with it#there's so much of it that I can only name without knowing the details; Congo; I believe Sudan is still suffering; Haiti#I don't know how things are in Ethiopia right now... I can't keep track#and none of these situations and the horrible things they're dealing with; things I haven't even been able to follow#none of it detracts from and of the issues I am following more closely#I don't need to compare them and say 'well it's not as bad'; because... bad is bad and any is too much#and nothing I say here will do a damn thing; no one'll hear and even if they did they'd ignore it or get pissed#that's what my evidence shows me about how people behave#but suffering isn't a competition; the correct amount is zero#and... perhaps I'd have more tolerance if I hadn't watched how you behave with stuff#...the worst part is the person I adore who... man... I wish I could just get them to really think through their words#they mean well; they're coming from a place of love; but I just haven't been able to paint the picture for them of the harm#and I'm flawed; I don't have all the answers; I could be wrong here#but... can you at least see why I feel that maybe we shouldn't pit misery against each other#that the people suffering have more in common with each other than opposed and... maybe westerners aren't fucking helping#eh... too fucking drained thinking about this; end of tags
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gryffindorkus · 10 months ago
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HOLY SHIT I JUST FOUND A 7K SCORBUS FIC THAT I HAD BEEN WORKING ON BUT NEVER FINISHED AND IT'S SO FUNNY I'M GOING TO COMPLETE IT OH MYG OD
the writing is from 7 years ago so it's really cool to see how I've improved...
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lannisterdaddyissues · 6 months ago
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checked my final grades last week and now i'm super pissed off bc it seemed that my physics lab director "forgot" to give one of my makeup labs to my TA for grading and i got a zero on it which dropped my letter grade from an A to a B, and i emailed him AND my lab coordinator asking for a regrade. it's been 5 days since then and neither one of them has responded. wtf am i supposed to do now.
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hylianengineer · 9 months ago
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I need to find whoever decided computers should have warranty information buried under 3 layers of website pages, a nearly illegible number on the bottom of my laptop, and a manual full of the smallest print I've ever seen, and dump a bucket full of nasty swamp water directly on their head.
Oh now they're forcing me to download an app. Perhaps I should put toe biters in that swamp water.
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running-in-the-dark · 10 months ago
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it's like. I'm tired. but also not the right kind of tired. but really really tired though. except I won't be able to sleep yet so I have to stay awake. it is stressing me out.
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t4tstarvingdog · 1 year ago
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i am just. hating tumblr more and more. haha..
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kaedeakeshisworld · 22 days ago
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Vent post
Hidden/ private whatever the fuck like number
Don't call my phone, I will not answer it
Also don't call my phone with some sassy attitude talmbout I called you when I didn't
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rens-denn · 1 month ago
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I love being a selfish asshole. I like that it keeps us alive.
I wish staying alive didn't have to come with consequences inherently. But it would suck ass to die.
'Bestie' (I'm calling him B now) says that keeping food in our room isn't sanitary. Uhm, kys? It's how we survived, he knows that, I'm not fucking giving that shit up!! It's not even just that it helped us ensure we had food for later. It also gave us a comfortable way to GET food when we needed it, in case going OUT to get food felt uncomfortable (That's something we didn't think of and thus didn't tell him).
I'm going to be selfish. I'm going to cause problems. You're supposed to help me out, right? Then fucking do it. I'm not gonna ask only to regret it or realize we weren't mentally prepared nor ready for it.
If only we could fucking ignore roommate (S) better. Honestly. It's that bullshit 'limerence' stuff, making us hyperaware of his presence. He's just an idiot, have you tried ignoring him and acting like he doesn't exist?
