#i'm not going to reply directly quite yet bc i don't yet feel like i have the tools to do so effectively

[faggotry-enjoyer]

there is SO MUCH bullshit going on at this university and i want to talk about it on here so bad but it's too specific to do so without coming dangerously close to full on doxxing myself

[tonydaddingham]

does aziraphale actually at any point agree to come back to heaven? even after the metatron offers to restore crowley? because take all the time you need doesn't sound like he agreed yet. the flashback cuts immediately after the ascension offer without looking at his reply. he dodges directly answering tell me you said no. crowley takes it as a foregone conclusion based on his evasions and reacts accordingly the metatron acts as though he's agreed to cut off his escape routes but i'm not conviced he actually ever did...

(2/2)

hi anon!!!✨ lots of things to talk about here!!!

okay first thing's first, something definitely feels off about the cuts in the metatron-aziraphale chinwag, and the way it's intersected with aziraphale telling crowley, there's no two ways about it. i do think to some degree there is something we are not seeing.

that being said, i think it could potentially be quite... cheap? narratively to have a Big Reveal of *gasp* we didn't see the whole conversation! now if that does happen, im absolutely sure i'll be proven wrong in that assessment, and it'll be great. however, i personally don't like it that much, insofar that i think it can sometimes reflect a poor opinion on audience intelligence (ie. i prefer to find out there were clues hidden in plain sight to about 95% of the 'Answer', you only had to look hard enough to work out what was going on, then maybe a surprise twist for the remaining 5% - rather than something be purposefully and entirely kept from the audience).

so for example, i felt this way about the gabriel/beelzebub storyline. what had happened to gabriel was hidden in plain sight - the fly, the box, the memories, the matchbox etc - but the little twist obviously being him and beez falling in love. beautiful, splendid!

but for there to be a Big Reveal that metatron made an overt or even thinly veiled threat against aziraphale and/or crowley? that feels a bit too Big to reconcile, imo, with the rest of the scene. there are definitely indicators, the more that ive rewatched the Final Fifteen with this perspective in mind, that aziraphale is scared, or uncertain. the way he looks out the window, his facial reaction to what crowley says to him (shaking head, looking confused, etc)...

but i don't think he's been threatened. i think he maybe feels threatened or has Worked Something Out, but i dont think metatron actually intimated any kind of threat (tbh, i felt like that was the whole point of metatron's behaviour in the Final Fifteen). as for whether aziraphale had accepted the offer though - i completely agree that i don't think he had made up his mind completely until a very Specific moment.

i do believe that aziraphale wants to change heaven, and do the good thing of making a difference; i think that its simultaneously very in-keeping with his core traits (and his character development up to this point has naturally led to this decision), but also a step forward in some aspects too - put simply, bc it would be a whole other meta and tbh a point ive talked about quite extensively from my recollection, i definitely think both of the boys needed to separate.

but as to specifically why aziraphale was so willing to make that difference; well, i think he realises that metratron is potentially dangerous. he's smarter than metatron has given him credit for, and aziraphale realises that whilst he may not know his motives for doing so, or what specifically metatron could do, i think he has put together a number of Clues that indicate that he and crowley might not be as safe in the bookshop as they thought they were (and i had to actually parse this out in a separate post, anon, bc i got so excited!!! your ask completely inspired it, so thank you!)

so with this potentially in mind, he leaves the bookshop (and not until possibly clocking this dirty look thrown at crowley, just for good measure):

and settled down across the road with metatron. metatron offers him the job, CUT, metatron gives (?) aziraphale the power to restore crowley, CUT. then aziraphale, as you said anon, starts to come back across to the bookshop, and tell crowley what happened. as you said, metatron's line indicates aziraphale has basically said, "well, i'll need to run it by him indoors first", and metatron has acquiesced, it seems.

so yeah, just to hammer home your point, i definitely think that aziraphale has said something like, "i need to think about it", for metatron's first line to make sense and for it to flow. and his expression, keeping with the kindly old man, indicates to me that he hasn't gone nasty or threatened him at all, but instead is almost taking the "kill them with kindness" approach, which is all the more powerful because it makes the victim, so to speak, arrive at the conclusion they wanted but by their own conviction.

anyway, so aziraphale is all smiley, until he crosses to the bookshop, and it's apprehensive and stiff and uncomfortable. i think this for me is a telling sign, because if he were expected crowley to want to be an angel again, and to be with him, what would aziraphale have to be nervous about? personally i think it's to do with the aforementioned potential realisation that whatever he says to crowley in the shop, he needs to be careful in what he says and how he says it.

as soon as he steps in the shop, it's back to smiles. nothing's wrong at all. in fact, i have good news. aziraphale is looking out the window just as metatron has turned from muriel to look right back. then, when crowley starts rambling (my brave soldier), you need to stop talking, i need to tell you this and i need to tell you this now before anything happens or you end up saying something and land us in deep shit, because i think he can hear everything we're saying (just chopped together a bunch of shit to demonstrate this):

and then aziraphale starts to lay out what the metatron has offered to him, even pulling himself up on potentially offending him by indicating that aziraphale and crowley both might have had a shitty word to say about him after the metatron's less than helpful rhetoric in s1:

im not going to go ahead and gif the rest, but the following notes through aziraphale's account of the conversation and the offer made to crowley:

aziraphale barely blinks after the above point in his monologue, and is definitely agitated and restless compared to when it cuts to the flashback of him and metatron at justine's restaurant

an obvious thing that everyone has remarked but; aziraphale first asserts that he doesn't want to go back to heaven, to which metatron plays the crowley restoration card

as soon as metatron says, "(paraphrased) looked back over your previous exploits with the demon crowley", and aziraphale goes from frozen, deer in headlights, to visibly uncomfortable and panicked - swallows, eyes start darting away (previous pretty firm eye contact with metatron), pursed lips... all indicating to me a mixture of 'oh he's definitely been watching us/has had the power to', and 'oh shit it's worse than i thought'

we don't see aziraphale's face after metatron finishes his offer of restoring crowley - did aziraphale continue to look scared? did he look relieved that a threat hasn't been made? does he even look relieved that metatron doesn't appear to be splitting them up, but instead is offering an option where they can still be together and protect each other? we don't know.

i do think aziraphale was taken in by the promotion; i do think he wants to do exactly as ive said in previous metas. i think he does want to make a difference, do the right thing. not the clever thing, or logical thing, but the right thing. the minisodes literally led to this point, directed us to this being the pinnacle of his character development so far.

