#i'm not bi but i believe in their beliefs

[curiousobsession101]

i grew up in a family where lgbtqia+ stuff wasn't usually brought up when i was a kid, not in a "don't ask don't tell" way but because it was just... normal. saying "this person is gay" would be like saying "this person likes green tea" like why would you mention that when it wasn't specifically relevant? so i never heard "your second cousin is gay" it was always "we're going to visit your second cousin and his husband and they made peanut butter cookies!"

so the first time i heard of being "gay" in anything other than the archaic sense where it meant "happy" was when i was in school - i think first grade? and my immediate response was utter absolute bafflement: "what do you mean gender is relevant to romantic relationships?? why would someone be interested in only girls or boys - how could that possibly matter? there's literally nothing that's only ever true for one of those but not the other so what's the difference?"

since then i've gotten to the point of academically understanding that this is a thing that matters to people and they can't help it and it's arbitrary. i've gotten involved with the queer community and for a while one of my hobbies was making little ms paint designs based on different pride flags for people. but on a gut level i still don't really get it.

needless to say, i'm aromantic and asexual

(also the fact that my mother is bi probably didn't help me understand people who aren't XD but for the record what i said here is true for my whole family - specific sexuality labels usually just come up when talking about politics so that's why i never heard about it when i was little. my great grandfather was a local politician so my mother once went to him for advice on a certain political issue and this was when prop 8 (an anti-gay bill) was being voted on and he made her promise to vote no on it before he would give her any advice - she told me she felt insulted he thought it was even remotely possible she'd vote yes)

so strange to me that some people aren't bisexual

[not-gray-politics]

Hey I'm just gonna say it. A lot of you in the sapphic community have "terfs dni" in your bio while repeating terf rhetoric that keeps trans men in the closet and bi women ashamed. And you need to reflect on that.

There is no "men are inherently biologically bad" argument you can make that doesn't lend itself to terf rhetoric and misogyny. Adding a "but like, trans girls don't count ☆" or "except the gays ♡" or "except my transmasc boyfriend [I'm going to subtly or unsubtly imply he doesn't count as a real man whether I realize it or not]" does not suddenly make it a progressive argument. [Especially you fuckers who adapt it to mean "actually all trans women are good and pure and innocent and all trans men are dirty evil misogynists just like cis men". You are doing active damage to the trans community. You are not an ally. You're doing toxic gender roles. Fuck off.]

Bioessentialism will never serve the queer community. I don't care if you make minor adaptations to it to make it seem nicer and less bigoted. It will always serve to harm trans people, divide people into a binary, and maintain misogynistic ideas that men are inherently evil and therefore can't be held responsible for their actions, that women have to take the responsibility for "protecting themselves" instead of believing that men can and should change so that no one needs protecting.

It's a lack of belief in feminism's ability to meaningfully change or solve anything and I'm tired of everyone acting like it's not.

[aplpaca]

thinking about how I've seen OCD get talked about now, but haven't really seen many posts that actually explain what it is. And like, obviously people shouldn't get all their info about mental conditions from posts, but u can't deny that internet communities and stuff play a major role in people recognizing and putting names to their own experiences.

But like since the general public has like absolutely no idea of what OCD actually is (no thanks to popular media), and a lot of things I see talking about intrusive thoughts don't mention OCD (either bc they originated in OCD circles or bc intrusive thoughts aren't Exclusive to OCD or for some other reason), there should prob be more explanation put out on what OCD actually consists of.

Which is kinda hard in some ways, bc there are so many ways OCD can present in terms of what "themes" a person experiences, so someone talking about what their themes are might not ring a bell with someone who experiences different ones. But like, the core thing with OCD isn't the presence of certain themes, it's a specific pattern of spiraling thoughts and reactions.

Like. OCD is a mental condition/illness where people experience stressful, unwanted, repetitive thoughts. These are intrusive thoughts are what make up the "obsessions" part of the disorder. In response to these intrusive thoughts, a lot of people will perform certain actions or think certain things in an attempt to neutralize or disprove the threat they represent. These are the "compulsions" part of the condition.

For a more "traditional" example, someone experiencing intrusive thoughts that they might catch a communicable disease may obsessively wash their hands or google their symptoms to try to lessen the anxiety. While someone who is worried they might hurt someone (even though they very much do not want to hurt someone) may avoid being near sharp objects or may avoid the people they're afraid of hurting.

One of the issues with OCD is that performing the compulsions provides short term relief, but in the long term it only strengthens the stress caused by the intrusive thoughts, thus furthering the thought spiral and actively making it worse, to the point where, depending on your themes, you may be (almost) convinced that your intrusive thoughts represent the truth or the inevitable or something permanent.

Intrusive thought themes cam be literally anything, but some of the common ones are stuff like

Questioning your sexuality, gender, etc (what if I'm actually straight/gay/bi/trans/cis/etc?)

Being worried about losing control and hurting yourself or others physically, sexually, emotionally, basically any way (what if I want to kill someone? What if I'm a pedophile? What if I'm an abuser? What if I want to stab myself? Etc)

Fear of becoming or being sick

Worrying something bad will happen to you or people you care about

Worrying about your spiritual beliefs or lack thereof (what if I'm actually Christian? What if I'm actually atheist? What if i don't believe in the faith i ascribe to? Etc)

Worrying about relationship status (what if I don't actually love them? What if they're not "the one"? What if they're cheating? What if *I'm* cheating? Etc)

What if I'm a bad person?