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emometalhead · 6 months ago
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#ran out of tags on last post but still want to rant without filling anyone's inbox or dash#sorry but here's the continuation#anyway so also we went to my grandma's house and I saw my dogs which breaks my heart every damn time#I miss them so much and it kills me. it causes me physical pain to not have them with me#I'm still mad at my mom to this day for being so horrible to them and giving them away. so it pissed me off to see her cuddling them#everyone disagrees with me but I don't think she has any right to act like she cares about them after she discarded them so easily#I will never stop being upset with her for it and even though everyone thinks I'm a b**** for it I refuse to release the grudge#anyway I'm tired and as nice as parts of my day were I feel like the lows were just really low#this morning we took some lovely graduation photos at my campus (which I visited for the last time) and I'm excited to post a few tomorrow#I'm truly proud of myself and grateful my college experience is over#I just foolishly allowed myself to have a vision of how today would go and parts of it really brought me down#I don't want to complain (which is probably a lie since this is the 3rd post I'm making to rant) but I wasn't expecting to breakdown today#I spent time with people I love and I got cool photos and a really soft sweater with my school's logo on it and I shouldn't be sad right now#plus we're having people over tomorrow for a party to celebrate me#I'm just really reliving the day and a lot of it was negative at my expense and I really hoped everyone would work to make it nice#some of it was obviously out of my family's hands but I feel like they handled that stuff in a way that guilted me and it sucked#I'm just a mess of emotions and I'm lowkey icing everyone out because I don't want to end my night crying again#welcome to real life I guess?#I really shouldn't complain#ashley rants#sorry if anyone read this
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medicinemane · 8 months ago
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Well, I'm getting to do therapy, ultra mega super fucking extreme edition for my mom today
She's having a fucking breakdown cause GOP cost cutting means medicaid is being a bitch and being like if you're on medicare you no longer qualify for medicaid unless you can work and then and only then will we let you do a buy in
It's bullshit, it sucks, it's a stupid and broken system and someone being on disability should count as any work, but she's having one of the most extreme fucking breakdowns of all time over it
Like we're talking going on about how it's all her fault that the cats died who were living in the trailer cause of how toxic she let that place become, or that she's an utterly selfish person... and I'm sat here having to find ways to spin shit because she puts me in a position where in order to get her functional... what? I say "yeah, pretty much"?
Then she's like "I apologize for anything I've ever done to you", not accepted and never will be. You're doing shit to me right this fucking second with this
There's no atonement and that's kind of tough shit, and maybe if you wanted atonement don't make me parent you right now
I'm having to talk her down from being suicidal, cause I'm fucking Machiavellian with shit and I need that disability check to keep coming in
She's crying and just having the biggest breakdown she's probably had since one of my worst memories which I'm actively working to suppress cause I can't deal with it right now. She's fucking going over the various ghost shit and apologizing for it, and it's like I don't fucking care, stop fucking trying to pure and make yourself the horror that made everything awful... you're pretending to take responsibility, but what you're really doing is demanding I absolve you of everything
You know, the shit she's saying and the shit I was saying yesterday aren't that different. We both think we're hugely worthless pieces of shit who are totally unlovable (and my grandma is probably to blame for both mindsets)
Difference is that for as much as I downplayed it and said it didn't even count as cleaning, I was fucking moving like 10 boxes around to try and get things in a state where I can figure out how to clean shit, where as she's a totally nonfunctional mess
Like as much as everyone seems to want to bitch about when I'm... literally just trying to share how not ok I'm doing as best I fucking can, even when I'm at my lowest I'm still trying to work on shit
...also, one thing that's different between her and me is I've never been emotionally incestuous with my kid to the point where the very concept of family makes them sick, made them be my parent, and am now forcing them to be my therapist despite the fact the emotionally engaging with them is one of the single most destructive things I can do
I don't know... I'm real shit today, I'm gonna have to be in the car for like 4 but really more like 6 hours with her cause of the way she drives, cause I've got to go see family today and it's gotta be today cause that's when my uncle's around
I'm basically... fucking animating myself, like I'm in that state where you're not letting yourself fall apart cause you gotta hold it together cause you don't have a choice (oh, and I haven't fucking slept cause right when I was gonna go to bed I got summoned to come play therapist)
I'm shit right now, and I was already in a bad way... and in fact I'm doing so badly that I can't even maintain my normal fucking facades and politeness... nope, turns out that's not true and in fact my facades run deeper than I do and I 100% am still not gonna say certain things
But yeah, it's a shit day, one of the worst in a while cause it's probably the worst my mom's been in like... two decades... so that's fucking great huh?