i think he genuinely thought that the restoration offer would solve everything re: his and crowley's safety, and their future together - he acts truly shocked that crowley would turn it down. i don't think crowley has ever really told him about the fall, or why crowley is so vehemently repulsed by heaven and therefore by the offer by extension. aziraphale sees it as an overture made towards crowley, a way to set right an egregious wrong done to crowley, and - like the photograph in ep4 - a way that aziraphale, once again, can actually be the one out of the two of them to protect them both.

this to me is why the metatron's whole offer, start to finish, is so clever, and so dumb, and why it would be so gratuitous to even bother with an overt threat. it's clever because it plays into aziraphale's core beliefs and the tenets of his character - especially those that crowley taught him. it's dumb because there's so much that metatron got wrong, like the coffee, and only set off (imo) the alarm bells for aziraphale that things are Not What They Seem. but ultimately aziraphale arrives at the conclusion - especially post-Feral Domestic - that he has to go to heaven. metatron didn't need to threaten him; the decisions that you reach yourself rather than be coerced or ordered into are always the decisions that stick.

i think aziraphale knew he was going to go to heaven as soon as metatron offered it. i think he knew, however this was going to go, it would not be an option he couldn't take. the bit he didn't foresee, that he thought would be guaranteed, is that crowley would want to help him and be with him, not force him to go against his core self (the bit that wants to do good and do the right thing), and not put his faith and trust in aziraphale even if he could never again put it in heaven. im not saying aziraphale is right for thinking or assuming that - far from it - but that must be somewhat along the lines of how he thought this would go.

so essentially, anon, if you've stuck with me this far (bless you if you have, you're so brave), i do largely agree! and it's parsing out this ask that has made me seriously consider if i think that aziraphale knows he's in some sort of peril. i think he does - but i don't think the metatron knows that aziraphale knows. that's pretty powerful knowledge. the opening had been made, a declaration of intent has been made apparent, and now aziraphale needs to respond. i think aziraphale is going to need to play a very tough board here, consider where he moves his pieces, and start planning the middlegame as soon as he can - something, if you ask me, he's already doing:

[ihatealimore]

November 28th

Not Kurapika related but idc bc I'm so proud of this part. artwork done by @/raisinripe (word count: 2,336)

"Well..." Dusk starts, forcing an optimistic tone despite his defensive posture, "It's not your birthday anymore so you can't be mad," She holds out the gift, her gesture clear and earnest.

The package is simple but thoughtful, wrapped in dark blue paper with black satin ribbons twirled around it. For a moment, Xavia can only stare at the box, his mind going blank as he processes her words. A gift? For his birthday?

A wave of irritation surges within him and he scoffs in disbelief, "I don't need it," He grumbles stubbornly, backing away from her offering. He folds his arms tighter across his chest and glares at Dusk defiantly, "My birthday isn't fucking important."

Dusk huffs in frustration, refusing to take back the gift, "Too bad," She shoots back unflinchingly, her freckled face set in a determined frown, "Your birthday is important because you were born on it. And I'm glad you were."

Her declaration lingers heavily between them, a rare moment of unfiltered honesty amidst their usual banter that catches Xavia off guard. He looks at her in disbelief, his rugged features softening slightly under the sincerity of her gaze.

"Yeah, well," He finally manages to reply, his tone bitter and defensive as he averts his gaze, "Most people aren't."

Dusk chooses not to press him about his self-deprecating remark. Instead, she lets out a light chuckle, her mismatched eyes sparkling under the moonlight.

"Most people aren't me," She retorts playfully, her voice dropping to a more serious tone afterward, "And anyone who doesn't realize how important you are is an idiot."

Xavia's eyes flick back to her, stunned by her words. Her relentless optimism and kindness are disconcerting. It makes him uncomfortable in a way he can't quite describe.

"Fine," He concedes begrudgingly, snatching the gift from her hands without another word.

A relieved smile spreads across Dusk's face, "Thank you," She says softly, "And... I'm sorry," She adds after a moment of silence, her gaze lowering to the deck in embarrassment, "For pushing so hard earlier."

Xavia grunts noncommittally. He doesn't like apologies; they make him feel awkward and unsettled, "Just forget about it," He mutters, "It's not your fault."

She takes a deep breath, gathering her thoughts, then meets his gaze again, "Look, Xav, I know it probably doesn't mean much... But you can always talk to me," She pauses for a moment, then confidently adds, "I'll always be there for you. We're partners in crime."

Her support resonates with him in a way he hadn't expected. He scoffs lightly, shaking his head at her.

"Are you an idiot?" The question falls from his lips before he can stop himself, "Why the hell would that not mean much? You're... You're..." He trails off and clears his throat awkwardly, finally managing to grumble out, "You're my partner."

What Xavia had been on the verge of saying is that Dusk isn't just his partner. She is, in this moment, the most important person in his life. But acknowledging that fact out loud makes him feel vulnerable, a feeling he despises.

Dusk laughs lightly at his awkwardness, her heart fluttering with warmth, "I guess I am an idiot," She replies lightheartedly, "But at least I'm your idiot partner."

There's something about the way she stands under the moonlight, surrounded by water and with a gentle breeze tugging at her hair that Xavia finds breathtaking. He can't quite put his finger on it but he can't help but stare. The sight of Dusk like this is captivating, an ethereal presence that draws him in.

And yet, so often when they're together and Dusk turns to him with those warm, sincere eyes of hers, he finds himself unable to meet her gaze directly. It feels too intimate, as if looking into those mismatched eyes will reveal everything he's trying hard to keep hidden within himself.

Tonight is no different. He takes a deep, steadying breath, reluctantly lifts his hand, and points to the harsh scar that mars his cheek.

He watches her as her expression shifts, the joviality fading away to be replaced by a look of deep curiosity. She focuses on his scar and he feels an odd sort of satisfaction at having captured her attention so completely.

"This," He starts, hesitating for a brief moment before forcing himself to continue, "I got this scar on my 8th birthday."

Dusk's eyes widen at his confession, a sharp pang of sympathy striking her, "Xav..." She begins softly, struggling to find the right words. She hesitantly reaches out to touch the scar on his cheek.

Xavia tenses as her hand approaches. His eyes follow her movement, widening slightly when he realizes her intent. A mix of anticipation and apprehension fills him, an odd sensation that causes his breath to catch.