Fear of losing things

Fear of things not feeling right (this is often be related to other themes via magical thinking. ex: if I don't have my things organized Just Right then something bad will happen)

Fear of unreality

Compulsions vary by theme a lot obviously, but some common ones include

Hand washing

Organizing things until they Feel Right

Checking and double checking and triple checking to make sure you did something correctly

Obsessively reviewing your memories to disprove a thoughtor make sure you don't believe something

Arguing against the thoughts in an attempt to disprove them

Testing your mental reactions to a thought or to certain kinds of content, to show yourself you don't actually believe or feel something

Obsessively googling symptoms, testimonies, things related to your thoughts

Obsessive prayer

Repeating phrases, mantras, affirmations, etc in an attempt to make thoughts go away

Avoiding things and situations that set off your intrusive thoughts

Repeatedly asking for reassurance from others ("I'm not being xyz, right?")

But yeah this obviously isn't exhaustive but, just, if this kind of thing sounds familiar, you should probably do some research on OCD, bc while intrusive thoughts can occur with other conditions, the intrusive thought-compulsion spiral is the core of OCD and isn't really a subaspect of depression/anxiety/ptsd/etc. and the treatment and management of OCD can look different from other stuff, so its a good thing to look into.

(Also it's important to keep in mind, esp if you're someone that doesn't have it, that someone's intrusive thoughts Are Not "secret desires" or "repressed urges" or anything the person even remotely wants to act on. Someone having harm-related intrusive thoughts is not at risk of actually acting on them, no matter how worried they are of doing so.)

Anyway this was a long post and I don't have a neat way to wrap it up and also I accidentally added a poll and now can't get rid of it so here's free poll. I'm running on nyquil and a small amount of straight gin (which works very well at numbing a sore throat) rn gnite

[hunterwritings]

𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡-𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝 | 𝐥𝐢𝐧 𝐤𝐮𝐞𝐢 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐨

summary: "Hey! I was wondering if you can write headcannons on the Lin Kuei trio being touch-starved? 😁" warnings: none i think notes: THIS IS THE GOOD SHIT

↳ 𝐁��-𝐡𝐚𝐧

i have a firm belief that this man is extremely touch-starved

Bi-han would never admit that he's touch-starved, in words at least

Physical affection is something Bi-han doesn't like to show in public, unless he is extremely stressed or he's trying to let someone else know that you're with him. If he sees Johnny playfully flirting with you, oh you better believe his hands are all over you. "C'mon gorgeous, you're made for the big screen! I bet millions of other people would agree with me, would make a lot of money in the box office too." Johnny smirked as he leaned back against his chair looking up at you. "Uh huh, very funny Cage." You rolled your eyes. Before Johnny could continue his hopeless flirting, you feel a cold hand wrap around you waist. You turn your head to see Bi-han standing behind you, he pulls you closer and lies his chin on your shoulder with his eyes glaring at Johnny. Oh if looks could kill, Johnny would be a dead man. "Woah there Blueberry Icee! I mean no harm!" He laughs and holds his hands up in defense. Bi-han just grumbles in response as he pulls you away from Johnny and walks away with you, his hands never leaving your waist.

Another scenario with Bi-han being very touchy, is when the two of you are lying down to go to sleep. This time in Bi-han's eyes is one of the best times of the day for him. It's the time when he doesn't have to keep that powerful aura to be a good leader, he can wind down and just relax with you in his arms. He holds your head close to his chest as he wraps his arms around your body. He has one of his hands caressing your head as he looks down at you, admiring everything about you. He wishes he could hold you like this forever and protect you from any harm that ever comes your way.

↳ 𝐊𝐮𝐚𝐢 𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐠

Kuai Liang is the type of person to see that he is touch-starved until he meets you.

When you two are together, he now sees how much he wants to hold you, to kiss you, to hold you in his arms. He would give anything to have you near him at all times.

Of course he wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable in any way, so he might hold back on wrapping his arms around you or kissing you in public at times. Until you tell him it's okay, then he wouldn't even dream of removing his hands from you.

He loves walking hand-in-hand with you, to feel your cold hand against his warm skin. It was the embodiment of relief to him.

There are many moments when you will be doing everyday tasks and Kuai Liang will just come up and hold you.

You stood at the edge of the stove, cooking dinner for you and your husband when you felt two warm hands wrap around your waist. A chuckle escaped your lips as you felt him lie his head on your shoulder, softly leaning against your head. "Do you need any help, my love?" He asks as he presses a kiss to your shoulder. "No, honey, I'm alright." You smile and lean your head against his. He smiled and pulled his head back to press his forehead against your shoulder as his large arms tightened around your waist. "You don't have to stay here with me if you don't want to." You reminded him, bringing one of your hands behind you to lie on top of his soft hair. "I know." He quietly responds. You can't help but turn around and face him. You reach your arms up to wrap around his shoulder as he never moves his arms from your waist. The look he gives you is pure awe, as if he had never seen anything so angelic in his life. He could never get tired of looking at you. You pull him close to you and press a sweet kiss to his lips, hearing him sigh of relief as soon as kissed him. He could never be stressed as long as he knew you were around.

↳ 𝐓𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐬

Tomas is a bit more shy when it comes to his relationship, it takes him a while to confess to his partner and even longer to initiate physical affection with you. He wants to hold his partner in his arms for all of eternity if he could, he wants to always keep you near him.

Tomas is almost like a lost animal, he wants to follow you around everywhere you go.

He likes the idea of being near you to protect you and show other people that you are with him. Though, most of the time it might have to be you that initiates physical affection while in public.

When the two of you are very close, it would be easier for him to hold you and touch you without feeling anxious.

He likes to caress your face and analyze every single detail of it. Every freckle, every scar, every color, he doesn't care, he just loves every single detail about you. There will be many times when the two of you are talking and Tomas would hold your face in his hands as he tried his best to listen to you.