Bonus, this bullshit with medicaid has cut her therapy sessions
If anyone gets to be pissed at them it's me, and I fucking am pissed, they can go fuck themselves, and everyone who votes to cute medicaid can know that I personally dislike them immensely
Unlike my mom though I'm not a literal fucking 12 year old (not even kidding, her problem is she's emotionally still like 12 or 14, she's literally fucking stunted there). Unlike her... I fucking function even when I'm doing bad
But serious, I was awful yesterday, just absolutely one of my low points. Only reason maybe I seem better today is basically the emotional equivalent of adrenaline
I'd be falling apart right now except for the part where I never actually fall apart or have breakdowns
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wickedhawtwexler · 8 months ago
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i think linkedin going down right when i'm about to submit my daily job apps is a sign that i deserve a break today
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vice-s-assistant · 9 months ago
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Nothing like hopping on to tumblr and seeing someone post some dumb, possibly transphobic shit, that made me unfollow that fucking sinking ship. Fuck, I'm trying to fucking leave Twitter for that shit. Also, if you gonna post some stupid ass comic, then not state the shit you believe outright, at least fucking credit that piece of shit you stole it from, so I can block their ass too. Fuck.
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fmhobeus · 8 months ago
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so, nerdy loser college boy choso *sighs* *opens legs*
a/n: just so you know, this man is gonna make you do all the hard work for a piece of that loser boy dick 😮‍💨 so... um so at some point around 2000 words in i realised this is way more than a hc post :3 eat it up if you will!
nerdy!choso who borderline has no friends except his gaming buddies who doesnt meet irl like ever. he doesnt like going to classes, especially this one. he doesnt need it but it's a requirement for all first years. and boy is glad it is when he sees you come in.
nerdy!choso who only listens to discussions when you're talking. suddenly he needs to put down his headphones and nod at every word you're saying. his eyes follow every gesture of your hand, every sway of your ass, every single time you fix your hair.
nerdy!choso who is starting to get a bit enamored with you, your style, your way of speaking. he loses track of time gawking at you in class from the last benches as you prettily do all the work in the class. he hates how beautifully your hair falls on your face, how nicely your clothes fit you despite being pretty modest for college. he hates how he can see the silhouette of your tits when you turn to the side. but he's too much of a gentleman to keep looking.
nerdy!choso who ends a game early when he remembers you, lying and saying that he had promised someone to meet them somewhere. the place is his bathroom and the person was you. god, you really shouldn't wear those tight jeans to class y'know? how will he continue to be a gentleman if you do?
nerdy!choso who despises groupwork but prays to dear god this class has some reason to pair you two together. he's getting so desperate to talk to you knowing damn well he too pussy to do it on his own. and the lord answers his prayers, the teacher assigns groups of three for a presentation. it's you, him and some slacking trust fund baby.
nerdy!choso who is about to combust and have a full blown panic attack when he sees you approach him after class with that smile on your face that would make the angels swoon. you're going on about distributing the work equally and what not while he is trying his fucking hardest to not accidently make eye contact with you and piss his pants : (
nerdy!choso who now has your name, your number and your email and he feels like the happiest man on earth. his hands are literally shaking as he responds to your request to call. he's overthinking every word he types.
choso: yeah i can do wednesday. choso: i'll be okay with whatever day you want.
nerdy!choso who hops on video call and short circuits with a view of you in an oversized band tee and a brief view of your room. why did you have to be this pretty? why did you have to video call him when you couldve done the work on text? why did you have to put your hair up like that? why oh why did you have you say "choso? hey, you there?" so seductively to bring him back to the present?
nerdy!choso who gets like no work done in a 30 minute call which felt like three hours. he knew he would hardly be paying attention so decided to record the call with your consent, saying he'd need the notes you were typing out on screen only to play it back and stroke his dick to you for what might've have been the twentieth time this week. his strokes only getting faster as you say his name in that voice he imagines sounds way better moaning and screaming it instead.
nerdy!choso who, after the presentation, is on greeting terms with you when he sees you studying in the library. he sits as far away from you as he can while still being able to see you. occupying the coziest corner of the library to stare at you study right when you come up to him.
"can i join you, choso? i'm all alone and your space seems comfy" you say with a smile, "of course, i dont mean to disturb you, is saw you were on your own too, so..."
uh oh, uh oh, uh oh. god no. please no. please dont say yes. please dont be staring at her like some dumb idiot (too late) please.