But then she hesitates, pulling back, uncertain if she should intrude, and leaving him gazing after her withdrawing hand with a sense of loss he can't fully comprehend. He swallows hard, trying to push past the lump forming in his throat.

Before he realizes what he's doing, Xavia reaches out and grabs her wrist. His fingers wrap around it, halting her from pulling away completely. He's not entirely sure why he did that, his body reacting on instinct while his mind is still trying to catch up.

"I..." He starts and then stops again, lost for words. He stammers as he struggles to find something - anything - appropriate to say.

Dusk freezes, surprise flashing across her face. She observes his struggle, a mix of concern and fondness washing over her, "Xav, it's okay," She reassures him, "You don't have to say anything."

The admission tumbles out of his mouth before he can stop it, "Yeah... Yeah, I do."

For once in his wretched life, Xavia finds himself desperately wanting to share; to unload the burden that has been weighing him down for far too long.

He carefully guides her hand to his scarred cheek, holding it there as a tangible connection between them. His cheeks flush with an emotion he doesn't fully understand and he quickly looks away from her penetrating gaze.

"It's from a sword," He manages after what feels like an eternity, "I misstepped during training and my father cut me," The confession is painful but liberating in a way Xavia hadn't expected, "It was an accident... But he didn't give a shit."

Dusk's expression shifts to one of realization as the pieces of a puzzle she didn't realize existed begin to fit together. The hallucinations he had spoken about during his hospital stay, his vehement hatred of swordplay... It all suddenly makes sense.

"You deserved better," She whispers hoarsely, a tinge of sorrow lacing her tone as she gently brushes her thumb against his scar.

His breath hitches at the sensation, a shiver running down his spine at the intimate gesture. It's not unpleasant, quite the opposite, in fact.

"No..." He shakes his head, voice rough with anguish, "I deserved exactly what I got," He adds, his words bitter and filled with self-loathing.

Her heart aches at his response, "No, Xav," She counters firmly, "Nobody deserves that kind of cruelty. Especially not you."

Xavia is ensnared by her gaze; there's a determination there, an unwavering belief that shakes him to his core.

"I..." He falters again. He wants to argue, but the retort dies on his lips. For some reason, he can't bring himself to counter her conviction.

Instead, he stays silent; adrift in the stormy sea of emotions swirling within him.

Her expression softens, yet her resolve remains unyielding, "You don't have to bear all your burdens alone, Xav," She reminds him gently, as she has before, "Your burdens are mine too... Because we're partners."

His grip tightens around her wrist, his face contorting in a grimace, "That's the fucking problem, Dusk!" He blurts out harshly, startling even himself with his abrupt outburst, "You... You don't deserve to be dragged down by the likes of me!" 

The regret is instantaneous and powerful, like a punch to his gut. He didn't mean to say that. It was supposed to stay buried deep inside him. The silence that follows is suffocating and Xavia wishes he could take it all back.

Hurt flashes through her eyes at his words, but she doesn't pull away, "You're not dragging me down, Xav," Dusk counters emphatically, "You could never drag me down because I want to stand by your side."

A whirlwind of turmoil threatens to consume him. The fact that she believes so strongly in him... It's something he has trouble comprehending.

"Dusk..." Her name falls from his lips in a whisper that's barely audible over the sound of crashing waves nearby, his grip on her wrist finally slackening.

He looks away from her piercing gaze, too afraid that if he keeps looking into those eyes filled with kindness and conviction, he might actually start believing in himself.

Ignoring his resistance, she gently turns his face back toward her with a soft tug, her fingers warm against the rough texture of the scar on his cheek, "Xav," She murmurs softly, "Please... Just let me in."

A shiver runs through Xavia at her soft plea. It's a vulnerability he isn't used to, one that scares the hell out of him.  

"Dammit, Dusk," His voice cracks, filled with an indecipherable mix of fear and yearning.

He takes a shaky exhale then, her touch and voice overwhelming him. The way she looks at him... It's like she sees someone worth fighting for. 

He's always avoided letting people in because he knows, from cruel experience, that trust is a dangerous thing. The more someone knows about you, the easier it is for them to hurt you; intentionally or otherwise.

He's no exception to his own rule. Xavia sees himself as a failure, not just because of the abandonment by his father but also due to the decisions he's made in life; stealing, lying, even killing. He wears these sins like a second skin.

To him, it's clear that he isn't a good person. He does what needs to be done without flinching and doesn't lose sleep over the consequences. A man with such darkness within him shouldn't even be around someone as bright and kindhearted as Dusk.

He knows Dusk works the same job, takes the same risks. She's no stranger to breaking laws and crossing lines. But there's a stark difference between them that he can't overlook - she actually feels regret. She cares for people in ways he never understands or has the capacity to do himself. He's seen her go out of her way to avoid killing, even if it makes their mission more difficult.

Despite his mixed feelings, Xavia finds himself unable to deny her request. The gentleness in her eyes is a contrast to the harshness of the world he knows. Her persistent patience and understanding toward him, even after all the bitterness and resentment he has shown her, is something he can't overlook. Her faith in him gives him hope, an alien feeling but one that makes him wonder if he can become someone worthy of the implicit trust she places in him.

Even if it means exposing his vulnerabilities, scars that run deeper than the visible ones, he owes her this much at least. He decides to cave in and take the leap of faith she's been asking for. His hand trembling slightly, he reaches up to place it over her own on his cheek.

"Alright, alright," He concedes softly, his walls crumbling down, "I'll try."

It's not easy for him. This admission feels like handing over a loaded gun. But it's Dusk... If there's anyone who can handle him with care and understanding, even at his worst, it's her.

A sigh of relief escapes her lips, "That's all I'm asking for... Thank you, Xav," She breathes out quietly, "I'm here for you. Always."

As her words sink in, Xavia feels a strange warmth spread through him. He's not used to this... This feeling of being cared for so deeply by someone other than his mother. 

He watches as she smiles at him, an expression full of nothing but genuine care and relief, and he realizes that he doesn't want to lose it. Doesn't want to lose her.

"Yeah..." He mumbles almost inaudibly, swallowing thickly around the lump forming in his throat, "I know."

In the quiet that follows, Dusk simply watches Xavia, her eyes soft with understanding. There's an unspoken agreement between them, a bridge of trust and shared vulnerability they've crossed together.

She spots the unopened gift still held in his free hand. Removing her hand from his face, she playfully nudges him with her elbow to lighten the mood, saying, "Open it."