You sat at one of the dining tables, sitting next to Tomas with your chair facing his as you held a small notebook with your training plans for the new initiates. "I was thinking of starting to train them at dusk and then continue throughout the day." You started to explain, looking down at your notebook. Tomas's eyes were dead set on you as he leaned his head against the palm of his hand, his arm resting against the wooden table. His eyes scanned your face as you spoke, trying his hardest to listen to your words but all he could focus on was your face. "Tomas, I feel like you're not listening to me." You raise your eyebrow at him as he silently snaps back into reality. "I am listening to you." He quietly says, reaching his hand up to lie on the side of your face, his thumb caressing over your cheek. "Really? Then what did I just say?" You smile, reaching your hand up to lie on top of his. "Um.." He trails off before the two of you laugh. "I'm sorry, it's so hard when you are this beautiful." He says as he reaches down to your chair and pulls you even closer to him. Now both of his hands rest on either side of your face as he presses his forehead against yours. "I wish I could stay like this forever." He whispers as he exhales deeply. "Maybe there will be a time when we can." You smile before leaning into him and pressing a soft kiss to his lips.

[gb-patch]

Sorry to send another ask amongst the sea I'm sure you're receiving, but I find myself more concerned about Rose being a sensitivity reader as I find more information. One of Rose's friends continues to insist that the conversation about Tamarack and male MCs was part of a larger discussion about biphobia in the fandom. However, they claim that Rose's position is "people erase Tam's bi/pansexuality by refusing to portray [her] as being attracted to anything other than men." This explanation of Rose's belief is, in-and-of-itself, biphobic. It claims that portraying Tamarack as attracted to men erases her queerness. This is textbook biphobia and bi-erasure that I as a bisexual encounter every day. It is NOT a good-faith defense of a queer character. It reduces us down to our partners and makes the claim that if we end up in a relationship that's "straight-passing," we're erasing our queerness. Especially as a bi sapphic myself, it reduces my identity strictly to the perceived-man I'm dating, and not my inner or previous experiences, or those of my partner. It's very uncomfortable that Rose, a non-bisexual, was discussing this like they're defending Tamarack's queerness when they're doing the opposite.

This is a doubly strange position when Our Life is a game about the acceptance of love in all its forms. The conversation could be different, MAYBE, if Our Life was a TV show or a book or a comic. But this is a game where people are meant to play as characters of their own design. I do not feel confident about Rose being a sensitivity reader for a game with bi/pansexual love interests if these are their beliefs about bi/pansexuality, particularly if they're unable to adapt their opinions to be relevant to different formats of media; this shows they're lacking in skill in the areas of media literacy and critical thinking.

I’ve been trying to make a post that presents the concerns people have about this, but your ask touches on the points I was going to, and I’d say it’s better to have it said by a player than me deciding what people are thinking. So, this is something that I want to make clear- that I see this and other asks/comments about it. What you’ve said is something a lot of people are unsure and upset about. I am sorry that you feel so out of place in this community now. And I am also sorry to players of any sexuality who use a male MC. That comment dismissed players and Tamarack’s identity.

It did come from a longer discussion about bi-phobia issues. The overall feelings were “if people did only want Tamarack to be interested in men, I really wouldn’t like that and wouldn’t it be a funny concept if Tamarack then left them for a woman?”. The comment itself didn’t encompass that idea at all. It does not give a good impression about where they’re coming from. It was unkind.

The viewpoint Rose is trying to have isn’t that “Tamarack can never express an interest in men” which would be wrong, it’s “I stand by the fact that Tamarack is someone who wouldn’t only be interested in men and no one else”. If it’s true that Rose likes Tamarack being interested in all genders and doesn’t want her bi-ness to be forgotten, I’d say that’s an acceptable view. If the point actually is that Tamarack should only be with women and if she’s not than Tamarack is no longer bi or she’s a bad character, then you're right- that isn't acceptable and that is going to get someone removed from the project. I do believe Rose agrees with what you’re saying and means it when they say they want to stop bi-erasure, not participate in it for real. But they had a very harsh way of talking about it.

I understand that people don’t know Rose and this situation has made them believe they do seriously hold that first view. But from working with them, there’s never been any feedback that shows an opinion of the sort.

Right now, I think that comment was being edgy and making a quick, very poorly-worded quip to people they’d been chatting with about that topic already. Rose has left the GB Patch discord servers, they used to be a mod, and may or may not ever be back in there. Rose won’t make blog posts responding to players going forward. They’re going to take a break from this and then try to give helpful feedback. We’re going to see if things can be okay from here.

And with this coming up, we’re all really aware that it’s something to consider about the game. I’m going to be as conscious as I can for any advice that seems to go against the character’s identities and I’m going to question my own knee-jerk choices for how I handle things. Other sensitivity readers will be able to give their viewpoints as well, so will the players. If the game’s content isn’t welcoming or is biased people will notice, and I’ll be here to accept what I’ve done. I don’t want that to be the result of this, of course. I hope the game will be thoughtful and considerate, but I can’t fire Rose at this point to try doing that.

No one has to keep following the game, though. I’m sympathetic to anyone who is too uncomfortable with all this to stay around.

[nitw]

this sexual orientation shit becomes so easy once you realize that your own gender matters more to you than it does to everyone else who perceives you and the inner complexities of it doesn't necessarily have to change other people's feelings towards you

i'm not bisexual but i'm gay in the way that sometimes a man is more like a beauitful woman to me and sometimes a beautiful woman would be pawesome as a man to me

[genderkoolaid]

I'm sorry but you people have demeaned the word lesbian so badly... the LITERAL definition of a lesbian is a NON-MAN who likes NON-MEN. How is that so fucking hard to understand? Not you specifically, but people like you have made it into something it's not; the whole "bi lesbian" and "straight lesbian" shit, saying trans men can date lesbians (which is literally just transphobic), straight up just saying lesbians can date men???? MEN???? DO YOU NOT HEAR YOURSELVES?