"uh... yeah sure why not?" he awkwardly says as he makes room for you to keep your things. he was such an idiot for thinking he could say no to your pretty face in the first place.
nerdy!choso who is absolutely drunk on your scent. it feels way better than any alcohol he's ever had. he feels like an animal in heat when he smells your sugary perfume mixed with the styrofoam-y air conditioned smell of the library. you're gonna kill him, yknow? how is he supposed to respond to this? what is one to do when their stupid college crush sits next to them? he gives you a half smile before furiously typing away on reddit, the only place with answers for losers like him.
nerdy!choso whose hands. oh his hands. (can be i a big whore for a second?) his long hands that feel like they're the size of your face. his kempt, beautiful and trimmed nails. his lengthy fingers that seem to yearn for something more to foddle with than just the keyboard or controller. he typed as such an insane pace it made your pussy ache. he was going so fast, jesus. those hands were meant to do more than just ask "how to talk to girls" on reddit.
nerdy!choso who (on the advice of reddit) asks if you would want him to order something for you. you tell you had a frappuccino not too long ago and that it was quite sweet and filling. and he hates himself for thinking that he could give you something much sweeter and filling than that like a horny fourteen year old.
nerdy!choso who is now determined to not come off as a creep so he does his work with the focus of four adderalls. he is typing as fast as his heartbeat, not realising he got two classes worth of work done in just an hour. he looks over at you, blissfully unaware of the absolute war in his mind.
nerdy!choso who feels as though if he doesn't muster up the courage to ask you out right then and there, he'll probably be the biggest loser on the planet. (as if he wasn't already)
nerdy! pathetic! choso who stutters a million times and barely gets the job done then too. his eyes are scanning your entire being (trying his best to not gawk at your tits) for any sign of discomfort.
"so- uhh so ummm... wo-would you, like, uh... like to do this again? sometime?... i got a.. a lot of work done today, so.."
oh heavens, the sheer nervousness in his tone makes you want to pull his pants down and show him how to really get work done.
you agree with a smile, even suggesting a better, more ambient (more romantic) cafe to study in. choso's heart is about to burst and flood the fucking library with his blood the way it is beating at an alarming rate.
"umm yeah uh 5 sounds... awesome... i hope it isn't a-a bother to you?" "no way, choso. i loved today," you offer him a smile as you gather your things, "i really like your hair, by the way" "i like your hair too, y-y-you smell very nice", he gulps.
fuck. why did he say that? what? you smell nice? who says that? is he like ten? you can't help but giggle at the sheer embarassment on his face.
he feels as though he's gonna melt into a puddle and turn to stone and throw up all at the same time.
nerdy!choso who is the most stupidly hot guy you've ever met, you think as you go giggling back to your dorm. mental note: pick a skimpy outfit for 5pm ;)
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subbmissivesuccubus · 8 months ago
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Oh God. You were going to die. This was it. It wasn't demons or Muzan that take you in the end. It was your damn husband and his insatiable lust and stamina.
Lying face down on the bed, you panted against the mattress, your face a mess of tears and sweat, hair sticking to your forehead, eyes rolled up and cheeks painted a bright red. Behind you, tugging at his cock and eager for round...whatever the next number- was your husband.
Maybe you shouldn't have riled him up the way you did. You know how possessive he can be so why on Earth did you purposefully get him jealous by flirting with another man? Oh, right. Because you wanted to get fucked rougher. Well, you got what you wanted and now you're going to die.
You jumped as you felt the familiar sensation of a fat cock press against your entrance, your stuffed cunt instantly begging for mercy. You swore that if he fucked you one more time- made you cum one more time- filled you with his seed even one more time- you'd see the pearly white gates call for you.
You gripped onto the bedsheets and pulled yourself away, your body working on autopilot as your husband had successfully fucked the brain cells out of you. You heard him chuckle as you tried to crawl away, your body feeling like jelly, your arms and legs numb and barely capable of getting you to the edge of the bed before:
A pair of hands grabbed you by the hips and dragged you back, laughing at your whine of protest. Uzui reeled his hand back and smacked you across your already beaten ass before he spread your legs and gave an equally painful spank to your pussy, making you scream. "Now, what made you think that was a smart idea? Try running away again and see what happens."
Obanai lets you think you escaped before he grabbed you by the ankles, ignoring your cries as he pulled you back towards him. He flipped you onto your back like you weighed nothing, making you squeal as he took a nipple between his fingers and twisted, your back arching off the bed. "Are you trying to piss me off even more?"