Inside is an antique brass compass that she found at a thrift store earlier that day; its surface is weathered but still reflects a subtle shine, "To find your way back," Dusk murmurs as he examines the engravings on its lid, her fingers tracing over the etchings.

He stares at the compass in his hand, the cool metal seeping through his skin and resonating deep within him. It feels... Significant somehow. The aged brass gleams under the soft moonlight, a beacon guiding him home.

He watches Dusk's fingers as they trace over the words, her touch anchoring him in the moment.

"Thanks..." His voice is hoarse, laden with emotions. He closes his hand around it as if gripping a lifeline, "And... Not just for the gift," He adds quietly, his words nearly swallowed by the sound of waves lapping against their boat.

"You're welcome, Xav," She responds in a hushed tone, her gaze shifting to the night sky.

With a soft click, Xavia flips open the compass. His eyes widen in surprise as he watches the needle swing wildly for a moment before it settles on pointing north - directly at Dusk.

"Huh," He mumbles under his breath, an amused smirk tugging at the corners of his lips despite himself, "Guess it works."

[infernalight]

Alright, after the shitty week I had, I can now get back to my schedule. I'm hoping to get to replies, but considering I might have to find a new place to live and the anxiety that comes from that is so real, it might be another week yet... But within the next week I am going to try to get back on (though I might only be active on the weekends bc of work)

In the meantime, if you RP as any of the following characters and would like to join a discord RP server for Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss, please feel free to check us out @futureofhell or message me directly.

We are looking for quite a bit of characters, but the ones we want to see the most are: Beelzebub, Blitz, Carmilla, Cherri, Emily, Glam, Glitz, Lilith, Mammon, Molly, Niffty, Sera, Sir Pentious, Sallie May, Stella, Stolas, Striker, Vaggie, Vortex

If you don't want to join, that's not a problem, but it'd be appreciated if you could spread the word or reblog our promo!

[convexicalcrow]

Hello! Loved your Sir Cub fic, any ideas you had about him and Wizard Scar that didn't make it to the final cut? These two committing crimes together are my everything.

Thank you for replying.

Oh thank you! :D I loved that fic and I'm glad you did too! <3

So, the original plot I was going to write was to have Scar aimlessly looking for Sir Cub in the woods, getting scared off, and making his way back to town but failing to get there. Sir Cub was going to find him on his way to the tournament the next morning, but they weren't going to be friends at that point. It was more, please help me get out of the woods, and Sir Cub leads him back to the town.

I was actually going to include the tournament too! I was gonna have Sir Cub decide to get a lil cocky about the magic crystals and try to one-up Scar by showing him a real magic crystal and having that distract Scar so much his own magic to protect whoever he was protecting ineffectual, leading to Sir Cub winning yet again.

Cue Scar coming up to him afterwards, begging to know his secrets bc he's seen how powerful his magic is, and I wanted that to be the point where they sort of started bonding and decide to travel together.

Grian and perhaps another Hermit or two might have also had proper roles as knights in the tournament as well. But without that, we just get nondescript Grian defending Scar in a tavern rip. Sorry G. it didn't work out this time.

In the end, though, I decided that was a little too complicated to write, and kind of unnecessary? Also I kind of didn't want to write another seven thousand words of tournament when there were other ways to achieve the same thing. Like instead of having Scar see Sir Cub's magic so directly, Scar can see it, but not know the source, and I can explore Cub's shapeshifting powers in a more interesting way.

Also, incidentally, in my original plan, it was Sir Cub's horse who was going to transform into a bear, as it was intended to be representative of his Masters as a guardian or watcher-type figure who kept him in line. But I dropped that idea and just made it be Sir Cub bc that felt both easier to write and more plausible.

And I think this way actually dug a little deeper into why Scar hung around scamming people with crystals for so long that I'm not sure the original ending would have reached as easily. They're both scammers in the end, they just use different methods.

Plus, I think this way helps to reinforce Sir Cub's sense of keeping to himself a lot more. If he'd been so open with his magic to Scar, I feel it wouldn't have quite worked or had the same impact. Sir Cub hides. He wanders. He belongs to no one. He can make people forget they've seen him. This is not the behaviour of a man who would simply show off his magic to another magician just to distract him. Showing his hand so visibly would not be to his advantage. He prefers to keep his powers to himself.

Hence, the ending I did end up writing, where Scar is much more in the dark about Sir Cub's magical abilities. bc Sir Cub doesn't trust him yet. When he does, then he'll be more open with his magic, but until then, it's not something he shows off.

If I regret one thing about not including the tournament, it's that I didn't get to show Sir Cub having actual fighting skills. bc I never wanted him to just be a con artist with the banners; I wanted them to enhance his own skills and talents. Without the skill to succeed, he would have been caught by now. But the story didn't have room for that in the end.

Sir Cub and Scar are both very powerful and talented in their own right, they just don't show it for personal or situational reasons. So it's not as obvious. Sir Cub doesn't need the banners to win; it's just more fun that way. Scar doesn't need to sell magic crystals to unsuspecting knights, but that's what they want him for, not for the actual magic he can actually perform. So he goes along with it and yearns to be able to spread his wings and be a proper wizard.

In that way, they are so right for each other once they figure out they're looking for similar things, to not be tied down to one place, to adventure and seek new things, to serve no masters save for themselves.

I'm not sure I ever had much of a solid idea for Sir Cub's Masters either save for them being kind of like the Vex but also not the Vex. Spiritual beings that direct and control him, who he obeys without question. If I had more planned for this AU, maybe I'd have thought more about that, but as this was very much an adlibbed piece, it is what it is, and Sir Cub's Masters don't need or require more than to be a narrative device, and I think I'm okay with that.