And now the whole butch discourse lmao. Sure, maybe in days long past it was a broader term, but today when someone hears the word butch, I can guarantee their minds will jump to a butch lesbian. If y'all want it to be the GBT community so bad then just say so

Also I can guarantee that you were one of the mfs laughing at lesbians who used he/him or he/they pronouns back in 2020 lmao performative ass bitch

Definitions of words do not descend from Heaven straight from the lips of God. We make them up! So I simply disagree with your definition of lesbian, as do many others. Personally, I enjoy the definition of "queer love/desire for women." For one, it centers lesbianism around women, instead of centering it around the exclusion of men. And two, "non-men loving non-men" is a definition which utterly erases nonbinary people. If an agender person is dating a neutrois person, they are not lesbians- or gay men- simply because y'all cannot get your head out of your binary asses for five seconds. "Non-men loving non-men" is a definition that attempts to be nonbinary-inclusive but only succeeds in making nonbinary & genderqueer identities palatable for radical feminism and political lesbianism. Honestly, I would prefer someone who defines lesbian as "woman loving woman" but understands that many people have complex relationships with womanhood while still feeling attached to the label of lesbian, than someone who uses this "NB-inclusive" definition and goes absolutely feral over genderqueers who are Doing It Wrong.

Anyways, speaking of radical feminism: acknowledging male lesbians and mspec lesbians is not "making lesbianism something its not." It is just recognizing the beautiful complexity that has always existed within lesbianism.

The lesbian community- which I'm using to refer to all kinds of communities organized around queer relationships to women & womanhood- has always been a haven for a lot more people than cis women exclusively into other cis women. The idea of sexuality-as-identity is very recent, and the idea of drawing a hard line between people who only like people of the same gender and people who like the same gender and more is also extremely recent. Beyond that, trans men and nonbinary people have always taken shelter under lesbianism. "Butch" in the context of lesbianism has always been a trans* identity, a way for people with a queer gender to find community and safety.

The reason why we have this idea of lesbianism as a strict category with hard borders is..... you guessed it..... radical feminism! And specifically "political lesbianism," which essentially placed woman-only relationships as the only true feminist relationship you could have. "Lesbian" became a political identity because of its focus on woman-woman relationships. But that meant that, for political lesbianism to be acceptable to radical feminism, it needed to conform to radical feminist beliefs about what makes a good feminist. Which meant:

No trans women or fems (because they are too male and probably predators)

No trans men or mascs (because they are too male and also traitors)

No bisexuals (because they are too male by association and are also traitors)

No penetrative sex, or at least no strap ons (because it imitates men)

No kinky sex (see above but with bonus "kink is evil" flavoring)

No butch/femme roles (because they imitate heterosexuality; everyone has to be neutrally androgynous).

I believe that much of modern lesbian discourse comes from trying to marry lingering radfem beliefs with modern attempts at trans-inclusivity. So you adapt the blatant transphobia: now, trans women are allowed in (as long as they are palatable to cis women), because they're women! And nonbinary people can also be allowed in- at first they were woman-aligned, and then later as long as they weren't man-aligned. Being butch/femme is Back In Style, but we have to soothe the gender anxiety that butches cause by assuring everyone that only True Lesbians can be butch, and butches are always women, even if they kind of aren't, but regardless they're definitely not men, because butch has always been a lesbian term (except it hasn't.) The discourse is haunted by the ideas that lesbianism is constantly under attack, more than anyone else, and that lesbian culture is unique and special and must be guarded from (male/-aligned) invaders who are probably also sexual predators.

To say that this is all just "days long pasts" ignores both that, in physical queer spaces there very much still are male lesbians and bi lesbians who are accepted parts of their local communities, and that you only see those days as "long past" because of the impact of radical feminism on lesbianism. The only reason you see these changes as a good thing is because you've swallowed radical feminist ideas without realizing it.

Also, "if you say butch most people will think of butch lesbians" is an extremely silly argument. Literally who fucking cares. If you say "man" there are still a lot of people who will immediately think of exclusively cis men (see: every feminist who says shit like "if men could get pregnant). Does that mean that trans men should just give up their identities because other people don't understand them? You dork?

Anyways. The funniest part of this ask is how damn confident you are that I was apparently hating on he/him lesbians three years ago. Idk how to tell you this but I'm a boygirl gaylesbianbisexual and have identified this way for years. I have been personally terrorized by shitty lesbian identity politics, the same ones you are repeating now, which told me that if I was even 1% male then identifying as a lesbian made me a disgusting predator. Which caused me years of suffering because no matter how hard I tried, I could not ignore my multigenderedness and how that affected my sexuality. Sowwy but you look silly as hell and your argument is bad and you should feel bad </3

[genderqueerdykes]

hi, i love your blog ❤️ i was wondering if you could talk a little about bi lesbians? as a gnc nb genderfluid femme bi dyke(fag) i'm again and again heartbroken by the hate and exclusion we get from fellow lesbians and especially from fellow femmes and it SUCKS to always have to check someones bio in fear and to be constantly likened to terfs and fascists. thank you 💖

hello there, sure! this is a great ask

i've observed that too- specifically in the white cis femme community, there is a lot of hostility toward lesbians who are attracted to men and/or have slept with men. a lot of it stems from lesbian separatism and radfeminism- a lot of white cis femmes get wrapped up in that culture very easily, unfortunately

there's a lot of hostility toward male and transmasculine lesbians in the white cis femme community. i love cis femmes, but unfortunately many have fallen down the terf rabbit hole and believe that lesbian means woman attracted woman only, and it's unfortunate, because it's such a narrow view on lesbianism and leaves out most of the varied and complex relationships with sexuality and gender when it comes to lesbianism. unfortunately many white cis femme lesbians get wrapped up in believing that any expression of masculinity beyond androgyny or soft butch is too "aggressive" or "hostile".