Just as you reached the edge of the bed, wondering if you could make it, you felt Rengoku press himself against your back and- oh- fuck! He slid right inside you! You gasped as the man pushed his cock in with one fell swoop, taking your breath away as he instantly started moving his hips, preferring to fuck you where you were instead of dragging you back. "Get comfortable, baby. I'm not done with you."
Sanemi caught you the second you tried to move, simply reaching forward to grab a fistful of your hair and pull harshly. You yelped as your neck was forced to snap back, your back arching as your husband pulled at your hair, his other hand looping to the front to grab you by the neck before he leaned towards your ear and growled: "I'm going to give you a choice. I can fuck you here, on the bed, or I chase you and fuck you where I catch you and trust me, I won't be as nice."
Gyomei didn't say anything, even as you got off the bed and onto your wobbly feet. You wondered if you could just leave when he said, in his booming voice: "Are you sure that's what you want to do?" You froze, body trembling. Why was one sentence enough for you to rethink your whole lives decisions? You didn't know what Gyomei meant by it, but you knew it probably wouldn't be fun. With a gulp, you climbed back onto the bed before getting in front of your husband. You spread your legs wide as you lay down in front of him, reaching down to grab at his fat cock and press it against your entrance. The man smiled as he slowly started to sink inside your familiar heat. "Good girl."
Giyuu grabbed you by the legs and pulled you back while also changing his own position. To your horror, you found yourself slung over his knee, a predicament you just experienced an hour before which was why your ass was a bright red already. You started apologizing profusely, kicking your legs like a toddler but your husband simply ignored your pleas and held you down, the task quite easy for him even if one arm of his was free to do the spanking. "It seems one round wasn't enough to discipline you. Guess we have to go again."
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phantomrose96 · 22 days ago
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Tumblr can never be my main means of engaging in politics and it comes down almost entirely to Tumblr's pathological need to distill The Right Opinion:tm: from any complicated issue.
It's always the most important thing. Not because it helps solve the issue or helps the people impacted, but because The Right Opinion:tm: is a proxy for you, morally, as a person. And every issue needs to be broken into the language that sets the stances of Make You Good or Make You Bad.
And I don't mean this in any generic statement about echo chambers or virtue signaling. Those are separate but related concepts. What I'm talking about is how people are nervous about a topic until one doctrine is crafted which defines the Sports Team Color of our Sports Team, so we can be identified as being on the Us Sports Team, and absolutely not on the Them Sports Team. Because this issue is actually about you and the proxy for you as a person and how people should perceive you so, really, the sooner we figure out the Home Sports Team Colors the sooner you can stop feeling worried.
The moment something new happens is usually the first and last time you'll actually see a range of opinions on it. And some of that is fueled by misinformation! Some in bad faith! When dust settles and clarity is achieved, this helps combat those things, but it's also the moment when the Loudest and most Articulate voices craft the Zeitgeist Opinion and everyone comes to roost around it.
You get people on this site pissed off at AI models that can diagnose cancer from a research paper in 2019 because The Right Opinion is that AI is bad. If you even see a post trying to articulate good uses of AI, well that's someone wearing Packers colors at a Vikings home game, and if you wanna make a point in the "wrong" direction you better be damn articulate about it.
A well-defined set of actions are transphobic. Another set are actually not transphobic, and you'd be transphobic for thinking so. Are you trans and actually your lived experiences differ? Get articulate real fast or shut up. You might be able to eek an exception for yourself, but it's going to require a 10-paragraph post justifying your claim. If you're REALLY good at it though, you might be able to rewrite the Zeitgeist and now anyone who disagrees with you is transphobic. Teams switch uniform styles every now and then, after all.
And it's such a farce because so often it's not actually about the topic at hand. It's about why you should be allowed to be perceived as a good person while toeing outside the fringes of The Right Opinion, why you aren't actually quitting the faith or committing blasphemy or deserving of exile for going off the written word. Or if someone really IS trying to make it about the topic at hand, the ensuing slapfight in the comments needs to be about whether OP has sinned against the covenant.
It's not helpful.
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letoshepard · 10 months ago
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Just discovered that if you do split screen co-op on the ps4/5 for Stardew Valley, even if you are both logged into your PSN accounts, only the host will get the trophies. I am so fucking infuriated...!!!
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