[jemmo]

Just wanted to let you know your bad buddy tags always get me so emotional particularly your thoughts on Pran. He is my son and I'm sad his feelings are kinda misunderstood by people in the fandom because he focuses on more than Pat's feelings. Wanting to call his mom simply because he was worried she would be lonely and worried without him told me everything I needed to know about Pran because contrary to what a lot of others seem to have read from it, I just thought it showed his thoughtfulness and kindness? I imagine he must've been under a lot stress and feeling conflicted juggling not only his and Pat's happiness but also everyone else's. I think at the end of the day he just wants to keep the peace and keep everyone happy irregardless of his own wants and needs and I think that's both heartbreaking but also sweet. Or maybe I'm reading it wrong? I don't know.

maybe its kinda good that im lazy with replying to my anons bc reading this after ep 12 is quite interesting. i so agree with what you said anon. i havent exactly seen a lot of people misunderstanding pran but i definitely see how he could be misunderstood. and its not just in ep 11, its throughout the series, especially ep 6 onwards. even before then, you can see how pran's tendency to close off from pat, to put him at arms length and isolate himself from him affects pat. you see pat constantly constantly seeking pran's time and attention only to be shut out. pran cant consciously let himself be around pat. most of the scenes with them together pre-ep7 come about bc pat seeks pran out, and pran is only able to spend time with pat when he's not thinking, be it him getting swept up by pat's goofiness or arguing with him or doing something together, you see pran's brain switch off. he relaxes, goes with the flow, drops some of those boundaries as pat worms his way in before they rebuild themselves in full force and shove him out. and every encounter goes a little bit further, they get a little bit closer, a little bit more serious or honest, only for pran to catch himself and abort. and despite being in pran's pov, its not difficult to imagine how this hurts pat, especially in retrospect knowing what we know now about pat's loneliness and how he adversely responds to being called a jinx or a curse, how he hates carrying blame that he shouldn't have to but takes on anyway, the unconscious guilt bubbling underneath the surface and how that affects the way he is with pran.

(this is kinda off topic from the question but as i wrote that i realised i've never really considered the complexities of that before. how pat's guilt could make him feel so contentious about wanting to spend time with pran. bc he gravitates towards pran like nothing else, and yet doesn't realise his feelings for him until ep 5 when romance is directly brought up in his own life. so before that, was there an element of wanting to be around pran bc of his guilt?? bc he feels bad and therefore wants to repay him by doing these good things. we know what their real meaning are, but pat's guilt i similarly buried like his romantic feelings, and they unconciously affect his actions, so its not a stretch to say that his unaddressed guilt does too. but at the same time, he has to know that the reason he feels guilty, the reason why he hurt pran was bc he spent time with him. simply being around him put pran in trouble, so now, when he seeks out pran, i wonder does that make him feel uneasy. like how at odds must it make him feel knowing that he's caused pran trouble by being his friend, yet all he wants in the world is to be his friend. something he desires so fundamentally has been proven to be a bad thing, so how does he reconcile with that?? when he's been the one to make pran sad, how can he also go about wanting to be the person to make pran smile?? idk i just feel like there's real complexity to pat reconciling his guilt with wanting to be around pran, and for emotionally 'simple' pat, i feel like its a lot)

(also editing jess im putting a read more here purely so i dont clog ppls dashs with my messy rant but pls go on ahead)

but anyway back on topic, when pat recognises and vocalises his feelings in ep 5, the way pran's reflex to push pat away hurts pat is a lot more obvious, in that you come to realise that a level of hurt has been there all along but now, similarly to how he has identified his feelings, he's identified why that rejection hurts, and its brought to the surface for us to see. i said this before around when these eps were airing and i'll say it again, i love this about pran. i love that he has this flaw, that he selfishly disregards pat's feelings for his own safety, even tho it's not exactly a good safety, its more a fear of change and need to maintain peace and the status quo. and now in retrospect, i love even more how it reflects dissaya's handling of her situation with ming. bc just as she held onto her feelings of anger and need for revenge as a way to not address the hurt and betrayl, and subsequently passed that hurt onto other people, pran is doing exactly the same with pat. he's still struggling, but he's avoiding facing some difficult emotions, avoiding addressing the big elephant in the room so that he doesn't have to reconcile with it. and in the same way the hurt of dissaya is passed to pran, pran's hurt is passed to pat. he's made to feel uncomfortable and unhappy and just has to accept things are this way, go at pran's place, all so that pran doesn't have to face reality.

its honestly a great mirroring of mother and son, the difference being that pran is in this with pat. pran didn't stand up to his mother and make her face what she's doing, but pat does that with pran. he does so immediately and consistently and unforgivingly. he chases and pursues and tells him in no few words that he is struggling and he can't handle being in this emotional place pran has put him in. dissaya is allowed to live in her constructed safety but pran isn't, pat smashes down those walls and calls him out, won't let him stay in that unaffected, unfeeling bubble. and for him, its both out of selfishness for his own feelings but also bc he knows thats ultimately not a good place for pran to be. that remaining in perceived peace is only gonna be stagnant and dull and draining for pran. its only gonna limit him to the life he's already accepted. pat doesn't want that, he wants more, for both of them, so he seizes it.

again, that was a bit of a tangent, but getting finally to ep 11, i wanna take this chance to hone in on one of my favourite lines pran has ever said that i dont think i've really seen ppl talk about. its when he's talking to junior's mom and she says 'i even wanted to be a pirate. luckily my mom didn't allow it. otherwise i'd be throwing a net for a living'. and pran simply replies 'or you'd become a famous pirate'. i love this line more than i can say bc it says so much about pran as a person and his relationship with his mother. i remember using this phrase in a post before; pran is a dreamer forced to be a realist. you can see it in the things he's drawn to, music and design, he clearly has an artistic soul that must be very at odds with the person he’s been shaped to be, someone realistic thats constantly being made to face the facts of this world, and being told they’re unfair and unforgiving and hence he must work and fight and be successful to find his place, all things dissaya puts on him bc she went through something so unjust. and the thing is, i said something similar in some tags about pat yesterday that i’ll put here.

i see this for pran too, in that his mother has engrained a competitiveness and need for success into him that i think if she hadn’t, wouldn’t be absent from his personality. its just a part of him. and we can see that bc his eyes light up at any kind of challenge from pat even when it has no stakes, he just likes to compete, even more so now when its in such a happy and relaxed context. and we see it with him at uni. in ep 1, his mom isnt forcing him into anything, in fact they’re concerned he’s taking on too much responsibility with the class president role. but he does it anyway, much like he plays on the faculty rugby team, much like he takes on the bus stop project, much like he takes on a job for the play. i see people saying that many of these things were forced on him by wai and that kinda frames pran as someone that never had drive or a want to do stuff and succeed. people make out that his mom and wai expect him to be that person. but i dont see it that way. i see pran as someone who has a lot of drive, and has an innate desire for success in life, someone who wants to conquer and do stuff, live very involved and fully. i mean he goes abroad to work of his own volition for god sake, he has grand aims. and i love this about him bc it would’ve been so easy to have him be the shy boy with no friends. but he’s not. and he’s not dampened and depressed and weighed down by his unrequited crush either as would’ve been easy. he lives. even in high school he joins the band, and in uni he’s very involved with extra circular stuff. he’s clearly outgoing and personable. but there’s also been a very fine line he’s had to tread here, whereby he wants to be successful and good at things and so does his mom, but his mom also doesn’t want him to have high hopes or spend time investing in something that isnt a sure thing, like music (but also i think she takes that away from him bc its something that tethers him to pat), so he has to reconcile his desire for success while still quashing his dreams. he can want big things but only if they’re the right big things. he can dream big but not too big. 