a lot of people hold the belief that for whatever reason a lesbian is "tainted" once they've slept with a man, as though other lesbians will catch some type of contageous disease just by being near a lesbian who sleeps with men. it's really childish behavior- it's okay to not be attracted to men, but it's not a personal attack when another lesbian does find men attractive. it doesn't say anything about you- your partner's sexual identity doesn't have to line up 1:1 with yours in order to be legitimate

i know MANY lesbians who are attracted to men in some capacity or another and don't even consider themselves bisexual. for some people they acknowledge that attraction but don't consider it to be something that changes who they are, and this is an okay expression of this experience as well

bi lesbians have always been a part of the community, there are many photographs from events both recent and further in the past that show support for and acknowledgement of bisexual lesbians. dyke marches in particular have been very inclusive spaces for bi lesbians, and queer protests and pride meetups usually have a good number of bi lesbians among the crowd. it's a term that's been used for decades, and the example that i have readily available is a comic strip written by Alison Bechdel in 1999:

there's no reason why lesbian/sapphic/dyke attraction would be "cancelled out" by being attracted to men- one does not stop having a sapphic relationship with other people just because they find men attractive, especially considering that some men are lesbians, too. genderfluid and bigender people exist as well and it's okay for lesbians to be attracted to people with multiple genders

a lot of butches identify as both men and women and it doesn't make their partners not lesbians to be attracted to them. lesbian attraction is complex and there is a lot more to it than just being attracted to women. there's a lot of culture rooted in genderfuckery here, and even if a lesbian is attracted to a cis man, it doesn't matter. that's still okay. it doesn't 'cancel out' their lesbianism

some bi lesbians aren't even attracted to men, but rather a multitude of other genders. that doesn't make them not lesbians, either. you don't just stop being a lesbian just because you're attracted to multiple genders. it doesn't change anything about you, especially not the rest of your identity and your focus in life. for some, the people they're attracted to is very important and for others it's just a fact of life that isn't their primary focus

it doesn't make a woman or lesbian "straight" to be attracted to genders other than women

i hope that was what you were looking for! if you have any questions feel free to ask!

[stardew-and-cozycore]

My personal ideas about the bachelor's and Bachelorette's sexualities (its ok if you don't feel the same. These, again, are just my feelings and thoughts):

Penny: a lesbian but doesn't know it. She believes in the nuclear family and grew up in a strict household. This has led her to believe that she is straight, despite her always making time for Maru and the farmer. She could marry a man and have kids, but that's more out of belief of what's right than actual love.

Maru: pan and proud of it. I could see her going to pride parades and bringing her partner.

Alex: he would either be straight or gay. I think it's all in how you read his conversations with the farmer tbh. You could take his comments as flirty jokes or as kind of mean to keep you away.

Harvey: straight. He just seems like your stereotypical anxious nerd I'm sorry.

Hayley: lesbian. 100% lesbian. Trying to convince herself she's straight and that overwhelming feeling she has for women is just deep friendship.

Elliot: bi all the way. He's too dramatic to be straight.

Leah: lesbian. She's an artist with a cabin and wears a braid and wears suspenders. I've never seen a straight woman wear suspenders on the reg.

Sebastian: straight or gay. I still can't figure it out.

Sam: straight. Skater gamer boy who loves his family and wants one of his own.

Emily: I honestly see her as pan but more on the aromantic spectrum. Like she's just super bubbly and happy and isn't actually looking for a relationship.

Abigail: bi but leans more towards women. This needs no explanation.

Shane: I've always seen him as straight ngl. But could also see him marrying someone he cherished deeply as a friend to keep them around so he could have a bit of happiness daily.

[snixkers]

sub!spencer thoughts?

Ummm, yes, please? Have you seen this man????

I have a whole list of beliefs about this man in the sheets 🤭

SUGGESTIVE CONTENT, SPOILERS AHEAD

Ok, so first off, sub spencer believer

But like I also don't believe he's always on the bottom???

Am I being converted to soft!dom spencerism? (Thx @incognit0slut)

He doesn't want you to have to lift a finger

Just lie back and let him do his thing

And ummmm vocal

Yeah no way this man is silent

He's calling YOU daddy, not the other way around

And some ppl think after prison he's suddenly a hardcore dom?

Idk about that 😐

He'd totally love you taking control but knowing he has a say in everything

Putting my AP Psych to use here

And ik everyone in the fandom can agree, but sorry, I just had to say

The head game is immaculate

That boy is on death row and your pussy is his last meal

Plus, the hair is grippable asf

And I have a picture of MGG I'm taking to my grave buttt

Let's just say it's canon that he's packing

Oh and he's bi

Sorry I saw that lil smile with Ethan

Will never forgive the network for the queer erasure ✊🏻😔

So he literally doesn't care what you look like

Skinny, fat, anything

If he loves you, he's gonna put everything he has into that relationship (and the bedroom)

Ok now I can rest 🫠🫠🫠

[dinogoofy]

Guys I'm having too many good ideas...!

So, Bi-han arranged marriage! Let's say that he and his wife don't get along well. She is stubborn, but very kind and loyal to her family, while Bi-han is a bit of an asshole and doesn't like her because she has her own beliefs and won't budge from them. She hates how the Lin kuei have been treating businesses and how scummy some of their practices are, and He hates that she's "so righteous" and above the work that they do.

They really don't get along, and then one day she gets kidnapped by someone who is enemies with the Lin Kuei.

She is hurt and tortured, but again, she's stubborn as hell. She doesn't break. The Lin kuei are made aware that the grandmaster's wife has been kidnapped, but Bi-han doesn't have much of a reaction besides sending someone to go find her. Besides, it's not like they'd get much use from her. She stays out of their dirty affairs so she'll be fine.