idk again i feel like there’s a lot of complexity there. so when pran says ‘you could’ve been a famous pirate’, its saying a lot. its saying that your parents dont always know whats best, that there’s something limiting in never trying to reach for your dream bc you’ll never know if it was actually possible to accomplish, that its redundant to ask children to have dreams and aspirations when later down the road they’ll only be seen as stupid and childish. pran says he wants to be a musician, and i could’ve seen this being something he actively pursued more than architecture. and its not a lie that he enjoys what he studies too, its not that his job now is unfulfilling, its just that, given the chance, he could’ve tried, but his mother never let him. music became off limits and now he’ll never know if he could’ve ‘become a famous pirate’. but still, that doesn’t stop him from playing for himself, and for pat, and finding joy in it. his love for music never dulled. bc some kids have dreams that aren’t stupid even if you think they are. some kids have big aspirations not out of childish innocence to how difficult the world is, but bc of innate passion that outlives innocence, and stays a passion even when they know its hard. some things stick, and pran might not be a famous pirate, but he can still play pirates with pat and have fun as if they were kids all over again. 

(side note but this is one of my tiny gripes with the show. not a criticism bc i understand why its the way it is, but i would’ve loved to have known what pat would’ve been interested in, studied, done as a job if it wasn’t for his father. i feel like dissaya was a lot more relaxed in this sense, as in pran didnt need to take after her, she just wanted him to be successful and choose a path that was a sure thing, that was safe and reliable career wise, and as long as he succeeded in that it was ok. but ming clearly wants pat to follow in his footsteps. they play the same sport, study the same major, do the same job. its a path predetermined for him since birth. pran was both given more space interest wise but also i feel saw that his mother wasnt always right a lot earlier, and that enabled him to explore his passions. pat tho, he was set from an early age, and made to idolise his father such that he never entertained anything outside of what he was prescribed. he never thought about what he liked to do or what he was interested in bc it was all set for him. so i’d love to know what, given the freedom, he’d find his passion to be (possible s2 plotline anyone??))

im sorry so much of this is off question but im kinda rambling and going with the flow here, i just have a lot of thoughts. and in regards to that aside about pat and his own dreams, i think that plays in to how things go down in ep 11. bc the only way pat has defied his father is by being with pran, everything else is what his father wants. pran on the other hand wants to and has before defied his mother in multiple ways ie with music. and what i said about him having more freedom in regards to his life choices, he has a much larger world view than pat bc he’s been able to construct more of it himself. even without pat in it, pran still has other things he loves and cares about, namely family, career and passions. pat has not been allowed to find any of his own passions, isnt allowed to forge his own career and his connection to his family has just been broken. he has pa and his mom, and his friends, but they’re all so closely linked to his father and the life that hes set out for him that by severing the connection he had with his father, all those other things are too difficult to think about. so his world view is tiny, his world view is just pran. thats why he wants to run away for good, thats why he entertains that idea, bc in the height of his emotions he doesnt think he has anything he wants to go back to. hes completely happy with starting fresh and living a simple life here. pran isnt. pran’s relationship with his mother has not been completely broken, he still empathises with her as a victim. and he has all his own goals, goals that cant be realised by running away and living here with pat. 

and also ever the realist, he knows its not possible logistically. fairy tales aren’t realistic. they’d have to work their asses off and wouldnt have any of the comforts and amenities theyre used to in their middle class city lives. the days would be repetitive and mundane and the novelty of being able to be together would slowly wear off and they’d just feel stuck. pran would always be quashed and limited in this life. and its not selfish of him to want more, and its not weak of him to want to return, and it doesnt mean his love for pat is any less. he just sees the bigger picture where pat’s anger has given him absolute tunnel vision. and as you said, pran is more predisposed to be kind to his mother bc she was wronged. despite her poor handling of her pain, he still cares for her and empathises with her being hurt, and so wants to be caring, worries about her, wants to make sure she’s ok. pran has had a lot more time to sit with the knowledge that his parents arent always right so he isn’t charged with anger and a want to rebel. maybe he was once, but he’s had those feelings long enough for them to soften. what he is feeling for the first time is all the empathy for his mother’s hurt, thats whats fresh and new, so thats what he feels more strongly vs pat’s newly unleashed anger and disappointment. 

the only thing i’d slightly disagree with is pran keeping the peace irregardless of his own wants and needs. maybe he did in earlier episodes, but now i think knowing how they dealt with things in ep 12, it shows he’s more concerned with keeping a veneer and facade of peace while still getting what he wants. he’s found a middle ground where he can have it all in measured amounts instead of going all in on one thing. he gets the career, he gets music, he gets family, he gets pat. he’s decided that for him, having all the things he wants is better than only having one thing he wants in the exact way he wants it. the career might not be his dream, music is still something he keeps private, he still has to lie to his parents and he still has to keep his relationship with pat a secret. none of these are ideal, but for a lot of people having it all is better than having it perfect. and in fact, learning to find happiness through non-ideal situations has given him better results than having one thing fully and having happiness the way he wants but only in that limited aspect. no matter what, there’s always gonna be what ifs, there’s always gonna be if onlys, but one thing that no one can take away from pran now is his ability to decide for himself. he plots his own path and finds happiness in it. his life is no longer being lead, he’s leading it. and he chooses to lead it by being the kindest he can to everyone, bc thats the pran i know and love. the one that cares with actions more than words, and will always look for the good in people. thats why i love him.