She goes through some shit, because even though she doesn't know anything, she knows that won't stop them from trying to get any information out of her. She stays dead silent the entire time she is kidnapped, furious the whole time. Part of her wants to hold out hope that her husband will come get her, but the majority of her believes that he'd let her rot.

Finally, someone finds her. But it's not her husband. (Smoke or kuai maybe?) She's severely hurt, but still stubborn enough to be furious that he couldn't be bother to come save his own Wife. They make it back to the Lin Kuei, and she spends her time avoiding Bi-han the first few days. Then, some of the clan elders start to get into Bi-hans head. She certainly broke. She leaked their location or joined the enemy. Look at her, she's weak and she doesn't support what our clan does. She must have broken.

So, Bi-han, enraged by the idea that she betrayed him, storms off to go find her.

When he does find her, she's getting ready to change. She's not letting her pain or soreness show through in front of a man she hates, and he scoffs, thinking that she was fine. That they probably went easy on her as she was so pitiful.

Bi-han is aggressive while asking if she broke. She rolls her eyes.

"It's been three weeks, and the first think you care about is if I broke." She huffs. Bi-han narrows his eyes. She shakes her head. "-and no. For your information. I didn't. You of all people should know I'm stubborn. As much as I don't like how you run this clan, I don't endanger my family."

Part of him doesn't want to believe her, but she starts to change, not caring if he's in the room, and something ugly inside him formes when he sees her deep bruises and cuts. Wounds on every part of her body.

At first he was angry at her, and now he's engulfed in rage at what they had done to HIS wife. A small, quiet part if his conscious is angry that he left her there, and he wasn't the one to find her and slaughter every man that laid a hand on her. He knew he could've found her much sooner than whoever he sent, but he didn't care. And this is what happened.

But he had learned to ignore his consciousness long ago.

Before the incident, She would have tried to speak to him when he could. Simply trying to be cordial and polite. She would ask him what he wanted to eat that night, or ask him if he was okay after a particularly rough mission. Just because she didn't really like him or what he does, doesn't mean she wasn't willing to try.

After she was kidnapped however, that stopped.

She stoped speaking to him. She avoided him whenever she could. She couldn't care less when he left or when he came back. He abandoned her with torchurers. Why would she?

This starts to irk Bi-han. One day, he comes home and she's still avoiding him. He gets fed up with it and confronts her. She basically rolls her eyes and tries to avoid him, but he grabs her by the arms, careful not to press into her bruises, and gets into her space. She's taken aback by the closeness, but her expression hardens.

"Why should I care about you, when you left me to die." She snarls. Bi-han is enraged.

"You think that your kidnapping didn't effect me?! You don't even know how the sight of your bruises enrage me! I have slaughtered every man who laid a hand on you. Do you understand that?!" Bi-han is acting like a wild animal. He's breathing hard, his eyes narrowed and filled with rage. All she can do is stare. Her face has softened. She doesn't knownwhat to say. Bi-han's face morphs when he realises how close he is to her, and he lets her go and steps back aggressively. He stalks off without another word, leaving her confused, unable to cone to terms with the fact that the ever-cold Bi-han would ever be this emotional over someone he doesn't even like.

Right...?

[thelesbianpoirot]

your entire shtick sounds like ur a white girl terf lesbian loser who racefakes being Black just to get some credibility and pity for your virulent transphobia and internalised homophobic tendencies. youre so despicable that you gotta add some oppression to your unlikeable persona just to get pity. And if you are Black -- this is sad. The white terfies dont actually love you, you're a diverse little asset to them. Have the day you deserve.

You believe i'm a lesbian more than you believe i'm black? I can't be black because I disagree with you? And if I am black, I believe what I do because I want to be approved of by white people?

So I must align with white people to disagree with you.

Because only white people are capable of defiant "bad" thoughts? If you really saw black people as complete human beings instead of sock puppets for your causes, you would have space in your mind for black people who disagree with you outside of any relationship they have to white people. "Terfies" aren't an established group like a fandom, it's a label thrown at any woman in defiance of the current status quo. Conservative women who would sooner see abortion banned and every woman het married with kids, or apolitical horny lesbians/bis who watch porn all day every day, and go to strip clubs are classed as radical feminists because they know pussy from dick. Face it! Some of these women are black, brown, disabled, bi, lesbian, autistic, and have been or currently identified as trans. Rebel women are in every group. No group of women are exempt from your witch hunt. "The white terfies dont actually love you" How to admit your entire belief system is predicated not on arguments you truly believe in or facts, but how nicely people treat you, and love bomb you into their cult. Being black does not get you "credibility" in radblr orbit. It doesn't even get me pity, I keep getting random accusations of bigotry from within this same orbit for my other views. It gets you anonymous cowardice messages like this. It is not some bigotry free space, but I am sooner debated about bullshit than tokenized as an expert of race relations. Unlike faux tumblr "leftish" groups that treats every black person off the street like a trained activist if they agree with them enough, when many are ignorant scammers, much like themselves. Birds of a feather. Nothing was a bigger indication of my internalized homophobia than the years I wasted pretending I was something I am not, a male, or bisexual (willing to accept any genitals a sexual partner may have). I am a big o'l black lesbian woman and my happiness is not dependent on what foreign whites think of me. It is dependent on the success of my goal of world domination. Sincerely,

A defiant loudmouth Negress.

Hard to tell but that's my middle finger.

[damnfandomproblems]

https://www.tumblr.com/damnfandomproblems/770147466554359809/fandom-problem-6771-tfw-you-try-to-find-other?source=share

This is such a frustrating take and belief. No, OP, they weren't imposters, they were who they said they were. They were genuinely obnoxious, unimpeded.