(sorry i wrote a whole ass essay anon. you said you enjoyed my takes on pran so heres a whole ass heap of them. i clearly have a lot of untapped feelings about these boys still and as soon as im given a question and a vessel through which to unleash all my thoughts, i just cant stop. so yeah, ugh, hope you enjoy this mess)

[meetmeatthecoda]

Lately, I've found myself drawn to stories ( and I mean drawn to as in envisioning those stories in my head, thinking them through to the very last detail, not reading, let alone writing them down, because I've long since accepted that they will never turn out quite the same on the paper ) where Red is the one who'd been seriously hurt and, therefore, rendered unconscious for an indefinite amount of time and worried Liz is the one who doesn't leave his side, hoping and praying and pleading that he would wake up. Probably, something that has to do with how unfair it is that we've seen Red keep vigil by hurt!Lizzy's side – playing music for her, holding her hand, reading to her etc. – a number of times and yet, over the course of 8 seasons, never have ever been allowed the pleasure of seeing Liz do the same for him ( not even when he was shot – because she left to retrieve the Fulcrum and couldn't come back until the fight was over – or when he was poisoned – because she'd been waiting to be cleared to see him and he ran away the moment he wasn't actively dying, because that's Red for you all ), even though she loves and cares about him as much as he loves and cares about her.

I mean, just imagine the possibilities!

Liz pacing around the waiting area of Red's mobile hospital while he's in surgery, unable to think about anything else other than how he looked – battered and broken and barely alive – when they've found him and how his head rested in her lap ( she could almost convince herself that he was merely dozing, if he wasn't so deathly pale and still and there wasn't so much blood on his clothes and her clothes and her hands and the backseat of the car ) and his hand was limp in her death grip as they rushed him to his doctors and she whispered words of reassurance and encouragement to him even though she knew he couldn't hear her and how she had to fight the instinct to curl around her lover and snarl at anyone who would come close because she can't let him be hurt further as the medics took him away from her, exchanging observations and orders that didn't sound particularly reassuring. She's also acutely aware of the fact that Red is fighting for his life – there, just a few feet away from her – and, though he's the strongest man she's ever known, he may not win, and so she makes a promise to the empty air in front of her that she will kill him herself if he dares to give up on her and Agnes like that now, when they've just reached the good, right place in their relationship, just confesses their feelings to each other. At some point, Dembe most certainly pulls Liz in for a hug, letting her cry in his shoulder, doing his best to comfort her ( even though there's nothing that can bring her more comfort than Red's hug, when he – alive and whole – wraps his arms protectively around her and holds her close and lets her hide from the whole world in his arms, his chest, his shoulder and neck – wherever she prefers to burrow her face at the time – and the memory itself makes her cry harder, because there's a possibility that he will never hug her like that again ), even though he's just as worried and scared as she is, and Mr Kaplan helps Liz clean up, washing away Red's blood from her hands and producing seemingly out of the thin air fresh clothes for her to change into.

Red, of course, pulls through the surgery, beating all odds, and Liz's heart floods with relief at the good news before sinking when the doctor explains to her and Dembe and Mr Kaplan the extent of Red's injuries and that it's impossible to say when – or even if – he wakes up.

And so the waiting game begins. Liz doesn't leave Red's side, holding his hand, stroking his knuckles with her thumb and never letting go, constantly talking to him and reading to him and even asking Dembe to bring the record player and some records from the Bethesda apartment to play to him, hoping that it would elicit some kind of response from him. Yet, as they days go by, there's not a single, smallest sign that he's aware of anything that's going on around him, that he's still there somewhere and is trying to find his way back to her, to them – he doesn't stir, doesn't so much as flutter his eyelashes, and Liz grows more desperate with each passing day, even though the doctor assures her that Red's slowly but surely improving ( but she can't see it with her own eyes, and if she can't see it, she's less likely to believe it, the more time passes with him just lying there, undisturbed by the loud, chaotic world around him ).

And then there's Agnes... While Liz keeps vigil at Red's bedside, the babysitting duties are split equally between Aram and Samar, Charlene and Cooper, Ressler and Audrey and Dembe and Mr Kaplan. Yet more often than not whoever picks little Agnes up from school and / or her ballet classes brings her over to the safe-house where Liz and Red are. She doesn't seem to be as unnerved by Red's state as her mommy is, climbing on his bed each time she visits ( after giving her mommy the biggest hug, of course ) and leaning in close to him, examining his face thoughtfully before half-asking, half-stating "He's still tired, mommy?". And Liz usually replies with a hoarse "Yes, baby" because she doesn't trust herself not to get choked up if she tries to answer more eloquently. Agnes simply nods then, satisfied with the explanation why he hasn't woken up yet, and settles against Red's side – mindful of his injuries and the spider web of wires and tubes connecting him to all sorts of monitors and machines – and either naps ( especially, on ballet classes days ) or tells her mommy and Red ( she talks to him just like Liz does much too easily – promising him to show him the new moves she's learnt when he wakes up etc. – as if she's already done that before or seen anyone else do that... unbeknownst to Liz, she did both – when Liz herself was in a coma, Agnes both saw Red talk to her mommy and was encouraged by him to talk to her, too, because it may help her mommy sleep easier and maybe she'll get better sooner and finally wake up ) about her day or does her homework or draws ( more often than not, she draws either cards for Red to read when he wakes up or just things she wants him to see ). And when the time comes for her to leave, she always kisses Red on the cheek, wishing him "sweet dreams" and to get better soon, and then gives her mommy, who tries so very hard not to tear up but fails miserably, a hug and a kiss, too, and tells her frequently that she shouldn't cry because Red is just too tired, just like she – Liz – once was, and that he just needs to sleep a bit more.

And when the door behind Agnes closes and Liz is sure her daughter won't see / hear her, she breaks down hard, in big, ugly sobs, because her little girl shouldn't be acting so naturally in this kind of situation and because she wishes so hard that Red just woke up, because she can't do this, any of this, without him.

In the end, once his body has healed itself enough and he regained enough of his strength, Red, of course, does wake up. It's a slow process, and Liz thinks she might either faint or go mad from the overwhelming feelings that are swirling inside of her when Red moves for the first time in what seems to her like forever – squeezing her hand feather-lightly – and when he leans slightly, unconsciously into her touch when she strokes his cheek – out of habit, without even expecting any sort of reaction from him and being pleasantly surprised – and when he opens his eyes for the first time – it's a brief occurrence, with his eyes slipping shut tiredly again after just a few moments, and he's still pretty much out of it, apparently, not even noticing her presence by his side, but for Liz it's a major event – and when he finally, finally looks directly at her – alive and conscious and alert – and calls her "Lizzy". He's still weak and his voice sounds terrible and Liz knows she shouldn't let all of her pent-up feelings – the fear and despair and frustration and love and relief and exhaustion – out on him like that – he's just woken up, after all – but she can't hold back the tears nor the jumbled mess of "thank you"s and "I love you"s and " "I've missed you"s and "I'm so so happy you're back" and "I was so worried" and "Don't ever scare me like that again" that spills from her lips as she leans in to kiss him lightly and give him the gentlest of hugs...

(Since I'm not a ficwriter and, therefore, have no intentions of using this pile of ideas/images/feelings myself, I wouldn't mind at all if you or any other writer drew inspiration from this rambling of mine)

Ahhhhh 😭😭😭 Are you sure you're not a fic writer, anon?? Cause this reads like some quality hurt/comfort to me!! 🥲🥲 Honestly, this is a lovely scenario to imagine & it gives me a slightly bitter sense of satisfaction to think of Liz suffering through just a fraction of the time Red spent by her side while she was in her coma... especially if it's the catalyst for fEeLiNgS to emerge tee hee bc, you're RIGHT, we were woefully deprived of those situations in the show & I'll never not be sad about it tbh. More specifically, things I love the most about this in no particular order: Liz having to "fight the instinct to curl around her lover & snarl" *swoon*, Liz swearing she will kill him herself if he dies LMAO, Dembe hugging her for comfort & Mr. Kaplan helping her get cleaned up 🥺🥺🥺, Liz playing records for Red yasss, AGNES & everyone taking turns babysitting her while she misses her Daddy desperately but deals with the situation with a maturity & grace beyond her years in an effort to help her grieving Mommy through it cool cool mkay mkay, Liz only breaking down once Agnes leaves OWWW, anddddd Liz being a blubbering mess when Red finally wakes up & calls her "Lizzie" & they kiss *whispers* it's fine, i'm fine 🙃 IN CONCLUSION, I love this anon, thank you for sharing this lovely little AU with me!! 🥰 And much, much love to you, of course, my friend!! ❤️

[disaster-j]

HOW ARE WE FEELING oh my fucking god. This was like. An amazing episode holy fuckkkkk. First we got like pangwave sharing earphones and :((((( wave is legit the best like OMG WE ARE PRISONERS ARE U NOT ALLOWING ME TO PEE WTF i hated punn for the first part and then now i love him wtf??????? and claire doesnt like him anymore oh no punn is probably going to cry and also everyone leaving pang was heartbreaking as always and i SCREAMED when chanon came ALSO CHANON DROVE THEM TO POM U KNOW [1/?]

WHAT THAT MEANSSSSS but then pom and supot are fucking cowards i hate them i hate them everything was going so well oh and im so glad that pang didnt mind control holy shit!!!!! Ik im scrambling all over holy hell omg i still dk what happened w the ministry and shit and also yeah wtf was that egg ad again what. Also i love time grace and third a lot!!!!!! And i think that was all ok wow i cant

afagahsvhwhs im sorry I took a whole week to reply😭 I didnt mean to ignore you I swear! When I saw the ask I was still processing so I thought I'd answer it later except then I just forgot like I forget everything not directly in front of me😔 Sorry!!!!

So, by now you'll likely have watched the new episode but know that I haven't and probably won't tonight cause I have some stuff to do rn. So imma just talk about what I thought was going on this past week and you can tell me if I'm right?

1. WE ARE FEELING TIRED AND MAD while the writing on this show is amazing, being a Punn stan is HARD rn my child is hurting and no one cares enough to do anything about it😭

2. Goddam the pangwave in that episode was so amazing! That earphone scene agsyhshw if that's not a sign they're endgame then WHAT ISSSS!?!? Also, yes, Wave is so incredible this season every scene with him is a blessing.

3. I ca totally understand not liking Punn rn. I feel that way about Mon what with her constantly ignoring the fact that Korn tried to mass murder a bunch of children and only caring about him and his wellbeing and nothing else but yeah Punn! I don't like him siding with the ministry any more than the next person but I can understand why he did it. Rn he's feeling betrayed and is isolating himself. He's at his most vulnerable and Darin has been using it as an opportunity to manipulate him into doing her bidding. We've seen how she's been using her relationship with his family to get him to trust her since she showed up and bc of Korn's betrayal she was finally able to accomplish that. Punn is only siding with her bc he wants things to be better and he doesn't want to be at war anymore. He's a kid, that's a perfectly valid thing to want. But ultimately, it's not his choice. They're at war either way and he chose the side he thought would do the most good, not realising that neither side outweighs the other in terms of evil shit they're willing to pull. So yeah, I love him and as always I am hella worried for my boy.

4. It sucked so much seeing everyone leave Pang but I can't say I didn't see it coming. He'd lost their trust a while ago and so far he hasn't done anything that would help get it back. Even Wave has his reservations about Pang right now, despite him being the only one to stick around I don't think he fully trust Pang like he used to. Not to say he thinks Pang is using him or doing something bad, but just that he doesn't quite believe in Pang's leadership the way he used to. At least that's what I've gotten so far.

5. CHANON! AND! POM! How dare they bring those two so close and yet not let them meet wtf is up with that!?!? There's some big reveal coming for Chanon x Pom I just know it. I swear when Pom was trying to take the vials from them I was so sure Chanon would walk in and stop him but then nothing? Fucking? Happened??? I was so confused. How did he really just drop em off at the gate and just? Left???? Wtf?!?!? I hope they shed some light on that in today's episode and if they didn't imma riot. I'm tireeeeed this show is tiring me when will it end so I can write my cutesy au about Punn and his alters, one of whom is Rome who falls in love with Bright ugh I just wanna write the cute fics I wanna be done with this stress😭

6. I get why like we DO NOT want him becoming Supot 2.0 which is very likely to happen if he let's the power get to his head. But him not using at all even in crucial moments like that just gives me major Todoroki from Spirts Festival Arc vibes and I just wanna be Izuku and scream "IT'S YOUR POWER" like just use it for good instead of evil man!!! Lives are at stake!!!!!

7. What is the egg girl why is the egg girl i dont get why they are doing this to me how far are they gonna take this nonsense i have so many questions ugh but hey maybe if we all collectively ignore her existence it will go away?

8. I love the babies! Ngl I thought they were annoying episode one but now they are my new children and I love them and shall protect them with my life no one better hurt the children or I will riot!!!! Especially Time, no one touch Time, only happy moments for baby!!!!

That's it, that's all I've got, please tell me we get some real answers this episode? Or, better yet, Punn gets far away from Darin and actually talks to his alters instead of acting like they don't exist??