I'm so sorry, I hate to break it to you but POCs are capable of being raging assholes and racists to white people and other POCs just as anyone else is. Never forget the slurs African Americans tend to hurl at their fellow African American who act "White", who have "White" jobs, or live in a "White" house, or who dare to leave "The Hood."

LGBT people are capable of being wildly exclusive and vile toward other LGBT people. Ever heard of lesbians refusing to date or even accept Bi-women if they have ever been with an icky, disgusting man even once?

Of course, we all know about the infamous radfems and terfs that will turn on the women they claim to be supporting the moment they don't kiss the ground they walk on. Who here hasn't been called a "Pick Me" at this point? I've lost count!

Now, OP is likely half joking in their post, so don't think I'm ranting and raving at them. But they bring up an unfortunate belief in some people. There are a lot of people who actually believe this. We've seen it here, on this blog alone.

Regardless of ethnicity, of sexual or gender identity, of religious belief, it is an unfortunate fact that assholes exist amongst them all. By pretending that "No, they are actually imposters, likely evil white people in masquerade to make us look bad!", you're enabling them. Giving them a free pass by saying "no one of [ethnic group/LGBT/Religious belief] are ever bad people, they can never be bad people."

I know that I will get clapback from this. After all, this week alone we've seen certain anons lose their shit at the prospect that POCs aren't benign angels, and white people aren't demons incarnate. So, my apologies to the Mods in advance.

But to OP and those with the same thought pattern, please take off your blinder and accept that POCs/LGBTs/Religious people are capable of being dickbags and assholes. They don't need some shadowy organization to do it for them. They're more than able to do it themselves.

Posting as a response to a previous problem.

[midnightmah07]

are you going to address the homophobia allegations?

I thought that post was deleted but apparently it wasn't, so sure, I will address it, but mainly because I don't want people mistaking my religious belief as hatred and discrimination.

A while ago, a rebloged a post that said that sin is a choice, and among the said sins, there was homosexuality. I can't find the post on my account (I'm genuinely not joking, I used the search tool in my account to look for it but I couldn't find it), but if you want you can look around my account and find the post and read it for yourself, don't take my word for it, in fact, I encourage you to do that. Someone made a post about me being homophobic because of it, but thankfully, there were people that were kind enough and decided to ask what I meant when I rebloged it instead of just labelling me as a homophobe, and for that, I am deeply grateful.

Now, I am a Christian, and what this means is I follow Jesus Christ and His teachings as stated in the Bible, and I believe the Bible is the unfailable word of God. This is said so in my intro post as I do not hide this fact. Now, whether you agree with it or not, the Bible does state that homosexuality is a sin, and the bible also shows that sin is a choice that all of us do, but it's not in the way these people who are calling me homophobic think it is. I don't believe someone simply wakes up one day and says "wow I'm going to feel attracted to the same sex", no. Frankly, I think that's a stupid way of viewing things. What I do believe in is that this attraction is one of the many temptations sent by the devil, it's not the only one, but it's one of, and it's up to the person to fall into that temptation or to live for Christ and deny the desires of their flesh (by the way, this goes for EVERY and ANY sin, not just homosexuality).

Still, I have never once discriminated against anyone because of their sexuality, in fact, if I did that, I myself would be sinning because discrimination and prejudice is also a sin. Most of my friends are from the LGBT community, and I love all of them dearly, and would never wish anything bad for them. People have value simply for existing, they're deeply loved by God, and they're made in His image, so I respect everyone and anyone because of their value as a person. It does not matter to me if you're straight, gay, bi, or any other sexuality or identity, we may disagree, yes, but you're still important and I still love you. Jesus sat among sinners, He did not tell them to continue sinning but He never shied away from them, instead He reached out to them and called them for a life of repentance and love.

Lastly, I will not push my religious beliefs onto anyone, and I haven't done so in the past either. Yes, I do wish that everyone would follow Christ, but that's because I believe He's the true living God, but I will not and cannot force anyone to do so unless they want to from the bottom of their heart. God does not want robots forced to love Him, He wants His children to accept and love Him out of their free will.

I won't apologize for my beliefs as I have done nothing wrong, however I will apologize for how the post I rebloged from was written, since I believe it could've been clearer. I am making this post because I want to put an end to this misinformation and misunderstanding, and I want my mutuals to know this for themselves and decide if they want to continue being mutuals with me or not. I would be very sad if not, but no one is obligated to be my friend, follower or anything else. If you are reading this and you for some reason think what I said so far is wrong, it's ok to unfollow me/block me, I will not be angry. Do as you please.

[stickthroughthephases]

A while ago "Toxic TikTok boymoms" came on my YouTube feed and obviously, I watched several videos by various YouTubers showcasing the weird dynamics that mothers with sons have and the lowkey conditional love they give to their daughters.

It weirdly got me thinking about Bi-Han and his relationship with his father (ok I'm always thinking about it to some degree, sue me). What if their father knew he was weak (old man himself), in a way that he knew that he could not do more for the clan since they've already spent centuries just being Earthrealm butlers protectors for Liu Kang. Perhaps his wife was the more ambitious one but he knew that it was not possible. For that reason, if maybe the heir was a girl there would be a better chance his daughter wouldn't follow his wife's ambitious view of being more than simply protectors because you know, she would be her "father's daughter". Much to his dismay, he had a boy who despite trying, could not bond with, whilst Bi-Han and his mother became super duper close. He hoped for another girl when his wife fell pregnant with Kuai Liang, but something was different this time, maybe it was his eyes that resembled his wife (he loved his wife but like he had other issues) or baby Kuai's cute little smile, thus he grew to love Kuai Liang, as opposed to Bi-Han :(.

To beat out the ambition of Bi-Han, he simply trained him harder and drilled in his head his duty to Earthrealm. An interesting headcanon is that Bi-Han's father just didn't like him, did anyone ever consider that? He tried his best to be loved by and seek his father's approval but even in his dying breath, he denied Bi-Han that love. What if in his final moments, he proclaimed his true wishes, wishing that Kuai Liang was the older and Grandmaster? What if he taunted him that Tomáš was better than him despite not being born a Lin Kuei? What if Bi-Han did try to save him but in the end he could not, simply because this man would never love him? Considering we know nothing yet besides two sort of conflicting ideas of who their father was to the brothers, who is to say their father didn't just simply make a 180-degree change following the years he had his second son, additionally, it could explain why he felt so compelled to take in Tomáš instead of just sending him to Liu Kang at the Wu Shi Academy or raised with Raiden or Kung Lao. I'm here to give Bi-Han a depressing backstory and justify him letting his dad die -*send tweet*.

If Bi-Han simply let his dad die to become Grandmaster, that storyline would be far more reasonable if he was the second son, he would have a motive because contrary to popular belief, I refuse to believe that this man is just a psychopath who holds no remorse for his actions. I also don't like the angle that Sektor poisoned him but I mean if take into account the previous timeline Sektor, maybe it's possible (WE ALWAYS have to consider previous timelines ok, nothing exists in a vacuum, even if its a new timeline) but that could have been possible without any gender change or romantic relationship hints.

Honestly, if by some miracle, NRS decides to show us a flashback in the games of their father's death, I hope there is SOME argument and fighting rather than watching Bi-Han stand over his father's dying body. I don't care if this is just a fighting game, if you made it and put effort into creating characters why not give them complex and fledged out backstories and archs, if you don't care why bother with the comics, movies and other media surrounding the characters.

[pillarsalt]

as someone who is genuinely truly gender critical (critical of conservative gender and transgenderism) i have never felt so alone in my life. conservatives hate me. liberals hate me. incels hate me. radfems hate me. men hate me. women hate me.

the supreme court of the united fucking kingdom is using talking points and lingo made up in 2010 by teenage girls bending over backwards to defend perverted men. the other side of the argument is brought by conservatives who at best wouldn't mind if we regressed women's rights back to the 1800s and at worst are actively trying to do so.

meanwhile, on a general society level, we have the aforementioned perverted men and their teenage supporters who, regardless of what year they were born, have not progressed past that 2010 mindset. they genuinely believe women is a feeling/aesthetic/opt-in-free-attention-machine. and in the other corner, the only corner with the potential to actually empower and defend women, we have a wave of radfems who can't even pretend to be tolerant of straight, bi, gnc, and/or autistic women for 2 seconds (sad and ironic because i highly suspect most of them are one of if not multiple of these things) who lay the blame of the actions and beliefs of perverted men on said women. because us not killing every man on sight means we're the reason they get away with everything.

i have never felt so alone. i don't think we're ever getting out of this. how do you cope with this?

Anon, I want to tell you, I have felt this way many times and I'm sure I will again. I totally understand the impending doom feeling. It's hard to escape. But I want you to know, you are absolutely not alone, not at all.

I also want you to know that unfortunately, bad news frequently overshadows good news, especially online. The shocking and horrific generate more media interest than the hard fought battles being won by people and groups who are interested in positive change. But positive change is happening, even when its hard to see right away. To quote Martin Luther King Jr.: "First, the line of progress is never straight. For a period a movement may follow a straight line and then it encounters obstacles and the path bends. It is like curving around a mountain when you are approaching a city. Often it feels as though you were moving backwards, and you lose sight of your goal: but in fact you are moving ahead, and soon you will see the city again, closer by."

WRT the tumblr-esque rhetoric influencing national policy: I truly believe we are advancing past what has been a weird ass period where this religious "no debate" thing dominates liberal politics. Liberals across the world, I believe, are realizing it's a losing game, and that we can't let people who deny basic reality dictate policy for everyone else. I really truly get where you're coming from, but as someone who's been paying attention to this since 2015/16ish, it seems to have peaked around 2020ish, and on a steady decline since then.

They're their own worst enemies: at first your average left of centre person thought of trans issues basically as very gender nonconforming gay people who experience extreme distress about their sex (and that's not to say these people don't still exist,) but now with the mercurial rise of trans activism as we know it, more and more average voters are exposed to realities of gender ideology like male rapists in women's prisons, males in women's sports, the medical exploitation of gender nonconforming kids, and so on. Even just anecdotally I have seen TONS more people speaking openly about their dissent, when they would have kept their mouths shut before. Now a widespread conservative backlash is absolutely not what we want, and it's why the liberal governments of the world need to step up and get their shit together right the fuck now. Conservatism is dangerous and we need to fight as hard as we can to stop it in its tracks. But with added and continued pressure from everyone who's working to do so, this WILL happen. We can make it happen.

In respects to what's troubling you about the radical feminism community, I understand where you're coming from there too. But again, it's a problem with the most vitriolic people having the loudest voices despite being in the minority. Radfems do not hate you. There are a rash of individuals who through rad/feminism (especially online) have found a great way to browbeat other women and feel morally superior. Any special interest group is going to have people who try to use it to their advantage for ego stroking and social status purposes. Please try to remember they are just people, like you. They can be, and often are, just plain wrong. You have no obligation to take anybody's word as gospel, even if they get mad at you for it.

I don't take anyone seriously who'd rather infight constantly than find common ground with her fellow woman, even if there's disagreement. Women's liberation is the number one priority when it comes to feminism, and as a woman, you have every right to be here. Don't take any bullshit personally, be confident but curious in your beliefs. And please don't give up, not on the world and not on feminism. You are a worthwhile person, things will look brighter sooner than later. I know this from experience. I hope you hang in there, you can message me any time or send another ask anonymously if you want. It's hard work to push through the doom, but you can do it. Be well! 💜💜💜